Amnesia: CH06
A/N: This chapter is going to be a little long due to the fact I'm being a little too descriptive for this chapter. Bear with me and hope that you enjoy it! I hope it solves anyone's doubts in the story.
XXX
[Rena’s POV]
“Good afternoon Rena-chan!”
Finally, she came. It’s Jurina. She brought a bento box like usual to eat lunch with me. I never had this feeling before when I’m with Jurina alone. Right now, my heart felt like it’s going to explode. It’s pounding so fast that I thought Jurina could hear it already.
“Oh right, I got something for you.” Jurina gave a brown small file and I took a bunch of paper pictures out. It’s a picture that they took at the amusement park together. When they’re fooling around, eating together…it was my first picture I had ever since I remembered. My first solid piece of memory is together with everyone. “Hope you like it!”
“Thank you so much Jurina…” I couldn’t hide my smile and hugged the picture closed to my heart. It’s one of my precious gifts ever. “I’ll treasure this!”
“Aw! You’re just sweet Rena-chan!” Jurina patted my head and I could feel my heart beating spontaneously. I looked down hoping to not have her see my blushing face. Unfortunately she had to leave a little earlier so she only had small snacks before heading back to work.
Rena finally got time for herself in her room. She decided to go out to the roof deck of the hospital. Mayu once took me there once and it wasn’t as far from where room was. I went up there and took a deep breath of fresh air. I often came up here when Jurina and Yukirin were busy with their job. I took my time watch through the pictures back from the amusement park. There were pictures that I took with Jurina. Only the two of us…
~BADUMP. BADUMP.~
My heart was pounding clearly. I could feel it against my ribs. I remembered that moment I’m with her back then…Just staring at the picture I had with her already made me feeling uneasy like this? I really…I really did love Jurina huh?
I sighed softly as I could feel my face burning slightly. As I thought about Jurina, it made me so happy. It felt like a flower blooming inside my chest. “Jurina…”
“Eh~ Day dreaming about your crush up on the roof deck? What a typical romance drama…”
I flinched as I heard an anonymous voice coming out from nowhere. I turned to where the voice came from and I saw the same old trolling perverted doctor. “Mayu…how did you know I’m here?” Now I began to wonder she had GPS on me or something? She could find me all the time and always appeared out of nowhere whenever she wanted.
“A-Aren’t you working??”
“Isn’t it obvious? You’ll either be in your room, or up here.”
Mayu shrugged her shoulders and checked her watch. It’s around late noon and it’s her lunch break since her previous case had a longer surgery than she expected. Unfortunately she didn’t have lunch today with Yukirin due to that matter. “Well…I didn’t know you got this kind of romantic sense too?”
“W-What ever!” I roared back and I kept the picture in the bag. But before I did, she took the first picture on the pile, the picture that I was staring. It’s the picture with Jurina and I. As Mayu looked at the picture, I could see her cheesy grin across her face…Oh no I don’t have a good feeling after this.
“Ah hah~ you’re seriously ADORABLE when you’re in love~!”
“SHUT UP MAYU!!” I blushed so madly and snatched the picture back from her hand. At least she didn’t pull it away from me. I kept it back into my folder gently to not damage the picture as much as possible. She’s so mean bullying me about Jurina like that. “You’re even crazy when it comes to Yukirin! I wondered who’s far effected by love.”
“Eh~ I don’t deny that I love Yukirin.” Mayu spoke bluntly and poked my head roughly with a chuckle. Her giggle was just unpredictable, with that cyborg expression; I couldn’t tell what she’s thinking at all. I wondered what’s coming next from her. “By the way, want to go fetch some snacks down stairs? There’s a good bakery shop below the Heart Unit. So come to my office when you’re ready.”
She left immediately and didn’t allow me to say a word. “A-Are you serious…wow.” I sighed and I had no choice but to follow with her. I went back to my room, changed my clothes a little and took my bag. As I rushed out from my room, I forgot to zip my bag so my stuffs all fell onto the ground.
“Oh no…” I sighed and hurried keeping all my stuffs into the bag. Then I saw this note…Ah, it’s a paper note that Airin-san gave it to me. She told me to check it when I’m available. Now I am, I guess I should have a check before I actually forgot it again. “Hm…”
I opened the paper but…ah…what…? Wait…it’s…no no…I…I don’t get this…
-
~THUDD!!!~
I slammed the door so hard that I could see the shocking expression on Mayu’s face. She’s reading a book before I came and she almost dropped the book. She got up and walked up to me who was huffing quickly. I was running here without stopping after all…but this is serious, I HAVE to talk to Mayu now.
“W-What’s happening?” She asked me with slight worries in her tone. Maybe I never acted like this, that’s why she seemed to be concerned of me.
“Mayu…I have to talk.”
“Uh…sure? You sound really serious.”
I just sat down and felt so pale. Mayu didn’t say anything and came to my side. I showed her the paper I got from Airin. I passed it to her and Mayu picked it up. Then suddenly, I saw a wide shocked expression on her face. She might have known something…that I didn’t know…
“Rena…”
“So it’s true…isn’t it?” I got out from my seat. I felt a surge of anger and sadness struck right into my chest. I grabbed onto her coat tightly and felt like wanted to yell at Mayu as loud as I could. “You knew it!?”
“Rena calm down first--”
“WHY!? Why didn’t you tell me!?”
I shook her as hard as I could and yelled at the top of my lungs without holding back. Mayu tried to struggle against me but it’s not working. As if my adrenaline rush was giving me all this unlimited surge of power. “Yukirin knew this too right!? Everyone knew it! Why…!?”
“Rena--”
“If I knew that Jurina’s my sister then I wouldn’t fall in love with her already!!” Suddenly, I broke into tears and my knees felt weak. I kneed down onto the ground and I couldn’t hope my cry, I cried…I started to cry heavily. I was so angry at the fact that everyone was hiding this from me. But…it also hurts so badly too. “Don’t you know how I felt!? Do you even…understand this pain?”
“Rena…I’m sorry…”
Mayu crouched down and hugged me tightly. It’s the first time she hugged me. I could feel the sincere and honest from that hug, and her voice. She’s stroked my head gently and I started to cry even harder. I buried my face on her shoulder and just screamed out with pain.
“Mayu…Why…why does it have to be like this…?” I hugged Mayu even tighter. “Why is it painful like this…?”
“…I’ll tell you everything.” Mayu replied calmly to me and slowly pushed away. She rested her forehead on mine. “I’ll tell you everything…Rena.”
-
[I overheard Jurina and her friends’ conversation by accident…
She might not told you this,
but I heard that Jurina is your older sister.
She admitted herself as well…
I’m sorry if they didn’t actually tell you yet.]
…That note that Airin-san left for me. I couldn’t believe what I learned from Airin-san…this is just…I…I don’t know anymore. After Mayu started to calm me down, she told me how she actually knew to begin with that Jurina was her older sister. She wanted to tell me for so long already, but Jurina begged her not to tell me…because even we’re sisters…we’re not blood-related.
I asked Mayu…but she told me she didn’t know about that either. The first time she had that conversation about me with Jurina was the time she knew that we’re not blood related. After I compromise the story Jurina told me back at the amusement park…she moved out when she’s 18…I’m still 13 back then? She told me, when she moved to be with Yukirin and was still a first year in university…she remembered that Jurina’s surname is Matsui before she changed to Kashiwagi. Then I started to ask her…about my family.
“So…about my parents and Jurina…Uh…”
“I understand what you’re trying to ask. Unfortunately, I don’t know too…whether you or Jurina, who is related to your parents.” Mayu replied me honestly. She wasn’t lying. It meant that Jurina didn’t even tell her about it either. Why is Jurina hiding this from me? “If I find anything, I’ll tell you.”
“I see…”
“I’m sorry Rena…” Mayu sighed softly and caressed my head gently. She was worried about me…I could feel it. She’s not trolling or being sarcastic like how she usually did. “…I’m sorry.”
“Please Mayu…it’s okay…it’s okay.”
She shook her head and I could se guilty within those pair of eyes that were looking into mine. “…I shouldn’t have dragged you into my mess.”
“No, Mayu don’t blame yourself! Please…I’m the one willingly to help you out. It’s not your fault.” I gripped onto her clothes tighter to nudge her. After this sudden adrenaline rush, my grip felt so terribly weak. “I…didn’t start loving her from that last hangout…maybe, it’s since the beginning.”
“Huh?”
“I…I always had this feeling since the beginning I met her.” I tried to keep talking but I don’t know why I felt like crying. I hugged Mayu tightly so I could bury my face onto her shoulder as I forced myself to tell my true feelings that I never even mentioned before…I had this yearning feeling for Jurina ever since I met her for the very first time. It’s a very disturbing feeling in my stomach and in my chest. But I never came to understand this feeling, or either I’m suppressing this feeling for so long until it’s too overflowing. It got out of control…as I started to get close to Jurina, I started to want her more. I don’t want to admit at all, this lust and this desire feeling. I wanted to forget about it, but I couldn’t do it no matter I how much I suppressed it.
“…Maybe I love Jurina to begin with it, but never I realized it.”
“…” Mayu remained quietly without saying a word. She stroked my head gently and allowed me to cry on her coat. “I’m a single child…I never felt how it is to have a sibling at all. I was alone…all alone. My parents were just too busy with their work. They gave me everything, only but time. I really envy you and Jurina…so I…I might’ve bully you two too much because of that.”
I slowly pushed away and looked into her eyes. It was a lonely pair of eyes from her; I never saw that side from Mayu before at all. But I wondered why she’s telling me about her like this. “But after I knew you, Rena, I guess it’s my first time I really felt like…I had a younger sister. If there’s anything I could do for you…let me do it.”
I felt so touched by her. Mayu’s presence made me felt secure. However…I’m grateful that Mayu’s here beside me. When I thought about it, maybe her sarcastic did brighten me up without I realizing it? Then suddenly she pinched my cheeks and it HURTS! OW! OW! That’s too much!
“Mayooo dat hurts!!” I pulled myself away and then she started laughing at me. Jeez, at this serious speech we had she just bullied me out of a sudden! That’s just so---yeah…typical Mayu after all. “What was that for…?”
“I have something for you.” Mayu stood up and went to her shelf to get something. She came back and handed the key into my hand. Before I’m about to ask what’s this key, she explained it to me. “The room beside to mine, it’s my special hideout, whenever you felt like being alone quietly…just go there.”
“Why--”
“Just take it, Rena.”
“…Okay.” I took the key from her and kept in in my bag. Then suddenly Mayu grabbed my hand and pulled me up to stand. She didn’t say anything, grabbed her small handbag and got out from the room. “Uh…where are we going?”
“Eat obviously. I asked you to meet me here in order to go to my favorite bakery below here.” Mayu spoke bluntly and it just recalled me that it was the main purpose I had to come to her office. My mind was completely filled by stories about Airin-san’s note regarding Jurina. “There’s good melon pan as well, I checked it up already, the bills on me.”
“Oh melon pan!?” I accidently blurted out without thinking. Then it made Mayu giggled and ruffled my head roughly again. Now she’s making me felt embarrassed with myself. “…Now that’s embarrassing.”
“Hehe~ I’m glad I got your attention~” Mayu grabbed my hand and dragged me down two floors below the Heart Unit Section. Then we finally stood in front of this bakery shop.
We got in and bought melon pan and a shortcake. Mayu insisted we sit there and she even ordered drinks for herself and I. “How’s it?”
“I-It’s SO good. Just like you said!”
“I’m glad~” Mayu giggled as she kept eating her shortcake. “Sweets make your mood brightened up.”
I had another bid melon pan before I replied her. “…Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
“I AM right, it’s not just a guess!”
“Okay! Yes ma’am Dr. Watanabe…you’re right.”
“Good.” She smirked before she had a glass of her iced coffee. She didn’t say anything and kept eating the cake until strawberry was the last piece left. “If you need anything, just call me okay? I’ll ditch my case and run to you.”
“Woah! That’s a little exaggerating?”
“Whoo! You’re smart~ Yes I am.”
“Jeez Mayu…you’re such a troll.” I actually laughed out a little with her sarcastic tone in her voice. That’s just typical Mayu I knew! I guess I started to know her well enough to actually start adapted to her sarcastic character now. “Thanks for your treat.”
“No problem. At your service Re-na-chan~”
(Mayu: But…how did Airi know about this? I never knew it until Jurina told me…what was he hiding?)
-
We got back after Mayu’s break was done. Then I started walking back to my room. As I was walking, my mind was occupied about Jurina. It felt everything seemed to fit somehow. The reason Jurina gave me so much care and attention was because I’m her sister? I doubt why she didn’t tell me the truth to begin with. Just because we’re not blood related? Why…why did Jurina didn’t tell me the truth about her?
“Rena-chan.”
Suddenly a voice came from behind me and it made me flinched badly. I turned and saw Airin-san there. He smiled and walked towards me. “How are you doing?”
“A-Airin-san! Don’t surprise me like that.”
“I’ve been calling you twice already. So…did you read the note I gave you?” He finally asked me and I nodded. He sighed softly and came to pat my head gently. His face seemed to show concern or sympathy for me. “I see…I’m sorry.”
“Not at all. I’m grateful that you told me about it.”
“I just overheard it by accident and I felt like I have to tell you.” Airin-san smiled kindly to me but before she could say anything, I had to ask her something. Since she’s a doctor, she knew that Jurina’s my sister, she might know about my parents.
“Airin-san…do you know anything about my parents? Like…am I related to them?” I gathered my courage to ask her without making myself crying from reminding myself from this doubt and fear. “I know already that Jurina and I are not related…”
“I see so you knew that already…I did checked the database on that. If you wanted to know, I will look it up for you.”
“…Really?” I was shocked when Airin-san offered to search that information for me. This is something I really wanted to know! Since Jurina and others wouldn’t tell me…I have to find a way to know this no matter what. I wanted to remember everything. I have to. “Could you really do that??”
“Yeah. Not much people know…my father is one of the founders of this hospital. He’s great friends with Dr. Kashiwagi, who is nurse Yuki’s father.” His smile gave me hope. I totally believed in him. Also, I wanted to believe in him. “How about I contact you tonight about it? I actually have a day-off today, I’ll look up for you.”
“Thank you so much Airin-san…I’m in debt with you.”
“Not at all! I’m gladly to help you Rena-chan.” He suddenly hugged my gently in his arms and it caught me off guard. He even stroked my head and whispered to me softly. “I’m here for you, don’t worry. I’ll contact you again tonight okay?”
“Thank you so much Airin-san…” I was about to hug him back but suddenly a voice made him and I stumbled.
“Dr. Airin!!”
It was so loud enough that it stumbled me. It made both Airin and I pushed each other away from that surprise. I turned to where the voice came from and there were Yukirin and…Jurina there saw us.
“J-Jurina…?”
“Ah, it’s Dr. Jurina and Nurse Kashiwagi.” He remained his composure and had this bright smile across his face. “Is there something a matter?”
“…I thought you’re on a day-off.” Jurina spoke with a blunt voice. Even I saw that gentle innocent smile on her face. I actually stumbled by the tone from her voice. She actually sound irritated to me.
“I believe there shouldn’t be a reason to here Dr. Jurina.”
Airin-san replied with slight sarcastic. I started to feel the tension in the atmosphere rose up as the conversation kept going on…I don’t feel good about it. “My father is one of the founders after all.”
I could feel the scary aura emitted from both Jurina and Airin-san. Then she came and grabbed my arm. “I’m sorry to interrupt, Rena-chan needed to go through treatment now.”
“Ah~ I see, then pardon my leave.” He replied and patted my head before he left with an angelic smile. Airin-san’s smile made me felt a little relieved.
However, Jurina’s grip was getting tighter and tighter. I flinched as I’m getting to hurt. “J-Jurina…?”
“Oh…” She suddenly let go of my arm and had an apologetic face on her. I started to wonder that Jurina and Airin-san didn’t seem to go along well. But when I talked about her in front of Airin-san, he seemed to be okay with it. I might not be a good idea to ask Jurina, so I think I should ask Yukirin about it…Wait, did Jurina said about treatment? What treatment?
“Uh Jurina? What do you mean by…treatment just now?”
“Well…I’m sorry it’s a little sudden, but we wanted to try a new theory for amnesia treatment.” Jurina chuckled wryly and her usual face came back. I felt relieved that her usual smiling face is back. I love that expression from her. I nodded and then I followed Jurina and Yukirin down the corridor of the hospital.
-
I didn’t know where we were heading at all. Then suddenly we entered this white room that had a small round table in the middle with about 5-6 chairs around. We all entered, then Jurina asked me to sit down with Yukirin and her sitting opposite from me.
“Eh…so what are we doing?”
“Before we start anything…I wanted to talk to you about the previous treatment.” Jurina started to speak seriously and it made me a little tensed up. She started telling me how there’s a possibility that I couldn’t remember due to the fear of remembering the tragic from the accident. No treatment could work with me if I’m afraid to remember it. Basically…whether I’m going to remember or not depends on my decision. Jurina put in a very simple language so that I could understand what happened. She told me, when I started to remember about my past, I suddenly got insane and started screaming hysterically. I-I didn’t remember that at all! As I tried to remember my memories again, I might go berserk again.
“I see…so…what do you think I should do?” I asked and then Jurina gave me a notebook and a pen. “A book…?”
“The best to remember everything quickly is for you to write it out. Just like writing a story.” Jurina started to explain to me that by writing it out like a story, it would help me figure out what actually happened after from the last point I remember. Also, it could trigger me to remembering other thing else too. “This is actually an idea that Yukirin and I personally discussed, write it down when you have a chance to do so.”
“I see…thank you.”
I actually forced myself not to tell Jurina that I knew she’s my…not blood-related sister. However, if Jurina is not planning to tell me, I will find it out everything myself, and why she didn’t tell me. That’s what I decided to do from now…I guess that would be the first thing I would write in my diary.
~BEEP. BEEP.~
Jurina’s pager rung suddenly out of blue and she was called down to the emergency room since there was a case coming from an accident. She’s forced to leave. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stay any longer…”
“Don’t worry! Leave it to me Jurina.” Yukirin spoke in a cheering tone and it made Jurina laughed before she left. Then suddenly Jurina rubbed Yukirin’s head roughly, made her moved away and glared at Jurina with her exaggerated reaction. “What was that for!? Go!”
“Now you’re chasing me away? That’s nice. I’ll see you later Rena-chan.” Jurina hurried out from the room and now it’s only between Yukirin and I. Now I started to wonder what are we going to do now…
“Alright! I guess we should start then…” Yukirin gave me a pile of cards to me as each contained a picture of an object, place, animal, people, and events. I wondered what she wanted me to do with it. Eh…I should stop questioning before Yukirin start explaining about the purpose of these cards. “These cards could help you remember your lost memories. If you do remember anything…writing would do.”
“I got it, so…we’re doing this flashcards now?” I asked Yukirin, but she shook her head instead. Which made me a more confused.
“The flashcards and the diary would be outside the treatment time. Today…if you don’t mind, we’re going to try the talk again like last time.” Yukirin moved in closer to sit beside me instead and then we turned towards each other. I knew what she meant, we’re going to try to remember again by conversation and only could hope that I don’t traumatized about the car accident. “So…did you remember anything else aside from the dream you had?”
“…I remember living alone with my parents through out my high school, I hangout with my friends back…in Nagoya.” I remembered the name of the place I came from, I really did start to remember little minor things, bit by bit…however, this unknown irritating feeling in my guts still remained there. Something doesn’t feel right, as if there was still a missing piece. “I love my hometown, my friends are there, but…I felt lonely.”
“Lonely?”
“The house, inside my house, there’s my father, mother, my dog Ruby…but still it felt hollow…”
As I keep speaking out, I started to understand a little bit more about myself. Everything started to compromise, maybe the reason I had this hollow feeling about home because Jurina isn’t there. She’s not there, back when I’m a teenager, a high schooler. Everything made sense…Jurina left right after she graduated, back then I was 13…I started to remember a little bit by bit, it’s like rewinding my memories back since from that accident….
-
We had gone through several questions and I started to remember more things after the conversation. Also, I’m forcing myself to not remind of the tragic accident or else I would go crazy again.
Oh right, maybe this is about time I ask Yukirin about Jurina’s relationship with Airin-san. “Eh…Yukirin, do you mind me asking something?”
“Yeah?”
“What’s a relationship between Airin-san and Jurina? They seemed to be…” Before I even could finish my sentence, Yukirin understood my point immediately. She really did know what’s going on between both of them.
“There’s a long story behind both of them…”
Yukirin continued explaining to me. Airin-san attended the same university as Mayu, Jurina and her; he’s their senior. Also, he’s the first candidate to be the head of ER department, but then Jurina had that position instead due to her talents. Many things happened and they couldn’t go along well that much in terms of relationship. If it were not related to patients, they would never go along well at all. “So that’s how it is.”
“Ah…No wonder the atmosphere seems a little tensed.”
“But…how did you know Dr. Airi?”
“I met him by coincidence when I’m going to go see Mayu. He showed me the way to her office.”
“I see…” Yukirin trailed off her speech and it made me wondered. It seemed a little suspicious, it was like she wanted to say something but she forced herself not to. I didn’t bother to ask anything from her…I don’t feel like it.
-
Finally the treatment session was over. Yukirin escorted me back to my room before she had to go back to her position if there’s nothing I needed. Now that I had my own time, I looked at the flashcards that she gave me. The objects, sceneries, and animals…they’re all familiar to me. I stumbled upon a picture, which was scenery in Nagoya.
I’ve been there before, it’s Sunshine Sakae.
“…I started to have a feeling that they knew I came from Nagoya to begin with.” I placed the card down and picked up the book. “Well…I guess it’s from my medical profile. Maybe I’m thinking too much.”
I started scribbling things onto the book. I wrote how I felt onto the book. About Jurina, Mayu, Yukirin, Airin-san…everyone I could think of. Also, even about this doubt I started to have for Jurina and Yukirin…and my feelings for her.
[I wondered I could trust Yukirin and Jurina now. I know they’re really kind and care for me, but they’re hiding this huge secret behind me. I don’t blame Mayu for not knowing it but… This mixed feeling I have for Jurina is just killing me.
…I started to doubt in her but…my feelings for her is….]My pen stopped as the pain throbbed inside my chest. I sighed and stopped thinking about it before it’s starting to get into me too much. I glanced at the clock in my room, it was already 6pm. I didn’t know it was this late already! The treatment session thing did really took my time…
~RING! RING!~
My cell phone vibrated. I received a message? I checked it and it was from Airin-san. Wait did he found out about my parents already? That was so fast! I immediately checked the content inside the text with nervousness.
[I had something to tell you regarding your parents, when could I come in?]I texted him back that he could come in now. I only did just wait about few minutes before he actually arrived. That was fast! I guess he must be close by to my room, he also carried some sort of paper file with him too.
“Good evening Rena-chan. How’s your day?”
“It’s good. So…what did you know about my parents?” I went straight to the main point before anything else. I’m just too desperate to learn the truth. He nodded softly before started explaining to me about…literally everything.
“So…Am I?”
“They are your biological parents. Jurina is high likely to be an adopted one, there’s not much data to confirm that.” He sat down on the couch as well as inviting me to sit down beside him. He continued to talk without me interrupting him.
“Actually…I just knew that the doctor that was on your parents’ case was actually Jurina herself.”
“W-What? Really?? But that's impossible.” I remembered Jurina told me before that she’s with Mayu and Yukirin when they’re trying to save me from the injuries. The accident happened at same time…it’s not possible.
“However…”
XXX
I heard clearly word by word from Airin-san. I sounded unrealistic, but it was the truth. I don’t know whether I interpret what he said properly or not but…from what Airin-san, Jurina never make a mistake or failed to fix her patient yet….
…But she for the very first time she failed…was our parents’ case.
After what Airin-san told me. I don’t feel like meeting anyone at all. I want to be alone. I want to be alone…He had left as I asked him. He's just so kind to me. I'm so happy to meet someone so kind like Airin-san.
~CLING!~
I heard a soft cling sound, it was a key…the same key that Mayu gave me. Right, she told me, whenever I felt like being alone, I should go there. That's when I decided to go to that mysterious room beside Mayu’s office. I plunged in the key twisted it and unlocked the door. As I entered, what I saw was a plain simple room with a tatami mat, low small table, and shelves filled with books. It was a simple room, yet you could feel really…quiet in here.
“So this is what she meant…” I sat down on the floor as thoughts about Jurina rushed into my head. I cried. I started crying. Tears of mixed feelings for her, I love but I doubt in her. I couldn’t understand what Jurina was thinking. I wondered what she saw me as…likely, as a younger sister for sure. That’s why she cared so much of me. The more I thought about that, I wanted to cry.
…So I cried all alone in that silent room. No one knew…why am I crying.
-
-
~TBA~
Topic: AMNESIA: Chapter 14 ~ [WMatsui + MaYuki]~ (18/12/2015) (Read 111421 times)