JPHiP Forum
The Hello! Project Fanfics => H!P Fanfics => Topic started by: Kei on July 06, 2006, 11:32:47 PM
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I'll post more next week! I also want to make something clear. Just because in the story you aren't portrayed in the most flattering light, it doesn't mean I don't like ya. It's all in good fun. If I do offend someone, I'm sorry. But I also won't be changing it unless there is a good reason.
Also, if others want to help write this, drop me a PM yo. ON WITH THE STORY!
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Sitting around a campfire in Sapporo singing Koombayah were aedon, ebc, FoxyBrown, Popcorn Joe and Tettekete’s Amplifier, which was blearing out a heavy metal version of the aforementioned song. Tettekete himself was out in the trees, on his cell phone, talking to his sweetie, the pimp Ayabie, who at the time was in the middle of a wild orgy with Maliciel and harlock who were cosplaying as AKB48 members. As he hung up, Mal hit his limit and his robotic brain exploded, killing them all. However, not all was as it seemed to the police…
Meanwhile, on the U.S.S. John E. Badass, Masa was copping an earful from Captain daigong, who was in another one of his infamous moods.
“Fuck you, I say we follow that StreakInTheSky to Saburo!” he said.
“I think you mean Sapporo. Good choice, there is a brewery there, and we all know I’m an alcoholic as a result of the sexual and mental abuse I’ve suffered at the hands of…”
His words were cut short from a blast of water from Kuno_Thunder’s pokemon (gratuitously named after himself) THUNDERDUCK, which was in the midst of battle with .:meowchi:., who was being controlled by boykun, who had enough drugs in his system do bring down a tama-chan, which was a particularly large and vicious breed of mutant human-cat.
“JFC!” (a shortened, internet version of Jesus Fucking Christ) screamed ShaoranLi, who was trying to get freaky with Sakura on the pokemon match viewing platform. Tyler_Wood_2005 was in the ladies toilet with a pair of used panties on his face (he knew they were previously worn by gocchin, but what he didn’t know was that it was the JPH!P forum member, not Gotou Maki. HA! Incidentally, no you can’t have your money back) and a video camera, filming everything.
“This shit will sell like hotcakes on the internet” he mused, taking a deep sniff of the panty fragrance. Unfortunately, the Light_Hikari was too bright, and the sun was behind all the goings on, the film was badly washed out. This would play out to daigong’s favour in the future, during his court martial for sexual assault.
Back at the campfire, aedon and ebc were getting antsy. They went inside a tent to play bingo. After they left, FoxyBrown asked “can I have some Popcorn Joe?”
“Sure! By the way, you’re my favourite movie character. This is a little embarrassing, but I used to dream of you. …you know, doing sexy stuff.”
“Such as?” She was intrigued.
“Dancing the Funky Monkey, of course! That dance gets my loins a tinglin’!”
“Shall I Do it! Now?”
“Better not, I’d probably ruin my pants. These are real tivx brand. The latest fad in Kazakhstan! Cost me an arm and a leg. Oh, and a penis. Thankfully it wasn’t mine. I stole it from some dolphin lover called Flypper.”
At that very moment, on the ship, shirenu was dancing around, apparently with herself. However, in her mind, she was at a party attended by Ericks’ dog, makistar, dancing the Odango, a much harder and sexier fandango. thatguy that everyone hates was on the other side of the deck wondering the fuck she was doing, when all of a sudden, the beautiful Princess_Pudding and her saucy maid arian came running towards him. When they reached him, they both punched him in the face and knocked him clean out.
But why they did this, you’ll have to wait to find out…
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“Fuck you, I say we follow that StreakInTheSky to Saburo!” he said.
“I think you mean Sapporo.
that part is hillarious! i love this, can't wait for more! by the way i'm a freaking pokemon! haha!
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lmao great shit kei!
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:lmao: major props to you man
kei's a genius! :yep:
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rofl. hilarious
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The only fanfic I've ever checked out! Fun stuff, though!
Yay to being a badass princess!
EDIT: IT'S THE NANA POST!! 707 RULES!
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I GET TO BE A SWEAR! :damnfunny And Tyler's got pantsu on his head!!! :lmao:
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Whoa, that was really entertaining~
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Back at the campfire, aedon and ebc were getting antsy. They went inside a tent to play bingo.
WHAT THE HELL? :O Otherwise it's funneh.
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Mutant human-cat???
OMG...Like Thunder Cat? :w00t:
HOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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lol, this is good shit, man
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Woo, I'm a pimp!
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oi kei you bitch! we're still waiting to find out! :D
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At that very moment, on the ship, shirenu was dancing around, apparently with herself. However, in her mind, she was at a party attended by Ericks’ dog, makistar, dancing the Odango, a much harder and sexier fandango.
I'm a dog? :doh: XD
woff...woff...
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Lmao !Great stuff kei ! We want more of this stuff D:
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I'm just building the suspense. :)
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I'm a dog? :doh: XD
woff...woff...
not any ordinary dog. you're my dog! :D
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I'm just building the suspense. :)
i can't handle it!!
you know if you hold out too long everyone won't care anymore :wink:
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I want to see why arian and I beat up thatguy :lol:
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not any ordinary dog. you're my dog! :D
woff woff (translation: Yes master)
woff woff F*#^@$ (F*#^@$)#!~* woff (translation: over my dead body you #*&$% )
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:lol:
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Okay fine.
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Deep under the sands of Kazakhstan, tivx sat alone in his underground lair. Why had his perfect plan failed? Surely it was so inventive that it just had to work. But still, the members of Hello! Project were not wearing tivx brand jeans, therefore he was not touching any Hello! Project butt! The entire world was wearing them, but not Hello! Project. Something was stopping them. But what?
“Sir,” his sexy assistant suki* came over the intercom “we have a guest.”
They had arrived! The person that would solve all their problems! The doors opened and in strutted…
thatguy was coming around. Princess_Pudding and arian were standing over him, ready to interrogate.
“Wha… What happened?”
arian, despite the fact that she is Filipino, spoke with a Latino accent. “We found pictures of us in your room! Badly photoshopped pictures of us. You photoshopped your own face into them! We want an explanation!”
“Oh those! Haha, relax ladies! There is nothing sinister about those. I merely wanted to see what I’d look like as a princess and a maid. You understand, right?”
Princess_Pudding, who had been silent thus far, still said nothing. Instead she kicked thatguy in the face, again knocking him unconscious. She then hoisted up her elaborate dress and stomped up to Captain daigong, who was again berating Masa for something out of his control; this time, the weather.
“Damn it Masa, make it more sunny! This isn’t good enough… Why hello, Princess_Pudding! You are looking ravishing today, if I do say so myself, and I do, which is why I said it. Anyway, is there anything Masa can help you with?”
“I want thatguy over there put in the brig for the remainder of the journey. He is a pervert and a scoundrel!” she exclaimed, pointing.
“Alas, Madame, on the U.S.S. John E. Badass, perversion is not illegal, but encouraged!” proclaimed Masa proudly.
“Well I never!” and she stomped off once again.
Meanwhile, in the TV Tokyo building, a mysterious man had arrived. In his hand he had a pokeball. He went to the studio where they taped Hello! Morning and then called forth his pokemon, an insidious little one called psymon. During the filming of World Pucchi Games, he used psymon to control Morning Musume, and the entire set, save for one man he did not see. That one man, was tenkei, who had snuck in there.
tenkei managed to get a glimpse of the mysterious man through the set, and was surprised to see his old friend…
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poor TG :lol:
Masa and Dai :lmao: it's so damn funny cause they sometimes say weird shit like that in the chatroom :lmao:
suki the sexy assistant :drool:
genius again i say!! :thumbsup :thumbsup
now, i wonder who tenkei saw........ :o
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it's hilarious!
wish I was in it..
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it's hilarious!
wish I was in it..
omg, be careful what you wish for :O
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:lol:
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>.> <.< Why do I get the feeling in the next episode I'll be someone's condiment? XD
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lol Mayo
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I mean it! I'm probably gonna be used as a condiment with some weird "perverted" way of using me! XD
[if that makes sense, I just woke up. XD]
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I mean it! I'm probably gonna be used as a condiment with some weird "perverted" way of using me! XD
[if that makes sense, I just woke up. XD]
That would be soo funny. Can't wait till next one comes out
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XD
Kei=Genius
Me=Addicted to Doki Doki, Another Day at H!P, and this!
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I'm a saucy maid with a Latina accent that gets to punch someone's lights out?
WIN! :lol: Awesome job, can't wait for more of these, they're hilarious!