Wow, I feel like I'm causing everyone a trauma
CHAPTER 6I haven’t decided what I want to be yet.
Dreamer or realistic
Just a few days ago I would have asked this to Eri, but now I guess that I have to think it by myself.
I would love to be a dreamer, that way I would have hope enough to think that she will come back soon, or to think that this situation will change. But my common sense always says that I should forget about her existence.
But to forget her is impossible for me…
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“Ah, Tanakacchi, morning!” Wow, her best friend will be kilometres away for a long time, and she’s so cheerful?
“Good morning…” I say trying to hide my sadness.
“How are you? You haven’t come to the rehearsals for two days…” She says observing me.
“I’m fine Risa, thanks…”
“You don’t have to hide how you really feel to me, Reina.”
“What do you mean?”
“Come on. We both know why you weren’t here these two last days…”
“Well, I can say the same, don’t you think? Why do you act so cheerful? When we all know that you’re all sad in the reality…” I say coldly.
“I have to continue…” She says sternly as that annoying tone disappears. “And you too, Reina, you have to continue without her…”
She stares at me for over a minute while we’re in silence, but Ai calls her and she leaves. I watch them briefly. Ai says something to her and Risa starts to giggle and gives Ai a quick peck. I feel even more alone right now… When I was sad Eri was always there for me.
Wait a minute, Gaki has just told me that I should forget about Eririn and continue my life without her… How ironic, I’d never thought that Risa would be the one saying this. Well, this is one point to the realism.
However, I watch these two talking the other day…
“Eririn… you really want to go? Is this what you really want?”
“How many times I’ve got to say that I don’t really have another option? Of course I don’t want this, but well, I believe that a time in Korea is not going to be that bad, haha.”
“Eri, please, this is serious, don’t start to laugh…”
“And what do you want me to do Risa? If I don’t laugh, I’ll cry… I want to stay here… but I can’t!”
“Damn! Kamei! You can stay! Don’t say that you can’t! You’re going because you don’t want to face the problems, and that’s all!”Risa… she knows why she has left. But of course she won’t tell me the real reason…
These two are always so confident in each other… If Eri hasn’t told me why she was leaving, she probably said Risa to keep in silence. And Gaki has got a lot of qualities, one of them is her loyalty to Kamei…
“Tanaka.”
“Oh, hi Tsunku-san.” What is he doing in the dance room? He’s always in his office trying to pretend that he is busy… but we all now that he is doing nothing.
“I have to talk with you.” He seems really pissed off. “And it’s serious.”