Hopefully it's at least good...
It will be in two parts since it's long.
Edit:Its a Mess... Damn it looks all bunched up together.... the app I use to write makes it look so much better *sigh*
If I missed something or idk... Message me I guess... lol
Untitled 26 Finale (split in two cuz looong as f***)
A cool breeze hit her bare skin while she sat on the last few steps of the hospitals entrance watching very few people coming in and out of the building. She wondered what they came in for- was it a stomach ache, a simple migraine, sprained ankle, broken leg? It distracted her as she thought as to why someone was coming or leaving. Distracted her as to remembering the news she received; her fathers passing and Yuko in a coma. She recalled what the doctor said, now that her thoughts didn't preoccupy with other people walking around at four in the morning outside the hospital, he said the transplant was a success but the loss of blood and lack of oxygen caused Yuko to fall into a coma. She had no idea what to do or say, she felt like she was just going to lose someone else and she was blaming herself for it. She only kept going back to the time she decided to leave her husband. If she had not done that they wouldn't be here now, her father would be alive and Yuko wouldn't be laying in a coma. The more she thought about it the more she felt sick to her stomach.
"What are you doing out here?" She looked up to find Haruu standing before her, hands tucked into her pocket and looking tired.
"I was getting some fresh air." She responded with a gloomy look on her face.
"Haruka, what's wrong?" Haruu asked, taking a seat beside her.
Haruka shook her head and realized she was not with them all night. "Where were you?" She asked.
"Oh, I was at the police station giving them all the details of tonight. They wanted to call all of you in but I was able to convince them to wait until morning." Haruu informed her. "So, why are you out here?"
Haruka turned, her eyes glistening as she stared for a second and turned away again, staring at the street catching the color of the sky turning less darker than before. The sun was coming up soon. "My... father... he passed away and Yuko... is in a coma." The words were hard to get out but she said them with much difficulty.
Haruu was shocked to hear the news, she had no idea. "But... he seemed..."
Haruka shook her head softly. "He," she gulped back the lump in her throat, "he didn't make it through surgery."
"Haruka," Haruu reached for her hand, "I'm sorry..."
Haruka pulled her hand away, she didn't want her caring for her, not when she kept blaming herself for this mess. She felt she didn't deserve the endearment from her or anyone. Haruka's eyes locked onto the street, catching vehicles drive by and headlights bright in her eyes.
"Haruka," Haruu called out to her, watching her stare out ahead of her, almost falling into a daydream.
"Hey, where have you been?" Yui appeared with a cold soft drink in her hand for Haruka as she asked Haruu. Haruu turned to her and stood up. "I was at the police station," Haruu answered, glancing back down at Haruka and back up at Yui. "She just told me the news... I don't think she's doing very well."
Yui looked down at Haruka and took a step down to sit beside her, setting the soft drink down and catching how she stared off. "Haruka," she placed a hand on her shoulder, but she didn't react. Yui called out to her again and shook her slightly. Again, a little louder, she got her attention and Haruka finally snapped back to reality catching Yui's sharp facial features.
"It's all my fault." Haruka said to her. "I'm at fault for my fathers death and Yuko -"
"No!" Yui shouted, "this isn't your fault, we've gone through this!"
Haruka began to feel short of breath and her chest tighten. "Yui," she called out grabbing onto her. "I can't breath." She tightly gripped onto Yui's arm. "Its my fault." She repeated over and over while Yui tried to calm her, holding onto her as she did so. When she felt Haruka falling backwards, dropping the drink as it shattered, she reached her arm behind her back, catching her before she hit the steps and shouted to Haruu to go get help.
Haruka awoke dazed and confused, not sure where she was, it was dreamlike. She could see everyone around her but couldn't react. All she wanted was to shut her eyes and fall right back to sleep and she did. This went on for a few days, laying in a hospital bed falling in and out of sleep. Waking up to find Yui. She could hear her and feel her when she awoke from her sleep. Same went with Sayaka, Miyuki, Haruu, and other guests coming by. She was there watching them, rarely reacting to them but she would fall right back to sleep again.
"So, why does she come in and out like that?" Sayaka asked the doctor when it all began. At first he had said it was from shock of her loss, however, after examining her, it wasn't only that but she was overall exhausted. Her mind and body were beginning to weaken and it was tired of the sleepless nights and stress it had been going through the last year.
"It's all in her head, she needs rest." The doctor told the girls.
"Can we fly her back to Japan?" Miyuki asked.
The doctor hummed, thinking if they could. "It's possible. Only I don't want to add anymore stress to her. I'll check on her again and I'll keep you informed." With that he stepped out the room while Sayaka, Miyuki, Yui, Haruu, and Atsuko and Minami stayed, watching over Haruka sleeping.
Yui took her designated spot on the right side of Haruka, by the window so she could watch over her without the glare of the sun in her eyes when evening was approaching. She rubbed her eyes, showing fatigue while she hunched over her seat.
"Yui," Sayaka called out to her, making her way to the left side of the bed Haruka laid in. "Why don't you head to the apartment and sleep. Only for tonight." She said glancing at Haruka then at Yui who shook her head, raising it once she finished rubbing her face. "I've slept fine here." She lied. The chair was uncomfortable, it was always cold in the room, and she would wake up every hour thinking and dreaming Haruka was awake calling out to her.
"Yui, It will only be for a few hours." Atsuko spoke up.
"Yeah, Besides, she won't go anywhere." Minami chimed in.
Yui turned back to watch Haruka sleeping, her hand automatically reaching out for hers and taking a grasp of it when Sayaka heard her whisper. "What if she does?"
Sayaka was surprised to hear her say that and leaned over, quietly replying to her, "I'll stay with her." She saw how Yui looked up at her and around the room at the girls standing there. She knew they were all there to take care of Haruka, they all cared about her. But, Yui was too scared to leave her, afraid she will wake up and run away like she tried the night her father passed. She made her way back to looking at Sayaka and finally gave her a firm nod. "I'll go."
They felt somewhat relieved, they knew she could fall ill if she doesn't have the proper rest. With one last look at Haruka sleeping, she stood from her chair and bent over to give the sleeping girl a kiss on her forehead before finally leaving along with Atsuko and Minami.
"Haruka wouldn't want you falling ill like this and you know it." Atsuko said as they walked out the room.
Haruu and Miyuki stayed behind, Haruu taking a seat in the nearest chair and Miyuki telling Sayaka she would go spend some time with Haruna and Yuko. Turning to leave the quiet room, Sayaka followed behind asking Haruu to watch the sleeping girl while she spoke with Miyuki.
They stood out in the hallway and Sayaka reached for Miyuki's hand. "Are you alright?" She asked. It's been days since the two finally decided to be together. However, the distance didn't seem to change much after Haruka fell ill.
Miyuki gave her a nod, "yeah, I'm fine."
"Miyuki, you know you can tell me anything." Sayaka pleaded with her eyes, she only wanted to help her, show her she was there.
Letting out a sigh Miyuki looked down at their hands and she intertwined her fingers with hers, pulling her to take a seat in the empty bench right outside Haruka's room. "I am worrying." She admitted, her eyes shifting up to meet with Sayaka's. "Haruka..." she paused, her eyes moving away and staring down at the white linoleum floor.
Sayaka swooped her head down and caught her eyes to bring her back to her. "What about Haruka?" She asked.
Miyuki stared at her, into her eyes, this was the first time she's ever felt like she could speak to someone about her past, a time she's never told anyone about. About her mother. "My mother... Our mother, she was ill too. Mentally ill,"
Sayaka didn't flinch, she didn't retract back, she listened carefully and Miyuki saw that. "Like Shimazaki said," she continued, "she was... struggling, and I never knew why. She always put a smile on her face around me, acted like everything was fine but the closer to her breaking point the more I began to see my mother wasn't alright. I tried asking my father what was wrong but he never talked to me about it and when she finally..." she stopped and Sayaka knew she was recalling the moment her mother passed. "I never heard her name from my father after and we grew apart. I remember he was furious when I told him I was going to work for Shimazaki. We got into a huge argument and I left."
"I'd speak to him but anytime I called or visit him he always seemed so mad at me as I was at him... now I understand." She ran her other hand over Sayaka's, the one that held Miyuki's hand tightly that she could already feel her sweaty palms, but they didn't care. "My mother was ill and so is Haruka... I'm scared. I've always been scared for her since the loss of her baby but I didn't want to believe it would get this bad; i didn't want to relive that day. I ignored it and now... I'm worried she could do what our mother did and-" she choked up. "I have to take care of her. She's my younger sister and I have to take care of her."
Sayaka pulled her into her arms and Miyuki wrapped her arms around her, taking a good hold of her sweater as she tried to hold back her tears, but they were already falling, damping Sayaka's shoulder.
Yui arrived to Miyuki's apartment where the girls have been staying at instead of a hotel. Sayaka with Miyuki in her bedroom and Atsuko with Minami in Haruka's old bedroom, with Miyuki's permission, and Yui with Haruka in the hospital, never wanting to leave her sight. But now, standing here in the apartment it felt weird. She'd gotten used to being with Haruka in the hospital on her uncomfortable chair, sitting and watching her, waiting for her to wake up and greet her, and watch her fall right back to sleep.
"You'll sleep here," Atsuko spoke while Yui followed behind her to the open door leading to a simple bedroom that was once occupied by the girl who was now in the hospital. "Minami and I will sleep in the living room."
Yui stared into the bedroom, her mind flashing to a time with Haruka in bed, it made her realize how in love she was with her after these few years they had been together; though secretly. Even after such heartache she loved her, still loves her. All she wanted to do was be by her side now but...
"Yui," Minami caught her phased as she stood staring at the bedroom. "Go get some rest. We can go back tomorrow."
Yui shook her head, "no, the two of you sleep here. I can take the couch."
Minami waved her hand, "nonsense. We will be fine, Miyuki has some futons to lay out. We will sleep on those."
"Will be fine," Atsuko interrupted, "as long as I sleep beside my wife, I'll be fine." She smiled.
Yui was given a small push from Atsuko and walked into the bedroom shutting the door behind her. She took her sweater off as soon as she made her way to the edge of the bed. Winter was starting up and she didn't notice it happening, she only felt the cold kicking up. She dropped onto the edge of the bed and laid back, her head hitting the pillow. Even though the sun was barely setting she automatically felt her eyelids closing. She fought her sleep, she wanted to stay up in case they called about Haruka, but she couldn't fight it, she fell asleep instantly.
Staring out the window as the sun had finally set, Miyuki stepped back from the view in front of her and turned to find Haruna sitting in the same spot. It'd been days, and like Yui with Haruka, Haruna wasn't leaving Yuko's side, not until she woke up. Miyuki recalled the moment the doctor gave them the news, that the transplant was going great until Yuko's body couldn't take it anymore and her heart stopped beating. The doctor explained that the body had gone through too much and she had died for a minute. Because of this, oxygen couldn't reach to her brain and she fell into a coma. In the end, the transplant worked but Yuko wasn't waking up. The doctor told Haruna and the girls that she could wake up at any time but Haruna wouldn't believe it.
"Are you hungry?" Miyuki asked. She had been staring at Yuko as she remembered this, wishing she would wake up, for the sake of Haruna. It was devastating seeing Haruna depressed, sitting beside her wife gripping onto her hand, hearing her speak to Yuko and demanding for her to wake up. She's gotten to the point where she barely sleeps. "I'll bring you some food, you've barely eaten anything."
Haruna shook her head, sitting back on her chair after letting go of Yuko's hand. "I'm not hungry."
Miyuki sighed. "Please, at least something small."
Haruna looked up at her and again shook her head, "I can't eat."
"Do you think Yuko would want you starving?" She asked, walking over at the end of Yuko's bed.
Haruna turned back to her wife, knowing the answer. But if she ate she would feel sick to her stomach, she always does.
"I'll bring something," Miyuki said. "I'll be right back." And with that she left the hospital room. Haruna didn't bother to look back or tell her it was no use to get her food since she won't eat it, instead, she sat still, watching Yuko, staring every bit of her from head to toe, waiting for her to move, to show signs of life. She remembered one morning she woke up catching her finger twitch and she instantly awoke looking up at the girl and waiting for a full minute for Yuko to open her eyes. Except, it never happened. The full minute she waited felt like an eternity which she hated but she wanted it to happen again. she's been waiting for another sign to keep her wife alive, so she stared, day and night.
Sitting up on her chair, leaning onto Yuko's bedside, she reached for her wife's hand again, easing it up to her lips and planting a soft kiss before lowering her head and pressing her hand over her forehead. "Please, wake up." She whispered, raising her head and looking at the sleeping woman. "I need you. I'm sorry." She apologized for the hundredth time. Literally. "I should have listened to you. I shouldn't have gotten the job, I shouldn't have begged you to move back home. I'm sorry, Yuko... this is all my fault." Tears began to flow, "just wake up!" It was frustrating, painful, difficult to wait, wait and see if the love of your life will wake up from a coma, especially when you still have so much to do and say to them. She dropped her head and decided to lay her head on the bed, her arm extending back down beside Yuko's body as she still held her hand. She shut her eyes and continued to apologize over and over, begging for her to wake up.
"Haruna," she heard a faint voice. She ignored it while she laid with her eyes closed on the bed. "Haruna," it called out a little louder this time. Haruna seem to recognize the voice yet she couldn't lift her head to check. The voice continued calling out to her and Haruna was able to reply with a hum as soon as she knew it was Yuko repeating her name. She wanted to lift her head, see her awake, and wrap her arms around her, thanking god she was finally awake, however, Haruna couldn't move a muscle.
"Haruna," the cheery voice called out again, "sleep tight, I'll bring you food later and you better eat it all this time, that diet of yours is bad. I wish modeling wasn't so strict on your figure because I love you just the way you are!" Haruna could hear her scolding her playfully like she always does, she could sense her smile and she could definitely feel her hand interlocking with hers
And, "Haruna!" She jolted, sitting up on her chair and looking up to find Miyuki placing a brown paper bag on a table at the end of the bed. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up." She noticed her jolt once the bag was placed down.
Haruna furrowed, she could have sworn she heard Yuko's voice, she was awake. Haruna whipped her head to see if she wasn't dreaming, if her wife was really awake speaking to her. Sadly, that wasn't the case. She realized the dream was just a dream, her mind playing with her.
"Are you alright, Haruna?" Miyuki asked, watching her stare at Yuko with a deep furrow.
Haruna didn't speak, she sat still like a statue, cold and hard. Suddenly, Miyuki noticed she relaxed her face muscle as well as her body, she took a deep breath and exhaled, and she spoke up, "I'm fine..." she turned to her asking, "what's for dinner?"
It had been late in the night when the nurse came in to check on Haruka, waking Sayaka up who had fallen asleep on the chair Yui would usually sleep in. The nurse had dropped her clipboard and Sayaka jumped and opened her eyes, not completely surprised. She looked up to find the nurse as she apologized to her. Sayaka said it was okay and quickly asked how her friend was doing and she got an okay sign and the nurse left.
The room was dim, the only light on was the one on the wall above Haruka's bed. Sayaka had stared out to the dark room, waiting to see if she could fall right back asleep, but she couldn't, the nurse had woken her up for the night. So, she just sat in the chair, listening to the silence of the room, even out in the hospitals hallways. It was chilling. She looked around the room and noticed Haruu was gone, maybe she had gone off to sleep at her own place. She thought that was good since mostly all the girls haven't had the best sleeping schedules.
Making herself comfortable in the chair, she glanced over to Haruka's bed and she felt her heart almost jump out of her chest. "Haruka!" Her hand flew over the rapid beating in her chest. "You're up."
Haruka was staring at her while she laid in her bed. "What day is it?" She asked in a husky voice.
Sayaka relaxed and answered her. This was the first time she's ever asked for the day. "Did you want some water?" She asked, noticing her voice was dry. Haruka had slept almost a full twenty-four hours. Her sleeping was always different. She would be up for only an hour; laying, sometimes barely speaking to anyone, and then she would fall asleep and wake up hours later. That's what usually caused them to worry about her, was the constant sleeping and rarity of eating.
Haruka replied with a nod and Sayaka stood up, grabbing the jug of water and cup from the bedside table. Pouring the water into the cup, Sayaka placed the jug back down and waited for Haruka to sit up on her bed. She handed her the cup and Haruka quickly took a good gulp of it while Sayaka fixed her bed for her to stay sitting up. "How are you feeling?"
Haruka chugged down the rest of the water, wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, and handed the cup back as she answered, "like I've slept for days."
"You sort of have." Sayaka replied, placing the cup back in its place next to jug. "You had us worried." She sat back down. "Are you hungry?" She asked before anything else.
Haruka shook her head and leaned back on the bed. "I am cold." She spoke quietly. Sayaka remembered where the extra blankets were, the nurse had told her and the others where there were certain things in the room. She took one from a cupboard and unfolded it, throwing it over Haruka and watching it fall neatly over her.
Haruka gave a nod watching Sayaka fix the edges of the blanket, making sure she was all covered up. "What happened?" She asked. Sayaka stopped her fumbling over the blanket and glanced up.
"These last few days?" She questioned.
"I only remember parts of it..." Haruka furrowed, looking down at her blanket while she tried to remember, only they were a blur. Some moments were there, her quietly laying in bed watching the girls talking, some of doctors and nurses asking her questions she couldn't really hear. "The police came by..." she recalled.
Haruu, along with Sayaka and Miyuki, had been speaking to the police throughout the investigation. Although none of them were letting the investigators speak to Haruka, not yet. But Haruka remembers the men standing in her room, asking her questions she barely understood.
"We took care of it for now." Sayaka told her. "We've asked them to come back when your better."
Haruka glanced up at her, "what do they want to speak to me for? They were there, arrived to find Yuko and my father dying." She was getting worked up, the scenes of that night flashing in her mind.
"Haruka, they only want to get every detail-"
"They know he killed my father and put Yuko in a coma. What's the point in speaking to me?" She was riled up, Sayaka had to stop her, calm her from stressing out, like the doctor said. "Calm down, they only want to make sure they have enough evidence to send him to prison for a long time."
"Is my fathers body not enough!?"
It fell silent in the room, Sayaka staring at Haruka's anger right in her eyes. This was the first time she was more active and awake than the rest of the days. After the chilling silence, Sayaka reached for Haruka's hand, taking it into her own, and interlocking fingers, telling her it was going to be okay. "They know, they want to imprison him for good. Don't worry, Haruka." She waited for a response from her. She didn't speak, she looked away, and Sayaka never felt her hand hold on to hers tightly, she was too upset. "I'll call Yui for you. Tell her your finally up."
Haruka shook her head, "No." she shifted in her bed, turning away from Sayaka, not saying another word.
Sayaka just stared at the girls back and caught Haruka's hand still in hers, but felt her let go of it. She felt her distancing herself again, remembering what Miyuki had told her about her mother. Sayaka sighed and just sat back on her seat watching Haruka throughout the night.
The next morning, Yui woke up late into the afternoon, sitting up and taking a sharp breath of air after her sudden dream ending with the sound of a gun going off. She felt her heart racing and beads of sweat rolling down her forehead. This is one of the reasons she stayed in the hospital with Haruka, because each time she closed her eyes the same dream would turn into the nightmare they lived through that night on the rooftop that overlooked the beautiful city. There, in the hospital, she could stay up watching Haruka all night, and a each time her eyes shut it was only for a little while.
When she turned to check the time on the clock on the bedside table she was surprised to find she had slept more than her usual eight to nine hours. She cursed under her breath and her hands flew over her face, rubbing away the tiredness that still lingered. Throwing the covers off of her, she jumped out of bed and made her way out to find Minami and Atsuko sitting on the couch dressed like they were ready to head out.
"Good sleep?" Minami asked.
"You should have woken me up." Yui complained. "I slept all day."
"We didn't want to wake you, you needed the sleep." Atsuko said.
"I don't need that much sleep. I still need to go check on Haruka." She remembered. In a hurry she turned back to the bedroom and grabbed some clothes from her luggage before heading into the shower. The couple stood from the couch trying to tell her to relax but they only got a door close before them.
When Yui arrived to the hospital she found Sayaka sleeping on the chair she would normally sleep in, with her feet up on at the end of Haruka's bed and a hospital blanket covering her from her shoulders to just below her knees. Yui quietly made her way to Haruka's bedside, greeting the sleeping girl. She watched her quietly in hope that she would wake up except she was surprised that it was Sayaka who woke up with a sudden gasp of air.
Yui turned to find her sitting up on the chair, just at the edge as her hand flew over her chest. She caught the look she had, someone who just woke up from a nightmare. She made her way to her asking her if she was okay. Sayaka looked up. "How long was I asleep for?"
"I just got here, I'm not sure." Yui shrugged. She watched how Sayaka tried to calm her heartbeat, regulate her breathing. She must be having the same nightmares, Yui thought. "Did you have a bad dream?" She asked, wanting to make sure.
Sayaka looked back up giving her a nod. "After that night, my mind keeps playing it in a loop. Most nights I go to sleep and not have a single dream but others... it's nightmare after nightmare." She took a deep breath in and exhaled.
Yui watched her, she wanted to tell her she goes through the same thing, except her dreams are always bad. She's even had one where she watches Sayaka get shot and she can't even reach her. She remembers she woke up promising herself she would forgive her, promises to go back to how it was before. Sayaka had been her best friend for so long and now, she's been living months hating her and each time the scene of Sayaka being injured makes her feel sick, she could say she hated her for what happened but honestly she was still her best friend, the girl she use to hang out with and act like two pairs of fools always laughing and talking on and on with no stop, as well as being each others support.
"Are you alright?" Sayaka asked, staring up at a pale face Yui. "You look sick."
Yui had not realized she had been lost in her own thoughts, replaying her horrendous nightmares as she stared down at the tile. "Actually..." she hesitated, she didn't know why but she did, maybe because saying it outloud would hurt more than thinking it. "I've had them too. Only, mine play out differently."
Sayaka never thought Yui was having nightmares or struggling after that night, she always seemed... fine. "How?" She asked.
Yui let out a small chuckled, almost sounding like a breath of air. "There's one where you..." She looked away, staring down at the cold floor like before. She had a hard time with the words. "Where you are shot."
Sayaka stared up at her friend, "But I wasn't." she stated. "I'm here, you're here." she waited for her to look at her before continuing. and she did. "Those are nightmares, our what if's... but that didn't happen. Let's just be glad we are still here and we have to be here for Haruka, the two of us, despite everything that's happened." Sayaka wanted to make her feel better which was working.
Yui nodded, "Yeah... About all that... I want to leave it behind, start fresh again. Just thinking of those dreams, my 'what if I lost you', I wouldn't know what I would do. I think no matter what you're still my best friend... despite of everything."
"I'll always be here for you, starting fresh and all." Sayaka gave her a small smile and Yui returned it. In a way this was a help for the two from their nightmares but also to just go back to how it was before; being friends.
"One thing... don't tell Haruka when she wakes up about my nightmares, yeah?" Yui asked.
Sayaka curiously looked at her wanting to ask why but she only agreed to not sayig aything. "Sure."
When Miyuki awoke from her slumber, she found Haruna coming into the room with a bag. She sat up rubbing her tired eyes, curious as to where she could have gone, she hasn't been the one to leave the room even when the nurses begged her to.
"Morning." She greeted.
Haruna was surprised to find Miyuki awake. Nevertheless, she greeted her. "Good afternoon."
Miyuki looked up at the clock and ignored the fact it was afternoon."Where did you go?" She asked, watching Haruna place the plastic bag on Yuko's bedside.
"I went for a walk and got us some breakfast." She reached into the bag and took out small sandwiches and some juice. She placed it aside and reached into the bag once more. "I also stopped by the gift shop and found this." Haruna pulled out a snow globe, giving it a quick shake.
Miyuki stood from her spot, making her way to Haruna and taking a look at the globe. "It's a small house." Haruna shook the globe again, snow falling over it.
"It's pretty." Miyuki commented.
Haruna gave a firm nod. "Yuko's always wanted to own a house where it snows. We use to go in Japan up to the mountains but when we came to Paris we had no time to go anywhere. She missed snowboarding up on the mountains and she had mentioned before she would like to own her own house where it snowed." She watched the last of the fake white snow fall over the house in the globe and placed it down on the table, fixing it perfectly for the house to face Yuko's bed. "I know this about her and much more... but I never knew about her past."
Miyuki saw the glint in her eye as she looked back up at her from the globe, her expression changed. "I know how she picks out the onion from her meals, how she never lets her foods touch in her plate, I know how she likes to do little jumps when she's putting her jeans on, I know that before sleep she stares at me... she always stares at me like I was the only one she wanted to dream about... I know all these things but I never knew what she had to do when she was younger. I never asked because I learned never to ask after her short answers. She would always change the subject but I never suspected a thing." Miyuki could see Haruna stare past her and right to Yuko. "she knows me more than I know her... doesn't that just mean she loves me more, cares for me more than I do her?"
"Don't say that!" Miyuki retorted, "You love her just as much, I can see that. Anyone in this world can see that!"
"Then why do I feel like I didn't try hard enough to love her and care for her? She knows everything about me and I only know the half of it, the only half she's had with me." Haruna grazed by Miyuki to stand over Yuko, listening to the machines beeping in the room. "I should have-" she balled her hands into fists, her knuckles turning white.
"Haruna, She loves you and you love her about as much. If not, you wouldn't be here day and night losing sleep over her, going hungry," Miyuki picked up the breakfast she bought them and turned to face Haruna's back. "And, this half of her life, with you, is probably what she wants to remember the most rather than her past. She probably wanted to make new memories to forget the old ones. Build a new family. A better one. With you."
It was probably true. Her wife probably wanted to create some better future than her past, guessing that that was the reason why Yuko came up with having a big family all the time, always talking about trips and taking the kids snowboarding and playing sports. Haruna relaxed, her fists opening up and fingers stretching out. "She wanted to forget it all..." she said, reaching for Yuko's hand. "Build a better life." She spoke to Yuko now instead of Miyuki. Pulling up the chair beside her, she sat, her hands wrapping around Yuko's, bringing it up to her lips. "We will have a better life, a good family..." she muttered, "just wake up... please." She desperately whispered, before planting a kiss on the back of Yuko's hand, letting her tears fall while she sat waiting for her wife to wake up.
Miyuki left Haruna for awhile knowing she shouldn't be there now and maybe a visit to Haruka would be good anyways, especially to check in on Sayaka, knowing that most likely she would forget to eat. Just as she made her way in Haruka's room she was surprised to find Yui instead of Sayaka. Yui looked up giving her a faint 'hey' and Miyuki returned it with a smile.
"If you're looking for Sayaka, she went to get us some food." Yui noticed she walked in expecting to find the other young woman.
"Good. I actually came to make sure she ate and slept." Miyuki said, making her way towards Haruka's bed. She stood beside the bed and looked down and the sleeping girl, automatically thinking she looked so young and fragile. Looked like a little sister.
"Sayaka told me she woke up last night." Yui interrupted her thoughts, she watched her head whip up and catch her standing across from her. "She said she was more alert, talking more. Mentioned how she remembered a few things here and there. She also became upset over the police coming by."
Yui responded with a nod.
"And she hasn't woken up today?"
Yui shook her head. Miyuki turned back to Haruka, wishing she could just wake up and get better but she knew it wasn't that easy, her mind picturing their mother laying there. "She looks like her." She muttered. Yui heard her and asked her who. "Like our mother. I see it now."
"Is it still a shock?" Yui asked. She tried to keep the small talk going, she wasn't liking the silence when it was just the two of them.
"To find out she's my half sister?" She paused. "Not really... it makes total sense to me now."
"You two are close."
"Yeah. I felt something towards her but I ignored it until we lived together here in Paris. I realized we were closer than I expected. At one point I thought it would've turned into a crush." Miyuki giggled. "Imagine that?"
Yui let out a breath and smiled. "If all this is dramatic imagine adding that to it."
The two laughed, their stiff bodies becoming loose and the two began talking between one another, and after a moment, they heard light footsteps walk into the room. The two turned to find Haruu greeting them with a small smile.
"Hey," Miyuki greeted. "You've been sleeping all day?" She smiled at her.
Haruu shook her head and didn't return a smile, she was looking rather serious and it concerned Miyuki. "I actually came back from meeting my mother. She is here in Paris."
"Oh?" Miyuki questioned.
"Actually, she might have to take your position in the company." Haruu told her.
"What?" Miyuki replied, shocked and confused.
"Right now, no one is looking after the company and I found out my mother had actually helped Haruka's father start up his company. He signed her as a private co-owner. She will be in charge, at least until Haruka wakes up and the lawyer goes over her fathers will." Haruu explained.
"Wait," Miyuki said, "but I was left in charge of the company here. Why not stay in Japan?"
"Well, this is where the problem started. Someone had been taking money from the company-"
"someones been taking money?" Miyuki asked. "Who?"
"My ex-husband." They suddenly heard a familiar voice, turning to find Haruka had woken up. More surprised she was listening to them talking. "Who else would do that?" Haruka began sitting up and quickly Yui and Miyuki stared at her for a moment before rushing to help her.
"Hey, your still not well." Yui told her as she placed a hand on her back. "Take it easy."
Haruka felt a bit of a struggle but she told Yui she was fine, assured Miyuki she would be okay after noticing she held her hand tightly. "I want to speak to Haruu alone."
"What?" Yui asked.
Haruu protested, "not now, Haruka, you just woke up. The doctor told us to make sure you take it easy."
"I need to know what's going on with the company. I won't let it go down after everything that's happened."
"Haruka," Miyuki muttered her name. She worried over her. "This isn't the time. I'll figure it out, just let me do it."
"I feel fine." Haruka slightly pushed away the two girls helping her sit up. "Please. I promise I won't stress out too much. How about you two ask the doctor when can he release me."
Miyuki and Yui exchanged worried looks but they didn't want to go against her. Letting her go the two agreed to leave them, as long as Haruu makes sure she takes it easy which she promised she would be the first to make sure Haruka will be alright. The two stepped out, closing the door behind them, and went off to find Haruka's doctor.
Sayaka returned, walking out of the elevator and making it down the hall to Haruka's room. She had a brown bag in her hand, smelling the hot food in it. She did not realize how hungry she was after not eating since yesterday evening. She also knew that if she didn't have a bite Miyuki would scold her for it. Just as she neared the room she spotted Yui and Miyuki with the doctor. She did feel a little nervous, thinking something was wrong, but as she neared them she ended up overhearing them.
"She can set out tomorrow? Are you sure?" Miyuki was asking.
Sayaka stopped behind her and Yui and spoke up, "what's going on?"
The two girls turned, not surprised she seemed to appear out of nowhere. Before Miyuki and Yui got into explaining what was happening, the doctor spoke. "I'll check how she is today and overnight. If she looks well enough to leave, I'll discharge her in the afternoon."
With that the doctor went back to working, checking other patients, while Yui and Miyuki looked at each other then turned to Sayaka. "So, she is fine to fly back to Japan?" She asked.
"She just woke up," Yui said. "He had told us he can transfer her to a hospital in Japan, but since she is up now, he would keep an eye on her to see if she is well enough to be discharged." Yui explained.
"Well, that's good news." Sayaka said, looking at the two and noticing their they weren't as glad as she was to hear the news.
"I'll go see if Haruu is done with Haruka." Yui said, walking past Sayaka, the two other young women watching her go. Sayaka turned back to Miyuki when Yui got to Haruka's door. She noticed Miyuki folding her arms as one hand rubbed up and down her shoulder, looking away. Sayaka knew she was losing herself in her thoughts. "I thought it was good news to finally discharge Haruka. She is awake and everything."
Miyuki still didn't look at her but she heard her, only she wasn't responding.
"Miyuki," Sayaka took a step closer to her. "Tell me what your thinking about? Your mother?" She could read her face of worry, it looked similar to the one from yesterday when she spoke about her past.
"What if she doesn't want to get any help back home? It was a struggle enough here to get her to finally talk to someone who could help and look where it's lead her." Miyuki spoke in almost a whisper, not wanting to startle people in the quiet corridors. "I'm just worried..."
"And you have every right to be," Sayaka placed a hand over her arm, just below her hand where she was rubbing her shoulder. "But I think between us, Yui and Haruu, we can at least speak to her about giving it a try."
"When she woke up she jumped right into talking about the company, Haruu is in there talking to her now over who is taking over for now."
"Wait, what?" Sayaka's brows furrowed, she was confused.
Miyuki sighed, remembering Sayaka had no idea what had occurred. "Haruu's mother will be handling the company from Paris, at least until Haruka gets better."
"Her mother helped start the company, she is a co-owner." Miyuki explained. "And I am back to being a designer."
"But you've been running the company here, you should know it better than us." Sayaka said.
"Honestly, right now, I shouldn't be running anything... I'm too tired." Miyuki confessed. After these last few days she, herself, was feeling exhausted. She was trying to stay strong but she only worried about Haruka and Yuko and Haruna. Even Yui and Sayaka. Everyone's gone through so much and she's noticed she hasn't been feeling right since the night of the fashion show; she's been having dreams that she can't remember but she wakes up with her heart beating like crazy. "I just want this to be over already." She rubbed her tired eyes and Sayaka didn't hesitate to pull her into a hug. Miyuki didn't hesitate either and wrapped her arms around her waist, laying her head against her shoulder while Sayaka whispered to her that everything will be okay, that soon it will be all over.
When Yui walked in, Haruu was standing at the end of Haruka's bed. Yui overheard their discussion. They planned on Haruka returning to the company as soon as possible to take care of the situation. That was the last thing Yui wanted her to do, to get right into work after the kidnapping, her fathers death, Yuko, and the secrets her father kept from her, which clearly weren't over. When the two finished talking Haruu didn't stay, she had to go and talk to her mother, and before stepping out the door she caught Yui standing behind the curtain. The two didn't say a word, Haruu knew she had overheard them but decided not to point her out, it would only upset Haruka and that's the last thing she wanted. Haruu only left and Yui pretended to step back into the room. Only when she looked towards Haruka, she found her staring at her.
"You heard?" She asked.
Yui didn't deny it. "I did."
"I know it's the last thing all of you want me to do but I need all of you to understand that it's my fathers company, I can't let it go down, I can't lose it. My father has put his life into this to make it big in the fashion industry and I'm not letting one man, my ex-husband, kill this too."
Yui furrowed, though she understood where she was coming from, she still wanted to let her know it wouldn't be good for her. "Haruka, I understand it's your fathers company and you want to do everything you can for it. Especially now, but I need you to know this isn't good for you. You can't overwork yourself, look what's happened."
"I've had my rest."
Yui made her way to her bedside taking her hand. "You still have to go back, hold a funeral, deal with the media, talk to the police, and you want to add a work schedule to this?"she asked, clearly upset. "Haruka, please..."
"It's my fathers company, I need to be there." Haruka stated.
Yui felt defeated. The look in Haruka's eyes showed she wasn't backing down, she was going to do exactly what she said and go back to her fathers company. Yui furrowed, "fine... but I'm not leaving your side."
"Nothing you say will make me leave you. I can't lose you again."
"Because I love you..." Yui admitted. The room became silent and the beeping from the heart monitor at the end of the hall could be heard. There was a small croak in Yui's throat, speaking up, "I keep having dreams, nightmares," She admitted, "...of that night... and it always ends the same... I can't help but think, what if that gun did go off and he shot me..." her eyes began to glisten under the fluorescent light. "Haruka, I can't waste anymore time, I'm in love with you and I want to be with you. Despite everything that's happened... I think you know this-No, you do know this because that night, before all of this, we had the most amazing time together. I'm sorry for those nasty words I written about you, I was mad, but that night..." she reached down for her hand and took a firm hold of it, looking at it before looking back up into Haruka's eyes, "I fell right back in love with you."
Haruka stared at her with a soft gaze, wishing she could say the words back to her. Yes, she loved Yui, she always has, but she was still scared of hurting her and getting close to her. It just seemed to her that whenever she's around others like Haruna, Miyuki, Sayaka, Yui, Haruu, and anyone else, she tends to bring them pain. "I," Haruka whispered, taking her hand back and looking down at her fingers fiddling with the hospital bed sheet. She was ready to tell her she loves her too, but she lied instead, telling herself she has to push her away. Keep them all away. "Don't want to be with you." Haruka didn't dare look up and find a frown on Yui's face, she couldn't bear to see it.
"Why?" Yui asked, "because of what I wrote?" She waited for an answer but nothing. "Because you want someone else? You love Sayaka? Or simply because you don't love me?" This got a reaction out of Haruka. She saw how quick she turned up to look at her, her mouth agape ready to speak but she didn't, Haruka held back. "You can't even say you don't love me."
Haruka looked away, she honestly couldn't, but if she wanted the pain to stop she needed to do this, stay away and take back her fathers company and move on with her life like she always plans. Turning back, trying to keep a straight face, and without letting a quiver give out from her lower lip she said, "I don't love you. I don't want you."
The words came out perfectly , raw to Yui's ears, but she didn't believe her words. Taking a deep breath, Yui balled her fist and exhaled opening them back up. "Fine."
Haruka thought that was the end, she was going to leave and never see her again, except.
"I'm still not leaving you."
Haruka, again, looked up at her, "what?"
"I'm not leaving your side." Yui repeated.
Haruka shook her head. "Yui, just go! I don't want you here!"
"Why?" Yui asked. "You don't have to love me, but I love you and I know you're not well. I can't just leave you." She said.
"Yui, leave!" She exclaimed. Yui didn't move, she stood in the exact spot. Haruka couldn't take it, she wanted her gone. "Leave!" She shouted.
With her shouting, Sayaka and Miyuki rushed into the room asking what was going on. The two young women arguing didn't bother to stop staring each other down. Yui wasn't leaving and Haruka was growing tired of her standing there.
"I'm not going." She said.
Haruka suddenly gave her a push, it was weak but it did make Yui take a step back, only returning to her spot afterwards.
"Leave!" Haruka shouted and shoved Yui again. "Leave, leave, leave!" There was another shove but Yui shook her head standing back in her spot not saying a word as she watched Haruka shifting in her hospital bed and getting out of it only to stand inches from her. "Leave me, Yui!" She huffed, again she shoved, pushed, balled her fist, begging Yui to go, even shouting for her to take Sayaka and Miyuki, and everyone else. Haruka began to breakdown, she was crying, continuing to hit Yui's chest weakly, begging for her to never be near her again. When Yui still didn't budge, she felt Haruka's hits become strong and that's when she finally took a hold of her by the arms, trying to calm her down.
"Leave me, please. I can't take it!" She cried. "I don't want to lose you, Yui. Please, go!" Suddenly, before Yui could take a good hold of her, Haruka's knees became weak and she slid down as Yui followed her down onto her knees, pulling her close to her. They were on the floor sitting up, Yui hugging Haruka while she continued to repeat her words as she cried into Yui's arms. This wasn't like that night she had a panic attack, this was different.
"I lost them!" She cried, "My baby, my dad. I can't lose you, please. Yui!" She sobbed into Yui's chest, her fists still trying to push her away.
"You won't. I'm right here, Haruka." Yui whispered into her ear, "I am right here." She held her, rocking back and forth wanting to calm her, all while Miyuki and Sayaka stood watching until Miyuki couldn't handle it and turned to Sayaka, wrapping her arms around her and hiding her face onto Sayaka's shoulder, digging it onto the crook of her neck. She cried as well. Sayaka hugged her back watching the scene in front of her as she gave a squeeze to Miyuki. "It's okay." She told Miyuki.
She watched Haruka sobbing into Yui's chest. She had stopped fighting Yui and instead let her hold her, softly repeating to her that she was here, she won't leave, and that it will be okay.
Since that day, Haruka left Paris to go back to Japan, promising Miyuki, she was going to meet with a doctor after they had discussed about their mother. Haruka was glad to finally find out about her mother, who she was and what she had gone through. She felt bad for Miyuki having to witness their mother going through depression. It was one of the reasons why she had sworn to her half-sister she would get help. She also promised Yui she would return to work until the all clear from her therapist. However, she still needed to handle a couple of things at the company. Yui did protest but Haruka promised it was just a quick thing and then she would return to her fathers home to rest.
Before leaving Paris, she did visit Haruna and Yuko. She remembers walking through that door to find Haruna sitting at Yuko's side holding onto her hand. Haruka could feel her heart racing, nervous to actually get a full view of Yuko laying still in the bed, comatose with machines beeping and tubes attached to her.
"Hey," Haruka croaked, standing at the door. She watched Haruna sit up and turn around to find her. She didn't know what to do, it was weird. Haruna was her half sister and Haruka had no idea what to do or say next. Luckily for her, Haruna did.
The older woman stood from her chair, letting go of Yuko's hand and rushing towards the younger girl, wrapping her arms around her and giving her a hug. Surprised, Haruka took a minute to finally rise her arms and return the hug. She felt something, like there was a connection and she could only tighten her hug as she began to cry. Haruna cried as well as the two took in the moment.
"I'm glad you're okay." Haruna muffled, "I'm sorry for... your father." She finally pulled away from the hug to take a look at Haruka. This was her younger sister and it made her happy even after how the way it was revealed.
"He is your father too." Haruka reminded her.
"Yeah, I know, but... I didn't know until a couple days ago."
The two went silent now, staring at one another. It was weird how they were similar in some ways and the two never figured it out. Like Miyuki, Haruka felt something towards Haruna, but she was never sure.
"I'm sorry." Haruka spoke up, peeking over Haruka's shoulder. Her older sister turned back. "I'm sure she will wake up soon." Haruka added.
Haruna turned back and gave her a small smile. "She's a fighter... I know she will wake up."
Haruka returned the same small smile.
"How are you feeling?" Haruna asked.
"I'm doing fine, don't worry about me. I want to know if you're okay. I know I haven't been here and helped and all but-"
"Stop. I'm doing fine too and of course you couldn't be here." Haruna told her. "And you've helped. Our father has too. Yuko is given another chance to live, I know it. So, you've done much help."
Haruka was already clearing up her tears with the mentioning of her father but they began again. "I just want you to know if you need anything, give me a call."
"You're heading to Japan?" Haruna asked, reaching up and wiping her tears away. Just doing this simple thing makes her feel like she's actually taking care of a little sister. Her little sister.
Haruka nodded. "Yeah, I'm going to hold my fathers funeral and see about the company."
"I don't want you working." Haruna said. "Miyuki and I talked." Miyuki explained what had happened with Haruka to her.
"Don't worry, I'm not going to start working. First, I'm going to get help and see how it goes from there. With the support from my friends and new family." Haruka smiled. It had always been her and her dad, and now she had two sisters.
"You will. And if you need me, call." Haruna continued to rub her cheek gently with her thumb.
Haruka nodded, giving her sister another hug before leaving. "Whenever Yuko wakes up, call me. Please." She added before leaving.
Just as she made her way down the hall, Haruna came running out calling out to her and halting before her. "Can you... put this in Shima- I mean our fathers coffin." She held out a golden necklace with a small charm of a dress hanging at the bottom of it. "He gave it to me when I started modeling... so much makes sense to me now." She smiled. "But, I want him to have it. Please?"
Haruka took it into her hands. "Of course." She smiled, taking another look at the necklace. It was exactly the kind of gift he would give to someone he loves.
Now, in Japan, Haruka was standing before her future employees, giving a meeting about how the company may change. And she wanted to appoint someone to be in charge for the meantime. Haruu's mother would be in Paris taking care of the issues there and for the company in Japan, she placed an old colleague of her fathers who gladly accepted, only Haruka knew it was out of pity she was running the company, but she was trustworthy.
After the meeting, everyone gave their condolences to Haruka and she went along with it. She really didn't want to hear the 'I'm sorry for your loss' lines, she wanted things to go back to normal. But they weren't. By the time she saw everyone leave the meeting room and head back to work, one person stayed behind.
"I still don't understand why you didn't accept the job." Haruka told her.
"I'm not a business woman." The young girl chuckled. "Besides, I'm going to take a trip."
"Where to?" Haruka asked.
"Don't know yet. But, for me, going to help people is my medicine." She smiled at Haruka.
"Alright... just make sure to call me for some adventure stories." Haruka smiled.
"I like that smile." She reached and pinched her cheek. "I'm going to miss it."
Haruka smiled, trying to hide shade of pink coming up to her cheekbones. She pulled away from the pinch and her smile slowly faded away. "I'm sorry," she said, "for everything I put you through."
"No, Haruu, I am sorry. I kissed you, played with your emotions, had you running around for me, and my father put you to take care of me, I got you into schemes-"
Haruu laughed, "Stop!" She raised her hands, "it's all okay! Really. And yes, I do like you but I know it's not the same for you but I'm willing to be your friend. I'll always be your friend." She smiled, almost proudly. "I only want you to be happy, that's all I ever want for you."
Haruka didn't waste a second and pounced to hug her. "Thank you."
Haruu returned the hug. "No problem. I just want you to work on getting better and being-"
"Happy! I got it." Haruka pulled away from the hug and smiled up at her. "You never fail to give me a smile... I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too." Haruu coolly smiled and said her goodbye as she left the meeting room, leaving Haruka by herself, looking around the room as she reminisced her time there with her father. There were so many memories in the building alone, she practically grew up there. It only broke her heart at the thought of it, feeling her tears building up.
She turned towards the door to find Yui standing there.
"You ready?" She asked.
Haruka gave a nod. Taking a last look around the room before following Yui out. When she did, she found Miyuki and Sayaka waiting for them. The two had been looking around the building feeling as if they had not been there for ages.
"Are you ready?" Miyuki approached her first.
Sayaka appeared behind her, "how are you feeling?"
Haruka sighed. "The three of you make me feel more pressured."
They both apologized but Haruka gave them the okay along with a giggle.
"Where did Haruu go?" Yui asked. "I saw her leave."
Haruka began to walk, the girls following as they made their way to the elevator. "She's taking time away. Her way of dealing with everything." She replied. "And the three of you?"
"What about us?" Sayaka asked.
"You all told me you weren't well, especially when I asked if you two could take over the company." She looked at the couple, Sayaka and Miyuki.
"Some counseling." Miyuki answered. They hurried into an elevator before it closed on them.
Yui pushed the lobby button and the doors closed when Haruka asked what she was going to do to get over her nightmares. Yui told her the same thing, counseling. After everything there were so many issues to deal with and the girls still had nightmares of that night, just not as much as when they were in Paris. Haruka was glad though they were all getting help.
Once they reached to the lobby, they stepped out of the elevator and a sudden flash caught their attention. Turning they found the media outside waiting for Haruka. Since she arrived to Japan, they had been hounding her but she was escorted by her fathers one and only "secret service" men. They were ready for anything, trained for things like media frenzy, and they were loyal to her. Her fathers passing affected them as well seeing her father had treated them kindly, with much respect, and they did too.
"I think we should head the back way." Haruka said, watching through the glass pane as cameras flashed and people pushed and shoved. The girls nodded, following behind her as her security team appeared out of nowhere.
The week that passed, Haruka spent her time at home. Her only time outside would be to go to therapy and have check ups with her doctor. Her long sleeping days worried her and her friends, but she assured them nothing was wrong from what the doctor said.
At home she would rest, sit on the couch, watch some tv, even though most of the time they showed her fathers passing and the funeral coming up this week. Anytime she saw her fathers picture up on the screen, she shut her tv off and sit in the silence of the room. She liked being alone, but it was too lonely. Yui and Miyuki both offered to stay with her, however Haruka told them she would be fine alone not wanting to bother them any more than she has. If Yui wans't staying then she was going to pick her up and take her to her appointments at least and come by when she was allowed to.
She thought this was what she needed, to be alone in the apartment, only it made her wait for her father to come out of his bedroom or walk into his home and greet her. Sometimes just even an argument was what she missed; Butting heads with her father became a thing for them and though she hated it at times, she couldn't help but think one more argument would be good. Even if her father wasn't ever going to step into his home, Haruka would look at a picture of him and smile, her thoughts drifting to times like the day her father told her about rushing her to the hospital after falling off the end of the runway. She laughed at the memory playing in her head, but quickly she felt sadness over-take her, she still wished she could have told him how much she loved him and knew and understood the things he did to raise and protect her. She just wanted another moment with him.
Picking up her phone she decided to call Yui, these thoughts were actually making her depressed and it was the last thing she wanted, especially with her fathers funeral tomorrow. Yui told her she would be there soon as possible and that made Haruka excited. The two haven't really spoken about being in any relationship yet. It was hard for Haruka to bring it up and she was still uncertain of what could happen if they did decide to get back together. Haruka only wanted it to be right, to start off better than before, to not be ill... although by her second session she was told to take things slow, step by step, and Yui was a big leap for her.
While she thought of her sessions in therapy and about Yui, her doorbell rang. She jumped a little with the sound bringing her back to reality. Getting off the couch, in her sweatpants and black tee, she made her way to the door barefoot, not really caring if she looked lazy. After all it was Yui.
"Sayaka!" She was surprised to find her at the other side of the door. She was the last person she'd thought she would see, mostly because she had not been around, only Miyuki and Yui.
"Hey," Sayaka weakly smiled. She was nervous to come meet her since she had not come to visit this week. "How... are you?"
"I'm good." Haruka furrowed. "How have you been?" She raised her brows.
"Good." She replied. "I actually came by to see how you were and I was wondering if we could talk... I know I haven't come by but-"
"Sayaka," Haruka stopped her from rambling. "It's okay. Come in."
Haruka stepped aside holding her door open as her ex came in. "What did you want to talk about?" Haruka asked as she closed her door.
Sayaka walked in, the last time she was here was about a month ago and the only thing she realized was her hair had gotten longer. "Well," she took a deep breath. "About me and... Miyuki." She turned to find Haruka walking back to the couch. She followed.
"Oh?" Haruka didn't look at her, she knew what she was going to tell her and she admits that she felt a twinge of jealousy.
"Not only that but us as well." Sayaka added. She stood, not sure if she should sit or stay standing, until Haruka asked her to sit. "That night," she began just like that. "When... we... you know... kissed."
Haruka recalled back on that moment and how she pressed her lips against hers, she remembered the feeling.
Sayaka thought Haruka would respond but when she saw she wasn't, she continued. "I wanted to ask you if...-"
"It wasn't the same feeling as before." Haruka cut her off, taking a hold of a pillow on the couch and hugging it. Her therapist had told her she would need to go back and deal with mistakes she has done. She looked up at Sayaka, expecting like always, the hurt look. The one she had when she hurt her each time. Luckily however catching her look it wasn't it.
"It wasn't the same feeling as before." She repeated the words. "I love you, Haruka, but my feelings for you have changed. I wanted to tell you, but I was scared, worried I'd hurt you."
"You didn't." Haruka clearly stated. "I love you too, only, it's like a friend... my feelings have changed as well..."
Sayaka smiled. "I know, you love Yui."
"And you love Miyuki." Haruka returned a small smile. They shared a quick look before turning away with a faint chuckle from the two. "I'm happy for you." Haruka glanced back up and Sayaka met her eyes.
"Thank you." Again, they only looked at each other, not saying a word and understanding each other. They only wanted happiness for each other. "So, how is therapy? And are you ready for tomorrow?" Sayaka asked. She hated to ruin the mood but she wanted to see how Haruka was dealing.
"It took awhile but I'm ready." Haruka answered. "I think."
"We will all be there." Sayaka reached for her hand and took it into hers, their fingers intertwined. "It'll be okay."
"Thanks." Haruka rubbed her hand. Sayaka always made her feel better, she was the one who always understood her, how she felt, what she needed to hear. However, Yui did as well and in a different way she could not explain.
After some seconds passed, Haruka retracted her hand and asked about Miyuki. "How are the two of you?"
"We are working on the relationship." Sayaka looked away, hiding her smile. Each time she thought of Miyuki there was an automatic pull upwards on the corner of her lips. "We started off bumpy, but I know we can work through it."
Haruka tried to peek, catch that smile she actually missed seeing. "I'm sure things will get easier. After this things should only get easier."
Sayaka glanced back up and found Haruka losing her smile. "It will, just you wait and see."
Just then the doorbell rang. Haruka knew exactly who it would be and she stood up to open the door, leaving Sayaka in the living room. Opening the door she found exactly who it would be. Yui. The two greeted each other with a smile and Yui was invited in. Shutting the door they made their way to the living room as Yui asked her if she was hungry, she ended up learning not to ask her how she was too much.
"Hey," Sayaka greeted as soon as she saw her enter the room.
Yui turned and greeted in return. The two were almost back to being the friends they use to be. That week they had met up a couple times to have a drink or lunch. They even accompanied Atsuko and Minami to the airport before leaving France. The couple was glad to see the two getting along, even Minami jokes about how they needed to be on the verge of death to see they couldn't be apart, which earned her a strong smack from he wife. Too soon for jokes. Yui also had the chance to apologize to couple for the day she yelled about them, but they understood.
"What brings you here?" Yui asked walking over to sit beside her.
"Do you two want something to drink?" Haruka asked. The two quickly protested, telling her to sit and the two would get their own drink. Yui dragged Haruka to sit then followed Sayaka to the kitchen. Haruka sighed, sitting back and letting them do whatever.
"So," Yui said as she took out some cups for juice, "you didn't answer me."
Sayaka looked at her taking out a bottle from the fridge, commenting how they need to go grocery shopping with Haruka soon before answering her. "I came to see how Haruka was doing and to talk. Why, are you getting jealous again?" She smirked playfully as she closed the fridge and handed her the juice.
Yui suppressed a small laugh. "No," she shook her head, "I was curious."
Sayaka gave her a suspicious look. "Don't worry," she whispered, quickly glancing back at Haruka on the couch grabbing a pen from the coffee table and her notepad, she had been drawing a lot more lately. "She can only think of you." She said turning back.
Yui was finishing up filling the glasses. "I know, but..." she sighed, "it feels like she doesn't want me."
"It takes time, Yui."
"Yeah, I know." She handed her the juice to put back in the fridge. "But it feels like she has no plan for us in the future."
Sayaka placed the juice back, grabbed her cup and said, before returning to the living room, "don't worry. The two of you are crazy for each other, you two just need to take time."
She watched her walk on over and sit next to Haruka watching her drawing and commenting on it. Yui sighed, thinking she probably does need this to take time, but she sometimes couldn't help but feel like she wanted her already. However, she was willing to wait as long as she gets to see her almost everyday and smiling like she is now as she looked up at her.
The funeral service was big; media, celebrities, "distant relatives". It was all a show and Haruka hated it, swallowing back the lump in her throat just to make it through. There were speeches from close friends, from an "uncle", even Sayaka who only gave kind words and it made Haruka smile for a moment after listening her story on the time he and Sayaka had some drinks together. She remembered that night, the two stumbled home singing loudly and Haruka was upset at the two. She remembered tucking her father to sleep and having to share a bed with Sayaka. It was funny as Sayaka told her the parts she did not know.
Haruka was up last, standing in front of all those people and cameras flashing. Her hands were shaking while she held her speech in her hands, looking around the room. No words came out, not until her eyes met with her friends on the front row. She caught Yui giving her a smile and mouthing, "you'll be okay. Breath." And with that Haruka took a deep breath in and out giving a speech that left the room in silence as she stepped down and back to her seat. She talked about her fathers life, about how he worked to get where he was at, how he was a liar, but a good father indeed. Everything he did was for her and until now she understood it was for her. She never believed him when he said it but by the end it was true. She was in tears as soon as she sat down and Yui took her hand while Miyuki hugged her. She honestly couldn't have made it this far into the week without them, especially now.
By the end, they buried her father, placing the last bouquet of flowers over the dirt where her father laid to rest and Haruka watched people leaving. One by one the people dissipated and the only ones left were the four girls. Miyuki held onto Sayaka, she had not stopped crying all morning and Miyuki only wanted her pain to stop and she hugged her for as long and as much as she could. Yui only kept holding Haruka's hand.
"Are you ready, Haruka?" Yui asked. Haruka didn't respond but suddenly she turned and cried onto Yui's chest as Yui wrapped her arms around her and Haruka placed a hand over her chest softly asking why her father had to go, why did he give up. She was still hurting and this wasn't going to change. Not for a long time.
"Excuse me." They heard from behind. Yui turned as well as Miyuki and Sayaka but Haruka only leaned onto Yui. "I need to speak to you Ms. Shimazaki." The man wore a black and white suit that fitted him perfectly, tailored to fit him and clearly designed by her father.
Haruka looked up at him while Yui stood somewhat protective over her. "Whose asking?" Yui asked the man.
"I am your fathers lawyer," he spoke to Haruka, ignoring Yui. "I'm sorry Ms. Shimazaki, I know it's a bad time but we need to talk about your fathers will."
Haruka sniffles, her crying had died down and she picked her head off Yui's chest. "His will?"
"Yes," the man responded, "he left a will and you must read it right away. It's been almost a month since we've been trying to contact you about it."
"I never heard anything about this."
"Please come with me." The man said.
Haruka looked at Yui and the other two girls seeing if she should go with him.
"Don't worry," the man reached into his pocket and pulled out a card, his information all on it. He was a lawyer. "Your friends can come too."
They were at the law firm, Haruka actually remembers the place. She remembers once when she was in high school, her father asked her to meet up with him there, it was probably when he wrote the will. They sat in the man's office while he took out a white envelope with some golden symbol printed on the front of it and placed it on his desk as he unbuttoned his suit and sat down.
"You're father changed his will so many times," he chuckled to lighten the mood but that wasn't happening. Sayaka and Miyuki sat on extra chairs behind Yui and Haruka who sat right in front of the desk, plainly staring at the man who cleared his throat to stop his light laughter. "Anyways, this is his will," he he held it up. Haruka wanted to reach for it only she knew she wasn't allowed to. "And this is the paperwork." He handed a thicker envelope to her And gave him a questioning look. "I'll begin." He said.
She watched how the man opened and took out her fathers will carefully and began to read it. "This is to you, my daughter Haruka. I'm sorry, I've left such a burden to you, a company that has to live up to its expectation. I know you weren't meant to run a company but Now that I'm gone you have to, or my name won't live on."
Haruka mentally rolled her eyes, it sounded like him.
"However, you won't be alone." The man continued, "I'm leaving the company to you and your sisters."
When Miyuki heard this she sat up and saw Haruka turn back to look at her.
"I want to apologize to you now, I took this to my grave instead of telling you. I am sorry my daughter. I should have told you, should have let you grow up with them, you were always so lonely but I never wanted anyone else to be a part of your life. You have two sisters and I want you and them to run the company, I don't want you to be alone in this. You, Miyuki Watanabe, and Haruna Kojima, are going to inherit the company, split it into three and take over. This is what I want for you."
The man stopped and Haruka looked up at him waiting for more only there wasn't anymore he said. Her father was never good with words.
"The paperwork is there, all we need is three signatures and the company is yours. You could do what you want with it." The man said to her and Miyuki.
Haruka looked down at the envelope in her hands before turning back to Miyuki, mentally asking her what they should do. She never thought he would give his company to the three of them.
"How long do we have to sign this?" Miyuki asked the man.
"I'll give you three days, and if not the co-owner can take over." He simply explained.
They all looked at each other wondering what they should do.
"When was the last time you spoke to Haruna?"
"Yesterday. A quick hello."
"What if she doesn't sign?"
"Then..." Haruka sighed looking down at the envelope. They returned to Haruka's place and Miyuki and her were in the bedroom staring at the damn papers while Yui and Sayaka went for food. Miyuki had to beg Sayaka for some air, she had not been good all day. "It's just the two of us. Unless you don't want to."
"Do you?" Miyuki asked and Haruka raised her head, looking at her as if the question was stupid.
"Of course I'm going to sign, it's my fathers company." She argued.
"Yes, it is but Haruka you have an option here. You can let someone else take over and you can go back to drawing, designing, or doing something else."
"I can't leave the company." Haruka stated.
Miyuki sighed, watching her get off the bed and walk over to her window with the paper in her hand. "Haruka, I know you want what's best for the company, I know you want to keep the Shimazaki name for it but you aren't fit to take care of it."
"I've made it this far," she turned, a furrow on her face. She was clearly upset. "I have gone through so much just working as a designer and look I'm still here."
"No, I'm signing. If I have to run the place myself I will." She took a pen from her bedside and without hesitating she signed. After, she threw the paperwork to Miyuki, "now you decide."
Miyuki threw it aside and stood up from the bed, "Haruka, please, at least wait until you're doing better to run the place."
"I have three days!" She almost shouted. She began to feel pressure on her chest and again her breathing shorten.
"Breath." Miyuki said, "It's an anxiety attack, remember what the doctors said. Breath." Miyuki begins to breath slowly telling Haruka to look at her. When that didn't work, she placed her hand over her chest and asked her to feel her chest go up and down. And soon she relaxed.
"I'm sorry," Haruka said between breaths. "So much is running through my mind."
"I know," Miyuki rubbed her arms to comfort her, "let's sleep on it tonight and I'll call Haruna tomorrow. We can make a plan."
Haruka gave a nod. After, Miyuki helped her changed and put her to bed. Haruka took her pills and hoped she could sleep all through the night.
Miyuki and Sayaka headed back to Miyuki's apartment after being at Haruka's for the night. Yui stayed, sleeping on the couch just in case Haruka needed anything after Miyuki told them what had happened. And Sayaka decided to stay with Miyuki. They didn't really have much time to spend with each other. The two had been staying in their own homes, after coming back from Paris that's what they wanted, to be in the comfort of their own homes. The two did call and message each other, checking up on one another, working on their relationship. One night the two were on the phone, acting like dork couples and enjoying themselves. They talked about movies, what they had for dinner, what they want to do on a sunny day, they went on about anything. It was the first time the two had some fun and talked about something else other than the hostage situation, hospitals, nightmares. Also, it was the first night Sayaka didn't have nightmares, and what made it better is when she awoke with her phone on the pillow on speaker she heard Miyuki's cute mumbling; something about ice cream.
"What do you think?" Sayaka smiled, fixing Miyuki's hair while she laid next to her in the bed.
"Our first date at a theme park?" Miyuki hummed, "I don't know... how about breakfast in our pj's and a day at the park just looking up at the sky." Her arm reached up as if she wanted to feel the sky.
Sayaka only grinned, she was too adorable for her. "Breakfast in our pj's and a day at the park looking at the sky... sounds perfect to me."
Miyuki's arm came back down, laying over Sayaka's hip. "Good." She smiled, wiggling closer to Sayaka. Sayaka chuckled then did the same until the tips of their noses booped.
Miyuki shut her eyes while Sayaka watched her, smiling at the beautiful face, enjoying this moment. To think she could finally lay in bed and hold someone she loved close without worrying about an ex or current side chick calling. As much as she loved her moments with Haruka, this felt more comfortable; stress free. She thought of days she could go outside and hold Miyuki's hand, tell people this was her girlfriend, and she could kiss her out in public without sneaking around. The future seemed bright for her and Miyuki and she was happy. Except, happy bubbles burst sometimes, she knew that.
"So," Sayaka croaked. She thought about the future and with the future comes work. She doesn't know how her brain could have popped this in her head but it did and though she didn't want to mention it, she did. "Are you going to sign the papers?" She asked, watching Miyuki open her eyes back up and catch Sayaka staring at her. "I know you may not want to talk about it but I do. I want to know what you want to do."
Miyuki's eyes wandered down to Sayaka's split ends, she had not realized how long her hair had grown out this last year. She reached up and began to feel them with the tips of her fingers, watching it slide between them. "I'm not sure." She answered glancing back up. "I don't know if I should sign or not. While I worked in Paris, I realized the challenge of managing everything. I don't think I want to do it again, but, I don't want to leave Haruka with this huge burden."
Sayaka didn't respond right away, she thought about it. "Maybe if... you and Haruna sign with Haruka it would make it easier to run the place. Each of you can take on certain departments in the building; the magazine, models, designers, Etc. the three of you wouldn't be alone doing this."
She had a point, Miyuki thought. If they signed they can easily help Haruka. "If we sign, we- or I, can watch the place while Haruka gets better and Haruna can join in after Yuko wakes up!"
"That's if it happens." Sayaka sort of bursted her bubble. As much as they wanted Yuko to wake up, it had not happened and they were losing hope of it. "Talk to Haruka and Haruna, but also," Sayaka ran her hand over Miyuki's cheek, "I don't want you taking on so much either."
Miyuki reached up, capturing her hand and bringing it up to her lips. "I promise, I'll take it easy but I need to be there for Haruka."
"And I'm here for you." Sayaka said. The two stared at each other, slowly realizing their lips were coming into contact. They closed their eyes and let the kiss happen, a kiss long overdue. They both had been wanting to do that for a long time, but now, it was just perfect. They broke the kiss and looked into each other's eyes again, a smile building up and they both went in for another, deeper than the previous one. It was as if every kiss made them fall over and over again.
In the middle of the night, Haruka woke up feeling thirsty. She reached for the cup of water she left sitting on the bedside table only to find it empty. Groaning in frustration, she let go of her cup and turned over on her bed, finding her comfortable spot to go back to sleep, but she really wanted some cool water. Turning back over to the edge of the bed, she rolled off and stood up, still dazed as she tried to catch herself from losing her balance. She took her cup and made her way through the dark, trying to reach for the doorknob. She swung her hand around catching it and turning the knob.
She made it down the hall finding the light to the living room on. Curious, she squinted her eyes trying to make out who was laying on her couch. At first she thought it would be Miyuki, but she would have shared the bed with her. Haruka got closer and closer and finally, feet from the couch, she recognized her. Yui was the one sleeping on her couch. Haruka, relieved, made her way to the her and pulled the sheets she had up over her chest, taking her arm which laid over her head, tucking it under the sheet and smiled one last time before turning and getting what she wanted; her cool water.
"Mmm," she heard the quiet moan from behind her and she turned, finding Yui waking up. Haruka stayed frozen in her spot hoping she'd fall back asleep, she didn't want to wake her up. "Haruka..." Yui called out softly, almost breathlessly. Her eyes were barely open but she could see her. She sat up, "Hey."
"I was getting some water," Haruka whispered, "I didn't mean to wake you up. Go back to sleep."
Yui was rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. "It's fine, the nightmare woke me up." She got off the couch and walked over to Haruka taking her cup. "I think I need some water too." She brushed pass Haruka towards the kitchen as the other girl followed. Watching Yui take out the glass bottle filled out water from the fridge and grabbing another cup, serving both.
"How long have you been having the nightmares for?" Haruka asked. Her voice was small in asking, not because the whole apartment was really quiet but because she wasn't sure if she should ask.
"Ever since..." Yui thought for a second. "The night of the Fashion show."
"I'm sorry," Haruka lowered her head and Yui caught her, placing the glass of water down. Haruka had been feeling bad for the things her friends and family were going through. Although she didn't show it or mention it, she still believed it was all her fault they are suffering now.
"Hey," Yui took a step towards her, having her almost inches from her, and she placed both her hands over Haruka's arms telling her it was okay. She knew what she was thinking, she knew she still blamed herself. "The nightmares will go away. Maybe. Honestly, I'm just glad I was there, I mean it did suck, but it would have been worst for me if I wasn't there. It will get better, I promise."
"Stop! It's happened and each of us are working hard to get through it. The nightmare I had was nothing like the previous one I had. They are slowly... becoming less intense. Haruka, it's all okay, I swear." Haruka looked at her with puppy eyes and Yui couldn't help but smile at the adorable look she gave her. She had that urge to just kiss her but she withheld. "Come on, take your water and go back to sleep."
Haruka felt her give her a small push once she was handed her water, but she wanted to know how she could get through nightmares while she was still suffering from her own night terrors. Her sessions helped but it had only been a week. Unless, Yui was like her, she kept it all in. She turned around with her cup of water and looked up at Yui, surprised to find her standing so close to her, making her feel flushed. "Do y-you," she stuttered while Yui cocked her head slightly, "want to sleep with me- I mean I'll share my bed!" She corrected. Embarrassed. "We can talk... Or sleep... whatever..." she muttered the last word, looking away from her. She wasn't even trying to hide her blush only trying to keep from looking at her.
Yui felt a flutter, the sight of Haruka inches from her, and knowing she was keeping from looking directly at her made it impossible to smile. Also the blush she caught. "I-I," Yui stuttered as well. "If you, uh, want me to. Do you- do you want to talk?"
"Yeah!" Haruka quickly answered. "I..." she took a deep breath and relaxed. "I was thinking the couch is uncomfortable and I want to lay down and talk... with you. If that's alright?"
Yui watched her looking up at her. Those butterflies in her stomach weren't calming down. "That's fine with me."
The two laid in bed, at each side not daring to move closer towards the middle. They laid on their side staring across at one another. It became awkward after awhile. They looked around the room trying very hard not to let their eyes meet.
"Your room needs more furniture." Yui commented, breaking the silence.
Haruka stuck her head up and looked around. "I never owned much." She rested her head back on the pillow. "My dad always moved from place to place and I eventually grew sick of unpacking so many boxes."
"Couldn't your dad hire someone to unpack it for you?" Yui asked, letting out a small laugh.
"I didn't want anyone touching my stuff." Haruka complained. "Besides, most of the things I had boxed up I kept them there because I knew by a month we'd move."
"How many places have you lived in?"
"More than I can count." Haruka rolled her eyes just thinking of the homes she remembered living in.
"And are you going to settle here?" Yui asked, tucking her hand under her pillow.
Haruka did the same, adjusting herself in her bed as she did, not realizing she moved about an inch closer towards the middle of the bed. "I haven't thought about it..." she looked around again, "I may just move."
Yui smiled, getting comfortable in bed, not realizing, like Haruka, she moved an inch too.
"And you? Where are you going to work now?" Haruka asked.
Yui shrugged. "I'm not sure yet... I can always go back to my old job, but I don't want to write gossip columns..."
"Have you thought about... writing a new book?" She asked while she stared down at her white sheets, trying to smooth out the crease with her finger.
Yui didn't reply, instead she stared at Haruka feeling bad about her old book. She still remembers the moment she ran out the room crying. "I think I'll wait... I don't have any ideas, stories, and all."
"I don't think you should give up." Haruka said glancing back up at her. No one looked away now, they each caught each other's eyes. "I understand where you were coming from when you wrote those things. I would have done the same. Besides, you were angry and you needed to release it somehow... right?" She looked hopeful on that being the reason why she wrote those nasty things about her that she held her breath.
Yui gave a nod, relieving Haruka. "It was all my anger... but for now, I still think I should wait... it's hard to write at the time now."
Yui, again, wiggled to the middle of the bed. "Because, I need to take care of you." Her voice was almost a whisper.
Haruka watched her reach over with her hand and lightly push back some her her hair strands. "You don't have to, I want you to look out for yourself."
"I am, but I want to look after you." She cupped her cheek now.
Haruka felt her soft hand land on her warm cheek, it was perfect. But suddenly she pulled back. "How do you do it?" She asked. "How do you stay strong like this, how do you wake up in the morning after your nightmares and face the world the way you do? Think of taking care of me. After all that's happened..."
Yui furrowed, "what do you mean? I wake up with a struggle."
"Do you?" Haruka asked, "you never seem like it. It always seems like you get through everyday."
"Well, I do." Yui frowned.
"Tell me about it then." Haruka scooted towards her, "I want to know how you're doing, I want to know what's going on in your head."
"First you tell me." Yui stated. "I want to know too!"
"You already know."
"Do I? I feel like you still have so much locked away and you don't want to tell me."
"Fine! I love you but I'm scared." Haruka admitted. "I'm scared you'll get hurt! I replay the moment the gun was suppose to go off, I remember staring down the barrel of the gun and shutting my eyes. I remember opening them up to find you holding me! You know how terrified I was, I could have lost you! You're an idiot!" She pushed her. Haruka was mainly angry, more so than tearful.
"And you know how stupid you were to be in that position? I could have lost you!" Yui barked back. "We both faced death and we both get up everyday, I get up everyday just to be with you! We keep going over this, it's a fucking record player with you! I know we are both struggling but see," she wrapped her arm around her and pulled her closer, against her body, "we are both here resisting to do this!"
Haruka gulped back, muttering, "what?"
Yui answered her with a kiss, a kiss Haruka wanted as badly as her. She didn't pull away, she let her sink into it and both weren't pulling apart. Haruka deepened the kiss, her hand making her way up Yui's arm and placing it behind her neck to pull her and keep her close. When they finally pulled away from each other Yui spoke up, out of breath. "You're scared of us, but you could be scared forever. I want us to try, please." Their foreheads were leaning against each other and they opened their eyes to catch their distance, it surprised the two of them.
Haruka was a little hesitant but finally she gave in, she wanted her just as bad and the kiss was proof. She could give so many excuses as to why she couldn't be with her but they would all be lies. Yui was the one she wanted for so long, scared or not she was the one in this moment helping her get through each and everyday.
With no words, Haruka's hand traveled softly from the back of Yui's neck to her cheek, cupping it as her thumb ran just over her cheekbone and without hesitation, and an answer, she planted a soft kiss on Yui, letting her know she was willing to try.