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Author Topic: Nanakusa (THE END?!)  (Read 48238 times)

Offline JFC

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 9 :: First Kiss)
« Reply #80 on: July 05, 2007, 02:35:57 PM »
Chapter 8 :: As the World Turns
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“First Gaki… and now this… I’m such a failure…”

“No you aren’t.”

Hitomi had her arms around Maki now, rubbing the younger woman’s back as soothingly as she possibly could.

“Don’t worry about it… I’m fine… it’s just a little leg wound…”
Maki just needs more practice at this. She can't expect to be perfect the first day, after all.


Quote
“What about Gaki-chan?”

Ai’s voice shot through their moment, and Hitomi gave the fifth gen girl a solemn look. The girl only became more persistant.

“What’s wrong with Gaki-chan?”
Uh-oh.  :O


Quote
Rika still hadn’t gone anywhere, but she stopped pulling, and had her chin on Hitomi’s shoulder.

“Hitomi-chan… you sound so grumpy! Maybe we need some closet time!”
Closet time? Sweeeeeeeeeeeet.  O0


Quote
By this time, Maki was composed enough to comfort Ai, who was in a hysterical fit, just thinking about her friend’s predicament. The elder woman looked over at the two and raised an eyebrow.

“What’s going on?” she asked. Rika was the first to chime in.

“Hitomi’s cheating on me with you.”

The look on Hitomi’s face was a mixture of anger, horror, and more anger, but Maki was far from amused.

“Oh?”
All of a sudden I get the feeling of being part of the audience for the Jerry Springer show. :P


Quote
Everything seemed to be pushed aside for a moment. Even the ignored Sayumi and Miyabi seemed to get what was going on, as they hid behind the couch and made sure they were out of the line of fire.
I'd say that's a smart move.


Quote
“Hitomi… what’s she talking about?” Maki asked. Staring over at the soloist, Hitomi kept from peeing her pants.

She went straight past the Miki glare, over Ai’s ‘You’d better as hell not be late’ aura, and right into something not even Hitomi could manage.

She went into jealous girlfriend mode.
Rika =  :gyaaah:
Yossi =  :sweat:
Maki =  :grr:
Aichan =  :frustrated: (about Risa)
Sayu & Miyabi =  :scared: :dunno:


Quote
“Oh for god’s sake… WOULD YOU LET ME EXPLAIN!?” Hitomi replied, “Here I am, sitting on the floor, bleeding out of my leg, and all you can do is yell at me for a relationship I don’t have?!”

There was a small silence. Rika went to say something, but decided against it. Maki stared incredulously at Hitomi.

“What do you mean… a relationship you don’t have? Are you saying Rika’s lying?”

“No… I told you, let me explain. It’s a lot more complicated than she makes it out to be…”

“Oh?”

“Well… okay sorda not… but I’m not cheating on anyone and I’ve only got eyes for you…”
Hmmmm...this is getting almost soap-opera-ish.

JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! :rockon:


Quote
There was a small silence, before Maki sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Brat.”

“Yes I am.”

“Fine. You can bleed to death then.”
Maki can't really mean that, can she? I mean, this is just her frustration at not having been able to heal her properly the first time, right?


Quote
At that moment, Rika launched over the couch and plopped down next to Hitomi, hand on her leg. After a few moments of Hitomi trying to tell her ‘no,’ Rika removed her hand and smiled.

“All better.”

Indeed, there was no leg wound. There wasn’t even a scar left behind. It was perfect.

Maki was furious.

“Do you mean you have healing powers too!? WHY DON’T YOU PEOPLE TELL ME THESE THINGS BEFORE!?”
EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH???  :OMG:


Quote
“Rika’s had more time to test her powers out… Now can we talk about this?”

Maki snorted, and looked away.

“No.”
Makes sense when you think about it. Maki must really hate being out of the loop like this. At this point she probably wishes that things could go back to the way they were before she found out that everyone (herself included) had these powers.


Quote
Rika was the first to finally speak up, as she innocently gave Maki the ‘Don’t hurt me I’m cute’ eyes and tried to talk to her.

“She really likes you, you know that right?”

...

“She’s stupid with her feelings. She can help anyone else and their feelings out no problem… but when it comes to her own emotions, she can’t do anything right. She was like that with everyone. It’s just the way she is…”
Seems to be that way for a lot of people. They can help other people with their problems, but for some reason, they're unable to do the same thing for themselves.  More often than not, they keep that little bit secret because they feel ashamed/embarrassed about it.


Quote
“Why’re you defending her if she cheated on you?”

“Because she didn’t. She wasn’t lying, It’s … it’s just the term I use… when I’m annoyed with her… because she doesn’t spend enough time with the people who’ll just sit and talk with her…”

“I’ll sit and talk with her…”

“I know that. She knows that, but she’s trying to develop something past just sitting and talking with you… I dunno, I guess it’s just me being my selfish self, but she was like that a lot. She tried with Aya and Miki, and they didn’t work out… Mako didn’t work out either, but Mako was afraid enough to get out of that relationship…”
Man, Rika needs to find a way to phrase her thoughts better. They can give people (like Maki) the wrong idea. :P

Ok, Mako I understand, Miki I understand...but Aya too? That came a bit out of left field (even though there have been a couple of other fics here before that experimented with the notion of a "MatsuYoshi" thing).  :O


Quote
“Was she ever with you?”

“Oh yeah. A long time ago. Before Mako, but after Aya. It was a long one… I graduated and she didn’t talk to me the same since… it was like we broke up there… So we didn’t like… formally break up, but we did just stop. Seeing each other like that I mean. I guess she was bitter at me for leaving the way I did.”
Yossi was probably just upset that Rika wouldn't be there so much and was just having a weird time dealing with it. It was probably easier for her (in a strange way) to just act as if they had never been together in the first place than go through an actual breakup.


Quote
“To be honest, I think it was good we broke up. She seemed happier after that… I don’t think I make a very good girlfriend… I’m too needy.”

“Wouldn’t that make you the perfect girlfriend?”

“Not for Hitomi-chan. Hitomi-chan’s needier.”
Heh, better not let Yossi hear you say that. :D


Quote
“… Are you going to talk to her before she leaves?”

“I don’t think so… I don’t think I’m ready for a relationship… not right now…”

“She might not come back…”

Maki raised her brow at the girl.

“What?”
Wait, what?  :?


Quote
“… A long time ago… like, right after you graduated… Kaorin got all weird on us… like… you know how she spaces out? Yeah… she’s supposed to be a… uhm.. seer. I think that’s what Hitomi-chan called it. She’s one of those. Anyways… after you graduated, Kaorin started rambling on about a prophecy or something… and how in the seventh year of the 21rst, the graduating leader was going to die. Or something like that. We all got paranoid… for about two minutes, because then Kaorin was like ‘ah hah, I’m just joking!’”
The seventh year of the 21st? If that's a reference to this year (2007 is the 7th year of the 21st century), then Yossi's gonna...

...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!  :frustrated:



Quote
The three had snuck away after Hitomi left, the awkwardness of the situation getting the best of them.
But they missed out on the juicy stuff. :hee:


Quote
“Not really sure. Haven’t had this much drama since the time Reina got caught with a boy.”
This a reference to those FRIDAY pics that were taken of her and her manager at the conbi store?


Quote
Ai snorted.

“Gaki’s in the hospital.”

The other two stared innocently at Ai as she stared back at them.

“And we’re gonna figure out who’s responsible.”
WOOO! Heroic payback-seeking Aichan is gonna fight for Risa's honour! :cool1:



Chapter 9 :: First Kiss
Quote
“Ayaya!” she said, happy, sicky sweet cheer in her voice, “How’re you doing?”

A hug, a smile, a small kiss on the cheek. Make the fanboys swoon and the fangirls giggle.
:nya:


Quote
“I never get to talk to you anymore Ayaya! I miss you so much…”

Aya wasn’t sure whether to take this as a joke or not… ever since the scandal blew this morning, she was furious with Miki.

But she couldn’t bring herself to say so.

“Miki… can we talk about this later? I have to … get to Tsunku…”
If I'm reading this right...it sounds like Aya and Miki aren't "together" in this universe.

WHY THE HELL ARE THEY NOT TOGETHER?!?!? WHY IS THERE NO GAM RABU-RABU!?!?!?  :mon whine:


Quote
I thought Maki was going to be different. She didn’t seem like the type to anger easily. She seemed more like the type to shrug off that I slept around a bit
The "sleeping around a bit" isn't exactly a smart/good thing to do if you're in a relationship (or trying to get into a relationship) with someone.


Quote
I liked cuddles.

She obviously didn’t. She was a cold-hearted ice queen, despite the fact that she was only looking out for my well being this morning.
Holy crap Yossi, did you ever think of trying to initiate the cuddles instead of waiting for someone else to?  :banghead:


Quote
After a few more shameful minutes of sobbing over a girl I never really got, I felt a cheek on my shoulder. Rika did that when she wanted to comfort me, or Kuwagata did that when she was depressed.

Not a lot of other people did it, unless they were Abe, wanting some attention or something stupid like that.

“Nee, why’re you so sad?”

My sobbing stopped, unable to place a name with the voice. I blinked, and glanced down.

Aya?

She hadn’t done that in ages.

“You’re never sad… Kabu-chan.”
EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~!!!
 :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

Aya's just there trying to be a good friend, right? Aya still really is all rabu-rabu for Miki-sama, right?  :mon cute:

Oh shit, anyone wanna bet that Maki's gonna walk by right now, looking for Yossi and she's gonna see this scene? She'll FLIP!!!  :dizzy:

JPH!P :heart:'s kuro808, Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline Kreuz_Asakura

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 9 :: First Kiss)
« Reply #81 on: July 05, 2007, 05:55:29 PM »
Quote
After a few more shameful minutes of sobbing over a girl I never really got, I felt a cheek on my shoulder. Rika did that when she wanted to comfort me, or Kuwagata did that when she was depressed.

Not a lot of other people did it, unless they were Abe, wanting some attention or something stupid like that.

“Nee, why’re you so sad?”

My sobbing stopped, unable to place a name with the voice. I blinked, and glanced down.

Aya?

She hadn’t done that in ages.

“You’re never sad… Kabu-chan.”
EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~!!!
 :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

Aya's just there trying to be a good friend, right? Aya still really is all rabu-rabu for Miki-sama, right?  :mon cute:

Oh shit, anyone wanna bet that Maki's gonna walk by right now, looking for Yossi and she's gonna see this scene? She'll FLIP!!!  :dizzy:

I was thinking the same too...and it would be more interesting if Miki come with her...  :shocked:

Offline whytphyre

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 9 :: First Kiss)
« Reply #82 on: July 08, 2007, 02:52:48 PM »
No, no chapter yet. I wanna reply to the comments. Ya'll are too much sometime.

I do have Chapter 10 in my notebook though. Or at least half of it. You'll get to see more develop between Aya and Yossi, and you'll see why they're like that.

However... I must say, I didn't expect this response... the GAM love thing yeah... (I'm personally not a fan myself, and I don't write a lot of things that I'm not a fan of... so if you see it it's 'cause I figured 'why not'.) the AyaYossi thing however... I thought they were more common. My bad ^^

But that's a more important part of the story there.

Anyways... There's a few pairings wandering and ricocheting about... and if my spoiler rantee can't spot them (Dear FIM-chan) then I guess I'll either keep you in suspense or hope you all saw it from the beginning.

Whatever the case, Maki's not going to catch Yossie and Aya, there will be a kiss, and there will be more Jerry Springer like drama.

When I get to it.

Offline whytphyre

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 10 :: Game Plan)
« Reply #83 on: July 16, 2007, 05:12:07 AM »
So I figured it out. It seems a wee lame now, but I didn't wanna explain too much without killing the whole story. There'll be a prequel on Hitomi and Aya's relationship... it'll explain this a lot more.

Chapter 10 :: Game Plan

“There’s no strawberry pocky?”

This seemed to puzzle Eri as she stood behind the counter, eyeing the cashier as nervously as he was her. Behind her, was a police officer, stationed next to the register counter, keeping a watchful eye on them both.

“Did they run out of flavoring at the factory?”

“No, someone came in and bought it all Kamei-san.”

Another puzzling thought.

“Aww… alright.”

Now Junjun wouldn’t be able to taste anything good in life. All the good pocky was gone.

“Gomen Kamei-san!”

“It’s not your fault.”

Eri grinned at the man, but went back to where Junjun was, eyeing the other kinds of pocky she could get lost in.

“No strawberry,” Eri said, rather dejectly. Her older friend shrugged, then grinned and waved cheerily at the police man. He curtly nodded, and added a rather tight smile in her direction.

“Kawaii!”

At this, Eri let out a noise, and smacked a hand over Junjun’s mouth.

“Don’t say things like that!” she hissed, “FRIDAY could be anywhere!”

Junjun stared at her friend, shrugged, and nodded, before picking up some green tea pocky.

Eri removed her hand and sighed.

“Junjun, I swear….”

“Don’t do that! That is bad for public image!”

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
“What did you do to her?”

“Such an angry question Kabu-chan.”

Hitomi had her hands on Aya’s shoulders, and was giving her a rather pissed off glare.

Aya just grinned right back.

“Saki, give her back.”

“I don’t get an innocent, ‘I missed you’? Kabu-chan, I’m hurt.”

“Go to hell.”

The smile was quickly wiped from the younger woman’s lips, and replaced with a vile glare.

“That was uncalled for. You didn’t get that earlier, and you aren’t getting it now.”

Hitomi snorted.

“I guess that’s expected though,” Saki continued, “Ever since I took it all away from you, you’ve been all grumpy to me and Momo…”

“Just you. Aya didn’t do anything wrong…”

“Momo still loves you you know…”

The awkward silence that followed provoked a response somewhere within Aya’s conflicting minds, and soon enough, Hitomi soon found a pair of lips colliding with her own.

She froze, unsure of what to do. Part of her wanted to humor the woman in front of her, and do whatever it was she wanted.

That was her lonely, desperate side talking.

A bigger part of her, her ‘save my life damnit’ side, overpowered her first side, and pulled away from the kiss and held the other woman at arm’s length.

There was no devious grin on the younger woman’s face. Instead, there were tears, and a look of sad pain.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I never blamed you for any of it, Aya-chan…”

Hitomi smiled weakly, and gave Aya a small nudge on the cheek.

“Now toughen up. No one likes wimp idols…”

Aya nodded.

“Can you… stop her?”

“No… there’s only two people who can… and you know it…”

“But…”

“I know… we’ll do what we can, alright?”

“… Okay…”

There was an awkward silence.

“You like Gocchin, right?”

It wasn’t an Aya question, but it was out there, for the world to hear.

“How…”

“There was a picture on your nightstand… ya know… when Saki snuck in and everything…”

There was a small grin on Aya’s face, but it left as soon as it met Hitomi’s stern ‘excuse me?!’ glare.

“Uhm… yeah… well, that was why she got all … sadistic… but… uhm…”

“Yes, I do.”

Aya gave Hitomi an innocent look.

“Really? Like, you mean it this time? You aren’t gonna hurt her?”

Once more, a pause.

“… I don't know… but it’s different this time…”

“If you say so… Kabu-chan…”

The grin returned. Hitomi stared, and went right back to anger.

“GIVE HER BACK!”

“You’ll just have to make me… Or are you too wimpy to do that too? Kill her off… just to get me out of the way…”

“… She doesn’t deserve to be treated like this…”

“No… no, you do. You know it. Why not just take it from her then? Or are you too chicken to do that?”

And before Hitomi could say anything else.

“You gonna tell me to go to hell again? Go ahead. What good is it gonna do?”

Offline rndmnwierd

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 10 :: Game Plan)
« Reply #84 on: July 16, 2007, 02:33:46 PM »
Saki and Momo? Why those names? There are already enough Saki's around to be confusing!

Offline stefy

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 10 :: Game Plan)
« Reply #85 on: July 16, 2007, 03:17:00 PM »
Is this Saki like.. possessing Aya? Or Does Aya have like a split personality?

Awww Aya kissed Yossi!.. I don't know why but I have a soft spot for this duo, even tho their not close in real life. But then I hope Yossi and Maki would work things out soon..

Finally~... NICE FIC!

Offline inDeceit

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 10 :: Game Plan)
« Reply #86 on: July 16, 2007, 03:48:22 PM »
Or it's a codename  :shocked: like in sukeban  :-X
... but I'm getting confused with the antagonists..

No matter! Great fic. I loved them Eri & JunJun scenes :D
and I agree with Eri on strawberry pocky  :cry:
Quote
Now Junjun wouldn’t be able to taste anything good in life. All the good pocky was gone.

Offline whytphyre

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 10 :: Game Plan)
« Reply #87 on: July 16, 2007, 10:12:48 PM »
Sukeban Deka for Saki... because that was just too good to pass up.

And Momo to confuse the crap out of you all ^^ Split personalities... rule.

Offline JFC

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 10 :: Game Plan)
« Reply #88 on: July 17, 2007, 06:02:19 AM »
Quote
“There’s no strawberry pocky?”

...

“Did they run out of flavoring at the factory?”

“No, someone came in and bought it all Kamei-san.”
Aw crap. :(



Quote
Eri grinned at the man, but went back to where Junjun was, eyeing the other kinds of pocky she could get lost in.

“No strawberry,” Eri said, rather dejectly. Her older friend shrugged, then grinned and waved cheerily at the police man. He curtly nodded, and added a rather tight smile in her direction.

“Kawaii!”

At this, Eri let out a noise, and smacked a hand over Junjun’s mouth.

“Don’t say things like that!” she hissed, “FRIDAY could be anywhere!”

Junjun stared at her friend, shrugged, and nodded, before picking up some green tea pocky.
I guess UFA must have forgotten to teach Junjun & Linlin about not getting FRIDAY'd yet, huh? :P


Quote
“Junjun, I swear….”

“Don’t do that! That is bad for public image!”
Awwwwww...Junjun! :lol:


Quote
“What did you do to her?”

“Such an angry question Kabu-chan.”

Hitomi had her hands on Aya’s shoulders, and was giving her a rather pissed off glare.

Aya just grinned right back.

“Saki, give her back.”

“I don’t get an innocent, ‘I missed you’? Kabu-chan, I’m hurt.”
This isn't really Aya, is it? It's Captain, and somehow she must have the ability to possess other peoples bodies. :o

Fuck, NOW it makes a lot more sense why Sayu was so concerned/scared for Yossi's safety earlier in the story. It could be that it WAS Sayu that attacked her, but it wasn't REALLY Sayu, it was Captain controlling/possessing Sayu's body.  This must mean that either Sayu has some latent ESP talents of her own, or a person who's possessed by Captain still retains a faint impression of being possessed.


Quote
“I guess that’s expected though,” Saki continued, “Ever since I took it all away from you, you’ve been all grumpy to me and Momo…”

“Just you. Aya didn’t do anything wrong…”

“Momo still loves you you know…”
So does this mean that the previous relationship between Yossi and Aya that Rika mentioned was never really between Yossi and Aya? That it was always Captain (and Momo-chan) that were secretly in control of Aya during that time? :dunno:


Quote
There was no devious grin on the younger woman’s face. Instead, there were tears, and a look of sad pain.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I never blamed you for any of it, Aya-chan…”

...

“You like Gocchin, right?”

It wasn’t an Aya question, but it was out there, for the world to hear.

“How…”

“There was a picture on your nightstand… ya know… when Saki snuck in and everything…”
Does Aya mean when Yossi was attacked? That would mean that it was Aya who actually physically attacked her, and Aya was somehow aware, but powerless to do anything about it! :OMG:


Quote
“Can you… stop her?”

“No… there’s only two people who can… and you know it…”
Captain must be really skilled/good with her powers. Considering how young she is, it probably came very easily and/or naturally to her. To beat her would require someone even more skilled and powerful. Aya mentions two people, but who would those two people be?


Quote
“If you say so… Kabu-chan…”

The grin returned. Hitomi stared, and went right back to anger.

“GIVE HER BACK!”

“You’ll just have to make me… Or are you too wimpy to do that too? Kill her off… just to get me out of the way…”
So it would appear that one way to stop Captain is to kill off the host body that she's possessing. This is, of course, NOT an option under any circumstances for Yossi. Aya's just an innocent pawn here.  Captain probably chose her because she knew that Yossi wouldn't be willing to hurt/kill her.

JPH!P :heart:'s kuro808, Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline whytphyre

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 11 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 1)
« Reply #89 on: July 21, 2007, 06:07:57 AM »
I <3 speculations sometimes.

JFC, sweetie, it's a split personality. It isn't the Berryz, though it's a good idea.

And, before ANYONE READS ANY FURTHER! ::

Yes I did. I did go there. I had to. The irony of the whole situation was just TOO much to pass up. I almost cried when I wrote this chapter it was that bad. But I hope you all enjoy reading some of it...

I promise, to make up for it, you'll get some fluff... I promise!


Chapter 11 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 1

“Koha-chan?”

The look on her face was less than exciting, unless one was a psychiatrist. It was a slightly sadistic look, with a smirk and a glint in her eye.

And Reina was far from pleased.

“Koharu-chan… what… just happened?”

“Deus ex Machina.”

Reina stared at her a moment, blinked, stared again, and opened her mouth a few times before continuing her staring.

“Huh?”

“… Tsunku-sama told me it meant ‘God out of the Machine’ in Latin…”

“… Okay, that doesn’t help me either.”

“It fixes broken problems.”

“More specific.”

“I don’t like yo-yo’s. I have to get rid of the yo-yo so I can be happy.”

“And my hand can fall off.”

“That’s just a part of Deus ex Machina I’ll have to come to terms with.”

Koharu sounded more serious than any of Reina’s senpai members, and she was beginning to think that the girl was crazy or something.

“I don’t do it all the time. I barely do it at all… and sometimes… I try to help… but it never works out, something has to give somewhere…”

“So you have to use these powers?”

“Every now and then. Tsunku-sama said it was good for my overall health.”

What was that supposed to mean?

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“… It means that… well… it means if I don’t use them, I explode.”

Reina’s eyes grew a few sizes, before blinking, yet again.

“It’s… another side effect,” Koharu explained, in a sad and dismayed tone.

“… I can tell…”

“But… if you want me to use them for you… I can see if I can get Sayu-chan to notice you more…”

There was a pause, and an awkward silence, before Koharu closed her eyes, deep in concentration. Reina let out a noise.

“Koharu-chan, whatever it is don’t do it!”

Koharu opened her eyes again.

“I… I didn’t say I was ever interested in Sayumin…”

Now the innocent look was back, and the younger member stared up at Reina.

“… But you didn’t have to. You’re too nervous… to go near her, and so that’s why you two don’t spend all that much time together… and you let Kamei-san do all the talking when it’s you three alone in a room…”

Reina paused, unsure of how to respond. Koharu continued.

“She looks at you all the time.”

Reina blushed.

“WHA?!”

“She does… and she told me you were cute… and… she said she wanted to finally tell you about it this morning… but I haven’t seen her since last night…”

Reina really didn’t know what to say to this girl. She was just told that the girl she was fawning over was fawning over her, and finally got the guts to tell her about it.

“She went over to Yossie’s house last night… to talk to Yossie about it… because apparently she gives better love advice than I do or something.”

That was a laugh.

Wait.

“Yossie?! You mean…”

It began to click. The phone conversation, Miki’s freaked out reaction to the phone call… the whole reason they were there in the first place.

Reina wasn’t sure whether her heart was breaking in two or it was just confusedly running around like a little chibi in her chest.

“… Oh god…”

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

“I have to get away from you!”

She was already halfway out the door when she found that Saki was following her. She was still fleeing as she was doing so.

“But Kabu-chan…”

“NO! I told you to get away!”

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

“Why are we leaving the building?”

Rika was following Maki, who was making her way down a flight of stairs, and out the door.

“Because Yocchan was lying when she said she was going to talk to Tsunku… I could just see it in her eyes. She went somewhere else… and I know she’s leaving now. You know she is too, I know you do.”

“It… is how she is… but can’t you call her?”

“No. You know better than that too.”

This was also true. Hitomi was not the type of person to pick up her phone unless it was an emergency.

“Aren’t you important enough to her?”

There was a point where Maki thought about it, but then thought against it just as fast.

“No. I want to talk to her about it in person. I want to make sure I misunderstand the right things, and understand the wrong things. That way we can fight over it and make out later.”

Rika let out a small chirp of a laugh, but then stopped, unsure of whether to take it as a joke or not.

As they both reached downstairs, they saw Aya, staring at the entrance.

“Awww, Kabu-chan got all grumpy… Oh! Friends…”

However, before Aya could do more than stare at Maki and Rika wrong, a pair of arms made themselves around her midsection.

“Ayaya, why’re you back here again?”

Miki’s voice startled the three of them, mainly because she sounded a little more on the side of Sayumi at that point.

“Get off, you brat.”

At the sound of Aya’s scathing voice, Miki pulled away, surprised, unsure of how to react. It was strange hearing her so grumpy, and quite hurtful.

Then an expression of realization crossed her eyes.

“Oh. Saki… wanna give Aya back?”

“Bitch… no.”

“Fine. I’ll just have to go and hit on Yossie or something… ‘cause clearly this isn’t getting me any-“

“YOU!”

Now Maki reacted. Well, it was more of Maki’s inner voice reacting through Rika.

“NO! Get away from Yossie! She’s Maki’s now!”

Blush was written all over Maki’s cheeks. Miki, on the other hand, shrugged, and lightly made her way over to Rika, an evil glint in her eyes.

“… Fine… wanna make out?”

“God, you’re so perverted!”

“God, I’m so confused…” Maki muttered, making her way past the three, and out the door.

There she was, in her red haired glory, staring at her phone, as if trying to make some strange decision.

“Damnit. Why can’t I get any courage around girls I actually like?!” she shouted, practically to the world. Maki blushed some more. It was a quite flattering moment, and it would have been even more flattering if Hitomi saw her.

“Yocchan?”

Whirling around, Hitomi stared at Maki for a good few moments, before a blush became apparent on her face, and her free hand clenched into a nervous fist.

Maki resisted the urge to squeal like a fangirl.

“Yocchan… if you… wanted to talk…”

The blush disappeared from Hitomi’s features, and she shook her head.

“No. I was gonna just… call and say goodbye.”

“What?”

“… Uhm… look. Maybe… it’d be easier… if we just didn’t do this… clearly… you’re the jealous type… and I’m… like… not any better…”

“Excuse me? Jealous type?”

“You’re even quick to anger, see?”

“Oh, like you’re one to talk. If I were to march right back in there and make out with Rika, you’d say something about it.”

“Yeah, I’d ask to join before I got jealous… ‘cause you’d have to say no and then I’d get all angry that you’re not sharing fun…”

“Yocchan!”

“… Sorry, that’s… uhm, insensitive me talking.”

“What the hell. Miki calls Aya Saki, I have healing powers that apparently Rika has too… and now you’re sitting here telling me you have split personalities?! When’s this confusion gonna end Yocchan!? WHEN!?”

Hitomi stepped back, onto the street. It seemed pretty safe when she looked behind her.

“Uhm… you’ll figure it out, alright? You’re smart…”

Maki’s initial anger faded, and was replaced with something quite similar to annoyance.

That and the sudden realization that Hitomi looked bothered by something.

“Yocchan… I wanna help you through this…”

Hitomi took another step back.

“… I know. I just wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if you got hurt.”

There was a warm smile, one that Maki had never seen before out of her long-time best friend.

It was very short lived, as a dark purple car sped through, stopping only when it violently bumped into the elder red head, before speeding off again, leaving a rather awkward silence in its wake.

“… Yocchan?”

Offline JFC

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 11 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 1)
« Reply #90 on: July 21, 2007, 05:06:25 PM »
Quote
JFC, sweetie, it's a split personality. It isn't the Berryz, though it's a good idea.
Wait, so Aya's a schizo? Captain's not controlling her in some psychic manner? That must mean that "Saki" is actually NOT Captain, but just the name given to Aya's "other" personality, right?

...

Great, just great.  Couldn't you have just picked a name that no one in H!P had yet? It would have saved me a WHOLE lot of confusion.  :bleed eyes:


Quote
I promise, to make up for it, you'll get some fluff... I promise!
It better be damn good fluff too. :(



Quote
“Koharu-chan… what… just happened?”

“Deus ex Machina.”

...

“It fixes broken problems.”

“More specific.”

“I don’t like yo-yo’s. I have to get rid of the yo-yo so I can be happy.”
Ah, the tried and true device for the writer who's run out of devices to use. :lol:  Gotta love it.



Quote
“I don’t like yo-yo’s. I have to get rid of the yo-yo so I can be happy.”

“And my hand can fall off.”

“That’s just a part of Deus ex Machina I’ll have to come to terms with.”
Getting rid of the yo-yo I can understand, but did she have to burn it? :? Couldn't she have just made it go "up and *poof*" or something?


Quote
“I don’t do it all the time. I barely do it at all… and sometimes… I try to help… but it never works out, something has to give somewhere…”

“So you have to use these powers?”

“Every now and then. Tsunku-sama said it was good for my overall health.”

What was that supposed to mean?

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“… It means that… well… it means if I don’t use them, I explode.”

Reina’s eyes grew a few sizes, before blinking, yet again.

“It’s… another side effect,” Koharu explained, in a sad and dismayed tone.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! :OMG:
If she doesn't use her powers periodically, she'll explode?!?!!? Couldn't she, I dunno, just use them to make herself an ice cream sundae or something?


Quote
“But… if you want me to use them for you… I can see if I can get Sayu-chan to notice you more…”

There was a pause, and an awkward silence, before Koharu closed her eyes, deep in concentration. Reina let out a noise.
Sayu? Where'd this come from?


Quote
“I… I didn’t say I was ever interested in Sayumin…”

Now the innocent look was back, and the younger member stared up at Reina.

“… But you didn’t have to. You’re too nervous… to go near her, and so that’s why you two don’t spend all that much time together… and you let Kamei-san do all the talking when it’s you three alone in a room…”
Koharu probably just knew this by plain observation. No need for powers here.

And AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW Reina likes Sayu! :hee:


Quote
Koharu continued.

“She looks at you all the time.”

Reina blushed.

“WHA?!”

“She does… and she told me you were cute… and… she said she wanted to finally tell you about it this morning… but I haven’t seen her since last night…”

Reina really didn’t know what to say to this girl. She was just told that the girl she was fawning over was fawning over her, and finally got the guts to tell her about it.
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!  :luvluv2:


Quote
“She went over to Yossie’s house last night… to talk to Yossie about it… because apparently she gives better love advice than I do or something.”
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...love advice from 20 year-old Yossi VS love advice from 15 year-old Koharu.
* JFC raises both hands up, and starts alternately moving them up and down as if weighing something.


Yeah, no contest. :P  Yossi all the way.


Quote
“Yossie?! You mean…”

It began to click. The phone conversation, Miki’s freaked out reaction to the phone call… the whole reason they were there in the first place.

Reina wasn’t sure whether her heart was breaking in two or it was just confusedly running around like a little chibi in her chest.

“… Oh god…”
Something's wrong with Sayu! :scared:


Quote
“I have to get away from you!”

She was already halfway out the door when she found that Saki was following her. She was still fleeing as she was doing so.

“But Kabu-chan…”

“NO! I told you to get away!”
Damn, it's like a whole "Fatal Attraction" thing goin' on up in here! :O


Quote
“It… is how she is… but can’t you call her?”

...

“No. I want to talk to her about it in person. I want to make sure I misunderstand the right things, and understand the wrong things. That way we can fight over it and make out later.”
Hmmm...makes sense. Best part of the argument is the "making up" part. :D


Quote
“Ayaya, why’re you back here again?”

...

“Get off, you brat.”

...

“Oh. Saki… wanna give Aya back?”

“Bitch… no.”

“Fine. I’ll just have to go and hit on Yossie or something… ‘cause clearly this isn’t getting me any-“
What the...Miki KNOWS about Saki???  :shocked: Why the hell didn't she do something before?!? Didn't she know how obsessive Saki was getting over Yossi? Besides, having Saki must be really annoying, as when she's there, it means Miki gets less Aya-time. :cry:


Quote
“NO! Get away from Yossie! She’s Maki’s now!”
Awwwwwwwwwww...Rika's fighting on Maki's behalf. :oops:



Quote
Blush was written all over Maki’s cheeks. Miki, on the other hand, shrugged, and lightly made her way over to Rika, an evil glint in her eyes.

“… Fine… wanna make out?”

“God, you’re so perverted!”
And that's why we love Miki!  :pimp:


Quote
There she was, in her red haired glory, staring at her phone, as if trying to make some strange decision.

“Damnit. Why can’t I get any courage around girls I actually like?!” she shouted, practically to the world. Maki blushed some more. It was a quite flattering moment, and it would have been even more flattering if Hitomi saw her.
Oh, Maki spotted Yossi admitting that she likes her! :w00t:

Quote
“Yocchan?”

Whirling around, Hitomi stared at Maki for a good few moments, before a blush became apparent on her face, and her free hand clenched into a nervous fist.

Maki resisted the urge to squeal like a fangirl.
DO IT! SQUEAL LIKE A FANGIRL!!! :wriggly:


Quote
“Yocchan… if you… wanted to talk…”

The blush disappeared from Hitomi’s features, and she shook her head.

“No. I was gonna just… call and say goodbye.”

“What?”

“… Uhm… look. Maybe… it’d be easier… if we just didn’t do this… clearly… you’re the jealous type… and I’m… like… not any better…”
WTF.... :dizzy:


Quote
“What the hell. Miki calls Aya Saki, I have healing powers that apparently Rika has too… and now you’re sitting here telling me you have split personalities?! When’s this confusion gonna end Yocchan!? WHEN!?”
And now YOSSI has split personalities too!  :err:

Ugh, I wanna give up.


Quote
“Yocchan… I wanna help you through this…”

Hitomi took another step back.

“… I know. I just wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if you got hurt.”

There was a warm smile, one that Maki had never seen before out of her long-time best friend.

It was very short lived, as a dark purple car sped through, stopping only when it violently bumped into the elder red head, before speeding off again, leaving a rather awkward silence in its wake.

“… Yocchan?”
Oh shit...the prophecy!

:imdead:

JPH!P :heart:'s kuro808, Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline glcorps2002

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 11 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 1)
« Reply #91 on: July 21, 2007, 05:46:48 PM »
You know, technically you can be clinically dead(heart stops beating for a bit) and be brought back to life with modern medical science or good old fashioned CPR. That would keep the prophecy true and it would have effected it's target.

Offline inDeceit

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 11 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 1)
« Reply #92 on: July 21, 2007, 05:58:25 PM »
Ooh..now I know. Funny how Miki handles Aya's other self.

ReinaSayu? Now there's something I don't see everyday.

 :scared: Yossie!!! Felt like she did it on purpose to push Maki into making full use of her healing powers. I really have to reread the whole fic since 'Prophecy' kinda fled my memory.

Damn cliffhanger.

Offline rndmnwierd

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 11 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 1)
« Reply #93 on: July 22, 2007, 01:55:26 AM »
Quote
It was very short lived, as a dark purple car sped through, stopping only when it violently bumped into the elder red head, before speeding off again, leaving a rather awkward silence in its wake.

“… Yocchan?”

 :banghead:

Offline whytphyre

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 12 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 2)
« Reply #94 on: July 23, 2007, 05:51:02 AM »
So that was half to freak you all out and half to advance in plot... but yeah. This chapter's pretty much monopolized. Cute, heartwarming fluff here... next chapter we get back to the action. Ai-chan needs to go bust some ass.

Chapter 12 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 2

What happened?

Okay, beyond the ‘I just messed up with a sexy woman’ thing. The last thing I remember is seeing her starting to smile back at me. It was adorable… or it would have been, if I could remember anything else before this darkness.

“Yocchan!”

Who was that? Whatever, it doesn’t matter. I need to think.

What happened last?

Oh, right. That prophecy thing. Kaorin always wanted to talk to me after my graduation, as if she was spooked about something.

But still, why now? Why not like two years ago, when I wasn’t fawning over Gocchin?

“Yocchan!”

Shut up!

Pain. Ow. Something hurts. I don’t know what it is, but it hurts. Oh, everything hurts. It doesn’t matter. It’ll stop soon. This is all just some bad dream or something.

What was it that Kaorin said? The leader who graduates in the 7th of the 21rst or some such nonsense. Whatever. Never believed in strange prophecies like that.

But… Gocchin. I can’t leave her hanging. I couldn’t. That was why I was distancing myself, so she didn’t have to ever worry about it again.

”Yocchan! You can’t die on me!”

I’m not gonna, now if you would wait three more seconds!

Wait, something tasted funny. A little on the salty side actually. I don’t remember being in the ocean.

Oh. Tears. Right. Or was that blood? It tasted a little on the funny, metallic side too…

Wait.

Was I dying?

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

“Yocchan! Don’t die!”

There was a lifeless body in her arms, and tears flowing from her cheeks.

“Yocchan… please… say something…”

She let out a sob, as Rika and Miki stood on the sidewalk, the former with her jaw dropped.

The latter with a phone in her hand.

“Moshimoshi! Ah! Hai, it’s Miki… yeah, just wanted to call and tell you to make sure the rest of clan Yoshizawa’s safe inside, and away from the streets… yeah, it seems that there’s a natural attraction for you people and cars.”

There was a pause, and Rika let out all hell on Miki, while the person on the other end, probably someone related to Hitomi, did the same.

Maki paid no heed.

“Yocchan… I’m here for you… okay? I… I know you don't want me to get hurt or whatever… but… I’m here. I wanna help. You might be slightly stupid in the head… but ya know what? I don’t care. I… I love you…”

“… wanna… get… off…”

Maki stared down at what used to be a dead corpse, or what she thought was one. No coherent sentences, and her thoughts went right back to the zombies that she thought about earlier.

“… Ribs… ow… OW!”

Letting out a noise, Maki paused, unsure of what to do.

“OW. REST OF BODY OW!”

Another noise, followed by Hitomi moving around in Maki’s arms.

“Owwww… OOOOWWWW! Oh god! Ow!”

Maki blinked down at her. She didn’t seem to be horridly in pain. She was bleeding in a few places, but if she was still on the brink of death, there would have been quieter noises, and less moving.

Oh, healing powers. Duh.

“… Yocchan, I heard you the first time.”

“Ow! Ooooww-… oh… wanna kiss me, make it better?”

“… What happened to ‘going it alone’?”

“Oh fine, don’t be here for me…”

“Brat…”

“Yes, I am.”

The sound of sirens snapped them both out of the looks they gave each other, Hitomi’s was more of a suave ‘You know you want some of this,’ and Maki’s was a look of pure anger.

“We should get out of the street.”

It was a neutral statement that came out of Hitomi’s mouth, but Maki wasn’t sure to follow it.

“If you get run over by a car, no one’ll be around to heal you.”

“Rika will.”

“She’s a mimic. You die, there’s nothing to mimic…”

Back to the not making sense again! At least things seemed to be in order.

“… That was your car… I think…” Maki finally blurted. Brow raised, Hitomi gave her a look.

“What do you mean… ‘that was your car.’ And before you say anything else… remember, no one wants to steal my hideous death trap of a machine, remember?”

It was true. Once Hitomi got her license, Yuko and Natsumi took her out car shopping, and they finally settled on an inexpensive car that looked relatively shiny and relatively safe.

That was a few years ago.

“… Maybe we should get off the street…”

“No no, I wanna know how you know that’s my car…”

“Yocchan…”

“Fine, mom. Fine.”

They stared at each other for a few moments more, before Maki slowly helped Hitomi up. It seemed there were still some bruises and sprains, but they were slowly healing.

The main threat was the part that shook them both the most.

Neither of them said it right out, as they finally settled on the sidewalk, but they both knew the other was thinking about it. An ambulance sped by, completely missing the scene of the accident, but it didn’t seem too concerned.

The victim was mostly better now.

“Sorry,” Hitomi finally said, paying no heed to the scene of Miki and Rika arguing at each other behind them.

“For what?” Maki asked, giving Hitomi a strange look.

“Scaring you. I did that a lot today, didn’t I?”

“Yes, you did.”

“So what’d happen if I told you that I was a guy?”

“I’d kill you and never heal you again.”

“You don’t mean that… You said you loved me…”

“Tough love knows no bounds Yocchan.”

Hitomi grinned, but didn’t do much else. No kissing, no hugs, no corny ‘I love you back’ statements.

Just a grin.

“Yocchan… you gonna be alright?”

“Of course I am. You know me better than that. I’m tough! I’ll bounce back from anything!”

“There’s a snake next to you.”

“OHMIGOD WHERE?!”

She let out a noise, and clung to Maki, before realizing that the younger was laughing at her own joke. Hitomi snorted.

“Not funny.”

“Yes it was… it was hilarious…”

Maki let out another laugh before smiling over at Hitomi, who went solemn again. She was fiddling with her black cellphone, which was adorned with cute soccer balls and a little beetle sticker.

Inside jokes always escaped Maki.

“It’s broken. I think whatever bumped into me must’ve killed the phone too. No one’ll be able to get a hold of me…”

Maki nodded.

“Mine works fine. We’ll be alright.”

The elder woman shook her head.

“I have to do this one on my own.”

Despite the fact that there was an argument (now on why Reina got the lead Shabondama part) behind them, Maki didn’t find it fit to yell at her friend.

It seemed like something Hitomi had to do.

“Will you come back?”

Hitomi shrugged.

“I hope so. My plan is to stay alive… I’ve been lucky so far… but I can’t always depend on you…”

She smiled lightly, before eyeing Maki, a bit on the nervous side.

“No matter how much I might love you back.”

Maki smiled back, and the two shared a moment that one of them would later gag over how uncool it was to do it in public.

They were in a city after all, and, despite the fact that no one was smart enough to call 911, there was a large number of bystanders watching the scene, until they were sure no one was bleeding.

Guess the whole ‘getting up from being hit by a car’ thing must not have spooked city folk anymore. They probably thought it was a publicity stunt.

Nonetheless, both Hitomi and Maki had their egos, and their reputations to look after.

“So… you’ll try?”

“Best I can… they don’t call me Mr. Moonlight for nutin’…”

“They still call you that?”

“Yes.”

It ended their small, light hearted banter, and Hitomi stood up.

“Maki… I mean it…”

She smiled down at the other woman, stuffing one of her hands into her pockets, and fiddling around with her cell phone a moment.

“I’ll come back… or I’ll die trying.”

After a moment, she plopped the black device in Maki’s lap.

“That’s reassurance.”

Pulling her hand out of her pocket, she showed Maki a slightly battered friendship bracelet, much like the one the younger woman used to wear, shortly before her own graduation from Morning Musume.

“And this is luck.”

They grinned at each other for a moment, before Hitomi looked back at the two, who were still fighting, and now causing a mass of people to collect around them. She sighed.

“Those two will never learn. OI!”

The two stopped, and stared at Hitomi, who looked rather sternly at the both of them.

“If you two are gonna fight, do it inside, where no one who gets off from this sort of thing can gawk at you. Otherwise, just don’t, okay? You’re gonna give us a worse reputation than Kutagawa can do on her own.”

Hitomi let out a snort, and glanced back over at Maki.

“I think you’ll be entertained by them, even if I don’t come back…”

Maki didn’t smile back at this.

“… Fine. Be that way. Seriously though, don’t wait up for me. Live life. Don’t mope around… ‘cause I really might not come back.”

“You’re dead set on that, aren’t you?”

There was a small silence between them.

“No. I don’t want to be… I’m just being a pessimist. Kaorin’s never been proven wrong before…”

“I thought you didn’t know.”

There was another small silence.

“… She told me a few minutes before I tried going to Tsunku… I’m kinda spooked by the whole thing. I really don’t want to die…”

Maki had never seen this side of Hitomi before, so it was natural for concern to spread across her features.

“I’m allowed to be afraid of something other than snakes.”

“Yeah… but…”

“No one else hears of it. Just you, and Miki… and Rika, who’re totally paying attention now.”

They grinned again.

“… Now before this turns into some strange, corny moment, I’m gonna go…” Hitomi said lightly, “… And watch yourself… someone finds out that we’re fawning over each other, and FRIDAY’s sure to follow.”

“… I don’t care.”

“Good. Neither do I.”

Hitomi smiled again, before leaning over and giving Maki a small kiss on the forehead.

“I’ll be back. This time I promise.”

Without another word, Hitomi winked, and slowly walked off into the crowd. Rika and Miki watched her do so, before Miki glanced over at Maki.

“So no naked closet time for you, huh Gocchin?”

Offline JFC

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 12 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 2)
« Reply #95 on: July 24, 2007, 07:04:04 AM »
Quote
Oh, right. That prophecy thing. Kaorin always wanted to talk to me after my graduation, as if she was spooked about something.
Kaori was likely worried (and must have somehow knew) that Yossi would have been the one that the prophecy referred to.


Quote
What was it that Kaorin said? The leader who graduates in the 7th of the 21rst or some such nonsense. Whatever. Never believed in strange prophecies like that.

But… Gocchin. I can’t leave her hanging. I couldn’t. That was why I was distancing myself, so she didn’t have to ever worry about it again.
Yossi sort of contradicts herself here. She says she doesn't believe in prophecies, yet she just admitted to pushing Maki away so that she would get hurt. If Yossi really didn't believe in that prophecy she wouldn't have been worried about Maki getting hurt like that.


Quote
Was I dying?
Not if Maki can remember what she's capable of. :mon cute:


Quote
Rika and Miki stood on the sidewalk, the former with her jaw dropped.

The latter with a phone in her hand.

“Moshimoshi! Ah! Hai, it’s Miki… yeah, just wanted to call and tell you to make sure the rest of clan Yoshizawa’s safe inside, and away from the streets… yeah, it seems that there’s a natural attraction for you people and cars.”
A safe precaution, if for no other reason than to keep the girls from seeing Yossi in such state.  I mean, getting hit by a car TWICE in one day? It's just...dayum.  :shocked:

On a related note, who did Miki call?


Quote
“Yocchan… I’m here for you… okay? I… I know you don't want me to get hurt or whatever… but… I’m here. I wanna help. You might be slightly stupid in the head… but ya know what? I don’t care. I… I love you…”

“… wanna… get… off…”

Maki stared down at what used to be a dead corpse, or what she thought was one. No coherent sentences, and her thoughts went right back to the zombies that she thought about earlier.

“… Ribs… ow… OW!”

Letting out a noise, Maki paused, unsure of what to do.

“OW. REST OF BODY OW!”

Another noise, followed by Hitomi moving around in Maki’s arms.

“Owwww… OOOOWWWW! Oh god! Ow!”

Maki blinked down at her. She didn’t seem to be horridly in pain. She was bleeding in a few places, but if she was still on the brink of death, there would have been quieter noises, and less moving.
I'd tend to agree with Maki, Yossi's being rather loud for someone who's supposed to be dying. :?


Quote
Oh, healing powers. Duh.
Indeed. Duh. ;D


Quote
“… Yocchan, I heard you the first time.”

“Ow! Ooooww-… oh… wanna kiss me, make it better?”

“… What happened to ‘going it alone’?”

“Oh fine, don’t be here for me…”

“Brat…”

“Yes, I am.”

The sound of sirens snapped them both out of the looks they gave each other, Hitomi’s was more of a suave ‘You know you want some of this,’ and Maki’s was a look of pure anger.
Well, looks like Yossi's gonna make it. She's making jokes and being all suave/cool and what not, after all.  :pimp:


Quote
“We should get out of the street.”

It was a neutral statement that came out of Hitomi’s mouth, but Maki wasn’t sure to follow it.

“If you get run over by a car, no one’ll be around to heal you.”

“Rika will.”

“She’s a mimic. You die, there’s nothing to mimic…”
Whoa, so Rika's power isn't healing, but instead copying the powers that the others have?  Interesting. It would have been nice if that little fact had been made known to us earlier though (or maybe I just missed the part where you did >_<).


Quote
Neither of them said it right out, as they finally settled on the sidewalk, but they both knew the other was thinking about it. An ambulance sped by, completely missing the scene of the accident, but it didn’t seem too concerned.
Okay, I'll ask it: So where was that ambulance headed for?


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“Yocchan… you gonna be alright?”

“Of course I am. You know me better than that. I’m tough! I’ll bounce back from anything!”

“There’s a snake next to you.”

“OHMIGOD WHERE?!”

She let out a noise, and clung to Maki, before realizing that the younger was laughing at her own joke. Hitomi snorted.
XD  Nice one Maki!


Quote
Maki let out another laugh before smiling over at Hitomi, who went solemn again. She was fiddling with her black cellphone, which was adorned with cute soccer balls and a little beetle sticker.
Futsal and Kabutomushi! :rockon:


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“I have to do this one on my own.”

...

“Will you come back?”

...

“I hope so. My plan is to stay alive… I’ve been lucky so far… but I can’t always depend on you…”

...

“No matter how much I might love you back.”

Maki smiled back, and the two shared a moment that one of them would later gag over how uncool it was to do it in public.
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!  :wub:


Quote
Seriously though, don’t wait up for me. Live life. Don’t mope around… ‘cause I really might not come back.”

“You’re dead set on that, aren’t you?”

There was a small silence between them.

“No. I don’t want to be… I’m just being a pessimist. Kaorin’s never been proven wrong before…”
She hasn't? Shit that's not exactly comforting.


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“I’ll be back. This time I promise.”

Without another word, Hitomi winked, and slowly walked off into the crowd.
Damn that's heroic. :cool1:

JPH!P :heart:'s kuro808, Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline whytphyre

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 12 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 2)
« Reply #96 on: July 26, 2007, 03:45:29 AM »
Thank you for posting, I felt unloved for a good two days.

Now you earn one of these:

 :otomerika:

Woo!

Anyyywho. To answer your responses.

If we've seen in the past, Hitomi does tend to contradict her own behaviors, or is hypocritical in her own right (at least in my stories). She tends to not care for her own well-being, while at the same time cares for everyone around her. It'll come up again later in the story.

I forgot to mention Rika's abilities myself (Mainly because I seriously thought I was going to stick with healing until about a chapter and a half ago). So it was me changing my mind and covering it up uneventfully.

Miki called Hitomi's mother. No reason other than my sick sense of humor.

And where that ambulance is going....

You'll find out soon enough.

 :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

Offline orangesocks

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 12 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 2)
« Reply #97 on: July 29, 2007, 04:45:36 AM »
Quote
Miki called Hitomi's mother. No reason other than my sick sense of humor.
Well horray for that cuz this fic is damn hilarious.  :yep:

God, that car came outta nowhere...And what're they going to do with Ayaya and Sayu, I wonder? The girl can conjure up a devil(?!)

Quote
“Moshimoshi! Ah! Hai, it’s Miki… yeah, just wanted to call and tell you to make sure the rest of clan Yoshizawa’s safe inside, and away from the streets… yeah, it seems that there’s a natural attraction for you people and cars.”

There was a pause, and Rika let out all hell on Miki, while the person on the other end, probably someone related to Hitomi, did the same.
Oh, Miki! I felt bad for laughing at this.

Mimicry seems like the perfect power for Rika. It made me think of Charmy, for some reason.

Yossie's farewell made me think of old western movies.
Cowboy says, "Yo, I'm leavin' lady," and lady goes, "foo, you best not die on me lest I whoop yo ass!" At least that's how I always interpreted the dialogue.

I think I need to re-read this.  All these multiple personalities and names! Gah, I hope Reina, Sayu, and Ai save Gaki-san... :(

Offline lil_hamz

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 12 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 2)
« Reply #98 on: July 29, 2007, 08:30:03 AM »
^ Me too. Maybe my inadequate brain can't keep up with intense, complex plots like this :P

Next time I'll post that I read even if I don't know what to say. Anyone knows where to go to up-size a brain? :lol:

But I can say one thing, the story is really well paced. There's a good portion of each part to build up one chapter for the next. *thumbs up*
« Last Edit: July 29, 2007, 08:34:21 AM by lil_hamz »

Offline whytphyre

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Re: Nanakusa (Chapter 12 :: Heartbreak Street pt. 2)
« Reply #99 on: August 03, 2007, 05:37:18 AM »
Sorry for the delay gang. I've been a bit busy with life...

For extra emphasis, there's only one set of multiple personalities, and that's Aya's at the moment ^^

Sorry again guys! The chapter should be up soon!

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