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PART 9 - FUJIMOTO - JUNE 5TH - ONE HOUR LATER
"Stop that."
"Stop what?" Yossi blinked innocently.
"Stop feeding An-kun your leftovers under the table," I replied.
"I honestly have no idea what you're..." Yossi trailed off as the unmistakable sound of "Mini Moni. Telephone Ring Ring Ring!" filled the air. I groaned and got up to get my phone. "Yaguchi?" she asked knowingly.
"I don't even know how she keeps getting near my damn phone," I muttered. "What the hell... 'Unknown'?"
"Answer it anyway," Yossi replied. "I've got to clean up, so you might as well amuse yourself by yelling at a random stranger." I laughed.
"Hello?" I said sweetly in my best former-office-lady voice. Yossi snickered as she walked into the kitchen.
"...eh!? Do I have the wrong number?"
"...oh, right, international numbers show up as 'unknown', huh?" I muttered.
"Ah! It IS you!" Makoto exclaimed.
"Yeah, yeah, what do you want?"
"I didn't interrupt anything did I?" she asked with a suggestive laugh.
"Nah, Yocchan's in the kitchen."
"Perfect! I need you to do something for me!"
"The hell. Why?"
"Because I helped you get out of Morning and it'll be hilarious," she replied with an audible grin. I groaned.
"You're exhaustingly perky, you know that?" Makoto just laughed. "Fine. What?"
"Ok, so my classmate showed me this awesome website called your tubing or something."
"Your Tubing?! Have you been drinking?"
"No, that's not the right name... whatever, it doesn't matter. So, anyway, it has all these old tv shows and stuff and - "
"Why do I care about this crap?" I complained, leaning over in my chair to stare at Yossi's butt as she washed the dishes.
"Trust me! Ok, so there was this old Utaban episode with Yoshizawa on it."
"And you relived your early days of fangirlish wonder?" I asked distractedly. Yossi had started singing to herself and halfassedly dancing in front of the sink.
"AND you need to do me a favor."
"Yes, you mentioned that already. Are you sure you haven't been drinking?"
"Only a little, but that's beside the point. I need you to call Yoshizawa 'Tomiko'."
"...huh?"
"Trust me! It will be fantastic!"
"Why To-"
"Just do it!" Makoto cut me off excitedly. I rolled my eyes.
"HEY, TOMIKO!" I called into the kitchen. Yossi visibly jumped and dropped the plate into the sink, splashing water all over herself. She whirled around, blushing horribly. She looked at me in shock, then her eyes focused on the phone in my hand. She narrowed her eyes and started towards me.
"Who is that?" she demanded.
"That was HILARIOUS!" I exclaimed into the phone, getting up from my chair to try and escape the approaching attack.
"What'd she do? What'd she do?" Makoto exclaimed excitedly.
"She dropped a plate in the sink and got soapy water all over herself and turned bright red!" I replied gleefully.
"Is that Kei!?" Yossi tried to grab the phone from me. "Kei, that better not be you! If it is, I'm so telling everyone about - "
"It's not Yasuda!" I laughed, wiggling out of her grasp again. "What is up with the 'Tomiko' thing anyway?" I asked Makoto.
"She said on that Utaban she wanted to be called 'Tomiko' by her boyfriend!" Makoto snickered.
"You're KIDDING!" I exclaimed as I was finally captured with an arm around my waist. Yossi easily picked me up with one arm and took the phone out of my hand with the other.
"Maki!?" she yelled into the phone, holding me against her. She glanced over at me. "MAKOTO!? What the hell!? Where did you even.... DON'T CALL ME THAT, DAMN!....Hello?!" She pulled the phone away from her ear and stared at it for a minute. "She hung up on me."
"Ah, is that so, Tomiko?" I grinned. She smacked my stomach and released me.
"Yeah, seriously. No." she groaned, looking down at her soapy shirt.
"Aw, you changed your mind?" I snickered as she tossed me my phone.
"I was like 15. I've changed my mind about a lot of things since then," she replied, pulling her shirt off over her head and headed back into the kitchen.
"If you're trying to distract me by taking your shirt off..." Yossi turned and glanced at me over her shoulder with a smirk. "..It's totally working," I finished with a grin.
"Just don't snap my bra, ok?" she laughed.
"Then don't put the idea in my head!" I replied. I glanced at my watch. "Wow, I've gotta get home."
"...what?"
"I have a meeting first thing tomorrow. I have to go home," I replied, picking up An-kun. I walked over to the couch to grab Hima-chan.
"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait..." Yossi sputtered. "You're leaving!?"
"Yes, that's generally what going home means."
"Why can't you stay over again?" she asked, pouting a little.
"Because I don't have clothes here and, well, I love you, but I'm not wearing a tracksuit to a meeting," I replied, walking over to the door.
"Wait, you're seriously leaving?"
"Yes."
"All that work and I'm not even getting laid?" She looked so affronted that I burst out laughing. I shifted the dogs in my arms and managed to open the door.
"I told you before. Fujimoto Miki is not some sort of For-A-Good-Time-Call Girl! I don't put out on the first date!" I blew her a kiss and walked out the door, kicking it shut behind me.
"YOU SUCK, FUJIMOTO!" I heard her yell through the door. I laughed to myself as I walked down the hallway.
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Gee, I wonder what newly subbed Utaban
I watched this weekend