Chapter 11 (a.k.a. cold Aya chap) enjoy!
Friend or Foe?
Aya had spent the entire morning recalling the earlier incident which unfolded at Maki's apartment and fixing all the events that had occurred over the past few months like a jigsaw puzzle. The result was fruitless as there were too many pieces and no picture for reference. She had serious doubts over her own analysis and the part that she was certain about was the fact that Maki had attempted to run her down. Why did Maki do that? But if she did not do so, surely, they would not have become so close. Was it destiny or just a well-judged plan?
Arriving late at the studio, Aya's eyes were swollen from the tears that defiantly ran down her cheeks earlier. Her face was pale from the light make-up that she applied hurriedly in the morning. Morning Musume were just about to take a break when Aya hurried past the corridor which had rooms lined neatly at both sides. Upon seeing Aya's silhouette zooming past, Miki immediately shoved Eri and Reina to the side and dashed out of the room.
She had no idea why there was a sudden surge of adrenaline when she saw Aya and she dismissed it as yet another of her queer habits. She eventually caught up with Aya. Before she realized, she was barely three feets away from Aya and even then, she did not know what she should say or do to her. The lines that she had been rehearsing since that fateful day had vanished into some unknown black holes.
As she was debating with herself, she heard footsteps rushing towards her from behind. "I need to appear relaxed," she repeated this line to herself. She followed behind Aya from a safe distance. Soon, she felt a gush of wind and saw a familiar figure appearing in front of her. "Aya," the figure spoke in a tender voice, "we need to talk."
Aya turned back and frowned at the figure with apprehension. When she saw Miki, there was a slight sign of surprise on her face. When the figure followed Aya's glance and looked at Miki, Miki realised that the person was no other than the detested Goto Maki. Aya scurried towards Miki, grabbed her hand and dragged Miki to the end of the corridor hurriedly.
As she was about to round the corner, Aya stopped abruptly, turned her head back and spoke bluntly, "We have nothing to talk about."
Maki, who was still rooted on the same spot, defended, "Aya, you need to empathize with me and-"
"Maki, I'd spent a night trying to understand but really, I don't think I'm smart enough to comprehend, let alone empathize."
"Everything started because of you, Aya. Initially-"
"Stop it, Maki," Aya's voice had turned gentler and tears began to well up in her eyes, "You're at the wrong. You hurt me. Don't shrug your responsibilities as though they never existed before. If you continue like this, I don't think I'm able to talk to you as a person anymore."
"Aya-"
"You've no need to defend yourself because to me, this is a clear and simple picture," she paused to sniff before continuing, "I'll not pursue that accident if that is your main concern." At that, Aya pulled Miki and ran into the elevator.
In the elevator, there was silence except for the girls' puffing for air. Miki was taken aback by the conversation that took place earlier and therefore, was left speechless. The girl whimpering beside her was her best friend and some months ago, Miki had known everything of her. But ever since that accident, the tiny gap between them had been expanding and at this moment, Miki felt that she was unable to reach Aya. Finally managing to summon up her courage, Miki stretched out her hand and asked politely with a gentle smile, "Do you want to have lunch with me?"
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"I need to appear relaxed," Miki repeated the line in her mind once more. Staring at Aya who was stirring the coffee in a complete daze, Miki placed her elbows on the table and unknowingly, imitated Aya's action. Despite her wits, she was unable to figure out what exactly had happened between Aya and Maki. The only clear conclusion she could deduce was the friendship between them had ended. She grinned.
"Are you sure you don't want any food?" Miki broke the silence. Aya shook her head. Surely, whatever Maki had done had caused some immense damage to Aya. "Aya, I thought over this for some time already."
"What?" this was the first word Aya had uttered to Miki in the cafeteria.
"GAM. I think I will quit Morning Musume for GAM. This is what I'd decided over the past few days." Miki rushed through her words; something she always does when she is lying.
"Are you certain?" Aya enquired. Finally, she was showing some signs of interest in the conversation.
"Yes, Mikitty doesn't spend days thinking and ending up regretting her decision!" Miki giggled towards the end. Usually, Aya would be the one doing this.
Aya stopped stirring her cup of coffee, tilted her head slightly to the right and stared straight into Miki's eyes. "Miki, you're lying."
"I'm not!"
"I'd just seen a professional liar yesterday and this morning and so I can't be sensing this wrongly. Do you happen to realize that I'm your close friend? This cannot escape me."
Miki smiled as an indication of conceded defeat. "You really know me."
"Of course. Tell me, honestly, Morning Musume or GAM? I'll not blame you."
Miki twisted her lips before rushing through her words, "Actually, I'm rather neutral about this. GAM and MM are different to me but I like both of them equally much. What about you?"
Aya picked up the small spoon and started stirring the cup of coffee in front of her. "Miki, you're so strange. You can't even stay neutral over the amount of sugar and milk in your coffee. You're so particular about such things. Don't treat me like an idiot." Miki wanted to rebuke Aya but chose to stay silent as she recalled the earlier incident that took place in the same cafeteria days ago. Aya continued, "If you had asked me this question earlier, I would have said GAM but not now. Not that I enjoy been a soloist, but I can't stand someone lying to me the whole day just because she thinks that I'll be hurt if the truth is to be said. This is simply unacceptable especially if that someone happens to be my best friend."
"Aya, I really love GAM. You should know that clearer than me, right? After all, I really enjoy working with you."
Aya stirred her cup of coffee with such momentum that some of it spilled onto the table. "You can't even find an appropriate topic to speak about at a time like this when I just had a quarrel with someone. And you end up talking about an issue that you're not even certain about. It really shows something. Do you know what it is?" Aya paused and stared at Miki who shook her head in silence. "It shows the weakness in our friendship. You are uncertain about our relationship, friendship, GAM and whatever else that involves the two of us."
Miki was a little upset that Aya hit the nail. Either something drastic took place in the space of 2 days or Aya had been acting dumb for the whole duration of their friendship. The former had a higher probability of taking place. She plucked up her courage and spoke slowly, "Maki, what had she done? Don't hide anything from me, Aya."
For the next hour, Aya narrated to Miki everything that took place and Miki listened attentively. Aya did not mention about Yossie being the accomplice, Maki confessing to her and her mix of emotions for Maki. Even without these parts, Miki seemed to be astonished by the facts. As Aya spoke, the gap between them had narrowed down considerably.
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"This is it for today! Everyone had worked hard!" the dance instructor shouted. A sigh of relief could be audibly heard. "Kusumi, Sayumi and Reina, you're improving!" Screeches of happiness were echoed in the sound-proof room. Yossie shook her head with a tiny smile glued on her sweaty face before she was led to one dark corner by her senpai. Interested to discover some new facts, Miki followed them and hid behind a pillar.
"Why did you do that? Didn't you promise that everything regarding the plan should be in the form of verbal communication?"
"I couldn't find you and to be honest, I'm disgusted by your affection for that girl, Maki." Yossie said matter-of-factly.
"Now, I am in deep shit."
"Just because that girl knows about all these?"
"No, she said she will not pursue that accident."
"That is all you should be concerned about. So what else?" Yossie spoke sarcastically.
"In these past few months, for the first time, I’ve treated someone so dearly and I’ve experienced something that I’ve never had the chance to experience before – close friendship. She has given something that no one has ever given me before and now it’s all gone because of your one message."
"Where is your sense of responsibility, senpai?" Maki's eyes widened as this sounded uncomfortably similar to what Aya had spoken earlier on. "I understand how you feel. But do you remember yourself agreeing to the plan some months ago? It wasn't my decision. I'm no fortune teller. At that time, I was unable to foresee your love for Aya. I thought you detested her then." Maki remained silent. “Listen, it's good that she doesn't want to pursue. Even so, I believe 'she' will like to close this case on a high-note and therefore, the plan will continue to be executed. Now we can only hope that Aya and Miki will agree to form a full-term band before the deadline that Tsunku issued them some days ago. If not, we would need to carry out Plan C which I don't think you will fancy very much because your beloved Aya will certainly cry again. Therefore please don’t do anything silly to ruin the plan again. Remember you're there to make Miki jealous of the Aya and your friendship so that GAM will be formed." Yossie grinned to herself.
"You're despicable! Do you know what my plan is? It is to surrender myself and tell the whole truth to the higher authorities!" Maki pushed Yossie away with all her might.
"You mean police, huh?" Yossie glared at her menacingly, twisted her lips and slapped her hard. "I hate to use violence but I really feel that some senses need to be knocked into your head." Yossie pulled Maki towards her and squeezed her shoulder blades hard. "I hate to say this but your career is at stake at this moment. You enjoy singing, don’t you? You're not doing anyone good, not even yourself, by backstabbing us. Get it?" Maki turned silence. Yossie let out a laugh before she walked off. "Remember don’t try anything funny," she said, back facing Maki without a slightest trace of sincerity in her tone. Maki was left watching the disappearing figure and tears that had been holding up since the early morning began to stream down her cheeks. Thinking back, yesterday Aya was lying onto her at this time. Why did everything change in the space of 24 hours? There was no one she could trust or rely in H!P now. No more good, comforting Yossie or lovely, sweet Aya.
As she watched the epilogue of the drama-like scene, tears unknowingly found their paths to her eyes. She found herself sympathizing with her enemy, Goto Maki. In her mind, the conversation ran through her head once more. All she was sure about were Maki liked Aya and regretted her actions and Yossie and someone else planned the entire meeting in Tsunku's office and GAM issue. Yossie…why did Yossie work with Maki and that someone else to hurt Aya and form GAM? What was their agenda in doing so? The accident and GAM did not seem to be connected in any ways. Was it because Aya did not die and manage to recover that GAM came into the picture? Or were they part of a bigger plan? The former seemed more plausible. Who would have authority over Tsunku? Wasn't Tsunku that god-like and untouchable? She looked at the girl who was kneeling down on the marble flooring once more. For the first time, she noticed that girl’s loneliness. So the jealousy she had felt all these while was planned. There was this overwhelming urge to comfort her as she felt her heart softening. Yet, her pride and ego resisted her as she remembered the open quarrels that they had in the past few months. She walked off slowly with her legs feeling as heavy as her heart.