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Author Topic: Nogizaka46 One-Shots || Morning Blues [21/02/18]  (Read 1630 times)

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Nogizaka46 One-Shots || Morning Blues [21/02/18]
« on: September 11, 2017, 03:11:03 AM »
:welcome After considering several people advise I decided to start a new topic exclusively for my one-shots. This way I would be able to check on it easier. It will also be more distinguishable  :hee:
So without a further ado, here is the first one

Then, Nishino Nanase found the answer to her question.

She has never heard music in her life, could only imagine how beautiful it must be with all the note forming up a harmony. She used to ask her parents a lot about it, how does it sound like? And they would try to explain as much as they can, but their explanation is never enough for her as it will only make her brain work to form another question. In the end, she realised she will never fully comprehend it because it’s something that people hear instead of see.

However, dance is different, it’s not meant to be heard, but instead, it’s meant to be seen. Every single step, twirl, and emotion of a dance deliver the meaning of music to Nishino’s spectating eyes.

And just like that, she had found the answer that she has been asking for several almost entire years in her life of silence.

When it comes to a song she could only imagine how beautiful the music is, but she doesn’t have to do that when it comes to a dance. Nishino found herself fascinated as she started to get interested in watching more TV shows with a dance in it, as she saves her money to watch performances, as she started to notice that near her home there’s a place where some girls often gather to practice their moves.

Never in her life, she had even dared to hope that one day she would be able to join them.

Yet somehow she did.

Then, Nishino Nanase made some friends.

It wasn’t easy. Even though she goes to the school for the deaf where she is surrounded with people going through the same thing, she has never found herself fit to continue a conversation, in the end, people only talk to her when it comes to school stuff and maybe just for a quick greeting.

To make it even worse, her parents had even specially asked someone to be her friend. For a moment that happened without her awareness until the day she found out that the reason for the friend huge collection of sneakers is a thank you gifts from Nishino’s very own mother.

After that Nishino pretty much have her guard up all the time, mostly feeling bothered whenever someone tries to get to know her, afraid that in the end, the person’s reason is exactly what she has in mind.

Nevertheless, the girls from Nogizaka dance club are different. They are not even people with disabilities, just a bunch of normal teenagers having fun while trying to work their way to win a dance competition. Yet they genuinely welcome her with an open arm, despite how it could hinder them from winning.

She has never forgotten the day where Shiraishi Mai- the group most beloved person tried to approach her when she was trying to put the girl’s dance move into sketches. It was so sudden that she abruptly closed her sketch book and took few steps away.

She has always remembered how Shiraishi’s eyes were widened as she was taken aback by Nishino’s way of communicating with gestures. Knowing that it might just add more into the awkward tension if she continues, Nishino gave the girl a weak smile before turning on her back and walk away.

She had wondered if the girl still tried to call her after that, it wouldn’t be surprising if she did remembering that Shiraishi is not exactly the smartest person in the earth and Nishino couldn’t blame her either. Yet somehow her failing to understand that she wouldn’t be able to hear her calls is one of the reasons Nishino likes her a lot.

Usually, normal people tried not to bother themselves with her, totally understandable since they will actually need to use sign language to communicate, which is something that people normally can’t do and even Nishino realise how bothersome it is to learn that when you could say something out loud.

However, they are different. None of them knows any sign language before yet they tried to learn that. They genuinely want to be Nishino’s friend. Little by little she started to get to know them better.

Nogizaka dance group has always treated Nishino like she’s normal. As if there’s no communication obstacle within them. It doesn’t take her long to be able to get along with them as she started to spend more and more time with them, even to the point of joining their dance practice and putting her name on the competition form, officially making her part of the group.

There wasn’t even a second where they give Nishino a look of disdain upon her incapability of following the music like everyone else. Not before her parents told her that they are moving to New York she look back and realises how much they mean to her.

They have just gotten to know each other in less than 2 months, but Nishino feels like she knows them better than those people who are already in the same class with her since she was young.

Nevertheless, she still doesn’t have the heart to tell her parents about her problem, she knows that her father wouldn’t even think twice to turn down the offer if it will make her happy, but she doesn’t want to do that.

Accepting that they will move doesn’t mean that she is not sad. The night when she decided that she’s going to follow her parents, she sent all the people in the group an email, saying how thankful she is for an opportunity to join them even if it’s just for short time, how she is happy that they have accepted them for what she is, how she is sorry that she wouldn’t be able to join the competition with them.

The next day she dropped by their dance studio, it was still empty as she was early but that’s exactly what she’s aiming for. She pranced around from several minutes before neatly put down her group t-shirt along with a message written in a letter that she put on top of it.

She decided to stop coming to the practice, considering that she would never be able to come to the competition anyway so if she comes all she would ever do is to be another burden.

However, this doesn’t seem to stop them, every day even sometimes twice a day they would come to her house, asking her to hang out together.

There’s nothing that she wants more than to say yes. However, she realizes that it will only make her heart ache more, giving her a second thought about her decision.

So, Nishino Nanase waves her hand in rejection, leaving them with disappointment as they left her house.

She didn’t cry until the night before the competition. As if the weather reflects her gloomy heart, it was raining that night and she tried to keep her mind busy by doodling in her sketchbook. That’s when she realises that she has received a message in her phone. It was a short one from Ikuta saying that she needs to look outside.

Nishino stood up from where she was sitting and opened her balcony door. Her eyes widened when she sees the white shirt that she designed together with Shiraishi, hanging on a tall pole which escalated from the ground beneath her. She looks down and found three of her closest friend there waving their hands as if standing there wouldn’t get her attention.

“What’s wrong?” Hashimoto Nanami asked in a sign language, her short hair seems to blend with the dark jacket that she’s wearing. Again, Ikuta pushed the pole a little bit towards the balcony, urging her to take the white shirt stuck on it.

However, Nishino shook her head with an apologetic smile as she gently pushed the pole away.

“I’m not going to compete,” She gestured, hoping that it’d be enough to make them turn their back and go home. From above she could see Hashimoto was looking at Shiraishi who in turn gives her a troubled look as her mouth moved to say something. From her eyes, Nishino could tell that there are a lot of things the girl wants to talk about, however, since she is in covering Ikuta’s with umbrella there’s not much she can do.

“That doesn’t matter. This is still yours.”

Again, Nishino shook her head, while holding back her tears she signed, “good luck with the competition. Goodbye.”

After that she decided to come back inside, she doesn’t want them to see her cry, she doesn’t want them to be worried about her. She had thought to go back to doodling but she realised that there’s nothing she wants to do more than curled up on her bed and cry.

So she did.

Then, Nishino Nanase found out she is in love.

To tell the truth, she doesn’t even know when did it start, but once she realises she has fallen in love with her. She wasn’t just observing her to copy the dance move anymore, she wasn’t just simply admire her, there was more to that.

She had started to notice some little things about the other girl, how after their first encounter the girl always tried to avoid touching her shoulder to get her attention. How much she’s actually struggling to learn the sign language, yet always tried to do her best on it. How it seems like her eyes are sparkling to reflect the night sky on each evening after their practice. How she always offered to walk her home after their practice.

Quickly the time that they spent together grow bigger and bigger each day, when before they only hang out in practice and a little bit after that, now has become almost every single minute where they have nothing else to do. They even texted until late at night, something that is unusual for Nishino since she usually avoid phone as she is not able to hear the notification sound when a text is coming.

Shiraishi Mai. Nishino has always wonder how her name will sounds, for she had never heard anything in her entire life. It’s amazing how the sound of one person name has become something she long for, she could even say that she wants to hear it as much as she wants to hear the music.

One day, after they finished their practice and was walking side by side, they were having one of their meaningless talk about a lot of stuff and they have gotten to the topic where Shiraishi is started to elaborate on her dream.

“When- I was young I used to dream of being a singer,” she signed.

Nishino raised her eyebrows, wasn’t expecting that to be her wish, “What made you change your mind?”

Shiraishi gives her a look before taking out the little book of sign language dictionary that she has been carrying around in her pocket. She opened several pages flipping it back and forth for twice before continuing, “I took vocal classes. Realised that I’m not good.”

“How so?”

“There are people,” Shiraishi halted after that and opened her dictionary once more, “people better than me. Have no chance.”

Nishino was lost in thought, she wanted to convey that maybe it’s not true. However, it’s meaningless because she has never heard people voice in her life before. Still, there is one thing that she wants the other girl to know, “I don’t know about other people, but I believe you have a beautiful voice.”

She only realized how embarrassing that was after she finished. However, Shiraishi looked at her in confusion, “Sorry. I didn’t catch what you were saying? Other people what?”

Nishino contemplates whether she should try to explain it or not and decided to do the latter by simply shook her head and gave the other girl a ‘nevermind’ sign, earning a look of curiosity from the other girl. Thankfully she decided to let it go and averted the topic to something else.

About two days after that the group had asked her to design the shirt for them to wear at the competition. Nishino was surprised and wanted to reject the offer because she has never done such thing before, while it’s true that she likes to draw but this kind of design is not something light. However, Shiraishi’s hand reach her shoulder, while her other hand signing her support on the matter.

To think about it that’s unfair, while it’s hard enough to not fall into the other girl’s hopeful look there’s no way Nishino will have the heart to turn down that girl. So, after several seconds of silence with everyone looking at her with a face full of expectation she nodded. This soon followed by a bright smile on everyone in the room as if she’s their saviour.

It’s not until she was walking home with Shiraishi she finally managed to admit that she still has no idea on what to put for their shirt design.

She had expected the girl to get mad at her for agreeing to such thing while having no idea what to do, or at least she had expected the girl to look at her in disappointment. None of it happened.

Instead, Shiraishi looks up towards the early evening sky, seemingly lost in thought. Several minutes later she signed, “I have no idea either but I want to help.”

Somehow that ended up into Shiraishi visiting her place. She had no idea how long has it been since she had a friend over, not to mention it was abrupt, even her mother was surprised though seem so happy that she managed to bring a friend over. The woman excitedly talked to Shiraishi, which kind of bothered Nishino because she couldn’t hear nor understand any of their voice based conversation.

In the end, she dragged Shiraishi into her room as she told her mother that the older girl came to work on their design project instead of normal chit-chat.

So, there they were, sitting side by side, trying to came-up for an idea. Nonetheless, two hours have passed and the only thing Nishino has done is realising how the other girl is not exactly a good painter. Which she somehow finds as cute, since the girl doesn’t seem to be bothered with it at all and still excitedly doodling her weird ideas and shown every single thing to her.

Then Nishino realises maybe they need to approach the concept another way, instead of thinking what a good symbolism for their group she needs to think about what describes their group the most. She asked Shiraishi about this and the girl seems to realised it as well.

What describes their group the most? What makes it special for Nishino? This group is the first one who will extend their hand to her, accepting her for what she is.

Nishino started doodling.

It doesn’t even take her 15 minutes to finish it, a clean drawing of two hands holding each other. She shown it to Shiraishi, who looks at it in pure delight, she wasn’t even started to explain the meaning yet for the girl to approve it with her two thumbs up. Deep down she knows that without needing the explanation Shiraishi understands well what the design is trying to convey.

She remembers how heavy she felt when she realised that it was time for the older girl to go home, back then there was nothing else she wanted more than to ask her to stay the night, however, she knows that the other girl needs to rest well, so she bid her farewell. However, before she left Shiraishi asked her whether she has plans for that weekend and invite her for a day out. Of course, Nishino nodded in the excitement which got a smile out of the other girl before she gestured the second ‘see you’ and left.

Happily, Nishino marked her wall calendar, grinning as she drawn a little heart symbol beside the future plan. After that she observed the calendar, wondering when did she start to get an idea to draw little heart whenever Shiraishi asked her to go out, something that she couldn’t recall.

Two days after that, their shirts are finished, all the girls in the group seem to be happy with her work as they couldn’t stop praising her with a look full of gratefulness. Shiraishi raised one of her hand, a signal for Nishino to do a high five with her. And with a wide smile she did.

Time seems to pass quickly until the day where Shiraishi had asked to hang out with her. However, unlike how they usually did it this time the girl had actually come to her house to pick her up. She could imagine how her face grown red when she opened the door and find the girl there looking as beautiful as always with a plain white t-shirt that has some words on it tucked into her long colourful skirt, a pitch-black choker necklace contrasting her white skin and a dark leather jacket to finish the look.

Before that time, she had only seen the girl tied her hair in a ponytail on dance practice, but this time she did it.

Seeing how she has been staring for minutes Shiraishi started to look on her attire in confusion, thinking that she might wear something wrong. Nishino stopped her and signed, “you look beautiful.”

The other girl blushed as she tried not to look away in embarrassment, she politely looks past her to where her mother is standing and seems to be asking for her permission before the latter nodded and Shiraishi cheerfully gestured “let’s go.”

They went to the city, going from one café to another as Shiraishi cheerfully shown her favourite place in the area. It’s not until few hours passed when Nishino realised that it’s the first time they have ever truly gone out just for the two of them. Usually, there is someone else from their group, but this time it’s only her and Shiraishi.

Does it mean that this outing is different? Does it mean that this is a real date?

Think about it, right now after the 3rd café that they went they decided to take a stroll along one of the parks in the city, gazing at the fallen leaves of autumn filling the pathways. Shiraishi had spent some penny on pigeon food and now on the lookout to spot some of them.

The activity is one of her favourite thing to do whenever she went to the park with her family, she thinks that they’re cute, the pigeons, especially the fat ones. That’s probably why until this day she had never actually spent more time observing the person who’s feeding the birds instead of the actual birds.

With a smile that rarely leaves her face throughout the whole day, Shiraishi scattered the pigeon's food around the ground and watch excitedly as the pigeons started to flock to eat them. She offered Nishino to feed the birds too, which of course she did and ended up getting occupied by the pack of birds, they quickly dispersed once the foods are gone but then Nishino noticed that Shiraishi has been using her phone camera to keep the interaction in memory.

“I’m sorry. Are you mad?” She signed quickly as soon as she realises that Nishino has been paying attention to her activity. However, Nishino shook her head, trying not to blush from the thought of Shiraishi keeping her picture in the phone.

Shiraishi again motioned something that could be read as two and camera, however, Nishino failed to grasp the meaning. The girl frowned a bit as she tried to think of another way to convey what’s on her mind, and ended up pointing at her, herself and the camera of the phone.

“Take a picture together? Sure,” Nishino gestured as the girl come closer to her, to the point of breaching her normally personal space. They were just done checking every picture that she took after it’s done, assuring that everything looks good for her to keep when Shiraishi suddenly took her right hand in hers.

Her mouth moved to say something before halfway stopped upon realising that Nishino doesn’t understand anything. Then she let go of her hand as she pointed at herself and then Nishino.

“I – love – you,” she signed as her mouth moving along with her movement, Nishino was still shocked from the sudden development of situation could only stare in silence. Shiraishi take this as her cue to explain further, “more than a friend.”

That was the first confession Nishino Nanase has ever received and she felt nothing but confusion, what should she say next? Should she tell her that she actually love her too? But what will come after that? Will someone like her enough for Shiraishi?

Before her mind could formulate the best answer Shiraishi did another gesture, “you don’t need to say anything. I just want to let you know.”

Nishino feels devastated as she actually wanted to say something. However, she could understand if the girl doesn’t want an answer, perhaps deep down she is also scared of what might happen if Nishino had actually answered.

Shiraishi smiled sadly, despite of how she had prevent her to answer disappointment is still clearly prominent in her features, “Do you want to go home now?”

That’s more of a statement than a question because without hearing her answer that’s where their foot is leading them to and none of them had the courage to change their mind about it. Nishino gaze downward to the pavement, suddenly feeling cold because Shiraishi seems to be keeping their distance farther than she usually does.

The same thing happened when they’re riding the train back. Since it was crowded Shiraishi give Nishino the only chair left as she stood a few feet away from her even though the standing space next to her is available.

Not until they finally stood in front of her house, both wondering how did the day go wrong that Shiraishi finally motioned something to her. “Sorry, for what happened. It was a nice day.”

Nishino shook her head, realising how wrong the situation is, Shiraishi doesn’t need to feel sorry at all. If anything it’s her who should be sorry for making the situation awkward.

“I have fun. I really do,” she gestured as her lips curled into a smile, she hesitated for a moment, her hands hanging in front of her as she struggled with herself to let out what’s in her mind or not. Then she took a deep breath before taking a step forward, quickly getting closer before finally engulfing the other girl in a tight hug.

The girl’s leather jacket feels strange and cold on her skin. However, once the girl finally dared to raise her arms and hug her back it feels like there’s nothing compares to this, as if this is meant to be. As if their body is meant to be this close to each other.

Nishino felt nothing but disappointment when the girl started to move away from her touch, however, she wasn’t even able to use her hand to voice her dissatisfaction when the older girl caresses her cheek with her soft white skin and close the distance between their lips until there’s nothing separate them at all.

The way Shiraishi clashed her lips onto hers was rough despite the softness of her lips and a careful touch of her hand on her cheek. It tastes a little bit like strawberry, probably from the expensive looking lip gloss the girl has that she had seen a couple of times. She had no idea how many seconds have passed and Shiraishi's lips is still not leaving hers and in every second passed the more forceful and demanding the girl has become.

Suddenly the girl jolted back and took a step back from her, leaving Nishino fazed from what just happened. Her finger finds their way up to touch the lips that have been touched by the girl’s lips merely a second ago. Shiraishi expression was unreadable, not because she couldn’t find the meaning of it but because it is showing so many emotions at once. Happiness, warmth, sadness, regrets, is not even enough to describe her interpretation of the other girl expression.

“Your mother,” she motioned and pointed to the door behind Nishino. Nishino’s eyes widened as her brain hoping that her mom wasn’t there when the kiss had happened, the last thing she wanted is to trouble Shiraishi by having her mom started to interrogate the girl.

Nishino looks behind her and found her mom moving her mouth, the expression seems as friendly as always, a good sign that she didn’t witness the occurrence a few seconds ago. Shiraishi bowed politely to the older woman as her expression is back to her normally composed one and started to speak, their conversation didn’t last long as Shiraishi shook her head and bowed once more. She gave Nishino a polite apologetic smile before motioning a simple “see you later.”

It’s not before she went inside with her mom closing the door behind her as she took off her shoes she realises that it was her first kiss. Again, her finger went up to touch her lips, wondering if it is swollen because the numbness that she’s currently experiencing. She went straight to the toilet to check it and find that it looks normal. She exhaled as she splashed some cold water onto her face, hoping that it’d help her to get a grip of herself.

That night, she had checked her phone every 5 minutes, hoping that Shiraishi had sent her a text. However, there’s none. The girl was also not responding to the discussion on the group, which is unusual for her. Nishino wondered if she should send her a text to check up on her and ended up going against it and opt to change into their group new shirt and started to practise their dance.

That was the time when both of her parents suddenly came into her room, both looking more excited and happy than always. Her mom with a wide smile on her lips motioned, “we have a good news to tell you.”

Nishino raised her eyebrows in confusion, her brain couldn’t form a possible outcome of the situation. Seemingly impatient to wait for her to guess her father finally gave in and excitedly gestured, “we are moving to New York!”

New York is their dream, it is where her father would be able to get a better income and work at the division that he has been pursuing for years. It is where her mother has been planning to open a restaurant, with a money that she has been saving for years even back to the days when she wasn’t born yet. It is also where she- Nishino Nanase will be able to pursue a better education for her interest in arts.

If this were to happen 2 months ago, she’d be jumping up and down in delight. However, things have taken a turn to a different path. She couldn’t even feel happy anymore as if she had somewhere thrown that dream of her away. While faking a smile, she started to move her hand, “when are we going?”

“On 26,” her mom replied, “this month, 26.”

As if the situation couldn’t turn even worse it is exactly the date where the dance competition will commence.

She couldn’t really remember what kind of conversation she had with her parents afterward. However, she remembered that after they finally left her room, she went to the other side to cross the word ‘competition’ from her wall calendar and put ‘move to NY’ on it.

She remembered muffling her own cries with her pillow because she knows that her crying could easily be identified and heard and she doesn’t want her parents to finds out about that. She remembered crying herself to sleep after she sent every member of the group an email of her resignation from the competition and the group altogether.

She didn’t bother to reply all the questions that they asked about their sudden leave, but she read them one by one, her heart feeling warm upon noticing that they actually care about her. On the next day, she left her shirt on the dance studio, thinking that maybe they will be able to find someone else who is interested in filling her position.

From that day forward they have been trying to visit her at home. She was lucky that her mother was too busy to prepare themselves to move that she didn’t really notice how she always turn them down every time they had come and demanded some answers.

However, not until that night she had ever seen Shiraishi Mai again. The girl is actually the only one who didn’t reply anything upon her resignation statement, she is also the only one who didn’t come to her house and demand answers.

And suddenly she was there. Standing beneath the umbrella, under the rain, looking at her with a troubled expression as she let Hashimoto do all the conversation with her. Nishino had actually expected the girl to step up and try to strike a conversation with her because it looks like she really wants to do so when Nishino refuses Hashimoto attempt to get her take back her shirt.

But she never did.

Once they finally turn they back and started to walk back, Nishino had also gone back inside, she had finally given in to tears as they started to well beneath her eyes.

It hurts.

Her silence hurts her so much yet she doesn’t even know what does she want from the girl. Wasn’t she the one who was reluctant from the first place? Was she the one who hurt her first from not responding upon her confession? Why it seems like she could feel nothing but regret, even though it will even hurt them more if they had ever actually gotten together and got caught up in the situation she is in now.

After curling up on her bed and cried for some period of time, she went to the bathroom, trying to wash her face out of any sign that tears were there, trying to give herself a smile to assure her that it was the best for both of them.

Pathetic is the best word to describe how she feels toward herself by then.

She was thinking to go to sleep as soon as possible when she notices that her phone screen has been flashing. She refused to even check what is it about and crawl into her bed instead, but after about an hour being wide awake with her mind nowhere but her phone she realised that reading it would probably be the best.

Turns out for the first time after their bittersweet date she had finally gotten a message from Shiraishi Mai. Not one but five.

I need to tell you something.

I’m outside.

Can we please talk for a moment?


It doesn’t matter how long it took, I will wait here. Take your time.

Nishino looks outside where the rain had actually gotten worse from the last time she was on the balcony, without thinking more she stood up and started to run the opposite way from where the balcony is, coming out from her bedroom and down the stairs. Swiftly she snatched the door keys from the hanger and an umbrella, trying to work as quickly as she can to open the door that would lead her outside.

As if the glass of her balcony door was playing trick with her eyes the rain was actually heavier than what she thinks she saw just a few second ago, the strong wind kind of makes it impossible to stay dry despite the umbrella. And in the middle of her front yard, exactly where she was with her two other friends about three hours ago, the girl was standing as she looks up to where Nishino’s room is.

She wasn’t even sure that the girl had already noticed her presence when she grabbed her freezing arm and guide her inside. She can feel the girl shaking as she guides her upstairs to where her room is, not even bother to make a conversation with her as she realises that it can wait.

Once they’re finally inside her room, Nishino opened one box that is filled with all the clothing and stuff that they will leave in Japan, quickly grabbed a towel and a set of fresh clothes for the other girl.

Shiraishi was looking down to the floor when Nishino tried to give her the clothes, her hands hugging herself in an attempt to keep some warm for her body. However, instead of taking the clothes, her shaking hands started to move in a motion, “I am sorry.”

Nishino shook her head, feeling that she doesn’t need the apology since it wasn’t Shiraishi’s fault. She held out the clothes, silently half-forcing the girl to take it. After several seconds Shiraishi gave in and take the clothes as Nishino stood up and motioned that she is going to go downstairs for a moment to give Shiraishi a space to change.

She decided to make the girl a hot chocolate and as she waited for the water to boiled she wondered about how long the girl has been standing there in the rain, she felt nothing but terrible for refusing to read the message earlier.

Once she’s back upstairs the girl has changed into one of her old hoodie and jogging pants which she thought is going to be helpful enough to restore the girl body heat, she sat curled up near the balcony, quickly wiped the tears from her eyes upon noticing her coming from the door.

Nishino hands her the warm glass and carefully observe as the girl signed a thank you and took a sip of it, noticing how the bag under her eyes are swollen red from crying as she tried her best to control her shaking to steady her grip on the glass.

“It is not your fault,” Nishino motioned once the girl finally dared to look up onto her long enough, “I am moving to New York tomorrow. That’s why I left.”

The girl furrowed her eyebrows probably finding difficulties on matching the words she just signed with what she has learned and remembered. Realising this Nishino came up with easier way to explain, she grabbed her phone from her desk and started to type, making sure she already explained clearly before showing the screen to Shiraishi.
My family is moving to New York tomorrow. That’s why I can’t join you in the competition. It is not your fault, it never was. If anything, I’m in love with you too.

A part of Nishino feel sad that she had told the girl about how she felt only with words typed in a phone, while it’s true that it is impossible for her to say it out loud, she had wanted to tell her without any help from a device.

Shiraishi looked at her in disbelieves, she seemed not to realise the tears that have start to run through her cheek once more, Nishino gave her an assuring smile and reach out her hand to wipe the girl’s tears, “I don’t want you to be sad.”

She knows that is really selfish knowing that herself is also really sad. However, she couldn’t stand to see the older girl hurting. The tears that she shed makes it harder for her to stop herself from crying in front of the girl.

Nishino Nanase is a weak girl who cried easily, but when it comes to Shiraishi Mai, she doesn’t want to do so, she wants her to be able to lean on her, she wants to be strong as she knows that the girl has always been the one who tried to stand strong. So, she took a deep breath and shook the tears away.

Somehow, she found a courage to come closer and gave the other girl a chaste kiss on where the tears were. This somehow had only made it worse. She wiped the tears again before hugging Shiraishi, letting her press her forehead onto her collarbones. Her fingers gently pat the girl back, sometimes brushing into the girl hair which is still wet from the rain.

Nishino has always loved reading manga. In some of the stories, a person would try to comfort the other when they’re crying by giving them a hug, letting them cry out as they voice out how it is going to be okay.
All Nishino could do is the former two.

Not before that moment, her disability has ever caused her so much pain. As she let the girl let out her sadness, Nishino wonder about the time and she suddenly realise that Shiraishi has a competition in the morning. The girl needs as much rest as she can to be able to give the best performance, all of this crying and shivering because of the rain could make her caught a cold.

Nishino pulled away from their hug, her hands that were on the girls back raised up to the damp towel on her shoulder, pulling it up so it covers the girl hair before she gently caresses the hair with it. As her hands work to dry the girl's hair, Shiraishi grabbed the mug beside her once more and took a sip, for a moment Nishino halted, making sure the girl is okay before continuing.

Both of her hands were on either side of the girl’s head, softly she wiped a strand of stray hair away revealing the girl’s face. Even when her eyes are puffy and red from crying, her nose is runny, hair half dried and messy, Shiraishi Mai is still beautiful Nishino smiled upon realising this as Shiraishi after a moment dared to look at her seemingly confused when she noticed the smile on her lips.

In that moment, Nishino suddenly got the urge to kiss her.

So, she did.

Their second kiss is different from their first kiss. Perhaps because Nishino is the one who initiates this one, she came closer slowly, stopped when they were just a few inches away from each other, her vision wandered around Shiraishi's lips for a second before moving up to meet her eyes, as if she’s asking for a permission. After locking eyes with each other for the time that seems like an eternity, she finally leaned forward, pressing her lips onto Shiraishi’s softly, despite her crying tremble slowly Shiraishi kissed her back, unlike their first kiss, this time she’s more gentle and patient. As if the Nishino can break if she put too much force.

Their second kiss is not exactly how Nishino always imagine a kiss would be, the kiss is much better than that, empowering the subtle taste of Shiraishi’s lip gloss is a strong taste of chocolate feeling her senses, both of them were careful as they try to make it last as long as possible, only taking a break to fill their lungs with air every now and then.

She could feel Shiraishi's mouth curled upwards as the girl raised both of her hands to cup her face, pulling her closer to deepen their kiss.

Their kiss is similar to their dance, each of them doing their part without the need to battle the others, lips and tongue moving as if there’s a harmony that directs them. While it last, it feels like an eternity but once it’s done it feels like a second hasn’t even passed. Shiraishi wipes Nishino’s bangs aside and moves up to kiss her forehead, letting her lips stay there for a while before finally let her go.

“I don’t want to leave you.” She motioned to Nishino, her eyes wandered to the rainy sky outside. Nishino realises that the girl will have to go home in heavy rain and decided that it’s best if she stays for the night. There will be a couple of hours to spare in the morning before she has to go to the competition and that might be enough for her to go back home and prepare.

“Stay,” Nishino moved her hand to tell her and Shiraishi didn’t seem to think twice before nodding.

Because of her house situation it is not possible for her to prepare the girl the guest futon as it is probably somewhere inside one of the big boxes in the living room that is not meant to be opened anymore. There’s no way Nishino would let the girl sleep on the floor so the only choice is her bed which is quite big for a single bed so it shouldn’t be a problem.

It’s good thing is that Shiraishi didn’t question her as she leads her to the bed patting the empty space beside her as a signal for her to use. Nishino pull up the blanket for both of them, making sure that it should be warm enough for Shiraishi who was just out in the rain and still shivering every now and then.

They lay down facing each other. Nishino wonders if they would ever do this again sometime later, even the chance for them to reunite is low. Nishino scooted closer and once she is sure that the girl is okay with it she presses her forehead onto Shiraishi’s shoulder, in return, the girl kiss her forehead as if to assure her she doesn’t mind and circle her arm around her.

She remembered waking up and find herself still secured with Shiraishi’s arm spread across her waist, because of their position she could feel the girl stable breathing giving a serene feeling on their surrounding. It is so calm and peaceful that Nishino doesn’t feel like moving to check the time, however, she knows that the day is important for both of them, so gently she removed the girl’s arm and sit up to see the clock on the wall.

As if on cue her mother opened the room door and looks surprised to see another presence in the room, she smiled softly before gesturing, “breakfast is ready, ask Shiraishi-san to come too.”

Nishino nodded and the women close the door, perhaps the sounds were loud Shiraishi started to stir as well. For a moment, their eyes met before Nishino smiled as a good morning greeting, Shiraishi smiled back as her eyes moved to check the time.

“I need to go home now,” she motioned as she gets out from the bed and took her damp clothes that she had folded neatly on the desk, her smile has dispersed as she looks at her in sadness, “what time are you going to leave the town?”

“1 PM,” she answered, feeling sad as she remembers that there’s no way Shiraishi will be able to come to send her off. The group is going to perform at 12.30, once they’re done Nishino would already be leaving.

“It’s okay to take my clothes, yours is still damp,” Nishino added, earning a little smile from the girl as she stepped closer to her and gave her a quick hug.

Nothing else was exchanged between them as Shiraishi was rushing to go home, she can see the girl is worried that she’d be late to competition which is good because that’s what Nishino wants her to focus on more and once she has left Nishino went to the dining room and found her parents looking at her.

“Is Shiraishi-san going to join us?”
her mom motioned.

Nishino shook her head and explained, “she has dance competition today.”

Their parents looks at each other before nodded and continue their breakfast, not before her father has finally finished what’s on his plate he asked her, “are you ready to go?”

Nishino nodded in return, hoping she would look convincing enough despite what how heavy her heart felt.

After that, they started to get ready and because she was really caught up with it her mind could actually leave the matter of competition and Shiraishi. It took them less than two hours to get everything ready and once her mind finally unoccupied with all the moving stuff it drifted back to the competition. She is already in the car. Her suitcase has been neatly packed and placed in the trunk along with some other boxes that they decided to bring with them instead of sending it with a courier. She wasn’t even paying attention when the car started to drive away, separating her from the house where she had grown up in.

It was about 15 minutes before they train arrived when she started to look back at the life that she will leave soon. She had regrets, a lot of them, however, she cherished every single bit of it. She tried not to tear up when she realised she hadn’t given a proper goodbye to her friends, the true friends she has been looking for in such a long time and once she finally gained them she lost them quickly. She hadn’t even bid a goodbye to Shiraishi, the girl was in a rush that she basically left with nothing but a smile and quick hug. In her mind, she somehow suspects that is what the girl intended, she tried to avoid shedding a tear from real goodbye.

She hadn’t even noticed that she had cried before the sensation of a drop of water running through her cheek hits her. Her mother pats her shoulder a couple of times, seemingly wanting to check up on her, Nishino wiped her tears quickly and return the woman gaze, the woman smiled softly and pointed behind.

Nishino turn back to see what her mother is trying to show her and catch the sight of her full groupmates standing just beside the station, Shiraishi stood in the centre a few step ahead than the others, shouting something that she, of course, couldn’t hear.

Her mother has walked to talk to the man who stood in the ticketing machine, after a moment the guy nodded and let the girls enter the station.

What comes afterward was pretty much a blur, she remembered seeing them running towards her and engulf her in a tight group hug, a lot of hands patted her back and shoulder, some even tried to give her a pat on the head which probably going to mess her hair.

It took them a few minutes before finally stepping back, all smiling at her.

The first thing Nishino mentioned is what she deemed the most trivial, it is the thing that supposed to hold them back from coming by now, “what about the competition?”

“Our member is more important,”
Hashimoto gestured in reply and nodded to Fukagawa who stood beside her, the older girl smiled and step forward, giving Nishino the thin shopping bag that she has been carrying. She took a peek to see what’s inside and could see a glimpse of a white shirt. Her shirt.

“Please accept that. No matter what you are still a member,” Ikuta gestured, making Nishino teared up in happiness as she nodded.

“I am sorry for not explaining this before. Thank you for coming, for everything. I’m glad to be able to join, even if it’s just for short time,”
Nishino motioned, she wiped her tears once more before finishing her statement, “Goodbye.”

They are all nodded and motioned the same goodbye sign to her. Well, all but Shiraishi, the girl only look at her with eyes started to water. Knowing that it might be the time for her to say what she wanted to say she took a step forward and motioned.

“If you don’t mind. Someday I will come to find you.”
She looked up for a second before continuing, “I don’t want this to be our goodbye.”

Nishino smiled and step closer, giving the girl one last long hug before stepping back albeit reluctant.

“Then, see you later,” she motioned with a smile, hoping that would be enough as she doesn’t want her to promise anything yet not wanting to turn her down too.

“See you later.”

Deep down, somehow Nishino knows that the signs aren't just an empty word, she knows that Shiraishi will hold onto that. One day the girl will come again. And until then Nishino would cherish the short yet blissful moment they had together.


I can't believe I actually manage to survive editing this whoaaaaa.

Anyway Hi there! as you can read from well what I have said in the heading, this is suppose to be a thread for my one-shots and what could be a better opener than that one music video that got me hooked into Nogizaka46, in the first single of them that I actually pay my attention to, starring my ultimate OTP in the group  XD

Well actually this is supposed to be Naachan bday spesial fic, ahahahaha talk about being slow as hell, but yeah I've been having a rough week which in the end somehow everything works out pretty well and I decided to continue this well another reason being that I am hitting an amazingly thick wall on my other stories.  :banghead:

If you've been following my other stories you might realise that the formatting is a bit different than usual and assure you that's what I intend to do since in this story all the conversation is performed with a sign language instead of normal speaking, so I want to make it different to make it more impactful. The other thing that is different than usual is also striving for that "impactful" goal  XD I hope it will be able to reach you guys  :deco:

It might be a bit messy because it is too long and I basically have reviewed this for like 5 times but somehow still unsure, so I'm really sorry. I also don't know how good this formatting would look in phone so we shall see how it goes and maybe if it's really annoying I would go back and rearrange some things. So please do leave your thoughts below as I really want to know them and thanks for reading, cheers  :on woohoo:
« Last Edit: February 21, 2018, 08:47:22 AM by finiarel »

Offline wakaten

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Re: Nogizaka46 One-Shots || Then [09112017]
« Reply #1 on: September 11, 2017, 04:10:21 AM »
first hi my fav author..

second, this is soooooo damn good that i cannot wait to comment any longer to pay my gratitude for making this fic, this is perfect.. this is beautiful that i'm crying at every sentence of it, this is well developed (the reason why i admire you so much because i myself couldn't do that).

If you've been following my other stories you might realise that the formatting is a bit different than usual and assure you that's what I intend to do since in this story all the conversation is performed with a sign language instead of normal speaking, so I want to make it different to make it more impactful. The other thing that is different than usual is also striving for that "impactful" goal  XD I hope it will be able to reach you guys  :deco:

well this is exactly what i think, the format is suitable for this story, it puts me in the situation of how people who couldn't hear and make me so engrossed in the story of silent but fulls of emotion.

you make me want to read this again and again while listening to ima hana,

Well actually this is supposed to be Naachan bday spesial fic, ahahahaha talk about being slow as hell, but yeah I've been having a rough week which in the end somehow everything works out pretty well and I decided to continue this well another reason being that I am hitting an amazingly thick wall on my other stories.  :banghead:

nvm that naachan bday has past few months ago, this is still can be counted as celebration for her becoming centre again..
i don't mind your 'other stuck up stories' as this one make it up for all.. now i realised that what i missing is not your other stories (well actually there is tiny of it) but i miss your masterpiece because i cry out of happiness everytime you post.

last, please do one shot again,   :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow:
thank you a lot


It might be a bit messy because it is too long and I basically have reviewed this for like 5 times but somehow still unsure, so I'm really sorry. I also don't know how good this formatting would look in phone so we shall see how it goes and maybe if it's really annoying I would go back and rearrange some things. So please do leave your thoughts below as I really want to know them and thanks for reading, cheers  :on woohoo:

tw i read this from phone first and it looked perfectly fine, so don't bother yourself to rearrange or something, unless you find something annoys you?  :deco: :deco:
« Last Edit: September 11, 2017, 04:19:21 AM by wakaten »

Offline clin-nolan

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Re: Nogizaka46 One-Shots || Then [09112017]
« Reply #2 on: September 11, 2017, 05:10:32 AM »
I love this one shot  :heart: :heart:
NanaMai is my ultimate OTP too  :D
When I see this MV I always imagine that they kiss in the part that they say goodbye  :wub:
I'll wait for more stories  :twothumbs :twothumbs

Offline finiarel

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Nogizaka46 One-Shots || New Year's Eve [07012018]
« Reply #3 on: January 07, 2018, 01:49:06 AM »
AN: This is a quick drabble is dedicated for the readers of Sakanatachi No Love Song fanfic, who has unexpetedly surpassed 10K reads. This is set in that story universe as well (so it's a flashback story), but can be read without needing to know Sakanatachi, so worry not  :nervous. Happy New Year everyone  :D

New Year's Eve

“TEN!!!!” Nishino Nanase grabbed the remote next to her, lowering the volume of the television across of her quickly. Her eyes wandered to the person besides her shortly after that, checking If the ruckus from the screen has disturbed the person’s sleep.

Nishino smiled, her fingers hesitantly raised toward the person’s face, carefully tucking back the stray hair that covers the peaceful sleeping face from her vision. In the background, she could see the night sky that has started to be painted in colourful colours of fireworks, notifying her that the new year has begun.

“Mai, Happy New Year,” Nishino whispered softly so she wouldn’t wake up the sleeping girl, scooting gently closer to give the person a kiss on the forehead. She chuckled when that gestured had somehow earnt a little bit of movement from the girl who is still deep in the dreamland.

Nishino remembers Shiraishi asking to wake her up in case she falls asleep, but somehow Nishino doesn’t have the heart to do so. She knows her girlfriend must be really tired, a few hours ago she just reached Japan after a 14 hours flight from New York. For Nishino, having someone that she loves next to her as the year change is enough, she’d rather have the girl resting properly than tiring herself even more for a mere celebration.

Shiraishi stirred a little, causing Nishino to freeze, cautious of waking her up, thankfully, the rhythm of the sleeping girl breathing went back to slow and stable not long after that, a signal that she is still in deep slumber. Nishino smiled, scooting closer so their nose is just an inch for touching each other, inhaling the faint smell of lilac that comes from the older girl. As if the soft sound of the other girl’s breathing is a lullaby, not long after, Nishino drifted into the dreamland as well.

She woke up suddenly upon hearing a gasp coming from next to her, finding her girlfriend with forehead wrinkled and eyebrows furrowed in frustration, something that the girl does a lot whenever she woke up late or forgot something.

“Nanase, we missed the new year countdown!”

Nishino rubbed her sleepy eyes, “ah, right.”

“I’m really sorry. I mean we don’t even get to spend days like this together lately, and now that I’m here I recklessly fell asleep.”

Nishino shook her head. “It’s totally fine. You must be tired after the long flight. I am also tired as well.”

“But I didn’t get to give you the year-end kiss,” she pouted.

Nishino sighed, letting the girl cupping her cheek with her soft hand. “I don’t need that. Just being with Maiyan is enough.”

The girl’s eyes seem to lit up a little, as well as the little smile on her lips. Shiraishi closed their distance and gently clash her lips with hers. Nishino can feel the corner of the other girl’s mouth curling up even more as she kissed back, pressing as long as she could before pulling back from the lack of air.

“Thank you. For putting up with me. I hope this year will be an amazing year for us.”

Nishino nodded, her hand moves forward towards the girl's face, thumb tracing Shiraishi’s glistening lips. Shiraishi gives the finger a little peck as well. Her mind wandered on the year that has passed, where a lot of things has happened in her life, a lot of change that was really challenging on her, and despite everything, she is grateful that the other girl’s love towards her doesn’t seem to fade away.

“I love you.”

Nishino smiled, leaning forward to kiss her lips for the second time in the year. “I love you too.”   

~ Fin ~

Anyway I saw the replies on the last one shot that I post and I'm glad that you guys taking it well despite the not so happy ending  :cathappy: Thank you for reading, hoping you're liking this one as well. Cheers  :cow:
« Last Edit: January 07, 2018, 07:09:12 AM by finiarel »

Offline four4four

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Re: Nogizaka46 One-Shots || New Year's Eve [07012018]
« Reply #4 on: January 08, 2018, 01:50:16 AM »
Happy new year!

A cute OS between Maiyan and Nanase. I like it. :wub:

Offline clin-nolan

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Re: Nogizaka46 One-Shots || New Year's Eve [07012018]
« Reply #5 on: January 08, 2018, 04:00:23 AM »
Thank you very much author-san :heart: :heart:
This drabble calms the anxiety for the next update :lol:
See you later  :D

Offline finiarel

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Nogizaka46 One-Shots || Finding Your Happiness [16/01/18]
« Reply #6 on: January 16, 2018, 04:44:44 AM »
This one is actually an NSFW story that is cut, so the one I posted here is only the SFW part. If you're interested to read more of this, please head to please proceed wisely as it contains adult material.

Pair: Sakurai Reika X Shiraishi Mai

Finding Your Happiness

From the first place, it is pretty unusual for someone to do their laundry so late at night on normal weekdays, Monday no less. That’s basically why she has always tried to get the clothes washing matters done at this time, it is less stressful when every single machine is available. However, today is somehow different.

Well, who would have thought that the laundry room in the apartment building will be foaming with detergent on 11 at night? She quickly wiped the foam that somehow got into her mouth, cursing under her breath when the bitter chemical taste got into her tongue. She threw her gaze around, noticing that almost every single tile on the floor is covered by the fluffy looking white foam. She stopped when her eyes reached a young woman who’s looking at her, a mixed expression of sorry and disbelieves on her face, hand holding the floor mop awkwardly as their eyes met.

“R-Reika-san? What are you doing here?” the person asked, clearly embarrassed with the whole situation.

“I live here,” she raised her eyebrows. “Well, not literally here of course. My place is on the level 3.”

As her hands moved to wipe the excess foam from the back of her short, she stands up carefully, making sure that she wouldn’t slip again. Inspecting the other girl from head to toe. Part of her still could not believe that it is truly her.

She usually sees the girl in full makeup, completely ready for a photo session, but this time the girl has her beautiful hair tied in a messy bun, a black t-shirt with a sports brand’s name sticking on her body, the same brand logo is embroidered in her short pants, completed with a simple red Hawaiian slipper adorning her foot.

There is something about the person plain and a bit messy look that makes her mind goes blank for a moment, pulling her into those few times she had seen her after their casual lustful encounter.

Sakurai Reika shook the thought out of her head, her hand reaches for her laundry basket, which by now is almost empty as the content has fallen onto the floor, a result of her clumsy slip. As she tries her best not to curse upon the need to gather the stuff back into the basket, the person moved closer to help her.

“I am really sorry,” she apologized.

“I have never thought that the divine Goddess Shiraishi Mai is amazingly horrible on household chores,” Sakurai said, calling her like how some people would describe her in order to mock her even more.

The girl let out a slight ‘tsk’ in annoyance, “technically this is not my doing. My sister was the one who did this out of her sudden urge to help me with house chores. As you can see she’s amazingly horrible on this kind of stuff. Long story short, she’s having a guest right now so I am the one who came to get the clothes and that’s how I ended up here.”

“Your sister is an opera singer, isn’t she? The one who did Romeo and Juliet?”

“That’s the one,” she chuckled. Both of them works in silence for a while. Sakurai notice when the girl picks up one of dark coloured undergarment from the floor, looking troubled before quickly tossing it to the basket, “sorry.”

Now it’s Sakurai turn to laugh because of the other girl reaction, “come on, it’s not like you haven’t touched them before.”

“Well, unlike you I still have some decency to feel embarrassed from touching someone’s underwear,” she pouted to cover her embarrassment.

“Really? I don’t recall you being shy when you slide it off from my body.”

“Have you ever been slapped with a mop?” Shiraishi squinted, totally not that pleased with her teasing.

“I surrender, I need my face intact,” Sakurai raised both of her hands jokingly as she chuckles for several more seconds. She gathered several last pieces, making sure everything is there before picking up the basket to the nearest empty machine. Swiftly she loaded everything and latch the circle shaped door, stealing glances at the girl every several seconds.

“How come I’ve never seen you around?” she asked as her index finger pressed one of the buttons to start the cleaning cycle.

“I don’t really need to use the communal facilities, I have a washing machine in my place, it’s just that it’s currently broken,” she explains as she started to mop the floor.

“Well, seeing for the current turn of event, I am not surprised that it’s broken.” Sakurai spun so she can see the girl without the need to turn her head around, leaning back to the machine with her hands folded in front of her chest as she observes her, “But really I have never heard anything about you or your sister living here, so I am really surprised.”

“I moved in about a year ago because I can’t stand how some people actually waited around the area to take a picture of Shiraishi Mai and her always changing secret lover. That’s why I am really trying to keep this place a secret, so I would be really thankful if you don’t mention this to anyone,” she pleaded.

“Your secret is safe with me,” she assured as she made a mouth zipping gesture.

Shiraishi smiled, stopping for a moment to wipe a bead of sweat from her forehead, “that aside, how come I didn’t had you over the last couple of N46mode photoshoot?”

“You can always call if you want me that much, a love hotel couldn’t be that far.”

“You know what I mean,” she said irritably. “Are you avoiding me or something?”

Sakurai teasing smile melted into a bitter one, knowing that the person almost hit the correct spot on that one. “You know that’s not true. I would never do that.”

“If that’s not true then how come they suddenly have Hashimoto-san to handle my photoshoot instead of you?”

She sighed, “well they kind of found out about our casual outings, what would you expect? You surely wouldn’t want people to start a rumour on you doing such things to score a job, wouldn’t you?”

Shiraishi looks troubled for a moment. However, she says nothing as she wrings the mop before placing it neatly on one side of the room. Sakurai inspects every single move she makes, waiting for an answer patiently.

“To be honest, I couldn’t care less. It will just be one of many rumours,” she finally said, looking straight into her eyes, “it wouldn’t make any difference. Just like how it wouldn’t stop people from offering me a job, it never did.”

Sakurai should have been able to predict that kind of answer from the girl, knowing that she basically lives with troubles, having her name written on the scandal newspaper at least once a month, even more lately. Sometimes she wondered what kind of thing happened to her, how come she easily turn a blind eye to everything and live her life like this.

Smoothly Shiraishi took her place to stand next to her, looking to her side so their eyes could meet, this time being the one who patiently waits for her to say something.

“However, it would stop my employer from hiring me. In all means of professionalism, I really enjoyed working with you, but I had to do something about that, I hope you can understand,” Sakurai admitted.

The girl went speechless, she looked down for a moment, seemingly forming words in her head carefully before finally speaking up, “I have no idea. I’m sorry for troubling you”

“It’s for the best,” Sakurai replied as a matter of fact.

Sakurai couldn’t help but feel guilty upon seeing Shiraishi sad face, but what did she expect? From the first place, it is inappropriate for a photographer like her to have a consensual relationship with a model. It’s not like she’s that important anyway, she’s just one from a pool of many girls for her, right?

“Hey, it’s not like it was serious or anything. I mean you also have other girls too,” Sakurai tried to console the girl.

“Idiot,” Shiraishi muttered, her voice cracking uncontrollably as tears starting to drop from her eyes. “You never get it, didn’t you? All those time I invite you to have dinner after a photoshoot, the shopping spree, even the stroll along the set. I told you that I’m willing to change, am I? Were you deaf back then or you’re just too stupid to understand?”

Shiraishi's hands weren’t even moving but Sakurai felt like it was a slap on the face. She was too blinded by media’s image of Shiraishi that she couldn’t decipher her attempts to change. It has been months since she started to put some distance between them and within that months she is aware that the model has been getting in too many problems, some even more extreme than ever.

Was that her way to mend her broken heart? The one that Sakurai Reika has unknowingly torn into pieces? Was she somehow has become a reason for Shiraishi’s concerning way of living? Slowly she turned towards the girl, her hand raised up to cup a side of the girl’s beautiful face, thumb tracing the line of tears to wipe it out.

“I’m sorry, please don’t cry,” she muttered, looking straight into the girl’s eye, hoping that it would calm her down a little. However, seeing how her tears keep dropping down she decided to close their distance and engulf her in a comforting hug, “I’m so stupid. Please forgive me.”

“It-It's not your fault. It’s just that I… I like Reika-san,” the taller girl finally mumbled after a while, “I want our relationship to be more than just a one-night thing. I have no idea… that it was like that.”

Sakurai broke their hug, looking at the person in front of her in disbelieves. For her, Shiraishi has always been an unpredictable riddle. Sakurai has always been curious about what she thinks, what she feels, what she wants to do, yet Sakurai has never dared to ask. She thought that it would be out of line if she does.

Sakurai knows she couldn’t deny the fact that deep-down her heart has fallen for her.

It’s not simply about how beautiful she looks, how mesmerizing she moves, or how her sweet fragrance mirrors her actual personality. It’s about how she wants to know about her days, whether it is joy or sadness she wants her to be able to share it with hers. It’s about how she wants to be the first one that laughs at her jokes, the one standing up proudly to gives a round of applause as she walks down the runway, the one that she can share her worries with, and the one that wipes the tears off her face when she’s crying.

There’s only one thing that she could think of in response to the confession. She raised her fingers to clear the leftover tears from the girl beautiful face. Trying to calm her racing heart before finally locked her eyes with her once more, gazing deep into the seemingly normal yet somehow breathtaking brown orbs.

“Then, be my girlfriend, would you?”

Shiraishi furrowed her eyebrows, “but… how about your job?”

“I am not your photographer anymore, I can’t see why they will consider it unprofessional. But if they still do, screw them! Even if they can kick me out, I don’t care,” Sakurai vented, “I’ve done enough. So now, all I want is our happiness. If it means that I must be selfish then, so be it. That’s why, Shiraishi Mai, I want you to be my girlfriend. Will you be my girlfriend?”

“Yes,” Shiraishi simply replied, her bright smile seems to match the sparks in her eyes as she reached for Sakurai’s arm and pull her closer.

Sakurai closes the tiny distance that is left between them, locking the girl’s lips with hers. Letting her lips showing her gratitude without any spoken words.

~ Fin ~

Offline four4four

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Re: Nogizaka46 One-Shots || Finding Your Happiness [16/01/18]
« Reply #7 on: January 16, 2018, 01:15:37 PM »
Maiyan are you sure you aren't lying about your sister causing the mess? :P
You probably knew that Reika lives in the same building. :)

I'm happy that they got together in the end. :heart:

Might read the NSFW version now. :wub:

Offline finiarel

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Re: Nogizaka46 One-Shots ||Morning Blues [21/02/18]
« Reply #8 on: February 21, 2018, 08:47:05 AM »
Pair: Takayama Kazuya (Male) and Shiraishi Mai
Type: two shots

Morning Blues

Bright sunlight roused Shiraishi Mai as it filtered through the blinds. Groggily, the woman stirred, blinking a couple of times to shoo away the massive headache, grunted when her attempt turns out to be fruitless.

“Shit,” the 25 years old muttered as she stumbled her way through the toilet which thankfully is still inside the room. Kneeling next to the toilet bowl as her body retched to push out whatever it is that was in her stomach.

Soon enough someone pushes her hair back from her face, another hand rubbing the spot where her back and neck meet.

“Take it easy,” the voice said, shadowing her as she moved to the basin and wipe her mouth with a warm water. Shiraishi felt grossed out when she realised just how much she has vomited but chosen not to overthink that as her eyes met the guy who is standing behind her.

“Sorry. I really hope I didn’t cause you any trouble last night.” She apologised as she tried to remember what she had done while under the influence of alcohol. The last time she was fully conscious she was still on the private plane back home, she could remember asking the cabin attendant to pop her a bottle of fine pinot noir, which has proven to be a bad friend when she has a lot in her mind.

“It’s fine, it’s not like I haven’t been in your position. But just to make it clear, when I said that you could handle your liquor well, I wasn’t challenging you to gulp down two bottles of $500 wine in one sitting.” The man chuckled as he hands her a warm towel to dry off her face.

Shiraishi mouthed inaudible thanks before burying her face in the soft fabric which smells faintly like a fresh detergent. Her brain started to remember the turn of events of the night before, starting from how stressed she was from having to skip the last half of New York Fashion Week that leads her to blabber how she probably wouldn’t get any offer for future events anymore. In addition to that, her personal assistant who wasn’t thrilled with her decision to fled from the most important fashion event in the world wasn’t helping her case at all. “That fucking CA should have stopped me.”

“Hey, hey, wouldn’t want little Momo to start cursing around, are we?” The man reminds her as he gives her a gentle hug from behind.

“By the way, thank you for taking care of her while I was away.” Mai relaxed to his embrace. “I hope she didn’t give you any trouble.”

“Not at all, she is a nice kid, just like you.” His answer is followed by a peck on her cheek, which has caused him to scrunch up his nose and took a step back. “Okay, I think you need to take a shower ASAP, you smell like a bad mix of alcohol and vomit.”

Mai laughed, provoking a little smile from the man. She spun on her heels and gave him a deep kiss. “You’re cute when you’re grossed out.”

“Are you sure you’re not still drunk?” He joked as he gently pushed her towards the shower. “I’m going to cook us some decent breakfast and help Momoko get ready for school. Do pancake and scrambled eggs sounds good for you?”

“You’re the man.” She gave him another kiss on the cheek before letting him go and stepped into the shower.

The man’s name is Takayama Kazuya, albeit just turning 24 years old earlier this year he has achieved far from most people around his age. While the other people on his age are still struggling in a company junior position, Kazuya already invests in numerous business around Japan and even few overseas.  He definitely has talent when it comes to deciding which company will actually do well and which won’t, thus’ he earnt his place among the top 20 richest people in the world, placing him among other people with similarly great minds.

Meanwhile, his other half is also successful in the different field. Shiraishi Mai is a world-famous supermodel. Unlike Kazuya who was born in an average family, Mai is a daughter of a rich politician in the country, so she has basically never been in any situation where money is much of a concern. This is probably one of the reasons she is sometimes more reckless and a bit uncontrollable than him. However, just like her man the young woman takes her job seriously.

After a nice warm shower, Mai dressed in a nice long sleeved black top with a red skirt that reaches her knees. The shower does help a bit on making the hangover more bearable, but still, it was hard to resist the temptation of jumping back to the bed and sleep.

“Mama! I didn’t know you will be back so soon!” A voice greeted her excitedly as she stepped into the kitchen. Shiraishi Mai smiled and approached the young girl, giving her a kiss on the top of her head and a warm hug.

“Look who’s sitting on the grown-up chair,” the young mother teased, noticing how the 6 years old is sitting on the kitchen counter’s stool instead of the chair in the dining table.

“Kazuya helped me up. He said it’s okay now because I am tall enough to reach the first footstep.” The girl explained merrily, giving the man a toothy grin after she finished her sentence.

“Just be careful, okay? And no climbing up there unless there is me or Kaz helping you out.” She warned, not letting the girl break their eye contacts before she gave a nod.

For months Mai has been forbidding the young girl to sit there as she is afraid she will fall over considering the stool design and height. But seeing the girl looking proud and happy refrain her from being mad. Besides, they have been trying to win the girl approval of Kazuya. Especially now that she and he are engaged.

The thing is, Mai and the girl’s father were not together from the beginning. It was actually a drunken mistake that happened when Mai has just graduated high school, but thankfully the guy was responsible enough to help her raise Momoko, taking the girl share of custody while still keeping a good friendly relationship with Mai.

When Momoko was young she tried to make her parents together. However, it’s impossible to do so as her papa prefers the company of men. It took them a hard few months to explain to the young girl how not every mama and papa is together, several rough months to explain that some people fall in love with the same gender, and another few weeks to make her sure that no matter what happens both parents still love her very much.

Now that both Mai and the girl’s father already has a respective partner that keeps them happy. Sometimes it makes Mai a bit paranoid that it will be too much to take for such a young girl.

“Are you feeling much better now?” The man asked as she grabbed a glass of apple juice near him, taking a seat next to her daughter in case the young girl clumsiness kicked in.

Mai nodded as she started to eat the scrambled egg on her plate. A bit surprised when she finds it more pleasing than usual. Not that Kazuya cooking is bad, but the man usually serves average food, which is far below Mai’s level of dishes.

“I don’t know if this is just my empty stomach talking but this egg is something else.” She complimented.

Kazuya smiled, looking proud of himself. “I told you that sooner or later your skill will rub off on me.”

“Two days ago, he spent two hours to watch YouTube video and learnt to cook this,” Momoko revealed.

Shiraishi laughed, “that sounds fun. Care to tell mama what else has happened while I was away?”

She had expected her daughter to throw another fun story, however, the girl just looked at her food with a gloomy face as she eats the last piece of pancake left. Frowning, Mai throws a look at her fiancé asking for his explanation, however, the guy was also looking at the girl with a confused face.

“Hey, sweetie, you know you can always tell me if there is something.”
Momoko gives her a look, “promise me you won’t be angry.”

“Well, I don’t even know what you did, so of course I can’t be angry,” Mai try to twist her sentence, urging the girl to tell her what is happening.

The kid moved sloppily on her chair, almost falling down from jumping out of the stool. Then she grabbed something from her bag that sat on the floor. Handing Mai a paper which from the way it’s folded can be known that it is from her school.

Shiraishi Mai eyebrows furrowed as she read the letter. Her expression getting harsher as she finally reaches the end.

“I can explain. The letter makes it sounds really bad but it’s not actually that bad. And he kind of deserved it.” Momoko defended herself before her mother could say anything.

“What part of using a stick to hit someone’s waist until it bruised is not that bad. I had enough! I thought we have agreed that kendo is a sport and that is not something that you learn to beat people up. This is the third time this year alone. You’re grounded, young lady! No iPad for a month and no more practising Kendo too!” Mai jumps off from her stool and roughly grabbed the tablet inside the young girl’s bag.

“Hey, isn’t it too early to ground her? Can you tell us what happened, Momo-chan?” Kazuya tried to calm the situation down.

Momoko’s lips starting to quiver, her eyes starting to water. “He was mocking papa. He called him a fag and he said papa will go to hell because he is a fag.”

After that Momoko pretty much run back upstairs, a slam of door can be heard not long after. Mai squeezes her forehead, trying to relieve a headache that has started to worsen because of her daughter problem.

Now that she knows the reason, Shiraishi Mai felt a bit shitty. However, she didn’t feel like taking back her words as she doesn’t want her daughter think that it is okay to resort to violence in any kind of situation.

“I’ll talk to her, just finished your breakfast first.” Kazuya put his plate and Momoko’s in the sink, giving Mai a gentle squeeze on her shoulder before leaving the room.

A minute hasn’t even passed since Mai started to finish what’s left of her breakfast when the house bell rang.

“I’ll get it!” She shouted as she jumped off from the stool and did a mini-run to the front door. She opened the door without even checking from the camera view first as she already knows who will be there.

“Good morning,” the man softly said, tilting his head a little bit to see past Mai. “Where is Momoko? Is she ready yet?”

Mai sighed, stepping aside as a signal for him to come in.

"She got herself into a problem in school and decided to get her revenge with kendo style hitting the guy,” Mai explained. “The school sent a letter asking her parents to come.”

“What kind of problem?” The man raised his eyebrows.

“Some kid was mocking your sexual orientation and Momoko lashed out at him. I kind of regret letting Kaz teach her kendo, it seems she’s not that emotionally matured yet for that.”

“So, you’re going to stop her from learning Kendo?”

“Not stopping her completely of course. Just postponing it until she’s old enough.”

Nishino Nanao sighed, his eyes looking at the stairs that led to the second level where his daughter room is. “Let me take care of this matter. I’ll go to her school and meet the teacher. Also, I don’t think you should stop her from learning Kendo. It’s good for her self-esteem. She is less shy ever since-.”

The man was interrupted by the sound of footsteps from upstairs as Kazuya and Momoko came into their field of view, the girl's eyes were still red from crying and she said nothing as she latched on her father, not even bothering to look at her mother.

“Maiyan, it’s totally up to you but please consider that.” The man softly said before, crouching down to see his daughter at the same eye level. “I heard from your mother about what happened. You shouldn’t have done that, sweetheart. The next time it happens just ignore them, okay? Now you don’t need to worry, I will come to your school and talk to your teacher.”

Momoko nodded, tugging her father hand a bit before asking. “Can we go now? I don’t want to get yelled at from coming late to school.”

“Before that, I believe your mother wants to talk to you,” Nanao said as he opened the door to step outside, Kazuya tailing behind him, excitedly telling him a funny story from his office.

Kazuya and Nanao were childhood friends, this is also how Mai met Kazuya in the first place. When Momoko was born, Nanao basically chose Kazuya to be the girl’s godfather without batting an eye. Somewhere along the road, Kazuya started to gain his spot in Maiyan’s heart.

Mai crouch down to meet her daughter gaze, which she failed to do as the girl was looking to the floor, refusing to see her mother.

“Honey, I am proud that you are strong and able defend yourself but that wasn’t how you supposed to handle the situation. How about this, if you can promise me you won’t do something like this ever again I will let you continue practice Kendo. What do you say?”

“What if they are the one who hit me first?” The young girl replied with another question.

“Then you should defend your ground, not hitting them back.” Mai stroked the girl’s head a bit. “Because that what makes you stronger than them, both mentally and physically. And I believe you are strong enough to do that.”


“Good.” Mai smiled as she gave her daughter a kiss on her cheek. “Don’t trouble your papa so much, okay? You are an older sister now so you should try to set an example.”

Momoko rolled her eyes, “Mama, Yuki is not even 2, she can barely run.”

“More the reason you should be more careful around her.” Mai winked. “Tell Waka I said ‘Hi’. I’ll see you in two days.”

The young girl nodded, letting her mother hug and gave her a kiss on the top of her head. She dashed towards her father once Mai finally lets her go.

Both Mai and Kazuya waved the father and daughter goodbye, not leaving their front porch before the car has finally out of their sight. Mai exhaled loudly, feeling like going back to the comfort of bed as soon as possible.

“What a rough morning, huh?” Kazuya joked as he closes the front door, earning a simple hum in agreement from the woman who totally has lost her will to keep up with his humour. This didn’t escape the man observation, as he tails behind her, he circles his arms around the woman's waist. “She is going to be fine. You don’t need to worry.”

“I hope so.”

Kazuya raised his eyebrows, “I think you need to go back to bed and sleep some more.”

“Sadly, I can’t.” Mai bit her lower lips. “I have a photoshoot in 3 hours, well I can always get some sleep in the car or while they are doing my makeup.”

“But you just got back. And this is valentine’s day,” Kazuya frowns.

“Don’t be over-dramatic, it’s not like you’re taking a day off work. Our dinner is still about 12 hours away, the photoshoot will be done by then.” Mai started walked past the bed and straight to their huge walk-in closet, carefully looking each of the shoes on the floor. “This one or this one?”

Kazuya pointed at the white Gucci, a limited-edition sneaker that should have cost fortune yet Mai got it for free when she signed the deal with the luxury brand. “I don’t think you should wear heels. I mean you’re going to the photoshoot, right? You will have to change anyway so there’s no point. Keep the heels for tonight.”

“Great point.” Mai smiled, placing the heels back to the closet as she moved back to one of the chairs in the middle of the room to wear the sneaker. “You actually has pretty good fashion sense, remind me to ask you to be my personal stylist when this new girl finally quit.”

“That girl has just started to work with you for like a month, isn’t it too soon for her to quit?” Kazuya chuckled as he grabbed a set of business suit from one of the section in the closet that is dedicated to it.

“23 days actually.” Mai corrected in a low grumble. “And among 17 styles that she had to arrange for me, most of it was basically an off-shoulder clothing. Like seriously, I know it is good but isn’t that too much. The only thing that kept me from firing her is that I have made a promise to Sayurin that I will let 2 months pass before firing anyone ever again. Oh wait, I won’t be breaking any promise if the person is found dead, am I?”

“Technically no, you won’t be breaking any promise. But well, I am somehow deeply concerned. As someone who develops this city from nothing, it will be bad for my company if a single, 22 years old, fresh graduate is found dead in valentine’s day.”

Mai finally laughed, observing the man as he sits next to her to wear his pitch-black shoes. After he is done she gently tug his blazer, making him turn a bit to face her as she started to help him with his grey stripped white and blue tie, admiring the soft silky material as she neatly adjusted it around his neck.

She didn’t retract her right once she is finished, instead, she let it linger on his chest, eyes gazing up to his eye. “So, besides the heart-shaped pancake, strawberry smoothies, and the homemade chocolate in the fridge what else have you prepared for today?”

“Well, there is the dinner.” He replied in a whisper, giving her a kiss on the side of her face after that.

“And where is this dinner will be?”

“That would be something you should find out by yourself when the time comes.”

“Feeling secretive, aren’t we?” Mai was about to do something when the door-bell rang for the second time in that morning. The man laughed, letting his fiancé out of his hold. However, instead of going to open the door, the woman scooted closer and kiss him, ignoring the person who is standing in front of their door.

“Not that I hate what we are doing right now but I am pretty sure one of us needs to open that door.” He said as he pulled away.

“Nah, let it be. That’s Sayurin, she will drive me to the photo shoot today as I am still feeling the aftermath of the wine last night.” Mai explained. “But yeah, that kind of means I should hurry.”

“Ah- no adult stuff in this Valentine's morning?” Kazuya’s kiss goes lower to her neck once he heard that, his voice turned a bit more husky, tempting her to forget about her world and do what he had just implied.

“I will make it up to you tonight. I promise.” Mai claimed his lips in a gentle kiss as she slowly stepped back, earning an excited look on the man's face.

Kazuya walks with her to the front door, where her assistant is waiting with both hands folded, looking pissed because the woman is taking too much time.

“Sorry for the wait, we kind of had something to talk about.” Kazuya reasoned, giving the shorter haired woman a little smile of apology.

“We are running late, come on, Maiyan.” The person said. “Oh, and I always accept restaurant voucher as an apology.”

Kazuya laughed, “seriously, this is valentine’s day and you are asking more than what my own fiancé did.”

“That’s why they call it valentine’s day,” the assistant winked at him.

“I swear if you flirt with him one more time I will strangle you,” Mai grumbled, pushing the other woman away as she comes closer to Kazuya and gave him a quick kiss. “Don’t let Sayurin or any other woman get through you. I’ll be back before dinner, I love you.” 

Kazuya laughed, “don’t worry, I am sure they know how scary you are to even dare to touch me. And I must be really foolish if I want someone else when I got the hottest woman wearing the ring that I have given her.”

Kazuya motioned something to her and ran inside for a couple a second before coming back with something in his hands. Shiraishi's eyes widened as Kazuya hands her a small bag that she can identify as a lunch bento bag, “are we doing the high school styled romance now? Well, I can’t guarantee that I will even eat it as they will totally give me catered food”

“That’s a valentine’s special bento, I guarantee, it will taste better than food that is made without love.” Kazuya smiled, giving his fiancé a kiss on her forehead, “Have a great day. I love you.”

~To Be Continued~

Hi there! So this was supposed to be a valentine's day two shot. Yet because of a lot of unexpected thing and me being tired and lazy af to write this was on hold for a while. Well, this story consists of two chapter. The next one will be about the dinner that was talked about. Well, with how busy I am now I can't really promise when I'll post the second part, but I hope soon.  ;) ;) ;) Hoping you'll like this pair as well cause the new haruyama CM kills me

Offline four4four

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Re: Nogizaka46 One-Shots || Morning Blues [21/02/18]
« Reply #9 on: February 22, 2018, 06:36:00 AM »
Oooo a Kazumi x Maiyan fic.
If Nanase is a man into men in this fic, how did Maiyan and him end up in bed? Or did you mean both of them were drunk? :?
Momoko being Maiyan's daughter? Can't say that I expected that, but it seems to be something that you can expect. Maiyan is a tough mom though. She shouldn't be so harsh on Momoko. :P
Kazuya is a good fiance for Maiyan. He's learning to cook, seems to have a good relationship with Momoko, and is a good lover. When is their wedding? XD
Is Manatsu Maiyan's stylist? She does have a thing for off-shoulder clothing. XD
A bento made with love. Classic. :)

Looking forward to the second part.

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