Sorry I haven't posted in a while, I've been having trouble coming up with newer ideas, but...
Here's my new oneshot! It has two parts so I'm not really sure if it's a oneshot or twoshot. This took me forever to write, it's probably the longest one I've written up 'till now. The idea sounded really interesting to me.
Well anyway, here it is!
Because I love you: Part 1Friday. April, 9th. 3:30 amI ran through the city streets as fast I could, my feet making loud pattering sounds as it pounded against the ground causing water to splash over to different areas of the pavement. My toes began to freeze from the lack of protection it had since I had left my shoes back at the dance studio. If I continued like this I would think that they would fall off any minute. My clothes were soaked from head to toe, my white blouse far from being called damp. I breathed hard, my chest going up and down making small wheezing sounds. The rain was really cold, and running with my back wet didn't help any further. The supposed police sirens I had been hearing in my head had been repeating themselves over and over again. I lay back against the brick wall of the alley I found shelter in, and held my head trying to figure what I had just done. My heart began to beat incredibly fast, allowing me to actually hear the sounds of my heartbeat clearly surging throughout my body.
"They'll find out about this for sure... what I did was... stupid, beyond stupid." I couldn't find a better word than that at the moment, my mind just went completely blank, and my selection of vocabulary became unavailable. Scenes of what happened back at the studio continually replayed themselves in my head. No matter how many times I would try and shake them off, they would reappear, tormenting me, haunting me.
People do crazy things for love, but what I did was far from being called crazy. I can never look Eri or any of the members in the face ever again, or anyone for that matter. What I did was unforgiveable.
With my back still on the brick wall, I collapsed onto the pavement landing on my bottom in a sitting postion, with my knees bent and pointing upwards. The rain continued to wet my body, and I embraced it all, somehow it comforted my nerves and hid the tears I shed.
"Is the weather always like this when someone has passed away?"- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Monday. April, 6th. 10:37 amGreat, another day where I have to see Gaki and Eri getting all lovey-dovey, they're not even dating but that sure is the aura they give off. I sighed and crossed the street, making my way over to the radio station. Why did I have to get paired up with Eri when Gaki is there? Couldn't it have just been me and Eri? What's so hard about that? Does the manager have a hard time writing "Kamei Eri" WITHOUT putting "Niigaki Risa" as guests for any show? It's like he has some incurable disease called "Gakikameosis" or something.
It's been ages since me and Eri have actually been together for anything, it kind of pisses me off. "Gaki this!" and "Gaki that!" ughh, I'm kind of getting tired hearing about freakin' Gaki. Why can't you ever pay attention to me...
"What the hell Eri, don't say hello to random people you don't even know."
"Ehh~.... YAAAYYY!"
"Don't go 'Yay!' for no reason!"
Those voices! Great just what I needed right before work, someone flirting non-stop with the girl I love. Well, I'll be seeing more of this anyway, no reason to avoid it. I walked up to them and gave them an unenthusiastic 'good morning'. You could practically see the dark clouds forming around me.
"Ohayo..."
"Reina! I called you yesterday to see if you wanted to go to the station together with me and Gaki-san but it seems like you didn't pick up." I knew she was gonna say that, that's why I didn't even bother picking up my phone yesterday.
"Hey are you listening to me? Lately reina its like you've been avoiding me." Really, I was the one avoiding you? Well if you would unlock your damn arms from Gaki's then we'd probably get the chance to talk.
"Reina..."
All of a sudden I felt something being laid upon my shoulder it was Eri's head, and she had her arm around mine. I immediately felt my face heat up and my heart started to beat incredibly fast.
"...Do you.. hate... me?" She looked up at me, pouting with her chin on my shoulder. I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks and my eyebrows twitching in reaction to how cute she was being. If she keeps staring at me like that I'll-
"SO... why didn't you pick up the phone?"
"UWAHH!" I jumped to the side, the sudden motion throwing Eri off balance. Out of nowhere Gaki put her head in between Eri's and mine. Her eyes looked as if they were about to pop out of her head! Hell that scared the crap out of me! Is she trying to...? I get it now. In a moment expect an unwanted sub-leader pulling Eri to her other side so that no contact will be made.
In a few moments as Eri was busy regaining her balance, Gaki yanked her over to her other side, causing Eri to almost fall on her back. Now she was in the middle of the three of us. Greeaat...
Frowning, I remained silent and distanced myself away from them, my hands in my pockets. I stopped walking, allowing the two to go ahead of me. I wouldn't want to get in the way between them. It's like they say, three is a crowd. As I watched them walk further on, Eri turned her head around and looked at me worriedly. She opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out. I smiled back at her to reassure her that I was fine, when in reality I wasn't.
...
Is she still looking?
...
"WHY IS IT ALWAYS LIKE THIS!!" I kicked an invisible figure in front of me and I flailed my arms around, causing people walking by to give me strange looks. "WHY WON'T YOU EVER PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!" One of the nearby trashcans flew up into the air and landed on a poor unsuspecting victim, allowing all the garbage within the container to scatter into several places. This will definately be in the papers tomorrow.
"HOW COME SHE'S ALWAYS TAKING YOU AWAY?!" After a flurry of wild kicks and punches aimed at nothing, I stopped to catch my breath, making small puffs in the cold air.
"Wh-why, don't I have the guts to do something about it?" I-I'm a wimp. I just realized how wimpy I was being lately. All this time I've been putting up a "strong girl" front, yet when it comes to her. All my strength...
vanishes.
I can't even gather up the strength to tell her how I feel. Reina you're such a loser. I blame Gaki for the distance between me and Eri, but really it's my fault for not even doing anything about it. I'm pathetic... Starting from today, you're definately gonna try harder.
"Thats it. I'm definately not giving up, one day we'll be together, I swear on it. I'll do whatever it takes. For real this time. It's on." With my newfound resolve, I walked on forward dusting myself off and pretending like nothing happened. I marched on and held my head high.
During the whole segment, Gaki and Eri did most of the talking. I remained quiet forcing myself to put on my best smile so as not to worry Eri. I guess it didn't work though since she kept looking back at me the whole time, a worried expression on her face. I didn't talk all that much and that really is a cause for worry, since I'm known for talking a lot. A moment ago I said I would do my best, but what happened?
As soon as the recording was done I rushed out towards the exit, but I couldn't leave first. I was the last one to leave since one of the hosts were asking me tons of questions about what was wrong with me during the session and on top of that she gave me a lecture about how if my mood seems even the slightest bit off the listeners can point it out. Who did she think she was? She only got the job yesterday, and its her first time working as a host on a radio show, so she shouldn't be lecturing me about stuff I already know. I cut her off in the middle of her lecture with a simple "Yeah, whatever." and hurriedly went to look for Eri. She's not going home with Gaki this time.
I went up and down the hallway outside the recording room, and checked to see if she was in any vacant rooms. I even went into the washroom to look for her. Releasing a heavy sigh, I slumped my shoulders and made my way to the elevator. Guess she went with Gaki huh? Wait! I took out my cellphone and pressed the speed dial number for Eri's phone. I'll just ask where she is and tell her to wait for me! I'm so smart.
...
Hey, this song is pretty catchy, guess elevator music isn't all that bad. Engulfed with the current tune, I didn't notice how long I had been waiting for Eri to pick up.
Okay... I've been waiting for a pretty long time, why isn't she picking up? I closed my cellphone and gave up on trying to call Eri. I sratched my head in an irritated manner and released a loud grunt of annoyance. This is really making me frustrated.
The elevator made a loud "ding!" indicating that I was at my floor, and I stepped out. Huh? Where is everyone? There were tons of people here when I first came in a while ago.
"N-no...S-stop, people will see us here."
Wh-what the heck!! It sounds like someone is doing something dirty! All those heavy breathing sounds and light groans! ick! it makes me sick how some people are so indecent. Even though there
seems to be no one in the hallways right now it doesn't mean you can just do whatever you want. Continuing to walk up the hallway, I noticed that the strange sounds continued to grow louder and louder, though I didn't see anyone in front of me, but rather it was to the side? As the volume of the voices increased with each step, so did my recognition of the two voices. Slowly creeping up the hallway to hear where it was coming from I finally stopped. This was the loudest point in which I could hear the voices. My eyes grew bigger and my eyebrows furrowed in shock. Isn't that Eri and Gaki?!
I've failed. I've officially failed and all my chances with Eri are gone. I may as well surrender to Gaki right now.
"Oi."
"Reina! I-its not!"
They broke apart from their kiss, but Gaki was so occupied with their little activity that she barely wanted to turn her head around, while Eri on the other hand responded immediately with a shocked look on her face. Waiting for the other girl to respond, I stood there saying nothing and analyzed their appearances. Eri's shirt was unbuttoned almost halfway down her blouse, and her skirt was lifted up since, well... Gaki's hand was there. Reaction Queen here on the flip side was untouched, her outfit looked fine, except for the few wrinkles her shirt had since... Eri was grabbing onto it. I stared at the both of them disgustingly. I looked at Eri, my eyes practically giving away how hurt I looked, but then I quickly averted them.
Now Risa is just going even further, she's even diving all the way down Eri's neck! What a pervert. I'm not waiting any more. I grabbed their hands and put them on top of each other.
"Here. I give up." And with that I calmly walked towards the exit, my head still held up high. Don't cry now Reina, don't cry now. Thats what I tried to tell myself, but no matter how hard I tried the salty fluid ran down my face anyway. I didn't bother wiping away the tears on my face. I bit my lower lip to contain myself from sobbing loudly. I paused for a few moments once I reached the exit doors, and tried to calm myself down. After that I pushed open the doors open, walking out of the station. When people say that their heart actually hurts, they're not joking, it feels like getting stabbed right there.
Thursday. April, 8th. 10:02 pm"And a, one, two, three, four! and a, one- No, no Reina your timing is off! Everyone, your concert starts in three days and yet you don't have this dance down yet?!" Our dance instructor became extremely frustrated with us, or should I say me, at this point. We've redone this part over and over again, yet I keep messing up. This doesn't happen a lot. Usually I have all the steps memorized by this time.
"Alright, everyone. Let's take a fifteen minute break and hopefully Reina's memory will jog again. I'm kind of tired as well. We've been here for a while now." She didn't have to pick me out specifically, I'm sure everyone knows it's my fault.
"Reina, can I see you for a minute?" I nodded my head and made my way over. I'm sure she has a lot to say to me.
"What's wrong with you? By now you're fine. Is there anything on your mind?" I could say no, but that would be a lie. There was that incident from Monday. I guess I haven't quite gotten over it, and seeing the two of them together still hurts. I couldn't really dance all that well either since the both of them were right in front of me, and remembering what happened makes me feel awkward.
"No. What would make you think that?" I firmly said my response and walked off. If I didn't leave right there she'd dig even deeper into my response and I don't want that.
"Reina, come on, let's go out to eat together! Hurry up, our break isn't that long!" I heard Sayu's voice down the hallway. I'm really hungry, maybe food will take my mind off of things. I want some meat, meat is always good in times like this. I turned the corner, and while stretching my arms out I yawned. I didn't get any sleep last night either, which is bad since I'll get eye bags. I scratched my eyes while walking up to Sayu. I opened one eye with my arm all the way up in the air since I was still stretching.
But instead of just Sayu, I saw Eri there as well, hiding behind Sayu fidgeting. I began to feel my heart rate pump up. My brain urged my feet to turn back, yet they wouldn't listen. This is bad really bad, hurry and think of some sort of excuse! Once I got to where Sayu was standing I turned back right away. Walk, keep walking, maybe she won't notice anything and ignore it. Marching back to the dance room, I felt someone grab my shirt and yank me backwards.
"Where are you going? I thought you came up here to go eat with us."
"Umm..." My eyes went back between Eri and Sayu. Eri was still fidgeting and staring down at the floor, while Sayu had her hands on her hips and was puffing up her cheeks while looking at me angrily. I then thought of an excuse, it was pretty lame but worth the try. "I thought I should get more practice, I didn't do a very good job today."
"YOU? more PRACTICE? What happened to all those comments? like 'that old hag. no wonder she can't get a boyfriend, who would want to date a girl who nags you all day long.' You were always the first one to run out the doors during break time. If you go back there she'll be waiting to nag you again."
"A-ahh well she isn't so bad." I turned around and ran back. If I can't stand even being near Eri how am I possibly going to be able to go and eat with her? It's impossible right now, really impossible."
"Reina!" Are you serious?? She's actually chasing me! I thought she hated physical activities of any sort! There's the door! I turned the knob and ... closed it again. Gaki that musume of a bastard... First Eri and now Ai-chan.
"Reina!!" I grabbed sayu and put my hand over her mouth. "Be quiet for a minute." Sayu began to make muffled sounds under my mouth which only began to grow in volume because she was confused. "Shut up for a minute." I quietly whispered to her, and she shut up. At least she's obedient.
Through the small window the door had, I peeked through and looked at what the both of them were doing. Gaki was sitting on one of the chairs in the room and had Ai-chan on top of her, her legs wrapped around her body. She's actually taking Ai-chan's shirt off!! and then her bra and... WHAT IS SHE DOING NOW?! That two timing bitch. I actually gave Eri up because I thought it was pointless, but here you go playing with other girls! You're not getting away with this. Just wait after dance practice. You're dead.
As the rest of the practice progressed, I executed every move perfectly. I wanted dance practice to be quickly done and for that to happen I needed to do my best. I can't wait to get my hands on her.
"Okay everyone, that's it for today! Amazing work Reina! That was really unexpected."
"Thank you." I did a quick bow and went to fetch my things. I quickly got changed and was thankfully fast enough to avoid Junjun's random ass slaps. That women is a maniac in the dressing room I tell you. I leaned back on the wall outside of the rehearsal room and waited for Gaki, she was always the last one out since she always did some extra practice. In a few moments she came out with a towel around her neck, drinking a bottle of water.
"Tanakacchi, do you need something?"
I took her arm and dragged her all the way back into the rehearsal room. We're gonna have a really long talk and it would be rude for everyone to have to hear my voice pierce through their ears.
"Ouch! You're holding my arm too roughly!" I let go, her arm swinging from side to side once I did.
"I saw you getting pretty comfortable with Ai-chan in the rehearsal studio during break time."
"Huh? what are you talking about? We didn't do anything during break ti-"
In less than a second I closed the distance between me and her, and grabbed the neckline of her green shirt, pulling her face up closer to mine. "Don't play shit with me. I know you're just leading Eri on." I unleashed the best glare my face could possibly create. If I continue to stare at Gaki for this long she'd have holes in her face. She chuckled a little, as if she was mocking me and at the same time congratulating herself for keeping her secret up for this long. She's a sick bastard isn't she.
"I guess you've found me out. What? You're getting jealous cause' I'm taking away you're precious Eri?" My grip on her shirt loosened and eventually I had let go. She dusted herself off and stared at me, smirking.
I remained silent, my breath coming out of my nose heavily in anger. What she said was true and if I countered that statement it would make me look like a stubborn idiot, well I am, but in this situation I especially don't want a person like Gaki scolding me when I should be the one scolding her by giving her a good ass kicking. She laughed at seeing how she was in fact correct, and I remained silent, but the next words that came out of her mouth was not enough to retain me.
"Don't worry as soon as I'm done with her you can have her. She wasn't that amusing anyway. Tell me, what's so good about her?" My anger began to rise and I clenched my fists trying to retain myself. I don't care if she were to bad mouth me or anyone else, but to bad mouth Eri is a different thing. I clenched my fists harder and harder with each word that she spoke. "She's just a big idiot that can't do anything right. You have such bad taste in girls. Don't worry you'll get her back once I'm done with her tonight. That's the only thing she's good for anyway. Ai-chan and Eri, they're the same." "That's it!
I dug my fist right into her face creating a red mark on her cheek and a cut on her lower lip. She staggered backwards, and eventually fell to the ground holding her jaw. I wasn't done with her yet though. I picked her back up and jammed my fist into her face once more. I pinned her down and got on top of her, giving her a few more punches repeatedly in the same area. "Don't. Fucking. say. that. about. ERI!!!" Letting go of her shirt, I wiped off some of the sweat forming on my face with my arm. I breathed hard, releasing all the anger within me.
"Y-you had no chance with her to begin with. She fell for me remember? And now I can do with her what I please." She propped herself up with struggle using her right arm and whispered in my ear, a sly smile on her face.
"And right now. I want her in bed... n-a-k-e-d.
Naked." I picked her up, and jabbed my clenched hand into her stomach, sending her almost flying towards the mirrors in the studio. The mirrors cracked in response to the force which Gaki's body made when she hit the glass. I walked hurriedly towards her as she was busy regaining her balance, and took her by the head, smashing it against a nearby wall. I turned her around and kicked her back sending her to the ground. I stepped on her face and pushed my foot further so that her head would be squished between the floor and my foot. I had no sense of what I was doing anymore, my rage had controlled me and before I knew it I had punched Gaki in the face so many times, that it was impossible to know it was her. The blood gushed from all parts of her face, and various sizes of cuts could be found on her forehead, cheeks and lips. Her hair was all messed up and her clothes were extremely wrinkled with some of my footprints on it.
Calming down, I looked back at Gaki and felt satisfied, but what I expected next was enough for me to wish that it was me in her place.
After staring at her for a long time, I noticed it didn't seem she was breathing.
"What did I do?" Panicking, I checked her pulse just to make sure I wasn't over reacting. After ten seconds, I recieved no pulse. There's no doubt about it s-she's... dead.
"I-I didn't mean for it to be like this!" Leaning on both my arms hovering over Gaki, I sobbed. "Why?! Why didn't you fight back!?" I wanted to teach you a lesson... t-this, this isn't how I wanted it to end!
"Come back... Come back... DAMN IT RISA!! DON'T GO!"
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Friday. April, 9th. 8:05 amThe sun peeked through the shutters and shone on my face causing me to scrunch up my eyebrows. Putting my arm over my eyes so that the sun's rays would be blocked out, I slowly opened my eyes and noticed that I wasn't in the alley where I had fallen asleep anymore. I became alert and prepared to defend myself. In the midst of my preparation, I coughed and brang the snot coming out of my nose back in by breathing in air through my nostrils. My head felt dizzy and my neck felt hot. I breathed heavily although I didn't do any strenous work at all. Did I just get a cold? If I do die of a cold I wouldn't mind it. I remembered what I had done yesterday and thought it wouldn't be so bad if I died right here, either by the kidnapper or by this cold. I did deserve it afterall. Although I think someone has kidnapped me, this place seems extremely familiar. The piles of dirty clothes scattered around the room, the dirty socks hanging from the random places in the ceilings and the opened drawers and closet doors- I know them all too well, this is-
"Reina! You're awake! Here eat this I made it!"
Eri's house.
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