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Author Topic: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 3 (2017/08/15)  (Read 13255 times)

Offline love angel

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Re: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 2 (2015/11/17)
« Reply #20 on: November 18, 2015, 10:48:03 AM »

 Author sannnn!!!!
 How could youuu trying to kill me...
 Please update soon bcuz,
 Waiting is killing meee!!!!
 Btw i really like ur story

Offline deguchi

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Re: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 2 (2015/11/17)
« Reply #21 on: November 18, 2015, 11:56:58 AM »
Ooooooh I've been waiting!!
yay Mariko-neechan! Go Go Go
papa is the monster, huh
thanks author-san
just love to read alot of fiction story

Offline Kairi65

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Re: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 2 (2015/11/17)
« Reply #22 on: November 19, 2015, 01:42:32 AM »
Finally an update!   :yossi:

Kinda funny mariko and minami are sisters considering the difference of their heights^^"

Lastly, i wonder who is minami's partner? And what happen to the assassin before(which i assume to be atsuko)? And the time gap between the prologue and chapter 1..?

Ps, otsukare!

Offline Kirozoro

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Re: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 2 (2015/11/17)
« Reply #23 on: November 19, 2015, 04:18:21 AM »
An Update!!!!!!

So Mariko and Takamina meet?!? O-o

What are they going to do now?

Where did Acchan gone?

Update soon

Offline cisda83

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Re: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 2 (2015/11/17)
« Reply #24 on: November 21, 2015, 01:34:19 AM »
Who is the red dragon???

Minami's father?

What is it that Mariko wants with Minami?

What's going to happen next?

Can't wait to find out

Thank you for the update

 :twothumbs :twothumbs :twothumbs

Offline h_juri25

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Re: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 2 (2015/11/17)
« Reply #25 on: November 21, 2015, 12:24:23 PM »
This fic reminds me of Elfen Lied somehow. Really awesome.

Please update! I really like it!
Maaaatsui Jurinaaaaa! ❤❤

Offline RJay

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Re: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 2 (2015/11/17)
« Reply #26 on: November 23, 2015, 04:33:27 PM »
Hey lil' bro! :lol: XD

Wow! didn't thing that Minami and Mariko would be related at all :lol:. That really surprised me. But what's the deal with their father though? He seems to really hate his youngest daughter so much to bring her to a laboratory for human experiments. From what I read, Minami and Mariko's mother death seems to be one of the reasons, but there's no proof that Minami's birth is the cause of his wife death; maybe there's another reason somehow for him to despise Minami and call her a demon. Mariko seems to believe that her little sister is innocent.

Is 'The Demon' the name that the father gave Minami when he was chasing her or something?
And also, where did Minami's power or gifts come from?

Please update as soon as you can :) XD. Take your time; no pressure. Keep up the good work! XD :)
I'll say "I love you" to the person I love
Even if these feelings aren't returned, saying "I love you" to the person you love
That is the most beautiful thing in the world

Offline Haru_Jei

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Re: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 2 (2015/11/17)
« Reply #27 on: August 16, 2017, 03:45:19 AM »

@love angel: Hey! Sorry for making you wait so so long. It's been really tough on me these days; I hope you understand. I'm really glad you like my story and I thank you. Thank you for reading and commenting.

@deguchi: Yeah. Papa is a terrible person :lol: I'm glad you like it :) Thank you for reading and commenting.

@Kairi65: It has been awhile hasn't it. Sorry about that; with the lack of motivation and the writer's block, it's hard to continue writing, but I try to keep up with everything. Yeah :lol: Mariko and Minami are siblings; you can say that Mariko took over their father's height while Minami took over their mother's. About Minami's partner you'll find out in this chapter. Who knows, we'll find out who the assassin is soon enough. As for the time gap, let's just say its foreshadowing. Thanks for reading and commenting.

@Kirozoro: Most of your questions will be answered in this next chapter. Hope you'll enjoy it. Thank you for reading and commenting.

@cisda83: You'll find out who Red Dragon is in the future chapters. Thank you for reading and commenting.

@h_juri25: Yeah, some of sceneries will be like Elfen Lied, but it's not going to be exactly the same. I'm glad you like it. Thank you for reading and commenting.

@RJay: Hey aniki! What? :lol: It's good to surprise your readers (well only the good kind of surprises) You'll know soon enough why he's acting like that. I left some clues about it though. Mariko mentioned the naming of 'The Demon' to spite her father, but then again maybe he did gave that name. Minami's gifts will be known in future chapters. Thank for reading and commenting.

(A/N): Hey guys! It's been two years already!! I'm really sorry for not updating anytime soon. Many things has been going on that I had a hard time writing, meaning the lack of motivation and writer's block. It's been really hard. I hope you guys are not upset or think that I gave up on my stories; it's just that it's been difficult to find time and all. Well, anyway, I don't want to keep you waiting any longer. Here is the next chapter! I hope you'll like it and please do enjoy it too. Leave your comments and your question; don't be shy.


Chapter 3

After a good few more seconds of more staring, the smallest out of the three girls blinked back to reality as she suddenly grabbed her backpack and her baseball cap from the slightly taller girl’s hands and started to sprint on the opposite direction. The two other women looked at the small girl’s back in confusion for a second as they both stared at each other, and as their instincts kicked in they began to chase after her.

“Minami! Wait?!” Mariko called out as she and Yuko zigzagged through the crowd, tailing after her sister.

“No way in hell I am going to get arrested again.” Minami muttered under her breath as she sped up even more to lose her chasers.

“Yuko! We have to catch her no matter what!”

“Wait! What? Why?” Yuko questioned, asking herself why she too was running after her friend’s younger sister.

“I’ll explain everything later once we’re all alone with my sister.” The taller woman reasoned, adding, “But right now, you have to catch her because between the two of us, you are the fastest.”

“Fine!” The small woman exclaimed as she began to speed up, getting closer and closer to her target. Ever so slowly she reached her hand out, grabbing the hood of the smaller girl’s sweater and abruptly pulled her towards her, bringing her to an empty alley as her partner followed behind and helped her.

“AH! Let go! Let go!” Minami exclaimed as she tried to fight back.

“No way!” Yuko grabbed her handcuffs and cuffed the girl as Mariko finally caught up to them and had both her hands on her knees, trying to catch her breath.

“You’re lucky that we’re in broad daylight and in a middle of a crowd, ‘cause I would literally kill you by now.” The small girl threatened as her older sister straightened up to retort.

“No you won’t. I know you way too well. You wouldn’t kill anyone until you know you’re in danger.” She paused as she motioned Yuko to give her the keys and removed the cuffs. “Besides we’re not here to arrest you; we’re here as your clients.”

“Clients? How can I be sure you’re not lying to me?” The girl questioned as she crossed her arms over her chest, frowning as she looked around cautiously. “Who knows, maybe my so called father is watching us right now at a corner, waiting for you to take me to him and lock me up again and trying to kill me. I pretty much lost count on how many times he tried to kill me in the past.”

“I swear to God, otou-san is not here; he doesn’t even know we’re here.” The tall girl grabbed her sister’s hands and squeezed them slightly, reassuring her as she stared seriously into her eyes. “I’m telling you the truth. And I’m not going to let him lock you up again; that’s a promise.”

Minami looked back into Mariko’s eyes, trying to figure out whether she was being genuine or not, but all she saw was sincerity; she found herself stupid for doubting her older sister when she tried her best to help her when she was in trouble. Minami let out a sigh as she pulled her hands from Mariko’s grip and crossed her arms again, leaning her back on the brick wall. “Alright, I’ll trust you on this one. So what is it that you are requesting from me?”

“Can we talk about this in private? This is something really classified; not something that we can talk about in public.”

“It’s that serious, huh?” Both Mariko and Yuko nodded their heads as Minami began to walk out of the alley, motioning them to follow her. “Then, shall we go to my office and discuss this?”

“By the way Minami, this is Yuko; my partner.” As they walked, the tall woman introduced her partner to her little sister as they both shook hands and bowed at each other.

“Nice to meet you.”

“Same here.”

“And Yuko, this is my little sister, Minami, who also happens to be The Demon.” Yuko’s eyes were like saucers after hearing what Mariko stated, gapping at the smaller girl; looking at her from top to bottom like she had taken the form of an alien.

“Are you freaking serious? You’re The Demon?” Yuko whispered loudly as she looked around, making sure that no one heard her and cause a panic while Minami raised an eyebrow and nodded her head as her answer. “I’m sorry, honestly, I’d imagined The Demon to be a psychopathic person with a very crazy look in their eyes. I didn’t expect it to be an innocent looking girl like you.”

“Looks can be deceiving.” Mariko said as she wrapped an arm around her sister, bringing her closer to her.
“I really missed you kiddo.”

“I miss you too onee-chan.” Minami replied, wrapping her own arm around her older sister’s waist. “Ah! Before we head to my office, we have to stop somewhere nearby first.” With that, Minami put on her baseball cap and her hood back up again as they all walked towards their destination.

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

Somewhere in Tokyo, a man was sitting in his desk with an angry look on his face and all of a sudden he punched his computer monitor as it fell on the floor. Suddenly, he heard a knock on his door and he called them in as two women entered the office, approaching his desk. One of them had her head down in shame as she held her hands together in nervousness.

“You wanted to see me boss?” The woman asked as the other woman pushed her down to sit on one of the chairs and she walked and stood right next to her employer.

“Yes sensei; just explain to me what happen and then, I’ll decide what to do with you.” The man answered, his elbows resting on his desk and his fingers intertwined as he tried to look calm. “The laboratory has been destroyed and the police are taking custody of every subject in there and they realized that my prisoners were human test subjects.” The man rose from his chair, rounding around his desk and stood right in front of the female scientist as he looked down on her. “We’re lucky that that building used to abandoned and we just took it without anybody even knowing it, and that the building was not under my name or under my men’s name. Now tell me…”

“I don’t even know exactly what really happen. All I know was that the alarm went off and a guard came to me, telling me that the forbidden cell where The Demon was held custody was left open and empty.” After a slight pause, the woman lifted her head to look at her boss in the eye and continued, “The rest you all know. All the guards were armed and they all tried to stop that monster, but it was all in vain and she escaped. I was the only one left and I was really afraid to stop her alone.”

“I see.” The man turned to look at his employee and told her, “You may leave. I’ll call you when I need you.”

The young woman bowed to her boss and stared at the female scientist before leaving the office. The man turned to look back at the woman in front of him as he crossed his arms over his chest and pondered for a few minutes.

“As much as I want to fire you and dispose of you I can’t let you go. Because you are the best at what you do and I need you to help me find what I seek through all the experiments we do.” The man stood up from his desk and motioned the scientist to leave his office as he took out his phone from his pocket and dialed the young woman’s number. “I have a new assignment for you; go find The Demon, kill her and bring her dead body to me.”

At the same time, in a red convertible, the young woman responded and drove away from the small building.

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

The three young women were walking along the streets of Tokyo as the smallest among the three was walking ahead while the two others followed suit.

“Hey, Mariko.” Yuko whispered to her partner, hoping that the smaller girl in front of them wouldn’t hear them. “Is it still a good idea to tell your sister about the Red Dragon case? I mean, this case is really dangerous.”

“The Demon is already dangerous herself.” Mariko whispered back.

“Good point.” Yuko nodded.

Before Yuko could say something else, Minami entered a restobar as the bell at the door rang, announcing her arrival as a customer at the restobar. Without waiting for the other girls, Minami walked towards the bar as the owner came out of the storage room, noticing the three persons inside their place.

“I’m sorry, but we’re close at the moment, but we’ll open by lunch hours.”

Minami didn’t listen as she sat on a barstool, putting her hood down and removing her baseball cap. She gave a big smile to the owner as the owner looked a little surprise for a second and giving the girl a smile of their own.

“Hello, Miichan.”

“Takamina! Look who’s back unscathed; not a scratch in sight.” Miichan said as she grabbed a glass, putting a couple of ice cubes in there and poured roughly two shots of whiskey, and placed the glass in front of Minami. “Now that’s the Demon for you.”

Minami chuckled as she downed the contents of her glass in a swift. Miichan saw the other girls behind her best friend and invited them to sit down. She offered another drink, but Minami kindly declined the offer.

“How about you pretty lady?” She asked Mariko, giving her a charming smile. “Wanna drink?”

“No, thank you.” The tall girl politely turned down the offer as Miichan turned to Yuko, offering a drink as well as Yuko shook her head. “We’re on the job. We’ll have a glass of ice tea instead.”

“Well, that sucks.” The young owner frowned as she put the bottle of whiskey away and grabbed two other glasses, adding ice and poured ice tea she made earlier from the fridge. “Here you go ladies.” Miichan placed the glasses in front of them as they said their thanks.

“The one next to me is my older sister, Shinoda Mariko, and the one next to her is her partner, Oshima Yuko; they’re detectives from my so-called father’s police department.” Minami suddenly introduced the other girls.

“I’m Minegishi Minami, but you can call me Miichan.” The young owner introduced herself as she shook hands with Mariko and Yuko, turning back to Minami. “This is rare to see, especially from you Takamina. You, working with the cops.”

“Mariko is my sister; she’s the only person in the police force I can trust.” Minami said as she glimpsed at Yuko and added, “And if she brings someone she can trust and meet with me, then I can trust her partner as well.” Yuko discreetly sighed in relief as she smiled slightly, thinking that she could also trust this girl like her partner would.

“Anyway, after everything that happened since yesterday, I lost all of my belongings.” The smallest among the women got off the barstool, walking towards the entrance and locked the door. “I’m here to pick up my basic supplies.”

Miichan smiled and nodded, walking towards the back as Minami motioned the other girls to follow. As they all went to the back, they walked into the pantry as Miichan closed the door behind them and locked it. After locking themselves in, the young owner moved some boxes aside and behind those boxes was a hidden door. Miichan entered the code, scanned her handprint and her eyes and the door opened. On the other side of that door was a large room filled with all kinds of weapons, there was tech area as well, and at another corner what looks like a chemistry lab.

“What is this place?” Yuko asked as she and Mariko looked around the room in awe. “Some of these weapons are illegal in Japan.”

“I am Takamina’s loyal supplier.” Miichan announced. “Whatever she wants, I’ll supply them for her; whether they’re weapons, drugs, or any type of access cards and other techs. Just so you know she’s my only customer.”

The young owner walked towards the back of the room and picked up a briefcase at the bottom shelf. Placing the briefcase on the table and opened it to make sure everything was in there as Minami browsed around the weapon area and walked towards Miichan, watching her.

“Here you go! A loaded glock 17, two full magazines, a box of 9mm bullets, 20 throwing blades and a garrote wire.” Miichan listed the contents in the briefcase as Minami just closed it while placing a smartphone on the table and grabbed her bag to take all of the cash she found in the house she robbed.

“You don’t want to double check everything?” The young owner laughed, grabbing the phone and walked to her computer to set it up.

“No need. I trust you.” Minami also laughed, following the other behind and handed in at least a hundred thousand yen. “Sorry Miichan, this is what I was able to steal at the house after my escape.”

“You broke into a house?!” Yuko asked as Minami shrugged and explained that it was no big deal and that she didn’t leave a single trace of her.

“No worries, my friend.” Miichan took the bills, finishing the work on her computer and disconnected the phone from it. “The burner phone is on the house.” She handed the smartphone to the small girl. “You know, you didn’t have to pay for anything; I should be the one paying you. You saved my life after all.”

“What are you talking about? You may be the owner of this restobar, but I still, technically, own the building; you’re paying rent for this place and you’re living here too. The only thing I can do for you is pay for your services.”

“Alright then. If you say so, boss.”

Both girls smiled at each other as they walked out of the room and locked it, and out of the pantry, and out  of the back room. Minami gave her thanks as the three young women walked out of the restobar and head towards their next destination.


“Miichan mentioned that you saved her life. What did she mean by that?” Mariko asked as she and Yuko each went by her side.

“Miichan used to take part of the yakuza business.” Minami answered and continued, “Her father couldn’t get a loan from the bank to keep his own business afloat, so he borrowed money from another source; the yakuza. Of course, he wasn’t able to pay his loans back on time, therefore, he asked for an extension. The loan sharks eventually extended his dues and warned him to pay them at a specific date or he would be more than just be physically injured.”

“Let me guess. He couldn’t pay them after his extended time, right? And made Miichan pay for his debts?” Yuko asked as she crossed her arms and shook her head in disapproval. “What a terrible father.”

“Worse. He didn’t asked his daughter to help him pay his debt; he sold his only child to the yakuza as payment.” Minami paused and explained, “Miichan was really good in chemistry, which means chemistry equals to drugs. She produced and dealt drugs for them, and since she was sold to them she would do just that for the rest of her life.”

“With all that, she wouldn’t be able to live a normal life.” Mariko said as she asked, “How are you involve in this?”

“Miichan was my classmate in highschool; I didn’t know her very well at that time.” The small girl said as she explained how she met the restobar owner later on. “One day, I found her out of breath like she was running away from something or someone while I was working. I brought her to my place to hide and I asked her what was going on, and she told me her story and that she was running away from the yakuza she worked for. She explained to me that she wasn’t able to reach her quota and they were after her ass.”

“How were you able to get her out of the business? It’s difficult cut ties from the yakuza; once you join, the only way to get out of the group is either get killed or be killed.” Yuko mentioned the obvious, but still curious how the small girl saved her supplier.

“I formulated a planned to get her out for good. From what Miichan told me before, the head of the business didn’t know anything about her, so it made my job easier for me to do so. I provided her with some cash to pay up her quota, and when she would meet the head of the family as I followed her and blend in, and that’s where I put my plan into play.” Minami said while she texted her partner with her new burner phone to tell her that she would be at the building very soon. “At first, it was only to convince the family boss to release and let go of Miichan if he didn’t want the police to know where his headquarter was, but since he saw I was alone with no backup whatsoever, he decided to bring the whole family to the area to beat the hell out of us. We were outnumbered and obviously I couldn’t take them all alone with my normal strength alone. I convinced Miichan to leave me and run to my place while I took care of them. With her gone and with no witnesses, I annihilate that yakuza family completely alone.”

“You decided to become the Demon that day.” Yuko stated not really asking a question to the smaller girl. “I remember that case really well, but it wasn’t your actual M.O. From what I remember from the Demon’s old cases, your M.O is overkill; dismembered body parts, blood everywhere, unrecognized victims, but it wasn’t case for that yakuza family; the case was listed as a yakuza war.”

“I made the cops believe that it was a war among the yakuzas.” Minami admitted. “I didn’t want my father to know I was there and try to hunt me down like he always does.”

“Makes sense to me.” Mariko said.

“After that, she asked me if she could work for me since she didn’t finishing her education and without a degree, and with her background she couldn’t have a regular job. I agreed to her offer and opened up a business as long as she continued to supply me with items that I needed and paid me rent. That way, she would somewhat live a normal life.”

Minami suddenly stopped in front of a building, and looked up as she smiled, feeling like it has been a long time since she left, but it had only been a day.

“We’re here guys.”

They all walked into the building as they went up the stairs to enter a room and they were greeted by a really beautiful woman about the same height as Mariko that made Yuko’s mouth drop to the floor.

Minami told the woman something before she headed out of the room as the woman walked to her desk to grab some papers and a file and brought Mariko and Yuko to Minami’s office and introduced herself.

“Hello, welcome to Takahashi consulting. I’m Kojima Haruna; Minami’s partner.” Haruna motioned the detectives to sit down and make themselves comfortable while they waited for Minami.


Meanwhile, Minami entered her apartment which happened to be in the same building as her workplace. She put her bag and her briefcase in her bedroom as she undressed and went in the bathroom to take a quick shower.

Once she was done, she put on a business look with black dress pants, a mauve dress shirt, a black and white striped tie, a nice black vest, and good pair of black dress shoes. She grabbed the briefcase, opened it and took her weapons out. She hid her throwing blades and her garrote wire all over her body. Lastly, she grabbed her gun and her ammunitions as she opened her closet, moved a part of the wall at the back of the closet and entered the code for her safe and put the items in there and lock it as she placed back the wall.

Minami walked out of her apartment and went downstairs to her workplace. She entered her office, watching the girls talking as Haruna gave her papers.

“Alright.” Minami sat on her chair as Haruna stood behind her, both smiling. “Welcome to Takahashi consulting! I’m Takahashi Minami; the owner of this establishment and a private investigator. How may I help you today?”

To be continued


Well, that's it for now. I hope you enjoyed that, I also hope you guys will be sticking around. I'll try my very best to write the next chapter and update this story ASAP. Again, like always, please don't be shy to leave you comments or your questions. If ever you have some non spoiling serious questions don't hesitate to leave me a PM. Until next time!

Offline RJay

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Re: [AtsuMina] The Immortal Demon - Chapter 3 (2017/08/15)
« Reply #28 on: September 05, 2017, 11:54:40 PM »
Hey again lil' bro! It's been a while.

Great update.
Looks like Mariko and Yuko met Miichan; who has quite an interesting background. Pretty scary how they had to deal with the yakuza in order for her to get out of the business.
I wonder what the Red Dragon wants with the scientist's experiments, and what does he want with Minami. What exactly is he looking for anyway?

Please update soon. Don't make us wait longer. Waited for at least two years for this update.
I'll say "I love you" to the person I love
Even if these feelings aren't returned, saying "I love you" to the person you love
That is the most beautiful thing in the world

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