A/N: It's update time! I'm back and I'm here to wave the flag. Wuaha... This week was rather a busy week for me, I'm sorry, I had a lot of problems and projects that I had to resolve. I had exams and some tests this week and I'm actually glad that I got over them with good grades.
If anyone's wondering what
Kiriban is, it means pausing in a good number, I think. So I'll be having another Kiriban at 1000+ page views, what I'll post for that Kiriban is something random, it might be another drawing or a shot.
Hmm...since we're up to Part III, I want to discuss to you about Gekikara's personality, you all might seemed to be a bit uneasy or you might find it odd why Gekikara acts like this. I'll give you a few reasons why she acts like this and what exactly am I thinking for her personality.
Reasons:- Gekikara has a past with Black, before Rappapa even started, before she even met Yuko.
- The reasons why Gekikara is odd, childish and sweet is simply because I kind of deducted that people with insanity or mental problems are mostly either sweet and childish or violent and dangerous. I picked the former because it seems to fit Gekikara perfectly well, given how much she acted in MG II, wherein she tries to keep her promise of graduating and also her concern and worry for Gakuran, who took the battle with Shibuya that was supposedly meant for her. She also has this cute childish scene in ep 1 where she was supposedly studying and she snapped her pencil.
- I think Gekikara fits being an odd sweet and childish queen when she's sane, mostly because I can't picture her being suave.
Anyways, so much for that. Thank you for still reading, commenting and giving me thanks, please stick to me until the end of this shot and until another start of a new shot. Thank you very much!
Replies:@kahem - You sure seem to like the idea of the guy being beaten to a pulp by Gekikara. Also, practice is the key to good art? Hahaha, I'm sure you can draw like that to!
@ShibuyaDokiDoki - Impatient, are we not, Shi-san?
@XxRoByNxX78 - Thank you for commenting!
@sakura_drop_ - I'm glad you like it, though I'm not really sure if it was that sweet...? I still hope that I fulfilled a part of your request. ^ ^
Eh? Thank you for complementing my drawing, but please don't envy my drawing skills, its still very poor.
" Comics though, not sure about that...I don't think my art is up for something like that.
@oddball - Gekikara does want to do it, for a long time, maybe? Also, the relationship between Gekikara and Black and why their acting like that with each other has a background story, they actually had a past together.
@RenaChii - I love your avatar.
@yukofan - Thank you for the complement...eh, comics? I don't think I can do that yet.
@immortal_K- Your comment will always be valid to me, commenting a story is never too late or too early, immortal-san!
Gakuran and Shaku are Gekikara's caretaker and small friends, they seriously care for our queen, you can say that in a week, they would visit as much as they can.
Yes, Black does mean a lot to Gekikara here, they have a past together, before they even met Yuko and the other Rappapa queens. Gekikara of course knows Black more than what the others think she does, so her concern over Black is reasonable.
Now that I finished replying to your comments, here's Part III of Chinmoku! Hope you enjoy reading!
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Chinmoku
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Part III
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Two girls stood in the middle of an empty street under the starry night sky. It was cold and dark, but the two continued to stand still like statues. There was silence between the two, as well as the too much noticeable atmosphere that was tense and hard.
The shorter of the two was grasping firmly onto the tall raven’s shoulders, almost afraid of letting go, feeling the uncertainty that was uneasily eating away in her heart. Although she is a strong Yankee that does not mean that Gekikara did not have any fears.
In fact, Gekikara was dreading for the former queen’s reaction. Gekikara knew what fear is. She had already learned how and what she feared for the time that she had almost faced death. It made her stomach lurch back almost unsettlingly because she is currently facing the fear she has for Black, the fear of being rejected and hated.
Gekikara waited patiently for what seemed to be eternity, but was in fact seconds, when the older girl finally recovered from the initial shock and pain of younger girl’s confession.
Black looked away from the shorter queen and lowered her head, her lips pressed into a tight flat line. The former queen’s bangs covered her eyes, making it vague for Gekikara to know what the other girl was feeling. It only served to increase the dreadfulness that started to build-up in the sane queen’s heart when the raven opened her mouth and started talking.
“Why…”
“Why did you do that…?” Black whispered; her tone was cold, harsh and firm. The raven’s hands were clenched tightly on both of her sides. She kept her gaze on the concrete pavement and stood still, she just could not find it in herself to look at Gekikara.
Not now.
Not with
this hanging up in the air.
Gekikara shook her head helplessly and looked away from the other girl, slowly loosening the firm grip she had on the other teen’s shoulder. The sane queen refused to talk and resolved onto chewing her bottom lip.
Black clenched her jaw when her question was met by silence, yet she continued into pressing the other girl by repeating her question, this time, the raven did not hold down her voice and shouted, almost uncharacteristically.
“Why did you do that?”
“Do you know what you’re doing?” Black questioned angrily, the raven took a short pause and inhaled shakily. Black’s hands continued to be clenched tightly; both were trembling, as if willing themselves to release the tention, yet Black held onto her desire to hurt Gekikara and her hands remained in their current position.
“Out of all the things you could do…why did it have to be that?”
“There’s no more point in delving into that issues, yet why are you trying to dig it up?”
The former queen shook her head in disapproval while she ran her hands through her soft black tresses, trying to ease whatever impending headache was making its way into her senses.
Gekikara merely shuffled her foot on the concrete pavement as she continued to listen to every word Black spoke. The younger queen could still not look up and face Black.
Insane as she could possibly act and think at times, Gekikara was still sane. No matter how violent she could get or how her temper acts up quicker than her rationality, she was still sane. That is the very reason why Gekikara was still able to continue living, because she was sane. She knew whom she owed her sanity.
The shorter girl owed her sanity to Black.
If not for the older girl’s calming voice and presence, Gekikara’s mind would be in total chaos. In truth, without Black’s help two years ago, she might as well have been dead before she could even meet Yuko or the other three queens.
It is the very reason why Gekikara respected Black. It is the very reason why she loves the older teen’s presence and her warmth, and although insane as she may come out in front of all the other fighters she had pulverized, the sane queen knew how much the other girl meant to her.
She owed Black her life.
She owed the raven everything that she is, and everything that she had. Black probably might not even remember what she had done two years ago, but Gekikara knew it very well.
There would not be any point now in her life if Black hates her. Yuko is already gone, and the other queens are moving on with their lives. Gekikara, however, was still stuck in the past, unable to move forward in the present and look ahead into the future.
Her present and future was already chained and locked up. She knew, trying not to care, that she had met a dead end for a long time ago.
The future had nothing in store for the sane queen but without caring, without wanting to care about that matter, Gekikara wanted to make a future for the other girl, even if Black would disapprove of it.
Yet it hurts.
It hurts.Disgust and disapproval hurts.
If physical pain did not hurt her, emotional pain can kill her.
…That is why Gekikara did not look up.
She knew that there would not be any point to look into the other girl’s eyes if it meant that she just have to see that disapproving, unpleased and angry eyes. It would just hurt emotionally to see those expressions that Gekikara did not want any Rappapa members, especially Black, to bore onto her frail looking figure.
“It’s pointless…”
“What you did was pointless, Gekikara.” Black said.
The former queen was too angry that she did not even seem to notice the younger queen’s inner struggle or how Gekikara’s expression contorted to an agonizing expression when she heard Black’s words.
“It wasn’t pointless.”
“He deserved it.” Gekikara whispered, almost in a hushed manner.
“Yet you shouldn’t have done that.”
“Such occurrence was not needed.”
Gekikara’s eyes widened at the older raven’s statement. Immediately, the sane queen looked up and stared at Black, disappointed and at the same time hurt that the other girl was declining the justice she was serving her.
“But he needed to be punished…!”
“After all this time that you’ve suffered because of him…he deserved what he got!” Gekikara shouted, reasoning out whatever little ideas her brain could process and what little restrain she could afford to hold onto.
“Look… Don’t put justice into your hands Gekikara.” Black countered back.
“Why?”
“Why can’t I?”
“If I have the power to do so, then why can’t I?!”
The sane queen looked down and glared at her own pair of feet, trying to restrain herself from acting violently, knowing that the tension between her and Black was rising to the point that it could get dangerous the moment she let temper get the best of herself. Gekikara never had a battle with Black, not once before.
Whether Black’s fighting prowess was aligned with her own was still undetermined and Gekikara did not want to find out who is stronger between her and Black.
Not like
this.
Due to the raven’s own anger, Gekikara too was affected drastically by her temper and without a warning; she started reacting onto the emotional force that was pushing her. The younger queen however only resolved to stomp her feet in anger, throwing up a tantrum rather than acting brutally.
“If I can fight and destroy him then why shouldn’t I put justice into my hands?” Gekikara hissed; the younger queen scrunched her face into angry scowl.
Suddenly, Gekikara stood still, and almost eerily, the younger girl’s face turned from a scowl and into a blank expression. The next thing the shorter queen did was look into Black’s pure dark orbs and asked in an almost frighteningly emotionless voice:
“Why can’t I?”
Black furrowed her brows and looked away, disturbed, too disturbed. Yet the older teen still kept herself on ground. There was no point in backing down, there was no point in fearing Gekikara’s odd silence, or how she was almost trying to trigger the shorter queen’s insanity.
“Because it’s wrong, Gekikara.” Black shortly reasoned out. It did not convince Gekikara though. It only caused the current heavenly queen to hurl out a series of loud insane laughter, which filled the silence that filling the whole street they took.
“Wrong? Hehehe…hahaha!”
The shorter teen grabbed a fist full of her hair and pulled onto her black tresses, still giggling madly as she took heavy wobbly steps forward to the alarmed raven. The younger queen’s resistance was almost ready to snap, as well as her current state of saneness.
“Wrong you say?”
“As if what he did to you wasn’t wrong!” Gekikara spat, the tone of her voice was venomous, almost too dangerous that Black had to back away when the younger girl tried to approach her.
The angry insane queen did not stop. Nor did her steps falter. She continued to walk forward with heavy angry footsteps, her hands reaching up in a limping manner towards Black.
“I saw him once when I sneaked out the hospital, I saw him! I had to destroy him!”
“He was there, he was happy. He was snickering and yapping happily with his friends like the damned bastard he is!”
Black moved backwards, almost instantly when she saw the younger queen was too close. Black took a couple of step back. Black did not even remember that she had the ability to run at the speed of light, she just forgot it.
Her mind was drawing a blank, and no matter how much she wanted to try to think, her mind could not come up of any thoughts. She was dumbfounded at the shorter girl approaching her, even to the point where her eyes could not look away from the frail looking figure approaching her.
Black still tried to keep a safe distance away from Gekikara, away from the younger girl’s hands. The raven’s back unfortunately however met the cold hard wall, trapping herself with no way out when Gekikara placed both of her hands on both side of Black’s head.
“…You told me it’s wrong? Right, Black?” Gekikara brought her face close to Black’s and whispered in a hushed tone.
Both of the two teens were close together, and from an outsider’s perspective, they would probably think that the two were probably going to kiss, but they were not. Their faces were just inches apart from each other, bodies pressed close, but the tension was vividly present.
“G-Gekikara…” Black stuttered, feeling the younger girl’s warm breath tickling her face.
They were close.
Too close even that Black could feel Gekikara’s whole body on her’s, or how warm she is. What Black took notice the most was the younger queen’s shining brown orbs, which were unreadable, something that doesn’t normally happen since Gekikara was rather open in expressing her feelings through her eyes.
Black also did not forget to take notice of the shorter queen’s overall appearance.
Even though Gekikara’s appearance was that of the frail bookish girl she met in school two years ago at this current moment, this person in front of her was giving off a dangerous aura, an aura that she had always felt when she was still a student in Majisuka.
The aura was that of the dangerous and monstrous violent queen of Rappapa, the side of Matsui Rena that brought forth calamity in its wake.
Black knew immediately that Gekikara’s sanity from a while ago had snapped, and was now in her usual state of insanity and hazardous behavior.
In the flesh is the insane Gekikara.
“Hahaha…hehehe…ahahaha!”
Gekikara smiled almost annoyingly; her eyes half-lidded as she released a giggle. The younger teen pulled back one of her hands and brought it to her mouth, slowly biting her fingernails, making loud audible clicking sounds that pierced the remaining silence between the insane queen and the former queen of darkness.
“Say…Black, maybe it’s you who’s wrong?”
“Or maybe it’s something else…” The insane queen murmured darkly to herself. The large grin on her face was gone and was replaced by a sad scoffing expression.
“Tell me…”
“Do you love him?” Gekikara mumbled, almost as if pleadingly without even meaning to.
Gekikara did not even notice that she had stopped biting her fingernails and had placed them now on the wall. She did not even notice that she was making mixed expressions due to the onslaught of emotions that Black could not comprehend.
What Black could understand however was her question.
She found it odd as to why Gekikara would ask about that, much less think of that. The thought of it was almost sickening that Black wanted the shorter girl to stop, but Gekikara did not stopped.
“Is that why you don’t want me to destroy him?”
“Gekikara.”
“You do love him, don’t you?” Gekikara tilted her head sadly, her lips pursed in a tight line, her eyes staring straight into Black’s own charcoal colored eyes, searching, hoping and yet dreading that the other girl did felt that way.
“Stop it.” Black said uneasily under the insane queen’s searching eyes.
The raven automatically raised her hand, grasping the clothes beneath her chest, almost as if wanting to grasp a hold onto her heart. Her heart was painfully unsettled and was beating furiously inside her that Black just wanted to crush her own heart.
Black did not like the feeling that her heart was receiving; it was like being prickled by needles of who knows how much their amount was.
She hated the feeling of this kind of pain.
Her heart was hurting so much, desperately, almost pleadingly trying to catch her attention, making her want to relieve the painful ache in her chest but Gekikara made it hard for her when all her mind could process was the younger queen’s sorrowful voice.
“You love him right?”
“Hehehe… Right, right…” Gekikara glumly laughed, not even waiting for Black to reply as she said those words, almost convinced. The tone in her voice was obvious, she was in pain, disappointed and melancholic, her head kept shaking every now and then in her own self noted disappointment.
‘Why does my heart hurt so much…?’ Black asked herself in the back of her mind, almost silently. She did not even bother deny or clarify Gekikara’s answers. Her mind was too distraught between the pain that she felt in her heart and the pain that was dreadfully prickling her head that her mind did not even register the question that the younger queen uttered.
Gekikara of course took the former queen’s silence as an automatic agreement to her statement.
“You do love him…” The younger queen smiled sadly, she looked almost too heart clenching.
“G-Geki…kara…?” Black let out a pained hoarse mumble. The hand on her chest that was clenched tight slowly loosened its grasp. The raven gazed worriedly, almost a bit confused and oblivious why the other teen was making such a face. She did not even think that she might have been the cause.
Gekikara stood still; she helplessly closed her eyes tightly and let a small sniffle. She clenched both of her fists; she clenched them hard, as if wanting to hurt herself, almost as if wanting to draw out blood. Wanting, needing, and wishing that something could come to erase the depressing thoughts in her chaotic mind.
It hurts.
It hurts.Those words continued to repeat in Gekikara’s mind.
It hurts.
It hurts…so much.Those words continued, tormenting her already sullied damned soul.
Please, stop, it hurts…
The pain was too much. It was almost like her soul had been wrapped around with thorn stems of roses. She could almost hear her own voice hoarsely screaming and shouting those words in pain. Almost like what she had done in the past.
Gekikara wanted to open her eyes and look at Black, she wanted to see her, her heart pleading for the younger queen to see the older girl, but she was afraid to open her.
Gekikara’s eyelids started to falter, twitching every now and then, yet the younger queen kept her eyes shut.
Black would just see the despair and confusion that were apparent in her eyes. The raven teen would see, no, she would discover the hidden affections Gekikara desperately tried to bury underneath her childlike attitude and display of insanity.
The older girl would just reject her, she would find her disgusting, maybe even worst, Black would abandon her.
Right, who exactly would love someone like her?
She was all that all the other people thought of her. She did not care, or rather, she did not want to care about what they said, but the very thought that Black might as well say something like that to her was making her fear for the worst.
Disgusting.
Monstrous.
Sinful.
Unloved.
Unwanted.
That was her, that was Gekikara, and to an extent, the past her, Matsui Rena. That was what Gekikara’s or rather, Rena’s parents and relatives said.
She was the root of all the evils in their family. She was the black sheep. She was the plague.
No one would love a burden.
No one.
Her affections were hidden from view because of those very reasons.
She, as Matsui Rena, could never word out her love for the other girl, but as Gekikara, the insane monstrous queen, she could act affectionately under the guise of her childish attitude and mental problem.
That was the reason she acted absurdly. That was the reason why she sticks to Black, because everyone knew that Black acted like a guardian to her. That was also might have been the reason why Black takes care of her.
She is a tainted human: a devil, a coward and a liar.
She was taking advantage of this insanity. She was taking advantage of the lies that have already piled up for who knows how long.
Gekikara knew herself; she knew what she wanted, and she wanted Black, both by heart and body.
If Black were to belong with someone, she would not take it. It was hard to let go of her. She would not have any of that if it happens.
Even if that time is now.
Gekikara slowly opened her eyes and stared at Black in silence, admiring the raven’s ethereal beauty. This girl with her silent beauty, her lovely expressions and her cold deep voice, yes, this girl. This girl who had captured her heart.
Yes, that’s her.
That’s Black, the girl who unknowingly crept inside her heart and made a large special place in her once dead cold and grudge-holding heart.
“It’s not fair…” Gekikara whispered in a small trembling voice. She clenched her jaw, trying to stop herself from shaking, trying to stop herself from wanting to tear up.
“It’s not…fair.”
She drew a noticeable deep long breath before she slowly leaned forward to Black. Slowly, she withdrew her hands before encircling her arms around the raven’s slim waist, pulling her close into a tight embrace, startling Black due to the sudden gesture.
“Not fair…?”
“What…do you mean?”
Black blinked a couple of times in bewilderment and turned her head a little over to look at Gekikara, but alas, the younger girl’s face was hidden from view for the shorter queen had buried her face onto Black’s shoulders.
“…You won’t understand…” Gekikara mumbled in a small weak muffled voice.
The younger queen’s shoulder shook slightly ever so often, but Gekikara stood still, she did not let go. She did not break her contact with Black. The insane queen held onto Black, tighter and tighter, almost to the point of hurting her, and almost as if she was clinging for dear life.
“You won’t…”
Gekikara pulled herself from Black, almost too suddenly when she spoke those words.
It was odd. Black thought in worry, noticing that Gekikara had lost her luster; she was much more gloomier, which was really unusual, it was as if she was depressed, as if she was like her past self. The younger teen looked so much like a dejected child with her head bowed down, looking down ashamed and disgusted.
“I won’t understand anything if you don’t tell me.” Black said softly, her tone gentle, kind and motherly, her anger almost invisible, Black pushed away the anger that she still kept inside her and decided that the issues about the man and that was to be pushed aside and to be left forgotten.
Gekikara opened her mouth, before closing them back. She was tempted to say those words; she was tempted to let Black hear her about her affections and her worries. The raven’s words were too much convincing yet it was almost sickening to Gekikara’s gut how much the tone of Black’s voice was like of a cold sharp knife pressed onto her neck.
Seeing the shorter queen’s hesitation, Black tried to offer a comforting hand to Gekikara, yet Black herself was hesitant, her hands were trembling as she reached for the other queen. Gekikara somehow surprised her when she suddenly jolted at the slightest movement Black made before she looked up and stared at her with hazy darkened brown eyes.
“Are you–“ Black spoke, and was about to ask, but her words were suddenly cut when she felt hands grabbed her shoulders and her body pushed hard on the concrete wall. The raven let out a startled and pained gasp, her eyes automatically shut tightly when she felt the pain on her back.
It was surprising, everything happened fast. Black was caught off guard, she could not keep up with the suddenness. It just struck her. Black did not even had the time to react or to adjust herself from the pain.
Because the next thing happened, really gave Black the biggest surprise in her life.
It was unexpected and it felt foreign.
She felt something soft, warm and moist on her lips, gazing and pressing on her own cherry pink lips. Black gasped softly, too softly when she felt something warm and wet grazed her lips slightly before it parted her lips in ease.
Black felt breathless, she felt hot all of a sudden. She did not know these foreign feeling, and yet her body was accepting it, as if it knew what was intruding her, as if it knew what was exploring the cavern of her mouth, or how it suddenly grazed onto her own tongue.
Black’s eyes widened in reflex at the sudden stimuli she received. She did not meant it, but she opened her eyes and she saw something with her two crystal clear eyes.
Someone was in front of her.
Black’s expression morphed quickly into a startled and flabbergasted expression.
Too close.
Too close.Gekikara was too close to her that the distance between them was no longer present.
Too close that they were in fact…kissing.
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End of Part III
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A/N: That ends Part III of Chinmoku, I'm sorry if its long and also for being an evil writer and cutting off the scene. A cliffhanger is a cliffhanger, I actually like cutting the scenes.
Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this part..... Part IV will come up next, maybe next week? I wonder if this shot will end there though, I'm not entirely sure. I wouldn't call this a one-shot anymore, given how much many the parts are now. Aw... X3"
I also decided not to add BlackGeki's past, maybe in some other shot so that I can give much more focus on it. It would be bad if I don't give their past some good focus after all... I kind of like the idea that's formulating in my head. :3
EDIT: (Omg...I'm really clumsy sometimes.... Just edited something. Uwah...)