A new Wmatsui OS I written for a special someone who I care about a lot~
Special person, you know who you are~
I've written this for you and I hope you'll like it~
It's almost 19k words.. And I did it in a mere 3 days..
Just imagine the amount of sweat and blood I poured into this OS
I hope it will help you ease up your stress in your daily work and assignments..
Anyway, here it is~________________________________________________
OS # 18 Girlfriends (Wmatsui OS)When Jurina steps into the tour bus, she's greeted with the sight of Takamina and Atsuko making out. Rolling her eyes good-naturedly because it's a sight she's familiar with by now and she really doesn't begrudge them their time together since they spend so much of their time apart, she sees Rena lying face down on the sofa. Making a beeline for her, she's about to lean down to tickle Rena because really she's just leaving herself wide open for it, when she pauses and takes a closer look. Rena seems to be staring at Takamina and Atsuko. Jurina's hand is hovering over Rena's back, poised to tickle but something tells her this isn't the time. Instead, she shifts to drop her hand gently onto Rena's head and lets her fingers bury themselves in Rena's curly mop. Rena turns her head slowly and it's like she's literally dragging her eyes away.
Jurina immediately reverts to protective mode and she crouches down to block the couple from Rena's view. "Hey."
Rena's eyes are now locked on her and she can see the sadness in Rena's beautiful gaze. Jurina lets her hand drop onto Rena's shoulder in a comforting gesture.
"You okay?"
Rena shrugs and that's all it takes for Jurina to grab her hands and yank her up off the sofa, ignoring Rena's unhurried protests as she tugs her out of the room and into the bunk area. She pushes her gently towards Rena's bunk. Rena shifts so that she's more comfortable as she sits on the edge of the bunk and looks up at Jurina, who eventually takes a seat on her bunk opposite.
"What's up?" Jurina asks and she keeps her voice low and soft. Her hand reaches out to cover Rena's, resting on Rena's knee and she strokes the soft skin idly. Rena just looks down at their hands and frowns. "Come on, talk to me," Jurina says and she squeezes Rena's hand in reassurance.
Rena's eyes drop immediately to the floor and Jurina can feel her heart sink.
"It's okay, Rena," Jurina soothes and she grabs Rena's other hand, offering strength to her friend. "We'll get through whatever this is, yeah? It's okay."
"It's nothing," Rena says quietly and she sighs like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders. "It's nothing, Jurina. I swear."
"I don't believe you," Jurina says, shifting slightly so she can lean forward, because Rena is barely audible at the best of times. "Why are you so sad, huh?"
"It's silly," Rena says and her tone suggests that she'd like Jurina to drop the whole subject, but they both know that's not going to happen. Jurina can never walk away from any of them when she knows there's something wrong. She's like a dog with a proverbial bone when it comes to one of them being upset and fixing them. "I just - well, I just wish I could have what they have, you know?"
Jurina blinks slowly as she tries to understand. "You want a girlfriend?"
Rena shrugs yet again and Jurina can tell she's a little embarrassed, which throws Jurina completely because she's never known Rena to actively seek out a relationship before. Jurina is at a complete loss of how to proceed or what to say, so she just continues to stroke Rena's hands and waits.
"It's stupid, right?" Rena glances up at Jurina as if looking for validation.
"Of course it's not stupid," Jurina says automatically because it's not stupid that Rena wants someone to love and to love her back. If anyone deserves love it's Rena. She's often thought it strange that Rena has been single in all the time she's known her. "What's brought this on then?"
Rena flushes and Jurina heroically manages to stop her mouth from dropping open in shock because she's never seen Rena blush before. "I guess it's been sort of there for a while. Like when Miyuki comes to visit and Sayanee gets all stupid and giggly and it's ridiculous because Sayanee being giggly is so beyond weird but also kind of amazing and that's what I want, I think."
"Yeah," Jurina says softly. If anyone understands, it's her. She loves being in a relationship and although she's been enjoying her freedom recently, part of her still craves that feeling when someone is entirely focused on you, who smiles when you walk into the room, who lights up when you're near and who loves you more than anyone else.
"So, perhaps I should like, go on dates and stuff," Rena says slowly.
Jurina nods encouragingly.
"But maybe I should wait til we're back home," Rena says and looks to Jurina for assurance and smiles when Jurina nods thoughtfully. "I think it'd be easier when we're not on tour and I can, you know, have some time to myself without everyone watching. What do you think?"
Jurina lets go of one of Rena's hands and reaches up to bop Rena on the nose, grinning when Rena wrinkles her nose and grins back. "Whatever you think is best, Rena. I'll support you."
"Yeah," Rena murmurs as she leans in and lets Jurina hold her in a loose embrace, her hands stroking gently down Rena's back. "I know."
"Hey, let's go shopping," Jurina says because she knows it always cheers Rena up.
"Shopping?" Rena asks and Jurina can see her eyes light up. "What kind of shopping?"
"Uh, whatever shopping you like?" Jurina says. "Clothes, music, home stuff?"
"Clothes," Rena says decisively and Jurina thinks it'll be totally worth the hassle of trying to get past fans and closing down stores (which Jurina still thinks is lame but she understands the necessity of it) just to keep that smile on Rena's face. It takes very little persuasion to get Mariko to agree and soon they're pulling up outside a designer store and Rena's eyes are lighting up like it's Christmas morning as she looks at the store front and eyes up some outfits.
Rena reaches over and grabs Jurina's hand before the door opens and they emerge together, keeping hold of each other as they smile at the fans and wave as they sign a few autographs and pose for pictures before their hands find each other again as they're ushered inside. Jurina pulls her closer as they head for the first rail and hugs her for a second. "Okay?"
Rena nods as she starts to browse and soon the poor store assistants are buried under jackets and jeans and shirts for Rena while Jurina has passed over a few things to try on. Eventually, Rena stops pulling out clothes and heads for the changing room, dragging Jurina into the same one as she pulls off her skinny jeans and tugs on almost identical ones. Rena asks Jurina for her opinion on everything and Rena listens carefully, rejecting anything that Jurina doesn't rave over and spending ages trying to check out everything from every angle. She ums and ahs over a jacket that Jurina thinks looks great on her and eventually deciding to put it in her 'buy' pile. Jurina is persuaded by Rena to buy two pairs of jeans that Rena thinks make Jurina's butt look amazing, so really Jurina can't say no. By the time they're ready to leave, Jurina's blown a couple of hundred dollars while Rena's purchases run into the thousands but Jurina knows it's worth every penny because Rena is happy and smiling as they pose for more pictures before being whisked into the car. Rena cuddles up to Jurina and grins happily as she rests her head on Jurina's shoulder with Jurina's arm around her shoulder and falling to her waist.
"You're the best, Jurina," Rena murmurs happily.
Jurina eyes up the bags in the back of the car and simply refuses to think about the amount of money they've just spent. Instead, she lets her head rest on Rena's and closes her eyes. When they get back on the bus, Rena insists on pulling every purchase out to show the rest of the girls, who have varying levels of interest. Mayu, who is completely disinterested, loads up FIFA and hands a controller to Jurina, who starts to play with half concentration as she's also keeping an eye on Rena. Sayanee looks up from her phone every now and again and gives her opinion, good or bad, which Rena just rolls her eyes at. Takamina insists on Rena trying on everything and gives a nonstop commentary on whether she thinks it's flattering or not. It results in Rena throwing herself on Takamina and tickling her until Takamina gives in and calls for Atsuko's help.
Rena's mood immediately shifts as Atsuko steps into the room, looking sleepy and adorable from what was clearly a nap and Takamina whisks her back to the double room at the back of the bus that couples use whenever girlfriends visit. Jurina doesn't even realize she's moved until she finds herself sat next to Rena, throwing an arm around her, dragging her into her body and cuddling while keeping an eye on the television and fouling Mayu, who protests loudly while Jurina laughs. She throws the controller to Sayanee who drops her phone to catch it and she's right in the game within seconds, leaving Jurina free to turn to Rena, who looks up at Jurina with a slightly wobbly smile and the sight of Rena looking anything other than completely at ease and comfortable has Jurina's stomach swooping and her face drops. She grabs Rena's hand and stands up, muttering something about needing to talk to her and just hauls her out of the room. She stands by the door, trying to figure out where they can go before drawing her into the bathroom. She pushes the door shut behind her and drags Rena into a hug, which Rena returns tightly.
"I'm such an idiot," Rena mutters and Jurina just holds on tighter.
"Just think about how amazing you're going to look on your first date with what could be the love of your life," Jurina says sweetly.
Rena laughs and drops her head onto Jurina's shoulder, her body shaking uncontrollably. "Jurina, you're such a soppy romantic," she says with a shake of her head. "How on earth have you managed to stay single for months?"
Jurina shrugged and frowned. "I thought you wanted a relationship?"
"I do," Rena says quickly.
“Yup. You'll be a lot happier."
Rena hums in agreement as she presses a sloppy kiss against Jurina's cheek. "Absolutely. In the meantime, I have you to cheer me up."
"Glad I can help," Jurina grumbles as Rena laughs in delight once more.
When Atsuko goes home, Rena's mood lightens and while Jurina is keeping a close eye on her, she rarely sees Rena looking sad, nothing that a ruffle of her hair or tickling her tummy can't solve anyway. Of course, that might be because Jurina is deliberately distracting Rena and filling her days and nights off. So far, they've gone to a jazz night with Sayanee, they've hit the beach whenever they're on the coast, they've snuck into a few movie theatres to watch a few romantic comedies that Jurina has wanted to scratch her skin off during but Rena has laughed long and loudly through them all so Jurina guesses it's worth it in the end, they've been to a few basketball games and on their nights in, Jurina has sat through hours and hours of Rena's favourite boxsets. Well, she's sat next to Rena and dozed through them, but she's still physically been there and Rena has seemed to enjoy it, so Jurina's counting them as wins as well.
It's all going really well until Miyuki drops by for a flying visit. Sayanee lights up when she's nearly there and drums her fingers on her thighs as she anxiously waits for her to arrive. Rena's on her phone, texting or on twitter, Jurina's not sure, but she keeps looking up at Sayanee before her gaze darts away. Jurina's hand moves so that it rests on Rena's leg as she reads the latest email from her mum. She feels Rena's sigh and Rena's hand rests on her lightly. Jurina turns her hand so that she can thread her fingers through Rena's and she squeezes gently. When Miyuki bursts through the door and throws herself on Sayanee, Jurina carefully sneaks a glance at Rena, who just looks at her. Her mouth lifts into a small smile and Jurina's so relieved that Rena's okay that she just beams at her. Rena reaches out to touch the crinkles by one of Jurina's eyes and she grins before her hand drops back down to lace once again with Jurina's.
"You okay?" Jurina says quietly as Rena's smile begins to fade.
"Yeah, I'm good," Rena says and Jurina actually believes her this time. "Just ... stay here, ok?"
Jurina nods and turns back to her email, her hand still in Rena's. Miyuki only stays for one night before she has to get back to the band and then it's their last night on tour and soon enough they're on a plane back home, exhausted but excited to be on their way to Tokyo at last. Jurina thinks she could sleep for a week, but Rena wants to head straight out to catch up with friends. Mayu is heading back to Hokkaido and Takamina wants to bury herself in family. Sayanee just wants to disappear. When they land, they're all hugging and kissing each other goodbye, and it's always a mixed feeling of sadness and elation that they all understand perfectly. Soon it's just Jurina and Rena heading towards their car to share a lift back to their houses and they snuggle up in the backseat, shattered. Jurina can feel her eyes drooping as she managed to stay awake on the flight over but she's just about done for and she's dreaming of her big, comfortable bed and turning off her phone to just sleep until she can't sleep anymore.
"Hey, Jurina?" Rena's voice rouses her and she opens one eye to find Rena staring at her.
"Yeah Rena?" Jurina's voice is husky with sleep and she can barely focus on Rena's eyes which are swimming in front of her.
"Come back to mine?"
"Huh?" Jurina shakes her head as if to clear it but she still feels fuzzy.
"I don't want to go back to my place alone. Come back with me?" Rena asks again.
"Okay," Jurina agrees sleepily as she lets her head fall back onto Rena's shoulder. When she next wakes, Rena is shaking her gently and telling her that they're home. Jurina grabs her bags and follows Rena to the front door, remembering just in time to turn and thank the driver before she stumbles into Rena's house and the door closes behind her.
"Come on," Rena grabs Jurina's hand and tugs her upstairs, laughing as Jurina trips several times before Rena shoves her into her bedroom. Jurina tugs her shirt over her head and kicks off her converse before attempting to drag her jeans off. She finally manages it and falls headfirst onto the bed, grumbling as Rena tries to drag the covers from under her. She feels Rena slide into bed next to her and then she has a handful of almost naked Rena curling up against her. Jurina tiredly lifts her arm and Rena scoots under to slot her body in tightly. Jurina doesn't notice because she's fast asleep.
When she wakes up, she's sprawled across the bed. Or more accurately, she's sprawled across Rena. Somehow in the night, she's flung an arm and leg over Rena as if she's pinning her to the bed and her head is burrowed into Rena's shoulder. Jurina shifts slightly to bring her arm and leg back to a more reasonable position before she lifts her head to find Rena's face turned towards her, mouth open and drooling. Jurina grins and fumbles around for her phone, snapping a quick picture that she plans to use for blackmail at a later date. Jurina wriggles a little and starts to poke Rena's side, muffling a laugh when Rena frowns in her sleep before her eyes shoot open and she flips over so she lands on top of Jurina, to her surprise. Rena's down before Jurina can stop her and she finds herself on the receiving end of a love bite. She knows there'll be a mark there by the time she can remove Rena so she just lies back and lets Rena continue, enjoying the feel of her mouth on her skin in a way that Jurina no longer finds weird. Sometimes, it was just nice to feel a physical connection to someone, even if that someone was one of your best mates and she was only doing it for a laugh.
When Rena finally lifts her head, she's grinning like a lunatic and Jurina can't help but reach out and tickle her sides. Rena falls forward and giggles furiously as she wriggles to escape but Jurina just laughs, because it always amuses her when Rena thinks she can overpower her. Eventually Rena gives in and just flops against Jurina, who shoves at Rena's shoulder so that she falls onto the mattress and they both take a minute to catch their breath.
"I guess I need to go home," Jurina says finally, turning her head towards Rena.
Rena hums gently. "What are you gonna do today?"
"Uh," Jurina thinks about what she should be doing today versus what she really wants to do today. For once, just today, she figures she's going to do what she wants because she's earned it after the tour and she's going to be selfish for once. "Nothing, really. I'm going to take a whole day and do nothing with it."
"Not even unpacking and doing your washing or calling your parents or some household chores?" Rena teases and she shakes her head in mock-disappointment at Jurina's irresponsible ways.
"Nope," Jurina says cheerfully and sticks her tongue out at Rena, who just grins.
"So instead of getting up, showering, dressing and catching a cab to yours, you could stay and we can hang around doing nothing all day and get takeaway and you can crash here again tonight," Rena says thoughtfully, casting a quick glance at Jurina before staring up at the ceiling. "Because since I plan to do absolutely nothing as well, we could just do nothing together."
"You want me to stay?" Jurina asks, the surprise clear in her tone. "I thought you'd be rushing to kick me out the door so you can catch up with all the people you haven't spent the last two months stuck in a tour bus with."
"Not really," Rena says and Jurina can hear her sigh. "I hate going from seeing everyone every day to seeing no one and being on my own."
"Alright," Jurina says easily, because she's more than happy to stay. "But we're not watching any romantic comedies. Deal?"
Rena pouts but eventually gives in. Jurina showers, and shoves Rena in after she gets out because she still has standards. Rena throws on some jogging bottoms and Jurina manages to find some shorts in her bag and they sprawl across Rena's sofa. Rena persuades Jurina to watch the first Harry Potter movie and they both yell out their favourite line together and Jurina tickles Rena until she's gasping for breath and collapses onto Jurina's side. They remain locked together through Chamber of Secrets until Rena decides she's so hungry that she might die if they don't order some Chinese food. Jurina gets up to take delivery because Rena has decided that picking up the phone and placing the order is the entire sum of effort she can put into today and when Jurina places everything on the table, Rena sends Jurina upstairs to grab a duvet and they spend the rest of the evening eating too much food, laughing at each other and sneaking pinches and pokes to make the other jump. When they finally decide to turn in for the night, Rena drags Jurina into her room, ignoring Jurina's protests and jumps under the covers, lifting them up for Jurina who just sighs and climbs in. Rena cuddles up to her and Jurina has to admit that she misses sharing a bed with someone and cuddling with Rena just happens to be a way of life for her now. It's almost unavoidable.
"Thanks for staying, Jurina," Rena says quietly into the silence. Jurina just tightens her arm around Rena and buries her head into Rena's neck.
In the morning, Jurina wakes up and blearily announces that she really has to go home, but somehow (and Jurina's a bit fuzzy on the details) Rena talks her into staying again. Not that Jurina minds, she figures she'll head home at some point. They spend the day doing chores, like their washing and food shopping, bickering over fruit and whether they want carrots or broccoli for dinner, while Rena blocks all of Jurina's attempts to throw anything with sugar in the basket. Rena relents when Jurina throws popcorn in though and Jurina thinks that's a pretty good compromise.
As they're unpacking the shopping , Rena casually mentions that Yuko and a couple of friends are coming over. Jurina blinks slowly before she finishes putting the fruit in the overly large and ostentatious fruit bowl that Rena loves. "Oh, okay," she says, trying to ignore the bubble of hurt and rejection rising in her because she knows Rena just wants to see her friends, which Jurina can hardly blame her for, and it's time for her to go home really, so she starts towards the door. "I'll just grab my stuff and get out of here."
"Hey, what?" Jurina feels Rena's hand around her wrist and she's being turned around to face a confused Rena. "I thought you were staying here?"
"But you know, with Yuko and that lot coming here, I thought you'd want me to go." Jurina asks, her voice a little huskier than usual. "I mean, I don't really know them and I don't think they really want me here, they're coming to see you and this means you won't be on your own anymore right?"
Rena just frowns. "Jurina, I don't want you to go. I asked you to stay, remember? And who cares if Yuko likes you, because I like you and I asked you to stay because it's my house and I want you to stay, so just stay, ok?"
Confused, Jurina just nods because she's not sure what else she can do. She doesn't really socialize with Rena's friends so she's a bit intimidated by them but if Rena wants her to stay, then of course she'll stay.
Rena slips her hand in Jurina's and squeezes gently. "Okay?"
"Yeah, okay," Jurina says and she manages a small smile. "Just don't abandon me, ok?"
Rena just laughs and pulls Jurina back into the kitchen to unpack the rest of the shopping.
The visit goes pretty well, Jurina thinks. They stay for three hours, lounging around and catching Rena (and Jurina by extension) up on what's happened while they've been out of the country. Jurina doesn't exactly know who some of the gossip is about but she nods and smiles in the right places, she thinks. Yuko makes Jurina laugh a few times and she smiles at Jurina in approval, so Jurina counts that as a win. And Rena sits curled up next to her on the sofa for the entire time they're there. She doesn't cuddle Jurina or get all handsy like Jurina's used to Rena being, but she figures it's just that Rena behaves differently with different people and that's fine with Jurina because she likes to discover new sides to Rena. When they leave, Yuko makes a point of saying goodbye to Jurina and calls out that she's sure she'll see her soon and Jurina stands on Rena's doorstep, waving goodbye because Rena's drawn her there. When Rena shuts the door, she flings her arms around Jurina and shudders theatrically.
"God, they talk so much," Rena moans and Jurina just rolls her eyes because she knows Rena loves gossiping and she loves her friends and this is just Rena being silly. "Dinner?"
"You're cooking, right?" Jurina asks hesitantly because she's terrible in the kitchen.
"Course I am," Rena scoffs because she knows Jurina's terrible in the kitchen. "Come keep me company."
While Rena cooks, Jurina struggles to bring up the topic they've been avoiding while they've been holed up in Rena's house. "Uh, Rena?"
"Yeah?" Rena asks distractedly as she tastes her sauce and wrinkles her nose before reaching for more seasoning.
"The whole dating and relationship thing, do you still want to do that?" Jurina asks, a little nervous about bringing it up.
"Oh yeah," Rena says, whirling around and grinning. "I forgot about that. I should probably go out and meet some people, right?"
"Well, that's what you're best at," Jurina points out with a smile. "You pick up more friends on a quick run to the shops than I've done in my entire life."
"Firstly, that's not true," Rena says sternly, waggling her spoon at Jurina with a frown. "And secondly, I thought I was best at singing like an angel?"
"Who told you that?" Jurina teases and moves to avoid the onion Rena's just thrown at her.
"You did at judges houses when I was throwing up with nerves," Rena says as she turns back to the stove.
"A little white lie to get us through," Jurina says with a grin, which becomes a laugh when Rena glares at her and she hands her back the flung onion. "Hey, come on. Seriously, what's your plan?"
"Uh, I don't have a plan," Rena says with a shrug as she starts dishing up. She carries the plates over to where Jurina is and sits down, reaching for the glass of wine Jurina's poured them even though Jurina doesn't really like wine, simply because she knows Rena does and Jurina is the most well-mannered guest Rena will ever have to stay. "I thought I'd just go out, chat to some people and see if there's anyone I fancy."
"You make it sound so easy," Jurina grumbles as she takes a bite. "Hey, this is good!"
"Well of course it is," Rena says, as close to exasperated as Jurina's ever heard her. "What did you expect?" Jurina just winks at her and Rena flips her off before she picks up her fork and tucks in. "What do you mean, I make it sound so easy? It is easy."
"For you," Jurina says and that's all she's willing to say. She ignores the look Rena gives her and is grateful that Rena changes the subject to the text she got from Yuko a few minutes ago asking her and Jurina to a party tomorrow night.
"She asked me as well?" Jurina asks and she tries to keep the disbelief out of her voice.
"Yeah, course she did," Rena says as if she can't comprehend why Jurina wouldn't be invited. "You'll come, right?"
"I guess, if you want me to," Jurina says as she clears her plate and sits back, stretching. She sees Rena looking furtively at her and she grins. "You want me to lift my shirt, babe?"
"Matsui Jurina, you flirt," Rena mumbles through a mouthful of food. "You know I always appreciate your body, considering the amount of time you spend showing it off these days. You're staying tonight, right?"
"I might as well just unpack here, Rena," Jurina laughs as she carries her plate to the sink and starts washing her plate. "I really need to go home at some point."
"Why?" Rena asks and the blunt tone has Jurina looking over her shoulder at a frowning Rena. "I mean, you might as well just stay here."
Jurina's initial reaction is to say no, of course she can't stay here when she's got a perfectly good flat two miles away when she realizes that there's no actual reason for her to go home, except maybe to check that everything's in order and maybe pick up some different clothes. "Okay. But I pay for half the food and when you want me to go home, just kick me out, ok?"
"No problem," Rena says easily and she smiles that slow smile of her that has Jurina turning back to the dishes with a warm feeling in her chest.
"You wanna try that new boxset tonight?" Jurina calls over her shoulder and hears Rena agree.
Once the dishes are clean and set to dry, Jurina puts the show on and lies down on the sofa next to Rena, putting her head on Rena's lap and she sighs happily when Rena's fingers slide into her hair and strokes and rubs gently.
After a ridiculously good night's sleep, Jurina is up and bounding around the house early, trying to get Rena out of bed despite her protests. She ends up physically lifting her out of bed and carrying a wriggling and yelling Rena to the shower, dumping her inside and turning on the water, chuckling as she leaves a very wet and bedraggled Rena grumbling behind her. When Rena emerges, she's got a beanie shoved over her head and she's glaring at Jurina, who offers her a piece of toast and a banana as a peace-offering.
"Why am I up?" Rena grumbles as she swipes the banana and peels it carefully.
"We're going to go check on my place and I'm going to pick up some clothes and stuff," Jurina explains as Rena swipes the toast and throws the banana peel in the bin.
Rena's expression immediately brightens. "Because you're staying here, right?"
"Right," Jurina agrees and she's shoving Rena's jacket at her and throwing her keys, which Rena fumbles before holding them aloft victoriously with an adorable grin.
They pull up and manage to get inside without anyone noticing them and Jurina hurries Rena into her apartment. As she looks around, everything seems okay and she disappears into her bedroom to start throwing stuff into a bag. Rena ends up lying on her bed, giving her opinion on what Jurina should take until they've wasted two hours deciding on whether Jurina should take her lightwash jeans or whether she needs five white t-shirts. She checks her messages, finds that none of them are urgent and grabs her mail, shoving it into her bag as well and she figures she can open it at Rena's.
Jurina runs into a Starbucks on their way home and grabs lunch, stopping to sign a few autographs and pose for pictures and she's grateful no one can see Rena through her tinted windows kerbside, because otherwise they'd have a mob on their hands. She manages to finally escape and falls into the car, groaning. Rena's look is sympathetic and she pats Jurina's hand in compassion before pulling away.
It takes Rena most of the afternoon to get ready, while Jurina spends the afternoon going for a run and vegging out in front of the television. When Rena yells at her because she's not ready and they have to go in twenty minutes, Jurina jumps in the shower, spends two minutes doing her hair, checks her stubble is still in some kind of tidiness, throws on her lightwash jeans and a white t-shirt, throws on a jacket for good measure and she's good to go.
Rena wolf whistles as Jurina walks down the stairs. Jurina blushes because she's still not used to compliments, even after all this time in this band of theirs where they aren't afraid to discuss at length each other's butts, their hair, their eyes, their hands, their torsos and well, anything really.
"You look hot, Matsui Jurina," Rena announces and leans in to smack a wet kiss on her cheek.
Jurina's flush worsens and Rena's grin widens. Rena's in black skinny jeans and some kind of rainbow shirt which Jurina thinks is both awful and amazing and she's got those damn brown boots on that Rena loves but Jurina secretly wants to throw out with the trash.
"Maybe while we're finding me a cute girl, we'll find you a cute boy, what do you think Jurina?" Rena teases as she grabs Jurina's hand and tugs her out of the door. Rena lets her hand slip into Jurina's as they walk the short distance to Yuko's place. "You're looking pretty irresistible tonight, you know."
"Shut up," Jurina says fondly as she nudges Rena with her hip. Rena nudges her back and they're halfway to wrestling in the street before someone walks past them and Jurina straightens, grinning stupidly as she holds Rena in a headlock. "You gonna behave tonight Rena?"
Rena twists slightly so she can grin up at Jurina from her tenuous position. "Probably not," she admits honestly but she looks so adorable that Jurina just rolls her eyes and lets her go. Rena instantly moves back into Jurina's side and they turn the corner into Yuko's place, Rena's hand on Jurina's back and propelling her forward so that Jurina has to walk in first.
After introducing Jurina to what feels like a hundred people, Jurina finds herself on a sofa, squeezed between two people she can't remember the names of but she's had too many drinks to care. She's talking to them about food when she looks up and sees Rena talking to some girl. She's pretty cute, Jurina thinks objectively. She watches Rena laugh at something the cute girl is saying and she feels a twist in her stomach. Probably just had too much to drink. She stands up carefully, excusing herself politely and heads for the bathroom. She gets stopped twice on the way by people wanting to talk to her, which she can still never get her head around because she's at a party with lots of famous guests, so why anyone would single her out is beyond her, but she manages to lock herself in the bathroom eventually and splashes some water on her face, grimacing as she peers at herself in the mirror. Running her hand through her hair, she tries to put herself together and after a few minutes, figures she's good to go. She heads back to where she last saw Rena, only to feel something launching themselves at her back. Without turning, she reaches down to pat the hands locked around her waist.
"Hey Rena," she murmurs before turning in Rena's arms. "How's it going?"
"I've met some cute girls, Jurina.." Rena says happily and cuddles closer, dropping her head onto Jurina's chest and tightening her grip.
"That's great," and Jurina really does mean it, even if she kind of finds it irritating that Rena can find it so easy to just collect people. "But you probably shouldn't be hanging off me if you want to find a date, you know."
"My dates have to love you, Jurina or they're not worth it," Rena slurs carelessly as her hands drop to Jurina's butt and while Jurina's hardly surprised because the band grope each other all the time, she's reaching back to lift Rena's hands back up to her waist because it's not just the two of them here and if Rena's trying to find a nice girl to date, nice girls aren't going to go on dates with Rena if they see her all over another girl, no matter how innocent it is.
"How much have you had to drink?" Jurina asks suspiciously as she reaches up to cup Rena's face and forces Rena to look at her.
Rena giggles. "You gonna kiss me Jurina?"
"Okay, time to go," Jurina says firmly as she tugs Rena over to Yuko and says goodbye and thanks her for inviting them. Rena plants a sloppy kiss on Yuko's cheek and waves goodbye as Jurina pushes her towards the door. As soon as the fresh air hits her, Rena's whining and trying to curl into Jurina, seeking warmth. With a sigh, Jurina shifts so that she can wrap an arm around Rena's back and offers Rena her body warmth.
"You taking me to bed Jurina?" Rena giggles again as Jurina turns into Rena's driveway.
"Something like that," Jurina mutters as she fishes Rena's spare keys out of her jeans pocket and opens the door. She pushes Rena upstairs and pushes her gently onto the bed. She slips off Rena's boots and works on tugging her jeans off, cursing their bloody tightness and considers it a victory when they finally slide off. Rena's lost in her t-shirt as she tries to take it off and calls for Jurina to rescue her. Wondering how this became her life, Jurina tugs the shirt off her and wraps Rena in the covers.
"Hey, you come to bed too," Rena frowns as she reaches out to tug Jurina down.
"Not yet, you idiot." Jurina frees herself from Rena's long fingers and heads downstairs to get a glass of water for Rena, placing it on her bedside table. She then quickly strips and slips into bed but makes no move to cuddle Rena.
"Heeeeeeey," Rena whines as she tries to move into Jurina's space and Jurina fends her off. "What's wrong? Where's my cuddle?"
"No drunken cuddles," Jurina says firmly. "You get handsy when you're drunk."
"You love it when I'm handsy," Rena says coquettishly before she giggles and reaches out again, only to find Jurina's hands wrapped around her wrists, keeping her at bay. "Hey, this is kinky. You never mentioned your kinkiness before, Jurina."
Jurina stays silent and prays for patience.
"I wanna cuddddddddle!"
Groaning, Jurina turns around and wraps her arms around Rena, flexing her arms tightly so that Rena is imprisoned and can't move.
"We're going to discuss this kinky stuff you're into in the morning," Rena informs her with a yawn. "I think I like it. I definitely like your arms, Jurina. They're strong and they make a girl feel safe, you know?"
Jurina pushes down the weird bubble of feeling that appears in her tummy. "Go to sleep, Rena."
"Night Jurina. Love you."
"Yeah, you too, you idiot."
Jurina wakes up to find Rena's face inches away from her own. She blinks slowly as Rena's face comes into focus. Jurina finds herself admiring Rena's face, because it's a very nice face, and she can see why her female fans go crazy over her. Sometimes she thinks she goes a bit crazy over Rena because otherwise she'd be in her own bed right now, in her own flat and seeing her own friends. Yet here she is, sharing Rena's bed and just staring at her like some kind of crazy stalker.
"Morning," Rena's husky voice has Jurina lifting her eyes from where they'd rested on Rena lips to look up into curious black eyes. "Sleep well?"
"As well as I can with a handsy drunk," Jurina replies but her voice is soft and her tone is fond, so Rena just lets her lips curve into a gorgeous smile and Jurina finds her gaze drawn back down to look at it.
"Sorry Jurina, can't help it if you're irresistible when you're being all responsible and sensible and trying to get me into bed," Rena says and then bites her lip.
Jurina frowns as she watches Rena's teeth worry her bottom lip.
"Seriously, thanks for looking after me," Rena says and Jurina's gaze is still fixated on Rena's mouth so she watches as Rena moves closer and presses a soft kiss on Jurina's lips. Rena moves back and jumps out of bed, complaining that she needs a shower and Jurina is left lying in bed, staring after her.
When Rena emerges, she tries to persuade Jurina to go sightseeing. Jurina argues that they'll be mobbed as soon as they head outside together, because it's just about manageable when it's one of them, but Rena promises to dress inconspicuously and promises that she'll wear a baseball hat, an offer that Jurina can't turn down which is why they end up queuing to get on the Ferris Wheel. Rena leans on Jurina's back, looking over her shoulder and Jurina stands as still as she can to keep Rena upright, because Rena has the worst balance in the world and Jurina's braced to catch her if she starts sliding.
"Hey Jurina, do you know how anything about plumbing?"
"Uh, a little," Jurina offers, a little dubious. "Why?"
"The kitchen sink's been a bit clogged, didn't know if you knew how to fix it or whether I should call someone," Rena murmurs.
"I can take a look later when we get home," Jurina offers and she hears Rena saying something that sounds like thanks.
"Did you hear from any of those girls you met last night?" Jurina asks idly as she watches the wheel turn, craning her neck slightly to look up to the top of the wheel.
"Yeah," Rena mumbles and Jurina's pretty sure she's got her eyes closed and is two minutes away from falling asleep on her. "Two of them want to set up dates."
"I don't know how you do it," Jurina grumbles, annoyed once again at the ease with which Rena can find dates. "What did you say?"
"Nothing yet," Rena says and she follows Jurina as the line moves, keeping her head on Jurina's broad shoulders. "What do you think I should do?"
"Um, go on dates with them?" Jurina rolls her eyes and wonders how Rena gets through life, generally. "Go on a first date with both of them and see if you get on with them. If you do, pick whichever one you get on best with and go on another date. And if you enjoy that date, marry them."
Rena lets out a surprised laugh and presses a wet kiss on the back of Jurina's neck, which has Jurina shivering. "Straight to marriage, huh?"
"I think it's best that you don't have too many choices, Rena," Jurina says seriously. "You're rubbish when faced with choice. You can't even pick a movie, let alone a life partner. I think it's best to just settle down as soon as you can find someone to put up with you and your idiot ways."
"In that case, we should get married," Rena muses.
Jurina laughs. "Yeah, or you could marry Mayu or Takamina. Maybe not Sayanee, I don't think she could live with you for more than three months at a time, max."
"Dating sounds like a lot of work," Rena says with a sigh and Jurina turns around to look at her.
"But totally worth it," Jurina tells her and Rena smiles sadly. Jurina reaches out and hooks her hand around the back of Rena's neck, bringing her closer and resting her head against Rena's. "I promise. In six months when you're happily coupled off, I'll be more than pleased to tell you I told you so."
"Deal," Rena says and leans forward to press her lips against Jurina's briefly.
"Come on lovebirds."
Jurina and Rena jump at the muttered comment coming from somewhere further down the line as they realise the line has moved in front of them and they've been so wrapped up in each other that they haven't noticed. Flushing, Jurina steps away from Rena and mutters an apology before catching up. Rena slips her hand into Jurina's and grins up at her. "That was embarrassing, wasn't it Jurina?"
Rena spends the rest of their time queuing cooing at Jurina and pretending to be girlfriends, amusing herself while Jurina just pretends to ignore her. she carries on, all through the ride, snuggling up to Jurina, pressing kisses against her neck and cheek and any bare skin she can get to before Jurina shrugs her off, sneaking her arms around Jurina and calling her all the pet names she can come up with, her favourite being Jurina-beans, for reasons that completely escape Jurina.
"You really need to get laid," Jurina says as they walk away from the wheel, making Rena laugh loudly.
"Hey, I'm trying," Rena points out.
"Not with me!" Jurina says exasperatedly.
Rena gives her a funny look. "I meant with my dates, Jurina."
"Oh, right," Jurina says and pretends that she's not completely embarrassed . "Did you text them back?"
"Yeah, I'm going on a date tonight. Is that okay?" Rena asks hesitantly.
"Of course it is," Jurina says, punching Rena lightly in the arm and pushing away the sad thought that she'll have to spend the night alone for the first time in forever. Perhaps she'll call Churi and see if she's around for a catch up.
"I won't be late or anything, especially if she's an idiot," Rena says as she presses against Jurina and looks across at her through her eyelashes.
"You can be as late as you like, Rena," Jurina says reasonably. "Don't worry about me, seriously. I'll text Churi and see if she's around."
"Okay," Rena says and Jurina can tell from her tone that she's unsure. Jurina doesn't want her to talk herself out of going on the date so she shoots off a quick text to Churi, who replies immediately to say that she can meet her for a drink.
"See? I'm all sorted," Jurina says and is entirely grateful to have such a good best friend.
"But you'll come back home after, right?" Rena asks and she slips her hand into Jurina's unobtrusively.
Jurina squeezes it. "Yeah, course I will. All my stuff's at yours."
Rena just smiles and they head towards the Tokyo Tower.
Jurina has a great evening catching up with Churi. She only texts Rena three times to make sure she's okay, that the date is going okay and to see what time she'll be home. From what she can gather, Rena's date is very nice, she was punctual and Rena will be home by 10pm. Jurina's a bit dubious about how well the date can be going if she's going to be home that early, so she insists on leaving at 9.50pm, despite Churi's incredulous protests and heads home. The house is still empty so Jurina puts the kettle on, because Takamina has drilled it into the rest of them that tea is good for any situation and sits down, playing on her phone and trying to pretend that she's not nervous. Nervous in case it went well or nervous in case it went badly? Jurina pushes the rogue thought away and starts to drum her fingers against the table. When the door finally opens, Jurina jumps up and hurries to meet her. Rena looks normal, Jurina thinks, no tears but no foolish grins either.
"So?" Jurina thinks the wait is going to kill her, even though it's only been five seconds before Rena walked in.
With a shrug, Rena hangs up her jacket. "It was okay."
"Just okay?" Jurina asks, grabbing Rena's arm and dragging her into the kitchen and sitting her down while she pours the tea.
"Yeah, just okay," Rena says. "Don't think there'll be a second date."
Jurina ignores the weird leap her stomach makes and sits down, placing the tea in front of them. "Oh, well better luck next time, yeah?"
"Yeah," Rena says, taking a sip. "I'm having lunch with the other one tomorrow."
Jurina ignores the instinct to protest, because it's another few hours she'll have to spend alone, and seriously what was wrong with her? She's managed to fill her free time from tour and band duties very well in the past, so why is she even thinking about moaning when Rena dares to spend some time going on dates, something that Jurina has long thought overdue?
"Cool," is what Jurina manages to say. she sees Rena looking a little down and she reaches out to tug a curl. "How can anyone go on a date with you and it just be okay?"
Rena bites her lip and flushes, keeping her eyes down. "Dunno."
"If that were me, I'd be dragging off to the nearest bed," Jurina says with a teasing wink that Rena catches with a reluctant grin.
"Well, you do drag me to bed every night," Rena says with a straight face. Jurina pulls a face, which entices Rena to reach out and bop her nose.
"That'll have to stop when you start shagging one of your dates," Jurina says and tries to stay upbeat when really the thought makes her much sadder than it should.
"Yeah, I guess," Rena says and Jurina thinks she sounds sad too. "But not tonight."
"Nah, not tonight," Jurina says as she stands and puts the cups in the sink to wash up tomorrow. She turns around and shoves Rena towards the stairs, both of them giggling stupidly. "Tonight, I'll put up with your wandering hands and flailing limbs."
"You love it," Rena returns as they run up the stairs together, Rena chasing Jurina with absolutely no hope of catching her. "As much as I love your stupid snoring and deadweight arms draped around me."
"Don't really know why we don't just make up the guest bed," Jurina mutters although really that's the last thing she wants.
"Because I hate the guest bed and refuse to sleep in it," Rena points out as she strips and climbs into bed, picking up the remote and turning on the television and finding something silly to watch.
"No, for me, stupid." Jurina says as she climbs in the other side and grabs the remote and changes the channel to the football.
"Like I said, I refuse to sleep in it," Rena repeats and lays her head on Jurina's shoulder to watch the game.
Jurina refuses to acknowledge how that thought makes her ridiculous, stupidly happy. "I fixed the sink," she says quietly.
"You're the best," Rena says just as quietly and she reaches out to squeeze Jurina's arm in gratitude, and Jurina doesn't mind when Rena leaves her hand there while they watch Match of the Day.
When Rena disappears on her lunch date, after Jurina's sat through three outfit changes and Rena trying to change her mind whether to actually go which resulted in Jurina stealing Rena's house keys and pushing her out the front door, Jurina decides to go for a run. She's been slacking on her workouts since they've been home and she's suddenly got excess energy to burn. She runs through the streets of Tokyo, keeping her stolen-from-Rena-beanie-covered head down and just focuses on the beat in her earphones and the rhythmic thud of her trainers hitting the street. She runs until her lungs are burning and she runs until she can barely breathe. She runs until sweat is dripping down her face and down her back and her whole body aches.
She runs until she stops thinking about how Rena's date is going and whether she'll be home yet. When she finally heads home, she finds Rena sitting on her own doorstep, tapping her feet and texting. Rena looks up and her eyebrows raise slowly.
"Shit, I forgot I had your keys," Jurina swears, rummaging in her shorts for a key. "Sorry Rena."
"No problem," Rena shrugs and Jurina's glad she's the easygoing one because Jurina would have been pitching a fit by now. A quick glance at her watch tells her that she's been gone almost three hours. "You look sweaty."
"I am sweaty," Jurina mutters as she finally finds her keys and lets them in. "I need a shower."
Ahe disappears upstairs and spends far longer than she needs to in the shower. When she emerges, she finds Rena curled up on the sofa, still texting.
"So how did it go?" Jurina asks as she flops down on the chair opposite.
Rena looks up and frowns at her. "Yeah, it went okay."
"So why are you frowning? Okay is good, right?" Jurina asks as she closes her eyes and stretches her aching limbs.
"No reason," Rena murmurs but it has Jurina opening one eye to squint at her. "Well, what are you doing over there?"
"What am I- uh, stretching?" Jurina answers, bemused.
"Well, stretch over here," Rena grumbles. "Stop being unsociable."
Jurina shakes her head in disbelief but gets up and joins Rena, who yanks her down to lie across her, head in Rena's lap. "That's better."
"You know it's not unsociable to sit on different pieces of furniture, right?" Jurina murmurs but she's not really complaining when Rena's stroking her hair and it feels so nice.
"Of course it is when there's only two of you," Rena says like Jurina's being stupid. "Especially when it's us."
Jurina doesn't answer because she's half-asleep, the combination of a crazy workout and Rena's soothing touch lulling her to drowsiness.
"I don't think she's the one either," Rena says quietly and Jurina struggles to open her eyes, looking up at Rena to see her smiling sadly down at her. Jurina reaches up and strokes Rena's cheek, smiling as Rena leans into her hand and closes her eyes.
"That's okay, Rena," Jurina reassures her. "You'll find someone, I promise."
"Yeah," Rena whispers and they stay there for ages, Jurina's hand on Rena's face and Rena's hands in Jurina's hair.
Every time Rena goes on a date, Jurina goes for a run. After a week, Jurina's fitter than she's ever been and yet she continues to push herself every time. She needs to run to clear her head each time because she knows Rena is going to come back from her date quietly upset and disheartened and it's going to break Jurina's heart a little more. They've developed a routine of sorts where Jurina puts on Rena's favourite movie or television show to cheer her up and Jurina wraps Rena up as tightly as she can in her arms and they stay there until they're drowsy enough to fall into bed, exhausted. Jurina kind of loves it. And she thinks Rena does too because she traces the muscles on Jurina's arms and wraps her hands around Jurina's wrists and that's how they settle in together. When Takamina calls to say she's coming down for a visit and bringing Sayanee, Jurina spends the morning before they arrive bouncing around, cleaning and fussing until Rena pins her to the sofa. Of course, Jurina could escape if she wanted to but she enjoys Rena wriggling around on top of her and she likes seeing Rena grinning stupidly above her, so she stays where she is while Rena holds her wrists together. And that's how Takamina and Sayanee walk in on them. Of course Takamina has keys, because she treats Rena's place like her own when she's in town, so Rena and Jurina barely spare them a glance as Rena crows above Jurina.
"Interrupting something are we, girls?" Takamina asks, amused.
"Jurina was being her usual puppy self and running around chasing her tail in excitement, so I had to sit on her," Rena explains.
"Well, let her loose and come give us a hug," Takamina says fondly and Rena scrambles off Jurina, giving her a pat on the cheek before she climbs off and finds herself wrapped up in Takamina. When they pull apart, Jurina is tangled up with Sayanee on the sofa and Takamina tugs Rena so that they both end up on top of them and Jurina is glad she's strong enough to hold all three of them because otherwise she'd be pretty squashed right now.
"What have you two been up to?" Takamina asks when they finally let each other go and she's made tea for everyone.
"Loads of stuff," Jurina says, looking over at Rena with a smile.
"Yeah," Rena agrees. "We've been sightseeing, we've been to a couple of parties and we've watched loads of movies, right Jurina?"
"Lots of movies," Jurina says with a fond eye roll. "Rena's stocked up on weird-looking clothes so that she can be papped in designer shit."
"Heeeey," Rena protests and dives on top of Jurina, who just catches her and holds her hands together, laughing as Rena struggles to get free. Neither of them notice the look Sayanee and Takamina share.
"Wait, have you two spent all your time together since we got back?" Sayanee asks, a bemused look on her face.
"Yeah," Rena says, finally wrestling her hands free and pushing her hand against Jurina's chest to push her back. "Jurina kind of never went home."
"Rena convinced me to stay because she doesn't like to be alone," Jurina shrugs as if it's not unusual.
"So you've been living here?" Takamina clarifies slowly, glancing at Sayanee again.
"Pretty much," Jurina says.
"Jurina's a pretty good housemate," Rena leans forward and whispers to Takamina and Sayanee, as if Jurina can't hear her. Jurina ducks her head slightly to hide her beaming smile. "She fixes stuff."
"Oh really?" Takamina says and her tone invites Rena to reveal more.
"Yeah," Rena nods seriously. "And she washes up after I've cooked and she doesn't mind doing the washing."
At Takamina' stare, Jurina just shrugs and tries to pretend that she's not flushing. "Sounds very ... domestic," Takamina says slowly.
Jurina ignores the pointed look Takamina is giving her and turns the conversation round to what the other two girls have been up to. All day, Jurina is acutely aware of Takamina's stares. She's aware of it when Rena curls into Jurina and she's about to wrap her arms around Rena like usual but stops herself. She's aware when Rena announces that Takamina and Sayanee don't have to share because Jurina's been sleeping with Rena this whole time and Takamina' eyebrows can't possibly rise any further. She's aware when Jurina and Rena move around the kitchen and each other fluidly when Rena makes dinner because they do this every night and they have a routine. It's just that she and Rena have spent a lot of time together over this break, that's all. They've developed a rapport, not dissimilar to Rena and Takamina in the past.
When Rena reveals over dinner that she's been on some dates, Takamina immediately turns to Jurina and stares. While Sayanee talks to Rena about her dates, Takamina leans closer to Jurina and says quietly, "So how do you feel about your girlfriend going on dates with other girls?"
Jurina just stares at her, her eyebrows drawn together. "What are you talking about Takamina?"
"The fact that you and Rena have some weird love nest setup going on here. What the hell is going on, Jurina? You're living here, sharing Rena's bed, snuggling together on the couch, going on dates, playing house together. Surely you can see that this is a bit ... unusual."
"It's not like that," Jurina insists because it's really not. And she turns back to the conversation, deliberately ending the conversation, but she knows it's not over.
When they sprawl out in front of the television with their beers, Jurina doesn't think it's weird if Rena nuzzles into Jurina's neck or if Jurina's arm curls around Rena, because Jurina would do this with any of her bandmates. When they eventually stumble up to bed, hugging each other goodnight and Jurina and Rena crawl into bed together, Jurina doesn't think it's weird because she's shared beds with all of the band at one time or another. When she eases behind Rena and wraps one arm around her waist, she doesn't think it's weird because it's Rena and it just can't be weird. Jurina's final thought before she drops off to sleep is that it can't be weird because it feels so right.
When they wave Takamina and Sayanee off in the morning, Jurina tries to put aside the warning Takamina gave her when they hugged goodbye. "Just be careful, ok?" she whispered in Jurina's ear. "I hope you know what you're doing, both of you."
Jurina just squeezed her shoulders because even though she's wrong, Jurina appreciates that Takamina cares so much. When Rena presses a kiss against Jurina's cheek before turning to go back inside, Jurina's stomach totally doesn't swoop and she doesn't want to lift her hand to press against her cheek whatsoever. But Jurina is slowly noticing things that she didn't notice before. Like how much she and Rena touch. Jurina doesn't realize she's doing in half the time and she's pretty sure Rena isn't aware either, but they rarely go five minutes without reaching out to the other. Or how much Jurina hates talking about Rena's dates. She'd thought she just didn't like seeing Rena upset when they didn't work out, but since Takamina' visit, she's trying to be more honest with herself and that means admitting that a part of her doesn't want Rena's dates to go well because it means Jurina will have to go home and this closeness they've achieved, something closer than the bond they'd built in the past three years, would be lost. And Jurina feels particularly awful about this particular knowledge because she does want Rena to be happy and to be in a relationship that makes her smile and laugh and be endearing. But she can't finish that thought process out because she's pretty sure she's not ready to face that particular truth yet.
Every time she touches Rena now, it's different. She finds her hands lingering, unwilling to pull away from Rena and lose the connection. She makes sure she gets up first in the morning, not waiting for Rena to wake up before she jumps in the shower because when she wakes up to find Rena pressed against her, it's had an effect on the color of her face that she needs to address before Rena can see anything. She's not sure what to do. Logically, she knows she has to get out of the shower, get dressed and pretend for the next fifty years that she hasn't just had a sudden realization that could break everything in her life. her friends, her career, her Rena.
She at least manages the first step. She's dressed and out of the house within minutes, running harder than she's run all week. This time she doesn't just want to forget Rena's dates. This time, she wants to stop thinking about kissing Rena. Stop thinking about setting up house with Rena and yelling honey I'm home in a semi-ironic way every evening. She really doesn't want to think about the pitying look Rena's going to give her if she ever learns about Jurina's crush because Rena will be so nice about it all while breaking Jurina's heart. She keeps running until she almost passes out. Then she grabs a chocolate bar and heads home slowly, wondering what the hell she's going to do.
"Juuuurrriiiiinnnnaaaa!" Rena's throwing open the front door and staring at her in horror. "What have you done to yourself?"
"Running," is all Jurina manages to say because she's suddenly more breathless than she was before she almost passed out. Rena is standing in front of her and all Jurina can think about is pressing her lips to Rena's and going back to bed. But that's not going to happen, obviously.
"Get in," Rena says and grabs Jurina's shirt, yanking her forward. Jurina stumbles and almost falls on Rena but manages to save herself at the last second. "Damn, Jurina."
"Sorry Rena," Jurina says slowly as she tries to regain her balance.
"You have to go shower, quickly," Rena says with a wrinkle of her very adorable nose. Jurina wants to punch herself in the face.
"Yeah, I'm going," she says tiredly and trudges upstairs, belatedly realizing that Rena's following her.
"We've got a guest coming for lunch," Rena says quickly and it's enough to make Jurina's heart sink as if she knows what's coming.
"Oh?" she manages to say as she starts to strip off but she's so exhausted that Rena steps forward to help her and it's the worst possible thing to happen because Jurina has to force herself not to wrap her arms around Rena or breathe in her scent.
"Yeah, it's kind of maybe ... she might be girlfriend material?" Rena says and the hope in Rena's eyes just about kills Jurina. She can feel her barely-there smile slipping and just about keeps it in place.
"Wow, that's great Rena," Jurina says stiltedly. "I'll just jump in the shower then."
"Okay," Rena says brightly and leaves Jurina to step into the shower and bang her fist against the wall in pure frustration. On the very day she realizes that she wants to play happy families with Rena forever, Matsui Rena, is bringing her first girlfriend home for Jurina to meet. Her life sucks. It really, really sucks.
She climbs out of the shower wearily and throws on jeans and a t-shirt before heading downstairs. She freezes halfway down when she hears Rena's giggle and another voice. Oh God. She can't do this. She's feeling awful anyway because it's not every day you realize that you're in love with one of your best friends and there's no way she should be expected to smile and be nice to Rena's new girlfriend when really all she wants to do is growl and throw her out of the house before throwing herself at Rena and begging her to give Jurina a chance. But Jurina knows that Rena is relying on her and she can't let Rena down, no matter what. And there's a chance that this girl could be the love of Rena's life, as hard as it is for Jurina to even think about that possibility, so Jurina needs to suck it up, get through the next few hours and then head home to wallow in her stupidity for the next two weeks until they're back on tour. Jurina straightens up, plasters her best fake smile across her face - something she's grateful for all the media training for - and heads into the room, looking for all the world as if she can't wait to meet Rena's girlfriend.
Two hours later, Jurina's head is pounding and she wants to be sick. Rena's saying goodbye to her girlfriend while Jurina's sitting in the living room with her head in her hands. She wants to hate Yuki, she really does, but she seemed nice and she kept glancing at Rena and smiling and Jurina just wants to rip her head off because Jurina is apparently the jealous type and Yuki is so gorgeous and funny and she makes Jurina feel absolutely inferior. She watched Rena laughing and giggling and generally being adorable and Jurina thinks she might just keel over in heartbreak. She pulls herself together though, because really who dies of heartbreak on the same day they fall in love? She heads upstairs and starts throwing stuff into her bags and she's stupidly sad that it only takes five minutes to clear up all her stuff and erase herself from Rena's home. She trudges downstairs and walks into the kitchen, dropping her bags on the floor. Rena spins round and her face falls. she takes in the bags and Jurina's expression and she starts to shake her head. "No."
"It's time for me to go home, Rena," Jurina says as brightly as she can manage while her heart weeps a little. "You're going to want to have this place to yourself now that you have Yuki and you're too nice to throw me out, so I'm throwing myself out."
"Jurina," Rena moves over to her and reaches out to grab her hand but Jurina steps back, mostly for self-preservation. She ignores the surprised look in Rena's eyes and just shuffles around. "Jurina, please don't go, I don't want you to go."
"Come on Rena," Jurina says as gently as she can manage, trying to overlook the fact that her voice has inexplicably deepened. "This isn't a permanent arrangement. I have to go home. How would you explain to your girlfriend that you share a bed with another girl every night?"
"She's not my girlfriend," Rena says with a frown.
Jurina just shakes her head. "She wants to be your girlfriend. And you want her to be your girlfriend otherwise you wouldn't have introduced us. I think she's really nice, Rena." The words don't quite choke her. "You're good together."
"We're good together," Rena mutters and Jurina's heart breaks a little more.
"We're mates, Rena," Jurina says, mostly for her own benefit. "I know you're scared of relationships, and that's normal because it's a big step. You have to learn to trust someone and give your entire self to them and it's scary because you don't know for certain that it'll work out, but you have to try and you have to be open. And you cannot share your bed with anyone other than your girlfriend, no matter how good mates you are. Okay?"
"Jurina ..." Rena's voice sounds like it's coming from far away.
"I'll text you later, ok?" Jurina leans forward and presses a fleeting kiss on Rena's forehead, moving back before Rena can grab hold of her. "Thanks for letting me stay here, Rena. It was fun."
Jurina grabs her bags and hurries out. She doesn't look back. When she gets home, she crawls into bed and shuts her eyes, trying not to think about how lonely her bed is without Rena in it or how her sheets don't feel the same way Rena's do and they don't smell like Rena's do. Pushing it all aside because she's afraid she's going to go crazy, she wills herself to fall asleep and to start putting everything Rena-related into a big, black box labelled 'friends and nothing more'.
Three days later, Jurina thinks she's finally descended into crazy. She hasn't showered or gotten dressed since she's been home. She's watched stupid romantic comedies that make her shed a tear and she hates them so much but she's also slightly addicted to them. She hasn't left her apartment and she's sick of takeaway but not so sick of it that she wants to go outside into the world because she's not ready to face anything yet. All she can think about is Rena and how much she misses her, and until that goes away, she can't face anything else. She spends her hours thinking about what Rena's doing, who she's seeing, whether she's asked Yuki to be her girlfriend yet, whether Yuki's stayed over yet, whether Rena's making out with her or if they're fooling around in bed and that's why Jurina thinks she's actually crazy now. Her phone has rung several times but she doesn't want to answer it so she doesn't. It's probably just her mum or her sisters, and she really can't deal with them now. Sometimes there's a knock at the door but she doesn't answer that either.
It takes another two days before Jurina finally tires of takeout and gets in the shower. She emerges feeling a bit better but when she walks into the store, all she can think about is food shopping with Rena and how much fun it was. Jurina grabs a basketful of necessities and runs home, locking herself in once more.
The next day, she's woken by someone knocking on the door. She screws up her face and blearily looks at her watch - it's 11am. She switches off the television which is stuck on the menu page of the Love Actually DVD she'd been watching and stumbles towards the door. She couldn't be more surprised to see Takamina standing there, staring at her.
"Jurina, what the hell?" Takamina shoves her back and steps into the apartment and slams the door shut behind her.
"Hey Takamina," Jurina's voice is croaky from lack of use. "What brings you here?"
"The fact that you disappeared off the face of the planet and Rena won't talk to me or the other girls and you look damn awful."
Jurina just shrugs because she can hardly deny it.
"Come here," Takamina grabs her shoulders and pulls her close, wrapping her arms around Jurina, who just collapses into her. "Hey, what's this?"
"I screwed up," Jurina mumbles into her shoulder.
"Yeah, I know," Takamina sighs and rubs her back soothingly. "Come on, I'll make tea and we can talk about what an idiot you've been."
Jurina laughs a little brokenly and sits on the sofa, staring at nothing until Takamina places a cup of tea in her hands and sits next to her.
"So tell me," she invites.
"I might have, um, accidentally ..." Jurina stutters because she's not said the words out loud before and they scare her. "Well, you know."
"Fallen in love with Rena," Takamina supplies helpfully.
Jurina's shoulders slump.
"Well, she is charming and beautiful and adorable, all that shit," Takamina teases gently but Jurina's just withdrawn into herself. "Have you told her?"
She shakes her head. "I just realized it when Rena invited her new girlfriend round."
"Well shit," Takamina's sympathetic tone almost kills Jurina.
"Yeah," Jurina half-laughs but it sounds painful even to her. "Great timing, right? Not that anything would ever happen with me and Rena but still."
"Why wouldn't something happen between you two?" Takamina asks before slurping her tea to amuse Jurina. "You're fit, she's fit. You've got loads in common, you know each other's bad habits and you still fancy her, oh, and you've been playing girlfriends quite happily for the past few weeks."
"We weren't playing girlfriends," Jurina denies. "At least, not intentionally."
"It was clear as mud, mate, to me and Sayanee," Takamina tells her, softening her words with a kind smile. "And it wasn't just you."
"That's just Rena though, right? I mean you two used to be like an old married couple," Jurina says sadly because she wishes it wasn't true, that it was different between her and Rena but no matter how much she wished it, it didn't make it true.
"Yeah, but that was just us being silly and scared and clinging to each other," Takamina says. "You two were proper domestic. It was pretty cute, actually."
Jurina just attempts a smile but when it falters, Takamina' arms encircle her and she pulls Jurina into her body and they just stay locked together. "I hate it when you're like this," Takamina mutters.
Jurina sniffs and apologizes immediately, which just has Takamina tutting crossly. "No, you idiot. It's perfectly alright to be upset, I'm just saying I hate it because you're so bloody resilient most of the time so when you're like this, it makes my stomach hurt."
Jurina's response is to reach out and pat Takamina' tummy gently and it has Takamina laughing but she doesn't let go.
"I'm going to sit here with you all night and let you wallow," Takamina says softly. "Then tomorrow, you're going to shower, clean this place up because it looks like a pigsty, then we're going to get you back on track, right?"
Jurina just nods.
The next day, Takamina makes Jurina turn on her phone. She's got a few worried texts from Sayanee and one from Mayu, announcing that she's the Hokkaido pie-eating champion and she expects due adulation when they next see each other. She's got a few texts from her mum and sister, Churi sent her a funny picture and there are six texts from Takamina, all more irate than the last. Jurina looks at her sheepishly but Takamina ignores her. And of course there are a lot of texts from Rena.
Jurina, are you home?
Juuurrriiinnna, where are you?
Jurina, call meeeee!
Why are you ignoring me? :-(
Jurina? I miss you and your stupid arms :-(
I can't sleep. Text me!And that was just the first night.
What are you doing? Let's go do something fun!
Are you still alive?
I'm going to call Takamina if you don't respond.
Takamina's coming down in two days if you don't respond.
DID YOU HEAR ME? TAKAMINA'S ON her WAY
Jurina, seriously, are you okay?
You're not answering your door, so you must be out but call me, okay?
Oi Jurina, send me a text to let me know you're alive.
Juuuurrrriiiiiinnnnna. I miss you. I MISS YOU.Jurina feels a little guilty. Hell, she feels a lot guilty.
"Miss you, did she?" Takamina asks smugly.
"Only because she's lonely in that house," Jurina reasons but her heart is pounding a little. "I'm sure Yuki is making it easier on her."
"Funny thing," Takamina muses. "When she called me in a panic because you'd disappeared off the face of the planet, she didn't mention Yuki, not once. And when she called me yesterday and ordered me to come down to find you because she'd been round three times with no answer and she couldn't find you at your gym or with Churi or your parents or sisters or with the rest of us and there were no pap shots of you and she'd even gone on tumblr to see if anyone had caught sight of you, she still didn't mention Yuki. I didn't even know Yuki existed until you mentioned her last night."
"Perhaps I should text her, let her know I'm okay," Jurina says slowly.
"Yes, I think that's a brilliant idea," Takamina says with a straight face.
Sorryyyyy, been really busy. Takamina’s here nowwww.
She gets a response straightaway.
Don't move one inch, I'm coming over!
Jurina groans.
"That's my work done, I'm off," Takamina says and grabs her stuff, pats Jurina's cheek comfortingly and heads out of the door while Jurina's still stunned on the sofa. "I'll be at Sayanee's, call me after!"
It takes Rena exactly seven minutes to make it to Jurina's door, and Jurina's not quite sure how that's possible because she lives further away than that but the minute she opens the door, she's got a handful of Rena and she's falling back onto the floor with the momentum with which Rena hits her.
"Don't you ever scare me like that again, Jurina," Rena growls into her neck.
"Uh, I'm sorry?" Jurina offers but really she's just lost in the pleasure of having her arms around Rena and knowing that Rena was worried about her.
"You're such an idiot," Rena mutters. "You didn't have to give me so much space that you disappeared altogether."
"Oh, uh, no, okay," Jurina stutters. "Perhaps we can get up?"
"I'm quite comfortable here," Rena mumbles and her arms tighten.
Jurina's tighten as well and they're locked in a tangle of limbs.
"So, how's it going with Yuki then?" Jurina asks the question she's been dreading for the past week.
"Yeah, it's okay," Rena shrugs, burrowing her head deeper into Jurina's neck. "She's nice.."
"That's nice," Jurina manages and she's quite proud of herself despite the sick feeling in her stomach.
"I missed you," Rena lifts her head at last and her stare is hard and bright.
"We've spent longer apart than this," Jurina points out but her heart is racing.
"But it's different," Rena whines. "We've spent two weeks together, just the two of us, and the two months before that on tour. I miss you. Come back to mine."
"Rena, I'm not coming back to yours," Jurina says with a gentle roll of her eyes. "Come on. We talked about this."
"Yuki can just sod off then," Rena grumbles.
Jurina's body jerks in reaction but she sternly reminds herself that Rena's just kidding.
"I hope someone's warned her about your mood swings," Jurina teases as she gives into temptation and reaches up to tuck a curl behind Rena's ear.
"No, not yet," Rena grins. " she still thinks I'm adorable."
"More fool her," Jurina teases again.
"Hey, I am adorable!" Rena protests.
"Not nearly as adorable as you think you are," Jurina replies and tweaks Rena's nose. "Or as adorable as our fans think you are."
"Tell me I'm adorable," Rena orders as she grabs Jurina's wrists and holds them above her head and too late Jurina remembers that they're lying on the floor in her apartment, with Rena lying on top of her, bodies pressed together and Rena restraining her hands.
"You know I can flip you without even trying, right?" Jurina points out.
Rena grins happily. "I know. But you won't. You know why? Because I'm adorable."
"I'm still not moving in," Jurina says firmly.
"Fine," Rena huffs as she finally clambers to her feet and holds out a hand to help Jurina up. She slides her hand into Jurina's as she reaches back to slam the front door shut and tugs Jurina over to the sofa and quickly arranges them into Rena's favourite position. "But you'll come over and have dinner, right? And watch movies? And fix my broken stuff?"
"Rena," Jurina says warningly and she has to steel herself against Rena's pleading eyes. "I just can't, okay?"
"I don't understand." Rena's frowning and Jurina can see that Rena really and truly doesn't get it. It's both endearing and frustrating in equal measure, which pretty much sums up their entire relationship up to the moment Jurina moved into Rena's, when it progressed to intimacy and awareness.
"I know you don't," Jurina says tenderly as she reaches out to run her hand through Rena's hair and lets herself enjoy the feeling once more before she starts her Rena detox. "You should invite Yuki around for dinner and curl up in front of the television with her."
"Fine," Rena sighs as she reaches for her phone with her free hand and shoots off a quick text. She gets a reply within minutes and throws it down on Jurina's coffee table. "There, she's coming around tonight."
"You could sound a little happier about it, Rena," Jurina says with a gentle nudge. She knows that this is just Rena being Rena and when Yuki arrives tonight, Rena will have a much better evening than they've ever had together at Rena's home, but she still has to bank down a little frisson of happiness at Rena's sulking.
"I'll be happier when you cuddle me and tell me you missed me as much as I missed you," Rena says grumpily.
Jurina grins stupidly. "I missed you, you whiny, needy crybaby."
Rena turns and glares at her.
"Okay, okay," Jurina laughs and lifts her hands in protest. "I missed you. Lots."
"That's better," Rena beams and presses a kiss against Jurina's cheek. If Jurina flushes, it's okay because Rena's turned back and is fidgeting to get Jurina's arms around her the way she likes. Jurina grabs the remote and puts on some antiques show that she knows Rena likes and they waste most of the day lying together on the sofa, not really talking. Jurina has to practically throw Rena out when it gets late and Rena needs to be home for her date.
"Fine, I'm going," Rena pouts as she stands in the doorway and looks at Jurina. "But I'd rather be here. Don't forget Yuko's party tomorrow."
"Wait," Jurina reaches out to grab Rena before she turns and leaves. "What party?"
"Yuko's party tomorrow," Rena says slowly. "Did I not tell you?"
"No, in the six hours you've been sat next to me all day, you didn't once mention a party," Jurina says with a sigh. "What time?"
"Get to mine for eight, ok? We'll go together," Rena says and she's off with a little wave. "Takamina, Sayanee and Mayu are coming too. Miss yooooou!"
"Go away!" Jurina calls after her but ruins the sentiment with the utter fondness she can hear in her own voice.
When she closes the door, she forces herself to sit down and find something distracting to watch so that she doesn't have to think about what Rena's doing, because if she does, she might just break.
Jurina decides to get up and go out in the morning, so she goes for a run and after a quick shower, heads into the city to do some shopping. She signs some autographs and poses for pictures and manages to almost double her wardrobe in one trip. She gets a text from Takamina mid-afternoon asking how it went with Rena.
Went ok. She went home for a date wth Yuki. It’ll be ok, promise. See you tonight!
Jurina dresses in black jeans and one of her new t-shirts. It clings to her shoulders and hangs loose around her torso. she doesn't wear a belt and chooses boots to complete the outfit.She grabs a jacket on her way out and heads to Rena's, wondering whether Yuki's going to be there or not. When she reaches Rena's door, she reaches for her key automatically before she remembers that she doesn't live here anymore. She rings the doorbell and waits, her foot tapping nervously on the step as she waits. Sayanee answers the door, an odd look on her face that Jurina barely has a second to decipher before Sayanee's pulling her inside.
"Hey." she says quietly before she steps in for a hug that Jurina returns instinctively.
"Hey." Jurina echoes with a smile as they pull back to look at each other. "Ok?"
"Yeah, yeah," Sayanee says. "Come in, Mayu's in the kitchen and Takamina and Rena are upstairs dealing with some crisis."
"Oh, uh, everything alright?" Jurina glances up the stairs as they pass, resisting the urge to run up and check that Rena's okay.
"Yeah, it'll work itself out," Sayanee says and Jurina's not sure what she means but figures it's probably about clothes or hair.
"Jurina!" Mayu catches her in a bear hug and Jurina leans in, holding her close before letting move back a little but she keeps hold of her.
"How's home?" Jurina asks, grinning happily.
"Ah, amazing," Mayu says and pulls Jurina down to sit with her as she regales her with all the gossip from Hokkaido.
Sayanee disappears somewhere halfway through, and Jurina suspects she's already heard this at least once, and when she comes back in, she heads upstairs. Jurina watches her go and has to force her attention back to Mayu rather than whatever is going on upstairs. When she checks her watch, it's almost 9pm and she wonders what's holding them up. When she mentions it to Mayu, she just waves her hand carelessly and says something about them being down when they're ready. When Takamina comes into the kitchen, Jurina's surprised to see she's fairly subdued.
"Alright, Jurina?"
"Uh, yeah," Jurina answers with a frown. "You okay?"
"Yeah," Takamina answers distractedly and pats Jurina on the shoulder.
"Where's Rena?" Jurina asks and she meets Takamina' gaze.
"She's just getting ready," Takamina says. "She'll be down in a minute. You know what she's like, she likes an entrance."
"So is Yuki coming then?" Jurina asks idly, or as idly as she can manage.
"No, no she's not," Takamina responds and her hand returns to Jurina's shoulder to rub gently.
Jurina leans into her and that's how they stay until Rena emerges five minutes later.
"Hey Jurina," Rena greets her.
Jurina knows something's wrong. She can see it in Rena's eyes and the way her smile is a little forced. She knows it because Rena hasn't run in to throw her arms around Jurina, the way she has for the past four weeks. And she knows because Rena is standing in the kitchen doorway while Jurina is several paces away. In the past four weeks, whenever they've been in the same room, they've been within touching distance of each other at all times. They've gravitated towards each other, and she actually hates how far away Rena feels right now. God, no wonder Takamina picked up on Jurina's feelings so quickly. It would have been obvious to a complete stranger, let alone one of their closest mates.
"So, ready to go?" Takamina asks brightly as she slips her arm around Jurina's waist and squeezes gently.
Mayu grabs Rena and spins her around, ushering her out of the house, followed by a more sedate Sayanee. As Takamina pushes a reluctant Jurina towards the door, Jurina can't take her eyes away from Rena.
"Tamakina, what's going on?" Jurina asks in a hushed voice.
"Just Rena being a diva," Takamina says with a cheeky grin. "Nothing to worry about."
"Let's get trashed!" Mayu shouts as they turn into Yuko's road.
"Not a bad idea," Takamina admits to Jurina as they walk into the house and Jurina loses them all immediately.
It's okay though because Mayu's back within seconds, handing Jurina a drink. Shrugging, Jurina tosses it back in one and grins at Mayu, who whoops excitedly. Jurina stops at the fourth drink and switches to water. She hasn't seen Rena or Takamina all night, but she's caught up with Yuko, she's seen Mayu bouncing around and checking in and she's currently chatting to Sayanee outside while Sayanee drinks.
"You okay there?" Sayanee asks as she sips her drink slowly. Jurina gives her a look and Sayanee just returns it steadily. "What are you going to do about Rena?"
Jurina sighs heavily. "Slowly torture myself while Rena falls in love with some perfect girl who is probably great in bed and makes stupid jokes that make Rena fall about with that stupid laugh she does."
"Sounds like a hell of a plan, Jurina," Sayanee says sardonically.
"It's the best I can do, Sayanee," Jurina says heavily and she leans into Sayanee when she slings her arm around Jurina and takes another drag.
Jurina starts to round them all up when the party starts to fade. She has Sayanee look after Mayu and makes sure they stay near the front door. She searches high and low for Takamina and Rena but they aren't anywhere to be found. She knocks on every door in Yuko's place but no one has seen them. she knocks on the last door, Yuko's en suite bathroom and Takamina' face appears. she's blocking Jurina's view and steps outside, forcing Jurina back.
"You alright Jurina?" she asks cheerily.
"Yeah, we're just heading off," Jurina says distractedly as she tries to look past Takamina but she's being effectively blocked. "You coming?"
"Yeah, we'll be right down," Takamina says. she turns to go back in the bathroom when she spins around and throws her arms around a surprised Jurina. "I love you, you know?"
"Uh, love you too Takamina," Jurina says, patting her back and wondering exactly how much Takamina had to drink. "See you downstairs, ok?"
Takamina just nods and disappears, leaving Jurina staring at a closed door. Jurina heads back downstairs and finds Sayanee and Mayu where she left them. They chat quietly but Jurina's gaze is on the stairs, waiting for the girls to appear. When they do, Jurina's up immediately and moving forward before she can stop herself. She moves past Takamina and stops in front of Rena. Jurina waits for Rena to look up, worried and when she does, Jurina's heart stops because Rena looks wrecked. She steps forward and pulls Rena close, wrapping her arms around her, locking them tightly the way she knows Rena likes. She feels Rena freeze for a second before she softens and wraps her arms around Jurina and they stay there for who knows how long before Takamina is coughing and suggesting that they head home.
Jurina lets her arms drop but she slots her hand into Rena's and squeezes tightly. Rena doesn't squeeze back but Jurina feels her move closer and they walk slowly home, following the others at a distance. Jurina's desperate to find out what's wrong, but she can wait a bit longer until she can get Rena alone. When they turn into Rena's drive, Takamina already has the door open but the three of them are standing outside, waiting for them.
"Uh, we're going to head back to Mayu's place," Sayanee says quietly. "Leave you two to sort things out."
"Look after her, Jurina," Takamina says before Jurina can ask Sayanee what she's talking about.
"Yeah, of course," Jurina says as if Takamina's said something stupid.
Then they're gone and Jurina is left standing outside of Rena's house, holding hands with a clearly upset Rena. Jurina steps into the house and pulls Rena with her, shutting the door behind her.
"Sofa or bed?" Jurina asks, turning to look at Rena, who seems to be avoiding her gaze.
"Bed," Rena says quietly.
Jurina's seriously worried now, but she leads Rena upstairs and they change into their pajamas quickly before lying down together on the bed. "What's wrong Rena?" Jurina asks and she laces her fingers with Rena's. She sees Rena look down at their hands.
"Uh, Takamina says I should just be honest," Rena says and Jurina hates the vulnerability she can hear in Rena's voice. "I um, well, you know I saw Yuki last night."
Jurina nods and her throat tightens.
"Well, it was going okay but all I could think about was that she wasn't the right person," Rena says slowly. "She wasn't the right person at all."
"Oh, Rena," Jurina whispers and moves closer to rest her head against Rena's. "It's okay. You'll find someone, I promise."
"No, it's not..." Rena pauses and moves back so that she can look at Jurina. "Takamina promised me it would be okay to tell you and I know it is because you're the sweetest, nicest, most loyal person I've ever met."
Jurina tries not to get distracted by Rena's words and tries to focus on what Rena wants to tell her. "You can tell me anything, Rena, you know you can."
"Yeah," Rena says with a sigh. she lifts herself up onto her elbows so that she's looking down at Jurina. She reaches out a hand and strokes Jurina's face, smiling fondly when Jurina's eyelids flutter slightly. "Yeah, I think I can."
Jurina waits patiently because she knows it can take Rena a while to build up to what she wants to say. So when Rena starts lowering her head, she just waits with an encouraging smile. Rena keeps coming though and when she presses her lips against Jurina's, she's so surprised that she just freezes. She cannot move. She can't move when Rena moves back and looks at Jurina in increasing horror. She can't move when Rena makes a little noise that has Jurina blinking quickly. She can't move when Rena closes her eyes and swears under her breath. When Rena moves to climb off the bed, Jurina unfreezes and grabs Rena's arm in a vice-like grip, preventing her from moving.
"Damn it, I knew Takamina was wrong, I knew it," Rena was muttering as she pulled against Jurina's grip.
"Wrong about what, Rena?" Jurina asks, her voice husky.
"About this," Rena gestures between them, eyes a little wild, her hands shaking. "She said it would be okay. I thought it would be okay."
"Rena," Jurina pulls her close and Rena falls back onto the bed, finding Jurina leaning over her and looking down at her. "You just kissed me."
Rena shrugs, avoiding Jurina's gaze, neatly pinned in by Jurina. Heart racing, Jurina slowly leans down, echoing Rena's move and presses her lips against Rena's. When Rena's arms come up to encircle Jurina's shoulders and pull her closer, Jurina groans against Rena's mouth and Rena starts licking into her mouth eagerly. Jurina buries her hands in Rena's hair, letting her fingers get tangled in the curls. She feels Rena writhing beneath her and it's a turn on. One of her hands slips down Rena's body to grasp Rena's hip and her fingers dig in as Rena bites Jurina's bottom lip. Jurina groans again and she breaks the kiss. When Rena lets out a disapproving whine, which has a serious effect on Jurina's mental acuity, Jurina presses another kiss against Rena's lips before letting her mouth drift across Rena's jaw and down her neck, pressing soft kisses anywhere she can find bare skin. She finally lifts her head and looks down to see Rena gazing at her with sleepy eyes. She notes the smile playing on Rena's lips and she dips again to kiss her.
"Takamina's never wrong," Jurina murmurs with a smile and she grins happily when Rena lets out a quick giggle.
"We should talk, ok?" Rena asks and when she licks her lips and glances back down at Jurina's mouth, Jurina highly doubts she can even finish a thought let alone have a serious conversation. There's too much to say and they're both tired and emotional. They've taken a massive step forward and while Jurina can barely think past the fact that she's making out with Rena in Rena's bed, she knows they'll make more sense in the morning.
"Let's talk tomorrow when we're sober and I can think properly and string two sentences together," Jurina suggests and she sees Rena nodding in agreement.
"Yeah, tomorrow," Rena says and her voice has already turned sleepy. "But you'll stay, right? Here? With me?"
Jurina settles herself against the pillows and reaches out to pull Rena into her side, where she places her head on Jurina's shoulder and snuggles in, pressing kisses against Jurina's chest and giggling. "I'm not planning on going anywhere."
"Goodnight, Jurina," Rena whispers and lets her fingers trail across Jurina's chest, making her shiver and seriously doubting the wisdom in trying to get some sleep when Rena's all pliant and affectionate. Jurina sighs and forces herself to cool off. Plenty of time for that later, she thinks to herself. She tightens her arms around Rena, presses a long kiss against Rena's head, which makes Rena wiggle a bit and sigh happily, before they both relax almost in sync and she closes her eyes. They're both asleep almost immediately.
When Jurina opens her eyes, her hand is already outstretched, reaching for Rena. When she finds nothing but sheets, she sits up quickly and looks around but Rena isn't there. She pauses, listening to hear whether Rena is in the bathroom or downstairs, but the house is silent. She throws on her jeans and heads downstairs, hoping that Rena's lying on the sofa watching cartoons, or in the kitchen making tea, but she's not. Jurina races back upstairs to grab her phone, but there are no missed calls. No texts. She looks around but there are no notes. There's nothing. Jurina tries not to think the worst. She tries not to think about Rena freaking out when she woke up this morning. She tries really, really hard not to think about Rena having regrets about the night before. About Jurina. She tries really hard to think about everything she knows about Rena, about how sensitive she is and how she tries to put everyone else before herself. She tries to think about how deeply Rena loves every single one of them, and how she's never deliberately hurt anyone in her life. She tries not to think about how Rena might be breaking her heart. It's so much to not think about that Jurina climbs into bed, shuts her eyes and tries not to think about anything at all because all she can do is lie here, in Rena's bed, and wait for her to come home.
After three hours of staring at the ceiling, Jurina decides that she can't wait any longer because Rena clearly isn't coming home and she dresses as fast as she can and runs all the way home, ignoring the stares of passersby, who hopefully just think she's doing the run of shame and don't pay any attention to the fact that she's one fifth of AKB Band and doing the run of shame. She jumps in the shower and just stays under the spray, turning up the temperature until it's painful and harsh on her skin. When she drags herself out, she's red raw and the pain is now as external as it is internal. But she's trying not to think about that because she knows there's a reason. She knows Rena wouldn't do this to her, not deliberately, because she didn't just imagine Rena kissing her last night. All she had to do was be patient. Rena would call her and explain everything and they'd talk everything out and they'd be okay. They had to be okay. Jurina doesn't know what she's going to do if they aren't okay. She dresses and lays down on the sofa, staring up at the ceiling, her phone resting on her chest so that she can check it every few minutes. When her phone finally vibrates, she grabs it and looks at the text message. It's Rena.
Hey, meet me at AKB Garden in 30 minutes? Wear something smart. I'll explain everything. Can't wait to see you .xxJurina's up and stripping off before she even processes Rena's text. She changes into a nicer pair of jeans, wears a button down shirt and grimaces as she slips her feet into a pair of lace ups. She's so desperate to just see Rena that she doesn't care that Rena basically abandoned her for a whole day because she knows if she just sees Rena, it'll sort itself out.
She arrives right on time, seeing Rena standing by the station trying to look inconspicuous. Jurina moves towards her and she sees the exact second Rena spots her. her dimples flash and Rena's moving towards her. They stop inches away from each other and Jurina's grinning stupidly because Rena is beaming. Rena grabs Jurina's hand and tugs her down a side street and into what seems like a dark house but Jurina realizes it's a restaurant that is deserted. Rena guides her towards a table near the back and waits for Jurina to sit, bemused, before Rena sits as well.
"Hey," Jurina says because she's suddenly nervous and she needs to fill the silence.
"Hey," Rena echoes, before she's grinning again and leaning forward. "You look great, Jurina."
Jurina flushes. She can't help it. She's not used to Rena giving her compliments, they're more likely to yell insults at each other's choice in clothing. She finally notices that Rena's in a dark shirt and jeans. "You look great too, Rena."
Jurina watches as Rena blushes and looks away, and she thinks it might just be the most adorable thing she's ever seen in her life.
"So you're probably wondering where I've been today," Rena says eventually after they've been staring and grinning at each other for a few minutes. Or possibly hours.
Jurina nods slowly.
"I've been planning this," Rena says, gesturing to the restaurant. "It's all ours, tonight."
Jurina's eyes widen. "Wow."
Rena giggles. "There's more, Jurina," she says with an eye roll. "I haven't spent all day hiring a restaurant."
"Oh good," Jurina says with a relieved sigh and crosses her eyes, making Rena laugh.
Rena reaches out her hand and lays them on the table, palms up. She looks at Jurina and she looks calm, Jurina thinks. She reaches out and places her hands in Rena's and Rena closes her hands, letting her thumbs run back and forth over Jurina's hands.
"So we should talk, yeah?" Rena asks for the second time and Jurina nods. "So you've probably guessed that my date with Yuki went spectacularly badly."
Jurina frowns, because she hasn't really thought about Yuki at all, to be honest.
"I just kept thinking that it wasn't right because she wasn't holding my hand like you do, and she wasn't laughing at my stupid jokes like you do, and when we were on the sofa, watching some terrible film that Yuki thought was hilarious, her arms were round me and I just couldn't bear it. They weren't your arms and she didn't feel like you and then I kind of freaked out and Yuki left and basically I don't think we'll be seeing each other again," Rena says and Jurina thinks she's leaving out a lot of information. "So I called Takamina who came over and after I explained that I didn't think it would work with Yuki, Takamina asked why," Rena continues and she looks up to smile sweetly, which has Jurina squeezing her hands. "Well, Takamina said that perhaps I was looking in the wrong place for a girlfriend. I told her I didn't know where to look then, but she just gave me a weird look and asked what I wanted in a girlfriend. So I listed all the things I wanted, and she asked if perhaps there was already someone who did all those things, who was all those things."
"Yeah?" Jurina prompted.
"Yeah," Rena says simply. "Turns out that person was already right in front of me. Fixing my problems, staying in my bed, taking me on dates and looking after me. The only thing was, it was completely platonic. And Takamina made me realize that I didn't want it to be platonic. So I freaked out again because I screamed at Takamina that you were straight, you had boyfriends and you fancied boys and when I finally stopped shouting, Takamina told me that I was an idiot and anyone could see that you and I were, like, practically a couple."
"Yeah, Takamina had to tell me that we were basically girlfriends before I realized it as well," Jurina says with a smile. "So we're both idiots."
That makes Rena grin stupidly. "So basically I spent most of yesterday freaking out and then when I saw you in the kitchen, I just wanted to go over to you and have you put your arms around me like you usually do, except I also wanted to kiss you stupid. So when we made it to the party, I dragged Takamina upstairs and she spent most of the night telling me to just go for it and I just worked myself up until I freaked out again."
Jurina waits but Rena seems to have said all she wants to say. "Did you freak out this morning?"
Rena shakes her head solemnly.
"Are you planning to freak out at any point tonight?" Jurina asks and she lets a little smile slip past her lips.
Rena shakes her head, grinning.
"So you're all done freaking out?"
"Totally calm," Rena confirms.
Just then, a waiter appears and Rena orders two glass of wine. Jurina scans the menu and they order. Jurina waits for their wines to arrive and the waiter to disappear before she looks back at Rena.
"So you're okay then, with this?"
Rena shakes her head. "Jurina, it's crazy how okay I am with this."
Jurina can't stop the smile that stretches her cheeks so much that they start to ache. Rena laughs and she's grinning too and they're just two idiots, grinning at each other.
"So what are we doing after dinner?" Jurina asks finally. "Or are we staying here?"
"I have a few plans," Rena says mysteriously and Jurina lights up.
"Oh, I love surprises!" Jurina bounces up and down and Rena just looks at her fondly.
They enjoy dinner, laughing and flirting and touching each other as much as possible. When they can't touch hands, Rena's foot is rubbing against Jurina's calf and Jurina's leg is stretched out to rest against Rena's leg, tangling together. Rena offers Jurina a bite of her chicken and laughs when it falls off Rena's fork before Jurina can lean forward. Jurina cuts a piece of her steak and puts it on Rena's plate, arguing that it's safer than trying it Rena's way, while Rena argues that it's not romantic and Jurina says that chicken that's fallen on the table isn't romantic at all. They skip dessert and Rena pays the bill, ignoring Jurina's protests. When they stand, Rena reaches for Jurina's hand and curls her own around Jurina's. They smile stupidly at each other before Rena leads her out of the restaurant. They walk through the streets, Jurina letting Rena guide the way, just happy to be holding Rena's hand and sharing stupid, secret smiles with each other. Rena stops outside a theatre. Jurina looks up, confused, because it looks closed.
"Uh, so this is kind of all ours for the night as well," Rena says shyly and Jurina laughs at Rena's utterly endearing version of date night.
"What are we watching?" Jurina asks as Rena pushes the door open and she smiles charmingly at the girl behind the counter.
"It's a surprise," Rena says and winks at the girl, who blushes. "Do you want popcorn?"
Jurina just raises an eyebrow and Rena grins as she reaches out to grab some chocolate. "And butter popcorn and a large coke."
Jurina nods in approval and tries to pay once again but Rena just glares at her as she hands over the cash. They walk into the theatre and Rena picks seats in the back row, although Jurina protests that they've got the screen to themselves so they could just as easily sit nearer because no one is around anyway. When Rena pouts, Jurina gives in and follows her to the back row.
The film starts as if by magic and Jurina chuckles when she hears the familiar theme. "You chose Toy Story?"
Rena grins. "I know you've seen it a million times, but this is our first date and I wanted it to be perfect."
"It is perfect," Jurina says earnestly and she can't resist the urge to lean forward, cupping Rena's face in her hands and placing a kiss on Rena's lips.
Except then they both forget about the movie and the food and spend most of the movie making out and copping feels that Jurina feels slightly guilty about because really they're still kind of in public but then Rena's hand is in her lap again and Jurina forgets what she was thinking about anyway.
"This is the best first date ever," Rena says as she presses a kiss against Jurina's neck, grinning when Jurina shivers.
"Absolutely," Jurina agrees as she pulls Rena closer for a kiss.
"We should probably talk about how this is going to affect the band and stuff," Rena murmurs against Jurina's mouth.
"Yeah, probably," Jurina's distracted by Rena's hand moving lower and hovering over Jurina's lap. "Maybe we should go home."
Rena beams and presses a quick kiss against Jurina's mouth. "Yeah, let's go home."
"Unless you had something else planned?" Jurina asks as she kisses Rena.
"Just a karaoke bar," Rena murmurs.
Jurina groans. "Next time, ok?"
"Yeah," Rena agrees as she stands up and hauls Jurina to her feet.
"Seriously Rena," Jurina pauses and Rena stops, her hand in Jurina's. "This was the best date. Thank you."
"I just wanted to do something special, you know?" Rena says and Jurina steps closer and kisses her gently. "I know we weren't dating when you were staying at mine, but you were kind of the perfect girlfriend anyway and I wanted to show you that I can be pretty good at this stuff too."
"Rena, you don't have to show me anything," Jurina says softly and Rena wraps her arms around Jurina's waist. "You just have to be you and I just have to be me and together we'll work it out, yeah?"
"Okay," Rena says happily and leans her head against Jurina's chest. "But when we get home, I can show you how fit I think you are, right?"
"Definitely," Jurina agrees. "It's actually kind of compulsory."
"And if you wanted to lift me in your stupidly strong arms, that'd be okay," Rena murmurs and Jurina grins.
"Okay, Rena, that's good to know."
"And while I don't normally put out on the first date, I think you might be in luck tonight," Rena says and she's tugging Jurina towards the door. "Because really, we've been dating for over a month now."
Jurina's still laughing as Rena hails a cab and they fall inside, limbs entangled.
"Okay, but when we celebrate our anniversary, I'm counting it from today," Jurina warns her.
"Anniversary," Rena repeats quietly and her eyes go soft.
Jurina just rolls her eyes, checks the cabbie isn't looking and yanks Rena towards her, kissing her senseless.
OS # 18 Girlfriends (Wmatsui OS)
END