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Author Topic: Heartbeat (20/20) + Partners (23/23) + Destiny (23/?) [WMatsui] (23/05/2017)  (Read 84474 times)

Offline genkingblack

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Hello there, it's been a while since my last comment.
Looks like i missed quite lot chapter

Look! My hunch was right  :lol:
Now i am getting worried again, in real life of course they won't touch Jurina if she is really having scandal.

Let's see how those two cope with this problem.

My Projects :
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Offline Minami-chan

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Happy 20th birthday Jurina!

Offline sophcaro

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REPLIES TO COMMENTS


Please, if Miichan hunted her out of an guy's house to spend the night!

I'm sorry, but I didn't understand that sentence...  :?

:banghead: :banghead: :banghead:

I know right  :angry:

Why suspend her? The group is in such a delicate situation already.  :?

Because it's not a small issue and they need to address it in some way?

Jurina must be feel so guilty about the news. I kinda expected her to blame herself :nervous and it's not too hard to imagine how broken she is :cry: sometimes I wanna give this kid a pat on her back but I know she'll be happier if Rena were the one who did that xD

Well, yeah... Obviously, she feels responsible for it.

Thankfully our older Matsui is always there to help her through the rough time. Our typical cool headed Rena. I'm not surprise with the way she reacted to the news.
Somehow I can feel it how Rena is the biggest support for Jurina.

I love how Rena could take the problem calmly; at least in front of Jurina. That's exactly what Jurina needed at the moment.

It's not easy for Rena either, but she's trying to be a good moral support for Jurina. She knows Jurina is more likely to have difficulties dealing emotionally with the situation.


The good news is...Jurina could spend more time with Rena?
Or it could be worse. Jurina wouldn't want to meet Rena until the chaos is over.  :err:

Or maybe it could be the reverse? Rena putting some distance with Jurina?  :?

Let's not forget that Churi also played a good role as her friend.
I kinda wondered what Churi was doing when both Matsui were in a room of her apartment.  :on lol:

Yep, Churi is a good friend  8)
What was she doing? Preparing dinner, of course!  :P

Hello there, it's been a while since my last comment.
Looks like i missed quite lot chapter

Look! My hunch was right  :lol:
Now i am getting worried again, in real life of course they won't touch Jurina if she is really having scandal.

Let's see how those two cope with this problem.

Let's get worried again  :sweatdrop:
« Last Edit: April 03, 2017, 03:03:41 PM by sophcaro »
My WMatsui fanfics:

HEARTBEAT trilogy
- Heartbeat | Completed
- Partners | Completed
- Destiny | Ongoing

OTHER FANFICS
- Back in Time | Ongoing
- Warriors | On hiatus (will return in December 2017)
- One Shot collection: Her Sun | Completed
- Fire and Water | On hiatus

Feedback is deeply appreciated, and comments motivate me to write!

Offline sophcaro

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CHAPTER 18



It had now been two weeks since Jurina was suspended, and management still hadn’t specified – whether officially or informally – how long SKE’s ace suspension was going to last. It was evident that this scandal had taken them by complete surprise, and they were still unsure on the best way to deal with those unexpected pictures revealed by the magazine. The general opinion remained divided on the subject, and it was still too soon to measure the possible consequences on the group’s image.

As of Jurina, she had been terribly affected by her suspension. The minute Rena received the text from Jurina announcing her suspension she had called her back immediately, and had spent more than an hour over the phone trying desperately to comfort her girlfriend who proved to be completely inconsolable.

The weeks following the suspension’s announcement, the 19 years old girl was not allowed to participate in any official SKE or AKB events, including live performances and handshake events. Since that evening Rena went to see Jurina at Akane’s apartment after her return from Osaka, both Matsui did not meet again. In the light of Jurina’s suspension, Rena had thought it best that they keep their distance, at least until management had officially made a decision regarding Jurina’s future in the group.

One thing was for sure: Jurina wasn’t delighted in the slightest when she made such suggestion. In fact, her immediate reaction was to protest, and to try and change Rena’s mind on the subject. The older Matsui somewhat expected such response and – even though she didn’t like this option any more than her - believed deep down it was the wisest thing to do given the current circumstances. There were so many impending issues, and too many things at stake. They simply couldn’t afford having a paparazzi taking more pictures of them when management was currently deliberating on Jurina’s fate.

Rena exposed all those arguments to Jurina who – although she abhorred the idea of a physical separation and didn’t fail into voicing loud and clear her disapprobation – ended up agreeing reluctantly to limit their contacts to chats and phone calls. More than a few times, Rena realized how hard it was to stick to such resolution, especially when she listened with great pain to her girlfriend’s disarray over the phone, and was incapable of giving her all the comfort she needed.

Everyday, they talked on LINE, and Rena was well conscious that Jurina was not in a right state of mind. As she feared, this suspension was having a real negative impact on her mental balance. Much as Jurina never liked showing her vulnerability in front of others and believed she ought to act strong, the truth was very different. In reality, Jurina was a very sensitive person.

Throughout her career as an idol, Jurina had definitely been through a few rough patches, especially when she saw the people she was the most attached to leaving her side and graduating. However, Rena was starting to wonder if this suspension was not affecting her to an even higher level. Jurina always felt very frustrated when she wasn’t able to perform, whether because of her young age, or because of health issues. But never until that day had she been prevented from doing – and for such a long period of time - a job she adored and enjoyed so much.

Even if it was a very small consolation, Rena knew Jurina was surrounded by people who cared about her, and who could give her the physical comfort she currently couldn’t. During those two weeks, Jurina lived mostly at her mom’s house, even though she frequently liked to stay and sleep at Akane’s place.

Much as Jurina was having a very hard time accepting her suspension, Rena refused to be too pessimistic regarding her future. Even though management still hadn’t made a decision, she was convinced Jurina was not going to be asked to graduate, or transferred to a sister group. In fact, she was even a little hopeful Jurina would simply be reintegrated in SKE48 once the storm would have finally passed.

During Jurina’s absence, her center position had been occupied by the 5th gen member Nao Furuhata. The 20 years old girl was thankfully not alone to assume the heavy burden of leading the group. She also had a WCenter with her, yet not the one who had played that role along Jurina’s side those last few months. Indeed, Ayuka had unexpectedly been demoted from her position, and replaced by Rara Goto.

Rena had no idea what motivated management to make such a change and place their faith in Rara, but she was unfortunately well aware of Ayuka’s fragile position within the group, especially after the commercial failure of SKE’s latest single.

It seemed management was trying to make the best of an unfortunate situation, and trying out a completely new combination. From the echoes Rena received, it appeared the pair Nao and Rara formed worked quite fine - which was undeniably good news for SKE - but far less reassuring when Ayuka’s fate was concerned.

Of course, when Jurina had heard about Ayuka’s replacement, she immediately put all the blame on herself, stating it was the direct consequence of her suspension. Rena knew how protective Jurina was of Ayuka, and how much she had fought to preserve her position as WCenter. If management ended up being completely satisfied with Rara, then it was very unlikely Ayuka would ever be offered the position again.

Considering Jurina’s current fragile state of mind – clearly aggravated by Ayuka’s recent ousting - Rena seriously feared she would go back to her old patterns, and neglect her health again. Until now Akane, who was keeping a cautious eye on the younger Matsui, had – each time she had manifested her concern about it - always reassured her that Jurina was taking care of herself and eating properly. 

Nevertheless, Rena couldn’t ignore a small voice inside her head warning her that the tide could turn at any moment. If there was one thing Rena certainly didn’t want, it was to see the past repeat itself. If Jurina started neglecting her health again, the older Matsui feared she would have a hard time stopping the infernal spiral. In the past, all her attempts had always failed miserably one after another.

And the odds of this happening were unfortunately very high, especially if Jurina’s suspension didn’t soon reach an end…

Since Rena graduated, she had kept her distance with the 48 group, rarely taking pictures with active members, and even less making appearances at 48 group events. It was part of a strategy she had carefully elaborated with her agent months ago, an attempt to progressively get rid of her idol’s image.

Rena didn’t regret her passage in the idol industry, but she didn’t want to be forever known as a former member of SKE48. Of course, she wasn’t naïve: she was perfectly conscious it would take time until people would stop viewing her as SKE’s eternal Nagoya princess. However, Rena was pleased to note the strategy was starting to gradually pay off.

Very rarely, interviewers would question her about her former activities as an idol, or ask her to comment on SKE related news. Moreover, her solo career as an actress was doing very well; better than what she would have anticipated. However, this Thursday of February, Rena had decided to make a small infringement to her own rule.

This afternoon, she had an appointment in Tokyo with someone she had not seen nor spoken to in several months. Someone without who SKE48 would purely and simply never have existed.

As she was sitting quietly in the waiting room - and replying politely to the few people addressing her now and then to check if she needed anything - Rena’s mind was anything but at rest. It had taken her several days to make the decision to meet this person in particular and, after weighting the pros and cons, she knew she had to try to make herself heard for Jurina’s sake.

Rena didn’t know how her request was going to be received. It was a bold move; and she guessed it was going to go very hard to sway her interlocutor, no matter how well she had improved on her communication skills these last years. However, Rena guessed that if there was one person who could have any influence on Jurina’s current situation - and possibly put an end to her suspension - it was the man she was about to meet in a few minutes.

Out of precaution, Rena had not said a word to Jurina about it. Not only was she conscious Jurina would probably not approve of her actions - and would dislike the idea of her pleading her case on her behalf - the outcome of this meeting was also very uncertain. She didn’t wish to give the younger girl false hopes if her request ended up being unfortunately dismissed.

Rena looked up when she heard the sound of a door opening, and she locked gaze with the man in a black suit who had stepped out of the office. Immediately, she stood up from her seat, and inclined her head slightly. “Akimoto-san.”

“Rena-san,” the man in his fifties reciprocated the polite gesture, and took a small step aside. “I apologize for the wait. Please come in.”

The former idol did as she was told and entered his office, taking a seat when the producer motioned the empty chair in front of his desk. “Thank you for accepting to receive me under such short notice.”

“It has been a while, Rena-san,” the producer commented, crossing his arms over his chest in a nonchalant way once he was comfortably seated in his chair. “I’ve heard your solo career is going well. Destiny received many good reviews and had great ratings.”

“It’s true,” Rena confirmed with a polite smile. “I’m lucky to have a very good agency. I’ve been working on several interesting projects since last July.”

Their producer had always been a man hard to decipher, and Rena was reminded of it when she tried to analyze his body language, and his legendary composure gave nothing away of his true feelings and thoughts. The platitudes continued for a little while, Rena playing along and replying obediently to everything she was asked. 

The motive of her visit still hadn’t been broached, and the older Matsui wondered if the producer suspected anything. He was an intelligent man, and it was obvious she had not come all this way to Tokyo for the sole purpose of catching up with lost time. Rena waited for the moment the producer would give her any sign their small talk was finally over, her patience soon rewarded. “Why did you wish to see me today, Rena-san?”

“Jurina,” Rena replied, refusing to beat about the bush any longer. “I was hoping we could talk about her current situation.”

The man readjusted his glasses on his nose and leaned back in the black leather chair, his expression remaining completely unreadable when he spoke up. “Ah yes, Jurina-san. Her suspension is really regretful.”

“Jurina is being very affected by it,” Rena started. It was no news that Jurina had always been one of the members the producer favored the best, and she was hoping the information would strike a chord.

“It was not an easy decision to make,” the producer assured. “But some pictures were unfortunately too explicit to ignore. I know it must be difficult for her, but I hope she understands.”

Rena kept quiet when the pictures were mentioned, thinking carefully about her next move. She knew the man was not going to delve more on the matter; it was just not like him to intrude into people’s private lives. However, even if the idea displeased her tremendously, she felt she had no choice but to address the article. Her goal was to persuade the producer to have Jurina reinstated as soon as possible, and she was ready to say anything that could possibly tilt the scale.

“Lately, Jurina has been putting a lot of pressure on herself because of SKE’s current difficult situation and Ayuka’s uncertain fate,” Rena explained. “That evening, I think emotions just got the best of her. I was leaving for Osaka and as we were saying goodbye, she unfortunately went a little too far.”

“I see,” the producer nodded. “You were only trying to be a good friend and comfort her.”

“Yes,” Rena confirmed without hesitation. The older Matsui was well conscious of the lies she was telling, but confessing the true nature of her relationship with Jurina was inconceivable. Did she manage to make herself convincing enough? It was hard to tell, considering no emotions transpired on the producer’s face. Nevertheless, she kept on with the little story she had studiously rehearsed inside her head. “Jurina immediately regretted the kiss and apologized afterwards, but it was too late. Pictures had been taken, and the whole scene was wrongly misinterpreted.”

“It led to many rumors,” the producer conceded. “Are you thinking of making a public statement about it? It may be helpful.”

“I haven’t decided yet,” Rena admitted. The producer’s suggestion wasn’t that surprising and to be honest, she had thought about it a few times these last two weeks. Indeed, she could declare through a short and neutral tweet that those rumors were false, and deny any romantic involvement with Jurina. In fact, her agent had advised her to do exactly that but until now she had not followed such advice, ignoring instead all questions surrounding the pictures revealed by the magazine, or the status of her relationship with SKE’s ace. 

Somehow, she was hoping for time to be their greatest ally, and believed the best action to take was to patiently wait for the storm to pass. Over time, the issue would solve itself naturally, as people would progressively lose interest in those pictures and move on to another more interesting and juicier subject.

There was also another reason why Rena wanted to use that solution as a last resort. If she made the decision of releasing a public statement, then she and Jurina would evidently need to be consistent about their declarations, which implied Jurina would also have to lie about the nature of their relationship.

Rena didn’t want to put her into that kind of situation, knowing in advance the younger girl would feel very uncomfortable about it.

“I just wanted to make sure you didn’t believe in those false allegations,” Rena spoke up again, “and that they were not the reason for Jurina’s suspension.”

“I’m touched you came all this way to clarify the situation in person,” the producer answered. “But my personal belief doesn’t have the slight importance. As you’re well aware, appearances are everything in this business. It’s only a temporary setback and I know Jurina will bounce back from that. This evening, I’m having a meeting with SKE’s management and I’m going to suggest her reinstatement.”

Rena widened her eyes slightly at the new piece of information. “You are?”

“Of course,” the producer replied, a small smile falling on his lips for the first time since the beginning of the meeting. “It may not be immediate, but I can’t imagine SKE48 without her.”

A knock on the door was suddenly heard, and the producer diverted his attention to his assistant who had opened the door, and was announcing him the arrival of his next visitor. Once the door was closed again, the actress understood their meeting was coming to an end, although the man showed no sign of being in a hurry as he didn’t move an inch from his chair. “Is there anything else you wished to discuss?”

“No,” Rena shook her head slightly. “I’m thanking you again for receiving me.”

After that, the older Matsui followed the producer as he moved towards the door, a little startled when – as he was in the process of turning the handle – he suddenly halted midway and turned instead to face her. “Jurina-san is really lucky to have someone who would go to such length to protect her career. She made an unfortunate judgment error, but people are willing to forgive her because it was her first mistake. However, I fear they may not be so lenient if it ever should happen again.” 

The producer’s tone was as even as usual and not alarming in the slightest but Rena read between the lines easily, and understood perfectly well the message he was sending. The moment after, he was opening the door, and she gave him one last polite bow as she made her way out. The last words he had uttered refused to leave her as she walked away from his office, her face darkening little by little at the producer’s clear warning.

 



 
 

When Rena arrived in front of her apartment late that evening, her fingers paused midway as she was about to turn the key in the lock, startled to perceive some strange noise coming from the inside of her apartment. Only very few people had access to her place, and it definitely didn’t sound like Airi to come to her place unannounced, even less to enter her apartment in her absence and without informing her beforehand. 

Rena listened attentively – almost believing it may only be the fruit of her imagination when the noise had suddenly ceased – before realizing she had definitely not imagined things when she clearly heard footsteps. Saying she was very confused would be the understatement of the year, and great curiosity added itself to her initial confusion as she finally penetrated her apartment. The key almost slipped from her fingers when she pushed the front door and saw Jurina, her 19 years old girlfriend, standing in the living room.

Before she had time to process the incredible scene she was witnessing or even utter a single word the latter was already reducing the distance between them, a beaming smile on her lips when she pulled her into her arms. “It’s finally over,” Jurina exclaimed cheerfully, “One more week, and I’m reintegrating the group.”

Rena let the piece of information sink in, understanding by her statement that the producer had succeeded in influencing positively SKE’s management during his meeting. Relief filled her chest at the undeniably very good news, but she soon pulled away when she remembered Jurina’s unexpected presence in her apartment. “Jurina… What are you doing here?”

Surprise flashed through Jurina’s eyes as she was visibly caught off guard by her question, but it was only brief as her initial enthusiasm quickly resurfaced. “It was such good news,” she explained, “I wanted to tell you in person.”

“It is very good news,” Rena confirmed. “But why didn’t you tell me this over the phone?”

This time, Jurina’s smile vanished completely. “I don’t understand what’s the problem,” she confessed. “Are you not happy to see me?”

“Of course, I am,” Rena’s features softened, and she slipped her fingers inside hers, giving her hand a light squeeze. “But you’re taking some risks by coming here. We agreed not to see each other until things have settled down.”

“Didn’t you listen?” Jurina frowned in perplexity. “I just told you management was lifting my suspension… We have nothing to fear anymore. It’s over.”

“No, it’s not,” Rena argued, shaking her head in a mixture of disapproval and incredulity. “It’s not over until you’re officially reinstated and got your position back. It’s not over until people keep talking about the pictures. It’s not over until there’s a risk of some paparazzi still following us and invading our privacy.”

Considering Jurina’s speechless expression Rena could tell the younger girl was completely taken aback by her words, and it was obvious they were not on the same page right now. The older Matsui let out a small frustrated sigh and turned on her heels, feeling a certain pair of eyes watching her every move as she removed her coat and shoes in the hallway. The atmosphere of the room had suddenly shifted and became way heavier, but none of them dared to speak. 

Rena was doing her best to keep her composure, but she still couldn’t believe Jurina had acted in such a reckless way. To top it all, she didn’t even seem to realize at all she had done something wrong. Had she already forgotten the pictures had been taken only a few minutes away from her apartment?

“You’re acting strangely,” Jurina murmured tentatively after a little while. “Did… something happen today? Did someone talk to you about the pictures?”

Rena had her back turned when the silence was broken, and her previous meeting with Jurina’s producer immediately submerged her mind. For an instant, she thought of disclosing the content of their conversation - believing it may help Jurina understand her point of view - but in the end, she decided to stick to her initial resolution, and not mention her meeting with him. 

“No,” Rena replied, finally turning around to face her. Jurina’s lost expression didn’t go unnoticed and she walked towards her, bringing them closer by wrapping her arms around her neck. “I’m really happy for you, Jurina,” she murmured softly and sincerely. “But as you said yourself, there is still one week left. I just think we need to stay very cautious. Do you understand?”

Rena’s question didn’t receive an immediate answer, until Jurina’s small voice resonated in the quiet apartment, “You’re right, I shouldn’t have come…” she uttered in realization. “I’m sorry. I didn’t… I didn’t think. Do you want me… to leave?”

Rena pulled back at Jurina’s words, astonished she would make such a suggestion. When she read the remorse inside her eyes, she knew her girlfriend had now truly realized her mistake, and was obviously trying to find a way to correct it. It’s too late now, Rena thought inwardly, but she didn’t see the use of voicing such thought out loud. It would only serve to increase her girlfriend’s culpability.

“It’s fine,” Rena shook her head at her, her mouth tugging into a small reassuring smile as she cupped her cheek gently. “Stay. Stay for the night.”

Despite the offer, the older Matsui didn’t miss SKE’s ace hesitant look, and she knew she was now truly considering leaving when her eyes flickered a few times to the front door. Nevertheless, the thought of letting Jurina go didn’t even occur to her now that she was here, and they had not met in two weeks.

The older Matsui reached for her hand and – after a first light tug during which Jurina’s feet refused to move – managed to successfully lead her where she wanted after another more insistent one. Once the bedroom door was closed behind them Rena made her intentions clear by pushing her gently towards the bed, and pressing her lips against hers. Even though Jurina didn’t show any real opposition to her actions it took her couple of seconds to reply to the kiss, and a few other more to have her relaxing completely beneath her.

Tomorrow, Rena knew her mind was going to be filled with a few worried thoughts – the producer’s recent warning clearly among them – but she refused to think about any of that right now. Tonight, she had a completely different goal in mind. It was hard to tell when they would be able to see each other again, that’s why Rena was well decided to take advantage of Jurina’s unplanned visit to take care of her and shower her with affection.






TO BE CONTINUED
My WMatsui fanfics:

HEARTBEAT trilogy
- Heartbeat | Completed
- Partners | Completed
- Destiny | Ongoing

OTHER FANFICS
- Back in Time | Ongoing
- Warriors | On hiatus (will return in December 2017)
- One Shot collection: Her Sun | Completed
- Fire and Water | On hiatus

Feedback is deeply appreciated, and comments motivate me to write!

Offline Genkikid

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I'm happy that Jurina is going to be reinstated soon. But since the ark has not yet done, that means the problem has not yet done  too

Offline Minami-chan

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Thank you very much for the new chapter.
I am very glad that Jurina is reintegrating the group.
Although I'm afraid that Rena has gone to mediate for her with Akimoto-san.

Offline Guacamoolee

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Wow I never thought that Rena would go this far for Jurina's sake though she knew that Jurina might not approve of what she done. I wonder what will happen if Jurina find out about what Rena did. I hope Jurina will never find out about it :sweatdrop: :bow:

I thought Jurina would leave Rena's apartment immediately after she had told Rena about the "good news" but....  :kekeke:
Can't wait to read the new chapter!
See you S!

Cheerio~

Offline sophcaro

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Author's note: This is not the full version of the chapter, I had to cut out a portion of the first part in order to publish the chapter on JPHIP. If you wish to have access to the original version, you can read it HERE.

As usual, feedback is always appreciated, and comments motivate me to keep writing  :)





CHAPTER 19



Rena had been awake for almost half an hour now, but she had fallen deep in thoughts the moment she opened her eyes. Yesterday, when she had pulled Jurina into the bedroom she had successfully managed to brush all worried thoughts aside, but they were now surfacing progressively as a new day was starting. Jurina was supposed to join back SKE in a week or so, and her deepest wish was to see her reinstatement happening smoothly and without any unplanned delay.

In a couple of hours, they would unfortunately need to part, without truly knowing exactly when they would be able to meet again. Today, Rena had a few engagements, but for now she decided to stay a little longer in bed, not wanting to leave nor to wake up her girlfriend who was sleeping peacefully beside her, and whose left arm was currently wrapped loosely around her waist.

It was way past 9 AM and, as the morning light was illuminating the room through the window’s black curtains, Rena’s attention fell distractedly on the familiar clothes scattered on the floor. Memories of their previous lovemaking submerged her mind, and a small sigh left her lips in content. A few years ago, she would definitely have been very frustrated – and admittedly also a little upset - at such a terrible mess. After all, Rena Matsui was a neat and organized person who disliked disorder to a great extent.

This morning, the view didn’t provoke any of these usual negative feelings. Instead, it only managed to provoke amusement, and bring a small knowing smile to her lips.

Rena got distracted from her musing when she felt the hand that was until now resting casually on her stomach starting caressing her skin, the hold around her waist suddenly tightening. The subtle change in Jurina’s breathing was the last indication that the girl behind her was stirring up progressively, and she replied to the gesture when Jurina found her hand easily, and laced their fingers together.

“Hi…” Jurina’s small, groggy voice sounded behind her as she pressed their naked bodies closer together.

“Morning,” Rena murmured back, humming lightly in approval when a kiss was placed against her shoulder, followed by a few lingering ones against the nape of her neck.

The older Matsui definitely didn’t mind the morning attention her girlfriend was giving her, but soon got alarmed when teeth replaced the sweetness of Jurina’s lips, the latter making her intent very clear as she started nibbling softly onto the exposed skin of her neck.

“Jurina,” Rena tensed a little, clutching Jurina’s fingers in warning. “I have a photoshoot today.”

“Oh…” Came Jurina’s pensive reply. “I’ll make sure your skin stays absolutely pristine, then.”


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After taking a warm shower and putting a pair of fresh clothes on Rena stepped out of the bathroom, her eyes falling instantly on the younger girl who was still lying in bed. The view made her pause in thoughts, and she contemplated letting her rest a little more. Unfortunately, Rena was well aware that Jurina had not been sleeping very well lately. Her suspension had had a terrible impact on her emotional state, and she suspected she may have had more than a few sleepless nights these last two weeks.

Rena approached her side of the bed to check if she was indeed still sleeping, but a pair of sleepy eyes fell on her as soon as she was close enough. “You can still sleep a little longer if you want,” Rena offered gently, “There’s no rush.”

“No,” the younger girl shook her head slightly, pulling the bedsheet up with her as she rested her back against the headboard. “I just need a shower… I’ll be fine.”

“Alright…” Rena relented, even though the small yawn escaping Jurina’s lips clearly indicated she could definitely afford a little more sleep. “Join me in the kitchen when you’re ready?”

After placing a kiss on her lips, she turned on her heels and moved towards the door, but didn’t have time to make her way out that Jurina was already addressing her again. “What happened to your ring?”

Rena stopped dead in her tracks. Even though she knew in advance that her ring was indeed not on her finger as it should be, she couldn’t help but look down to her hand out of reflex. Rena nibbled on her lower lip nervously, now realizing the tricky situation she was unexpectedly facing. Jurina’s innocent question was nothing but legitimate; she wore everyday Jurina’s ring since she gave it to her as a present in Kyoto.

However, the recent unfortunate events had led her to make a few changes in her daily routine; removing her ring being one of them.

“It’s… in my drawer,” Rena replied unconvincingly.

Rena squeezed her eyes shut in frustration at her poor attempt of an answer, knowing very well her explanation was never going to satisfy her girlfriend’s curiosity completely. A prediction that got confirmed a few seconds later when Jurina spoke up again, her confusion manifest. “Why? Is there a problem with it?”

This time, Rena turned around to face her, suddenly feeling very tense. For a while, she simply locked gaze with her without saying anything, pondering on the best way to broach this conversation. Jurina was currently looking at her in concern, and Rena knew she owed her a better explanation. However, much as she mulled it over in her head, she deeply feared the younger girl was not going to appreciate very much what she was about to divulge.

Rena retraced her steps back to the bed, a little ill-at-ease when she took a seat on the mattress next to her. “There’s something I forgot to tell you,” she started tentatively. “When the magazine revealed the pictures and I came back from Osaka, I thought it was best to take my ring off for a little while. You see, I didn’t want-”

“Wait,” Jurina interrupted her. “Are you telling me you haven’t been wearing it at all these last two weeks?”

“Yes…” Rena nodded cautiously, not missing the way Jurina’s face had suddenly darkened at her admission. “I didn’t want to draw more attention on us. If they noticed we were both wearing matching rings, it could have made things worse, and I didn’t-”

“So… you removed your ring,” Jurina repeated as if to make sure she had understood well, staring in bewilderment at the absent jewelry on Rena’s index. “When were you planning on informing me about this new… strategy?”

“Jurina…” Rena murmured, clearly seeing that her girlfriend was now very displeased, even though she was doing her best to keep her emotions in check. “You don’t need to take it off as well; I know how much it means to you. It’s only temporary. I’ll put it back once things have settled down.”

“How much it means… to me?” Rena realized her terrible mistake when Jurina stared back at her in incredulity. “Please tell me you didn’t just say that.”

“No, I didn’t…” Rena cursed herself for her very bad choice of words, and she quickly tried to backpedal. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. Of course, it’s important to me. What I meant is; I was just trying to be careful. For both of us.”

As Rena kept talking, she realized progressively that nothing she was saying was having any positive impact on her girlfriend. In fact, the latter was not even looking at her anymore and, even though she kept quiet the whole time, Rena could practically see her fuming inside. Now very worried, Rena reached out for her hand, hoping the physical contact would help where the words were failing, but Jurina quickly retracted her hand at her approach.

“I get it,” Jurina snapped. “You don’t need to explain it.”

Rena watched in astonishment the younger girl who was now getting out of bed, and retrieving with a certain haste her clothes from the red carpet. “I’m going to take a shower.”

“Jurina,” Rena stood up in alert, following the younger girl who was now moving towards the bathroom. “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to make you upset. I promise I’ll put it back soon. So please-”

“It’s alright,” Jurina replied back instantly. “I’m not mad.”

“Yes, you are…” Rena refuted, pained by her refusal to meet her gaze. “And I understand, it’s my fault. I should have warned you about my decision, and I shouldn’t have said those words right now. I love that ring, you know that…”

The older Matsui extended her arm to try and touch her, but the other girl had already pushed the bathroom door and stepped inside, only pausing a brief moment to address her one last time. “Once I’ve finished my shower, I’ll head home. I just remembered that I have a few things to do.”

“Wait…” Rena tried desperately to hold her back, much in vain as the younger girl had already shut the door close behind her, making it more than clear that she didn’t wish to pursue that conversation.

Rena stood speechless in front of the door, not believing how badly the morning had brusquely turned when it had started so nicely. She didn’t blame Jurina at all; she was the only one responsible for what had happened. For an instant, she thought of following Jurina inside the bathroom to seek forgiveness. She didn’t wish to let their conversation end in such a bad way; even less see Jurina leave her apartment much sooner than planned, and while being still angry at her.

However, if there was one thing experience had taught her, is that little you could say or do could sway Jurina when she was so worked up about something. Much as she disliked that option, Rena knew she had no other choice but to leave her alone for now, and resume that conversation later when she would have hopefully cooled down a little.

To her biggest surprise, the bathroom door opened slowly. Rena raised her eyes in expectation to the younger girl who had appeared and who now seemed a little more appeased, and far less upset than before. “I understand why you’re trying to be cautious, and I’m not mad at you for not wearing it,” Jurina murmured, letting out a small sigh. “I just wish you stopped hiding things. I know you don’t mean to hurt me but… it does.”

Rena reduced the small distance between them and wrapped her arms around the younger girl, knowing she had already been forgiven when the embrace was returned without hesitation. Guilt washed over her at the mixture of frustration and pain in her girlfriend’s voice, knowing deep down she was perfectly right. It was one bad habit of hers; one she wished she could get rid off easily. 

Patterns were sometimes so hard to break.









Rena let her gaze wander around the street absent-mindedly, waiting patiently for the person she was supposed to meet to arrive. Frankly, it had taken her by complete surprise when she had received that call, and her interlocutor had voiced her request to meet her. Despite having no idea why the older woman wished to see her, she had accepted quickly, and they agreed to meet this afternoon in a small café of Nagoya.

It wasn’t the first time they saw each other; they had met on many occasions when she was still a member of SKE. However, never had they been completely alone during one of those meetings. Besides, she believed the timing to be a bit… strange. It had now been almost three weeks since Bunshun released an article about she and Jurina, and the latter was supposed to reintegrate the idol group in a few days.

If there was one thing that experience taught her, is that coincidences were very rare.

The older Matsui got pulled out of her thoughts when she heard a feminine voice calling her name, and she studied the elegant woman now standing in front of her. Long dark hair falling down her beige jacket. A youthful face that deceived people easily about her age, and made her look in her thirties when she had in reality already reached 47.

Rena inclined her head respectfully, the woman’s smile so contagious that she couldn’t help but reply to it. “It’s nice to meet you, Matsui-san.”

“How long have we known each other?” the woman chuckled softly. “Please call me Yumiko.”

Rena followed the older woman inside the café, both settling down at a small table in a secluded area at the back of the room. There were never many people on a Thursday afternoon, so Rena was not really surprised by the peacefulness of the place.

In general, Jurina’s mother great kindness always put her at ease very fast when she found herself around her. It was so easy to engage in a conversation with her, and the woman was nothing but friendly and charming. However today, Rena was feeling unusually stressed. Indeed, as they both looked down to the menu to order something to drink, Rena couldn’t help wondering why Jurina’s mother had requested to meet her today, and alone.

“When was the last time we met?” Jurina’s mother questioned once they both made their choice, and the waiter left with their order. “Wasn’t it a little after you announced your graduation?”

“I think so…” Rena replied thoughtfully.

“Yes, it was,” Yumiko nodded in assurance. “I remember it now… It was such a terrible period. Jurina was so affected by your graduation.”

The statement was followed by a pregnant pause, and the older Matsui’s unease increased a notch, having no idea what she was supposed to reply. Why was Jurina’s mother suddenly mentioning such a painful memory? She was already aware of all those things; and eight months had already passed since her graduation. Those difficult times were behind them, now. At least, that’s what she hoped.

“I tried to tell her that you would still be able to see each other but she was completely inconsolable,” Yumiko continued after a little while, her eyes not leaving the cup of green tea that had just been placed in front of her. “I had never seen her in such a devastating state; not even when Mariko-san left AKB. It was as if her whole world had just crumbled down. Of course, I knew how attached she was to you, but I had never seen her crying so much for a friend before…”

Rena held her breath when Yumiko lifted her gaze, praying this conversation was not taking the direction she was beginning to fear. Her fingers clenched tightly around her own cup, the pleasant warmth emanating from the beverage failing completely to alleviate her nervousness. She was doing her best not to let her emotions transpire nor to look away, but it was getting harder to maintain eye contact.

She couldn’t remember the last time she had felt so terribly uncomfortable in someone else’s presence.

“I love my daughter,” the heavy tension was broken at last when Yumiko spoke up again. “As a mother, there’s nothing more terrible than seeing your own child so sad, and being incapable of truly comforting her. I’ve been through this difficult time when you graduated, and again a few weeks ago when Jurina got suspended. This suspension really impacted her hard. I can’t imagine what would happen if she was forced to graduate from SKE.”

“Jurina’s suspension got lifted,” Rena frowned, a little confused by her interlocutor’s last words. Why was Yumiko bringing up the possibility of a graduation, when her daughter was already in the clear? There was no way Jurina had not informed her by now of management’s decision to reintegrate her. 

“She told me,” Yumiko replied, a faint smile grazing her lips. “Management is giving her a second chance, and I couldn’t be more grateful for that. But what if she makes another unfortunate mistake in the following weeks… or months? My deepest fear is that she won’t manage to get away with it so easily next time. And if she’s forced to graduate… You and I know perfectly well the terrible consequences a graduation would have not only on her emotional state, but also on her future.”

“Rena-san,” the young actress got a little startled when the older woman extended her arm on the table, and placed gently her hand around her fingers. “Jurina still hasn’t accomplished everything she wished in SKE. She’s not ready to leave the group.”

“I know…” Rena whispered back. Her gaze faltered, desperation entering her small brown orbs as she was now having a good idea of the message Yumiko was subtly trying to convey. Without realizing it, her fingers started to tremble around the cup, and she knew Yumiko had noticed it when she squeezed her hand lightly in comfort.

“You don’t know how much I wish there was another solution,” Yumiko confessed her helplessness. “The last thing I want, is to see my daughter hurting again. But she needs to take care of her future. So please… Please help me make sure she doesn’t graduate before the right time has come.”

The moment after, the fingers surrounding hers retracted, and Rena noticed the older woman getting up from her seat, and putting slowly her vest back on in the obvious intent of leaving. Incapable of formulating a single word in reply she simply listened as Jurina’s mother apologized to her, before telling her goodbye and disappearing entirely from her sight.

Rena didn’t know how long she remained motionless seated at the table. Eyes boring into her untouched and cold tea, her chest tightened in pain as Yumiko’s words rolled over in her head again and again. She had no idea what to expect when Jurina’s mother asked to meet her this afternoon. At some point during their conversation, she feared she was going to question her about the nature of her relationship with Jurina.

But it wasn’t that, because Yumiko already knew.








TO BE CONTINUED
« Last Edit: March 30, 2017, 04:23:30 PM by sophcaro »
My WMatsui fanfics:

HEARTBEAT trilogy
- Heartbeat | Completed
- Partners | Completed
- Destiny | Ongoing

OTHER FANFICS
- Back in Time | Ongoing
- Warriors | On hiatus (will return in December 2017)
- One Shot collection: Her Sun | Completed
- Fire and Water | On hiatus

Feedback is deeply appreciated, and comments motivate me to write!

Offline Genkikid

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That moment I realized Rena was meeting Jurina 's mother I have a bad feeling about what Jurina' s mother going to discuss with her. And now, Rena has another secret she's going to keep from Jurina. Well, she won't just say something like "nee, jurina. I met your mother sometime ago and she implicitly told me to break up with you so you won't have to graduate from SKE"

Offline Minami-chan

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Thank you very much for the update.
Wow ... Rena is starting to have serious problems.
Tell the truth to Jurina or hide again what is happening?

Offline thepiedoctor

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Ah meeting Jurina's mother means Rena has more things to hide once again unfortunately.
I wish she would just work everything out nicely sometimes. :(

Offline Bukiyou Taiyou

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Patterns were sometimes so hard to break.

Rena never meant to hurt Jurina's feeling, but in the end, she did the opposite by hiding things from her girlfriend. As far as I remember, it started with her not telling Jurina about her plan to graduate from SKE48, then Rena didn't tell Jurina about the kiss with the actor Yosuke for their drama, she also didn't immediately tell Jurina about the ring, and now there are two more things she has to hide from Jurina: her meeting with Akimoto-san and another meeting with Jurina's mom.

I understand that Jurina was NOT mad at Rena for not wearing the ring, she was mad because Rena kept hiding things from her.

I can't imagine if Jurina herself would later find out about both meetings Rena did. She would be angry, that's for sure. But there's one bigger problem: what if Jurina couldn't trust Rena anymore? No relationship could work without a trust.

I also understand that it's a tricky situation for Rena. But I believe that sooner or later, Jurina would eventually find out especially about Rena's meeting with Akimoto-san. I mean, Jurina would somehow meet him in some event and he could just casually mention that Rena went to his place to discuss about Jurina's situation and that she was being such a good friend.

Anyway,
I read chapter 18 and it affected my mood that I took time to comment. :on cloudeye:

The storm is strong, and it's only the beginning. They didn't meet for two weeks when Jurina was suspended from SKE48, then spent their time together for only one night only to part without knowing when they could meet each other again. The only good news is that Jurina would be back to SKE48, but it doesn't mean the storm is over yet.

I'm so curious to read what would happen in the next chapter.

Thanks for the new chapter, author-san!

Ps. :on gay: At least we also have this.

“I have a photoshoot today.”
 “I’ll make sure your skin stays absolutely pristine, then.”

Offline sophcaro

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REPLIES TO COMMENTS


And now, Rena has another secret she's going to keep from Jurina.

Ah meeting Jurina's mother means Rena has more things to hide once again unfortunately.

Thank you very much for the update.
Wow ... Rena is starting to have serious problems.
Tell the truth to Jurina or hide again what is happening?

Yeah... I don't think Rena will want to tell Jurina that she met her mom considering the content of their conversation   :sweatdrop:

Rena never meant to hurt Jurina's feeling, but in the end, she did the opposite by hiding things from her girlfriend. As far as I remember, it started with her not telling Jurina about her plan to graduate from SKE48, then Rena didn't tell Jurina about the kiss with the actor Yosuke for their drama, she also didn't immediately tell Jurina about the ring, and now there are two more things she has to hide from Jurina: her meeting with Akimoto-san and another meeting with Jurina's mom.

I understand that Jurina was NOT mad at Rena for not wearing the ring, she was mad because Rena kept hiding things from her.

Yes, you're correct, it's a pattern. Rena doesn't mean unwell, but it always comes bouncing back. And this time, Jurina is more than clearly vocal about the fact she doesn't like that pattern of hers. Will Rena learn the lesson, or the unfortunate circumstances will force her to keep on with that pattern? We'll have that answer very soon.

I can't imagine if Jurina herself would later find out about both meetings Rena did. She would be angry, that's for sure. But there's one bigger problem: what if Jurina couldn't trust Rena anymore? No relationship could work without a trust.

I also understand that it's a tricky situation for Rena. But I believe that sooner or later, Jurina would eventually find out especially about Rena's meeting with Akimoto-san. I mean, Jurina would somehow meet him in some event and he could just casually mention that Rena went to his place to discuss about Jurina's situation and that she was being such a good friend.

I can't tell if Jurina will learn one day about those two meetings but if she does, then I also wonder what could be the consequences. It's evident Jurina loves Rena deeply and is a forgiving person, but she would get hurt again. 



Thanks to Genkikid, Minami-chan, thepiedoctor, Bukiyou Taiyou for leaving a comment. Believe it or not, comments truly motivate me to not only write, but also to update on a regular basis, so I appreciate every single comment given :)
« Last Edit: April 03, 2017, 03:00:49 PM by sophcaro »
My WMatsui fanfics:

HEARTBEAT trilogy
- Heartbeat | Completed
- Partners | Completed
- Destiny | Ongoing

OTHER FANFICS
- Back in Time | Ongoing
- Warriors | On hiatus (will return in December 2017)
- One Shot collection: Her Sun | Completed
- Fire and Water | On hiatus

Feedback is deeply appreciated, and comments motivate me to write!

Offline Guacamoolee

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I suddenly remember that there will be only few chapters left for Destiny and I think I'm not ready seeing my favorite fiction is coming to an end :frustrated:
And here it comes the roller coaster of feelings for both of them.

In this case, it's so easy to assume that Jurina will have a huge trust issue towards her girlfriend in the future. But I think the reason why Rena keep doing everything based on her own decision is also because she couldn't trust Jurina either, that Jurina is still not mature enough to handle the situation herself and the possibility of Jurina being overreact towards certain situation is still high. Rena had a good intention to protect Jurina's feeling but unfortunately it never went smoothly.
I think we couldn't fully blame Rena for the pattern she had been created. It requires Jurina's behavior change too to stop this pattern. Jurina needs to prove to Rena that she has grown up and she could handle everything in cool headed state.
Just how many lessons more they needed to learn until they realize that all of them need to work together and speak up their minds????
« Last Edit: April 08, 2017, 12:37:45 PM by Guacamoolee »

Offline sophcaro

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    • sophcaro
I suddenly remember that there will be only few chapters left for Destiny and I think I'm not ready seeing my favorite fiction is coming to an end.

Hum no, Destiny is not about to end. Still many, many more chapters to come. For now, around 35 chapters are planned  :yep:

My WMatsui fanfics:

HEARTBEAT trilogy
- Heartbeat | Completed
- Partners | Completed
- Destiny | Ongoing

OTHER FANFICS
- Back in Time | Ongoing
- Warriors | On hiatus (will return in December 2017)
- One Shot collection: Her Sun | Completed
- Fire and Water | On hiatus

Feedback is deeply appreciated, and comments motivate me to write!

Offline sophcaro

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  • Faithful WMatsui shipper
    • sophcaro
CHAPTER 20



Lately, Rena had been behaving differently.

As Jurina was waiting in front of Rena’s apartment for her to open the door, those troubling thoughts submerged her mind once again. It had started more than a month ago, a little before she was reintegrated in SKE48. At first, she didn’t get alarmed by it. After her surprise visit to Rena’s apartment and the latter’s reminder that they still needed to remain cautious, they both agreed it was wiser to limit their contacts to phone calls and chats on LINE for a little while.

During this period, Rena seemed more preoccupied than usual, but Jurina didn’t think too much of it. Jurina was conscious the older girl didn’t want her to take any risk of losing a position she had barely regained in the idol group. They talked on a daily basis and, even if she missed physical interactions greatly, Jurina never doubted this phase was just temporary.

When, two weeks ago, Rena accepted that they both meet, Jurina didn’t miss how hesitant she sounded over the phone about the prospect. An observation that got confirmed when they finally were able to hold each other again after three weeks, and the older girl seemed quite… tense. Jurina had immediately questioned her about it in concern, the older Matsui confessing this whole situation was stressing her.

Jurina had done her best to reassure her that everything was going to be alright now, but nothing she said seemed to truly have any positive influence. Undoubtedly, a part of her was deeply moved that her girlfriend was caring so much about her and willing to preserve her reacquired position in SKE, but another part was confused by how badly her mood had gotten affected recently. 

Where was the girl who had embraced her tightly upon her return from Osaka, and did her best to put all her fears aside by stating with conviction that she was too precious to management, therefore they were never going to ask her to graduate? Where was the girl who had slipped many soothing words inside her ear when tears were rolling down her cheeks?

In fact, the more Jurina thought about it, the more it looked like their roles had been completely reversed. When she was the one initially pessimistic about her future and Rena the one comforting her about it, things were now the other way around. Jurina was SKE’s ace again, and her suspension already a bad memory. Confident about the future, Jurina was more than ready to move forward and put this scandal behind her. However, not the same could be said about Rena.

After more than a month, Rena was still opposed to the idea of being seen together in public. As legitimate such a reaction was following the immediate release of the pictures, Jurina believed her extreme cautiousness to make little sense, now. Mentions of the scandal were very rare, magazines and fans having visibly moved on. So why wasn’t Rena able to do the same?

Jurina lifted her gaze when she heard footsteps approaching the door, and the sound of a key turning inside the lock. The moment after, the door was opening, and Jurina took time to observe carefully the older Matsui who had just appeared. Much as she was happy to finally be able to spend this Saturday evening with her, her heart sank when she witnessed evident signs of her extreme fatigue. Indeed, her girlfriend had a strained smile on her face and circles under her eyes. This last month, she had also gotten slightly thinner.

“Come in.”

Jurina nodded and did as instructed, noticing over Rena’s shoulder that the table dinner had already been set for two. “I’m sorry, but I haven’t had time to prepare anything yet. My agent sent me a script a few days ago, and I’m supposed to give a reply on Monday.”

Jurina’s eyes flickered briefly to the opened script and the pencil laying on the coffee table, clear indication that the actress was still working on it when she rang at the door. “Don’t worry about it,” she assured, after removing her vest and placing her shoes in the entrance. “I can make dinner.”

Rena winced, shaking her head a little. “No, you already prepared dinner last time. Just give me a few more minutes, and I’ll-”

“It’s fine,” Jurina interrupted her gently. “I love cooking and you still have work to do. You can progress on it while I’m busy in the kitchen.”

Rena appeared a little reluctant about her offer as she didn’t agree immediately. Nevertheless, a smile formed on Jurina’s lips when the older girl ended up manifesting her gratitude with a ‘thank you’, her eyes following the actress who was now walking towards the living room, and taking a seat on the sofa. The moment after, she had already seized her pencil, nothing seeming truly able to distract her as she was entirely focused on the script in front of her.









“What’s the script about?” Jurina asked in curiosity, as they were now sitting at the table and enjoying the miso soup and the instant noodles she had prepared.

It was a very simple meal but unfortunately, she didn’t have a lot of food at disposal to prepare something more elaborate. Visibly, Rena had not visited the Aeon Mall in quite a while, considering how very empty her fridge proved to be. An observation that already caught her off guard when she discovered the content of her fridge two weeks ago, and she was forced to pay a quick visit to the nearby Lawson to grab a few basic ingredients. 

“It’s a drama of 15 episodes about a pair of detectives who investigate a series of murders,” Rena explained. “I got offered one of the leading roles; the part of the female detective.”

“It looks interesting,” Jurina’s eyes lightened up in interest. “Are you planning on accepting?”

“Maybe…” Rena replied absent-mindedly. “I haven’t decided, yet.”

After that, they continued to eat in silence, a despondent sigh leaving Jurina’s lips at Rena’s lack of communication. Two weeks ago, when she had visited her, she had also not been very talkative. When questioned about it, the latter had justified herself by stating she had a lot on her mind lately. There was no doubt the actress was indeed busier with work; it had even saddened her when they only briefly managed to meet for her 20th birthday.

Tonight, after witnessing the same strange pattern, she was starting to wonder if there wasn’t more to it than she was willing to say. But why would she keep anything from her? No, Rena wasn’t the most expansive person in the world. In fact, she had always made it clear that she valued her privacy above all, as well as the importance of maintaining her secret garden.

However, there was no denying she had learned to open up a little more to others over the years. Since they were in a relationship, it was unusual for Rena not to share what was on her mind, or her problems with her. Yes, there were indeed a few occurrences when she had preferred to keep some information from her, but those cases were very rare.

“I was thinking,” Jurina spoke up, catching Rena’s attention when she extended her arm to intertwine their fingers together. “Why don’t we go to the cinema next week? It’s been a while since we’ve been on a movie date, and I-”

“No,” Rena retracted her hand immediately. “We’ve already talked about this. We can’t be seen together in public.”

The tone her girlfriend had employed rendered her momentarily speechless, finding it somewhat a little… harsh. Nevertheless, she brushed it off fast, well decided to make herself heard, and not to give up on that subject easily. “I know you wanted us to be careful, but it’s already been more than a month. People have stopped talking about the pictures. No one cares anymore.”

“My answer is still no,” Rena stood up from her chair. “Stop insisting. I won’t change my mind about this.”

Jurina stared at her in incredulity, watching her while she was bringing her empty bowls to the kitchen and placing them inside the dishwasher. Once again, she was witnessing signs of Rena’s great caution, one that she believed completely unjustified after all this time. She had really tried to understand her point of view, but after such a flat refusal – another one - she couldn’t contain her frustration any longer. “You’re being… ridiculous.”

Two small brown orbs gazed back at her instantly from the kitchen. “You’re the one being incredibly naïve. Just because people don’t talk about it, doesn’t mean they have forgotten.”

“So what?” Jurina exclaimed. “How much longer are we going to keep doing this? Weeks? Months?!”

Her question didn’t receive any reply, and Jurina looked away in guilt when she realized she had unintentionally raised her voice. Oh yes, she was starting to get really worked up by this whole very frustrating situation. Taking the necessary time to compose herself, she continued once she deemed herself much calmer. “I wish we could spend more time together, and were able to go out as we used to before. Do you understand?”

Rena took a deep breath, her eyes softening slightly when she read the despair in her girlfriend’s voice. “I know. But it’s not possible right now. It’s just not… possible.”

When Rena exited the kitchen and moved towards the living room, she hastily grabbed her hand as she walked past her. At the gesture, the older Matsui stilled at once. “I only want to be with you,” Jurina murmured. “Nothing else matters. Nothing.”

The moment after, Jurina got up on her feet and pulled her gently into her arms. She didn’t ignore the way the body stiffened against her but she refused to let go, willing to convey once again her feelings for the girl who meant the world to her. “I don’t understand your decision, but I will wait as long as it takes. I love you.”

Rena returned the embrace slowly. “Let’s not talk about it anymore. Would you like to watch some TV?”

“Why not...” Jurina understood the matter was definitely over when a tentative smile plastered Rena’s tired features, and she moved towards the living room.

Following her silently, she settled down on the leather sofa by her side, her fingers encountering the remote control when the older Matsui suggested her to choose a program. Jurina flipped through the channels, and her eyes lit up as she suddenly fell on the rebroadcast of a concert. When she recognized Miwa, the lead singer of the band Dreams come True, she knew in advance her girlfriend would enjoy watching it. 

Placing the remote control back on the coffee table, she scooted closer to Rena and slipped her hand inside hers, in search of the physical closeness she had deeply missed these last weeks. Somehow, she could tell the energetic music was having a relaxing effect on her, as their previous disagreement progressively fell at the back of her head, giving her the opportunity to relish Rena’s presence and those too rare but very precious moments with her.









Airi’s mouth tugged into a pleased smile when she and Rena exited the Star Tours, one of the 3D motion simulator attractions of Tokyo Disneyland. Much as It’s a small world was definitely Rena’s all-time favorite – the attraction being unfortunately closed for renovations since the beginning of March – Airi always had a soft spot for the thrills the five-minute dynamic Star Wars attraction procured.

It was now nearing the end of the afternoon and, as the park had thankfully not been too crowded on this Saturday of late March, they had been able to visit most of the attractions they wished without making too much queue. Airi noted her friend adjusting slightly her red baseball cap over her head to protect herself from the sun, admitting the weather had been very nice today. A clear contrast with the intermittent light rain they had had these last few days. When Airi suggested to take a small break Rena agreed, and they both settled down on a nearby, unoccupied bench.

While Airi was wondering if they had time to do one last attraction before heading back to Nagoya, she couldn’t help noticing how very quiet her friend was by her side. To be honest, she could sense something was a little off with her the instant their eyes met at the train station. The smile Rena gave her as they greeted each other did little to hide her tiredness, and the illustrator grew concerned when she noticed how thinner her friend had gotten.

During the train ride, Rena hadn’t been very chatty. She had questioned her a little about her drawings and her work for Weekly Shonen Jump, but had mostly spent the time looking pensively out the window, while listening to music on her iPhone. When they arrived a while later in Tokyo, Rena didn’t seem as eager to visit the park as she would have expected. One thing was certain; Rena loved Tokyo Disneyland. Airi couldn’t possibly forget all the times she had visited it with her in the past, always amazed by Rena’s overflowing enthusiasm and the way her small brown eyes sparkled in delight.

Today, even though Rena never showed once any sign of boredom, it was obvious she wasn’t enjoying herself as much as usual. While the older Matsui was absent-mindedly watching people lining up in front of an attraction, Airi gave her a worried side-glance. Until now, she had not said anything – somehow predicting her friend would at some point share with her what was on her mind - but they had indulged in small-talk the whole day.

“Is everything... alright?” Airi didn’t like to pry, but she couldn’t keep it to herself any longer. Rena was one of the people she adored the most in this world; she had so much respect and affection for her. If something was making her unhappy, then she wanted to do her best to help her. “You haven’t said much, and I can tell something is preoccupying you.”

“I’m sorry…” Rena looked down in unease. “I was really hoping spending the day here with you would clear my head, but I realize I haven’t been very good company.”

Discovering her intuition was correct and something was truly bothering her best friend, Airi was now more than decided to uncover the truth and get to the bottom of the problem. “What is wrong? Did something happen recently?”

“It’s Jurina…” Rena started, and Airi guessed by the way she was having difficulty continuing that it had to be something really important. “These last two months, things haven’t been going so well between us.”

Airi didn’t say anything, taking time to process the revelation. Yes, she was well aware that the pictures had come as a real shock to both Matsui, and that the younger one had been very affected by her suspension from the group. However, if there was one thing she observed during a phone call she had with Rena a little before Jurina’s reinstatement was announced, is that she refused to let herself get discouraged. Everything had returned back to order. So what could possibly be the issue?

“Why?” Airi frowned a little, before wondering if it couldn’t be related to the Bunshun article. “Are you still worried about the pictures?”

“How could I not?” Rena stressed. “Jurina is convinced it’s all over and we can go on with our lives as if nothing happened, but that’s not true.”

“Well…” Airi started. “From what Churi told me, SKE is doing better. Jurina regained her center position without difficulty; fans and members don’t mention the pictures anymore. The group is recovering. Isn’t it a good thing?”

“I know the group’s situation is improving,” Rena conceded willingly. “And I couldn’t be happier about it. But two months ago, a paparazzi took compromising pictures of us and it endangered both our careers. If SKE didn’t rely so much on Jurina, she probably wouldn’t be a member of the group as we speak.”

“You think they may still be targeting you?” Airi widened her eyes in realization. “Is that what you’re afraid of?”

“I think…. I think they were clever enough to find our weak spot,” Rena swallowed, clutching at the blue fabric of her pants. “They would be very stupid not to exploit it if the occasion presented itself again.”

“I understand your point of view. I really do, but…” Airi trailed off in hesitation. “You can’t constantly be looking over your shoulder. Otherwise, it will end up affecting your mental balance, and your relationship with Jurina.”

“It’s already happening…” Rena let out in a small strangled laugh. “Jurina wants to reduce the distance between us, when I’m only trying to protect her. She doesn’t understand that, just because she was lucky to get away with it once, the risk is still real.”

“Rena…” Airi reached for her hand, giving it a comforting squeeze when she felt fingers trembling slightly inside hers. “What happened to you was horrible, but… you have no other choice but to forget about it and move on.”

“Oh, Airin…” Tears welled up in Rena’s eyes, her voice a little shaky when she turned to face her. “You have no idea how much I wish I could do that. That I would just wake up one morning, and realize this was in fact just a terrible nightmare.”

“R-Rena,” Airi couldn’t believe her eyes when she saw silent tears rolling down her cheeks. Hastily, she replayed their conversation in her head; searching for an element that could explain the escalation in her friend’s emotions and her sudden distress. When she desperately remained clueless, a little voice inside her head emerged. She had to be missing an important piece of the puzzle. “What is happening? What are you not telling me?”

“Jurina is very attached to SKE. She isn’t planning on graduating until a few more years,” Rena stammered. “I love her. These last two years, she has been my strength and my happiness. That’s why I have to make sure her wish is granted.”

“Please stop torturing yourself,” Airi begged, wiping her tears carefully one after another. “You immediately came back from Osaka to stay by Jurina’s side; you comforted her when she needed it the most. You made sure she never lost hope when her future was uncertain. There’s nothing more you can do for her.”

Airi didn’t know what to make of it when Rena suddenly looked intently into her eyes, almost as if her statement had triggered something within her. “Yes, there is.”

Airi stared at her in bewilderment, trying to figure out what she meant by those last enigmatic words. Unfortunately, she didn’t have time to question her any further that Rena was now standing up, brushing away the last remnants of her grief. “Rena?”

“Do you mind if we go back to Nagoya?” Rena murmured, giving her a small, pleading look when she turned towards her direction.

“Of course not…” Airi slowly joined her side, following her as they quietly walked towards the exit. For a little while, she considered broaching the subject again – sensing the older Matsui had not told her everything yet – before refraining herself. It had already been very painful to witness her friend’s tears; she didn’t want to take the risk of provoking new ones with her obstinacy.

If there was one thing Airi knew for certain, it was how profoundly her best friend loved SKE’s ace. For the first time in her life, Rena’s heart was beating for someone. Inexperienced in matters of love, she had inevitably made a few mistakes along the way. Their relationship hadn’t been perfect; they had experienced a few difficulties. Difficulties they always managed to overcome successfully.

That’s why, no matter the problems Rena and Jurina may encounter, Airi had no doubt they would always find a way back to each other.





TO BE CONTINUED
« Last Edit: April 12, 2017, 05:15:08 AM by sophcaro »
My WMatsui fanfics:

HEARTBEAT trilogy
- Heartbeat | Completed
- Partners | Completed
- Destiny | Ongoing

OTHER FANFICS
- Back in Time | Ongoing
- Warriors | On hiatus (will return in December 2017)
- One Shot collection: Her Sun | Completed
- Fire and Water | On hiatus

Feedback is deeply appreciated, and comments motivate me to write!

Offline Minami-chan

  • Member+
  • Posts: 557
  • Still Love You
OMG! I think problems are coming.

Offline Genkikid

  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 330
No. Don't you ever think to break up with Jurina, Rena. Please no

Offline junchan

  • Member
  • Posts: 36
  • Junchan48's second account. Yoroshiku~
Can sense something bad gonna happen. Very bad.
I'm a hardshipper of many pair! lol
Yoroshiku~

Offline Guacamoolee

  • Member
  • Posts: 33
  • Silent reader
Hum no, Destiny is not about to end. Still many, many more chapters to come. For now, around 35 chapters are planned  :yep:

Firstly, as I remember, you've ever told me that there would be 25 chapters (if I'm not misread) for Destiny (or it's Back In Time(?) please correct me if I'm wrong). But now I'm glad that you'll extend it to 35 chapters. Yay! (Though it means our Wmatsui will be dealing with difficult time much longer xD)

In this chapter I can see they starting to lose faith to each other which is very dangerous and it could worsen their relationship.
Rena, when will you tell Jurina the truth???
Jurina, when will you realize that Rena did all of these for your sake????

I don't know how long they'll keep suffering like this  :mon nyah:

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