JPHiP Forum
The Hello! Project Fanfics => H!P Fanfics => Topic started by: Estrea on August 29, 2010, 07:17:40 PM
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I'm reviving my own interest in Gegenschein by writing a piece of history far far beyond the time in Gegenschein proper. This is a narrative from several thousand years before, and will skip between two main protagonists. I will be writing them in unfamiliar names, names that suit the historical setting, and hopefully I'll capture the setting of that era as I see it. It will be up to the reader to figure out who is who. :D One is obviously Ai, the Ancient one. Except she'll still be very noob here. You'll see. This is her beginning.
Thus I present to you,
Gegenschein: The First
Look, there it is, the city they built. The great ziggurat they're so proud of.
We're pulling it down aren't we? They who think to exterminate us. We who are like and unlike them. We will carry it to them, the war they begun.
The tower that reaches to the moon. Do you think there is an afterlife for those like us? Do you think we will ever see them again?
I see Him every time I close my eyes. Do you?
The plains of Shinar are so quiet tonight. What do you hear, Raven-Truthsayer?
Ready then, my friend?
Not friends then. Yet.
But we have forever to figure it out.
Don't we, partner?
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I needed to start somewhere. :P Just to begin the thread really. Some characters here have yet to be introduced in Gegenschein proper, but are important there. But I will not show who they actually are, of course. Have fun deciphering as you go!
Oh and, this won't be too long a story, I think. Once this is over I shall go back to Gegenschein proper. :D This I swear.
I hope people will like this!
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Oooo~! You've caught my attention!
Ziggurat? Soooo? Aztec? Mayan? Hmm, did they have Ziggurats other places? *racks brain for long forgotten history lessons*
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Here I am again!
rndm: Wrong part of the world. :P History plays a very big part here. I did my research, though it isn't as much as I probably would have liked. I did have to look up a few maps for my own benefit though. Haha. I'm obsessive. :D I'm glad I have your attention!
Next narrative is short, but it introduces a key character. :) Enjoy!
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Tablet I
That day, it snowed.
Small flakes, powdery dust fine in the air. It settles on hair, across shoulders, lying in sleep over the vast plains.
The two tones rang high, low. Almost musical, far from natural, and everything besides.
The spirits dance for us, spirits of flame and ice and rushing wind. My feathers flutter like wings as I dance. Circles, shapes, echoes of patterns unnamed.
We dance.
Together and apart. Fast, then slow. Like a neverending circle.
Like the winds of our plains they come, slashing and rushing. Unforgiving and unrelenting. Indifferent. My people scatter, the dance forgotten. Songs turn to screams. Pristine white turns to fine red slush, trampled.
The spirits kept dancing. Around me, my feathers billow in the wind.
It came too soon, ducking low. A feinting move, thrusting high.
I am alone. The dead around me; once friends and family. Kin and tribe, blood of my own. I hold a boy in my arms. He is cold, colder than the frost and ice of my land. I sit still.
My feathers all around me. Black as night, dark against the pale, pale skins of my blood-kin.
I saw and was no longer there. Moments later I was away and behind. The noonday sun glinted off the beaten bronze, gleaming gold in reflected glory. I held still until the horn signaled my victory, ending in a bow across dusty sand.
They find me. Dark hair like raven's wings, eyes like solid onyx. They call me Raven, after the feathers I wear. Later I find that they speak of death, the raven that bears tale of the barrows.
I am Raven. The sun beat down on us, the Chosen. We who are ordained to find those who are a sin against those ordained with numbered days on this earth, those who have days uncountable.
My sappara is at rest, glinting green-gold in the light. I breathe slowly, hiding all signs of exhaustion. My skin has tanned under the Anatolian sun, the only signs of my exertion the sweat sheen gleaming on golden-brown.
I look up, the sun's harsh glare foreign to me. Years have passed and will pass, but all I have to do is close my eyes, and see snow once more. I will never forget.
That day, it snowed.
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Notes:
1) sappara - Bronze Age weaponry, the Caananite "bronze sickle-sword", can be traced back to 3rd millennium BC Sumer.
2) Anatolia - Asia Minor, a geographic and historical term denoting the westernmost protrusion of Asia, comprising the majority of the Republic of Turkey. The region is bounded by the Black Sea to the north, Georgia to the northeast, Armenia to the east, Mesopotamia to the southeast, the Mediterranean Sea to the south and the Aegean Sea to the west.
I'm a geek. I might also be wrong. Feel free to correct any historical errors. XD
And so we have Raven. Note also the shifting tenses here. It means something. At least, I intended it to. XD Have fun!
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Wooo~~
I always liked the gegenschein series. Glad to see you have started it up again.
I see we are going way back. Back into time. Back to the biblical days. What fun!
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*snaps fingers* Damn, that was my next guess, really, I didn't have to look it up at all! Not at all. XD
The beginning of a vampire hunter? So, Raven is the hunter? Who is Raven-Truthsayer? The hunter turned?
...
...You know, I'm just getting ahead of myself. It's like two posts in and I'm trying to figure out the whole story. :lol:
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^
of course you're the type to do that xD
i seriously love that we're going back in time^^ and i usually fail with history and like desiphering stuff but i shall try my best to think who's who^^
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:onioncheer:
Major yay for Gegenschein/Vamp Seirei HISTORY!!!!!
I've always been a fond one of history :wub: Although I can't ever guarantee that I actually understand it :lol:
Hmmm... we've been given information here, most likely bits and pieces that will probably make a lot more sense as you feed us more and we begin to assemble things together. But for now, I can only make wild assumptions. But hey, no problem, that's exactly what I said would make a good story. Raising so many questions so early on XD
We're pulling it down aren't we? They who think to exterminate us. We who are like and unlike them. We will carry it to them, the war they begun.
The tower that reaches to the moon. Do you think there is an afterlife for those like us? Do you think we will ever see them again?
I'm thinking this is Vampire Ai speaking, but I can't be sure.
She's asking a lot of questions. That could indicate her noobiness. Or it could not. It could just be your way of planting more questions in our own head.
Most likely a vampire anyway.
I see Him every time I close my eyes.
Who's the reverent Him?
The plains of Shinar are so quiet tonight. What do you hear, Raven-Truthsayer?
Is the vampire actually with Raven at this point? Or is that just a quiet question the vampire is thinking to herself/himself?
Gah. So many questions.
Ready then, my friend?
Not friends then. Yet.
But we have forever to figure it out.
Don't we, partner?
Very intriguing... the relationship between Vampire and Hunter seems a lot more complicated than it is at first glance.
:mon huh:
Tablet I
This little piece was incredibly well-written and a really good one to try and decipher, but I can't come up with anything good, or at least intelligent to say about it :nervous
Correct me if I'm wrong... but did Raven's people get attacked by the Vampires, and he (with his apparently more spiritual entity) was then bestowed with the title of a Chosen one? Is he the first? Who are they, the others who have also become Chosen ones? Raven's friends and family were all slaughtered, so...
Well again, I'm probably not on the right track, but it's a start to try to make sense of things. The finding out will be all the more fun a process. :twothumbs
THANK YOU ESSY FOR DECIDING TO WRITE THIS UP AND FOR PROMISING TO CONTINUE WITH THE REAL DEAL AFTERWARDS!
:heart: :heart: :heart:
Looking forward to the next update! :love:
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*raeds poulroge* hmm.... *raeds cahtper 1* ahhh...Ai sea.
Him? I wdnoer who I cahn's bineg huanetd bye. Cepery srie ddue or hntuer ddue?
Reavn-Turhtseayr...the olny tihng reavn Ai can tinhk of is Sayu (or taht reavn taht tnuated I cahn in Eonby Dsuk...tlak aoubt out of pcale toghuht!). *mtteurs smeointhg aoubt a Sayu acesntor wtih a mnaly nmae* XD *raeds on* O write...msut be smeonoe form taht Gaki caln.
Hmm I'm lfet wtih mnay hlaf toguhhts....msot of tehm lainedg to taht pryo clhid form Ggeheinescn pepror. pnetarr? hetunr? tswietd lvoe targinle?
ahwnyoo iignuintrg rtesart. revenge exacted :P
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A story of biblical proportions! :lol: an intresting start to the fic so far, looking forward to more
Nice too see the Gegenschein stories back one way or another.
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:w00t: :w00t: :w00t:
The fic that made me adore the Titan :yep:
Will read hopefully tomorrow... I need to go to bed early.
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And back! I shouldn't be writing when I have work in the morning, but who cares?!
Fen: I like the Gegenschein series too, but it's such a huge project. XD It was intimidating to pick up again, but well, it's a worthy epic (I think XD). Yup, way back into time. What fun!
rndm: I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. :P I like how you keep trying to figure stuff out, but then again you have pretty good instincts for this sort of thing. Not confirming or denying anything, but you have some pretty good ideas. :D
kawaii beam: Just enjoy the ride. :D That's good enough for me.
Beecubed: I love raising questions and making my readers think. :D I like how you dissect the prologue like you're doing a literature review. XD And complicated is more fun, no? Well, as for your speculations regarding the Chosen, forgive me for not answering them at the moment, because it'll be revealed later in greater detail. :) The only thing I can confirm is that Raven's tribe is slaughtered, and that he/she is the last survivor of that clan. Everything else is up in the air. :P And you're welcome. Haha. You should give yourself a pat on the back, you're part of the reason for making me pick up the series again, what with talking about it on the fanfic discussion thread and all. XD The best way to get me to do something is to keep on bringing it up, though it doesn't always work. XD
Sukoshi: Have I mentioned how much I hate you? :heart: XD That was just fricking evil. But thanks for caring enough to do it anyway. Lmao.
oddball: Of biblical proportions indeed! I hope I live up to the hype too. :lol:
kRisZ: Aww Gegenschein made you like me? Wait, you didn't like me before? :O D: :lol:
And time to edit and post~
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Tablet II
The first time I drowned, I became afraid of water.
Vertigo. Sun above my head, or was it around? So many bubbles. Can't breathe. Up, down, which way was safe? Hard left with the current, head against rock. White out, then black.
The next time I opened my eyes, I was safe.
The second time I drowned, my whole life changed.
Shouts at my back. I set a ragged pace, tearing through thorns and leaping over raised roots. Dodging, weaving. Every breath an agony, each cut sapping my strength. Brambles score my skin, leaving bits and pieces of myself behind with every step.
Out of the trees, into the open! I skid to a halt, a toenail catching painfully against a pebble. My muscles cry for rest. Behind me, dogs bark madly, thrilled by the chase. I hear them crashing through the undergrowth. I pant, moving on sheer adrenaline, fueled by terror.
No way but forward. Across the rocky promontory, blood marking my trail. I climb on my hands and knees, further out on the ridge. The river rushes below, leaping joyfully around rocks, kicking up white foam on the edges.
Torches bob closer behind me. The yipping of the dogs draw near, and the first one to scramble after me receives a kick in the face. Little more than a warning, but it keeps its distance, waiting for the rest of the pack.
I know they will kill me. Worse than kill. I have struck dead the son of the chief. Never mind that he was a lecher out to claim me without consent of my father, it remains that he is dead and I was the one who killed him.
I was to have been whipped sixty times by the scourge, an ordeal I would never have survived. Bound and thrown in a pit, I would have been sent to my fate at dawn, but for my brave mother. Braving censure and equal punishment, she set me free. Sheer bad luck then, to have encountered a pair of lovers out in the forest for a midnight tryst. Their outcry was enough to leave me in my current state.
Triumphant shouts in the distance. Close. Too close. The dogs were gathering. No way forward, except down. My hands shake, though not with exhaustion.
I would not be caught. To be caught was to die most painfully. The alternative was not much better. The stream rushing below seemed both very near and far away.
I am not brave at all. And I don't want to die. Fierce tears streamed from my eyes, blurring my vision. Behind me, half the village bursts into the clearing. I can't hear their shouts.
Turning one last time, I skim the little faces briefly illuminated by the wavering torches. Is that my mother I see, crying out in grief for me? Or my father, restrained by two others? My heart clenched, with fear and love for them. There was only one way to cleanse the stain on the family.
I don't want to die. But I will not be dragged back, my family beside me, to die painfully under the whip. Dust shifts under my weight as I move, raw skin scraping across jagged rocks. Pain, fear, determination. I won't die like this. I won't.
I am bleeding. I am crying.
Then I fall, and everything changes.
The third time I drowned, I never came back up again.
I was lost, and I was found. I was abandoned to the gods, and saved by one. I expected nothing, and gained everything.
I found Him. He who gave me life, not once, but twice. He who rescued me when no one else had, when no one else could. He was the sun, the moon, more radiant and beautiful than both combined. Aloof and alone, he was untouchable, a raging flame in the darkest of nights.
He was also the only man I have ever loved, and will ever love.
A man, did I call him? No, more than a man, far far more. More alive than anyone I have ever known. So filled with life that he could not ever die, or so I thought.
I wanted our time to be forever. I wanted to grow old and die in his arms, even though he would remain as always, young and beautiful through the ages. I wanted to give him something to remember, in his lonely journey through time.
Above all, I wanted him to be happy, if only for a while. No one should be alone as he was, as he was cursed to be. I loved him, but I could not stay with him forever, mortal as I was. He would never curse me with his fate, and I made him promise never to do so.
For I was born human, and will die human. There is no greater joy than that.
If only we had more time together. Just a little more time, for his seed to grow within me. Perhaps he would have had something to care for after me then. Perhaps someone to keep him company through endless time, as I could not.
But it was not to be.
They came, like a pack of locusts seeking to destroy. He fought them, but there were so many. I did my best, surprising one or two with a stick. Then it all ended in a burst of red, and I was drowning once more. Drowning in my own blood.
He could have won. Could have fought clear, at the very least. He stopped for me, and it cost him. I didn't know. I could not know. I couldn't even breathe, much less see clearly through the red haze. All I felt was Him, warm and safe around me. Secure in his embrace, I could even have slept through it all.
I did.
And when I woke, nothing would ever be right again.
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Compressing all that drama into bite-sized pieces is pretty damn hard. orz
Needs more expansion...*ponders*
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Okay, I understand. She protected herself and suffered for it, he saved her and she loved him. He loved her? Maybe cared for, at the least, he promised not to turn her. Hunters came? And she was struck mortally. He turned her to save her? He died in her place?
Ai's beginnings? Ai's beginnings.
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WTF?! how did u beat me! XD
o.o wow she sucks with water XDD thats like dang. it was kinda bitter sweet(if thats the right word^^;) for her talking about wanting to have a baby before she died :cry:
dang it essy i love u X3 XD
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What's this? Almost drowning twice and being chased by dogs? Yeesh...it's like a chapter out of Sukoshi's childhood :mon scare:
Brambles score my skin, leaving bits and pieces of myself behind with every step.
:mon barf: Well...there goes the midnight snack XD
He who rescued me when no one else had, when no one else could.
Ah!...was I right? Is the "He" a creepy Sire dude? well...okay...maybe sans the creepy part XD
Just a little more time, for his seed to grow within me.
Ah! pyro child! How I've always wanted to know!
This explains so much! :mon fyeah:
Now the chapter I'll be looking forward to reading the most will be the one where Reina gets turned! I've always wanted to know that too! It only takes place a few centuries later right? XD
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So he turned her to save her and he died in her place, but she never wanted him to save her she would of died happily for him because she loved him?
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I love raising questions and making my readers think.
Which is good or bad, depending on my thinking mood :nervous
Sometimes I just want to mindlessly read, and I can't possibly expect to do that with one of yours fics >.< I find myself having to switch my brain on in order to follow your stuff. Which is a credit to you of course, for being so marvellously plot-oriented with your stories. :wub:
So if I'm not churning out proper comments for your chapters, it's because I haven't found the motivation to turn my brain on... :lol: it happens a lot when I get back from uni and school placements. >.<
The only thing I can confirm is that Raven's tribe is slaughtered, and that he/she is the last survivor of that clan. Everything else is up in the air. :P
Yeah, I was pretty confident I'd understood that. Just the other niggling little details I'm trying to figure out. Best not to overwork my brain, not until you give more details!
You should give yourself a pat on the back, you're part of the reason for making me pick up the series again, what with talking about it on the fanfic discussion thread and all. XD
:mon cute:
*pats self on back*
The best way to get me to do something is to keep on bringing it up, though it doesn't always work. XD
:lol:
I think I heard Essy mentally say 'Oh shit!' halfway through that sentence... because there's one story she's adamantly refusing to continue... *hmph*
Onto the chapter comment!:::::
Tablet II
:OMG:
It's Ai-chan!
:bow: :bow: :bow:
And I know she's pretty much running through hell here, but I just have to establish how thrilling it is to read about her. Especially in a fic like this, of this caliber.
I have struck dead the son of the chief.
Will we be getting any more details? :shocked:
You mentioned that in passing, and for that simple reason she's raised hell upon herself? Or is there more to it?
I'm hoping for more background information here. Was Ai ever in love with the chief's son? What exactly happened between them that drove her to do such a thing?
I am not brave at all. And I don't want to die. Fierce tears streamed from my eyes, blurring my vision....
.....
Is that my mother I see, crying out in grief for me? Or my father, restrained by two others? My heart clenched, with fear and love for them....
I'm so used to reading kickass Seirei... Ai-chan so vulnerable here!
:cry:
I found Him.
I hope we get all the details of Him too...
Is he just another being turned? Or something far more ancient and powerful than that? Like... an actual Vampiric God? XD
He was also the only man I have ever loved, and will ever love.
A man, did I call him? No, more than a man, far far more. More alive than anyone I have ever known. So filled with life that he could not ever die, or so I thought.
Ai-chan loved a man? >.< lol, me does not want to accept, but let's see how it unfolds from here.
And is she glorifying him simply because he is a vampire and she had never once seen such an entity before - or is he really one to be reckoned with? I'm thinking the latter, but you never know...
He could have won. Could have fought clear, at the very least. He stopped for me, and it cost him. I didn't know. I could not know. I couldn't even breathe, much less see clearly through the red haze. All I felt was Him, warm and safe around me. Secure in his embrace, I could even have slept through it all.
A bittersweet end for her lover?
And his final act.. to turn Ai-chan? Despite his promise not to?... but now we have Seirei, so thank you to almighty Him. :bow:
And she had said that she hoped to have a little more time to perhaps bear a child... and if I remember correctly, Seirei did talk about having a child?
So perhaps almighty Him was driven in part to protect his child too?
And when I woke, nothing would ever be right again.
Poor Ai-chan. >.<
Now I can understand better why Reina had observed the 'timeless regret and sadness' in her eyes. Of course we knew Seirei had a past, but this definitely solidifies things, even if it's just a brush over what had happened.
Of course she's had to harden up after all that history. Phew.
Compressing all that drama into bite-sized pieces is pretty damn hard. orz
So you're not going to expand on that anymore?
I don't mind... it's just I still have a lot of questions, but I guess not all of them have to be answered. You're the boss here. ^___^
You did a pretty rad job of compressing all that drama though. Great writing :thumbsup
I really enjoy how you structure the flow of your story. :heart:
Thanks for the update (intriguing as always!), and LOOKING FORWARD TO MORE!
:heart: :heart: :heart:
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Lookie, it's 3 in the morning and I'm still here...which means!
Comment replies. :D
rndm: Ai's beginnings. *nods* More complications than what you've surmised, but by and large...that's sort of what happened. I'll fill in the details as we go. XD
kawaii beam: Aww you caught the baby thing. Good job. :D And thanks! :heart:
Sushi: Yeah, I'mma call you Sushi for now on. So there. :P You mean you were chased by dogs in your childhood? :lol: Sorry to bring up childhood trauma then. :P And as usual, you don't do well with gore. :P Well, the part where Reina gets turned...I suggest you go reread Gegenschein the original....I think I was fairly clear when that happened for her. :P
oddball: Pretty much. Good job. Lol.
Beecubed: Lol should I be flattered that my stories need brainpower to process? Lmao. Well, I suppose I should be happy that you need to think. :P It means I'm doing my job properly. XD And yes, you'll be getting more details as we go. I like to tell it in bits and pieces here, and there's a good reason for it. After all, these are Tablets. *hint hint* :P As for what happened to Ai, well, crime and punishment is pretty brutal in ancient civilization. Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth logic, lifted straight from Babylonian law (yes, I checked XD Code of Hammurabi ftw?!). Yeah, I'm obsessive. :lol: As for Aichan being vulnerable, well, she's still human and quite young at that. Can you blame her? :P And well, the guy she fell in love with is pretty damn awesome, and it wasn't love at first sight. Repeat, IT WAS NOT LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. Ahem. Actually, I could turn her story as a human into a standalone fic. I should. Lol. I'll expand as and when I need to here, but otherwise....god, Gegenschein is a saga. It's more than epic. orz Spanning thousands of years of history...I have a lot to write. @_@ But I can't wait to start! XD
Time to edit and post!
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Tablet III
"The tracks are still fresh, my Lord Barak. No more than a day or two. It is as you say, they lead towards the mountains. Those fiends think to lose us in the caves!"
Tanned fingers reached into the dark soil, simultaneously gripping and pushing out of it as he rose from a crouch. Hardened hands followed up to heavily muscled arms and broad shoulders, and he rose to his full height, a man in his prime.
At 29, he was a veteran, no, a survivor. Boys of 14 were veterans, in this neverending war. Petty squabbles between human kingdoms were bad enough; what they went through was a war that took generations.
The marks of war were evident on his body. Half a ear on one side, the upper edge ragged from an old wound. Puckered lines running from shoulder to torso, burn scars haphazard across his back. His mouth was twisted in a permanent scowl, courtesy of a parting gift from one of those he hunted.
The sun was harsh on his eyes as he squinted up, but he welcomed the glare. The demons did not fare well in the light, creatures born of darkness as they were. Twisted things they were, a sick leftover from an older war, here to plague mankind.
The tales spoke of their predecessors, true monsters that lost all humanity. What they hunted was far worse; monsters who mimicked humans, but monsters all the same. But for their fear of the sun, they would be the perfect wolf in sheep's clothing. He gave thanks to Shamash that the time of the abominations was over. Too many of them before had died fighting those, and now they were merely cleaning up the remnants.
Marking the position of the sun on the horizon, he contemplated the looming ridge, barely more than a little bump in the distance. It would be a hard day and night of travel on foot. Horses would be faster, but offered little stealth. He and those who traveled with him would make do without. The fiends might be faster, but their progress was limited by the day. Those tracking them would sacrifice little time over to sleep and rest, if only to close the distance while they could.
"Any word from Harran?" His voice was quiet, but not lacking in authority. His very bearing commanded immediate obedience, if not respect. The boy flushed, his still unbearded face almost awkwardly young in the face of this scarred warrior.
"No my lord. They might not have been able to catch up with us with the pace we've been setting."
There was pride in his tone, and half concealed disdain for those based within the region. Theirs was a roving team, acting both as a scouting force and an expeditionary vanguard to track and hunt down stragglers. The pace they set was staggering, as evidenced in their bodies and equipment. Their sandals were almost worn thin from all that travel, and due for replacement. Only the best went on expeditions like this. It was a hard life, and it would produce harder men who could withstand such conditions.
They jogged all around him, friends and brothers-in-arms. Always alert, they were heavily armed but lightly armored. Speed was far more essential, and armor meant little to those they hunted at any rate. The talismans they wore would have to be protection enough. Skill would even out the imbalance.
"The mines are just ahead. We might make it before nightfall, if we push." He remarked. He glanced at some of the older veterans, noting the hint of misgiving in their eyes. He knew what they were thinking.
Kestel was a mining community, extracting valuable tin from the foothills. From what he had heard, most of their town was underground, linked to their mining tunnels. The tracks from their quarry had been headed in that general direction. If they had thought to conceal themselves from the sun, there would be no better place to do so.
The whole place could be no more than a very large trap right now, but there was no way to know until they were actually there. Waiting for reinforcements was not an option. Given more time, their quarry could simply vanish into the Toros mountains and they would lose the trail. And that was simply not an option.
He whistled high-low to increase the pace, letting them know his decision by proxy. All around him, everyone instinctively checked their weapons and readied themselves. They would not be caught offguard by inattention. It was how they lived.
How they survived.
~*~*~
"My son! He went with the strangers to the mines! Please, find him!"
"Pull back, I say, PULL BACK!"
"The roof's collapsing!"
"There's another way through, from the old shafts."
"Sin's beard! What are children doing here!?"
"Everyone works in the mines. Kids do it better since they can burrow deeper with small shafts."
"Barak! One of the girls is marked!"
"They've been through here then. They might already have been tainted. We can't take any chances."
"What do you mean? They're just kids! Children!"
"I will not have them at my back when I pursue those fiends. Do it, or I will kill you myself."
"Boy...Baram. This is the sacrifice we make for the hunt. See, the fiends are no more. Those children were but a small price to pay for the lives of the whole town. This is the route I have chosen, and I will bury them with my own hands. I do not forget, and neither should you."
"Then I will bury them with you. If you would sin, then I will sin alongside you...Father."
~*~*~
The messenger from Harran caught up a day later, their ponies lathered under the sun. The small clay tablets changed hands swiftly, and Barak checked his new orders. His brows furrowed, blood creasing into the new bandage wound around his head.
"We have a new destination, boys. Strike southeast and converge with our brothers in Subartu." His mouth firmed into a thin, hard line.
"There's rumors of an Immortal near the Zagros mountains. We are going to ascertain that fact."
"And our orders?" Baram asked. His eyes were hard, taking the youthful edge off his boyish face. Barak smiled grimly, crushing the tablet to dust in one hand.
"As always: search and destroy."
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Yet another angle. This time featuring others. It will make sense in time, I swear. :D
Notes:
1) Harran - A district near the border of Syria. In its prime it was a major Assyrian city controlling the the point where the road from Damascus joins the highway between Nineveh and Carchemish. As a result it always had strategic value, even from an early date.
2) Kestel - A. probable site of Bronze Age tin mining in the Taurus Mountains in ancient Anatolia. The Kestel mine has two miles (3 km) of tunnels, many of which are only about two feet wide, just large enough to allow children to do the mining work. In one abandoned shaft, a burial of twelve to fifteen children was found, presumably killed while working in the mine. (A fact I exploited here, plot-wise.)
3) Taurus Mountains - Referenced as the Toros mountains in the narrative, using the alternative spelling. Both the Euphrates and the Tigris descend from this mountain complex into modern day Iraq.
4) Subartu - Also known as the land of Subar. Located at the Tigris, north of Babylonia. Southeast across the Taurus Mountains.
5) Zagros Mountains - The largest mountain range in Iran and Iraq. It spans the whole length of the western and southwestern Iranian plateau and ends at the Straits of Hormuz.
And here ends the geography and history lesson for today~ Courtesy of wikipedia. :lol:
Dino cookies to anyone who can guess why I chose to write this chapter from this POV!
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D: my my mind....its crushed XD i'd want to say it in the pov of one of the wolf ppl but i'd probably be far~ off XD and yay for me catching the baby thing~! X3 i cant wait to read more~
and please make sure u get enough rest ok? dont want u dieing on us,no vampier ai will come to save u if u do XD
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Hmm, not entirely sure why, but it's interesting nonetheless. For now, I will just try to take in the characters and wait for explanations on this later, as I'm sure they'll come.
I feel as though I've learned something today. :lol:
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LOL Tea chan, you can call me Sushi. I don't mind at all :P Who knows... Sukoshi may just be an anagram for Sushi girl (Sushiko) XD
Well, the part where Reina gets turned...I suggest you go reread Gegenschein the original....I think I was fairly clear when that happened for her.
Ah! I knew you were gonna say this! Total fail on my part XD I was being sarcastic about the centuries part since I know Reina's still a "baby" in modern times XD It's the who (Sire) rather than the when that I'm still after XD Unless I really did miss that part....? :huhuh Old sushi brain may have gone bad from the heat... :sweat:
The marks of war were evident on his body. Half a ear on one side, the upper edge ragged from an old wound. Puckered lines running from shoulder to torso, burn scars haphazard across his back. His mouth was twisted in a permanent scowl, courtesy of a parting gift from one of those he hunted.
All thoughts of him being a possible bishi have now all flown out the window. :mon heh:
as for the POV...we aren't suppose to you know...feel sorry for the guy are we? like when he dies? later? by the hands of Ai? XD
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This man been through the wars then (quite literally in this case it seems), some sort of vampire hunter?
Marked? Tainted? I wonder if he means bitten? he was willing to kill them even though they were children, is it rulthlessness or mercy, we will have to wait and see
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When I started reading fics in here, my first priority was Yo+Any fics, the reason why it took me a while to read your works :D And when I read Gegenschein I thought Seirei (sp?) was Miki :D
Deciphering your story is really a hard work. :lol: but makes one hooked, deep.
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Oho!
Two chapters I missed!
Hmmm, so for the the first one I missed, I take it as Ai's beginnings? Sounds very plausible and I shall think of it like that until other substantial details come forth. Ah, young love... Falling in love with a vampire will never let you stay as a human. Something always happens. Kekeke...
Weee~ More geography lessons. It's kinda fun reading things like that. I'm a big dork. Although, that's a pretty wide range you are covering. Truly the ultimate scouting party to cover that much ground.
As to why you wrote it as that POV.... To give us a idea of how this vampire hunter thinks, feels, and his resentment towards demons? Oh the irony when/if he turns into one of them.... >.>
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Lol should I be flattered that my stories need brainpower to process? Lmao. Well, I suppose I should be happy that you need to think. :P It means I'm doing my job properly. XD
Yes, you should be flattered. XD
I'm a bit of an idiotic reader at any rate, but we're talking fanfiction here. If the fanfiction makes me think, then the author is no average fanfic writer ^___^ Hopefully not because you're sprouting rubbish though, lol, as I have much faith that you know what you're talking about!
And yes, you'll be getting more details as we go. I like to tell it in bits and pieces here, and there's a good reason for it. After all, these are Tablets. *hint hint* :P
I'm glad to hear that - because so far, I'm not really piecing much together. :sweatdrop:
Tablets? Since tablets are meant to bear pretty brief messages... I can see why your chapters would be of such length and description then :yep:
As for what happened to Ai, well, crime and punishment is pretty brutal in ancient civilization. Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth logic, lifted straight from Babylonian law (yes, I checked XD Code of Hammurabi ftw?!). Yeah, I'm obsessive. :lol:
Obsessive? Or devoted? :lol: I prefer to call it devotion. I'm happy to see a writer who's very serious about her work though, enough to go through so much background work. :twothumbs
As for Aichan being vulnerable, well, she's still human and quite young at that. Can you blame her? :P
No, of course not. :nervous
I was simply making a comparison to kick-ass Seirei and the full 360 turn around from that character and how that threw me off a little. But of course, young human Ai-chan is bound to be a vulnerable one. :)
And well, the guy she fell in love with is pretty damn awesome, and it wasn't love at first sight. Repeat, IT WAS NOT LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT.
Well you're going to have to elaborate on that with more writing :lol:
Ahem. Actually, I could turn her story as a human into a standalone fic. I should. Lol. I'll expand as and when I need to here, but otherwise....god, Gegenschein is a saga. It's more than epic. orz Spanning thousands of years of history...I have a lot to write. @_@ But I can't wait to start! XD
I can't even begin to imagine how expansive this world is... must be giving you a cracking headache! :lol:
I'm truly looking forward to how 'epic' you can make this... it's all in the delivery, Essy, and I'm sure you're more than capable! :bow:
Tablet III
Ooooo... a whole new POV. It's always good to gain insight into the story through multiple perspectives, though sometimes I wish you'd give us a little more information to work with :nervous
I know I'm probably just being demanding and you've purposely left out details and all... but with pretty complicated stuff like this, I think I'd need more writing and reinforcement to really take things in.
Like for example, you started off this little chapter with a reference to 'Lord Barak' and by the end, I forgot who Barak was and had to backtrack a bit, to the beginning to confirm. Maybe that's just my goldfish memory at play though, don't worry. Lol. How about Baram? Who exactly is he? Just one of Lord Barak's followers?
I can't exactly get a good grasp on these characters. I'm hoping that it's OK that I'm not, since little has been revealed about them. But I'm wondering if you could provide more character markers so that we can keep track more easily XD
I'm assuming that these people are Hunters, but there's no guarantee that they are. I can only assume so since they seem to be heading after the vampires, these 'demonic' creatures that could not fare in the daylight.
I'm looking forward to see where this is heading, and if this going to lead to some kind of epic battle you'll be writing in depth :w00t: (because man, I love the way you write bloody action, couldn't get enough of it while reading Gegenschein... <3)
The geography and history stuff is REALLY beyond me :rofl:
You seem to be pretty knowledgeable about such things already... but thanks for the notes. I'd be interested in learning more. ^__^ :love:
Thanks for your updates as always, and I hope that you aren't suffering another bout of writer's block >.<
Judging from your latest posts in the discussion thread, you seem to be flailing a little. It's OK, Essy, there's no need to be 100% satisfied with your writing. A 50% satisfaction would probably be enough for us readers to be enjoying at 100% :lol:
Please update soon! :heart:
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Oh hey, I'm back. XD
Comment replies!
waiwai: Can I call you this? XD More mind-crushingness ahead, I believe. Have fun! :P
rndm: More to come, but less on the history lessons this time. A significant milestone here. Note that time is very significant here, but until I release the timeline, things should remain quite fuzzy. :P I like confusing people!
Sushi: Well at least I like Tea, so being called Tea chan isn't so bad. XD Reina's Sire is pretty badass. You'll see. Haha. I wasn't intending him to be a bishie. He's an old soldier of sorts, so...scars seem appropriate. :P And I just like grossing you out in general. :lol:
oddball: I'm glad you caught the implication between ruthlessness and mercy. He does mean bitten, but the mechanics of vampirism haven't really been explained so I guess things are fuzzy once again. He doesn't want the risk, but then they don't fully understand certain things...ah well. XD Needless to say they do know a lot about their prey, but there are things they cannot know, since they're, well, human. XD Let's just leave it there for now, shall we?
kRisZ: I'm glad you eventually got down to reading my fics. Haha. At least it hooked you eventually! :D
Fen: I agree, something always happens when you fall in love out of your species. :lol: But yeah, they do cover a lot of ground, and try not to think in terms of days or even weeks. A lot of this story takes years to cover, and its best to keep that in mind. :P Well it's to show how those firmly standing in the Light cast the darkest shadows...hint hint. :P
Bee: I think I know what I'm talking about...sometimes. Most of the time I just make stuff up on the spot and then it all fits together somehow. Spontaneous insanity! That manages to seem like genius. Shh, it's a secret. :lol: But I do get into a lot of random research to submerge myself into any given scenario. Then I just make things up on the fly, and it somehow links to one thing or another. It's a strange skill. XD It does feel like I'm digging myself deeper into this universe, what with all the "long stories" yet to be told. orz As for Baram, well, he's implied to be Barak's son, but generally he does play a role...for a short while. You'll see in the upcoming chapter. But well, most of these people are quite dispensable...like cannon fodder. XD I'm so evil lol. And yes, there will be an epic battle somewhere because I love writing those! :lol: As for writer's block, blame rokun for my silence for a while. He made my muse go on strike for a couple of days, but I revived her using Silent Hill OST, of all things. :lol:
Alrighty, time to edit and post!
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Tablet IV
She was like Death.
Watching her precise strokes with the reed stylus on unfired clay; then again as she speaks haltingly in civilised speech, before reverting in frustration to her own garbled dialect. These things make her seem more real, more human. Teetering between the age of youth and adulthood, it was hard to mold someone who remembered a vastly different childhood to one brought up in their ways.
But place her in combat, and she no longer wavers.
Her tribal dialect flows freely as she sways, incomprehensible save for a few words common to their languages. Where others depend on runes and rituals, she etches symbols of element and nature as she moves, her very being a conduit of energy and power. She calls, and the earth itself moves to answer her.
Their own scholars feared her, calling her a devil incarnate. The nomadic tribes of the far North were not to be trusted, they warned. Who knew what dark pacts they had forged with demons unknown?
Worse, she learns. The blocky cuneiform writing of their ancestors, as well as the more stylised etchings they had adapted to. They teach her about the power of numbers, symbols, and the elements they represent. She learns, and she adapts them. She shortens lengthy rituals and merges them with her own tribal knowledge. Direction, meaning, symbolism; she takes the Trinity and enshrines them into forms of power.
So they thank her, even as they feared her. So young, yet a wild talent. Envy could have been a motivator. The ones who fought on the field had fewer qualms, seeing how her talents benefited them directly, those who had to bleed and die out in combat. But even they had moments of doubt, seeing how easily she took to killing, terminating with a ruthless efficiency that even hardened warriors took years to achieve.
Physical combat remained her one weakness in the early years, though her magical skill was beyond doubt. Quietly though, she trained with the one who picked her up in the first place. She never resisted the training, but never quite complied with their doctrine either. She did not question orders, but she never quite followed them exactly as they wanted her to, though if forced to question, no one could deny that she had, in fact, followed instructions to the letter. It made for an interesting, if frustrating, quandary. They had grown to need her expert insight into speeding up the development of runes as a practical combat application, but doubted her loyalty to them.
After all, her clan was slaughtered during an all-out battle between their forces and the fiends they hunted. Caught in the crossfire, so to speak. It was a mystery as to how she even survived at all. It was not too difficult to imagine that she had witnessed the carnage from the beginning, and worse, that she remembered.
But if she did, she did not seek revenge against those who had a hand in the destruction of everything she had held dear. Dark eyes held their secrets, watching impassively and soaking up new knowledge and experiences like a sponge.
The only flicker of anything resembling hate was at the moment of killing. The instant she ended the life of anything, fiend or human, it was there where her eyes became fiery and alive, a seething rage that threatened to devour all that stood before her held barely in check.
And then the subject dies, and she is calm once more. Impassive, like a statue.
Like Death.
Or as they have come to call her, Raven. She still wears the dark feathers, taken fresh from the great scavengers that roam battlefields, her namesake. She seems amused by the irony, even as she braids them into her hair.
Over the years she learns to smile, laugh, and talk with greater facility. Equally, also, her prowess in battle grows as quickly, though she never did as well under the searing Anatolian sun, only coming truly alive in the night, bathed in the gentler light of the moon.
Ironic, perhaps, since their prey was only ever more active at night. Useful, too, since men tread fearfully in the cold and the dark. The chill never bothered her at night; the tundra she was born on had been colder, so much so that it almost never snowed; it was usually too cold and dry to.
In the end, Baram reflected, it was only so much easier for those who stood in shadows to fall into it. He believed that he was of Light, but Raven was unmistakably a child of the Night. He had seen her dance on nights of the new moon, a silent ritual of herself to herself.
Privately, he feared her. But the Light needed what she had to give, so very much. He only hoped he would not live to see her turn on them, as he suspected she eventually would. Those dark eyes held too many secrets, full lips hiding promises never to be whispered, only ever hinted at.
She was beautiful, he realized. But so very dangerous. A weapon he had shaped with his own hands, plucked from a ravaged battlefield. Shadows stirred at the edges of his memories, intangible hands blurring between reality and dreams.
Years have passed, the betrayal yet to come, but the Past never stayed where it was. It caught up one fine day, like a summer storm. Reckless, unstoppable, wrathful.
Raven returns at sunset to find yet another ravaged battlefield, and a stranger in the middle of it all. She does not understand, seeing only the end, and not the beginning.
This time she is no longer passive, but then again, she never was.
She holds her little brother in her arms, his throat slashed out with a blade. A part of her collapses in grief; another, darker side takes control, her fingers dipping into the lifeblood of her kin, weaving and murmuring.
She calls, and the earth answers.
Anyone who approached with killing intent was instantly obliterated, their minds destroyed, turning their weapons on themselves. She sits silently in that circle, surrounded by the dead.
She acts, but is flung away with a single sweep, crashing against a broken wall. Her breath catches, something twisting deep within her. A crushing sensation, then suffocation.
She coughs, a deep, gurgling sound that sounds wrong. Blood sputters from her lips, joining the mass of it on the floor. She falls, surrounded by the dead.
Blood pools all around her, most of it not hers. She does not remember the interval, just as she has blanked out what happened before. She only remembers the pain, and the stranger.
Intense red eyes, burned into her vision. One more thing she could not forget.
Should have died, should have died, should have died.
But she didn't, and the nightmare begins anew.
First priority: hunt down the bitch that killed me. Yeah, would have died. Hell, should have died. Damn friend should have been less softhearted. Hell, I should have just killed the idiot the first time. Now I'm alive and...what? I'm hungry! Shut the hell up! They should all die, and I should have killed them myself. And damn, that tastes awful. Yeah, priority, kill the bitch that got to them before I could. Damn her.
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Perspective shifts might be a tad confusing. I quite like how it turned out though. Free writing has it uses, though I did have to edit a great deal towards the end.
No notes to make for now, since there aren't that many things of relevance, save for the reference to cuneiform writing. Think pictograms, or hieroglyphics. That would have been the ancient Sumerian script. Like I said though, not a big deal (for now).
What do you guys think of Raven though? :D I'm curious. :P
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lol u can call me waiwai if u want^^ whatever floats ur boat~! X3
and u crushed my mind again! :mon duh: for some reason i think raven's miki or like some reincartant of reina XD or some evil twin of ai...ile i seriously dont know XD
raven sounds like a ticking time bomb though wouldnt wanna be around her when she exploded :mon curtain:
great job as usual~!
:gmon bang:
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I rather like Raven. She sounds like a certain someone, but then again, not. Hmm, I'm trying to work out who is who, but I still think I'm missing one or two fairly large puzzle pieces here. Once again, I'll reserve my other thoughts until I have more to go on.
You have succeeded in the confusingness, Essy-sama! :lol:
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And now I'm confused. Confuddled.
It was all good until you started changing POV around on the fly. Now I sit here, staring at the computer screen... dazed... head nodding up and down... eyes half-lidded.... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
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Hmm Raven is definalty a dangerous character, she must be if Baram is scared of her, found on a batllefield hint's to a vicious past, I did wonder if perhaps Raven was a vampire or becoming one and Baram used her to gain information on other vampires.
Will baram regret what he created(possibly) however?
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I think I know what I'm talking about...sometimes. Most of the time I just make stuff up on the spot and then it all fits together somehow. Spontaneous insanity! That manages to seem like genius. Shh, it's a secret. :lol:
:mon speechless:
You sure have had me fooled... :lol:
But I do get into a lot of random research to submerge myself into any given scenario. Then I just make things up on the fly, and it somehow links to one thing or another. It's a strange skill. XD
It's the sign of a skilled writer... ^___^
If your imagination and ability to weave things together = great story, what else matters? Rejoice! :twothumbs
It does feel like I'm digging myself deeper into this universe, what with all the "long stories" yet to be told.
Which I really look forward to reading about!
Although I do have to admit I'm more excited about finding out what's going to happen next with current Seirei, Reina and the others... :sweatdrop:
I'm just confuzzled about what's going on right now with all this history >.<
It's still interesting to read of course, but I guess I'm waiting for the point where I'm not asking a million questions by the end of each chapter :lol:
And yes, there will be an epic battle somewhere because I love writing those! :lol:
:onioncheer:
As for writer's block, blame rokun for my silence for a while. He made my muse go on strike for a couple of days, but I revived her using Silent Hill OST, of all things. :lol:
Eh? Rokun did? Nande?
Is this story that ominous? XD (I can only imagine the Silent Hill OST being hella creepy >.<).
But yeah, music inspiration FTW! :yep:
Tablet IV
OK, you really have managed to make me all :dizzy:
I know longer have any certainties, now I just feel like everything I'm making = assumptions T____T
I'm hoping we get some radically enlightening chapter soon, otherwise I'm going to feel completely lost. I hope you're not planning to keep up with all these question-raising chapters for the rest of the story, until the very end. Which might not even make any sense XD
So. Here is my attempt at making sense of things. Every thought at the moment is very tentative...
After all, her clan was slaughtered during an all-out battle between their forces and the fiends they hunted. Caught in the crossfire, so to speak. It was a mystery as to how she even survived at all. It was not too difficult to imagine that she had witnessed the carnage from the beginning, and worse, that she remembered.
Raven. So Raven is a girl. I thought it was a he at first XD
Raven is an extremely awesome name, so it isn't hard to think of her as somebody very cool. A mystery as to how she even survived - I'm thinking she was turned by someone. Either the almighty He who turned Ai, or Ai herself. But then this conflicts with Baram's "weapon that he had shaped with his own hands" deal. So I'm not exactly sure WHAT Raven is. The Who is a little more clear. Actually, scratch that. Even the Who about her is unclear. :lol:
But if she did, she did not seek revenge against those who had a hand in the destruction of everything she had held dear. Dark eyes held their secrets, watching impassively and soaking up new knowledge and experiences like a sponge.
She really does sound like she could be Ai-chan. Is she? Perhaps Ai-chan is a split personality or something xD
Argh, I don't know. This also goes against my other assumptions. >.<
The only flicker of anything resembling hate was at the moment of killing. The instant she ended the life of anything, fiend or human, it was there where her eyes became fiery and alive, a seething rage that threatened to devour all that stood before her held barely in check.
And then the subject dies, and she is calm once more. Impassive, like a statue.
Like Death.
Raven sounds awesome. Like, Seirei cool. She's not driven by murderous desire to avenge, yet she still rains down upon enemies like Death itself. Death is objective, but when it acts, it can be ruthless. That's the impression I get. Something to be respected. :shocked:
She only remembers the pain, and the stranger.
Intense red eyes, burned into her vision. One more thing she could not forget.
Should have died, should have died, should have died.
But she didn't, and the nightmare begins anew.
Again, this makes me believe she was turned. Maybe by the Almighty He (before he perished). Or maybe Ai. In the first little prose you posted in this thread, somebody seemed to be talking to this Raven, and says this: "I see Him every time I close my eyes. Do you?"
If 'He' turned Raven, I can understand why she would be able to see him. But then if Ai turned Raven, perhaps because of the strong connection, Raven could see him too. ???
First priority: hunt down the bitch that killed me. Yeah, would have died. Hell, should have died. Damn friend should have been less softhearted. Hell, I should have just killed the idiot the first time. Now I'm alive and...what? I'm hungry! Shut the hell up! They should all die, and I should have killed them myself. And damn, that tastes awful. Yeah, priority, kill the bitch that got to them before I could. Damn her.
This was a bit confusing. Raven talking about Ai-chan?
They were somehow 'friends' before Raven was turned by her?
..........
:gyaaah:
Essy, this is really distressing!
It might be OK for you because you made all this up in your head, but I wonder if you've overestimated the lot of us. I'm not sure about the other readers, but I'm just... :panic:
Lol, ok anyway...
Please update soon and begin clearing up this mess! :heart:
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I'm insane, but I had to finish it. 4am! I have to wake up in 6 hours! Urk.
Comment replies first.
waiwai: More mindcrushing. I think I'm taking my sadistic tendencies a little too far. XD Ticking time bomb is an interesting analogy. Hm, worth a thought.
rndm: I rather like Raven too. I think I made her too epic, but well, the story needs an epic person when Ai is still all...noobish. XD Good, you're confused! :D Let's hope I can unravel that successfully with coming chapters...
Fen: You need more sleep. Hell, I need more sleep. :lol:
oddball: I guess I must have been too vague. Oh well, can't expect people to read my mind. All will be revealed in time I suppose. XD
Bee: There you are. XD I feel a little bad about confuzzling everyone with the history, but I kind of wanted to straighten everything up in my head. Even if it makes no sense to anyone else. Hm. I guess I'm too weird to be read easily... As for Raven's identity...is it bad if I hide who she is all the way until she actually makes an appearance in Gegenschein proper? :lol: I'm evil. XD After all, there's no reason for her to take a Japanese name until the time period and location fits...:P Ok now I'm just being mean. :lol: Raven does feel very similar to Aichan, doesn't she? Yet totally different on some level. You'll see. XD
Upcoming chapter is confuzzling even to me. Oops?
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Tablet V
It seemed like a very long dream. Different places, different people. Widely separated in time.
They speak, but it all seems so far away. She watches, like an old movie on rerun through an ancient television set. Cracked images, fuzzy sounds. Like another life, maybe her own...who knew?
There once was a man born of a God, who should have been a man, but was not. He outlived his own mother, and then forgot even her face as time passed. His father moved on to other lands and other women. He might have had siblings that still lived. He would never know for sure.
There was a woman, born so long ago that she has forgotten from whence she came. She looks like no one in that time, and yet everyone looks like her, perhaps some distant descendant of her people, long lost in the sands of time.
As all stories go, the man met the woman, and things happened. As in most stories, things did not end well. She left, he followed, she did not return to him. He waited for her, for he had all the time in the world. He would never die, and neither would she.
Or so he thought.
He lived. She didn't. He stayed at her grave for some time, watching the ridge crumble into a hill, the little village where she settled flourishing into a thriving outpost. Time meant little to someone who had an infinite amount of it.
He watched the humans of the village as one would observe wild flocks in the field. Detached, vaguely interested at times, but never an active part of their lives. On occasion he crossed paths with the odd human, which was quite enough for a small legend to spring up about his protective presence over the village. As his father was, he was venerated as a God, and grew stronger from the sacrifices they brought to him.
Ea, or Lord, they called him. Too similar to his father, the infamous Enki, worshipped across the continent. For all they might have been father and son, they looked as if they could have been brothers, had they ever been placed side by side.
It seemed like he could stay there forever, away from the real world, where he would have been called to battle again. He had fought to protect humans many many years ago, but now all he wanted was to protect a memory he cherished. There were others who could take his place in the war. He would not be called out again.
For he had failed to protect what was important to him once, and no longer felt qualified to protect the rest of mankind. One life he failed to save, that had changed him.
Another life he would save, that would change him again.
It was no more than a passing gesture. A mother in labor, pained but determined. The newborn, whimpering and mewling, then becoming still. Him passing by, as the mother cursed the gods and prayed for salvation at the same time. He had been intrigued enough to intervene.
The baby lived. A fierce bawling from those tiny lungs, eyes once dull becoming bright and lively. He had a peculiar sense that it would not be the last he saw of that small child.
It wasn't. Personally, he had never had to save a human more than once, given how he had never crossed paths with them more than once, and even if he did, it usually took place in less critical circumstances. Thus when he fished an unusual prize out of the river, he was vaguely amused by the fact that the little girl dangling limply in his arms was actually familiar. Blood called to him, and he closed her head wounds almost absently, feeling a strange kinship to one brought back once by him before.
She fell into his lap again, this time visibly older (to his vague surprise, he could never be sure how long or how short a time it took for humans to grow up), but still young as a human. Battered and bruised, but not beaten. Definitely not.
He was not sure why he saved her again, but he certainly hadn't been trying to seek her out at all. Who was he to ignore the dictates of fate, if she kept on finding her way to his side, even without her own consciousness?
In the long march of time he had endured, he had always seen humans as candles in a breeze. Burning brightly for a short time, then extinguished in a sudden gust. Ephemeral existences, yet to be respected for their struggle for life as their mortal coil burned to a close.
This tiny young woman - girl no longer, though still small - was yet another one of those wavering flames. Plunged deep into darkness, but burning all the more brightly for it. She was so full of life, something he himself had been lacking for ages.
It reminded him of her, the one he had failed to protect. The one who was never his, and who left him behind in a world that could not accept his existence. Their eyes held the same fire, a desire for more than what life had given them.
Yet this girl knew nothing of the world around her, while his love had been worn out by it. One a freshly blank slate, the other remade over and over until it fell apart.
It was a new beginning of sorts. To one who knew so little, every new experience was a joy, and it lit his heart to see her absorb his lessons, trying so very hard whenever something stumped her -- which was often. She was plain in so many ways, but she never gave up in spite of that.
He found that he enjoyed teaching, even as his father had before him. Reading and writing, basic mathematics, natural sciences, even how to read the stars above. He told her about the world he had seen, about places and people, the great events that changed the course of history in his lifetime. And she listened.
He did wonder why she stayed for as long as she did. True, he had knowledge beyond what most others had to give, but he would have thought that she would want to see the world he described to her. He even asked her once.
Her answer...what was her answer? The images wavered. You seem so lonely. I don't want to be alone. Promise me something...
There was a promise. What did he promise? She asked, or did he ask something of her? No, wait, where...
Regret, fear, guilt. I'm so sorry, my small one. Did I hurt you?
Then relief, hope, and a tiny spark of joy. The images, no, the impressions blurred once more. A confusing whirl of emotions, sometimes up, then down. Tightly wound and compressed, fading in and out of sight.
They were reflected in each other's eyes, every moment an eternity as they joined together under the stars.
The same glade is burning, memories dissipating into smoke as noise turned to deadly static. Anger, indignation, adrenaline as the invaders were mown down like wheat.
A pained roar, not of injury, but of loss.
Hands reaching for each other, grasping tightly. The world faded.
And then there was blood.
~*~*
Pain!
Hands clawing mindlessly at the source, scrabbling fingers losing purchase on the slick surface. A grunt as a grip was secured, and heaved.
The shriek froze a vole in mid-nibble, beady eyes blinking to assess the presence of a new threat. The sudden clatter of a bloody shaft not three feet away startled it into movement, long claws throwing up dust as it scurried down a hole and resolved not to come out until the danger had passed.
Dust and sand scattered as the creature moaned, rolling into a low crouch. One hand remained pressed tightly against the abdomen, fingers searching for the offending item. The splinters fell out in a spurt of blood, even as the bronze tip was finally ripped out with an agonized howl.
Pain. Hurt. Danger.
The mind was fogged, only the most basic imperatives standing out clearly. The world sharpened and came into focus as eyes blinked out at the surroundings. The azure sky seemed to stretch out endlessly, and the creature caught sight of a hawk in flight, far above.
Lines and color felt surreal; same, yet different, somehow. It was as if someone had rearranged the very structure of the picture, without changing the placement of anything within it. The effect was simultaneously familiar and alien, the mundane becoming abstract in an instant.
There was sound; the twitching whiskers of the frightened vole like whispers in the sun. Overhead, the fierce hunting cry of the hawk, a piercing shriek that should have been too distant to hear, but was heard all the same.
And the smell! Blood, the creature's own, and something else. Dead blood, decaying. It was...unpleasant. The breeze brought slight relief, along with the smell of fresh grass and ashes...
Movement! Eyes flickered to track it instinctively, the spot of white grey barely visible against the slightly darker shale of the sheer slope. Another instinct struck.
Hunger. Food.
Thought flowed into action with barely a register of it having being thought at all. Like a wraith, the creature sprung on the hapless goat, hands crushing the heavily muscled neck of the big mountain goat in a single flash.
Kill. Eat.
The blood was warm. The creature shuddered all over as it spasmed, still holding on to its prey. Every single muscle in its body seemed to burn intensely, but as quickly as it came, it was over.
Fat drops of liquid fell to join the red mess pooled around the dead goat, and there was a moment of consciousness as the creature touched its own face. It came away wet, and the stains stayed.
Tears. The stirring of something that might have been memory, almost wavering into an awakening of self...
Firepainfearblooddarkscareddon'tgodon'tleavemekillthemallkillkillkillkillkill
All rationality fled in the face of terror, and the creature howled its distress. Better to forget, better to not remember. Better to be a beast and live unaware of the true horror.
A beast lived without knowledge of the end that would come. And for the beast for which the end would never come? Perhaps it would simply live, until something changed it all.
~*~*~
It felt like I was sleeping inside myself for a very long time. So long that I forgot myself, and that was a brief happiness to be savored. I never wanted to wake up to a world I didn't want to face. A world to which I didn't belong, which would reject my existence.
If I slept, if I dreamt, at least I would not be alone.
But I could not close my eyes forever. When I woke, everything fell apart once more.
I woke to Death, with me as Executioner. I never thought to kill, but it came like second nature. Everything I touched seemed to wither before me, and I despaired.
Nothing else left in this world, nothing I could do but kill. I could do that. I needed something to hold on to. I needed...
========================================================================================
Some answers, more questions. I think I'm going nuts.
Extremely moody now. Will go away and hide until it blows over.
Bah.
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u did it again! :panic: XD i seriously feel lost yet i get it at the same time XD
like that god was the same one that saaved ai like a kajilion times? and thats all i got...i think XD
the 2nd part's maybe ai? idk! :panic:
u did save me from going crazy out of boredom though..i desperately needed to read something XD
and ur not goinf nuts...ur just insainly creative X3
and i hope ur bad mood goes away soon...plus GET SOME REST!*hugs*
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Have read, will reply later.
:heart: :heart: Essy-sama~!
EDIT: Okay, the first part is Him, the one who saved Ai and turned her and loved her. Seems like fate to me. Well, that was my first impression, but I had to go back and reread the other parts first and I just didn't have time last night. The second part, Ai? After she turns, she's lost. She has no Master to guide her, so she looses it and does nothing except follow her instincts and try to forget her pain. Bam, big puzzle piece right there(if I'm right, of course). I think the other piece is Raven. Was the monster that killed her and the hunters Ai? Did Ai turn her?! Or am I totally imagining that?
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Hmm I must admit I am thinking the same as Rndmn here, though I don't think it was Ai that turned Raven but I supose it could be, all confused now! :doh:
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Tablet IV
I'm thinking raven is Ai
Tablet V
I'm thinking that girl is Ai too...
So sue me :D
In the end, I'm thinking those two are different persons but connected in one way or another.
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Must have broke most people with the last chapter. Only 4 comments. Ah well. Beggars can't be choosers.
Comment replies! You know the drill!
waiwai: Yes, the god that saved Ai a kajillion times. Somehow I like the way you put it. :lol: Sorry about the brain trauma, but it was necessary? lol. Well the upcoming one is a bit more straightforward. Just a teensy bit. XD
rndm: You're right on the dot for most of it. Note I said "most of it". XD I won't tell you what you got wrong, but you did get the gist of it, so good job. :D It's a pretty big puzzle piece though. And I must apologize for all the skipping around in time I do in this story ^^;
oddball: It doesn't have to be her. Well, you'll see. XD
kRisZ: You have Ai on the brain. :lol: Not that I blame you, I do too. :lol: You're right about them being connected though. It's a major part of the themes surrounding this prequel. I can only hope I portray it well. Thanks for reading and commenting!
Thanks to all those who commented! Really appreciate the effort you guys took to do it. :D
Time to edit and post!
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Tablet VI
Raven supposes that no matter what happens, she keeps moving on.
People died. They keep on dying. She keeps going.
She died. She kept on going even then (through no fault of her own).
She suspects it's easier to deal with things if she just kept moving. That way, she wouldn't have to think, to consider, to really contemplate how events affected her. Leaping from one challenge to the next, testing herself continually and never stopping.
Being blessed, or cursed, to see the reality of the world as it is could be a major pain in the ass. Realizing just how insignificantly puny one was in the general scheme of things made moving on a great deal easier.
Raven supposed that it was the only way she knows how to live. Always in motion, always unaffected by the events around her. She was, and would be. What she is, though, changes and remains the same all the time, every time.
She chases that which does not wish to be caught, if only to give herself something to do.
It was only until after she caught up that she realized the difference between them.
It was also then that she realized she had found something to do for the rest of her life, long as it would probably be, whether she liked it or not.
Oh well, at least it should keep things interesting.
~*~*~
Wrong. It was all wrong.
She drops the head in disgust, barely noticing as it hit the ground with a soft plop. Her bare feet squelches around in the red muck, casually kicking aside a fallen limb as she stalks like a hungry predator around the camp.
The kicked over embers were sputtering, a cooking pot overturned next to it. She had interrupted their noonday meal, walking in as innocent as anything, dressed in rags like a lowly slave. Their hard-eyed glances had followed her, with suspicion in more than one eye, but none of them had suspected her of being the monster she was.
After all, they had been expecting attacks in the night. Their customary prey never did frequent the day, they couldn't. Little over a century since the last of the true abominations had perished, and the customary caution had faded over the relatively short period of time. Most people just wanted to treat it like a terrible nightmare, over and done with.
Hell, she wanted it to be a horrible nightmare she could wake up from. But no, she had to live this nightmare. She was the nightmare. There was no escape. Not for her, or for those she hunted.
Wrong. This was the wrong group. Frustrated, she stamps the dying embers out in a fit of childish anger, heedless of the seared skin...which knits together in moments. so never mind that.
As suddenly as her anger had flared, she freezes. Without warning, she falls into a crouch, rippling fits travelling through her shaking form. She snarls, her fangs showing clearly for once, even as she struggles to control her spasming body.
Blood... Unthinkingly, she latches onto the nearest corpse, lapping at the torn throat. Her rampage had not ended so long ago as to allow the blood to start coagulating, so she was able to stomach a few mouthfuls before hurling the body away in distaste.
Images swim before her eyes, a whirl of impressions and even emotions of the man's last moments just screaming at her...and she saw herself, a bloodstained demon, the last thing he saw, before she had torn them out in a frenzy.
She is almost sick right there on that killing field, but sets her jaw firmly and rises, letting the images wash over her as if they meant nothing. A cold feeling runs through her, and she closes her eyes, reaching out with her other senses...
Hard eyes snap open, a complete change from the almost berserk fury that had raged in the same orbs just seconds before. There is a coldness there, an unemotional air to her demeanor. Slowly, she cracks her neck, first one way, then the other. There was a sinuous quality to her movements, like a coiled serpent ready to strike...
And then she was no longer standing there. Instead, she had one man raised half in the air, the poor bastard somehow having managed to escape her killing rage the first time. He was already wounded, naturally, but had not tried risking another suicide attempt at her after barely saving his own skin after her initial attack. Playing dead was all very well and good, even convincingly as it was attempted: he had fallen in his own blood, and his dead comrades had fallen over him. But she still sensed him somehow. Damnations.
She eyes him with a cold curiosity, almost distant, as if she isn't choking him with one hand at the same time. He flails weakly, but she had not tightened her grip so painfully as to completely cut off his breathing...or for that matter, to sever his head from his spine either.
"De..mon..." He manages to squeeze out painfully, wheezing. Her eyes narrow infinitesimally, as does her grip. He tries to get a grip on her deceptively slender arm, but his left hand would not obey -- the small bones in it had been broken earlier.
"It is good you still live." The voice that came from her was raspy from disuse, but surprisingly normal for all that. "It would have been...troublesome...without any clue where to go next if you had all died."
"You'll get...nothing...from me." She had slackened the grip just enough for him to speak, and he gathered his courage to defy this monster before him. He had no doubt that she would kill him either way, there was no mercy from the likes of such abominations. But he would not be of use to her. He would not.
A dry chuckle, more mechanical than heartfelt, as if it were a learned response. There was something inhuman in those dark eyes, made worse by the visage splashed in the blood of his brothers. He had thought the girl beautiful when she first collapsed at the edge of their camp, but there was none of it present right now.
"Boy..." Her voice was low, almost like the purr of a great cat. "I never intended to ask in the first place."
She lets go of his throat, and even as he is falling, he grabs the dagger at his belt with his right hand, intent on landing at least one blow on her before he met his fate. He stabs mere air where she was just standing no more than a blink ago, and she is suddenly behind him.
Fingers slick with gore clap over his face, holding him still as he felt the much smaller girl kick him at the back of his knees. The limb gave way with a sickening crack, and he was forced to the ground.
"The hunters at Zagros...the God-slayers...where are they?"
The hiss was barely human, and he could barely focus on anything other than the incredible pain from his newly broken knee, when a surprisingly gentle touch to his neck made him forget it entirely.
"Everything you know...give it to me." She whispers, barely audible, before plunging her fangs into his jugular. His eyes dilate, from fear, pain, or even pleasure...it was hard to tell.
Conscious thought, memory, emotions, impressions...the veritable maelstrom of the human mind howling into her as she fed. With ruthless precision, she wrestles order from the chaos, calling on memory that was not hers for aid.
All she needed was a direction, nothing more. Better if he knew exactly where, but she wasn't going to risk draining him dry. She didn't need or want his mind cluttering hers up. Already, what she had taken would take days, if not weeks, to fade from her consciousness.
North. Another band. Another hunt. She drops him carelessly, but not without breaking his neck first. She never left any survivors. She wasn't going to start now.
Already the fury was coming back. Her calm receded as a boiling rage came to the surface, seething. She would stop for nothing, spare no one, until she had her revenge.
So many dead...I will take my price for the ones you vermin took from me.
Unconsciously, she was rubbing her belly, but the action only fanned her rage as another half-formed memory whispered its existence.
"I will kill you all..." Dark eyes solidified into a deep red, even as rationality faded away.
It was not a threat. It was a promise.
The sun shone overhead in mocking benediction.
=========================================
Not much of actual fighting, but it's hard to have a good fight when it's so one sided. Gore though, just for Sushi. :twisted:
EDIT: Oooh I got a new page. :D
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lol im glad u liked the way how i said it lol that's how it felt to me^^; and i guess it was ^^ yay for straight-forwardness~!
now raven..i still dont know who the hell she is XDDD
the 2nd part....ai is one hell of a bad ass vampier person lady girl! XD the part when she goes all spazzy for blood really creeped me up...in a good way? XD
and the army guy was like getting his dream come true yet nightmare XD who would think that the pretty girl would be the one to kill u AND the army? that must suck.
and lastly the part where she rubbed her tummy made me go :cry: poor ai-chan!D:
great job and dont worry about the commonters k? im sure more ppl are reading but are LURKING! if u get vampier ai on them i'm sure they'll come out XD
is everything ok now btw? i hope ur bad mood's gone...unless this triggered it^^; did that make sense? lol
EDIT-holly cow this was my 600th post! well im happy it was on here so this post is for u essy^^
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Now I'm 99% sure Raven is Ai :yep: And the other girl from the previous chapter could be Reina's ancestor.
Lovely chapter, it's like I was watching a TV.
I need some vinegar and spices or a straw will do too :grin: Eww :grin:
The hiss was barely human, and he could barely focus on anything other than the incredible pain from his newly broken knee, when a surprisingly gentle touch to his neck made him forget it entirely.
"Everything you know...give it to me." She whispers, barely audible, before plunging her fangs into his jugular. His eyes dilate, from fear, pain, or even pleasure...it was hard to tell.
A pervert victim XD
I love those lines though, it's like I was the one being bitten by AI of course :D
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I fell like I don't have any idea anymore, feels as though Ai could be Raven and Raven could be Ai while at the same time being completely separate, except that they are connected. I just can't pinpoint where exactly. @_@ Need the last piece!
But I do so love a good gore scene, especially with Ai in the middle.
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Right, I'm thinking that Raven is Ai, but perhaps nit at the same time, perhaps raven is a part of Ai, or perhaps ASi is a part of Raven?
Why do I really feel that i would not like to be a 'god slayer' right about now?
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Yoohoo I'm back. Anyone miss me?
Comment replies first.
waiwai: Wow your 600th post for me! :heart: Thanks. :D I'm glad you liked badass vampire Ai. :D And lol I've come to accept that it's gonna be just you guys commenting. That's ok, it's better than nothing. At least you guys show you care. :D
kRisZ: Lol I would like to know your logic for the Raven = Ai conclusion. XD Hehe being bitten by Ai isn't such a bad way to go~
rndm: *pats poor confused rndm* You're very perceptive really. XD I couldn't have put it better than you have. Haha.
oddball: You'll see. Different sides of the same coin? Yet because they are different, much difference? Hm. Wait. Let's not get confused now. XD And nope, you definitely don't want to be a god slayer right now. XD
*yawns* Damn, I stayed up too late writing this, then I passed out. Haha. Had to edit a little when I woke up, but here's the new chapter!
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Tablet VII
The fire danced on one outstretched fingertip, casting light and shadow all around the scorched ground. The hand closed, smothering the flames into a shower of sparks that fell onto cold stone at her feet.
"Fascinating..." The whisper was almost reverent, even as she manipulated the elements as if it was child's play to her. A tiny cyclone spun wildly in the middle of her palm.
There was a nervous cough in the dark behind her. A dark presence, almost undetectable, yet oddly familiar. She did not turn around, knowing that her Master meant her no harm.
"You're taking to this very well." Master's voice was quiet. Raven shook her head. It was hard to think of her as anything but Master nowadays, but she knew what her true name was.
Summer, that's right. Her name means Summer.
"I miss the sun." She stated just a bit petulantly. Blowing lightly, she sent her mini-cyclone spinning across the ground, watching as it tossed a few pebbles around before falling apart.
"I am sorry for keeping you from the afterlife." Master, no, Summer sounded genuinely regretful. Raven recalled that the people of the Two Lands held great store by their gods and the life beyond. Her own people had venerated the land, and death merely meant a return to the spirits of the land. The fact that she would not be returning to the land did not bother her as much as it probably should have, though it was difficult to explain to Summer about that.
"What's done is done." Raven shrugged. "If you cannot undo it, then don't apologize for it."
Summer sat down next to her. The elder vampire cut a small figure, almost overshadowed by Raven's larger frame. As Raven kindled yet another flame on her palm, Summer reached out and smothered it, the flames charring her skin. Their hands clapsed, Raven could feel exactly how her Master's skin knitted together quickly, leaving no evidence of the burn.
"You insist on chasing the Wild One then?" Summer's voice was quiet, but did not hold approval or disapproval. Raven closed her eyes, thinking.
"I don't like being beaten." A cold flutter of wind whispered at her ear, and Raven listened. Next to her, Summer raised one hand to cradle her Child's face lightly, bringing their foreheads together.
"It will bring you to grief." Summer murmured. Raven hesitated for a moment, then reached up to grasp her Master's wrist. Her hold was gentle, though her gaze was fierce.
"I am already in darkness." Her voice was quiet. Summer looked stricken for a moment, but Raven continued on, leaning into her Master's touch.
"But you are with me."
Summer smiled.
"I am with you."
~*~*~
There are secrets in the dark. Summer once belonged to the day, but Raven had always been a denizen of shadow. Things only the day knew, but did not share with her counterpart...
Summer did not want her Raven to catch up to the Wild One, even as her own instincts yearned to hunt that abomination down. It was what she had once been called to do, not so very long ago. It made no sense. The last of them had been exterminated in the last great hunt. There should not be any left. She would know, she watched it end.
That thing was dangerous. The ones she had seen before were all half-mad, horribly deformed in mind and body. It had been a mercy to end their lives for them, brought back incompletely as they were. As it were, they had been a plague on mankind.
A plague that was supposed to have ended a hundred years ago. Yet here was another. It only took one to spread the disease. Even as they followed in this destroyer's footsteps, Summer had personally checked to make sure that none of the victims were infected. So far, the monster had only killed, but not turned anyone else.
Raven had taken to her new life much better than Summer had originally. It made the older vampire wonder just how warped her fledgling was. There was an edge to Raven, a side that was just begging to spit destiny in the face and then stomp all over it. This mad quest was but one sign. Raven was certainly not as stable as she appeared to be.
We're all a little mad inside. Summer knew it, saw it in herself. She had once tried to drown herself in the Nile, but that had been a futile effort. Nothing less than burning under the sun would do, she supposed. She might have sought death, but yet she clung to life, even this miserable simulcrum of it, harder than anyone else.
Summer wondered just how mad she really was, even as she deliberately led Raven astray. She would not let her fledgling meet a true fiend without ascertaining just what it was up to.
To meet with a horned viper armed with little more than a stick and her own wits...that was how she felt as she approached. Such implements were sufficient in the hands of the skilled, but would she prove herself worthy of the task?
Mad, indeed. I must be mad.
She went expecting a monster. She left behind her a woman in mourning. What is justice indeed, if it were to persecute those who only wanted to be left alone? Ma'at forgive her, but it was only right that the injured sought redress for what was owed her. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. Blood for blood.
Still, right or no, that child needed to be watched. It was her last duty to the mad God that had raised them to fight this evil. The moment she crossed the line, she would have to be terminated.
It was the only way.
=====================================
Notes:
1) Two Lands - One of the old names for ancient Egypt.
2) Ma'at - Goddess of Justice in Egypt. Also know as "the Rule" which governs the lives of men, so that justice is present in all that they do.
Been reading quite a bit about Egypt to get stuff right. I'm not sure if it's wholly accurate, but hey, the thought counts!
As usual, Gegenschein the series spans across both time and space. It's never going to be confined to one era or one region. There's always a global side to it, I suppose. I wrote myself into an epic, but I couldn't be happier about that. :lol:
As usual, a big hug to all those who commented. As for the lurkers, have a police baboon. (Yes they actually have police baboons in Ancient Egypt. Shocking, isn't it?) Crocodiles all!
...yeah I'm crazy. :lol:
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my goodness dont pass out on us!D:*hugs* we need u to live ok?
ok i wanna say summer's officially abe XD idk why but i shall XD and i still dont know who raven is but i guess the 2 of them are looking for ai? gah~ idk idk~*rolls around*
and yes~ im happy ur happy and glad that we care X3 ur an awesome writer essy u deserve some awesome props~^^
cant wait for the next one~ :heart:
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Summer and Raven. I love the interaction between them, very, hmm, famiiar, in more ways than one.So what exactly do they hunt? Like a gnarled nosferatu? I want to post a better comment, but I need to go back and reread again and that will probably have to wait until I get home. I guess I'll just end this with a quote for now and a promise to edit my reply later.
Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
The Cat: Oh, you can't help that. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
The Cat: You must be. Or you wouldn't have come here.
Alice: And how do you know that you're mad?
The Cat: To begin with, a dog's not mad. You grant that?
Alice: I suppose so,
The Cat: Well, then, you see, a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad.
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Hmm Raven and Summer, definatly an intresting pair, all though summer is the older it seems as though raven is the one who's truly in charge, as a pair they also act close and distant at the same time, very intresting
Summer regrets what she has done, I wonder if this involves Ai at all(or raven or both or perhaps even the same) intresting that they are also both 'hunter' seeking an abomination?
I kinda keep thinking of two 'blade' type characters at the moment....
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Hola! Here I is. :D Bet I surprised you guys!
waiwai: Lol I guess it's easy to think of Abe when the name is Summer? Not that it particularly matters...you'll see. XD I'll try to take better care of myself....*bends double from gastric* x_X I'll..try...
rndm: I beat you to your edit. :lol: Have no fear! New chapter is fear. Yes, we're all mad, and I love that quote! XD
oddball: Yes I rather like Raven and Summer. They're an interesting pair, suffice to say.
Ugh pain, but let's proceed to edit!
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Tablet VIII
She slumps down in the highest branches of a looming cedar, letting herself become part of the frosty scenery in the mountains of Lebanon.
It comforts her to be in high places, where she had spent the happiest times in her life, before everything went wrong. Here among the trees, snow and cold, she could heal; it was different from the dusty heat she was used to, but this suits her perfectly. The higher she was, the further away she was from causing harm to others.
Pain exhausts her already strained mind; it pulls at her battered reserves, demanding more from a consciousness split within itself. Already she finds it difficult to focus on what is before her; images from other places, other people, haunt her. Oft times she finds herself speaking aloud in a tongue she does not remember learning, or performing little gestures she doesn't recognize, yet finds oddly familiar at the same time. It chills her -- she is no longer sure what is her, or if it is all merely whispers of a dream, dreams of others.
Desperate, she clings to the rough bark, seeking the gloomy solidity it presents. Her prodigious strength, a result of her change, causes her to tear a wound in the old tree. It reminds her of how her hands wreak only destruction, and a fresh wave of despair washes over her -- along with the heady scent of balsam.
Surprised, she inhales, and finds her nasal passages clearing, bringing to her a rare calm that was hardly ever present in recent times. The sticky sap oozes like thick blood out of the living tree, and she leans against the solid trunk. She hears the heartbeat of the ancient tree, senses the roots reaching deep below the snow-covered ground. This tree has been alive for a long long time, as humans know it, had they been capable of scaling this high without aid.
There was an absolute serenity to it. The tree did not consider beginning or end, it merely is, and will be. Closing her eyes, she remembers her Lord's words in one of his many lessons.
"Not everyone is capable of understanding eternity without actually living it. Even though I have endless time before me, there are times when even I do not understand what it truly means. I can only look to the present, instead of fearing the future."
"But what of the future? Does it not concern you what it will bring?"
"Ah, that is true. But Ayesha, today's future is merely tomorrow's present. We are all but moments in this great river of time, engaged in a continual present..."
"I do not understand."
"Perhaps you will, in time."
Time, such an elusive concept. Here, amidst the timeless trees, Aisha (lovingly dubbed Ayesha by her Lord) could briefly glimpse eternity as it applied to beings like her.
A ripple in her second sight, and she was moving before she even stops to think. A blast of heat radiates both reality and unreality, a white hot flash that momentarily blinds her. But she has other senses at her disposal, and hisses in warning as she lands in a crouch on an opposing branch.
The cedar burns, and her heart howls at its injury. Another bolt splits the air towards her; she feels the air itself tearing in her second sight, and moves away without trouble. It strikes the heavy bark of the tree behind her, leaving a scorch mark.
They move like ghosts amidst the evergreens, the hunt following a familiar rhythm, like a dance. Aisha recognizes her attacker without seeing her; it wasn't the first time the upstart had come after her. Aside from showing a prodigious elemental ability, the rogue displayed a great deal of ingenuity and physical prowess as well.
Though the first time they clashed head-on, Aisha's unnatural strength had shattered the bronze sword and broken the wielder's wrist as well. Henceforth, their battles had tended to be conducted at range, usually when she least expected it.
She learns, however. The continual, intermittent pursuit forced her to hone her second sight, opening a literal whole new world to her senses. It was a dazzling, confusing whirl of color and impression. Her first tentative explorations of it gave her perpetual headaches, though she was growing accustomed to the kaleidoscopic nature of the Sight.
Aisha had known that she was being watched for a while, but showed no outward sign of noticing. Her dark shadow was not yet capable of killing her, though the girl had incredible potential. Aisha had no interest in eliminating night-walkers, however. She focused her wrath on the humans, the hunters. In truth, she even held some small sympathy for the children of the night, cursed never to walk in the day, and subject to similar torments as herself.
As if in reminder, a shudder of agony wracks her entire body, stopping her in her tracks. She hisses as a ball of fire grazes her shoulder, the burns healing in moments in a rippling move. Her fangs out, she pants heavily. Her last drink had been almost a week ago; she was definitely pushing her own limits.
The mindscape surrounding her holds a tinge of doubt, and the attacks pause. Without thought, Aisha suddenly accelerates, leaving a literal afterimage of herself where she was before she became completely untrackable by most eyes.
She collides with a surprised Raven, the taller girl knocked to the ground by the petite but insanely strong Aisha. Red eyes stare into dark ones, and Raven chokes as her captor tightens her grip. Yet it does not deter her from retaliating; one hand closes around the death grip, and lines of flame race up Aisha's arm in arcane patterns.
Raven rolls free, massaging her badly bruised neck as her quarry backs off. The flames dance as if alive, powered by the arcane symbols seared onto the skin. It burned, and would continue to burn, until there was nothing else left.
The pain is intense, doubly so for one who regenerates as well as Aisha does. The wounds could not close with the lasting flames, but her healing keeps it from eating her arm to bone and less. Tears spring from her eyes, even as she clutches the flaming limb.
It made for a peculiar scene at midnight. The forest was lit by the unnatural flames, and the two creatures, not so dissimilar from each other, faced off silently. Aisha does not scream, which impresses Raven; the soundless agony was fascinating in itself.
The silence ends as abruptly as it begins. Aisha raises her burning arm, sending shadows careening at wild angles. Raven takes a step back, suddenly cautious.
"Urgula. The Lion." A voice that was quite unlike Aisha's normal voice stated. It was her voice, no doubt, but it was as if someone else was speaking through her.
Raven is surprised once more. Only the most learned of scholars knew of the relation between the arcane lines in the sky and the forces running through the world. She had adapted the patterns to her runecraft, to amplify the elements. The Lion was the Sun, and would burn till the end of days.
"The Great One will devour." Again, that mechanical tone. There was a glint, almost a spark, in those red eyes. Raven's eyes narrowed. Surely not...
The dagger flashed gold in the flames, cutting swiftly and surely into the patterns drawn on the arm. Aisha did not even wince at the fresh wounds -- she was in enough pain that a little more matttered little.
Raven gaped. It was impossible, but there it was. Someone who knew the stars, knew about the magic of the land. Summer had had her own notions of magic, influenced by the culture of her native land. Her own grasp of the theory was fundamentally different, even radical for the time, and to have it countered just like that...
The lines of the Lion give way to the Water Bearer. Aisha collapses to her knees, still clutching the bronze dagger. Her arm sizzles audibly as it makes contact with the snow.
Logic suggests that Raven should flee, but she remains rooted, trying to comprehend the turn of events. Aisha looks up from her inflamed arm -- it would take a while to heal, after all it has been through. The swirling confusion surrounding Raven was easily readable, and when Aisha spoke, it was quiet, assuring.
"Ea, son of Enki, is my Master. It is but a small thing for the Water Bearer himself to quench the Lion's flame."
Raven understands in a moment, and she looks on the crouched figure with awe. Her attempts to kill the woman were no more than a test of her own ability...as well as her quarry's. There was no real grudge, at least not something to be held for a long time. Drawn by some unseen force, she kneels by Aisha, who draws away visibly, suspicious.
"You are...different." Raven tries to give voice to the nagging sense that had been dogging her even as she had pursued Aisha over the months.
"You are gifted." Aisha counters, already light on her feet and ready to flee if necessary.
"I know." There is no hint of pride or vanity in the statement, merely an acknowledgement of fact. Raven knew she was gifted, but she had worked hard for that 'gift'. No more, no less. This certainty raises her a few notches in Aisha's estimation, though she said nothing.
Aisha hisses again, her fangs extending in her distress. Her body feels cold, and her vision grows spotty. Her hands punch through the frozen ground, clenching in fury as she fought for control of her body.
A gentle touch almost makes her snap, but the firm grasp on her shoulder held no ill intent that she could read. Worry pulses from the dark blip on her Sight, but she remains unmoved...until she smells blood on the wind.
A bleeding wrist is before her, she latches on like a starved beast. The rush of flavor and memory is instantaneous; she sees the frozen tundra that raised the Raven before she was plucked and transported to the hot lands.
She does not take much; just that little taste has given her more than she can imagine. Her eyes fade back to a deep brown, soft and wondering. Raven grimaces, moving to withdraw her hand, but Aisha stops her.
"Let me." Her lips were incomparably soft on the torn skin, and Raven shudders. The skin mends with scarcely any effort, and both withdraw, quietened by the strange intimacy they just shared.
Aisha stands. She is still in pain, and still weak. She needed to feed. She turns away, and Raven suddenly speaks up.
"I'm still going to kill you, you know."
Aisha smiles.
"Good."
No more words were exchanged, and Raven watches her quarry disappear down the mountain, contemplative.
Off in the distance, Summer watches, her face twisting into an unflattering mask. Raven was hers, not someone else's. She would not share her fledgling with anyone, much less someone like that.
There are consequences for our actions. Some are just delayed.
In the end, we are the authors of our own fate.
==================================================================
Notes:
1) Aisha/Ayesha - Aisha means "alive and well", and Ayesha means "small one". Pronunciation is quite close, and yes, this is Ai's original name as a human.
2) Urgula - The Babylonian name for the Leo constellation, hence "the Lion".
3) "The Great One", Water Bearer - The original Babylonian word is gula, which translates to "great one". Both refer to Aquarius, the Water Bearer.
4) Ea - Traditionally connected in Sumerian star readings to Aquarius. Enki literally translates to "lord of the earth", and has many references to water also.
Back to a more linear storytelling style that should be more familiar. And easier to read, I hope. XD
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oh snap ai vs raven fight~ !! but thats a cute nickname for ai too have XD i wonder if she haited it at 1st XD
and now im like kinda lost cus if ai's a vampier and ravens a vampier too like why would they be fighting against eachotehr? unless ai's some creppy hybrid thing? XD i mean she's the "abomination" what the hell makes her so bad?? :panic:
and she's a water magic lady too??? :panic: :panic: :panic:
i wants more but i shal wait*sits and waits for the next one* :)
1 chappy after another my goodness ur making me happy X3 XD and aw summers not abe? oh well XD and plz try^^; XD
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Ai is the abomination? I don't know why I'm so surprised. So Raven hunts her and Ai hunts hunters? Summer is the question, then. Where did she pop up from? I sense an Ai/Summer showdown sometime in the future. Or would that be somewhere in the distant present?
Still need to do some major reading, lol.
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Lol I would like to know your logic for the Raven = Ai conclusion.
Well my mind functions in a very simple way, maybe that’s why. :nervous
Now, my mind's starting to spin :grin:
Hmmm... :)
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So Ai may well be the abomination, well at least in the eyes of summer and Raven anyway and they are hunting her while she is hunting the 'hunters' I wonder if it is becasue Ai is not sticking to some sort of code which her kind live by? (to agrerssive, killing too many?)
Why do I feel as though Summer may be more important than I first thought, she may be more key to this story than I first anticipated.
I wonder if the 'hunters' and Raven and Summer might at some point form an uneasy alliance?.....
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*prances in* Essy-neechan~ :mon dance: :mon roll: :mon hi:
My 1st post went to rokun and my 100th post goes to you. I found it fitting to leave my 100th post on jphip to be my first comment for one of your fics.
I used today as my day to go into reading mode and catch up with Gegenschein. :mon angel: A blissful day full of questions, answers, comedy, gut-wrenching gore, more questions, and much more that my brain can't completely spout out due to my lack of words at the moment.
At this point, I am happily confused :mon thumb: . I'll probably come back tomorrow or sometime soon when my brain is fully(or at least more than half) functional and either edit this post or comment again if you've updated. I have some ideas but I think it'd just end up being incoherent brain barf if I actually tried to explain my guesses.
:mon huh2: For some reason, I felt your writing change starting from Tablet VI. :mon dunno: Then again, it could just be that the side effects of going into reading mode kicking in.
In any case.... I actually did prance into this thread after catching up. :mon innocent: No lurking.
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*wobble wobble* I just caught up too...but I think I lost my brain along the way XD
Gore though, just for Sushi.
Ugh the gore! the gore! :mon barf:
Tablet VIII
The sticky sap oozes like thick blood out of the living tree
Must you ruin maple syrup for me as well, Ms Gore?! :mon heh:
*tries to move on* :cool2: Let's see....
Tablet IV
Eeew the blood....*ahem* *tries to move on again* oh tsk tsk....poor thing waited too long :sweat: Guess the lesson of the day is Carpe Diem...get your revenge while you can!
Tablet V
Ooo mystery healer dude, he seems likable and creepy at the same time XD
Summer, that's right. Her name means Summer.
Eeeeek don't tell me it's Koharu! Wait...I'm thinking of the wrong season....indian summer...
good thing that thought only lasted a brief moment XD Nacchi~ :wub:
Nacchi being all jealous is weird :lol:
So let's see if I have any of this right. So Raven is a kind of hunter. Her clan got killed off by a different gang of people. The same gang that killed off Ai chan's lover. Raven's the educated one while Ai chan's more savage? Ai chan gets revenge. Raven gets gypped. Abe gets jealous and Raven and Ai chan fight?
LOL you're gonna tell me to re-read everything again aren't you? XD
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Gah, forget about editing. I'll just use a new post to comment. My brain only retained like 50% of the story for Gegenschein: The First so I just decided to reread it since it's fairly short compared to Gegenschein.
Tablet I
Well, now I believe that the narrator of the prologue and her "partner" have that situation where one can't live without the other. Something like the idea that light can't exist without darkness. Vampires, hunters, werewolves; they all hunt and are hunted. What the hell even led me to this? :P
Tablet II
Of course, they never get more than a moment's happiness. How many times does this guy save Ai? Let's see, I'd say he gave her life three times but I don't think making her undead counts.
Fairly irrelevant but can Ai swim? I really don't remember. :lol:
Tablet III
You made me go back and check names. Barak, Baram, Baran. I'm so going to get lost in names. :panic:
Oh well, my guess about why you chose to write this chapter from this POV is that it's kind of like a set up for Tablet II. Alright, so I phrased that badly but you'll have to forgive me since my brain still isn't functioning at 100% right now. In any case, I'd say Barak and his group are the ones that killed Ai's sire.
Tablet IV
The only flicker of anything resembling hate was at the moment of killing. The instant she ended the life of anything, fiend or human, it was there where her eyes became fiery and alive, a seething rage that threatened to devour all that stood before her held barely in check.
And then the subject dies, and she is calm once more. Impassive, like a statue.
Just had to quote that because Raven kind of scares me. I love her. :heart:
... What the... irony of feathers, child of the Night, dancing on night of the new moon.... something in my head is screaming "Werewolf!!!" *shrugs* She's most likely a vampire but it still screams werewolf more than vampire to me. XD
First priority: hunt down the bitch that killed me. Yeah, would have died. Hell, should have died. Damn friend should have been less softhearted. Hell, I should have just killed the idiot the first time. Now I'm alive and...what? I'm hungry! Shut the hell up! They should all die, and I should have killed them myself. And damn, that tastes awful. Yeah, priority, kill the bitch that got to them before I could. Damn her.
Damn, I love her. XD Yeah, I really don't know why but I do.
Alright, what Tablet was I on....
Tablet V
I assume this is the story of Ai's sire. Could his father be one of the Sources?
What did he promise her? He promised to not turn her into a vampire!
Ai technically can die if she really wants to, right? But even she doesn't know what awaits her after death. Dealing with the unknown can be scarier than suffering almost an eternity?
Tablet VI
Oh, so that's probably where I got the idea about being partners from. Yeah, I don't know who Raven would be.
"The hunters at Zagros...the God-slayers...where are they?"
So I was right about why you used that specific POV for Tablet III? At least revenge gives her a purpose in life (unlife, not life, whatever)?
You know, I'm really surprised I haven't lost any food from reading the gore in your story. *twitch twitch* Too bad I still end up tensing at the spots that I read about being ripped out and kicked and everything. *shudders* I still remember the details about the hunter torturing Reina at the scrapyard.
Tablet VII
Alright, so my head finally stopped screaming werewolf. :lol: She was human all the way to this point though, right? Well, then my next guess is that Raven is Reina's master. The Wild One does sound like it might be Ai but at the same time it doesn't.
Tablet VIII
So Ai really is the Wild One then?
Controlling fire? :w00t: Didn't think she could do that but then again she was supposed to excel in her magical abilities.
Aw crap, Summer is going to do something. She's so going to get killed by Ai at one point or another.
Nope, my brain does not want to try to figure out who Summer and Raven are right now. Maybe I'll have some kind of epiphany at one point or maybe I'll just blurt out random guesses after the next chapter. :D
Holy crap, this would've been a freaking long post if I had actually I had actually let my brain barf out everything that was running through my mind... Oh well, maybe it'll still make you happy. :D
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Oh hey, here I is. XD
Comment replies!
waiwai: Creepy hybrid thing Ai isn't really...but creepy is pretty close. XD As for what makes her so bad....I really do need to explain, don't I? ^^; I wouldn't call her a water magic lady, but runes can be altered by anyone, though it takes someone with power to activate it in the first place. Lol it's ok, sometimes I wonder wtf I'm doing too. :P
rndm: More about Summer in the upcoming chapter. XD I hope I'm keeping you on your toes lol.
kRisZ: I like making minds spin. Teehee. XD
oddball: I think Ai is an abomination because of what she is, and now what she does. XD I really should explain huh... And you are right, she is more key to the story than even I anticipated. orz. Isn't it odd how characters sometimes become more alive on their own? o_o;
Tuna: :heart: Such a cute imouto. XD You are right, my writing did start to change from Tablet VI because it shifted to a more linear timeline instead of skipping around showing snippets. XD And I'm glad you're not lurking either! You're good at catching the links between the Tablets too! Good girl. :D It's too hard to reply to everything you speculated, but I can say one thing: you're good! :D Haha. :P Keep on commenting!
Sushi: You're finally here! XD The gore isn't even that bad. :P You're just fragile. :lol: And actually that's a surprisingly succinct summary of current events based on the information you have. XD Good job! Lol. I'll be nice for once and say that you did good. :P
Time to edit and post!
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Tablet IX
She hides in the shadows, prowling close.
Her quarry sits on a ledge, legs dangling over a sheer precipice. The mild evening breeze runs invisible fingers through her hair, sending it streaming over one shoulder.
Closer. Time slowed to a crawl as she moves through the shadows, the invisible seam between light and darkness that mortal eyes could not penetrate. It hides her from view, though it does nothing to erase the sense of her presence...at least nothing beyond what she could manage herself.
Close. Within striking distance, to take the head off that slender neck pale in the twilight. She pauses, contemplating the best moment to strike...
Then she hears the low hum of more than one voice, ghosting through the quiet night. It came from the lone figure she stalked, a sorrowful dirge of profound loss. It makes her pause, undecided all of a sudden. Surely a monster would not be capable of such music?
The figure shifts, looking up at the barely visible rim of the moon half hidden by clouds. Tears are visible on that face, with lips parted in silent agony.
The hand half raised to strike is lowered, confusion evident now. What was this? Surely not so mad after all, or more likely, there was a method to the madness, a purpose behind it. Not completely irrational, possibly even salvageable?
"Why will you not kill me?" The voice was sorrowful, and the huntress jolts, startled. Her prey was looking right at her, and not merely in her direction. How had the fiend managed to break her camouflage?
"You wanted to kill me." Now that the disguise was broken, she steps out of the shadows. Her step was wary, ready to fight or flee at a moment's notice. Regardless of what this creature might seem to be, there was no question that it could be very dangerous.
"I do. You are dangerous." Too dangerous to exist in this world. Despite not being of much auspicious origins herself, the huntress knows that the being before her could be a plague on the world.
"That is true. My very existence is forbidden." A rueful smile.
"Then, you are aware of what you are?" That was disturbing. Most others did not know what they were, much less who they were before the change, but this one seemed to retain a great degree of self awareness. That was very rare indeed.
"Bits and pieces. I know what you are, Night Walker, born of the blood of my kind." Those large eyes grew unfocused, distant. "I see things, people...I don't remember them, but I know things..."
"You are mad." The huntress is afraid, but does not show it. There had been stories of the abominations who had taken on the blood memories of the true immortals, and this one was showing all the signs of it.
A light chuckle, and the lithe figure rises sinuously to her feet, balancing precariously on the edge with her arms outstretched. She walks a steady line on the very edge, not even flinching when pebbles crumble from under her feet.
"Oh, I must be. I have to be. Mad! Such a word!" She twirls on the spot, unheeding of the fact that she could plummet to her death with the slightest miscalculation.
"I have been mad." Her voice was low, steady all of a sudden as she came to an abrupt halt. As if imparting a great secret, she continues.
"I went mad when they killed my beloved. I was mad when they killed my unborn child. I must still be mad, because they killed me too, but here I still am."
She bows her head.
"And now I kill them."
The huntress represses a shudder. There was a ring of absolute truth in those words, the stark reality of pain relived over and over in those fathomless eyes. Despair fought with hatred in that husky timbre, even though the very essence of it rang hollow.
This woman was badly broken in more than one way. It would have been a mercy to kill her, to end her misery. But there was something...
"You want me to kill you. Why?"
She is rewarded with a strange look, almost approaching amusement.
"Do I not deserve death? I have killed...many. I only know how to destroy. My existence threatens the world with war, should I be mad enough to spread my disease."
She spreads her hands. "You were created to deal with my kind. This I know, if little else."
"You want to die." The huntress says, suddenly certain. The strange smile on her quarry's face does not fade.
"I have nothing left to live for. Those responsible for my Master's death are dead by my hand. There is no longer any meaning for my existence. I should have died when He did."
The huntress is silent for a moment.
"I cannot kill you."
There is true rage on that eternally young face, warping otherwise beautiful features into a hideous mask. In a blink she holds the huntress -- now the hunted -- by the neck, shaking her like a rag doll.
"Must you let me suffer? Why did you not kill me when you wanted to? Why!"
She chokes in that suffocating grip; it is perhaps fortunate she does not need air anymore.
"Because..." She gasps. "Because your hunt is not yet over."
The grip loosens fractionally. She takes the opportunity to continue.
"I have seen things. The reasons for which the Immortals are hunted by those they protected...the reason your Master was killed...are you not interested why?"
Confusion. The hand holding her up lowers.
"I...do not understand. How would you know...and why would you care?"
Red eyes flashed in the dark.
"You're not the only one with a vendetta."
~*~*~
On retrospect, perhaps ridding the world of that abomination that night might have been a better choice in the long run.
Summer wondered what whim had made her pause, but it had been too good an opportunity to pass up. On her own, she was forced to run and hide from the presence of hunters, with little thought given to the future.
Meeting her dear Raven had been a revelation. Here was another one of power, disaffected by the reins holding her. Raven could very well have killed her on their first meeting, but she had not. Perhaps it amused the girl to disobey orders, and Summer had never been more grateful for that flight of fancy.
Now she had her fierce hunter by her side, and that made any possible pursuit by the rank and file of those damnable humans laughable in terms of danger posed to their combined forces. Summer recognized that Raven was one of the most gifted of her generation, and the second awakening she had bestowed on her had merely opened her mind to a different world.
Raven could kill the abomination in a straight fight. That was something Summer herself was incapable of. She could only take advantage of a swift, decisive attack from cover, but would be at a vast disadvantage if the damage she made with that first strike was not lethal or incapacitating. Her talent lay in charm and misdirection, not in an all out fight.
Her Raven would be a failsafe, she knew. The abomination could not be trusted. Even now that thing was still only in its infancy, barely aware of the true extent of its powers. It was a gamble she made, counting on the wild card to disrupt things sufficiently so that her target would become visible. Though it would all fall apart if Raven herself fell prey to the influence of the abomination.
Every one of them was different, but there were common characteristics uniting them. Their cursed blood, and their thirst. Other talents manifested according to the individual, and already this one was showing signs of overpowering domination. If allowed to awaken to its true abilities, it would be as dangerous as the ones who had mastered themselves in the first war, maybe even more.
It was almost too untenable a risk to take, but take it she must. Summer clenched her fists. That man had ruined everything, destroyed her gods -- though she hated them for turning her into what she is now, she knew that it was for a good cause. Her fellows had scattered because of the traitor, and she knew that there could not be many of them left.
After all, they had been plucked from a staid existence from along the banks of the Nile, enlisted unwittingly into a struggle greater than themselves. They were not warriors, merely shaped into the mould of one. If Summer had been less resourceful herself, she would have perished early on. They were nothing if not meant to be disposable.
Well, she would show them. She would not disappear without a trace, as both her creator and her enemies wanted. Vengeance was but a petty thing to live for, but it could be a powerful motivator.
She would see justice done, one way or another. And when everything ended...
She would be happy to let it end then, if there ever was one.
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I really like skipping around in time. XD
Postponing important plans to next chapter. Woohoo!
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*blinks* A non-gorey, relatively straightforward chapter?! This must be a trap! :mon wtf:
There had been stories of the abominations who had taken on the blood memories of the true immortals, and this one was showing all the signs of it.
Oooo....since Aisha's lover was super old...this must be like getting wise through osmosis...I like that thought! XD
I was mad when they killed my unborn child.
Kyaaaaaaa! Not the child!! :mon scare: I wonder how they even achieved that...If Ai got turned while pregnant wouldn't her child become immortal too? If they killed her child before hand...then when did her lover get a chance to turn her? :mon dunno:
Oh but then does that mean Raven becomes her pyro child?...since she does have magical powers and all? Hmm...I wonder if that would work...they both seem so young...well Raven seems the same age or older (cause she acts less savage) while Ai chan seems more like a baby vamp right now XD Well I guess the more straightforward scenario would be that Ai chan turns someone and takes them in later on in the story....but you know me...I've always been curious about the little pyro XD
Since I don't remember any women hunting Ai chan in Gegenschein proper...I wonder if Raven and Ai become friends....seems like they are on their way to understanding each other starting with this chapter. Either that or I would imagine someone dies..either Raven or Summer....and that's why they aren't mentioned in the present XD
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*twitch* Still Tuna.... :mon runcry: Oh well.
A more linear timeline. Hmmmm, was that it? :mon huh2: I'd still just say that
:monk gboy: I did good? :mon squee: That's surprising since at least half of the comment was just random brain barf.
I have a feeling that Raven is still alive during the main Gegenschein but Summer is dead.Hhhhhmmm, would Summer be one of the Sources too? :huhuh Wait, Reina was a 4th generation Noble.... 3, 2, 1.... Assuming that Raven is Reina's sire, Summer is not a Source but she's in the same generation as Ai? Now I question who Ai's fledgling is. Will her fledgling even make an appearance or will she only appear in the main Gegenschein?
Ggaaahhh, my eyes just gave me signs that I should sleep so I'll actually continue commenting tomorrow.
"Then, you are aware of what you are?" That was disturbing. Most others did not know what they were, much less who they were before the change, but this one seemed to retain a great degree of self awareness. That was very rare indeed.
Will we get an example of one of these "monsters" that aren't aware of what they are?
"Bits and pieces. I know what you are, Night Walker, born of the blood of my kind." Those large eyes grew unfocused, distant. "I see things, people...I don't remember them, but I know things..."
Night Walker and Day Walker together? It's like each vampire lineage has its own little specialities. :P So what does Ai remember then and what does she see?
"Oh, I must be. I have to be. Mad! Such a word!" She twirls on the spot, unheeding of the fact that she could plummet to her death with the slightest miscalculation.
"I have been mad." Her voice was low, steady all of a sudden as she came to an abrupt halt. As if imparting a great secret, she continues.
:cry: Damn, I love her.
"I have nothing left to live for. Those responsible for my Master's death are dead by my hand. There is no longer any meaning for my existence. I should have died when He did."
Wait... When did she get revenge? Did I forget something again?
She chokes in that suffocating grip; it is perhaps fortunate she does not need air anymore.
"Because..." She gasps. "Because your hunt is not yet over."
Random question: Why gasp when you don't have to breathe? Human habit?
"I have seen things. The reasons for which the Immortals are hunted by those they protected...the reason your Master was killed...are you not interested why?"
Lately, my brain seems to be slacking off at making connections. :P Certain parts of the story are popping into my head again. If I remember correctly, Raven was part of the tribe/group/whatever that Baram was in. So you did already write about Ai getting revenge? She killed off the village that took her in after her clan was killed.
Now she had her fierce hunter by her side, and that made any possible pursuit by the rank and file of those damnable humans laughable in terms of danger posed to their combined forces. Summer recognized that Raven was one of the most gifted of her generation, and the second awakening she had bestowed on her had merely opened her mind to a different world.
Darn, I was kinda hoping that Ai was Raven's sire. Wait, was Raven already turned before Ai killed off that group? If yes, then when did Summer show up?... *tries to reach into memory pool*.... Nope. Not working.
It was almost too untenable a risk to take, but take it she must. Summer clenched her fists. That man had ruined everything, destroyed her gods -- though she hated them for turning her into what she is now, she knew that it was for a good cause. Her fellows had scattered because of the traitor, and she knew that there could not be many of them left.
Hhhhmmm, Summer wants revenge for something? I almost want to say that Summer is the little girl from the mine that got marked but then you mentioned a staid existence and the Nile. Thinking... Thinking... Gah, I can't remember if you've written anything that might be the answer to my question.
Mmmmmm, I like being confused. :mon inluv: This story is like solving a jigsaw puzzle. It better not be one of those puzzles that piss me off because I find out a piece is missing in the end. Questions, questions, so many questions. :mon rush:
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Hmm definatly an intresting insight into a bit of tyhe background between Raven and Summer.
I kinda noticing a similarity here between Raven and the abomonation they are chasing, Raven seems to have her fellings much more under control now, I suspect mainly thanks to Summer? However it seems as though summer fears what Raven may become if she ever realizes her ture power, it seems as though Summer has a mixture of respect, freindship and fear for Raven!
Also Kind of got the feeling that you were hinting that Summer was also like Raven once herself, a turned abomination, brought back to fight abominations themeslves.....
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So Summer's hunting for the traitor who started the whole thing? :huhuh What was the thing that was started? :?
What I do know for certain is that she's intrigued Ai enough to join her and Raven!! :D And I'm so looking forward to some more Ai Raven interaction. I'm beginning to get the feeling that Raven is related to Reina in some way. Again, though, Summer is the question. Better behind the scenes and in the shadows, pulling strings to get her way. Mayhaps things will not end well for her.
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lol so creppy's still there...ok XD and i will be glad to find out why she is so bad ^^; eh, mistery's good when it comes to u ^^
ok so let me get this straight...ai talked to summer and now she's with her and raven?? *gasps* oh my god! XD i cant wait to see what's gonna happen next X3 and i feel so bad for her whenever she talkes about the baby D:*goes to cry in a corner*
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So, I decided to regrow a brain and the first thing I was drawn to was this thread... :lol:
YAY for major catch up!
:onioncheer:
Are you having some kind of writer's block again, Essy? :P
You haven't updated in a while, but no matter. You just take your time and write when it suits you... forced writing can be messy and ineffective, and we certainly don't want to be any more confused as it is...
At least I don't want to be, I can see some of the other readers already beginning to piece things together... XD
Am I that slow? Unobservant?
I mean, I did do the dreaded Literature as a subject in Yr 12 and passed with flying colours after all, I shouldn't be having such trouble with a mere fanfic :sweatdrop:
I want to be getting things like that *clicks fingers*, you know? But you're not allowing me that satisfaction with all your time travelling and skipping about! *shakes fists*
Lol, it's okay, Essy. It's actually a good kind of frustrating. Hopefully by the end of this, I'll be enlightened in some way and not just left with a shamble of passing thoughts and events. ^___^
And by the way, as I was reading through the last few chapters, I was wondering if you had all this stuff planned ages ago, while you were writing the main Gegenschein? Or had you only begun to develop a context afterwards? Just curious! :)
Onwards!
Tablet V
Backstory to Ai's master?
So... he was just born like that? Inhuman? A vampire? Are we even talking vampires here? :lol:
'Coz this Almighty dude who turned Ai, I'm not even sure what exactly he was now. So he was never turned and was simply born a powerful, godly vampire? Again, are we even talking vampires?
LOL....
Wow, hungry and primitive Ai-chan (now this has got to be Ai-chan, right?) described very well. The contrast from these raw images to the Seirei we now know is jaw dropping. Gives you such a staggering sense of how much time has passed, how much our Lady Vamp has been through. :shocked
Those ending thoughts... when your existence brings only hatred and destruction... what to live for?
Ai-chan... how very lonely. :cry:
Tablet VI
Great chapter! Contained awesome description. Please up the gore level (do any of you other guys mind? :P), that would really make the readings even more delicious to savour :grin:
It was also then that she realized she had found something to do for the rest of her life, long as it would probably be, whether she liked it or not.
Raven finds her purpose in Ai? Is it like some kind of quiet war raging between these two? Fuelled by some competitive streak? At least, for Raven it seems like that could be the case.
[THE NEXT SCENE WHEN AI-CHAN LETS LOOSE]
I like, I like! Imagining a little beauty like Ai-chan completely wreaking havoc on a bunch of fully armed men... go go, girl! Even if it was the wrong group she got...
And neat idea, with the ability to gain memories and impressions from tasting the blood... :w00t:
I'm... I'm starting to see things? Lol... okay, so here's another attempt to make some connections:
Ai-chan killed Raven's group (with the Barak dude) because that's the group that she's been looking for all this time. They're the ones who killed her master? But why? Did they seek to destroy Him, or Ai? Or the child in Ai? Was she an abomination even before being turned? :?
As for who slaughtered Raven's tribe, that is still up in the air for questioning, right? The murderers, somehow connected to Ai-chan as well?
Tablet VII
Summer...
A new appearance xD
Summer and Raven are an interesting duo to read. Raven the supposed 'fledgeling', yet Summer seems to be quite wary of her. It's kind of cute, what's going on here. :love:
Well, Raven really does remind me of Reina, especially while reading this chapter. It's in her petulance, her edge, her willingness 'to spit destiny in the face and then stomp all over it' as you so nicely put it.
Raven might be Reina's master?
That thing was dangerous. The ones she had seen before were all half-mad, horribly deformed in mind and body. It had been a mercy to end their lives for them, brought back incompletely as they were. As it were, they had been a plague on mankind.
Ai-chan, the Wild One as it seems, brings some kind of plague with her? How so?
What makes her such an abomination? But why is she such a pretty little thing at the same time? :lol:
Summer wondered just how mad she really was, even as she deliberately led Raven astray
How so? ...
...
She went expecting a monster. She left behind her a woman in mourning.
Hah?
Because of all the skipping around in time, I'm kind of confused by this now... I have thoughts, but I'll keep them to myself for now. I might sound like an idiot if I blabber any more than I should... :nervous
Tablet VIII
Another chapter I really enjoyed! :wub:
Aisha... awwwww. Cute name... hehee. The beginning description of her connection to the landscape around her was :heart:
Ai // Raven confrontation! :shocked:
I really do love it when you give us action; your details are great. ^__^
"You are...different."
They finally realise Ai-chan is more than some deformed abomination? And have to pay her more respect henceforth?
Is Ai-chan really even one? Or is everybody just mistaken? A have a feeling she might just be misunderstood or something.. :nervous
Off in the distance, Summer watches, her face twisting into an unflattering mask. Raven was hers, not someone else's. She would not share her fledgling with anyone, much less someone like that.
Uh oh. XD
Raven is probably going to get attached to Ai, and Summer's going to suffer jealousy-induced fits until she snaps and attempts to finish off Ai, and thus meets her demise... lol...
Tablet IX
...
Okay, so what is Ai again? xD
Lol, so many hints and suggestions, but nothing explicitly put out in the open yet. Her existence is forbidden... she is an abomination, a plague to the world.
Why again?
How has Ai gained herself such an infamous/despicable rep?
"You're not the only one with a vendetta."
Yay for this imminent combination of forces.
Summer doesn't really appreciate Ai's presence does she? Not when Raven is that interested in her. Probably sees Ai as useful for the time being (for her revenge?), or is hoping for Raven to turn on her one day when Ai least expects it or something.
There is going to be some kind of betrayal though, right? You mentioned that somewhere in one of the previous chapters, I have no idea...
There's still a lot to piece together, but I'm kind of getting a clearer picture. I hope. xD
Thanks for the brain stimulating reads, I needed that. :thumbsup
... and just wanted to say, all these chapters were written so beautifully :heart:
You really have a way with words, Essy. Great stuff. :on GJ:
You promise by the end of this, you will provide us with an author's commentary for each chapter? :lol:
LOL. I think that would be very insightful. At the very least, it would give us a little peek into how your brain works. XD
THANK YOU FOR THE UPDATES AND LOOKING FORWARD TO THE NEXT ONE!~ :heart:
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Ai had an unborn baby?! :shocked which reminds me... there's something that's been bothering me for months... was there an Ai Jr. in the new book or was it just my imagination? I still can remember I said to myself 'Oh she has a child' when I read one of the chapters but I could be wrong :grin: