Chapter 9
The following few days passed by eventfully.
The next day - a Sunday - Aya was ordered to her boss' office. She got a call early in the morning, and she'd reluctantly dragged herself out of bed and into suitable meeting clothes. In the short time I'd spent with her, I'd grown attached and didn't want her to leave.
"Go find a job," she teased me as my hand weakly tried to grab a hold of her skirt and pull her back to me before she left.
I was successful in pulling her over to stand by the bed, but I did nothing else. What could I do? I was half asleep and she had to leave. She bent down and kissed my forehead.
"I'll leave an extra key by the door. Don't forget to use it," she said, and with that, she was gone.
I got up half an hour later and sent her an e-mail, to which she didn't reply. She was probably in a meeting. I got ready for the day and quickly dropped by the convenience store to buy a newspaper. When I went to pay for it, the cashier gave me a friendly smile, as opposed to the robotic acknowledgement most people at convenience stores gave customers.
"Hi," he said as he began to ring up my purchase.
"Hi," I greeted him politely, wondering if all Family Mart employees in Tokyo were required to treat their customers like old mates from junior high school.
I paid, and with a "thanks", I left the store feeling good.
I got back to Aya's apartment, sitting down on the floor and spreading the newspaper's classified advertisements out in front of me. There was nothing suitable available for me. Nobody wanted someone with a partially finished degree in economics. Nobody wanted an ex-waitress to work for them. Also, I didn't want to work as an office lady at some second rate company office (which would probably be an easy job for me to get if I played nice in the interview). I wanted something challenging. Something that didn't have me doing the same thing over and over every minute of the day.
I sighed and grabbed my things. It was time to go out into the field.
I wandered around the neighbourhood. I spotted one "help wanted" sign, but I didn't have the qualifications to be a hair stylist. I had to forego it. I sighed and skipped over to Shinagawa on the train, wandering around the shopping centres. There was nothing. I couldn't even find a "help wanted" sign for a waitress job, which I would take to at least tide me over until I found something better. I was pulled out of my bad mood by my phone ringing. Aya had sent me an e-mail back.
That fortune slip was right. I get to keep my job! More details when I see you. Where are you?
I smiled, happy for her, and incredibly relieved that she didn't lose her job because she was off having fun with me. I wrote back.
Good. At least one of us is having luck. I'm job hunting nearby. Nothing so far. Know any places that want to hire a university dropout?
Her reply came quickly.
Have you tried offices? I've found that a lot don't advertise that they need help.
I sighed. Not the kind of job I wanted, but it was useful to know that there might be something out there that I just couldn't see.
I'll try that. Thanks, I wrote.
Aya sent one last e-mail.
I'm going home now. I'll see you later. Let's go somewhere for dinner!
That wrapped up our communication for the time being. At least I had something to look forward to - dinner. It was hardly anything new, but she would probably take me to some tasty place or her favourite hangout, and it would be my first real meal in Tokyo since getting there.
I spent the afternoon wandering around Shinagawa, but not just searching for work. I did a bit of browsing around the shops and the department stores. I found no job, but I did see a shop I wanted to inspect further once I was settled and had a source of income. It looked like it had been constructed for me personally. Anything I would ever want to wear was hanging on the hooks in the small establishment. So although I went back to Aya's place unemployed, I at least found yet another incentive to find a job.
I rang the doorbell when I got to Aya's. I had a key, but I felt weird just walking in. She came over and opened the door, rolling her eyes the minute she laid them on me and muttering something about how spare keys weren't just for show and were useful for something. When I tried to give it back, she insisted on my keeping it. She didn't specify how long I should keep it, but I put it in my mind to give it back once I moved out.
We sat down, and she explained what had happened. Her boss had fought hard for her and had had the rest of the top heads of her music label admit that they needed Aya no matter what. They had said she could stay, but they slapped her with a heavy warning that if she ever pulled any silly stunt like that again, they'd have no second thoughts about dumping her from their label. She had received yet another stern lecture for an hour about the rules of the company, and she'd been made to promise to apologise to all the people involved in the Italy project that had not gone through.
"They were probably so lenient because the public didn't know about this project. It was going to be one of those surprises that caught everyone off guard and then sucked them in. If the country had known that Matsuura Aya was going to Italy to train, I would have been shot for deserting," she laughed.
Amused she may have been, but the idea of Aya being shot (even just metaphorically) made me sad.
"I'm glad you got to keep your job," I said quietly, not laughing along, and she smiled gratefully.
"What about you?" she asked. "Any luck since we last talked?"
I shook my head.
"I checked some offices, but it's a little hard to just walk in and say 'hey, need help?'"
She nodded sympathetically.
"Well, it was only your first day," she said a little unnecessarily. "Maybe you'll have more luck tomorrow."
She put a comforting hand on my shoulder and kept it there as we sat in silence, thinking about our own situations. Maybe she was right. Maybe her extremely lucky fortune slip had assured her that she'd get her job back with hardly any problems, while my own job would take some time to find.
"But now, let's go out to eat and celebrate."
We got up and went out for dinner. She took me to an extremely expensive Thai food restaurant that she said she loved and ate at whenever she had an excuse to. She told me in a confident tone that I'd enjoy it. As we sat down and looked at menus, my heartbeat quickened when I saw the prices. This was no place for me to be eating. I didn't say a word, though, because I didn't want to ruin her thought-out dinner plans. I chose the cheapest thing on the menu and asked for water. Aya eyed me curiously.
"Water?"
I nodded.
"Water."
When she placed her order, she ordered cocktails for us, and I smiled cautiously, thanking her for thinking of me.
"And by the way, this dinner is free of charge," she said.
I wondered how that was possible.
"Do you know the owner or something?" I asked.
She shook her head.
"I don't know him. This is from me."
I sighed and was about to tell her not to start doing this kind of thing, but she raised a hand for my silence.
"I wasn't able to give you a Christmas present," she said, reminding me both that I'd spent Christmas with Hiroshi and that I'd given her the stupidest gift.
I groaned inside and winced. I wondered if she would even use the gift.
"Oven mitts don't equal dinner at the most expensive restaurant in this region," I mumbled, accidentally letting my opinion of the restaurant slip out.
She slapped my hand a little harder than I thought she would, and she gave me a sharp look.
"It's not supposed to be an equal trade," she reprimanded me. "It's the thought that counts."
She sounded so angry.
"But..." I started, and her look hardened as if daring me to say something to oppose her opinion.
I shrunk back and shut my mouth.
"If you don't want to be here, then you can go, but then you'll also be short one living space."
"If I don't let you buy me dinner, you'll kick me out of your apartment?" I asked in disbelief.
She nodded and then laughed.
"Do people usually have to threaten you before you'll accept a gift?"
"No," I sighed, "but I just don't want you to feel like you're obligated to give me anything or help me out with money. I don't want to be a burden or a moocher."
"You're not a burden," Aya said quickly. "You're really not. I'm always here to help you. Don't let your pride get in the way of common sense. If you need help, you can always ask me. I'd much rather you do that then suffer and get into situations that are hard to solve."
Drop the pride. Ask for help. Trust her. She was asking a lot, but I had to try.
I thanked her, apologised, and thanked her again. I made sure to relax and enjoy every bite of the delicious and late Christmas present. We made a toast to Aya for getting to keep her job and to me for moving to a new city in pursuit of a new life.
When we got home later that evening, we were all partied out. It was rather ridiculous that two young people like us would have gotten exhausted from dinner, but we couldn't stop ourselves from going to bed by eleven o'clock. My eyes drooped shut as we lay there on our backs, side-by-side under the covers. Aya seemed restless, however. She started tapping out a rhythm with one finger on the back of my hand.
"What?" I asked her.
"Nothing," she replied quickly.
Who had given her coffee before bedtime? She couldn't stop tapping out the rhythm.
"Uh..." I started.
I didn't mind her being restless, but tapping my hand repeatedly like a drum was a little weird.
"Sorry."
She stopped tapping and turned onto her stomach, breathing quietly, apparently calm.
My mind started to slip down a slide, descending into a pillowy bed of clouds...
Aya coughed and cleared her throat loudly. My eyes snapped open, and she shifted a bit, her elbow brushing my shoulder. When I closed my eyes again, she flipped onto her back. When I opened my eyes, she rolled onto her side and faced me. I turned my head to look at her, but her eyes were closed, so I looked back up at the ceiling. As I was staring up and trying to imagine a starry sky, I noticed her eyes open, so I looked towards her again. She closed her eyes quickly before she could be caught staring, and I thought that she was either dying to tell me something important or having some sort of strange, prolonged seizure. I kept my eyes on her until she opened her eyes again, looking at me sheepishly.
Was she playing a game? Was she not tired?
"What's up?" I asked, putting sleep on hold.
"I can't sleep," she said like a child.
"I noticed that," I snickered. "Why? Are you cold?"
I pulled the blanket up a bit more.
"No," she said with a shake of the head. "I'm excited.
I raised my eyebrows.
"I'm just glad you're here," she admitted. "I don't want you to go back to Hokkaido."
For reasons unfathomable to me, she cared so much. It gave me so much hope. I couldn't ever doubt what she felt when she went along saying things like this out of the blue.
"Me too."
I have to find a job tomorrow, I thought.
Even if it was just waitressing, I needed to show her that I was serious about staying in Tokyo. I thought that part of her might grow worried if I did nothing to start finding my niche here. If I got a job, an apartment, and made friends, she would see that I really wanted to stay.
"Tomorrow I'll find a job," I promised her.
Maybe she'd be able to get to sleep with that promise. I took her hand and squeezed it.
"Mmm," she acknowledged.
We spoke no more than night, and we went to sleep.
The second eventful day passed by. Aya woke me up by drying her hair. Now that she was back, she had a job to do, and that meant waking up early in the morning. I figured I may as well get out of bed and join her in getting ready for the day.
She launched into a list of things she had to do, but I didn't pay attention. I was busy using her computer to look at a map of the neighbourhood. I caught the words "filming" and "conference", so I assumed she'd be off doing some sort of "I'm Ayaya and I'm alive after these two months!" TV appearance.
She came by to say goodbye to me, but I only gave her a wave over my shoulder, too engrossed in what I was looking at for it to click in my mind that I wouldn't see her until late that night. She pulled me back into the world literally by grabbing me and hefting me up awkwardly to stand in front of her, twisting me around and then hugging me. It all happened in a blur, so I reacted instinctually and hugged back. She pulled back and then leaned in to kiss me, at which point I deftly slipped out of her grasp, avoiding her and her poisonous lips, sitting back down on the floor and returning to scrutinising the map. I hoped she hadn't noticed how shy and embarrassed I felt. Of course she did.
"I estimate seven more days till you stop freaking out every time I get close to you," she announced.
"What? I don't freak out," I said defensively, looking up at her.
She suddenly crouched down right beside me and stuck her nose against mine, making me pull back in surprise.
"Yes you do. See?"
I rolled my eyes while trying to put some distance between us.
"Whatever's holding you back, though, cut it off. It's not getting you anywhere."
She grinned, stuck her tongue out, and licked my nose. I scrunched it up.
"You have a strange way of expressing your love," I stated with a glower.
"Oh, come on. As if you wouldn't do that," she laughed.
Funny, she was right. I would do the same kind of thing... if I'd known her longer than two months. It was too early, though, to do that kind of thing and expect her to find it endearing. But maybe I was wrong. Maybe I could be my normal, weird self. Maybe I should.
Aya patted me on the back, said goodbye, and left. I sighed and hoped I hadn't offended her too much.
I went job hunting for the entire day. I faced failure after failure. I even went into a restaurant and offered my skills as a waitress or a chef, claiming that I could mix a mean cocktail and whip up the tastiest Hokkaido-style nikujaga. The elderly owner gave me a wary send-off.
I took a break for lunch at a convenience store, sitting outside and eating quickly to keep from freezing. It may have been warmer than Hokkaido, but cold weather was still cold weather. To me, winter had only two settings – unbearably cold and even colder, each as bad as the other.
The afternoon was a flop. My feet began to hurt from all the wandering and standing in one spot. I couldn't find a job. I headed back to Aya's apartment, completely dejected. Before I crossed over to the main road, I dropped in at the 7-Eleven to pick up a snack to tide me over until dinner time.
As I stood in line, I read the various posters on the walls. Nakashima Mika had a concert tour coming up in the spring, and I intended to go. I hadn't listened to her latest album, but I'd spied it on Aya's shelf that morning. I would definitely have a listen when I had a spare moment. There was also an advertisement for some sort of winter illumination festival happening in Ebisu, and I wondered if it would be a good thing to go to. I'd never seen the winter illumination in Tokyo, which was supposed to be world famous. Then a help wanted sign caught my eye.
Wanted: Cheerful, enthusiastic youths for part time jobs. Reasonable hours. Great pay. Start immediately. Become part of the 7-Eleven team!.
It was my turn to pay. I put my things down on the counter, and before I could stop myself, I opened my mouth and asked, "What would I have to do to get a job here?"
I pointed to the sign. The cashier, a girl who looked around my age, looked at the sign and then looked back me.
"Um, bring your resumé and talk to our manager," she replied helpfully.
Simple.
I thanked her, paid for my snack, and left.
No. I can't get a job at a convenience store, I scolded myself. I can do better.
And yet I found myself going back to Aya's, printing out a copy of my resumé from the disc I'd brought, and walking back to the store I'd seen the sign at.
I'd worked at a convenience store when I'd gotten out of high school, so I had a good idea of how things worked in such stores. My store had been a Family Mart, but they were all the same in the end.
I went back into the 7-Eleven. The same girl wasn't surprised to see me, and she called the manager upon my request.
The manager, Fukuda, was younger than I'd expected. I guessed he was in his mid-thirties. He studied me carefully as I spoke, and he glanced at my resumé as I explained that I'd just moved to Tokyo a few days ago and had free time on my hands. He listened some more and asked a few questions about my experience and whether I'd feel confident adapting to 7-Eleven after having worked at a Family Mart for almost two years. What kind of fool searching for a job would say he wasn't confident? I assured him I'd be okay, and I suddenly had a job without any check of credentials. Fukuda told me that since I knew how to work the till, I'd probably only need a day or two of training to accustom myself to 7-Eleven's particular system and procedures. He asked if I could come in the next day, and I said that I could.
An hour and a half later, I was walking back to the apartment with my new uniform shirt, a folder full of papers related to procedure, and a mind full of "are you stupid?!" thoughts running around.
I got back just past six and e-mailed Aya to tell her I was waiting. She said she'd be back in about an hour, so I decided to run a bath and relax. I sat in it for about half an hour, letting the hot water cure me of my aches and pains. Before I could fall asleep, I got out, dried myself, and went off to get dressed. Spotting my work shirt, I decided to quickly try it on to make sure it was the right size. I went out to the entrance to look in the mirror, and while I stood there making sure I looked all right, the door opened and in walked Aya carrying a bag of groceries. She noticed me right away and stopped in the middle of kicking her shoes off, staring at me.
"It's just a temporary thing until I can find a real job," I explained quickly.
She studied me and then walked over slowly.
"It's cute," she said finally, and she moved off to the kitchen.
Cute? The uniform was cute? No it wasn't. It was hideous. And didn't she have anything else to add? An opinion? A question as to how I'd gotten the job?
"Hey," I said, following her to the refrigerator, where she paused in putting away her recent purchases.
"Mmhmm?"
"Don't you think it's dumb? Like, me working at 7-Eleven?"
She shook her head.
"I know you'll keep looking for something else," she smiled.
"I will," I reinforced. "It's just that I saw the help wanted sign, and I used to work at a convenience store..."
Aya stood up and traced the company's emblem on my shirt, making me blush.
"I know it's not your dream to work at 7-Eleven for the rest of your life. I don't think you're any less cool because you've got a part time job there."
I smiled and sighed.
"There you go lying and making me feel all good about myself."
She punched my arm in an ungentle way, and I rubbed it.
"Now go change!" she barked. "You're going to cook for me!"
I laughed at her order, but I went to change into my pyjamas, folding my shirt carefully and putting it with my clean clothes.
Seeing that the bath was full, she decided to take a bath while I cooked. We each took our sweet time. By the time I finished preparing the nikujaga I claimed to be so good at making, Aya had gotten dressed in her pyjamas.
Pyjamas at eight pm and before dinner? How very geriatric of us.
We sat down, turned on the television set, and chatted as we ate my delicious meal. She loved it more than the Thai food we'd eaten the day before, or so she said.
"If you can cook for me every night, you can stay with me as many years as you want."
I laughed giddily, tempted to take her up on her offer. We were interrupted an hour later by a phone call. Aya took it, and for five minutes she sat there scheduling. When she hung up, she told me that Shibata had had to cancel her Tuesday plans, but that that we'd meet up with her next weekend. That worked perfectly for me since it turned out I was going to have a shift at the convenience store. My joke had turned into reality.
We spent the rest of the night talking on the couch, where we fell asleep. We woke up soon and dragged ourselves to the bed, where we proceeded to fall into it in a messy pile of limbs, falling back asleep almost instantly.
My new part time job was easy. My training lasted only three hours. I was quick on the uptake and was ringing up customers' purchases by lunch time. Fukuda was full of praise for me.
On the day of my first real shift, I found myself working with Kuniko, the girl who had helped me the other day. She ended up being very friendly. We became instant friends - or at least we mutually agreed in thinking that the other wasn't bad.
Kuniko was two years younger than me, born and raised in Chiba, and was currently doing an MA at Waseda University. A true brain with a pretty face and a pleasant, outgoing disposition. She had been working at this particular 7-Eleven for a year, this part time job preceded by a year at Lawson.
I told her the basics of myself, and she was surprised to hear that I'd moved all the way from Hokkaido.
"Have you got a decent place to stay?" she asked while we stood at the cash register, the manager in the back office and the store empty of customers.
"My friend's putting me up until I can find my own place," I explained. "It's a nice place, but I feel bad because she's really busy. There I am hanging around with all this free time."
Kuniko nodded sympathetically and then clapped her hands.
"You need a welcome party!"
"I'm not really into..." I trailed off, but stopped.
If Kuniko could become my friend, that would be perfect. And a party meant I could make more friends. Then I'd be able to reassure Aya that I would stay here.
"Nothing big. We can go out for dinner and a few drinks. We've got an awesome team at this store. We're lucky. And we've got some other friends we can invite. Kind of like a 'welcome to the neighbourhood' party!"
One thing led to another and suddenly I'd made plans with Kuniko to go out on Friday night. We exchanged contact information, and before I knew it, I'd made my second friend from Tokyo. We ended our shifts at the same time that day, but she went on ahead of me because I had to talk with the manager.
Fukuda praised me some more, telling me I was doing an excellent job. He told me to keep it up, and then he sent me off. I left the store feeling happier than I ever thought I could working at a convenience store.
I got home that evening and cooked before Aya came back. When she did, the first words out of her mouth were: "That smells delicious!"
We sat and dined. I told her all about my day and how Fukuda had praised me and how nothing had tripped me up, even the French couple that had come in trying to buy stamps without understanding a single word of Japanese. When I told her about Kuniko, I became shy because I realised I sounded like an elementary school student gushing to her parents about her first day at school and her first friend. I finished up quickly by saying that my welcoming party was on Friday night.
"I'm glad you made a friend," Aya smiled, and I felt like even more of a child. "And good thing you made plans for Friday night. I was feeling bad before I heard that because I'm being dragged to some formal dinner event by my boss."
I wondered how many of these events she had to attend and whether I'd ever be able to go with her to one. Probably not. But maybe she could get me on the invite list one day. I was so curious what she was like when mixed with all those celebrities. To me, she wasn't a celebrity like them. The thought that she was famous made me giggle. She was a regular girl. No, not regular. Of course not regular. She was special. But not a snobby celebrity.
"I don't envy you," I teased her, sticking my tongue out. "I'm sure my event will be much more relaxed."
She sighed.
"You're right. And they'll probably give me glass after glass of champagne just to knock me down and make me do silly things they can talk about for months to come."
Aya drunk? I wondered what that was like. I hadn't seen her get anything beyond a little tipsy, which just meant she was extra giggly and silly.
"That's okay. They'll probably give me glass after glass of beer in order to see how long the tough Hokkaido girl can hold out."
Not as long as they might have expected.
"And then the next day we're supposed to meet Shiba-chan," Aya groaned, suddenly remembering.
"Not till one o'clock, right? We'll make sure to get to bed early and to have some good painkillers close at hand."
Planning for our hangovers was a new thing for us.
"Always thinking about the future," Aya said, ruffling my hair, de-aging me yet another year.
"Anyway, what about you? How was your day?" I asked, remembering she'd mentioned filming.
"There was a big meeting in the morning where we all got our stories straight about my absence, and then I had a press conference with the media. They all wanted to know where I'd gone."
"What did you tell them?" I asked, in awe of how entire companies could pull together to make up a huge story about one girl.
"Mostly the truth. That I'd gone up to Hokkaido, but that it had been for an inspirational retreat. Getting in touch with nature and all that."
It sounded appropriate. We had done a lot of hiking.
"And what did you film?" I asked.
"Oh, some stations did a bit of interviewing. Nothing big. If you wake up early tomorrow morning, you'll see it on the news," she shrugged.
We stopped talking about work because it simply wasn't as fun as talking about other things. We kept busy until bedtime.
Later at night when Aya was fast asleep, I remained awake, shivering from the cold, covers pulled up to my nose. I was squeezed between the wall and Aya's back. Ever so carefully, I latched onto the sleeping form in front of me, trying to steal some of her body heat. She shifted a bit as if trying to shake me off but then stopped as though it wasn't worth the effort. I closed my eyes and tried not to think about the cold, listening to her slow heartbeat and cursing why I felt perfectly at ease when she was asleep and couldn't witness my affectionate nature. When she was awake, it was much more difficult. She was almost intimidating.
As I lay there holding this living, breathing human being, I had a revelation. I had to get over this other complex of mine. My fear of Aya. She'd proven countless times that she wasn't being wishy-washy with her feelings. It was time to start really trusting her. I looked down at her peaceful face. Starting at that exact moment, I'd let go of my fears and inhibitions. When she woke up in the morning, she'd see a relaxed, natural me.
Topic: Restart (Love x ∞ Part II) (Read 84285 times)