JPHiP Radio (26/200 @ 128 kbs)     Now playing: Sonim - Anything But Ordinary

Author Topic: Trigger (Chapter 2: I Am Tanaka. Hear My Roar) [3/23]  (Read 3062 times)

Offline taylortot

  • Member
  • Posts: 17
Trigger (Chapter 2: I Am Tanaka. Hear My Roar) [3/23]
« on: March 23, 2011, 04:38:39 AM »
Sudden change in plans...
I'm so sorry.
 :badluck:
Gomennasai. Gomennasai.

Well you seeeee... What If wasn't going as well as I expected it to... I just had no idea what I was doing  :nervous

So in the time I was away from JPH!P, I took some time to think about a new storyline and plot to straighten things out a bit. So therefore... Trigger is now coming your way~ ...and I also found out that I'm better at writing stories in first-person rather than third.

Once again... I'm sorry.  :bow:

But the thing is, I think I know what I'm doing now.  :peace:

----------

Chapter 1:
I Am Kamei. Hear My Cry.


   Flipping through the pages of our old photo albums with pictures of my mother and myself as a baby, I seem to stress out about what I've grown to be -- what I've become. I took the time to think deeply about the past, and every passing minute just made my body feel empty. Heartless. I don't know if it's because I'm insecure about myself, or if I'm just depressed. I never knew the reason why. I thought I learned to grow out of these kind of situations, but apparently not. In this case, I'm getting stuck right in the middle again.

   My parents divorced before I was even born. When hearing that story for the first time couldn't break my heart enough, I was told my father was an alcoholic. A careless, selfish man who had others in mind when already bonded with my mother who we all thought was "the one" for him. Or so he said.

   If I knew what this man looked like, I would try to slap some sense into him, being the air-headed teenager I am. When anger took over my emotions, I used to yell at my mom, bringing him into the situation without thinking about what would happen.

  "You and Dad divorced -- so what? I never knew what he was like. How do I know you're not lying? He could be the greatest man on the planet!" I used to say. My speechless mother would just stand there with tears forming in her eyes, noticeably hurt, but allowing me to continue pouring out my inner feelings. "You know what? I'm gonna leave! I'm gonna go find Dad! You can't stop me!"

   Being here in my own home and in my own room is what obviously proves that wrong.

   Not only is that a problem in my life -- I have social anxiety. Emotional discomfort, fear, apprehension, or worry. That doesn't help me build strength at all. It just weakens my ability to speak my mind to those who don't understand. The only thing that I find positive about myself is that I wish for everyone to be treated equally. It's what everyone wishes for, but it's not gonna happen. I mean, come on. With almost seven billion people in the world, half of them are opposite of what we all dream of being.

   Kamei Yasuko. When I was younger, I always wondered why she secretly cried by herself in her room, why she refused to make eye contact with me for a week, why she didn't cook as much as she used to, why she didn't do this and that. She's my mother. How is a five year old supposed to take care of her own mother? It's almost like we switched roles. That was quite an experience for me. She was just scared to lose me like Dad. She wanted to be the mother that was loved. What she doesn't clearly get is that she IS. By me. The fact that she cares so much is enough to make me love her to death. She's been there for me all along.

   She once said that telling me about the divorce at such a young age was a mistake. I asked why.

   "You were young, Eri. You were at your growing stage -- when you were supposed to be be free and happy like all of the other kids," she said. She would pause and gently wipe her tears away with her fingertips. "I believe you were traumatized, dear. Emotionally disturbed by the fact that you have a father that chose his own life to take care of than yours." Hearing this made my insides feel heavy. I was sinking.

   I still remember that feeling to this very day. I'm still not even over it. I hate it.

   We apparently did have pictures of my father, but my family threw them all out before my eyes were open and I walked the grounds as earth's newest human being.

   I miss the way things used to be. The girl I used to be.

   The girl that seemed strong - crumbled.
   The girl that smiled all the time - cried.
   The girl that never stopped trying - finally gave up.

   I am Kamei. Hear my cry.

----------

 :cow:

P.S. this IS a TanaKame fic...
       and I don't know who Yasuko is. I just made her the mother of Eri.

   




   

« Last Edit: March 24, 2011, 12:04:59 AM by taylortot »

Offline oddball

  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 781
  • Off in the woods........
Re: Trigger (Chapter 1: I Am Kamei. Hear My Cry) [3/22] +note from author
« Reply #1 on: March 23, 2011, 11:36:05 AM »
Intresting star to this fic, Poor Eri, seems as though so many things have gone wrong in her life, the worst part is that she blames herself for all of it and as she sees no-one it's all she thinks about.....

looking forward to more!  :twothumbs

Offline rndmnwierd

  • Subleader of Tsunku's Army
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 4824
  • What has been seen cannot be unseen.
Re: Trigger (Chapter 1: I Am Kamei. Hear My Cry) [3/22] +note from author
« Reply #2 on: March 23, 2011, 03:57:41 PM »
Looks interesting.

Offline kano-chan

  • Member+
  • Posts: 349
  • ~Angel Miya~
Re: Trigger (Chapter 1: I Am Kamei. Hear My Cry) [3/22] +note from author
« Reply #3 on: March 23, 2011, 11:45:45 PM »
Yaay!! :cow: A new TanaKamei fic! :heart: Kame seem to have a sad childhood without her father... ;) I wonder if there's something to do with her father when Reina appears later. :roll:

Please keep it up! :twothumbs I'm hooked. :grin:

Offline taylortot

  • Member
  • Posts: 17
Re: Trigger (Chapter 1: I Am Kamei. Hear My Cry) [3/22] +note from author
« Reply #4 on: March 24, 2011, 12:03:38 AM »
Chapter 2:
I Am Tanaka. Hear My Roar.


   Sometimes, my father wonders what the hell happened in the past that caused me to be the way I am now. These days, I just ignore his questions and refuse to talk about it, cause I seem to be happier that way. If it wasn't for the people I met at school, I would be the same wonky-eyed, so-called "yankii" from when I was younger. I was given that nickname because of my attitude (and lack of makeup).

   I was told not to blame others for my own mistakes, but having an attitude definitely isn't a "mistake" (at least in my opinion). There's always a reason behind a pissed off girl. Someone did it, or she's just on her period and is constantly cranky. I always said to my Dad that I get my attitude from my mother. I still think that. As wrong as it seems to my other relatives, it's true to a lot of other people too. Youth these days do that -- I don't know why adults can't understand the difference between their generation and ours.

   I hate that I still worry about my mother. She's long-gone and not even in our household anymore. What am I to be worried about that nasty woman? She left us. Me and Dad. We're alone. That was the main reason for my sudden attitude change in third grade. The anger got to me and I couldn't stop myself. The best way to relieve that feeling was to shove other kids around, push them out of my way irritatedly and walk around the school like I owned the place.

   Thinking back to that period of time just makes me sigh and shake my head. People can change a lot... but that just gets me thinking. Why didn't Mom change?

   I'm sure she did, but that's something I never knew about. Dad would never tell me about it no matter how much I begged and begged, almost like a plead for a person to stop smoking.

   "Let's wait until you're ready, okay?" he'd say. I scoff and raise an eyebrow.

   "I AM ready, Dad. I've BEEN ready. It's my own MOTHER we're talking about, and you won't even tell me what happened? You won't tell me the reason why she left?"

   Now that I think about it though, I don't think I'm ready. If he's aware of my preparations, then it's probably a big deal. I can't let my guard down. How bad could it possibly be? My mother wouldn't make such a scene. Would she?

   Because of how much trouble I got in in elementary school, my father switched locations for me to start junior high in Fukuoka, and that's where things got better. I met some people, and surprisingly, they were willing to become my friends, even though I still had about fifty percent of my "yankii" attitude within me. Anything they do wrong could tick me off, but they were soon aware of the disadvantages.

   And THAT is the reason for my second attitude change in my life. Friends. Everyone else had their mothers to back them up -- they were the ones to hold them and care for them, keeping the closest eye on them since Day 1. That didn't last too long for ME, though. My friends were able to figure that out, so now, I have multiple "mothers". Thinking about how much life has changed for me is indeed kind of creepy, but it's for the better, and that's all my father wants. He wants me to be happy.

   God knows I'm strong. He made me the girl that understands life. There IS such thing as hope.

   The girl that used to hang her head low - looked up at the sky.
   The girl that used to think nothing was possible - believed.
   The girl that used to think nothing was real - dreamed.

   I am Tanaka. Hear my roar.

----------

 :peace: cheeeese
Character introductions are so boring -____- buuuut we're getting there~  :cow:







   

Offline kano-chan

  • Member+
  • Posts: 349
  • ~Angel Miya~
Re: Trigger (Chapter 2: I Am Tanaka. Hear My Roar) [3/23]
« Reply #5 on: March 24, 2011, 05:01:24 AM »
Hmm... They're two completely different girls! :roll: One gave in :( and one's got hope. :D

How interesting is that Kame lost her father and Reina lost her mother?  :D

Getting more interesting! I wonder how they would meet. :twothumbs

Offline rndmnwierd

  • Subleader of Tsunku's Army
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 4824
  • What has been seen cannot be unseen.
Re: Trigger (Chapter 2: I Am Tanaka. Hear My Roar) [3/23]
« Reply #6 on: March 24, 2011, 05:53:52 AM »
Are they actually related? Or just in similar situations? Makes me wonder, but we shall see.

Offline oddball

  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 781
  • Off in the woods........
Re: Trigger (Chapter 2: I Am Tanaka. Hear My Roar) [3/23]
« Reply #7 on: March 24, 2011, 12:35:40 PM »
^

I too think that perhaps they could be related

Seems as though they have very different outlooks on what is pretty much the same situation, Where as Eri gave up Reina kept on battling through the disadvantages in her life, it will be interesting when these two meet (I assume they will)

Offline Sora-chan

  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 118
  • Kawaii deshou?
Re: Trigger (Chapter 2: I Am Tanaka. Hear My Roar) [3/23]
« Reply #8 on: August 21, 2011, 07:13:10 AM »
YOU ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO FINISH THIS.. It has my favorite favoriteeeee coupling you have to come back! *puppy dog eyes* please? lol.
Tanakame!<3333 ReinAi<333 TanaGaki!<33 TakaGaki!<33 TanaShige!<33 AiSayu!<3 JunSayu!<33 SayuKoha!<3 AiEri<3

JPHiP Radio (26/200 @ 128 kbs)     Now playing: Sonim - Anything But Ordinary