The Adventures of Derprin - Kikuchi Ayaka&Katayama Haruka
[aka the fic that went from super angst to cracky]
“So… I heard from Natsumii.” I started slowly already feeling my hands sweat. It wasn’t supposed to start like this, but this is my only chance. “About? What type of rumors has that love sick fool been spreading now?” you retorted bitterly, ouch guess you’re still bitter over MaYuki. “Ouch, just thought I’d come to see if you wanted to get out of here. Ya know, away from the lovey dovey couples?” I offered my fingers crossed and everything. “Uh sure let me just grab my jacket.” You went to grab your jacket off the couch and threw a glance at a certain couple you came back. Grabbing your hand I pulled you out the door, is it so hard to see that I’m jealous? Jealous of how much you love Yukirin, jealous that you would willingly give her up to Mayu just to see her smile. Both you and Nacchan are fools. Can’t you at least see that I’m here? It doesn’t matter if you’re still in love with Yukirin…
It had always been you…
Can’t you see?
Can’t you stop being blinded?
Can’t you see the coward who’s loved you since the beginning?
The one who’s seen all of your longing glances, the subtle touches, and the loving gazes.
Can’t you just see me?
“Hey… are you alright?” you asked me concernedly noticing that I was spacing out. I gave you a slight smile before replying, “I’ll be alright.” You stared at me for a while with a doubtful look before looking up at the night sky. I was subtly staring at our still joined hands when I heard you ask, “Where are we going?” It had been such a long time since I’ve last held your hands, probably not since my scandal. We haven’t been alone together since then either.
I truthfully told you, “Where do you want to go? I got nowhere to go tonight.” It was true I had not expected this to happen and was planning on bitterly staring at you all night anyways. “My place? We haven’t hung out since…” you suggested while mentioning that taboo topic. I wonder if you thought I loved him, the boy I lost AKB48 for. He was my scapegoat, in a desperate attempt to prove to myself that I didn’t love you. It was silly wasn’t it? To risk everything to prove to myself that I wasn’t in love with a fellow member.
“Yeah it’s been a while.” I replied quietly, trying to avoid your curious gaze, you wanted to know how I would react. With a slow and steady pace we walked towards your house which was surprisingly close to where the party was being held. I never let go of your hand and you never tried to shake me off along the way. The road was so familiar yet distant; it had been years since the two of us were in this situation.
I think it’s been three years, to think that my stupidity would have cost myself three years by your side. I regret all of it; maybe this will be a time for me to make up for the past three years of being a stranger. Katayama Haruka, will you allow me the honor of being by your side again?
“You know it gets kind of creepy with you sneaking looks at me you know…” You said with an embarrassed tone. “Damnit, I got caught.” I replied trying to joke it off, but you just looked at me with flushed face that made me want to throw myself against a wall. I felt my face flush too as I turned away.
“Kikuji, don’t you miss the old Team B days?” You asked trying to change the topic. “I do, but we had to grow up at some time. Can’t always be running around the theatre with Gon and trying to climb the pillars now can we?” I replied with a smile, the mere memory was just too precious. You laughed before adding, “I still can’t believe you got Yukirin to join you two, to think she was the responsible one.” “Let’s just say that Gon can be very, very convincing when she wants to be. Although the punishment was horrible, it’s still a fun memory.” I was grinning; Yuki was the one who got the worst punishment out of the three of us she even told me she had nightmares about it afterwards.
The atmosphere had noticeably lightened as we continued the walk towards your house. “So, how’s team K?” you asked with a curious tone. “Fun, really fun although Sayaka’s some like evil Spartan warrior like teacher. Yuko’s a pervert, but hey that’s not my problem~ Flat-chest senbatsu you know.” I said with a joking tone, I really did come to love Team K like a second home.
“I’m glad you like it there, although to me nothing beats old team B!” You said energetically, while swinging my arm like a child. Which might I add was the most adorable thing ever, even though you act all mature you’re still a child just like when you first auditioned for Team B. Nothing will ever change my first image of you, even if you did eventually grow up to be such a fine person.
“Nothing beats seeing you trip everywhere during practices, you mean.” I added with a laugh, I will never let you live that down. I don’t know if you woke up on the wrong side of bed or something but seeing you fail at every single dance was just hilarious. The usually praised dancer, being scolded by sensei now that helped sooth our struggling dancer’s minds. If Haachan can mess up sometimes, so can we was what we comforted ourselves with. CinDY although strict, was right everyone made mistakes and we just needed to learn from them.
You whipped your head towards me after hearing my jab, “It was one time okay Kikuji! One time, why won’t you ever let me live it down?” you wailed to me while trying to pull my arm off. “No, it’s one of our fondest memories of Haachan you know.” I told you with a sheepish smile, at least it’s one of my favourite memories of you the others… I’m not too sure about.
I felt you suddenly tug on my hands and I turned back to you in confusion. “Hey, we’re here already where do you think you’re going?” You said teasingly, my cheeks flushed from both the embarrassment and the smile that you were giving me. I raised my free hand up to my head to sheepishly scratch it while giving you a lame smile, boy do I go into unattractive fail mode whenever I’m with you. “Come on you weird child.” You insulted before tugging me towards the door. “I’m not weird! Or a child!” I retorted with a childlike voice, whoops that wasn’t supposed to happen. “Right Kikuji… right.” You said in a disbelieving tone which just made me want to smash my head against a wall. At this rate, I’ll never be able to win an argument against you.
“Is nobody home?” I asked quietly when I noticed that there were no lights turned on in the house. “Yeah, they’re all visiting for Christmas; I couldn’t go because of the schedules.” She told me with a pout before dragging me upstairs towards her room… Not that I memorized the layout of her house or anything.
Sometimes I just want to slam my head against a wall to stop myself from thinking the way that I do. Sayaka would laugh so hard if she found out not only was I an idiot but I thought like a complete love sick idiot. “You know… if you damage the walls you have to pay right?” I heard you tell me. “What?” I asked before finally understanding. I was right about to slam my head against the wall next to your room. My head dropped from embarrassment, man today is just not going that well.
“Now that your back in the real world, go in and I’ll grab us something to drink.” You said before going back downstairs to the kitchen. Haachan’s room was so different from the last time that I’ve come here, but then again that’s to be expected isn’t it? She’s all grown up now, if she was already called mama back then she’s like an obaa-san now. I’m such a terrible person, calling my extreme crush an obaa-san. It’s not my fault that’s she’s all showa and everything. She’s cute like that anyways, I don’t even know what I’m thinking anymore.
I took a seat under the kotasu trying to warm my freezing legs, why oh why did I choose to wear a short skirt. It was practically freezing outside, gosh another idiotic choice made to add to my growing pile. I looked around the room but nothing caught my eye until I tried to peak under her bed and HOLY MOTHER FUCKING GOD I AM TOTALLY IMAGINING THINGS. I whipped my head away and tried to brush away the blood seeping from my nose but it just would stop. “God, Kikuji what the hell did you do?! You better not have dirtied my carpet!” I heard Haachan say as she rushed into the room trying to help me stop my nosebleed.
“I’m sorry.” I stumbled out while stuffing the tissues she passed me up my nose. This was by far the most embarrassing thing ever. “Kikuji, what in the world is wrong with you today? Are you sure you aren’t deathly ill or something…” Haachan started to say, excuse me I’m not sick, okay maybe love sick. Oh my god that was beyond lame, someone save me from myself. “You got some blood on your shirt, take it off we need to wash it before it dries.” Haachan told me before trying to tug it off of me. I was struggling, my face having become beet red from the mere suggestion. In fact I think more blood was gushing out of my nose from that suggestion. “I-I can do it myself!” I shouted trying to stop Haachan from stripping me.
You just gave me a strange look before stopping, “Oh gosh Kikuji it’s not like I haven’t seen you naked before. Why so shy all of the sudden?” You asked me and I just stayed there frozen. You rolled your eyes and muttered something about taking a page out of Takahashi’s book. I’m not a man like Takahashi okay?!? I mean she’d refuse too if it were Amina trying to strip her! You turned around to grab me a random shirt you had lying around; I sure hope that thing is clean. After handing me the shirt you started busying yourself with your cell phone and saying, “Hurry the hell up and change I need to wash your shirt.”
Shyly turning around I changed in like milliseconds, things that we learn in AKB48: how to change at the speed of light. I passed you my stained shirt and you left the room again leaving me all alone. I could smell your perfume from this shirt and it was giving me bad thoughts. It was those unnecessary thoughts that gave me the nosebleed in the first place. I sighed, falling onto my back I looked up at the plain ceiling. I was starting to get sleepy, my eyes were drooping and before I knew it everything was black.
“Ayarin…”
“…that baka….sleeping…”
“...sleepover…”
“…stupid baka…”
When I woke up, those were the only words that I remembered hearing while I was half asleep. The lights were turned off and I had been moved to your bed. A very painstakingly obvious thought passed my mind as I turned to look at the clock. There was no way I’d be able to make it home since it was already past midnight. I wanted to just faint again, I will have to sleepover at your house for the first time. I rubbed my eyes and pulled myself out of the covers, your scent was getting intoxicating.
I walked outside of your room and saw the lights coming from downstairs, I almost tripping down the stairs while trying to get down them. I was still trying to rub the sleep away from my eyes when I derpily walked into the living where you were. “So you’re finally awake.” You told me without taking your eyes off the screen. I turned to see the screen only see that it was her on it, no wonder you were so focused. I’ll never be able to take your eyes off of her will? “I’m hungry.” I whined trying my best to distract you. Am I not good enough?
“Okay, okay, I’ll make you something to eat. You don’t grow up do you Kikuji?” You said with a sigh before pulling yourself away from the TV. I can’t tell if it was a victory or not… do you really just see me as a child? I’m not like Harugon, I can handle myself… I don’t want to end up like her chasing after someone who just sees her like a sister. It’s far more painful to be close to the one you like but know that they’ll never look at you in the way that you want them to.
I took a seat on the couch that you just left and sighed. It was just me left alone to face the TV, which was showing what you think to be your only love. I’m just not good enough compared to her huh, maybe if I never got into the scandal I might be able to compete. Who knows what could have happened… but I just had to screw it up for all of us. I know I’ve said it a billion times after my scandal, but I honestly am sorry for everything. I brought Team B down with me when I got fired, and I made everyone cry. I’ll never feel like I belong in Team B anymore, I betrayed everyone that year.
I just sat there blaming myself for what must have been an eternity because the next second I decided to return from dreamland I could smell something tasty. I guess you were almost done with what would be our midnight snack. Pulling myself up from my depressing seat in front of the TV I walked towards the kitchen to take a peak. I’ll be honest I wasn’t expecting to see such a… shocking sight. You know, that feeling when you see the person you like being all pretty and everything and they just like shine to you. Yeah I have no idea what I’m saying but I was just plain shocked at how flawless she looked to me. It was only then that the thought, ‘I want to see this for the rest of my life’ passed my mind.
I’ve always been too afraid to dream of a future with you because I knew about you and Yuki. To this day I couldn’t of fathomed being able to see you cooking for me or even being this close to you again. You turned around and saw me just derping there before sighing again and ordering, “Don’t just stand there; set the table the things are in that cupboard.” I walked towards the cupboard that you pointed two and grabbed the things for the both of us I was guessing that you were eating too. After setting the table I walked back into the kitchen wondering if you needed any help but you just shoo-ed me away. So I just went back to the table to space out about how ethereal everything was, it was almost homely. Then again, you and I would never be possible; I could never have that future that I’m imagining right now.
“Ayaka, you really need to stop spacing out.” You told me while placing down the bowl of noodles that you were making. “I’m sleepy?” I said, I actually kind of was with all of this drama. Being with near you is so hard; it takes all my strength not to just run away. “Eat then go to bed okay? I made you lots cause god knows that you need to stop looking like a stick.” You started off caring then you just had to throw in a jab, no wonder they all call you a S. That’s alright though, because I’m a M. Oh god Yuko is rubbing off on me with her lame ass jokes.
“Alright.” I said timidly before starting on my bowl of noodles, she seriously seems intent on making me fat what is with all this meat. You just sat there across from me watching me like a creep, wait isn’t that my job? Something is wrong… “Uh Haachan, why are you staring at me like that.” I asked totally confused, did I have something on my face or something. “Just making sure you don’t randomly faint again.” You told me and I just wanted to run away in embarrassment. Today was just not my day; somebody out there is playing one very cruel joke with me. “Um… would be alright if I asked you a question?” I asked, there was just something I was far too curious about, actually I was kind of afraid of how you were going to answer.
“Ask, I mean why are you so shy all of the sudden, we’ve known each other for years.” Haachan replied propping her head onto the table and gave me a curious look. “Why Yuki…?” You had a slight frown on your face and I thought that you wouldn’t reply to my question. It suddenly became silent and as bad as it was, the only sound of the tv was heard – and the occasional voice of the girl in question. I was in the middle of thinking of a way to redirect the topic when you said, “I don’t know.” I looked at you, surprised with the amount sincerity you showed. “I just don’t know why I’m in lo- I mean why I like her.
“Oh…” I voiced, it wasn’t a lie that I was disappointed by this answer. “Ayaka…” You said hesitantly, it was only then that I realized how serious you were becoming. I gulped suddenly realizing just how awkward it was to have you staring into my eyes. “Ayaka, I know you like me.” You said grabbing my hand. I gave a confused look, my brain didn’t understand what she just told me. “W-what?” I stuttered out thinking that I just imagined what she just said.
“I know you like me.” You repeated, this time painfully slowly while staring right into my eyes. Coupled with the fact that you were still holding on to my hand, I really did think that I was going to faint again. “Breathe Ayaka, I don’t want you to die on me.” You told me before rolling your eyes, I gave a small pout. I wouldn’t die from something as little as this! Oh crap, I think my mind finally processed what she said, “Wait! What?!!? I don’t like you!” I shouted getting up and preparing ready to run away. You just starred me down and I dropped back into my seat, shrinking with every minute passing by.
“Now that you’re finally awake, about what I was saying. I know you life me, I’ve always known. I just chose to ignore it because of Yukirin and now that she’s gone. There’s no reason for me to pretend.” You continued on, and I could feel myself bubbling with hope. Does it mean that I actually have a chance now? After so many years, you’ll finally give me a chance? Better yet, I didn’t have to confess. “B-but.” You continued. Oh I guess there wasn’t hope at all I thought as my face fell. “I’m not ready for this, I don’t want to reject you or anything. It’s just that I’m not ready, I don’t want you to feel like I’m just using you to get over Yuki.” You told me, the grasp you had only hand only getting tighter.
I looked away; I had never expected something like this to happen. I never even dreamed of a chance for you to acknowledge my feelings, but here you are in front of me telling me that I have a chance. What am I supposed to feel? I don’t even know how I should react right now. There was one thing I knew for sure though, I was okay with waiting. If I’ve already waited for so many years I’m sure that even if it meant waiting for another few years I’d be alright. I put my other hand on top of yours and told you, “It’s alright. If you want me to be the rebound I’d be alright with that. If you want me to wait, to give you time I’m perfectly fine with that. I just want you to be happy, that’s what I’ve wanted from the start.”
You know this sounds like its right out of a crappy romance novel that I could never get past the first page of, and I was pretty sure that if I ever looked back at this I would be cringing at the words that I just spoke. There was this moment of silence as you stared at me in disbelief I couldn’t tell if it was because of my words or the fact that I actually said something like that. “You know, I probably never expected something like that in my life from you Kikuji.” You told me with a smile, and I awkwardly removed my hand from above yours only to have you grab it with your other free one.
“But I’ll keep that in mind.” You continued with an even bigger smile, and my face flushed red. I struggled out of your grasp awkwardly because I knew that if it went on for any longer I would actually faint again. That smile, you shouldn’t even be allowed to smile at me. That thing is like a murder weapon to me, and only me. “I-I guess we should probably finish eating.” I stuttered out, hoping to change the topic. You nodded back at me and we fell into silence again, very very uncomfortable silence for me. I had no idea how I was supposed to act now. Why oh why world do you play this type of cruel joke to me.
We quickly finished dinner and headed back upstairs so to her bedroom. We were inside and she had just finished setting up my futon when she came up to me and asked, “Oh Kikuji did you want to shower with me tomorrow?” with the most innocent look ever. SHOWER. WITH. HER. At that point my brain blacked out and I felt myself fall into her arms, and could hazily hear her say “whoops”
Topic: [Oneshots] Baking [Shimazaki Haruka & Yokoyama Yui] (Jan 10) (Read 55037 times)