*Wipes the spider webs away* Is there still someone reading this?
If yes, I'm so so so so so so so so sorry for the delay everyone. But I have had a lot of studying, training and work to do so I haven't had much time for writing. But I haven't forgotten this story! It still goes on till the very end
Yunagi: Out of the Google Earth xD Otherwise I will leave more of these, ah so lovely cliffhangers and keep... 4 months breaks from writing xD
Okay, some notes: I have planned how this story is about to go and there are still about... 10 chapters left. Something like that, take or add 2-4 chapters. Also, no matter what the current situation in the hello project world is at the moment, this story goes on as I have planned it. Amen for that
And, like I already said, I have a lot of things going on at the moment, so the next update might be quite far away. Unless I start procrastinating, which hopefully wont happen. It wont happen. I just decided so.
Anyhow! The next chapter, here we go~ (And I'm so sorry about the possible typos and confusions. I just wanted to get this quickly out so it would stop bothering me. If there is something that really bothers you/you don't understand something, just ask me.)
Chapter 46 - Trust them, keep on going“Yes.”
The word had never sounded as beautiful as it did now. It took a moment for Ai to register what her lover had just said before it truly sank in her head that she wasn't dreaming. The leader had heard right. Risa had accepted her proposal.
But before Ai could do or say anything, someone else did. A squeal was heard as one certain Tanaka Reina jumped up and clapped her hands together. She had a stupid, although tired, grin on her face. She was about to say something when she finally realized that she had interrupted quite an important moment. Her face dropped when she realized that she had kind of stolen Ai's show.
“Oh, sorry... Please carry on.” She apologized and waved her hands sheepishly.
Smiling so much that it almost reached her ears, Ai turned back to Risa and finally dropped the sword she had been holding against the bean's neck for a long while now. As Ai saw the bean's smile, she got only more encouraged. The leader reached her hand behind Risa's head and smiled briefly at her. After that she pulled their heads close to each others and kissed her lover firmly. As soon as her lips pressed on Risa's, the whole training area exploded in a huge applause an cheers as everyone showed their enthusiasm for the new, soon to be married, couple.
As they kissed, Risa slowly encircled her own arms around Ai's middle section. She heard everyone around them but all she registered in her head was her loved one and only her. Ai was holding her tightly as kissed her lovingly at the same time. When she had said yes, Risa had been a bit scared. It was a huge decision and the bean preferred to plan something like this carefully before jumping in any kind of conclusions. There were so many issues she should think about and truth to be told, Risa hadn't even thought about getting married with Ai. That made the younger girl wonder if saying yes had been the right decision.
But as the leader was holding her and kissing her lovingly, the bean knew she didn't need to worry at all. She would be safe with this woman, no matter what, and most importantly, she would be loved as she was.
When they finally pulled apart, the two shared gentle smiles with each others. This all felt so unreal but at the same time, it felt amazingly good. It was like after all the hardship, struggling and pain they had finally found the golden middle road once again. It seemed like there was light at the end of the road once again and that everything would eventually be just all right.
Ai turned so that she could face the two leader's who surprise surprise didn't cheer and clap their hands together but stayed cool and calm like a perfect officer should do. However, the young leader could notice how Miki had a small smile on her face. It was almost invisible, but it was there, Ai was sure of it.
The captain and General had ordered Ai to clear her head and solve how she could concentrate on the training better but doing it this way... This was totally something the two hadn't been prepared for. But at the same time, the officers were rather proud: Their little brat had finally gotten adult and was moving forwards in her life. Just like the both higher ranking warriors had hoped when Ai had changed five years ago.
Goto was a bit different story than the captain. She was not smiling, neither was she looking angry or disappointed. She was just watching the young leader with her stern and usual face. Finally, she sighed deeply, nodded to Ai and turned around to leave the training area. Miki looked after Goto before she looked at Ai again, smiled and showed thumbs up for the younger female. Ai was confused at first, but soon her face melted into a warm smile. She nodded to the captain and then turned to her lover again, who was now accepting congrats from everyone around them.
“The training is over.” Miki's commanding voice suddenly boomed in the room. Everyone went silent and listened to her. ”Next one will be tomorrow. Rest today and get prepared for tomorrow. And,” The captain continued just as she was about to turn around and follow the general. She pointed the couple and smirked wickedly at the same time. ” you two. Don't be late.”
This caused both Ai and Risa to blush a bit, but soon they only laughed. They had more reason to celebrate what had happened a while ago than be embarrassed about what happened last night. Besides, only the general anc captain knew about this issue, no one else did.
“Tanaka, Kamei, make sure these two lovebirds will make it to the training in time.” Miki shouted over her shoulder as she made her exit from the training area. Both Reina and Kamei, who had by now come closer to their friends so they could congratulate them, snapped in attention, as well as they could, and saluted. ”Yes ma`m!”
“Good. Carry on.”
Miki's voice could be heard from the exit door and finally a small crack of the wooden door told everyone that she had finally left the area. As the captain was gone, Reina turned around and went to the couple who was once again lost in each others eyes and were just about to kiss.
“THIS IS SO GREAT GUYS!! CONGRATS!!”
She yelled and jumped so that she could take both her friends in a tight one arm hug. Suddenly, the kitten had gotten some extra energy and seemed to have forgotten that she should be recovering and not jumping around. But she could care less now. Her friends were going to get married and that should be celebrated!
“Reina...!!”
Ai squealed as Risa just yelped something. The kitten kept on hugging them and ranting about something, till she was finally pried away by Eri's gentle tucking in her sleeve. The turtle had managed to wheel herself closer to her friends. She had noticed how Reina was about to jump out of her pants, so the Eri had decided to calm her down. It was okay to be happy about this, but Reina should be recovering as well and running around like that wouldn't do any good for her condition.
“Now, now, calm down.”
Eri said in a whisper like tone, Reina obeying immediately what she said. She didn't want to force Eri to talk too much or look after her so she decided to calm down. But that didn't remove the grin she had on her face. The smile on Reina's face made both Ai and Risa feel uncomfortable. She was about to say something to tease the couple and knowing the kitten, she would go on, till someone would literally make her shut up.
“My my, didn't see that coming. Our leader is getting married and with who. Oh boy!”
“You know.... you're never going hear end of this teasing...”
Eri said as she smiled weakly at her two friends, who were now both rubbing their sore necks, thanks to Reina.
“Well, I don't know about Risa, but I wont mind that at all.” Ai said as she took a better hold of the bean, circling both her arms around her waist now. ”I am the luckiest person on the world right now.”
“Awww, what a charmer!”
Reina kept on making her stupid faces and such, till she was finally silenced by Eri, as the turtle slapped her shoulder gently.
“I think I wont mind that either.”
The bean said to her lover, as she leaned a bit in so she could place her head against Ai's chest.
“In the end, this is something we both have wanted”
Ai smiled down at her lover. Soon, she leaned her head lower and placed her lips once again on Risa's. Yes, they indeed wouldn't mind the teasing. They had better things to focus on and well, they already were used to Reina's teasing. Really, nothing could make them think about something else than their future together.
“Well, I think I will have something to tease you about.” Reina muttered, as her teasing were not heard. When no one seemed to notice her, the kitten shrugged and said like nothing was specific was happening around her. ”I just have to ask the captain and general.”
This caused both Risa and Ai to freeze. They kept their lips sealed as they turned their gazes to the now broadly grinning kitten. Oh yes, things like this spread like a black death inside the warrior order and she had finally gotten her much wanted attention.
“Reina....”
Eri mumbled as she knew very well what her kitten friend had meant. She felt a bit sorry for her friends, because they truly were never going to hear the end of this.
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Goto walked slowly out of the training area and outside of the whole building. There, she headed to a one certain fenced area, which looked like it was ready to collapse at any moment. The general walked closer, stopping just in front of the gate. She looked inside the area, which now had grass wildly growing around. All kind of memories flashed through her mind as she remembered some old times. Old times, which would totally come to end soon.
“That was quite a surprise.”
The voice of Captain Fujimoto interrupted Goto's train of thoughts and she only nodded as an answer. Miki walked beside her, holding both her hands behind her back. The two officers stood in silence, looking inside of the small fenced area. Only a gentle breeze moved their clothes gently but otherwise the two warriors looked like statues. Miki too had many memories in here and she knew exactly what the general was thinking of. They stayed in silence, just looking inside the fenced area and listening the cheers that came from inside. Finally, Miki decided to break the silence.
“You knew this day would come.”
She said calmly. Once again, Goto only nodded her head as a response, not saying a word.
“Though, I have to admit that this came as a total surprise, but hey.” The captain paused. ”When do these things come as planned?”
The general only nodded once again as she kept her gaze on the fenced area. Miki kept a small pause. She knew that Goto was listening to her, though for a outsider it might have looked like the captain was talking to a brick wall.
'It feels so unreal how time flies so fast...'Finally, the captain got enough of the silence. Or more likely, she got enough how her friend was spacing out so badly. It was very rare to see Goto staring in one place for a longer than 2 seconds, but at the moment, the general was looking inside the fenced area like she tried to order the grass to grow by her willpower or something.
Miki sighed and shook her head a bit. Yes, Ai was like an own child to her too, but the general seemed to take this step quite heavily. They had watched after that brat from since she joined the training and even before that and especially after Heishiro had died. Now, that Ai was getting married, it felt like they had to let go of the kid and that she had finally grown up. Or well, she was legally an adult for she was over twenty years old. But she had always been the same kid to the captain and general.
They both had known this for a long time now and yet it still hit them like a ton of bricks. It amused Miki a bit how they could kill a person without thinking twice, but when their student grew up and got more independent, they both went silent as if something serious had happened. Maybe they too had some kind of a soft spot under their hard shelters.
“You okay?” Miki finally asked, when Goto hadn't moved or talked at all in a while. The captain was really getting worried about her friend and she bet that she was just imagining things, but the grass actually looked a bit taller than a while ago.
“I am...” Goto finally grumbled. There was a silence again, but this time, it was broken by the general as Goto continued on. But still, she kept her gaze inside the fenced area.
“It just feels...” She started quietly, but so that Miki would catch her words. Without a word, the captain came a bit closer, giving all her attention to the general now. She knew this wasn't easy for her friend and though Goto didn't show it, she needed someone beside her at the moment. Only Miki knew it and no one would ever believe it even if she told someone. The captain waited silently, till she heard the general spoke again.
“Feels.. Feels, like I have failed...” Goto finally whispered.
“Failed?” Miki said, confused. How had the general failed?
“Yeah...” The general continued, still keeping her gaze in the same place as it had been for a long while now. ”I don't know why, but it just feels like that.”
“If you ask me, you have all but failed.” Miki said immediately after Goto had spoken. Her tone was very firm and it finally made the general snap out of her thoughts. Goto turned her face towards the captain beside her. At first, Miki looked at her like she was about to scold the other officer, which she probably never could do because she valued her life way too much, but then her face melted in a brief smile. One of the captain's hands found its way on Goto's shoulder, giving it a firm tap.
“Our order was not to prevent her from growing up, but to look after her. And that you have done perfectly.” Miki paused, before she continued on.
“Without you, that brat would have committed a suicide a long time ago or be a lot worse than what she was. But with your firm leading and ”caring”, her true self stayed there. And now,”
Miki pointed her other hand towards the training hall, which was still full of laughter and cheering. She kept her eyes all the time on Goto's face, making sure that the other officer would be listening to her. The general did for she was very interested to hear what her captain wanted to tell her.
“our brat is getting married to a person she hated at first. If you ask me, that needs a lot of growing up and disciplined training, which you have given to Ai more than anyone else.”
All the time as Miki spoke, Goto's gaze was on the ground as she listened to her captain. Yes, she had taken care of the young leader, but for some reason seeing her grow up and move on her life felt like she had failed something. Or maybe it was just that she was quite sad that Ai was finally able to go on her own. Of course, she was happy too, but the general had gotten used to a life where she was always watching over Ai, making sure that the kid wouldn't kill herself. She had raised her just as Heishiro had asked her to, and yet she felt like she had failed.
“Hey,” Miki said as she squeezed Goto's shoulder and turned the general to face her. There was something in the captain's eyes that made Goto completely focus on what she was about to say next.
“You have fulfilled your order perfectly and there's nothing that you have failed. Ai will still be the same brat for us, even after the marriage, and she wont go anywhere.” Miki continued convincing the general and when it seemed like nothing was happening, the captain patted Goto's shoulder again, gaining her attention back.
”You know you can still order her around like you have done so far even though she is independent now?”
This finally seemed to hit the general. Looking up, Goto met with Miki's smiling face and she couldn't help but smile briefly too. Yes, Ai would always be the same kid she had grown fond to during these years, no matter what she would do or whom she would be with. And though Goto was going to let her grow up, she would also make sure to be the parent figure to the young leader, forever. But of course, she wouldn't tell that to anyone else than to her dear captain. Placing her only hand on top of one of Miki's, Goto looked up at her friend. At first, she just stared at her but then her lips turned into a very brief smile. The captain's own smile got wider when she noticed the change in her friend's face. It was good to get Goto understand that she indeed hadn't failed anything and that even after Ai would get married, they would still look after her. In the end, their command didn't tell when they should stop looking after Ai.
“Thank you.”
“No problem.” The captain answered, but her smile didn't leave her face as she noticed how the general soon had her usual scowl back on her face. Miki's smile more likely turned into a wide smirk when she realized what the other officer was thinking when she was looking at the training area.
“Want me to get them away from there and go celebrate somewhere else?” Miki asked amused and almost burst into laughing, when she saw Goto nodding with a serious face.
“Yes. The training place is not for celebrating but training. Order them to go somewhere else and remind them that they should rest.” Goto said in a very formal tone as she turned back to face the fenced area in front of them.
“I'll take care of that.” Miki said cheerfully as she patted the general's shoulder one more time and turned around to leave. As she walked she yelled over her shoulder:
“I also ordered Kamei and Tanaka to look after them so that they would not be late tomorrow.”
“Good.” Goto said sternly as she stayed in her place. After a few moments the general heard voices behind her as the cheering group of warriors exited the training area. She was silent for a moment but then sighed deeply before her commanding voice boomed through the yard. Even though Goto was facing away from the group, her voice sounded amazingly strong.
“Takahashi.”
The cheering and such stopped and soon Goto heard fast footsteps behind her and how someone stopped few feet behind her. A small thud was heard as heels were snapped together, the student standing exactly forty-five degrees to left behind her student. The general couldn't help but feel proud how the younger female was still doing these things just as she had taught her.
“General.”
A brief smile flashed on her face as she heard that familiar voice. It had changed during the years too, being more mature and deep now. It was not a little girl's voice anymore, but an adult's. As she turned to look at the younger warrior beside her, she didn't see a brat anymore. She saw an adult who was ready to take responsibilities and care of someone else beside herself.
'She looks so much like sensei when he was younger...'Realizing that she had kept the squad leader standing in attention for quite a long while, the general decided to speak.
“Congratulations.”
It was brief as always and the general never liked to talk too much. But she didn't need to for the surprised look and smile after that on Ai's face told her that the younger one received her thoughts. Not showing her confusion for too long, Ai soon shook her head and did as she was taught in this kind of a situation, making the general feel even more proud.
“Arigatoo gozaimazu!”
Ai said as she bowed towards the general. When her face was down, Goto let a rare and warm smile spread on her lips. The smile vanished as soon as Ai got up and the stern mask was once again in its place. Nodding, Goto motioned to the younger one that she was dismissed. Ai smiled brightly, but just when she was about to leave, she stopped and turned back to the older woman. She hesitated for a moment, but finally decided to do what was on her mind.
“Ano, general?”
Turning her face towards Ai, Goto showed that she was listening. The squad leader hesitated more, before she smiled and looked at the general.
“Thank you, for everything.”
Not seeing this coming, Goto only kept stern face. She nodded shortly, before she turned her face away again, giving a hand signal to Ai that she should go. Smiling a bit, Ai walked closer to the older woman and gave a firm pat on her shoulder before running away to her friends.
The whole scene was seen by Miki who was leaning on the training area's door. She had her arms crossed in front of her and a warm smile was on her face. She watched how Ai ran back to Risa, scooping the younger one in her arms and spinning her around one round before she kissed her. After that they left with the rest of the team and other warriors and there was a silence in the training area.
Looking back at the general Miki decided to go inside and clean up the places. But before she turned around, she could see something glisten beside the general's cheek. Or more likely, on it. The captain shook her head and sighed deeply.
”What a killer are you, crying over a thing like this...”
The captain thought as she went quickly inside, wiping her own eyes before it would be too late to hide how she was feeling at the moment.
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The nurse's place was very lively after the four friends had found their way in there. They had decided to go and see Lin Lin and tell her these news about Ai and Risa. But the nurse already knew, though she acted that she knew nothing about this so she wouldn't ruin the atmosphere her friends were having at the moment.
As everyone congratulated the freshly engaged couple, one person didn't join the others as much as she wanted. She stayed a bit away from her friends, a sad smile decorating her lips as she examined Ai and Risa.
'They look so happy...'Eri thought and her smile grew a bit wider when Ai pulled Risa a bit closer so she could give her quick kiss on her lips. At the same time, Eri felt two emotions rush through her body: a huge joy for her friends and a sad feeling as she remembered that she too, had had that kind of moments with someone. And who knows, in the future she could have been in her friend's place with her loved one. But now, she would probably never ever experience something like that.
As Eri kept on looking at her friends, she suddenly noticed something to happen. The more she looked at the couple, the more one of them started to look like Sayu. At some point, the turtle was sure that the tactician was in front of her, smiling that knowing and warm smile of hers. But that couldn't be and as soon as Eri thought so, her dead lover disappeared and everything was like it had been. In front of her were Ai and Risa. No Sayu.
'I feel tired...'Eri thought suddenly and slowly, she started to back away and move into the room which she had occupied for a long while recently. She went quietly, for she didn't want to rise too much attention. This was Risa's and Ai's day and they needed all the attention now. Plus, she didn't want to ruin the day by her own sad feeling. She had already caused enough trouble for them and she didn't want to burden them anymore.
Slowly walking to her bed, Eri sat down and looked out of the window. The room was silent, the only clear sound being the quiet talking of her friends outside the room. But even those voices started to evade and in no time, Eri was sure she didn't hear them anymore. It was just silence that surrounded her.
As she sat there, moment by moment Eri felt more tired and somehow heavy. It was like she was falling and everything around her started to spin slowly. She was alone in this and there was no one else beside her and this was how it would be forever. Her one and only support had gone under the ground and would never come back.
'I am doomed to be alone, without love...'Closing her eyes, Eri let the heavy feeling take over her. She fell deeper in the darkness she was now in and it was like she was alone in the middle of black space with nothing else. As she kept falling deeper, she could feel someone's presence. Turning her head around, Eri tried to see around her, but no one was there. Yet, she was sure that there was someone else present in this darkness with her.
'You're forever alone, no one likes you... There's no love for you.'A voice suddenly echoed in her head as she kept on flowing in the darkness the heavy feeling only getting worse and worse. She was all alone, and no one would never drag her out from here. Eri let her eyes close and as she did so, the feeling like something wrapped around her took over her. It felt cold, heavy and Eri wanted to get away. But she couldn't. The voice kept playing in her head, telling her to just give up. But then, another voice could be heard
”Eri.”
That voice, it was familiar. Was it Sayu? No, it was someone else she knew. The voice repeated her name again and again, every time becoming more concerned. And then, Eri opened her eyes and found concerned Reina crouching in front of her. The turtle had somehow fallen in some kind of unknown state as she had been sitting, but now she was awake, thanks to Reina. Eri sighed a bit. Maybe it was just a dream or then she just fainted or something. Her condition was still a bit unstable so it wasn't anything new if she suddenly fell asleep or fainted.
Eri looked around her a bit, but as she did so she noticed something that made her blood run cold. Her hands were surrounded by something dark and as she tried to lift them, it felt heavy. The turtle looked around her and little by little, the darkness started to appear all around her. She could feel this mysterious presence of someone or something around her once again and it started to make her feel uneasy.
“Eri, why are you here? Is something wrong?”
Reina asked as she placed her hands on Eri's knees. The older girl didn't react to the contact but just stared in front of her. She felt very scared. It was like she couldn't control her own body anymore but someone else was taking control of her. And what scared her most was that she wanted to push Reina away. She didn't know why, but it just felt like that. Hell, she wanted to get away from everyone around her! But at the same time, she wanted to push others away from her because she wasn't herself. This wasn't her, someone else was trying to take control of her body and she didn't want to hurt her friends.
'Go away...'“Eri? What's wrong? Please, tell me.” Reina pleaded and soon, Eri heard how new voices joined them.
“What's going on?”
It was Ai's voice and if the leader was there then it meant that Risa was here too. Remembering suddenly why she had been so sad, Eri's eyes started to water slowly and the voice in her head was back.
'You're forever alone, there's no love for you....'Suddenly, Eri felt how anger washed through her mind. She had no reason to be angry to her friends, but that was how she felt now. She really needed to get grib of herself or something horrible would happen. But she couldn't. She felt so tired of all of this. She just wanted to let go...
“No...”
Eri said quietly as she gripped her head. This caused an alarm to click in Reina's head and in no time, she was beside the older girl, holding one arm around her shoulder and shaking her gently. The kitten looked very worried and even scared as she tried to figure our what was going on with her friend. Though Eri looked like she was only crying, something told Reina that this was more serious.
“Eri?! What's wrong? Tell me!”
By now, Ai and Risa too recognized the way their friend was acting and rushed to her side. It looked like Eri was falling in depression again and they had to do something before it was too late. They had already gotten her to recover this far, so they couldn't let her fall back.
“Eri, please tell me what's wrong! Eri!”
Reina kept on pleading as she held tighter on the older girl. The voice kept on echoing in Eri's mind and she was sure that her head was about to explode. It hurt to hear her friend's worried voices and it didn't make the turtle feel safe at all. She needed to get them away from her, now. But at the same time, she didn't want them to go. She needed them beside her, but at this state, she would only hurt them.
“No... I don't want to...” Eri cried suddenly. She shook her head violently and everyone could see how her body shivered.
“What? What you don't want to?” Reina asked. She felt so helpless how she couldn't make anything for the turtle.
“Alone...” Eri sniffed, but the kitten didn't quite catch what she was saying.
“What? Eri, please talk to me....”
And then it happened. Eri had gotten enough of that voice, enough of this feeling and this state she was now in. She even felt that she had gotten enough of her friends around her and just wanted to get away from here. Somewhere far away, where she would be alone without others. Suddenly jumping on her feet and Eri ripped herself free from Reina's grasp and roared:
”I DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE!!”
The sudden outburst startled everyone around her, causing the three friends to jump back a bit. Ai even went as far as placing her hand on the sword handle on her hip. It made the leader scared, for this was her friend she was afraid of at the moment. But Eri's roar had been something so inhumane, that it made even Reina doubt if this was their lovely aho kame they had known for years now.
In a quick motion, Eri took a hold of a nearby chair. She lifted it easily with one hand and threw the object out of her way. The chair flew amazingly fast to a wall and shattered into small pieces. The way the furniture had broken made alarm click in the other's minds. The chair was in so small piece's that one could actually use the remains of it as tooth stick. Something was seriously wrong with their friend.
Eri was about to move on, but now her friend's realized that if they didn't stop her, someone would lose their lives. And even worse, they would lose Eri forever.
Jumping in front of the turtle, Ai took a hold of her sub leader's upper body. But as the leader did so, she was violently showed away by Eri. It felt like a shock wave had traveled through her chest and the leader had to take few steps back in order to steady herself.
'Hell, what's wrong with her??'Ignoring the pain in her chest, Ai tried to took a hold of her friend again, but this time, she made sure that the others were attacking Eri at the same time. After seeing what had happened to Ai, Reina and Risa understood the situation as well. If they attacked alone, Eri would easily block their attacks. So the three went in at the same time: Ai taking a hold of the turtle's upper body when Risa attacked her legs. Reina was soon taking a hold of Eri's head and hands and with co-operation, they made the turtle fall down on the bed behind her and keep her there. It was not very easy job however. Though there were three of them, it felt like Eri would easily threw them all away if she wanted. But luckily, the turtle was so blinded by her own rage that she didn't think clearly. She kept roaring something and tossing her legs and arms around. The three warriors indeed had hard time keeping their friend in one place so they had to think quickly how to calm her down.
“Eri calm down!!”
Ai commanded, as she pressed her body on top of Eri's, so she could pin her down. It felt more likely wrestling with a bear than a young woman. Few times Ai almost lost her hold around Eri, but somehow she managed to hold on. Meanwhile, Risa made sure that the sub leader could not use her legs at all and Reina tried to keep a hold of the turtle's slashing arms and wildly turning head. The kitten covered her eyes with her hand and brought her own face near to Eri's. It didn't calm Eri down at all.
“Eri, please. Calm down!!”
Reina pleaded, but it had no effect. The only thing Eri was still hearing was the annoying voice that kept on telling how she would be forever alone, without love. No matter how much her friends tried to pull her out from the darkness, Eri could feel nothing else than anger and loneliness. She wanted to get away, to be alone from the others where she wouldn't be a burden. Yes, that was all she was, a burden. No one would love her and she would only cause trouble to others...
'Eri.'A different voice cut Eri's train of thoughts suddenly. That voice, it was different to all the others. Suddenly, the turtle calmed down totally. This gave the other three an opportunity to took a better hold of her, but they had also noticed the change in their friend. They kept their hold, because they didn't know if Eri would continue fighting back in a while.
”Eri?” Reina called her friend, lifting her head up so she could look in the turtke's face. Though Eri could hear Reina's voice and see her face, the other voice was much stronger than the kitten's.
'Eri.'Where was she? No matter what, the turtle could recognize that voice anywhere, anytime and among all the voices. But where was she? And then, Eri saw it. Behind Reina, another head appeared. It was blurry at first, but little by little it got sharper features. It was her.
“Sayu....”
Eri said quietly, causing all the three to gasp. What the heck was she talking about?
“Eri, Sayu is not here....” Reina said quietly, but the turtle was not listening. Instead of trying to struggle to get free, she smiled and kept on looking how Sayu's face got closer. It was like the tactician was about to kiss her and Eri welcomed the act more than willingly. But just when their faces were only few inches away from each other and their lips were about to touch, the turtle passed out.
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'I thought we had a deal about this...'
Sayu said with a disappointed voice. She was standing in the same room they had been for a while now and Eri was still laying on the bed. But there was no one else, just the two of them.
'Sayu...'
'What happened to your promise?'
The demanding and a bit angry voice of Sayu's made Eri's mind clear suddenly and she could remember that she indeed had done a promise to her dead girlfriend. The turtle sat up, the heavy feeling totally gone now. She looked at the dark haired girl in front of her. Sayu was wearing her usual warrior clothes, her hair was down and she had her arms folded in front of her chest. She didn't look pleased at all. Eri felt a bang of guilty wash over her as she met Sayu's eyes. Looking down, the turtle tried to hide from the tactician's piercing gaze as the younger one waited for her answer.
'Ano...'
'What I just saw was something I didn't want to see at all. Never ever again.' Sayu snapped a bit. Eri shivered at her words, but didn't look up. The bunny's expression softened a bit and a sigh escaped her lips. She then came closer and stopped just in front of the turtle. Eri looked up, only to meet the same hard gaze. Or well, it had softened a bit, but it was still sending the same message as a moment ago. Eri tried to be brave in front of Sayu. In the end, she was the only person who she could open up like this. The only one whom she could show her weaknesses and bad qualities, everything.
'I tried...' Eri said quietly. Tears started to fall down her cheeks as she spoke. When Sayu stayed quiet, she continued.
'But I feel so tired. Without you, it's so hard to keep on going... And when Ai proposed to Risa...' This time when the turtle lowered her head in her hands, the ghost in front of her sighed deeply again, her face softening. The hard gaze was replaced by an understanding expression as Sayu looked down at her turtle friend.
'No matter what, you still have to go on...'
'But I can't!!'
Eri almost shouted as she looked up at the younger girl. Sayu only sighed and shook her head. She then reached her hands out and took Eri's head in them gently. The touch felt so real, though Eri knew this wasn't real. It couldn't be, unless she had died.
'Dear, I know it's hard, but you just must try harder. Ne...'
The black haired sat down beside the other girl and took her in a tight hug, the turtle immediately burying her head in her lover's shoulder. Sayu held her, just letting the older one to cry her heart out. When Eri finally calmed down a bit, the tactician spoke again.
'Remember that no matter what, I'll be there watching over you. And you also have your friends with you. They give you strength to go on and they will help you, no matter what happens to you.'
She paused for a while. At the same time, Sayu kept moving her hands gently on Eri's back, making her calm down. When the turtle said nothing, she decided to continue.
'You cannot give up living just because you lost something precious. You got to keep going. You have so much to live and see and I don't want you to die yet.'
Pulling away, the bunny faced the older one. She had red eyes from crying and she looked so miserable. Smiling shortly, Sayu patted her head, the hand then traveling down on Eri's cheek, where it stayed.
'But it's so hard....' Eri whispered.
'I know it's hard. But you just have to trust me and your friends. Everything will be better. You just can't give up.'
Though she wanted to say she couldn't do this and she didn't want to, Eri stayed quiet. Her girlfriend had sacrificed her own ”ghost life” and was now stuck in here because of her girlfriend who suddenly had gotten some suicidal thoughts. She didn't want to her work to be in vain. She didn't want to be a burden to dead ones as well, though in a way she already was. But if she could make the burden any less, she would do that.
And her friends. How much they must have sacrificed their time in order to look after her. If she now gave in, it would all be in vain.
Eri didn't know how she suddenly got these thoughts in her head, but as she kept looking at Sayu's face, which now had a gentle and knowing smile, something made Eri feel that there indeed was still some hope in this world. Even though Sayu was dead, she was still here in some way. And she also had her friends. They would be with her, no matter what. If they had gone this far, there possibly wouldn't be anything worse they would have to go because of Eri. Maybe there indeed was hope after all.
Felling suddenly much lighter and better, Eri opened her mouth and the words she said came out without thinking. But it felt so right to promise something like this for her lover.
'I... I'll try..'
Hearing this, Sayu smiled wide and pulled the other one in a tight hug.
'That's my girl.'
As they hugged, the turtle felt how the world around her changed again. The heavy and dark feeling started lift off her and instead, she felt warm and light. The dark voice in her mind was gone, and it was replaced by something else. The voices became louder and louder, till Eri could hear them clearly. She was still in Sayu's arms, but little by little it felt like she was waking up. And then, everything was black again, but the voices kept on calling her. But for some reason, she could still feel Sayu's arms around her. Or, where they hers? The last thing Eri remembered, was Sayu's voice as she spoke to her:
'Remember that your friends are always there for you. Ai, Risa and Reina are always there for you.... There for you... Always... Ai... Risa... Reina... Reina...'
'Reina...'---------------------------------
“ERI!!”
Reina almost yelled, as she held the older girl in her arms. She was sitting on on the bed's edge, the turtle cradled in her arms. Ai and Risa were standing nearby, looking their two friends worriedly. Lin Lin was already alarmed too and now the nurse was examining the young warrior. She was crouching in front of Reina and moving her hands on top of Eri's body.
The nurse had immediately known what was wrong, since the turtle send some kind of a dark aura. Lin Lin wasn't an expert with spirits and such, but thanks to her senses, she could feel and recognize them when they were close.
As the young nurse moved her hands on top of Eri's body, her face changed suddenly. First, she frowned and then suddenly she had a stern face. Then, she suddenly pulled her hands away and looked scared. Alarmed by that, Ai and Risa came a bit closer. The leader placed her hand on Lin Lin's shoulder in order to support the nurse who looked like she was about to fall on her butt.
“Lin Lin? You okay?” Ai asked as she looked at the nurse questioningly.
“She is with Spirit.” Lin Lin said. This caused everyone around them to gasp. Did she mean... Quickly Realizing what the others might have thought, the nurse quickly shook her head and put her hand back above Eri's face.
“No, she's not dead. She's only connecting with someone who doesn't belong to this world. And that someone is probably Sayu...”
The nurse explained, still a bit horrified what she had seen a while ago. When she had tried to connect with Eri's mind, she had seen Sayu's ghost in the form she would see it in this world. And it wasn't a pretty sight... The spirit had blocked her out and the nurse had a feeling that the bunny had wanted to deal with Eri alone. Knowing that the spirit was Sayu, Lin Lin wasn't too worried about the situation. Though, of course there was always the possibility that something might happen...
“I cannot contact her, because the spirit is blogging me out. But I think she should be fine otherwise...”
“Fine??”
A low growl was heard and everyone turned to look at the kitten holding her loved on in her arms. Reina had rather angry expression, and the scene reminded Risa of a tiger who was protecting its cup or something. The kitten was holding Eri very tightly and looked the trio in front of her like she wanted them to stay away.
“You think she is fine?”
Reina growled again as she glared at the nurse. Eri was definitely not fine. She was in a coma like state and she had been falling in depression just a while ago and now someone said she is fine. Besides, she was connecting with a spirit which might mean that she was dead!
But Lin Lin didn't take Reina as a threat. She had seen many times how someone lost control over her emotions when the question was about their loved ones. Also, Reina too had been in a bad condition for a while ago, so it was no wonder her state of mind had wavered when she had been alarmed by Eri.
“Calm down please.”
The nurse just said, but that only angered Reina more. The kitten growled once again and almost shot up, but luckily the two other warriors had seen where this was about to go. They launched themselves on Reina's arms and held her down, minding Eri all the time. But they didn't need to keep the kitten down for a long while. Someone else calmed her down.
“Reina....”
Everyone froze as they heard Eri's voice. Reina's face turned immediately to the turtle and when she noticed that she was slowly awakening, she forgot the others. She pulled her arms free from Ai and Risa and took the turtle in a tight hug, the two backing away a bit at the same time.
“Eri... You okay??”
She asked quietly as she held the other girl. Eri was quiet again. The meeting with Sayu was still fresh in her mind and the words she had said to her. But one word echoed more than the others in her head.
'Reina...'“Reina...”
Hearing her name, the kitten pulled a bit away from the older girl so she could see her face. They both stared each others for a long while, not uttering a word. Reina didn't know what she should do. Eri had been calling her name and now she just stared at her with those tired eyes. After staring in each other eyes for a good while, a small smile formed on Eri's lips. Reina gasped in surprise, but soon she was panicking again as the turtle's head fell to her side and her eyes closed.
“Eri..!!”
Reina got worried, but then she heard Eri's voice again. The kitten held her friend in her arms and pressed her head closer to hers so she could hear better.
“I'm sorry... I'll try harder from now on...”
Not understanding a word what she was saying, the kitten only turned her head to stare at the girl in her arms. For a while nothing happened, but then the turtle opened her eyes and looked up at the younger one. She gave another short smile to her. Now also the others could see the smile she was giving to the kitten. They had seen Eri smile god knows how many times, but the smile she was giving to Reina at the moment. The turtle had given such warm smiles only to one person before.
“Thank you Reina... For always being out there.”
Slowly realizing that the other girl might have finally come back to them, smile spread on the kitten's lips. She slowly gathered Eri in her arms and hugged her closer. The younger warrior buried her face in Eri's soft hair and held her like she was never letting go.
“I'll always be there for you...”
She said as she hugged her. In a moment, she felt how Eri slowly raised her arms up and hugged her back. It was a weak hug, but it still was a hug. How worried she had been for fer friend. For a while, Reina had been sure that the turtle had lost it again, but now she knew that Eri was with them again. She just knew it, though there was a high possibility that the turtle could still snap and go berserk like she had done a while ago.
“She will be fine.”
Lin Lin said finally, smiling as well. She could sense the good aura that was radiating from the two on the bed and she knew Eri was with them again. Ai and Risa only looked at each other, but decided to trust the nurse. In the end she had the talent to see deeper in people's minds and souls than anyone else. And the scene in front of them also convinced them that Eri indeed would be fine. At the moment, they wished for it more than anything else.
As everyone were taking care of Eri, a small, dusty, cloud like thing moved away from the room. It walked through the wall and kept on going. Now that she was sure that Eri would keep her word and try again, Sayu could leave her from her eyes.
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I hope you enjoyed this, if there's still someone reading this... xD
Topic: Re: The mask of soul//chapter 48/ 10/31 (Read 43461 times)