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^ The theme song will be released as a single  :twothumbs --> http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=41928.0
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Watanabe Mayu's 6th solo single has been announced!  :jphip:

It's called 守ってあげたくなる "Mamotte Agetakunaru" and is the theme song for her upcoming drama 「サヨナラ、えなりくん」 "Sayonara, Enari-kun".

The drama starts of 4/30, no word on single release date yet.



http://natalie.mu/music/news/230811
https://mantan-web.jp/2017/04/29/20170428dog00m200027000c.html
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Well, hello~ :3

Cool that you made an account here so people can read your works on this site. :D

Anyways, I can't wait for Spellbound! Keep up the good work! ^_^d
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It's that time of the year again


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BLUE ROSE REBELLION: 01 (Fiction)


MainCharacters: Matsui Jurina, Matsui Rena (WMatsui).

Summary: It was a time for change. In their hearts they knew, they were not merely grains of sand crushed beneath the wheels of fate. Rena and Jurina swore to their souls that the dysfunctional regime controlling their lives would soon end as the blue roses bloomed in battlefield.



xxxx

忘れてよ

Forget
青いバラなんて

What a Blue flower
夢か幻

Is it a dream or an illusion?
奇跡なんて

What a miracle
起きてないわ

I’m not waking up

Blue rose

忘れてよ

Forget
私のことを
That you
愛したのは

Loved me
一瞬の本能の迷い

A confusion of a moment’s instinct[[MORE]]

The blaring sirens resonated in the vast expanse of the walled city, almost mimicking a cry from some strangled animal. The noise was a reminder of captivity, of authority, of the desolation they tried to escape.Simultaneously, iron bars descended upon the windows and doors of each gray concrete building in the metropolis, stripping away the whole population's freedom.

“By decree of theSupreme Commander, the public execution of the rebel leader caught for the Black Friday Riot will take place at 0900 hours 2 days from now. All citizens are mandated to attend the occasion at the CitySquare or watch the live broadcast available in all channels. May this serve as a reminder that every single person abetting or associating himself with the Blue Rose Rebellion shall be dealt with unforgiving retribution.” The announcement was transmitted to all frequencies, through every kind of media and communication line. “All hail Utopia!”

Utopia, it was the name the Supreme Commander gave to his twisted regime—a promise of paradise, how rightfully ironic.

The procession of armed men in grey uniform raised their left arms, hands curling into fists.“All hail Utopia!” They chanted with blind loyalty.

“Sift the streets of rogue vermin tonight, every head you give is a rank higher than what you carry!” The chief constabulary officer ordered with cold abandon.“You hear me?!” He bellowed.

“Yes Sir!” Came a chorus response. “All hail Utopia! All Hail the Supreme Commander!”The men proclaimed before finally dispersing for the night’s bounty hunt.

The curfew came like a harbinger of shadows after the sunset; this was the routine the people had grown accustomed with like the precision of mindless clockwork. Only the dictator’s enforcers lurked in the night, their high-powered weapons emboldened as they surveyed the surroundings.The fate of those caught was uncertain; deviants were incarcerated for life or executed depending on the tyrant’s notion of‘benevolence.’

Despite the state of desperation that engulfed the people, there were still those who kept their fortitude—the Blue Rose Rebellion. The members of the resistance were insurgent phantoms, scheming webs of intrigues and destabilization plots to depose Utopia’s dictator.

A small light burned in their hearts, the longing for liberation.

Before the hands of the massive clock tower beside the City hall could even strike six, a deafening sound exploded from below it.Even after the blast its till stood as rubbles of concrete from the damaged western wall scattered about the fine architecture.

A commotion followed as patrolmen coming from different directions started to gather.

From afar, a woman clad in a black trench coat peeked at the blinds on her window, observing the streets with a calculating gaze. Long black hair framed her porcelain face delicately; her doll-like features complimented her lithe built. “That has to be one of our implants.” She murmured almost in a whisper, brown eyes glistening. The other occupant of the room turned to her anticipative of some sort.

“To actually plan an ambush at the heart of the Capitol, what are you thinking Rena?”Another girl, much taller inquired; the placid tone of voice and detached demeanor barely gave away anything about her. For a woman though, she had a distinct boyish appearance.

“She’s here, Sae. I know she’s here.” There was absolute certainty in Rena’s words.Every fiber of her being screamed with anticipation, she would not permit herself to watch idly at the turn of events, especially while knowing that the person she cared for the most was being held captive. “And I’m letting them know that we’re coming for her.”

As the Captain of theFrontier team, the Resistance’s most skilled pool of fighters, Rena was supposed to be the most rational out of all. Sae had expected more objectivity and less recklessness from the seasoned fighter, or at least a level of personal detachment. “You’re gambling your whole team in this suicide mission for the sake of just one person,you’re letting your emotions get the best of you again.”

There was something that snapped in Rena’s mind, exasperation clashed inside her like torrential rain.She callously pulled Sae by the collar so they were now face to face. Her eyes burned with nameless defiance.“The person you’re suggesting we abandon is the only reason why we’reall still alive.” She hissed as if the venom in her words could burn.

Sae gave her an equally piercing gaze. “This is war. Casualties are casualties, we can only move forward thanks to some sacrifices.” Sae was aware of the deep relationship Rena shared with their missing comrade. She would belying if she said she didn’t feel the urgency to save the girl whose existence started this whole renaissance. But to waltz straight into the lion's den, it was madness! The Capitol's Special DefenseSquad(SDS) was waiting for them and there was nothing more foolish than to meet head-on an onslaught of bullets.

“There is no room for selfishness Captain. Remember our goal, we have all welcomed death the moment we joined the Resistance.” Sae stressed Rena's rank, hoping the weight of responsibility attached to it would compel the stubborn woman to reconsider. “She is no different.”

Sae gazed at her, there was pain in her eyes, but beyond it was the fortress of duty that should never be breached. Deep inside Rena, she understood Sae’s unwavering heart and part of her was thankful the other Captain stood steadfastly for both of them. But she couldn’t give up on thatperson without a fight.

The words drove deeper the imaginary knife on Rena’s chest. “No. I’m not leaving Jurina to die.” Let her display of favoritism be damned, let her reputation be stained with prejudice but she was not to surrender even the slightest sliver of hope for a reunion. "I'm going to save her, even if it means taking down the Capitol by myself."Her grip on Sae's clothing eased as she noticed the Blue Rose insignia pinned on Sae’s left collar, the same was pinned in her own uniform.

Blue like the limitless sky. The enigmatic flower was a symbol of their dreams—their grievances, their passion and their freedom. Rena stepped back to disconnect herself, tearing off her own floral badge. She handed it to Sae as she motioned to leave; it was an unspoken promise between them.

We will come back.

Sae watched as Rena made way for the door, she knew the woman's resolve could no longer be daunted. Her gaze followed the Captain as she disappeared into the shadows of the corridor, a tide of conflicting emotions clouding Sae’s own judgment as she studied the flower pin in her palm. “Keep yourself grounded, Sae.” She whispered.

It only took a few seconds before the mahogany door reopened. Sae greeted the person who quietly entered the room with a deep bow. Despite her small stature,an air of authority emanated from the newcomer. “General Takahashi,Captain Matsui is moving out.” Sae stood motionless for a fews econds as she saw three more figures enter the room, tailing behind Takahashi.

The ex-general of theSpecial Defense Squad and the Resistance’s current leader,Takahashi Minami, sighed deeply as she walked in. The three who entered made way for the round table and sat together. The General shook her head, she had crossed paths with the said Captain on the latter’s way out. "We all expected this." She muttered calmly while her three companions remained silent.

"You're not stoppingher? We’re on the brink of losing one of our most talented fighters and she’s taking Frontier with her."

Takahashi did not answer;instead she gave her own inquiry, “Sae, do you know ProjectMonarch?”

Sae's heartbeat quickened at the mention of the highly confidential military program that had spawned human weapons for the past decade. “Of course I do... it was supposed to be Utopia's last trump card.” Project Monarch was the most controversial military scandal that never reached conclusion. The training camp was razed to the ground and every person connected to the project was assassinated.

Biological warfare and mind control was the heart of Project Monarch. A virus was implanted into the nervous system of the test subject and only a fractional percentage survived the procedure. But those who did gained unbounded power. Immersed in inhumane conditions, chosen people were mutated and conditioned to become elite soldiers for the sole purpose of carrying out the Supreme Commander's bidding.

“A myth, nothing more than whispers in the wind.” Sae supposed. What has no proof does not exist, or so she believed.

“Sit here with us,Capt. Miyazawa.” Capt. Oshima Yuko, the petite woman donned in aFrench-inspired military uniform on the right side of Takahashi and who was more or less the same height, gestured for Sae to join them.She offered the seat across that was left empty. Yuko’s amber eyes were firm while her lips were pursed thinly into a half smirk, a bestial air hung around her like a warning of an impending slaughter.She was, after all, called The Slayer for a reason.

Sae acquiesced.

“Tell me,Takahashi-san. Why did you call us out from our divisions? For you to plan this meeting here in the Capitol, surely there is something amiss.” The second person on Takahashi’s left side spoke. Capt. Yamamoto Sayaka fumbled with the katana neatly tucked within the crimson obi of her black silk kimono; blood red chrysanthemums were meticulously weaved on the fabric of her clothing.She could have been a yakuza, a top dog of a Japanese mafia in the pretense of a captivating geisha.

“Heh, we could have used the zimbra line for a teleconference, you know.” The last of the newcomers added. Capt. Sashihara Rino stood out from the group precisely because she was dressed most plainly. She zipped up her maroon jersey, the same color of her jogging pants, and buried her hands inside the jacket’s pocket while sinking comfortably in her seat.

“No, we can’t afford an information leak. Especially now that Utopia’s pursuing us more aggressively than ever.” Takamina tapped on the glass that covered the expanse of the round table and holographic images immediately appeared. Documents, diagrams, grids and photographs of different people materialized one by one.

“I’ve been given intelligence reports from our Black-Ops that Utopia is desperate on finding a way to rebuild Project Monarch. They’ve been tracing every single person associated with the program and finally got a list of those still alive.” The ex-general swiped on the screen,briefly sifting through the data. “I called you out tonight to warn you, this is my pledge to reveal the truth now that we have been driven to a corner.”

Takamina continued,showing the group photographs of research students’ inhumane training process under the program. “Do not be misinformed Capt. Miyazawa. Project Monarch is not an urban legend, it surely was not just a political scandal the government wanted to silence.”

“A thousand lives paid the price to create Utopia’s beasts.”

Sae winced at the sight of six girls looking like animated corpses after being injected with a drug that deprived them sleep for seven days. The mental collapse caused by sleep deprivation resulted to self-inflicted injuries,cannibalism and finally, suicide.

Another study presented a group of children periodically being fed poison in increasing quantities to test the level of the adaptability of the human body to toxins. One by one, they faltered; none survived.

Sayaka closed her eyes for a moment, willing the images to vanish. Her hand clenched tighter around the handle of the katana on her waist; the blade thirsted for the blood of those sadistic wretches who sat at the zenith of power.The feeling of disgust and vengeance only grew pronounced.

“Before you here are four of those who are ‘numbered’.”At Takamina’s words Sae examined each one of the three captains in front of her who did not even meet her gaze as if dreading her judgment. Disbelief clouded Sae’s concentration but she needed to let everything sink in fast.

Senbatsu,that’s what they call the highest ranked experiments.”

Yuko finally broke her long silence, “If they revive the Monarch, Utopia could crush us. Everything we have been fighting for, everything we live for, the Blue Rose Rebellion, it will all be a lost cause.”The sheer power at their disposal once the regime finds a way to rebuild the program was the last thing they needed. Surely, it would not be for the benefit of humanity once the tyrant lays his hands on the data.

The ex-general nodded. It would be the end for all of them.

Takahashi Minami always believed she carried the burden of destroying Utopia as vindication for the lives she once took, for the love she could not save. Still she believed there were sins that could never be forgiven and darkness etched in her soul that could not be erased. But she tries,the ex-general desperately tries, to carve the path towards freedom.

Takamina stopped searching the virtual folders the moment Matsui Jurina’s photograph and statistics adorned the screen. A heavier atmosphere descended upon the occupants of the room as awareness slowly, painstakingly slowly, burned.

“This is Jurina’s Bio data from ten years ago.” Sashihara stressed.

Takamina's gaze was almost vacant. There was a pregnant pause, the snares of deafening silence contracted around them before the ex-general uttered her next words. “She was the darkness created to reach paradise.”


The former General felt for the Blue Rose insignia, the only decoration on her left collar that remained out of all the military stars and medals that used to adorn her uniform—forgotten awards from when she was still in service.

The order she briefly gave Rena lingered. Those four seconds of their encounter in the corridor replayed in her mind, her own cruel words haunting her.

"Rena you know what she is. You can try taking her back, but if she awakens kill her.”

Matsui Jurina was the devil among beasts.



Her chest burned with each breath, it felt as if wisps of flames devoured her lungs. She was slowly losing her senses and the only feeling more distinct than her labored breathing was the sharp pain on her wrists. The chains that bound her hands were tight enough to produce bruises and fresh cuts each time her prison guards yanked at them.How many days had it been since she was detained? She could no longer distinguish the trickling hours, each time she woke from the feverish dreams she was only greeted by more whipping that came with the inquisition. She was not sure how many more days she could last; the long lesions on her back inflicted by her captor’s bullwhip were almost numbed. She sat there spent and battered, the only thing keeping her from sliding down the concrete floor was the set of chains pinning her to the wall.

It was cold, the icy breeze bit through her pale, bruised skin under the tattered uniform that could scarcely be called clothing. She had already lost the lower half of her jumpsuit in the course of her torture. But the air that chilled her was remotely secondary to the pain in her muscles and joints to even protest.

“Are you still alive,Matsui Jurina?” The unemotional voice inquired at the sight of the rebel's limp state. Tendrils of black short hair dampened by Jurina’s own blood obscured her face.

The woman with a cyborg-like countenance kneeled to her, lifting her chin. “You’re a persistent fool, you know. If you had just given me what I wanted then we could have skipped all this torturing.”Delicate fingers caressed her swollen cheek, yet there was no promise of warmth in the touch.

The prisoner remained silent. An exertion for her vocal chords seemed too taxing.

“Give me the location,Matsui. Tell me where Resistance is and all of this would stop.”

Jurina opened her mouth to respond, her voice raspy from dehydration. “Just kill me, Mayu.”She could almost hear herself beg for the end of all this.

“That would be too easy.” The one called Mayu tightened her grip on the rebel’s face; her fingernails burying themselves into cold skin, a promise of a new set of bruises. “I like this devotion of yours... now, if only we could put it to some good use.” She drawled pulling the other girl’s face closer to her own. Mayu could clearly see the stunning visage despite the grime and exhaustion. Jurina’s eyes held a deep ebony shade, hypnotizing like the oblivion. Mayu would admit that if they had met in a different circumstance, perhaps the wave of attraction would be justified.

“Do you want me to help you?” Utopia’s scheming architect offered, like a devil’s advocate heralding mischief. Her free hand trailed down Jurina’s exposed back, fingers danced across her spine, exploring each cut and bruise the draughts woman herself inflicted. “Do you want me to save you?” Mayu whispered smoothly to Jurina’s ear, lips moving into a ghost of a smile before nibbling the delicate flesh.

Her captor continued with the ministrations, slender fingers began stroking her abdomen then reaching her chest. Jurina sealed her eyes tightly, resisting the stimulus. She was no traitor that was certain. “I-I would rather die.” She bit her lip as a warm hand slowly descended to her inner thigh, a trail of fire burned with each touch.

“I’m sure you would,but not yet.” In one swift movement Mayu took Jurina’s lips, her tongue dipping inside the rebel’s mouth to force the other to consume a crystalline pill. Jurina jerked, shaking her head and trying to break the protracted contact but Mayu held her chin firmly, easing the medicine amid their exchange of saliva until the prisoner finally swallowed with a hoarse moan.

Mayu pulled away, her breathing hot and ragged. Jurina was no different, she was gasping for air. For the past days this had been their routine, sometimes the encounter was much more carnal, other times it was just ruthless beatings. The strategist made sure Jurina's body ached in different places but the girl was always given a nutrition capsule just enough to keep her from expiring. She was most useful alive than dead, after all.

Mayu wiped her mouth with the hem of her pristine white lab coat. A wave of disgust reflected in her unsympathetic face, the bitter taste of the medicine stayed.“Don’t think I enjoy this.”She then raised her hand to strike Jurina’s face. The slap was forceful enough to throw the girl off balance. Jurina slumped to the floor; her arm barely broke the fall.

“Let me tell you something nice, something to keep you hoping.” an acrid flavor coated Mayu’s words. “Your Captain’s coming all the way here to get herself killed just to save you.”

“R-Rena.” Jurina’s once listless eyes widened in alarm at the information. With every drop of strength remaining, she lifted herself upright, motioning to pull Mayu as the clicking of chains echoed in the vast expanse of her prison cell.

Mayu stepped back from Jurina’s reach. She waived her pointing finger in warning. “Maybe once you see her bloody corpse you’ll start talking?” She keyed in her passcode and the thick metal door slid open, blinding radiance from the florescent lights outside strained Jurina’s vision.“Better yet, I might finally awaken the devil.”Mayu threw a sneer before the door sealed shut.

Jurina felt her whole world crash; it was enough that she had resigned herself to death,but Rena, their Captain needed to survive, for the greater glory of the Blue Rose Rebellion; for the dream of liberation. Rena needed to live for both of them.

Forget me... please save yourself, Rena.”

“Captain, is anything wrong?” Sgt. Furukawa Airi eyed Rena with concern before passing on the latter’s share of dinner. They opted to spend the night in one of the abandoned buildings within the first industrial district at least 100 miles from Utopia’s headquarters. Two of their members were out surveying the perimeter while the other two stood guard on the lower floor.


“Nothing. I was just thinking of how long it would take for Kanon and Yuria’s spatial scanning, so we can get a good shot at how we’re to begin this.”Rena offered a small smile as she took the steel bowl of porridge.

“Perhaps three hours isa conservative estimate. We can move out before midnight.” Airi reassured. “I suggest you take a quick rest before we commence infiltration, Captain. You’re a bit pale.”

Rena nodded while massaging her temples. Sharp pain cut through her head for even shorter intervals now. “Mmmm…I haven’t been able to sleep for the past nights.”

“Since she was taken?”

“Since she surrendered,that fool.” Rena corrected, she couldn’t get over her own outrage when she heard that Matsui Jurina yielded in exchange of the freedom of 20 rebels from their side and refused to disclose theResistance’s headquarters for a chance to evade the death penalty.Rena specifically told the girl to wait for her and stay still but Jurina was reckless and had her own way of doing things. Rena couldn’t even understand why Jurina didn’t chose to overwhelm the soldiers who confronted Team S. The other Matsui was more than capable of retaliating. It turned Rena more livid to think that the younger girl might be scheming something beyond her knowledge. “It baffles me why she allowed it. She could have held on until I arrived.”

Airi closed her eyes in contemplation as if trying to theorize why their ever-dependable ace took such a ridiculous move. “It’s a bad habit of hers, doing things alone.” She then returned her gaze to Rena. "Nevertheless,I'm still hoping this is one of her gimmicks. You know, like all those other incidences before.”

“Alone, huh? That’s how she was always trained." Now there was a wave of melancholy that took her, Rena placed her bowl down before even eating a spoonful. “I’m worried, Airi. We have to save her before she does something stupid.” And maybe it was the fatigue, the hunger or the emotional turmoil that made Rena so vulnerable as to actually breakdown her defenses.

Airi pulled Rena closer,resting the younger woman’s head on her shoulder and patting the latter's head fondly. At this very moment, they needed neither seniority nor the chain of command. She comforted Rena as an old friend, a loyal confidante, an almost lover. “We’ll do our best.”

Rena didn’t try to resist; she was jaded. Slowly, slumber took over her as the weight of the world began to crumble in her dreams.

2 years ago

A loud crash was heard from the intercom where Rena sat monitoring the screen, three of her members had just set out for a retrieval mission to locate the remaining warheads hidden in Utopia's abandoned Kyoto Branch. General Takahashi had made it a point to find all remaining ammo in whichever base they raided. It seemed Kyoto proved to be the most difficult.Aside from the dilapidated structures, the place was littered with land mines and hidden traps. Not to mention a few destroyer droids still functioning were very well capable of hostility. The abandoned base was more like an ancient castle maze than a military establishment for Christ’s sake.

Rena clicked a few buttons on the computer's controller. “Lieutenant Matsui, status report.” She commanded the officer who bore the same surname as hers, tone firm despite her genuine concern of the apparent explosion. When only white noise and static echoed from the receiver instead of the mischievous voice of the infiltration team's leader,Rena grew agitated. "Matsui respond!"

 

 Silence.

 

The Frontier Captain would have shouted further if not for the buzzing noise followed by a few gunshots from the other line.

"Don't get too worked up princess. We've got this under control." Matsui Jurina replied before barking a few orders to her team, Team S, for execution.

Rena released a breath that she was unaware she was holding. She wanted to bite back a retort at the lieutenant's teasing but decided against it, their little word play can wait. A few more rounds of ammunition reverberated along with more explosions and Rena could’ve sworn she heard a satisfied sigh amid all the mayhem.

"Can we salvage the droids? Don't mess them up too much." Rena considered reverse engineering the technology or perhaps reconstructing their data chips for the Resistance's own usage.

"Hmmm. That's a bit hard to promise, they're aggressive and twice resilient. They wont stop moving unless we pummel them to the ground."

"Alright. Just save anything that could be useful."

Someone suddenly yelled."Jurina, a big one's coming!"

"Shit." Jurina hissed at the sight of the massive robotic figure whose arm canon was already aimed at them. One hit and it was certain death. "Catch you later, Rena."  Without second thoughts she deactivated her earpiece before shooting the ground circumference surrounding her and the mecha. The ace’s aim was deadly precise so as not include her comrades within the circumference. Nothing fazed her.

"What the hell Jurina! Are you trying to kill yourself!" Her teammate Kitahra Rie shouted as she realized what the young lieutenant was doing—Matsui was planning to take down the droid with her. Rie attempted to run to her leader but it was too late. The floor where Jurina stood gave in;the droid lost balance and misfired the canon towards the floor,shooting through the concrete like a fireball.

As the smoke cleared a gaping hole in the ground grew visible along with a pile of rubble below. "Jurina!" Rie beckoned but there was no response,only limitless darkness. She felt for her earpiece to reconnect withHQ. "Captain, send out a recon team, Lieutenant Matsui's down.S-status...unknown." She paused at a loss for words. "We'll need equipment to extract her from the ruins." Rie surveyed the area of devastation and hoped they would find the girl at the lower floors still breathing.

From the other side Rena cursed, smashing her hands at the control panel in rage or desperation. "When will that spontaneous fool start thinking?"She was obviously shaken by disbelief at the level of recklessness.Diving into danger without a care of the consequence, it was Jurina’s charm and kryptonite.Rena’s hands fisted. "Hold your ground,I'm coming with the dispatch." She hastily decided without even soliciting permission from the General. Impulsiveness, perhaps it was both their vice after all.

"Roger that.”

Rena bit her lip. "Don't you dare die on me, Jurina."

It took 36 hours to dig through the wreckage. Piles of steel, iron and concrete scattered about and a trail of blood led them to a limp body rested against the wall, almost lifeless. One would think that Lieutenant Matsui Jurina was as good as dead if not for her shallow and labored breathing.

“Captain,” Kitahara Rie muttered softly as if searching for the next words to say, she turned to Rena pensively, unsure if she should bolt towards her fallen leader right then and there.

Rena’s eyes were filled with an unreadable emotion. It was as if an inner turmoil between elation and anxiety brewed within her. She did not speak; instead she made brisk strides towards the young girl sprawled on the floor. Her outstretched hand flinched a few centimeters before her fingers could touch Jurina’s face fearing for the latter’s fragile state.

Rena could already feel water cloud her eyes. She bit back the urge to cry. “Jurina.” She whispered softly near the other girl’s ear, caressing her bloodied cheek with subtle affection. Despite the grime and filth she was still beautiful.

Jurina winced and her eyebrows furrowed, face contorted by the pain as she gradually regained consciousness.

“You’ll be fine, I’m here.” The other Matsui scanned the lieutenant from head to toe,noting every bruise and lesion in the young girl’s body. Her eyes settled on Jurina’s left thigh, which was tightly bandaged by apiece of crimson cloth. She wouldn't be able to use that leg for a month or so.

Jurina’s vision readjusted to the light of the equipment and saw the figure of a woman bent over her. “Yea, k-knew you’d come.” Her hoarse voice was still laced with a sliver of enthusiasm despite dire exhaustion.

Rena wanted to punch the girl in the gut for her absurdity but she was overwhelmed with relief just by hearing the other fighter speak. “Don't ever do this to me again.” It took a load of her self-control to not break into tears.She rested her forehead against Jurina’s and held her by the shoulder for a half-embrace. She could have died and the possibility sent Rena’s thoughts haywire.

Jurina wanted to return the intimacy but her strength was spent that even breathing grew difficult. She smiled sheepishly, “so this is how I get your attention.” She said, faking an epiphany.

“No, no. Don't be liket his.” The Captain shook her head, tucking Jurina’s disheveled hair behind her ear.

You have it… all of me.”

xxxxx

Author’s Notes: I had this sitting in my drafts folder for so long. hahaha Needed to actually finish this fic, it will only be 3 parts. Hope you guys enjoyed, I kinda miss wmatsui.
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WHERE DO I BELONG? (Fiction)





Summary: A love affair with Tokyo and Nagoya. It was inevitable, specially when she was resolved to give her all for both worlds. But what happens when she reaches the tipping point?

After climbing the stairs, it was a free fall to the ground. Who's gonna save her now?

Main Characters: Matsui Jurina, Matsui Rena, Watanabe Mayu (WMatsui/MayuJuri)

Author's Note: Well, this is my first multichapter fic for the 48-Group. I hope you enjoy.

______________



The music reverberated in her head sharply.  Each beat, each word, each movement of the choreography bounced in her skull like a blare of disorganized gibberish despite the fact that she knew the song like the back of her hand. She could dance it with routine perfection even with her eyes closed. And yet, strangely, it felt so distant…foreign even.

She attempted to synchronize herself with the tempo, willing to get into her usual dancing pace but she couldn’t understand why a huge gap between her perception and her movements existed. It was as if her body was moving against her will.[[MORE]]

Impossible. She hissed to herself. The beads of perspiration trickled down her chin; she was drenched in cold sweat and panting. Her shoulders heaved and her arms that were rested on her knees, as she crouched down for support, kept shaking. “What the hell is wrong….”Her whisper came out hoarsely in between shallow breaths. Her eyes remained fixed on her own reflection on the dance studio’s mirror—an awful sight, she noted.

Her limbs were stick thin as if another exertion could shatter her in an instant. She was always the athletic type, and no one would have ever imagined her as severely underweight as she had become. Even her hair was dull and brittle with her fringe all over her face. But what unsettled her the most was how her eyes seemed like pools of emptiness.

This was not Matsui Jurina. She was a mess.

The song that continued playing was reduced to an incoherent loop of noise at the back of her mind. She wondered, still staring deeply at her reflection, just how things came to this. She had always loved both worlds, this concurrent position; she enjoyed the exhilaration, sought after the challenge. But somewhere, in the middle of the chain of events this year, from the over lapping schedules and avalanche of work load to the never ending complaints, she found herself out of breath.

It was almost an established fact that she was groomed to withstand pressure, hate and implausible expectations that everyone was led to believe Matsui Jurina was foolproof. Of course, she carefully built on that persona—the impenetrable ace—and would never accept that weakness was part of her nature. Jurina was determined, ambitious and sometimes foolishly stubborn.  She thought the years had made her stronger, that every possible harsh word to be thrown was already spent. “You have endured much more than this. Think of the days before.” She would repeat to herself like a mantra and everything would be miraculously fine again. But not today, not today.

The music that had been blaring from the speakers all day finally stopped and the sudden silence took her by surprise. Jurina shifted her gaze to the stereo and found an unusual visitor glaring at her disheveled state.

Jurina blinked once, twice, confused as why the girl in front of her was exactly standing in front of her. Watanabe Mayu never interrupted her training sessions and though they established a decent relationship during their “Majisuka Gakuen 2” days, AKB’s center-in-waiting didn’t really act intimate with her. “Mayu-chan…?” She struggled to give the older girl a weak smile.

The miserable attempt of a smile only irritated Mayu. “Just what the hell is this? You plan on dancing yourself senseless?” She scoffed, her finger was still heavily pushing the power-off button on the stereo. “I know you’re excited of centering the next single and all but come on, know your limits.” She wasn’t always the nosy type and would often gloss over what Nagoya's ace was up to but she had been walking past the dance studio all day and there was no sign of the young girl stopping her self-torture. Enough was enough.

“Jeez, Jurina. You’ll force us all in a corner if you collapse again during promotions.”  She didn't intend to make it sound so serious.

At the remark, Jurina collected herself and stood straight, albeit taking every ounce of energy left in her. “Sorry Mayu-chan. I didn’t want to mess up and besides, I have to act on people saying I’m becoming complacent since the New Generation hype started.”

Mayu suddenly felt a wave of guilt creeping up. Maybe she shouldn’t have scolded the girl haphazardly. She scanned Jurina from head to foot and despite the cyborg in her wanting to push aside the concern, it drove a wrench in her heart to see the girl trying too hard for her own good. They both grew up in the limelight, she watched Jurina tear down the walls since she was eleven years old. Complacent…? You’re the last one to ever be complacent in performing. Eien Pressure, it would have suited Jurina title-wise.

Mayu started on her attempt of an advice. “Hey, I know you’re rushing to the top…you don’t want to lose.”  Prep talking juniors wasn’t her forte, she would admit, it was Takamina or Mariko’s role. But she felt the necessity to drive a point at Jurina. After all, if Watanabe Mayu was to become AKB’s absolute center, then she might as well start acting like the dependable senpai.  “I feel the same sense of urgency. Trust me, I understand.” She motioned closer towards the younger girl, laying a hand on Jurina’s head and ruffling her hair like a puppy. She remembered Mariko used to do the same gesture to comfort the younger girl. Mayu thought it might help to feel a bit of semblance of affection that used to anchor Jurina.

“Slow down, we’re not machines. So take care of yourself, will you?”

Jurina reached for Mayu’s hand, stopping the older girl from stroking her short hair.  No Mayu-chan, you dont understand. Nobody does.  There were depths in her heart that could not be reached, precisely because she did not allow anyone to tread on the boundary. It was her habit to keep things to herself, even before, even when she was just starting this whole idol ordeal. 

She was all grown up now , she could manage her issues on her own, but to be treated like a child again, perhaps she was still leagues behind her seniors after all.

Jurina took a deep breath before organizing her thoughts, shoving back the anxiety eating away her heart. She would allow herself to forget, even just for a while. “I’m fine, Mayu-chan.” She would repeat the same words again and again to make everyone believe, everyone including herself.

Mayu gave her a searching gaze, as if willing the young girl to come clean with what was actually bothering her. Surely, for Jurina to act all ruffled... something was bound to be amiss.

Jurina gave a much more energetic smile this time to reassure the older girl. “But you can take care of me, if you insist.” She chuckled while winking mischievously. The ever bright and bubbly facade, she was good at this, perfected it with great care, so that even if her emotions were haywire she could still smile like the sun.

Mayu raised an eyebrow in disbelief; it will never cease to amaze her how SKE’s ace could revert to her playful demeanor so effortlessly. “You’re really a hopeless flirt and here I was all worried.”

“Eeeeeh, you were thinking of me, Mayu-chan?” The short haired girl’s eyes lighted up with interest as she gave Mayu a very pleased look before locking the "cyborg" in a tight bear hug against the latter's wish.

"J-Jurina... hey." Mayu was surprised the full weight of the taller girl shifted to her, sending them both sitting on the ground. Alarm bells sounded in her head at the thought that the young girl had collapsed just as she feared. But Mayu realized a second later when she heard light snoring and Jurina's soft mumble of "thank you" against the crook of her neck.

She sighed in relief, gently positioning Jurina's head to rest in her lap. "You only got 15 minutes to use me as a pillow." She whispered while brushing away strands of ebony hair from Jurina's face. The girl was pale as a sheet of paper and her skin was cold from sweat. It scared Mayu, Jurina wasn't supposed to be fragile, she was exuberant, brash and ikemen. "This idiot." She shook her head but made no effort to rise up and disturb Jurina from her slumber. Mayu rested her back on the stereo instead, leaning on one of the buttons so that the music started to play once more.

It was only then did she start to recognize the song that had been playing on loop since morning. Her eyes  widened in bewilderment, it was not the new single Jurina was practicing.

"T-Tsuyoki Mono Yo?" Mayu studied the sleeping girl, completely taken aback at why SKE's debut single was filling her ears. Jurina was mumbling incoherently in her sleep as a tear drop rolled down her cheek. Mayu felt an indescribable heaviness in her chest, she couldn't quite place what was wrong.

Outside the dance studio, Matsui Rena was leaning on the door frame, arms crossed on her chest. She bit her lip, a habit of hers when she felt unsettled. She wanted to enter the room but decided against it. Tsuyoki Mono Yo echoed, as if drawing out her soul. Jurina didn't have to tell her what was wrong, Rena was an empath. She was the other half of WMatsui, and even if they were seldom together these days, she had developed the skill to recognize Jurina's episodes of inner turmoil.

Her reverie was broken when she was suddenly locked in a crushing bear hug from behind. Oshima Yuko greeted her with a toothy grin.  “You should talk to her, if you’re so restless about it.” Team K’s Captain shifted her gaze to the interior of the dance studio, Mayu’s back was facing them.

“I was just... passing by.” Rena lied.
8
FORGET ME NOT (Fiction)


Characters:Matsui Jurina, Kodama Haruka

Summary: Separation brings forth a fondness that routine once left obscured. Jurina and Haruka were invincible together, it was a fact. But the gears of destiny were finally moving towards a path only one of them could take.


Kodama Haruka sat before her study table, her glasses reflecting the medals, the magazine and newspaper clippings detailing every victory the Power Stones accumulated through the years. She inhaled sharply, the feeling of emptiness slicing through her chest.

 "This day would come." She whispered. Their chief informed her a few days ago that she was to be dropped from the next matches. Afterwards she would be sent overseas—a decision that would soon be known to Jurina herself.

At first she was alarmed, offended even but now Haruka felt numb, her professionalism was grounding her emotions. Nevertheless, the thought of being left behind by the one person she ever cared for in this entire career left a void in her heart that would not be filled.

 Resignation and redress were warring inside her and she could not make up her mind whether to protest or let things go. The vision of Jurina's fading back haunted her.

 Matsui Jurina was a hurricane, will unbent; spirit unbroken. She would set a goal and then surpass it. She chased no one's back; like a queen atop the tower, people admired her tenacity from afar but only a few understood her loneliness.

 This is exactly what drew Haruka in, like a moth chasing the flame. She was always a follower; quiet, submissive, unsure but stubbornly determined. Except for the first time in her life, since she became partners with the blonde beauty, Kodama Haruka wanted to see the view from the top--together.

She has been fighting to grow stronger, to not be left behind, from the moment she first learned Jurina's name. Now everything was crumbling like a sand castle crushed by the waves. At what point did she feel this immeasurable sense of loyalty to protect the other girl? She had been searching herself for the past days. ‘Would this be better for Jurina?’ ‘Was she holding her partner back?’ Haruka's thoughts were interrupted by the distinct chime of her phone.

"Hello?" She waited for her caller's purpose.

 "Eh?" Her brows furrowed, "She hasn't been responding since morning?" Haruka repeated what was said from the other line, tone tinged with concern. It was 8 in the evening, and highly unlikely for Jurina to not pick up for so long.

"Yes, I have a key to her apartment. I'll pass by." She set aside her glasses before rubbing her eyes. For a moment, confusion clouded Haruka as she fumbled through her wallet to look for the duplicate of her partner's access key. "Why is she shutting herself off again?" As proven by their last predicament over her partner’s injured knee, it was clear that the aforementioned blonde had the habit of carrying everything alone even when people were practically begging her to rely on them.

Haruka could only thank the heavens that sleepovers after their intense trainings for key matches gave her unlimited access to Jurina’s flat. After finally taking hold of the black card, she motioned to leave without any qualms--such was her devotion.

Circular glasses lay forgotten beside a Polaroid of Jurina and Haruka smiling after their very first match. “Let’s aim for the top!” Was clumsily written.

The 20 minute taxi ride to Jurina's tower felt longer than usual. Without speaking another word, Haruka alighted from the automobile and entered the grandiose 60-floor serviced condominium at the heart of Tokyo. Uneasiness crept inside her as she waited to pass each floor on the elevator until the 48th.

It has been a few days since they last spoke together after she was relieved as the blonde’s partner. It seemed they both had all the convenient reasons to avoid each other it was almost ridiculous. Haruka internally debated how she would open up a conversation.

Finally arriving in front of the 5th room, she rang the doorbell out of courtesy. In all honesty, she felt like an ex-girlfriend trying to rekindle some sort of romance. "Jurina?" She spoke via intercom. It was clearly in vain, she swiped in her access card and found the spacious unit shrouded in darkness, save for silver moonlight dripping in from the gaps between the blinds.

 "Jurina, what are you...?" Haruka found the girl sprawled on the King-sized bed, white sheets almost devouring her lithe body. Blonde hair glistened against the moonlight and Haruka could make out a pained expression as Jurina stirred, still unconscious. Haruka strode toward the mattress, laying the back of her hand on the other girl's forehead to check her temperature.

 Tired eyes met Haruka's own as the blonde girl groggily woke."I-I'm so...rry." Jurina murmured almost deliriously.

"You're burning up." Haruka frowned, brushing away sweat-damp strands of hair from her partner's disheveled face. She realized that Jurina’s unresponsiveness the whole day was most likely due to her sickness. Sometimes she felt like an apprentice, and then a mother, other times she was a stranger. Though she would never admit it out loud, there were also times she felt like a lover. "You won't even let room service in, what's with you?" Her voice cracked with worry, it was the first time she saw her partner in such a feeble state.

Jurina was supposed to be proud, collected and impenetrable. She was a goddess in the ring that people seem to forget she could still break and bleed. Yet now she could barely stand--reduced to a pile of flesh and bones under silk sheets that seemed heavier than they should be. "Sorry." The ailing girl could only repeat her reply.

 Haruka found her way to the kitchen, in haste, fetching a cooling gel pack from the freezer. "You could've called me, you idiot." Haruka's eyes welled with tears, completely shaken by Jurina's affliction as she offered the gel pack. "Why do you always insist on suffering alone?" Even when injured and worn out, her partner stood proud like a beast. It unsettled her deeply that this girl before her was closer to an empty shell, utterly vulnerable.

 Jurina tried to come through, "I'll be fine." Shirogane dojo’s ace coaxed, finally realizing how shaken Haruka was. It took great effort to speak with conviction. "It's just a fever. You're overreacting Haruka." She delicately wiped the lone tear drop Haruka could not suppress.

"I can't help it, you look half dead for just a fever."

The ace struggled to let out a chuckle, motioning for Haruka to sit on her bedside. "You're such a baby."The short-haired girl acquiesced, helping Jurina as she struggled to sit upright. The pristine sheets slid down her torso, revealing a black sports bra that contrasted with her pale body. Jurina set aside the cooling pack and reached for the glass of water on top of the drawer, the liquid effectively soothing her parched throat. Haruka took the empty glass from her before she could lose her grip.

Without warning, as if it was the most natural thing in the world, Jurina nuzzled at the crook of Haruka’s neck, basking in her partner’s warmth. Haruka always offered her a feeling of stability; she was the safety net Jurina never intended having.

 “What’s with you all of a sudden?” Haruka glanced down at the girl resting on her shoulder, a tinge of red starting to rise up her cheeks at their proximity. “Are you delirious?” No response from the ace.

 There was a pregnant pause, “I thought you’d never talk to me again. You won’t even say good bye?” Jurina mumbled out of context but Haruka knew well what the blonde was alluding to.

“So the Chief finally told you.” Haruka feigned apathy despite every fiber of her being screaming discontent, silent indignation was blossoming inside her. She was being replaced and she loathed the feeling that they were mere puppets in his game.

“I don't want this.” Scarcely did Jurina let her emotions leak out and this was one of those instances. Her eyes downcast and defeated, she did not even bother to conceal how conflicted she was.

On regular days it was Haruka who need consoling, she was, after all, the unsure one, the delicate one, and the insecure. But tonight, as if finally reaching a full circle, Haruka understood that Jurina would only break her carefully built façade in front of her—and she treated such trust with care and devotion.“It’s not something we can stop.” She started, “And besides, it seems the Chief thinks I’m holding you back.”

Jurina frowned severely; she was tired of answering to the chief’s beck and call. What more did she need to do to prove herself? “Bullshit. It wouldn't work out right if not with you.”

“It’s not like you to lose your cool.” She held Jurina by the shoulder so that they were facing each other instead of the blonde girl burrowing into her neck. “Look at me.” As they locked gazes, Haruka could feel Jurina’s brown eyes piercing through her soul.

“And how can you be so calm? I can’t believe this.” The atmosphere between them was the same as the last time Haruka refused to let Jurina enter the ring because of her injury. The blonde’s wrath that day was unrivaled but Haruka held everything in. Now the air was equally heavy and the tension between them was palpable.

“This isn’t my decision to make, don't you understand? What’s done is done.”Haruka said matter-of-factly. She would not yield this time.

Jurina held her arm with all the strength she could muster. “The hell—stop acting like a martyr, Haruka!”

“But it’s the truth! You don't need me anymore.” Haruka’s voice cracked ever so slightly as she fought to contain her emotions. Her hands fisted on the bed sheets.

 “You know that’s not true.”

 “Look, I may no longer stand beside you.” It took every ounce of Haruka’s self-restraint to not falter.“But don't let that lead you astray,” She smiled a delicate smile that was painfully sad yet so beautiful. Being taken out of the team; losing her place; losing her partner—everything hurt a thousand times more than she would allow others to perceive. But her pride as a fighter would not let herself be pitied upon. She would face this farce created by their chief with grace.And she will face Matsui Jurina with the same kind of compassion she always had. “The top will always be yours.”

 Jurina felt her walls crashing down, she was very careful to not form attachments in their career. Each match was a competition against everyone so she turned from ivory to steel—always professional, aloof like an untouchable queen. Haruka was the only person Jurina would let it in. She was more than a teammate. Haruka was like the other half of her soul. The thought of suddenly losing that sense of stability, the connection, the unspoken understanding; it suffocated Jurina.

“Please don't leave me.” It was the first time Haruka heard the other girl sound like a lost child, so uncharacteristically fragile. Jurina’s vision was slowly failing her, she felt like melting candle wax.

Before the ace could utter another word, she collapsed in Haruka’s arms. Jurina’s fever was yet to break and Haruka felt a new kind of panic settling inside her.

“Ju-Jurina?” Haruka tried to rouse her but she was completely out. Haruka disentangled the girl away from her and gently pushed her back to the bed. She laid the cooling pack on the blonde’s forehead a thousand other thoughts muddling her mind.

 “I don't have a choice, do I?”

When Jurina woke the second time she felt the cool sensation on her head. A glass of water, some medication and a bowl of warm congee was on her bedside table; but Haruka was nowhere to be seen. She was alone again amid the large expanse of her suite and she felt smaller than ever. The silence cut through her like a knife.

Jurina tried to rise and as she regained the feeling of her limbs, she noticed a crumpled paper inside her right fist.

“How lucky I am to have known someone who was so hard to say goodbye to. - Haruka”

Jurina’s eyes welled, “Damn it, Haruka.” She choked on a sob, the void in her heart expanded. 

Author’s Note: Hey y’all here’s my attempt to make a juriharu drabble based on their tofu-pro characters. Tried romantic undertones first than writing them as a full blown couple.
9
LOVE (Fiction)


This beauty,
This delight,
This happiness,

It could be love...

This anger,
This despair,
This sadness,

It could be love...

This endless bliss,
This deep loneliness,
This indescribable pain,

Maybe all of these things could be Love.

------

Main Characters:

 Matsui Rena; Matsui Jurina.



: yup I know it's Valentine's....but the sadist I am... let me give you some WMatsui Angst.. as usual. XP[[MORE]]

XXX

Like crystal beads falling from the sky, each droplet scattering light... or perhaps tears, tears of those who watch us from above.

Rain...

She always felt a distinct longing as she gazed at the diamonds, washed out. One by one, sliding down the window sills like they were the most beautiful yet most fragile thing. Can all the things in this world, the torrent emotions in her chest, melt away like colours in the rain?

Maybe... Maybe not.

The cold breeze hummed a melody to her ears, softly, like a tune she had often heard, memorized by the lines repeatedly. It was nostalgic and even as she willed to forget it, bury it in the depths of her consciousness, pretend she couldn’t hear; this sound, the splashing rain, echoing to what seemed like a song tugging her soul, she could not unlearn it. It was like the rhythmic beating of her heart, once stopped, would mean her own demise.

She lifted her head, watching the ashen clouds pass by, watching the droplets fall to the earth, obscuring her vision to a hazy blur. Such heavy sentiments clinging to her heart, Matsui Rena did not need them, she needed release. So much that her chest would explode thinking a second more. This was not how things should turn out.

She inwardly cursed her incompetence, her inability to restrain her emotions, collect herself to the levelled "Rena" she always was.

Captains don't cry. It's our burden.

"You're insane, Rena. Damn insane to not want her."

And yet no matter how much the rationality in her wanted to keep everything in place, one single part, the part beating in her chest suggested otherwise. She was lost, torn between the thresholds of want and regret, love and guilt; all these emotions spiralling inside her and so many more she could not name.

Only a few days ago she was laughing, holding Jurina's hand like there was nothing else more important. And as she remembered the feeling of those long slender fingers laced in between her own, she could not help but wince as the memories begin to flood in. How the familiarity in between her fingers felt so perfect and how the absence of those fingers now felt hauntingly empty.

________


"Rena, do you know why our hands have spaces in between?" The younger girl whispered to her with an all knowing grin as they walked towards the building after their usual early morning jogs. The sun was beginning to rise, peeking with its reddish gold dyes across the horizon. It was always so beautiful, one of the reasons they woke up early despite being sleepyheads.

She turned to Jurina neutrally, after wiping a bead of sweat that slid down her forehead. "Tell me, Jurina." The half-frozen autumn wind blew past them with a rustle of maple leaves.

Nagoya's Ace took a deep breath, turning to the sky with its vibrant colours blending with the clouds then glancing back at the other Matsui with an inspecting gaze. It took her a few more moments before answering. She held out her hand, wanting Rena to look at it closely. "It's because somewhere in this lifetime, we'll find someone to fill the gaps in between these spaces."

The young girl's voice was gentle like the rustling wind, almost fond and Rena could not help but notice the sharp pang in her chest, the unusual racing of her heart, her irregular breathing.

"Someone who'd make us complete."

Rena lifted her gaze, meeting Jurina's smouldering dark amber ones with the depth she could not fathom. It drew her in, rooted her in place and sucked the vitality within. She could not help but be moved by the gentle expression that crossed Jurina's countenance, one of the rare occasions she was not weary of the fast-paced lives they lived.

Jurina was smiling. The boyish charm she would only show to her and her alone, and somehow she felt at ease.

With a swift, orchestrated move, Jurina took Rena's hand, carefully lacing her fingers in between. The older girl's golden bracelet chimed with the metal of the other half laced on her right wrist.

The warmth of Jurina's palm enveloped her smaller hand, gentle like the rays of the sun in an early spring morning. She knew that hand, the contours of Jurina's fingers, the lines of her palm; she knew it all too well.

"See? It's a perfect fit."

________


As fleetingly as the memory came, it left Rena, alone again under the merciless downpour of rain.

"Perfect fit...huh?" She whispered quietly against the fabric of her ebony jacket as she wiped the dampness from her face. How long has she been standing here? Soaked wet and chilled to the bone, she couldn't even recognize the flow of time. She didn't even feel the cold biting wind.

She felt though, the vibration from her left pocket. Her mobile was ringing again and it had been doing so for the past hour. The person on the other line was desperate to reach her and she, she was running away again.

No matter how many missed calls and messages registered on her bright screen, they were all greeted with hard cold neglect.

She did not want to be reached.

The stirring confusion inside her, the conflicting feelings dividing her and breaking her apart all the same. She no longer knew which to surrender to.

She loved Jurina, loved her so much that it was painful to breathe.
And the young girl loved her, loved her so much that she was Jurina's music.

And yet what was this empty void lingering in her chest?

Rena, what's wrong? You've changed.

She closed her eyes, wanting to drown away those words and the scorching sting they had left in her heart.

"I have, J... I have."

The innocent uncertainty since she first accepted she was indeed in love with her rival, her best friend, her Jurina.

The exhilaration that took her above the ground when Jurina spoke how much she loved her.

The unbridled passion that burnt her senseless that faithful night they both gave in.

The contentment as the Ace locked her in her strong arms for an embrace, whispering She'd hold her even if tomorrow never comes.

Everything she felt and was supposed to feel, all washed out into a blank slate, whiter than the first fall of snow. It was a tidal wave that engulfed her whole and left her with nothing else to return to.

Perhaps the fireworks lost their luster.

Perhaps the flames died out to ashes.

Perhaps....

Just what happened?

"I don’t know."

She was a mess and she made no effort to deny it.

Is this all the great Matsui Rena, Nagoya's Princess could amount to? She could spite herself this very moment. Matsui Rena was not supposed to run away. Surely, this was not how SKE groomed her. She was born for resilience, and yet in this most vulnerable hour, her head hung low, her hands clasped white almost drained of blood. She would not even recognize herself. She ran her shaking fingers through her soaked light brown hair, her auburn tendrils spun across her face.

Horrible,
Pathetic,
How...
Weak.

She felt the weight on her chest more unbearable than it had ever been, strangling her, pulling her down, stealing her ability to speak.
 

Even with you, I feel so lonely...



[Matsui Jurina
Calling...]

She finally reached for her mobile, holding it out from the depths of her inner pocket. "Damn it." She cursed as if having been burnt from touching the answer key.

It was time to stop running,
But she did not speak.

Rena, listen to me.

She could visibly hear the younger girl's voice breaking despite the sound of white static noise, despite the crashing rain.

The desperation, the pain, Jurina wasn't even trying to hide it.

Rena couldn’t bear the thought of hurting her.
It broke her all the same.

"J, I'm sor-"

Just listen to me... Please Rena.
 

"It's not the same anymore, Jurina."

 

This regret,

This distance,

Maybe it could still be love.

_____

Transposed this to fit WMatsui. Just my effort to explore how Jurina and Rena's relationship drifted apart.

Sometimes the flames die out, even when love still exists.
10
REPRISE (Fiction)




 

Summary: What if Yuko-san and Center were from the same era? Majijo was always struggling with an erratic power structure and the freshman complicated it further. Majisuka Gakuen AU. [Center x Yuko Friendship]

Main Characters: Oshima Yuko, Matsui Jurina; CenterxYuko



Act I: Rappapa - ラッパッパ

The distinct smell of old fur and leather filled the club room as streaks of sunlight seeped in from the opening of the red blinds bearing Majisuka Gakuen’s banner — an outline of a cherry blossom underneath the bold letters “MJ.” Sado allowed herself to sink back on the secondary wing chair beside the president’s leather throne. She absentmindedly stared at the portraits on the wall, musing about how only a few weeks back a different set of pictures adorned the room. She focused on each face one by one, engraving every detail in her mind, noting the differences between the previous lineup and the current Four Queens. Hierarchy was fluid in Majijo, one day you’re at the top, the next day you might as well kiss the ground. A ray of light bounced back on the biggest portrait of the reigning president, blinding her for a moment.

 When her vision readjusted, Black was in front of her. The girl’s speed and stealth was unrivaled, that Sado was sure of. “Yabakune denounced the armistice again.” The dark girl muttered subtly, she had been gathering intel from the rival school and things did not look promising at all. “They’re preparing for another confrontation.”

 “Those fools never get tired of mopping the floor.” Sado hissed. She was certain Majijo held all the cards in this game, however the power succession in Rappapa was just stabilizing after Oshima Yuko wiped out all the incumbent student council members. “You and Gekikara take them down before they even stand a chance.” She ordered ruthlessly. The small girl had only assumed presidency a few months back and though all the students were awe-stricken by her destructive capacity, some were of course still apprehensive of a second year ruling against tradition.

 Black nodded and the door flew open. Shibuya and Torigoya made their entrance, the former took her place on the long couch while the latter made way to Sado’s side.

 “Had fun lording over some flies, Shibuya?” The short-haired girl mocked the newcomer.

 Shibuya only rolled her eyes and mussed over her lavishly decorated manicure. “Someone’s stirring up the lower floors. That arrogant transfer student needs to be disciplined.” A frown crossed her face as she noticed the chipped coating at the tip of her pointing finger. “Shit,”

 Sado hated to admit it, but the aforementioned first year was starting to grate her as well. The girl was thrown into the scene when Yuko brought her to Majijo half dead one day. The rest was a long story the sadist couldn’t be bothered to recall.

 As if on cue, Torigoya laid a hand over Sado’s fur coat, pressing the taller girl’s shoulder. “She’s coming. I can see it.” All four occupants of the room shifted their gazes towards the doorway as the clinking of heels echoed across the stair case.

 A girl decked in her cream colored cardigan emerged from the corridor, she held onto the door frame for support. Her countenance was battered and broken, hair completely disheveled, yet still she stood with pride.  “Where isshe?” Her dark amber eyes reflected defiance even as a trail of blood dripped from her forehead and the side of her lips was badly bruised. It was obvious she had just finished a fight.

 By she, it could have only meant Oshima Yuko. Sado’s gaze sharpened dangerously, she scanned the young girl from head to foot. There was an air of severity a first year shouldn’t emit and yet this girl did. She wondered what kept the brat grounded despite the multitude of injuries.

 Black raised her guard, her fingers were already fumbling with the rosary around her neck when Shibuya unceremoniously rose from the divan and hastily grabbed the freshman by the jaw.

 “You dare set foot in this room.” Shibuya growled, burying her long fingernails on the other girl’s cheek, it drew blood.

 The freshman’s expression did not change, unfazed by the pain. She gave Shibuya an equally intimidating glare.

 “I don’t know why Yuko-san tolerates a brat like you, but let me make it clear,” the queen’s teeth gritted in utter annoyance as she tightened her hold on the bruised face. “One wrong move and I will devour you.”

 Not to be outdone, the freshman raised her left hand to lock Shibuya’s wrist in a vice grip, emphasizing that she could break it if she willed. “Where is she?” The same words were merely repeated.

 Torigoya took a step forward only to be stilled by Black’s outstretched hand, motioning her to keep distance.

 The tension in the atmosphere suddenly felt suffocating. Sado clicked her tongue in displeasure. “Break it off, you idiots.” Her tone was always laced with dominance.

 There was few seconds of unresponsiveness before both girls reluctantly released each other, the heat of battle already boiling in their veins. The freshman wiped blood off her cheeks with the hem of her cardigan before running her fingers through her dampened black locks.

 “The President’s at the rooftop.” The sadist muttered tastelessly, Yuko’s fondness of this insolent brat did not amuse her.  Nevertheless, it was the sole reason keeping them from tearing her apart.  “Run along before I decide against my own benevolence, Matsui.”

 Without another word, the freshman motioned to leave, dragging her body that almost felt like dead weight. Rappapa watched as she disappeared into the darkness of the corridor.

 “Such a persistent kid.” The Vice President sighed while massaging her temples to ease her growing headache. Their carefree leader had the habit of escaping her duties and Sado, of course, was left to clean up the mess.

 “How fiery,” Torigoya stifled a chuckle.  “She sure reminds me of someone.”
 ———————————————

Act II: Bond -

Yuko stretched her arms with a big yawn; a folded white paper was in her grasp. She allowed herself drink in the warm rays of the sun as the breeze wafted her auburn hair. She stared out into the horizon for what seemed like an eternity, relishing the view from the top. A multitude of thoughts clouded her mind, a stark contrast to the clear sky above her. She glanced at the paper crumpled between her fingers for a fleeting moment before returning her concentration to the vast expanse beyond.  Her reverie was broken by the sound of footsteps and the rustling of a school uniform.

 “Looks like they got you good this time, eh Jurina?” She gave a toothy grin at the sight of the younger girl dreading to collapse any second.

 Matsui Jurina stood beside the exuberant president and shifted her weight to the railings, grasping the metal bars to support herself. Standing had never been this excruciatingly painful, every muscle in her body screamed for rest, the tingling sensation on her cheeks was starting to dull but fingernail marks stained her pale skin.

 “Was it one of my Queens? Shibuya wouldn’t give you that kind of damage, it would be a one-hit KO.” Yuko droned, “hmmm…and there’s no way Torigoya would awaken without my permission.”

 “Yuko-san,”

 The president seemed younger than her age as she theorized enthusiastically. Jurina sighed inwardly to herself as she watched the older girl muse over her worn out state. “It was Black! No wait, you look so fucked up it has to be Gekikara.”

“Yuko-san,”

 “I think Sado would-” Yuko was suspended from her next words when the freshman rested her head on the president’s shoulder. At their close proximity, Yuko could feel every sharp breath the young girl took. Only then did it dawn to her that the damage inflicted was more serious than she offered to recognize.

 “Did they knock you in the head too hard…Jurina….?” The freshman had shifted her whole weight to Yuko’s side. “Who did you fight this time?”

 Jurina shook her head lightly, comfortably nuzzled under Yuko’s chin. “It doesn’t matter.” Closing her eyes, she tried to compose herself and even her breathing. She would not tell the older girl how stupid higher years ganged up on her just because she was “all friendly with Yuko-san.”

 Yuko smirked, “such a sharp tongue for a freshman.” She lightly pushed Jurina away from the crook of her neck so that they were now face to face. Yuko patted the girl on the head, every cut and bruise reminded her of her own pains, wounds that should have healed but remained. Her other hand grasping the folded paper that contained the test results of her MRI tightened. She felt a distinct sensation clawing her throat, crushing her chest, as she forced an all too weary smile.

 Jurina’s amber gaze held her own. “You can’t keep me in the lower floors forever, Yuko-san.” She had repeated time and time again, how driven she was to climb the stairs and challenge Rappapa. Yuko would brush it off and laugh.

 Now the president frowned. “Stop trying to live so fast.” She would never understand why the neophyte had the habit of rushing everything and anything. Yuko ran her fingers through her auburn hair before making way to sit on the bench.  She was the type of person to act at her own pace after all. All the time in the world… She couldn’t help but mock herself inwardly.

 Jurina’s gaze followed her but she did not move from the railings. “There’s something I need to tell you.” The freshman started with a slight instability in her usually leveled tone.

 “I have to say something as well, but go on first.”

 Matsui took a deep breath, struggling to form her next words. “The second semester,” A gust of wind blew, wafting their hair like flowing dark curtains. There was a pregnant pause, as if the world stood still and the only thing more evident was the distance in between. “I’m leaving for Germany.”

 Yuko’s smile faltered; a blank expression crossed her face as she nodded. She locked her gaze on the younger girl, taking note of the contours of her face, memorizing her features. They had only known each other for a few months and yet Yuko felt as if she had seen this face lifetimes before. Why did those words unsettle her too much? Why was there such a distinct pang of regret? It was as if something silently broke deep inside the recess of her mind. She was supposed to be the only one practicing her goodbyes and yet, the kid apparently beat her to it. The irony almost tasted too bitter for Yuko’s liking, bitter that she couldn’t force another chuckle.

“You were saying?” Jurina urged the older girl to speak out.

 “I was planning to hand over a few things.” She softly answered. The setting sun took her attention, the orange-purple hues of dusk filled her panorama as the ball of fire slowly sank behind the buildings and structures of Tokyo. She never found something more majestic, something more bittersweet than the king of the heavens surrendering itself to the embrace of darkness. No matter how glorious it’s reign, the sun was bound to disappear and the laws of nature would ascertain it.  “But I guess I still can’t let go of a few baggage. Forget about it.” The paper in her grasp was crumpled further, her fisted hand shaking.

I can’t let go yet

Jurina motioned towards where the president sat, towering just in front of the older girl. She wasn’t one to freely showcase her emotions, but the circumstances, the thought of separation, everything else compelled her to. In one swift move, she wrapped her lithe arms around Yuko’s neck. Like a lost child that finally recognized someone familiar, the freshman locked her in a firm embrace, as if fearing the inevitable parting. Only recently did she find a guiding light and now she would lose it — the only semblance of a comrade, a sister, a mentor.

“I don’t want to be alone again.”

It took a few seconds for Yuko to respond. She stroked the young girl’s back as if to console her, pulling her down so that they were both seated on the bench. “You’re gonna be fine.” She whispered, it was the same sentence she used to convince herself. She ran her fingers through Jurina’s jet-black hair soothingly. The walls guarding her wanted to collapse, the thought of borrowed time trickling away lingered at the back of her mind.

“When I come back, I’ll climb the stairs towards you.” The embrace was not broken

Yuko’s lips curved into a small smile, the crumpled piece of paper fell from her grasp only to be carried away by the wind. There were things she could not change; neither of them could run away. But she swore to her soul she would keep fighting, even in vain.

It’s a promise then.”

———————————————

Act III: Flower - 

Sado watched the midget president’s back in front of her as they walked on. Beside them, the river glistened like diamonds against the silver moon. She could no longer count how many times they passed by the same scenery on their way home. She silently prayed they could walk the same path a thousand times more.  “How was the test result?” She asked half-heartedly.

Yuko twirled like a child to face the vice president, her signature grin plastered on her face. It was this same vibrant disposition that made everyone think her energy was limitless. “I’m strong as a horse, it seems.” There was a slight strain in her voice that was left unnoticed as she lied.

“That’s good then.” Sado inhaled deeply, relieved. It took her a few more steps before deciding to speak again. “If you’re attached to that freshman so much, then let her climb the stairs.”

Yuko’s exuberance suddenly shifted to a reserved demeanor. Her eyes reflected coldness that would intimidate anyone as she continued her strides. “I’ll hear none of this.” She had always avoided conversations that led to Matsui Jurina confronting Rappapa and she was determined to suspend it as long as she could.

The taller girl’s gaze followed her leader as the gap between them lengthened. Sado shook her head in discontent while picking up her pace to walk beside the president. “There’s a hierarchy we need to keep, stop making it obvious that you favor her.”  At her words, Yuko ceased from taking another step. Sado knew she struck a nerve, she sure as hell did.  When the other girl remained silent, Sado grabbed her by the arm. “You saw her wounds, didn't you? We both know all the higher years are out for her neck because of your special treatment. You want to protect her but you’re just forcing her to the limit.”  There was distinct urgency in her tone as she glowered down at Yuko.

“They won’t stop attacking her unless she earns her place in Rappapa. To everyone else, she’s just an unworthy brat.”

The president pulled back her arm, breaking away from the hold. “It’s not her time yet.” She was fed up of everyone judging each decision and action she made. Screw the bureaucratic maze, Oshima Yuko was a free-spirited beast, she cannot be contained. “Jurina will prove her worth once she’s ready, follow my orders and stand your ground.

“And so you want them to tear her apart before you’re in the mood to fight her? Yuko, they oppose your favoritism and more than that, they despise her.


“Understand this Mariko.” Yuko finally used Sado’s real name to stress the weight of her resolve.  “A Rose cannot bloom if you pluck it out from the stem too early.” Now, her eyes held a tenderness that was as tranquil as the still river. The ebony sky above them was cracked with moonlit luminescence struggling to transcend the passing clouds. “Give her time to surpass me and she will go beyond expectations."

The vice president heaved a sigh in surrender. There was no winning against Yuko-san. “She’s strong, I’ll admit that. But even lions wear down.”

Yuko gave a jaded nod, “I know…I know.” Strength was not infinite, everything was bound to break—just like her mortal existence that would soon fade.

One by one, petals of the non-existent flower kept in the depths of her soul will all fall and wither; like a flood of cherry blossoms. Fragile, ephemeral, beautiful.

———————————-

Act IV: Cherry Blossoms -


“Ne Jurina, do you know where the heart is?”

The said girl motioned to the left side of her chest, “its beating right here.”

“Nope~” Yuko shook her head firmly with a childish grin gracing her features. “The heart is here.” Her fist lightly connected with the younger girl’s chest as she gave a soft punch.

“The heart is passed on through actions… through our bonds… lives we touch from meetings and goodbyes.” The president then reached for Jurina’s hand to hold it in a tight grip.

“I’m passing on my heart to you.”


 Slowly, slowly… memories were washed away by reality.

Only the soft humming of the breeze filled her senses as she stood in front of the great cherry tree at the edge of the hill, carnation pink petals fell like rain. There was a strange air of calmness that enveloped her being despite the void in her heart. The sharp pang of longing spilled out of her amber eyes, but not tears. She had cried herself to sleep for many nights that perhaps they have finally dried out.

 “When did you arrive?” A familiar voice reached out to her. She turned around to greet Shinoda Mariko, or Sado, decked in a nurse uniform. They exchanged slight nods. She remembered, there was a storm that night the older girl called from Tokyo and broke the news. “She’s gone.” She felt her world crash down with the rain; all the colors melting away like water puddles on Germany’s dull gray streets.

 Matsui Jurina refused to believe it, but when she heard the former vice president’s voice crack followed by incoherent whimpers, she couldn’t stop her own stream of tears. 

 “Just last night. I’m sorry I couldn’t attend your graduation.” Jurina promised to come back, but now the person she cherished the most was ashes beneath the ground; she wasn’t even able to say goodbye. “I couldn’t send her off.”  She will always hate herself for it.

 Sado sensed the heaviness that hung over the young girl’s shoulder. She had, after all, the same shadows eating away her heart. But Yuko wouldn’t allow them to wallow in misery after her death. Sado laid a gentle hand on the second year’s shoulder and then spoke the only words of comfort she knew would matter. “She was happy…to the very last.”

 Cherry blossom petals pooled at their feet. Jurina lifted her gaze from the earth that cradled the mortal existence of a person so great.  “I’m going back to Majijo.” There was resolution crystal clear in her voice.

 The decision was the last thing to surprise Sado. “You’ll be greeted by the new Rapapa. Maeda was chosen by Yuko-san. She’s a tough challenge.”

 “I’ll crush them regardless.”

 The nurse in training couldn’t help but smirk at the haughty declaration befitting Yankees like them. “You never change, still the arrogant brat.” She felt the familiar fervor of youth course through her veins like battle drums sounding war. This was the Majisuka Jyogakuen way.

 “I’ll climb the stairs.” There was a gentle rupture of light that outlined Jurina’s appearance as her profile shone against the rays of the sun. For a fleeting moment, she looked like an apparition; a memory of someone Sado knew all too well.

 “Sado, it’s time to bring in a new wind.” And though it was Jurina’s own words, for a second, a minute, an hour, a lifetime, Sado heard the nostalgic chime of Yuko’s voice. It was the same passionate tone driven to fight and win, the same sentence that was spoken with conviction that faithful day Oshima Yuko decided she would seize the top. Warmth enveloped Mariko like a longing embrace as she gazed at the younger girl whose eyes were filled with so much life.

An era has passed, the cherry blossoms are falling. 

Can you see this…Yuko? The roses are blooming, just like you said.

---------------------------------

Act V: Center - センタ--

The usual scenery of a dilapidated rooftop filled her panorama. Vandalism, trash, steel and rusting metal, everything was scattered like always that it felt as if she never left.

“Quit spacing out now.” The hooded figure interrupted her silent musings as she reminisced fragments of the past. For the record, the Timberland boots made a distinct sound that allowed her to easily recognize the newcomer.

“Nezumi"

“Today’s the day you challenge Maeda, so stop moping around and get your ass on top of the staircase Jurina.” A devious glint in Nezumi’s eyes was ever present; scheming was of course a second nature.

The second year decked in her cream-colored cardigan sighed deeply at her partner’s lack of patience, something both of them were short of, in all honesty. “I got it.” She made her way towards the door leading to the stairs but stopped just before opening it.

A condescending smirk,

“It’s Center.”

----------------------

Author's note: I honestly don't know what just possessed me to write this. Maybe it's the YukoxJurina feels I've been having for a while now. Regardless of the unusual pairing, I hope you enjoyed it. ;D
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