Breakdown
PG - Aya/Kaori, Kei/Yuko - timeline : late 1999, before Aya's graduation - WC : 485
~*~
Seeing Kaori break down after the show is something Kei will never forget.
She closes the door to their dressing room behind her and even though she doesn't mean to stare, her eyes are fixed on Aya and Kaori on the other end of the room.
Wrapped in each others arms, Kei can see Kaori's shoulders shaking, her sobs filling the awkward silence that has settled over them all, while Aya's lips are moving, silent whispers of soothing nonsense escaping her mouth that are too soft to reach anybody's ears but Kaori's.
It's a heart-wrenching moment, and for some strange reason, Kei feels like slapping Aya for putting Kaori through something so cruel.
But of course she knows that it's not her position to say something and so she keeps quiet as she makes her way across the room.
She passes Sayaka and Maki, who are talking quietly, in hushed voices, their heads lowered and Maki raises a hand to her face, quickly wiping away another wave of unwanted tears.
Across from them, Mari and Natsumi are sitting in front of their mirrors, fidgeting with the make-up kits, the accessories, half-heartily trying to get ready to leave the studio.
For a split moment, Kei's eyes meet Mari's, and they both smile at each other, small, forced smiles that hold no sign of happiness, only of the knowledge that this sadness will pass, that they will manage to go on, eventually, without Aya.
When she reaches her own space and sinks down onto her chair, some of the unease seems to leave her body as she allowes her limps to relax.
Next to her, Yuko turns to face her and, without saying a word, grasps her hand, holding on tightly.
Kei squeezes the hand in hers, then leans forward so that she is right next to Yuko, her mouth next to her ear.
"Don't you ever do something like this to me!" she whispers and when she pulls back, their eyes meet and Yuko nods, a slight nod of understanding and agreement, before she lets go of Kei's hand and proceeds to follow Mari and Natsumi, who've already changed back to casual clothing.
Kei sighs deeply and turns towards her own mirror, her eyes lifting to spot Aya and Kaori's reflection behind her.
Even though they are still tightly wrapped in each other's arms, Kaori finally seems to have calmed down, the tears gone from her eyes, and Aya is busy wiping away the last remains of them from Kaori's cheeks.
They share a smile and for a moment, it feels like nothing has changed and the world will always go on like this, all eight of them sharing a room, at concerts, at rehearsals, at tv shows.
But then that feeling is gone and Kei only hopes that the lingering sadness will pass soon, because she doesn't know how long they all can bear it.
FIN