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Author Topic: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Chapter Forty-Six -- Nightmare]  (Read 64362 times)

Offline FeverInducedMadness

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::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Chapter Forty-Six -- Nightmare]
« on: April 05, 2007, 03:08:44 AM »
I decided to take a little break from VoA today to start work on one of two new fanfics that I'll be working on alongside the first so that I won't get bored, or if I get blocked on one, I can fall back on the others. I'm not really sure where this story's idea really sprung from (I think it was because I fell asleep listening to the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack one night. XD) and though the title's somewhat weird, I think it fits. This is not going to be as dark as VoA. In fact, there will be very little angst at all and a lot of romance and humor and fluffy things. (ROFFLE, I LIED. XDD) It puts the spotlight on the members of Berryz Koubou (Don't worry, those of you who voted for the Reina fic in the poll, you'll be getting it, I promise. I'm itching to work on that as well. :3) and is situated in an alternate universe and has nothing to do with Hello! Project. Or sci-fi. XD

This is just the prologue. I'll see how you guys respond to determine if I continue. Also, I'm trying something new, writing in first-person like this. It's kind of weird, but it's a little easier...

So um, enjoy! ^w^

::Heartbeat Tempo::

[::Table of Contents::]

--Sunday, The Day Before--

Prologue – The Train [You Are Here]

--Monday, Day One--

Chapter One – Magic Tricks
Chapter Two – Dancing, Singing, Exciting! …Not.
Chapter Three – T Stands for Trouble
Chapter Four – Decided
Chapter Five – This Place is Crazy
Chapter Six – No Turning Back

--Tuesday, Day Two--

Chapter Seven – Nice to Meet You, Too
Chapter Eight – When Fate Caught Up to Us
Chapter Nine – Dance With Me
Chapter Ten – Disaster Strikes Again
Chapter Eleven – It’s a Shot in the Dark, But…
Chapter Twelve – The Breaking Point
Chapter Thirteen – Some Partner in Crime You Are

--Wednesday, Day Three--

Chapter Fourteen – Secrets for Breakfast
Chapter Fifteen – We’re the Good Kind of Crazy
Chapter Sixteen – Surprise…?
Chapter Seventeen – It’s in Our Blood
Chapter Eighteen – Let’s Pick Up the Pieces
Chapter Nineteen – We Aren’t That Different, You and I
Chapter Twenty – Take a Chance With Me
Chapter Twenty-One – Confused, But Happy

--Thursday, Day Four--

Chapter Twenty-Two – Guess Who’s Back?
Chapter Twenty-Three – Finally Getting Something Done…
Chapter Twenty-Four – The Date
Chapter Twenty-Five – Phantom of the Theatre?
Chapter Twenty-Six – Love Notes, Dancing, and Roses

--Friday, Day Five--

Chapter Twenty-Seven – Duet
Chapter Twenty-Eight – Persuasive Negotiation
Chapter Twenty-Nine – Restless Calm
Chapter Thirty – Elementary, My Dear Watson
Chapter Thirty-One – Be Still My Heart
Chapter Thirty-Two – When Evil Intentions Get Worse…
Chapter Thirty-Three – Two Can Play That Game

--Saturday, Day Six--

Chapter Thirty-Four – Koi no Vacance, Part I
Chapter Thirty-Five – Koi no Vacance, Part II
Chapter Thirty-Six – Koi no Vacance, Part III
Chapter Thirty-Seven – Koi no Vacance, Part IV

--Sunday, Day Seven--

Chapter Thirty-Eight – Watch Your Back
Chapter Thirty-Nine – Manipulation
Chapter Forty – Reward
Chapter Forty-One – Unexpected Kindness
Chapter Forty-Two – Bond
Chapter Forty-Three – Just Looking Out For You
Chapter Forty-Four – Moonlit Alliance

--Monday, Day Eight (Current Day)--

Chapter Forty-Four – Distorted Sense of Justice

[Prologue -- The Train]

When it all came down to it really…
We were just eight ordinary people, brought together by chance…
…the dancer…
…the outsider…
…the broken one…
…the rebel…
…the prodigy…
…the flirt..
…the musician…
…and the one that started it all.
But when our paths crossed…
…our lives changed forever.


------------

I hate trains.

There’s just something about the way that they rattle about and hiss and screech that’s so terribly annoying. And yet… here I am, on a train, sitting next to people that I don’t know, waiting to reach my destination. That’s another thing I don’t like: people. They’re loud and obnoxious and they get all up in my personal bubble.

I’m not a city girl. I live in a quiet place where you’ve got some elbow room, and there isn’t much going on. But I like that. It’s nice, and not at all stressful. Besides, I’m a bit of a homebody anyway, so it doesn’t bother me.

But somehow I got tricked into getting on this train.

I don’t really understand it. How does someone manage to interpret ‘no’ as ‘yes’? I distinctly remember telling her very firmly that I didn’t want to come. So how did I end up here, on this godforsaken machine?

It’s all my cousin’s fault really. Called me up the other day and said: “Oh, Momoko-chan, you haven’t come to visit in FOREVER… Why don’t you come down here for a couple of weeks? I want you to come and watch me perform…”

I sighed as I listened to her voice on the other side of the phone, imagining that that natural pout on her lips was growing more pitiful, because she anticipated my reply before I could even get it out.

“You need to get out for a while. See some new places, meet some new people. I shudder every time I think about you in that house of yours with nothing but your books and your writing… It’s not healthy, keeping yourself holed up like that.”

I wanted to argue with her at this point. I wanted to tell her that I was perfectly healthy because I ate right and I exercised everyday, and that I would have been glad to give her my doctor’s number if she wanted to check it out herself, but I figured that it was useless. I had tried before, and didn’t really want to waste my breath. And I knew that she was only saying what she was saying because she cared and because somewhere along the way she had gotten it in her head that I actually liked being social and whatnot.

Unfortunately, she decided to take my silence and interpret it as confirmation that I would indeed be visiting.

“Well, anyway, this is going to be so much fun, I just know it. I’ll get everything ready so that you can come and stay with me. I’ll send your train tickets in the mail. Love you~!”

And that was that. The phone clicked off after that, and I was standing there in the silence, trying to process it all. I don’t think I moved until a few days later, when the mail came in, and the tickets slid out into my hand. My brain still hadn’t reconnected, because somehow my body had moved to pack enough things for the trip and the stay, but I don’t remember doing any of that.

I don’t remember how I got down to the train station, either, but I did, and once I realized it I couldn’t very well just turn around and go home.

So that’s how I ended up where I am right now.

Oh, and by the way, I think I’m beginning to get a slight case of motion sickness. I just hope that it passes before my stomach decides to empty my lunch all over the little boy sitting across from me in the compartment. Not that I would mind, really. He’s been whiny and annoying for the past half hour.

You’re probably laughing at me right now. You probably think it’s ridiculous for a person to be so against traveling and visiting family members, don’t you? Well, it’s only because you don’t fully understand my situation.

See, Risako (That’s my cousin.) and I live in two totally different worlds. While mine is peaceful and quiet, hers is alive and busy and perpetually moving. Her life revolves around the stage, putting her heart and soul into her voice and dancing so that she can impress, awe, and inspire those who come to see her perform.

It’s something to be admired, I suppose.

But I left that world a long time ago.

And even though I’m only visiting—only going back because of her—I still have doubts about this little trip. My mother always used to tell me that once you left the stage, you could never really go back, but it would never really stop being a part of you, either.

I wonder if I ever was really there in the first place.

It’s supposed to be in my blood, like Risako.

Maybe I missed something important all those years ago… maybe I just didn’t get it. Maybe that’s why I’m not fit for the life she leads.

But then why… deep down inside…

Why am I so excited?
« Last Edit: September 20, 2007, 12:16:01 PM by FeverInducedMadness »
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Offline rndmnwierd

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #1 on: April 05, 2007, 04:00:49 AM »
Quote
Why am I so excited?

I know, 'cause it's a new story!

Offline ziggurat

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #2 on: April 05, 2007, 06:05:11 AM »
Ah, I miss this new fic when refreshing. After reading the prologue (at first I use interlude, I wonder what my mind is thinking) , I like how you made momo related to risako as a cousin :D

Love momo monologue. Please continue this! (of course, I'm one of the reader that vote for this, so I want you to continue! :D)

Berryz Koubou, Ikuzee!

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Loser87

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #3 on: April 05, 2007, 07:59:39 AM »
kukukukukuku....*_*
So, you decided to go off and do a new story eh!?

WHO SAID YOU CAN START A NEW STORY WITHOUT WARNING ME!! *throws a very heavy tire at you, its kinda filthy too*
>_>.....but, its berryz...and it's new...and its shiny and sparkly (it kinda makes me jealous because I never sparkle and I'm never shiny)
So you best be updating often unless....you like being attacked by radioactive puppies! (I've ran out of radioactive kitties)

Not so much scolding today because I am sleepy and exhausted so you shall be spared today....
And because I am listening to such a happy, techno-y, up-beat, lovey dovey song I'll give you an apple (No sweets Today! You'll get cavaties!)

Must be quoted

Quote
…the dancer…
…the outsider…
…the broken one…
…the rebel…
…the prodigy…
…the flirt..
…the musician…
…and the one that started it all.

hmmmm...this made me think who is who...87% of me says the outsider is Maiha...50% of the flirt goes to Miya but the other 50% says that miya could be the prodigy...
Damn you for making my brain work at this late of hour!! DAMN YOU!!...
I'll scold you when I have more energy.. T_T;;...

Until then, WORK FASTER, POST NEW CHAPTERS!! YAH!! YAH!!! MUSH!!! MUSH!!!
*Throws some film, retainers, rubberband balls at you*
>=3
p.s. = good job >_>....

Offline lil_hamz

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #4 on: April 05, 2007, 04:56:57 PM »
Miya kinda fits the dancer too? Man why does she fit everything?  :D
I wonder who's the broken one. Sounds so sad. From reading the prologue, it seems Momo was a performer too but gave it up? Am I right or did my lousy brain misunderstand something ???
So glad for this fic, especially since it starts off with Momo  :heart:

Offline FeverInducedMadness

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #5 on: April 05, 2007, 09:17:21 PM »
I know, 'cause it's a new story!

Lol, I think that's just why YOU'RE excited. X3

Ah, I miss this new fic when refreshing. After reading the prologue (at first I use interlude, I wonder what my mind is thinking) , I like how you made momo related to risako as a cousin :D

Love momo monologue. Please continue this! (of course, I'm one of the reader that vote for this, so I want you to continue! :D)

Berryz Koubou, Ikuzee!

Lol, probably thinking interlude cuz I used that recently for VoA. And I figured that if Momoko were to be related to anyone, it would only be fitting for that person to be Risako, because they act kind of like sisters or something already anyway.

Glad you like. Because the whole story is from her point of view. :D

kukukukukuku....*_*
So, you decided to go off and do a new story eh!?

WHO SAID YOU CAN START A NEW STORY WITHOUT WARNING ME!! *throws a very heavy tire at you, its kinda filthy too*
>_>.....but, its berryz...and it's new...and its shiny and sparkly (it kinda makes me jealous because I never sparkle and I'm never shiny)
So you best be updating often unless....you like being attacked by radioactive puppies! (I've ran out of radioactive kitties)

Not so much scolding today because I am sleepy and exhausted so you shall be spared today....
And because I am listening to such a happy, techno-y, up-beat, lovey dovey song I'll give you an apple (No sweets Today! You'll get cavaties!)

Must be quoted

hmmmm...this made me think who is who...87% of me says the outsider is Maiha...50% of the flirt goes to Miya but the other 50% says that miya could be the prodigy...
Damn you for making my brain work at this late of hour!! DAMN YOU!!...
I'll scold you when I have more energy.. T_T;;...

Until then, WORK FASTER, POST NEW CHAPTERS!! YAH!! YAH!!! MUSH!!! MUSH!!!
*Throws some film, retainers, rubberband balls at you*
>=3
p.s. = good job >_>....

o_o -flails- Ididn'tknowIhadtoI'msosorrymaster! -pegged with tire- @w@
-shrinks- Nonopuppiesplease...

-cautiously reaches out for apple- >w<

Unfortunately, that 87% of you is wrong. X3
-glad that exhaustion is keeping you from scolding me- XD

-goes back to slaving-

Miya kinda fits the dancer too? Man why does she fit everything?  :D
I wonder who's the broken one. Sounds so sad. From reading the prologue, it seems Momo was a performer too but gave it up? Am I right or did my lousy brain misunderstand something ???
So glad for this fic, especially since it starts off with Momo  :heart:

There are so many facets of Miyabi's personality... ho hum. XD Out of the three things that you and Loser87 have listed (dancer, flirt, prodigy) one of them is right.
You're right about Momoko, though. <3 Good job.
And it will continue and end with her, too.
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Offline Rick-e

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #6 on: April 06, 2007, 02:40:07 AM »
ooh new fic! and it's about berryz! in an alternate universe!!!   :)

I like the intro, and since it's in first person it feels more... personal? anyways it has a nice feel.

is momoko the broken one? or the outsider? I'm thinking she might be one of the two :p

Gaki-san 大好き!

Offline FeverInducedMadness

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #7 on: April 06, 2007, 03:03:20 AM »
ooh new fic! and it's about berryz! in an alternate universe!!!   :)

I like the intro, and since it's in first person it feels more... personal? anyways it has a nice feel.

is momoko the broken one? or the outsider? I'm thinking she might be one of the two :p

Indeed! What combination could be better? <3

Yeah, I thought so too. It's easier to put yourself in the main character's place. :3

She is. ^w^

(New chapter coming in a few minutes...)
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Offline FeverInducedMadness

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #8 on: April 06, 2007, 03:22:13 AM »
I'm sort of taking my time with Chapter Seventeen of VoA right now, because it's rather important and I don't want to do a crappy job on it. So in order to keep all of you occupied while I gather my thoughts for that, here's another chapter for this story. It's much easier to write, for some reason.

(Though, I think I may have changed from present to past tense. Oh well. The prologue is allowed to be different. XD)

Enjoy.

[Chapter One -- Magic Tricks]

I had forgotten just how polluted cities were. As soon as I stepped off of the train, a gust of foul-smelling, smoke-choked air hit me in the face that made my eyes water and caused me to break out into a coughing fit.

It was horrible.

I was used to breathing in fresh, clean air, not the stale stuff that floated all around me. Unfortunately, I had to get used to it. For the next two weeks, I was stuck. I dreaded the thought, because I wasn’t sure if this was going to go well or not. I was uneasy and apprehensive, and I couldn’t decide whether or not to move, which was all well and good, because I realized at that point that I didn’t know where to go.

I had just assumed that Risako would meet me at the station. After all, if she didn’t, how on earth would I find my way around?

But the train had arrived at the station early, and so if she WAS going to meet me there, I was early. I stopped dragging my bag along behind me for a moment in order to gaze about at my surroundings.

People swarmed through the streets like a sea of insects, everybody rushing about with his or her own agenda, completely unconcerned about what was going on around them. Cars occasionally weaved in and out of this mass, their horns blaring whenever an aimless pedestrian strayed into their paths. Exhaust billowed out of the vehicles like wispy, flying snakes, and I made the connection as to why the air was so contaminated.

Normally, all of the hustle and bustle would have startled me, but there was a sort of rhythm to the noises that the city was making that it was almost sort of energizing to hear.

My eyes wandered farther, until I spotted a mass of people standing still, circled around a small, makeshift wooden platform, on top of which stood a boyish-looking girl with short messy hair and very tanned skin. I couldn’t tell what it was she was doing that had her audience so captivated, so out of curiousity, I decided to go over and get a better look.

I should inform you that I’m not very tall, and so it wasn’t until after I managed to squeeze my way near the front of the crowd that I actually saw anything.

The girl had this wild, crazed look in her eyes, like a rabid dog—only she wasn’t foaming at the mouth—and she and her clothing both appeared to be rather worn and dirty. Her hands were moving swiftly, fluidly, manipulating what appeared to be a single silver coin. She never said a word, but somehow the audience was completely transfixed by what she was doing, and I couldn’t help but stand there and watch as well.

In a matter of minutes, I saw the one coin multiply into three, and these she began to juggle in a rather comedic fashion. I don’t really know how she managed to do it, really, but by some form of slight of hand, more coins were being tossed into the air until she was juggling at least ten or twenty of them all at once.

The people around me began to let out appreciative ooh’s and aah’s at this display, and the girl only responded by letting a crooked sort of grin etch its way onto her face. Finally, she caught all of the money in one hand, clapping it together between her two palms.

When she opened her hands again, there was but the single coin that remained.

I clapped along with the other onlookers, and watched as the magician bent down to give the coin to a small child that had been viewing the entire performance with eyes as wide as saucers.

“She’s very good, don’t you think?” Startled, I turned to see a girl about my height and age standing beside me, and she was watching me with a very amused sort of grin on her lips. Like the magician, she had short black hair, but the way hers was cut it framed her face in a pleasant sort of way, and she kept it out of her eyes. She was wearing a pair of worn jeans and a dark jacket that looked to be much too big for her small frame. Though we were about the same size, she seemed to exude a sort of confidence and calmness from the very center of her being, which was something that I did not possess in the slightest.

“Ah, yes. I’ve never seen live magic before… It’s much better than anything I’ve seen on TV… Do you know her?”

It occurred to me that my sentences were coming out a little bit clipped, and I sounded as though I was annoyed that the other girl was even bothering to talk to me. Risako was always scolding me for that. I’ve never really been comfortable talking to other people, so I guess I just always sound uptight, even when I don’t mean to.

The girl didn’t seem to notice or care, however, and she merely continued to smile, nodding her head.

“Yeah, that’s my friend Tokunaga Chinami. I’ve known her for a very long time…” She trailed off at the last sentence somewhat mysteriously, and though I was curious, I decided not to pry. I didn’t even know this girl, after all. “Oh, but I’m being rude. My name is Shimizu Saki.”

She extended one of her hands towards me, and I hesitated for a moment before shaking it timidly.

“Tsugunaga Momoko…”

“You’re not from around here, are you? I mean, I’ve never seen you before, at least…”

“No, I’m not… I’m actually just visiting my cousin…”

Saki seemed to find my reply somewhat strange, and she tilted her head as though she was confused. “Visiting… a place like this? We don’t really get outsiders like you… What does your cousin do?”

“She’s a performer… sings, dances… things like that.”

“Ah… is she a part of that MS troupe, then? They’re very famous here within the city. What’s her name?”

“Yes… I think that’s what it’s called. Her name is Sugaya Risako, anyway.”

The other girl blinked at me. I wondered for a moment if my cousin was perhaps not the people’s favorite…

“You’re… related to Sugaya-san?”

At this point, I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing. “…Yes? Is something wrong?”

“Ah, no, of course not. She’s very talented. I was just thinking about something… It’s not really important.” Saki waved her hand about in a noncommittal way, brushing away the subject as if it hadn’t existed. I might have been inclined to question her further, had the girl not begun to panic at that point.

“Shit…”

“What is it?”

She was looking towards the makeshift stage, and I realized that the magician was gone. Saki didn’t seem happy about this, and before I could even say anything, she began to walk away. I felt the tiniest bit deflated at being abandoned, and let out a sigh as I bent down to pick up my bag again. I turned and was about to make my way back to the station to look for Risako, when the other girl started calling after me and I looked back over my shoulder to see her waving at me cheerfully.

“See you around, Tsugunaga-san!”

Despite the fact that I generally didn’t indulge in such childishness, I managed a tiny smile in reply, and I think I actually even waved back a bit.

As I waited for Risako, I felt as though my world had been made just a little bit brighter.
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Offline Rick-e

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #9 on: April 06, 2007, 03:41:43 AM »
nice! didn't expect a new chapter this fast :D
Quote
“Visiting… a place like this? We don’t really get outsiders like you… What does your cousin do?”
hint hint? :p

Wow Chinami's a street magician! and I think Saki has some history with Risako..
I'm looking forward to see where this is going ^_^ good job!
« Last Edit: April 06, 2007, 03:42:51 AM by Rick-e »

Gaki-san 大好き!

Loser87

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #10 on: April 06, 2007, 04:09:50 AM »
>w<

Wahhh!! I, for some reason keep thinking Saki is going to kidnap Risako >_>
I don't know why, maybe its because I am playing FF9 again...

Hahaha, Saki said a bad word hahaha
I wonder if it really is bad that Chinami disappeared on Saki...hmm..must ponder and think..

Wah Chinami is a magician!!
Post faster, Post more, Post, post, post!!
or...*gives you the eyes of death*
You will find yourself sleeping next to roaches... %_%

I would like to comment and quote but...I've been uber sleepy lately...so..>_>
And...I also think, I've been too nice to you lately >_>...Giving you sweets and an apple..
so..ahem..fufufufufufu..
MUSH, WORK FASTER YOU BUM!!, WORK THAT BRAIN AND TYPE!!! TYPE 3 CHAPTERS PER NIGHT YOU WRITING MACHINE!! YAH!!
*Throws batteries at you*
KUKUKUKUKU!!!
FASTER YAH YAH!!!
*throws a live squid at you*
FASTER FASTER!

Offline ziggurat

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #11 on: April 06, 2007, 04:34:15 AM »
Quote from: FeverInducedMadness
Though we were about the same size, she seemed to exude a sort of confidence and calmness from the very center of her being, which was something that I did not possess in the slightest.

That is my captain :3

Quote
“Shit…”

Don't tell me, you're going to follow loser87 examples?!

Nice, I like this easy-going fic. Go on Momo, keep exploring the world!

(sorry, felt to say that.. lol)

Jab <3 marimari <3 ChrNo~ your spirit shall live forever.. T_T || zgy@last.fm

Offline iacus

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #12 on: April 06, 2007, 09:11:30 AM »
Sweet monkey babies! Loser 87 is mean.
I like what I see so far. I was wondering who "everyone's favorite Berry" was going to be, and it's Momoko, so, cool. Am I just imagining things or are there some hints of oddness afoot in the big city?

Offline FeverInducedMadness

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #13 on: April 08, 2007, 07:56:17 PM »
nice! didn't expect a new chapter this fast :D

hint hint? :p

Wow Chinami's a street magician! and I think Saki has some history with Risako..
I'm looking forward to see where this is going ^_^ good job!

Lol. I was about to post it before you commented.

And yes, I did just answer the question of who the outsider is. Only seven left to guess! :D

Yeah, but there's a reason for that. And you think right. <3
Thanks very much! ^_^

>w<

Wahhh!! I, for some reason keep thinking Saki is going to kidnap Risako >_>
I don't know why, maybe its because I am playing FF9 again...

Hahaha, Saki said a bad word hahaha
I wonder if it really is bad that Chinami disappeared on Saki...hmm..must ponder and think..

Wah Chinami is a magician!!
Post faster, Post more, Post, post, post!!
or...*gives you the eyes of death*
You will find yourself sleeping next to roaches... %_%

I would like to comment and quote but...I've been uber sleepy lately...so..>_>
And...I also think, I've been too nice to you lately >_>...Giving you sweets and an apple..
so..ahem..fufufufufufu..
MUSH, WORK FASTER YOU BUM!!, WORK THAT BRAIN AND TYPE!!! TYPE 3 CHAPTERS PER NIGHT YOU WRITING MACHINE!! YAH!!
*Throws batteries at you*
KUKUKUKUKU!!!
FASTER YAH YAH!!!
*throws a live squid at you*
FASTER FASTER!

No... maybe... nah... well...?

It's VERY bad that Chinami wandered away. You'd probably start freaking out like Saki too, were you in her position.

-filters out all of the usual prodding and orders and projectiles because I am too sleepy-

x_x Yes, master...

That is my captain :3

Don't tell me, you're going to follow loser87 examples?!

Nice, I like this easy-going fic. Go on Momo, keep exploring the world!

(sorry, felt to say that.. lol)

Captain's so cool... <3

No, I'm not. XD Captain wouldn't use such language if she weren't really freaking out. And she's got a good reason to.

Go West, Young Momo, and grow up with the country!

(Sorry, I felt like saying that after reading what you put. XD)

Sweet monkey babies! Loser 87 is mean.
I like what I see so far. I was wondering who "everyone's favorite Berry" was going to be, and it's Momoko, so, cool. Am I just imagining things or are there some hints of oddness afoot in the big city?

Isn't she, though? T-T I suppose someone has to be, though. Otherwise I wouldn't get anything done: I am kind of lazy.

M'glad you like it. :3

And you're imagining the RIGHT things, as the city is a bit odd... hm...
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Offline lil_hamz

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #14 on: April 09, 2007, 06:47:48 AM »
Oh........ so momo's the outsider. Seems like she's not going to have an easy time fitting in.
I was thinking about who Chinami and Saki might be. After pondering for the longest time, my guess is rebel for Chinami and musician for Saki. Am I close?

Offline FeverInducedMadness

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #15 on: April 10, 2007, 02:13:28 AM »
Oh........ so momo's the outsider. Seems like she's not going to have an easy time fitting in.
I was thinking about who Chinami and Saki might be. After pondering for the longest time, my guess is rebel for Chinami and musician for Saki. Am I close?


Indeed she won't. Not at first anyway.
And unfortunately, you are not. But don't despair, perhaps some of the next few chapters will give you some more hints. :3
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Offline FeverInducedMadness

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Re: ::Heartbeat Tempo:: [Prologue -- The Train]
« Reply #16 on: April 10, 2007, 02:16:50 AM »
[Chapter Two -- Dancing, Singing, Exciting! …Not.]

I had seen my cousin dance several times before, but never like this. It was almost as if she was trying to prove something to someone, which surprised me, because Risako really didn’t have anything to prove.

I could see she was going through the movements in her head, twisting and turning her lithe body as the music called for it, hitting every step right on time and making every expression on cue, the way she had been trained to do. Some of the others in the formation around her were having trouble, save for the one in the center, the theatre’s ace.

Her name was Natsuyaki Miyabi, as I had learned earlier on when I was asking Risako about the other girls in her troupe. She had pointed this girl out to me with a disdainful look on her face, and I assumed that the two of them weren’t on very good terms at the moment.

Perhaps my cousin was jealous of the other, because she had always been rather competitive, and not being the best was probably something new for her.

I waved the thought away and went back to watching the dance. Competition was good for Risako. It would make her better.

After a few minutes more of the complicated routine, the music was suddenly cut off, and I turned my head to see the troupe’s leader and instructor Takahashi Ai walk into the room. I had only met Takahashi-san once before, but my first impression of her wasn’t a very pleasant one, and so I wasn’t fond of the girl.

“Alright, we’re done for now… Go home and get some rest and don’t be late for the afternoon practice.” She announced to everyone in a stern voice, and a few of the girls scrambled out the door as quickly as they could, apparently wanting to put some distance between themselves and the theatre.

Risako started to walk over to me, trying furiously to dry her sweat-soaked hair with a towel. I had to admit, I envied my cousin sometimes. It wasn’t fair that she could still look so amazing even after such a hard workout like that. I would have been an ugly mess. And I don’t ‘glisten’ like that, either. She was about to start talking to me, when Natsuyaki approached us, scrutinizing me with those eyes of hers.

She was pretty too, with a long, mature face and a slender body, but she was giving off semi-evil vibes. Like the ones you get from girls you consider to be… well, bitches. There’s not really another word that comes to mind, and I don’t curse very often. Not even in my mind.

“So this is who you brought in to be Yurina-chan’s replacement? …She doesn’t look like much at all.”

I bristled at first, not at all appreciating that condescending tone of voice the girl was using. I had half a mind to draw myself up to my full height of five feet and teach her a lesson, when I rewound to freeze on the first part of what Natsuyaki had said.

“…Replacement?”

Risako had guilty written all over her face. She was looking at me as though she were very uncomfortable to be there at that point in time, and began to fidget a little, the way she always does when she gets nervous. I stared at her, expectantly waiting for an answer.

“This girl, Sugaya-chan? …I’m not so sure about your judgment in this case… This girl is smaller than Kumai… I don’t think she’ll be able to learn the moves or be able to catch up vocally in two weeks, even if we’re in dire need of someone to fill that empty spot…”

Takahashi-san had apparently overheard Natsuyaki talking, and had come over to join in the conversation as well. I was getting slightly annoyed. I had no idea what was going on here, and for some reason, I didn’t think I was going to like it when I found out, either.

“Excuse me, empty spot? I’m not here to replace anyone… I’m just visiting, that’s all. Right, Risako-chan?”

I never took my eyes off of my cousin. She looked like she wished that she could disappear into the ground, and now I was starting to feel a little bit betrayed. I could tell that she had promised these people that I would help out without asking me first, and had expected me to just go along with it all.

“I was going to ask you about it when we had a chance to talk, I swear… Yurina fell and hurt her leg a week ago, and she won’t be able to dance and rehearse before the performance… We really need your help, Momo-chan…”

Little cutesy pet names were not going to dig her out of this particular hole. Fortunately for Risako, Miyabi was there.

“Do we really? Even if she can dance, I bet she can’t sing at all.”

I turned my head to give Natsuyaki the hardest, angriest glare that I could possibly manage. It was definitely on, now. Risako seemed to be able to sense that, and looked on with curiousity, and perhaps a bit of excitement. I stood up to find that the other girl had a good two or three inches on me, and she was smirking at me evilly, as if she had wanted me to challenge her.

“You’re wrong… Want to find out just how much?”

She snickered, as if thoroughly amused by something. I decided right then and there that I didn’t like her that much at all.

“Yeah, sure. Impress me, Momo-chan.”

If I was a dog, I probably would have growled at her. But I’m not and I didn’t, and Takahashi-san went over to turn on the speakers in order to play the song the girls had been dancing to a few minutes earlier. The lyrics had been playing in the background for about two hours, and so I had the song pretty much memorized by now. It was one of those bubblegum, happy, bouncy songs that required a high vocal range, and an agile voice.

Thankfully, I happened to have both. Even if my voice was a bit rusty and hadn’t been used in a while. Takahashi-san turned to us, explaining that she was going to skip forward to the second chorus only.

“Miyabi, you take the first part of the chorus and… ah…”

“Tsugunaga Momoko desu.”

“Right… Tsugunaga-san, you can take the last half of it.”
She switched the sound on, and I listened as the combination of piano and artificial base and back-up vocals flooded the room. Natsuyaki smirked at me, and as the music led up to the chorus, she began to sing:

ichinen nara gaman dekiru
yume aru nara tokoton mezase
ofuro no toki neru mae to ka
chotto wa denwa shite!


Her voice was nice, I had to admit… but it didn’t fit a song like this. She sounded like she was straining, especially near the top. It was my turn now, and I had little time to mentally prepare myself before the lines came, and thus I acted on instinct:

gonengo demo ude wo kunde
jyuunengo mo ichaicha ichaicha
nani yori mo kono shunkan ga
sekai de ichiban suki
anata ga ichiban suki? suki! suki!


Risako was grinning at me with something like… I don’t know. Pride, I guess. I had walked all over Natsuyaki with that. She was staring at me with a different expression. Kind of like she was really angry and stunned and kind of jealous all at the same time. It was an ‘I really hate you right now’ look.

I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I enjoyed it.

Even Takahashi-san looked somewhat impressed… or amused. Whatever, it was good.

“Well, well… Perhaps I misjudged you… Be sure to show up for tonight’s rehearsal on time. Goodbye, ladies.”

The instructor left us, and Natsuyaki stood there for a moment, before shooting me another glare and stalking after Takahashi-san. She also managed to run into the doorframe on her way out, and Risako and I enjoyed a good laugh at her expense. But I wasn’t done with my cousin just yet, oh no.

“…I’m still not very happy with you about this… You could have just asked me instead of tricking me and making believe that you actually wanted to see me…”

That did it. Risako seemed to be struck with immense guilt after I said that. I was almost sorry for laying it on so thick. Almost. I did have to ‘punish’ her for this.

“I knew that you would have said no. …I know how you hate this place. I know that you only come when I ask you to… And I really did want to see you… I’m glad you’re here, Momo-chan. Honest. It’s been a really long time, and I’ve missed you.”

It’s not fair. She always turns it around on me like that.

“I might still say no. I don’t have to do this, you know.”

The color seemed to drain from Risako’s face, and I could tell that she was panicking inwardly. Before she could say anything about it, however, I held up a hand to silence her.

“…But… I’ll give it a try for a day or so… Who knows… I could change my mind.”

She threw her arms around my neck and hugged me so tight that I could almost feel the air being squeezed out of my lungs, and I was lifted slightly off of the ground. It’s not a pleasant feeling, should you ever be unfortunate enough to experience it. I hadn’t even said yes yet for goodness sakes.

I had mixed feelings about all of it.

Maybe I should have stayed at home.

*lyrics taken from the Berryz' Gyagu 100kai bun Aishite Kudasai. I don't own them, nor did I write them or anything crazy like that.
« Last Edit: April 10, 2007, 02:18:22 AM by FeverInducedMadness »
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Offline Estrea

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Oooo interesting, Risako the liar. XD Tricking Momo into coming to help replace Yurina. Poor Yurina, hurting herself...o_o; Miyabi sounds pretty bitchy here. XD

...I can't help but think of Kaleido Star here for some weird reason. Lol.

Should be interesting to see how practice goes later. :)

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Offline ziggurat

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So, Risako, Miya and Yurina are originally the members of this group.

What can I say, Miya is really that evil :3

Hehe, Momo is the one that owns Gag. (well, in this case, the real universe :D)

Now, all I need is Maasa, Yurina and our beloved Maiha XD

Keep up the good work FIM! (trying to not throwing random thing :D )

Jab <3 marimari <3 ChrNo~ your spirit shall live forever.. T_T || zgy@last.fm

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I'm making this short because my internet is evil and I need to call the service later today to complain

HOORAY FOR NEW CHAPTER...FINALLY!
God It's so fun and cute, You need to update faster
There is no scolding for a while as I realized I have a pile of homework to finish and a crappy dsl line to fight with

Until then,
POST NEW CHAPTERS YAH!! *Throws a man at you*

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