JPHiP Radio (20/200 @ 128 kbs)     Now playing: Blackpink - Whistle (acoustic ver.)

Author Topic: Complete  (Read 10240 times)

Offline rndmnwierd

  • Subleader of Tsunku's Army
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 4824
  • What has been seen cannot be unseen.
Complete
« Reply #20 on: January 28, 2007, 10:49:51 PM »
I don't know what else to say but I LOVE YOU! Let me come be your fangirlie stalker! This is so incredible and deep and still in your own unique writing style. I'm dying for more.
« Last Edit: March 17, 2007, 10:46:40 AM by rndmnwierd »

Offline Owaranai_sLaVe

  • Right now it's... KKANGPAE SHIDAE!
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 2161
  • Does Don Jess have to slap a bitch?
Complete
« Reply #21 on: February 20, 2007, 07:13:00 AM »
x_X Ugh, please tell me you're continuing this. My YoCharMi dramatic love triangle needs some feeding..badly...

Love the metaphors. I love the deep thinking thoughts as well.

-Owaranai_sLaVe
>>LIFE ~is just another story~2008/12/26<<
Please Spread The Love; Pervy Thinkers Association

Offline erink

  • Member+
  • Posts: 441
Complete
« Reply #22 on: March 17, 2007, 04:28:24 AM »
I'm going to hell.
I used to be vaguley aware of this.
This minor little thing I felt inside me.
Not saying that I was a really horrible person,
Just saying that I did a my fair share of things that would qualify me(I bet you know more than a few of those). And
if I wasn't going before,
if I was really just being hard on myself,
if the standards that I thought were set by whoever it is that runs it were off,
Then I have certainly cleared all tiny insignificant specs of doubt.
I'm going straight to hell.
For sure, yo.
Don't comment on that last bit. Just let me have my moment.
So why is it?
Why is it that I am destined to spend my life in eternal suffereing?
Why is it that I'll be rubbing elbows with Hitler and Stalin?
Why else would it be?
Reason Number One:
She is absolutely gorgeous.
Okay, okay, this all goes back to personal preferance and opinion, but
I guarantee
That it would be easy for any person to find at least one thing attractive about her.
Guarantee.
So what do I do with this gorgeous girl?
I spend my time thinking about someone...
Someone,
That's rather impersonal, isn't it?
I spend my time thinking about you.
Ah there we go, that is much better.
That's horrible.
But I'm sure if you, for some reason, skipped some of the other things I have mentioned, you might say,
But that really isn't that bad, cause if she isn't a good person...
Which brings us to
Reason Number Two
She is a good person.
I wish I was one of those people that was lucky enough to get stuck with a beautiful girl who was absolutely wretched.
Because then,
every single thought
every single action
can be justified on the premise of her being a bad person, and bad people deserve to be treated badly.
If only things could work that way.
Not only is she a good person, she is the epitome of good people everywhere
At some place
Some where
I am absolutely sure there is a statue errected in her honour.
Honestly, you could even push wholesome. How many people our age can fall into that category that
A) aren't in some cult guised as a religous group and
B) don't live under a rock.
A really
Really
Big rock?
Hell, just thinking about her I can picture her in some plain jane dress singing on a flower covered hillside with brids and vairous furry woodland creatures scurrying about and basking in her beauty.
What have I gotten myself into?
This isn't what I signed up for.
I applied for the standard get dicked over hard and long
have fun picking up all the broken peices of your life once this is over
and don't ever expect to see any of the money you spent on me every again.
That's how it always is,
That's what I always get.
You know I don't like change.
You know I have a hard time dealing with it minor or big.
You know what, I'll get back to the list later.
Right now I just think I am going to curl up in a nice dark corner and scream
why me?
over
and
over
again until I cry myself to sleep in truly depressing fasion.
« Last Edit: March 17, 2007, 04:34:32 AM by erink »

Offline Owaranai_sLaVe

  • Right now it's... KKANGPAE SHIDAE!
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 2161
  • Does Don Jess have to slap a bitch?
Complete
« Reply #23 on: March 17, 2007, 06:59:13 PM »
Sigh, once again, it's just too good. You've really hit a nerve in me, especially since its so coincidental that something similar is happening *not to me though*. But I would assume this is what my friend is talking about. Heh.


I'm glad you've continued it ^_^

-Owaranai_sLaVe
>>LIFE ~is just another story~2008/12/26<<
Please Spread The Love; Pervy Thinkers Association

Offline Ren

  • ワーイε=ヾ(*・∀・)/
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 277
  • I'm a girl!
Complete
« Reply #24 on: March 18, 2007, 06:51:39 PM »
I am so curious about who are the characters O_O

Great fic! :)

Offline rndmnwierd

  • Subleader of Tsunku's Army
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 4824
  • What has been seen cannot be unseen.
Complete
« Reply #25 on: March 19, 2007, 02:42:05 AM »
Wow, that was a beautiful metaphor. Or a broken one or something.

Offline rndmnwierd

  • Subleader of Tsunku's Army
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 4824
  • What has been seen cannot be unseen.
Complete
« Reply #26 on: March 19, 2007, 02:44:07 AM »
Heartwrenching.

Offline nkcac

  • Member
  • Posts: 29
Complete
« Reply #27 on: March 20, 2007, 02:00:34 AM »
this is seriously awesomness, waiting for more

Offline Owaranai_sLaVe

  • Right now it's... KKANGPAE SHIDAE!
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 2161
  • Does Don Jess have to slap a bitch?
Re: Complete
« Reply #28 on: May 04, 2007, 04:15:35 AM »
>__> *SUPER PUNCH* Bump'd
I hate bumping, usually because it seems like I'm nagging. and I hate nagging. But I just really like this story, so angsty and poetic in a way. Definitely different from your comedy fic, and that's in an awesome way.

-Owaranai_sLaVe
>>LIFE ~is just another story~2008/12/26<<
Please Spread The Love; Pervy Thinkers Association

Offline erink

  • Member+
  • Posts: 441
Re: Complete
« Reply #29 on: May 04, 2007, 11:19:57 AM »
Haha, the bump is okay.  In all actuality I was writting another section of this last night, but with the forum problems I just decided to finish it up today.
« Last Edit: May 04, 2007, 11:23:31 AM by erink »

Offline erink

  • Member+
  • Posts: 441
Re: Complete
« Reply #30 on: May 04, 2007, 08:44:08 PM »
Caught by suprise, without an umbrella.
Thats what it took for me to realize
what this feeling is.
We were just walking,
like always, nothing
special
or
extrodinary about it.
Just walking.
All of a sudden, a rain
the really shocking rain
that sneaks up on you in the middle of a beautiful day started.
The rain drops were massive, when they hit you,
you felt it.
felt it soaking your clothes
felt it chill you to the bone
They were so big that they made a loud steady noise as they
ping
panged
splashed
over all the surfaces
cars
houses
us.
I grabbed her hand
and I ran.
Just ran
the kind of run where you don't think, you just move your body
moving by feeling,
by instinct
and we both ran, getting completely soaked
we ran to a tree and when we got there
huddling together we laughed.
looking up through vision distorted by hair that had been plastered to our faces,
the tree was nothing more than a glorified twig.
the branches were small and weak.
it had a noticeable absence of leaves.
our shelter wasn't so much of a shelter.
I lowered my head, and looked right at her.
There she was, looking back at me
I kissed her.
Right in the middle of that pouring rain
Right in the middle of it all
I knew.
I knew,
that I loved her.
I knew.
I knew,
that she was the one.
There's only one problem.
That didn't happen with her.
It happened with you.

Offline Owaranai_sLaVe

  • Right now it's... KKANGPAE SHIDAE!
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 2161
  • Does Don Jess have to slap a bitch?
Re: Complete
« Reply #31 on: May 05, 2007, 02:55:52 AM »
Holy crap, last few lines got me. Man, I just can't help but totally dig Love Triangles. Best kind of triangles, totally beats the geometric ones, dammit.

My guess:
Yossui's the torn one who is with Rika but loves Miki.
Or, this one of those sneaky fics that smack me on the ass and it's a Miki (as the confused girl) who's with aya, but Miki likes ...Yossui or Rika. hahaha, I can live with that.

Can't wait to read more! (Good to know my nagging bumping was a waste then!)

-Owaranai_sLaVe
« Last Edit: May 05, 2007, 04:54:56 AM by Owaranai_sLaVe »
>>LIFE ~is just another story~2008/12/26<<
Please Spread The Love; Pervy Thinkers Association

Offline Ren

  • ワーイε=ヾ(*・∀・)/
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 277
  • I'm a girl!
Re: Complete
« Reply #32 on: May 10, 2007, 02:20:01 PM »
Yossui's the torn one who is with Rika but loves Miki.
Or, this one of those sneaky fics that smack me on the ass and it's a Miki (as the confused girl) who's with aya, but Miki likes ...Yossui or Rika. hahaha, I can live with that.
For me, I think it is Yossi who is with Miki and likes Rika O_O.
But now I'm not even sure they are really H!P characters :D.

Good to see an update, can't wait for more :).

Offline erink

  • Member+
  • Posts: 441
Re: Complete
« Reply #33 on: May 26, 2007, 04:05:00 AM »
People always ask
                              What do you want to be when you grow up?

I thought
thought hard
                                                                      and long

about my
                                                       answer

I could never narrow the jobs down
they seemed endless.
As I got older I decided on one simple thing.
Things like how much money I
                                      made

How many things I had,
where unimportant.
It would be nice to have them but
I thought I could live without it
My answer was one
                                                         simple

thing.
                                                     I want to be happy.

I didn't care what I was doing.
Where I was doing it.
I just wanted to be happy
That was my answer.
That was my goal.
That was my plan.
So why'd you have to go and ruin it?
---------

Formating is an absolute bitch. Don't hold your breath on seeing it again.(more than that, it drives me nuts that the text changes) Somewhere inbetween being MIA and throwing an update up out of guilt my style shifted rather noticeably and kind of derailed whatever sort of flow I had going. I think you can find the sections I'm talking about. We'll see.

Offline JFC

  • Miki's Birthday Twin
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 28564
    • jfcantalejo
    • jfcantalejo
Re: Complete
« Reply #34 on: May 26, 2007, 04:55:48 AM »
Yeah, it's definitely a bitch all right, but in this case the hard work definitely pays off. I absolutely LOVED how you separated those particular lines from the rest of the text. I read them together, then I read the "separated" lines just on their own.  Veeeeeeeeeeeeeery nicely done. :)

JPH!P :heart:'s kuro808, Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline rndmnwierd

  • Subleader of Tsunku's Army
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 4824
  • What has been seen cannot be unseen.
Re: Complete
« Reply #35 on: May 26, 2007, 08:07:52 PM »
Wow, that separte text message thing was cool, I wouldn't have thought of doing something like that.

You know, a guilt chapter is better than no chapter my friend! Now, if only someone doesn't use that on me...

Offline Owaranai_sLaVe

  • Right now it's... KKANGPAE SHIDAE!
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 2161
  • Does Don Jess have to slap a bitch?
Re: Complete
« Reply #36 on: May 28, 2007, 09:16:42 PM »
Damn, formating does seem like a bitch.
Sigh, so dramatic! Keep your awesome-nes flowin' man!

Owaranai_sLaVe
>>LIFE ~is just another story~2008/12/26<<
Please Spread The Love; Pervy Thinkers Association

Offline erink

  • Member+
  • Posts: 441
Re: Complete
« Reply #37 on: June 12, 2007, 04:49:08 AM »
Will you knock it off?
Acting like that,
You're not going to live forever, you know?

Of course I know.
Undoubtedly my
Time's got to be up sooner or later

Well I want it later, not sooner.
As if It doesn't matter,
You're out of control.

Don't bother,
On the off chance something happens,
Which, I'm not saying it will,
No worries, I've got a pretty resilient body.


All I lack is a resilinet heart.
But you probably already knew.

------
Five points for the first person to figure out the alternative(or main, depending on perspective) way of reading it.

Offline JFC

  • Miki's Birthday Twin
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 28564
    • jfcantalejo
    • jfcantalejo
Re: Complete
« Reply #38 on: June 12, 2007, 06:11:58 AM »
First letter of each line. If you read them from top to bottom, they say "WAY OUT WAY DOWN AB". Dunno what the "AB" is supposed to mean though. :dunno:
« Last Edit: June 12, 2007, 06:12:54 AM by JFC »

JPH!P :heart:'s kuro808, Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline erink

  • Member+
  • Posts: 441
Re: Complete
« Reply #39 on: June 12, 2007, 11:36:29 AM »
haha, ignore AB. I needed that last little twist in there and try as I may I doubt I am creative enough to build something around AB. Although, after I typed that I figured I could have continued the trend with C but it's entirely to late for that now.

JPHiP Radio (20/200 @ 128 kbs)     Now playing: Blackpink - Whistle (acoustic ver.)