Not Goodbye"Wah! You've updated quite a bit!"
Sayumin exclaimed in a surprised manner as she scrolled through the Chinese's girl's online blog. Taking my attention away from my bento lunch, I looked up at my kouhais talking animatedly until I noticed a faint change in expression on the bunny's face. In the second after, she too glanced up and happened to catch my eye. As if she was feeling guilty about something, she quickly averted her line of vision. Then focusing back on Lin Lin, she abruptly changed their topic of discussion. Her bizarre actions weren't lost on me. Excusing myself from the group seated in a circle on the dance studio floor, I got up and slipped out of the room.
Once I was out the door, I took my phone from my sweat pants pocket and accessed the Internet function. When the latest entries from the Sina blog had loaded, I clicked on a random post to read. As my eyes scanned through the sentences, I felt my heart plummet to my feet. Why?
"Gaki-saaaaan, where did you go? We are about to start!"
Kame hollered immediately upon my reentry into the play rehearsal area. Forcing a small smile, I willed my tone to sound normal as I replied her query.
"Washroom."
Throughout the rest of the day, my performance was less than stellar and I could not concentrate on anything that was going on. Naturally I kept stumbling over my lines and holding everyone up. Eventually, the director lost his temper and announced the end of today's rehearsal.
"What a great waste of time!"
Dumping her jersey into her bag with more force than necessary, Reina complained, standing up from her squatting position whilst she prepared to leave. Beside her, Aika flashed me an apologetic look and ran off after the disgruntled kitty. Noting the awkward atmosphere, Sayumi piqued cheerily.
"How about we do dinner at the shabu shabu place? I think they are having a promotion this month. We get to stuff our faces at half the regular price!"
Glancing over at Ai, I raised one brow, hoping that she would agree. Unfortunately, her reply wasn't something I had wanted to hear.
"Lin and I already have plans. Maybe another time?"
That's it! I've had enough of this. Lin Lin this Lin Lin that. Now she has even started calling her 'Lin?' Does she have to be so affectionate towards her? She doesn't even call me by my first name! I'm just Gaki-san to her. As I picked up my gym bag and turned to leave, I didn't bother hiding the scowl on my face.
She can stay with her all she wants if she likes Lin so much! -----
"Hee hee." *hic*
Eri's face was totally flushed and she had a silly grin on her face as she swayed a little. Clearly she had reached her alcohol limit. I knew that the turtle didn't have a high threshold for liquor but still I had insisted on ordering the sake. I should have known that she wouldn't let me drink alone. Such was the character of the sweet and understanding Kame. Sometimes I wonder why didn't I fall in love with such a lovable girl. Eri was beautiful both inside and out. And we shared so many things in common that I was sure she was my soul mate.
Unfortunately, my heart has been stolen years ago by another and I have never gotten it back since. Moreover, if I were to make any move on the kouhai I was closest to, the quick-witted bunny with the razor sharp tongue would be up in arms and after my blood in a split second.
Taking a big sip from the cup in my hand, I watched the pair intently, observing how gently Sayumi was behaving to the person she liked. Eri had by now fallen asleep on her lap and with eyes filled with deep fondness, Sayumi stroked her brown, medium length hair.
I couldn't help the grin that tugged at my lips. They were such a cute pair and with all my heart, I wished that they could be together one day. They were good people and deserved to be happy... with each other. If only Kame could realize it sooner, that the person who has been there for her the entire time, had been right there with her all along.
"Gaki-san?"
"Eh?"
I murmured softly, drawn out of my thoughts by the sole sober member in the private restaurant room.
"It's late, let me see you home and Eririn after."
Pressing on the button located on a small device placed on the table, I called for the bill. Waving my hand, I brushed off the plan that the middle rokkie had suggested.
"You can take Kame home. I'll leave after settling the tab."
"But.."
Unsure of whether she should take my advice, Sayumi hesitated. I was aware that she was studying me, making sure that I was indeed capable enough to make my way home safely. After a while, she relented and slung both their bags over her shoulder. Supporting Eri to the door, Sayumi looked back before leaving.
"Be careful okay?"
-----
There weren't many cars on the road as I walked home. I didn't trust myself to take a cab in case all that rocking caused me to barf. It wouldn't be a pretty side. Furthermore, I didn't feel like getting into an argument with the driver if I were to really puke in his vehicle.
Pulling my scarf tighter around my neck, I cursed at the awful weather. What's with the freezing temperature in spring? Kicking at any random object that happened to find its way beneath my foot, I exerted a large force, wanting to send the aluminum tin or pebble as far as I could. This was my method of relieving my frustration. Perhaps I should take a leaf out of Eri's book and try screaming into a bathtub full of water once in a while.
Sigh, I wonder what they are doing now.By they, I meant my 'best friend' and her favorite junior. They are spending the night at Lin Lin's place, doing god knows what!! My anger towards how close they have become is increasing by the day. I could no longer look at Qian Lin and maintain an unbiased attitude. Whenever I remember how much more time Ai spends with her than me, I feel this surge of animosity explode within me. Love can be a scary thing, as I have come to realize after falling for the face of Morning Musume.
"Maybe I should just go after Tanakacchi and save myself all this agony."
I laughed to myself, not noticing that a car had come spinning round the corner at breakneck speed. When I finally noticed its presence, the automobile was heading straight for me.
"Watch out!"
I felt a strong tug pulling on my forearm and I fell backwards onto a soft surface. Disoriented from the alcohol in my blood and the shock of almost being mowed down, I slowly sat up, stunned and unable to speak.
"Gaki-san, are you alright? Are you hurt?"
A voice laced with concern entered my ears and I lifted my eyes to look at the person who had saved me. It turned out that the 'soft surface' I had fallen on was the body of the person I loved but also hated.
"Ai-chan?"
"Thank goodness you are fine."
Embracing me, she wrapped her arms around my torso and buried her face in the nap of my neck. A part of me was ecstatic that Ai would make the first move to hold me like this. I had dreamed of this for far too long. However, when I thought of how these hands had done the same to a certain Chinese member, I couldn't contain my fury.
"Get yours hands off me!"
I tore away from a flabbergasted Ai and struggled to stand up on disobedient legs.
"Why are you here? Why are you hugging me? Shouldn't you be with Lin Lin? Letting her wear your pajamas and sleeping together?"
"What are you talking about?"
She was obviously confused at my sudden outburst. Coming towards me, she stretched out her arms, wanting to calm me down. With every step that she took, I moved back.
"You like Lin Lin don't you? Are you two already in a relationship?!"
By this time, I was no longer thinking straight. I couldn't remember exactly what I had said but I knew they weren't nice remarks.
"Why are you treating me like this? I thought we were best friends."
Tears streamed down the sides of her face and her eyes became red and puffy. I had hurt her, hurt Ai. The person I swore to myself that I would never let any harm befall. Yet I didn't stop my attack, never halting my accusation that she had let somebody come between what we had painstakingly built up over the years.
"How could you say this? I wasn't the one running off to be with Eri and Sayumi!"
"I didn't RUN OFF to be with them! We agreed that I would take care of the 6kkies and you the 8 gen. So this is my fault now? Making sure they have no problems is my fault?"
Wiping away the tears with the back of her hand, Ai bit on her bottom lip. I guessed she was controlling herself from saying something she might regret. Normally, as the dependable and reliable sub leader, I should be the one pacifying such arguments, not being the initiator. So why was I screaming like a mad person now? There was only one reason. Anything involving Ai with another drove me insane.
"You're drunk. I'll see you home."
"Don't, I'll see you home me! Get away from me. I can't bare to look at you right now."
Twisting my head away from Ai, I walked past her, our shoulders brushing in the process.
In the end, the one you picked to take away your tears and loneliness isn't me."Gaki-san!"
I heard Ai call out but I didn't turn back. I couldn't, not when I needed to find a place to cry. Somewhere to bury the grief of losing a love I could not have.
"Risa..."
Uttering weakly, Ai shook her head at Risa's retreating back. Why had things come to this? Their original intention was to ensure that all of the girls under their charge were free from troubles by spending time with them. They had wanted to become a confidante that their juniors could trust and talk to. But the decreased interaction with each other had caused the invisible rift to widen between them.
"Lin is like my sister. But you Risa, you are so much more than that."
-----
*sounds of tires screeching and crushing metal*
An extremely loud boom shattered the silence of the night and a ball of fiery orange flames erupted into the sky. Stopping in my tracks, I froze. An unexplainable sense of dread rose within me and I started to quake involuntarily.
Turn back, turn back now.I had no clue if my mind or heart was telling me this. Whichever it was, it made me run towards the location of the noise with extreme urgency. When I arrived at the site, I realized it was the same spot where I had left Ai.
"Ai-chan! Ai!"
Scanning the surroundings for her, a chill raced up my spine when I couldn't see her anywhere. A bloodied hand grabbed onto my sleeve and I gasped, afraid of what I might see. Thankfully that limp didn't belong to Ai, it was joined to a man who had vomit splashed across the front of his clothes.
"It wasn't my fault! She came out of nowhere."
My eyes widened at his words and I pushed the intoxicated man aside, sprinting like a mad person to the front of the totaled automobile. Trapped underneath the smashed bonnet of the car and between a utility pole, was my Ai.
"No..."
My hand shook when I reached out to touch her face. It isn't supposed to be like this. My beautiful Ai wasn't meant to be here, covered by bits of broken glass and grime. She should be on her way home, traveling comfortably in a warm and cozy taxi.
"Please open your eyes?"
I begged and cried, taking off my jacket to drape over her. When she didn't respond, I started to push hard on the mangled metal. But it was too heavy for me to move. There was no way I could release her from the wreck before help came.
"Ai, stay with me. The ambulance, it will be here soon. You'll be fine, you will be!"
I didn't dare to move her too much lest I aggravated her injuries but I wanted so much to hold her. Deciding that I had to be nearer so that she wouldn't feel frightened, I disregarded the pain from the shards cutting into my flesh as I laid down beside her, determined to keep her company.
"Yo--u..cam--e...ba--ck..."
Her eyes finally opened and she looked at me, her breathing growing more shallow as the seconds ticked past. Meeting her gaze, I took her hand and brought it to my chest.
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that petrol was leaking and sparks had formed from the electric cable wire that was dangling above the oil patch. While I was debating my next step, Ai spoke again.
"I'm sorry...l... have to go... first..."
Bringing my line of vision back to Ai, I realized that her eyes had closed. She appeared to be sleeping but I knew it wasn't the case. Squeezing on her hand tightly, I punched at the side of the car until there was a dent and my knuckles bled from the impact.
"I will never leave your side."
Whispering this in a gentle tone, I dipped my head low and pressed my mouth over Ai's. Concentrating on etching the pleasant taste of her lips in my memory forever, I blocked out the fierce crackling of the silver sparks as they ignited the pools of petrol splashed on the road.
Although you left before me, this isn't goodbye. Because the path I chose will make us meet again.-----
Hands up those of you who thought I would have Gaki killed when the car was coming towards her? Well, it's the same d***head of a driver who knocked Ai later. I guess fate works in strange ways? Don't ask me why he drove back in the same area later either. I can only say he was drunk that's why? Probably ended up driving in circles?
And yes, TakaGaki got hammied. But it isn't purely my fault this time. Apparently AA has a sadistic streak in her too. She insisted I kill off Ai?
So you readers know who to go after
Topic: More Than One Story...[111016 Loving You Forever] (Read 236733 times)