Author Topic: Rivalry, Friendship, or Love? - Prologue (SayaMilky) 02/06/2016 (Read 3587 times)

Mirukii's · « **on:** February 06, 2016, 05:29:43 PM »

あなたはそれだけで愛のために、必要なものでしょうか？

Rivalry, Friendship, or Love?
ライバル？友情？または愛？

Does she know? How much it hurts me to pretend that we're okay? No, it's not okay. We're not okay. The management told us that we need to be rival and shit. Which made the two of us, somehow avoid each other. It hurts me, to see her not caring about me. It kills me when I will hug and kiss someone, just to grab her attention. I want her to know that she's the only reason why I'm still clinging to my idol life. No matter how many times we will tease each other on live broadcast, it was scripted; I know. But those small moments with her, it was one of the reasons why I am so happy to go to practices and to some variety shows. We're both busy because of work and other stuff that we should do as an idol, though I really can't tell her that I want to be her friend. But no, not just a friend. As a lover. I want to tell her the feelings that I've been hiding since the beginning. I am sick and tired of everyone treating us like a rival. I want that to stop. I want to be the reason why she's happy; but it seems impossible. But I will not give up.

She doesn't know, how much it hurts me to see her; kissing and hugging someone. That should be me, I should be the one who should be doing those stuff with her. Though it will only be part of my crazy delusions, because the management taught the two of us to be rivals. I don't want the two of us to be stuck as rivals. I want us to be friends...more than friends. I know the stuff that we're doing on televisions was scripted. But if I am going to be honest, I enjoy those moments with her. But it seems like the management and the gods above will have to disagree with me. I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I want to get to know her even more, it has been almost 6 years. I want the two of us to be close. I want her and I need her to know that she's the reason why I'm being me right now. There are times that we will avoid each other. Probably because we thought the rival aura will always be there behind us. But no, not this time. I will not allow this rival thing to be the issue when it comes to my feelings towards her.

I don't care if I'm going to break the rules, because I love her.