JPHiP Radio (17/200 @ 128 kbs)     Now playing: Discord - T-208

Author Topic: More Than One Story...[111016 Loving You Forever]  (Read 236724 times)

Offline lil_hamz

  • Sapphire and Nouveau... like it should've been
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 2569
  • She makes every summer sweet, every moment happy
Re: More Than One Story... [Fairytale]
« Reply #120 on: July 17, 2008, 07:07:23 PM »
Turtle bean power! :lol: That does have a nice ring to it. I'm gonna take you up on that offer KonaKaga. Angst and fluff eh, that's a tough choice to make. Is it possible to include both? :P When is that road trip of yours? I'll try to come up with the next chapter by then, if I can :D Woah everyone is in a corner eh, that is one lucky corner. Sukoshi you should definitely join in XD Thanks for all e lovely comments gals - AmberSan, ringo-hime, JFC & of course lollipopgirl. *grabs everyone to hug* (I think this beats groping in the dark corner) :)
« Last Edit: July 17, 2008, 07:15:23 PM by lil_hamz »

Offline poets

  • The forgotten Writer
  • Member+
  • Posts: 201
Re: More Than One Story... [Fairytale]
« Reply #121 on: July 20, 2008, 02:18:31 AM »
* was not hugged *  :cry: *eats brownies in her lonely corner*
Rika <3 So funneh

Offline strawb3rrykream

  • JPHiP's official imouto <3
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 6408
  • Kimuuu's girl <3
    • strawb3rrykream
    • strawb3rrykream
Re: More Than One Story... [Fairytale]
« Reply #122 on: July 20, 2008, 04:22:14 AM »
OH MY GAH!!!!
lil_hamz!!!! I can't believe I missed TWO, not one, but TWO great stories~~~ :(
The first one.... :lol: Sayumi and her Idoling shirts!! But Gaki and her manly-hotness!! :drool:
The second one.... :wub: I was swooning!!! Prince Gaki and Princess Ai.... :inlove: Reina and her death-grip was XD Koharu makes a great wingman! *sarcasm*
« Last Edit: July 21, 2008, 01:52:33 AM by strawb3rrykream »

Offline KonaKaga

  • Member+
  • Posts: 193
  • GakiKame now and forever
Re: More Than One Story... [Fairytale]
« Reply #123 on: July 20, 2008, 08:23:40 PM »
Turtle bean power! :lol: That does have a nice ring to it. I'm gonna take you up on that offer KonaKaga. Angst and fluff eh, that's a tough choice to make. Is it possible to include both? :P When is that road trip of yours? I'll try to come up with the next chapter by then, if I can :D Woah everyone is in a corner eh, that is one lucky corner. Sukoshi you should definitely join in XD Thanks for all e lovely comments gals - AmberSan, ringo-hime, JFC & of course lollipopgirl. *grabs everyone to hug* (I think this beats groping in the dark corner) :)

I have written you your story, hopefully you'll like it....it's a pervy one :-X If you want a sequel then look forward to it. If you don't like the story I shall write you an angsty-fluffy one.
Lol I'm on the road trip now. I arrived here in Maine yesterday evening after driving for 12 ish hours. Well at least 3/4 of all of the holiday's travelling is done :) It's really pretty here, I might post some pics.
Hehehe the corner is getting very tight if you know what I mean.... :twisted: We just need to wait for Sukoshi now... :roll:
Anyways, I hope that you'll like the story!


Credit to Clamy-san!
Visit my blog!

Offline Regent

  • ecchi
  • Member
  • Posts: 34
Re: More Than One Story... [Fairytale]
« Reply #124 on: July 21, 2008, 01:28:34 AM »
Aw... the Cinderella themed fics are adorable. It's making me more impatient!

I loved your writing style and word choice for "Fairytale." You definitely gave it that fairytale feel, and I could visualize the scene very well from your description.

And I liked your interpretation of Koharu as the herald.  :lol:

Offline lil_hamz

  • Sapphire and Nouveau... like it should've been
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 2569
  • She makes every summer sweet, every moment happy
Re: More Than One Story... [Fairytale]
« Reply #125 on: July 22, 2008, 06:27:18 AM »
* was not hugged *  :cry: *eats brownies in her lonely corner*

You WERE hugged poets. Gah, I knew I should've been more clear in my post. *Makes it up with a hug just for poets*

I have written you your story, hopefully you'll like it....it's a pervy one :-X If you want a sequel then look forward to it. If you don't like the story I shall write you an angsty-fluffy one.
Lol I'm on the road trip now. I arrived here in Maine yesterday evening after driving for 12 ish hours. Well at least 3/4 of all of the holiday's travelling is done :) It's really pretty here, I might post some pics.
Hehehe the corner is getting very tight if you know what I mean.... :twisted: We just need to wait for Sukoshi now... :roll:
Anyways, I hope that you'll like the story!
I read it yesterday and I loved it! :) But I didn't comment yet since I wanted to do that after posting this chapter of GA. I was  :kekeke: :shy2: and :imdead: the whole time I was reading it though. I liked the one you just wrote, but could I still look forward to the angst+fluff one? You know I can't have enough of KameMame :wub: Oooh Maine eh, must be fun *envious* Yeah, I totally get what you mean. How could that corner fit so many? :D I vote we should just move to some other spot :lol:

strawb3rrykream: You're back! Do you mind if I hug you too :P

Regent: Hey, hey, new reader. Thanks for reading and commenting. Hope to see you around more often. Say....wanna join us in the corner, or that new spot? XD

And finally the next chapter of "Guardian Angel." I'm not 100% happy with this but... I hope you gals (& guys --> especially for JFC :P) who have waited for this aren't too disappointed *crosses toes in addition to fingers*


Guardian Angel: Chapter 3
Trying To Pull Myself Away

 
"Reina?"

The wobbly and uncertain voice asked of the blurry face near her own. She had only just reopened her eyes after the last time she closed them on the hillside where the terrible accident had occurred. Now as she found herself underneath a thick blanket of a soft bed, she found it hard to believe she had survived.

"Hey, how are you feeling?"

The voice that answered confirmed her identity and Eri sunk deeper back within the reassuring depths of the warm sheets. Reina's familiar presence soothed her and with Reina, Eri felt she could let her guard down and say anything she wanted.

"Like crap."

Hearing those words leave Eri's lips made Reina chuckle. This was totally unlike Eri, in fact it sounded more like what she, the self-proclaimed yankii would utter.

"You're okay now. Just rest and let me take care of everything."

"Does everything include me?"

Eri still felt drained but she also felt the need to continue speaking to Reina. She didn't want to feel alone again. That feeling wasn't one she liked and she didn't want to relive the moment of feeling as helpless and afraid as she did in the ravine. Having Reina here to accompany her somehow made her heart beat slower and breathing calmer.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Faking mock annoyance, Reina exclaimed dramatically. Her actions made Eri laugh. Yes, this was what should take place when good friends spent time together - talking, laughing and just generally having a good time. The horrible silence and heavy hearts that were to follow the announcement of heartbreaking news should never be allowed to penetrate the veil of happiness. And so Reina decided against ladening Eri with the critical issue that had transpired. That will have to wait. At least until the turtle girl was well on her way to complete recovery. 

"I'm fully capable of looking after any unwell human. And I would appreciate if that unwell person, you, listen to and abide strictly by every single one of my instructions. Thank you very much."

Ending her little speech with a slight bow, Reina grinned impishly at the tickled girl lying on the bed.

I wish I could keep you blissfully ignorant. If only you could remain in the dark forever.

-----
 

The young woman standing outside one of the hospital wards had been rooted there a long time. One of her hands rested on the door of the room in an action that appeared to want to push it open. In spite of this, her body refused to heed and she hesitated once more before finally swinging open the entrance. Cautiously walking inside, she cast her eyes on the bed and realized that its occupant was not only alert but had come to gaze back at her.

"Gaki-san, you're awake!"

The tenor in Ai's voice betrayed her astonishment at seeing the patient not resting. Her initial plan of keeping her visit clandestine was no longer feasible.

"I have some things on my mind preventing me from sleeping."

The small smile the younger offered did little to allay the uneasiness that was mounting within the elder.

"Is there something?"

Having spent more than a few years beside her leader, Risa could detect by a single expression or change in tone of voice that Ai was troubled or preoccupied with something. The circumstances now were a classic example of that situation and Risa could tell at a glance from Ai's face that there was going to be a solemn conversation.

"We need to talk. Actually, I have some things I need to say."

Closely her eyes and reopening them sharply, Ai resolved to go through with what she had set out to do. After spending an hour lounging in the bathtub during the time she had gone home to clean herself up, Ai had considered her options and settled on the decision she thought most appropriate. The hardest part of it was deciding how best to convey her thoughts to Risa. It was probably best to go with the truth. Risa would understand.

"I don't know when it started. But I began to realize your change in attitude towards me. The transformation is overwhelming and I'm uncomfortable with it."

"I'm making you feel uncomfortable?"

The disbelief was evident in Risa's voice as her weary mind processed what Ai had just said. Were these really the words that Ai had confessed. Did she, while trying to devote her entire being to the one person she admired so much through the only manner she knew how, merely served to push the girl she adored further away?

"I don't mean... what I mean is....Gaki-san, you understand don't you?"

Risa lowered her eyes from Ai's face. She could no longer bring herself to look into the prodding eyes of the young woman she had loved for years if all she was going to divulge were words that would break her heart.

"You are saying that you want me to stop...stop loving you."

Her reply came as a shock to Ai. Did the words she had expressed essentially imply that. All she wanted was for Risa to not alter the way she behaved around her. She needed some time to sort out her own feelings and decide on the direction in life she wanted to take. Before she could fully understand herself, she didn't want to be entangled in anything that would distract her from her work. Performing was more important than life itself and Ai didn't want to endanger her career for a relationship that might not even work out. Falling in love might sound sweet and exciting at first but could they really sustain it? Ai didn't want a sea of change in their present relationship if they were to try and fail. Conversely, she didn't intend for Risa to stop loving her. She had misinterpreted her intentions. Still, Ai realized she had to continue the lie. It was too late to turn back. Perhaps it would turn out to be for the best. As leader and sub-leader of the group, what kind of example would they be advocating if they were to be in a relationship. How was she to explain to the other members. Was it right? The million of questions and potential whiplash convinced Ai this arrangement was for the best.

"This might sound cruel but I hope you understand. Singing is important to me. I don't want to lose it."

If there were a way to listen to the goings-on within a person's body, the sounds that one would hear from Risa now would be the soft splintering of her heart. She was defeated before she had even started. Ai had rejected her and it appeared that the conclusion would stay the same no matter what else she was to do. What could she say except to accede to the last task that Ai had requested her to accomplish? And so Risa obliged, she would seal up every single emotion she had for Ai in the depths of her heart for all of eternity.

"I promise I wouldn't do anything that would hamper your future, Ai-chan." 

Beneath the thin white hospital sheets, Risa had unconsciously gripped at her left wrist as she and Ai spoke. Her fingernails dug into the bandage covering the gash and subsequently split the wound open, releasing a fresh round of dark crimson blood. The self mutilation somehow relieved the pain she was feeling in her heart as the damp fluid cooled her feverish skin. She could be permanently maimed and she wouldn't care for without Ai in her life, little else would be of significance.

"Thank you."

Making a gesture that she would be leaving, Ai took a step back from the bed. Her body language was a world apart from the usual. Before this, she would have wriggled onto the bed to keep Risa company, particularly when the girl was sick. But now she couldn't step within two feet from Risa without feeling the weird tension and awkwardness that had materialized between them.

"Ai-chan..."

A choked voice rang in her ears and Ai knew Risa was trying her best not to cry. She was aware that her sub-leader was holding back her flood of tears to minimize her guilt. Even now Risa persisted in looking out for her and deep down, her consideration touched Ai. Did she make a mistake? Ai didn't know. An invisible fire ignited inside her and the blaze razed her soul to ashes. And along with it, a feeling Ai didn't want to expereince again.

"Please let me hold you for the last time."

If Ai's last request was to end everything there was between them, Then Risa's final plead was to be allowed to etch in her memory the sensation of having the lover who was not to be solely to herself. And so Ai complied. Bending down over the bed to embrace Risa in a tight hug, Ai laid her head in the crook of Risa's neck.

"I'm sorry."

-----

 
"Reina was just over at Eri's. She's fine now by the way. Her leg is recuperating well."

"How is the temperature in the room? Let Reina know to turn it up if it's too cold."

"Yikes, Reina forgot to wash the apple before eating."

The dialogue was carried out by one individual as the other person in the room made no effort to reply the barrage of sentences sparked by the petite girl. The scarlet apple fell from her hand as Reina let her fingers go limp and her body sink to the floor. Now on her knees, she brought her shaking hands up to cover her face before lashing out with fury.

"Speak to Reina! Sayumi! Answer me!"

Her elfin face scrunched up with an aggrieved expression as she cried torrents of tears from her wonky and normal eyes. Staying in that position and crying her heart out, Reina for once didn't care if somebody saw her. She had barely managed to hold back the tidal wave of emotions in front of Eri. However, now that she was alone with the cold and lifeless body of Sayumi, Reina could no longer hide her sadness.

"Don't ignore Reina. You always said Reina could come to you whenever and you would do your best to help. You can do something for Reina now. Wake up, WAKE UP! That is the only thing Reina wants."

Crawling over to the bedside of the single metal crib on her hands and knees, Reina clutched fearfully at the clothing of the figure lying peacefully on the bed. She was paler than usual, quieter than normal and yet still so beautiful with her long ebony hair framing her delicate face.

"In Hawaii, at the theme park, on Haromoni, all those times Sayumi. Reina could only smile because of you. Even if you can't do it for me, do it for Eri. Please, open your eyes."

The figure remained motionless and Reina prayed that Sayumi's eyelids would flutter or her fingers would tingle as she cupped them in her hand. Except there was nothing, the only movement in the ward was that of the clock's second-hand as it ticked steadily past. Nothing disrupted the tranquility of the atmosphere, absolutely nothing.

"Reina won't tell Eri about this. You're gonna have to wake up and tell her yourself."
« Last Edit: July 22, 2008, 08:38:31 AM by lil_hamz »

Offline takagakifan

  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 226
  • ^_^
 :shocked:
You killed SAYU!!?? :mon waterworks: AND TAKAGAKI :mon runcry:

this was so good my eyes actually started to water though I'm weak like that I cried in Ice Age.. hmm maybe I shouldn't admitt that poor Reina... poor Eri... poor Ai :mon surr: I can't handle this much angst *goes off to bed*
No one on the corner got swagga like us!

Offline poets

  • The forgotten Writer
  • Member+
  • Posts: 201
Re: More Than One Story... [Fairytale]
« Reply #127 on: July 22, 2008, 07:18:37 AM »
^sayu's not dead... she's in coma.

Quote
You WERE hugged poets. Gah, I knew I should've been more clear in my post. *Makes it up with a hug just for poets*
*swoons*
 
Quote
"Reina was just over at Eri's. She's fine now by the way. Her leg is recuperating well."

"How is the temperature in the room? Let Reina know to turn it up if it's too cold."

"Yikes, Reina forgot to wash the apple before eating."

The dialogue was carried out by one individual as the other person in the room made no effort to reply the barrage of sentences sparked by the petite girl. The scarlet apple fell from her hand as Reina let her fingers go limp and her body sink to the floor. Now on her knees, she brought her shaking hands up to cover her face before lashing out with fury.

"Speak to Reina! Sayumi! Answer me!"

Her elfin face scrunched up with an aggrieved expression as she cried torrents of tears from her wonky and normal eyes. Staying in that position and crying her heart out, Reina for once didn't care if somebody saw her. She had barely managed to hold back the tidal wave of emotions in front of Eri. However, now that she was alone with the cold and lifeless body of Sayumi, Reina could no longer hide her sadness.

"Don't ignore Reina. You always said Reina could come to you whenever and you would do your best to help. You can do something for Reina now. Wake up, WAKE UP! That is the only thing Reina wants."

Crawling over to the bedside of the single metal crib on her hands and knees, Reina clutched fearfully at the clothing of the figure lying peacefully on the bed. She was paler than usual, quieter than normal and yet still so beautiful with her long ebony hair framing her delicate face.

"In Hawaii, at the theme park, on Haromoni, all those times Sayumi. Reina could only smile because of you. Even if you can't do it for me, do it for Eri. Please, open your eyes."

The figure remained motionless and Reina prayed that Sayumi's eyelids would flutter or her fingers would tingle as she cupped them in her hand. Except there was nothing, the only movement in the ward was that of the clock's second-hand as it ticked steadily past. Nothing disrupted the tranquility of the atmosphere, absolutely nothing.

"Reina won't tell Eri about this. You're gonna have to wake up and tell her yourself."

I know I don't have to quote all of this.. but i HAVE to quote all of this. DUDE!!!!!! DUUUUUDDEEE!!
You killed me. YOU FREAKING killed me. I'm so catatonic right now I don't think i'll be able to write my own stuff for weeks! I knew something was up with Sayu, but the way you presented, the writing, the flow, the set-up was just simply heartbreaking. I pride my self for not crying in sad stories.... but you this ruined it for me. IT was soooooooooooooooooooo heart wrenching! I shed two tears. True, only two but that's more than most get.

Man that was amazing! Can't get over it :lol: Gah i'm feeling bipolar towards you right now. I love you, I hate you, I love you then I hate you. I think the realizim about it was what made it uber awesome.

The chapter as a whole was incredible as expected from it's incredible author but again... that ending just was the cherry that sealed the deal. the only thing i'm incredibly sad about is that now i'll have to wait for the next chapter.


Rika <3 So funneh

Offline JFC

  • Miki's Birthday Twin
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 28564
    • jfcantalejo
    • jfcantalejo
Quote
I hope you gals who have waited for this aren't too disappointed
Did my name suddenly change to "chopped liver"?


Quote
"Reina?"

The wobbly and uncertain voice asked of the blurry face near her own. She had only just reopened her eyes after the last time she closed them on the hillside where the terrible accident had occurred. Now as she found herself underneath a thick blanket of a soft bed, she found it hard to believe she had survived.

"Hey, how are you feeling?"

The voice that answered confirmed her identity and Eri sunk deeper back within the reassuring depths of the warm sheets. Reina's familiar presence soothed her and with Reina, Eri felt she could let her guard down and say anything she wanted.

"Like crap."
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! SHE'S ALIVE!!! :banana:

But where's Risa? :?



Quote
Reina grinned impishly at the tickled girl lying on the bed.

I wish I could keep you blissfully ignorant. If only you could remain in the dark forever.
Uh oh. :O



Quote
"I don't know when it started. But I began to realize your change in attitude towards me. The transformation is overwhelming and I'm uncomfortable with it."

"I'm making you feel uncomfortable?"
Eh?



Quote
"You are saying that you want me to stop...stop loving you."
EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!?!? :o



Quote
Her reply came as a shock to Ai. Did the words she had expressed essentially imply that. All she wanted was for Risa to not alter the way she behaved around her. She needed some time to sort out her own feelings and decide on the direction in life she wanted to take. Before she could fully understand herself, she didn't want to be entangled in anything that would distract her from her work.
Well...in a way...her thinking does make some sense. It wouldn't be the best thing to get into a relationship when she's not sure of how she feels of what she wants. It wouldn't be fair to her or to Risa.

Still sucks though. :(



Quote
"Ai-chan..."

A choked voice rang in her ears and Ai knew Risa was trying her best not to cry. She was aware that her sub-leader was holding back her flood of tears to minimize her guilt. Even now Risa persisted in looking out for her and deep down, her consideration touched Ai. Did she make a mistake? Ai didn't know. An invisible fire ignited inside her and the blaze razed her soul to ashes. And along with it, a feeling Ai didn't want to expereince again.

"Please let me hold you for the last time."

If Ai's last request was to end everything there was between them, Then Risa's final plead was to be allowed to etch in her memory the sensation of having the lover who was not to be solely to herself. And so Ai complied. Bending down over the bed to embrace Risa in a tight hug, Ai laid her head in the crook of Risa's neck.

"I'm sorry."
:gyaaah: :mon waterworks: :pen_cry:


OMGASS SAYU!!! :OMG: :OMG :OMG:

JPH!P :heart:'s kuro808, Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline anammm

  • のぼせてた
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 694
  • KamenRenja
*pops out of nowhere*

:stunned:

^sayu's not dead... she's in coma.
SHE BETTER BE!!!!!!!!!!
Don't kill my Sayu, seriously. I'm srs here. as hell srs.
As much as i like drama and loved this story, I hate you now for making Sayu go though this. I'm dead srs. Wake. Her. Up! :grr:

Yossi <3 Rika <3 Timu Ke <3

Offline Regent

  • ecchi
  • Member
  • Posts: 34
Thanks for the welcome! *joins you in the "new spot"* I've been lurking for a while and catching up, but I was feeling
guilty because I had feedback to offer.

Regarding chapter 3 of Guardian Angel...

As heartbreaking as the scene between Ai-chan and Gaki-san was, I see it as a logical and realistic choice for Ai to make given her ambitions... but what cruel timing. Poor Risa, you could really feel the depth of her pain when you described her reopening her wounds.  :cry: I have a hard time believing you would leave it like this though, so I can help but think Ai may reconsider her choice.

Sayumi... I hope she really does wake up before Eri finds out. I mean, if this is how Reina reacts, it's hard to imagine what it will do to Eri.

I like that you write in Reina's little idiosyncrasy of always refering to herself in third person. :D Nice work, looking forward to the next chapter!

Offline Sukoshi

  • Member+
  • Posts: 1243
  • Forever in love with the turtle and the hare
USO DA!!!!!!!!!!!!  Gah! How could Ai chan be so cruel!!  I just don't believe it!  She must have hit her head or something during the crash!  Yeah..that must be it! or...or maybe she thinks Gaki's better off with Eri...*Sukoshi tries to convince herself of the possibilities but fails*  why Ai chan~ why~!!   :farofflook:  There must be a reason!!...sadly only you know the answer *stares at Hammy san in an attempt to read her mind......but fails* darn it.  :fainted:


*breathes* ....*breathes some more*


I will not quote the entire last segment because Poets kindly already did  :heart: but !

ERI~~~!!!!!  I mean SAYU!!!!!!!!!!!!  my god the last half had me in tears once again :k-sad:  I want to hug Reina so bad :pen_cry: 

*warning wild thinking coming up! prepare to roll your eyes*

Reina's last sentence caused me to worry and think up all sorts of crazy things....I mean what if Sayu's waiting to hear Eri's voice yet Reina's never gonna tell Eri...and Eri's not going to be able to move about on her own for a very long time so she can't wander about and discover Sayu in the hospital on her own...and Ai chan's all in her cruel world so she's not going to tell Eri anything either..*shakes fist*...meanwhile in Sayu's absence, Reina and Gaki shower Eri with love in hopes of distracting Eri...yet it only leads Eri to think Sayu really does hate her since she never comes to visit..oh what have you done Reina~!  :gmon tears: *ends wild thinking*

okay...I honestly don't believe my random thoughts XD...after all I really liked the last sentence...it was really sweet and touching...it made me really love Reina for her determination *sigh I want to hug her again*  okay...even if it takes like 20 chapters, you have to make Sayu wake up!   You just have to!  The last time Sayu died in a sad story...I almost ran out of tissue paper... :cry:

*breathes again*

oh! oh! on a final note, should I believe my eyes?  Is this story going to have SayuxReina!?  even if it's one sided?  if so...whoooo! I like! I like a lot!  I also liked your reference to hawaii..etc...the way Reina talks about Sayu is just so endearing these days  :heart:

anyways I better end my post before I think of some more to say and kill my exclamation key...XD  but I'll just add in the obvious before I hit the reply key~  Hammy san~ SAIKOU~!  *hugs*  :wub:

Chapter 3 ~daisuki~

Offline stefy

  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 654
OIEEE bugger!!! You said no one died!!!!! Or is Sayu just in a coma??

See THIS is why I was afraid to read this fic!! haha.

But damn.. I feel sorry for Gaki, she always gets the heartbroken roles huh. But I guess that's probably just something typical of Ai-chan to do. Performing is going to be her number one love, while Gaki-san can.... be chucked aside. I kinda cringed when you wrote how she opened her own wounds again.. hah.

I thought someone was reporting what Reina is doing or.. some spirit was watching Reina. Until I realized it was just Reina referring to herself. Hoho....

REINA ERI MOMENT WAS SOO SAWEEEEETTTTT~

Offline poets

  • The forgotten Writer
  • Member+
  • Posts: 201
Reina's last sentence caused me to worry and think up all sorts of crazy things....I mean what if Sayu's waiting to hear Eri's voice yet Reina's never gonna tell Eri...and Eri's not going to be able to move about on her own for a very long time so she can't wander about and discover Sayu in the hospital on her own...and Ai chan's all in her cruel world so she's not going to tell Eri anything either..*shakes fist*...meanwhile in Sayu's absence, Reina and Gaki shower Eri with love in hopes of distracting Eri...yet it only leads Eri to think Sayu really does hate her since she never comes to visit..oh what have you done Reina~!  :gmon tears: *ends wild thinking*


*LAUGHING MY FLIPPING ASS OFF*

Sukoshi wild thinking = Ichiban

XD


Rika <3 So funneh

Offline lollipopgirl

  • Forever with us JABBY! <3
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 4693
  • It's all about the girl love!
I with poets on this... I hate you and I love you, but mine is mostly hate right now! :P

 :angry: HOW COULD YOU BREAK TAKAGAKI!!! Surely Ai will wake up to herself and realise that Risa should come before anything else... God you would think almost losing her forever to the darkness of death would make her never want to risk loosing her again! but nooo, you had to make her go freak out, get scared and back away from Gaki instead  :mon headbang:
I was hoping when she hugged her she would feel the fresh blood or something and notice how much pain she was causing her best friend and take it all back :mon cry: Please let that happen  :mon innocent:

Then for another reason I hate you right now... SAYU!!! You know how much I love Sayu now so you go throw her in a bad coma  :mon runcry:  We don't even know what happened to her and yoy may just go and kill her *gasp*   :thumbdown:

Poor Reina, she's trying to be the strong one for Eri and she was for Ai when she first found her (and she probably still is) so she is taking on the burden from everyone else... No wonder she just cracked when she was with Sayu, she needs her! As narcissistic as Sayu is, I get the feeling she is the kinda of person how will drop absolutely everything and be the pillar of strength for her friends whenever they need her, but now all she can be is a block of cold stone  :mon waterworks:
Reina can't keep this from Eri forever though, she is bound to ask about her beloved bunny sometime soon and I'm sure she will see right through Reina if she tries to lie, they know each other too well... But then Eri can demand the truth, run (or wheel fast if she needs a chair coz of her leg) to Sayu's side (despite the protests that she needs to rest) and once Sayu senses her there, she can wake up :D

What I really really really don't want to happen is: Sayu dies (DER!), Risa becomes Eri's support, and Gaki settles completely for Eri to also help her forget about Ai... Blah! :P

Please let Ai heal Gaki's wounds, both physical and emotional... She needs her  :mon surr:

And finally, the last reason to hate you:
You killed me. YOU FREAKING killed me. I'm so catatonic right now I don't think i'll be able to write my own stuff for weeks!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Don't you dare! :mon fire: See what you've gone and done now Hammy, tsk tsk!

But regardless of everything I've said above, I still love you coz despite all the angst and pain, that was some really magically writing there! So incredibly powerful and I'm surprised you weren't happy with it coz I certainly am... I didn't cry like I did in chapter 2 but I think that's coz I was too tired :lol: But hey, at least you got poets too :D
For you :heart:  :gmon flowers: :gmon heartu: :mon kissy:

*stays in corner pouting with her arms crossed while everyone else goes to the comfy, warm 'new spot'* :mon pissed:

EDIT: I forgot to add, you capture the emotion behind and sensation (for lack of a better word) of 'self-mutilation' perfectly! It's somewhat easy to write things like that on a shallow level, but being able to delve into that on such a level that you do to make it all the more emotional, is certainly not the easy thing... I'm glad you've, I guess you could say 'done it justice' as it's something that is too often misinterpreted.
« Last Edit: July 22, 2008, 07:05:08 PM by lollipopgirl »

Offline strawb3rrykream

  • JPHiP's official imouto <3
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 6408
  • Kimuuu's girl <3
    • strawb3rrykream
    • strawb3rrykream
*takes the initiative to hug lil_hamz first* Yes, you can hug me too! :lol:
Poor Reina, I could tell it was killing her to see Eri. Like she wants Eri to know, but can't hurt her. AHHH! Takagaki issues! :( Why must Ai-chan be sooooo like that?! Can't you see this gorgeous woman loves you!? And then Gaki is no better, hurting herself and letting Ai-chan leave. These two need help. BADLY! Reina was sooo cute talking to COMATOSE Sayu. But it hurt my heart to read her breaking down like that. :OMG: Sayu needs to wake up, there are too many ppl that can't live without her. :mon cry:

Offline KonaKaga

  • Member+
  • Posts: 193
  • GakiKame now and forever
:mon freeze:
So...much...ANGST!

:O :O :O
Sayu's in a coma! NO! She has to wake up! :cry: Seems like the 6th Gen are stuck in some sort of love polygon. I'm not too sure about Eri or Risa though :?
Reina->Sayu
Sayu->Eri
Eri->?
Risa->Eri
       ->Ai
Ai->Risa(?)

Ahh! Risa, make up your mind!!!

Quote
I liked the one you just wrote, but could I still look forward to the angst+fluff one?

Of course =3 I'm just trying to figure out what my story line should be, unless you have one you want written?

Quote
You know I can't have enough of KameMame :wub:

Too much of a good thing is wonderful :D


Credit to Clamy-san!
Visit my blog!

Offline lil_hamz

  • Sapphire and Nouveau... like it should've been
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 2569
  • She makes every summer sweet, every moment happy
Surprise!! A new fic!! Shocked? *Hee hee* This fic is kinda outta there so I hope it sits well. Tell me what you think after reading. Can you guess who the 2 unusually named characters and the host are? Oh and I apologize to JFC for leaving his name out in the "Guardian Angel" update :P Special mention goes to Sukoshi for being such a sweet person and nominating my fic for this month. This is also a belated birthday prezzie for KonaKaga :)



Glass Slipper
Chapter 1: C/C Cinderella Concoction


“That will be 5400 yen please.”

From the rearview mirror, the cab driver discreetly eyed the three young females huddled closely in the back seat. They had given him strict instructions to send them to Tokyo’s Kabukicho district as soon as they got into the vehicle. While the area was hardly the place for innocent girls like them to be hanging around at, he chose to remain silent as his role as a driver didn’t allow him the liberty of questioning the actions of his customers. He could only pray in his heart that these ladies knew what they were getting themselves into by venturing to an area also known by its other, more infamous tag - the “sex district” of town.

”What are we doing here?”

One of the three women asked in a rather frightened manner, her voice quivering as she noticed the groups of shady looking men wandering about. A passing group of middle-aged men walked passed the girls and unashamedly studied them from head to toe, no doubt undressing the attractive girls in their minds. A place where few good men roam but sleazebags abound was no place Eri wanted to be in and her rigid thinking wasn’t led by her own morals alone. If her traditional cum authoritarian family discovered she wasn’t hard at work studying in the university library, she would surely be punished severely and grounded for a month or more.

“De-stressing.”

The shortest of the lot said with an easy smile.

“If I study anymore my brain’s gonna explode!”

She made short and swift actions of moving her hands away from her head to illustrate how bits of her gray matter would fly if her brain were to really explode.

“We could go shopping or catch a movie or, or, something somewhere. But not here!”

“There’s nothing wrong with trying out new things once in a while. Besides, Reina’s paying.”

Pulling on her BFF’s wrist, Sayumi led the way into one of the buildings in the vicinity where a recent mushrooming of clubs had occurred.

-----

"Wait, WAIT!"
 
The elevator doors slid open noiselessly and Eri saw at once down the hallway, the brightly lit doorway of what she presumed was the club her friends were taking her to. Clamping their hands onto their victim’s arms, the duo ushered the kicking and screaming girl towards the glittering entrance like a pair of unyielding bodyguards.

"Let's not do this."

Her desperate plea fell on deaf ears as her strikingly stunning companions didn’t falter in their long strides ahead. They were determined to break their friend out of her usual comfort zone. After all, when the most daring thing she has done in all her twenty years of age is to catch a midnight movie, desperate measures must be carried out.

"You need a little excitement in your life. I promise you'll be thanking us for bringing you here before the night is over."
 
The girl with the long black hair guaranteed confidently as her big round eyes shined with dazzling radiance. This was going to be an experience for her as much as it was for her timid friend.

"Yeah, it'll be fun. Come on, the host is right ahead."

-----

"I think this is a mistake. We could get into real trouble."
 
Looking around the darkened surroundings warily, the unwilling party of the group crossed her arms across her chest and clasped both hands on her limbs as if to protect herself from an invisible force.
 
"The only trouble we might get into is if Reina’s dad found out we were patronizing a place other than one of those her family owns."

Pointing at the young woman currently lounging directly opposite on the cushy orange couch made to resemble a pumpkin carriage, Sayumi leaned back and sank her slender frame further into the soft cushions.

“I’ll just tell daddy I was checking out the competition.”

With an impish smile, Reina picked up the leather bound book sitting on the low table. The gold wordings glistened rhythmically with every change of the club’s flashing lights.
 
"Getting into an upright position when she saw Reina pouring assiduously over the menu, the dark-haired maiden asked in a low voice.

“Any good?”

Passing over the menu above the table to Sayumi’s outstretched hands, the petite girl sitting nearest to the entry of the cozy booth replied.

“Hmmmm, yummy.”
 
"Are you two done with that yet? I'm feeling a little hungry. I guess I could do with some food."
 
"Food?"

The disbelief was followed closely by the uninhibited shrieks of laughter that both girls emitted.
 
"Oh my god, Eri! I knew you were innocent but this, THIS is too much!"
 
Reina clutched at her stomach and bent over until her head was almost buried in those knobby knees of hers.
 
"Huh?"
 
Blinking at Reina, Eri didn’t understand what she had meant. What was so innocent about asking for food? This place did serve food right? What else was a menu for?

"Eririn, the menu, is for picking out who you want to accompany you for the night. For example, if you happened to take a fancy to the host who showed us in, you could pick him. He was rather cute. That Chinese accent was kinda sexy."
 
"Accompany me? Why would I want to be accompanied? Wait…don’t tell me, this is what I think it is?!"
 
The shock was too large for the protected homebody. She has never ventured into night spots or veered far from her usual routine of school, home and the occasional shopping trip. 
 
"Bingo! This is a host club. Host clubs have been around for more than four decades, the first one reportedly opened in Tokyo in 1966."
 
Reina raised a finger to her chin as she recalled the correct known year of establishment for the culture that has spawn the appearance of numerous host clubs. However the rare show of knowledge by the dimmest bulb of the trio failed to impress Eri. 
 
"A host club?"

Putting one hand on her forehead, Eri tried hard to make heads of what was going on. By now she had gotten a fairly good idea. She was just conned into coming to a host club, first formed in 1966, yeah she remembered what Reina had said, on a night where she should be studying fervently for a big test.

Clapping her hands enthusiastically as if to show off her smartness at getting the date for the male version of the Geisha correct, Reina calmed down soon after and patted Eri reassuringly on the leg.
 
"Don’t worry so much. We're here to enjoy ourselves so forget about everything else."

-----

With both hands stuck into his trousers pockets, one of the chosen princes leaned back against the shelf displaying endless rows of foreign liquor and waited as he watched the two other princes get ready the drinks which were to be served to the newest customers of the club.

“What are you getting her, Taka?”

“From my observation, she’s a feisty one. She could probably hold down some hard liquor. But where’s the fun in getting her smashed too quickly? I’ll start her off with red wine.”

Pulling open the wine fridge located below the preparation area. The prince with rather short hair and dressed in a dark jacket over a crisp white shirt replied, the silver tie dangling lazily from his neck.

“Champagne for me. She seems like a bubbly one.”

Rolling his eyes at the bad joke, the one with longish brown hair pulled into a low pony-tail pushed himself up from his half leaning position and grabbed a chilled cocktail glass off the rack. Swiftly mixing together lemon, orange and pineapple juices with ginger ale and finishing with a dash of grenadine, he garnished the elegant looking mock tail, aptly named Cinderella with pineapple and orange slices.

“You’re serving her non-alcoholic?”

Taka asked surprised at his buddy’s choice of beverage. It was one of the cheapest drinks on the drinks list and not nearly overpriced enough to land them a significant cut in commission for helping the club sell heavily marked-up alcohol to its clients.
 
“Yeah. That’s not gonna get you much earnings.”

The youngest of the three guys remarked. Named Prince Kuu, his nickname was derived from a play of his real name. The most childish yet tallest of the three, he hardly listened to others talk as it was mostly all about him.
 
“I don’t want her to get a hangover the next day. I can tell she’s a newbie.”

Shrugging his shoulders, Prince Taka slung an arm over his pal’s shoulder.

“Always looking out for the customers at your own expense. No wonder you and your sis lead such hard lives.”

-----

[Eri’s Point of View]

“Good evening ladies!"
 
We looked up to see three guys clad in sharp looking suits staring back at us, each of them holding a different drink in their hands. Even in the dim lighting, I could tell the princes were handsome. I would have even started smiling foolishly if not for the fact that all this was too much to take at one time. This was my first experience of visiting a club and now, not only have I done it without even knowing, I got myself a guy booked for the night.
 
I think I'm getting a headache.
 
"Which of you lovely ladies called for me? The most fashionable of them asked with a seductive wink. He wore his tinted hair in a messy cut and flipped his silver tie between his fingers.

"I'm Prince Taka."
 
"Ooh me, me!"
 
Reina shot her hand up into the air immediately and beamed so wide she reminded me of a little girl who had just received her favorite candy bar. Scooting over to the middle of the couch where I sat, she squashed me slightly as she made space for the new arrival.
 
"And I'm Prince Kuu, also known as cool."
 
The joke was unbelievably lame but it managed to induce tickled giggles from Sayumi who patted the empty space next to her lap twice.
 
"I did, Mr. Cool."
 
Staring at my friends with my mouth agape, I wanted to disappear from the place or dig a six-foot deep hole and throw myself face first into it. Were these the same two people who have always claimed how popular they were with boys? Then why are they flirting so outrageously here?

The last of them came to sit down beside me and handed me the tall glass in his hand. The colors of the beverage swirled brilliantly and I gazed fascinated until his voice broke me out of my reverie.

“First time here?”

The low and husky voice sounded somewhat sexy, nevertheless I refused to fall into the trap so blatantly laid out by my supposed friends.

“I don’t have to answer your question. And, I wasn’t the one who chose you.”

I thought it was an excellent rebuttal on my part and I even acted a little standoffish to accompany my speech. Apparently he saw through my act straight away.

“Yep, first time here alright.”

He leaned forward and rested both elbows on his knees. His fringe fell in a hypnotizing motion and covered one of his eyes. Nodding to no one in particular, he subsequently turned to smile amusedly at me.

“Prince Gaki at your service, whether you were the one who chose me or not.”


« Last Edit: August 13, 2008, 09:11:22 AM by lil_hamz »

Offline lollipopgirl

  • Forever with us JABBY! <3
  • ecchi
  • Member+
  • Posts: 4693
  • It's all about the girl love!
XD XD XD How the hell did you come up with this idea :lol:

Reina, so rebellious and sex kittenish! :drool: Sayu being much the same as Reina with her knowledge and happiness being there doesn't surprise me either... Poor little innocent, niave Eri, she was the one who chose them as friends after all :P

I'm actually really enjoying the Prince Gaki/Kame-chan fics, who woulda thunk it!?
Can't wait for the continuation of this  :mon lovelaff:

Btw, can you give me the address of this Host club where I can order myself a Prince Gaki or Tak? :drool: Thanks!  :mon blood:

Oh, and sorry for the short comment this time :( I still <3 you regardless :heart:

Offline KonaKaga

  • Member+
  • Posts: 193
  • GakiKame now and forever
ehehehe...
EHEHEHE
BUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
*squeals then dies and goes to heaven*
:imdead:
This is the BEST birthday present I have ever gotten!  :luvluv1: :shy2: :onioncheer: :tama-apeshit: :mon angel: :pig red: :mon lovelaff:
Aww, Eri's so inncocent XD Food!
Quote
The last of them came to sit down beside me and handed me the tall glass in his hand. The colors of the beverage swirled brilliantly and I gazed fascinated until his voice broke me out of my reverie.

“First time here?”

The low and husky voice sounded somewhat sexy, nevertheless I refused to fall into the trap so blatantly laid out by my supposed friends.

“I don’t have to answer your question. And, I wasn’t the one who chose you.”

I thought it was an excellent rebuttal on my part and I even acted a little standoffish to accompany my speech. Apparently he saw through my act right away.

“Yep, first time here alright.”

OMG OMG OMG
XD

Quote
He leaned forward and rested both elbows on his knees. His fringe fell in a hypnotizing motion and covered one of his eyes. Nodding to no one in particular, he subsequently turned to smile amusedly at me.

“Prince Gaki at your service, whether you were the one who chose me or not.”

:mon crazyinlove:

Wait a sec...I was going to write a fic which had some of the momusu girls as boys and in it they were the school prince's XD Coincidence? Who knows...

I just realised something...this says Chapter 1! Do you know what that means?!
There's going to be more chapters!
:w00t:

I am SO waiting for the update!
Ahh, this story's made me hyper!

Quote
I'm actually really enjoying the Prince Gaki/Kame-chan fics, who woulda thunk!?

You're falling for their charm :twisted:


Credit to Clamy-san!
Visit my blog!

JPHiP Radio (17/200 @ 128 kbs)     Now playing: Discord - T-208