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Konichiwa~! :deco:
It has been a few days since I posted my first oneshot in this website and it got some positive feedbacks. So thank you for the people who read it! :heart:
I've decided to make a list of stories from oneshots to chapter fics. It'll br fun to put some here and see how many people would like it!
So this list will began with a sad WMatsui oneshot I originally posted on Tumblr.
I hope you guys like it! ^^
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Six Degrees of Separation
I’ve heard about it before. The six degrees of separation. A lot of people, including close friends told me about it. They said it will occur during and after relationships. They said that these are the steps you will take after your relationship ends. From depression to regret. From your world splitting down in the middle to seeing your past lover in love with someone else.
To me, these are just rumors. To me, the people were just exaggerating. I never believed them from the very beginning.
I always thought my love for her will never end. That we could keep up this relationship for as long as I dreamed of.
But it was only a dream.
I should had believe it before I saw it coming. Now, I’m left here with my heart shattered to pieces.
Rena and I were always a happy couple. Our friends always mock about our relationship and would start talking about marriage and having children. The thought made both Rena and I blushed in the deepest shade of red. To be honest, we actually never thought of taking our love to a whole new level. We always thought it was best that if we take it slow and easy. I silently blame Airi for having such a pervy mind ever since. I always thought to myself where does she got those stuff from. She’s a girl with a mystery.
But with that away, we continued our relationship. Days to weeks, weeks to months. Everything was going smoothly, no fight and no hidden secrets whatsoever. We were living the ‘WMatsui’ dream, as what fans called it.
Then… came the problem.
I wasn’t suspicious at first, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t pay attention. For the past few weeks, Rena started to make up excuses to cancel our activities that I had planned since the day before. I thought it was something urgent, so I let her go. It started to escalate, until it became a daily routine. We barely had anytime together during those weeks.
I started to investigate what she was doing from the past week. I followed her from her house, and kept following her until she entered the local mall. She then went into a certain clothing shop and there, I saw Airi, waiting patiently.
It was finally revealed. Right after they greeted with an embrace, and a long kiss on the lips, I knew what was going on.
I walked home with patience in my chest, holding onto the anger that was slowly going to rise up. As I finally made it home, I texted her to come to my house tonight. She replied with an ‘Okay’, adding a cute emoticon in the end. She was trying to act all innocent, but I already knew about it. I kept controlling my anger until it was night.
At the exact time the clock strikes seven o’clock precisely, I heard a knock at the front door. I opened the door, revealing Rena with a cute smile planted on her lips. She hugged me and gave a peck on my lips. Somehow it felt alien. As if, it felt so unusual.
I made her sit down on the couch while I made some tea. After I set down the two cups of tea on the table, I told her.
I told her about everything of how I saw her and Airi together in a couple like manner, leaving out the part where I followed her since she step foot out of her house. She had this.. odd emotion. I don’t know if it was shock or something else. But I still continued.
After a moment of silence, the sound of the clock ticking was the only company I heard. She finally spoke.
I could never forget her words.
"Jurina… I love Airin now."
A sudden pain emerged from my chest, feeling my heart breaking after the words she had said. So it was true. She does love Airi. I started to question the months of us in a relationship. Did she just dumped it in the trash and a found a new one instead? I’m not sure, and I remembered starting to get mad and began to shout at her.
The argument last for a quite a long time. The cups of tea were remained untouched, as it was just on top of the table with the cold air surrounding us. I silently prayed that my neighbors won’t hear us arguing.
But in the end, she only said this.
"I love Airin now, Jurina! And that is final!"
She stormed off of my house, leaving me with a broken heart. And I didn’t bother to drink my cup of tea as I just set them on the sink and went straight to bed.
Our love ended after that night. We don’t need to exchange texts to know that we had finally broken up. We already knew it after the argument the night before. And what make things even worse, Rena seemed to be happier with Airi now.
Every day I would go to dance practice, I always see them being all lovey dovey and happy as ever. I kept frowning every time I see them, and I kept a bad mood the whole day. The routine would repeat every day, and it annoys me so badly.
My love towards Rena is still there. I hate it.
Though, I hate myself now after weeks of seeing them happy together. I know it’s my fault. I know I’m still in a young age and love is still new to me, but at least she could give me a chance to change. Give me a chance to know a bit more about love. I guess fate doesn’t go like that and look where I am now.
That’s when I start to cut myself.
I would always get concerned looks and talks from Churi. Even Yukirin, who visited a few days ago, told me to stop. But I didn’t. I kept going and going, telling the same lie everyday.
I know should be blaming Rena. But… I just couldn’t.
I now know what it feels to be go through the six degrees of separation. It hurts so much.
First, you experienced a broken heart. Second, it what kills you the most, seeing the person you love loving someone else. Third, you felt as if your world splits down the middle. Fourth, you think you finally fixed yourself. But then fifth, you see them out with someone else even though you wanted to be the person that they love so much.
And last, the sixth final degree.
I know that I have fucked up a little. Maybe a lot more than that.
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ah, how sad poor jurina..
Rena love airin now not jurina anymore
intresting os though
keep up the good work!
i hope you write more wmatsui os!
d^.^b
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This can't end like this. Please :cry:
But nice story.
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Hey! :welcome
I'm back, but this time with a different story! :twothumbs
This will be my first ever Atsumina fic, since I usually write WMatsui. I hope you guys like this! :deco:
Oh and... Should I make another oneshot for Six Degrees of Separation?
Anyways, enjoy! ^^
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Ever Enough (Part One)
I still remembered the first day I met her.
It was during auditions for the first generation. I was really such a shy and nervous person, that I didn’t really expect to pass the audition. It was surprising. I remembered how I was such a nervous wreck. I guess, hard work really does paid off. The next day will be the first day of practice, but somehow I was very prepared.
It was intense. The practice, I mean.
The choreographers were really difficult to do and everyone was trying their best to memorize them. During breaks, everyone started to introduce one another and started acting like best friends. Though, I was still shy. So I kept my mouth shut.
The first day of practice finally came to an end and I was really exhausted. Everyone went home faster than I was, so I thought I was the last person to go home. Until, I heard the speakers playing. It was the same song that I did during practice. Confused, I walked in the dance room to see who was practicing.
Sweat streaming down her face, a look of determination, and soaked training attire. This was the first time I laid my eyes on Takahashi Minami.
She never stopped. Whenever she failed on attempting a dance move, she gets back up and starts from the beggining. I continued to look at her in admiration. I never seen someone so determine and so focused on something until I saw her.
I know staring at her isn’t going to help me getting to know her better. So, building up the courage inside me, I slowly walked towards her. Lucky for me because she was about to take a break.
Wiping the large amount of sweat on her face and neck, she took out what appeared to be her water bottle from her bag and chugged the cool liquid into her mouth. She didn’t notice me walking towards her from behind.
I stopped at a certain distance and took a deep breath. With all my courage, I spoke.
"Hi."
Her back turned and now she was facing me with a surprised look. I guess she thought everyone else went home and she was the only one in the dance room. Her cheeks puffed out since she still had water in her mouth. I tried my best to hold back my laughter.
She swallowed the water in her mouth, and gave me a somewhat shy smile.
"Hi." Her voice was soft and innocent. Kind of like an angel.
Trying to avoid any awkward situations, I looked around the room to see if there was anyone still practicing with her. But there was none. With the thought in mine, I asked her. “Aren’t you going to go home? You know, everyone just left a few minutes ago."
Suddenly, her shy smile turned into a frown. A sad frown, to be exact. I wondered why she did it until she replied.
"Sensei told me that I was a bit slow. I wasn’t able to keep up like the others. So after practice, she told me that I have to stay behind for another hour so that I could improve. And so, here I am," She said, with a dissapointed voice as she waved her arms wide to describe the dance room. Somehow, I felt bad for her. I knew I just met her and all, but I couldn’t help but felt some sort sympathy towards her.
I nodded my head in understandment. The thought of going home suddenly dissapeared. I knew if I go home, she would be alone and there would be no one to accompany her while she’s practicing. That’s why I knew what to do next.
I walked towards the bench and placed my black backpack next to her pink one. I could felt her eyes looking at me confusingly as I made my way to the speaker. My index finger pressed on the play button and the music started to play.
"Wait, what are you doing?" She asked confused by my actions. I gave her the sweetest smile I could gave.
"Well since you’re practicing alone, I was thinking that maybe I could join you. I think you might need a good dancing partner," I said still wearing my sweet smile.
She looked at me with a shock expression. I guess she never expected a stranger like me to do something nice for her. I knew that she owed me. But that wasn’t important anymore. At least she has someone to accompany her. She smiled, and I thought it was one of the brightest smile I had ever seen.
"T-Thank you… I don’t know what to say…" She was speechless. And it made me giggle on how cute she was when she’s speechless.
"It’s no big deal. Oh, and I forgot to introduce myself. I’m Maeda Atsuko, but some of my friends call me Acchan. You can call me by that nickname if you want," I said, extending my head towards her.
"I’m Takahashi Minami, though my friends call me Takamina. It’s really nice to meet you." She took my hand with hers and shook it firmly. There was a sudden bolt of electricity as her hand shook mine. As if our hands were magnets.
I smiled. “Nice to meet you too."
Thus a friendship was born.
~~~
Minami and I were really close. Inseperable was the right word. After our first meeting, we became the best of friends. I don’t know why though. I just… never been this close to anyone before. Not even my parents or my friends. I always kept my distance to people, but I don’t know why I was opening up to Minami. Maybe it was her personality, her smile, her height? The last one was a joke, but I still don’t know what was the reason. But I liked it. And all that mattered.
Ever since then, we never left each other’s side. She always had my back, and I had hers. Everywhere I go, she would always followed and vice versa. It was like we were really inseperable. As if we can’t live without each other.
Over the years, we opened up a bit and made some friends in the group. One of them was Sae. I don’t know what sparked our interest for Sae. Maybe it was her boyish style hair. I don’t know. She was really nice and could help a friend who needed any help or comfort. Minami said that Sae would be handsome if she was a boy. I couldn’t agree more.
There was also Mayu and Yuki. Mayu was an otaku and she has this cyborg expresion most of the time. She also has a weird obsession for ‘oshiri’, just like Yuko. Yuki, or Yukirin as I like to call her and Mamarin by Mayu, was a sweet girl with fat cheeks everytime she smile. I found it cute, even though I never told her in person. I love watching them having playful fights. They look so adorable while doing it.
Even with having other friends, my relationship with Minami stayed the same.
Our really close relationship was really open. And eventually, other members kept talking about us. I heard some from Yukirin. The other members thought that we looked like some sort of couple. Mayu even called us ‘Atsumina’ or ‘Takacchan’ as Sae liked to say. We both thought it was ridiculous and we ignored it.
Though, I agree that we looked like a ‘couple’. Most of the time, I would sneak up on Minami and surprised her with a tight embrace from behind. I would even gave her a peck on the cheek if I had the chance. Her reaction was priceless. But she would always had a way to get revenge on me.
Even if our relationship was really close, it had its ups and downs. But we still had a way to manage and kept our relationship steady. Even if it has bumps in the way.
Years has passed and our relationship kept getting stronger. Not only that but AKB’s popularity and recognition increased. That means more fans to meet, more events to attend to, more dance practice, the list goes on. This was everyone’s dream; to push AKB to the very top. Not in a selfish way but you get what I mean.
But even with all of this… my dream of becoming an actress never left my mind. And with each day doing things in AKB, it was starting to get boring.
Eventually, a graduation for myself insued. And Minami wasn’t really happy about it.
I told everyone to not tell Minami yet until it was the right time for me to tell her. But somehow, someone did told her. I didn’t blame the person who told her the news, though.
After dance practice one day, Minami told me that she wanted to talk to me privately with a blank expression. So I took her to my house. But the moment I closed the front door, she started yelling at me. I still remembered how the conversation went.
"Why didn’t you tell me, Atsuko?!" She only called me by my first name if it’s about something serious.
"Minami, just try to calm down for a moment…"
"Calm down? How could I calm down when my own best friend didn’t tell me about her own graduation?!"
I could her tears trickling down her eyes. I never seen her cry before. Minami was an emotional person, but she never cries in front of me before. This was the first time I had seen her tears
"Minami, please calm down for a moment, okay? Let me explain…"
She only nodded.
I sighed. “Look. I know it’s wrong for me to not tell you earlier. But I know that if I told you, you would be a lot worried about it."
I heard her scoff.
"I know AKB is a big part of my life and it helped with a lot of things too. But… doing the same thing every day, it gets boring don’t you think? That’s why I want to graduate, I could do so many things everyday than just doing one. I want to live my dreams, Minami." I took a deep breath. “Do you understand now?"
She looked up at me with her teary eyes. She looked really furious.
"Idiot…" She mumbled
"Pardon?"
"You idiot. Do you ever think about other people’s feelings for just one day? Do you, huh?" She pushed me back hard enough that my hit the door. “I can’t believe after all these years, you are still oblivious!"
"What do you mean?" I was really confused.
There was a moment of silence before she took a deep breath.
"I don’t want you to leave me alone!"
It finally hit me like a ton of bricks.
Unexpectedly, she lunged herself towards and gave me a tight embrace. Then, she started to cry on my shoulder. Her hot tears continued to spill on my shirt. Her sobs began to grew louder and louder each time. Just seeing her like this made my heart break. I hate it.
Slowly, we both sunk to the floor as Minami continued to cry in my arms. My arms reached her back and finally returning her embrace. Her sobs were loud enough until it echoed throughout the room.
"Please don’t leave me alone, Atsuko… Please don’t leave me alone…"
She repeated this over and over as if it was some sort of chant. All I could do was rubbed her back and tried my best to calm her down.
"I won’t leave you. I promise." That was all I could say.
We stayed like that for hours, not talking nor moving. Once she stopped crying, she asked me if I could stay the night in my house. I immediately said yes, afraid that if she went home, she might do something horrible.
We went to bed shortly after what happened. We didn’t even bother to change our clothes. She told me that she wanted to sleep with me, and I gladly accepted it.
Our bodies were so close to each other as we laid there in bed in silence. Neither one of us said or do anything.
Eventually, we drift off to sleep.
I’m really sorry, Minami.
~~~
It has been a two years since I left AKB.
And so far, it had been great.
Apparently, a lot of people recognized me from AKB and asked me if I wanted to join in various movies and dramas. I happily accepted their offers. It was hard at first, but I starting to get the hang of it. My dream of becoming an actress finally came true and I’m happily living it. My popularity increased. Along the way, a lot of actors and artists started to be my new friends. They were all generous and kind that I accepted them to be a part of my life.
But with all the fame and popularity that was happening, I missed the presence of Takahashi Minami.
I missed everything about her. Her smile, her laugh, her cute pout. Everything. I missed being with her. I missed our close relationship. But now we were living in two different worlds.
I really wanted to see her. I really do. I really want to feel her tight embrace. I really want to see her smile. But somehow, my always full schedule won’t allow that to happen.
So I waited. I waited until fate came down and gave us a chance to meet again.
But fate did it very differently than I thought it would be.
It was mid July, on a Friday afternoon. I had a day off, so I thought it would be best if I spend my day by watching TV and scrolling through my laptop in my beloved home. I haven’t moved to a new place, and I never will. My current residence felt rather comfortable.
As I watched a rerun of my favorite TV drama, I wasn’t expexting any calls or texts from anyone.
But I did.
My phone rang and I immediately pick it up. I read the caller ID and was surprised on who was calling. It was Sae.
I answered.
"Hello?"
"Atsuko, is this you?"
"Hai! How have you been doing, Sae? It’s been so long since the last time I heard from you!"
"Yeah, it has been quite long huh…"
I frowned. “What’s wrong? You don’t sound happy about it?"
There was a moment of silence in the other line.
Until she spoke up.
"Atsuko… Something happened to Minami…"
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Ah...the 6 degrees of separation is an OS
I thought it was a continued story... Too bad...
I would not mind to read the next chapter if it
Anyhow, I like how you made the story on Atsumina
From the first time they met until the present time with lots of twist in between
Ah... What's going on?
What happen to Minami?
Can't wait to find out
Thank you
:twothumbs :twothumbs :twothumbs
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Hey there! :welcome
This will be my first ever Kojiyuu fanfic. And I'm really excited about it!
The title looks interesting... so does the story ;)
Anyways, enjoy!
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Ice Cream
'Finally, some peace and quiet.'
Haruna sighed as she plopped onto one of the empty seats in the dressing room and opened her dark brown bag she brought for practice. She rummaged through the items in her bag, and when her eyes spotted the cover of her current favorite novel, she took it out and skimmed through the pages of the book to the page she last bookmarked. Once she found the page, she leaned back onto the seat for a comfortable position. When she thought she found a good position, she started reading the first paragraph of the page she’s reading.
It was really abnormal for having a break that lasts for an hour. It was usually only for twenty minutes. But today, their sensei told them to have a long break that lasts for an hour. When Takamina asked why, their senseni told her that everyone deserved a long break after an intense dance practice that went for hours. That, and the fact that he saw the members’ exhausted faces.
Everyone didn’t object and started to find some spots for them to rest. While everyone was make good use of their break by drinking a large amount of water and talking to other members, Haruna wanted to spend her break by peacfully reading her favorite novel.
Haruna tried to find a good and quiet place for her to read her book, but there were rarely any. Then she remembered that the dressing room was always empty. So that’s where she was now. And it was the best place to be alone at.
The air conditioner made a small noise as it cool the air around the dressing room. There was only silence and Haruna planned to keep it that way. She hummed a soft tune of her favorite English song. She never thought she would love Justin Timberlake’s voice and amazingly handsome looks. She fell in love with him after hearing his mainstream song on the radio.
Her eyes continued to read her book. The title of the book was seemingly interesting, though the content was far beyond what she had imagined. But, she didn’t regret buying this ‘erotic romance’ novel. It was certainly a good book, not that Haruna was some sort of perverted girl.
Speaking of a perverted girl, she wondered where Yuko was. The squirrel like girl was nowhere to be found. Usually she would be clinging onto Haruna during and after practice. But now, she wasn’t. Haruna felt a bit weird with no Yuko around.
'Where is she? Yuko should have been next to me once break started. I wonder where she is-'
"Nyan Nyan!"
'Speak of the devil.'
Haruna looked up from her book and saw the squirrel she had been thinking of coming into the dressing room and slamming the door behind her in the process. A toothy smile was plastered on her face as she went to Haruna, still in her training uniform and her curly brown hair in a ponytail. Haruna smiled and gave the ‘oshiri’ girl a small wave.
Yuko sat on an empty seat in front of Haruna, her toothy smile never left her face. The tall girl looked down, and saw what appeared to be a white plastic bag in the squirrel’s hand. This caught Haruna’s attention. She set the book down on her lap and sat up a little straight.
"Um, Yuko?" Haruna asked, her index finger pointing on the plastic bag. "Er, what’s in the bag?"
"Hm?" Yuko raised an eyebrow, confused on what the tall girl was saying. Until she looked down to her hands and finally realized what Haruna meant. "Oh, this! I bought us some ice cream for us to eat a while ago. Here!"
Yuko opened the plastic bag and took out a medium sized pink cup with a transparent plastic cover on top of it. Inside of it, was the ice cream. Pulling out a small spoon, she put the two items onto Haruna’s lap, just on top of her novel.
Even though she wanted to eat ice cream after practice and the fact that her throat was really dry, Haruna really wanted to continue her novel. As if the novel was more important in the current situation.
Haruna was unsure what to say. “Yuko… I don’t think I want to eat ice cream right now.”
The squirrel excited expression turned into a frown. “Why not?”
Haruna scratched the back of her neck nervously, still unsure of what to say next. She didn’t want to hurt her girlfriend’s feelings. They had been dating for a few months now, and Haruna knew what kind of things that might hurt Yuko’s little heart. So, she must be a bit careful to what she was about to say.
"Well, it’s just… I really want to continue reading my novel. It’s super interesting, I couldn’t go on a day without reading it," Haruna explained carefully. She placed the ice cream cup and spoon onto Yuko’s lap and ruffled her hair. "Maybe some other time, okay?"
Yuko’s frown never left her face and she looked at her girlfriend with sad, innocent eyes. “But… I bought two ice creams so that we could eat together. And it’s vanilla, your favorite!”
Haruna felt a twinge of guilt in her chest, but still continued to deny Yuko’s ice cream.
"Yuko, I really don’t want-"
"Pleaseeee, Nyan Nyan?" Yuko said softly with an innocent voice. Her eyes looked at Haruna pleadingly, her lips pouting and both of her hands folded together. Yuko knew Haruna’s weakness, one of them was her own pouting. Haruna thought it was so cute, she couldn’t say no to an inncoent face.
'Oh no, not her pouting. Why must she do it now?' Haruna thought, cursing in her mind. She tried so hard not give in most of the times, but she couldn't. She just couldn't. Yuko's pouting was, in her opinion, really adorable and cute. Saying no to her with that pouting was like hurting a small bunny. Squirrel in this case. No matter how hard Haruna tried, she couldn't say no.
Haruna finally gave in, and she let out a sigh of defeat. She took her ice cream cup and spoon from Yuko’s lap, opened the plastic lid and took a spoonful of vanilla ice cream. Seeing this action, Yuko smiled smugly. Mission accomplished, she thought.
"I’m doing this because you forced me to," Haruna grumbled loudly tha Yuko was able to hear. Yuko giggled and went up to her girlfriend so that she could give her a peck on the cheek.
"Oh come on, Nyan Nyan. Just tell me that you couldn’t handle my cute pouting," Yuko said smugly.
Haruna’s cheeks flustered from slight embarassment. It was true. She couldn’t really handle her girlfriend’s pouting. Though she tried to deny it, it was the ugly truth.
"Shut up! And eat your ice cream. I thought we were supposed to eat together," Haruna said annoyingly. Without any objections, Yuko quickly took off the plastic lid and start eating the vanilla flavoured ice cream.
Haruna sighed and took the spoonful of ice cream into her mouth. In an instant, her dried mouth was now cold and refreshed from creamy vanilla-flavoured liquid. Haruna’s eyes widened and moabed in satisfaction as she enjoyed her vanilla ice cream.
"Oh my God! This is so good!" Haruna exclaimed excitedly, and she quickly took another spoonful of ice cream which she then ate it. She made another satisfied sound and scoop some more ice cream into her mouth.
The action made Yuko giggle. It was only moments that Haruna denied her ice cream. Now, she was enjoying every single scoop she took. Yuko shook her head and continued eating her own cup in silence.
As the squirrel ate her ice cream, she didn’t notice that her girlfriend was staring at her. Haruna didn’t know she was staring. Until she noticed Yuko’s lips. In every scoop she take, it seemed to mezmerized Haruna. As if Yuko was seductively eating her ice cream. Her soft pink lips licking the spoon slowly yet in a somehow sexy matter. Haruna couldn’t help but gawk at it. She couldn’t stop herself from doing it.
Her dirty thoughts were stopped when she suddenly felt a cool wet sensation on her tailbone. She looked down from the gawking fest, and her eyes widened when she realized that there was a big scoop of ice cream that slipped from her spoon. She let out a yelp of surprise, which caught Yuko’s attention.
When the squirrel noticed the big chunk of ice cream, she couldn’t surpassed a giggle. She couldn’t believe Haruna would be that clumsy. Haruna pouted and tried to find some tissue in her bag, but was stopped when she saw Yuko standing up.
"Next time, Nyan Nyan, try not to be clumsy again," Yuko said seductively. She slowly walked to Haruna and propped herself on Haruna’s lap. Haruna looked at girlfriend nervously, the squirrel’s eyes flashed her with a hungry glare full of lust. By this time, Haruna’s brain wasn’t functioning and her heartbeat became rapid.
Yuko’s hands slithered its way to the tall girl’s neck. Somehow the temperature around the room suddenly became hot as Yuko’s face was close to Haruna. The tall girl couldn’t say anything, as she was awestruck on what her girlfriend’s about to do.
"Here, let me clean that up," Yuko whispered into Haruna’s ear in a soft, seductive voice. Haruna shuddered at her voice, the amount of arousal she was getting was beyond measurements.
Yuko’s head lowered from the tall girl’s ear to her collarbone, where the chunk of vanilla ice cream was resting on. Licking her lips, she lowered her head ever so slowly. And when her lips was close to the ice cream, she began to slowly lick the vanilla-flavoured crean around the areas of the collarbone. Haruna couldn’t help but moan in pleasure as the feeling of her girlfriend’s tongue and ice cream across her collarbone began to make her shiver. She didn’t want the feeling to stop, and it didn’t.
Yuko’s tongue continued to lick around the tall girl’s collarbone proffesionally, even though there weren’t any ice cream left to lick on. She wanted to give her girlfriend some pleasure before starting the next step. This was only the beginning.
Once she though she had enough of the collarbone, Yuko stopped and raised her head to look at her girlfriend. Beeds of sweat were trickling down her forehead and her face shows signs of pleasure. Yuko grinned seductively.
Using only one hand while the other was still tangled to the tall girl’s neck, it slowly went its way to the ice cream in Haruna’s hand. Her finger took a large scoop of ice cream and brought it back to her. Seeing the amount of ice cream in her hands, she slowly smeared the cold cream onto Haruna’s neck. The tall girl’s breathing hitched as she felt the cool cream came in contact with her neck. Yuko began to smear it around the sides and the front, her heartbeat at the same speed as Haruna’s.
Once she was done, she instantly began licking the smeared cream around Haruna’s neck. The tall girl gasped and moaned in intense pleasure as her girlfriend’s tongue worked its magic on her neck.
Loosening the grip of her ice cream, the cup fell to the floor. Tiny bits of ice cream were scattered.
"Y-Yuko…" Haruna could only moan the name of the girl who was doing a very good job on her work. She nearly screamed out loud when she felt Yuko biting the side of her neck softly.
"Shhh…" Yuko laid a finger on her Haruna’s lips. Their eyes met in an intense gaze. Both of them knew they wanted this. Both of them knew they the lust and hunger in one another’s eyes. They needed this. And there’s no turning back now.
"Let me do the pleasuring. Just relax and enjoy the ride," Yuko said in deep yet sexy voice. It intoxicated Haruna. And before she knew it, Yuko’s lips met hers.
Haruna could taste the vanilla-flavoured cream on her girlfriend’s mouth. She closed her eyes and pulled her girlfriend’s body closer to her, their lips never departing. The lust, the love, the hunger for one another was felt. They could only hope that no one will not interrupt them in their private time.
Yuko’s tongue begged for entrance, and the tall girl accepted it. Their tongues met and fought for dominance. Haruna could taste the ice cream even more as her saliva collide with Yuko’s. The tall girl moaned loudly as they continued their deep kissing.
Haruna’s hands lowered down and started slowly pulling Yuko’s shirt upwards.
Slowly…
Slowly…
Suddenly there was a camera flash.
"Yes! Finally caught you two red handed!"
The two lovers opened their eyes in shock as they heard a familiar voice coming from the door. They turned their heads towards the source of the voice.
There stood Watanabe Mayu, camera in her hand while the other hand was resting on her hip. She looked at them with a smirk, planning something evil in her mind. After months of trying to find some proof of their private times, she has finally caught them in the middle of it. She had planned a lot of things to tell this to every member in the group.
"Mayu, get over here and delete the photo!" Yuko said angrily, leaving Haruna’s lap and walked towards the cyborg girl. But that doesn’t scare Mayu one bit.
"Not if until you catch me first!" The cyborg exclaimed, and started running away from the dressing roon, her laughter echoing through the halls.
"What the- Mayu! Get back here right now!" Yuko shouted, and ran out of the room so that she could chase after the cyborg girl who has their picture that if revealed to all members, she and Haruna will be in so much trouble.
Haruna could only froze in her place as she tried to recall what had happened. She had been caught having one of her private times with Yuko. And now, Mayu has the picture for evidence or proof of their affair…
.
.
.
She let out a soft chuckle, thinking of what Yuko might after she catches Mayu.
She tidy her clothes and cleaned her ice cream fell to the floor. Once she was finished, she threw the tissues and ice cream cup to the nearby trash bin. Grabbing her book and put it in her bag, she walked out of the dressing with a small smile plastered on her face.
She couldn’t wait to see what Yuko might be doing to Mayu once she catches the cyborg girl.
Also not forgetting one thing.
'Me and Yuko should definitely eat ice cream more often.'
-
this is your first kojiyuu fanfic.... you're excited....
BUT WE'RE MORE EXCITED!! :drool: :w00t: :lol:
i dont know what to say but this fic is really GREATTTTT!!!!! :inlove: :inlove: :inlove: :twothumbs
you should write many kojiyuu fics you're a good writer!
and i love the title, the plot and the story!! :love: :love: :lol:
please write more!! :bow: :bow:
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I agree with Tam_atsu. We're very excited! :w00t:
I loved the way you built up the tension, only to have Mayu ruin the moment. :nervous
You really ought to write more KojiYuu OS. Actually, I enjoy WMatsui stories too. Hope to read more stories soon!
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what happen to minami :shocked
pls update the "ever enough" :cry:
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Hey guys! :deco:
I'm back with part two! :twothumbs
Don't worry, this won't be the last part. The ending will be in the next one so stay tuned!
So anyways, enjoy!
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Ever Enough (Part Two)
'Atsuko… Something happened to Minami.'
I felt time stopped as the words flew out of Sae’s mouth. My heartbeat turned rapid. I felt my legs began to weakened, and I slowly sunk down to the floor. Just by hearing her voice in a very worried tone made it conpletely obvious that something to Minami. My Minami. I was speechless, as I don’t know how to respond.
My grip on the phone tightened as I tried to spoke out a word.
But it only came out with a stutter.
"W-what happened…?" My voice was quiet and breathy but it was audible for Sae to hear.
"Minami, she…" I heard her voice stopped for a while and a sniff was heard. Had she been crying? "She passed out during practice last week. I don’t even know why. She was healthy and in good shape before. Our sensei quickly called the ambulance and they took her away to the hospital…"
As Sae began to explain what happened, her voice turned into echoes from every word she said. I felt my grip on the phone loosened, and eventually, the device left my hand and fell to the cold wodden floor.
I felt my eyes getting misty, as I felt the tears forming in my eyes. I tried hard to not let them fall, but I couldn’t. They left my eyes and trickled down my cheek. My visiob turned blurry and the sounds from the television faded away. A small ache revealed itself from my heart.
Minami… What happened to you?
Sae’s voice was calling out my name from my phone, but I didn’t bother pick it up. It eventually stopped and I knew that she hanged up.
I never been this shock in my entirel life.
My hands covered my face as I began to silently sob my heart out. It was too much. It was too much to handle. Minami was in the hospital for an unknown reason, but because of passing out. There were no reasons why she fell unconscious. I want to ask Sae again, but I knew she wouldn’t know. I bet everyone wouldn’t know. I need to know. This was Minami we’re talking about
I imagined her in a hospital bed, the color of her face drained out from her. Pale skin, steady breathing, eyes still closed. In a white hospital gown.
"Why…"
When I spoke, my voice was soft and weak. I sniffed.
"Why did I even leave her…?"
~~~
Sae texted me which hospital she was in and what room number she was staying after my small breakdown. Reading her text made me feel a bit better. She had told me what I need to know without me even asking her. I replied her with a thank you. I started getting ready to go to the hospital and nervousness started to build up from my chest. It had been a long time since I had last saw Minami. And I really didn’t know what I would expect from her. I didn’t know what kind of reaction she will pulled off when I visit her. Shock? Anger? I didn’t know.
After I finished changing my clothes, I checked the time on my wrist watch. 3 pm.
I went downstairs out of my room and calledbin a taxi to pick me up and take me to the hospital Minami was in. It shortly arrived five minutes later, and I walked out of my house. I locked it from the outside and quickly ran to the taxi which was waiting for me. The driver greeted me warmly once I came in and sat on the back. I told him the hospital where I must go to, and we were on the way.
Thankfully the trip from my house to my destination was in a short amount of time. I paid the taxi driver and thanked him, then quickly got out of the taxi. I turned around and gaze at the large building. It was 20 stories high with a large amount of windows. The name of the hospital was build on top of the building in large fonts. I took a deep breath and sigh. Here I come, Minami.
I walked in the lobby and the sterile atmosphere embraced me. All around doctors and nurses walked back and forth to elevators and operating rooms. They must be trying to help or at least save a life from possible illness and accidents. Patients who were young and old sat on their wheelchairs, acconpanied by a family member or a nurse. I saw an old man silently crying while holding a boquet of flowers. I frowned. His wife must have died.
I walked towards the reception desk and saw the receptionist. A young girl, in her mid twenties, wearing a white coat and a long black skirt. She looked up from the computer and flashed a warm smile towards me.
"Good afternoon, miss. How may I help you?" The receptionist said with a soft voice and a small bow.
I gave her a small smile and a nod. “I’m looking for my friend, Takahashi Minami. Could you tell me what room she’s in?” She nodded her head and sat down on her chair as she started typing something onto the computer. There was a small pause before the receptionist spoke up.
"Ah, here it is. Takahashi Minami, she is in room 10E on the tenth floor. Is there anything you want to ask?" The receptionist asked. I shook my head left and right.
"No. Thank you very much for your help," I thanked her with a small bow. She gave me a warm smile and showed me the way to the elevator. I thanked her once again, and made my way to the elevator. I presses the up button and the elevator door instantly opened. I walked in, pressed the button that showed the number 10, and closed the door.
Nervousness crept up in my chest as the elevator took me upwards to the tenth floor. I didn’t know how she was going to react when she saw me. I really didn’t know. But I have to be prepared.
The elevator bell rang as the door opened, revealing the tenth floor.
I went out of the elevator and quickly began to search for Minami’s room. Luckily it was close to the elevators.
I stopped in front of her room that was labeled ‘10E’ on the top of the door. I was really nervous. There’s no doubt about that. My right hand reached towards the door knob, but it stopped midway. I gulped, my nervousness increasing. This was now or never. My hand clutched on the door knob, and turned it.
The door made a small squeak as I slowly opened it. I quietly walked in the room and closed the door softly, making a soft click. I turned around.
I felt the tears of happiness forming in my eyes.
Minami… She was okay. Her figure was laying down on the white hospital bed, her eyes fixiated on a book she’s reading in her hands. Half of her body was covered by a white blanket, but it was clear she was wearing a hospital gown. Her curly brown hair was in a mess, but it made her even more cute. Her skin was almost as pale as snow. I guess she didn’t heard me came into the room, because she was still reading her book.
Tears were trickling down my face and it fell onto the sterile floor. Minami was there, safe and sound. As if she was healthy the whole time.
"Minami…"
My voice came out a loud whisper, and with that, she looked up from her book. Her calm expression turned into shock as she looked at me. Our eyes met in a powerful gaze, and we stayes silent. Her hand laid the book down on the blanket, her eyes never leaving mine for a second. She slowly raised up from her laying position and sat right up on the bed.
"A-Atsuko…"
Her voice. It was soft and weak. I missed her voice. So, so much. It brings back nosltagic times in the past. All of the good memories were coming back to me. The tears that I tried to hold back My legs began to move, and they started to run. I ran up towards her and enveloped her in the most tight embrace I could ever give to someone.
And then, I broke down.
My warm tears started spilling on her hospital gown. But I didn’t care. Minami was alright and in my arms, and that’s all it matters. My sobs began to grew louder, and it continued to echo around the room. I didn’t feel any contact from her until her arms slowly wrapped themselves onto my back and tightened the embrace. Her hand began to caress my long hair and though her voice was weak, she tried to calm me down.
"It’s okay, Atsuko. I’m okay."
I didn’t reply. I continued to sob loudly in the embrace. Her other hand began to rub my back as Minami tried to calm me down.
Minami… It has been so long…
~~~
"How’s your career, Acchan?"
We were drinking tea after our first meeting and embrace in over a year. When Minami was able to calm me down, she called the nurse to bring us some tea for us to drink. The nurse, looking like she was in her mid twenties, came back not too long with a warm smile. We thanked her and before she left the room, she told us if we need anything else, we can call her.
I even asked what was her name. Sakura, she replied in a soft voice. When I complimented her on how the name really suits her, she blushed deeply and bowed slightly before leaving the room.
We drank the tea in silence. It was awkward, to be honest. And I really wanted either one of us to spark up a conversation. After a good couple of minutes in complete silence, Minami finally asked me a question.
I took a sip of my tea, and put it gently on the small table next to Minami’s bed. “It’s been pretty good so far. A lot of people are asking me to sign up for movies and dramas. I even gained a lot of fans! It’s been a really good career for me!”
Seeing my bright attitude, Minami giggled and sighed. “That’s good to hear…”
Hearing her voice still weak, I felt a twinge of guilt in my chest. I couldn’t help but feel guilty for leaving her alone in AKB. I was her only closest and best friend among others. And I knew that things were different without me being the ace of the group.
"Um, how about you, Minami? How’s AKB doing with you being the leader?" I asked her before taking a sip of my tea.
She took a deep breath and sighed. “It’s been really good. Training’s more intense, lots of events to participate with, lots of fans. It’s… been going great for AKB.”
Noticing her sad expression, I asked again. “You don’t seemed happy about it.”
There was a long pause from Minami until she spoke.
"Acchan… do I fit the roll of being the leader of the group?"
I was really taken aback from the sudden question. She never asked or even doubt her own position before. So I knew there was something bothering her.
I scooted closer to her bed and took her hand. It was cold, there was no sign of warmth. This made me even feel worried about her condition. Was she really that sick?
"Of course, Minami. With your bright personality and good teamwork, AKB will get through whatever obstacles alobg the way!" I said reasurringly, giving her hand a squeeze. She looked at her hand and back at me, giving me a sad smile. She squeezed my hand slightly and sighed.
"Thanks, Acchan. It’s just…" She bit her lip as if hesitant to continue, but she still did. "I had been thinking of graduating from AKB. You know, I feel as if no one doesn’t really see me as a leader. I feel as if they only see me as another member. And I’m beginning to doubt my own position too…"
She stopped when she felt the tears forming in her eyes. I frowned slightly. Seeing her like this made my heart ache. She was my best friend and the only person that I had been close to, and hearing hef saying that she wanted to graduate made me somehow angry. Her being a leader fits really well, how could she even say that to herself?
I gave her hand a tight squeeze and wiped away her tears with my other hand.
"Minami, don’t say that to yourself. You are a great leader, and don’t ever doubt that. And if other members think like that, don’t listen to them. They might be jealous of you being the leader and couldn’t see the true leader within you. Everyone has a purpose, and if your purpose is leading AKB, then stick to that purpose and try your every best to accomplish it."
Minami was really shocked and speechless. She couldn’t believe I would ever say that to her. What I said about her was all true. She shouldn’t think like that. It would only weakened her fate of being a true leader.
"Minami… Thank you. I really don’t know what to say…" I remembered that line years ago on our first day meeting each other. Such good memories.
I smiled and chuckled. “You’re welcome. It’s the least I could do for my midget.”
She pouted when I called her a midget, and yank her hand off of mine and crossed her arms around her chest. “Mou, Acchan! I thought you would never call me that again!”
She was really cute when she’s pouting. I couldn’t help but giggle and ruffle her hair a bit.
"Of course I won’t. You are my midget, after all."
I laughed out loud when Minami’s cheeks flustered in embarassment.
We continued to talk about other things; family, friends, secret celebrity crushes. It felt like the old days. Where Minami and I just talk about random things for hours. It really takes me back. So much nostalgia was happening in my head.
But time has its limits and eventually, it was time for me to go home.
Sakura, the nurse from before, knocked and came in the room right in the middle of a conversation about Yuko and Kojiharu’s secret relationship.
"Um, I’m really sorry to interrupt but it’s time for Maeda-san to go home."
I frowned and turned my head towards Minami. She had a sad expression on her face. She doesn’t want me to go home either.
Before I could get up, Sakura’s voice interrupted.
"But… I might tell the doctor that Maeda-san is a family member. That way, you could stay with Takamina-san."
I smiled widely and bowed slightly to the kind nurse. I never knew she would be that generous.
"Thank you so much, Sakura-chan. I owe you big time!"
The nurse blushed. “Y-you’re welcome, Maeda-san.”
"Please, call me Atsuko or even Acchan. Calling me Maeda-san makes me feel old."
She nodded her head and smiked shyly. “Very well… Acchan.”
~~~
"Ah, Mrs. Takahashi and Mrs. Maeda. Please, have a seat."
Minami’s doctor called us both about something important. It has been almost two weeks since my visit. I had been staying in the hospital for quite some time. Even though I always had a busy schedule, I still managed to try to stay with Minami. When I visit, we would engage in a long conversation while watching some television. Minami got to see my appearances in dramas and movies, even in talk shows and the news. Every time I appeared or my name was spoken, Minami woukd go on and on about how I was growing more popular. So far, it has been a good two weeks.
Though to be honest, I was nervous on what the doctor’s going to say.
Minami and I sat next to each other, sitting in two large comfortable chairs. I was really nervous. Hopefully the doctor won’t give us any bad news.
"So how have you been doing, Minami? Has your condition gone well in the past week?" The doctor said, pulling out a pen and a sheet, readying himself to write down on the sheet. I looked at his features. In his late fifties, grey hair, dark brown eyes. He looked a bit old to be a doctor, in my opinion. But I knew he was a professional.
"Well… I still have cold sweat every night. And whenever I try to move, my bone starts to ache. I often started bleeding from my nose every now and then, and sometimes woulf get real painful headaches," Minami explained all the various symptoms she was having. Wait… symptoms?
The doctor nodded and wrote something in the sheet of paper below him. He put the pen down after he was finished, and began to search through the pile of binders and folders next to him. It took a moment to find the folder he was looking for. It was labeled ‘Symptoms of Severe Illness’. I gulped. My nervousness was taking its toll on me.
He opened the folder and began flipping the pages. It took a while before he stopped at one page in the middle. He began looking back the previous sheet and back to the folder. He began to read the so-called ‘symptoms’ under his breath as he continued looking back and forth to the sheet and folder
His expression turned to worry, and he sat back onto his chair. He sighed. “I knew it…” He muttered silently, but was audible for me to hear it.
"Knew what, doctor?" I asked.
He sat straight up on his seat, and took of his glasses. He took a deep breath and spoke.
"Minami… do you have any family members who died of any type of severe illness?"
Now this was getting really suspicious. First he asked about her condition, now he asked about her family? Who died of any severe illness? I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. I had a bad feeling about this.
I turned to Minami, who had this worried expresion the same as the doctor.
"Well, my grandfather died because of cancer. And my uncle also died of the same cancer. But I never knew what kind of cancer they suffered from," Minami explained.
The doctor nodded and messaged his forehead. He let out a deep sigh.
"Doctor, what’s going on?" I asked in a very worried tone. My hand searched from Minami’s, and when I finally did, I took it. I squeezed it tightly, Minami doing the same.
He looked at both of us and put on his glasses. He sighed once again.
"Minami, I believe…"
The doctor was speechless himself. And I was preparing for the worse.
"I believe… I believe, you have leukemia…"
-
ehhhh!minami is sick....
And its leukemia :panic:
This is getting more and more interesting!
Omg i cant wait to read the next part
I hope minami will not die *finger cross*
I want my atsumina to be happy *sigh
Please update soon :on gay:
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W-What?! My Minami have a Leukemia?!
-The hell that was a cancer!!! Omg!! *panic*
-Maaan...Pass down from her grandpa and uncle eh?
-Yeah, maybe...How will this go on...Part 3 is the last one right??
-I'm worried what kind of ending will await us...
-...Await us when we're awaiting or expecting for a better ending...
>Anyway, hope you update the next part...Will be waiting for the next new OS if there is!!~
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What.... No.... Minami had leukaemia
What's happening to Atsumina next?
Poor Atsuko and Minami....
Can't wait to see what happen next
Thank you for the update...
:twothumbs :twothumbs :twothumbs
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"Ah, Mrs. Takahashi and Mrs. Maeda"
Is this a mistake :nervous?
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"Ah, Mrs. Takahashi and Mrs. Maeda"
Is this a mistake :nervous?
Haha I guess so :nervous
I was going to type Maeda and Takahashi-san, but i thought it was wrong :P
I'm sorry for the mistake!
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Takaminaaaaa... :bleed eyes:
What will happen next??
Update soon please... :bow:
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Hey hey hey! I'm back! :yossi: :cow:
I wanted to post this WMatsui OS I just posted in Tumblr a few minutes ago since a lot of people like it. So I want to hear your opinions as well! :)
I hope you guys like this! This song is inspired by the song Feel Again by OneRepublic. :deco:
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Feel Again (WMatsui)
"Rena-chan, can you help me with this one?"
My ears perked up from the voice of the younger girl beside me. My hand stopped writing on my notebook and I looked up to see what she wanted me to help with now. Her pink pen was pointing at a question which shows a geometry equation.
I smiled. It was quite easy for me to answer it, but for Jurina it wasn’t a piece of cake.
I took the paper from her and showed her the steps. “It’s really easy. All you have to do is just do these steps.” I write down the process of finding the correct answer as I felt Jurina’s eyes looking down at me with a serious and focused expression.
When I finally finished, I turned to at Jurina. “Do you understand now?”
She looked at my steps for a few seconds and muttering it under her breath. Her mouth formed an ‘o’ shape until she finally understood on what I was trying to show her.
"Oh! I get it now! Thank you Rena-chan!" She exclaimed, giving me a bright smile that showed her dimples. I never said this to her in person, but my heart often fluttered when I saw her dimples. I don’t know why, it just does. Her appearance matched the ones of an adult, but her personality was as similar to a middle school girl despite the fact that she was in her second year of high school.
I giggled at her active personality, and smiled as my hand reached towards her head so that I could soft pat it as if she was a young child. Her eyes were now focused now on her homework, her hand writing down the answers while still wearing her cat-like smile.
I was very grateful to have her in my life.
I had never been this close to anyone before besides my parents. To be honest, I never get to have any friends during my whole life. I was always very close to my family because I had a strong bond with my whole family members. My mom, dad, cousins, grandparents. I had always been very close to them since I was young and because of that, I never get to socialize with other people.
No one even seemed to notice me in school, even though I had been there for a few years and a lot of teachers noticed me because of my good grades and princess-like attitude.
I had tried everything to make some friends. I tried being nice to the students, but they still ignored me. I tried to join some clubs just to interact with some students, but it didn’t either. Somehow my shyness and nervousness stopped me from getting friends. And it’s very irritating.
Besides the shy and introverted behavior, most of the school knows about my incident. I don’t really remember what happened, though. I was taking some notes from my locker when a group of boys came and made fun of me. I was really annoyed at them but I kept silent. After that, nothing. The last thing I knew was seeing the leader on the ground, his nose all bloody and his right eye bruised. That was the last thing I remembered before I black out.
After the incident, the students might sometimes call me Gekikara, saying that I acted like a psychopath whenever I go into that mode. I don’t know if it was true or not. I tried to ignore it, though the teasing continued for the rest of my first year of high school.
Until… Jurina came.
I don’t know how to describe her when I saw her for the first time. Short hair, dark orbs that shimmered with excitement, her smile and dimples. It was the only thing I could describe her. I still remembered her introduction once the teacher told her to introduce herself,
"Hi! I’m Matsui Jurina, and I hope I could to be friends with all of you. Yoroshiku onegaishimasu!"
I never seen anyone so cheery in my whole life as a teenager.
Of course, I thought that she was one of the popular type and thought to myself there was no way I could ever be friends with her. So, I didn’t do anything.
But when the bell rang signaling the start of lunch, as I was packing my books from my desk into my bag, I felt someone tapping on my shoulder. I turned around and noticed it was Jurina.
"Hi! I’m sorry I didn’t recognized you in class. What’s your name?" Jurina said in a cheery and childish voice.
Being the shy girl I was, I replied back with a stutter. “Um… M-Matsui Rena… I-It’s nice to m-meet you…” I sounded really ridiculous, to be honest.
"Ah, you’re one of those shy ones, huh? It’s okay, I like cute and shy girls!" Jurina exclaimed, flashing me her smile which also showed her dimples. I felt my cheeks burning up, and my gaze turned to look down on my feet. I was really embarassed and didn’t expexted her to say something like that even though we just met.
"Whoa, Rena-chan you’re face is all red. Are you feeling sick?" Jurina gasped, looking a bit worried and she laid her hand on my forehead to check my temperature. The action only made me blush even more. "You’re not burning up, but your face is still red. Do you want me to take you to the clinic?"
I immediately shook my head vigirously. “No, I’m not sick… It’s just…”
"It’s just what, Rena-chan?" Jurina raised an eyebrow.
"It’s just… I never heard anyone calling me cute before…" I said in a low and soft voice. Jurina seemed to be surprised from what I just said.
"Eh? Really?" Jurina asked, surprised. "Well, I think everyone is blind. I think Rena-chan is the cutest girl I’ve ever seen!"
That only made me blush even harder than usual.
"T-thank you…"
"Hey, do you want to have lunch with me?" Jurina asked me with pleading eyes.
"Um… I’m not sure…"
"Please, Rena-chan?" She took my hand. I felt an electrical current shot up through my arm once our hands touched. My heart skipped a beat. I was still blushing. I don’t know what was this girl doing to me. But… It felt good.
I couldn’t resist her puppy eyes. I sighed and gave her a weak smile. I nodded my head. “Okay…”
Jurina smiled and giggled. She turned and ran out of the classroom, pulling me with her. “Alright, let’s go!”
And for the very first time in my whole life… I finally made a friend.
~~~
"Ne Rena-chan, thank you for helping me finish my math homework. I don’t know if I could finish it without your help."
We were walking along the street where my house was. It was nearing night time, the sun was settling down into the horizon, creating a maginificent sunset. It was a beautiful sight to see but my eyes kept glancing at Jurina the whole time.
I don’t know what made her so special and what made me want to treasure her.
Maybe she was the reason I could feel what it’s like to have a friend. The reason that I left the darkness and into the light. The reason to know what love was. The reason why I could finally open up to other people.
She did everything that helped me feel. To know what it’s like to feel to have someone as close as her.
That was why I am grateful to have her in my life. Because she helped me get up from the ground and show me things I never knew existed.
I really do treasure her.
I looked at her and gave her my sweetest smile. Giggling, I softly patted her head.
"You’re very welcome. It’s the least I could do for my Jurina," I said unconsciously. Once I realized what I just said, I bowed my head down and blushed violently. Oh no, why did I just said? I didn’t know what I was thinking.
I heard Jurina replying in a stuttering voice.
"T-thank you, Rena-chan."
I was too busy blushing that I didn’t notice we reaches my house. It wasn’t that big but not too small either. A simple, two story house that has a minimalistic look to it. In front of the house was a small garden, which my mom made a few years ago. She loved all kinds of flowers and everyday, she would plant different types in each area. It was safe to say to call this place ‘home’.
"Well here we are," I said, turning to Jurina. "I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then, Jurina." I said, giving her a smile before turning my body to walk towards the small gate. Before I could even touched the gate, I felt her hand on my arm.
"Wait, Rena-chan."
I turned around and face Jurina. “Yes? What is it Jurina?”
She bit her lip nervously and looked down at her feet. Both of her feet shuffled a bit, feeling uncomfortable.
"Ano… I have something to tell you…"
"Oh. Okay, what is it then?" I asked, slightly curious.
I was expecting something simple or maybe just a reminder of something I don’t know of. But Jurina was really nervous about this. I seriously don’t know so I waited patiently for her to say what she was going to say.
Until…
"I love you…"
"Eh?" I really wasn’t expecting that.
"I… love you, Rena-chan. I really do. Ever since the first day, I felt this sort of attraction towards you. It took me a week or so to figure out that I love you. I never felt this to anyone before, and since you are my first, I thought it would be best if I tell you after we get to know each other even better."
I was really shocked. I didn’t expect the hyperactive, kissing monster Jurina to be this nervous and shy. Her confession was so sudden and it took me back in surprise. I never knew she took fancy towards me.
But then, it hit me.
The reason why I want to treasure her, the reason why I want her to be closer to me than anyone else, the reason why I get jealous whenever she flirts with other boys or girls. I love her. As more than a sister and friend.
She was the first love I tried to reach out after so many failed attempts. She was my first friend. She was first at everything. She helped me.
And now here she was, confessing her love towards me face to face. I never felt so happy in my whole life.
My lips tilted to form a warm smile. I walked up in front of her, which made her raise her head. I felt her body froze as I leaned in closer to her and gave her a peck on the lips.
I looked at her reaction. I couldn’t really describe it. Eyes widened, lips apart. It was so hard for me to hold back my laughter.
I giggled. “Mou Jurina, you’re so cute when you’re surprised.”
Jurina snapped out of her thoughts. “So does this mean…”
"Yes. We are a couple now," I said, showing her my sweet smile. I was so happy on the inside. I resist the temptation to just pull her closer to me and capture her soft lips into a passionate kiss that might last for a long time. I want to do that, but we were outside and neighbors or people walking across the street might see us. So I resist the temptation.
Before I knew it, I was pulled into the most tight embrace I had ever felt.
I heard Jurina squealing in happiness after I returned the feelings and offcially announced us a couple. I sighed and smiled to myself, returning the hug. I promised to treasure Jurina until the day I will take my last breath on Earth.
"Thank you so much, Rena-chan~" I heard Jurina squealed in my chest, still in our embrace.
I chuckled slightly, her body so close to mine made my heart feel warm. I planted a kiss on her head and tightened the hug.
"You’re welcome… my sweet Jurina," I happily said, finally feeling a strange sense of peace with her close to me. Oh how I wanted this to never end.
Thank you so much, Jurina.
Because of you, I can feel again.
-
I love happy endings. Especially with these two. :grin:
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Waw....... It's really nice fanfic........
But,,a Little fast......
But,, :thumbup :thumbup
Good.... :twothumbs
WMATSUI Forever
(https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-QM1-k8La0eg/UhbPaiyDrGI/AAAAAAAAAoo/LF8ydmhGl8g/w346-h192/vlcsnap-2013-08-22-22h24m47s113.png)
My Fancfiction.....
http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=36106.0 (ftp://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=36106.0)
Please read and Please Give me your comment..... :wub: :nervous
:bingo:
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im gonna die for diabetes... thanx
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I'm glad someone else loves Jurina's dimples too. :yep:
So far, I'm really enjoying reading your short stories, and hope you post more soon! :thumbup
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Mod edit: "Intoxicated (WMatsui)" has been deleted. JPH!P does not allow any sexual themed fanfics of Matsui Jurina as she is still underage.
Law #9 Any Perv talk/images/video/etc. of underage members are not allowed.
Strictly NO sexual themed images, videos or talk about persons below 18 years of age.
JPH!P will comply with any government requests for information involving investigations of the exploitation of children.
- seigus
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Eh...Wmatsui... slept together due to drunk...
What would They do next?
Would they fine with this fact?
can't wait to see what's going to happen next
Thank you
:twothumbs :twothumbs :twothumbs
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Heh I already read all this story it is really nice.
Please continue writing.
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the face of Rena O.O (OMG)
hahahahahahahaha i want to see her....
thanks
and continue this ASAP....
Please ^_^!!
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the end or continue?
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Geez! Do you know that I was grinning the whole time I was reading this? Don't think of me as a pervert but the scene's just like in a movie. I enjoy these kinds of "drunk sex" thing. I dig this lol. Update soon favorite author~
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Konbanwa~! :welcome
I recently posted this fanfic on Tumblr, and it got lots of good feedback. So I might as well post it here too!
It was a bit hard writing the fanfic, but I hope it might pleasure all of the WMatsui shippers out there! :)
I hope you guys enjoy! This fanfic was inspired by the song Glowing by The Script. :D
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Glowing (WMatsui)
(http://media.tumblr.com/d26b8901f3d97c7847b546074a6cfee1/tumblr_inline_mspbdws7071qz4rgp.jpg)
Love. It was a complicated feeling if you asked me.
Unfortunately, this isn’t really one of the cliche love stories. It was somewhat different in my perspective.
Gosh, I don’t know where to start. Well, I guess I will start from the beginning.
A couple of months ago, Rena started to date a guy. I don’t want to pronounce his name. But at first, I was a little bit cautious. I knew Rena well enough that this was her first time in a relationship before. I had the right to be cautious. She never experienced love before, so she was still clueless on the whole relationship thing.
She introduced me to her boyfriend a couple of months ago. It was a coincidence, their meeting I meant. They came across each other during an anime convention back in Tokyo, and it was also a coincidence that they both liked the same anime. Just hearing it sounded a bit cliche, huh?
Unfortunately the anime booth they were in was selling the last copy of the new season of her favorite anime. Rena insisted that the boy bought it, but the boy told her the same thing. In the end, Rena bought the last remaining DVD and treated the boy into having late lunch with her in a ramen restaurant across the street. They started to get along well and eventually, they gave each other’s numbers before departing.
After a few days of getting to know each other better, the boy had finally asked her out with all of his courage. And Rena gladly accepted.
To tell you the truth, the boy was actually nice. He was easy to get along with and never felt awkward when trying to make up conversations. He was fairly handsome and has deep brown orbs. No wonder Rena would fall for him. He looked strangely ikemen.
They do make a good couple. Shy at times, cute at other times.
But still, I can’t help to feel a little jealous.
I don’t mind if they were together, I just hated it when they put it all up in my face. They don’t need to show that they were a couple too much to the public, because to me it was really annoying. But, maybe I was just overacting. They seemed to do it normally like any other couples do. Then again, I don’t want to feel like I’m the third wheel. It was just… irritating.
Weeks has passed, and everything went smoothly, I supposed. Though, Rena and I rarely got to have any quality time together. Just like we used to, all before she was in a relationship. The times were spent every minute with each other, just talking about random things and go out on ‘dates’. Something simple like watching movies, having lunch or dinner, shopping for a little bit. It was what we always did before she met the boy. But I don’t blame people who were in love, they’re just caught in their own little world.
So, I started to distanced myself. From both of them. If I kept being close to them, they might feel uncomfortable and can’t get enough of their times together. I wanted to be happy, so being the kind person I am, I distanced myself from them and tried to find ways to have some fun with myself.
It didn’t really worked out that good.
Which was why I was stuck in my house, in a middle of a heavy thunderstorm with two empty bentos on the square wooden table in front of me as I lazily watched Rena’s favorite anime on the television. By this point, I was bored to death.
I missed Rena. I really did. I just did, and I want us to be like we used to be.
I realized this and I had been sulking for days just to get anything from Rena. A call, a text, anything in that matter. But I never got any of them. I missed her that much, I also realized I was watching her favorite anime. I didn’t pay attention to it much, my thoughts and feelings were all about Rena. I sighed, resting my chin on my palm, staring endlessly to the television.
My eyes drew back to the phone on the table. Looking at it eagerly, wanting to text or call the girl I called a best friend for six years and asked how she was doing. It was a tough task, to be honest. Normally, I would do it almost everyday. But now, I barely even to get to say ‘hi’ to her.
I groaned in utter frustration and rubbed my forehead. My migraines continued to get worse with days counting. Just thinking about things like Rena aren’t making any good recovery. I took my pills regularly after I ate, but it just won’t fade.
I wished the storm would pass by sooner or later.
'Knock, knock, knock.'
I jumped out of the sofa in reflex once I heard a loud knock from my front door, waking me up from my deep thoughts. A loud clash of thunder followed, telling me that it was still raining heavily outside. I don’t know if I was hearing things or it was just the rain petting down towards the front door. Who could be knocking outside in a middle of a storm?
Just when I was about to sit down on the couch once again, another loud knock occur. I wasn’t imagining it. I walked quickly towards the front door, not wanting whoever’s out there getting soaked from the rain.
I didn’t have a peephole which was a big inconvenience, since I won’t knew who it was knocking. But I didn’t took it as a big deal, and the second my hand was firmly grasped against the door knob, I opened the door.
My eyes widened. I didn’t know what the hell she was thinking that night.
"Rena?"
Standing in front of the door with the hard wind and rain falling down over her body was her. In a long sleeved shirt with long yet wet dark blue jeans, her hair in a mess and also soaked. Her arms crossed over her chest from the shear cold with nothing to protect her from the rain. She looked at me with her eyes, deep in sadness and hurt. Her pale lips trembling, begging for some warmth.
What on earth was she doing?
I stopped staring at her in utter shock and shook my thoughts off. There was no time. She needed to get inside.
"Come on, what are you standing there? Get inside, you’re soaking wet!" I grabbed her arm and pulled her in. She felt a bit lighter than before, which was very strange. She didn’t resist, but I knew that she was dragging on her feet. Like as if she was weak. This made feel a lot more worried about her.
We made it to the living room, and I slowly laid her down on the soft couch, my hand still gripping onto her arm. Her skin was cold, and I could feel the sofa I was sitting getting soaked from her. I knew had to change the sofa. But right now, my number one priority was Rena.
Her eyes were downcast, and I started to look at her face. A fresh scar was planted onto her left cheek. I looked at it in confusion. What.. who could had caused this? I felt the anger boiling inside me. I don’t know who in their right minds would hurt Rena. Why would they…?
I let go of her arm and stood up from my seat. “Stay here, Rena. Let me get some fresh clothes for you, okay?”
Right before I was about to turn around and walked towards my room, I felt a hand grabbing my wrist and grasped it tightly. I stopped dead in my tracks when I heard her voice.
"Don’t go…"
It was soft and weak. It was in a begging tone, filled with hurt and loneliness. Like the feeling I had been having these days without her presence. It hurts to see her like this. This wasn’t the Rena I spent my life with, she wasn’t meant to be hurt like this. She was to be happy and free.
She never let go of my wrist, and I turned around to face her. I sighed and gave her a small smile.
"Okay."
I sat back down, and instantly she pulled me into an embrace. It was so tight, but I didn’t pulled away.
Then. I heard her crying.
Hearing her cries are the worst. Seeing her like this made my heart ache. I don’t know why, it’s just that I felt a strong connection between each other. Like a strong rope was tightening us together. As if I could feel what she was feeling. Whether it was sad, happiness or anger. Every kind of emotion she felt has a strong effect towards me.
So I let her. I let her cry onto my shoulder, her warm tears soaking my shirt. I didn’t mind it. Slowly, my arms reached her and I embraced her back. She tightened her grip around my body without a single word. I didn’t try to say or do anything other than gently rubbing her back. I lean closer towards her head and I quietly sniffed her raven hair. Blueberry. She still smell great even from the rain.
Her cries echoed throughout the room as we continued to stay in the same position. Never giving each other words to say than our body language. It felt right. Us being like this. I had comforted her many times, but this felt different.
She finally took some time to tell me what was wrong. She sniffed and let out a shaky breath.
"He hurt me…"
I knew who ‘he’ was. I didn’t need an explanation for it.
"He said he wouldn’t, but… He did. He kept forcing me to… to…"
Tears started to form in her eyes, and I squeezed her hand tightly.
"You don’t need to say it. I understand."
"Why must this happen… I don’t understand why…"
I wrapped my arms around her and planted my lips on her head. Her sweet scent still glued onto my nose.
"Love is complicated, Rena. It can make you happy, but it also can make you turn into a wreck."
~~~
We ran away.
We ran away and we didn’t regret our decisions. Our lives turned into a drastic turn, and we thought it’s best if we start anew. Start everything from the very start. Starting a new life together, with no problems and no one else to interrupt. The thought sounded insane, but for both of us it was not. We thought it was a brilliant idea.
We packed our stuffs in a cardboard box that night, and left without saying a word to anyone. Not our families, our close friends. No one. We just left around the middle of the night.
I remembered how she slept on the passenger seat. She looked so peaceful. As if she was the innocent and carefree Rena I loved the most. I was sleepy myself, but I didn’t want to rest. I just to drive, drive out of the city and into another place. Maybe Tokyo, maybe Hokkaido. I didn’t know. I just wanted us to leave. Leave everything behind and start anew.
After long hours of driving, we finally settled in a hotel in Sapporo. It was quite big and the price wasn’t that expensive so, we decided to stay there for a night or two before finding our own place to stay.
All those longs hours of late night, wait morning, driving was tiring me. What’s worst is that it gave me painful migraines. I groaned in pain as I felt another one. I didn’t remember where I put my medicines at. I didn’t really pay attention to it, I just throw my belongings into a cardboard box.
"Here, Jurina."
I looked up and saw her. She was looking at me with her warm smile that can literally brighten up my day, and in her hands was the pills and a glass of water. Good thing she was by my side the whole time. I didn’t know what I’d do without her. I smiled a little and took one pill and the glass of water from her hands, saying thank you in the process.
After I finished taking my medicine, I gave back the empty glass to Rena.
"Thank you, Rena."
She smiled warmly and giggled. I loved how she smile and giggle in her own cute way.
"Don’t mention it, Jurina. But.. I should be thanking you. For making this choice."
I smiled, and pulled her close to mine until our nose touched. The distance between our lips were close enough, and I hold back the urge to feel the,.
"It’s the least I can do. I won’t let a bad man take you away. I won’t let anyone hurt you and take you away."
I kissed her nose and I saw her blushing madly. I chuckled. She was indeed cute. This was the Rena I loved most.
"Ano, you should get some sleep, Jurina. You have been driving for hours, and you need your rest."
"But I want to protect my Rena-chan." I pouted.
"Well, protect me later. Right now, you need some sleep." She tucked me into the soft warm bed and drew the covers over me. She planted her lips onto my forehead and ruffled my hair lightly.
"Sleep tight, Jurina-chan." She whispered softly to me.
"I will." I smiled. She was about to leave but before I could even say a word, she already beat me to it.
"Don’t worry. I’ll sleep beside you." I felt her crawling into the bed and feeling her body so close to mine. I held her close to me, not wanting to let go.
"I love you." I finally admitted.
She giggled softly and gave me a peck on the nose.
"I love you too. Now sleep," She said.
"Hai hai, Rena-chan~" And I did. And I continued to held her tightly in my sleep.
I completely forgot about the past and focus on the future. I will live a new life with Rena, a new and happy one. We will be by each other’s side no matter what. I will always protect her and love her as well.
As long as she will always be beside me, I felt like I’m glowing.
And I will always be.
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please epilogue for FF glowing hehe ...
and how about " Intoxicated" ??
one shot or continue?
thanks for update
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Wmatsui so cute~ <3333
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I want the conti of this >.<"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Ooooh I really like this one.
This is so perfect.
Thank you :bow: :bow: :bow: :bow:
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More!!!!! :bow:
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continue the other FF
and thanks
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Konbanwa~! :)
I’m back with another oneshot. I wanted to make something quick yet still edible for readers. Since I got stuck listening to a current song that I kept playing on repeat, I figured I might as well make a fanfic about it. :twothumbs
I might make another part for Mayuki and maybe a bit of Kojiyuu, but that’s still a plan. I have exams (god, why?) on the 16th until the 24th, so I will be absent during that week. Gomen ne~! :sweatdrop:
Anyways, enjoy! And don't forget to follow my Twitter!
http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
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Breakeven (WMatsui)
Everybody deserves true love. It doesn’t need to be as long as the word ‘forever’, but I believe that everybody deserves true love even for once in their life.
Well, except me. I don’t deserve any of it.
I’m one of those people who couldn’t differentiate the times where I could be going out and socialize with other people and the times where I have to focus on my life goals. It doesn’t bother me at times, but it does ruin everything I try to reach out besides my goals.
It only ruin one thing, though. Love.
I didn’t know how it started. My love for a certain girl who was six years younger than me. Yes, I know people might think of it as weird. Loving someone who’s age different was far than mine, was indeed weird in people’s eyes. But, I don’t know. There was something about her that sparked something in my heart, and it lid up like a firework exploding in the night sky.
I couldn’t really keep my thoughts in control, because they were all about her. Everyday, in school, with friends, my thoughts were all about her. And as if I felt like my head was about to explode, in the most metaphorical way as possible.
I knew I couldn’t keep it any longer. So one cold night in a park which was our favorite place other than the cafe near my campus, fingers folded tightly together trying to hold the freezing temperature that was barely hard to handle, I confessed my thoughts and feelings towards her.
It was cliche and long, plus the moments where I stuttered and had no other words to say. But in the end, I remembered saying with a nervous voice,
"I love you, Jurina…"
I didn’t really remembered after that. But I do remembered being pulled into a tight hug, that felt welcoming and warm. Warm enough to put a strange feeling of warmth in my body and also my heart. And also, her response. It was as soft as a whisper but was still audible.
"I love you too."
Afterwards, I asked her if she could stay with me for the night. She replied with a smile and told me that she could, though she needed to tell her parents about it first. Once she got her acceptance, she finally stayed at my apartment for just one night. We ate leftover bentos from my fridge while watching late night talk shows that I found quite entertaining. When she felt sleepy, I gave her some of my clothes for her to change. To be honest, I love how it was too big for her body. She was wearing a red baseball t-shirt with white shorts.
We cuddle close in the bed. We didn’t do anything physical or sexual, because I wasn’t planning to. My love for her is real, and it isn’t for lust or desire.
Our relationship grew for months. And I loved each and every minute of it.
I just felt like I wanted her for myself, even though I knew that sounded a bit selfish. I wanted to see her smile because of me, laugh because of me, happy because of me. It was selfish, I know. But I don’t care. All I need was her happiness that showed how much I loved her and how much she loved me.
In every relationships, there will always be ups and downs. But somehow, we managed to get through all of those. As long as our love was strong, we will never break apart.
But… somehow…
My feelings for her faded little by little.
I started to have lots of pressure in my life. My college was giving me too much work to be done, having a part time job so that I could afford to pay my apartment fees, buying medicines for my sick mother. It was causing a downward spiral, and eventually I was absolutely stressed. There was so much things to handle and I thought I couldn’t take all of this anymore.
Jurina kept asking me to take it easy and take a moment to rest, try to freshen up my body. But no matter how many times I kept saying ‘yes’ to her, I couldn’t feel relaxed.
This also meant that the more things I have to handle, the less time I get to spend it with her.
Whenever Jurina made a full plan for us to spend some quality time together, I always said I couldn’t and kept saying the same reason; “I can’t. I’m really busy right now.” I always kept apologizing to her, but she only gave me a somewhat sad smile and told me that it was okay. Even though it wasn’t. I always said I would make it up to her next time, but of course it didn’t happened.
This has been going for a couple of weeks, and turned to a month. It was the same thing everyday. And I felt guilty that I couldn’t make Jurina happy like I used to.
Every time she would try to show her loving affection towards, I would always move away from her or just reject her. I always saw her crest fallen expression, and I knew she was brokenhearted. But, she still loved me. Even for my cold actions. I didn’t know what to do. I was so stressed.
I knew everything must come to an end. On a cold Friday night, she confronted me and we both sat on the couch.
I remembered the scene like it was just yesterday.
"I don’t think this will work out, Rena."
"W-What?"
It’s just… It’s just that you are always too busy with other things and you totally forgot about me. Your girlfriend. You rarely spend your time with me, and it’s getting really irritating.”
"Jurina, how many times do I have to repeat myself? I have so much things and I’m sorry, but it’s just that I can’t leave them because their important-"
"Well could you at least try!"
I stopped talking. Her eyes were looking at me with anger and sadness. She had tears on her eyes. I hate it when she cries.
"Could you at least try? I know that you’re busy but… Why can’t you understand that I love you? I miss the old us, where we are always by each other’s side. Now…"
She sniffed.
"Now, I barely feel your love anymore."
Her words rammed right through my heart like a freight train.
"Jurina…"
"I think… I think it’s best we won’t continue…"
She got up and started to grab her backpack which contains her clothes and belongings. But I stopped her by grabbing her arm.
"Jurina, please listen to me first-"
"Rena. Let go."
I hesitated, but I finally did what she told me.
I heard her sigh. And she faced me, a single tear trickling down her eye.
"It’s too late to apologize, Rena. Please don’t make this harder between us."
She started to walk towards the front door, and right before she could catch up, she turned around. She gave me a sad smile, one that my heart wrenched in continuous levels of pain.
"See you later, Rena. Good night."
And with that, she left. Leaving me with brokenheart. She didn’t recognized it but she left a huge piece of my heart, and now it was gone.
~~~
"Wow. That was a long story."
"I told you it would be long."
"Good thing I didn’t sleep during the middle."
"Mayu!"
Mayu giggles and takes a sip from her cup of coffee. She gives me a warm and innocent smile.
"I was just joking. Geez Rena, relax."
Relax. The word echoes throughtout my head. Even though I tried so hard, I always fail in the end. I sigh, and took a sip on my hot chocolate.
We are sitting in a cafe, which is near to my campus. I would always go here after school to do my homework or just hang out, with or without my friends. Currently Mayu is accompanying me in this cold Friday night. She actually begged for her to acconpany me. And of course, I gave in.
And what makes things worse is this was the same night and day that Jurina finally ended my relationship with her.
We are currently sitting at the same spot where Jurina and I used to hang out in the past, which adds up the high level of nostalgia.
Speaking of Jurina, she finally met another person to love her.
Just saying it makes my heart ache. My love for her is still strong.
She met a boy. They have been together for months now. And they look so much happier.
I sigh. God, I should really stop thinking about it.
"Still thinking of her?"
I didn’t look at her because I’m currently staring out the window. I only nod.
"Man. Heartbreaks are the worse, huh?"
I nod again and scoff. “Tell me about it.”
Fixing my gaze back to Mayu, I suddenly remember a thought.
"So, how’s you and Yuki?"
She somehow flinched and bit her lips nervously. Looking at her expression, I know that she is having the same problems I am having.
I give her a sad smile. “I’m sorry.”
She shake her head. “No, it’s okay.”
I don’t know if the story I’m telling you have a meaning of some sort.
But I know one thing from all of this.
When heartbreaks, it don’t breakeven.
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:OMG: :err: :gyaaah:
Please tell this is not true. :mon cry:
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Oh dear, but this story almost narrated my love story. :(
Great shot btw! Keep writing. :D
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Konichiwa~!
I finally get to update my AtsuMina fanfic! :D
After so long... I can now finish it. :cow:
Thanks for everyone who read this and still waited for the next update. This will be the last part so prepare yourselves!
I hope you guys enjoy this! :) And if you have any requests or suggestions, please mention me on Twitter 'cause I'm always on over there!
http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
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Ever Enough: Part Three
I never saw Minami cried so hard in all my life.
It was shocking, really. How everything came down to this point. I thought things will get better. I thought Minami would go back being the leader of the group. We thought things will go back the way it should.
Oh, how wrong we were.
I nearly forgot that life isn’t always fair.
The doctor said there’s a fifty-fifty percent chance for a recovery, but he was still wasn’t sure how long it will take. It would also include tests, operations, daily check-ups by nurses. He still wasn’t sure about all of this, but he wanted to do whatever it takes for a speedy recovery.
We only stayed silent.
I knew Minami was suffering the most. I knew she was in total shock. But she was hiding it; I couldn’t really see her face. It was concealed by her hair, and her head was facing downwards. I glanced at her folded hands. They were both trembling. Oh, how I wanted to immediately comfort. But I couldn’t, until we are in her room.
After the doctor apologized for the sudden meeting, he excused himself to check on his other patients. Cancer patients, maybe. He apologized once again and bowed, before he left the room.
Leaving the two of us sitting in silence.
I hate it. The silence. It came in the most unpredictable situation, and it’s killing me. They are many things I hate, but silence was on top of the list.
I cleared my throat, finally breaking the silence. I couldn’t go any longer to just sit here, not uttering a single word.
"Do you want to go back to your room?"
I turned to look at her. She only nodded. I guess, she doesn’t want to talk. Yet.
We went out of the doctor’s office, and walked towards her room. The journey was long and silent. I felt as if there was a longing feeling in my chest, crumpling my heart like it was paper. I couldn’t explain it. I really couldn’t.
I kept glancing at her. She… she doesn’t have any expression on her face. It was pale and distant. No hints of a shimmer in her eyes or a smile. Nothing.
I knew she was in turnmoil. But I knew that she was too afraid to show it.
We finally made it to her room. The distance from her room to the doctor’s office was not quite far, though we have to take several hallways to get to our destinations. Not too mention our walking was a bit slow, as if we were dragging both of our feet.
The moment I opened the door and both of us went inside…
She broke down.
Her legs couldn’t help her walk or stand anymore, and she fell to the floor. I was too late to catch her. And then, her sobs came.
It was loud and painful. Hearing it made my heart ache. I had seen Minami cried for the simplest things, but this was different. For goodness sake’s, she was crying because she found out she has cancer.
I couldn’t do anything much. Her body was in a fetal position, her back facing me. Both of her hands was concealing her face, trying not to let me see her tears streaming endlessly down her face. I slowly walked towards her, and laid down beside her. My arm wrapped itself around her small body, and I hold her ever so tightly in my embrace.
Her sobs turned to hiccups.
I tried to comfort her. I really did. But it failed.
We laid in the cold, sterile hospital floor in silence. Her sobs echoed throughout the room. I can only hold her in my arms, and let her cry as loud as she can. There was nothing I could do to fix things. The truth was right there, in front of our faces.
I wish life was a wish-granting factory.
After the breakdown and finally tried to calm Minami down, which took longer than I expected, we decided everyone we knee about Minami. It took awhile, we didn’t what to say. It was hard even it was via broadcast message. But we finally managed to make a decent broadcast message, and sent it to everyone.
It didn’t take less than a minute to get tons of messages and calls by almost everyone we knew.
The texts consists of how they were really surprised about Minami, and they wanted to visit as soon as possible. I took my time to read and reply every text messages, also calling back the people who left missed calls. I wasn’t really expecting this much attention.
I remembered each and everyone’s visits.
The first person to visit was Miichan. I remembered how she immediately cried when she saw Minami laying on her hospital bed in her pajamas in which she didn’t want to ever change. Her visit consists of randon conversations and laughs. It lasted for a couple of hours.
Then there was Yuko’s visit. It was a bit different than Miichan. Yuko kept throwing inappropriate jokes, funny conversations, anything Yuko does always lighten up the atmosphere. I even saw Minami laughed and smile couple of times.
But when it was time for Yuko to leave, she clinged onto Minami for dear life.
And when she was forced to leave by the nurse, she suddenly cried.
When I asked her why she wouldn’t leave, her answer was simple,
"I don’t want Takamina to leave."
In the end, she did leave. Even though she was dragged out of the room by more than one nurse.
There were so many visits I couldn’t really remembered each and ever one of them. There were tears, there were laughs, there were hugs and kisses. But I felt as if all of them are the same.
I don’t know what should I be afraid of. Losing my friend or being in this world without her presense anymore.
~~~
"What do you fear, Acchan?"
The weather wasn’t sunny or cold like it used to. There were dark luminous clouds hovering across the sky. It didn’t show any signs of rain, but I knew it will pour down any time soon. Minami and I decided to wander the hospital for a bit, and we came across a large garden at the back of the hospital. We never heard about it before, so I guess it was some sort of ‘secret garden’. It was a good thing we found out about it.
We decided to sit underneath this cherry blossom tree that was in the middle of the garden. It wasn’t spring time, so it hasn’t bloomrd yet.
I stopped staring at the dark clouds hovering above us and turned to Minami. “Me?”
She nodded. “Mhmm.”
I thought about it for awhile. My fears? I have a lot, as a matter of fact.
"Well, I feat many things," I explained. "Heights, the dark, being alone whether if it’s in a crowded or quite place. I fear the things that are simple for other people." I saw her nodding.
"What about you, Minami? What do you fear?"
She thought about her answer as well. She then took a deep breath before she answered.
"I fear the inevitable."
I was a bit confused on her answer. I was about to ask her what she meant until she beat me to it.
"I… fear of what would happen to everything after my death. I fear my own being after I died, where would it go and what will it be." She took a deep breath before explaining again. "I always wonder what would happen to you, Yuko, Miichan, everyone I know and love. I always wonder what will happen to you guys after I permanantly leave this world. Will you cope with it? Grief? I don’t know, the curiousity is killing me."
She turned her head towards me, a gentle breeze blew past us like a whistle. “I fear the great unknown, Acchan. Even though it’s a bit weird, but that is what I fear the most.”
Somehow, I get it. I get what she meant. We live in a world where everything happens unexpectedly and without the human consciousness to help us. No one can predict what will occur next, except God himself. That’s what scares us. You don’t know what’s gonna happen next, whether if it’s a good or bad thing.
Somehow, sitting underneath this cherry blossom tree with her made me realized her deepest feelings towards the world. It was a relief. I can now understand what she had been thinking all this time.
We both felt a couple droplets hitting our skin, warning us that rain was about to fall soon. I helped her up and gently set her down onto her wheelchair. I quickly wheeled her inside so she won’t get soaked. I’m not worried about myself; I’m just worried about her.
The journey to her room was silent, but it was a good silent. No awkwardness, no tension. Just two people walking along a hallway, enjoying each other’s company. I wish it was like this days before.
We made it to her room, and I wheeled her in. I stopped the wheelchair near the bed and went up front of Minami. I slowly yet carefully carried her bridal style to the bed, her cheeks blushing by my action. I gently set her down the bed, and pulled the covers over her body minus the head.
My fingers kept stroking her hair as I couldn’t help but stare at her. She was just so innocent and still young and full of energy. Why must she be suffering?
I sighed. “I’ll come back tomorrow. Okay?”
She nodded and gave me a weak smike. “Okay.”
I leaned in closer to her and gave her a long kiss on the forehead. I pulled back and stroke her hair one last time. I smiled sadly. “Okay.”
"Wait. Can you buy me some flowers?" She asked with pleading eyes.
I looked at her in confusion. “For what?”
She shrugged and fiddled with both of her fingers. “I just want to smell them. It’s been so long since I smell flowers. I missed their scent.”
I smiled. I love how she was showing her cute side to me. I ruffled her hair. “Sure. I’ll buy you some.”
She smiled at me weakly. “Thanks Acchan.”
I nodded. And then I left her room, still confused why would she want me to buy her flowers.
~~~
'I hope she will like these.'
I clutched the bouquet of flowers in my hands as I walked naturally through the hallways. I wanted to visit her as soon as possible, since she will be having an operation today. And before that, I want to give her these. As a sign of ‘good luck for the operation’.
I quickly hurried to her room which was at the end on of the hallway. My heart seemed to fluttered for an unknown reason. I couldn’t help but smile.
But my smile didn’t last long, though. Once I had reached her room, I noticed that the door of her room was slightly open.
Confusion strucked me. Normally, she never let her door opened in the slightest. Then… why was it opened?
Still confused, I walked towards her room frantically. Once I was at the door, I slowly peaked inside as I slowly nudged it so I could fit through the small opening.
"Hello?"
I saw Minami’s nurse inside. Sakura was her name, but I often like to call her Sakura-chan or Sakuchan just to tease her. She was four years younger than me, which was why I called her with ‘chan’. She was nealing down towards the bed which was being tidied by her. She had a small frown on her face, but I didn’t know what’s the reason behind it.
I saw Sakura, but I didn’t see Minami.
I walked in slowly, the door made a slight creaking sound once I gently pushed it inside. Sakura was slightly alarmed, because she immediately looked up with a surprised expression. When she saw that it was me, she gave me a smile that seemed fake. Too fake.
"Ah, Acchan. I didn’t expect to see you here," Sakura said softly, still giving me her smile and bowed politely. I bowed back.
"Same here." I smiled and looked around the room. It didn’t change that much, but it was missing a certain person. A certain person I was looking for. I looked back at Sakura.
"Um, Sakura-chan? Where’s Minami?"
As soon as the words flew out of my mouth, Sakura’s smile falttered. Her head bowed down onto the floor, both of her hands folded in front. I was getting confused. Where was Minami?
She shuffled her foot against the floor in a nervous way.
And then, she spoke.
"I’m really sorry, Acchan."
I felt the whole world caved in on me once I heard those words.
I felt the grip I had on the flowers in my hand loosened, and it fell onto the white sterile floor. It landed with a small thud. I felt a sudden wave of nausea surrounding my head. I felt the whole world crashing into me.
No. No. No. No, this wasn’t true.
"She died two hours before her operation." She let out a shaky breath. "She didn’t want me to tell you. I’m really sorry, Acchan."
My lips trembled. It hit me right there. Square in the face. Time seemed to stop. I couldn’t hear anything. The only sound I heard was the sound of my heart breaking.
She can’t be… She can’t just left right away. She was supposed to have an operation today. How the fuck she left just like that?!
… I guess, death couldn’t wait for her any longer.
I saw Sakura shifted uncomfortably, as silence filled the room. I heard her clear her throat.
"I guess… I guess I should leave you alone for now. Call or text me if you need anything," Sakura said. She bowed, almost hesitantly, and scurried herself out of the room.
And with that, I was left alone. One of my fears.
I looked down onto the flowers that had fallen onto the floor. I bought them. I bought them for her. It was meant for her. I didn’t know what should I do with it. Now that I know that she’s gone…
I felt a sudden pang of nostalgia as I remembered my memories with her.
I slowly nealed down and took the flowers into my hands. I looked at it, noticing a pink card that was sticked in the middle. It was wrote by me.
'Good luck with your operation! :) - Acchan'
I bit my lip. No. I didn’t want to cry just yet.
I took a seat on the chair next to the bed. The seat where I always sit on as I talked endlessly with Minami. The seat where I held her precious little hand when she slept peacefully. The seat where I sit when there was many visits from our friends and families. The seat of inifinite memories I recalled during her worst days.
I laid both of my hands on her bed. Used to be her bed. I was still clutching on the bouquet of flowers for dear life.
I guess… She wanted me to buy her flowers. Because she was going to die the next day.
…
I took a deep breath. But I couldn’t hold it anymore.
I broke down onto her bed, hiding my head under my arms. The tears streamed endlessly like a river from my eyes to the white bed sheet. My sobs got louder and louder every minute. It hurts. It hurts so much. She left too soon.
Bakamina. You idiot. You should’ve just told me.
But I couldn’t blame her. I just couldn’t.
"Minami…"
My sobs gotten louder and louder every second. This was the worst feeling I had ever felt in all my life.
'T-thank you… I really don't know what to say.'
With each passing memory, it stabbed my heart wih so much pain and agony.
'It's no big deal. Oh, and I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Maeda Atsuko, but my friends calls me Acchan. You can call me by that nickname if you want…'
'I'm Takahashi Minami, thought my friends call me Takamina. It's nice to meet you…'
'Nice to meet you too…'
"Nande? Nande nande nande…"
She left too fucking soon. Why would she do that? Why would God do that?
"Nande…"
Minami. There’s so much things I want to tell you.
I love you. I really do. I love you, and there’s no point I would be lying about it. I love you, and there’s no force in this world that could ever change my mind. I love you… I love you too much. And it hurts so bad.
I wanted to tell you. But I was afraid. Afraid of loosing you. But now… I already did.
Minami.
After all that I’ve done to you, after so many years we’ve been through from start to finish…
Is it ever enough?
-
Konichiwa~
I'm back with a new oneshot! Yeay~
I hope you guys enjoy this! And don't forget to follow me on Twitter!
http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
-----
Charming (WMatsui)
"Churi, I have told you many times. I don’t want to go!”
"Oh, c’mon Rena! How can you not come to your own company’s first year anniversary after twelve months of fine success? Tell me, Rena!"
Flinching from the loud voice over the other line, Rena pulled her phone away from her ear in reflex. She expected a small and calm call from her close friend after a long day filled with meetings and sponsors, but it was a tad different in Churi’s mind. Rena didn’t want to get any more of her headaches again, but clearly her friend wasn’t helping her that much.
Rena sighed and rubbed her forehead, trying to calm the intense headaches storming her head. She didn’t any of this things to stress her out. All she wanted to lay on the couch, just like she was doing now, and watch television with her foot on the coffee table.
"Do I really need to go?" Rena asked, exasperated. Her legs were still sore, and the constant waves of nausea wasn’t helping her either.
"Of course you need to go! You’re the owner and founder of your own company, for crying out loud. I don’t want people to think that you don’t want people to think that you are dragging your lazy ass just to show up on your company’s-"
"Alright! Fine!" Rena exclaimed, having enough of her friend’s rants. Her world started to spin uncontrollably until she interrupted it. She only wanted Churi to stop talking. "Fine, I’ll go. But you are so treating me lunch the day after!"
Rena heard a giggle from the other line. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever, at least you’ll get to come. Okay, I gotta go now. I’ll text you later, okay? Goodbye~”
Then, there was a click. And the call was over.
Rena groaned in frustration. The many times her friends had dragged her into these kinds of situations. She didn’t understand why her friends won’t get that all she wanted to do was rest? It was one of her unanswered mysteries.
She threw her phone aside, her eyes settling upon the television which was showing a re-run of a late night talkshow. But her mind was somewhere else.
She knew that she was too tired and lazy to come to some event that was only held each year after a commercial success. But she also knew that her friends would drag her to coming. And right now, she doesn’t want to argue with them.
Rena sighed in defeat.
'There goes my weekend.'
~~~
"See, I knew you would come!"
Rena already knew the fact that her closest friend would say that immediately when she spotted her walking down towards the grand hall.
A long, red dress; it was the attire Rena was wearing once she arrived at the anniversary.
She didn’t expexted many people to come, sincr she thought no one would come to an event on a Saturday night. But she guessed she had gotten quite a big sucess for the past twelve months, so maybe it did deserved some sort of celebration. And the celebration was at a grand hall in a five-star hotel.
Rena didn’t know how much time and money did the company used up just to make the event in only a day, but she knew it might’ve taken a lot.
Rena smiled slightly and waved at her friend who was walking towards her. In her opinion, Churi’s dress was also splendid; a dark brown dress that went down over her legs with her hair in wavy forms. She was beautiful, Rena admitted. It was a matter of time before someone fancy her.
"So, how is it going for you?" Churi asked before taking a sip of her wine.
Rena shurgged casualy, and walked towards the nearest buffet table that served the drinks. She picked a glass over hundreds of others and took a small sip of the wine. Grape, Rena thought. Somehow, a very different taste of grape.
"It’s going good, I guess," Rena said, looking around the hall that was filled with many peoples from different companies and also staffs and employees that were invited as well. Rena took another sip of her drink. "A lot of people are congratulating me, though."
"Well, duh. You’re the owner of the company," Churi teased, gently nudging Rena’s shoulder. "Nice dress, by the way. Are you wearing it for… someone special?"
Rena scoffed and rolled her eyes when Churi gave her a look and a playful wink.
"Very funny. I thought you and Airin know that I’m currently not into anyone right now." Rena took another sip of her drink. "Relationships are just a big waste of time."
It was Churi’s turn to roll her eyes. “Whatever you say, Rena. But remember, the time will come…”
Rena turned her towards Churi and raised her eyebrow in confusion. “Time of what?”
Instead of responding, Churi’s eyes lit up and smiled excitedly. She waved her hands in the air to someone out of Rena’s point of view. The pale-skinned girl looked behind her to see who her friend was waving to. Her eyes fell upon Airin, sitting on one of the white-clothed tables not so far from the two girls were standing.
"I’ll tell you later, Rena. I gotta go meet Airin first. Bye!"
And with that, Rena was left on her own.
Rena sighed. She began to play around with the glass of wine on her hand, her attention not really full on her surroundings. She wanted someone to accompany her, or at least, talk to her for a good amount of time so this so-called ‘anniversary event’ won’t be such a boring event. But again, she was ditched.
She didn’t really liked the event anyway. It was too crowded and loud, that type of environment doesn’t really suit her very well.
Rena was about to go ahead and get herself another drink, when a voice stopped her from doing so.
"Well, it sure is crowded."
Rena expected to be either a half-drunken business who was hitting on every girl around the hall or just another stranger congratulating her. But both of her theories were wrong. The voice she heard was feminine, and not drunk at all.
She turned her head around, and her eyes immediately fell upon onto a fascinating sight.
It was a surprise to find a girl, who’s features were so much younger than her, wearing a suit that was wore by many male visitors of the events. But in Rena’s eyes, it awfully suited the girl she was looking at. Short black hair, soft-looking skin with the most darkest orbs in her eyes. The girl’s lips was tilted slightly onto the side. Her eyes were looking forward towards the ton of people at the hall, as it increased more and more.
In her eyes, the girl looked incredibly handsome. And that was only the appearance.
Rena nodded in agreement on what the girl with black suit had said. “Yeah, it is. I never really expected this much people to come.”
"Why won’t they?" The girl turned her full body towards Rena. She smiled warmly. "You really achieved something big in just a year. That deserves a big celebration, you know. So… congratulations!"
Rena smiled, admiring the girl’s excitement. “Thank you. It really means a lot to me.”
The girl slightly bowed in response, which was a bit weird for Rena.
"Jurina."
"What?" Rena asked, confused.
"My name’s Jurina. What’s yours?" The girl finally admitted her name.
"Rena. Matsui Rena. And you Jurina, are you a little bit young to be working in a company?" Rena wanted to tease the girl a little, just to enlighten the mood.
"I’m 16, and yes I am young to be working in a company." Jurina smirked in confidence when she had made the pale girl in front looking at her, dumbfounded.
Jurina chuckled. In her opinion, Rena looked quite cute when she was shocked.
"Well, I guess we should find a place to sit." And with that, the young girl walked away trying to find an empty table for the two of them. While dragging a still shocked Rena in her hand.
~~~
"Aren’t you supposed to be in high school, Jurina?"
The two young girls had found a perfect spot for them to talk, a table on the the second floor that overlooked the grand hall which was crowded by many guests and workers alike who were invited to the event. Rena still didn’t know how did her co-workers set up an event this big. It must’ve been pretty hard to invite so many people like this, Rena thought deeply. She made a mental note to thank her co-workers afterwards.
The two girls decided to get something to eat, since both of their stomaches has not yet been filled for quite awhile. They stopped by the buffet and get as much food as they wanted that will satisfy their hungry mouths.
Jurina took a sip of her glass of water before responding Rena’s question.
"I do attend high school, but I also work during weekends and after school if I have the time. It was actually my parents’ company, but now I inherited it."
Rena nodded, eating her food that was half finished. She asked again with her mouth full, “Oh really? Why is that?”
"Oh, my parents died in a car accicent a few months ago."
The sentence nearly made Rena choked on her food. She quickly drink her glass of water, letting the food slowly descending to her stomach. Once she finally calmed down, she glances at Jurina. The young girl seemed to be just fine, as she quietly ate her food in good manners. No signs of sadness, neither a frown.
Rena seemed confused at first. But instantly felt sorry for Jurina. She was just an ordinary high school girl who was pulled into the adult world after the deaths of her parents. Rena regretted a thousand times for asking her such question.
"I’m so sorry… I didn’t meant to ask you…"
Jurina smiled and shook her head. “No, it’s fine Rena-chan. I’m used to being asked like that. I’m not griefing anymore, which is good though,” Jurina drank her glass before continuing. “In fact, I think it’s not good to grief for so long. If you are still griefing over someone’s death, that means you aren’t ready to let them go. So, I didn’t grief anymore. And look how happy I am now!”
Rena looked at Jurina in bewildered. She had never met a girl young as her so wise and… so mature. As if, she was already an adult. A very charming and wise adult who acted very mature. It was shocking, really. But it was a good kind of shock.
'Her smile. And her dimples,' Rena thought. 'I have never met anyone so.. different than her. And by the looks of it, she's not faking her happiness.'
Rena smiled. She continued to eat her food as she continued to thought of Jurina and how much she admired her. Slowly at first, and all at once.
"I guess I shouldnt’ve judged you, Jurina…"
Rena didn’t realized she had said her thoughts aloud just enough for Jurina to hear.
"Judged me by what, Rena-chan?"
Rena looked up from her plate and to Jurina, who was giving her a questioning look. The young girl had just finished eating her food, while Rena’s plate was still full. But she was too full to eat another bite.
"Well… It’s just that, you look like you’re just talking to me only for showing off your charms and getting me into bed."
Just as the words left Rena’s mouth, the young girl flinched, her face showing signs of hurt and discomfort. She clenched her fists tightly. Rena already knew that Jurina was offended by her words.
Just when Rena was about to apologize, she was interrupted.
"Yeah, I get that a lot…"
Rena was left in shock. She didn’t expected Jurina to get the same comment by anyone else.
"Ever since my parents died, I was homeschooled. I didn’t have the energy to go to my actual school. My so-called friends quickly forgot about me, so I was friendless. And every time I tried to make friends or simply just talk to anyone, they all thought of the same thing as you did; trying to get them into bed with me, even thought I’m not trying to…" Jurina explained, with each and every word she said left an ache in her heart.
The older girl couldn’t help but felt guilty.
Guilty of thinking such things about Jurina, Nd guilty because of believing her co-workers words. How Jurina was some sort of playgirl and only tried to talk to somebody whenever she wanted them to have sex with her. She believed in those lies. But right now, she immediately put them aside. Because it was lies all along.
Rena’s hand gently laid itself on top of Jurina’s, giving it a tight squeeze of assurance. Jurina’s eyes looked up and stopped at Rena’s. Their gaze are locked upon each other, and they were lost in both of their admiration for each other.
Jurina smiled sadly, and turned her hand so she was holding Rena’s hand as well, the warmth of it felt like home.
"I’m really sorry…"
Jurina shook her head. She gave the older girl’s hand a tight squeeze.
"There’s no harm done, Rena. After all, I never let these things worry me that much."
Rena only nodded. Though she still felt sorry for the young girl. The girl really suffered a lot in her age.
~~~
"Mou, why didn’t I brough a jacket with me? It’s cold outside!"
"I told you it was a bad idea, Rena-chan."
Both of them had left the event earlier than the given time. Rena didn’t want to be in a room full of people for too long, so she wanted to fo home. Jurina offered to drive her home, much to Rena’s surprise. Even though the older girl insisted that she could go home by taxi, Jurina techincally forced Rena to let her drive her home safely.
It left a warm feeling in Rena’s heart.
And here they were, in the parking lot outside of the large hotel. Rena immediately regretted not bring her jacket since the evenig often gets too cold to handle. And right now, the older girl was shivering violently as she embraced herself trying to preserve the remaining heat from her body.
Jurina, who was looking at Rena the whole time, couldn’t stand her being this cold. So, she slowly took of her black suit and drww it over Rena’s body. Rena was startled at the action, and looked at Jurina in surprise.
When Jurina flashed a charming smile at her, she couldn’t help but blush.
They had finally arrived to Jurina’s car. Acting like a true gentleman, Jurina opened the door for the older girl to enter, whom thanked her for the generous move. The young girl quickly went to the driver’s seat and started the engine.
They buckled their seatbelts and their off to Rena’s house.
After a few minutes of fast driving due tot he empty streets, they had finally reached the residence of Matsui Rena.
Rena unbuckled her seatbelt, and turned to Jurina. She smiled kindly at her before saying, “Thanks for tonight, Jurina. I had really fun time to be honest.”
Jurina smiled and nodded slightly. “I’m glad that you did. I had fun too, Rena-chan.”
Rena got out of the black sedan, and closed the door. Just as she was to turn around towards her house, she heard Jurina calling her out.
"Wait!"
Rena turned around, and looked at Jurina with a questioning look. “Yes, Jurina?”
Jurina was a bit hesitant, but still responded.
"Can I have your number? Or maybe Twitter and Google+… Well, if you want to…"
Rena giggled. She had admired Jurina’s shyness whenever she showed it. These are one of the times.
After writing down on a piece of paper, she handed it to Jurina through the windshiled.
"Don’t be afraid to stalk me anytime." Rena winked, and with that, she turned around and walked into her house.
Jurina was still surprised of how easy it was to ask for the older girl’s number. She expected an imidiate denial, but it looked like she had thought wrong.
She looked down at the paper in her hand. Rena had wrote down her number, Twitter and even her Google+. Though what caught her attention was the messagd below the list.
'Call me whenever you want to meet again~ - Rena-chan'
Jurina chuckled slightly. And turned her head, looking at Rena’s house.
She sighed.
"God damn, she really is something."
-
Hey guys, I’m back again~
I wanna try a new ship, so I decided to go ahead and try this one. I hope everyone still likes this ship.
Enjoy! And don’t forget to follow me on Twitter!
http://twitter.com/AryaMahdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMahdi)
———
This Is What It Feels Like: Part 1
(http://media.tumblr.com/ed3636ae12b9624153a7893f74fd4bb4/tumblr_inline_mtvqheR23C1qi8p1b.jpg)

I never knew what it’s like to ‘feel’.
It wasn’t the ability to feel things I touched or saw, but the ability to feel. To feel the emotions and feelings inside. To feel the warm sensation bubbling up in my chest. To feel my heart skipping a beat when I saw someone I truly loved or attracted to. To feel anything. I always wanted to.
But every time I tried to, I always failed.
The thing was… I was a cold person.
Both my personality and appearance had always let people to drew farther away from me. Like I was some kind of monster. But, maybe I was. Maybe I had always been acting so cold towards people. Maybe it was because of that, I never had any friends. No one to accompany me or even love, excluding my parents. Maybe. I didn’t know.
I tried to change. I really did. But this cold and monster-like personality never left me.
I guess it was fate. Me being like this.
My hope was hanging on a thin thread. It’ll be soon before I had lost every single piece of hope I was holding onto.
But I was still hoping. For a change.
I will keep on waiting until it happens.
~~~
'When will this class end?'
I thought frustratingly, laying my head on top of my arms which was on my desk. I closed my eyes, trying to fall asleep but obviously I couldn’t. Considering how the class was really noisy and I couldn’t really get used to noisy places. But I still tried to sleep.
Another typical day at school. What a dreadful place to be.
It wasn’t because of how the students here treated me, because it’s not. I was already used to the name calling, cold glares, snickers, whispers and rumours. They barely affected my personality, not even my grades which was astoundingly high in my grade.
But nowadays, no one really gives a shit about grades. As long as they passed every tests and exams, they will be in a safe zone.
Today was a typical Friday; Having only two subjects and PE class, having a much longer break time than most days, and more students to make some noise in the class. Yes, what a dreadful life indeed.
I sighed. Good thing it was the last subject of the day. I cannot wait to get home and went straight to my room, maybe even play with my laptop if I wanted to.
I felt a tug of slumber pulling me into sleep, and I didn’t resist. I let it pull me into the soothing sounds of darkness and peace. Finally, I could get some rest after two hours of Physical Education that left me breathless.
As I was so close to sleeping, I heard the classroom door opening and a deep voice speaking out.
"Everyone!"
Immediately, everyone in the room shut up. They went to their respectful seats and turned their full attention to their class president, Shinoda Mariko. She was a very nice girl, to be honest. I always brushed her off when she tried to befriend me, but she never gave up. Secretly, I admired the girl. She was far more nicer than the devils in uniforms I had for classmates.
"I want to inform you guys that we have a new student joining our class," Mariko announced, and it wasn’t for long that the whole class started whispering and saying things out of my leisure. Luckily, Mariko was able to shut them up again.
"Alright then. I guess it’s time to introduce her to you guys," Mariko said, turning her face towards the door and smiled kindly. "Come on in, Jurina. Don’t be shy."
Just as the person was told, she walked into the room. And I couldn’t help but look at her as she walked in.
The person was a girl, much more younger than me to be exact. She has short hair, a skinny yet curvy body, and has eyes that resembled the darkest orbs. Her lips was tilted to the side, showing a small cat-like smirk. I sensed a boyish aura surrounding her, somehow a popular one too. I heard a faint whistle from one of the students in the class.
Yes. She was pretty cute. I will give you that.
The girl stood in front of the class, her smile grewing wider. Then, she introduced herself in a cheery voice.
"Konichiwa! My name is Matsui Jurina, I’m 16 years old and I recently just moved to Tokyo. I hope I could get to be friends with you all!"
This girl. She looked different. Very different. She has a similar personality like Mariko, but there was another catch. Somehow. I didn’t know, I sensed it, not knew it.
Mariko smiled and nodded. “Alright then. Thanj you very much for your introduction, Jurina. I hope you will like your new school, and also your new class. Okay now, you go on ahead and sit next to…” She began to scan the room, trying to fine an empty seat. I prayed that she didn’t picked me.
Oh, look. She did. With an obvious smirk on her face. Great, just great.
"You could sit next to Mayu! She’s the one on the left side in the third row," Mariko said, somehow smugly. I knew she was planning this along. There was no denying it. I saw Jurina nodding her head, and started to walk towards my desk.
"Hi, Jurina!" A group of girls in front of me called her. The latter just smiled and responded back with a cute ‘hi’. The girls started squealing for an unknown reason. I tried so hard not to roll my eyes. The girls in my class are such total fangirls.
Jurina had reached her destination, which was my desk. She smiled at me ever so kindly, and waved her hand a little shyly. “H-Hi, Mayu-san…”
Badump.
I felt as if my heart just skipped a beat. This was so surreal. I never felt like this towards anything and anyone. But, somehow this girl made it happen. The cold feeling in my chest started to fade. And I felt my cheeks flustering.
My response came out as a stutter.
"H-Hi… Um, n-nice to meet you…"
Jurina kept smiling innocently and nodded her head in response. She gently laid her back on top of the desk and sat down right beside me. For a moment, our shoulders gently touched. And suddenly, I felt electricity coursing through my body.
Badump. There goes the second time.
"Okay, I guess that’s all. Everyone must treat Jurina kindly, since she is a new student. Please make her feel comfortable and try not to do anything immature to her," Mariko said sharply in the end as she sent a deadly glare at the boys around the room. They all shuddered in fear. "Anyways, that is all. Thanks for all of your attention, and-"
The school bell rang loudly all of a sudden.
Mariko smiled and bowed slightly. “Have a nice weekend.” She left the room, and the moment her foot stepped out, everyone in the room started to get up from their desks and packed up their belongings. Some boys started shouting at each other, throwing each other books of many kinds. Even the girls started to laugh and talk loudly, preferably about Jurina.
As for me, I calmly sat up and packed my books away. Like any other student would do.
After I was done packing, I scurried out of the room before things get loud. I even thought I heard someone shouting my name from behind, but I decided to ignore it.
I finally made it out of the school, after numerous of times where everyone started to shove past me in the crowded corridors. I was too lazy to put my stuff into my locker, so I was carrying everything in my bag. I pulled the top jacket over my head, sealing my face towards everyone and shoved my hands into my pockets. By this rate, I looked like a complete outcast. An introvert. But I guess they were both true.
I was about to leave the school gates and walked towards the street where my house stood, I heard someone shouting my name.
"Mayu-san!"
I turned around. And to my surprise, it was Jurina.
I looked at her in shock as she ran towards me, a wide smile plastered across her face. Was this girl following me or what?
I raised an eyebrow after I regained my composure. “Yeah. What is it that you want?” I asked rather coldly, expecting her to look hurt or just walked away in anger. But she didn’t. She just kept smiling at me like a little child.
"Ano, I was wondering if I could walk home with you. Our houses are on the same streets, mine’s a couple blocks away!" Jurina said, a little cheery if you asked me. She looked so eager to hear me answer, and it was really cute to be honest. Just looking at her face like that made myself hard to reject her offer.
I pondered for a while, and shrugged both of my shoulders casually. I don’t see any harm done for the new student walking home with me.
"I don’t see why not. But don’t try to do anything stupid along the way," I said, still having that cold tone in my voice but it felt like fading away. I warmed her with a sharp glare, but she wasn’t affected by it. Weird.
"I won’t, I promise!" She promised with a cheery tone. This girl loves to be cheerful, huh?
I nodded in response, and started to walk towards the street I was heading. I felt her figure catching up to me, and started walking beside me with a small smile on her face. I kept glancing at her, thinking her smile would’ve faded. But it didn’t.
This girl was so weird. And awfully different… A good different.
Our shoulders touched once again, and I felt my heart beating faster for the very first time. This was all so new, and so sudden. I didn’t know what this girl was doing to me. Was she changing me? Or what?
Whatever she was doing, I secretly hoped she won’t stop.
I unconsciously made a mental note of thanking Mariko for putting Jurina to sit next to me.
-
~Hi AryaMachdi-san :deco:
~I like the 2 shots of yours :wub: :wub: :wub:
~I like the pairing WMatsui and JuriMayu and also the MaYuki
~Please update soon for the JuriMayu story
~I hope you make MaYuki
~Thank You
-
Hey guys! :)
I wanted to leave my new short OS here, so that I could update my other fanfics. Sorry if it's short, I just wanted to make something quick yet worth the read. :sweatdrop:
Enjoy~ And don't forget to follow me on Twitter!
http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
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Lazy Saturday (WMatsui)
"You know Jurina, you don’t need to come to my house just to accompany me."
It was a normal Saturday morning for the residents in the Nagoya area. The weather was sunny, and in the right temperature. The sky was painted bright blue with small clouds hovering around it, like it was a painted on a canvas. In the weekends, people tend to spend their abundant time at home, or going to the local mall. It was a normal weekend routine.
A young girl like Matsui Jurina, should be doing the list above. But when she had received a certain call, she immediately cancelled her plans for the rest of the weekend.
Which leads to where she was now. At Matsui Rena’s residence.
Jurina smiled widely, her eyes leaving the washed dishes in front of her. The two girls had just finished eating breakfast, and the younger girl of the two has finally finished their plate. Aside from her, the older girl resided on the nearby couch at the living room, her body laying in a comfortable position.
"Well, is it wrong for me to spend some quality time with you?" Jurina asked questioningly, her hands rubbing on a soft cloth to dry them. Meanwhile, the other girl pondered at the thought. Until finally sighing, she responded.
"I guess it’s not…" Rena said, earning a smugly glance from Jurina whom was heading towards the bathroom to take a quick shower, since she didn’t showered in the morning due to running quickly to Rena’s house to accompany her in this lazy weekend. But right before Jurina could even turn the doorknob around, she stopped when she heard a small whine coming from the living room.
The short haired girl turned around, raising her eyebrow in question once she saw the older girl still laying in the couch, with her arms wide open. Rena’s lips turned to a pout, which one find really adorable. In this case, it was Jurina.
Jurina had finally got the sign Rena was making, and giggled slightly. Her smile grew as she walked towards the older girl. The moment she sat down onto the large couch, Rena quickly latched herself onto Jurina’s body.
Jurina was slightly surprised by the other girl’s action, but once she felt two familiar arms wrapping themselves around her while feeling a slight nuzzling feeling on her neck, she felt a strange sense of peace when Rena was close to her.
Jurina sighed. In her perspective, she wanted to make Rena let her go, but she couldn’t. She just couldn’t. Not when she was enjoying the younger girl’s company. So, Jurina let it aside and tried to enjoy it as well.
The remote on the table caught her eyes, and in instinct, she got up to grab it. But she then felt her body being pulled back down to the couch. She tried once again, but the results remain the same.
She looked at the pale skinned girl, who was still latching onto her body. Not ever wanting to let go. “Rena, let go. I’m trying to get the remote.”
Rena’s content smile faded and turned to a slight pout. Her embrace around the younger girl’s body tightened, and she let out a small grumble. One that Jurina found cute.
"Yadda…"
"Rena, please. It’ll be only for one second."
"No… I don’t want you to leave me."
Jurina rolled her eyes. Rena and her weird personality. “You know I wouldn’t leave you, right?”
"But still…" Rena whines continued. "Don’t go anywhere, stay here…"
Does Jurina still wanted to go get the remote? Yes. But due to the current position she was in, there was no way she could get away fron Rena’s embrace.
Jurina sighed in defeat. “Oh, alright…”
Rena giggled delightfully. “Thank you, Jurina.”
Jurina smiled. She always liked this side of Rena. The side where she wasn’t shy and might sometimes be a tsundere, and started being comfortable and latchy towards her. It’s a side nobody gets to see except for Jurina. And she planned to keep it that way.
Jurina pulled the older girl closer to her, her arms wrapped around the slightly skinny body. Jurina nuzzled her face onto Rena’s raven hair, inhaling the sweet scent. She wanted to be in this position for God knows how long. She will at least treasure this sweet moment of peace and serenity.
"I love you." Rena spoke after a moment of silence. "You know that, right?"
Jurina looked down at the tall girl, while the latter looked up. Their faces inch apart,waiting for one of them to sneak a kiss. Jurina beat Rena to it, leaving a small peck on the older girl’s lips. It was small, but Rena was very glad to have a morning kiss from her lover.
Their foreheads touched softly. And Jurina smiled contently.
"I know. I love you too, and I have no business on denying it."
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Kawaii fic wmatsui are the best :wriggly:
I really enjoy read this :hee:
can you make more wmatsui moments :ding:
never stop writing your fics are very good :onioncheer:
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Cute Wmatsui!!!
aw!! i have diabetes from this but i love it
thanks ^_^
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Hey yo! :cow:
I'm back. With a new AtsuMina fic! :w00t:
I haven't been writing any fanfics for my other favorite pairings, but now I have the chance something. I hope you guys enjoy! :) This fanfic is inspired by the song The Story Left Untold by Every Avenue.
Don't forget to follow my Twitter!
http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi
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Untold Story (AtsuMina)
(http://media.tumblr.com/22a6a8d25cc450252181e24792c1b0b3/tumblr_inline_mv9f4hknLn1qi8p1b.jpg)
Inseparable. It was one word that described our relationship.
Many adored us. I couldn’t count how many were there with both of my fingers, but I knew there were lots of people who liked our close relationship. The fans liked us a lot, thinking we were an adorable couple. The other members seemed to mind our relationship, because I would always caught a glimpse of them looking at us with a hint of admiration.
Above all, it seemed that everyone liked our little ‘relationship’.
I don’t know how it all started though.
Our first ever meeting didn’t came out of the blue. Maybe it was just a mere coincidence. We didn’t really knew each other back then, but I guess fate and time did its work precisely. It was after our audition for the group, and the real training started. We didn’t get to introduce one another until the very end.
Let me just say, it was awkward.
She was a bit shy and awkward as well, but we didn’t stopped our conversation. We were at the train station at night, and to my surprise, we accidentally met while waiting for our train to come to take us home. I was the one who noticed her and called out to her. She was quite strange since she barely even talk or even socialize with anyone during training.
We talked for awhile. Mainly introducing ourselves, what we do in our lives, where we live. Basic introduction for two strangers who coincidentally met.
After what seemed like an hour, her train came to take her home. Before leaving, she said to me with a warm smile.
"I guess I’ll see you tomorrow. At training, maybe."
I couldn’t help but smile as well. There was always something about her smile that just sent a warm feeling in my heart.
"Yeah, I hope so Acchan." That was the first time I called her with her nickname, and it was only accidental. But she seemed to like it though, because she giggled in delight and shook her head.
"Acchan, huh? Well, I’ll call you Takamina then." She said, walking away towards her train. Before stepping in, she waved goodbye to me. Her warm smile not leaving her face.
It was the night I wouldn’t forget in my whole life. Not to be cliche or sappy, but it’s true. I never forgot about it til today. And just like that, our friendship started.
She was different. I have other friends who are enjoyable and fun to be with too, but there was something about her which left me there fascinated by her own being. Her personality was kind of a bundled bowl of emotions, because there are days when she was happy and other says when she was not in the mood to talk to anyone. Excluding me. Whenever she needed someone to talk to, it was only who she always came to. Not our other friends like Yuko, or maybe Haruna. One time I asked her why, and she said I’m comfortable be with. I was confused then, but I completely understand now.
Her smile. It was rare. On most occasions, she had this odd straight face that revealed no emotions. As if though she not interested in any of the activities or events she kept coming. But there precious moments when I could caught smiling widely, or even laughing in her own adorable way. I treasured those moments. As I said, they were rare moments.
She was a clingy person. Literally. She couldn’t stop hugging me, or even giving me sneaky kisses on the cheek or lips whenever I wasn’t looking. It wasn’t annoying, but cute in my opinion. There were also numerous of times where she said ‘I love you’ to me, but I didn’t know if it was platonic or romantic. But I always did said the same thing back to her. And the feeling was real.
I never doubted my feelings towards her. Because I knew they were real.
And to my shock, she never doubted hers either. And instantly, we were a couple in secret.
The public, including fans, would had been in total shock if we would ever announced our current relationship. The public might be the one in shock, but I guess the fans could be really happy for us. That their long awaited ‘AtsuMina’ had come to life. We would laugh along with them. But we didn’t. Because we vowed not to tell anyone about our relationship.
First, the society. It was a taboo. Some sort of sin. A forbidden act of love towards two individuals. People will think negatively, and those negative thoughts will continue to spread all around, leaving hurtful lies about us. We didn’t want that. And we didn’t care what people said. I thought love was supposed to be equal. So why didn’t we have the rights to fall in love? It was our love, our problems. Not theirs.
Second, disapproval from the group. I would think that Aki-P would kick us out of the group the moment who knew we were lovers. Because he doesn’t want any relationships between members. I didn’t want to leave AKB, neither does Atsuko.
Atsuko. Acchan. Same names, but different meanings.
We kept it secret for God knows how long. Neither of us would tell our secret to our other close friends, not because we couldn’t trust them. We were just paranoid that our love must come to an end if something bad happened to either one of us. So, this secret stayed being a secret.
There were times we would argue about this. Our relationship, our secret, our friends. Anything we are afraid to face in the future.
There were time where she would just broke down and cry.
She kept telling that she couldn’t take it anymore. She doesn’t want the two of us to go on any further, and saying of how she was sick of keeping our relationship. She kept saying she doesn’t want to hurt the two of us if anything ever happened that could ruin our love. I remembered her tears. Her broken smile. Her warm body against mine as I tried so hard to calm her down, even though I couldn’t.
It was hard. It was a hard time for the both of us. But we kept going on.
Until the one fateful day when she announced graduation.
My world completely stopped when the person herself announced it in front of all of the group. Everyone was shocked and taken aback, but I think I was the one suffering from it the most.
I didn’t talk to her a few days before her graduation concert. I continued to ignore her calls and worried text messages as I started drift away into dark, empty void in my chest.
A part of me wanted to hate her. Hate her for leaving me in the group with all the work and stress, and putting up on my shoulders. For leaving me to with the difficulty of leading the group alone. For leaving me behind out of all people… And for leaving me with my ever lasting love I had for you.
But I knew I couldn’t. I would never get angry at her.
So as I watched her last performance on stage, the tears never stopped flowing down her eyes like a river, the feeling of nostalgia suddenly crept up. I’m going to terribly miss her. I’m going to miss her smile, her presence around me, her cute laugh, her clingy personality. I’m going to miss us. Our days filled with ups and downs, we were always there for each other. Now, they were just going to be memories stored inside my head.
I hugged her so tightly and revealed the tears I’ve been holding on stage as I found her backstage, and in an instant, I ran towards her. Giving our final goodbye and embrace for each other.
Was it painful? Was it sad? Was it heart-wrenching? Yes. All three of them were correct.
I still love her after she left the group to pursue her acting career. I still love her even though I barely see her anymore. I still yearn for her return. I hope she still loves me. Because, I still love her when I heard the rumors.
She found a boyfriend.
I didn’t believe it was true. I kept saying to myself that it wasn’t true, and people made it up for stupid attention. But when I kept hearing everyday throughout the group, and celebrity websites all over the internet are also talking about it, I couldn’t help but finally believe in it.
I sulked in bed every night after practice.
I continued to think of the words she had kept saying to me back when we were close. So close. Now we’re so far away.
Atsuko… Do you ever meant what you said all those years ago?
Do your ‘I love you’s’ mean anything?
Do you really love me?
If you do… Why would you find someone else to love you?
"I love you, Takamina. I will always love you, unless you love me too."
"Of course I love you, Acchan. I told you I will never doubt my love for you."
"That’s good to hear. Because I already know you love me, you midget."
"Oi!"
Have you doubt your love for me, Atsuko?
Was your love even real?
But no matter what happens, if you love me or not, I will still keep loving you. I don’t need your answer or any returned feelings. All I need is you by my side. Is that too much to ask?
After all, like I said to you, I will never doubt my love for you.
And our story will forever be remain untold.
-
That was truly beautiful, its like that really happened between the two of them.
I can really feel Minami's pain, I hope for her that Atsuko's boyfriend rumor is not true as well, but till today, we still don't really know the truth... unless I'm behind and wasn't aware that she confirmed it... >_>
Forever AtsuMina, they are Eternal :heart:
p.s. Hope you write more :)
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Ohhhhhh! it´s very sentimental!
I don´t care if Acchan have boyfriend I like atsumina fanfics !!
Thanks for it!
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wow long time no see JuriMayu fic! :twothumbs
thank you! :yossi:
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oh my god....
why is soooo sad... :cry:
it's like is really happen...
but who care????
AtsuMina is everlasting :twothumbs
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Still believe in atsumina!!
or still believe that minami really loves atsuko.....
thanks
TnT....
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Hey! I’m back with a quick oneshot. :D
I love KojiYuu but I barely write any fics about it, so now I’m writing this short oneshot just to fill in the void in my heart. :oops:
Enjoy~ the song which inspired is Almost Is Never Enough by Ariana Grande feat. Nathan Skyes.
Don’t forget to follow my Twitter! :)
http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi
———
Almost In Love (KojiYuu)
Ever get that irritating feeling?
That feeling of seeing someone that you love so deeply, so real that you wouldn't think it was a hallucination or a mind, love someone else.
I don’t think it’s irritating anymore. It’s already heart-wrenching to see it every single day.
I accepted the fact that she loved someone else other than me, and I accept how she will be better off with that person. But, there are numbers of times when we were together, I would always think something like…
'Get a grip on yourselves. She doesn't love you, she loves her.'
This puts me in a state of consciousness were I blocked all human contact around me and act like an emotionless being. No emotions, no reflexes, no reactions to anything. Just putting up this weird mask over my face.
This is if I was with her. Close enough to feel both of our skin touched in contact. Whether they were just a simple brush of our shoulders, or her arm wrapping itself in mine as we walked along the streets like a happy couple.
Except the last part wasn't true.
She has a girlfriend outside of the group.
We both knew it was a rule breaker for having any sort of affair with anyone, whether if it was with a girl or a boy, outside and inside of the group. And it will lead to unfaithful consequences, including dismembering. And we both don’t want that. We already treated AKB like our own family and our own life. Without it, what will we be?
So, I promised her that I won’t tell anyone. For her sake, and my undying feelings towards her.
This had been going for several months. And thankfully, neither of us got caught.
She was off happily enjoying her secret relationship. And me? Heh, I was a totally different story. Far different from her.
"Yuu-chan!"
I was busy typing an important mail for my mother who had been sending mails for the past week, when my ears perked up to the sound of the person I dare called her by her nickname I gave her. And before I knew it, I felt her body pressed up against mine as she gave me a side hug.
Her warmth was so familiar. And yet, so nostalgic.
I giggled playfully, and leaned my head against the side of her cheek. “Hi, Nyan Nyan.”
I felt her head leaning closely to my face ad she trief to get a better view to see what I was typing. “Who are you typing to?”
"Hm?" I hummed, my head busy focusing on the mail I was typing on my phone. "Oh, I’m writing a mail for my mom. You know how she is when I don’t reply her mail."
"Mm, I see…" was her only reply to me. After that, we were silence.
We like to stay in that position for a long period of time. Whether in private or in public. It was a sign of our close friendship, a sight so familiar and normal to see for the staffs and members. They don’t mind us being like this, so we kept on doing this.
That was before she had gotten into a relationship.
"Ne, Yuu-chan. Let’s have a sleepover at my apartment."
In the inside, I was really shocked. Because as long as I know, neither of us got any time to do a sleepover at both of our houses. Her being busy with her secret and private relationship and me busy with AKB. So much difference, so little time to relax with one another.
But I kept my emotions bottled up inside me, revealing this emotionless face. I was still typing my mail.
"I thought you have a date with her today."
I didn't have the guts to say the name of her lover. Maybe I was trying to avoid myself from having another tear-jerking heartbreak. But in conclusion, I will not say her name. It will take more than just willpower to make me spell out her name.
"I told her that I already plans with you, and she said she was alright with it. She even agreed that you and I haven’t been hanging out like usual." She said, wearing her perfect smile. Her eyes full of hope, but I couldn't help but not smile back at her. I just don’t feel any happiness or excitement. Just a dull feeling in my chest.
I sighed, finishing my mail and finally sending it to my mother with a simple click of the ‘send’ button on screen. I locked my phone, the screen fading into black in just a mere second.
"I’m sorry, Nyan Nyan. I have lots of things to do after practice," I said, trying to sound disappointed. "Plus, I don’t want to ruin your date. You guys barely have enough time to be together, so I think you deserve at least one date tonight." I showed her my signature smile, but it was obvious for me that it was fake.
But still, she pouted and looked at me disappointingly. Then, she pulled out her pinkie, and just like a little kid, asked me with her lips still pouting.
"Promise me that we could do it tomorrow? I miss spending my time with you, Yuko."
She only called me Yuko if she was saying something serious and demanded my full attention. This was one of those times. And I couldn't say no to her whenever she was this serious. And her face. Her pouting face was, how can I say this, adorable in her own natural way. She was perfect, if you asked me. Perfect body, perfect breasts, and cute yet familiar voice. Not to be a pervert (because I already am), but I’m just speaking out the truth.
I smiled after a couple of seconds, and nodded. My finger wrapped itself around hers as a sign of promised being sealed.
"I promised." I smiled widely, and so does she. And we both shared a good laugh.
Until…
"Nyan Nyan!"
Her face turned towards the direction of the voice, and when she found out who it was, she smiled widely and ran towards the person herself. And they both enveloped into a tight embrace.
"Mari-chan!"
Yes, that’s right.
Shinoda Mariko. Close friend of mine, and lover of Kojima Haruna.
Just seeing this sort of affection made me want to doubt my whole existence. Can’t they see I’ve suffered enough? Oh right, they can’t. Because they don’t think I’m suffering.
They pulled out from their embrace, and shared a quick kiss on the lips. Ouch. That left a mark in my heart. I shouldn't be looking, but I can’t help it. They looked so happy with each other, I couldn't bear to ruin their relationship just because I secretly love Haruna.
Mari-chan looked to her side, her arms wrapping itself around Haruna's waist. She smiled warmly at me once she saw me sitting at a chair not too far away, and waved her hand towards me in a form of greeting. “Hey, Yuko! What’s up?”
I only smiled and waved back a little.
"You wanna come join us for lunch? My treat." Mari-chan said to me with her cheerful smile, as I saw Haruna laying her head onto her shoulder. They looked so happy and… Both of them are the closest people I have. I don’t want to ruin their relationship and our precious friendship just because of some stupid one-sided love.
"Nah, I’m good. Had a big breakfast, and I’m still full until now!" I exclaimed, rubbing my belly in satisfaction. Mari-chan laughed at my usual childish behavior.
"Alright then, suit yourself. We’ll bring some food for you afterwards, okay?"
I didn't want to reject her offer, so I nodded.
"Okay! Come on, Nyan Nyan let’s go!"
"Mhmm. Bye Yuko, see you soon!"
They walked off to God knows where, their hands holding one another as they started talking about stuff I don’t know. I heard Haruna laughed as they turned to another direction, until I couldn't see them anymore.
"Goodbye… Nyan Nyan…" I sighed, and hung my head down.
I hate myself for loving her too much. I hate myself for not moving on.
But I knew this one-sided love will never die. As long as she’s by my side, my love for her will continue to grow.
We were this close to fall in love.
But I knew, almost isn't enough for the both of us.
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what!?? NO NO NO!! this shouldn't end like this!! :banghead: :cry: :cry:
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Why so saaad??? :cry:
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Ouch. That's got to be really painful. Poor Yuko. :cry:
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aaaarghh sad ending :'(
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wait wait wait wait... :shocked
this isn't right.. :OMG:
WHY U HAVE TO MAKE MY YUUCHAN SUFFER .... AAAARRRGGGHHH........ :scolding:
you shouldn't do that to my KojiYuu.... :gyaaah:
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why is always Yuko who suffer!? WHY!? ;A;
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Hello there If I could remember I read you're Ice Cream (KojiYuu) in tumblr not long ago... XD
And reread it again here... I can't help but grin while reading it and get a massive blood loss for the 2nd time :mon blood:
Anywho it was REALLY REALLY great!! :bow:
Then.... I read Almost In Love (KojiYuu) :cry:
Why...WHY... did you do that?? :mon suspect:
It's ARRRGGGHHH!!! :banghead: seeing Yuko suffers...it just brakes my heart :cry:
But then again AWESOME Stories!! :thumbsup I shall read you're other fics as well... :grin:
I just saw WMatsui :deco: OMG hehehe...anyways can't wait for more :thumbup
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Very few amazing Kojiyuu fics these days... but maaannn~~~ this one breaks my heart even more!!! (T.T) my poor kojiyuu heart~~
please write more!! :)
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Anyone up for a sad oneshot? Well, here it is! :)
I don’t know why I have one person die in the end of my fanfictions, it’s just a weird habit. *nervous laugh* :sweatdrop:
Anyways, enjoy! The song that will be sung by the couple is Wherever You Are by ONE OK ROCK (live version from their JINSEI x KIMI tour).
Don’t forget to follow my Twitter! It would be really appreciated~
http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
———
Sing With Me (KojiYuu)
"Has the rain stopped yet?"
It never stopped from her point of view. Every day and every hour, God seemed to forbid people’s happiness and started to give them weeks of heavy rainfall. And during that time, people’s lives started to become dull and colorless while the rain continued to pour down from the heavens above.
She might have exagerrated the part of people’s lives being dull and colorless. Because, her life had been that way since the day she accompanied a certain person in the hospital. The latter now was laying on the white bed, half of her body covered by a thick layered blanket.
And just by looking at her, the other girl couldn’t look at her dearest friend in so much pain.
She looked up to see the view outside the window, revealing the sky at its usual dark color. The signs of raining was beginning to shiw itself as droplets of water drizzled down from the clouds.
The tall girl chuckled. “It seems so, Yuko. Gosh, it’s been two weeks of nonstop raining. One more week, and I’m gonna catch a major cold.”
She heard the shorter girl, who was laying on the bed with her mouth twisting to side to form a toothy smile, giggling from the taller girl’s sense of humor which never failed to amaze her.
"You can’t get sick that easily, Nyan Nyan." The ill girl crossed her arms around her chest as she sat up from her bed. "It takes much more time than just a week."
"Oh sure, so that explains that tumor of yours has been with you for three years for an unknown reason?"
Silence.
Kojima Haruna, nicknamed Nyan Nyan by Oshima Yuko, never wanted to snap in front of her dearest friend. Not in her current state. The poor girl looked vulnerable and harmless, just by one glance from a single person can turn him or her into a crying state.
The girl’s perverted jokes and remarks, the cheery hyperactive behavior, the warm and friendly smile. They were missed by all of the members. But they knew they couldn’t do anythinf about it.
Seeing the younger girl’s face fallen, Haruna immediately felt guilty. Because she didn’t intend to hurt her feelings.
"I-I’m sorry, Yuko. I-I didn’t mean to snap at you…" Haruna tried to apologize.
Though she was shocked when her friend only gave her a weak yet warm smile.
"I couldn’t get mad at you, Nyan Nyan."
Through all her years, Haruna never once saw Yuko angry. Not even a slightest hint of spark ingnited in the other girl’s eyes. She had always been the most brightest girl in the group, and she never doubt how many people admire her figure. Charming, sexy, bringing smiles to others. It was one of the reasons why Haruna admired her so much. But she never had time to say it to the young girl.
When she was about to ask why, Yuko suddenly groaned loudly in pain. She immediately laid back down on the bed, which seemed to not help relieve the intense waves of pain coursing through her back.
Haruna’s eyes widened in shock and panic. She immediately got near to the girl, grabbing hand in the process and felt it squeezed by the other girl’s hand.
"Yuko, what’s wrong? Where does it, where does it hurt? Oh God, Yuko. Tell me!"
Panic surges all of her body as she saw the painful tears streaming down Yuko’s eyes. The girl bit her lip, holding back the pain she was feeling on her back. And right now, she couldn’t even barely breath.
"My back… it hurts…" Yuko gasped loudly, and groaned much louder as she felt as if her back was being stabbed over and over again. She couldnlt breath properly. Her eyes were squeezed shut, sweat started to form on her forehead. Yuko felt as if her whole world started to cave in sooner or later, and felt her body starting to take its toll on her. "Nyan Nyan.."
"I’m here, Yuko. Just hold on, everything’s going to be just fine. Do you hear me? Just hold on…" Haruna said, her words flowing quickly from her mouth. Her other hand was desperately trying to find her phone in her bag. But it stopped once she heard Yuko’s weak voice.
"No…" Yuko weakly opened her eyes, her breathing wasnt’t as normal as before. Her eyes were watery as she kept trying to hold the intense pain surging through her back. "I think it’s already time…"
Haruna was taken aback by Yuko’s words. “Yuko, you have no idea what you’re talking about. If I don’t call your doctor soon, you’re going to die!”
"No!"
Haruna looked at Yuko in disbelief. It was the first time the young girl ever raised her voice in anger.
Tears started fill in Yuko’s eyes, the pain in her back not subsiding. Her hand clutched onto the bedsheet underneath her, feeling the watery substance in her eyes starting to stream down her cheeks.
"Just… stay with me… please…"
Haruna couldn’t control her inner pain in her chest. She doesn’t want to see her friend like this, in so much pain and sadness. She would do anything to get her old friend back into her regular condition. She would take her own life if it was nessecary. Just seeing the young girl healthy again meant the world to her.
But, what can she do? She can only do nothing but accept the terrible fate. And she knew every once in a while, people lost their loved ones. But to her, Yuko was another story waiting to be told.
So, she could only just walked back near the bed, and sat down onto the empty seat.
Haruna bit her lip as her hand slowly wrapped itself around Yuko’s, while the other hand started to caressed the sick girl’s hair. They both stared into each other’s eyes in silence. Not saying anything, but their body language speaks many things. They can communicate through each other’s minds, as if it was possible.
'I'm sorry, Yuko…'
'There's no reason to be sorry for, Haruna.'
It was the first time in over seven years that Yuko ever once called the other girl by her real name. And it brought more tears to the girl’s eyes.
They shared the silence they had together in peace. Not saying anything, not moving an inch. They looked deeply into one another’s eyes, seeing the emotions they were feeling. How could they possibly do this? Only they knew for sure.
Minuted has passed. Neither one of then dared to speak up.
Until-
"Do you remember our favorite song?" Yuko’s voice as weak as a whisper, but still very audible for Haruna to listen.
"Which one?" She sniffed, still not breaking eye contact. Her hand was softly caressing the young girl’s hand.
"I’ll go first… when you remember, sing with me." Yuko’s demanding tone was so familiar. So familiar to everyone in the group. But now, it wasn’t like before. It was like the tone of a child’s demand.
Haruna, not wanting to argue once more with her friend, only nodded in agreement. “Okay…”
The machine beside Yuko beeped to the beat of Yuko’s heartbeat. Right now, it was in a normal state.
"Kokoro kara aiseru hito…"
Haruna finally remembered. The song they sang together in every sleepover. The song they kept listening to in the past. She recoiled her memories into the lyrics, and continued the song from where Yuko left it off.
"Kokoro kara itoshii hito…"
"Kono boku no aino mannaka ni wa…"
Haruna felt a large lump in her throat as she tried to continue to sing. “Itsumo kimi ga iru kara…”
Yuko gave Haruna a weak but reassuring smile, continuing the final lyrics of the song.
"Wherever you are, I always make you smile.."
"Wherever you are, I’m always by your side.." Haruna clutched onto Yuko’s hand.
She heard the machine’s beeping slowly decreasing.
"Whatever you say, kimi wa omou kimochi…"
Haruna’s voice was nearly breaking up as she couldn’t hold her tears any longer. “I promise you forever right now…”
She felt the girp from Yuko’s hand lightened.
And the machine’s beeping suddenly turned flat. Like a small siren.
Haruna couldn’t keep it any longer. She laid her forehead onto Yuko’s hand, now cold and lifeless, and broke down into loud and painful sobs. Not moments ago, she witnessed her dying friends last words. Words of a song.
She gripped Yuko’s hand tighter while she continued to sob loudly in the room in loneliness, as if it was something so precious. Yuko was already a precious memory now.
And finally, she finished the song. With her voice breaking and echoing throughout the room.
"Wherever you are…"
And if that wasn’t enough for irony, the first rays of sunlight slowly emerged from the clouds and into the hospital room…
Shining its light towards the body of an unforgettable memory.
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so sad :(
feel so touch and sadness about kojiyuu :cry:
thank you arayamachdi-san O0
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looking for a kojiyuu fic to lighten my mood.... when i finally found it.... IT WAS A SAD KOJIYUU FIC :(((
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AGAAAAIIIINN????? :scolding:
this is the 2nd time read your KojiYuu OS..
AND BOTH OF THEM SO GOD DAMN SAAAAAD.... :fainted:
why u have to make them suffering????
hikkss... :depressed:
thanks btw...
that was great... :twothumbs
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aarrggh this fanfic make me wanna cry.... :mon waterworks:
why yuko must have to die.....
so sad...
this is a great fanfic...
thank you...
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Why??? It's just so saaad!!! :cry:
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:shocked :cry: :cry: Oww my poor yuuchaan... :smhid Kojiyuu is so beautifully sad :cry: :cry: tnks! :thumbup
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(http://24.media.tumblr.com/4139dc1e0246fbc7ee3aa02deb25ed2e/tumblr_mwcuyx4i751qjy22uo1_r1_1280.jpg)
I knew that my relationship has ups and downs, rights and wrongs. There were many happy and shitty times, and we still managed to keep this relationship intact. When we had a big fight for the first time, I decided to somewhere out of our apartment and spend the night in a certain person's house.
But when I woke up under the bed sheets naked with the other person beside me... I knew I fucked up.
This is a large version of the poster. I'll try to minimize it once I post the fanfic up~
Be sure to follow me on Tumblr and Twitter to get updates! ;)
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I'm taking requests now! This fic is requested by sherin48 from Tumblr.
I hope you guys like this! And the song that will be played is Scene One - James Dean and Audrey Hepburn by Sleeping with Sirens.
Send me a request here or through my Tumblr. Don't forget to follow me on Twitter as well!
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Playing the Guitar (WMatsui)
"Okay everyone, let’s take a break!"
With Christmas in just a month away, the group that originated from Akihabara has been invited to be special guest stars to perform onstage for a local television show in Tokyo. They gladly accepted the request, and they had finally call it a break after a long dance practice.
Beeds of sweat formed on the forehead of a certain member, she wiped her forehead with the back of her hand and let out an exhausting sigh. She put her other hand on her hip, and she started to look at the other members. They looked exhausted as well, but not exhausted like the one and only Matsui Rena.
She forgot to eat her breakfast today. And she hasn’t regretted until now.
She remembered bringing some food from the convenient store before heading to practice, so she probably needs to go to the dressing room. And so she did.
After greeting ‘good afternoon’ to some staffs walking down the same hallway as her, she finally reached the dressing room. Her stonach had been growling along the way, so she can’t wait to get some food in her. And no, not in that kind of way.
But before she could turn the knob of the door in front of her, her ears perked up.
She can faintly hear the sound of someone strumming a guitar. And also a voice. A sweet, soft singing voice…
'Who's playing the guitar all alone in the dressing room?' Rens thought to herself, and knewing that she won't get her answer until she went in the room, she slowly turned the knob of the door and peeked through the door a little to see who it was.
"Hello…?"
She was suprised when she saw who it was.
"Oh. Hey, Rena-chan."
The young, sixteen year old girl with short curly hair that reached her shoulders and a dimpled that can charm other members sat comfortably on one of the chairs available in the room. In her hand, an acoustic guitar perfectly set in her lap for support. A sticker that read ‘Caroline’ was sticked in one side of the guitar, which made the older girl remembered the music video of AKB’s current latest single.
In her eyes, Jurina looked like a perfessional guitarist. And maybe she was.
Rena walked in the room, closing the door in the process and walked towards the sitting Matsui girl. The other girl started strum the chords of the guitar delicately and calmly, as if she has been doing this for yeard. It sparked the curiosity of the older girl, so that’s why she asked when she pulled out a chair and sat in front of Jurina.
"Was it you playing the guitar a while ago?" Rena inquired, as she looked the younger girl still busy with the guitar in her hand.
"Mhmm." Jurina said, showing off her dimpled smile. "A fan gave it to me this morning, but she couldn’t come in so the staff helped her send her gift to me." She looked at Rena with eyes that beamed like a little child. "It’s cool, isn’t it?"
"Yeah, it is…" Rena replied with a smile, but slowly frowned as she looked at the young girl strumming happily with her instrument in front of her. It has been a while since they talked, almost too long. And she felt guilty about it, because she was the one that treated the other girl like a little sister years ago. Now, time has changed and they barely exchanged anything.
That’s why she wanted to make it right.
"Can you play something for me?"
Jurina looked up from her guitar, looking at Rena with a slight shocked expression. But she smiled warmly and shrugged afterwards.
She adjusted her seat and also her guitar on her lap so she was able to play comfortably. And once she did, she cleared her throat before strumming the strings to see if it’s in the correct pitch.
When she finally finished checking, she started strumming. And later, the angelic voice was heard again by the older girl.
"Stay for the night
If you want to, I can show you
What my dreams are made of
As I’m dreaming of your face
I’ve been away for a long time
Such a long time
And I missed you there
I can’t imagine being anywhere else
I can’t imagine being anywhere else but here…”
Rena never knew that Jurina’s ability in the English language was as good as she thought it would be. And how her high pitched voice fit perfectly for the song. It was something unexpected, something worth remembering for years to come.
She continued to listen to Jurina’s singing. It felt like she was being lulled to sleep.
"How the hell did you ever picked me
Honestly, ‘cause I could sing you a song
But I don’t think words can express your beauty…
Sing into me
How the hell did we end up like this
You bring out the beast in me
I fell in love from the moment we kissed
Since then, we’ve been history…”
That nearly pierced Rena’s heart. But she knew it was breaking every little bit.
Nostalgia crept into her mind, and flashbacks started to go back and forth in her head as it played different kinds of memories from the past. The times where they laughed together, shared stories together, everything they did just the two of them. She remembered how Jurina stole her first kiss by giving a sneaky peck on the lips, and that made Rena crazy.
She was embarrassed, but she also liked it for some reason.
"They say that love is forever
Your forever is all that I need
Please stay, as long as you need
Can’t promise that things won’t be broken
But I swear that I will never leave
Please stay forever with me…”
With a couple of strums, Jurina finally ended the song.
Jurina set aside the guitar gently, and waited anxiously for the older girl’s comment. “So how was it? I mean, I just started learning the guitar for a month, so it’s really not that good- wait, why are you crying?”
Rena sniffed as she wiped the silent tears from her eyes. She was embarrassed of herself for crying in front of her friend. Close friend, to be exact. Hiding her shame, she lowered her head with her hands slightly trembling.
But then, she felt a pair of warm hands slowly holding hers. She looked up, finding a worried Jurina looking at her in the eye.
"Rena-chan, what’s wrong?"
The flood gates has opened. And Rena couldn’t hold it any longer.
"I miss you calling me by that name." And in an instant, she pulled the younger girl into a tight embrace. Sobbing loudly onto her shoulder.
Jurina was caught off guard for a couple of seconds, but slowly her arms wrapped themselves around the older girl’s body. She felt warm tears soaking her shirt as Rena continued to sob loudly onto her shoulder with so much pain.
Jurina isn’t the comforting type, but when it comes to the people she loved, she will do anything to calm them down. Especially if it’s regarding Rena.
"Ssshh… it’s okay. It’s not your fault, nor mine’s either…"
"I’m sorry… I’m sorry…" Rena continued to repeat this as she sobbed even louder.
Jurina kissed the top of Rena’s forehead and rubbed her back softly.
"It’s okay, Rena-chan. We’re okay."
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cute couple
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very cute couple....
thanks
^_^
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I wanted to try something new, and since I haven’t written a MaYuki fic yet, I might as well do that!
A tribute (sort of) for the song by A Rocket to the Moon. Follow me on Twitter!
http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
~~~
"When love hurts, you are genuinely in love. If it doesn’t, think about it again."
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Like We Used To (MaYuki)
The moon looked really beautiful.
I don’t want to sound cheesy or somewhat lonely, but when I look closely at the moon in the sky when the cold December embraces me tonight, it usually never shined so bright before. There were no signs of clouds, just the stars and the moon themselves. I rested my chin against my palm, amazed by the beauty of the night.
At least they got each other. They don’t have to feel so lonely up there.
In the meanwhile, I had nothing to do nor no one to be with. That’s why I thought it was a good idea to take a walk around the park while wearing my new red scarf I bought in Harujuku. I liked it, it feels comfortably warm around my neck, shielding me from the cold.
But it still doesn’t feel homey. Her warmth couldn’t be compared by others.
I inhaled the frostbiting air, the freezing oxygen filled my lungs and I exhaled with a trail of fog leaving my mouth. Closing my eyes, I tried to rest my mind and enjoy the peacefulness of tonight’s atmosphere.
But every time I closed them, the image of her face kept coming to my mind. And left me with a heartache.
I sighed. I guess I was lying when I told people that I’ve moved on. Because I couldn’t get her off my freaking head.
I’m just glad that she’s with someone else. She deserved someone better than me. Her love… her love for me was just a mistake, I guess. But I’m glad it was if it’s true. She could move on faster and find someone else who treats her better than I did.
I sighed.
I don’t think I’m able to move on just yet. These memories, they kept hitting rewind in my head. Never wanting to stop laughing at me, mocking me that I was such an idiot back then. They kept bothering me. Until I decided to change. Not for her, but for myself and people around me.
I was known as the Ice Queen due to my cold glares and personality. Now, they’re still surprised whenever I laugh or give them a warm smile. Well, it’s a change they got to get used to.
I knew it was not going to get her back. I mean like I said, it wasn’t for her.
But… I still felt lonely when she just ignores me like a stranger. And ran off to her new and better lover.
I don’t mind them being together, like I said I’m happy for her to find someone that would always make her smile and laugh. But, the feeling of loneliness never left me even if I was with my friends or my mother.
How we always chatted online, I missed that too. I think she deleted our conversation and spend much of her time chatting with her girlfriend. I don’t know if it’s true, but maybe she did.
How we always share the bed together. The warmth of her skin, her sweet lullabies soothing me, her lips gently pressing against my cheek or forehead. I loved her warmth. Now, I sleep with only a pillow. Sometimes, I wake up with teary eyes while hugging tightly to my pillow.
Yeah. I’m not able to move on just yet. I’m giving time some time to get me ready and prepared.
And I should really dropped the habit of daydreaming or just staring into nothingness. Because it has been getting really annoying.
"I wish things are simple now…" I whispered softly into the night.
"I thought things are going well for you, Mayuyu."
I opened my eyes in shock, and jerked my head to the side as I heard another person’s voice beside me. I thought I was sure there was no one walking around the park at this time. But I guess time hasn’t give me mercy yet.
Because it was her.
She looked beautiful, like always. Every time I see her, she’s beautiful. Her light brown sweater and dark brown jeans fitted her appearance so well this evening. Her smile, her dazzling smile I missed the most. She’s smiling at me, almost sadly if I’m not mistaken. The wind blew us slightly, and I saw some of her hair blowing a little. She pulled them to the back of her ear, whilst doing so, her smile turned much warmer and friendlier.
Goddammit. I missed her so much.
"Hey." She said a smile hello at me after how many months of not talking to each other.
"H-Hi." I forced a smile back, but it felt completely fake. I adjusted the position of my scarf, and turned my body towards her. "I didn’t know I could meet you here."
"Neither do I. I was just walking around, feeling slight lonely in my apartment. So I decided to go to the park…" She trailed off when she realized what she was about to say. I smiled, and finished off her sentence.
"The park where we used to go together." My voice cracked at the last sentence. Because I just realized how I missed the past so much. I wanted to cry, but not right now. Not in front of Yuki.
"Yeah. You seem to remember our past, huh Mayuyu?" Yuki giggled, which somehow lightened the atmosphere around.
"You could say that. Who couldn’t forget the time where you fell into the pond when we were playing tag?" I smirked, trying to embarrassed her with our memory.
She blushed in embarrassment. “Mou, don’t remind me of that. It was a bad day for me, you know.”
"Wait a moment, you forgot about the time when you slipped on top of a-"
"Mayuyu!"
We both laughed. Laughed for the good old days. We laughed like the old us, where we never care about the weird glanced from people. We laughed like the times of darkness and the times of light. We laughed just like two people who shared a good relationship together.
Did share, from our perspective.
The laughter died down a while ago, and we were accompanied by comfortable silence. The cold breeze whistled around the park, the distant noises from the streets. I missed moments like these. They were rare, and when I do get the chance, I always treasure them like a special gift. Maybe it was special. But not for her. Maybe.
"Do you missed us?" Yuki brought up a question. A question I tried to avoid. And right now, I felt as if my heart broke into two.
And without even thinking, I pulled her into a tight hug.
By this time, I really don’t want to let her go. Because if I do, I lose her. Like all those memories ago.
She didn’t respond at first, but I felt her arms slowly wrapping themselves around my tiny body. Shielding against the cold and reality, as we stood there locked in each other’s arms. It has been awhile since I last hugged her.
I don’t want to let go. I don’t want to let go. I don’t let you go, Yukirin. Don’t leave me like this.
"I take that as a yes, then."
I didn’t respond, and with that, she tightened the embrace. Which definitely calm me down.
Yukirin. You don’t know how much I miss you. How I miss us.
But I don’t mind if you love someone else. At least you’re happy with them, and they treat you better than I did.
I hope, and I really do, that they will do the precious thing like I used to.
I hope you will do those things with that someone. Like we used to.
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It's beautiful :farofflook: but it left me heartbroken knowing Mayuki didn't go back as lovers.
Thanks for the OS. :kneelbow:
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OUCH! :doh:
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Omg why the story is so sad for Mayuki
Please update more
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I hope everyone's heart is strong, because here comes another angst-y sad oneshot! :D
I don't know why, but lately my songs have been about relationships gone wrong, heartbreaks, etc. Maybe I am beginning to feel like this... I don't know, but it helps my motivation! :)
Enjoy! And follow me on Twitter (links are down below)! :heart:
Happy 8th Anniversary, AKB48. You really deserve the attention and success over the years :)
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Sorry (KojiYuu)
"Hey, Nyan Nyan. It's been awhile, isn't it? I think it's about six months since I last saw and hear from you. How are things going on in your life? Has your modelling career improved? I hope it does, because you're a great model."
Yuko felt a large lump in her throat. As if she was holding back the tears that were threatening to come.
"I miss you, Nyan Nyan. I really do. Please don't ignore me anymore. I just wanted to hear your voice again."
Yuko clenched the phone tightly in her hand.
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry."
Beep.
It wasn't enough.
It wasn't enough for Yuko that she could only apologized through voice mails and texts. Even though she had put every emotion into every word she said or typed, she still doesn't feel relieved. As if there was something in her chest that she had been locking up all this time. She kept trying to let all of the feelings go, but she couldn't.
She needed to say her. She needed to see Haruna.
After all a lot of thinking and hesitation, she decided that she will go up to Haruna's apartment tonight, and speak with her. Face to face. She needed to say something she had been trying to say after the past six months of loneliness. An apology.
'Why didn't I brought a scarf? It's freezing outside.'
Yuko regretted not bringing her scarf along the journey right after she stepped out of her apartment building and into the cold winter streets of Tokyo. She shivered, letting out a shaky breath leaving a trail of smoke as she exhaled. She shoved both of her arms under the pockets of her thick black jacket. Even her beanie hat isn't helping her giving the warmth she needed.
She remembered bringing a note along with her. She pulled out her right hand from her pocket, looking at the piece of folded paper in hand. She brought it with her just in case things didn't go as she planned.
Yuko smiled bravely. This was now or never.
-
It was geographically convenient that the distance between Yuko's and Haruna's apartment isn't too far away. Yes, she needed to cross the streets a couple of times but it was all worth Yuko's time.
And after going inside the apartment building, escaping the freezing cold and using the elevator which helped her get up to the 8th floor, she had finally reached Haruna's apartment.
Now all she needed to do was knock.
Yuko sighed nervously, her head looked down at the piece of paper in her hand which was concealed in a white envelope. Looking up at the door in front of her that separated the outside world and the world inside Haruna's apartment, she wondered if she was doing the right thing. But courage found its way again towards the squirrel-like girl. And her hand was close to knocking the door.
'If things didn't go as planned, I still have my note.'
Knock. Knock. Knock.
"Wait a minute!"
She heard faint footsteps coming from the inside, and heard the door unlocking twice. And when the person's face popped up from the door, it left the short girl with a warm feeling of relief and happiness
"Yuko?" Haruna stated in disbelief.
In Yuko's eyes, Haruna became even more beautiful. Her hair was still the brown colored hair Yuko last saw and remembered, but had a few streaks of yellow along the side. Her eyes glimmered with disbelief, still staring at the short girl in front of her apartment door. The minor makeup Haruna used made a natural look of her beauty, making Yuko amazed by how natural the tall girl's beauty was. In that very moment, Yuko felt herself falling in love with Haruna even more.
Showing off a dimpled yet happy smile, she looked at Haruna with so much love and hope. "It's been awhile, Nyan Nyan."
Haruna shook her head when she noticed how long she had been staring at the short girl. She gave a cold look towards Yuko, regaining her composure.
"What do you want?"
Yuko's smile faltered when she recognized the icy tone in Haruna's voice. Both of her feet shuffled nervously in the ground as she couldn't keep on looking at Haruna since the tall girl was still giving her a cold, disgusted look.
"Nyan Nyan, I wanted to tell you something..."
Haruna narrowed her eyes. "There's nothing you're going to tell me. And that's final." She started to close the door, but was blocked when Yuko's foot was caught in the way.
"Nyan Nyan, please... Just give me a chance to explain-"
"I already gave you a chance. You fucked it up last time. Now, let go or I'll force to call the police for intrusion in a stranger's apartment." Haruna's icy tone turned much colder and sinister, making Yuko stared at her in disbelief.
"Strangers..."
But her question was left unanswered as Haruna already slammed the door in front of her face.
Yuko looked down, her note still on her hand. Her lips trembled as she felt another round of tears threatening to burst at any moment. She clenched her hand into fist which still had the concealed note. She sniffed, quickly wiping the tears in her eyes so no one could see them. But she was already on the verge to broke down.
She will. In her lonely apartment.
She paused for a moment when she walk away from Haruna's apartment. She hesitated for a moment, but decided to slip in the note through the bottom of the door. Bending down, she easily slipped in the note into the inside of her apartment. Getting up, she took one quick glance at the door before walking in the other direction.
'God. This stupid feeling in my chest is literally going to kill me. And the freezing cold too.'
She shoved both of her arms into the pockets of her thick black jacket, her gaze cast down towards the concrete ground below. She kept walking, unsure of where to go afterwards. She wanted to go back to her apartment, but she also wanted to get all the messed up shit that had been happening for the past six months out of her head. She had enough. She wanted everything to go back to normal.
She didn't recognized the street light for passing the street was still red.
But she recognized a certain voice calling out her name from behind.
"Yuko!"
Yuko stopped in the middle of the road, and quickly turned around. Disbelief covered her eyes when she saw Haruna running after her from the other side of the street.
"Nyan Nyan..."
She saw Haruna's head looking at her left, eyes widening for a reason Yuko didn't know.
"Yuko, look out!"
In reflex, the squirrel girl jerked her head to the right.
All she saw was a loud horn and a blinding light.
And then, total darkness.
-
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
"She's going to be fine, Haruna."
She doesn't know that.
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
"Please, let's just go home. Let the doctors take charge."
I didn't respond. I didn't want to. My eyes was trained on her. Laying on the cold, hospital bed.
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
"Haruna, you really need some rest-"
"Takamina. Just shut up," My voice cracked. "If you don't want to be here, then leave. Now."
I could see her flinching from my cold tone. But she sighed, almost as if she gave up.
"Alright then. See you tomorrow, Haruna." Takamina spoke softly, then she exited the room. Leaving me with her, all alone. Just the two of us.
I don't know if there will be a tomorrow, Takamina. My tomorrow and forever was always with her.
If she doesn't woke up...
If she doesn't...
I didn't hold it in anymore. I sobbed, feeling all my emotions in every sob. Pain, loneliness, regret, guilt, and hopelessness.
Her words on the note kept replaying in my mind. But it kept making me cry every time I read or just simply think about it...
Dear Nyan Nyan,
I see you around everyday. I noticed that you smile even brighter than I do. I'm happy for you.
All I wanted to say is... I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for the things I've done, and to the things I said. I never wanted to lose you. A day passes by of me suffering from my loneliness. Only you could help me feel whole again.
I've been thinking about everything. About the questions left unanswered, about my love. About you.
I just hope you know that you have never left my head.
And if I ever let you down...
I'm sorry.
-
Did Yuko die? :(
What's up today? It's AKB's 8th anniversary but 3 writers wrote something sad. :cry:
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why so sad ???!
But thx for this kojiyuu fic
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And here comes the angsty kojiyuu (۳º̩̩́___º̩̩̀)۳
Soooo sad..... Yuko..nyannyan..
Is it will just be oneshot? No second part? Ah you wrote 'angsty oneshot' clearly up there, but gah dunno I kinda want some happy ending hhahaha what am I blabbering about?
Thankyou anyway arya-san :D
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So many to update, so little time... But I still can update this fanfic!
I apologize if it took longer than I thought it would, but I'll try to update faster since the holidays are coming. :)
Enjoy the second part slash chapter, and follow me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
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This Is What It Feels Like: Part 2
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/ed3636ae12b9624153a7893f74fd4bb4/tumblr_mtve6vm6en1qjy22uo1_500.jpg)
It was a nice walk. Nicer than any other days, to be honest.
It wasn't long walk towards my house, but if you counted someone along to walk with, then the time to get there will be a little bit longer than usual. In most days, I often walk fast so I could get back home and seclude myself in my room for hours, only going out whenever it's dinner time, or just going to the bathroom which was an inconvenience since I wanted to have a bathroom inside of my bedroom. But I couldn't possibly be that rich to build a bathroom with my own money.
The atmosphere was a lot more calmer than it was like in any other day. I nearly forgot it was autumn, and was lucky enough to wear my warm, pink jacket that my mom bought me during the summer. I told her to buy something dark for this season, but instead she bought me a pink one. I never liked the color, particularly because I hated bright colors. But I've gotten used to it, so it isn't a big deal anymore.
I felt a gentle breeze whistled around the somewhat quiet streets, the cold wind softly blowing onto my face. Shoving my hands into the pockets of my jacket, I silently glanced at the girl next to me. Oddly enough, she had been silent since our depart at school. Maybe she was just as socially awkward as I was, or maybe she was cold from the wind.
I decided to break the silence. After all, it was weird enough for Jurina to not talk normally like a typical young girl would. I cleared my throat, mainly because it has been itchy lately.
"So, uh, Jurina."
She jerked her head instantly when I, out of nowhere, called out her name, looking as if she just got out of her trance. I guess she was thinking of something so deep, that it blocked out the reality around her.
"Ah, Mayu-san!" Jurina said, quite surprised. "Um, what's wrong?"
It looked she was cold out of her skin, because I could see her lips slight trembling from the freezing air and the fact that she didn't brought her sweater or jacket made the problem even worse. I started to grow concern for her and nearly offered to give her my jacket, but then again I would get cold and she won't, so it was a mixed battle between wanting and not wanting.
"I'm just curious," I said. "Why did you moved to my school? Well, not my school, the school I go to, but you get the point."
Jurina nodded her head, her glanced turned down to the ground as she continued to walk with me side by side. The background noises of other students laughing and talking loud at each other on the other side of the street, the constant rings of bicycles that were also ridden by students as they raced down the slightly steep road made the atmosphere a lot serene.
"It's a long story. But to keep it short, my mom insisted me to move to a new house here and study at a nearby school. I really wanted to stay in Nagoya..." She trailed off, a moment of silence then she spoke up again. "I just missed someone dear to me back in my old school, that's all."
I couldn't help but felt sorry for her. I mean, I never have anyone to miss except one person nor no one that missed me. But the hollow feeling of losing someone you missed, when they're far from your reach, that I felt at times. When there's someone who means dearly to you, you couldn't let them go as easy as letting go a kite
Maybe that's why I always missed my dad. He's too far out of my reach. I couldn't reach him like the way I used to reach into his warm arms. I sighed. Damn nostalgia. It always came back to me.
I looked down at the ground, my old slightly worn out sneakers was the only thing interesting besides the conversation. Except, Jurina was being silent again.
An opportunity arise. Inhaling a deep breath, and let the words flow.
"The sakura theory."
I glanced up at Jurina, just in time for her to look at me with a look of confusion. "What do you mean?"
I lightly kicked a small pebble in my way, the small object kept tumbling down the steep road. I saw it disappear, and revert my attention back to the conversation at hand.
"A couple of months ago, I made up a theory when I was sitting underneath the sakura tree during PE. Don't ask why I'm not joining the class." When I saw Jurina nodding in agreement, I continued to explain my made up theory. "Anyways, there I was sitting underneath the beautiful, God-given tree. It was the time where the petals will randomly fall to different areas, and it didn't caught my attention until I glanced up."
I motioned my hand, trying my best to describe my situation. "There was this one petal, I didn't know why it caught my attention but it did. It was slowly falling down towards me. My inner child erupted inside me, and I tried to capture it with my hand," I chuckled lightly as I remembered how childish I was back then. "I kept waiting and waiting for it to fall down and land on my hand. I didn't know why I was so curious, though."
"But as it was about to reach my hand, the wind blew it away and I was left there with my hands open, my expectations didn't came true." I shoved my hand into the pocket of my jacket, as I finished describing the scene. "Then the theory came up in my mind. When something means dearly to you, you can't leave it with ease. When they leave, you're left with this empty feeling inside you. The only way to heal is to get up and reach for that special something. Even if it's just an object or a person."
For the first time in my life, that was the longest I've ever talked.
I didn't know who or what boosted my confidence, but being with Jurina, this strange girl I coincidentally met in class, sort of bring a calm ambiance between the two of us. Maybe it wasn't wrong for me to accept her offer to walk home with me, even it was an odd request. Maybe it was a sign that maybe, this girl could help me with myself. And maybe, just maybe, I should thank Mariko for letting her seat with me in class.
And out of all days, weeks or months, this was the most calmest conversation I've ever had with someone.
I glanced up at Jurina, the explanation felt too long but at least I poured everything that I stored in my chest. "Do you get the point?"
She had this serious expression that was really odd yet it suited her appearance. Much more mature looking, and a lot less girly. Not that I mind, though. She nodded after a couple of seconds.
"So, did you get the small petal after that?"
I shook my head. "No, I was too lazy to stand up and walk, plus I'm short so that's an inconvenience as well."
She laughed at my sentence, even thought it wasn't entirely supposed to be funny. I guess the ugly truth made it humorous.
"You really are something, Mayu-san. Besides your cold exterior, no offense."
I smirked. "There's a lot more where that came from, Jurina. I'm not as cold as everybody think I am."
We both shared a good laugh. And we both needed that small sense of relief.
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No sad or tragic or angst-y endings this time. Since this will be a Christmas oneshot (or two), the ending will be a good one. Maybe a lot of drama in it, but the ending remains a good ending :)
I hope you enjoy this special oneshot or two, and don’t forget to follow me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
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Dear Christmas (1 of 2)
"No offense Yuko, but you look a lot more shittier than yesterday."
I can tell she was just being sarcastic due to the tense atmosphere around me, but I couldn’t blame her. I had been looking much worse than usual, maybe the term ‘shittier’ suits it best. The feeling of something was missing never left my chest for a few days now, and it had been distracting me in almost every activity I attend. Preferably in dance practice.
While everyone was too busy correcting their moves whilst checking on others to see if they were doing the same as everyone else, I was busy thinking of how miserable I am and the fact that she had been ignoring me before and after the separation, isn’t helping me with the ‘moving on’ phase.
I sighed, and rubbed my eyes in both exhaustion and frustration. “I know you’re trying to cheer me up Miichan, but could you cut your stupid sarcasm for just a day? The last thing I need is to feel more and more miserable.”
Miichan was obviously offended by my cold attitude, though I wasn’t sure if she was pretending to be offended or not. All I knew was I wasn’t in the mood to joke around. My chest was feeling heavy as always, even though there wasn’t a thing that can make my chest feel heavy.
"Sorry, I didn’t know your mood hasn’t lighten yet," Miichan stated the obvious as I nearly rolled my eyes in annoyance. I saw her pondered over something, and then smiling afterwards. "Is it okay if I kiss you? Just so that you could feel better?"
I thought it wouldn’t hurt to try since Miichan always have the sweetest kisses even from her boyish appearance with that short hair of hers, so I gave her a small sad smile and nodded my head lightly. Miichan seemed excited, because she quickly scooted much closer to me and gave me a long yet soft kiss on the cheek. Making me blush a little.
"There, how about now?" She asked me with her eyes that were so innocent, I didn’t even know she could be this cute and less sarcastic. I smiled a little, ruffling her hair a little roughly.
"Thanks. That helped me a little," I smirked, my finger started to brush the end of Miichan’s lips. "But next time, kiss me on the lips. Okay?"
Now it was her turn to blush in embarrassment. See, the tip to embarrass her was throwing back what she did to you and say something out of her league. She might be surprised at your words, which was a fun sight to see when she’s being embarrassed.
I chuckled slightly, and patted her back gently. “You should go back to practice. The kenkyuusei’s might be looking for you right now.”
Miichan frowned, looking as if she doesn’t want to go just yet. But duty calls, and the importance of dance practice was one of things she had to force down her throat in order to stay in AKB. She stood up, gives me a warm smile and told me that we’ll talk again later, which I nodded in agreement. Then, she walked out of the room.
I sighed, my eyes looking down on my shoes. I’m back to feeling lonely again, even though there were members everywhere around the room.
Out of nowhere, I get the sense that someone was watching me from afar. I looked up, and to my surprise, my eyes instantly caught onto Haruna. But just as our eyes met, she looked away and started to find someone else to talk to.
It was weird. Everything was weird. And all I wanted is the weirdness to end.
-
"Jurina!"
"Ah, Kojima-san! What is it?" I saw one of the aces of SKE walking towards the person whom called her over.
"Let’s take dinner together! And afterwards, we could take a picture for my Instagram," Haruna asked, her eyes looking at the young girl with high expectations.
"I want to, but I promised Rena-chan to go with her somewhere. Maybe another time, Kojima-san," Jurina said in disappointment. Secretly, I wished that Jurina won’t accept her offer. But as long as I knew Haruna, she won’t give ‘no’ as an asnwer.
"Oh come on, please…" Haruna pouted, her hands grabbing the younger girl’s arm. And another thing I knew about her, was her pouting. A lot of people could not handle her adorable pout. Except people like Mayu, who never showed any emotions or just isn’t that gullible.
Jurina sighed in defeat, or I guess she did, and smiled while nodding her head in agreement. “Okay, Kojima-san, I’ll go.”
I imagined Haruna doing a weird victory dance afterwards, even though all she did was smiled widely and wrapped her arm around Jurina’s waist as they started to walk in another direction, not even a single glance towards me, the witness. By now, I would be lying if I wasn’t hurt, or jealous, or maybe a combination of both.
It was like a nagging feeling in my chest. Something that slowly brings my mood down into a level where I just want to hide from everything and cry. As if there wasn’t anyone in the world that can help me with this pain. And I need their help. I need someone’s help to get me out of this pool of despair.
Why would you do this to me, Nyan Nyan? Did your ‘I love you’s mean anything at all? Did my kisses and embraces give you any warmth at all? Was my love not worth it?
I have questions that are needed to be answered. I want her to answer them.
"Yuko-chan!"
Looking up slowly from the floor underneath my feet, my eyes caught upon my oshiri sister slash closest friend. I looked at her in confusion, because normally she would’ve gone home by now with Yukirin to accompany her. But I didn’t hesitate to smile back at her when she flash me hers.
Once she sat sat beside me after she grabbed the nearest chair since there were numerous of them here in the dressing room, she looked at me with worry. Something that was new from the cyborg girl. “Why haven’t you gone home yet?”
I frowned, unconciously shrugging my shoulders. “I don’t know.”
Mayu looked at me with a serious expression, her body posture towards me with her hand laying on top of mine. “You don’t know, or you know but you can’t explain it to me?”
There was this bubbly emotion trying to erupt from my chest, which I knew it was frustration. I gripped my head, trying to keep myself from screaming and instead, groaning. Thank fucking God no one was in the room here with us.
"I don’t know what the hell’s wrong with me. Every day, whenever I wake up in the morning, I feel all the happiness and motivation inside me is being suck out of my body. Every time I come to practice, I always feel like I’m being some kind of outcast and just want to hide from everybody. And every goddamn time I come back home, I kept imprisoning myself in my room, crying myself to sleep while I keep hearing these fucking whispers in the walls. It’s like as if the God Almighty doesn’t want me to fucking live anymore!"
I stood up from my seat, the anger inside of me was at its peak as I looked at every object around the room. Then my foot unconsciously started to kick one of the chairs, my eyes staring at the four-legged object as it made a loud impact on the wall.
I breathed heavily then before, my heart beating faster like a freight train. My hands balled into a fist, feeling the blood in my veins escalate. The anger inside subsided. The room fell silent, only my heavy breathing was the only sound left.
As I felt Mayu wrapping her arms around my waist, feeling the warmth of her body against mine, I loose my balance and slowly started to sunk onto the floor. The heavy feeling was still in my chest, trying to get out.
But once I couldn’t hold my tears any longer, I felt the weight drifting away.
I sobbed like I never sob before. My cries echoed throughout the room, making it sound a lot more painful to hear for outsiders. But now, I didn’t care anymore. It’s too much for me to handle. I need to break down someday. After weeks that felt like a living hell, it’s relieving to just cry and cry as loud as you can. At least, I have someone by my side. If I was alone, I could’ve done much worse things.
"I missed her, Mayu. I missed her so much," I said in betweeb sobs. "Now she’s been treating me like shit…"
I felt Mayu’s embrace tightened. She hasn’t a word until now.
"I know, Yuko. Please hold on a little while longer, okay? Don’t… don’t do anything crazy, please…"
Her voice was innocent and soft, something that I had never heard and seen before from my friend. But it made feel reassured a bit, thought I couldn’t reply her since I was to busy crying my eyes out. My warm tears started to fall onto the cold floor.
In this moment, I only have Mayu to help me.
Someone to help me from having further thoughts of ending my own goddamn life.
-
It was December 24th.
Everyone was busy being all excited and cheery as they buy gifts for their friends, familyy and loved ones while I was busy feeling miserable and grumpy as I waited for my order in one of the coffee shops in Akihabara. Like any lonely person would do in Christmas Eve. Well, many hours before that time.
Staying at home with no heating system when the temperature’s below 10 degrees celcius wasn’t a good idea, so I decided to go out and look for someplace that gives free warm air conditioning. That’s how I ended up in this cafe that was filled by not too many people but still has a decent heating system and a cozy atmosphere for a freezing winter.
Plus, the waitresses’ looked very pretty. And so nice as well. I wished I could take one of them home with me.
"Here’s your hot cafe latte, Oshima-san."
I looked at the desk, and saw one of the waitress putting on the finishing touches on my drink which was the foamy cream on top. I think it was called whipcream, but I might be wrong so I’ll call it ‘foamy cream’ for now on.
Smiling warmly at the kind girl, whose name was ‘Sashihito Tamika’ from the nametag on her uniform, I gently grabbed the drink in my hand. “Thank you.”
As I was about to leave the counter, I heard the girl behind me calling my name. “Ano,Oshima-san.”
I turned around, looking at her questionably. “Yes. Is there something wrong?”
"A-ano…" She stuttered nervously. "May I have your autograph? I’m a big fan of you in AKB, and I never got to attend any handshake events lately since I’ve been so busy and money is tight this year so…"
I giggled, smiling warmly at her. “Of course you can. Um, do you have a napkin?” She nodded her head, looking at a shelf full of utensils and giving me a napkin after she found it. I asked her for a pen, which she gladly gave it to me, and I wrote a small autograph.
"Thank you for making the drink! Stay cute~ ^^ - Yuko."
I gave it to her, and when she read the small message on the napkin, her cheeks instantly turned red. She looked fairly cute, to be honest. I giggled at her reaction, forgetting that I have my phone in my pocket.
"Thank you so much, Oshima-san! I will treasure this for the rest of my life!" Tamika said excitedly, squealing in delight.
"You’re welcome. I hope I’ll see you again, Tami-chan," I said, winking at her playfully before I went and go to find an empty seat near the window. But I knew that she would be blushing again without even looking.
It wasn’t hard to find a seat bear the window, since the cafe isn’t full. As I found a perfect spot for me to sit, I plopped myself down onto the soft red chair and sighed. I found a good spot to sit, too.
The view from the outside was better than I expected. I got a view from the people walking by, business man and woman alike, workers, employees, even teenagers with their group of friends laughing and having a great time with each other. Most of them wear thick clothes due to the cold, though some were bearable and are used to the freezing air of December. It was a busy day for people in Tokyo. Especially since tomorrow’s the holiday all people have been waiting for.
It was nice that Takamina told Aki-P to have a day off for most of the members in AKB, and probably SKE and NMB as well. We were all very exhausted from the current dance practice we have for an upcoming Christmas performance the next day. So, we didn’t hesitate to enjoy and relax for a day of no stress and work.
I’m beggining to feel relaxed myself. I sipped my hot cafe latte, and moaning softly at how good it was. I might come here everyday for this winter, and maybe the next as well.
I looked up from my seat, looking around the cafe which was half full from the ongoing customers that were walking in every now and then.
Until my eyes laid upon one person who was ordering a drink from the counter up front. My eyes widened. I wasn’t looking at the wrong person, I’m not blurry eyed. It’s her. No way…
No fucking way…
The Gods are not yet done seeing me suffer.
"Haruna?"
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What happened and will happen to Kojiyuu? :? You have to update this soon. :P
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The squirrel bursted tears too much, I'm dying here T~T
But glad to know that it will be a happy ending for kojiyuu >w<
Thankyou arya-san! Maybe you'll post the 2nd part tomorrow? Lol just guessing no pressure XD XD XD
Wanna know their reconcile~
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The people love make the little squirrel suffer, right? ;A;
but well... xD waiting for the second part~ >w<
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Welcome to the last part of my special KojiYuu christmas twoshot! :)
I forgot to tell you guys that on 23rd of December was my birthday, and I turned 14 :D I wanna thank my friends who joined in on the fun with me, it was really awesome!
Anyways, here's the last part of the twoshot! Enjoy, and don't forget to follow me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
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Dear Christmas (2 of 2)
Of all days I would meet her in a random place at a random time, it just had to be today.
Ever felt like having a good day over a month full of stress and exhaustion and the next thing you knew, something came up and ruins the entire day. It was the same feeling I’m having right now, except it’s not a ‘thing’ that ruined the day. It’s a person.
In my mind, I was thinking if I didn’t look at her direction and simply ignore her until she goes out of the cafe, I would be fine. But every time I drew my eyes downwards while looking at my hot drink, I couldn’t help but kept sneaking glances at her direction. Even though she broke my heart and I started to grow this hatred for her, I would be lying if I thought she wasn’t looking very beautiful wearing her winter clothes.
"I’ll have the hot chocolate, please."
I heard Haruna ordering a drink at the counter from the same girl I ordered my cafe latte from. Was it just me, or is it strange that I call her by her real name? Maybe I’m just used to calling her by her nickname, that calling her ‘Haruna’ sounded a little formal and strange. Like it sounded different. Haruna. Nyan Nyan.
I should stop arguing about what to call her. It felt stupid as it was.
She leaned against the counter, her finger tapping as she waited for her order while looking around the cafe as if trying to search for a comfortable spot to sit. I silently prayed that she won’t notice me, because apparently the distance between my table and the counter was pretty short. So basically, the odds aren’t entirely in my favor.
I saw her head turning into my direction, and for a brief second, our eyes met. That is until I quickly looked away, looking like a fool of myself as I stared down at my cup of cafe latte. Shit, I’ve been spotted.
Taking a sip of my drink as I tried to calm myself down and ignoring the rapid beating of my heart, I kept assuring myself that it’ll be fine. If she comes here, all I have to do was act natural and try to act as if I don’t care anymore. Then again, I would act cold to her, which wasn’t a big deal also. I took a sip again, my drink almost finished. I felt like I want more, but I have coffee at home so that won’t be a burden anymore.
A shadow cast down over the table, as I could the distinguish figure hovering above me. I couldn’t run away anymore. I already know who it was.
"Yuko."
I looked up, expecting the unexpected. It was her. Looking down on me with a smile so innocent, I don’t think I could ever hate her for a long time. She had a red scarf around her neck, followed by her casual winter clothes. Though simple, she indeed looked amazing. With the rays of morning sunlight piercing through the window and reflecting her appearance above me, in my eyes, she looked like something that came out of my dreams. The love of my life.
But of course, I remembered to keep my mask on.
"Hey, Nyan Nyan." I replied, my voice sounding different that it used to be. A lot more colder, and no sign of friendliness. I thought I saw Haruna flinching, but that could be my imagination.
She looked at the empty seat in front of me, already knowing what she was going to say. “Is this seat taken?”
I took a sip of my drink, my eyes were never looking at her since the beginning. I laid down the glass on top of the small plate that comes with the drink. “It wasn’t taken until you came.”
"So, may I sit here?" Haruna asked.
"I didn’t ask for you to-" I finally looked up at her, ready to rejecting her offer
"May I sit here?" Haruna demanded, her expression turned serious. She was rarely serious at most times except if it concerns about the group or her modelling career, then I would recommend to take her seriously. I’ve seen her being serious at times and whenever I tried to joke around, she would often scold or yell at me for being such a child. I didn’t mind, as long as she has her attention on me then I’d be fine.
Thinking that saying ‘no’ won’t be a good answer, I gave in with a sigh and allowed her to sit. “Fine. Sit down.”
Her expression turned back to normal, taking her scarf off of her neck in the process. “Thank you,” Haruna said, sitting down on the sit in front of me. Settling down the cup of hot chocolate on the table, she blew the drink for cooling the hot liquid with her mouth and took a sip. She let out a silent sigh of satisfaction. Now, I wanted some hot chocolate.
Haruna looked at my empty cup as I was busy looking at the people walking along the street, and lightly pushed the drink across the table. “Do you want some?”
I shook my head, giving her a brief smile while lightly giving back the drink to her. I crossed both of my arms around my chest. “It’s okay, Nyan Nyan. I just finished my cafe latte, so I still feel fool. But, thanks for offering.”
She smiled at me warmly A little too warmly, perhaps. “How are you, Yuko?”
I began to think what I had been doing in the past week. I had been sulking in my bed for as long as I can imagine, thinking of how everything went wrong all because of one breakup. I had been crying my eyes out for hours as I continuously read our old texts, thinking if my love for her was just as useless as trash. I had been hiding under the shadows, hearing the fucking whispers in the walls, demanding me to end it all in one simple swipe of a knife to the neck. I had been having depressed thoughts, mood swings and a hell of a problems in the group. I don’t eat normally, nor do I drink. These past weeks were a living hell for me.
I knew she wouldn’t want to hear all of that.
So instead, I only give her a three-word answer. “I’m doing fine.”
I knew she wouldn’t buy my answer, I knew it because she looked at me with a suspicious look, signaling that I’m lying to the teeth. But who could blame her, in all of seriousness. “What do you mean by that?”
"It means I’m doing just fine, Nyan Nyan. There’s no need for another explanation of how I’m doing now." I said, not liking where this conversation was going. I’m already in a bad mood, and I don’t need to get even more moody just because of her.
"Come on, Yuko. I know you too well that I recognized how you’ve been acting these days," Haruna said, her voice sounded obvious and slightly irritated. "There is no way you could be fine and cheerful like always after the breakup-"
"Never. Say that word again. You hear me?" I cut her off, feeling the anger inside of me ready to explode. "If you want me to be fine and cheerful again, then don’t ever mention about it. Hell, don’t ever mention about everything we did and said during those months of, what do you call it, love? I’m trying hard to forget about it, and you should too."
I noticed how shocked Haruna was when I blurt out every single thing I felt the urge to say out loud right in front of her face, but I’m glad I did. If I didn’t say anything to her at all, I would probably be a depressed wreck. I needed to blow off some steam somehow, so I felt relieved when I finished my sentence.
Still looking dumbfounded, she looked at me with worry. “Is this about us? After all this time?”
I rolled my eyes in irritation, feeling annoyed that she finally caught up with the situation just now. “Well, is there anything that I should be thinking of besides the fact the you fucking played with my heart as if I was some toy, then leaving me as if you never felt anything towards me?” When she didn’t answered my question with an even surprised expression, even though it didn’t need to be answered, I nodded my head. “Exactly,” I said coldly, getting up from my seat while I started to wear my winter coat. “It’s been nice talking with you, Nyan Nyan. Hope you have a nice day.”
I started to walk away from the table, heading towards the exit. I kept hearing my name being called out by Haruna, but I didn’t acknowledge her. I just kept wearing this emotionless face, and walked normally with both of my hands shoved into the pockets of my coat.
I chuckled sadly. Feeling the tears forming in my eyes, I quickly wiped them away before other people could see them.
Who knew that the person I love most could do the most damage for my heart?
-
"You’ve reach the number of Oshima Yuko. Leave a message, and I promise to call you back!"
"Hi, Yuko. It’s me, Nyan Nyan. Listen, I’m sorry about this morning. I didn’t know you were still not over about that… But it’s not what you think, trust me. I could explain everything if you just give me a chance to talk to you. I will come by to your house later today. I’ll see you later, Yuko."
Nyan Nyan. This isn’t a good time to talk.
I just want her to understand that I don’t want anymore of this. I just want to move on. Move on, and continue my career of being an idol and pursuing my future dreams. Not getting stuck in a dilemma in which I can’t get rid of. Maybe it was my time to take a break from her, take a break from love. Maybe.
I shifted around the bed, trying to get a comfortable position where I could sleep in peace. But I couldn’t, as my head was filled with nauseatic thoughts that I begged to stop. Kicking the sheets off of my body aggressively, I hold the sudden urge to scream. The urge to break everything in sight. The urge to jump off from my roof and landed on the cold hard ground with a splat, my blood leaking out from my lifeless body.
These thoughts. They kept me up every single night. And I just want them to stop.
God damn it, please make it stop.
I gripped my head, feeling the need to rip my own hair out and cry as long as I can. But I already wasted all my tears, and now I couldn’t cry anymore. My eyes were red and sore, my breathing was abnormal and fast, I feel like a crazed patient in a mental asylum. But I’m not crazy.
I’m not fucking crazy.
"Yuko, open the door!"
I shook out of my thoughts, immediately shot up from my bed and stood up with my half-asleep legs. Haruna? She still came?
"Yuko, please. Open up."
Maybe I was so caught up in my thoughts, the whispers threatening me in their sinister ways, that I didn’t her the door bell ringing and the loud knocking as well. I’m beginning to lose my grip on reality as we know it. Slowly yet carefully, I walked out my room and head towards the front door, the god-awful headache never stopped throbbing my head.
I gripped on the door knob, and opened it slowly, the cold steel rubbing underneath my shaky hands. I could feel myself wanting to vomit in a matter of seconds, but I hold it in. I peeked outside of the door, and low and behold, it was Haruna.
"What do you want?" I said, my voice came out weak and dry. I coughed a little loudly, making her flinch in surprise.
"I come here to talk to you. Didn’t you get my message?" Haruna asked, looking at me with a lot more worry than this morning. I coughed a little, feeling my throat beginning to sore.
"Yeah, I did," I said, coughing again. I feel my whole body began to feel weak, my forehead dripping cold sweat. I opened the door more wider, so that I could see her clearly. "It’s okay, Nyan Nyan. You don’t need to…"
I feel the weigh of gravity taking over me, as I feel myself beginning to fall down the floor.
Everything turned dark. I couldn’t see anything as my eyes slowly flutter on their own. But, somehow I felt someone holding onto me. Haruna.
"Yuko! Yuko, what’s wrong?"
Her voice was like an echo at the other side of the tunnel, it started to fade as I feel myself losing my grip on reality. I couldn’t force out a word. I couldn’t do anything.
"Yuko…"
Her voice was the only thing I heard before everything went dark.
.
.
.
"How is she?"
"She’s a remarkable person. One of the luckiest, to be honest. She had been ill for almost a whole month, and she hadn’t been eating or sleeping during that period of time. My theory is that she’s been having troubled thoughts, and due to the lack of food in her body, her thoughts affected her physical condition. That, and she’s being too exhausted at work."
"So… will she be okay?"
"From what I see now, she will be alright. She’ll just need some time being treated here, maybe get some more food for her. Until then, I will continue to check up on her if my schedule’s not busy."
"Thank you so much… but, may I see her?"
"Oh, yes. You may see her, but do keep in mind. She’s had a tiring month, so please don’t make a ruckus."
"I won’t, sir. Thank you."
-
She looked fine.
Even she looked incredibly tired, her face worn out with bags under her eyes and the constant sweat dribbling down her forehead, she looked normal. Just like the Yuko I know.
And now, she’s here. Laying in the hospital bed, unconscious. With no signs of life. Hanging in the line between life and death. I could be over dramatic now, but I won’t be if she dies.
As for now, all I could do was wait. All I could do was hold her hand, and look at her with so much guilt and regret. I silently cried, because it feels like the right thing to do when I have the person I love suffering because of me.
I didn’t mean for all of this to happen.
I broke up with her… just so I could give her something special on Christmas.
I saved up all my money to buy a large apartment for the two of us to live in. I even planned to graduate so that I could pay off the rents and bills we will have once we move there. I can imagine her face as I pulled her into the building. She would cry tears of joy, hug me so tightly, kiss me passionately and couldn’t hold on the urge to continue it in our future bedroom.
Now, I can’t see her smile anymore. All because of me.
The silence couldn’t make up how deeply sorry I am.
Is it okay if I could trade places with her? I want to know what it feels like for Yuko to be suffering this bad.
God, why can’t it be that easy…
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
Stop with the beeping. I need to hear her heart beating.
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
"Nyan Nyan…"
My eyes widened in shock. My head shot up, praying to God that this isn’t a dream and not my imagination.
It was her. Awake from her slumber.
"Yuko!"
I didn’t hesitate once more to hug her tightly in my arms.
I cried. I cried, and I didn’t feel embarrassed by it. I’m just glad that I get to see her, to hold her again like we used to, to hear her lovely voice in my ears. There was nothing in this world I could feel lost with except her.
"I’m sorry… I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to…"
I poured all my emotions out with my tears, in order for her to see how guilty I was to make her suffer much more than I expected. Yuko might be a forgivable person, but I still feel guilty about everything I did to her the past month. I wish saying sorry was as easy as giving her a kiss.
I felt her hand stroking my hair softly, her arms wrapping around my body as I began to cry even louder.
"It’s okay, Nyan Nyan…" She whispered weakly. "I couldn’t stay mad at you forever, you know. I love you too much to get angry with you…"
Her hand continued to stroke my hair as she kept embracing me when my cries turned into sniffs, my tears staining her clothes. I hoped she didn’t mind.
"Nyan Nyan…"
I pulled away from the embrace, looking at her eyes. They were tired but still full of love. She slowly showed her warm smile to me, her hand digging for something under the blanket. When she pulled out the object in her hand, I didn’t know what to react until she spoke up.
"Merry Christmas."
She opened the small box in her hand, and I saw what was inside. My eyes began to tear up again. I planned myself to only give her the Christmas present, but never expected her to also give me one.
"Yuko…"
It was a golden necklace. With the initials ‘H & Y’ painted in bright, sparkly gold.
Holding the urge to sob again, but this time in happiness, I saw her lips forming into a smile so genuine that I knew for sure that she still loves me, even after all she has been through so much. She picked up the necklace from the small red box, set the box down on the bed and held the necklace in front of me. It shimmered beautifully under the hospital light.
"Allow me," Yuko said weakly, and I allowed to put the necklace around my neck as I tried my very best to not cry again. I felt her fingers brushing against my neck when she finished putting the necklace on me. Feeling her hand on my cheek and gently caressing it, she couldn’t stop smiling at me with her eyes looking at me with so much love.
"I was about to give you this on our anniversary, but… I didn’t get a chance to give you this when you left me."
I let the tears flow out of my eyes, as I couldn’t them any longer. It was a gift. She was about to give it to me, before I broke up with her. I remembered that she wanted to tell me something but I cut her off and tell her it was over.
How could I be so cruel to her?
"It’s a good thing I didn’t get into a coma, or I wouldn’t have give you this now," She said, chuckling lightly at the little joke at the end of her sentence. She leaned in closer to me, and kissed me in the forehead. And that’s when I realized how much I missed her kisses.
She looked at me deeply into my eyes, as I look at hers. We were caught up in a moment of clarity, and I couldn’t help but couldn’t feel mesmerized by just looking at her eyes.
"I love you."
And I have the right to say it back. “I love you too.”
As our lips touched, I knew for sure that both of us get what we wanted for Christmas. It might not be as good as the apartment I bought for us, but what’s most important was our love.
It never died, and it never faded. It just got lost in transition along the way.
-
Hello AryaMachi-san
I've just read your one or two shots :on study:
All the fics made my day :ding: even though it was all sad and tragedy one, except some :sweat:
I love your writing style :luvluv1: It's so great :on GJ:
Anyway, waiting for your new update :on drink:
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aww another finished kojiyuu fic :heart: :love: :heart:
nyan nyan's plans are alwys terrible it can always make yuko hurt or suffer but
still its very sweet at the end :inlove: :inlove:
thank you for the fic and belatef happy birthday!!!
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You really update, my guess is rite XD
How carefree our cat-queen of airhead, isn't it?? Planning a surprise like that *facepalmed* LOL but it's cute though >w<
Thankyou for this kojiyuu story on christmas, arya-san (>̯͡⌣<̯͡) really a joy on christmas ><
And oh, I dunno about your birthday! Sorry :(
Happy belated birthday then =D
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i've been reading your kojiyuu's on tumblr! great writer~ T_T) please continue writing.
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Wow! :shocked You are so young yet you can write this great. Belated Happy Birthday! :mon santa2:
To the story: Things didn't went as they planned. Both ruined the gifts they were about to give. :cry:
But I'm glad everything still went well. :twothumbs
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I have welcome myself into the world of horror! *creepy laugh*
Though, I’m warning you. I take the horror genre seriously, so if you still keep reading this fanfic, I already gave you a heads up.
Enjoy! And please follow me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
----
This fanfiction contains dark, horror themes that mau not be good for the faint of heart. Readers discretion is advised. If you cannot handle horror themes, I suggest not reading this. If you still read this, I hope you enjoy.
Creaks at Night: 1 of 2
"How do you like the house, Rena-chan?"
"I told you, Jurina. It’s really lovely, though I’m still surprised that your parents actually agreed with you moving into a new house with me."
Jurina chuckled as she walked out of the bathroom, a white towel over her wet hair. She heads over to the bed in her pajamas, where another girl was laying on the bed. The older girl looked up from the novel she was reading, and smiled warmly as she saw her lover walking over to the bed.
"I’m glad you like it, Rena-chan," Jurina said, throwing the towel aside and crawled up to the bed, laying a soft kiss of her lover’s forehead. The older girl blushed at the young girl’s action, while the latter couldn’t help but look amused at the embarrassed girl next to her. "Do you wanna get some sleep?"
Rena nodded. “Yeah, that sounds good. I nearly forgot tomorrow we still have dance practice at the theater, and then the next day we have practice with AKB for our early performance on PON.” She yawned, turning off the lamp beside her. In just a second, she and Jurina were alone accompanied with the darkness around the room. The only source of light was the moon shining against the window pane.
Jurina sneaked under the blankets in order to get closer to Rena, and wrapped her arm around the older girl’s waist. Jurina’s face went in closer to Rena’s neck, inhaling her sweet scent and letting out a sigh of contentment. Rena was used to kind of treatment, so it doesn’t embarrassed her anymore.
"Good night, Rena-chan. I love you," Jurina said, before drifting to sleep.
"Good night. I love you, too."
[3:07 am]
It was a peaceful night for the people sleeping in the city of Nagoya, as the crickets continued their songs in the bushes while the moon shined down its light towards the residents below. No one was seen walking around the street, the only thing left alive was 24/7 convenient stores that were scattered around the city.
In the suburban area, it was as quiet as the city. Maybe too quiet for the two people who were sleeping in each other’s arms.
Creak.
Jurina’s ear twitched lightly, grunting in a low voice as she shifted to a little more position with her eyes still closed. Her arm remained still around Rena’s waist, and the young girl felt the drowsiness as she began to drift off again.
Creak.
Jurina’s eyes fluttered open slightly, grumbling as she rubbed her eyes with one hand. Blinking a couple of times and waited for her eyes to adjust the darkness, she looked around the room to check if there was something off.
But the room remained the same as it usual was.
'What was with all the creaking?' Jurina wondered confusingly.
The thought soon left her mind when she laid her head down against the pillow, and fell asleep.
-
"Wow, Jurina. You looked as if you didn’t got any sleep last night."
Jurina groaned, rubbed her eyes in exhaustion. “I didn’t. I was kept all night hearing these stupid creaking sounds. I would’ve gone to investigate it, but since I watch horror movies, I use common sense and not go to where the sound came from.”
Akane rolled her eyes, hearing her friend’s statement wasn’t something she was looking forward at lunch. They were all sitting on the floor, bentos in hand while their chopsticks continued to grab and stick food into their mouths. All of them were tired and hungry, so it was a good thing the staff brought it lots of bentos for them to eat.
"But seriously. I’m confused," Jurina wondered, putting more chicken into her mouth. "I just bought the house, so there’s no way it could be haunted in a day."
"You’re maybe right, though. There’s no way anyone dumb enough to sneak into your house and does nothing but goes up and down the stairs just to keep you up all night," Akane explained her opinion, shoving rice and teriyaki into her mouth. "Not jumping into conclusions, but it’s weird when you bought a new house in just a day and started having weird things going on around it."
Jurina nodded in agreement. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”
Akane raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure you didn’t make love with Rena-chan last night? You could have been tired because of that.”
"Churi!" Jurina quickly whined. "I’m still eating, and I’m not in the mood to talk about ‘that’, alright?"
Chuckling at her friend, Akane shook her head before getting back to eating her food.
[9:30 pm]
"Well, look who’s eager to sleep," Rena joked as she crawled next to Jurina in the bed, who’s already prepared to get some shut eye when Rena was still in the shower.
"Yeah well, I didn’t get much sleep last night, so I can’t wait to get some tonight!" Jurina immediately cuddled against the older girl as the lights were turned off by the her. "Good night, Rena-chan."
Rena chuckled. “Good night, Jurina.”
[3:00 am]
Rena sighed as she got up from the toilet seat, flushing it afterwards. It was moments like these when the girl regretted drinking too much water before bed. But at last, she finally let it all go.
Pulling up her pants and adjusting it for a bit, she walked towards the sink. Turning on the faucet, she washed her hand thoroughly, while pouring some soap in her hands just to make it smell sweet. Rena was a clean person, and never liked it anything that isn’t clean or unhygienic.
Humming a soft tune of a song she currently liked, she looked at the mirror to see how her hair was. Rena frowned as there were some hair sticking out in different places, so she remained the faucet on for now and adjusted her hair a bit. Once she was done, she began to wash her hands while still checking for ugly strainds at the end and for anything removable to be remove from her face.
Rena sighed inwardly. ‘I guess it’s the time I have to grow pimples.’
Thump.
Rena jumped a little, her shoulders tensed up and her heart skipped a beat when her ears perked up to a sudden sound coming from her bedroom. Confusion struck her, she tilted her back so she was able to peak at her bedroom without leaving the sink.
She raised an eyebrow. Must’ve been a mice or something, she thought. Thinking it was nothing, she revert back to washing her handa which seemed too clean. Rena’s handa started to wash her face with the cold water, feeling the cool liquid refreshing her stressed mind. Maybe she’s beginning to imagine things.
Only this, she was sure that the sound came from her bedroom.
Thump.
Rena’s head jerked back to the door, her paranoia alerting her senses as fear began to fill in her mind. She called out her lover’s name in a soft voice, knowing that Jurina would still hear her. “Jurina?”
But no sound came from the bedroom. As the young girl was still sleeping.
Her paranoia increased, her mind filled with endless possibilities and questions of how there might be a robber in the house. She was not going to think of the possibility of a ghost, since she wasn’t a believer in that subject.
Unexpectedly, her hands started to feel sticky and the water felt a lot more thicker than it usual was. She jerked her head back quicker to see what it was.
A high pitched scream left her throat when she noticed her hand was covered in crimson blood.
The blood in her veins rushed into her head as she fell back harshly onto the floor, screaming in fear and shock at her blood-covered hands. The red liquid felt warm and fresh, as it was sucked right out of someone’s body, followed by small chuncks of meat that looked like human flesh.
She could hear an evil laugh echoing throughout the bathroom. The sound of it was the mocking kind.
And she couldn’t stop feeling terrified as she realized this wasn’t a dream.
It was all real.
"Rena!" The panicked young girl ran in to the bathroom just as she heard her lover screaming her lungs out, she quickly kneeled down next to her and grasped her arms to calm her down. "Rena, what’s wrong? What happened?!"
Rena looked at Jurina with so much fear and horror, that it made the other girl flinched from her terrified expression. “M-My hands! Th-they’re covered in-” She looked back at her hands, and find an unbelievable surprise.
Both of her hands were spotless.
She breathed in and out heavily, trying to comprehend the situarion. Flipping both of her hands multiple times, she kept checking to see if there were any sign of blood on them. But there were none. They remained spotless.
Cold sweat dripped down her forehead. What the fuck is going on?
"B-but…" Rena stuttered, looking at her two pair of hands in disbelief. "They were covered in blood… I swear to God, they were…"
Jurina sighed. “Practice is beginning to get into your head. You’re just imagining things, Rena,” She helped the older girl up, wrapping her arms around the scared girl protectively. “Come on, let’s go back to sleep, Rena-chan. It’ll be okay now.”
Rena couldn’t say anything but nod in agreement as the thought of Jurina’s warm arms protecting her while she sleeps soothe her mind.
They walked back to the bedroom, and slept soundly in each other’s arms. Even though Rena was still shaking from the shock she received in the bathroom.
-
'Go into the basement…'
Stop it.
"Yeah, Jurina. That sounds like a great idea! Karaoke night might help us calm down a bit after this week’s training."
'I have so much to show you…'
Please, just leave me alone.
"Alright! So who’s coming? We have Airin, Churi, Yukko, Kanon-"
'What are you waiting for, little girl? Go in the fucking basement…'
"What about you, Rena-chan? Are you going to-"
"Will you just leave me alone?!"
The unexpected outburst surprised everyone in the room. The constant laughs and chatters of the members stopped immediately after they heard the sudden scream of their beloved ace. All eyes turned to Rena, while the girl tried hard to calm her racing heart.
Breathing in and out slowly, she looked at everyone’s shocked and concern faces. In a blink of an eye, her expression changed back to where it usually was. She felt so embarrassed at the random outburst, but she wanted the voices in her head to stop before it gets too much.
She bowed her head down, cold sweat dribbling down her chin. “I-I’m sorry…”
When everyone’s attention revert to their own selves, the shocked Airin who called her name moments ago asked the shivering girl.
"Rena-chan, are you okay?" Airin asked in concern of the older girl. "If you don’t want to join, we could totally understand."
Rena shook her head. “No, it’s not that, Airin. I-I’m really sorry about screaming. I just…”
Airin smiled kindly, and patted Rena’s hand softly. “It’s okay, Rena-chan. Oh, and be sure to get some sleep tonight. I could see those bags under your eyes.”
"Really?" Rena inquired. "I didn’t notice them before."
"So, guys! Akarin just told me that she could come. All we have to do is…"
As the conversation went on normally like usual, Rena let out a deep sigh and leaned her body onto the young girl beside. Her mind was tired of all the weird whispers and training was also talking its toll on her. She needed rest, and she couldn’t beg for more except that.
She felt Jurina wrapping her arm around her body, giving warmth and shelter from anything disturbing her mind.
"Are you okay? I’m beginning to worry about you." The soothing voice of her lover calmed Rena down a bit, and her soulders stopped tensing up because of it.
"I’m okay. I’m just tired, that’s all." Rena said, closing her eyes in exhaustion. She wanted sleep. She wanted nothing else but rest her head against a fluffy pillow and drift off into slumber.
"Since today’s a half day, how about we go straight to our house and sleep for the rest of day? Does that sound good?" Jurina asked.
Rena nodded, smiling a little. “Yeah, that sounds wonderful.”
[14:45 pm]
Spitting out the remains of toothpaste in her mouth with water, Jurina turned off the faucet and wiped her mouth with a white towel. She sighed in content, feeling her teeth clean and pearly white. Checking her teeth one last time, she went out of the bathroom while not forgetting to turn off the light.
Jurina yawned. It was a good thing that today was a half day for all members, because everyone deserves the rest they needed. So, after the Matsui couple went back to their house, they quickly changed their clothes and get ready to sleep through the rest of the day.
Though, they haven’t even slept yet. Because as soon as Jurina went to the bed and noticed the bedsheets pulled up, she realized something.
Rena wasn’t on the bed.
Confusion ran through the girl’s head as she looked around the room to find her lover missing. She went out of the bedroom, and called out the other girl’s name.
"Rena-chan?"
No reply was heard. Paranoia and confusion began to fill her mind with questions. She could’ve sworn she saw Rena on their bed, sleeping soundly with the bed sheets covering most of her body. But now, she was nowhere to be found.
Where could she be, Jurina thought. Just as she was going to walk downstairs towards the kitchen, she heard a small sound.
Thump.
The slight sound startled the young girl, making her jump a little as she looked left and right frantically. In the silence of the room, she could feel her heart racing. Paranoia was mixed with fear, and she doesn’t like the feeling of it.
She called out again. “Rena-chan?”
Thump.
Jurina’s head jerked back towards the kitchen, wondering where the hell was the sound coming from. It wasn’t from the kitchen, for starters. But the girl’s eyes was glued to the small corner next to the kitchen.
Cautiously, Jurina’s legs began to unconsciously step forward.
Thump.
As the young girl finally made it to the corner, she peaked her head to the corner which leads to a door she never knew of until now. But what’s more surprising, was the girl in front of it.
Rena was slowly hitting her head against the wooder door. And every hit she made created a sound a thumping sound across the house.
"Rena-chan?"
Jurina walked towards the seemingly unconscious girl, since Rena wasn’t responding her calls since the beginning. As Jurina laid both of her hands onto the older girl’s shoulders, it somehow shook the girl from her daze.
"Rena-chan, what are you doing?" Jurina asked worriedly.
Rena groaned slightly, rubbing her forehead as she tried to get a grip on reality. “What happened…”
"You were asleep on the bed, but then suddenly found you here. I think you’re sleepwalking, which is pretty rare," Jurina chuckled. "Come on, let’s go to bed."
Even though the older girl didn’t reply, Rena obliged what Jurina had said. They walked up the stairs and climbed into their comfy bed.
"Wait, I forgot to make some tea."
"Tea?" Jurina asked.
"Yeah, I remembered getting up and heard you telling me to go make some tea for the both of us…" Rena yawned exhaustingly, laying her head on Jurina’s chest.
"But I didn’t told you to make some tea."
Rena didn’t respond, her eyes closed while her breathing slow yet calm. And it made Jurina somehow relaxed. To see the tired girl resting was enough for her to make her happy.
Kissing the sleeping girl’s forehead, she whispered softly into Rena’s ear.
"We’ll make some tea in the morning, Rena. Now, sleep tight."
She rested her head back against the pillow, and let her eyelids droop as slumber began to take over her.
"I love you, Rena."
-
CREEPY ~ SCARY ~ :twisted:
But still a good story , Hope you will continue :heart:
-
Here's the second part! And I apologized if it's short, but I promised the last part will be worth it. :)
Enjoy, and follow me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi (http://twitter.com/AryaMachdi)
--
Creaks at Night: 2 of 3
"Jurina…"
It was dark. The type of dark where I couldn’t see anything, just the pitch black. I didn’t know where I am. My eyes were heavy, making it hard for me to open them with ease. But I was still confused on where the hell I am right now.
"Jurina…"
The whisper came again, its faint echo filling my ears. I groaned slightly as I feel my head spinning for an unknown reason.
"Wake up, Jurina."
I felt a gentle stroke of hand across my cheek, the heavy weight above my eyes began to fade. Slowly fluttering my eyes, I started to feel something cold clenching around both of my wrists. My vision dark and fuzzy, making it hard to see where I was. Suddenly, a gut wrenching smell came up to my nose, and in reflex, my eyes shot up. I immediately cough, feeling my stomach churn from the horrid smell and I tried my best to not throw up.
Hearing the loud clinking of metal, I quickly look both at left and right. My eyes grew in confusion and panic, as I noticed metal shackles wrapped around my wrist. My breathing began frantic, feeling the paranoia and fear creeping into my mind.
I pulled my hand underneath the cuff, thinking that I could slip my hand out of there, but regret it immediately when I felt a searing pain on my wrist as if I was stabbed. I let out a loud scream of pain.
It was no use. I’m trapped.
"You finally woke up, Jurina."
I jerked my head in every direction once I heard a mysterious voice from the darkness. My eyes weren’t cooperating very well as they haven’t adjusted their selves towards the darkness. The air in the room turned completely still, a slight ringing in my ear was heard.
Until the lights turned.
I groaned as the sudden light blinded my eyes, in reflex closing them from getting intense eye damage. I fluttered them open slightly, finding myself looking down on the white stained floor. My eyebrows scrunched up as I noticed something odd. Blood stains. There were blood stains all over the floor from where I was held standing with these shackles in my hands.
My head slowly lifted upwards, and what I saw wasn’t what I was expecting.
I was in this room. A room small enough to be a living room, but too big for a bedroom. In the distance, a worn-out wooden door stands between what I believed the outside world and this room. The white walls looked aged, as if they were there for years, or maybe decades. A terrified feeling swept over me when I noticed the exact blood stains on the walls, similar to the ones on the floor. A lamp was hanging onto the ceiling in the middle of the room, flickering every now and then, looking like it needed to be replaced.
My head was still dizzy, and that’s when I felt something liquid dribbling down my cheeks and onto my lips. My tongue stuck out and licked it, eyes widening as I tasted what the liquid was. My own fresh blood.
"Ugh…"
My eyes jerked forwards, feeling my heart beating faster and my eyes growing wide from shock. I didn’t noticed there was table at the middle of the room.
And I didn’t noticed that I wasn’t alone here.
"C-Churi?"
As I called out the person who I thought it would be, her head jerked to the right and I saw her eyes widening as well. She started to get up from her position which was lying down on the table, but she failed to realized that both of her hands and foot were tied up with strong rope. When she finally noticed it, she started to move frantically, desperately trying to escape but in reality, she couldn’t.
"What’s going on? W-Where am I?!" Churi exclaimed, fear and panic audible in her voice. She started to pull her hands harder, thinking that the rope would cut loose. But I’ve seen that rope a couple of times in stores. Those kinds of rope also helped people ending their lives just by hanging their neck around it as the jumped off from a tree, or a high place. Those kinds of rope were damn near impossible to escape from.
"I wouldn’t be loud if I were you," I said, stating my opinion out loud. "For starters, the person who tied us up will eventually hear us."
"I agree with her, Churi."
Hearing the mysterious voice again, my head jerked to where it came from. As I have finally met my eyes with the culprit, I never thought I could ever be this shock in my life. She looked at me with her eyes filled with this void of horrid and evil, her lips grinning sadistically as she walked towards me, the tapping of high heels echoing throughout the room. I couldn’t move nor say anything I was left there in shock.
She stood in front of me, a dark aura surrounding her. I could hear my hear beating loudly. I couldn’t believe it.
"Rena…"
She grinned a lot wider when I finally spoke out her name. The name of the person I loved, and now, she isn’t there anymore. Just this sinister looking person who looked like the devil himself. Her hand started to stroke my cheek softly, which I badly flinched. It was cold and unfamiliar. And I hated it.
Her other hand wanders around her pocket on the red dress she was wearing, pulling out a black handkerchief. Before I could even react or even ask what she was about to do, she quickly wrapped it around my mouth, tying it at the back of my head. I started to speak, but it was muffled due to the fabric on my mouth making in hard to talk.
Her hand cupped my cheeks, forcing me to look straight in her eyes. From the moment they met, I knew this isn’t the Rena I know. This isn’t the Rena I love. Something in controlling her, and I don’t even know what.
"Everything will be okay, Jurina. Just trust me…" She said in this grave tone that sent chills down my spine. With a grin so sinister, she let go of my face, allowing me to breath normally. But it started to get uncontrollable when I noticed that her hands weren’t empty.
She was carrying a chainsaw.
I started to move, panicking on what she was about to do. “W-Wait, what are you doing?”
She moved towards a small table, a record player laying on top as it remained untouched. But it was until she started to turn it on, that it finally played something. A song. A slowed down version of Heavy Rotation played through the speakers of the device, every crackling sound it made starting to make me feel weird.
Though my panic didn’t stop there as Rena started to walk towards Churi, who was still laying down on the table while freaking out as she realized what her friend was about to do. Only, it wasn’t her friend that she was looking at. It wasn’t Rena.
She started to scream for help, though the record player started to turn up the volume automatically as her screams began to increased. Every inch of my body wasn’t prepared for what’s going to happen next. With a pull of the starter, the chainsaw fired up. I kept screaming and screaming, begging for Rena to stop, but it only came out as muffled sounds. I started to yank the shackles on my hands, pulling them as hard as I could, but it won’t budge. I repeated my cursed word in my mind as I tried to do something instead of witnessing the death of my own friend.
But I couldn’t do anything. No matter how hard I tried, it won’t budge. And I prepared myself as I could hear the bone crunching sound of the chainsaw making contact of raw flesh.
What made it worse; the record player wasn’t really helping at drowning the screams.
It was horrible. Churi’s screaming was just something I never heard of. Full of pain and horror, feeling her own skin and meat getting sawed by a machine used to cutting wood. I looked down at the floor, feeling defeated while I continued to listen her ear-piercing screams. Her screams died down, but her blood kept splattering across the white floor. I feel my insides churn, wanting to throw up but I swallowed it. This was just too much to hear and see.
I heard the chainsaw turning off. But as I lifted my head, it was just in time for Churi’s decapitated head to be thrown onto a small bucket. The worse thing was her mouth and eyes were still wide open.
I breathed uncontrollably, knowing that the next victim was me. I looked down at the floor hopelessly, as I know this will be the end.
"Now, now Jurina."
I jerked my head up, my eyes meeting the now blood-covered Rena with the chainsaw still in her hands. I straighten myself up for the worse, but I still have a sense of panic and horror within me.
"I want you to hold still… Move a muscle, and it will hurt a lot more than you think…" She said, starting off the loud contraption in her hands. It turned on with a roar-like sound. It’s spinning shard edges getting closer and closer to me. I frantically moved out of control, trying to escape my own death. Her face flat with no emotions, looking as if killing someone was a normal thing to do. "Your fate will be the same as Airin and Churi if you move an inch."
I closed my eyes. Allowing fate as what it is.
As I felt it came in contact with my stomach, I let out one last scream of my own last breath.
:::
My eyes shot wide open, and screamed as loud as I can.
Cold sweat dribbled down my forehead as my chest continued to thump heavily, my heart not calming down for just a second. I breathed in and out, trying to calm my mind and myself down. I rubbed my forehead, closing my eyes for just a moment. For one moment, it all felt too real. But it was all just one messed up nightmare.
I turned my head to the side, expecting Rena to be next to me. But she wasn’t. I looked around in confusion, wondering where did she went this time. Until I heard her scream coming from the bathroom. Not a moment to lose, I jumped off the bed and ran towards where her scream came from.
"Rena!" I exclaimed, going into the bathroom to find her knelt down onto the floor, hearing her quiet cries while her hand seemed to be covering something on her arm. Instantly crouching down next to her, I grabbed her shoulders and gently shook to know that I’m here beside her.
"Rena, what is it? What’s wrong?" I said, my eyes not leaving her arm. I could something red on it, but I don’t know what.
"M-My arm…" She said softly, her voice a little shaky and she started to cry again. She let go of her arm so that she could let me see what she was hiding. As she showed me what was on her arm, my eyes grew wide in shock and horror.
I held her body close to mine, her cries beginning to turn into sobs when she hid her on my chest. I tightly wrapped my arms around her weak body, protecting her from upcoming harm and danger. I looked around the room, feeling the air around tensed.
In my mind, I could hear their sinister laughs. Their eyes looking at us like we’re some kind of toys. We were a part of something inhuman. Something that we shouldn’t be messing around it. And it wants to do one, simple thing.
GET OUT
It’s what was written all over Rena’s arm and wrist.
-
Horrors are always my cup of tea :)
So thumbs up :cow: :cow:
2 of 3. arere?
It means more horror :heart: :heart: AKBjyeahhhhhhhh
Thank you :bow:
-
I decided to make a short oneshot before writing ‘Heaven’, which the teaser poster was posted on Twitter.. It so nice to finally write again. Hello, everyone.
This fanfic is dedicated for BabySakura (or kizumi here in the forums), give her lots of warm hugs because she’s feeling incredibly ill lately and I want to make her feel better. Get better soon, Baby-san~ :)
:::
Hospital Bed
"Have you grown wrinkles by any chance?"
It was a strange question, most people will agree on that. But when she’s physically ill, lying hopelessly in the hospital bed, forced to take three pills a day after meals while repetitively watching the television in utter boredom, I don’t think it was a little strange at all. In fact, I’m already used to these kinds of questions.
"What gave you that idea, Jurina?" I asked, looking at her confusingly. She revealed her trademark smile, though it looked sightly weaken and tired. I don’t need to remind her that she has to sleep at least two times a day, three times was better. Sleep fights sickness, according to the doctor.
"Well, from the way you worked and trained harder these days, I guess the thought seemed pretty accurate," Jurina said, half-smiling. "I heard that you got mad at Airin yesterday. A big one, too."
I smiled, drinking my hot chocolate from my small decorated thermos, and silently remembering the image of myself getting angry at one of my best friends. “It wasn’t that big, but Airin still managed to piss me off for showing me one of her favorite ‘anime’ series.”
"Let me guess. It’s a hentai series," Jurina guessed, smirking.
"Ding ding ding. We have a winner," I grinned. I hand out my thermos in front of her, shifting my seat a little bit closer to her bed. "You want some of my hot chocolate? And don’t say no, I could see the look in your face when you saw me drinking."
Jurina laughed, shaking her head. “You know me too well, Rena-chan.”
I stared at her deeply as she started to drink the warm beverage, letting me sink in the situation in front of me. Her condition was sadly began to worsen, presumably because of the amount of work and stress due to training these days. Remembering the shows and events we’ve been having, I could see the obvious look of fatigue on her face just by a single glance.
She was still young. Too young to have all these things panning down on her.
I wish there was someway to bring back the times where this girl, the girl in front of me who was happily drinking the hot cocoa I gave to her, could still be the strong girl I missed seeing.
If only there was a way.
"Rena."
I snapped out of my thoughts. “Yeah?”
I saw Jurina smiled, and I felt stomachs did a couple of backflips. “I just wanna say thank you for letting me take a picture with you,” She coughed for a moment, clearing her throat before she continued. “I missed taking pictures with you, Rena-chan.”
I was surprised to hear this from her, because from the past few months or so, our relationship was pretty sour. It wasn’t that we hate each other, because we don’t, it’s just the amount of work we have separately made us have less time for each other, which is depressing. Really, it is. Jurina was so used to being close to me, now I felt like I barely even know her anymore.
That is why, when I heard her sentence, I stood up from my seat and gave her the warmest hug I could ever give to a person.
Her body was warm, but it’s warm in a way a sick person would. But still, I missed hugging her. It felt so right, and peaceful right here. In this very moment.
I gave her a long yet soft kiss on the forehead, my fingers slowly stroking her hair. They were soft and silky, just like how I remembered. I love her. I really, really love her. I know I fear society and how it would react to us after the discovery of our secret affair, but I love her. Constellations and stars doesn’t fascinate me anymore if the ghostly presence of the young girl I love will keep haunting my head every day. And, I love her. It’s as simple as that.
When our foreheads touched, I smile. “You don’t know how overjoyed I am after you say that.”
Jurina also returned the smile, softly tucking a strain of hair behind my ear. “That’s a good thing, right?”
"Of course it is, you baka," I said, before our lips met.
I was melt under the passion. The taste of her lips, made me melt like a hot candle. The air hovering above us lightened, as we continued to fix our broken hearts we had been hiding from others for months, aching for each other’s touch or company. After so long, time has finally settled upon our needs. And right now, I feel grateful for not doubting the undeniable love for Matsui Jurina.
We broke the kiss, smiling like little kids as our foreheads touched.
"I’m feeling quite horny, Rena-chan," Jurina said seductively, and I could only giggle at her attempt to convey me into making love with her in a hospital bed. With nurses walking down the hallways every five minutes.
Poking her nose, I smiled warmly at her.
"You have to be strong first before you could please me, baka."
-
OMG!! I need the continuation of this fanficion: Creaks at Night
Almost tonight was afraid to think about your story ... lol
Hospital bed. I like me a lot to!! I really like this type of history that have a base in the reality.
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=HOSPITAL BED=
~Hello :D
~A cute and sweet Wmatsui One-shot
~Rena’s observation at Jurina is quite true because, at such a young age, Jurina is a famous young idol that her health suffer because of her over work…
{Poor Juju…She’s just doing her best for her beloved fans…}
~Anyway, I laughed at Jurina’s flirtarious traits that she wants to make love at the beaustiful Rena…
~I hope there’s a ~SMUT~ scenes…Hehe… Just a suggestion
~Thank You~
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Please update your "Creaks at Night" soon!! It's so good that I can't wait to read the last part. I'm scaredy cat but I wanna read it because it's so good!
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Good :twothumbs
:bow: thank you for writing this great FF
please more FF Wmatui and Mayuki because I really liked the couple's :wub:
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pliiiiiis don´t forget uS!!
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“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close." - Pablo Neruda
:::
All of Me
It would be nice for celebrities, musicians, actors and idol group members to escape the entertainment life for once and try to live like a normal person. No more press conferences, meetings, shows, fan hangouts, huge billboards that has their face on it. They would live like a regular face in the crowd, with no one to recognize them or asking their autographs. There would be no more stress. They would just live normally.
But the possibility of an ounce of freedom is a mere speck of dust. Kojima Haruna noticed this, and she knew she couldn't do anything to change it.
Life as a famous person isn't as easy as you thought it might be. Having millions of people know your name and talent is a blessing, but having to go through endless of different schedules everyday would be called a curse. A regular person would dream of becoming well-known, but people like Haruna only wanted a life where they don't have to attend photo shoots and variety shows. A life where she would simply sit at home, watch TV on the couch with snacks satisfying her hungry stomach.
No matter how badly she wanted that, she knew she wouldn't go back to being plain Kojima Haruna. That she's stuck with idol-group member Kojima Haruna.
The past week has been nothing but work, work, and more work which further increased her levels of stress. As a professional, she took it with no hesitation and proceed to to do whatever she was told to do, and start doing the next one. Day by day, her schedules would be the same but her manager often change them if necessary. Haruna never objected nor protest, she went along with the flow and work it off. But recently, the amount of stress has reached its peak, and she didn't understand why.
But she actually did. It happened after the graduation of her best friend, her comrade, her missing half. Anyone who doesn't know Oshima Yuko would be much of an idiot, because the girl was incredibly hardworking. All the attention she received, all the fans that adored, she deserved it. She deserved everything she got.
Before graduation, they made a promise to still be able to keep in touch no matter how far, how busy their days are, they would keep their years long friendship intact and in shape. As Yuko was sure of this, Haruna wasn't. She knew how busy the other girl would be after graduation, and eventually, there would be days where they won't be able to chat or meet up. But she kept her promise, praying that she or Yuko will break it even once.
It has already been months since the graduation.
Each and every day went by with an aching feeling in Haruna's heart, as she felt lonely without the presence of the person she cared most by her side.
-
"Kojima-san?"
"Yes?"
"I just wanted to tell you that there will be no more schedules for you tonight, so you are free to go after this photo shoot. I guess it's about time you take a night without work in the way."
"Ah, that sounds really nice," Haruna smiled. "Thanks for telling me, manager-san."
The manager nodded before closing the door, leaving the girl in complete silence once again. On the inside, she was glad. Glad to have the rest of the Friday night to herself, and no one else. It's been awhile since she have the chance go on a nightly walk and ate dinner at a random restaurant, then going home to catch some snooze. And that, she would do it mostly alongside with Yuko. But since the girl wasn't with her right now as she was busy doing whatever she's doing in some other place, Haruna must spend her night by herself.
Sighing sadly, she stood up from seat as she started to pack up her things into her purse. Being the person who less likely to bring a lot of things to work, bringing her phone, wallet and some make-up along with a small pack of tissues was enough for her. Carrying a much larger weight on her shoulder was, in her honest opinion, a waste of energy and time. It didn't take long for her to finish packing her things, and was ready to head out of the building where her last photo shoot of the day was held. Bidding goodbye to the photographer and other staffs, she walked out with expectations to have a relaxing night already in her mind.
The streets of Tokyo never seemed too cold, or too hot for people wearing one layer of clothing to be walking around in the night. Normally a jacket or sweater would be provided, but for tonight and only for tonight, a long sleeved t-shirt and black jeans were comfortable enough for Haruna. Reaching for her earphones in her pocket, she took out her phone from her purse and plugged the earphone jack into the given place on the phone where most adapter jacks of earphones plug into. She put the two earbuds into both of her ears, and start playing a random song in her playlist.
Haruna hold back a scoff as the song both written and composed by a certain American musician started playing in her ears.
'Out of the hundreds songs I have, it had to be the one with John Legend,' She thought, almost irritatingly.
It's funny how every song she had in her phone always reminded her of Yuko, whether if it's a sad or happy song. As hard as it was letting her graduate and leave the group, it was hard enough to not have her around most of the time. They did almost everything together, except for having a shower together which was requested by Yuko and denied by Haruna herself. So, having the person who has been with her for years suddenly went missing or simply creating a border between them due to work, gave Haruna the hardest time of her life.
There were nights where Haruna would simply cry, and never stop. Eventually, she would fall asleep afterwards and woke up with red eyes and tear stained cheeks. But nowadays, she was able to control her emotions and kept being the professional person she was.
She knew she wouldn't be able to hold it any longer. She knew that one day, whenever that is, she will break down and feel lost again. She wasn't strong. She wasn't as strong as Yuko. The girl was stronger than Haruna, and she knew that.
She'll just have to try. Try, and try, and try.
Haruna chuckled. "How can I try when you're not even around anymore?"
She stopped on her tracks, looking up from the pavement below her feet and saw the name of the restaurant above her head. She didn't realize where she was going until she snapped out of her thoughts, and found herself in front of the restaurant she and Yuko used to come over and have dinner during their free time. Even just a simple memory of a place or conversation made her heat ache.
She sighed. She might as well go inside.
"Looks like tonight is my lucky night."
A familiar voiced filled her eyes, making her eyes widened in shock. Turning her head to side, praying it to be her, heart beating faster as she saw the girl with the brown coat and dark pants looking at her with the signature toothy smile.
The girl giggled. "Hi, Nyan Nyan."
There were no words to describe the amount of shock coming from the taller girl as she gazed on the girl she had been daydreaming of, the girl she missed the most, the girl she yearned to have skinship for months. The sounds of honking cars, muffled music from inside of the restaurant and light shuffles from other people walking along the street didn't bother her as she took a big step in front of her, and pulled the short girl into the most tightest embrace.
Haruna sniffed the girl's hair deeply, inhaling the same sweet and addicting scent of Yuko, feeling her eyes brimming with tears of joy and happiness as she was grateful that this wasn't a dream. That in this moment, she was holding onto the body of the girl she adore for so long. And she let the tears stream down her face as she felt the other girl's arm wrapping themselves around her with the same strength and passion.
Yuko chuckled. Her eyes didn't show signs of tears, because she knew she was going to meet with Haruna tonight. Her instinct has been tingling the minute she stepped out of her apartment building, and when she found the tall girl standing in front of the restaurant they usually go to, she could only thank God for leading her into the arms of her love.
Pulling away from the hug, Yuko looked up to see the tears still streaming down Haruna's cheeks, her lips slightly quivering looking like she's going to breakdown again. Thinking fast, the shortest of the two wiped away the tears, smiling ever so lovingly at the girl in front of her.
"First meeting after a few months, and look at you. Crying and everything." Yuko said, her smiling growing wider each second.
Haruna ignored the girl's joke, looking at Yuko's eyes as she was already lost in the constellations hiding in them. "I missed you."
The straightforward statement made the squirrel-like girl's heart ache, causing her to lightly kiss Haruna's left cheek and silently caressing it.
"Me too. Now, let's go in, I know how both of us are probably starving by the time we're standing here for another half hour."
-
The dinner was longer than they expected, but neither of them complained at the duration because both of them had a wonderful time with one another. It wasn't awkward, though it never was when it comes to the two of them, as they knew they will never be awkward with each other until death set them apart. In conclusion, they never will have a single ounce of awkwardness in their relationship.
Haruna had a hard time believing whether or not this was reality, which Yuko simply laughed and told her that she's very much real and alive. At this time, Haruna never let her lips stop tilting sideways.
It has been months. Months of loneliness, despair and lost. They missed each other as if they never met for years, and then they were having dinner, chatting away with whatever comes in their minds. It seemed that both of them never changed on what they felt for each other. They know for sure that the both of them need each other as much as the next person does.
The term, 'time flies when you're having a good time' seemed to left a bad impression Haruna because it was the time for the both of them to part. Until she requested a sleepover at the last second. Yuko simply laughed, and said softly with her eyes gluing with the other girl's.
"I was waiting for you to say that." Yuko smiled. "Come on, Nyan Nyan. Let's go home."
Once they reached Haruna's apartment, the two girls immediately went to the owner's room and started changing into their sleepwear. Haruna insisted on letting Yuko borrow some of her clothes, since she thought the short girl looked cute in them. After changing, they turned off the light while letting the lamp on the desk next to the bed stay on, and crawled into bed.
Both of them was tired, and needed rest. But they couldn't shake off the fact that they both met at a coincidental place and time, which leads to Haruna holding Yuko in her arms lovingly like a fragile child, her chin laying on the crown of the short girl's head. They felt peaceful at the moment. They wished that time could slow down by itself, and let the night be longer than it was. But in reality, morning will awaken soon in a few hours, so they tried to enjoy each other's company while it lasts.
"Today was hand's down the best day of my life," Haruna whispered.
"I would be saying the same thing," Yuko said, chuckling. "But you beat me to it, so now I got nothing to say."
Haruna smiled. "That's good."
Silence engulfed them once again.
"Sing me a song, Yuu-chan."
Yuko smiled, letting her head sink into Haruna's chest, carefully listening to the girl's steady heartbeat. She took a deep breath before she start singing.
"Cause all of me, loves all of you. Love your curves and all your edges, all your perfect imperfections," Yuko softly sang, her voice travelling into Haruna's ears while they continued to lullaby her into deep slumber. She didn't want to sleep yet. She wanted to listen to Yuko's singing before dusk settles. Until both of them have to leave each other, and work again. But it was too hard for the girl to hold her drowsiness, as darkness started to consume her vision.
"Give your all to me, I give my all to you. You're my end and my beginning, even when I lose I'm winning." She effortlessly let herself drift into sleep, mentally apologizing to Yuko for not being able to stay awake.
"Cause I give you all, of me..." Yuko looked up, noticing the sleeping princess still holding her tightly even in her sleep. Smiling widely, she snuggled closer to the tall girl, sighing contently as she took in the moment in front of her.
"And you give me all, of you... Oh, oh..."
-
................................... :pleeease: speechless!!
it's got right through my feeling, i got the sorrow :fainted: oh my kojiyuu feelings......
but it turned to sweetness in the end, i squealed so much! :mon angel:
it felt so real, with yuko graduate and their less time to meet each other because of work..
i love how you portrait Haruna's feeling about Yuko :love:
thankyou so much for this story, arya-san.. awesome :twothumbs
waiting for more~~ hihihihi
-
Goodbye, My Lover
I know your fears, and you know mine. We had our doubts, but now we’re fine. And I love you, I swear that’s true. I cannot live without you.
:::
It could have been worse. She would be living in a life of no control and subconscious fears, but her courage and dedication succeeded on putting her into one of Japan’s finest universities. A day in a life of a college student doesn’t seem to be interesting, but Rena believed that her story wasn’t a dull fest. She kept it her head for quite some time, playing it over and over again like a videotape, and she never gets old of her own story.
Some people might call this story quite cliché and lack of originality, Rena once thought about it herself, but those words are from people who never felt what love was. Hardly people understand the girl’s self-called ‘sad story’, though the fact didn’t slip out of place as well. The chances of heartaches throughout the story is a fifty-fifty percent guarantee, so given that, warm tears would likely to form in Rena’s eyes again. Like she always would.
"Wouldn’t it be a total bummer if you don’t come to Mayu’s birthday party tonight?"
It was the middle of the second semester in one of Tokyo’s prestigious high school known in the last decade. The shivering cold of the winter season made many students wearing thick layered coats and jackets, inserting gloves into their hands as if the blood running through their veins has frozen. But as much as for the freezing temperature, Rena seemed to be unaffected by the current season’s intentions. For her, wearing her favorite sweater was already enough.
"Will there be a lot of people there?" Rena asked, seeing a trail of fog escaping her mouth as the pencil in her hand continued writing on her notebook, copying notes taken from her friend. She didn’t blame her slight drowsiness in class since it was the last one, so having a friend like Yuki having to write down notes from that class made her feel glad that there was someone who actually pay attention to two hours of Japanese History. And Rena knew how bad she was in memorizing dead people’s names.
"If I said yes, will you still come?" Yuki asked, hoping her friend would say the one word she was waiting for.
"Nope. But tell Mayu that I said happy birthday for her," Rena said, flashing a smile before she got up and putting her notebook inside her bag. "Want to go home together?"
"Nah, it’s alright, you go ahead. I have to wait for Mayu until she’s done with her comic book club," Yuki said, chuckling at the thought of how nerdy her girlfriend was.
"Gee, I thought the term ‘bros before hoes’ was true, but look at you. Waiting for your girl and all," Rena joked, laughing slightly as the other girl gave her one of her famous death glares.
"Don’t push it, Rena. I’m still older than you, so watch your words," Yuki said, trying to sound menacing as possible. "And for you information, Mayu isn’t a freaking whore. And she never will be."
“I was just kidding. Lighten up, Yukirin.” Rena said, lightly punching the girl’s arm. “All those tests and homework must have been making you stress, I believe.”
Yuki groaned. “You have no idea.” Her eyes darted towards the clock on the wall, showing the current time and realizing that she should head to the club room by now. “I gotta go. I’ll see you tomorrow, Rena-chan.” Smiling widely, she ran towards the door and ran out, her loud voice echoing throughout the hallway outside. “Think about what I asked earlier!”
Rena sighed, shaking her head as she made her way out of the classroom. Half carrying her bag slung over her shoulder, her mind wondered off thinking whether or not, she should stop by at Mayu’s birthday party which was held another from now. She doesn’t want to disappoint her own friend, but she knew a lot of people would be there and she wouldn’t like that.
She wasn’t good with the crowd. The feeling of her body being pressed up against another one’s body, invading her personal space was something she tended to stay away from.
A cough escaped her throat, shivering slightly as Rena looked up at the clouded sky, silently missing the presence of the sun. Five straight days, and she only sees the same thing every time her eyes look up. Winter was supposed to soon, and she couldn’t wait for it to be over. As much as she loved the season, she wouldn’t be able to take anymore of the freezing cold air. All she wanted to see was the sun shining down at her, feeling its warmth against her soft skin.
Rena checked her watch, the arrows indicating that it’s still too early to go home yet. Deciding to buy a warm drink from the nearest convenient store, she went inside and bought a cup of hot chocolate she got for herself. As she waited for the cashier to give her back her change, she glanced her eyes towards an unknown figure standing outside with her back facing Rena’s point of view.
Unusually, the person was wearing the exact same school uniform Rena wore, a thought came into her mind as she wondered if the girl, judging by the figure’s feminine appearance and long black wavy hair, was from the school Rena currently studied in.
Curiosity sparked up inside of the pale skinned girl. And so, she took her change and walked outside of the store.
Rena walked cautiously towards the girl, carefully not wanting to disturb the other person in front of her. Opening her mouth to speak, she only founf her voice gone as she noticed the half-finished cigarette caught between two fingers and the lips of the girl slowly taking a drag from the end of the cigar.
Her eyes grew wide as she realized that the girl was smoking, out in the open, the school uniform remained intact on her body. She could only stare at the girl in front of her eyes, blowing a trail of smoke out from her mouth.
"Isn’t it supposedly rude to stare at a complete stranger for more than five seconds?"
The voice of the girl shook Rena out of her daze, getting a grip of reality and looking at another direction to avoid any eye contact with the other person. “Um, I didn’t mean to stare at you like that… Sorry.”
As her eyes looked up, she didn’t expect the person to look back at her as well. Their eyes met, locked up in a short staring contest, as Rena observed the facial appearance of the stranger in front of her. In her mind, Rena never imagined someone as physically attractive as her.
The girl smiled. A sign of friendliness.
"It’s okay. I’m kind of getting used to the fact that people would be surprised if they ever saw me, a high school girl, having a smoke outside of the school area," The girl said, taking another drag before exhaling. "I never let it bother me, though. I let them judge as they want."
"And you’re not bothered by that?" Rena asked.
"No. Not at all." The girl smiled, throwing the finished cigarette into a trash bin nearby. "I’m Jurina, by the way. Sorry, I just realized that I have manners and meeting a school girl like you that caught me smoking made me forget about telling you my name."
Rena chuckled slightly at the girl’s sense of humor. “I’m Rena. Nice to meet you. I didn’t expect someone from my school to be out here when everyone is already home.”
"Oh, you recognized the uniform?" Jurina grinned "Well, I actually thought I’ve once saw you before. I believe you are the girl who spends her free time at school, in the library reading romance novels."
Rena eyes widened. “Wait, how do you know?”
Jurina laughed. “I’m right, am I? I often visit there to clear my head, keeping my mind sane from all the school work. Then I saw you, busy reading… What was it, Fifty Shades of Grey?”
"It’s a good book, okay? I don’t get why people think it’s disgusting!" Rena defended herself, feeling both of her cheeks starting to get warmer.
"Whoa, whoa. Calm down. I didn’t say it was disgusting. Or vulgar." Jurina added. "I don’t have problems with people who loves reading erotic romance novels in their abundant free time."
"I don’t…" Rena tried to say she wasn’t into anything erotic related, but she shook the dirty thought away and groaned. "See, now I’m having messed up thoughts because of you?"
"Hey, why me?" Jurina smirked. "Just speaking out the ugly truth."
"Yeah, well, the truth nowadays are always ugly." Rena took a sip of her hot chocolate before continuing. "Like how many couples are simultaneously cheating each other with other people, and once they found out, then voila. Break up happens."
Jurina raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t that a bit exaggerating?”
Rena thought about it for a moment, and shrugged. “I wouldn’t call it exaggerating if it was actually true.”
"Oh, so you have been cheating on someone lately?"
It took a large amount of willpower to not choke on her drink as Rena was cut off guard by the sudden conclusion. She looked at Jurina in disbelief. “What… No! Look, how did you even thought of that?”
Jurina shrugged. “Just guessing. So have you?”
Rena sighed, shaking her head. “No, I am not cheating on someone right now. I don’t even have a boyfriend, or girlfriend so what’s the point?”
Jurina nodded. “True. You’re not going home now?”
Rena looked down at her watch, showing her the current before diverting her attention back to Jurina. “Now that you’ve mention it, I should probably do that. What about you? Aren’t your parents going to wonder where in the world is their daughter right now?”
"Well, kind of." Jurina smiled. "So, I’ll see you tomorrow then?"
"We’ll see." Rena mirrored the girl’s action. "It was nice meeting with you, Jurina."
Jurina bowed her head slightly. “Ditto, Rena-chan.”
Rolling her eyes at the nickname, she walked off to the direction of her house while she contained her inner happiness that she would be able to meet the girl again.
-
"Why didn’t you come to the party, Rena?"
The cafeteria was filled with hungry students as the bell for lunch break rang off a few minutes ago, and nearly half of the school’s population were already gathered in the food hall, enjoying their lunch that were packed from home or bought from the cafeteria catering people. Usually, the loud voices of the students surrounded the place, and Rena only wanted to finish her food and get out of the crowded place as soon as possible.
Rena shrugged. “Had a lot of work to be done at home, and also helping my mom cook dinner last night. At least, I didn’t get wasted or turned up, or else I would have woken up with a God awful headache.”
Yuki groaned. “Don’t even mention it. I felt as if the world started shaking, and the next things I knew, I had my head stuck inside the toilet.”
Rena rolled her eyes. “Told you alcohol is bad for you.” She took a sip of her orange juice, and stood up from her seat. “I’m going to the library for awhile. This place is getting crowded by the minute.”
Receiving a nod from her friend since the latter was busy trying to tune down the explosions happening in her head, Rena quickly walked out of the cafeteria. Reminding herself to tell her friend that alcohol isn’t a good, and it might give you a horrible experience in the morning.
As she silently walked through numerous of hallways since the library was located too far from the cafeteria, her mind couldn’t stop recounting yesterday’s event. Meeting up with a fellow classmate outside of school isn’t rare and it happens quite a lot of time, the girl whom Rena met yesterday was oddly different. Especially when she saw Jurina smoking wide out of the open, it seemed bizarre for a girl like her to be taking into the dangerous life and doing what the so-called ‘cool kids’ are doing.
Then Rena realized she forgot to ask the girl’s age. She mentally face-palmed at her forgetfulness.
Too wrapped in her own thoughts, Rena didn’t noticed she was coming into a corner and felt her body colliding into someone.
"Oh, s-sorry, I didn’t…"
Rena looked up at the person she bumped into, only to fine a familiar grin appearing at the girl’s face.
"J-Jurina," Rena stuttered. "Fancy meeting you here."
"I would have said the same thing, but it looks like you beat me to it." Jurina chuckled. "Fancy meeting you here as well."
Rena laughed awkwardly. “So, um, where are you heading?”
"Oh, I was about to drop by the cafeteria for lunch, but I guess I’m not hungry anymore," Jurina said, smiling. "How about you? Where are you going?"
"To the library. The cafeteria’s a freaking madhouse, I couldn’t survive another minute in that place. I prefer a place where it’s peaceful and quiet," Rena said. "You want to come with?"
Jurina laughed at the other girl’s annoyance. “Well, since I have nothing else to do and my stomach’s not begging me for food, then sure. Why not?”
The two girls walked down the hallway side by side, keeping each other’s company as they continued to talk about anything. From what Rena gathered, Jurina was slightly younger than her, the age gap concluded to be a two year difference. She was quite surprised at first, considering how mature the younger girl looks but nowadays, appearance is just a facade covering up the true colors of someone. In this case, Jurina’s appearance made her seem like an older sister.
As Rena was more of a listener, she mostly listened to what Jurina was telling, whether if it’s recounting a funny story or lame jokes. Rena would only laugh, and give the girl short comments before reverting back to listening. It was in this way, that Rena can fully know the other girl’s personality when she’s with someone. In other words, someone whom she just met the day before.
Once the two finally made it to the library, Rena quickly found find both of them a place to sit and settled herself with a book she was currently into while Jurina silently listens to a playlist through her earphones. Her fingers tapped to the beat of the song against the table, feeling herself staring at the older girl whom was reading the novel in her hands intently, eyeballs going left and right indicating that she’s busy reading each and every word printed in the book.
Noticing the title of the book was written under a different language, Jurina raised an eyebrow and took off her left earphone. “You read English novels, too?”
"Hm? Oh, yeah." Rena smiled. "I’ve read some books that are in English, but most of them are in the bookshelf in my room. You should try reading them, they make you feel sophisticated."
Jurina chuckled. “Thanks, but no thanks. I’m good reading books in my own native language, but I’m not saying that I don’t know English. The language has millions of adjectives and nouns I can’t even remember from when learn it in class.”
"Then go buy a English to Japanese dictionary," Rena suggested, her eyes not leaving the book in hand.
"Too lazy."
"Find someone to tutor you."
"Waste of money."
"Have extra classes after school."
"I have tennis practice, also basketball."
Rena looked up at Jurina, realizing how stubborn the girl was when it comes to learning. Yet she still managed to be in the top ten. “How are you supposed to learn English if you keep being like this?”
Jurina tilted her head sideways. “Who said I wanted to learn English?”
Rena blinked a few times, and shook her head. “You know what, never mind. Forget that I even said anything.”
Jurina grinned. “You’re adorable.”
Rena scoffed. “Keep on flirting, and you might be the school’s playgirl,”
"I wasn’t trying to flirt. If I see someone who caught my attention through their looks, I would be straightforward and tell them how they look like. It’s kind of my human nature whenever I see attractive people," Jurina explained, waiting for a reaction from the other girl.
"So, you’re saying that I’m attractive?" Rena asked, raising an eyebrow as she looked at Jurina questionably.
"Positive," Jurina said.
Rena sighed, and revert back to her book. “You’re such a flirt.”
"Fine. If you don’t want to believe me, so be it. But mark my words," Jurina said, leaning herself forward towards Rena. "You’ll eventually fall in love with my good looks."
Rena looked up, and smirked. “I never said that you’re good looking.”
"You keep glancing at me from time to time, don’t even bother lying."
"I was glancing at someone who’s even more attractive than you."
"There’s only us here, and in the hallway."
"Well, what if I saw a pretty face passing by, and you didn’t even notice?"
"Well, I…" Jurina paused, trying to think of a comeback but her head didn’t come up with anything smarter. "Damn it."
"Ha," Rena smirked. "I win."
"You got lucky, that’s what." Jurina crossed her arms, narrowing her eyes as she admittedly lost to someone whom she met only from yesterday. She was about to add another smart comment, but it was cut off by the school bell.
"Well, I’d love to say and chat, but it’s class time," Rena said, standing up and putting the book back into its original place. "I guess I’ll see you later, then." Smiling down at the young girl seated in her chair, she made her way out of the library.
As Jurina stared at the older girl leaving, her hips swaying side to side confidently, the girl let out a chuckle and shook her head while she sat up from the seat, and beginning to walk her way to class.
-
The cold wind blew restlessly around the area, giving off goosebumps on her skin as she breathed in and out almost too raggedly. Her hand forming into fist, silently letting the pain running up on her arm and wrist. Biting her lip and eyes tightly closed, she let out a shaky sigh as the stinging decreased.
Her heartbeat slowed down into its normal rate, letting her fist form back into a hand. Taking in a deep breath of cold air, she stood up while pulling down her sleeve. Her hand wandered off into her pocket, taking out a pack of cigarettes that had been in there for several days without getting caught. She took one out of the five remaining cigars, put the pack back in her pocket and pulled out a lighter. She felt a moment of warmth as the lighter was lit, and as she took a drag of the cigar in between her fingers, she exhaled. A overwhelming sense of calmness surrounded her body.
Thinking that a certain someone would be waiting for her outside of school, particularly at the convenient store, she started to walk casually with one hand in her pocket and the other holding the cigar, taking her inestimable time taking in the environment around her.
She didn’t know how long she had been doing her routine. She never get hold of herself whenever she’s in a depressed state, seeing that the word ‘hurt’ never came to her mind until the incident happened. Since then, hurt had been in dictionary for quite a long time. But she wanted to stop. She really does. Though every time she tried to hold onto the urge, she would end up crying and spent hours in the same position, whether if it’s in her bedroom or somewhere else where no one can see her.
Either way, she knew that someday, she would have to stop her routine.
Her eyes caught upon the sight of a lonely girl standing in front of the convenient store, a cup of hot chocolate in her hand. She smiled, walking faster towards the oblivious girl until she was next to her, unaware of the latter’s presence.
"I see you’ve been waiting for me."
The girl turned around instantly, surprised at the sudden presence of the person she had been waiting for more than twenty minutes. Once she found out it was her, she narrowed her eyes.
"There you are. I’ve been standing here for the last fifteen-"
"Twenty minutes. We promised to meet up at four."
"Last twenty minutes," she said, glaring at the one who corrected her. "And you, out of all people, happen to be so tardy. Where have you been, Jurina? I tried to call you, but you wouldn’t pick up."
"Rena, calm down," Jurina said, taking a drag of her cigar and exhaled in the other direction. "Something came up, and I got a little over my time. My phone was dead, so I guess that’s why you couldn’t reach me."
Rena sighed. “You could have told me that, you know.”
"I’m sorry." Jurina smiled warmly. "I’ll try not to be late again."
"You better," Rena said, glaring at her once more. "Because if you make me wait for another twenty minutes-"
"Oh, would you look at the time. It’s getting late, so let’s go home like, right now," Jurina said, already walking down the street towards both of their houses. Shaking her head, Rena sighed as she caught up with the young girl.
"You’re lucky that I’m being nice to you."
"Aren’t you always being nice to me?" Jurina smirked.
Rena gave her a menacing glare. “Shut up.”
It was an agreement that every day after school has ended and the sports club finished practice, the two would meet up in the same place where they first met. It would often be the same; Rena buying hot chocolate for herself, while Jurina smoked. During the walk home, it was always the younger girl to start the conversation, but at times, Rena would talk about her friends or something she came across on in her life.
Each of the times they walk, Rena had a habit of glancing at Jurina to check if she was paying attention. The smoking girl never interrupted a single sentence coming from Rena, and vice versa. Jurina tried her best to laugh at Rena’s jokes, even though she thought they weren’t funny, while the older girl tried her best to hide the awkwardness as her friend kept taking drags of her cigar.
She never once had a friend that smoked. She always thought people who smoked had a troubled life, and that smoking was the only thing that can calm them down. But when she looked at Jurina, she never noticed a single ounce of pain in the girls eyes. She was always bright, and positive. There wasn’t a moment where Rena would caught her frown, or cry. Which was, in her opinion, strange.
"Okay, so you love books, right? You love them so much that you couldn’t live a single day without them. Right?" Jurina asked, finishing her cigar and throwing it somewhere out of Rena’s sight.
"You could say that. Not sure I would be that melodramatic, but I do love books. Why?" Rena inquired, taking a sip of her hot chocolate.
"So, I’ve been thinking a lot lately. Of what will I do in the future, and how am I going to live in a life full of success and happiness," Jurina explained. Rena nodded, signaling the girl to continue. "And I have finally decided. I want to be a writer."
"What?" Rene looked at her friend in disbelief. "I’m sorry, but I thought you’ve been in love with sports since you were little, and you come to conclusion and tell me that you want to be a writer?"
"Yes," Jurina said, raising an eyebrow.
"But why? You’ve been dedicated in sports for a long time, I don’t think giving up on it is such a good idea," Rena said, unsure of the girl’s decision.
Jurina smiled. “Why not? I’ve been doing the same thing for the past few years, achieving some success which technically are not for my own satisfaction. Sports is just a hobby, something I would do in my free time. It’s not something I would do for a living.” Jurina paused, turning her view towards Rena. “I want to do something different, something that can both make me happy and satisfied at the same time. I don’t want to do something other people told me to do.”
Rena looked at the other girl in astonishment, nearly forgetting that she was much more mature than her. Two months of spending time with Jurina, and she was still surprised at the high level of maturity the girl had. In those two months, she has learned a thing or two from her. Whether if it’s about life, or social related problems. Sometimes, even about death.
"How are you so sure that writing will make you happy?" Rena asked, curious about the girl’s answer.
"Because I know that you will read my stories. I know that if I ever become a famous writer, a book-person like you would definitely buy my books. No matter how bad they are," Jurina said, her lips tilting into smile. "Making you happy is already enough for me, Matsui Rena. Don’t you ever doubt on that."
A rush of blood ran through her cheeks, creating a bright red color on both sides of her face. Rena felt embarrassed by anyone in her life, especially if that embarrassment made her feel giddy inside. Jurina was the first to ever done that to her. And she liked it.
"You’re such a flirt," Rena said, hiding the blush on her cheeks but failed to do so, causing the other girl to laugh.
"I’ll take that as a compliment, so thank you," Jurina chuckled. An idea came up on her head, causing her to grab the other girl’s hand. "Let’s go to my house."
"Why?" Rena asked, surprised by the sudden hand holding.
"I wanted to show you something. Something I’ve never showed anyone to until now," Jurina said, her expression turned serious at the moment.
An unsure feeling settled upon Rena, wanting to know what was in the other girl’s mind. She looked into her eyes, trying to capture a glimpse of any emotion, but found it hard to do so. A sigh escaped from her lips. “Okay.”
-
It was the first time Rena stepped foot into Jurina’s house.
She never thought how comfortably quiet the place was the moment she took of her shoes, and walked towards the living room. Silence surrounded the room, the shuffles of their own foot was the only sound they heard. Jurina went upstairs to her bedroom in order to change her attire, coming down the stairs wearing a t-shirt and black sweat pants.
Secretly, Rena thought how cute the girl was.
Her eyes continued to admire her friend’s style of clothing at home her eyes came upon both of her arms. They were beautifully white, the skin looking as if it was soft.
That was until she noticed the scars and bruises in the left arm.
"Oh, my God," Rena whispered, standing up from the couch and walking towards the girl, grabbing her arm to see the awful sight right in front of her. "Jurina, what happened? What the hell did you do?"
Jurina chuckled. “I love it when you swear.”
"This isn’t the time to be funny, Jurina." Rena looked into her eyes filled with seriousness and worry. "Tell me what happened…"
She knew it was about time someone knew. Sighing deeply, Jurina let out a force smile before pulling Rena into the couch. “Let’s sit first. I’ll tell you all about it.”
Once they’ve sat down on the couch, Jurina felt her hand still intact with Rena’s so she tried to let go. But the moment she tried to move her hand away, the other girl’s grip tightened. By then, the younger girl thought there was no use fighting and let her hand be held in a warm embrace.
"Jurina…" Rena spoke softly. "Please tell me what happened."
Hearing her name being called, she turned her head to face Rena, the latter’s face filled with worried. Knowing that there was going back now, Jurina took a deep breath and forced a smile.
"I just wanted to say, I’m sorry. Because what I’ve been talking about my parents weren’t true, and I’ve been only lying to you for the past two months," Jurina explained. "They’re not busy, nor they are always out of the country doing their work. They never left me money at home, writing down little notes of their short departure. They never did any of those things. Because they’re already dead."
The grip in her hand loosened, feeling the widened eyes staring at her in shock. ”What?” Rena was left speechless, never thinking that her friend would lie about her own parents.
"It was the start of freshman high school. I had a troubled week with the new kids, and the amount of homework dues for the entire month. I didn’t know why, but there was a deep feeling in my gut when I was walking home and I didn’t know why it was there. So I ignored it, thinking it was nothing. Once I got home, I got a call from my uncle," Jurina paused. "He told me that they died in a car accident on the way to work. I asked him if he was joking, then he started yelling at me for thinking that it was a prank. After the phone call, I cried. I cried, and I cried until I grew tired of crying. The next day, I walked into school feeling like a completely different person, all of the happiness drained out of my body and I was left emotionless like a zombie."
Rena listened intently, immediately feeling bad at the times she tried to mention Jurina’s parents. But the girl took it easily, smiling while recounting stories about how they would often go to new places during the holidays, and how she loved them very much that she would do anything for them. She didn’t know if the stories were true, since Jurina admitted she had been lying about her parents for the past two months, but when she listened to the stories, they didn’t feel fake at all. In fact, they sounded sincere and nostalgic.
"Jurina…"
"My uncle took me in for a few months, then bought this place when he trusted me on living here on my own. Until now, he’s the one who’s been paying the school bill and buying me other things that would keep me living independently," Jurina smiled bitterly. "I once told him that he should stop burdening himself just from helping me, but he told me he doesn’t his niece to live a bittersweet life. So he, along with my aunt and the rest of my family, are the ones that had been looking out for me ever since. That’s when I started hurting myself."
Jurina looked down at the scars on her wrist and arm, gently caressing them as she felt nothing but rough skin. “I never had the intention to kill myself. I never wanted to end my life, even after all the shit that has happened. I just wanted to hurt myself,” Jurina chuckled. “Weird, isn’t it? But I like it. The stinging pain running up my arm is rather calming. It helps me through dark times, saving my mind from going insane. I even slit my own palm just to know how it feels.”
Rena could only watch and silently listened at the devastating story the younger girl was telling, a sense of deep loneliness and heartache longed in her words. As if the girl tried her best to hide her feelings for so long. Jurina suffered so much at such a young age, and Rena couldn’t help but show her sympathy at the girl.
Standing up from the couch, the older girl walked towards the kitchen while the younger girl noticed her. “What are you doing?”
"Where do you keep the knife?" Rena’s voice emitted from the kitchen, causing Jurina to wonder what was the other girl trying to do. Before she had the chance to say anything, she was cut off. "Found it!" Walking back into the room, Jurina’s heartbeat quickened as her eyes came upon the knife in Rena’s hand. She stood up, confused on the other girl’s antics until a hand forced her body back down to the couch.
Rena calmly sat down beside her, rolling her sleeve up as the knife’s tip glistened at the light shining from the window. Fear ran through her mind as she had second thoughts, but she knew it was already too late to back down.
"Rena… Rena, what are you…" Jurina’s voice trailed off as she saw the sharp object making contact upon the soft skin that belonged to Rena.
She bit her lower lip, closing both of her eyes when a stinging pain shot up from her wrist, the cold sharp metal slowly grazing on the skin. Tears formed in her eyes as the pain increased, feeling a warm fluid leaking out onto her hand. Slowly opening her eyes, her breathing hitched as the sight of a bleeding cut on her wrist bestowed upon her.
She knew that the pain will be temporary, but the cut would last forever. Looking at the palm of her hand, she remembered that Jurina once slit her palm when she wanted to know how it feels like. Curiosity took her over, and Rena found herself slitting her own palm in one quick movement.
She looked at Jurina, feeling as if she accomplished a great success, and was met with wide eyes and a shock-filled face. Rena saw the younger girl’s hand, revealing an old cut lying on the base of her palm. As she saw it, she took Jurina’s hand with her injured one and hold it in a tight embrace.
“You don’t need to feel the pain by yourself anymore,” Rena said, staring intently at Jurina’s eyes. “Because right now, we’re the same.”
Both of them didn’t know how long did they hold onto their staring contest.
Both of them didn’t noticed how they slowly leaned in. Until they felt their lips met one another.
The two girls never kissed anyone. They realized that love was something that they should experience later in life, and finding it in a very young age might ruined the true meaning behind the four-letter word. But when they kissed, they knew that this was the first time they touch their lips with someone else. People also said that there will be a spark when you kissed someone you love. For them, it was more than that. It’s something precious, life-changing. And also beautiful.
The kiss deepened, both of them longing for each other’s touches. Their tongue fought for dominance, as their hands wandered off to one another’s body. Rena moaned, feeling as if she was in cloud nine and wishing that Jurina was feeling the same thing she’s having. Thankfully, the younger girl did.
The innocent kiss turned into a passionate make-out session, enjoying the light touches and sensation between the lust-filled tongue embrace.
Rena didn’t know that she would be staying in the girl’s house a little bit longer than she thought.
:::
Graduation Day
“Rena, come on! Take a picture with us!”
“Yeah, I’ll be there in a sec,” Rena shouted back at her friends, looking at her uncle with a wide smile. “I think you should wait for a little while. We’ll have our special celebration at home later, I promise.”
“Ah, don’t hurry yourself,” her mother said. “Have fun with your friends first. And I remember someone saying that she wants to have a little alone time with her girlfriend.”
“Mom! I didn’t say that…” Rena said in denial, hiding the blush on her face which caused her mother to chuckle in amusement.
“I’m just kidding. Have fun, dear,” her mother said, giving her a kiss on the forehead. “Just call me if you need anything.”
“Will do,” Rena smiled. And with that, her mother left. Turning back towards her friends, she ran off into their direction. “Guys, wait for me!”
“Come on, we’re about to take a picture!” Yuki said, waving her hand up in the air signaling the girl to be quick while her other hand was holding onto Mayu’s. The cyborg smiled at the running girl, nodding her head as Rena finally arrived at them while the latter did the same with a warm smile.
“Stop smiling at each other, and get in the frame!” Yuki exclaimed, earning a chuckle from the two girls. Positioning themselves in front of the camera, they readied themselves as the timer was running backwards starting from the number five. As Rena finally decided to smile widely for the picture, she felt a pair of lips landing on her left cheek. And the camera captured at the perfect time.
“What the…” Rena turned her head towards the culprit, immediately narrowing her eyes when she saw who it was. “You are one sneaky little girl.”
“Well, I am sneaky, but I’m sure as hell I’m not little,” Jurina smirked. Her hands wrapped around the other girl’s waist, pulling her closer so that their faces were inches apart. “Hey.”
“Hey,” Rena said, feeling herself smiling like an idiot. “Come on, let’s go to the roof.”
“We’re not going to have sex up there, right?” Jurina asked, which earned her a hard slap in the arm.
“You and your dirty mind, of course we won’t,” Rena glared. “Isn’t it normal to spend some quality time with my lover?”
“Ah, I love it when you use that word,” Jurina smirked. “Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s go to the rooftop, then.”
The two of them disappeared from the sea of crowd, running hand in hand as they pass through hallways and classes that both had special memories in their hearts. Indeed, they will miss the school, but it’s not like they’re never going to come here again. They both knew that in life, you have to live on and leave what you’ve done in the past. School was just one step of becoming something more than a regular person.
And they believe, with the enough willpower and dedication, they will be what they had always wanted to be. A person with big dreams.
They finally reached the rooftop, breathing in the fresh air as both of them, still hand in hand, walked over towards the railing and looked down at the huge gathering of students and parents enjoying their time at the graduation ceremony.
Today was both a happy and sad time, partly because another step up in life will be made once all of the former high school students walked into the university stage and partly because they will go along in different paths and being far away from the friends they have made along the school year.
Rena sighed. She will missed everything about high school.
“Jurina.”
The latter turned her head towards the other girl, smiling slightly. “Yes?”
“Do you feel nostalgic all of a sudden?” Rena said, not looking up from the sight below them as she recounts the good and the bad days that happened during the school year.
Jurina chuckled. “Of course. Everyone feels like they will leave a part of themselves when they left high school. The final years of training to become who you are, like my dad once said. I actually believed at every word he said to me.” She looked down at the people below them, a growing sense of sadness made her took a deep breath and sighed. “I’m going to miss this freaking place.”
Rena laughed, turning her full body so that’s she facing Jurina and kissed the girl’s cheek.
“Thank you.”
Jurina turned her body as well, her smile widened as she let out a small chuckle. “For what?”
The older girl pulled her body closer to her lover, leaning in until her lips met Jurina’s. The kiss lasted not too long, but it was sweet and sincere, and their foreheads touched.
“For everything.”
-
It was quite funny how in the next two years, the girl still kept her promise in being a professional writer. In total, Rena had a total of two books both written by Jurina placed in her bookshelf.
In Rena’s opinion, the two books were amazing. One was romantic comedy, and the other was a crime mystery, both of which sparked her interest when she found them in the local bookstore near her apartment. Every day, she went home after taking classes at the university she applied into and spent the rest of her day reading Jurina’s book. And after she was done, she read the other book. When she was finished with the both of them, she returned back to studying. But she had been patiently waiting for a new book to be released.
Rena had already moved out of Nagoya a week after graduation, leaving her friends and memories in the place where she was born and raised. She made sure she would often visit her birthplace in the holidays, so that she wouldn’t feel homesick. But even though Christmas was a month away, her longing to come back home was killing her.
She missed Jurina. It has been two weeks since they last texted each other.
Knowing the girl’s current occupation was a writer, she knew the busy schedules the girl needs to attend and because of that, both of them couldn’t chat for a couple of days, or a week in maximum. Rena missed the girl very much that she prayed that the holidays would start soon, so that she could go back home and spend Christmas with her family, friends, and lover.
Fourteen days without communication bothered her. Jurina never took this long to be away at work.
As the thought of something bad might happen towards the girl, Rena couldn’t focus on her studies and slept late at night wondering what had happened that caused Jurina to be missing. She didn’t knew why, but a bad feeling in her stomach told her that she needs to come back to Nagoya as soon as possible.
Thinking it was just due to stress and homesickness, Rena shook the thought out of her mind. She didn’t want to have any negative thoughts in her mind, considering the amount of paper work needed to be done. She thought that she was just over-thinking too much.
Until she received a call from Mayu.
“Moshi moshi.”
“Rena? It’s me, Mayu.”
“Mayu-chan! It’s been so long, how are you? You don’t know how much I miss your voice right now!”
A chuckled was heard from the other line. “I miss you too, Rena. When are you coming home? Everyone’s waiting for you.”
“I’m not sure, I’ve been really busy lately with assignments and I couldn’t find a single free day. Hopefully, I’m coming home a week before Christmas.”
“Ah, that’s great,” Mayu said. “But, I think it’s best if you come here sooner.”
“Really? Why?”
There was a pause in the other line. “It’s something really important. Trust me, I think you should come here tomorrow. Just for awhile is fine.”
“Oh. Um, okay. Tomorrow’s a free day so I guess I could come.”
“Great. I’ll come pick you up in the train station then tomorrow. Tell me when are you going to arrive, okay?”
“Yes ma’am. I will. See you tomorrow.”
“Alrighty. See you, Rena-chan.”
Tomorrow came by quicker than usual, with Rena being overly-excited that she would come and visit Nagoya even if it’s just for awhile. She missed the place where she had spent the majority of her life at, she missed her parents, she missed her friends. It made her feel even more happy that she would get to visit Jurina. Ever since the last time they chat, Rena has longed for a text or call from the girl. Now, seeing that she would get to meet her face-to-face, was more than enough for her.
Her unconscious smile widened as she walked out of the train, in her hand was a small bag of luggage having nothing but a pair of sleeping clothes and bathroom utensils. She waited at the parking lot for awhile, until she saw the black Mercedes driving up in front of her. The owner of the car walked out of the vehicle, a smile plastered on her face.
“Is this a dream, or is that Matsui Rena I’m looking at in front of me?” Mayu joked, walking towards the taller girl and giving her a tight hug.
Rena giggled, returning the hug. “I miss you too, Mayu.” They pulled out of the embrace after a couple of seconds. “I’ve seen that you’ve grown taller now,”
“So I’ve heard,” Mayu chuckled. “Come on, I’ll put the bag in the back of the car.”
Once they had settled in the vehicle, Mayu started the car and both of them drove away from the train station. Rena’s eyes kept staring outside the windshield, memories of her birthplace flashed in her mind as a sense of nostalgia gave her a wide smile on her face.
“What’s with that smile on your face?” Mayu’s voice snapped her out of her trance. Rena turned her head, her smile never leaving her face
“I’m just glad that I’m home,” Rena said. “So, where are we going?”
A sad smile formed on the other girl’s lips.
“You’ll see.”
-
It was a short drive from the train station to the parking lot of a place Rena couldn’t quite recall, the moment she stepped out of the car, a gust of wind blew around the place making some leaves on the ground being taken away. The silence was eerie, as she only saw a few cars parked in the area. Confusion struck her as she had no idea what was she doing here.
“Hey. Are you coming?”
Rena turned her head towards the voice, seeing Mayu already a few feet away from the car. She nodded. “Yeah, I’m coming.”
When they first arrived at the entrance, Rena noticed that they were in a graveyard.
Questions filled the corners of her mind, silently wondering why in the world are they in a place where the deceased are taken care of. She didn’t ask out loud, as she only followed Mayu right behind her as they continued to walk through gravestone by gravestone in silence.
Rena halted her pace when she felt Mayu stopping in front of her. “Why did we stop?”
Mayu turned to her, a sad smile forming on her face as she let out a sigh. “Take a look.”
She pointed at the gravestone next to her feet, and my eyes followed to where they were pointing. Only to found herself widening her eyes, and covering her mouth with both hands as she saw who’s gravestone was it.
It was Jurina’s.
Time seemed to stop as she stared at the horrifying truth in front of her, the amount of shock was beyond what she had hoped for. She came to Nagoya because she wanted to meet her parents, her friends and the person she loved the most. She had her spirits up, hoping to finally meet Jurina after two years of separation, two years of loneliness, two years of longing. Only to find her hopes flushed down the drain, as she felt her eyes getting watery at the sight of her lover’s own grave.
Rena kneeled down beside the gravestone, feeling the rough texture of the stone in her hand as she stared at the girl’s name printed in bold letters, the date and year of her birth along with her death below it. The grave was covered by small petals of flowers, meaning that someone has been taking care of it ever since.
Rena stayed silent, her lips quivering as she was close to breaking down.
“She never told you, didn’t she?” Mayu’s voice rang through her ears, but Rena continued to be quiet. Mayu sighed. “One of her parents had lung cancer, and Jurina was unlucky enough to be passed on. Right after her parents died, she had a medical checkup and… the doctor said that she was positive.”
Rena quietly listened to Mayu’s story, her fingers gently caressing the gravestone.
“It didn’t take long after you moved to Tokyo that the cancer kicked in. Everyone, even you parents were really worried about her condition and took her to the hospital. She stayed there for more than a month, but was able to write two books during her critical state. That girl has always been stubborn as hell,” Mayu chuckled dryly.
“But the night before she died, she told me to give you this. It’s a letter, but she didn’t want me to read it. She wanted to be you to read it first, and then once you’re done, you can share it to me and everyone else.” Mayu took out a piece of folded paper, and extended it towards Rena. The latter looked at the paper, then slowly took it.
“I’ll be waiting in the car. Call me if you need anything, okay?” Mayu said, forcing a smile on her face as she patted her hand on Rena’s shoulder. Receiving no response from the other girl, she quietly walked away from the grave and leave Rena in her thoughts.
She looked down at the letter below, her hands slightly shaking due to the shock. She hesitated on opening it, but curiosity beat her to it and she found herself slowly opening the folded paper.
Her lips twitched that it was written Jurina’s own handwriting.
It didn’t take long before she started kneel down on the grave, silently crying her heart out with the crumbled paper in her hand as she realized that the girl she fell in love with, the girl stopped her habit for smoking, was gone.
-
Dear Rena,
I know that this is kind of old-fashioned, but the doctor wouldn’t let me call you even though I desperately need to. So, I’m giving this to Mayu so that she can give it to you.
I’m really, really sorry.
I wish that I could see your face again, hear your adorable laugh and spend most of my short time being with you as the clock of death inevitably awaits me to deliver me to the heavens above. This stupid illness isn’t anyone’s fault, not even yours or mine. It’s life, and sometimes, we don’t always get what you want.
I love you. I really love you. You don’t know how hard it is to not think of you every night, picturing your smiling face in front of me, feeling the warmth of your embrace. I’m forever sad that you are not home anymore, and now residing in Tokyo. But you chased you dream, and I’m proud of you. I love the times we had together, even if they were short. But I want you to know that, even though I’m not in this world anymore, I don’t want you to forget about me. You’re my first love. Please don’t ever try to forget about me.
Matsui Rena, I hope you have a good life. I will see you soon. If not, maybe fifty years from now.
‘You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I can’t tell you how grateful I am for our little infinity.’
Love,
Jurina
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It was freaking sad!
But the smoking Jurina sounded cool, hot, badass B-)
As expected from you, great story as always Machdi-san (∩_∩)
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oh!! I don´t read these last two stories. I like it!!!
Plis don´t forget to update : Creaks at Night
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Gooooooood
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Omg shuch a sad story~~~
I love how you tell the story....great grammar? XD
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OMG ALL THESE BAND SONGS james dean and audrey hepburn, sorry by sws. Intoxicated by the cab, ever enough and like we used to by arttm, I LOVED IT also the os with the script songs. Your One shots are mostly sad tho PLEASE WRITE MORE OS RELATED TO BAND SONGS (LIKE MAYDAY PARADE SONGS LOL) :bow:
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really liked your atsumina fic !