I'm not sure where this came from but I felt the need to write it
It's not very good but whatever
Hell, I think its just a stupid little story but I'm still posting it
Idk exactly who is who so you can decide for yourself
but if I had to assign people to this...it would be Reina talking about Ai
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It’s not fair, I love youI feel sick as I sit here across from you mentally undressing you with my eyes. I have longed for you to feel for me the way that I love you for three heartbreaking years that I don’t even know what to do with these pent up teenage hormones anymore. And it makes me feel sick.
I’m honestly not a pervert but I don’t know where to put this energy anymore. It’s like subconsciously I’m trying to convince myself that it’s only lust that I feel for you. So my mind is going to make me do perverted thing that make me just sick. My stomach churns and I try to tell myself to stop because I think you are just the most magnificent thing in the world and you can’t be tainted.
But here I sit across the stage, tracing the outline of your chest with my eyes and trying to picture what it looks like underneath that pale yellow shirt. How it would feel for me to run my hands down the side of your body and softly caress your skin.
Wait, where are you going? I’m just getting to the good part of envisioning you’re perfect body undressed and beneath me. I felt my stomach heave a little as I realized that I was doing it again. I scolded myself for letting just those thoughts enter my brain but more importantly that those thoughts had left me with a burning desire coursing through my body.
I watched you walk off the stage and out into the lobby for a glass of water and when you came back inside you looked refreshed. I smiled to myself as I got lost in your beauty. I wished I didn’t pine for you as I do. I closed my eyes and hung my head. I wish I never fell in love with you even at that time when I hardly knew you.
You took your place in our circle across from me once again. But instead of sitting down you bent forward to lie down on your stomach. No one was paying attention to you except me. They were all chatting waiting for the director to arrive so we could start rehearsal. This meant I was the only one who saw your slight embarrassment as your shirt reached a little too low and so when you lied down you had to pull it up higher than it was supposed to be.
That’s when you caught my eye. I couldn’t read what was going through you head but I was obviously caught for staring. I tried to play it off by smirking to poke fun at you for wearing such a revealing shirt. It seemed to work for you smiled sheepishly before resting your head in your hands.
I stared at your hair as it spilled out across the stage. I began to let my eyes wander all over your body once again. I was sitting up so I could see your full length as you lie there perfectly still. I could see your curves perfectly even under the slight baggy pants you were currently wearing. It’s like my mind had memorized your body from all the times I stared at you.
I finally forced myself to look away from you and at the door. Just focus on when the director was going to arrive. What you’re doing isn’t right. She doesn’t even know you have these thoughts about her, this has got to be in some way unethical.
* * * * *
Finally we had begun rehearsal and the director was telling some strange story about fish. We were still sitting across from each other and I looked over at you. You had the same confused face as I’m sure I did. Our eyes met and we both mouthed the same words, “where is this going?”
You smiled and looked down at the floor a slight blush playing on your cheeks. Maybe you do feel the same way? That’s got to be a sign that we think the same right? Or maybe I’m just completely over thinking the situation.
He finished his story and it turns out there was no point. I stifled a laugh as I saw you roll your eyes slightly before going to your place on stage.
* * * * *
The next scene we rehearse I’m not in so I sit in a chair off on the wings watching you. You’re sitting on a bench facing away from me. And there comes that sick feeling again.
I can see the top of your underwear protruding from your pants. There nothing fancy, just plain white. But they start those strange thoughts again and I want to punch myself in the face. I can’t move my eyes away, and you have no idea that I’m in fact not watching your brilliant acting, but instead I’m watching the top of your underwear that you probably have no idea is even visible.
* * * * *
Finally rehearsal ends and I can go home. But then you call my name on the way out, you’ve got a book in your hand and you wave it above your head. I wish you didn’t have so much control over me otherwise I probably could have pretended I didn’t hear you. But you do have that control and so I stop and wait for you.
“Here, read the back of this I think you’ll like it. I’m reading it right now.”
I take the book from you and look at the back. I try my hardest to concentrate on the words in front of me but now all I can think about is why me? Surely she could have picked someone else. So maybe she just likes to spend time with me and having me read the back of a book is perfect? No damnit, I’m over thinking things again.
It probably just is a book that she thought I would enjoy. Nothing more, nothing less. Someone calls your name signaling that your ride to go home is here.
I try to hurry up to not hold you back from leaving but I just can’t concentrate on the words. As much as I want to be able to discuss this book with you I probably won’t even remember the title once you walk away. Finally I just give up not wanting to waste any more of your time.
“Yea, it sounds really interesting. Cool.” I smile.
You smile back before waving as you walk away. I watch you as your hips sway and those thoughts come back and I gag a little.
Stupid stupid me. It’s not fair…to either of us.
Topic: Heyyou should read this! (short stories updated: August 17th) (Read 19599 times)