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Offline Mikan

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« Reply #20 on: December 10, 2006, 09:20:28 AM »
Ex Morning Musume member, Yasuda Kei has been reported missing for over two weeks now. But an anonymous tip recieved by police a little after 1 pm this afternoon led them to her whereabouts.

Ms Yasuda was found in Tokyo Disney Land disguised as Mini Mouse. On sighting the SWAT team she fled but was quickly taken down as the novelty suit impaired her running abilities. She was taken away screaming, quote: "I just wanted to be loved"

Her parents had this to say in her defense. "Who?"


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Come on, give it a shot...you know u want too

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Offline Tanachan

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« Reply #21 on: December 10, 2006, 09:49:04 PM »
This just in, apparently Ms. Yasuda Kei's parents are NOT her real parents. After a long search, and a few rounds of cake, she found her real parents. They had this to say -

"Who are you again?"
If Helen Keller falls in the woods and no one is around, does she make a sound?

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Offline JFC

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« Reply #22 on: December 10, 2006, 10:10:06 PM »
^ Dayum those are so bad/mean, and yet hilarious! XD XD XD

JPH!P :heart:'s Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline Mikan

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« Reply #23 on: December 11, 2006, 01:43:03 PM »
Tsunku new promotion has the nation watching as he does a retake on the 40famine. The girls who volunteered were assigned a challenge they must stick to for 40 hours in the name of charity.

Miki gave up body contact (including sexual contact of herself)
Sayumi gave up singing (this so far has grossed the most money)
Eri accompanied by Ishikawa were put into dance classes
Kago was challenged to grow up and speak like an adult.
Nono was restricted to speaking only english
Yossui was locked in a room with food, her task being to finally eat something
Yaguchi enthusiastically volunteered, her challenge being to sit still

Headlines will be watching and reporting any updates on this event

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Im sorry, this thread has become my punching bag ^^

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Tokyo Theatres annouced the acceptance of Iida Kaori from Morning Musume into their company. The idol is expected to feature in an 'important role' for the companies up coming performance - The Lion King. The director was kind enough to tell us this after her audition -

"She's good. She's perfect. Just what we have been looking for! Do you know how many basketball teams we searched threw looking for someone like her?"

Although the director, Mr Kawasaki, wouldnt say exactly what part Iida is schelduled to play it's rumoured she will be the Giraffe that appears in the opening act.

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^ That last one was inspired by a Kaorin disliker. I read there speil I while ago and they mentioned she looked stupid because she was too tall. I cant remember clearly but Im fairly sure they discribed her as a Giraffe.. So to who ever you are...this if for you~
PS I have nothing against these girls!! Im just a jerk
« Last Edit: December 12, 2006, 06:32:00 PM by Mikan »

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Offline rndmnwierd

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« Reply #24 on: December 11, 2006, 09:27:26 PM »
Quote from: Mikan;255982

Nono and Yossui were locked in a room with food, their task being to finally eat something



Okay, now Hitomi "The Stick" Yoshizawa I can understand, but Nono needing to eat more? That girl actually has a pretty nice weight and she doesn't sway in a strong wind. In fact, she could probably stand a few weeks at the gym.

Offline JFC

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« Reply #25 on: December 12, 2006, 06:24:46 AM »
Quote from: Mikan;255982
Sayumi gave up singing (this so far has grossed the most money)
For a real challenge Sayu should have to give up doing the "Usa-chan PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE" and/or NOT look at herself in a mirror for 40 hours.

:ROTFLMAO:

JPH!P :heart:'s Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline Mikan

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« Reply #26 on: December 12, 2006, 12:25:53 PM »
I new a Nono bashing would cause a few ruffled feathers. I was just playing around. When I see her I think that she could use some R&R. Dancing works a lot of muscles so maybe she just needs time to rest and let those muscles grow~

Sorry rndmn if I went to far

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Offline rndmnwierd

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« Reply #27 on: December 12, 2006, 04:02:46 PM »
Quote from: Mikan;256665
I new a Nono bashing would cause a few ruffled feathers. I was just playing around. When I see her I think that she could use some R&R. Dancing works a lot of muscles so maybe she just needs time to rest and let those muscles grow~

Sorry rndmn if I went to far


No, it's cool. You should have said something more like:

Quote
Nono was challenged to speak completely in English. (And no one could understand her anymore than usual.)


Or something like that. :D I just meant that her needing to eat more was strange.

Offline Mikan

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« Reply #28 on: December 12, 2006, 06:30:31 PM »
Lol. Yeah thats hell better than what I origanally had *edits*
Dude, please write a report. I wanna see what you got :D

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Loser87

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« Reply #29 on: December 17, 2006, 01:28:38 AM »
* bump bump bump *

Ahem, on today's top news! A brutal murder has happened at keio University!
The Murdered body of a 42-year-old man who was not a professor at all
His body has been stabbed several times with a fork that had remnants of cake on it
There is no word on who the murderer is but a message was left pinned to the dead body.
"STOP STALKING ME!! Merry Christmas ^__^"

On other news Tsuji Nozomi Former Morning Musume Member has visited America for the first time that isn't Hawaii!
She was spotted in L.A. visiting fellow ex mini moni member Mika Todd!
It was reported she managed to speak one full sentence in English that she claims Mika has taught her.
" Hello, How are you? F*****? wow that's great!"

Mika had this to say:
".....that's just F***** up..."

End of our coverage tonight.

Offline Mikan

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« Reply #30 on: December 17, 2006, 10:43:17 AM »
HAHAHAHAHAAHAH~
Yeah I think Tsuji could learn some English as long as they taught her something USEFUL!

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Offline glcorps2002

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« Reply #31 on: December 17, 2006, 10:51:12 AM »
Quote from: Mikan;261024
HAHAHAHAHAAHAH~
Yeah I think Tsuji could learn some English as long as they taught her something USEFUL!
That is useful. You never know when you need to shout F*****!!! to someone, might save someone's life. Probably the guy your shouting at if he has enough sense to run.

Offline Tanachan

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« Reply #32 on: December 17, 2006, 03:56:32 PM »
That just made my day cheesecake girl!
If Helen Keller falls in the woods and no one is around, does she make a sound?

Official [WHOA] member, master and commander of the Tokunaga Chinami branch.

Offline rndmnwierd

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« Reply #33 on: December 18, 2006, 07:52:57 AM »
Tsuji Nozomi was arrested today at a local Putt Putt for vandalism and assault. Reportedly, the manager had asked her to stop abusing store property when the candy crane game wouldn't yeild the candy she wanted. At one point, Tsuji picked up a nearby stool and bashed in the glass of the machine, turning on the manager when he tried to restrain her and breaking his arm.

As the police dragged her away, Tsuji could be heard screaming, "My Tootsie Rolls! I want my Tootsie Rolls!"

It is not known whether she was under the influence of any substances, though one bystander suggested that maybe it was sugar deficiency instead.

We shall keep you updated as this story unfolds.


BTW: Putt Putt is an arcade and mini golf place thing that I went to tonight and got over a thousand freaking tickets, baby! Whoo! Ahem, and Tootsie Rolls are extremely addictive tiny chocolate log (or roll!) shaped things. And I go crazy for the stupid things...

Offline Mikan

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« Reply #34 on: December 21, 2006, 03:01:00 AM »
Ive always wanted to know what a tootsie roll is...we dont have em over here :D
AND I LOVE PUTT PUTT!!!

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Offline Mikan

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« Reply #35 on: December 24, 2006, 12:56:27 PM »
Aramaki Mikan here LIVE at the Down town Tokyo police station as the city police go over evidence found in Yaguchi Mari's apparently. The idol was reported missing 3 days ago and after storming her apartment late last night Detectives found a letter addressed 'to whom it may concern'. The letter reads as follows:

To whom it may concern,

I have had to leave Japan immediately and return to my hometown due to an emergancy call from my previous employer. He is incredibly understaffed this year and requests my assistance. I shall stay there until I am no longer needed but I can guess that this may be some time around the 7th of January.

Peace out!
Yagu <3

PS
Kei-chan, if you're wanting to stay over you are more than welcome just make sure you feed Mr. Winky and put the toilet seat down when your done. Im sick of shutting it
.

Tsunku is being questioned on where exactly he found this idol and why there are no records of her history before joining the Hello!Project.

More on this as it happens.
Im Aramaki Mikan.

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Offline glcorps2002

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« Reply #36 on: December 24, 2006, 09:49:36 PM »
Quote from: Mikan;266477
Aramaki Mikan here LIVE at the Down town Tokyo police station as the city police go over evidence found in Yaguchi Mari's apparently. The idol was reported missing 3 days ago and after storming her apartment late last night Detectives found a letter addressed 'to whom it may concern'. The letter reads as follows:
 
To whom it may concern,
 
I have had to leave Japan immediately and return to my hometown due to an emergancy call from my previous employer. He is incredibly understaffed this year and requests my assistance. I shall stay there until I am no longer needed but I can guess that this may be some time around the 7th of January.
 
Peace out!
Yagu <3
 
PS
Kei-chan, if you're wanting to stay over you are more than welcome just make sure you feed Mr. Winky and put the toilet seat down when your done. Im sick of shutting it.
 
Tsunku is being questioned on where exactly he found this idol and why there are no records of her history before joining the Hello!Project.
 
More on this as it happens.
Im Aramaki Mikan.
Santa's hottest little helper, ha ha ha.

Offline Tanachan

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« Reply #37 on: December 25, 2006, 01:38:05 AM »
Whoo~!

This will end up being great as soon as some other good writers break into it like Yuuyami and Shoko, etc.

And I like the subliminal joke w/ Kei-chan!
« Last Edit: December 25, 2006, 01:41:01 AM by Tanachan »
If Helen Keller falls in the woods and no one is around, does she make a sound?

Official [WHOA] member, master and commander of the Tokunaga Chinami branch.

Offline Yuuyami

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« Reply #38 on: December 25, 2006, 01:40:59 AM »
Hey. Don't put the pressure on me XD

Sorry, but you won't see any headlines from me any time soon. Maybe when I feel like I'm creative enough, I'll contribute XD

Offline Tanachan

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« Reply #39 on: January 15, 2007, 02:12:36 AM »
Good evening fellow HiPsters! Tanachan here to revive the thread of...


HEADLINES!!!!!

This week a car was stolen outside of the Hotel de Plot Contrivance. It was describes as an all pink car, with the word "GAM" written along the side in thin, yellow font. The alarm on the car is the song "Melodies", the headlights project a custom image of Miki drinking Juice in a white shirt and miniskirt, and has a vanity liscence plate with the word "THANKS". The co owner of the hotel, Ayaka Kimura, is expectant of the car being stolen by one Matsuura Aya, as the board left in its place had thousands of Ayaya stickers on it, and had the melody of "GOOD BYE NATSUO" reminating from a built in speaker.

More to come, I'm Tanachan.

This one is dedicated to Commie and Fen!
« Last Edit: January 15, 2007, 05:30:34 AM by Tanachan »
If Helen Keller falls in the woods and no one is around, does she make a sound?

Official [WHOA] member, master and commander of the Tokunaga Chinami branch.

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