I am really sorry for not posting my story since forever
I have been really busy for these few months
may i get your apologize for this one shot?
AISo here I am, alone by myself, in the last day of my school day. When the other person, by any mean my friends and classmates, are laughing or chatting with each other, I am sitting here in the corner. I am not a social person but a few days ago I still had a best friend.
She is such a charming person, a beautiful lady with many friends. I don’t really know why she wanted to be friend with me since the first time. We have too many differences with us, but there we are, being best friend that made many other students envy for almost three years.
Are you wondering why we separate? It’s all because of my selfishness. As I am not a social person, I don’t really have friend at all. And she is just too hard to resist. She with her charm just broke away to my heart. At first I thought that we were best friend no more. And as I know her day by day, I begin to feel something strange.
Whenever I see her, my heartbeat begins to race. I just want to make her smile, to protect her. I become an overprotective person whenever it comes to her. At first the other friends don’t really care about me being overprotective but one day a friend of her told us that I already acting too much. I didn’t really care of her words. I just am showing my care for my friend that’s all.
Until the time that same friend told us about the same thing for the nth time. My said best friend then told me to stop of what I am doing. I feel a really hurt pain in my heart but I don’t want to make my best friend feel bad. So I tried to stop caring of her. Just being in her side and her best friend is enough, I thought.
And I was truly wrong. I can’t stop caring, I can’t stop overprotecting. Whenever she holds the other friend hand, I feel pain. If the other could hold hand with her then why I can’t? Then one day, I tried to think about it, the feeling I have. I realized that I want more then best friend. I love her.
So a week before the graduation ceremony I gathered all of mu courage to told her my feeling and I don’t want to separate with this uncertainty situation.
“Rie… ” I said as I approached her slowly.
“Ah…” she looked a bit surprised, no wonder because I had been avoiding her for three days.
“If you don’t mind, can we have a little talk?” I said again, not making any eye contact with her.
“Sure, let’s go,” she said, as if knowing that I don’t want the other hear our talk.
When we arrived at the back of our class, I couldn’t say anything. My hands began to sweating.
“So… What do you want to talk?” she opened the conversation first.
“Actually i…” I said nervously, looking down.
“Wait, before you say your words. Can I ask you something?” she said.
“Yeah... sure,” I said still looking down, feel a bit relieved.
“Why do you avoiding me for these days? You didn’t read my message even though you are online, why did you do that?” she said, took a step closer to me.
“I…” I mumbled.
“Why did you do that for me? We are friend, aren’t we?” she said.
“I…”
“Don’t you want to be friend with me anymore?” she said, her voice began to trembling.
“It’s not like that, I just…”
“You just what? Look at me Rino. Why don’t you want to look at me?” she said as she took more step closer.
“I like you Rie,” I said softly, almost heard as a mumbling.
“I like you too,” she said.
“No, not that way. I like you, I love you,” I said as I looked deep into her eyes.
“I just can’t help when I see you with Yuihan, I feel burning inside, and I can’t stop that feeling,”
“I thought that I like you as a friend but no, I love you,”
“I know that this is wrong, but I just want to tell you about it,” I said then ran away.
I am such a coward, right? And since that day I haven’t talk to her, i am the one who avoid her though. I feel relieve because I had told her about my feeling but I feel terrible at the same time. Our society will never allow our relation. Heh… what am I thinking? We are not together so if the society allows or not, it’s not a matter.
I looked at her for the last time. She is still laughing with her friends. That smile, I miss it so much. I stood up from my chair and went back home.
People said that love is happiness but for me love is the other form of pain.
The EndThank you so much...
PS:Do you know? half of the story is my own experience?