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| (http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ma3tfuoPJI1rsbd76o1_500.png) | (http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ma3tfuoPJI1rsbd76o2_500.gif) |
Did you miss us? We are back! New contest, more, new (and bigger!) prizes and some more changes! What are you waiting for?
THIS CONTEST IS NOW OVER!
Results Here! (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1113434#msg1113434)
✣ Rules (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/31274820961/contest48-rules-fall-2012) ✣ Prizes (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/31275007053/contest48-prizes-fall-2012) ✣ Voters (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/31274921706/contest48-on-voting-fall-2012) ✣ How to Submit (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/20054322694/contest48-how-to-submit) ✣ Past Contest (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=32404.0) ✣
This is a list of the changes that have been made since the last Contest48.
Please only use this as your guideline if you have already participated/read the structure for the previous contest. If not, please read the full version in the links up here! ⇧
✎ Additions to the rules:
- There is a minimum-length of 1,250 words
- Banned Pairings: Acchan/Takamina (Atsumina), Kojiharu/Yuko (Kojiyuu), Mayuyu/Yukirin (Mayuki), Gekikara/Black (GekiBlack), Sae/Yukirin (Saeyuki), Jurina/Rena (WMatsui), and Rena/Airin (Renairin)
- Since we are now including SKE48 prizes, we are hoping to see more sister-group involved entries
- Every author who submits an entry must also submit a vote during the designated voting period
- The submission period is from September 10 to October 1
✎ Additions for the voters (optional, only if you would like to win a prize):
- Submit not only your top picks, but also some of the reasons as to why you picked such entries
- The voters who submit the most detailed, most encouraging, or most amazing reasons for their votes could win prizes of their own
- We will also be keeping track and noticing who is complimenting stories throughout the entire contest.
- The voting period is from October 4 to October 15
✎ Changes in the prizes:
- 1º PLACE - A PACK OF TRUMP CARDS (http://i.imgur.com/SJHkr.jpg) *, A PACK WITH 6 (AKB/SKE) TRADING CARDS, AND YOUR CHOICE OF 6 PICTURES FROM THESE (http://s1244.photobucket.com/albums/gg564/contest48/?start=all) **
- 2º PLACE - A PACK WITH 4 (AKB/SKE) TRADING CARDS AND YOUR CHOICE OF 3 PICTURES FROM THESE (http://s1244.photobucket.com/albums/gg564/contest48/?start=all)
- SPECIAL PRIZE - 2 (AKB/SKE) TRADING CARDS AND YOUR CHOICE OF 1 PICTURE FROM THESE (http://s1244.photobucket.com/albums/gg564/contest48/?start=all) OR YOUR CHOICE OF 2 PICTURE FROM THESE (http://s1244.photobucket.com/albums/gg564/contest48/?start=all)
- VOTER’S PRIZE - 2 (AKB/SKE) TRADING CARDS OR YOUR CHOICE OF 1 PICTURE FROM THESE (http://s1244.photobucket.com/albums/gg564/contest48/?start=all)
- The winners will be announced the week of October 21
Last contest, we received an offer from someone who wanted to donate prizes. While we decided we didn’t want to inconvenience anyone at the time (we were still unsure if the contest would work out), if anyone is interested in donating x-48 related items for this contest, then we would be grateful and would gladly accept. Throw us a message in our askbox (http://contest48.tumblr.com/ask), send us a pm here in the forum or contact us via e-mail if you are interesed!
* We found the image for the Trump Playing Cards here at this listing (http://www.ebay.com/itm/AKB48-Official-Trump-Playing-Cards-Christmas-Limited-New-from-JAPAN-/221079324532?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item33795ac774). We did not want to open and risk damaging the pack that we have for the winner
** We will be adding more pics to this album, stay tuned!
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Fanfic List
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- Entry #1 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1093807#msg1093807) -
| Title: Atsui |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Yokoyama Yui, Matsui Rena, Kitahara Rie; Yui/Rena |
| Word Count: 3195 |
- Entry #2 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1094171#msg1094171) -
| Title: The Quick Shot |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Matsui Jurina, Itano Tomomi, Yagami Kumi, Nito Moeno; Jurina/Tomomi |
| Word Count: 2522 |
- Entry #3 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1094280#msg1094280) -
| Title: Playing with Fire |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Shinoda Mariko, Kojima Haruna, Matsui Jurina, Nakanishi Yuuka; MariHaru |
| Word Count: 2627 |
- Entry #4 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1094656#msg1094656) -
| Title: Bath: An AKB0048 Fic |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Yuihan the 6th, Kitarie the 8th; YuiRie |
| Word Count:2638 |
- Entry #5 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1094872#msg1094872) -
| Title: It Started With a Message |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Yagami Kumi and Kimoto Kanon; Kuuminon |
| Word Count:2462 |
- Entry #6 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1094967#msg1094967) -
| Title:A Maiden's First Love |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Ohori Megumi, Kasai Tomomi; Tomomi/Megumi |
| Word Count: 1502 |
- Entry #7 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1095385#msg1095385) -
| Title: Messed Up |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Matsui Jurina, Takayanagi Akane; ChuriJuri |
| Word Count: 1886 |
- Entry #8 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1095391#msg1095391) -
| Title: Truth |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Sasaki Yukari |
| Word Count: 2466 |
- Entry #9 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1095693#msg1095693) -
| Title: Kasuka na Kaori |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takayagi Akane, Matsui Jurina; ChuriJuri. |
| Word Count: 1264 |
- Entry #10 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1095737#msg1095737) -
| Title: My Little Angel |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Sashihara Rino, Murashige Anna |
| Word Count: 1896 |
- Entry #11 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1096018#msg1096018) -
| Title:Yesterday’s Road To Eternity |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Itano Tomomi, Kasai Tomomi; TomoTomo |
| Word Count: 10981 |
- Entry #12 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1096151#msg1096151) -
| Title: Deal |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Itano Tomomi, Matsui Jurina; Tomomi/Jurina |
| Word Count: 2,128 |
- Entry #13 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1096212#msg1096212) -
| Title:Yuki no Koi |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takayanagi Akane, Matsui Jurina, Matsui Rena; ChuriJuri |
| Word Count: 2,128 |
- Entry #14 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1096574#msg1096574) -
| Title:Unlimited Love |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Shinoda Mariko, Matsui Jurina; Mariko/Jurina |
| Word Count: 4,003 |
- Entry #15 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1096692#msg1096692) -
| Title: Tomo & Taka & the Caterpillar Incident |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s):Takahashi Minami, Itano Tomomi; TakaTomo |
| Word Count: 2,432 |
- Entry #16 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1097013#msg1097013) -
| Title: Welcome Home |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Gekikara, Yuko, Shibuya, Dance, Black, Torigoya, Sado |
| Word Count: 3,195 |
- Entry #17 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1097125#msg1097125) -
| Title: Hope |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s):Bunker, Sudachi, Jovijovich, Annin, Nobunaga; NobuAnnin |
| Word Count: 1,300 |
- Entry #18 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1097430#msg1097430) -
| Title: Boys Don't Cry |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Abe Maria (Tetsuo), Matsui Jurina (Nobunaga) |
| Word Count: 3,115 |
- Entry #19 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1097528#msg1097528) -
| Title: Black Sweet Apple |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Matsui Rena, Shinoda Mariko, Matsui Jurina, Watanabe Mayu; Rena/Mariko, Jurina/Mayu |
| Word Count: 2,696 |
- Entry #20 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1097800#msg1097800) -
| Title: Majisuka Kiss |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s):Oshima Yuko, Matsui Rena, Matsui Jurina; Yuko/Rena |
| Word Count: 1281 |
- Entry #21 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1097917#msg1097917) -
| Title: Tripping and Falling Back |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Oshima Yuko, Takahashi Minami, Maeda Atsuko; Yuko/Minami |
| Word Count: 2148 |
- Entry #22 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1098160#msg1098160) -
| Title: What lies beneath the surface |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Kimoto Kanon, Matsui Jurina |
| Word Count: 2840 |
- Entry #23 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1098259#msg1098259) -
| Title: Red String |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Nakatsuka Tomomi,Yokoyama Yui, Nonaka Misato; Tomomi/Yui |
| Word Count: 4390 |
- Entry #24 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1098304#msg1098304) -
| Title:we have not touched the stars |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Maeda Atsuko, Oshima Yuko, Kojima Haruna, Itano Tomomi, Minegishi Minami, Watanabe Mayu, Shinoda Mariko, Takahashi Minami |
| Word Count: 2131 |
- Entry #25 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1098505#msg1098505) -
| Title: Captain |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Oba Mina, Shimada Haruka; MinaHaruu |
| Word Count: 1272 |
- Entry #26 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1098611#msg1098611) -
| Title: A Promise for Happiness |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Kitahara Rie, Sashihara Rino; RinoRie |
| Word Count: 1676 |
- Entry #27 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1098686#msg1098686) -
| Title: One Bullet |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Iriyama Anna, Abe Maria |
| Word Count: 5349 |
- Entry #28 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1098865#msg1098865) -
| Title: Nakeru Basho |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Akimoto Sayaka, Masuda Yuka; SayaYuka |
| Word Count: 3477 |
- Entry #29 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1099004#msg1099004) -
| Title: Devil & Angel |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Shinoda Mariko, Minegishi Minami, Takahashi Minami, Kojima Haruna; MariMii |
| Word Count: 1469 |
- Entry #30 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1099264#msg1099264) -
| Title: Between Hate and Pain, There is Love |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Itano Tomomi, Yokoyama Yui; Tomomi/Yui |
| Word Count: 3856 |
- Entry #31 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1099395#msg1099395) -
| Title: Wordless |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Maeda Ami, Komori Mika, Sashihara Rino; Ami/Komori |
| Word Count: 3039 |
- Entry #32 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1099661#msg1099661) -
| Title: Words of Encouragement |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Suda Akari, Hata Sawako |
| Word Count: 1707 |
- Entry #33 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1099741#msg1099741) -
| Title: And Darling |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Nakanishi Yuka, Oya Masana, Deguchi Aki, Hiramatsu Kanako; Yuka/Masana |
| Word Count: 6183 |
- Entry #34 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1100010#msg1100010) -
| Title: By the Rooftop |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takayanagi Akane, Oya Masana; MasaChuri |
| Word Count: 2710 |
- Entry #35 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1100138#msg1100138) -
| Title: That 1830m |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takahashi Minami |
| Word Count: 7495 |
- Entry #36 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1100756#msg1100756) -
| Title:Not Letting Go... |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Shinoda Mariko, Takahashi Minami; MariTaka |
| Word Count: 2893 |
- Entry #37 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1100761#msg1100761) -
| Title: A Guide To Marine Life |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Matsui Rena, Kojima Haruna; Rena/KojiHaru |
| Word Count: 2637 |
- Entry #38 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1100907#msg1100907) -
| Title:A Lonely Heart Without Friendship |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takahashi Minami, Oshima Yuko |
| Word Count: 1768 |
- Entry #39 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1100957#msg1100957) -
| Title:Don't Look |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s):Suda Akari |
| Word Count: 1302 |
- Entry #40 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1101309#msg1101309) -
| Title:Fate of Love |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s):Jessica Veranda, Devi Kinal Putri; VeKinali |
| Word Count: 1710 |
- Entry #41 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1101423#msg1101423) -
| Title:Of a Bird and a Peculiar Frog |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s):Furukawa Airi, Takayanagi Akane; Furuyanagi |
| Word Count: 2487 |
- Entry #42 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1101715#msg1101715) -
| Title: Her only reason |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s):Shimazaki Haruka, Mori Anna |
| Word Count: 1267 |
- Entry #43 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1101781#msg1101781) -
| Title: Path of Captain, Path of the Center |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takahashi Minami, Maeda Atsuko, Takamina the 5th, Acchan 13th, Shinonome Kanata, Motomiya Nagisa |
| Word Count: 1283 |
- Entry #44 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1101940#msg1101940) -
| Title: Moving Forward |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Akimoto Sayaka, Miyazawa Sae, Matsui Jurina, Oshima Yuko; SaeYaka |
| Word Count: 2999 |
- Entry #45 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1102052#msg1102052) -
| Title: Little Monster |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s):Gakuran, Gekikara; Gakuran/Gekikara |
| Word Count:1898 |
- Entry #46 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1102118#msg1102118) -
| Title: Cat on the Ribbon |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takahashi Minami, Kojima Haruna, Minegishi Minami and Shinoda Mariko; KojiTaka |
| Word Count: 2837 |
- Entry #47 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1102300#msg1102300) -
| Title:Good Night |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Miyazawa Sae, Akimoto Sayaka |
| Word Count: 1271 |
- Entry #48 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1102398#msg1102398) -
| Title: Home |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Yamamoto Sayaka, Watanabe Miyuki, Matsui Rena; SayaMilky, Sayaka/Rena |
| Word Count: 2657 |
- Entry #49 (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1102476#msg1102476) -
| Title:What if... |
| Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Kasai Tomomi, Itano Tomomi, Shinoda Mariko; TomoTomo |
| Word Count:2589 |
We recommend you to keep an eye on our tumblr (http://contest48.tumblr.com/) too, since updates will be fastest there!
Confused about anything? Feel free to pm us with your question(s), or ask them in this thread and we’ll do our best to get back to you promptly!
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First entry came really fast! We were surprised, but also excited. Keep up the good work everyone! :thumbup
Entry #1
Title: Atsui
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Yokoyama Yui, Matsui Rena, Kitahara Rie; Yui/Rena
Word Count: 3195
Atsui
Notes: I do explore a couple of other pairings, but they’re not part of the main focus. Tsurai means painful. And even if the real chicken wasn’t, for purposes of this story the chicken is boneless.
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I needed to meet you.
I’d already tried to be an idol before I knew about you. I auditioned for the same group as you before then, I could have known you sooner, but I failed. I was ready to give up, there was no point, if SKE48 wouldn’t accept me I wouldn’t be able to find another opportunity, certainly not near Kiyoto. I was prepared to move as far as Nagoya, but it didn’t matter if I wasn’t good enough for them.
But then one night I was watching Shukan AKB, because I felt like torturing myself with the life I wasn’t good enough for. I was going to turn it off, until it said it was focusing on the Gekikara Club. That caught my attention. I decided to keep watching and see if any of these idols were actually worthy of membership of such a club. I was moderately impressed early on, but then they got onto that last one. I watched as everyone else in the club tried and immediately failed, one by one they started crying and needing emergency mouth-cooling, it was amusing to watch, but clearly they just hadn’t had enough spicy food.
And then you volunteered. I hadn’t really noticed you hadn’t tried yet, you were just another girl. But then they said you didn’t eat meat. And suddenly you were tearing through the whole thing, eating it all up without so much as a pause. I’d only seen one other person eat those before. Myself. Right at that moment you ate my spice-loving heart with the rest of the meat, and I knew I had to meet you.
I couldn’t wait until there was another SKE audition to get in, but there were auditions for AKB48. I was prepared to move my entire life to Tokyo just in case I got the chance to meet you. I wasn’t sure how long it would be to meet you, but I could endure it, if it meant I could see you.
And so I tried. And miraculously, this time I was accepted. If I’d waited for another SKE audition maybe I’d have been able to meet you immediately. But this way I’d have to work to see you. I might even gain confidence to actually ask you out if I build myself up before I meet you, right?
I made alot of friends in that year, and I loved them, but my aim was always on meeting you, and I worked hard for it. I was expecting it wouldn’t take too long at first, but then a few months into my time as a Kenkyuusei suddenly AKB48 was the most popular idol group in Japan. And you were one of the most popular members. I was just an unknown, one of the 9th generation Kenkyuusei. There was no way you’d notice me.
Even when I managed to get onto a single it was in such a way you’d never see me. Not for all of the other members on that song. If someone of your popularity even had the time to watch the Theatre Girls MV at all. I’m guessing not.
But being on Boku no YELL, all the work, even serving as one of the most popular member’s Under for a time, all that was unimportant to me. All that mattered was that I met you. And I was going to do it if it killed me.
And then I was promoted suddenly. I’d been working hard, everyone knew that but I hadn’t imagined of my generation I’d be the first to become a member. I cried that night, on stage, because of how happy I was. I cried in bed that night, because I was now one step closer to you.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my work, I love the friends I made, and I love the fans. But if I couldn’t meet you, couldn’t talk with you once, I didn’t care about anything else. That was the thought that kept me going.
The first time I really had a chance to be near you was during the Request Hour Concert. But we were all so busy at that time, getting ready to be in the next costume there was never any time to speak. And even when I was waiting for a chance on the last day, before you went out for the last set of songs, you were always too engrossed in some other girl. A captain, an ace, whoever, you were always talking with someone else and I could tell you liked them. I wanted to bond with you over our shared love of spicy food. But you probably didn’t even realise I’d be performing with you until I was performing Heavy Rotation on stage. At the back. Away from you. And even if you did notice me then, I’m sure that, to you, I was just a girl filling in for one who’d left. Maybe you’d actually known her.
Even being in a unit didn’t draw you. I was right in the front of the units songs from the start, but I don’t think you’d have ever noticed me. Because I’m just a new girl. And you don’t know about my spicy tastes.
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I was talking happily with my friend, but then I saw you were staring at me. Once you noticed I could see you, you turned away. I was glad. That way you couldn’t see me blush. Still, I didn’t know you. You were just the girl taking Erena’s place.
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And then suddenly I had my chance. Placed in Senbatsu for Everyday, Kachuusha. Even if I didn’t get to speak with you during the recording, the PV shooting would take a day, at least. We shared quite a few scenes, but the were all group scenes. I did get to see you in a bikini, and you were so very beautiful wearing it, I even go to be near you during the choreography. The only problem was, even closer were the ones who you spoke to often. Even when we took a break they were busy talking others. I decided to talk to you then. But when I came up to you, my lips failed me. I couldn’t say a thing. No matter how much I wanted to. You smiled at me oddly, and walked away. I felt like drowning. I cried alot that night. Kitarie comforted me, and I had to tell her why. She was a wonderful source of comfort afterwards, and the only one I could confide in. She helped me feel better, and was even willing to help me act out some of my wishes, using her in your place. I must have killed her mouth with spice more than once.
It was around that time we filmed Majisuka Gakuen 2 as well, wasn’t it. It took everything I had not to stare at you all the time when we had scenes together. I relaxed when we were between scenes, and I know you must have caught me once. I’m surprised you didn’t keep your distance when I wasn’t around. And honestly? I liked you best as Gekikara.
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You walked up to me as we were filming the summer PV. You opened your mouth, but you didn’t say anything. If there had been anyone near me I’d have assumed you were struck by their beauty, but there was only me. I had to leave you there, which was probably embarrassing, and I’m sorry. Thing is, I was too embarrassed myself.
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‘Dai, Jyukyu! AKB48, Team K! Yokoyama Yui’
Senbatsu, really? From the Sousenkyou? I was happy, of course. Happy to have earned so much support over the year, and it was that which lead to me crying. But I was also happy I’d get to be near to you for another song. Kitarie was the only one who knew what I wasn’t voicing in my speech.
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I’d kept forgetting your name. Even if you embarrassed me the way you stared, I couldn’t remember the name. After the Sousenkyou, and how you’d cried, you were always going to stick in my memory. Honestly the way you cried, I wanted to give you a big hug right then.
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After I didn’t get to talk with you at all during filming for Flying Get, I decided to cut my losses. I still wanted desperately to know you, but I was certain I’d never succeed. Paruru and I had held a close friendship, and so I decided to be with her, in the hope that in time she might help me forget you and I would love her like she loved me. I never told her how I felt. But my feelings never faded.
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After finally remembering your name, I’d bought Not Yet’s first single, and pre-ordered the second. I’d watch the PVs over multiple times, watching you in them. I liked you.
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When the time came to prepare for Kaze wa Fuiteiru, and start practising our instruments for GIVE ME FIVE!, I did my best to avoid looking at you. I still found myself doing it all too often though. But you never saw me.
-----------------------------------
During the entire time spent practising and filming and recording for Kaze wa Fuiteiru and GIVE ME FIVE!, I don’t think you looked at me once. I wondered if I’d done something, or you liked someone else now. I’d really started to like you, especially having seen you eat something spicy on AKBINGO! without trouble. I was sad. I cried on the only shoulder available. I just didn’t tell her why.
I managed to keep up the façade of not loving you, and actually loving Paruru, going until around Christmas time. It almost certainly helped that neither of us were in the Janken Single, and we weren’t paired for Noel no Yoruu. The only person who knew I had feelings for you was Kitarie. I felt guilty about lying to Paruru about my feelings to her, but Kitarie kept on telling me my feelings would change if I stayed with her. Even so, Kitarie still helped me live out some fantasies of you. I think I loved her more than I ever did Paruru. But never more than I loved you. Besides, she had Sasshi.
Me being able to pretend stopped at Kohaku. When I saw you on that stage, singing that song (I can’t even remember who you were with), I found myself wanting to do everything you asked in the song. I just wanted to change one little thing. Instead of Chocolate, could we make it Tsurai Curry.
If I’m honest, I’d also wound up in the time leading up to Kohaku been fooling around with Sakiko as well, in an attempt to keep me distracted from you. We’d agreed that when we sung Anata to Christmas Eve together we’d mean what we sang to eachother. And I thought with her I might have actually have managed to tell the truth. But I felt awful when I sung it there, because I was singing like I meant it. And lying to her like that felt horrible.
I let both girls enjoy their Christmases believing I loved them, and broke things off with them a couple of days into the new year. I tried to break things off with Kitarie as well, but she told me, and she was right, that I still needed an outlet.
-----------------------------------
When I saw you singing that song, I cried. It felt like you meant those words to her. It might have been selfish, but I wanted you to say those words to me.
-----------------------------------
The instant I heard about your photobook, I had to buy it. It let me see a new side of you. And I kind of liked it. Still, I tried to avoid looking at you when we were at work. Doesn’t mean I succeeded.
Then when Manatsu no Sounds Good! came, I saw you in a bikini again. I stared constantly. At least with all of the others, it was hard to be sure I was looking at you at all. No-one would have noticed. Unless you knew to look for it.
And then, just so I had more trouble keeping myself from embarrassing you and destroying what happiness you had, we wound up both being in the Google Senbatsu. I decided not to talk to you, after a little debate.
-----------------------------------
It’s funny how much I’d gained interest in you over that year. When you failed to speak to me a year ago, I just thought you were cute. Now you didn’t seem to look at me, and I was left sad, now I was the one who wanted to speak to you, but was scared. At least I could see you like that, while able to hide it easily.
When Not Yet’s single came out, I immediately bought it, specifically the version you sung on. I loved the song. And your voice was to die for. In fact, I think I would.
-----------------------------------
‘Dai, Jyugo! AKB48, Team K! Yokoyama Yui!’
Senbatsu again. Of course I wanted it. Of course I was grateful to my fans for it. But I’d been expecting, with the smaller Senbatsu, that I wouldn’t be voted in. And I thought that might have been best, to keep me from you. But we were in Senbatsu. And this time my position would be closer to you. I had to control myself. I cried with happiness.
-----------------------------------
Secretly I was very happy that Jurina came higher than me. It meant I didn’t get further away from you, the girl that caught my attention. You’d actually come closer. You were crying again. I wanted to hug you. And so much more.
-----------------------------------
I was glad none of the song shuffles put us together. Well of course I’d have liked it, but I don’t think I’d have resisted trying something on you. And I didn’t want to scare you.
Still, why did it have to be shared between AKB and NMB. I mean NMB was obviously closer to Kiyoto, and I suppose Akimoto-Sensei couldn’t know my love was in Nagoya. But I wish I’d had the opportunity to be closer to you.
-----------------------------------
Yui stepped off of the train in Nagoya, Rie following after her. They were booked into a hotel there for the night, before tomorrow Rie had to meet with SKE members to get to know them, and Yui was going to Osaka the next day to meet with NMB and see the theatre. They passed by Sunshine Sakae on the way there, and Yui thought about how much simpler things might have been if she’d gotten to perform there at the beginning. But that was so long ago.
They arrived at the hotel, and after going up to their room and leaving their bags, wondered what they should do for the evening. Yui wanted to visit the restaurant that had been where Rena was when Yui discovered her, but Rie said that just a walk would be a better idea, and they could get some food from the restaurant on the way back, and take it up to their room. Yui got to order the food, deciding on two of the really spicy chicken, and a few other assorted ends. While she was doing this, Rie had gone outside, and was calling someone, Yui didn’t think much of it, Rie was always phoning Rino to reassure her, and it was more frequent since Rino had left for Fukuoka.
Back in their room, they ate the more mild stuff for their dinner, and then Yui spoke up after sitting in silence for a while.
“Rie, I’m sorry, but can we…”
Rie looked uneasily towards the door while interrupting, Yui wondered if Rino was coming for a surprise visit. But then Rie picked up one of the pieces of spicy chicken,
“Daijobu Yui. Now open wide..”, before Rie placed one end of the chicken into her own mouth (Yui could already see the pain on her face, and felt guilty), and brought it closer to Yui’s face. Yui happily opened her own mouth and received the chicken, eating through it slowly until her lips reached Rie’s, she pulled the last of the chicken out of Rie’s mouth, but didn’t break the kiss, leaving her eyes closed as their tongues flitted across eachother, she tasted the spice left on Rie’s tongue. She knew Rie couldn’t handle her spiciness as well as her. After several seconds of kissing Rie broke the kiss.
“Rena-san,” the words escaped Yui’s lips. She felt guilty now, even if Rie knew what Yui was really thinking, surely Rie must feel something for her to keep on like this. Rie stood up and went to take a shower. Yui curled up into a ball to feel guilty for a moment, then closed her eyes and tried to get to sleep.
**********
Yui felt something on her lips. She didn’t dare open her eyes, and she couldn’t be sure how long it had been, but it seemed Rie had forgiven her, and was trying to feed her the other piece of chicken, perhaps a bit forcefully. She consented, opening her lips just enough to allow the meat passage, so that she could slowly nibble down it, she wanted to savour the taste. She could tell when she got to the end though, that the lips were not Rie’s. And she could hear the shower still running.
Yui opened her eyes, about to move and scream for Rie’s help, never mind what state of undress the girl was in. Instead she opened her eyes to find that the lips belonged to a a girl of around 20, with a beautiful face accented by brown eyes and hair.
Matsui Rena was kissing her.
“Konbanwa” came the shy words from the girl, who had just broken the kiss. Yui just stared up at her speechless, unable to believe that Matsui Rena, the girl she had admired from afar for so long, had kissed her. But at the same time she was happier than she had been for months.
“Rie-chan said you had something to tell me,” Rena said, “And I think you’ve wanted to say it for quite a while now”.
Yui struggled to form the words, but finally managed to let out ‘Daisuki’.
Rena smiled shyly, then pulled her up to kiss her again. “You know, Yui, I’ve been meaning to say the same thing.”
Tsurai Curry kuchi utsush shite
Itsumo no kiss ja tsumannai yo
Gouin ni nejikonde…
-
Second day, second entry! :heart: Please feel free to leave your thoughts in this thread too! Authors surely will appreciate any kind of feedback :)
Entry #2
Title: The Quick Shot
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Matsui Jurina, Itano Tomomi, Yagami Kumi, Nito Moeno; Jurina/Tomomi
Word Count: 2522
The Quick Shot
Note: This is something I’d like to call soft-crack.
Matsui Jurina; Center Forward of Akihabara High School’s Varsity Field Hockey team sighs for the nth time in ten minutes. Her team mates, already used to this behavior, simply go about their after-practice routines. The reason for Jurina’s sighs, on the other hand, was at the other side of the room and totally oblivious to the young girls lovelorn stares.
“You need to stop that.” Jurina turns her head to her right and sees Yagami Kumi, goal keeper of the team, staring at her with an eyebrow raised. “It’s creepy.” Kumi adds.
“Sorry.” the younger girl sighs once more “It’s just that she’s so…”
“’Beautiful, talented, amazing and she’s just so Itano freaking Tomomi’,” Kumi finishes “yeah, I know, you won’t shut up about it. Look Juju you need make a decision; either you go up to her and you tell her that you’ve been hot for her since your first day here or you give up, let her graduate without her knowing your feelings and you will forever stare at her from a distance for the rest of your life sighing, looking like a freak and most probably homeless.”
“Kumi it’s not that easy.” Jurina shakes her head “Whenever I try speaking to her it fails miserably.”
“That’s no excuse kid.” Another one of her team mates; Moeno Nito, the team’s Sweeper says “The Captain isn’t gonna be here forever, you need to man up besides you’re Miracle Rookie Matsui best forward we’ve had in years, our only hope at the League Championship, you are so good they made you the first freshman in this team ever, you are the exception Juju and confessing your undying need to bang Tomochin should be cake walk.”
“I don’t want to ‘bang’ her Nito, don’t be so crude.” Jurina answers “I want to get to know her better, I want to know what favorite color is, I want to know if she likes nose kisses or forehead kisses, I just want to hold her. I want to be with her, man.”
“That is just so precious.” Kumi smiles.
“That is cheesy and stupid,” Nito deadpans then points towards Tomomi, who was still obliviously conversing with other people. “Look at that girl and tell me you don’t want to be on that!”
“I’m too young to be thinking of that.” Jurina shakes her head.
Nito stares at Jurina, as if not believing what she just said and just as was about to call her out on it someone clearing their throat catches the three girls’ attention.
“Hey guys.” Itano Tomomi, team captain and right forward greets them. Wasn’t she at the other side of the room like five seconds ago?
“Hey Captain!” Kumi and Nito greet back.
“Hurghg…” Jurina on the other hand fails miserably at forming a coherent greeting.
“You okay Jurina?” Tomomi asks.
“Uh ahem um yeah- I just- s-something in my throat.” Jurina replies, with a blush.
“Welp look at the time, I gotta get going.” Nito announces. “Things to do, you know that sort of thing!”
“Oh uh yeah!” Kumi adds. “Nito’s my ride so…bye.”
Jurina watches them gather their things in horror. They can’t leave her alone with Tomomi. Looking around she sees she’s literally alone with the Captain. The locker room was empty. Where the hell did everyone go? The two seniors wave their goodbyes and when Tomomi turns to face Jurina once again, the two begin making wild pointing gestures and hearts towards the Captain, concluding with a thumbs up from Kumi and crude pelvic thrusts from Nito.
“Jurina?” The aforementioned girl shakes her head and looks at the captain who was staring at her expectantly.
“Y-yes Captain?”
“You want a ride home?”
“I wouldn’t want to impose…”
“Don’t be silly, it’s something I’ve wanted to do for a while anyway.” Tomomi giggles and takes her hand. “Come on.”
Jurina squeaks and gapes at the hand holding hers. This was happening. Itano freaking Tomomi was holding her hand. Oh man it was so smooth and so soft and so freaking Tomochin. Of course with realization that this was actually happening followed the realization that she had not moved an inch and that Tomomi was looking at her strangely.
“Is something wrong?”
“Uh…” Crap Jurina think of something “I just…” be smooth Jurina. You can do it!
“You just wha-”
“I think you’re beautiful!” Jurina mentally facepalms at her ouburst. That wasn’t very smooth, damnit Matsui!
“Um thank you?” Tomomi smiles, confusedly.
“Yeah the way the sun hits your hair from this angle,” Poor Jurina just can’t stop herself. “really makes you glow…like glow… you know because you already glow even when the sun isn’t on you which is awesome by the way but this makes you glow even more, l-like it could be a super power the way you glow. We could call you Glow Girl or s-something.”
“Uh…” Tomomi is obviously confused.
“L-let’s just go!”
The car ride to Jurina’s house was filled with an awkward sort of silence that was broken every now and then by Jurina directing Tomomi to her home. Jurina was getting frustrated with each passing minute, how hard was it to talk to a girl? What would she even talk about? The weather? Jurina highly doubts that’s an interesting topic choice. Confessing was out of the question for reasons that were obvious only to Jurina. She just wanted to speak to the girl without sounding brain dead. She wanted to be the Captain’s friend.
Friendship is enough, right?
It couldn’t hurt to be friends with the girl of your dreams, right? There was no was no way they could be more. Besides, being friends meant hugs, friends hug and she wanted hugs from Tomomi… and kisses. Do friends kiss? Damn it all to hell this wasn’t going to work. Jurina is young though and maybe this attraction to the Captain is probably a phase of some sort she’d get over right?
Right?
…
Damn it.
“Turn left into the next street, it’s the first house on the right.” Tomomi follows the directions without saying a word, arriving at Jurina’s home shortly after.
“Thank you Captain.” Jurina bows her head shyly.
“It’s no problem, take it as a way of saying thanks.” Tomomi smiles.
“Thanks?”
“Yeah, for working so hard during practice and during matches; I know it must be hard for you to be in the team considering you’re a freshman and all. You just started high school and here we are resting our hopes of winning the League on your shoulders. It’s not fair so if you ever need someone to talk to you or to help you with anything you come to me, okay?”
Jurina nods, a little awed by the Captain’s concern.
“Good.” Tomomi smiles. “It’s the least I could do since it was me who demanded you join the team.”
“I’m happy for the opportunity.” Jurina replies enthusiastically “I love Hockey and I was so stoked to learn that I was considered for try outs and even more stoked when I got in, and here I am so it should me thanking you.”
“You’re a good kid Jurina.” The Captain ruffles her hair “Now run along, little puppy.”
***
“Did you bang her yet?”
“No Nito.” Jurina sighs, closing her locker.
“Did you at least make any progress with her?” Kumi asks.
“Well…” Jurina grimaces and tells her two seniors all that transpired. When she finished Kumi and Nito were silent for a beat and then began laughing very crazily. The other students in the hallway watched in amusement as Jurina starts screaming at her team mates in order to get them to shut up.
“MOENO!” A shrill voice screams out, thus canceling out all noise. Nito slowly turns her head to the end of the hallway and there she sees something out of a horror movie, well for her at least, heading towards her.
“C-chiyuu baby!” Kumi squeaks and smiles nervously at her livid girlfriend
“Don’t you ‘Chiyuu baby’ me, Moeno!” Kasai Tomomi aka Chiyuu; member of the school Choir and Nito’s somewhat eccentric girlfriend, was livid. “You were supposed to meet me at my locker two minutes ago!”
“Baby! Kumi and I-”
“Don’t bring me into this!”
“-were just checking on Jurina!” At the mention of the freshman’s name Chiyuu perks up immediately and greets the young girl with a vicious hug.
“Juju!” The girls squeals. “How are you this morning?”
“I’m fine Chiyuu.”
“Chiyuu baby, would you please tell Jurina how hot her and Tomochin would look together?” Nito pleads, in attempt to keep the heat off of her.
“Your Captain?” Chiyuu asks “Aw! Juju has a crush?”
“More like a deep infatuation that can either be love or some serious creepiness.” Kumi deadpans.
“Guys can we not do this.” Jurina groans “Class is about to start.”
“You’ve been saved by academics little one.” Nito says, taking Chiyuu’s hand and walking off too their first class.
“This conversation isn’t over.” Kumi declares. “See you later, little puppy.” Jurina grumbles and turns the opposite direction only to nearly crash into the center of most of her thoughts these days.
“Hey now, save that aggression for the field Rookie.”
“C-captain! Oh man, I’m so sorry!”
“It’s okay.” Tomochin chuckles and pats the girl’s head. “By the way; how about I give you a ride home again today, and before you say it I won’t take no for an answer.”
“Well…if you insist.”
“I do.”
“Okay then.”
“Cool, meet me at the entrance after school, enjoy your day little puppy.” Tomochin waves and is about to walk away until Jurina calls her name. “Yes?”
“Why do you call me little puppy?”
“Because you look like a little puppy to me.”
“I’m taller than you though…”
“Ah…but I’m older.”
“That makes no sense, Captain.”
“Makes sense to me, kid.”
“But…”
“I am a senior and you are but a freshman, go to class peasant.”
“At least I’m not old!”
“Oh kid you are so lucky we need to get to class!”
“If you’re in such a hurry to get to class why aren’t you walking, need a bit of rest for your old bones?”
“Children these days have no respect, are you lost little one, the Kindergarten is across the street.”
“I’ll see you on the field grandma!”
“You bet your sweet ass you will, little puppy!”
It was later on in the day, during Math, that Jurina came to the realization that she had not only had a civilized conversation with Tomomi but there was banter. The length of the conversation does not matter, the point is there was talking and banter! She didn’t stutter one bit during that conversation. With this realization came a sort of feeling from within her. The sort of feeling one would get when one realizes that they have accomplished or are about to accomplish something great.
The sort of feeling she gets just before she scores a point in matches. The sort of feeling she gets at that moment when the ball hits her stick in the penalty area and she has but a second to get the perfect angle. The moment when she hits the ball perfectly and the feeling of accomplishment that follows when you hear the ball hit the back of the goal.
In a simpler term: her kokoro is going doki doki from all the feels.
***
“I’m doing it.”Nito, Kumi and Chiyuu who were leisurely eating their lunch turned to Jurina who sat down and calmly began eating her food.
“What?” Nito stares at Jurina.
“Well, this morning after you guys left I bumped into Tomomi and we talked for a minute and there was banter and I didn’t feel like a total tool for once and it was all because I just went for it, kinda like The Quick Shot, so I’ve decided when I see Tomomi again I’m going to ‘Quick Shot’ it again and confess my feelings for her.” Jurina finishes her jumbled little speech with a wild smile, similar to the she has when she’s got possession of the ball.
“Well you better get your shit together because here comes the Captain.” Kumi says gesturing behind Jurina.
The center forward focuses her attention on Tomomi who was headed their way, she had to wait for the right moment to do this, wait until Tomomi was in the perfect position. It was when Tomomi was at their table and about to say something that Jurina shot up from her seat.
“I think you’re beautiful.” Jurina places a finger on Tomomi’s lips to silence her. “From the moment I saw you on my first day at this school, you have been on my mind. You have a way of doing things with such dedication that I can’t help but admire you. I’m too young to know what love is, so I won’t call what I feel for you that but I do know that it would be really awesome if I could call you my girlfriend.” hugging the Captain’s waist she adds “Have I mentioned that your body is banging?”
“…”
“I’m going to kiss you now.”
And the moment Matsui Jurina’s lips met Itano Tomomi’s and the moment when she felt Tomomi’s hands cup her face was the moment the young girl heard the metaphorical ball hit the metaphorical goal thus completing The Quick Shot. Excited whispers filled the cafeteria and Shinoda Mariko, who runs the school’s blog, wasted no time in photographing this blog worthy moment. The two hockey players part as their moment of romance and sappy shit is broken by Nito.
“Oh my God, finally!” The sweeper throws her hands in the air. Kumi and Chiyuu silence the girl when they see that Tomomi is about to answer the girl.
“Well, I wanted to ask you if you wanted ice-cream this afternoon,” she bites her bottom lip “but I like your idea better.”
“So you’re saying yes?”
“Yes, you silly little puppy, I would love to be your girlfriend.”
“Awesome.” Jurina grins. “Is it too early to make out?”
“Hm, we’ll see how well you do at next week’s game.” Tomomi replies cheekily kissing Jurina once more.
“Ew barf, it hasn’t even been two minutes and I’m already sick of you two!” Nito exclaims.
“Baby leaves them alone.” Chiyuu reprimands her girlfriend. In all this excitement the others failed to see Kumi’s face pale and her body quiver.
“Hey Kumi, are you alright?” Jurina asks taking in her friends distraught expression.
“No…” Kumi whispers.
“Uh Kumi?”
“I’M THE FIFTH WHEEL!”
Sorry Kumi.
-
Entry #3
Title: Playing with Fire
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Shinoda Mariko, Kojima Haruna, Matsui Jurina, Nakanishi Yuuka; MariHaru
Word Count: 2627
Playing with Fire
As the darkness engulfed the city, dangers lurked at every corner, attempting to draw any unsuspecting victims into its vices.
The tall lady took a look at her wristwatch and sighed. “That ass never comes on time.” Taking in a whiff of the air down the filthy alleyway, she shook her head, “Place still stinks like a dumpster. I wonder why every single fucking transaction has to take place here.”
As if on cue, footsteps sounded from being the lady, “Still as foul-mouthed as ever, I suppose, Mariko-sama,” a voice called out. The owner of the voice stuck out a hand and turned the taller lady around, only to find himself faced with a gun aiming right at the center of his forehead.
“If I need to tell you one more fucking time to not touch me, I would rather blow your head off.”
-
The neon lights and loud music hurt Haruna’s head; the girl tried to keep herself stable as she walked along the stretch of clubs, resisting the temptations to step inside one and get herself even more wasted than she already was.
“Alcohol numbs the pain?” she scoffed.
Obviously, it didn’t work for her.
Oblivious to the guy standing at the corner near the far end of the road, Haruna stumbled towards his direction. Giving a knowing nod to his accomplice, both of them went up to the beautiful girl, “Care to spend some time with us?” one asked as the other stuck out his arm to grip on Haruna’s, forcing her into the alleyway.
It must be a stroke of bad luck that the alcohol effects started to kick in while she struggled, making her sight blurred as she felt strength draining from her limbs. Haruna, with the little amount of consciousness left in her, contemplated against shouting for help – in a shady district like this, it might just turn into gang-rape rather than help.
Her senses went into overdrive when they dropped her onto the wet and grimy floor, laughing in perverted joy that they had “finally picked a girl that’s both pretty as the actresses on TV and actually has a gravure-suitable body,” thankful that this girl “is actually drunk enough to have zero resistance”.
Haruna felt sick as one of the guys touched her cheek, willing herself to shut her eyes and prayed for someone to save her from this ordeal. Before she could do so, a shout called out from her right and Haruna could only open her eyes enough to see that the brute’s hand being roughly yanked away by someone. With a blink of an eye, he flew across the air and landed a few feet away, with a distinct sound of the breaking of bones.
She wanted to take a closer look at the person who saved her from the misery but felt the alcohol taking over her bloodstream as sleep engulfed her…
-
A tray of warm porridge, some pills and water greeted Haruna as she slowly peeled open her eyes to take in the unfamiliar surroundings; white curtains lifted and lowered quietly in the gentle breeze, sunlight streaming into the room, warming the pale-blue painted room. She winced as she tried to turn her head, clutching her head as the throbbing headache invaded her senses. Grabbing the pills, Haruna popped them into her mouth, downing them in one shot with the water beside.
“I see you didn’t even check what was given to you…” a voice trailed off as Haruna raised her head to look at the lone figure standing by the door. “What if those are drugs?”
“Jurina! Stop scaring the poor girl,” a smack on the said girl’s head accompanied the reprimand as two persons stepped into the room. “Hi? I’m Nishishi, and this prankster is Jurina,” the girl…well, Haruna wasn’t too sure if the one who spoke was a girl, introduced. “And yes, if you are wondering, I am a girl,” as if reading her thoughts, the Nishishi person added. “Ah, and those are just the regular pain-killers, so don’t worry.”
Haruna nodded, “Thank you. B-but…where am I? And what happened?”
“Ah ah~ All these questions and talk can come later, I think you need sleep now more than anything else,” the Nishishi girl waved her hand to dismiss the questions, pushing the other girl out of the room and gently closed the door behind them.
At least she’s safe, and like what was said, the questions…can wait.
-
“The girl’s up?”
“En, but Nishi told her to sleep more.”
“She didn’t look well enough to leave…”
“And Nishi thought it’s better to look after her for a bit more lest she gets into more trouble going out the streets in such a state.”
“But both of you have a job to handle in like an hour’s time…”
“Yeah, and that’s why me and Jurina are gonna leave her in your care, Mariko-sama~~~”
Nishishi grabbed hold of Jurina’s hand and slung a bag over her shoulders, “So…see you tonight!” and a slam of the door greeted whatever Mariko intended to curse at.
-
Mariko thanked her lucky stars that by the time the mischievous duo was back, the girl was still asleep and she didn’t have to deal with whatever unknown situations there might be. A nagging voice lingered in the eldest’s head – it’s best to get rid of this girl before she knows what they are dealing with.
She couldn’t pinpoint what’s that that made her want to – despite self-battling that she doesn’t – protect this seemingly defenseless girl. Heck, Mariko hasn’t even seen this girl’s face yet. But the eldest knew the best way to protect someone; and that was to let the person remain as clueless as possible.
“I’m gonna call her down for dinner, ‘right?” Nishishi called out as she ran up the stairs with an equally excited puppy, no, Mariko meant Jurina, on her trail. Giving herself a mental facepalm, she looked on as the young pair seemed to enjoy having a new company though making sure that she will go through with them soon about protocols and what’s not.
And also to persuade them enough to let this girl go back to wherever she was from, before divulging too much.
-
Mariko couldn’t take her eyes away from the girl that was walking behind the energetic couple down the stairs as their eyes met and the eldest felt her skin blushed a deep shade of red.
She couldn’t exactly remember the last time she was so mesmerized by anyone; the smooth white skin that Mariko struggled not to caress, the large hazel-colored eyes that seemed to ooze innocence, the thick sexy lips that unconsciously seemed to lure Mariko’s soul into and lastly, the perfect model figure which Mariko’s red shirt hugged tightly around, letting her take a sinful glimpse at the flat tummy that peeped out from the short tee. “Red suits her very well,” Mariko mumbled under her breath sub-consciously.
Snapping out of her trance as the girl took a seat opposite the eldest, Mariko gave Jurina a stern glare upon noticing that the youngest caught her ogling and hoping that it would stop her from making stupid and suggestive comments during dinner.
-
“What’s your name?” Nishishi asked as she popped a piece of chicken into her mouth, slapping Jurina’s hands away from her plate as the youngest tried to steal more food.
“Haruna. Kojima Haruna,” came the reply.
“Nice name.”
Before Mariko could stop herself, the words slipped out of her mouth and she pressed her lips tight.Silence filled the dining room as Jurina’s hands froze in mid-air and Nishishi raising an eyebrow in surprise.
Standing up almost immediately, Mariko excused herself from the table. “I’m full,” she reasoned though knowing that she’d never hear the end of it from Jurina.
-
“I haven’t ask you for your name…”
Bumping into each other on the narrow hallway leading to the showers, Haruna mumbled as she came close to the other girl.
“Mariko,” the taller girl mumbled back before excusing herself from the awkward situation.
A tiny smile crept its way onto Haruna’s lips, “Marrriko.”
Haruna already liked the way the name rolled off her tongue.
-
Lying on her bed and staring at the ceiling, Haruna smiled as she recalled the hectic two days.
First she was saved from being violated by a kid then she was introduced to a boy-like girl who happened to be the kid’s girlfriend, and finally, meeting this fascinating lady who managed to steal her heart without even trying.
She could have been dead two nights before but she didn’t; and you know how people would say about blessings that followed after avoiding a disaster…
Haruna tossed and turned in bed, pulling up her blankets as the cold night wind cooled the room to a degree lower than how she preferred.
“Mariko…”
Haruna was sure that Mariko was the blessing.
-
Mariko tucked her arms beneath her head and stared out of the windows, giving up on catching some sleep before her transaction at two in the morning as images of Haruna flooded her mind. Every time she closed her eyes, the darkness that usually would invaded her senses seemed to explode into a flash of bright light and the innocent look of the new girl would imprint itself in front of Mariko’s closed eyes.
She sighed.
It’s been too long since her last relationship, ended way before she fell into this business and was also the catalyst for her to give up on her prim-and-proper life for this packed fully with adrenaline-rush one.
She sighed again, crawling off her bed and putting on her leather jacket then slipping a gun into her garter-belt.
Probably a couple of hours too early, but the eldest got her gear ready and decided to head out, hoping that the cool night wind could clear her mind.
-
“Where are you going?” a voice called out from behind Mariko as she stood a foot out of the door. Without turning around, she knew it was the new girl; Mariko was sure that Jurina and Nishishi could hardly conjure up such a sweet-sounding melody-like voice even if it kills them.
The door slammed shut in reply to the question.
-
The transaction had been more than smooth; the gun that greeted that prude’s face a few days ago was sufficient to warn him to keep his hands to himself. Mariko jumped off her bike and slid her bag down her arms as she grabbed her keys from the side pockets of her backpack.
“Where did you go?”
Mariko jumped, bag and keys cranking loudly as they hit the pavement. The blood seemed to drain from her face as she looked up at the lone girl sitting by the doorsteps, cursing under her breath.
“Get out of the way.”
“No.”
“……”
“Where did you go?”
“Out.”
It’s Haruna’s turn to get angry; nose flaring slightly in annoyance, hands on her hips and totally blocking the way into the house.
“Do you mind getting the fuck out of the way?”
“Yes.”
“Oh well, the last time I checked, it’s my apartment.”
“…”
“Cat got your tongue? Now if you don’t mind, please get out of the way.”
“Why can’t you just say where you went?”
“WHY MUST YOU KNOW?!”
Mariko glared back in irritation, words flying out faster than her brain could comprehend.
“The fuck are you guys screaming in the middle of the night for?”
Haruna turned, coming face to face with an irritated looking Jurina and an equally annoyed Nishishi behind. “Can’t you guys wait till the morning?” Jurina wrinkled her nose in disgust, shaking her head at the two adults who looked just like kids bickering and turned her back, dragging her tired body back to her room.
Nishishi shrugged. “Oh by the way? Mari-sama, the toilet flooded your room. I don’t think you want to go back in there before the carpet dries,” she added before following the youngest up into their shared room.
“WHAT? WHERE THE FUCK AM I GOING TO SLEEP AT NOW?”
A bedroom slipper flew down the stairs, landing menacingly near Mariko.
“Shut up.”
-
Trying to find a comfortable spot on the sofa, Mariko squirmed around trying to get comfy, only to scowl in annoyance. “How the hell does Jurina sleep on this thing?”
“We can share my bed if you want,” a soft voice suggested, tugging gently on the other girl’s blanket.
Mariko tugged on the blanket before throwing it over her head, “No thanks.”
-
The eldest wrapped her body around the pillow, wincing upon contact with the red welts on her arms and closed her eyes. A feathery touch ghosted over the scratches, “I’m sorry,” the other girl whispered, pulling the blanket up to cover the both of them.
Mariko sighed.
As much as she was pissed to be dragged into the room, she found out that there was no way for her to stay angry at Haruna for long. Not with those increasingly seductive eyes, pouty full lips and milky soft skin that made Mariko just want to ravage.
Nope, not possible to stay angry at.
Haruna swung an arm possessively around the older girl and sighed, pulling the girl into her embrace.
“I’m sorry…”
-
“You know…”
Mariko let her voice trailed off; listening to the other girl’s steady breathing, fingers playing with Haruna’s and scooting deeper into her embrace, “I wish I could love you back too…”
“If I wasn’t playing with fire…”
-
Yet another night of transactions at ungodly hours, she sighed as she slung the empty bag over her shoulders, pulling the straps to tighten them against her back and jumped onto her bike. Forgoing the helmet for the night, “It’s just 5 minutes away anyway,” she enjoyed the cooling night wind as they caressed her face.
She enjoyed the midnight trips; while the world was sleeping, transactions happened. The silent was sliced open with her noises from her bike, the gentle wind turned nasty as she sped on the empty highway and her thoughts echoed in her head louder than she would like them to be.
A lot had happened over the past few months; someone barged into her life without warning, and then left without either, leaving her torn and tattered. It hurt; it hurt so badly that she didn’t want to continue with life.
“How was the transaction?”
The taller girl came down to the driveway and carried the other girl off her bike, breaking her train of thoughts. She gave her a smile, a curt nod and leaned closer, leaving a chaste kiss on the other girl’s lips. “I miss you already…”
Life, it is full of surprises, she reckoned.
A twist of events let her picked up her life once again and this time round, the intruder was the one who stuck all the band-aids around her heart and waited as the wounds healed under her love. It was love at first sight for both of them, but it took a little more persuasion for the other girl before they got together, and they are both glad they did.
“Another night of thinking?” The taller girl asked, hooking arms with her girlfriend as they stepped into the house.
“I’m sorry I got you into playing with fire as well…”
-
Entry #4
Title: Bath: An AKB0048 Fic
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Yuihan the 6th, Kitarie the 8th; YuiRie
Word Count: 2638
Bath: An AKB0048 Fic
“They say that Yuihan the 6th and Kitarie the 8th often shared baths” - Kanzaki Sukuko, AKB0048 77th Generation Kenkyuusei, Year 0048.
Year 0033
Kenkyuusei Watanabe Asuka ran down the corridors of the 00 housing, heading straight for the bathroom, desperate to get to the bath before anyone else. The first two doors to bathrooms were locked, but the third was unlocked so she tore in, threw her towel to the side, and jumped into the bath.
“Asuka-chan?”
Looking up, she realised the bath was already occupied, a girl was sat at the other end, the taps between them. She was probably sat on her legs. It explained why there was already water anyway. Worst of all though it was one of her room-mates, Kojima Yousai.
“Ah, gomen Yousai-chan, the door .. ah.. I’ll go”
“Daijobu. You’ve seen me like this now, no point worrying about it, we may as well share it.”
“Hontoni?”
“Yes. Stay like this and we’re even.”, Yousai started to scrub Asuka’s leg with the soap, “Here, take the other soap,scrub my legs would you?”
“H-Hai.” Asuka took the soap, and helped Yousai wash her legs.
***************
After that night the two sharing baths became a regular occurrence, they’d help eachother wash. Initially Asuka found the prospect, unnerving, and was always looking anywhere but at Yousai, even she was helping her wash. She slowly got used to the idea, eventually joining Yousai in bathing without having to be prompted. They spent time together alot when not in practice as well, Yousai taking her out to meals. It was when they went out for some curry that Asuka discovered her love of spicy food, and soon developed a taste for all kinds of spicy foods. But to Asuka, it was always just friendly, even as she now looked at Yousai when they bathed. Until one night.
“Hey, Yousai.” Yousai looked across the bath at Asuka, who was still in the middle of scrubbing Yousai’s leg, Yousaid had already finished Asuka’s and had been relaxing, enjoying the warm water and the way Asuka scrubbed along her leg. ‘Yousai, how come you were so willing to let me bathe with you?’
For the first time since this habit of theirs had started, Asuka saw Yousai seemed to be the nervous one, looking down. Asuka was surprised, and decided to stop scrubbing. Yousai looked back up “Why’d you stop? You’re not done yet.”
Asuka pouted “Until Yousai-chan tells me, I won’t clean Yousai-chan anymore”
Yousai sighed, and then, to Asuka’s surprise, pushed herself across the bath to Asuka’s end, bringing her face only a few centimetres from Asuka’s own.
“Y-Yousai-chan?”
Whatever response Asuka had been expecting, it hadn’t been this. After a few seconds, she suddenly felt Yousai’s lips pressed against hers. She was shocked, but now understood. Whatever response she had been expecting, it hadn’t been this. But now, it was clearly the only possible reason there could have been. She was about to recoil in horror, or at least shock, but she realised that in actuality, she quite liked it. In fact, she really liked it. But just as she was about to kiss back, Yousai pulled away herself.
“Gomen, Asuka. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean.. I …”
Suddenly Yousai was out of the bath, grabbed her towel, and ran out of the bathroom.
“Yousai-chan, matte!” but Yousai was gone, and she’d taken the towel with her, which was bad since up until now they’d been using one towel between them and helping eachother dry, meaning she was left in the bathroome with just both of their’s clothes.
It took Asuka 5 minutes after getting out of the bath to work up the courage to creep over to one of the other bathrooms and grab a towel. After drying herself and wrapping the towel carefully around herself, she picked up both her own and Yousai’s clothes, and put them in the laundry basket to be washed, before returning to her room. Yousai wasn’t there, so she pulled on some clean clothes and went to search for her.
She found Yousai curled up on a sofa in the common room, she didn’t look up when the door closed, but she probably knew who it was. Asuka sat down next to the girl, who was certainly horribly embarrassed, and put rubbed her back.
“Yousai-chan, look at me,” Yousai didn’t move, “Yousai, if you don’t look at me I’ll never forgive you.”
Yousai pulled herself up and turned to face her, still curled up, Asuka could see now she’d been crying.
“Gomen, Asuka. I must have scared you … I.. I didn’t mean….”
The rest of Yousai’s words were blocked by the fact that Asuka had carelessly placed her lips over Yousai’s. But as Yousai relaxed, it became evident that she had, in fact, meant it.
**********************
The pair grew closer after that night, spending ever more time together as just the two of them, going on dates to eat out, see movies, and just enjoying eachother’s company, kissing and hugging eachother. But Asuka would always look forward to bath night. And then everything changed.
*******************************
They had just completed a Kenkyuusei performance at the 0048 theatre, when suddenly Tomasaki-Sensei, the theatre manager came out onto the stage.
“I have an important announcement!”
The two girls held eachother in excitement.
“It has been decided that one of these Kenkyuusei will be promoted, and join the ranks of the Successors!”
Neither girl expected it to be them.
“The new member will be the 8th person to bear the name of Kitahara Rie, known as Kitarie. That person is..”
The girls held their breath, wondering which of their fellow Kenkyuusei would be selected.
“Your knew Kitarie is … Kojima Yousai!”
Yousai was very shocked to hear her name called out, but stepped forwards all the same, and was handed the mike to give a thank you speech to her fans for supporting her up until now, asking them to continue to do so. Asuka didn’t pay much attention to it, she was just standing in shock, scared, feeling certain she’d lose her friend, her love.
****************
When Asuka returned to her room that night, she found that Yousai, no Kitaire’s things had already been moved, no doubt to one of the Successor bedrooms in the Successors own wing. She was happy for Kitarie, of course, but she felt there was no way a Successor would want to be seen with a Kenkyuusei.
From that day on, and for a few months afterwards, Asuka didn’t spend any time with Kitarie, both due to her certainty Kitaire would want to only spend time with Successors, and because she didn’t want to get in the way. Kitaire would call her from time to time, but Asuka always ignored her phone when she did.
One night, about three months after Kitarie’s promotion, Asuka went to the bathroom and sat there thinking. She knew most of her fellow Kenkyuusei had already bathed, and the Successors were on their way back from a concert, so she wasn’t worried about causing trouble for anybody else wanting the bath.
Suddenly she heard someone coming in through the door, she looked about to tell them to go only to find Kitarie walking towards her.
“Kitarie-san” she said, as her once friend walked towards her, pulling off her clothes as she did so.
“You don’t have to make it so formal Asuka” the girl laughed, before stepping into the bath opposite her. “Now then, it’s been a while since we did this hasn’t it?”
“I .. I thought…”
“What?”
“I thought you wouldn’t want to be seen with me since I’m a kenkyuusei.”
A laugh responded to that, before Kitarie spoke “Did you even read my messages? I haven’t been to eat with you in months and I’ve been missing you. Don’t assume things like that please. Otherwise I’ll never forgive you”
Asuka blushed, and then pushed herself toward Kitarie, so their faces nearly touched. “Gomen, Kitarie-san,” and the next thing Kitarie knew, she’d been pulled into the best kiss they’d ever shared.
********************************
All of Asuka’s worries were destroyed in that moment, and things went back to how they’d been before Kitarie’s promotion, they went to movies, had dinner, kissed and hugged eachother, and Asuka wasn’t sure if she could ever be happier. Kitarie had her own bathroom attached to her room, but she still often came to the bath they’d first shared to be with Asuka.
About a month after they got together again, Asuka was told she’d be serving as the stand-in for Acchan the 9th at the next concert. Since the song membership for the setlist had been shuffled since the former Center Nove, Yuuko the 7th graduated a couple of months earlier, this meant Asuka would be serving as the Center for the last song of the night, Flying Get, though the rest of the songs she wouldn’t have as much exposure. All the same, it was a song she’d already performed as the Center for numerous times in Kenkyuusei stages, making her the best choice to perform.
She enjoyed the concert night, putting her best effort to performing each and every song, including being able to share a microphone with Kitarie when they performed Heavy Rotation. She also took note of the fact that Mayuyu Mk 2 didn’t seem to put much emotion into her singing, even when she performed the solo song FIRST LOVE.
At last it was time for Flying Get, her uniform changed to the flowery design they would all be wearing for the song, and she took her place crouched behind her sempai, two others crouched next to her, Mayuyu MK 2 on her left, Tomo~mi the 7th on her right. The music began, and on cue she rose up, followed at the appropriate moment by her sempai on each side. As she reached the climax of the first chorus, she almost felt as though she was glowing, but continued putting in all of the effort she had, and as she danced through the solo, she never noticed a new Kirara spawning. As she got into the second chorus, she was now far more certain she was glowing somehow, and when she hit the climax of that last chorus, she felt the light surround her for a moment, but then just as suddenly see could see the crowd cheering as she performed the last dance of the song, and held her position. She then went backstage to catch her breath before the encore, as she wasn’t needed for the first two songs, she’d come back to perform Aitakatta with the sempai.
When she stepped on stage to perform though, before the music could start Tomasaki-san suddenly appeared again.
“I am here to announce that the decision on the new Center Nova has been made!”
***********************
Asuka stood stock still next to Kitarie, waiting for Tomosaki-san to continue.
“The new Center Nova will be a newly promoted member. Stepping into the role of Center Nova, as well as that of Yokoyama Yui the 6th, I present to you Yuihan, Watanabe Asuka”
Asuka stood stock still. Then tears started to stream down her face as Kitarie nudged her forwards to stand with Tomosaki-san.
“Yuihan, please give a few words to your fans” he said, handing her the microphone. Tears streaming down her face, she took it.
“H-hai, AKB0048 no Yuihan, Yokoyama Yui desu.” She started, trying to control herself. It had been hard enough to remember what to call herself. “Miina-sama, arigatou gozaimasu. Thank you for supporting me up until now, and I hope I will work hard enough to live up to your expectations. Honestly, this is very surprising to me, I never expected to be appointed to this role. Hontoni, Arigatou gozaimasuta!” She bowed, starting to get control of her breath, even as the crowd repeated over and over: “Yuihan! Yuihan! Yuihan!”
She was allowed to recover whilst Tomosaki-san left the stage, before the captain, Sayaka the 8th, announced the last song, and invited Yuihan to the center for her first act as Center Nova.
**********************
Whilst Katyusha returned to Akibastar after the concert, Tomosaki-san called Yuihan in order to discuss where she should room. She asked if she could share a room with Kitarie, and after Kitarie was asked if she was happy with that, it was agreed.
Once they returned to the 0048 housing, Kitarie helped the exhausted Yuihan to their now shared room, Yuihan had spent most of the journey practising the Center position for a number of songs, and collapsed immediately on her new bed, her things having been brought there before they returned to Akibastar. After letting her rest a minute Kitarie came over.
“How are you, Yuihan?”
“I’m fine, it’s been amazing, it’s like the best day of my life.”
Kitarie looked sad but tried to hide it.
“Do you know what would make it better Kitarie?” she said, before suddenly pulling Kitarie down onto her bed into a deep kiss. “Love me. Now.”
“Right here?”
Yuihan looked over to the door leading to their bathroom.
“No. In there.”
Kitarie kissed her once more, then went through to run the bath, before coming back and helping Yui undress. She then helped her through to the bathroom and lowered her in, then climbed in herself at the other end. Kitarie started to massage Yui’s legs, then brought herself up to Yui’s face, they kissed deeply, Kitarie broke it to kiss Yui again on the neck, and then her head went below the water.
**********************************
The next few years were the greatest Yuihan would ever know, she performed as the Center in every concert, and whenever they could she and Kitarie would go out together watching movies or eating, Yuihan even completed several restaurants spiciest dishes on the menu. And when the night came they would share themselves with eachother, sometimes in the bath, sometimes on the bed. But they would share the bath everyday, without fail.
*************************
Yuihan had been the Center Nova for several years, when she went with the rest of the Successors to perform on an unliberated world. A recently promoted member, Miichan the 5th, had been placed next to her in the formation for the last song. It was Flying Get, the song which had seen her brought to the top, and as she began the chorus she became vaguely aware of the fact that she was glowing. Next to her Miichan was also glowing, but in a colour like she had just before becoming Center Nova, and Yuihan realised it was her end. So she’d have to make it her best performance. She put in more energy to the dancing and the singing than she had for weeks, and then, as the song reached a climax she felt the light surround her, and saw it was doing the same to Miichan. she finished the routine, turned to look at Kitarie and smiled.
“Kitarie…”
And she was gone.
***************
Kitarie begged the staff to tell her what had happened to Yuihan, before returning to the room they shared.
She ran the bath and sat in it, whiling away the hours, remembering her love and the time spent in that bath. And she couldn’t help but cry as she sat there alone.
Yuihan, wherever she was could see her. And she was sorry, but she couldn’t reach Kitarie anymore.
“If I have one regret, it’s that we couldn’t share one more bath together.”
-
Entry #5
Title: It Started With a Message
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Yagami Kumi and Kimoto Kanon; Kuuminon
Word Count: 2462
It Started With a Message
It was supposed to be just a joke. A play wherein they will play as boyfriend-girlfriend. A fake relationship one might say. That this was just for fun. They said that it would be their practice when they finally have their own boyfriends to deal with.
It started with a message and ended in tears.
It started with a message..
It was their week long break from school. With nothing to do and no one to talk to, Kuumin was lounging on her couch when her phone went off signalling a message. Being the lazy bum that she is, she reached for her phone without taking her eyes off the tv. She fumbled a bit but eventually managed to get the device. “One New Message”, it read. Pushing the necessary buttons, she saw that the message came from none other than her kawaii schoolmate, Kimoto Kanon.
To: Kuumin
Ne, how are you doing? It’s been a while she we spoke with each other. I’m bored so go cheer me up~
~Non<3
Kuumin couldn’t stop the smile that broke out from her face. That was just so Kanon. The girl was cute but she was bossy. Anyways she was fun to talk with especially when they’re bored and needing some fun. Kuumin immediately opened a new message to reply to Kanon. She teased the younger girl and made jokes to alleviate their boredom. They exchanged a few more mails and that took up most of their afternoon. Boredom, overcome!
Xxxxxxx
Kanon was Kuumin’s kouhai when she was still in high school. Non was two years younger than Kuumin making it Non in her second year of high school while Kuumin in her fourth. They met each other when Kuumin’s best friend, Takayanagi Akane was befriending Matsui Jurina – Non’s bestfriend. The two was a lil awkward with each other at first when they were introduced. At first glance, Non would look like the shy one while Kuumin the outspoken one. But truth is, it was the other way around.
They became good friends as time went by. They discovered many things about each other and became each other’s close friends. They would spend their lunch time together and share their lunches too. Even though the kouhais were in another building, the senpais would always meet them by their tree just to eat lunch together. Afterschool, they would spend some time wandering around the school or going to the arcades or playing with each other. They would go home together too when they have time.
Time flew by and before they know it, graduation was upon them. On the very day, almost all other graduates was crying their eyes out aside from this group of four. They didn’t cry. Didn’t even frown or gave a sad smile. They knew they would still meet each other and nothing will change.
Xxxxxxxxxx
Kuumin was still mailing Non when they got to the most interesting topic so far. They were both joking around and talking about how both of them have no boyfriend yet. Kuumin joked that Non doesn’t have one since no one can stand the bossy Non. While Non said that no one can stand BakaKuumin. They traded a few more jibes with each other when Kuumin got the strangest idea. Kuumin – being the self-proclaimed genius that she is – suddenly asked Non if she wanted to be her girlfriend. Non, playing along had accepted immediately. And from that day onwards, they were “officially” a couple. They would send good morning texts to each other, goodnight before going to sleep and even exchange some sickeningly sweet messages.
It was supposed to be just a joke. A play wherein they will play as boyfriend-girlfriend. A fake relationship one might say. That this was just for fun. They said that it would be their practice when they finally have their own boyfriends to deal with. What they didn’t know was that with every message sent, with every sweet words, they were beginning to mean it just a bit more.
Xxxxx
It was a few months after they became a couple that they saw each other again. It was because they were so busy with school work that the only time they have was mailing each other. Kuumin was waiting in their favourite bookstore for her first ever date with Non. She was browsing some books when she saw Non walking towards her. Normally, when you’re meeting your girlfriend of almost three months you would run to her and hug her, right? Well, since the only interaction these two have are just mailing each other, they didn’t do it like normal couples. Kuumin waited til Non almost reached her and gave the younger girl a bashful smile. She looked at what Non was wearing and complimented her on it. It was a lil awkward since they didn’t know how to apply all those fantasies they have about a first date with each other.
Kuumin then lead Non to the movie theatre and strike up a conversation. Along the walk, the awkward tension was slowly dissipating. And after the movie, it was already gone. They were like when they were still in school, laughing and joking with each other on their way to the restaurant.
Kuumin thought that it was just like a normal get together with friends when they were still in school which both relieved and unsettled her. Aren’t they a couple already? Isn’t this supposed to be a date? So, isn’t it supposed to be like this but how come something seems to be missing? These thought plague Kuumin’s mind. Then with all the courage she can muster, she slowly reached out her hand and grabbed a hold of Non’s. Maybe this was what was missing. Why does it feel so.. so like a puzzle piece being put together? She was too embarrassed so she didn’t look at the younger girl and just continued walking, her face having had a full on blush. But if she did glance at Non, she would’ve seen the happy bashful smile that the younger girl was giving her.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx
The date was a successful one if Kuumin would say so. They had fun like old times. Sure, it might seemed like a normal get together but Kuumin never let go of Non’s hand throughout the date. Even when they reached the restaurant and began eating, she refuse to let go of Non’s hand. It almost resulted on a soaked Kuumin as she knocked the glass full of water on the table since she was having a difficult time eating with just one hand.
It might’ve been like a normal get together, a friendly outing but those outings never gave Kuumin these strange reactions. It never made Kuumin’s heart beat faster when Non was looking at her. When Non was smiling at her. It never made her heart skipped a beat when Non laugh because of something she said and it never made her want to kiss the younger girl so much.
With all these thought in mind, only one word escaped Kuumin’s lips. “Yabai..”
Xxxxxxx
A month has passed since their date. Kuumin was missing Kanon like crazy. She already began dealing with the fact that she might be falling in love with Non. Her panic didn’t involve things like they were both girls or that Non was too young. What was worrying Kuumin was the fact that maybe, just maybe, Non was still treating what they have as just a game.
Her phone gave a chirp signalling she have a message. Jumping like a ninja, Kuumin quickly grab her phone knowing who it was already.
To; Kuu-chan~
Come at my house this Friday, we’re gonna celebrate Jurina’s birthday and have a lil party~
<Non3
Kuumin then replied a hurried yes. She couldn’t stop the excitement flowing through her. Just mailing Non, talking to her this way was making her heart beat so fast. She couldn’t wait for Friday to come already so that she’ll be able to see Non again. Maybe this time, aside from holding hands, she can hug the girl all night!
Xxxxxxxx
The party was already in full swing. Kuumin arrived at Non’s house earlier than most to prepare for the party. It was just supposed to be the four of them but Non’s classmate and Jurina’s other friends have caught wind of this lil get together. So they made it a small party consisting of at most 15 people. The music was loud, the food was all laid out, there are drinks in everyone’s hands and everyone was having a good time. Kuumin was cuddling with Non on the couch when they Jurina shout Truth or Dare. Everyone immediately gathered around the birthday girl and formed a circle. The game was tame at first with everyone still getting a feel of each other. But after a few more drinks and a few more daring people, the game has progressed into dangerous territory. The dares ranged from dancing around in your underwear to making out with various people. Jurina even ordered Churi to be topless and give her a lap dance! As for the truth questions it became so personal that everyone knew almost the other’s deepest darkest secret. At least they trust everyone in the room to never reveal it to anyone else.
And then came Kuumin’s turn. Miraculously, it was actually the first time the bottle has pointed into her. But the one asking the question was Jurina which made Kuumin nervous. It was the kissing monster that started all of this madness afterall! After choosing truth, Kuumin saw Jurina’s evil smirk but when she looked at Jurina’s eyes, she was surprised to find the younger girl was looking at her seriously. Jurina glanced away from Kuumin and before Kuumin have the chance to look where the other glanced she was dropped the heavy question.
“So Kuumin.. what would you do if you found out that Non was cheating on you?” Jurina kept her smile but the seriousness in her eyes demanded that Kuumin answer her honestly. Kuumin then glanced at Non to laugh the question off and say that Non would never do that to her but when she did looked at the other girl, Non was biting her lips and she was not looking at Kuumin. And that was when Kuumin realized that there may be some truth to this question. Kuumin then steeled herself and answered as honestly as she could. “If Non-chan have someone else, then I’ll let her choose who she wants to be with. It doesn’t matter if she don’t choose me as long as she’s happy” She cursed herself when she heard the crack on her voice.
After that, the atmosphere became heavy so Jurina distracted everyone and they ended the game there. Kuumin let go of Non’s hands and got up slowly. She went outside for some fresh air and to clear her mind.She knew there was truth in Jurina’s question but she never thought that Non would ever do that to her. “She might still think that this was just a fake relationship afterall” Kuumin mumbled to herself. She then gave a pained laugh and let herself fall to the ground. She stared at the starry night and let herself relax. It wouldn’t do if she start to cry now. But she knew, that after all this time, she was actually just waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Kuumin didn’t know how long she was outside. It must’ve been an hour or just a few minutes but then she heard footsteps approaching her. She already have an idea on who that might be so she just stayed in her position – lying on the ground with her right arm covering her face.
“You’ll get sick if you sleep here” she heard Non say as the younger girl stroked her hair. She couldn’t stop the warm feeling from spreading through out her body when she felt Non’s touch. Kuumin then took her arm off her face and looked at the sky. She still can’t face Kanon after what she had been asked and she was afraid that if she did, she might just start crying her eyes out. So with a soft and hoarse voice Kuumin asked “Is it true?”
She felt so vulnerable at that time. She was laying her heart on the line and she knew it. Kuumin waited with baited breath for Non’s answer. But what she heard broke her heart. The soft ‘yes’ was all it took for Kuumin to turn away from Kanon. She didn’t get up, she didn’t think she can move after all this. But amidst her warring thought, she can still feel Kanon’s touch. She can still feel Kanon rubbing her back and soothing her. And Kuumin knew she should be angry, she should be yelling at Kanon right now. But all she felt was Non’s hands rubbing her back.
“I’m not finished yet Kuu-chan” she heard Non’s voice. She knew that no matter what, she knew that she the younger girl’s voice would always make her listen. “Yes, its true that I was cheating on you. But Kumi, I already have two boyfriends before you came along. I was just fooling around with them through mail and I have never even seen them. Still I kept them with me since at first I thought that being with you was just a joke. That this was all fake. But then after our date, no before that, I knew that I was falling for you. Your sweet words, your thoughtful actions and your ability to always cheer me up. Kuumin, I’ve already realized this after our date but I knew I’ve been attracted to you since before your graduation. And I just realized that I’m falling in love with you after our date. So the moment we went home, I broke things off with those other guys. I just have them for fun, and I know they could never compare to you. They may say the same sweet things but I never felt anything when they do. But when you were the one to say those words to me, my heart beats fast, it skips a beat. It always left me breathless Kuumin”
Kumi was shocked to say the least. She was actually ready to give up everything but hearing Non say those words, hearing the same things she wanted to say to Non, was just too much to Kuumin. All she could do was stare at the other girl’s profile and when it finally sunk in, she grabbed Non’s face and kissed the girl with all the love she can express in that one act. After the need for air became apparent, they broke the kiss. Kuumin looked at Non’s eyes and say in her most serious and intense voice, “I love you Kimoto Kanon”
-
Entry #6
Title: A Maiden's First Love
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Ohori Megumi, Kasai Tomomi; Tomomi/Megumi
Word Count: 1502
A Maiden's First Love
Dear Diary,
Mama spoke to my teacher the other day. He said I’ve been spacing out in class far too much these days, and that my marks are spiraling into the dirt. I thought that was a bit harsh, but I do have to admit I’m not doing as well as I used to… So mama got me this diary; she said that this book might help me focus my thoughts a bit. Honestly, I don’t really want to do this, but both of my parents promised not to read it, so I guess it’s okay. Might as well, could be worth it if it even helps my marks out just a little bit.
Anyway, I suppose it’s good that papa decided to let onee-sama tutor me a couple of weeks ago. Oh, onee-sama is what she wants me to call her in private… Ohori-san was one of mama’s students a long time ago, before mama became too busy for that. I remember her only a bit from when I was younger, but over the last little while or so we’ve really made a connection. She’s so kind and patient with me, even when I completely mess everything up- she just smiles and says “It’s okay, child,” and sits beside me until I get it.
I think I could talk to her about anything, even the stuff my parents can’t know, and she’d understand. I know she’s older than me and everything, but I think onee-sama is one of my best friends!
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
How do you kiss someone? Is it just something that happens instinctively or do you have to learn it?
Hm… I’ll have to ask Tomochin one of these days. Those lips look like they’ve seen some action.
…
Just kidding. Don’t tell her I said that.
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
Ah, it’s been long time since I last wrote. It’s only been two entries and I already sort of forgot about this thing.
Um, I can write secrets in here, right? Well, lately, I’ve been having these… thoughts. About onee-sama. Actually, I’ve been having them for a while… but they’ve grown a lot stronger over the last few weeks, and they’re getting harder and harder to ignore. I can’t stop thinking about her… Come to think of it, maybe that’s what’s been affecting my schoolwork, because when onee-sama is beside me, I don’t have a problem doing things right (after a couple of tries!). In class though, it’s like everything kind of fades out and I start imaging things about onee-sama- her flower-like scent, her eyes, her voice close to my ear…
Ahh! It’s all so confusing.
I was wondering, are these normal?
I’ll try to ask onee-sama without giving myself away.
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
I’m in my family’s garden. The flowers smell really nice out here, and there are a couple of butterflies fluttering about. I need the fresh air, anyway.
I couldn’t summon enough courage to ask onee-sama about my feelings last time. Even though she asked me what was wrong and if I was sick, I still couldn’t bring myself to spit it out. And when she touched my forehead to check my temperature, my thoughts got even more jumbled and even though I trust her and I want to talk, nothing would come out!
I tried to talk to Tomochin about it. We’ve been friends since childhood, so I thought she’d understand. I guess I didn’t explain myself very well though, because she gave me this weird look, almost… alarmed? I’m not really sure how to describe it. She didn’t say much in response, either. Maybe I shouldn’t tell her about such things anymore…
Writing that makes me want to cry a little.
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
I finally got up the courage to talk to onee-sama. But I didn’t need to say much. It was like she already knew what I was talking about right after I said my first sentence. But she still smiled and listened to me talk anyway. At the end, she did this small chuckle that made my stomach twist. She rested her head on her knuckles, looked me in the eyes, and said,
“It’s love.”
Her voice makes me want to melt into a puddle. I wasn’t able to pay attention at all after that, so we called it a day. I don’t think she realizes it was her. She can’t have… can she? Diary, I’ve never been in love before, but what she said… it kind of matches up with what I’ve read in books, and what everyone tells me love is like.
But… onee-sama is a woman… and my tutor, at that! Mama and papa would never approve.
Oh no… Diary, what should I do?
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
How do you tell someone that you love them? My grades still aren’t getting any better, and I think it’s onee-sama’s right. I don’t know how it’s possible, but I think I’ve fallen in love with her. I saw this happening once in a book, but mama took it away from me before I could finish it, because she said it would “taint my mind” or something like that. I wish I’d read it faster! I could really use some kind of guide right now…
So if I tell her, will my life go back to normal? Or will it get even crazier?
I really want to be with her, Diary. I’ve been taught that a relationship like this will never work out, but maybe they’re all wrong. I want to think that they’re all wrong.
Ever since she said that word, my heart has been aching for her. I have to do something.
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
I don’t have too much time to write today. Onee-sama is coming over, and I think I’m going to tell her how I feel today. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but today I’ll either have to force myself to move on, or… or something insane will happen.
Wish me luck!
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
I’m floating.
♥
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
When the person you love returns your feelings, everything feels perfect. What onee-sama and I have… it can’t possibly be wrong!
Here’s another secret: I want to marry her one day. But maybe that’s being a bit greedy… for now, I’m satisfied with what we have.
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
Something terrible happened. Mama broke her promise and read my diary. Papa was livid; he yelled at me and I thought that he might hurt me. I don’t understand what’s so wrong about this.
I feel so lost.
Onee-sama is forbidden to see me anymore and papa locked me in my room. Outside, I can hear terrifying things- they’re screaming at her over the phone, and I can’t do anything about it. They called us disgusting… My own parents! They’re treating our love like a scandal! I’m getting out, and I know just how I’m going to do it. I can’t write it here, though. If mama and papa find out, then I won’t be able to escape again if I need to.
Mama, papa, I know you’re just trying to look out for me, but when you use words like “reeducation” and “sick”, what choice do I have? I’m sorry, but I can’t stay.
… maybe I’ll take this book with me after all.
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Dear Diary,
Onee-sama said she was going to step out just for a few minutes, so she left me in her room. I guess I have time to write in this thing a little bit before she comes back…?
Her home is beautiful. I though my house was big, but hers in on another level entirely. The first thing I saw when I got here was a huge flower garden, full of butterflies. Well, onee-sama said a lot of them were asleep, but maybe I scared them when I walked in, because there were still a few about in the air.
Onee-sama’s embrace is nice.
I don’t think I can stay here long, though. I don’t want to leave, but she will be in danger if I stay. I can’t take any chances. First thing tomorrow, I’ll leave, maybe even before she wakes up.
Onee-sama said she’ll teach me something special when she comes back. But what could she be teaching me at a time like this?
I think I hear her now.
Chiyuu,
Tomo
-
Double update! Sorry for the slow update this time here in the forum :(
Entry #7
Title: Messed Up
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Matsui Jurina, Takayanagi Akane; ChuriJuri
Word Count: 1886
Messed Up
“I said I love you but I never said you have to love me back”
Matsui Jurina and Takayanagi Akane are childhood friends. They’ve known each other since they were little and you know all those cliché stories about childhood friends? Yup, they were exactly those.
The two of them was walking on their way home. Normally, their walks would be filled with stories, gossip, chattering and most of all, laughter. There was never a dull moment when in close proximity with these two. And the keyword there being ‘normally’. Its been a few weeks already when Akane also known as Churi have noticed Jurina’s strange behaviour. The girl was being silent when most of the time she wouldn’t even shut up. Churi tried asking Jurina what was wrong but all she received was a forced smile and the words “daijoubou” most of the time. She was seriously starting to worry about the younger girl. They would normally talk about everything bothering the both of them whether it be something as simple as a broken pencil or something more serious. This was actually the first time Jurina have kept something from Churi this long. Churi didn’t want to pressure the other girl but if she didn’t know it soon, she might just have to force the girl to tell it to her.
She was so engrossed in her mental debate when she was startled and dragged by a running Jurina. Churi can’t see the other girl’s face and didn’t know where they were going but she just run along. After a few minutes of running, an out of breath Churi and a barely breathing heavily Jurina stopped in front of a swing. Churi went to glare at the other girl’s lack of heavy breathing but when she finally looked up – being bent over from trying to catch her breath – she saw that they’re actually in ‘their’ park. It was the park where they met for the first time. The park where Jurina, little Jurina saved Churi from those big bully kids. They park was the same as always with sandboxes all over, full of trees, a slide and their favourite – the swings.
Churi looked over at Jurina and found the girl head bowed and sitting on the swing. Churi then went behind the girl, took hold of the chains and gently pushed the younger girl. Churi knew there must be something important Jurina wanted to tell her since they went here in this specific park. Maybe she’ll tell me what it was that was bothering her so much. Churi thought to herself and couldn’t hide the smile that broke out from her when she thought she’ll finally be able to help her younger friend out. They stayed that way for a few more minutes until Jurina finally stood up from her swing. The younger girl faced Churi and Akane can see the intensity of those eyes boring into hers. Churi looked equally and directly to Jurina’s eyes, conveying and encouraging the other girl to say what was on her mind. Churi can see the frustration and well-hidden fear in those eyes. What those were for, she have no idea but she waited silently and patiently. But what she heard just left Churi speechless and thrown for a loop.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
It’s been days since that fateful day on the park and everything was almost back to normal. Jurina was as energetic as ever, as clingy as ever and as affectionate as ever. What was different was the way the younger girl wouldn’t hold her as tightly when she would hug Churi or the way the hug didn’t last as long. Also the fact that Churi would involuntarily stiffen when she felt those arms around her.
Churi could still remember Jurina’s words from the park. The fact that the younger girl was so ready to cry as she just stayed silent after Jurina uttered those words. That confession. Churi didn’t know what to do so she just stood there dumbfounded. Jurina„ realizing that she wouldn’t get anything out of Churi anymore, just laughed it off and said to just forget about it. But Churi can’t. Her freaking bestfriend was in love with her! She didn’t know what to do. Sure, she loved the younger girl as her bestfriend and as her lil sister but she didn’t know whether she could love the other as more than that. And that was what was eating at her. Every day she could see Jurina looking longingly at her but when she tried to turn her head, Jurina would quickly look away. It was like they were playing a game of cat and mouse.
Churi haven’t realized this but Jurina has been overthinking everything lately. She could see that she was making Churi uncomfortable. She knew that their friendship had changed so she acted like nothing happened and that she didn’t confess. But she saw that Churi just wouldn’t let it go and it was changing their dynamic. Also, it hurts the younger girl everytime she’ll hug the girl and felt her stiffen. It was almost a rejection in itself. So she decided to fix this once and for all.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The bell just rung and everyone started gathering their things. Churi was just about done packing her things when she noticed a little puppy or rather Jurina propped up on her desk, giving her puppy dog eyes. Jurina looked so cute so Churi ruffled her head and gave her a warm smile. But then Jurina stood up and gestured to Churi that she wanted to talk. The playful aura surrounding them instantly vanished and replaced by a foreboding aura. Churi finished packing her things and followed Jurina outside. Jurina led the older girl on their tree – yes, they have a habit of claiming things as their own. Once they reach their tree, Jurina turned to the older girl and grabbed her hand. It was so gentle, so strong yet feminine that it just made Churi’s heart beat that faster. Made her heart almost skipped a beat. It was strange reactions and she didn’t get those feelings whenever they hold hands normally.
Jurina swung their hands together. It was actually cute how the younger girl was acting. But the words that left her mouth was something that Akane never wanted to hear.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
“I know I’m making you uncomfortable by being this close… I also know because of the confession thing. I think I just wanted to let you know about how I felt.. Don’t worry Churi, I’m not expecting anything, just that I hope our friendship wouldn’t be broken by this.. But if you need time for yourself or time away from me, I totally understand” Jurina said while shooting glances at Churi. The younger girl couldn’t keep her eyes connected longer to the older girl. She didn’t like this idea – even though she’s the one that was suggesting it now. But if it would make Churi feel better or make their friendship go back to the way it was, then she would gladly do it.
Jurina’s thoughts was interrupted when she felt pain in her cheeks. Churi was pinching her cheeks so hard that she tears was forming in her eyes. Churi’s face was as stern as ever and she was in her scolding mode. “Bakayaro Jurina! You think I can stand a day without your annoying presence?! Sure, I know that our friendship isn’t like it was before but it’s partly my fault too! So don’t go blaming this all in you!”
Churi never wanted to let go of their friendship. It was so important to the both of them that they were willing to overcome this. Sure, she feel uncomfortable but who wouldn’t? She just need to deal with this.
“You know, I know I said I love you but I never said that you have to love me too” Churi’s heart almost broke from that. Here Jurina was laying her heart out again only to be met by silence. Churi really didn’t know what to do about it. Sure, she accepts the girl’s feeling but what she can’t do was how to return it. “Jurina-chan, I accept your feelings. I know you mean them but I don’t know if I can return it. I don’t want to get your hopes up you know. I don’t want to hurt you. You’re too important to me.” Churi said, tears also gathering in her eyes. “Jurina, I’m not rejecting you, just please understand that I’d rather choose something that I know will last longer, okay?” Churi then hugged Jurina. She could feel the girl shaking with her sobs. It hurt Churi that she was part of the reason why Jurina was crying right now. A few minutes passed and Jurina’s sobs had turned to sniffles. The younger girl had calmed down considerably.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The sun was now out and the sky was littered with stars. The two friends was lying on their backs, cuddling with each other. Jurina was holding Akane’s hand tighly, never wanting to let go. She knew she got rejected. It hurt, yes, but she understood what Churi said. She may be stubborn and persistent but with this matter, being that just wouldn’t solve anything.
Akane looked at Jurina’s eyes when the girl turned to face her. She just wanted to reassure Jurina that after this ordeal that they were okay. That nothing would change. That will go back to the way they were before. She tried conveying what she really felt and unbeknownst to her, she leaning closer to the younger girl. She could feel Jurina’s breath on her face, she could feel her heart beat faster and faster, until it almost stop when she felt soft lips against her own. Akane’s breath hitched and she unconsciously closed her eyes. The kiss was gentle, overly innocent and not like how she imagined it to be. She never saw fireworks, she saw the the big bang! She never felt the butterflies in her stomach, she felt dragons raging. Is this how a kiss should feel like? Churi have no idea but all she knew was that she felt more from that kiss than anywhere else.
It was wrong, Churi knew that. She already rejected the younger girl but with that kiss she was already second guessing herself. She was blushing so bad all she could do was burry her head in Jurina’s neck. Meanwhile Jurina was shell shocked but she couldn’t stop the grin from overcoming her face. It may be a simple kiss but what a kiss it was! She also couldn’t stop the happy feeling that flows through her that all she could was laugh out loud! Churi was hitting her already from laughing so much. She hugged the older girl and never let go. It was getting so late that they decided to stop fooling around. Churi was the first to get up, her face still red from what happened. She offered her hands to the younger girl and Jurina took it, grin still in place. “So.. that was some kiss, ne?” Jurina then dashed away from Churi laughing her heart out. Churi just shook her head and let out a giggle . She knew they were going to be okay. She knew that nothing will ever change.. well, maybe, she might fall in love with the puppy too!
-
Entry #8
Title: Truth
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Sasaki Yukari
Word Count: 2466
Truth
This was what kenkyuusei Sasaki Yukari was anxious to find. Up until now she had never noticed anything wrong with the way the group was run, in fact she enjoyed it. Yet it seemed to her that many of the same people that she had auditioned with were suddenly becoming vastly different. It wasn’t in a bad way, their changes had allowed for them to become promoted ahead of her as their skills improved and personality shined. She actually felt proud of them even though they were allowed to shine on the stage as a promoted member and she was not.
The thing that was truly nagging Yukari was the fact that it was soon becoming everyone but her. It was as if not long after their changes they were promoted and this itself was weird. She wondered exactly why it was that so many of them were changing so drastically or even the fact that so many of them had become different.
She was still friends with them but it felt like some sort of thing holding them back now. Occasionally they would be forgetful of things that she thought they would never forget. They seemed to only include her because they had to rather than because they wanted to. They tried to act normal but it wasn’t only Yukari that sensed the difference, the others did too.
Everything was different.
This scared her- their changes, and this group.
Yukari started looking into things in an attempt to figure something out. In an desperate attempt to find out where those people that she had once been close friends with had disappeared to. It was through Maeda’s vague words that an idea had started budding inside of her.
Those weren’t the same people that she had befriended.
It was illogical but after having been close to the senbatsu members during the time when she was arranged to play the role of Eguchi Aimi she could hear them talk. She could hear their worries about being the next one to go. That if they were to even speak out they wouldn’t just lose their position, but something far more important.
Yet when Yukari tried to ask around she got no help, just warnings. She wasn’t to touch upon such a subject if she wanted to stay in the group.
Yukari was okay with everything until Nattsun told her that she had been seen things when she had been following one of the girls when they were called down by the staff members. The next day she was gone, they said that she had been sick. When she came back, she was different too.
It was not long after that they brought back the kenkyuusei selections.
Mutou
Mitsumune
Oshima
Yukari ticked off their names in her notebook, they had been acting funny and she was sure that they were goners. Many of the members had been looking at Yukari differently and she had noticed. Someone had noticed that she realized something was going on. Fear filled her and she could only plan some way to get out of whatever she had gotten herself into.
“The only way to live is to fail.” were the words that Acchan had whispered once when walking by her. Yukari mused upon these words, and what she thought were random gibberish that the older members had been telling her.
“Stop looking, you will lose.”
“They’re gone.”
“Quit playing detective”
“Escape is the only hope.”
“I’ll miss you.”
Whatever it was that the others were warning her about it was dangerous. If she was right about what Acchan meant, she was to fail the kenkyuusei selection or she would be gone. This gone was different though, Acchan had said live and Yukari was worried that her curiosity over all of this world lead to her own demise. She couldn’t do it though; she couldn’t just fail the selections. Not after all the hard work and sacrifices that she had made in order to get into this group.
Yukari would just have to face the consequences, whatever they may be.
The list of names for those that had not passed the selections was announced, all of them from the 13th generation.
Yukari took a sigh of relief only to have the fear come back to her.
“I hope you made the right choice.” this time it was Yuko that had told her that.
Are you really ready to learn the last truth of your life?
It was a message from a foreign number.
Yukari stared at it for a while before her curiousity got the best of her and she replied to that mail.
Yukari was scared, but she knew that she couldn’t turn back now.
She was in the basement on the Don Quixote, 10 floors beneath her usual stage. What scared her was the fact that this was something you would expect in a movie, secret basement. Who knows what could be in the dark room in front of her, well she definitely didn’t.
“Welcome my child. I see you have decided to take up my invitation.” A voice from behind told her.
“Who are you?” Yukari asked out to the person who had sent her that mail. “I am nobody yet I am also everyone. I have promised to show you the truth you so desperately seek in exchange for your life.” The voice told the shocked Yukari before shutting the doors behind her. “M-my life?!” Yukari shouted. “I’m sure you have heard the others talk about it. Such a pity that you’re so curious. I was going to spare you.” The voice sighed out before flickering on some lights.
In front of Yukari were dozens of bodies…
Of the members.
Yukari was shocked at what one would describe as “out of a movie.”
Rows upon rows of glowing green containers holding the members. Ryoka, Nattsun, Mayu, Yukirin, Sasshi… She had seen all of these people reccently. Yet why were they in the containers before her.
Yukari’s curiousity no longer overpowered her will to live. She bolted for the door only to realize that it had been locked shut by the cloaked figure beside her. “Let me go!” Yukari pleaded, but the figure would hear none of that. She simply walked alongst the containers, beckoning Yukari to follow her.
“Already too late for you child. He will never set you free now that you know about this.” The figure told her.
Yukari was speechless and she knew that there probably wasn’t a chance for her anymore. She had chosen this and she was to blame for her own ending.
“Tell me the truth.” Yukari told her, at least she would die satisfying this curiousity of hers. The figure spoke as she paced forward now that Yukari had chosen to follow her into the unknown. “I see that you have chosen, then follow me I’ll show you what you seek.”
Yukari followed the figure in between the omnimous tubes containing people that were once her friends.
“Yes, those are the very people that you might have known. Or better yet you’ve never known them in the first place.” the figure said, gesturing to the various tubes that surrounded them. Many of the figures very familiar to Yukari or that was what she thought.
“Never known them?” Yukari asked confused, she was sure that she knew those members. Maybe she wasn’t close to them but she was sure that they were the very people that she had to perform with. They were her senpais and occaisionally they would give her advice.
“You see those members?” The figure pointed towards the tubes containing the 7th gens, well merely half the 7th gens.
Maeda Ami, Komori Mika, Sato Sumire, Iwasa Misaki.
“Know what’s common about them? Why the other members of their generation aren’t there?”
Yukari looked at her with a confused face.
“Management tried to push them at one point. Their pushes however failed.” The figure tried to explain to the confused girl. She was used to this, having done this dozens of times. Now that Yukari thought about it, they had all fallen in ranks this year at the election with the exception of Wasamin.
“So you entrap them simply because they weren’t popular enough?! That’s horrible!’ Yukari shouted but the figure shook her head.
“Not because they failed. They were only pushed because they had already been taken in. The people you see in front here are the real them. Not the ones that you’ve been performing with, not the people that you think that you know. ” The figure tried to explain to Yukari, although she had done this many times before it seemed as if every single time they would be slow to accept such a truth.
“What happened to them?”
“They were like you; they sought the answer and gave up their life for it.”
“Then who are the ones that I know.” Yukari asked, scared of the multiple possibilities that were coming into her mind. She never knew any of them, those that she had known were not them…
‘Replacements, they considered taking their bodies but instead developed a clone of them. The bodies just stay here until the day when the clones die, graduation? That just means that they’re free. No longer needed for the advancement of this group. It was only a matter of time for you too.” The figure said before it unvealed the tube behind her. A replica of Yukari was inside that exact tube.
Yukari stared in amazement at the body inside.
“She’ll be taking over your spot soon. You should be glad that they scraped the taking over your body part. Maybe in a couple years you’ll be out and about too.”
“…Doesn’t make it any better. Knowing that I’ll be living in a tube for a couple years. Why would they even do this, better yet who is they?”
“Too many questions child. Let me answer them one at a time. Listen carefully though.”
The figure lead Yukari further along into the maze of tubes, passing by many familiar faces.
“Everything started with Acchan. God old Acchan was the first one to be pushed wasn’t she? The plan, this plan had been hatched long before the formation of the group. It was with the birth of the frail Akimoto Aimi, Akimoto Yasushi’s only child.”
“Akimoto Aimi?”
“You see with the failure of Onyanko Club, Akimoto Yasushi had pursued his other interests… science. He messed with what shouldn’t be messed with, his own child. Little young Aimi had been born with a weak body and wasn’t going to live so Akimoto tried his best to save his only child…”
“Right out of some sort of movie…”
“He however did not anticipate for his child to be turned into such a demon. Everything had been fine, Aimi was growing stronger. It was already too late when they realized that Aimi had gained powers and not just the gift of taking over minds. They entrapped Aimi hoping to reverse everything but it was already too late. Unless Aimi split herself she wouldn’t be able to live or rather nobody would be able to live. That’s when the Akihabara Project was hatched. AKB48 is merely a place for Aimi to thrive.”
“We’re all sacrifices for Akimoto’s child…”
“Yes. As long as Aimi can split her multiple personalities she does not risk going insane and destroying half the city. The more of her personalities that Aimi keeps, the more dangerous and unstable she is.”
“Wait… just what did they do to Aimi?
“Oh just a little nuclear radiation, some human experimentation, oh and I don’t think replacing her weakening heart with a super battery helped much either.”
“…”
“Now what else was there…”
“The older members know about this don’t they… why are they still alive then?”
“Akimoto grew too fond of them by the time the first experiment was set into place. Oh you know her too, Maeda Atsuko she was the first one.”
“Acchan? But she was the one that warned me about this…”
“She was the failed experiment, the reason why they use clones now. Acchan proved a little too much for Aimi, her mind control was not yet perfect and eventually Acchan broke free.”
“This is why all the older members know about it…”
“They’re sworn to secrecy though, some of the members couldn’t take it anymore and left the group. Some of them had such potential too… I’m sure Aimi would have enjoyed playing with them. ” The figure paused before continuing, “They still try to spoil his plans, it’s rather entertaining to watch them try even though they know their career is at stake. Some of them still try to protect those that they love.”
Yukari didn’t know what exactly it was that Aimi spoke of, but she had heard the rumors of the so called forbidden relationships in the group. She didn’t know if it was about that but she wasn’t interested. To Yukari the forbidden relationships paled in comparision to the greater conspiracy that laid behind this group. She scoffed to herself thinking, ‘Who would’ve thought that the biggest girl group in the history of Japan was merely a sacrifice for a child that should’ve died. A mere playground for such an abornormal child.”
“This group is scary…” Yukari threw out offhandedly even though her fear had long been diminished with it some sort of acceptance to her fate bloomed.
“You just realized? Half the people in this group are actually the same person…”
“Why hasn’t anybody tried to stop them… there’s really no hope is there?”
“No, unless you’re willing to be some stupid movie hero and risk the city of Tokyo.”
“…”
“There’s nothing much to tell now, are you ready to face your doom?” The figure asked as she lead Yukari back to the empty tube next to her clone. “One more question, who are you? Why would you be helping Akimoto and them?” Yukari asked before stepping into the tube.
The figure closed the entrance to the tube before taking off her hood and pressing the button next to the tube allowing for the green liquid to fill the tube
Yukari stared in shock at the looks of the figure, she looked exactly like Eguchi Aimi!
“Because I am Aimi.”
Sometimes things aren’t as they seem.
Don’t join AKB48.
Even if you do.
Don’t be curious.
Don’t seek her out.
You could be next.
-
Wow, nice work.
Gambatte ne, minna-san :3
Wish all the best for the competitors.
-
Entry #9
Title: Kasuka na Kaori
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takayagi Akane, Matsui Jurina; ChuriJuri.
Word Count: 1264
Kasuka na Kaori
Did you noticed my secret love,
Just like a gently fragrance?
Churi was singing the chorus of the song, when she waited patiently for someone in the Disney World entry, she could not help but remember of the girl that she was waiting when she hear that song. She didn’t know why exactly that music remember so much the girl that she was waiting and why she loved so much that song. – Maybe because the song is so sweet like her? The older girl thought.
- CHURI!! Sorry for be late!
Jurina come running in her direction with a big smile in her face, when the young girl reached Churi she stopped and took a breath.
- It’s okay Jurina, I come some minutes early.
The young girl face was taken by an expression of relief when she heard he older one answer, the young girl was really worried about being late for they date. Churi cannot help but smile seeing that, even that Jurina was always busy with her two positions as an AKB and SKE member and the high school, the young girl was always try to spend some of her free time with Churi.
I was always looking for the reason of why can we be together.
After take her breath Jurina smiled and took Churi hand when they started to walk in the direction of the park. Initially they have a little problem with the roller coaster and the scary house because of Jurina but after this all went well. Seeing the young girl having fun and smiling make Churi heart beat more fast, even the little things about the young girl, like she have fear of scary houses, make the older girl want be by her side more and protect her.
While I keep learning about the things you like,
This feeling as well kept growing.
After play in a shooting game and Jurina win a bear plush to Churi, they decided to take some ice cream, after they sit in a bench, the girls start to chatting and enjoy the ice cream, Churi still was impressed how Jurina was able to get the most huge bear to her, and Jurina start to acting in her cool and flirt way, like always. She was used to spoil the young girl, always accepting her hugs and kisses, letting her sleep in the same bed with her when the girl asked, she was so used that when she was not doing that she feel that something was missing. A sad smile come to her face when she remembered that now they time together decreasing because of Jurina be always busy holding her new position in the team K.
The time we are together always flies by
And my way back home the time passes too slow
And I made the habit of grasp my cell phone tightly
To always notice your mails
- Churi are you okay? Asked Jurina worried about the sad expression of the older girl. Churi realizing that she was making Jurina be worried make her best to fake a happy smile when she answered her.
- I’m okay, I was just thinking if I put food for my birds, but is alright. I have certain that I did this.
She laughed and Jurina sighed.
- Please don’t make me be worried again, we now have so little time to pass together, I was worried that you was not enjoying…
- Eh?! Why I should not be enjoying?
- Well…I notice that have been some days that you are acting a little awkward when we are together…
Churi became surprise with Jurina said.
Did you noticed my secret love,
Just like a gently fragrance?
She knows that she have been acting a little awkward with Jurina but she cannot help, when they was together she can’t focus in anything but the young girl, her smile, her voice. Was hard to her hold her urges in hug and kiss the girl, or try to hide her jealous when she see Jurina kissing treating other member in a flirt way. Took some time until she was able to think in something to said to the girl.
- Is nothing Jurina, I love when we spend some time together the only thing that bothers me is that we don’t have much more time to do this…
- Ah! I Understand…
Jurina stared the floor, she was sad because was not able to pass much time with Churi too but was nothing that she was able to do about this.
Churi start to feel guilty to change the happy atmosphere of some minutes before, without think she kissed Jurina’s cheek, the unexpected action of the older girl make Jurina blush and smile.
- Let’s go Jurina! We still have some time to play.
The young smiled to Churi and took her hand and guide her to some attraction that she wanted to see.
The time we are together always flies by
And my way back home the time passes too slow.
Before the two girls notice the day was ending, they saw the sunset together and then after Jurina insist, she and Churi was going to the older girl house. Churi sighed,even that she said that Jurina don’t need to leave her in her house, the girl was so stubborn that Churi didn’t saw other choice. They was walking holding hands in silence, just enjoying each other company. When she was with Jurina like that she always remember why she love that song, the song was sweet like the young girl, that song said how she feel about Jurina, she has fall in love with the young girl.
I can only tell I like you in a nonchalant way but
I really want to know your feelings but I am scared
And I can only talk about the usual things.
When they finally reach the door of her house both of them smiled, they still was holding hands but for some reason they don’t wanted to release each other hand.
- Is late I should go.
Said Jurina.
- Yeah… You’re right.
I can only tell I like you in a nonchalant way but
I really want to know your feelings but I am scared
And I can only talk about the usual things.
- Jurina…
- What?
- Nothing, just take care when you go to your house, t-thanks for today and g-good night!
Churi released Jurina’s hand really fast and opened her door but before she be able to enter in her house she feel someone grabbing her arm and pushing her.
Did you noticed my secret love, Just like a gently fragrance?
When she turned to the young girl she saw Jurina smiling, the young girl without saying nothing kissed her, a gently and sweet kiss, when she break it the kiss she said to Churi.
- You awful liar, if you was in love with me why did you not said before?
Jurina sighed, Churi still did not believe in what was happen.
- I have to go now but we will talk later ok?
Churi nodded with her head confirming, after saw the girl answer Jurina smiled said goodbye and leave her alone.
Did you noticed my secret love, Just like a gently fragrance?
The older girl smiled, just like in the song Jurina noticed her love, and better than this, now she know that the girl feel the same for her.
-
Entry #10
Title: My Little Angel
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Sashihara Rino, Murashige Anna
Word Count: 1896
My Little Angel
How long has it been?
It feels like it all happened yesterday; perhaps it did. It was like something out of a ridiculous video game. It’s always the government, you know? In the movies, in the books, in the video games and the comics it’s always the government’s fault. Apparently this applies in real life too. When we were recruited we were thoroughly briefed on the situation. At least they had the decency to look ashamed.
They were attempting to make a some sort of chemical that betters the human body. They wanted stronger soldiers, soldiers who were fast and soldiers with better vision and hearing. Most importantly, they wanted soldiers who didn’t feel pain. The drug was supposed to work so that even if a soldier lost an arm or a leg they could fight on. At least that is my understanding.
Of course this back fired on them, something about abnormalities I didn’t bother understanding the chemistry jargon, at any rate when the vial was injected into the test subject, he went into cardiac arrest and passed on. The scientists were confused but before they could even get the poor young man to the morgue he woke up and began to tear at their bodies, gnawing on their flesh, the security footage they showed us was horrid. Even more so when the five mutilated bodies started moving again.
This happened to other test subjects as well and before anybody knew the virus had spread to the surface, labs in Japan, the U.S, England and South Africa were practically overrun by zombies. Evacuation plans were executed and cities were closed off. Once the contamination was contained the remaining scientists worked on a cure whilst the government planned on how to get survivors out of the cities. That’s where Akimoto Yasushi, a scientist and survivor of the attack on the facility in Tokyo, came in. The subject he was working on was immune to effects of the virus.
Maeda Atsuko
The reason for her immunity had something to do with some sort of biological jargon that I tuned out. The point was, the governments began recruiting people just like Maeda. They called us ‘The Chosen’ because of how ‘unique’ we were apparently. It was compulsory for us to join The Chosen, you could not say no. You were serving your country, they’d tell you, you’ll be a beacon of hope. So we were trained until deemed ready for combat. We were then deployed to different sectors, to recover survivors, take back cities or recover lost data from old labs.
I personally felt no satisfaction in this, as I had no family to make proud.
But I digress.
I was in the first group of recruits, Maeda was appointed our commanding officer. The girl was quiet and she did not look like much of a leader but she gave her God damned best. Two years later we’ve hardly made a dent in reclaiming our cities. Some of the infected have even evolved or mutated. Some were abnormally large and just as strong, others were agile and could leap buildings. There is talk of others that scream so loudly your head could pop off if exposed long enough and others that are coated in deadly acid. It was, for lack of a better term, fucked up and it was making our mission a great amount harder.
Six months ago, my superiors thought I was ready to lead my own squad of twenty troops. We had a good track record. Two successful reconnaissance missions and three successful extractions. I grew close to my squad, they were family almost. We’d have nights where talked of memories before this insanity started, we would sing songs and dance like silly fools if only to forget the horrors we will have to face the next day. One particular young girl had snuggled her way into my heart.
“Reporting for duty ma’am!”
She was the youngest member of our squad, at only fourteen years of age, she was special and cute as a button. She was my hope for a brighter future. Her enthusiasm was so inspiring she was probably the reason why I had not taken my own gun to my head. She had the rest of the squad in stitches and even made the toughest of our squad smile. Her smile could light up a galaxy. She had odd sort of outlook on life for someone in her situation, it was sort of refreshing.
“If life gives you lemons then smile and kick life in the face!”
Then it happened.
The higher-ups wanted the facility in Tokyo back. My own squad and two others were assigned to this mission. The objective was simple; go in, kill all the zombies in the surrounding area, secure any survivors and secure the area around the facility. We were to leave in a few days, after the proper briefing was done. This was the biggest operation we’ve ever been a part of but we had confidence. The higher-ups seem to think there is something in the facility that can help our fight, we were not told what exactly but their usual ‘you are making your country proud’ pre-mission spiel was more passionate than all the others. Whatever that meant.
“We’ll be fine because we’re together.”
Ever cheerful was she.
But was she ever so wrong.
So very wrong.
It was almost as if those mother fuckers knew we were coming. Five of the massive new breed zombies had already taken out two our choppers and in the confusion our squads were separated. The horde swarmed on us and it was by pure luck that eleven of us found each other. I made sure my little one was by my side the entire time. The chaos served as good cover as we ran off, far from the horde and found an abandoned house. We took refuge in there and barricaded all entry-ways. We could still hear faint noises of the horde outside, a few screams of terror and gun-shots, she was frightened of course, she had battle experience but nothing had prepared her, or any of us for that matter, for this.
It was after what felt like hours that sounds stopped. We heard the groaning and roaring the roaring of the horde become even more faint until it was quiet save for a few groans of the stragglers left in this area. It was decided that we would scout the area the next morning. No one spoke that night, and the little one sobbed and trembled in my arms and I could do nothing but hold her tighter and whisper words of comfort into her hair.
The next day the situation did not get better.
We had been abandoned.
We had returned to the crash site and found the communications system was still functioning, we informed Headquarters of the situation. Their response had angered all us. We were ordered to ‘hold out until reinforcement arrived’. That was weeks ago. Fortunately we had found an underground army base during one of our day time patrols. It was a bit beat down but there were beds, rations and armaments enough to last us months. The convenience of it’s discovery was almost painful. It reminded us that we were probably going to die here and that in a sick twisted way, God wanted us to be comfortable before we died but she tried so hard to cheer us up.
“Never look a gift horse in the mouth, guys!”
Stupid little cheerful girl.
She was so young.
Too young.
It was supposed to be a simple patrol. I think it had been two months since we were told to ‘wait for reinforcements’ and we normally patrol the town in the daytime, looking for a way out of this hell hole.
We were walking down an abandoned road, then we heard the thundering foot stomps, she pushed me out the way just as the brute came charging in our direction, hitting her square in the chest and knocking her into a car across the street.
“Go to her! We’ll handle this bastard!”
I ran to where she landed, careful not to aggravate any of her injuries. My God she was a mess; blood running down the side of face, her breathing shallow, left leg was sprawled in an awkward angle, various parts of her body riddled with scratches. Her half lidded eyes look up and she attempts to grin at me. The realization that this was my fault, that she did this for me, the guilt and pain hit me just as hard as the brute hit her.
“Why are you crying?”
Her voice, once high and energetic, was now raspy and faint. I told her to save her energy, I told her we’d get help for her. By now the brute had been taken care of and the others had gathered around us. I looked up to the only person who knew basic medicine; Minegishi seeing my pleading gaze, shakily pokes and prods her body, my eyes were on her face the entire time. Her features still churubic ut marred by the gash that where the blood came from. Her breathing was becoming slower and her eyes were beginning to glaze over. Minegishi finishes her prodding with a shake of her head.
There was nothing we could do.
“I’m glad you’re okay Sasshi but I’m so tired.”
I begged her not to close her eyes. The others joining in my pleas.
“You guys need to stop crying.”
No. No. No! NO!
“Be strong for me, okay Sasshi?”
And as she took her last breath I heard a terrible sound, an inhumane wail of pain, I would later realize that it was my own. My comrades joined me in my mourning. For we had not only lost a friend but we had lost our hope. We had lost our driving force. We had lost our life.
And I had lost my soul.
My little angel was gone.
My reason for being was gone.
And it was my fault.
I am reduced to nothing but a shell.
We gave her as best a send off as we could. Her grave was near the base, so she could be close to us. The others, I see them when they think I don’t notice, they stare at me with such pity. They try to make me feel better, reassure me that it’ll be all okay. They tell me it wasn’t my fault. But their words are mere whispers compared to the voices. The voices tell me others things. They shout and scream words of hate and blame. I agree with the voices. I never fought the voices. They were right. My little angel would be alive right now if it were not for me.
“Sasshi?”
Bless you Miichan. Always coming to check on me.
But I’ve already made my decision.
“Sasshi why is the door locked?”
The pistol I had been holding feels lighter now.
“Sasshi!”
With a shaking hand I point the barrel to my temple.
“Ryu! Help me with this door!”
I’m sorry guys, I’m not strong enough without her.
I pull the trigger just as the door is busted open.
“COMMANDER!”
I never liked that title.
Wait for me my little angel.
I’m on my way.
I’m coming, Murashige Anna.
-
A PACK OF TRUMP CARDS !? I really want it! I will try with my 1st time writing fanfic!! But with those entries... Its hard for me... QAO
-
@kokoiscute: Trying won't hurt! Deadline is October 1st, there is still time if you finally decide to participate :thumbup
Again, sorry for the slightly late update here. Prepare yourselves for a long read!
Entry #11
Title: Yesterday’s Road To Eternity
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Itano Tomomi, Kasai Tomomi; TomoTomo
Word Count: 10981
Yesterday’s Road To Eternity
The room is white, plain and sterile. With barely any decorations or furniture, it is a simple and depressing room. Even with my deteriorated sense of smell, I can detect the strong scent of disinfectant and sickness. You would think that a hospital would make their rooms more… welcoming.
But then again, I guess a hospital isn’t the happiest place on Earth. They wouldn’t particularly be sending the right message if they paint their white walls pink, change their beige duvets to flower patterned covers and squirt apple perfume around the wards. A hospital is indeed not a happy place.
At least, not for me.
- - - - - - - - - -
I stare at the large ventilator in the corner, with all the wires connecting to the sleeping body, the only feature to the room that made it seem less miserable. Indeed, the beeping machine made the room become rather futuristic. Taking my gaze away from the constantly pumping machine, I focus on the tiny body, her porcelain skin almost transparent as the fluorescent lights shine down on us. Able to easily see her pale blue veins and with all the tubes intertwined with her system, she almost looks like a cyborg. A perfectly preserved being that could last forever; that just needed to be recharged. And after her batteries reached 100%, she would jump back to life, letting us return to our daily lives.
However, I know that this isn’t true. She isn’t a robot that can live for eternity. She is just human. And all humans have an expiry date.
Nothing can bring Tomomi back to life.
-
I sit quietly as the doctor explains your current condition. Hearing it all before, I just stare at you, wishing you would wake up and tell the doctor to be quiet for me. I almost smile, practically hearing your sappy voice whining at the man, whinging until you got what you wanted, like always. Then, when he left, we would grin at each other and we would escape with your wheelchair. I would push you out of the synthetic hospital, past the busy nurses and doctors, out of the doors and through the blooming gardens, until we were free. And while we do this, with our remaining adrenaline pumping, I would be able to hear your laugh once more, harmonising with mine.
Yet, your voice doesn’t sound and I am forced to sit silently through his lecture.
While the doctor rambles on, I begin to think about our past. Reminiscing of the days we met and the days we parted, the infinite memories that we created together, brings a melancholic smile to my face. I remember it all as if it only happened yesterday.
- - - - - - - - - -
Rushing past the hurrying students, I sprint to the high school playground, the spring air drying my throat. When I arrive, as expected, there is an ocean of people in front of the notice board. Going to the back of the herd of noisy girls, I skim past the colourful heads, walking along until I see the second year section.
Even though I totally dread having to do this, with a deep breath, I dive in. Bending down and pushing past, I make my way through the hot and stuffy channels of females. Ignoring the brief exclaims and complaints, and enduring the sharp elbows and hurtful knees. Time passes slowly as I swim through the different limbs. Sweaty and slightly disorientated, I consider how much further I would have to go. Then, through the gaps of girls’ legs, I see the light. With a final dash forward, I explode out of the crowd. With a deep breath of fresh air, I cheer in silent triumph at being in front of the huge mob.
I stare up at the large board, searching for my name within the jungle of names.
Itano Tomomi…Itano Tomomi…
“We’re not in the same class! How could this be?”
I jump with shock at the sound of the loud whine next to me. Incredulously turning to the side, I see the girl with the voice that I easily recognise, the unique pitch imprinted onto my brain. I grin at her, everything around us fading as I focus on my best friend; Kasai Tomomi. The girl that I have known for over half of my entire life. And the girl who nearly made me wet myself.
Calming down from the initial shock at my best friend’s arrival, I ask, “What?”
“Look!”
Concentrating my gaze on the direction of her pointed finger, among the mass of names, I see my name under Class 2-C and just across, I see Tomomi’s name, in Class-D. My eyes widen with initial shock. This will be the first time we will be in separate classrooms and a sort of loneliness starts. However, I expected this, being in an extremely large high school and so I shove aside the lonesomeness. Besides, it was about time we weren’t together 24/7.
I smile, watching the bemoaning expression on the girl’s face. “Calm down Tomo, you’re only the next class along.” I soothe.
I watch with amusement as Tomomi’s melodramatically threw her arms into the air, suddenly hanging onto my right shoulder with despair. “But it’s not the same!” she cries. “I won’t be able to stare at Tomo-chin’s concentrated face or her unsure face or-”
“Okay, I get it.” I say, my cheeks beginning to heat up at her description of attention. Although I also knew all of Tomomi’s expressions, having witnessed them all enough times, embarrassment still projects through me at the voicing of her personal knowledge of me.
Brushing Tomomi off, I try to ignore her sniffling. However, even though tears appear in Tomomi’s eyes as often as I eat rice, they still affect me. So, I wrap a single arm around Tomomi’s quivering shoulders.
“Let’s go to class. And then I’ll treat you to something at lunch.”
As soon as I finish, Tomomi looks up at me with a beaming smile, making my chest flutter with surprise.
“Okay! Let’s go!”
I shake my head in disbelief. This girl could be an actress. However, even as she drags me forcefully in the direction of our respective classrooms, I can only smile as her warmth envelops me like a cosy blanket.
- - - - - - - - - -
I stare down at the playground from the rooftop, placing my empty lunch bow at the ledge. The spring breeze is calming, the afternoon almost relaxed, much unlike this morning. Observing the tiny figures move around, I wonder how the first years are getting on. I remember my first day being hectic and frightening. With a new school, new people and new learning criteria, it was daunting. If it wasn’t for Tomomi, I don’t know how I would have survived. Suddenly, a rush of pity washes over me and I feel sorry for most of the first years. Not everyone can have someone like Tomomi.
“Are you going to continue Dance Club Tomo-chin?” I hear Atsuko call from behind me.
I turn to face her, giving a nod. Atsuko, Takamina, Mii-chan, Mariko, Haruna, Yuko and Tomomi continue their conversation about clubs, while my body is abruptly beckoned by the call of nature.
“Just need to go to the bathroom.” I state, not bothered if they heard me or not.
Quickly jogging down the stairs, I head to the bathroom.
-
Flushing the toilet and relieved of the painful pressure of my bladder, I am about to unlock the door, when I hear the loud chatter of people entering. I don’t know why, but I pause. From the voices, I recognise that there are two people. I hear the sound of conversation and washing of hands. I don’t understand why but instinctively I stop to listen for a moment. And as my intuition must have suspected, I suddenly hear one of the girls say my name.
“What do you think of Itano-san?”
Why are they asking about me?
“She seems pretty nice. I wouldn’t mind getting to know her since this is the first time we’ve been in the same class.”
My ears perk at her response and despite my situation, I grin at the compliment.
“But… don’t you think Itano-san is close to Kasai-san?”
My smile instantly disappears. My heart drops and squeezes with discomfort as I hear Tomomi’s name. Confusion fills me at the association with us. Of course I am close with Tomomi; she is my best friend after all. Irritation suddenly develops at their audacity to gossip about us and my hand is on the door handle before I know it. However I halt as the girl, who said wanted to be my friend, defends me and Tomomi.
“Yeah, they are friends after all.”
She is definitely becoming my friend.
“I mean too close.” emphasises the other. “As in, more than friends.”
All air escapes me as the surprise settles itself in my brain.
More than friends? What did this mean?
Tomomi is nothing more than my best friend. There is nothing more. An odd and uncomfortable sensation tingles through me and all I want to do is rush out. I don’t want to hear anymore. Yet, my body remains tense, unable to move. All I can do is listen and hope that the friendly girl would defend me once more.
“No way.” she mutters. “But that’s… so gross. They can’t be together.” she unreservedly retorts.
I try to control my breathing as I turn cold.
Please stop.
A self-loathing impresses itself on me, even though I’m not sure why.
“But they are always together. During breaks, during lunch, to and from school, and probably after school they are always together. And when they aren’t, they’re always talking about each other. I don’t think I’ve ever heard Kasai-san talk about anyone else other than Itano-san. And she’s in my class.”
“That is true…”
“And they’re always linking arms or holding hands. Don’t you think that’s strange if they are just friends? I mean, we don’t do that. At least, not every day.”
“I guess so… Maybe they really are together… That’s so wrong.”
“Tell me about it.” she finishes with a disgusted tone. “Oh we better hurry, the bell is about to ring.”
Light footsteps exit the bathroom and fade away. However, even when they are completely gone, I cannot move. With one hand clamping my mouth shut and the other holding the door to keep it shut even though I know it’s locked, I silently let the unexplainable tears roll down my face.
-
Washing my face, I stare at my reflection. I sigh at the red eyes, biting my lip with aggravation. Suddenly the bell rings, signalling the end of lunch. Shaking my head, I take my handkerchief out of my pocket, about to wipe my face. However, as I pat my face dry, I stare at the tiny cloth. Peach coloured, with cherries dotting the surface. A handmade gift from Tomomi. I gaze at it, in mid-air as I press it against my cheek. Suddenly, a conflicting emotion surges through me and angrily I shove the handkerchief back into my pocket.
Storming out of the bathroom, I blindly make my way to the classroom. With my desperate pace, it isn’t long before I reach the classroom corridor.
“Tomo-chin!”
Her voice grips my heart, the pain almost crippling. Though I normally would turn to her immediately, I don’t. Instead I quicken my steps, keeping my head down and try to mentally block the brash voice. However, I suddenly feel a hand on my shoulder, halting me. I know instantly it is Tomomi. Even though I wish I could carry on, I can’t. I can attempt to ignore Tomomi’s voice, but I can’t ignore her touch. However, I don’t to dare to look at her, unable to bear the pressure.
“What took you so long?” brightly asks Tomomi. “I was waiting for ages. The others even left Chiyuu alone.”
Extremely aware of her touch and feeling the stares of the passing students, my control breaks.
“Let go of me!”
I thrash my arm out of Tomomi’s hold, anger preaching its wrath upon me. With the violent move, I find myself staring at Tomomi’s shocked face. Honestly, even I am shaken by my rash action, but her touch and those presuming stares were burning me. However, after the initial shock, Tomomi’s face becomes one of concern.
“What’s wrong Tomo-chin?” asks Tomomi, her voice embedded with worry, making my heart ache further. She edges a bit closer as I don’t give a response. “Have you been crying?”
I stiffen, my hand nearly reaching up to touch under my eyes. Snippets of the conversation that made me behave this way sound in my head and I remember why this is wrong. I can’t go through it again. Those days in elementary schoolm when no one would even acknowledge me, to the extent that I almost forgot how to talk. I can’t be ignored again.
“No!” I crossly spit.
Then, beyond my gaze of Tomomi, I see the quickly growing crowd. I pick up on the hushed whispers, my body prickling with their judging stares. And amongst the excited, curious and insensitive mutterings, I catch a sentence that pushes me off the wall.
“A lovers’ tiff?”
With fear, I glance at the direction of the cutting statement and see two girls, glaring at me with repulsion.
Were they the two?
However, surrounding us are other girls wearing similar expressions; presumptuously assessing and condemning. Like a trapped animal, I don’t know what to do and this feeling of incapability and hopelessness makes me even more afraid and panicked.
“Tomo-chin…”
I return my attention to Tomomi and wish I hadn’t. Immediately, along with the other chaotic sentiments, guilt joins them when I see the welling eyes of Tomomi. Much different from the crocodile tears, her eyes are reflecting so much hurt and uncertainty that I am forced to look away.
“I can’t do this anymore.” I pitifully force out and I walk away, trying to not meet any off the audience’s eyes as I enter the sanctuary of my classroom. I’ve made up my mind. I’m a deserter.
“Tomo-chin, wait!” I hear Tomomi cry, which makes the tears easily swell, flooding my pupils.
However, I do not stop and soon I hear the yells of the teachers, telling everyone to get to class. And though it hasn’t even been a minute, I already feel a dark void in my chest.
- - - - - - - - - -
Days pass and it is another end of another dreadful day. I lay my head on my crossed arms placed on the desk, my usual position these days.
“I haven’t seen Tomomi around.” I hear Atsuko address me.
I don’t answer her. My will to do anything has left me, leaving me irritable, unbothered and plain unpleasant. I know this. But I can’t help it. I just can’t be bothered anymore.
“You know, if you did something, you should apologise.”
“I didn’t do anything.” I quietly mutter, turning my head to face the blank wall. This is better than having to look at Atsuko’s disappointed expression. I hear her sigh, which makes me feel more inferior than I already am. I’m already guilty enough with what I did to Tomomi.
Only a day after did I realise how foolish I was. The void that I felt quickly enlarged and I realised that if it wasn’t for Tomomi, I would still be friendless. Now, because of my useless fear, I lost the closest friend I could possibly have. I didn’t care about the rumours or judgement. I just wanted my best friend back. However, no matter how many times I call, text, email, she ignores me. Tomomi has not come looking for me either. In fact, I don’t think I’ve even seen a glimpse of her. Even though she is only next door, approaching her was far more difficult that I thought it would be. When I go to school, I don’t see Tomomi. When there are breaks, she is never there when I go to the class. At lunch, she disappears and doesn’t even have lunch with the others anymore. When it is the end of the day, I dash to her classroom, but even though she is only next door, she is already gone. And the one time that I went to her house, knowing her parents would be at work, she completely dismissed my shouts. That night I was made to walk home in the coldest spring nights I have experienced, and I know it’s because I was without the person who always shared her warmth with me.
However, I deserve it.
“You should talk to her. Make it right Tomo-chin.” Atsuko says. “No matter what you did, if she loves you, she’ll forgive you.”
My stomach jumps and I bolt upright. Yet, Atsuko is already gone.
What did she mean by ‘love’?
Yes I love Tomomi, but as a friend. Surely that was what Atsuko meant. No way does this anxiety, terror and unfathomable yearning has anything to do with love. There is no way.
Yet I know it my heart, no matter how much I may deny it, I know it is the truth. Sometimes Atsuko knows my true self better than me.
However, my comprehension may have occurred too late. Tomomi may never talk to me again.
-
The night is cold and desolate as before. I gaze up at the house that is only five minutes away from mine. I can see Tomomi’s room window, the white curtains lightened by the buttery bedroom light. She is probably studying or watching one of the TV dramas. She probably isn’t thinking about me.
I glance at the gate, which is usually open for me. However, like the other day, it is locked. Shaking the tiny pebbles in my palm, I take one into my other hand. Aiming roughly, I throw it at Tomomi’s window. I miss. Trying again, I take another pebble and throw. I miss again. A sigh of aggravation escapes me. I throw another. It… misses again. I release a small cry of infuriation at my poor sporting skills and at this situation. Balling the rest of the pebbles in my fist, I throw back my arm and toss them at the window.
To my surprise, most of them hit the window. Suddenly I see the shadow appear behind the curtain and I have the urge to run. However, I stay still, waiting for Tomomi to reveal herself. And she does, quickly pulling back the curtain with a guarded appearance. I see her eyes widen when she sees me and our eyes lock for the first time in what feels like forever. Even from this distance I can see the sorrow in her gaze, and I expect her to close the curtains on me. However, she doesn’t. I see Tomomi fiddle with her window lock and throw it open.
We stare at each other in silence. To be honest, I don’t have a speech prepared. I was expecting my plan to fail and that I would go home alone again. However, now that Tomomi is actually listening, I don’t know what to say, and Tomomi remains quiet.
“I’m sorry.” I call, the only words that form in my head.
However, Tomomi waits, persisting to say nothing. I think of words to say, searching my apparently non-existent vocabulary.
“Please forgive me.” I shout, not caring if the neighbours will yell at me to quieten down. “I’ll do anything.”
Tomomi continues to stare at me, but this time with a hesitant gaze. And just as I think Tomomi is going to say something, she closes the window and the curtains. All my optimism is gone and replaced by despair.
How could I be so naïve?
Of course Tomomi wouldn’t forgive me so easily. I was cruel and unreasonable. It was senseless to think that anyone would forgive me for what I did, especially to my best friend. Well, I hope she is.
I am about to leave when I am slightly blinded by the bright glow erupting from the opened door. I see Tomomi stand at the doorway, and giving me a vague glance; she steps outside and opens the gate. I watch her, while she avoids my gaze. When the gate is opened, she heads inside first, and I quickly follow. This is my chance and I don’t want to lose sight of her.
Closing the front door, making sure it is locked, I enter the living room. I stop at the doorway, seeing Tomomi sitting on the couch. She glimpses at me, then to the empty space next to her. Cautiously, I sit next to her, never having felt so nervous and timid around Tomomi since the first day I met her.
“Tell me why you did it.”
As usual, Tomomi is direct. I try to settle my uneasy heart, sorting out my words carefully. I shift my eyes to her, making sure she is looking at me. Tomomi is. This gives me the courage that I need to begin.
“That day… I was being stupid and scared and… I don’t know. I just didn’t want people to presume about us…me. I didn’t want them to judge me. I didn’t want them to think that we were together. I didn’t want them to say our relationship was something else, when even I don’t know what it is.”
Overcoming the unsteadiness and disconcertion of my speech, I begin to go with the flow.
“But after all this, when you weren’t there, I thought properly of how I feel. In these few days, I’ve missed you so much. Tomomi, you are the one person I need. You are the one that lifted me when I was down, you were the one that saved me when we were little, and you were the one that talked to me, hugged me, loved me and if it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t be who I am today. You make my life worth living and I just… I love you. I love you so much.”
Finally, I confess what I truly feel. The fear that I felt when I heard the girls talking about us was not because of the judgements of our relationship. I didn’t care about the others. At least, after thinking about it, it wasn’t about everyone else. I was just terrified Tomomi would discover that I was harbouring this unconventional and conspicuous love and that she would hate me. I can bear the weight of everyone else’s hatred, but Tomomi’s would be crushing.
“So, please don’t leave me.” I quietly finish, pleading, as I stare at her.
Her expression is surprised and dubious. This is expected. However, it soon transforms into one of relief and tearful happiness. This is truly unexpected.
“All I ever wanted was for you to love me back.”
I stare at her, my ability to speak now subdued again. Tomomi suddenly brings me into her tender embrace. Immediately I am enveloped in the familiar and comfortable warmth that only Tomomi can produce. An immense sense of relief engulfs me and I feel my supressed tears finally overflow. This is what I’ve wished for in my dreams. This is all I need. Just to be Tomomi’s forever.
Feeling Tomomi moving back, I tighten my grip. Not yet. I don’t want to let go just yet. It could too easily be a dream, and if it was, I just want it to last a bit longer.
Nevertheless, Tomomi pulls back again and this time I release her. She stares at me, while I return the attentive gaze, hypnotised by the brown orbs.
“I love you too.”
I think my heart is going to burst. The words that I’ve heard many times from Tomomi’s mouth have never touched me so much. And before I know it, her lips are on me.
Soft, luscious and mine. My eyes blissfully close, my heart fluttering. We take turns catching each other’s bottom lips, endlessly tasting each other. I breathe in her breath, swallowing, just so part of her could be absorbed and become part of my existent. Before long, her arms are around my neck and mine are grasping her back. I don’t want this to ever end.
In this bliss, we don’t hear the door unlock and the sound of approaching steps.
“Tomomi we’re back. Did you miss-”
I feel Tomomi freeze against me and I too do the same. I open my eyes and look at the terrified expression that is covering the one I adore. Frightfully I force my head to turn, and I am met with Tomomi’s parents, wearing the most horrified expression I have ever seen.
-
“Papa, please!”
I stand in the middle of the living room, facing the ferocious and towering figure that is Tomomi’s father while Tomomi’s mother holds back her daughter.
“That is enough!” he bellows, making another bullet of fear shoot through me.
“Please Sir, understand, I lo-”
A gasp is forced out of me when a hand slaps me across the face so strongly that it felt like a brick. My ears ring, the vibrations from the blow spreading from my head, down my spine. Cupping my stricken face, I stare at Mr Kasai. Even though I am a woman, he is unforgiving, glaring at me with livid animosity. The pulsing pain quickly brings tears to my eyes and I already feel my cheek begin to swell.
“Honey!” exclaims Mrs Kasai. “She is only a girl!”
“I do not care!” he furiously retorts. “This… thing is not a woman. And I do not want her dragging my daughter into the depths of her misguidedness and to lead her down this disgusting path.”
Behind Mr Kasai, I see Tomomi struggling, tears dripping down her chin, crying out at her father to stop.
“Leave. I no longer want to see you here ever again.” he instructs, and when he leans down he adds with a hiss, “And do ever go near Tomomi or I’ll really show you what I do to people like you.”
Another stab of terror wrenches into me and I retreat, quickly leaving the house, compelling myself not to look back. My illusion is shattered and I am facing the cruel reality of our situation. As if our parents would actually allow such a taboo relationship. I already see my parents’ reaction, matching Tomomi’s parents, their disappointment and anger depressing me further.
As I walk in the bitter cold, even though my cheek is in excruciating pain, Mr Kasai’s words echo in my head, hurting me far worse than his slap.
-
I lay on my bed, attempting to fall asleep. After crying for a few hours, my body is exhausted and all I want to do is sleep the pain away. Except, the mattress feels uncomfortable as I lay on my back, not accustomed to sleeping in this position. However, my cheek is sensitive and stinging, causing me not to be able to lie on either side, as it intensifies the throbbing. So I am forced to keep as still as possible, in the position you would lay a corpse in a coffin.
Suddenly I jump as I hear the sound of tapping on my window. I quietly hiss as my cheeks throbs at the sudden movement, but I stand to investigate. Opening the curtains and seeing the early hours of late spring, I see a minimised figure standing in front of our gate. My eyes widen when I realise it is Tomomi, frantically waving at me. Hesitantly I raise my hand in a makeshift wave, and I quickly open the window.
“Tomo-chin!” I immediately hear her cry.
Making a shushing gesture, looking behind me to check if my parents had awoken and about to enter my room, I shift my attention back to Tomomi.
“What are you doing?” I harshly whisper. “Your father will kill us if he finds out you’re here.”
“Who’s going to tell him?” she returns. “Just let me in.”
With an uncertainty, I nod. If Tomomi is brave enough to make this daring move to see me, the least I can do is let her into the house.
Carefully rushing downstairs, I watchfully open the door and allow Tomomi into the house. When I close the door, immediately I am engulfed into a hug, the coldness of Tomomi’s puffy jacket briefly shocking me.
How long has she been outside?
However, just as suddenly the embrace began, I am freed.
“Let’s run away.”
With astonishment, I stare at Tomomi’s excited and eager face. Then, I realise that Tomomi is dressed warmly and carrying a large rucksack and handbag. I am about to question Tomomi’s motive, going to convince her that this is a ridiculous idea. However, my cheek suddenly pulsates and Mr Kasai’s angry face flashes in my mind. This makes me hesitate and I focus again on Tomomi’s anticipating grin.
The next thing I know, I am in my room packing my things.
- - - - - - - - - -
The scent of mould and damp blends into the wonderful scent of the cup noodles as I pour in the boiled water from the old kettle. Placing the worn chopsticks over the lids of both noodles, I trod back to the other room, the only room other than the tiny bathroom and the almost non-existent kitchen, feeling the tatty carpet on my bare feet. Hopping onto the single bed of the shabby one room apartment, I hold Tomomi against me, who was previously sitting on the bed scouring through the job section of the local newspaper.
“Anything?” I ask.
“No.” she replies. “Most of them require at least a high school level education and those that don’t are looking for experienced drivers.”
With a sigh, Tomomi folds the newspaper, tossing it aside. She leans against me, holding my arms around her stomach like a safety rail.
“I miss home.” she mutters.
My heart twinges and I can’t help but agree in my head. However, what do you expect when you don’t really have a plan.
That morning, we just got on the first bus that arrived, hopped off at the last stop and looked for the cheapest hotel. We carried enough money and clothes to get us by the week, but it was tough, especially when it came to ignoring all the phone calls and listening to the angry and distressed messages of our parents. It wasn’t the most comfortable life, but we have each other and that has gotten us through.
However, nowadays, even with careful spending, we lack money and are beginning to grow hungry. Plus, our wearable clothes are dwindling, closely driving us to spend the little money we have to wash them. Yet, I can’t bear to go back because if we do, we will surely be forced to separate. Furthermore, with Mr Kasai’s job, Tomomi’s family could easily move, making it definite that we wouldn’t be able to see each other. And that is a fate that I do not want.
“I know you do. But… just a few more days.” I say.
After a moment, I feel Tomomi’s head nod against my chest and a smile plays on my lips. Gently tightening my hold around her stomach, I place a kiss on the top of her head, content.
- - - - - - - - - -
“Tomo-chin!”
I almost fall from the bed from shock. Unaware, Tomomi breathlessly rushes in, shaking her jacket from her body and throwing her shoes at the doorstep. I amusedly watch her dance around the small room, laughing at her ridiculously excited movements while being completely baffled. At last she faces me, a massive grin pasted across her mouth.
“There’s money in my account!” she yells, grabbing my hands and pulling me to my feet.
“What?” I ask, sure I misheard. I thought Tomomi had been cut off, after a few days of warnings from her father.
“Mama must have put it in!” she reasoned, continuing to celebrate by swinging my arms.
“How much is there?”
“¥125,000!”
Suddenly a burst of joy explodes from me. That is enough to last us for a few months! I give my own scream of happiness and I join Tomomi in a dance. Finally our days are starting to look bright.
- - - - - - - - - -
My eyes are heavy as I try to open them when I hear the front door unlock. However, my exhausted body does not agree with me and lulled by the unbelievably comfortable duvet and double bed, I soon feel myself quickly falling in the depths of sleep.
However that is short-lived when I feel the mattress sink from the newly arrived body. Wearily opening one eye, I see Tomomi smiling down at me, her hand lightly brushing the messy stands from my half snuggled face.
“Don’t you need to get ready?” she asks, blithely pulling down the duvet from my face.
After revealing my lips, Tomomi leans down and kisses them, leaving a warmness in my chest. With a moan, I stretch and sit up.
“So how was work today?” I inquire, leaning my head lazily against the headboard.
“Another usual day at the restaurant.” she replies, carelessly sprawling across the bed and over my covered legs. “The cook was so harsh today.” Tomomi complains into the blanket.
I grin. “Well you are his apprentice so he has to teach you correctly.”
Tomomi shoots me a defiant look. “Aren’t you supposed to be my girlfriend? You’re meant to be on my side.”
“I am.” I smirk. “Just not in the way you expected.”
Tomomi just rolls her eyes. That just makes my smile broaden and a contented affection blooms within my heart. However before I can relish this moment of tranquillity any further, as Tomomi said before, I need to get up.
“Right, I need to have a shower.” I announce, playfully slapping Tomomi’s firm buttocks.
With a yelp she rolls over, giving me the chance to get up. Giggling at Tomomi’s flustered pout; I don’t notice her get up too. Then, she is holding my arm, mischievously smirking.
“I also need a shower.” she proclaims.
“I need to go first.” I impishly return.
A leering glint appears in Tomomi’s eyes before she leans to closer to my face. “Well then, why don’t we have a shower together?”
I stare at the beaming vixen feeling the rush of adrenaline run through my body, awakening my inner beast. “I like your thinking.”
I grab her body and we friskily drag her inside. More giggles erupt from us as we both enter the bathroom, closing the door behind us, blocking out the world.
-
When I slip on my socks, I begin to feel the bed stir. I glance to my left, seeing Tomomi’s disordered hair border her beautiful face.
“You’re going now?” Tomomi sleepily questions, her eyes just opening as slits.
I smile at her adorableness. “Yeah, today’s my shift at the bar.”
“Okay. Be careful. I don’t want any unruly men touching my Tomo-chin.” Tomomi warns, even though she is in the midst of extreme drowsiness.
A sense of delight always materialises in me when I hear Tomomi’s loving cautions. With an affirmative, I lean down and routinely leave a kiss on her forehead and a peck on her pursed lips, before I get up.
“I’ll see you in the morning.”
With a hum of understanding, Tomomi is back to sleep and with a lingering gaze, I head out to another night of work.
- - - - - - - - - -
The warm spring breeze passes through the open flower gardens. The sun is setting and the disappearing rays highlight the casually dancing clouds circling above the park. We walk side by side, our hands connected, enjoying the remaining hours of the day.
“This has been such a wonderful day.” speaks Tomomi. “First the romantic dinner, then the picnic in the flower gardens and then the boat ride across the lake. It has been just perfect.”
I smile, proudness building in me at my surprise celebration. “Well it is our five year anniversary. So I wanted to treat my beautiful and perfect girlfriend to the best day ever.”
Tomomi’s smile is as stunning as the sunset behind her and I revel in this satisfaction. Five years we’ve been together, yet it only feels as if it’s been a week. Five years is only a short time when it comes to infinity; the amount to which I will continue to love Tomomi.
She kisses my cheek and the usual blush presents itself on my cheeks. Tomomi skips ahead, happily dancing through the spitting water, the fountain lights outshined by her presence. Her melody of a laugh sings to me and I just watch over her as she dodges the momentary columns of water that sprout up from the floor. However, as I contently observe, it doesn’t take my mind off the momentous question I am about to ask. I nervously put my hand into my pocket and lightly touch the box at the bottom.
The small box that contained our future.
The box that contained the personally designed platinum engagement ring.
- - - - - - - - - - -
I pace apprehensively, up and down the large bedroom, fiddling with the waist of my silk and satin white dress.
“Nervous?” asks Atsuko, sitting relatively calm on the bed, my maid of honour.
“Of course I’m nervous!” I exclaim. “My heart is pounding, my palms are sweating and I swear every five minutes I feel like I’m going to throw up.”
“Sounds more like you’re pregnant.” she mutters.
I shoot her a glare, while continuing to pace. It is amazing that I haven’t tripped on the lengthy and expensive material. I knew that this was coming since the moment Tomomi accepted my proposal. But I never thought I would be this frightful. Though I know for definite this is what I want, as I wait, ridiculous situations start to pop into my head.
What if Tomomi runs away? What if she says no? What if someone objects? What if someone kidnaps Tomomi during the ceremony and I never see her again? What if-
Suddenly there is a knock at the door and I freeze. My heart bolts up into my throat, clogging my saliva. With a churning stomach, I watch the door open and see Shinobu peek in.
“You ready?” she asks.
I glance at Atsuko, who confidently smiles, before standing and hooking my arm around hers.
“We’re ready.”
With a nod, Shinobu disappears and I feel Atsuko begin to lead me. Nervous and fearful, I simply follow her steps, allowing her to guide me because I don’t think I can walk on my own. I hear the organ piano begin to play the wedding march. My heart is still stuck in my throat, and when we enter the ceremony hall, my chest tightens when I see the eyes of our friends and colleagues. Keeping my eyes forward, Atsuko guides me down the aisle as I am surrounded by the sounds of awe. It seems like forever before we reach the front pedestal. Leaving me next to the priest, Atsuko gives me an encouraging nod before she disappears behind me to the side. With a deep inhale through my nose, I fretfully wait for Tomomi to arrive.
Then, when I hear the sounds of awe again, I turn and I freeze. As soon as I see Tomomi, I am stunned.
It is as if time has slowed. Everything fades away and all I can see is Tomomi’s beaming grin and the twinkle in her eyes that I have never seen. With each step Tomomi takes down the long aisle, the glowing white dress falls flawlessly behind her. No words can describe how beautiful Tomomi is today. She is simply breath-taking.
When Tomomi steps onto the platform, across me, she nods to Shinobu who gives her a heartening thumbs up before she moves to the other side behind Tomomi, opposite Atsuko. She smiles at me and all my anxieties vanish. This is all I want. To be Tomomi’s forever.
The priest begins and my attention on his words gradually fazes. I only focus on the woman who I sincerely worship with my entire heart, soul and body. This reality feels unreal and I can’t help but want to pinch myself just to make sure this isn’t some wonderful dream. This sense of security and oneness that I have never felt before is like an illusion. However, it is real and this is meant to be.
“Now for the brides’ vows. Itano-san.”
Inhaling a shaky breath I take Tomomi’s gloved hands into my own, feeling the thin lace contrast against my bare skin.
“Kasai Tomomi. Ever since I met you, I knew that you would be my best friend. When you first transferred to our school, you didn’t see me as the strange quiet girl. You saw deeper than that and extended your hand to me. That day you accepted me for who I was. You were my first friend and will forever be the closest person to me.” I take another shaky breath and continue, feeling my nose start to tingle, warning me of the oncoming tears. “I can never really express to you how much I love you or how much I need you or how grateful I am to you, but by this marriage I hope to spend every day trying. Tomo I love you and I will love you for all eternity.”
I sniff in my tears and I smile. Tomomi sniffs as well and I see her smile with the glittering trails on her gorgeous face. She squeezes my hand reassuringly and pushes out the tears that have been teasing my eyes.
“Kasai Tomomi.” indicates the priest.
Breathing in, Tomomi gazes into my eyes.
“Itano Tomomi. The first day I laid eyes on you, I knew that I loved you. Every time you smile, laugh, cry, I want to be there with you. I want to be part of every moment. You’ve always supported me, even if my idea is dumb or I’m wrong, you are always there for me. When I’m scared or tired, you’re always there to see me through and pick me up. You are my pillar, my support, and without you, I can’t imagine who’ll I would be but I know I wouldn’t be happy. I’m so glad that you are part of my life and so much happier now that you are going to be my wife. You are my best friend, my soul-mate and the one who I want to be with forever. I love you more than words can describe. Tomo-chin, you are the one and only.”
Complete joy overcomes me and tears fully pour out of my eyes. However, it is the same for Tomomi and from the brief sniffs and whimpers, I can guess it is the same for some of the guests as well.
“Thank you for those beautiful vows. Now, can I have the rings?”
Takamina comes forward with the rings, quickly shooting us tearful smiles before retreating back to the side. We each are given a ring and as we slip on the rings on each other’s delicate finger, I can’t help but think this is perfect. As if my hand was designed for this moment, to hold Tomomi’s ring.
“Do you, Itano Tomomi, take Kasai Tomomi as your lawful wedded wife?”
I gaze into Tomomi’s glistening eyes.
“I do.”
“And do you, Kasai Tomomi, take Itano Tomomi as your lawful wedded wife?”
I have never seen her just look so… happy.
“I do.”
“By the power vested in me, I pronounce you wife and wife. You may now kiss the bride.”
Closing my eyes, I lean forward and we seal our binding promise to each other, with a loving kiss.
- - - - - - - - - -
It is a mixture of pink and white. There are small words on different parts, labelling the anatomy. Amongst the other items in the room, it rather stood out at me when we first entered. I stare at the model, bewildered.
It is a rather accurate replica of a woman’s vagina.
“You’re one doesn’t look like this.” I say, walking up to the hospital bed where my wife sat.
Propped up right by the bed, with her legs held open by the stirrups, Tomomi sits in her hospital gown. Tomomi simply shakes her head, but I see the small smile of amusement on her lips.
“Isn’t it strange that Acchan and I are pregnant?” Tomomi utters, changing the subject.
“Well we were trying at the same time so it’s a bit expected.” I answer, my head still looking around the room.
“Tomo-chin~”
Hearing Tomomi’s familiar whine, I sit down on the stool beside her.
“I’m sorry.” I smirk. “Yes Tomo, it really is strange. To think that Atsuko, who did the insemination around the same time as us, would be pregnant now is astounding.”
Tomomi playfully slaps my arm but she is grinning. I giggle, and out of the blue, the doctor enters. I quickly quieten down; though maintain the smile, welcoming the woman who has been taking great care of my pregnant wife.
“Sorry for the wait.” Dr Akimoto says. “So how are we?”
“Pretty good.” Tomomi replies. “Just starting to feel the morning sickness.”
“Well that is perfectly normal.” the obstetrician calmly replies. “Now, shall we take a look at you?”
Nodding, we observe as the doctor reveals Tomomi’s stomach and begins to squirt some sort of gel.
“Oh, that’s cold.” softly laughs Tomomi.
The doctor and I smile at her, but I sense apprehension coming from Tomomi and I. This is going to be our first sonogram and from the beginning of the day, we were quite nervous. We just wanted everything to go right.
Then with what seemed to look like a shop scanner, Dr Akimoto runs it over Tomomi’s faintly bulging belly. Suddenly, a moving image appears on the sonogram machine, the screen grainy, black and white. A pulsing can be heard, a sound exactly like the one Tomomi has whenever I place my head near her chest.
“That’s the heartbeat which sounds very healthy. And… this is your baby.”
I feel Tomomi holds my hand as we stare at the screen. The frozen image of a mass of grey and black. However, amongst the large area of blackness, I see the tiny, hazy, greyish blob. As I stare, I feel my eyes begin to water.
That is our baby. The tiny life that is soon to be ours.
“Would you like to know the sex?”
“You can tell us?” Tomomi gasps, squeezing my hand.
Tomomi looks at me and I excitedly nod. With a smile, Dr Akimoto announces that our baby is a girl. Even though I didn’t mind what gender our baby was, glee surges through me.
“I’ll leave you two alone for a moment.”
Dr Akimoto promptly exits the room and leaves us alone. Tomomi holds my hand tightly, both of us enclosed in our own silent bubble. We don’t need to say anything because we understand. That this moment is just ours and we are soon going to be a family.
“Isn’t she perfect?” whispers Tomomi.
“She is.” I quietly answer.
She truly is.
- - - - - - - - - -
Pushing open the door with my shoulder, I hurryingly enter the toasty house, placing the sodden bags of takeaway on the counter.
“I’m home.” I call. “And I brought you’re favourite take-away.”
Tomomi’s recent cravings including tossed salad smothered in vinegar, stir fried squid with extra onions and extremely spicy chilli grilled chicken breast, with a side of garlic bread. I can say for sure that it definitely not the best smell to sleep with, but Tomomi is the pregnant one and what she wants, she gets. And with today being my last shift of the week, I decided to treat her.
I shake of my jacket, the rain dripping off the waterproof material. “Tomo?” I holler again, throwing off my soaking shoes and peel off my waterlogged socks.
Entering our living room, I expect Tomomi to come gently paddling in, with her almost four month pregnant belly.
However, she doesn’t. I stop and realise just how quiet the house is. No television, no music, no sound of any movement. A terrible fear suddenly grips my heart and I dash through to the bedroom.
“Tomomi?” I yell.
As soon as I enter the room, I don’t see Tomomi on the bed as I wished. I look around the room, and to my absolute horror I see her feet peek out of the side of the bottom of the bed. I run to the side, my heart beating fifty times faster than normal. There, lying on the floor is my wife, unconscious. And just under her legs, I see the pool of blood.
“Tomomi!”
-
Rain continues to pour, relentless, unknowing or uncaring of the misfortunes that insignificant people suffer daily. And I am among them.
When I hear the sound of oncoming footsteps I look up and immediately am on my feet when I recognise it is Dr Akimoto.
“Is Tomomi okay?” I urgently demand. “How’s the baby?”
Instantly I notice the sorrowful demeanour and the deep frown that pastes itself of Dr Akimoto’s face. Immediately I want to run away, too cowardly to want to hear. However, my feet are grounded and I can’t move a muscle.
“I’m truly sorry to say this, but your wife has suffered from a miscarriage.”
My world comes crashing down and I collapse onto the unforgiving plastic chairs. My body is numb and my mind is blank. I see Dr Akimoto’s lips are moving but I don’t hear a word. In fact, I don’t hear anything. Not the rain, not my heart, not even the sound of my own breathing. Our dream bubble has popped and we are all that remains.
And I am the one that has to tell the one that I cherish more than anything, that we lost our baby.
- - - - - - - - - -
With the tray of easy to eat foods, I carefully enter the doorway of our bedroom. I sadly look on as Tomomi sits in her usual position on the bed, her arms crossed over her front, holding her now flat stomach. I feel my tears prick at my eyes, but I endure the pain. I have to be strong, for the both of us.
Taking a shaky inhale, I step forward.
“Tomomi I made you dinner.” I say, with a somewhat peppy tune. However she doesn’t even look at me, just staring blankly at the TV, which is off. Trying to seem indifferent, I place the tray on her stretched legs, even though my heart is trembling. “I made your favourite.”
Yet Tomomi still pays no heed. Just sitting, staring. I pick up the chopsticks and pick one of the finely cut fish pieces. I hold it to her mouth, but she doesn’t open. My hand starts to shake and I feel my lip begin to quiver. Biting my lip, I put the chopsticks back down.
“Please eat.” I softly beg.
Desperation is quick to build in me and I just don’t know what to do anymore. I pick up the tray and put it to the side. Not knowing what else to do, I lay back on the bed, next to Tomomi, copying her position. I stare at the TV, just as Tomomi is doing now and I place my hand on top of hers. I feel the familiar warmth, but it doesn’t heal my aching heart.
“I’m sorry Tomomi, it’s my fault.” I didn’t take better care of you.
Yet, once again, Tomomi doesn’t answer. My tears threaten to fall again and I can’t let Tomomi see. With a heavy sigh, I stand up.
“Stay.”
My head twists round as soon as I hear the sweet but exhausted voice. Tomomi is in the same position, however this time she is looking at me.
“Stay with me.”
Overcoming the initial shock, I rush to Tomomi’s side. This is the first time I’ve heard Tomomi’s voice in weeks that isn’t sobbing, whimpering or sleep talking. This is Tomomi.
Unable to hold back, I immediately bring Tomomi into an embrace. Holding her head against my chest, I frantically kiss the top of her head, not wanting to ever let go. In return, Tomomi wraps her arms around my waist, lying across me.
“She was ours.” I hear her softly mutter. However, I recognise the painful voice and know she is crying. “And… I lost her.”
I shush her gently, embracing her tighter, pressing her against me. I feel her weep against my chest, soaking my shirt. I wonder if Tomomi can feel the tears that drop on her hair or hear the sound of my heart breaking. Nevertheless, I don’t care. All I want to do is take away all of Tomomi’s pain and make it my own. But I am powerless. All I can do now is support her until she recovers.
I hold Tomomi until she falls asleep. However, even then I don’t let go, too terrified of the possibility that I’ll lose her too. So I continue to hold her, gently rocking her to and fro, promising never to let go. Humming the lullaby we would have sung to our baby daughter.
- - - - - - - - - -
Pulling on my jacket, I gaze behind me, wary of the fact that Tomomi is coming with me. I hesitate for a moment. It has been a few months now and I know that Tomomi has been getting better, eating her meals properly, going outside and even going back to the restaurant part-time. However, this is a massive step and I’m not sure if Tomomi can handle it.
“You don’t have to come.” I gently say, voicing my uncertainties. “I can just say you’re feeling unwell. They’ll understand.”
She gives me a brief look, before shaking her head. “Don’t be silly. I have to come for this.”
From the look, I knew that Tomomi was coming. I should have known. She is a tough woman, the toughest I know.
I give a curt nod, I let Tomomi go first and follow her outside to our car.
-
With me leading, we quietly enter the white hospital room. The cleanliness is almost blinding and our eyes take a second to adjust, but we go in.
“Hey you two.” calls Atsuko, as soon as we enter. “I’m glad you could come.”
I smile at Atsuko, who is lying on the bed. I turn back round to see Tomomi, and I notice her staring at the cot beside Atsuko. Atsuko must have noticed her gaze too because soon she is up on her feet, leaning into the cot. We stare with amazement as Atsuko suddenly stands, this time with a tiny bundle in her arms. Hesitantly, we make our way to Atsuko, standing on either side of her as she holds out her son. My eyes are immediately drawn as I gaze at the pale and miniature face of Atsuko. His high nose and pouty lips resemble Atsuko so much. I can’t help but feel my heart swell with elation and tears soon develop.
“Say hello Kai-kun. This is your Auntie Chiyuu and this is Auntie Tomo-chin.” we smile as Atusko’s soft voice introduces us. “They’re going to be your godparents.”
I freeze, and I feel Tomomi do the same. With wide eyes we gaze at Atsuko.
“Us?” Tomomi asks.
“Really?”
With a tender smile, Atsuko nods. “You can hold him if you like.”
At Atsuko’s bold words, I turn to Tomomi. However, unlike what I had expected, Tomomi is wearing a beaming smile. In a flash she is in the process of accepting the baby.
“He is adorable.” she coos, as Atsuko gently places the baby in Tomomi’s arms.
Immediately, Tomomi adapts to him and is rocking him gently. I watch with wonder as Tomomi softly bounces on her knees, holding the quiet baby against her. She begins to hum a melody that I instantly recognise. A sharp ache hits my chest, but I endure it. It is a pain that I have come to terms with, and though I know it will never quite go, I will become strong enough to go on with my life.
I walk around my wife, completely taken aback by her positive reaction. I sit beside Atsuko on the bottom of the hospital bed, observing the two as Tomomi fusses over Kai.
“How are you feeling?” I ask.
“Much better now that he’s out of me.” Atsuko huskily laughs, making me smile. “Just a bit tired.”
I nod an understanding.
“What about you?” she asks.
Honestly, I don’t know how to reply. It would be a lie if I said I was perfectly well, because I’m not. However, I am getting by, with Tomomi. And though it may be awhile before we are fine again, I know we will survive and perhaps soon will be happy once more.
“We’re getting there.” I answer and Atsuko accepts this with her own nod.
Suddenly, Tomomi is in front of me, holding Kai towards me. My eyes dart to Tomomi and Atsuko, as if asking permission. With their encouraging smiles, I hold out my arms and accept the tiny bundle. Immediately, as I hold him against my own body, the lightness surprising me, a sudden calmness fills me.
“Oh wow…” I hear myself whisper.
I stare at the tiny face and gently laugh when he gurgles and gently tosses before he finally settles back down.
“You’re a natural.” I hear Atsuko praise.
Bathing in the tranquillity, with my best friend on one side and my wife to the other, I silently cry. Through my tearful smile, I whisper a thank you and simply stare at the baby’s face that is new to this world.
- - - - - - - - - -
The old paper rustles in the spring breeze as I turn the book pages over with my wrinkled fingers. The porch swing rocks as the garden rustles and sounds their welcoming of the comfortable weather.
“Tomo-chin.” utters Tomomi to the side of me, her knitting needles clicking away.
“Yes?” I meekly answer.
“When did we get so old?”
I laugh, my voice husky and slightly out of breath. “I think after we hit 70 we officially became old.” I reply.
“I don’t want to be old.” she retorts. Even after all these years, Tomomi’s cute voice is the same, just with a bit of edge and a hint of croakiness.
“Why?” I ask, partly curious and partly humouring her.
“Because then we’ll have less time to spend together.”
I fall silent. The breeze blows through my greying hair and cooling my aged skin. I gaze at Tomomi as I find myself doing more often lately. Perhaps instinctively my mind knows that the end is coming and that it wants to savour the last moments, cherishing them until we in turn perish. However, with the fact that we are going to die laid out so barely, it makes me uncomfortable. I know that it is life and death is part of the cycle but I want this moment to last forever. I want us to last forever. And even though I know it won’t, I might as well try. At least we can treasure the present.
“Aren’t we together now?” I answer, pushing away the thoughts of the bleak future. “But…. I guess that isn’t enough.” I gaze at Tomomi, who looks as beautiful as ever, waiting for me to elaborate. “Okay, from now on we’ll do everything together. That means no cooking alone, no going out alone, no napping alone, no bathing alone…”
I trail off, the teasing suggestion making Tomomi’s eyes widen and a shy blush appear on her cheeks.
“Stop it you.” she raspingly giggles.
However, with a serious aura, I grab Tomomi’s hand. She stops and stares into me, as she always does.
“I mean it. Every moment of my life, I want to spend with you Tomomi.” I sincerely say, bringing her hands up to my chaste lips. “I love you.” And with that, I close my eyes and kiss the ring that bonds us with our promise to each other.
I glance up at Tomomi to discover her gazing at me with an enamoured expression, that I am sure is reflecting my own. Her eyes are shining and with a smile she whispers the words that I will never tire listening to.
“I love you too.”
- - - - - - - - - -
I lightly stroke the leathery skin of your ghostly arm with my fingertips and like every time I touch you, a warmth fills me, even if your actual skin is cold to the touch. However, this time the warmth is quickly replaced by anxiousness and sorrow.
I grasp your hand, careful with the IV drip, and hold it to my forehead.
Please wake up.
I continue to chant this phrase over and over, keeping your still hand against my forehead. I don’t know why I think this would be any better than actually speaking. However after days of non-successful tactics to wake you, I am willing to try anything.
So I continue to chant, wishing that perhaps with my telepathy, your eyes would open.
Yet, after an hour of chanting, you don’t stir. Not even a twitch of your fingers. Even so, I don’t give up because I am afraid that if I stop, you would truly disappear. So, as if my internal voice was binding to your soul, I continue chanting, keeping you grounded. Even as the despair builds inside me and overflows as tears, I continue. Perhaps my sanity is finally diminishing, but I don’t care.
Just one more time. I want to hear your voice just one more time.
“Tomo…chin…”
My eyes snap open, lightly sprinkling the salty crystals across my skin. My eyes lock on yours. Even with the deep wrinkles around your tired and partially sedated eyes, I still see the kind spark that made me love you. My aged hands hold onto your hand tighter, now truly afraid to let go. I don’t know if this is a dream, but if it is, I don’t want to wake up.
“Tomo…” I whisper.
I silently gasp when I see you smile, the same grin that makes my elderly heart flutter. I bite my lip as I try to keep my tears from cascading.
“Do you have to go?” I mutter, surrendering to the unavoidable tears.
“Yes.” you answer, giving the tiniest of nods, maintaining that flawless smile of yours.
I suddenly feel the gentlest of squeezes as I hold your hand. Forcing a smile through the terrain of tears, I hold your hand against my cheek. Lightly you cup it, and even I can sense the struggle with your last ounce of strength.
“I… love you.”
A sob escapes me and I know the evitable is coming. I just hold your hand against my cheek, sobbing as I look down at you fading away.
“Tomomi…I love you…I love you so much.”
You beam and we just smile at each other until, with one final glance, your eyes close. Another choking sob erupts from me and I hold your hand tightly, unable to let go even when it goes limp.
And when the machine sounds an endless bleep, I know you have joined the angels in heaven, to live a new eternity.
-
Entry #12
Title: Deal
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Itano Tomomi, Matsui Jurina; Tomomi/Jurina
Word Count: 2,128
Deal
She abhorred working in this wretched place.
She had the talent to give hope to people and to deceive them when they felt that the victory was theirs. She had to endure the horrified, enraged, hopeless faces with a cold stare as they lose all of their possessions on a shuffle of her palms.
She hated that job yet she felt that these people deserve that suffering. Everyone was the same, bodies wrapped in money and gold but rotten hearts. She was trained to see through them and every single movement, subtle or obvious, revealed their souls.
She walked through the crowd, surveying the pathetic people wasting their money in useless gamble, the mixture various perfumes, smoke of cigarettes made her sick and the noises of yells and incomprehensible music made her head spin.
However, amidst all of those people, she saw someone who looked out of place: real jewel among the heap of garbage.
She caught sight of the young woman who looked lost as she swayed through the crowd. Physically she looked the same as the others with her pink long gown and diamonds. But Jurina knew that she was different.
The girl suddenly fell forward as they were near each other, tripping over her gown. The young dealer used her reflexes to catch her.
“Are you alright?”
The young woman did not answer. As Jurina helped her stand up, she pulled away and ran towards a nearby balcony.
Unsure why she was interested, Jurina followed the stranger, hiding behind the curtains. She watched through the lace as the young woman stepped down from her beautiful shoes and stared at the empty sky, her chin resting on her hands as her elbows rested on the marble balcony. Her composure from being a young lady changed to that of a young innocent girl.
“Itano-san, it’s time to go,” a man said. Jurina hid in the shadows as she watched Itano wear her pumps, changing to her regal composure. She watched as the lady gave a forced smile on her face as she was escorted out of the hall. The dealer watched from the windows as she went inside a handsome car and left.
“Itano-san…” she repeated the name in her head. “What is she doing in this kind of place?”
Jurina wondered if she would see her again.
***
Another week had passed and Jurina wondered if she would see the lady again. She tried to compose herself as she stopped in front of the door of the private room where she was assigned for the night. When Jurina entered the private parlor with her tray of cards and tried to hide her surprised look when she saw ‘Itano-san’, sipping her nonalcoholic cocktail and trying to show some interest which did not work for the dealer. Jurina eyed her carefully: her smooth face, glittery eyes and unique pout that the dealer thought was cute.
But Jurina knew that the girl hated to be there. She just did not know why.
“Good evening, gentlemen,” she greeted with a bow. She fixed her tie, a mannerism of hers, before taking a fresh deck of cards from her tray, unpacking it carefully in front of the players. She started to shuffle the cards and gave the honor to the man in the middle to cut the deck.
“Tomomi, can you cut the cards?” The man asked, giving her the deck that Jurina had shuffled.
So, Tomomi’s her name…
“She’s my luck, you see?” He explained to the dealer, who gave a smile, not to the man but to Tomomi, who cut the deck into two shyly, trying to avoid the dealer’s firm gaze.
“Thank you,” Jurina said with a stare that did not falter as she took them.
Jurina thought she was right. She could never let that old man lose even though she hated him with a passion. It was Tomomi’s cut, after all.
The game ended with the man laughing happily as he gathered chips and trinkets that he got from the opponents. He whispered something to Tomomi before he left. The woman followed but she went a different way, passing by Jurina and handling an envelope silently before going away.
Jurina was not surprised when she spotted Tomomi in the same balcony. She wasn’t staring at the sky anymore, but she was crouching on the ground, the hem of her gown spread on the floor, crying.
Jurina took her handkerchief and offered it to Tomomi, who slapped her hand away. “You’re like all of them,” she said. “Go away…”
“Well, aren’t you…?” Jurina asked. She felt offended that she snapped but she regretted opening her mouth.
“You took the bribe.”
Jurina took the envelope from her pocket and gave it to her. “I don’t need it. I couldn’t let a lucky girl lose when she cuts the cards.” Her statement made the girl look up at her, revealing her ruined make up.
Jurina crouched down with her and gave a smile, a real smile. “Hey, what are you doing in this place? You don’t belong here.”
“Itano-san?” a voice called out.
Tomomi stood up and gave a small shy smile before running away from the balcony to go home. But before she parted the curtains, she said in a small voice, “I had a deal with a devil. A very foolish deal.”
Jurina stood there behind the lace curtains as Tomomi transformed into a casino princess as she left the hall.
***
Jurina was bothered for a few nights, trying to catch a glimpse of Tomomi in the crowd. She was always called in the private rooms but to her dismay, the girl she was looking for was not in there.
“I had a deal with a devil…” the words echoed inside her head. Was it a debt? Was it a bet? She was living a life of a princess but she thought that the life she was living was hell. What was the truth behind this mysterious girl?
Jurina rubbed her forehead with a small smirk as she fixed her tie, and her hands through hair smooth hair. She was thinking too much. She practiced her fingers before they do their dirty work for the night but she stopped when she heard sobbing from the corner of the ladies’ room.
She followed the voice and knocked on the cubicle. “Hello? Are you alright?”
“Leave me alone.”
The syrupy voice was oddly familiar. “I-Itano-san?” she asked in confirmation. She slowly opened the door and saw Tomomi looking un-princess-like. Her hair was in disarray, the little tiara that adorned her hair looked displaced. The makeup was already running down her cheeks because of crying. But even with those things, she looked beautiful, an angel in her white dress. On her hand was a veil.
“Please… save me!” she cried, jumping to Jurina’s arms. At that moment, the dealer’s heart stopped. She felt pain. This angel would soon go to hell. She placed her arms around the fragile thing as she listened. “I don’t want… I don’t want to be with him…”
There was no time to compute for the odds or to think of her chances. She suddenly grabbed Tomomi’s hand and walked towards the hall, almost dragging the young woman behind her. She gave a reassuring look and a kind smile. She would save her but she was unsure of what to do.
Jurina was still holding Tomomi’s hand when they reached the main hall where the old man was playing. She faced the man and said with her serious tone, “Won’t you play a game with me?”
“And what will be the prize?” he asked.
“Tomomi.”
The man laughed and it was enough to make the busy crowd of the casino stare at the two people in the middle. He sat down, showing his agreement. Tomomi was nothing but a trophy for him, and this trophy he would definitely win.
“If you lose, what would you give?” he asked as he watched the young dealer as she sat across the playing board.
“I won’t lose,” Jurina said, her eyes flaming with determination.
He laughed. “Let’s determine her fate,” he placed his chin on his knuckles and gave a sly smile, “in one hand. Winner takes all.”
Tomomi clasped her hands together as she sat down on a chair not far from the raised platform of the playing board.
The dealer went in between and started shuffling the cards. Jurina was eyeing the hand sharply as the cards were shuffled.
“Wait,” the man said, using his finger to motion Tomomi to come over. One of his men pushed the woman roughly towards the platform. “Cut the cards for me,” he said. He then looked at the young dealer and said, “Let’s see where your luck will side, Tomomi.” After she cut the cards, the dealer in-charge took them and the guard behind her pulled her back towards her chair.
The game began.
Jurina knew the game by heart. She knew how to win and how to deliberately lose. However, the odds of the cards in her hands were out of luck but she could not be on a tilt. This wasn’t a game where only worldly possessions are at stake, after all.
She shot a look at the old man who fixed his tie with a grunt. With a flick of his finger, the dealer distributed cards from his deck. Jurina pulled the new card towards her slowly, expecting for a miracle.
“Why do you want to get her?” her opponent asked. He smirked. “Ah, probably, it’s that.”
Jurina clenched her fist and stared at him with fire in her eyes. “And how about you? What are you going to do with her?”
“I can do anything,” he said tauntingly. “She’s my property after all.”
The statement filled her with anger but she could not lose it.
Jurina looked at the poor Tomomi who was really anxious about everything. She wanted to go to the princess and assure her that she would be free. The dealer ran her hands through her hair before she placed her hand on the new card and took a peek.
“Let’s end this.”
What was originally a minute game felt like eternity for Jurina as she made a decision, closing her eyes, fixing the cards on her hand and releasing a sigh.
Tomomi stood up from her seat nervously but a man restrained her. “Please…” she pleaded silently.
“Your hands please,” the dealer said.
The players laid their cards on the same time. Tomomi closed her eyes. Her life would be in the hands of these two men. Her future would be determined by a bet, a game.
It was the worst kind of deal.
Even Jurina’s eyes were closed as she shakily placed the cards on the playing board. Everyone around the raised platform whispered to each other and some were at awe.
“The winner for this game is… “
She could not bear to look or to lose.
“Matsui-san.”
Jurina opened her eyes and looked at the cards. She won by the miracle card. She looked across the table, seeing Tomomi’s silent tears glistening like diamonds on her face.
Tomomi’s luck sided with her.
The princess tried to get away from the man who restrained her but with no success. Jurina walked towards them. She gave a rolling kick to the man who was holding Tomomi, letting her go. She immediately ran towards Jurina, holding on to her arm tightly.
“We had a deal! Let her go!” she shouted as they were surrounded by men clad in black suits. The man, not turning towards them, raised his right hand and the men relaxed, letting the two go.
“You’re free.” Jurina painfully said. She let Tomomi go to be on her own and not to be owned again. She started walking out of the hall. She couldn’t continue to work in this place, after all.
“Wait!” Tomomi lifted the hem of her skirt and ran after Jurina. It was difficult running in that outfit. “I’ll go with you!”
Their eyes met. “I’ll go with you,” Tomomi repeated, sure of her decision. She had made a foolish decision in the past that was reversed by Jurina. Going with the dealer was a fast decision but she felt in her heart that she was so sure of it.
Jurina looked at her with those piercing eyes, weighing the odds, like she usually did. She then smiled as she offered her hand. She planted a kiss on the lady’s gloved hand.
“This is a deal that I surely won.”
-
Entry #13
Title: Yuki no Koi
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takayanagi Akane, Matsui Jurina, Matsui Rena; ChuriJuri.
Word Count: 2,128
Yuki no Koi
Yuki…
Snow is everywhere…
So winter has already come.
Another year has ended yet nothing has changed.
The empty and forceful smiles I usually shared to the other SKE members are still there.
The loneliness buried in my heart, the pain remaining in my vulnerable soul never disappearing.
And it’s all your fault.
I have become who I am now because of you.
Why did I ever want to meet you?
Why did I join SKE48 from the beginning?
Why did I want to talk to you, and end up falling for you?
“Churi!”
Why did you always call my name but never actually looked at me?
Yes, it is you, who I cared and loved so much since the first time we met. You, the face of SKE48, were always famous and popular among both SKE and AKB. Even though you were just a 15 year old girl, you had a matureappearance, and many talents that made you different from the other same-aged girls. You were not a captain of a team like Rikako or I, yet you always encouraged the members and restored their spirits before any performance, just like any real leader. You were still young, but you already had everyone looking up to you. The members loved you, admired you, wanted to be with you; seeing that, you spent most of your time with the other members, rather than be by yourself.
But let me ask you this. Except for the times that we were the models at photoshoots, have you ever talked to me like a real friend?
Most of the times I saw you, you were either talking with a member of SKE or fooling around, finding victims for your kissing game. I know you were very busy, participating in both Team S and Team K, so you didn’t have too much time with your fellow members. But you knew you were neglecting me, didn’t you?
When you were bored, you went to Mizuki. You fooled everyone that you two met, disturbing RenAirin’s time together by kissing Airi in front of Rena. You ended up getting chased by Gekikara. When you were excited, you would cosplay as a male character from a manga that you read with Yuria and Kanon. When you were lonely, you would choose to either, cling on to Rena, hang out with Shinoda Mariko or chat with Kumi. And when you were sad or upset, you went to Rena or Mariko, from AKB, for comfort. Tell me, was there anytime then that you wanted to spend that time with me, besides working?
Remember the time when you injured your foot during Team K’s lesson? When everyone in SKE, including myself, heard about the news, we were so worried that Rena, Rikako, Kumi and I took the earliest train to Tokyo to visit you in the hospital. When we arrived, with your bandaged foot shown to us, you greeted us cheerfully. Your famous cat smile formed on your pale lips. My heart ached when I saw how hard you tried to get up from your bed, just to show us that you were fine. But no, you were not fine. Sweat on your forehead and furrowed eyebrows formed whenever you moved, telling me that your injury was far worse than it looked. You could feel the pain clearly yet you still chose to smile and to chat happily with the others. The members gathered around your bed, asking about your health while I just stood near the door, watching you smiling at every question you received.
You were simply amazing, you know that? I could never compare to you, no matter how hard I tried. You rarely cried in front of someone, just so you wouldn’t botherthem. You would bear the pain so no one would worry about you. You would stress yourself with work, for the sake of SKE. Was the stress too much for a teenage girl like you?
You had done so much for both AKB and SKE, that you deserved a long break. But look at what you chose. You chose to work again, even though your foot had not recovered yet.
I found you crying alone in the backstage several times, after the performances, holding your swollen foot. Each time I approached you and offered to take you to the hospital, you would always shake it off and tell me that everything was fine, giving me your famous cat smile. Tears were rolling down your cheeks yet your smile never faded away. I just wished that one day you would stop being so stubborn and let everyone help you. You knew you would have to pay for your stubbornness after that, didn’t you?
Just not too long after your first injury, you hurt your foot again. It was the same injury, but this time, it was worse. The doctor told you to stop dancing for your own sake, but you refused, and joined our performance in Fukui with both AKB48 and SKE48. You were so incredibly stubborn that you had to pay for it, with your whole career.
After a long period of overworking yourself with work, your foot stopped obeying you.
It was a few months after the Fukui performance, that Rena and I decided to visit you in the hospital. It was supposed to be a normal day, but no, God always loved to tease us. Rena and I arrived at the hospital and accidentally ran into Akimoto-sensei. He was standing in front of the main door, talking into his phone. When he saw us, he replied our greeted bows with a small nod, and walked out to his car. His face reflected his unusual seriousness which gave us a bad feeling. Rena, nor I, knew why he came here. He only visited you once or twice when he first heard about your injury. It was extremely rare to find him here. Sensing something was wrong, we rushed to your room.
We knew, I knew, that there was only one possible reason for Akimoto-sensei to be there, but we did not want that to happen. I did not want that to become true.
Yet once again, my heart ached. This time, it was on the verge of breaking. When we opened the door, what welcomed us was not your usual cheerful smile, but a hurtful and depressed expression. Tears were rolling non-stop from your eyes. Right as you saw us, you tried to smile, but instead of smiling, you just busted into more tears. Seeing your motionless foot lying on the bed, our fears finally came true.
You couldn’t dance or move anymore.
I watched you sob into Rena’s embrace, who was also trying to hold back her tears,yet failed. I watched as you cried, not even trying to look strong like usual. For the first time, I saw how vulnerable you were. You did not know how much I wished I was Rena, so that I could comfort you with all my love. You did not know how much I wanted to become your strength, so you could stand up again. But they were just my wishes, not my decisions. I was so stupid that I just stood there, watching you like a stranger. I was such a coward. I did not dare stay by your side.
I was so weak that I could never confess my true love for you.
I watched you announce your graduation from AKB48, sobbing into Mariko’s arms. I watched you announce your graduation from SKE48, tears falling down your cheeks and onto Rena’s shoulder as you leaned on her,searching for comfort and support. I silently watched you leave your second family.
Everyone wanted to wipe your tears away but no one ever noticed mine.
I had thought that you would spend your last day with some AKB members, or your closest friends in SKE. I had thought that you would spend your last precious moments together, with the ones that gave you true happiness. But once again, I was wrong. You were really mysterious, you know that? I could never understand what you were thinking. I could never understand all of your decisions. Until now, I still have my question from that day.
Why did you choose your last day to be alone with me?
You did not want to spend time with Mariko so you let her go with Haruna. You did not want to cling onto Rena so you watched her go with Airi. You did not want to join Mizuki in her foolish tricks.
I stood in your hospital room, with all of your fellow member’s friends. We all heard your last request, so clearly, that no one could ever forget. You just wanted to spend time with me, alone.
Your true friends, satisfied with your wish, left us alone. I could not think anymore, my mind was just simply blank. I stared at you in confusion. You just smiled at me, reaching out your hand in an offering. Hesitantly, I took your hand and sat down on the bed next to you. Following your habits, you leaned onto me, placing your head on top my shoulder, still holding my hand. Your cold touch sent a new sensation, causing my heart to race with the wind. Your warm breath on my bare neck heated my face. I could not see my face at that time but I bet it could beat any tomato in the world.
It was the best moment that I could ever experience. It was so good to be with you - my first and last time to stay by your side. It was an unforgettable moment; I still remember every single word you said to me at that time.
“Churi, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry for ignoring you. I’m sorry for being so stubborn. I’m sorry that I have worried you so much.” Your voice, weak but soft and gentle, echoed in my mind.
“I’ve known all this time, that you have been watching over me from behind. I’ve known how much you cared and worried about me at the same time. And I know how cruel I was to ignore all that facts. I know how much I hurt you. I was so busy with my job that I forgot all about you. I was too selfish that I forgot about your presence with me. I don’t ask you for your forgiveness, but please, let me be with you one last time. Please accept my selfish wish just this time.”
I sat there and felt your warm tears mixed with mine roll down my skin. I held you tight, scared of losing you. I looked out the window and watched the falling snow. I was so afraid that you would be like the snow. That once I managed to touch you, you would disappear like you never existed in this world.
I was so afraid that I would never have a chance to see you again.
On that snowy day, I stayed with you one last time, sharing our last beautiful moments together. I wanted to treasure every second with you because I had a feeling it would be the last time I would ever see you.
And you know what? My feelings were always right. It was one of the reasons why I hated myself so much. After that day, you went with your mother to the U.S, so you can get your foot fixed.
I was preparing for a performance in the dressing room when suddenly Rena rushed into the room with tears falling from her eyes. I wished it would not be the truth. I wished I was wrong. But no, God never listens to my wishes. Along with every single word coming from Rena, my heart broke into pieces. It hurt so much that I ended up being like you, getting hospitalized for months.
You promised me that you would come back when you have fully recovered.
You promised me but you couldn’t do it.
Because of the snow, your plane crashed in the middle, on its way.
Yuki…
I don’t know whether I like snow or not. You used to ask me the same thing but I could not answer you then.
Snow brought you to me but it also took you away from me.
Then what would be my answer? Like or hate?
The answer is neither.
I love snow.
Because if this feelingis right, like they were before, you have never left me.
You are not here anymore, but your pure soul became a snow spirit.
I know that because I can feel your warmth on my skin.
Jurina, you are my one and only snow angel.
-
We announced this on our tumblr but might as well announce it here! :peace:
We have had an amazing donation from Karen L. She has sent us an astounding amount of 34 unique photos, not even counting all of the extras that she sent as well. The judges have spent the last few days freaking out about this generous donation. The photos are all gorgeous. Don’t believe us? Check it out for yourself, as they have all been added to our prize album (http://s1244.photobucket.com/albums/gg564/contest48/#!cpZZ1QQtppZZ20). If you would also like to donate to contest48, then please e-mail us ♥
We still need to add some pics in there, so be sure to check our album now and then!
Entry #14
Title: Unlimited Love
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Shinoda Mariko, Matsui Jurina; Mariko/Jurina
Word Count: 4,003
Unlimited Love
==========
Year 2023
==========
In the middle of the school backyard, there’s a person sitting on the bench under a big tree. Yellow leaves are falling down as the wind breeze on it. A name tag revealed this person’s name, Shinoda Mariko. She has brown short hair and charismatic aura, not to mention she is tall and has figure like a model. It’s hard to believe she actually is a teacher in this high school. She is now 26 years old, has been devoted herself to serve in this school for 8 years since she graduated. She has the potential to be a model but she rather gives up on her dream and chose to be a teacher in this school. What kind of reason that made her to stay in this school?
“Mari-chan~~”
A girl in school uniform is running towards her energetically. Mariko smirked and secretly took a quick look at the running girl. She is pretending to ignore the girl and enjoying her juice. As the other girl call out her name more louder, her smile becomes wider. The girl stopped in front of her, painting. She snatched the juice from her hand and glaring at her. She drank the juice till the last drop and squeezed the box while looking at Mariko with a pair of murderous eyes. Mariko simply smiled at this girl’s childish acts.
“Don’t you hear me calling you?” the girl is angry at Mariko.
“You are late, Matsui Jurina” Mariko said as she looks at her watch.
Jurina is mad and throws her school bag at Mariko. Mariko dodges and stands up, walking to the girl. She stopped next to her and took out a pack of chocolate, the girl’s favorite food. Without saying a word, she is just swaying the chocolate in front of the girl. Jurina immediately grabbed the chocolate and glaring at Mariko, “You are forgiven”
Within five seconds, Jurina regretted and took back what she just said because what Mariko gave her is only a pack of chocolate, an empty pack of chocolate… a pack of chocolate without chocolate inside… Mariko laughed at the girl’s expression and whisper “Baka” beside her ear. Jurina tighten her fist and launched it towards Mariko.
Mariko managed to grab Jurina’s hand and put it behind her back. She put the other hand around Jurina’s neck and gently pulled her closer, hugging her from behind, resting her head on the girl’s shoulder. Jurina blushed as she feels Mariko’s warm breath on her neck. They paused like that, not wanting to move. Mariko closed her eyes and smiled as she recalled how they met for the first time, even though Jurina doesn’t remember it. But this is the reason… the reason why Mariko devoted her youth to this school until now… the reason is you… Matsui Jurina…
There’s the beginning, love between 26 years old teacher and 15 years old student… not only a matter of age and forbidden rules against public views, it’s unlimited love through the time.
Flashback
=========
Year 2012
=========
My name is Shinoda Mariko, I was in my rebellious age at 15, as I become a high school student. At the school opening ceremony, I was chosen to be the representative for first year student. I am known as best grade-well mannered student, not because I want to, it’s because I am told to. I have to keep my image and attitude when I am in school. My mother got into accident and failed to reach her dream, to become a pianist. Because of that, my mother put her dream on me. She sees me as her substitute, she wants me to success her dream. What else can I do? She is my mother, I can’t fight her… I can only be obedient and follow her wish. But inside, I am a rebellious kid.
Without them knowing, I cut my hair short and wearing a wig to cover it. I don’t like long hair but my mother likes it, long hair makes me look elegant. I often sneak out in the middle of the night and come back home before six. Why I’m doing this? Because this is fun, it gets me excited and release some stress. In the first year of school I already made up many trouble, not to mention got into fight. Thanks to my genius brain, I can always have someone to cover it and no one knows it was all my works.
Scratching principle’s chair with pocketknife, setting trap in washroom for teacher, messing with the food in school’s canteen like put in many spicy and random ingredients without the chef knowing, this has made all the people who ate the food been hospitalized. It’s great because we got free from school for three days. When I forgot to study for the exam, it’s simple… I sneaked into teacher’s office and switched the answer sheets envelopes with porn magazine inside. That sure made a huge blow and that ‘not-knowing-what-happened’ teacher got fired.
Why I’m doing that? Bored, tired, annoyed. I really don’t like playing piano. What’s with that elegant posture, stoic face, and annoying classical music. What I really like is pop music and photographing. I want to be a model, I want to try various kinds of clothes, I want to be in front of camera, I want to express my emotion in many ways, not to wear a kind, warm, polite poker face in front of everyone.
Tonight I sneaked out from home again after my parents were asleep. As usual, I put off my wig, wearing a hat and put on leather jacket which makes me look like an adult, plus my height is taller than usual kid in my age. I can get into the pub without gets suspicious. On the way to the pub, there’s a person around my height crying under the tree on the side road. Don’t know why, I can’t ignore her. I want to just pass by but ended up walking to her side.
“Oi, Baba (old hag). Why are you crying?” I said in bad manner.
“Who do you call baba?! I am only 15 years old!” she shouted at me while she is still crying.
She is in my age? It’s rare to meet someone as tall as me. But why is she crying? I lift my head to see a kite hanging on the branch. “Are you crying because of that?” I pointed the kite.
She looked down and nodded.
“Good luck” I said as I walked pass her.
She grabbed my sleeve to stop me from walking, “Aren’t you gonna help me?”
“Why should I?” I said with emotionless face.
“How could you leave a troubled girl in the middle of the night and didn’t help her after knowing what troubled her?” she looked at me straight into my eyes. Somehow it’s like she is breaking my wall of ice, the wall I put to border myself from people.
I smiled politely at her, the same smile I wear when I’m in school, “I doubt I can help you”
I reluctantly raise my hands and wave it in the air, “My hands can’t reach the kite, I’m sorry”
I bowed politely and turned to leave but she grabbed my sleeve again, I pushed her away and she starts clinging on my arms, never let me go and that annoyed me, “I already act politely to you, I said I can’t reach the kite, what do you want?!”
“You can’t reach the kite but we can!!” she shouted at me.
Five minutes later, I ended up having her sitting on my shoulder. As she said, I can’t reach the kite but WE can reach it. Why am I lose to her in jankenpon, does she know that she is heavy?
“Are you reached it yet?” I growled.
“Just a little… hey, don’t move. I almost get iiiiiiiittttttttttttt”
BUUUKKK
I can’t hold her weight anymore and ended up falling to the ground. I was about to scold her but all of my words lost in the air when I see her smile. Her smile shows me how satisfy she gets her kite back. It’s just a kite, why is she cares so much? Is there something else with the kite? I keep silent and watching her checking her kite. As expected, she touched some part of it and there’s a small device like coin pop out. Before she gets it, I snatched the coin with high speed.
“Hey, give it to me!!” she reached out her hands to snatch the silver coin from me.
“It’s just a coin, why are you worrying so much?”
“It’s not just a coin! It is a–” she paused there and pressed her mouth like she said something forbidden to know.
BIIP BIIIIIP BIIIIIIIPPPPPP
I turned my head to saw a big truck is moving toward us with high speed. I forgot that we’re in the middle of the street. With the speed of this truck it’s impossible for me to dodge. Fear overwhelmed my body and made me freeze there, all I can do is close my eyes and wait for the trucks to crash me. To think about it, this is not too bad at least I can be free… free from the border around me and started a new life.
“Don’t move!”
I heard that girl’s voice. I can feel that she is holding my hands and I can hear a click and feel something shines before me. The truck must be a few steps in front of me. I wait and wait, but the pain never hit me. I opened one eye to check on my surrounding. It was weird that nothing happened. It was quiet and silent. The only thing happened is that girl is holding my hands. I was about to ask her but she put her finger on my lips, prevent me to say anything.
“Let’s move to the side road first, I’ll explain to you what happened” she holds my hand and guide me to the side of the road. Just when we reach the side, there’s a truck coming and passed by. I was jaw dropped to know what was happened.
“That is the same truck from before, I remember its plat” I shocked.
“Yes, that is the truck from a minute before. This…” she took the silver coin from me, “This is one of my experiment, a time travelling machine. Whoever holding this when it active will travelling within time”
“What is that?” I pointed something behind her. As she turned back, I snatched the coin from her.
“Hey, give me back!!” she shouted.
“Did you steal this from somewhere? I’ll report you to police”
“No no no no no no” she pleaded, “You people from this age can’t know about this. It’ll have impact to the future”
“Future?” I asked.
“Well…” she withdraw her hands from me and explain to me more detail, “My name is Matsui Jurina, I come from the year of 2023. I am here to get some extinct herbs to the future. There’s a terrible disease spreads in my hometown and the scientist are having hard time to find the cure. Recently, I read an old article in library and found a description similar with the disease but the herbs that used are extinct in my year. So that, I am here to find them”
“Have you found the herb?”
“Not yet…”
“If you don’t mind…” my grinned grow wider when she is looking at me with shimmering eyes, hoping that I will help her finding the herbs but I’m sorry, my answer will disappoint you, “Let me use this for a while~”
----------------------
The next day
As usual, I wake up and prepare myself to school, taking the same route to school. I can’t stop myself from laughing as I remember what happened yesterday. About that girl I met yesterday night… I tricked her and left her in the crowded pub, prevent her from following me to my house. I took the coin from my pocket and look at it then something flashes in my head. Facepalmed for myself, I forgot to ask her how to operate this thing!!! Suddenly, I feel someone tapped my shoulder. That innocence smile and face… Matsui Jurina?! How did she manage to follow me?
“Give it back to me” she ordered.
“No, not until you teach me how to use this” I replied.
“Okay then” she stopped in front of me with a big grin, “I’ll pestering you until you return it to me”
=============
In the school
“Stop clinging on me! It’ll ruin my image!”
“Who cares~~” she said playfully, ignoring the eyes of people around us.
I can hear people said rumors about me and it spreading fast in the school. The usual calm and noble-like student is now being lovey dovey with an unknown girl. I don’t know how she gets my information and how she stole my school uniform and makes some false information to enter this school. The main problem is she claimed herself as my cousin and went all clinging at me in school. How can she ruin my mighty image like trash.
“Mari-chan~~ feed me~” she opened her mouth, waiting for me to feed her lunch.
This attracts many eyes on me, whispering something weird and disgusting about me. Our model student is being weird, is she gay? Who is that girl with her? Her girlfriend? Eww, that’s disgusting. How could she act all lovey dovey in school. Get out of my sight, that makes me sick.
“Enough!” I yelled and went out from the canteen.
Great, I lose my cool. I showed them my annoyed face. I’ll get scold at home later. I ruin my day… I ran to the school backyard, finding some fresh air to keep me calm. This is the place I like the most. I always come to sit on the bench under this big tree whenever I was upset. The green field and the shimmering sunlight with gentle wind breezing through the leaves give me the calm I need the most. This is the only place I can relax myself.
That girl is still following me, staying beside me. I am mad… but not to her. I hate this feeling… I want to yell at her but my words lost in the air when I saw her smiling face. I want to beat her but my hands are opposing my will. I want to be kind to her but my pride won’t let it. Maybe I shouldn’t get into this trouble. All of this begins because of this stupid coin.
“Take it” I handed the coin to her, “Get out of my sight immediately”
“You let me go?” she asked.
I stayed silence and closed my eyes, ignoring her.
“I changed my mind” I can feel she come closer to me and whispering beside my ears, “I won’t go until you help me find the herbs I need”
My eyes widen as I heard what she just said. Her grin becomes wider when she saw my shocked expression, “I’ll be counting on you, Mari-chan” she said as she wrapped her arms around me.
“Wow, wow, look what we got here” there’s a bunch of boys walking to our direction, “Being lovey dovey with your GIRLfriend in backyard? Are you doing something SECRET here? Hahahaha…” They are mocking at us.
Their faces make me wanna puke. I want to beat their face merciless but I have to hold myself, I can’t win against five of them. I hold Jurina’s hand and gonna leave but they stopped in front of us and put on some annoying face. One of them grabbed my wrist and pulling me into his embrace, “Why don’t you accompany us for a while?”
I stepped his foot and launched my knees on his stomach and sent an upper punch toward his chin, sending him to the ground. The fight between two girls and five boys started. Unexpectedly, Jurina is great at fighting. Her boxing fighting style is fast and strong. No matter how strong we are, they’re still stronger than us. After fighting for some minutes, three of them attack against Jurina, one of them is picking up a branch and launched it behind Jurina. I ran to block the branch with my right hands. The branch broke in two and my hand is bleeding. I bear the pain and put my usual poker face as it didn’t hurt at all.
“This is what you got? Can’t you beat me harder? This is how you should do” I grabbed the left branch in his hand and hit it on my own head. The branch broke in two as my head is bleeding.
“She is crazy. Let’s go!” Those guys ran away.
“Wow, you’re so cool~!” Jurina said as she starts clinging on me again. She hugged me and rubbing her cheek against mine.
“Get away from me, you are dirty” I tried to push her away but actually I’m enjoying it. “Your hands are full with mud, get away”
“Mari-chan~ I’m so gay for you~” she said and tried to kiss my cheek.
I struggled from her and tripled at my own legs, ended up falling on the ground with her still clinging on me. The sunlight shines behind her back makes her smile shining bright. My heart skipped a beat whenever I saw her smile like that. She moved and lay down next to me, reaching her hands to the sky, “The sky is so blue and wide” she turned to face me for a second and turned away. In flash of that moment, I swear I can see her blush.
All of the sudden, she sat up with her eyes widen, like she saw something. I asked her what’s wrong, she just smiled and told me it’s time to go home. She will send me home and explain to my parents why I got into fight. When we got in my home, she explains that I got into fight because I want to save her from the guys harassing her. My mother is in tears when she saw my wounded arms. She is crying and said that my dream is ruined… my future is ruined, with the wounded hand, it’s impossible for me to play piano again. The truth is I am relieved to have wounded in hand, so that I can have an excuse to finish this stupid dream my mother put on me. But seeing how broken is she, I can’t bear to tell her the truth that I don’t want to be a pianist.
---------------------------------
My moms let Jurina sleepover tonight due to her wounds and Jurina lied that her parents aren’t at home, that makes my mom more insisted to let her stay. After having dinner, we get into my room and that’s the time when we have to separate.
“I have to go home now” she said all of the sudden.
“What did you say? You haven’t found the herbs, do you?” I was panicked a bit.
“I found it” she smiled, “After the fight, I saw those herbs in the glasshouse at your school backyard. You’re my lucky star, if I didn’t meet you maybe I won’t find these herbs in such a short time. Thank you”
Anger filled in my body again. It’s good thing that she found the herbs but... why am I mas about it? “Get lost now” I commanded. I didn’t mean to be rude at her but I just can’t help it. Those words slipped from my mouth.
She is smiling like nothing happened and pulled me into a hug, “It’s nice to meet you here”
My tears burst out suddenly and I can’t stop it. When she was about to let go, I hugged back, I hold her in my embrace tightly, don’t want to let her see my crying face. She patted my head and pulled back to face me. Her thumb gently wiped my tears, “When a girl learns to love, she cries”
I turned my face away from her and pushed her hands away from me but she cupped my face, makes me look straight into her eyes. “Maybe I am not even born in this year, maybe I will remember nothing about you but… please find me. Find me and love me”
I can hear a click and a light soon filled my room, force me to close my eyes. When I opened my eyes, Jurina has disappeared.
========
Year 2015
========
Three years passed after that unforgettable incident, I am now 18 years old in my third year of high school. Everyday goes in routine as always. Since I don’t have to play piano again, I work hard to gather many information about modeling. I decided to pursue my dream to be a model after graduation. But things always mess up with me.
“I’m going” I said as I leave to school.
Today is a bit noisy in the earlier morning. A truck parked beside my house, people are moving furniture and boxes, seems like I’m gonna have new neighbor today. As I walked pass, I saw a girl is crying under the tree. Somehow this scene reminds me for someone. That little girl turned her head and saw me then she cried even harder. I was panicked a bit and went to calm her down.
“Little girl, how old are you?” I asked.
She sobs and answers, “Seven” while showing a peace sign with right hand and five with left hand.
I laughed a bit at it, “So, why are you crying?”
She pointed up to the tree, “My kite”
My eyes widen as I remember exactly the memories in my past, “Kid, what’s your name?”
“Jurina, Matsui Jurina”
Flashback End
==============
Back to year 2023
==============
Because of you, I gave up my dream and became teacher in this school. After teaching at school, I take part time job to become your private tutor and guide you to be a student in my old school to prevent you becoming a scientist. You can say I am selfish but this is my love to you. I don’t care if you seeing me as a big sister, I will always love you. Years after years passed by, we are getting more closer like real siblings. Everyone will only see me as a big sister who takes care of you. Then one day, in the evening of this fall… you confessed to me…
“I love you, I see you not only as my big sister. I know the gap between our ages, I know we’re both girls, I know it’s forbidden but… I just want you to know how I feel… I just want to say I love you!”
I am so glad you said that. I am waiting for 11 years to hear that. You can’t imagine how happy I am.
---------------------------------------
Back to the school backyard
“Ne, Mari-chan. What are you smiling at?” Jurina asked.
Mariko let go of her and went to grab her belonging, “It’s late now, let’s go home”
“Mari-chan” Jurina hold Mariko’s hand and stopped walking, “Can I kiss you?”
“No” Mariko answered, “You’re still 15”
“Mou~” Jurina pouted, “Three more years to wait…” she sighed.
Without warning, Mariko leaned in and gave her a light peck on lips. Jurina surprised and place a light punch at Mariko, “Mou, you said no kiss!”
“I said you can’t kiss me but I can~ because I’m already 26” Mariko said playfully.
“That’s not fair!!! Let me kiss you” Jurina went to chase after Mariko.
“Not until you are 18” Mariko giggled.
This love is unlimited love. No border of age, gender, nor the time space… I will always love you… with this unlimited love…
-
Entry #15
Title: Tomo & Taka & the Caterpillar Incident
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takahashi Minami, Itano Tomomi; TakaTomo
Word Count: 2,432
Tomo & Taka & the Caterpillar Incident
120912 K6 「RESET」
Like any other day, today there is AKB stage performance at Akihabara. As we all know, the stage performance is done in rotation meaning today Team A, tomorrow Team K and the next day Team B and so on. And today it’s Team K’s turn.
At the backstage or the dressing room, you can see Team K members inside. Since it is still early, members are either eating snacks, chatting, blogging, playing around, putting on makeup, etc.
BANG! With a loud thump made from slamming the door, Miyazawa Sae, Genking of AKB, succeeds in making a flashy appearance.
“Ohayo…. Ouch! Why did you hit my head, Sayaka!!” pouts Sae
“How many times do I have to tell you to stop slamming the door!!!” says Akimoto Sayaka, Team K captain, angrily.
“Hehe… I just forget things” Sae replies while sticking her tongue out.
Sayaka sighs as her best friend never remember about opening the door gently…
Well, it’s another cheerful day here at Akihabara Theater~
Near the corner of the room you can see a girl with beautiful brown hair and wearing stylish clothes, as she smiles you can even see her cute canine! Yes, she is Itano Tomomi, the fashion queen in AKB, and at the moment she is reading a fashion magazine.
“Yaho~~ What are you doing there at the corner??” asks Sae
“As you can see, I’m reading a magazine” replies Tomochin but her eyes are still on the pages.
“Oh! So what’s the trend recently??? I need to be prepared as the AKBINGO! Fashion collection is coming again and this time I’ll for sure get rid of the name BUSU!!!” says Sae all fired up.
“Hahaha~ Is that the latest joke this week?” asks Tomochin while laughing
“Tomo… TT^TT How can you say that?! I’m totally serious about it!!”
“That’s what you always say but the results are always BUSU isn’t it??”
“Whatever! This time it will be Mote for sure!!! Anyway, the topic for the MC today is ‘insect’. I’ll go have some banana from Sayaka first to refill my energy bar”
Sae then went to Sayaka who is busy eating bananas.
“Hm… speaking of insect I hate caterpillar the most. Is there anything to talk about caterpillar?” Tomochin questions herself while trying to recollect any possible topic to talk about later.
“Ah! Speaking of caterpillar, there is that incident….” Tomochin utters as her mind flies back to her memories while smiling sweetly….
===============================================
Back then…
“Ne, ne, ne Takamina~~” Tomochin calls while flipping the pages of a fashion magazine although all her attention is on the girl called Takamina.
“Hmm??” answers Takamina or Takahashi Minami, a 148cm tall girl with a big ribbon on top of her head, but not removing her eyes from the One Piece manga.
“Do you know what day is today??” Tomochin asks calmly while closing the pages of the magazine but actually she is kind of excited about what Takamina’s reply will be.
“Today??” Takamina repeats as she slowly turns her attention away from the manga she was reading awhile ago.
“Yea” Tomochin replies as she plays with her beautiful long hair.
“Hmm… By the way, what is the date today??”
“Today is July 3rd”
“Hrm…. AH!!! Today is the releasing date of the newest volume of One Piece!!!” exclaims Takamina excitedly as she stands up from her chair.
“Thanks for reminding me, Tomo! I almost forgot about something so important as this!!! If I forgot to buy the volume this week then I’ll regret forever!!!” cries Takamina animatedly while she grabs onto Tomochin’s hand and look at Tomochin gratefully.
Takamina kept on telling of how grateful she felt towards Tomochin while failing to notice the darkened face of the fashion queen.
With one swift action, Tomochin manages to remove her hands from Takamina’s and gave her a cold “Hmph!” then walks toward the exit while closing or rather crashing the door hardly with a loud BANG! Leaving our poor captain dumbfounded as she stares at the door.
“What’s wrong with her?? Did her monthly period came??” was the only thing that came to Takamina’s mind…
On the other hand, after leaving our captain Tomochin went back directly to her home and inside her bedroom.
“Bakamina! Stupid Minami!! Shorty!! A man!!! Acchan, Haruna, Miichan, Yuko, Mariko, …. all did gave me a present and you!!! Not only didn’t gave me any present but also has forgotten my birthday!!!” Tomochin who always have a calm and cool image is now totally give herself an image change this moment as black aura spreads inside the room.
What is the reason for our calm and fashionable queen to lose her temper?? What did Takamina do that causes all these curses from Tomochin?? I’m sure if you’re truly an AKB fan, you would’ve figure out the reason already by this moment or even earlier right??
Yes! The reason why Tomochin lost her temper was because our dearest captain has fail to remember that today, July 3rd, is our queen’s birthday!!! How could she have forgotten that??? As they have known each other for so many years!!! Ahem! I’ve gotten a bit out of control so let’s bring the story back to Tomochin…
Tomochin’s bedroom…
“Bakamina! Bakamina!” says Tomochin with anger as she punches and kicks a doll with the height of 148cm and a big ribbon on top. She is now really showing all her skills she has learned back when they are shooting a drama called ‘Majisuka Gakuen’, she is totally in Shibuya mode at the moment.
Poor doll… I pity you but there is no one here who could stop Tomochin in her Shibuya mode. You can only blame why your height is 148cm and why do you have a ribbon on top.
Simultaneously at a barbeque shop, No3b are having Busu Kai (No3b’s gathering)
“Achoo!!!” Takamina sneezes.
“Takamina, are you okay??” asks Miichan while roasting a meat.
“I’m fine but I wonder why I suddenly sneezed. I just hope that I won’t catch a cold”
“Maybe someone is thinking about you at the moment” teases Haruna
“Naa~ Maybe someone is bad-mouthing about her LOL!” laughs Miichan
“Miichan!!!”
“Hahaha~~”
The Next Day
After waking up in the morning, our fashion queen is not satisfied with just punching a ‘Takamina-like’ doll to release her anger. So now she is thinking of a way to pay back to Takamina.
“Hmph! I should do something to that Bakamina!”
A few moments of thinking deeply, Tomochin seems to have thought of something.
“Ah~ Tomo has thought of a good idea~~~” Tomochin says to herself as she quickly get off the bed and turn on her computer.
“Hehehe~~” She laughs creepily like those witches you often see in fairy tales.
Once the computer is fully turned on, she immediately went to the Google Search and didn’t hesitate at all and input the word ‘caterpillar’ inside the search box. Then ENTER!
In the blink of an eye, hundreds and thousands of pictures pop up in her computer which frightened herself out.
“Ewww!!!! That’s why I hate caterpillars!!! Look at those creepy legs and asdlfjaei” As she is totally freaked out, which is why the words coming out from her mouth are not interpretable at the back…
After fighting with her inner conscience, Tomochin manages to get a few caterpillar images inside her phone.
“Hehehe~” Tomochin giggles as she attaches the images inside a message with the sentence ‘Bakamina is as disgusting as the caterpillar!!!’ then she input Takamina’s e-mail address and press the ‘SEND’ button.
“Send~~ Hmph! This is what you get for forgetting my birthday, Bakamina!”
Ring~ Ring~ a message is received in Takamina’s mobile.
“Hm? A message from Tomochin to Takamina? I wonder what it is about~ Since Takamina is at the bathroom now, I as her best friend have the responsibility to check the message for her~ It could have been an emergency message~” says Miichan with a sneaky smile on her face.
After the gathering yesterday, Miichan decided to have a sleepover at Takamina’s place. Since it is close to the working place tomorrow besides it is just nice to have Takamina preparing the food for her, the bathing water, drying her hair and waking her up in the morning. All in all, Miichan decides that it is best to have a sleepover yesterday and that’s why Miichan is here sneakily reading the message now.
“Hmm.. No subject. It makes me even more curious about the content” Miichan utters to herself as she click on the message.
Miichan who always knows to make the right decision and calculation, didn’t know that this will be one of the decision she regrets all her life…
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Miichan screams with all her might as her face turns pale while she tosses Takamina’s phone away.
“What happened?! Is there a robber? Cockroach??” Takamina rushes out of the bathroom as she heard Miichan screaming.
“Ca…” was the only thing that came out of Miichan’s mouth as her teeth are still shaking from the shock she has received.
“Ca?” Takamina asks confusedly while looking worriedly at Miichan.
“There.. was so.. many ca.. caterpillars inside your phone!!”
“Eh?! Caterpillars inside my phone?!” exclaimed Takamina as she hurriedly look around the room for her phone and saw her poor phone lying on the floor.
As Takamina glimpse on the screen on her phone she manages to get some information from it: Firstly, was that the message was from Tomochin. Secondly, there weren’t any caterpillars inside her phone but that there were lots of caterpillar images attached in the message. Lastly, she doesn’t know what she did to deserve a message ‘Bakamina is as disgusting as the caterpillar!’ from Tomochin.
“What did you do that pissed Tomo off??” asks Miichan who has obviously calmed down from the caterpillar shock awhile ago.
“I don’t know… she’s pissed since yesterday” replies Takamina who apparently still doesn’t know what mistakes she made.
“You mean Tomochin is pissed ever since yesterday?”
“Yea…” Takamina responds sadly as she is totally clueless about what’s going on.
“Ne, Takamina… Did you remember what day is yesterday?” Miichan questioned as she kind of know what might be the possible reason for this childish prank from Tomochin.
“Yesterday?? One Piece’s releasing date, of course! Why did you ask the same question that Tomo asked me yesterday?”
After hearing Takamina’s answer, Miichan facepalmed herself and wants to murder this stupid captain in front of her.
Detective Mii has now solved the case!
“Cough* Cough*” Detective Mii clears her throat as she is preparing to give Takamina a good scolding.
“YESTERDAY WAS TOMOCHIN’S BIRTHDAY! And YOU have definitely forgotten about it which is why Tomochin was mad and send this caterpillar message to you! What’s inside your brain aside from shounen manga??!! How can you forget Tomochin’s birthday?? You better apologize to her.”
“Oh shoot!!! You’re right! Yesterday was Tomochin’s birthday! How could I have not remembered about it! Oh… now I’m feeling so guilty about it… I guess I’ll go apologize now in person, see ya later Miichan! And thanks!” Takamina dashes out of the room not realizing that she’s wearing a pink and funny T-shirt with rainbow tight pants… and because she was in a rush, she wore a pair of worn-out slippers… (The reason why Takamina was wearing on such a ridiculous matching was because when she hear Miichan screaming she just put on whatever clothes she finds at the moment and didn’t realize how absurd and silly she was looking.)
In front of Tomochin’s house…
Ding Dong~ Ding Dong~
“Yes, who’s there?” Tomochin replies as she opens the door and see our stupid captain with her ridiculous outfit.
“Er.. Tomo.. I’m here now.. er.. because.. yesterday…” Takamina stutters as she was nervous in how she should ask for forgiveness from Tomochin. She is now regretting that she acts before she thinks! She should’ve thought of what to do first rather than rushing here with a blank mind.
“Pfft!” Tomochin burst out laughing as she can’t keep her laughter inside anymore. Why? Because of Takamina’s silly outfit with her expression right now is just a great combination to become a joker.
“Eh?”
“Hahaha!!! Takamina, are you serious?!!”
“Huh??”
“Did you really come all the way to my home in this outfit??” Tomochin chuckles while holding on to her stomach leaving our captain with her famous failed expression.
“EH!!! I didn’t realize it at all!! I.. I was in a rush…” Takamina’s face has turns apple red as she now understand the reason why Tomo is laughing out loud now.
“Why were.. you.. haha.. in a rush??” Tomochin asks while breathing heavily as she was out of breathe at this instant.
“Well… because… after receiving your message in the morning, Miichan told me that it was your birthday yesterday and I felt totally bad that I forgot about your birthday so I decide to come and apologize in person but it seems that I have failed again…” Takamina told Tomochin the purpose of her coming here as she pouts.
“I’ll forgive you this time, seeing that you have given me a good laugh just now. But remember only this time! If you fail to remember my birthday again next time then.. hehehe… You know what I mean” Tomochin states as you can faintly see a devil-like tail wriggling at the back of Tomo.
“Gulp* I promise I won’t ever forget your birthday again, I swear.” Takamina assures Tomochin with her serious face which causes Tomochin to blush a bit with Takamina staring at her like that.
“Bakamina!” Tomochin shouts to hide her embarrassment and went back to her house leaving a puzzled Takamina outside.
“Eh?!!!”
==========================================================
Present…
“Tomo, it’s time for the Enjin (円陣) now!” says Sayaka
“Coming~” Tomochin replies and run towards the rest of Team K members.
“チームK いくぞー!”
“じゃん じゃん じゃん RESET!”
After the Enjin, Team K members left off to the stage and start their usual stage performance. And now is the MC time and the topic is about insect.
“Don’t think of me as weird person. But when I usually have free time I will go to Google and search for the caterpillars’ pictures. I show it to members like Takamina, when she got me pissed off. Last time, when I know that Takamina forgot about my birthday I was really mad so the next day I send her lots of caterpillar pictures….”
-
Entry #16
Title: Welcome Home
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Gekikara, Yuko, Shibuya, Dance, Black, Torigoya, Sado
Word Count: 3,195
Welcome Home
My name is Gekikara, no that's my nickname. My real name is Matsui Rena. They call me Gekikara because I like spicy food. I lost my parents since kindergarten, it's my grandma raise me up. My grandma works hard to earn living fees and my school fees. She said all I need to do is get good grade and went to Tokyo University. She wants me to live a proper life like the other people. I study hard and always get good marks, I love seeing my grandma's smile. That's the best thing in my life, the second is my grandma's handmade spicy crackers. I like it so much.
Good things won't last long. It happened on the day before the opening ceremony in my first day entering high school. My grandma found dead on the street, police said they believe my grandma has been robbed by gangsters and beat to dead. I was so blank hearing that statement. I can't believe the fact that I was left behind alone in this house. I locked myself in my room, don't want to go out. I covered all the windows in my room, let the darkness filled in and doing nothing. I stayed there for three days without food and drink.
One day, my uncle came to pick me. When he stepped into my room and saw me in terrible state as my hair is messy, my pale skin, dark circle below my eyes and I lost my weight which makes me like I become crazy. My uncle didn't dare to adopt me and sent me to orphanage. He even transferred me from elite school to yankee school. That's how I become member of Majisuka Gakuen.
I was still a weakling normal girl. I am afraid when I step into this school. Students here are all scary. Their face, their hairstyle, their make up, their accessories, their weapon, all the wall painting and the classroom is too much different from my old school. None of them is listening while the teacher is teaching. I am the only one who brings books and study like a normal student will do. Not to mention, they always picking at me and forcefully taking my money everyday. When I have no money, they will beat me.
Day after day, the orphanage dropped me out because they say I will bring bad impact to the other children. They think I am a yankee and always picking fight in school. The truth is I am a victim of that school but no one will believe me. I am no longer the elite student everyone respects. I have no where to go and decided to sleepover at school. It's really creepy at night. No power supplement, it's all dark here. I climbed the stairs and went to my classroom. I arranged the table to the side near the window, forming them like a bed and sleep on it. When I was about to sleep, I heard someone's steps come closer. I was too afraid and fall to the ground. Without me notice, a hand tapped on my shoulder sending a goosebumps all over my body.
"AAARGHHHHHHHH, Stay away from me!" as reflect, I sway my hands randomly and hit something.
"Itaiii..."
I look over my shoulder and saw a creepy figure with her nose bleeding and her teeth is sharp like wolf. "GHOOOOSSSSST!!!" I scream out loud from my lungs and fainted.
-----------------------------------
When I woke up, I was on someone's back. This person is piggybacking me but seems like she is shorter than me because my feet almost touch the ground.
"You awake?" asked this person. I nodded as reply.
"What are you doing there?" I asked, remembering the scary face she has.
"That's my question. What are you doing there?"
"I-I... Umm..." I can't say that I have no home and have to sleep in classroom.
"Here we are~" she gently put me down and knocked the door. I looked around and realized this is in school building. There's a mark on the wall saying "Rapappa Club"
As she opened the door, she pushed me in, "Tadaima~"
"O-ka-e-ri~" a beautiful brunette stood there in front of us and greeted us kindly.
"Who is she?" a sudden voice appeared behind me, makes me freak out. I turned back and saw a raven haired girl glancing at me with cold eyes.
"Weakling" another person who sat on the chair is looking at me from head to toe.
"Yuko-san, who is she?" a short haired girl in fur jacket walk in from another door inside this room. So this short girl who carried me named Yuko.
Yuko walked to the middle of this room and cleared her throat, "I officially announce to take her in as member of Rapappa!"
"No way! We can't have such weakling in our club"
"Shibuya, listen to Yuko-san's explanation first" that short-haired girl shot a fierce glance at her.
Yuko claps her hands and continue, "Who said she is weak? She has strong brain" Yuko pointed her head, "She is sure can be a great help in exam~ I don't want to be punished to wash toilet every weekend"
-----------------------------
Well, that's how I became member of this Rapappa Club. Since that day, no one dare to mess with me because Yuko-san always visits me in break time. Plus, Rapappa Club room in now the place where I called home. That is the place I sleep everyday. Although everytime I clean the room and make it tidy, it always becomes a mess in no more than five minutes.
Yuko-san always bringing some snacks and shares it in this room. She is busy telling us what happened that day, with who she fight, she talks while eating the snacks which make the carpet and the floor dirty. Shibuya-san always bringing her nail-polish equipment and one of her loyal servant, Dance. She will punches Dance-san whenever she likes and her blood scatter around, splat on the floor. I have to clean it again at night. Black-san's incredible speed will make the paper or things fall to the ground when she passed by and I have to put it back to the right place.
Torigoya-san is such an airhead, she always forget what she is doing. Sometimes she took Sado-san's toy and confused what she took it for? Then put it on the ground, she went to take some snack, before she ate it, she gazed at the snack and threw it on the ground. She is just wandering in the room like stranger. Sado-san is usually standing at the corner, sleeping in standing position and does nothing but observing the others. But when she is in her bad mood, vases, chairs, and other thing in this room were broken into pieces. Rather than a member of mighty Rapappa, I think I am only their housekeeper, cleaning this headquarter after they left. But I enjoy it, rather than being alone, I like this place the most.
It's been months since I live here. The leaves outside are turning gold, summer holiday is about to end. I was thinking about making some special cooking for them when they back to school. With the money I earn from part-time job within summer, I went to the nearer store to buy some ingredients. Was it my bad luck or what, I run into Yabakune gangs. Yabakune is Rapappa swore enemy. Since I can't fight, the only way for me is run but it seems impossible because they already surrounded me in circle.
I throw my ingredients to the person in front of me and dashed forward to escape. When I was about to escape from this circle, someone dragged me in and begins to beat me. I was thrown to the ground as they continue beating me. I heard them whisper that I was doing some good shopping and they pick up a sack of salt which I brought just now. I saw one of them ripped open the sack and pour the salt on my wound. I scream out loud as the pain burn my wounds. Another person is raising her metal stick up high and swaying it at me. Before it hit me, I saw an arm went between and hold the stick. It was Yuko-san, she is grinning proudly as usual.
"How dare you lay a hand on my friend!" She kicked that person at stomach and dashed forward for another attack. Some of them turned away from me and went to attack Yuko-san. Without warning, another bat comes to hit me. Sado-san managed to stand in front of me and got hit on her head, forming a scar above her eyebrow. I gasped to see the blood coming out from the wound. She wiped her blood and sending the death glare to Yabakune before join the fight with Yuko.
"What are you doing there? Stay aside!" Shibuya rushed in and knocked down a girl with a single blow with her knuckle.
Suddenly I feel wind passed by and within second, Black and Torigoya are standing beside me. Back facing me, Black turned her head a bit and ordered Torigoya to take care of me, "I'll take care of them, you take Geki out of here"
"Please follow me, Geki-chan" Torigoya said sweetly as ever.
There in front of us, a sudden black shadow covering the place like mist then all the Yabakune members around us are fallen to the ground. Torigoya wrapped her arms around mine and guide me out of this circle. Both of us were sitting on the side, watching them fighting Yabakune members. Torigoya took out a snack from my shopping plastic bag and eating it. Rapappa is sure the strongest yankee student in this area. Should I learn how to fight?
----------------------------------------------------
Under the bridge somewhere in the city
I feel guilty seeing wounds all over their face and arms. They got wounds because of me, if only I can fight... they shouldn't be like this.
"Itai tai tai taiii..." Yuko complained when Torigoya rubbed the cotton bud on her wound.
Sado went to took over Torigoya's place and told her to take care on Black's wounds. Torigoya do the same to Black but there's no reaction from her. I can see Torigoya is smiling and pressed harder on Black's wound. Suddenly there's a loud thud from nowhere, when Black walked away, blood coming down from Torigoya's nose and she fainted after seeing her own blood. As usual, Shibuya will be accompanied by her loyal servant, Dance-san. The funny thing is everytime Dance tried to take care of Shibuya's wound, she will get a smack from Shibuya. Poor Dance-san...
"It's because of you, we got beaten like this. Usually they can't lay a finger on us" Shibuya mad at me.
"You can't blame her, Shibuya" Yuko-san defended me, "We are just being unlucky today"
"I don't like you defending her" Shibuya pissed.
I'm too lucky to be in this school, to be in this club. Yuko-san really takes good care of me. Although Shibuya-san always picking mouth at me, but she never harms me. Black-san and Sado-san always watching me from afar and Torigoya-san always accompany me and talking with me, though sometimes I don't understand what she said.
"There you are!" A voice coming from behind us, revealing bunches of Yankees walking toward us.
"You can't escape now!" Another voice coming from the opposite direction. We are now being trapped by Yabakune armies in the tunnel under the bridge. All of them were 50 people or more, each of them were holding weapon.
"How many can you handle?" Yuko asked.
Shibuya is wearing her fighting gloves and smirked, "10"
"More than 10" Black added.
"Okay, 20 of them are mine. Sado, you take care the rest" Yuko ordered them then she turned back and winked at me, "Geki, Tori, and Dance, you can just stay there and grabbing some popcorn to eat"
"CHARGE!" Yabakune armies are starting to attack against Rapappa.
I was too busy to do nothing and stayed there like a statue, watching this completely chaos scene. Yuko-san is fighting like monster. She is fighting so many people and didn't get hurt at all. Sado-san is really sadist as her nickname, she beats all of them who stand in her way without holding back. She even snatched enemy's weapon and hit them merciless. Shibuya-san looks like she is throwing her temper at her enemy like she is punching a punching bag. Her speed is fast and deadly.
Within the time flows, half of Yabakune armies are fallen to the ground. Rapappa also getting tired, I wish I can help them but I am too weak.
"Geki! Run!" Yuko shouted at me.
I was panicked at that moment, don't know where to run. Two Yabakunes showed up with their weapons stand by in attack mode. One of them managed to hit me on my back, sending the pain through my bone. Another one in front of me is smirking at me and launched her bat toward me. There's a loud thud but I can feel no pain. Then I feel someone's body leaned against me. It was Yuko-sanﾅ she shield me with her body. I can see the blood coming down from her head. I called her name over and over again but she is not responding.
"Yuko!!" All of the members are calling Yuko-san. She is still unmoving in my embrace.
My heart hurts, my head hurts, my body is hot like there's fire spreading inside of me. My body is shivering not because of the pain, but it's because of my anger. I can feel blood pressure on my head, all of the sudden, I hear an evil voices echoing inside me. I am thirst of blood, I am longing to hear their pain. I can never control my body anymore and let them explode like a bomb. Every single person in my sight will taste the power of my fist. I won't stop until they cough of blood.
"Geki, enough!"
"They are retreating! Gekikara!"
"Gekikara! Stop!"
"Stop! She will die!"
My head fights back those voices and ignoring them. My hands won't let off from this person's neck, the more she is struggling, the more my hands going harder on her. There're many voices coming up and the flashlight spotted my face. I hate lights, I hate those lights fall on my face. I growled and rushes toward the light... then... all of the sudden, my mind went blank...
The next day I woke up and found myself sleeping behind the bar, in other words, I am being jailed. Yuko-san and Sado-san came to visit me and explained to me what happened. Yuko-san explained that she is only playing dead to force my fighting spirit out but ended up to be a mistake. I went berserk and unstoppable, I can't hear their voices calling me and beat up all Yabakunes brutally. Then the police appeared and I went to attack one of them, so I was sentenced to be in jail until the next semester.
"It's not your fault, Yuko-san. It's just me being uncontrollable." I smiled at her which makes her crying hard.
-------------------------------------------
Three months passed and next semester will be started in next week...
Jail is sure lonely and dark, having routine everyday, eat the same thing everyday, keep in the small area everyday, being watched by someone everyday, being alone everyday... I miss Rapappa, I miss cleaning Rapappa's headquarter, I miss being protected by Yuko-san, being scold by Shibuya-san, being airhead together with Torigoya, sneaking with Black-san, and dancing with Dance-san...
Fortunately, the officers release me a week earlier because they said I was doing well inside. They give me a ride to my uncle's house and dropped me outside of his apartment. After make sure the officers were gone, I start walking to my home, Rapappa's headquarter is the only place I named home. I was wondering what expression they'll have if they see me. Will Yuko-san cried over me? Will they scare to see me? Or will they ignore me? I can't imagine how will I live if the third probability becomes true.
Don't realize how long I walked, I arrived in front of Rapappa club. My hand is trembling to touch the door knob. Will this room becomes a mess without me, the housekeeper? I giggled at my own thought. I take a deep breath and repeated the word in my head which I want to say it for a long time. Taking another deep breath, I brave myself to open the door and say, "Tadaima (I'm home)"
"O-KA-E-RI~!"
I was surprised to hear them. My eyes widen as I see the room is filled with colorful balloons and ribbons, in the middle of the room there's a table and a cake on it. A huge banner is hanging at the windows, saying the word 'WELCOME HOME'. Yuko-san, Sado-san, Black-san, Torigoya-san, Shibuya-san, and Dance-san are smiling at me. Today I found the third thing I like the most in my life. I went back to outside and closed the door, then I re-opened the door and went in.
"Tadaima" I said with my biggest smile.
"OKAERIIIIII~!"
Welcome home is the warmest word in my life...
-
Entry #17
Title: Hope
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Bunker, Sudachi, Jovijovich, Annin, Nobunaga; NobuAnnin
Word Count: 1,300
Hope
- For how many days she still is in this mood? Asked Bunker.
- I don’t know… maybe two weeks? Answered a thinking Sudachi.
Two weeks, the time coincided with Nobunaga disappear and Paru coming to the prison taking her place. Since this, they leader Annin have been in a bad mood that they never have seeing before. Annin was not the type of person who talks too much so they was able to see her mood just by her attitude. She was angry and they didn’t know why, the only thing that they know was: with she in that mood be by her side was dangerous.
- Why she is so angry? Can be that Nobunaga disappear is the reason?
The entire team mongoose turned in direction of the voice and for they surprise was Jovijovich who said that. The girl rarely talks something in Japanese. The girls in the team starting to argue about if what she said was true but then they give up, after all, why Annin could be angry because Nobunaga disappeared? They was enemies, without Nobunaga, the things for them take the top of the prison was easy. Even after thinking a lot the team mongoose still didn’t found the reason and the solution to change they leader mood. Messhi sighed and stared the empty couch that Annin always sitting.
- I don’t know what is making her act in that way but whatever is we should just wait to she calm herself and try to not tease her with anything, after all if she is dangerous with us don’t giving her a reason, I can’t imagine how she will be if we give one to her.
All the team nodded they head agreeing with they comrade, the only thing that girls could do is wait and don’t do anything stupid.
———-//————-
When the Team Mongoose talked about they leader, Annin was walking in the prison, observing, searching. But again was useless, she didn’t find anything, no sign, even the team habu did not know how Nobunaga disappeared.
– They’re more useless than my own team. Thought, the team mongoose leader.
For two weeks she has been haunted by boredom and loneliness, since Nobunaga disappeared she feels that has lost something. She could not help but feel the boredom because since the start, when the team mongoose and team habu started to confront each other she never have been bored, maybe they can call her a masochist for like to fight with Nobunaga, but she don’t mind, she love it every time when she felt the punches of the other girl. Defeat the habu leader was a challenge and wanted to won.
But slowly something start to change, she just not wanted to fight with Nobunaga, she just wanted to see the girl, she start to make excuses to saw her, challenge for fights or without nobody notice, stare her from distance. But she loved more was the fights, so she was able to see Nobunaga stare her with that fiery glare and that smile. Without notice, she start to enjoy be with Nobunaga and feel lonely when was not able to see the girl, be searching for the haby leader, make Annin remember the day when the things changed, the day that make she and Nobunaga start to pretend fight for the top, when the they start to lie to they comrades just to have some time alone, when they turned into secret lovers.
——— // ———-
Nobunaga and Annin was fighting in the room of mongoose team, both of the girls was exhausted and with bruises and cuts over all they body, was almost the time to the prison gates close but the leaders of rival teams don’t minded with that. Annin just smiled and Nobunaga make the same, with her serious and sad tone Nobunaga start to talk.
- Why you’re doing this? Always challenge me to fights but you never seem to be fighting serious. What’s your real plan Annin?
The leader of mongoose became surprise, she was used to Nobunaga said something’s when they fight, but this make her surprise because the girl noticed her habit and even knowing that Annin challenge her again was not serious, she still accepted the challenge. The leader of mongoose looked the clock in the room, the gates was about to close in 50 seconds, she smiled and then approach of Nobunaga, that surprise by Annin action walked one step backwards, but after look in the mongoose leader she saw something that show that she not wanted to fight with her, curious Nobunaga stopped and just started to star Annin.
Foe her surprise the girl punched her, thinking that she fall in a trap Nobunaga turned to the girl ready to fight but then she felt something soft in her lips.
Annin kissed her, Nobunaga tried to push her but was useless, first was because of the fight, she didn’t have enough energy to push the girl, and the another reason was because she didn’t wanted break the kiss that now was a passionate kiss. When Annin pushed her to the couch in the room, the gates of the prison closed, understanding the girl plan, Nobunaga smiled.
- So that’s was your plan.
Annin answered her with a smile and then they two started to kiss again.
———- // ———-
Annin sighed with the memory, she have been avoiding be in the mongoose room, not just because she was searching for Nobunaga, but also because that couch bring certain memories to her. Annin get out from her thoughts when she saw the pervert guard from the prison holding something that reminded the platters with food that is normally used by them, seeing how suspicious he looked she decided to enter in the place that he came out. Thanks to this she was now some hidden place of the prison that she never saw before, Annin sighed when she noticed that was lost. But a sound called her attention, the sound of chains.
Just driving herself by the sound Annin reached a long corridor with a cell in the end, and there sitting in a chair, with chains holding her, was Nobunaga. The mongoose leader ran in direction of the cell and tried to open the gate of the cell but was useless.
Nobunaga that was just staring the floor raised her gaze and saw Annin, fear take her face when she saw the girl.
- What are you doing here Annin?
Annin ignored her and again tried to open the gate, seeing this Nobunaga stood up from her chair and took Annin hands, the mongoose leader glared her and Nobunaga did the same.
- Stop! You have to go, they probably didn’t find you here yet because the prison chief is not here, but if you don’t go now will be in troubles.
- Why? Why that woman is taking you here? What is happening?
Nobunaga sighed.
- I can’t answer this, please Annin go!
For the first time after months Nobunaga treated Annin in a cold way, she was not happy with that, but Nobunaga didn’t have other choice.
- I missed you; I thought you was dead or have run away!
- I missed you too but…
That was the last thing that Annin remember before be knockout by someone, she wake up in her couch in the room of team mongoose, alone and with a letter in her hand.
‘’If you want to live, keep your mind out of the prison business.’’
After read the piece of paper Annin throw it and screamed, all the time that spend searching was for nothing, she could not help Nobunaga and she could not punish who take Nobunaga from her. Hate, that was the word who described her in that moment, she hated that place; she hated that prison, the prison that has stolen her freedom, her lover and her hope.
-
Entry #18
Title: Boys Don't Cry
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s):Abe Maria (Tetsuo), Matsui Jurina (Nobunaga)
Word Count: 3,115
Boys Don't Cry
She was only 5 when her mother died, killed in a car accident by a drunk driver while on her way to pick her up from school, she was in absolute despair but her father reassured her that everything would be okay.
It was all lies.
From what she could understand, the bills from her mother’s funeral arrangements and such were rather expensive, her father struggled to pay it all on his own and soon they were in debt, they had to sell their home but that wasn’t enough to dent whatever they’d owed.
Her father started drinking and became an alcoholic, the irony of it all, he ended up losing his job for coming to work inebriated more than he probably should have. Eventually, he started spending his days holed up in their dingy apartment, drinking his sorrows away. Maria was practically a ghost to him except for when he needed her to go out and buy more beer though with what money and how was a young girl even suppose to purchase alcohol, you ask?
Her father found a way.
She was forced to pickpocket and steal whatever food she could get her hands on, it was pure luck that she wasn’t caught at all though getting her father his beer proved more difficult but she somehow suckered some poor souls into getting it for her with whatever sorry excuse she came up with.
The money mostly was spent on keeping her father drunk, there was hardly any left to purchase food to keep herself from starving.
—-
School was her only escape, being surrounded by anyone other than her father was a relief and it didn’t smell like stale beer unless her clothes counted. The only problem was that because of the constant fear of her father’s mood swings, she had a hard time trusting the other kids and teachers. She knew they meant well but she couldn’t shake the feeling that if they found out her secret, she would be ridiculed for having a useless father and a broken home.
It didn’t help that she was a naturally quiet child, preferring to sit in the back or the corner to not draw any attention to herself.
Despite desperately wishing she could just work up the nerve to talk and make friends, it was her fear that would always hold her back all the way to high school.
She was a ghost at home and here as well.
—-
Another night of her drunken father’s exploits, a particular night that had him more agitated than before, from her room she could hear him screaming over losing some bet which she knew would turn into another night of him in an intoxicated rage. It didn’t take long for him to bust through her bedroom door, yelling at her before Maria’s father took her by surprise and struck her across the face, knocking her down. Somehow satisfied, her father stumbled his way out of her room, down the hall and back to the den to possibly pass out.
Why, why was this happening to her? Whatever happen to the father who would pick her up from school and buy her ice cream, take her to the park and push her on the swings, who would slip her sweets when she wasn’t suppose to have any?
Why was everything so fucked up now?
She tended to her bleeding lip before heading off to bed, trying to think of an excuse for school tomorrow that would explain her new injury.
She dreamt of her mother that night.
—-
Maria wish she was brave, brave enough to stand up to her father, brave enough to reach out to the other kids in her school, brave enough to speak up and not just be that shy docile child she has been since the first time her father started abusing alcohol. She wanted to be like the heroes in the manga she would read in the convenience store while escaping from her father’s drunken wrath at home; she wanted to be brave like Goku whenever he fought against a new enemy, brave like Kenshin whenever he would save his friends, brave like Yusuke whenever he had to save Kieko.
But she didn’t have any powers, brutal strength or mastery of weapons, she was just a girl.
She wish she wasn’t so weak.
—-
The first time she got in a fight was by accident.
Walking home from school, she somehow passed through some yankee girls’ territory, they surrounded her and threatened that if she didn’t give them any compensation, they would kick her ass; she had no money, her father took it all, leaving nothing for her to even buy a meal. Maria didn’t know how to fight or at least really well, fending off her drunken father wasn’t exactly good practice and she wasn’t exactly going to go looking for one either. She tried her best to keep them at bay, blocking their attacks and delivering a few of her own; she needed to get home soon or her father would get angry, she really didn’t want another injury to treat for tonight and explain tomorrow at school to her teachers.
Something must of triggered her because she soon realized that one of the girls who was attacking her was on the ground with a broken bloody nose, the other two looked shocked but it quickly switched to fury as they attacked her.
Maria didn’t get home until extremely late that night, the other girls had roughed her up a bit, she had to come up with a good enough excuse to explain her injuries. Luckily for her, her father was passed out in the den, so she didn’t have to deal with his drunken fury; she dressed her wounds and got ready for bed.
Despite feeling like she was hit by a truck, Maria couldn’t help but feel so damn satisfied with being able to hold out her own against those girls.
It was the first time she felt strong.
—-
Arriving home from another night of pickpocketing, Maria dropped the new case of beer next to her father, no longer having to be yelled at to be reminded of what to do as she hurried off to her room, in hopes of avoiding him once he tore through the case and started up his usual drunken rampage throughout the house.
She wasn’t so lucky.
Maybe an hour or two or maybe three, she couldn’t be sure since the clock in her room was long smashed from one of her father’s previous uproars, she didn’t care enough to replace it with a new one if it was just gonna be destroyed by him again later on; she heard yelling and furniture being knocked over followed by a few crashes of whatever was being broken, her father screaming out her mother’s name. She could hear stomping throughout their apartment but it was when the noise turned towards the direction of her room that she started to panic.
She could hear him bumping against the hallway walls and hitting them, probably making more dents that they would have to hide from their landlord; she hoped that he would ignore her, forget that she was even existing right now, that he was too drunk to work a doorknob, that he would trip and knock himself out—anything so he wouldn’t barge in through her bedroom door.
Luck just wasn’t on her side.
Her father kicked opened her bedroom door, it crashed heavily against the wall, making the dent there already more prominent that before. He yelled out insults and profanities at her as he stumbled his way towards inside her room with his fist raised, ready to strike out against her.
Paralyzed, she was paralyzed; she couldn’t move for some reason, she was more afraid than ever before and as her father’s fist connected with her face, busting her lip, she could taste blood in her mouth.
She reacted before she could stop herself.
Her father laid unconscious on the bedroom floor, with the force of Maria’s punch and the haziness he had from drinking earlier, he’d stumbled backwards and hit his head against the doorway frame, knocking himself out.
This was bad, really bad; never before had she struck out against her father, what was she to do? She couldn’t stay, he would definitely kill her once he woke up, she needed to leave but she couldn’t just go with him like this, right…?
Quickly calling an ambulance, Maria packed whatever she would need, grabbing as much money as she could from where her father stored their finances.
Great, now she assaulted her father and stole from him.
Hastily putting everything in her ratty backpack, she rushed to leave as she could hear sirens coming from a distance already. Before hurrying off, she took one last look at her home, realizing she could never come back and ran off in hopes of never being found.
—-
Finally arriving at from what she heard over the intercom, Aichi, it seemed.
Maria figured it was far enough from Kyoto and that hopefully her father wouldn’t think to look all the way over here for her. She hoped he was alright, even though he made her life a living hell, he was still her father but she just couldn’t stay even if she had never hit him, she desperately wanted to get away.
—-
She found an abandoned home not far from the station and figured this would be best since there was no way she could ever afford enough rent for a apartment, she still need to eat so unfortunately, she took to pickpocketing again.
She hated it, she hated how everything in her life had dwindled to this as she swiped another wallet from some poor unsuspecting fellow.
—-
It was starting to get to her, she had only been on her own for a few months but the loneliness was getting to her and making each day feel more like a chore to get through.
She craved another human being to just talk to, to take away this ugly feeling dwelling in her that kept on growing with each passing day, Maria wished she could go back to school.
Even though she had always been alone, at least she was surrounded by others, she felt safe there but she could never go back no matter what for fear of her father.
As she stumbled into the park restroom nearby, there was no power or working facilities at the home she was staying in, so this was the only way for her to keep herself from looking haggard.
Checking to make sure no one was in any of the stalls, she closed and locked the door. Turning on the faucet to wash her face, Maria looked up to see herself in the mirror, she seemed even more sullen than she did yesterday and the day before. Her eyes had dark circles under them and her cheeks were beginning to hollow due to eating so little.
It was all too much.
She started to cry, the frustration of everything that had build up had finally taken it’s toll on her, the sounds of her sobbing echoed in the small room.
No!
No, she need to be strong, she couldn’t just give up like this or all the times her father yelled at her for being useless would be true. Maria remembered all those heroes she read in manga before, how much they brought her strength because they didn’t give up, how they were always strong and brave.
Wiping away her tears, Maria promised herself that she would keep surviving.
—-
This was bad, really bad.
She had waited for a potential target to appear while in a crowded marketplace and once she spotted him, she made her move. Quickly, she swiped the poor fellow’s wallet and walked briskly into a small alleyway, as she was heading towards a more secluded area to check out what she had taken, she heard a deep voice yell from the direction she had been and loud stomping from someone running.
Maria took off, sprinting as fast as she could.
But no matter how many twists and turns she took or climbing over whatever obstacle, the person chasing her seemed to always keep up.
She mistakenly took a wrong turn and ended up at a dead-end, the footsteps that were following her stopped, she turned around not only to see the man she had stolen from but others as well.
She made the mistake of stealing from some yankee and it looked like he called for backup.
Shit.
Maria could hold her own but only if it was one-on-one or a couple more but there was no way she could take on this many.
She was done for.
And as the first guy charged, she prepared herself.
She blocked and tried to attack as best as she could but it only got worse when the others surrounded her and started delivering blows of their own, how much longer could she hold on for?
The sound of one of her attackers in pain bought everything to a standstill, looking over to where she heard it, she could see a young girl and the first thing she noticed was the two scars around her strangely only grey-colored eye.
Immediately, a few of the men charged at the new girl in retalliation for their fallen comrade but it proved nothing when she took them down in a couple of hits. Taking advantage of their stupor, Maria attacked the others that still surrounded her and in no time, both girls were the only ones left standing.
As the mysterious newcomer started leaving, she motioned for Maria to follow her, she probably shouldn’t have so willingly gone along with a stranger for all she knew this girl could probably turn around and attack her, leaving her for dead but she felt no danger in doing so.
They ended up in a empty park, stopping to sit on the swings.
It was quiet before the other girl finally spoke.
“What’s your name?”
She didn’t look at her when she asked that, choosing instead to stare up ahead.
“Maria.”
Nodding to her response, the other girl turned to face her and gave a small smile, “Jurina.”
She brought up her hand to shake, Maria hesitantly followed suit, her grip was really strong.
—-
After that run in with Jurina, Maria found herself meeting up with her at the same park where they first spoke with each other everyday. No longer did she feel so lonely, like everything was spiraling downwards, she had a friend.
But all good things come to an end.
—-
“I might not be around much longer.”
Startled by this sudden news, Maria nearly choked on the bento she was eating.
Composing herself, Maria turned to Jurina, who was busy staring at her own half-finished lunch, picking at the rice with her chopsticks.
“Why?”
“…I did something horrible and some people might be coming after me soon.” Jurina spoke softly, her expression forlorn and Maria wondered what she could have done that was so horrible but she refused to pry, both girls never talked about how they ended up on the streets.
She tried to think of something comforting but her mind remained blank until Jurina spoke up again.
“Promise me this though.” Jurina gently took hold of Maria’s shoulder, leaning in to look her in the eye.
“That no matter what, you keep on going, that you keep on moving forward even if I’m gone. Keep surviving, you are strong.”
The grip on her shoulder seem to weigh so heavily in her heart, why was she telling her this? But she nodded in agreement to the promise, Jurina released her and both girls returned to their unfinished bentos.
They separated soon afterwards, it was the last time Maria saw the other girl.
—-
Maria wondered if anyone was coming after her, did her father report her to the police?
She ran away over a year ago and yet there had been no one confronting or approaching her on what she did, she wondered how long she could keep hidden.
And as she looked up at the chipped paint on the ceiling, she hoped that Jurina was doing okay before sleeping that night.
—-
She was startled awake by loud banging coming from downstairs of the abandoned home she was living in, she briefly wondered what it was before she heard a harsh slam and many heavy footfalls traveling all around and up the stairs.
Uniformed men barged into the room she was in, grabbing hold of her roughly and pulling her throughout the house. She tried to struggle free before she heard an electrical snapping sound and her body was in massive pain, draining her energy.
As they dragged her out towards a black van, the last thing she saw as they threw her in the vehicle was the smirk from a man wearing glasses.
—-
She was roughly woken up by the van lurching to a stop, she was dragged out of the vehicle and could barely make out that they were in a forest in front of some building before a black bag was forced over her head.
As she was pulled off into whatever direction they were going, she was ordered to change into some jumper before donning the black bag over her head again, it didn’t take long for them to stop once more as she was pushed against a table (she assumed) and forced into wearing some kind of heavy bracelet.
Maria didn’t know how long they had been walking but she soon heard yelling growing louder and louder as they traveled, from what she could probably guess were other girls?
The uniformed men pulled off the black bag on her head and threw her into some room before leaving, she didn’t understand what was going on, it felt like everything happened in a blur from when she was taken till now.
“Hey.”
All of her fear and thoughts disappeared when she heard a familiar husky voice, she looked up from where she had been thrown to the ground, staring into a pair of eyes with one colored grey.
Maria knew she was safe now.
-
Entry #19
Title: Black Sweet Apple
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Matsui Rena, Shinoda Mariko, Matsui Jurina, Watanabe Mayu; Rena/Mariko, Jurina/Mayu
Word Count: 2,696
Note: words in italic is Jurina's thought.
Black Sweet Apple
"I like you, please be my girlfriend" a boy's confession.
"Okay, but only if you get that apple for me" a short black haired girl said. She is pointing the black apple on top of the apple tree across this street.
"You are crazy..." the boy scared, "Please forget what I've said before" then the boy ran away.
The girl sighed and growled, "Coward!!!" She picked up a stone and threw it to the tree but it missed and hit someone on the head.
"Who is that?!" the victim shouted.
"Run!!" the girl hurriedly ran away with ultra high speed.
This short haired girl named Matsui Jurina, a 15 years old girl who is longing for love relationship. Many suitors ran away and gave up on her because of that weird request. She will only date the person who is willingly climb that big tree and get the black apple which is on the very top of the tree. How many times do boys run away after hearing her request? That's maybe over 48th time. Why is she insisting to date someone who can get that apple? Well...
=========
At home
"I'm back..." Jurina walked in, lazily put off her shoes.
"Did someone confess to you again?" There this tall, brown haired man is his twenties, walking out from the kitchen bringing a glass of water. His name is Shinoda Mario, her soon to be brother-in-law.
"H-How did you know?!" Jurina surprised to hear that from Mario.
"It's all written on your face~" Mario poked Jurina's fluffy cheek and pinched it.
"Huurrrt!" Jurina complained and tried to remove Mario's hands, "Rena-chan, help!"
"Okay, okay... enough playing" a woman in her twenties is walking out from the kitchen, bringing two plate of well-cooked curry in her hands.
"Why are you insisting to date a man who will get that apple for you?" Mario asked.
"You don't know why?" Jurina shocked, "Rena-chan?"
Both Mario and Rena looked at each other and shrugged their shoulder. Jurina facepalmed for herself, "How can you both forget about it?" Jurina slightly pushed Mario out of her way and went straight to her room.
"Won't you join us for dinner?" asked Rena.
"Heck no!" Jurina walked into her bedroom.
What stupid question is that? They are both like spicy food, unlike me who can't take it. Last time I took her cooking and ended up being hospitalized for three days because of terrible diarrhea. Both of them really are a spicy couple, always having super duper curry rice and spicy soup as dinner. Even mom and dad rather go to restaurant to have dinner.
Why am I so insisting to date a person who can get that apple for me? That happened four years ago when I am 11. Rena-chan is so upset because her boyfriend cheated on her. Mario-sama appeared to be her bestfriend (partner in spicy food), came to concern for her. It's revealed that actually Mario-sama has crush on my sister. He took my sister to somewhere in the garden where the very big tree was, I am following them that time. There, he is holding my sister's hands and looking at her passionately.
"You know, girls are like apple. The best one is always on top of the tree. Boys are always picking up the rotten apples which fell to the ground because they have no courage to pick the best one. They are too lazy to sacrifice themselves"
He smiled at my sister then walked closer to me, "When you grow up, don't date those boys who can't sacrifice themselves for you"
Then he walked to the tree and climbing it. My sister is surprised also panicked that time to see Mario climbs the tree to get the apple for her. There're times when Mario slipped from the branch and almost fell. My sister is squeezing my hands tightly as she watches Mario climbing to the top. He managed to get the bright red apple and went down safely. His smile is so dazzling in the sunset at that time. He told my sister to grab a bite on the apple and she did soﾅ her expression is full with happiness and she can't stop saying it's sweet. Mario shows off his smile proudly and confesses to Rena-chan.
"Since you ate that apple, it means you are officially become my girlfriend"
Jurina pissed and punched her pillow as punching bag, "How can they forget that?! It's you who told me to date a person who can bring that apple from the top of tree!! Curse you Mario!!" (looks like Jurina misunderstood the meaning)
--------------------------------------------
Outside the room...
"Hachiiuuuuu..." Mario is sneezing.
"Are you alright? Is that the food too spicy?" Rena asked concernedly.
"I wonder..."
=====================
Days later...
Jurina is standing under that apple tree and staring at the black apple on the very top.
"Red apple has become black... I think it's rotten" she sighed, "I've been waiting for someone till it's got rotten. Maybe I should take down that apple, so it will lower the height target for my new suitors?"
Jurina picked up a ton of stones and launching it like a machine gun at the apple but all missed. Then suddenly there's a sound of broken glasses. A middle-aged man is coming out from afar, shouting and cursing about who dare to break his windows. Jurina hurriedly picked up her belonging and turned to leave. Just then, a voice appeared from behind the tree.
"I saw you threw the stone toward the windows" a boy showed himself, "Matsui Jurina"
"W-Who are you? H-How did you know my name?" Jurina shocked, then she saw the boy is holding her student card.
Jurina ran back to the boy and asking him to return her student card, "Give it back to me"
"I'm going to report you" the boy said and going to call that middle-aged man but Jurina pressed her hands on the boy's mouth, dragging him away across the street. Once Jurina feels the situation is safe, she let off her hands.
"Pffuuuaaaahhh..." the boy is catching his breath, "Are you going to kill me?"
"Please, don't report me. I didn't mean to do that, I just want to get that apple"
"If you want an apple, buy it yourself. All trees in that garden are private properties"
"It's not I want to eat that apple. It just..." Jurina's eyes glittering in tears, "I just want to date someone who can get that apple for me. But all of them run away when I suggest this. I think maybe the target is too high, so if I get that apple down, then it will lower the height. Maybe there will be someone who can get the apple for me"
"Baka..." the boy said as he handed his handkerchief to Jurina.
"Thanks" Jurina took it and wiped her tears. When she was about to return the handkerchief, she noticed a label at the corner of it. "Ma-yu-?" she spelled it out.
The boy blushed and immediately took back his handkerchief.
"So, your name is Mayu? What a cute name" Jurina claps her hands together and smile innocently.
"It was my stupid brother, sewing my name on it" Mayu hurriedly put the handkerchief into his pocket and leaves.
==========
At Home
"La~la~la~la~" Jurina put off her shoes and placed it neatly on the shoe shelf.
"Someone managed to get the apple for you today?" asked Mario curiously while having a spicy drumstick in his mouth.
"Nope~" I smiled and keep walking toward my bedroom. "I met a cute boy today~"
"She acts like you when you fell in love with me" Rena appeared behind Mario, watching her sister walking into her room. Mario smiled and offered his drumstick to Rena.
"Wonder why the drumstick is sweet today"
------------------------------
------------------------------
------------------------------
I, Matsui Jurina decided to give up on that apple. I will start dating to whoever confesses to me today.
"I like you, please be my girlfriend" a boy is confessing to Jurina.
Jurina smiled sweetly and nodded her head, "I-- aacckkkkh" she got hit by a stone from nowhere.
"Jurina-chan!" the boy is going to catch Jurina's unbalance body but he's pushed by someone.
Mayu appeared behind Jurina and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, gently placed Jurina's head on his shoulder. He is giving another boy a deadly glare. The other boy thinks that he is Jurina's boyfriend and immediately bowed at them and embarrassingly left. "I'm sorry, I don't know you already have a boyfriend"
"Wait!" Jurina called out but Mayu grabbed her wrist, dragging her along with him.
"What are you doing? Where will you bring me to?" Jurina tried to release Mayu's grip on her.
"Here" Mayu stopped and let go of Jurina's hand.
Jurina looked around and found out that she is in the garden, under the big apple tree with the black apple on top of it. She wonders why Mayu brings her here, don't tell me he is reporting me to that ugly man because I broke his windows? Jurina panicked and turned to leave but paused by Mayu's question.
"Will you eat that apple?" Mayu asked.
"Eh?" Jurina confused.
"If I bring you that black apple, will you eat?" Mayu cleared his question.
"Eh? Are you going to get that apple for me?" Jurina is looking at Mayu with shimmering eyes, "If you are willingly to get that apple for me, of course I will eat, even it will make me having diarrhea" Jurina is really happy to know Mayu is gonna get her that apple, on the very top of this tree.
Without saying any words, Mayu rolled his sleeves and climbed the tree. The tree is about twenty feet from the ground. As she watches Mayu climbs the tree, her heart can't stop beating hard. Whenever Mayu took another step, Jurina's heart skips a beat. She never knows this tiny boy has the courage that wins all the boys she has met. With his skinny arms, he holds the branch firmly and climbs more higher to the top of the tree. After 30 minutes of climbing, Mayu managed to reach the top. He is smiling at the black apple just an inch from him. When he reached his hand to take the apple, the branch under his feet breaks all of the sudden.
"Mayu!!" Jurina screamed in horror and burst into tears.
Mayu is falling down from the tree, Jurina can hear the sound of leaves brushing each other and Mayu's growls. He is still trying his best to grab something that will stop him from falling and finally, six feet from the ground, he wrapped his left arm on a thick branch. Wounds all over his smooth skin and his handsome face but he is smiling like the pain is nothing for him. He is smiling proudly while holding the black apple in his right hand. Somehow, his smile reminds her to Mario. At that time, Jurina thinks she found her destiny.
"Hey, don't just standing there and crying. Help me down" Mayu called.
Jurina wiped her tears and stretch her arms, "Jump down, I will catch you"
"No way! I won't do that!" Mayu complained.
"It's just six feet from the ground. Trust me, I will catch you" Jurina said to ensure him.
"I will never do that" Mayu insisted.
Jurina thinks for a while and face him with a big grin, "You forgot to zip up your~~"
Mayu shocked and loose his grip on the branch and falling down. Jurina managed to catch Mayu but she can't manage to keep her balance and ended up falling together on the ground. Mayu blushed when he realize that he is on top of Jurina and tried to move away but Jurina wrapped her arms around Mayu's neck and pulled him for a hug.
"I said I will catch you and I did it~" Jurina said happily.
"Get off" Mayu pulled himself away from Jurina and back facing her, checking on his zip.
Jurina laugh out loud to see Mayu's reaction, "I was just kidding on you"
Seeing how big Jurina's mouth when she is laughing like that, Mayu shoved the black apple into her mouth to shut her up. Jurina is cursing Mayu while the apple is still stuck between her mouth, saying how can you stuck this rotten apple between my mouth. Mayu finds she's cute like this and leaned in to take a bite of the apple.
"Sweet" Mayu said with his charming smile.
Jurina is completely stunted there with tomato face. She slowly takes the apple out and taking a bite on it. The apple is unexpectedly sweet and juicy. Mayu took out his handkerchief for Jurina's to clean her mouth. He walked to the apple tree and touched it gently.
"Did you know, the best apple is always on the very top of the tree" Mayu turned to face Jurina and continue, "My brother once told me that girls are like apple, the best one is always hard to get. I am a person who aimed for the best. I won't let myself to get 90 in exam, I always aimed higher. I won't let myself look dirty because I want to show the perfect side to everyone... and also, I always aim for that apple" Mayu pointed the black apple in Jurina's hand.
"I am waiting for the girl who dares to aim for that apple, which placed on top of this tree. Then I meet you, I saw how you deal with all your suitors. I am getting more interesting with you. Maybe you are the person I've been waiting forﾅ even if that apple is black and looks rotten but inside it's sweet, isn't it?"
Jurina stunted there, amazed by Mayu's speech. She didn't know there's also someone who aims this black apple for a long time like her. She feels so happy to hear that plus Mayu is comparing her with the apple, that means Mayu see her as the best girl of girls... but wait, did he say something rotten? Is my appearance look that bad?
"Oh yeah, and for the payback the other day when you hit me with stone... and also my house windows..." Mayu walked closer and stopped right in front of Jurina, "You have to be my girlfriend"
Jurina surprised and confused, "You're the one I hit with stone? What did you mean by 'Your House'??"
"Actually all the trees in this garden belong to my family, and the windows you broke are from my house. That ugly man over there is my gardener" Mayu explained.
"............" Jurina jaw dropped to hear that.
Suddenly, Mario and Rena appeared behind Jurina. Mario saw them and stopped to greet them, "What are you doing here?"
"Oni-chan" Mayu bowed.
Jurina turned back to see Mario and her sister - Rena are standing there, greeting her with smile, "Nee-chan, what are you doing here?"
"I'm visiting my future parents-in-law" Rena waved her hands to Mayu, "Oh, hi there, my soon-to-be-little brother in law"
"Why I didn't know about this? Mayu and Mario are siblings?!" Jurina stressed.
"By the way, why are your uniform get so dirty?" asked Mario.
"I'm getting the apple for her" Mayu explained, "She is now my girlfriend"
"Oh, how... Did your family always use this trick to get girls?" Rena pinched Mario's cheek.
"Well, my family is running apple business. It's normal if we use the same trick to get girls" Mario said playfully.
"EEEH?!!" Jurina gets more shock.
"Ehemm..." Mayu cleared his throat, "Actually, this is not black apple, I just put blackberry jam on it to let it attracts people eyes" he explained to Jurina, "But it's too late now, for you to regret"
Mayu stands in front of Jurina with left hand on his waist and right hand pointing at Jurina's forehead, "You are my girlfriend now"
I will never get near to apple now... it's a very dangerous thing... my advise for you, don't ever look at black apple...
-
Entry #20
Title: Majisuka Kiss
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Oshima Yuko, Matsui Rena, Matsui Jurina; Yuko/Rena
Word Count: 1281
Majisuka Kiss
The girls 48 were among recordings the second season of the dorama Majisuka Gakuen, the team had finished shooting the scene where Rena Matsui (Gekikara) finds Yuko senpai in her dream before waking up in a hospital bed surrounded by her friends. After the end of the recording Rena just left the set as fast as she can the place without even thanking the production or talk to Yuko.
-This is bad, this is bad … -Rena repeated to herself walking the halls of the school that served as the backdrop for the drama, as she hugged her arms clutching the sleeves of the jacket of her character. The girl was walking in a hurry without looking sideways when bumped into someone.
-Ouch! -Said the girl sitting on the floor because of the fall.
-I’m sorry Jurina. Are you okay? - The eldest Matsui asked to reach out to the youngest.
-Yes, you will not hurt me. -Jurina said to hold the hand of Rena and up. -And you?
-What about me?
-Are you okay? It seems strange.
- Y-yeah I’m okay. Why wouldn’t be? -Rena gave a nervous smile
-I don’t know, it was just a question. -Jurina raised eyebrows. -It was fine recording with Yuko-san? -Rena lowered his head. -Rena-chan?
-Help me Jurina-chan! -Exclaimed the older girl holding arms younger.
-Hm… then Oshima-san made you heart race? -Jurina joked. The duo Matsui was sitting in the bleachers of the empty pool that lay outside the school.
-This is not funny! -Rena complained to hide his face with his hands. -I don’t know what to do. As I look at her face now?
-Think of the bright side of things and not the bad. Oshima-san knows?
-No. -She said looking at Jurina.
-So there’s no problem. If you find yourself strangely beside her, Yuko-san will not notice. You know she is always with hugs and kisses with other members.
-Yeah … I think you’re right. -Rena said, between a sigh.
-Of course I have. –Jurina put his arm around Rena.
-How do you know so much about love affairs? -Asked Rena to face the newest.
-Well… -Jurina blushed and shuffled his face she looked at the watch on his wrist. -Oh! Look at the time, it’s almost lunchtime! -The girl stood up and walked toward the school.
-Eh?! Jurina?! Jurina you didn’t answer my question! -Rena called to follow the girl.
-Remember, when you see Yuko-san act normal. -Jurina said Rena’s ear as the two entered the room where they were serving lunch.
-They said my name? -Yuko asked to leave behind one of the staff suddenly. -Oh! Jurina hello! Rena-san! You left in such a hurry today’s filming. Is everything okay? -Yuko asked the girl with her lovely smile, making Rena blush.
-I can’t! -She screamed and ran out of the place. The older Matsui began running through the halls of the school away from their staffs and colleagues.
-Matsui! Hey, Matsui! -She heard the voice of his senpai in his back, Yuko was behind her.
-Leave me alone! -A girl screamed trying to run faster. Rena climbed some stairs that led up to the terrace where there were several barrels, papers and trash. The location where was recorded Maeda-san and Gakuran fight in the first season.
-Rena-san! -Yuko exclaimed how you got hold of the girl’s wrist.
-I told you to leave me alone! -Rena said while trying to hold what was in vain, since Yuko grabbed her other wrist.
-But what happened? -Oshima asked while trying to hold Matsui while not hurting her.
-N-nothing, just leave me alone! -She screamed as her arms twisted with Yuko.
-Rena-san care! If you keep moving like this we end up falling. - Yuko said trying to calm the girl. She stepped back, but did not notice the barrel on his back and fell with Matsui on top of her body.
-S-sorry Yuko-san! Are you okay?! -Rena asked to raise a little face, the girl’s legs open with feathers Yuko who were leaning on the barrel between them.
-I said we were going to end up falling. -Yuko smiled, her hands were on Rena hips. -I’m fine, I don’t show up often this season then it’s okay if I get hurt. I’m more worried about the costumes have gotten dirty. And are you okay?
-Y-yes I am. -Rena replied, blushing, she felt Yuko’s hands tighten the jacket.
-Rena … it’s okay with you? -The older girl asked, his face was serious now.
-W-why do you think I‘m weird? - Rena felt her heart going out through the mouth.
-Because did you leave so fast the film set today when I spoke to you just now you also fled.
-It’s something to me?
-No …
-Did I do something wrong to you?
-No it’s just … She pursed her lips and brought his face to Yuko, her lips lightly touched the girl’s only seconds later to intensify the kiss. Rena felt a hand Yuko caress your hair and stop at your neck with this gesture of affection Matsui gave Yuko’s lips.
-I-I’ll take that as a “no.” -Yuko said smiling, but she was flushed to his ears.
-Y-you not angry? -Matsui asked with red face.
-For what?
-B-by I have kissed you. -The girl looked away. Yuko straightened sitting next to her.
-Why would I be now that I know their real feelings? -Matsui stared in amazement.
-Y-you know!
-Yes. Or do you really think I thought all that emotion in the scene we shot today was just acting? Tell the truth, you thought you could lose myself in real life? Rena-confirming just nodded. -Oh … this is so cute Rena-san. -Yuko said to embrace the girl and touching her face on it.
-B-but why you not angry? -Rena asked Yuko feel the breath on your skin.
-Think. Only when the affection is mutual and that we aren’t bothered at being kissed by surprise. -Yuko faced Rena, the brown eyes made contrast with the dark hair of the girl.
-I thought you liked the Kojima-san.
-And like her, I like being with her, I think she beautiful, but that doesn’t mean I feel something strong for her.
-And … feel something strong for me? -Matsui asked blushing. She clutched the sleeve of the uniform of dark blue sailor who wore Oshima
-I fell. -Yuko admitted to blush.
-Since when?
-I don’t know. Maybe… since we started recording this new season. Well, it just happened. They say love happens when you least expect it. And now here I am, trying to steal a kiss without scaring you.
-Know that you can do it at will.
-I know, but I love to see you embarrassed. It’s so cute. -Rena closed her eyes and buried her face in the shoulder of Yuko.
-I love you. -Rena said in Yuko ear.
-I love you too. -She heard laughter coming from Rena.
-Hey… are you mad? -A girl asked to look at the oldest. Rena was too ashamed to imitate Gekikara when he was not working, but she knew Yuko loved when she did.
-No, I’m very happy. -Oshima smiled showing his dimples. She spent her fingertips gently by double fake scar the girl had the eyebrow and then stroked her hair.
-Me too, I’m very happy. - Rena pulled Yuko hair to back exactly how the girl was in her character yankee and kisses again Yuko’s lips.
Now the girl would not have to look on the terrace, in the classroom, in the gym or on the ward. Yuko would always be with her. And they would be together for a million years.
-
Entry #21
Title: Tripping and Falling Back
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Oshima Yuko, Takahashi Minami, Maeda Atsuko; Yuko/Minami
Word Count: 2148
Tripping and Falling Back
Takamina first felt her responsibilities as the group’s general manager when a text popped up at 4am in the morning, jolting her out of her bed with a short but firm message.
Meeting in the Office now, our aces are in deep shit. – Yasusu
With no time to lose, Takamina jumped off her bed and threw on a big coat before running out to flag a cab. Her head was spinning; she wasn’t sure if it was the need to wake up at 4 in the morning or the fact that the ambiguous message mentioned someone really close to her heart.
But one thing she knew for sure: she didn’t like the sound of it.
-
Takamina clutched her head; it was spinning far worse than it was when she got out of bed an hour ago and the photos strewn all over the table in front of her wasn’t helping at all.
The agenda of the meeting was clear: Damage control.
The meeting room was abuzz with suggestions on what to do with a few staff busying themselves over at the white board, scribbling all the better recommendations down while both Togasaki and Aki-P buried their heads over at the other corner, engaged in whispered discussions. Takamina sighed, picking up a photo and winced; it’s going to be difficult to fabricate a lie out from all these evidences to cover their asses.
Hitting her fist on the wooden conference table in agony, Takamina let out a low yell. The room quieted down as all eyes were now affixed on her; the staff watched in horror as Takamina raised, eyes bloodshot from the lack of sleep and stress before grabbing a few photos in front of her and stormed out of the room, ignoring the shouts behind her for her to get back into the room.
Togasaki sighed before telling everyone to get back to their discussion and looked knowingly at the boss.
General Manager, Takahashi Minami, was on the job before anyone told her to.
-
Turning the key, the door clicked and unlocked. Takamina stood facing the door, taking a deep breath in and shook her head as though to clear off all her frustrations and anger. She stepped into the familiar house, one that she hadn’t came since a few months ago and chuckled silently to herself that the key still worked. Someone’s probably too busy to get it changed, she thought.
Walking into the eerily dark house, Takamina made a beeline into the room that she used to spend many nights in, feeling a breath stuck in her throat as she watched the sleeping girl from afar…
-
Flashback
“Let’s break up.”
“Why?”
“I fell out of love with you.”
“And in love with someone else?”
“Yes. I’m sorry Minami…” The girl held onto Takamina’s hand, nodding as tears fell from her face. She didn’t really know why she was crying; it was after-all her who initiated the breakup, betrayed the other girl’s feelings and ultimately the one who was supposed to be the happy one after being free from this relationship.
Takamina shook her head as her face scrunched up; disappointment, hurt, anger and betrayal flashed past her face as she looked at the ace whom she felt so much for, the person whom she fought so hard to keep by her side after the management knew about their relationship and the one girl whom she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.
The one who now, betrayed her heart.
-
Forcefully, a hand jerked her out of bed and the drowsy girl forced her eyes open only to recognise the silhouette in front of her to be of Takamina’s. Rubbing the sleepiness out of her eyes, a slap rang out in the room as Takamina’s palm kissed the side of her face.
Before the pain could register, the shock did.
“THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? WHY DID YOU LET THE PAPS GET SUCH PICTURES OF YOU!?” Takamina yelled, tears rolling down her face as an indescribable rage took over her, throwing the photos that were grabbed tightly in her hands onto the girl.
It wasn’t her plan to scream at the girl; she wanted to talk it out with her and find an acceptable reason for her actions but seeing her face, the one that she loved so much even now, she just couldn’t keep it inside her. She looked as the girl stared back at her open-mouthed, shock painting over her features and she felt a tug on her heart.
Nearly apologetic, Takamina clenched her fist, feeling as her sharp nails dug into her palm. Her head spun; she wasn’t sure if it was the worry, the anger, the lack of sleep or just about everything combined together.
She watched as the girl bent over and picked up the photos that had flew to the floor, gathering all the pieces that were mercilessly thrown in her face earlier. The poker face was something Takamina hated; the actress in her made it impossible for anyone to read what was on her mind most of the times, and Takamina, despite being her girlfriend, could hardly read them read.
“Takamina…” the soft, seemingly weak voice cut through the silent, jolting the general manager out of her trance. The shorter girl’s eyes softened as they locked with the other girl’s, watching as tears spilled down her face.
Takamina glared at the girl and turned her back, refusing to look at the crying girl. She tugged the back of Takamina’s pyjamas as if begging for the general manager to look at her. “I’m sorry…” she whispered, voice hoarse.
Slowly, Takamina felt the hand losing grip as it slid down her shirt; the girl did not say anything else as she tried to wipe the tears that kept falling, off her face. She sobbed quietly, debating within herself if she should explain everything to Takamina.
Saved for a few sniffs, the room was deadly quiet as Takamina stepped out of the room…
-
Flashback
“Who is the guy?”
“…”
“Right, I don’t even deserve to know who my girlfr- ex-girlfriend fell in love with.”
“Eiji Wentz…”
-
“Takamina…?” Yuko called out with her voice quivering as she stepped into the other bedroom; the one that she packed all their memories together in. She looked as Takamina traced a finger over the photo that they took the week they got together, heaving a sigh as memories started overwhelming her senses. Running to the other girl, Yuko threw her arms around the shorter girl and gave her a tight hug from the back. “I’m sorry. Minami, I’m sorry…”
A smile began to form on Takamina’s face unconsciously as tears welled up in her eyes. Turning herself around, she looked at the apologetic girl, “Why?”
The bluntness took Yuko back.
“We didn’t realise we were followed by the paparazzi,” she started, “Wentz was tasked with sending me home since Acchan was all wasted and over Takeru. Him, being all gentlemanly, didn’t decline even though we broke up some ti-“
“WHAT? YOU GUYS BROKE UP?” Takamina yelled, hands gripping on Yuko’s shoulders. The other girl sheepishly nodded, giving the younger girl another apologetic look. “When? Why? AND WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?”
Yuko smiled for the first time that night, “A few months ago. It didn’t cross my mind to tell you something as trivial as this.”
Takamina arched her eyebrows, “Trivial…if it’s trivial for you…”
Yuko nodded.
“I fell out of love again.”
-
Flashback
“I guess it’s the last goodbye for us?”
“…Thank you for the pleasant memories all these times…”
“You too, Yuu-chan. You too. And I hope whoever that your heart is pointing you towards now…would love you back…”
“I hope so too, though it’s probably impossible,” Yuko gave a dry laugh, picking up her bag as she opened the car door. Wentz gave a puzzled look as he stepped out of the car. “Well, we broke up once, so I guess, it’s hard to mend a broken heart?”
“So I see…you tripped and fell back in love……”
-
The sun streamed into the room, irritating Takamina’s eyes as she opened them slightly to look at her phone. Typing a text message to Togasaki, the general manager placed her phone back on the bedside table and closed her eyes, blowing a strand of stray hair off her face. The body next to her snuggled up against her, arms tightening themselves possessively around her waist and Takamina was suddenly reminded that she wasn’t alone. Looking down, she found the other girl’s legs intertwined with hers into an undistinguishable mess of limbs and chuckled softly.
Patting the other girl’s head gently, Takamina hummed a sweet tune that she shared with Yuko back when they were dating. Yuko stirred as the other girl placed a gentle kiss on the top of her head, stroking the shiny brown hair. She loved to look at Yuko’s sleeping face; it was one of her favourite thing to do each morning when she woke up next to the girl while they were dating.
One of the ace of AKB48, one of Japan’s promising budding actress and one of the most busy person in the entertainment industry, it was only while she was sleeping, does she shed the mask that she had to put on whenever she goes out to meet people. Replacing the hyperactive, energetically happy face, was the calm, serene and beyond gorgeous face.
Only while she was sleeping, she is Oshima Yuko.
-
As much as she wished to remain in bed with Yuko for the rest of the day, Takamina’s phone was telling her otherwise; it had been ringing and flooded with messages from the staff since early dawn and she had just been summoned back to the office with Aki-P’s latest message.
Trying to untangle her legs from Yuko’s with as little movement as possible, Takamina reckoned that it was a feat more difficult to achieve than standing in Tokyo Dome for her solo concert. Carefully extracting a leg out of the mess, Yuko moaned, burying her head deeper in Takamina’s chest as she forcefully turned the other girl ‘round to face herself.
The younger girl sighed, “Yuu-chan…wake up…” Yuko groaned, nuzzling her face against the pillow only to catch a soft moan. The girl nuzzled once again, puzzled at the light moans that seemed to sound like a certain someone.
Opening her eyes as the dull sunlight infiltrated her senses, Yuko smiled. The angelic face that greeted her, oh how she missed it so much. “Minami…” the older girl crooned, cupping the other girl’s face and gave her a morning kiss. “Good morning…”
“Good morning…now can I have my legs back? Aki-P just sent me an ultimatum and I’ve to get back to the meeting in 30 minutes,” Takamina said with a laugh, watching as the other girl pouted her disappointment. She patted Yuko’s head once again, “Someone has to clear up the shit you stirred up last night ya know?”
Yuko chortled, throwing a playful punch onto Takamina’s arm. “I’ve yet to hit you back for slapping me!”
“That woke you up, didn’t it?” Takamina ssexy beasted, rubbing the spot where Yuko hit. She didn’t let it show, but it pained her so much when she slapped Yuko the previous night. The guilty silence hanged in the air between them and Yuko cuddled up to Takamina, whining softly. “I’ve got to go,” lifting Yuko’s arms away from her waist, Takamina attempted to sit up from the bed, only to find herself being pulled back onto the mattress, coming face-to-face with her girlfriend. “Yu-unnnnnfff,” Takamina’s chiding died on her lips as a pair of full moist lips pressed firmly against hers.
Yuko ran her tongue lightly on Takamina’s lips, smirking against the kiss. Not one to reject such a proposal, Takamina quickly allowed its entrance and enjoyed Yuko’s soft skin brushing up against her own. The younger girl, face flustered, pulled away from the sweet lips before it was too late to stop. Yuko whimpered, face obvious with distaste that the kiss ended sooner than she liked it to be. “Don’t worry, we’ll have lots of time for this when I cleared up your mess,” Takamina laughed, sitting up and grabbing a scrunchie off the bedside table and tying up her hair in a bun. She turned around and smiled at her girlfriend as she opened the door.
“Thank you for falling back in love with me.”
-
Entry #22
Title: What lies beneath the surface
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Kimoto Kanon, Matsui Jurina
Word Count: 2840
(http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mam4w37xkL1r9gvzq.png)
What lies beneath the surface
Vampires. A lot of people would just shrug them off as urban legends, as things that only appears in novels, comic books or movies. But as I found out… they were real, silently living among us. They aren’t so much like the ones you read about, they don’t sparkle like in some crappy novel, they don’t change appearances, they don’t turn into dust. They just look normal like you and me.
-
25 years ago my family moved to the United States to start a new, and have a better life. Things weren’t going well for us back in Japan. Even though my parents are both university graduates, they both couldn’t find a proper job. The companies were always biased to who ever they employ. If you didn’t have any connections you either pray for something to happen or attempt to make something happen. My parents tried both of that. They didn’t like the concept of sucking up to their bosses like they’re coworkers did. They had enough, so with us in hand and the little money they had in their pockets. We moved here.
I was just an innocent little girl, not knowing if what we did was right. Although I didn’t like the idea of moving, I did understand that our current situation wasn’t very good at all, so it might be for the best.
I just focused on taking care of my younger sister, she’s always so clingy. She’s 4 years younger than me, but always so mature. Even so she still had a childish side, she loved coloring her book while laying down on her stomach, she would have a smile on her face and would always call me to join her. She doesn’t like losing or crying in front of others, when she feels like she can’t hold the tears in anymore she comes to me. Even though she’s taller, she has never teased me about being the short one even though I’m older. She once said that she wanted to be like me. Our personalities are so different. The only thing similar about us is our dimples, but even so we were really close and I loved her so much.
Everything was going perfectly well in our new home. Even though we were just living in a small apartment we didn’t mind, this might sound quite cheesy to you but we have each other, that’s all that matters. Everyone in the small town was friendly, it didn’t take us long to make friends. I was starting to feel glad that we moved here.
Until 5 years later. My father mysteriously disappeared his coworkers said that he had went home early but he never returned. I was only 12 at that time. I wanted to help my mother with anything that I could help her with. I was too young to go get an actual job and She was alone trying to raise two kids. My younger sister and I understood that we shouldn’t cause her trouble. So we did our best, in whatever it maybe. Studying, sports, anything that would make her proud at least. I started to learn how to cook and my younger sister would offer to help. God bless that child she would always cheer me and my mother up.
We could only hope for things to get better.
A year later, still no word from him. We lost all hope with trying to find him. The police have told us that there is, maybe, a possibility that he had died that day. Although they can’t prove anything until they found a body.
One night, I was shopping for groceries. When I saw a figure in the side walk, it was like he was waiting for me. I backed off and didn’t continue, only then did he finally called my name “Kanon…” He sounded like he was in pain “Run away…” he shouted.
My father is alive, but what I saw next was horrifying. His eyes in a different color. I do not know where to start explaining what I saw but, he was transforming, into another creature, which seems like a wild dog that runs in two legs… What do they call them? Werewolves? But I later found out that they were called Lycans.
I just dropped everything and started to run, earlier he looked like my father… but now he’s just some monster. I was so confused with what was going on, I even started to think that I was dreaming. But sadly for me, I wasn’t. I just ran as fast as I could and made it in to a back alley. Our apartment was close from the grocery store, but I didn’t want to lead him there.
I was so afraid that I didn’t noticed a vehicle coming, until it hit me. I hit the pavement, I heard my bones crack, and I was bleeding really bad. I couldn’t even move, I think I broke all the bones in my body that night.
I got a glimpse of the people that came out of the car. They were wearing black and one had a gun in his hand.
“Tsk. Shit… I think this one’s not going to make it” One of them said as he continued to inspect me. “It’s a pity she’s too young” He then said coldly.
“Can’t you at least feel a little bit of remorse, it was you that hit her after all” The other man scolded him.
“Come on David (http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9r42389Ec1qluop6o1_400.jpg), We’re not humans, if we kill that is to be expected of us, an-WOAH LOOK OUT!” His attention later turned to the creature that went towards him, quickly the other man fired. I heard the creature scream in pain. It seemed as though it worked as his body started to change back to human form. Slowly he made his way to me. The man still pointing his gun at him.
“P-papa…”I said weakly as my father started to stroke my hair. He kissed me in the forehead, I felt tears fall down on my face.
“Kanon…I’m sorry” he said crying, the then turned at the men that was just watching us. “Please… save my child” He begged. One of them approached him, now with his gun down. “Are you sure?” He asked, he looked down at me and then back at him. “If I turn her she will forever remain 13 and will probably suffer the consequences later”
“It’s because she’s only 13 that I want her to live…” My father said looking at the man. “Very well, but I cannot guarantee you how long she will live after this.” The man replied.
My father thanked him, he then turned to me and whispered. “Look after your mother and younger sister for me” He said with his last breath as he collapsed next to me. I started to feel cold, I saw the man come closer, he squatted next to me. I tried to look up, I met his bright blue eyes…they look so sad. I closed my eyes and my heart slowly stopped beating.
Six years.
It’s been six years since my older sister had disappeared, and six years since my father’s death. When they found him on the street he was already dead. They also saw some blood near him which they have confirmed to be my sister’s, they searched the whole area for anything, but nothing. All they could find was her blood next to my father. I heard that, when they found him, it looked like as if he was laying next to someone…who might have been her.
I was so devastated when I found out. I was only 9 at that time. I remembered my mom suddenly bursting into tears on the phone. When she was done, she held me close and just cried. “Jurina… you’re father’s not coming back…” she said. The next day more terrible news. My sister was not found yet. It was then when I started crying. I never cried in front of my mother before but my sister was gone, was all I could think of. But I remembered what my sister would tell me when I would get discouraged. “Jurina is strong, she can over come anything! I believe in you.” is what she would tell me. “I believe in you.” Are the words that kept repeating on my mind. It gave me the strength that I needed to go on. It was my turn, to take care of our family. Even though its just me and my mother now, we still manage to get through everyday.
Right when I turned 15, I immediately looked for jobs so I can help my mother with finances. I didn’t care about what video game came out, or what movies are coming out, I didn’t care. I only wanted to help my mother. That is what my older sister would have done. She would’ve even spoiled me too, like what she did back then. She used to pat my head all the time when I felt sad or when I feel I have a tummy ache. I started to pout then I thought about those days. I missed my older sister.
“Jurina?” I heard my mother called. “What’s wrong you’ve been spacing out?” She asked as we were eating dinner. It was my mom’s birthday so I made sure to treat her in a nice restaurant. I’m sure that’s what my older sister and Father would have done…
“No… nothing… How’s the food? Is it good?” I smiled and asked her, I didn’t want to bring her mood down, no not tonight.
When we were done eating we decided to watch a movie, but on the way there something unexpected happened. Something jumped on the hood of the car, I wasn’t sure what it was but It looked like… a big wild dog.
My mom tried to shake the thing off when she managed, she didn’t noticed the tree the car was heading towards to and crashed. When I came to, I turned to my mother. I tried to wake her up, shaking her, no response, I tried shouting but still she won’t wake up. Until I finally gave up. The car started to ignite, it will probably explode soon. This is probably it for me… Onee-chan. I wanted to at least see you one last time. I’m sorry.
I closed my eyes until something grabbed me and threw me out of the car. I feel my bones break as I cough out more blood. I couldn’t see the thing coming at me clearly… my vision was starting to blur… I couldn’t move.
Suddenly I hear gunshots, and I heard the thing in front of me growl but what fell down was just a mere human. I saw someone coming towards me. I tried to look but my eyes started to get heavy. “Are you sure about this…Kanon?” The person beside the smaller figure asked.
Kanon? I thought. That was once my older sister’s name. Has she been alive this whole time?
“I don’t want to leave her like this”
Upon hearing her voice I tried to look up, I recognized it. That voice that had always encourage me when I was younger. I wanted to see that person again one last time. but I was too weak, I couldn’t move my body anymore… I saw her walk towards me and I tried to turn my head. All I could see was a blurry image of what looked like a young girl.
“O-onee-chan… d-did you come for me?” I tried to say. The person sat down beside me. ”Shhh…Jurina go to sleep…” She said and gently placed her hand on my cheeks. Her hand felt cold. I slowly closed my eyes and stopped breathing.
———————————
A few hours later.
I opened my eyes the pain in my body had disappeared, was I only dreaming?
I looked around to see where I am, It was in some abandoned building where the windows are shut. There was sunlight peeking in from one of them but I felt like I should avoid it I wonder why.
Slowly, I remembered what happened the other night, I sat up and looked at what I was wearing. My clothes were all dirty and ripped from what happened. I remembered that I had injuries, but they seemed to have disappeared. Then I remembered my mother. I started crying, with my hand covering my face. I felt a hand touch my head.
Surprised, I looked at who it was. It was my older sister But she still looked 13 as if time stopped for her. She should be 19 now and should’ve at least grew taller, but she looked exactly the way she did before she disappeared except her eyes are bright blue which changed to back dark brown. Or is it just someone that looked like her?
Seeing how confused I was looking at her she finally spoke. “Jurina. I know you must be wondering why I still look like this…But for now you should rest, I’ll explain anything when the sun goes down” she said and started to pat my head like she did when I used to cry to her.
Without saying anything I obeyed her. I laid down on the bed and closed my eyes. I felt her put a blanket over me. Not that I needed it anyway. I didn’t feel cold or hot. I didn’t feel anything which scared me.
When I woke up, I looked around. I was still at the same place. I heard footsteps coming towards the room and I just stared at the door. My sister came in holding some clothes and a paper bag. She looked at me and smiled. “You should change your clothes” She said and handed them to me. I nodded and grabbed it from her. I still have no idea what’s going on.
I finished changing, I turned and looked at her. Her smile faded. She knew she has to explain everything to me eventually. She motioned for me to sit down so I did.
“Onee-chan… you should have at least let us know you were alive.” I started feeling a bit mad at her.
I just saw her look down, but she looked back at me again. “I’m sorry… I couldn’t come back again. After what happened that night…” She cleared her throat.
“You remembered those things you saw last night right?” She asked and I just nodded. I still didn’t know if what I saw was real.
“The reason why Papa had disappeared was because he was turned in to one of them” She paused as she saw me trying to process the information. “Those things are what people would call Werewolves but we call them Lycans” she continued.
“We?” I asked thinking out loud.
She took out a small blade and slowly she started to slit her wrist, blood started to pour. Surprised, I was going to stop her. She just looked at me and her eye color suddenly changed into a bright light blue color. “Jurina… this is why I couldn’t go back” She tried to explain. The would started to heal by itself. I looked at her with amazement.
She bit her lips and continued “That night when father was found. I was hit by a car and died.” She looks at me, to see if I was following along. “I was turned into a vampire”
I couldn’t believe what I just heard but I said nothing and waited for her to continued.
“…and last night… you…” she stopped and hesitated. “You died.” My eyes widened. It was like I was hearing a story from a fairytale, or a comic book. She then took my hand. Her hands were cold and so were mine. She then place her cold hand on my cheek, I looked up to see her face. “I’m sorry I couldn’t save Mama. It was already too late” She said with regret, her sad bright blue eyes turned back to dark brown.
I shook my head and gave her a hug, while still sitting down on the bed. “Onee-chan… You’ve been watching over us right?” The feeling that I had earlier about her leaving us disappeared. I closed my eyes as she started to pat my head. I knew she wanted to be with us too, I felt the same way. I couldn’t stay mad at her after all she was the only person that I have left. Even though now we’re both neither dead or alive.
She then went towards the table and reached inside the paper bag. She handed me something that looks like a clear juice bag. Except inside wasn’t juice. I knew what it was when I saw it’s color. I took and drank from it without saying anything.
And so it began. Our lives as Vampires. Living and trying to survive. Together.
What lies beneath the surface? I used to wonder about that too.
-
Entry #23
Title: Red String
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Nakatsuka Tomomi,Yokoyama Yui, Nonaka Misato; Tomomi/Yui
Word Count: 4390
Red String
Have you ever heard of the red string of fate? It’s a little thin string that ties two soul mates together; it’s just a legend though. At least it is for people unlike me that cannot see the mess of strings that tie people together. As far as I could remember I would look at the pinky on my hand and there would be a string limply tied to it. Yet whenever I said that there was something there nobody would believe me, they thought that I had just heard of the folklore and it was just my childish imagination kicking in. It wasn’t though; I had no idea about that legend until I was older. Yet because of the responses of those around me I started to leave that red string alone.
It wasn’t until I turned older that I yearned to see who was at the other end of that string, yet every time I would chase after it I knew in the back of my mind that it would be pointless. It would lead me places yes, but there was always the chance that the person at the other end didn’t even live in the same country let alone the same city.
I gave up on searching, thought that if we were really meant to be then we would find our way to each other. I was right about that part though, because that summer of first year she appeared before my eyes. Okay I might have been a little shocked at the fact that it was a she but then again I go to an all girl school I can’t be THAT shocked.
I don’t know what horrible deity above decided that we needed to have class in the summer but we did and she just waltzed right into our class with this stupid little smile. I don’t know if there was someone up their pulling our strings or something but she happened to be placed right next to me. A desk mate that I soon found out that I didn’t want. After everyone had settled in, class began but unlike usual I found it hard to concentrate.
That is because of the little thin red string tying us together that only I could see. Who would’ve thought that the person connected to be would be her. I was confused and unsure and our first conversation did nothing to help it.
She turned to face me, or at least that’s what I think she did because I was too focused on her hand to notice. “Uhm… do you have a hand fetish or something?” She whispered to me and I flushed red. I quickly stuttered out, “No, no I don’t.” before turning to face the board. She just gave me a strange look before shrugging her shoulders and refocused on the lesson. She did have nice hands though…
It was afterschool when I was finally free from her bothersome existence; she was putting me completely out of whack. I dragged my conflicted self back to the dorms in hopes that a nap would rid me of all these things that I’m feeling. The thread shows that she’s the one for me, but how exactly am I supposed to handle something like this. It’s not like I could just magically seduce her into liking me, I mean she probably thinks that I’m a complete weirdo!
“So, has the new kid caught our precious Chris-sama’s eyes? Want good old Micha to hook you two up?” I heard an almost annoyingly familiar whisper into my ear. I turned and gave her a pointed look which just seemed to encourage her some more. “I’m pretty good at this whole matchmaking thing~” She continued with a cheerful voice that made me just want to throw her off a cliff before she ruined my future. “No. Stay out of it; don’t you have your hands full with Sakiko and Umeda-senpai?” I asked hoping that she would become distracted. It was surprisingly though, not having either of the senpais outside my door trying to catch Micha’s attention.
She stopped and paused to think for a bit, “Oh them…? I think I banned them for a week for getting into a fight with each other. Why can’t they just seem to get along with each other?” I gave her an exasperated look, how does she just casually do stuff like that?! She’s older than me! Shouldn’t she handle her relationships more carefully? Then again this is Nonaka Misato we’re talking about; she probably doesn’t need to care considering her legion of fangirls.
I pitied the two senpais I really did, considering how Micha was always hesitant about the two of them. “They probably would start getting along with each other again if you stopped leading the both of them on and chose one.” I sighed out, this most definitely wasn’t the first time I’ve said something like this. It’s been almost half a year since the two of them started adamantly pursuing Micha and it truly seemed as if Micha was just stringing the two along. At least I would think that if it weren’t for the fact that we were such close friends.
She shook her head and replied, “Naw, good luck with your transfer student~ I’m rooting for ya!” Then she proceeded to casually float- I mean gracefully walk out of my door. I sighed to myself as I watched her retreating figure and started mumbling, “Micha… neither of them are right for you.” I stared at the thin red string attached to her left pinky and sighed some more.
It wasn’t my business to interfere with other people’s love lives but she’s my friend I can’t help but care. Even if she is usually an annoying empty brained ojou-sama type, okay maybe not but she still is hella annoying at times. My most hated memories are all a result of her; ever since I was young she’s caused me so much embarrassment. She even still brings it up for a laugh in front of people we’ve just met! I’ve seen too many people who are with the wrong people, and ultimately they all break up eventually. I just don’t want Micha to realize too late when she’s given half her life to the wrong person.
It was almost half a month later when I had given up on this Yui person. She was this completely headstrong, rude person and I most definitely didn’t like her. For the first time in my life I wished that I could actually be able to take a pair of scissors and snip off this red string that was tying me to this supposed soul mate. It was stupid for me to even care what this person was up to in the first place. No matter how many times Micha might tell me that it’s the typical boyish way of treating one’s crush I am so close to accidently tripping her down the stairs.
I heard a faint knock on my door and the same person that I was considering making some type of voodoo doll walked in. I gave her a glare before demanding an explanation. “Thought I’d show you how you gave me a bruise the size of Mt. Fuji on my head.” She said casually while lifting her hand awkwardly to point at the bruise that I had given her earlier that day in class when I slammed my textbooks on her. “Oh…” I muttered before lifting myself to the mini fridge and throwing her a cold drink. “Put it on. I don’t want your parents to find out and sue me or something.” She reached her hand out to get it but it felt out of her hands.
I was going to comment but she said, “Remember when you threw a basketball at me with full power last week?” My face fell some more, and I was starting to feel a tinge of guilt for all her physical trauma. “Oh… whoops.” Yui just shook her head and pull out the bag she was hiding behind her with her non traumatized by me hand. “Peace offering.” I would dare say that she said it cutely but then she added, “Ya know so I don’t die before I graduate?”
I gave her a glare before standing up to take the gift from her. “Aren’t you going to share~” She asked with her annoying voice. It’s like every time I think we might actually stop trying to kill – I mean I stop trying to hurt her she just has to screw it up. “Oh fine, get out of here after though. Unlike you I actually need to sleep at proper times instead of napping in class.” I scoffed at her, she deserved all the times I smashed her with a textbook at least I was a little less harsh than the teacher. She wouldn’t still be here with all her limbs intact if it was the teacher.
I mean seriously who hires an ex military buff guy to teach at an all girls school?
I grabbed some plates and set out the cakes that she had apparently purchased as a peace offering. “These are actually pretty good. Where’d you get them?” I asked out of curiosity and it was bugging the hell out of me how she was looking at me weirdly (like to plot my death?). “Oh I made them.” She said offhandedly and took a bite of the cake she had. “You can bake?!” I looked at her skeptically, “Then why are you failing home economics?” There was no way in hell that this girl would be able to bake.
“Okay fine, I got a little help from Akane…” She replied sheepishly just like I had guessed. There was no way this kid could bake, sports yes bake no. So that’s why the cakes tasted so familiar, they were probably made from Akane’s own recipes. I really should go drop by and ask her for them one day. “So… is the peace offering accepted?” She asked me curiously and I nodded back, maybe now she’ll stop being so utterly annoying. The smile she gave me though… That was another heart stopping story.
Everything was going along fine and I stopped thinking that maybe having this almost imaginary string tying us together was actually okay. Yui and I had ACTUALLY started to get along. Even Micha thought that it was a complete miracle. I guess everything sort of was thrown into chaos after I received a mail from Yui asking me to meet me at the rooftop of the school. I could kind of guess what she wanted from the whole…
Please me at the rooftop after school.
I have something that I need to tell you.
Yui
I clenched my hands before dragging myself up to the roof of the school where Yui wanted to meet me. My chest was pounding and hands sweating, I didn’t know what was going to happen. If I had known I would have probably rolled myself down the stairs and into the hospital to avoid everything. She was already up there waiting for me. It was a nice scene really having her hair waving in the wind, but of course I didn’t notice it at the time.
I walked up to her hesitantly fearful for exactly what it was that she had to tell me. I mean I had my suspicions but I would rather it not be true and she just felt like having a little nice heart to heart talk. I braced myself as I called out to her. She turned around with a troubled face and it was then that I truly became fearful. Fearful because I didn’t know what to do next if what I predicted was to come true.
She stared at me for a moment before stuttering out, “I-I’m glad you came.” Where did the stupid headstrong and rude girl that was my desk mate go? Did someone just kidnap her and replace her with a clone. Well that’s what I thought before I saw that stupid judgemental face of hers appear again. Okay so maybe it really was the same girl.
“Do you believe in love at first sight?” She asked as she continued to stare into my eyes as if compelling me to speak the truth. I shook my head, I truly didn’t believe in such a thing. I unconsciously touched my left pinky, with the ability to see such things I don’t think it was possible for me to fall in love with anyone other than the idiot standing in front of me. The thing is I don’t even know what it is to love.
“I-I know that we haven’t exactly started off on the right foot but I like you. It even comes with those stupid fuzzily lil butterfly feels. I can wait you know, until you figure it out. Can you just promise me that you’ll tell me the truth when the time comes?” The look on her face killed me, why was she being like this? Being so dreadfully considerate of me. I nodded and her gaze lingered on me one last time before walking past me and down into the dorms.
I just stood there frozen, still confused by this so called thing called love. If she’s talking about butterflies, I don’t get it but my heart hasn’t stopped beating. Mother always said that love couldn’t be truly defined and you just know it. Maybe I’m just a little slow and skeptical about this whole topic. My gut says that I could accept Yui and see where things go from there because according to string connecting the two of us, we were meant to be. We had been tied to each other for as long as I could remember.
The gods above had destined us for each other, and who am I to go against their will. Who am I to say otherwise to these confusing feelings that I have?
I thought I had everything figured out when the final plot twist happened. I felt someone embrace me and I froze, it couldn’t possibly be her coming back… “Chris… she confessed to you didn’t she?” A worried voice asked me, it was Micha but why does she sound so sad? I tried to turn around but her hold on just tightened. Worried, I asked her, “What’s wrong, did something happen between you and the two of them?” It was quiet except for the sniffles that came from her. Something was wrong, but I didn’t know what… Oh Nakatsuka Tomomi just what are you going to do?
“Tomomi… I broke it off with the two of them, you were right it was wrong for me to lead them on this whole time.” I froze as I registered what she told me, finally after so long she had broken it off with the two of them. Freed the both of them to look for the soul that they were truly linked to, perhaps that is why she feels so sad. Micha probably felt like she was losing two people that cared about her a lot. I felt her hold weaken and I turned myself around so I could hug her. “It’s going to be alright Micha, there is someone out there for you. You just have to look a little longer.” I tried to comfort her but the sniffling just wouldn’t stop.
We just stood there, I don’t know how long but I just continued to hold onto Micha tightly. I could feel her pulling me away a little and I was slightly scared of the expression that Micha had. It was the same one that Yui had a little while ago. I could feel all the warning alarms in my head going off, but I just stood there. There was truly no place for me to flee from this and all I could do was stand here head high and look her into the eye as she confessed to me.
Today just wasn’t my lucky day.
“Tomomi… I rejected the two of them because I’ve liked you for a long time. You never seemed to show any interest so I thought it’d get over it and then the two of them came along. I tried really hard, I really did but I just couldn’t make myself like the two of them. I’m sorry, even if this ruins out friendship I have to tell you. I love you.” Her eyes had started to brim with tears and I still stood there shocked. I was conflicted; I loved Micha yes but as a friend, as a sister. Then there’s the string connecting me to Yui who I had just promised a reply to.
Everything was just crashing on me and I had no idea what to do. Micha probably saw that I was confused and let go of me. “I get it… I’ll just go now. I hope we can still stay friends? I guess I just need to try harder.” She stuttered out before running off.
Great. I’ve probably ruined the day of 4 girls, just wonderful and I just getting used to this mundane life.
I dragged myself down the stairs while thinking of how much I wish she never appeared in my life. I wanted to blame her for all of this; it was bad enough with the confession but Micha… I was hurting Micha and she didn’t deserve to be hurt. Yet I knew that I would have to break her heart because the little red string that I wish I could just cut linked me with Yokoyama Yui. It was something that I just couldn’t change and if I were to be selfish and chose to make Micha happy I would be ruining the lives of all four of us. Four because somewhere out there, a person is going to spend their life making Micha happy it’s just that they haven’t been fated to meet yet.
I wish that I was never born with such a gift, and then I wouldn’t have to worry. I wouldn’t need to be in such a position and could be selfish. I could always break Yokoyama’s heart and try to mend Micha’s but I knew that I couldn’t and this is what is killing me. I knew who I wanted but doing so would only hurt the other whom I loved just as much. Why can’t the person that Micha’s destined for just show up at her doorsteps and waltz away with her. Then I wouldn’t have to be here feeling all this guilt for trying to love the person that I do.
I knew what I needed to do, and it was to talk with Micha. As hard as it seems right now, I probably can’t do anything without hurting, might as well try to lower the pain. It was all I could think of and at the time it seemed like a plan. Talk to Micha see if there was some way to salvage our relationship and then talk to Yui and give her the answer that she deserves. For now I should just sleep, maybe the sleep will numb away all this pain.
I woke up late the next morning; thankfully we didn’t have classes because I was sure I wouldn’t be able to face Yui yet. I would have to face her eventually but first I had to face Micha and it really wasn’t going to be any easier. My heart was pounding from the nervousness which was stupid considering how I usually just barge right into her dorm. Right now I’m just in front of her door trying to gather the courage to even knock. Even now I don’t know what exactly will happen to our friendship from this.
Knock knock
There I did it, my hand was still shaking when she came to open the door and let me in. I grabbed a seat on her bed trying to look anywhere but in her eyes. “Chris… you like Yui don’t you? You’re shaking and I’d hate to be the reason for it.” Micha told me sadly with tears gathering in her eyes. I didn’t even know what there was I could say, it’s not like I could deny it and go against my heart to claim that I didn’t. I pulled myself up and tried to pull her into my arms but she just slapped them away.
The look that Micha gave me killed me, “Tomomi, just give me some time alone. I’ll get over you I promise but for the time being please just stay away.” I understood what she wanted but it didn’t help the tears that were beginning to fall from my own eyes. Why is it that the gods above have to play these cruel jokes on us humans? Micha turned away from me and I left the room with my tears falling.
The door closed behind me and I don’t know how long I stood outside crying my heart out. It just wasn’t supposed to turn out this way.
Through my blurred vision I saw a figure approach me and wrap their arms around me. I didn’t care who it was and cried into their arms until the tears just stopped coming. All of this just hurt so much; this joke was just too cruel. It felt like a long time had passed when I pulled myself together to thank the person holding me. “T-thank y-“ I lifted my head to say and saw that it was Yui with teary eyes that had been holding me this whole time. That’s right; I’m not the only one that is hurting…
“Yui… I-I just can’t. I can’t do this knowing that I’ll hurt one of you.” I cried into her, no matter how much I try to figure this out at the end of the day someone was going to be hurt. “Tomomi… stop. Stop being so selfless, just chose what you want and if it isn’t me I’ll be okay with it. I promise.” I stared into her eyes and I just couldn’t do it.
In the end I had chosen her, I had chosen Yokoyama Yui who had been far too gentle with me. I didn’t regret the choice, ever since I could remember there was this little red string tying me to someone in the world. I would search and search until I grew tired but I never found them. Now that they’re here right beside me I shouldn’t allow for the chance to slip away.
I don’t want to grow old, and be one of those unhappy couples that long for someone other than the one that they have beside them.
I held onto Yui’s hand tightly as Micha approached the both of us. “Hello Nonaka-san.” Yui greeted politely as I nodded my head to Micha who just frowned. She walked up and hit me in the head with her pursue before slinging her arms over my shoulder. “Oww! What did you do that for?” I shouted, god lady do you store bricks in that bag of yours? I looked over to Yui who was chuckling and my face darkened some more. Why did I accept the confession of this evil person who won’t even protect her girlfriend?
“What~ So, Yui I’m guessing you’re dating this useless dork now that wet her bed till-“ Micha started blabbering and my eyes widened. I slapped my hand over her mouth and attempted to kill her for even starting this talk again. Every single time she just had to give people this talk. WHY!? Yui looked on with interest but didn’t comment as I wrestled Micha who was actually winning since she happened to be part giant – I mean taller than me. “Okay, okay fine I won’t embarrass you in front of your new girlfriend… for today.” She told me with a smirk and making some suspicious eye contact with m-my g-girlfriend. My face flushed as I realized just what she had called Yui.
“W-why are you here anyways!” I shouted trying to rid myself of the embarrassment. “Oh, I’m here with a friend, want to meet her? She’s cute~” Micha gushed. Wait she was gushing, does this mean she’s probably completely over me? Oh yeah, mental celebration! Both Micha and Yui gave me funny looks and I frowned. What can’t they let me have fun for one day? “Over here!” I heard Micha shouted and then I saw it this thin red line that linked the two of them. “Hey, I bought you a Dino plushy. Thought you might like it.” The girl walked over here excitedly waving this green dinosaur plushy. Oh right, Micha likes Dinos this girl sure knows how to woo her.
The two of them linked arms and Micha said, “This here is the bratty Chris, and that her girlfriend Yui. Introductions done~ Let’s go to the movies.” Micha started dragging the girl away without introducing her, what a typical Micha thing to do. The girl looked back with a sorry look before walking away with Micha. “Hey, now that they’re gone I guess we can go for our date.” Yui told me before interlacing her hand with mine and pulling me away. I took a peek at our hands and our own red strings connecting us.
I guess I did end up finding her after all.
-
Entry #24
Title: we have not touched the stars.
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Maeda Atsuko, Oshima Yuko, Kojima Haruna, Itano Tomomi, Minegishi Minami, Watanabe Mayu, Shinoda Mariko, Takahashi Minami
Word Count: 2131
A/N: Just in case you didn’t get this situation (I hope it was understandable because I know I actually don’t mention the event), this is my head-canon on AKB members at the moment Acchan announces her graduation. I did first gen, Mariko, Yuko and Mayuyu (all for obvious reasons, I hope!).
we have not touched the stars
It happens like this: This is where the evening ends. There is a start and a lull. There is screaming, words blurring together, frantic murmurs and whispers. There are people wishing, a prayer against a storm. Later media networks will explode with this news but right now under the noise there is some horror creeping in at the edges, horror and silence. There is a group of girls on a stage with mirrored expressions like their faces have been carved from the same mould. Yes it happens, it happens like this, amongst the echoing howls there is a girl standing and looking out at lights, her words both an apology and a goodbye.
I. YŪKO
It is a punch to the gut. You thrive through competition; you pride yourself on having friends who are rivals. They challenge you; they make you a better person: you’re used to this give and take, the push and shove of power and camaraderie. Acchan with those words has taken that away and suddenly you feel something give in inside of you, a dam bursting and your legs giving way. The world folds within itself like a tidal wave, the centre of a storm, the eye of a typhoon.
It has been a push and shove with Acchan ever since your team was created. The second generation had a burning spirit to overtake, to prove themselves and it still flows in you, that competitive spirit. You need to know you’re an equal. You need to know that you’re not option b because option a was taken, the last resort, the last slice of cake left on the table that no one wants to touch. You have not been validated yet though, and you are still waiting.
You know though, you know that nothing is going to be the same again. Your heart beats triple-paced, curls within itself, a scramble to figure out what is happening. You are falling backwards into reality, and the landing has just happened. It stings. It hurts. But was it too much to expect though? This snail race with Acchan, this frenzy, this fervour which has possessed your mind for the last two years.
Maybe she is tired. Maybe you are tired. You haven’t realised it yet, but maybe you will and then maybe you will leave and it will happen all over again. Maybe AKB will sink into the mud again, sink into the dregs, left to other girls to pull out and launch into the sky. All legacies die.
(It happens like this, Acchan announces her retirement from the elections and it is more than a punch, it is a beating, you feel like you have been robbed of the chance to prove yourself on that stage and show that you deserve it and you think back to last year when you had fallen apart within Mariko’s arms and realise you will never feel that again, not really, that painful feeling of wanting something just out of reach and when you stand on that stage holding the plaque reading first place with Acchan looking on with a large bouquet and tears in her eyes you think: I have lost anyway.)
II. HARUNA
Your eyes open wide and tears slide out, unconditional tears.
When people talk about this day later you just smile and nod because you’re not sure how you felt. Your mind is a blank mess, a prison of thoughts. You wanted her to tell you that she didn’t want this, that someone pushed her into it, that she wanted to stay. You wanted her to tell you that she wasn’t miserable. But she has still said nothing, and you are still confused, when you walk to her while Aitakatta plays you still don’t know what to say. Everyone has the best intentions. When she looks in your direction her smile is almost blinding, she is happy, she is relieved. Your thoughts crumple. There is nothing left to say.
III. TOMOMI
You ate out with Acchan the day before.
She had asked if you wanted to grab something to eat, the crease between her eyes deeper than normal. There is something on her mind, you had thought, but you didn’t want to push the issue so you didn’t. As she sat in front of you she looked like she was rolling words over her tongue, like she was choking on them as they tripped out of her mouth. But you knew they weren’t the right words that she wanted to say so you waited. To fill the space you talked about the concert, how it went smoothly, how surprised you were about Jurina and Milky, what clothes you’ve been buying, how delicious the food is that you’re eating, how excited you are about Tokyo Dome and isn’t it great that our dreams are finally coming true? And as you talked and talked she had sat and stared past your face, her eyes glazed over.
It’s ok to be scared you know, you had said, still thinking about Tokyo Dome. I’m terrified. It’s an admission, an acceptance of defeat, but you think it needs to be said, if only to shock her out of her silence.
I am too, she had said finally, her eyes cast downwards, a smile sliding off her lips.
It wasn’t until this moment that you realise she wasn’t talking about the Dome.
IV. MINAMI (I)
The dam bursts the fastest with you, you know what’s coming as soon as Acchan starts talking and all your emotions rise to the surface, a turbulent storm. All along Acchan has been an aggravating and inspirational figure for you. Even now hearing the opening notes of Nagisa no Cherry, the sounds of those waves brings an uneasy feeling to you, makes you feel sick to your bones. You can’t help but remember your eyes rubbed raw from crying, that feeling of total and utter insignificance. You still feel like your personality, the personality you have created for yourself was a by-product of that time; you are famous for seizing the moment, the fast talker, the entertainer. If you think back, you can probably trace it back to that moment: dancing behind Acchan’s silhouette, watching her back be illuminated by light.
Now as you watch younger members back dancing in your spot, wearing your costume you nod at them, a will and a promise that it gets better. Still though, you know it doesn’t quite work out that way. You tried to be a proper idol and failed in that sense, you aimed for becoming AKB’s top variety idol but you’re not sure if that is really you. You do have your subunit but when was that unit ever about you? You’re not really a national idol, the name AKB is famous but who is going to know and remember your name after the boom ends? What legacy have you left behind?
Acchan though has left a blazing, reluctant train, even in this moment she is shining through her tears, a halo half smeared through her dark hair. For now though, you push aside these thoughts and let it sink in that she’s leaving, she’s really leaving, she’s actually leaving and you can’t stop crying, the tears won’t stop, you’re drowning. You take steps towards her and grab her hand, ready to comfort her but you fall apart instead. She places her other hand on your face and wipes your tears away, strokes her fingers through your hair and lets you soak her shoulder. And you think to yourself, you are so glad she stumbled into your life.
(It happens like this though, AKB48 rises in fame and the stars of the first generation rise higher. You watch on the sidelines, the other one, the forgotten one, and you realise you have somehow removed yourself from an equation you can’t even solve.)
V. MAYU
It is simple. You are surprised, but not heartbroken. You believe Acchan will go onto acting or doing something, everyone knows that AKB wasn’t the end of her dream. It’s not necessarily the end of your dream either; everyone in AKB is clambering for their chance at being loved. It’s not a hard thought. You feel like after the shuffle something has broken inside of you and what was left has hardened into what you are now. Five years of being in the entertainment business has trained you well, almost too well and you can conceal everything behind an expression. You’re pretty sure you’re the real actress in AKB, growing up in front of cameras you have learnt the power of words and how much trouble showing your feelings can cause. You’ve been blasted for speaking out of line and trying to speak honestly. Now you’re guarded, you’re a fembot, hooded eyes above a pretty smile.
There is something that pulls in your mind though, a thought that catches through your whole body. You try to rein it in but it still pulls at you, it reaches out to you and whispers into your ear: this is your chance. You can crawl into that blank space, that zero. You can make the world yours; fit it in the palm of your hand, for your enjoyment, all for you. The walls are straining, but you let them cave in. It’s okay. You feel tears slide out but you’re not sure if they are tears of shock or tears of sadness or if they were just tears of show, caught in the moment. Later when you think this moment back in the future, you are still left wondering.
VI. MARIKO
You should have noticed. You should have noticed that there was something happening. Everything was still, and you know that happiness can’t last for so long. Nothing ever does.
You’ve taken to mean that it’s your duty as the eldest to naturally want to help others. You had felt something happening with Acchan for a while now but you weren’t sure enough to ask her. Sometimes you would catch Minami glancing vaguely in Acchan’s direction, a look of concentration on her face. You’d see Acchan sit by herself during rehearsal breaks, staring at the corners of the room, like she wanted to melt and join them, to flatten herself into nothing.
When she raises her hand with her shoulders squared you know. And in an instant it hits you. She was one of the girls who let you into the circle of the first generation, and for that you’ll be eternally grateful. But she is no longer the girl that you have babied and laughed with. That girl has been thrown away a long time ago, a stripped painting in the name of art. You were always so worried for her at the beginning, you knew the nightmares she was put through as the face of the group, you knew what people said about them all, and the tears that everyone cried. All you wanted was to protect everyone in the width of your arms, the wisdom of your age. Your protection alone wasn’t enough, you’ve come to realise, the Acchan of fourteen with her self consciousness and timidness is gone. There is a rigidness in her shoulders now that has been building, a practiced narrowed slant to her eyes which has been growing, a weariness encasing her whole body as she steps forward.
You do not recognise that girl anymore, but her laugh is exactly the same.
VII. MINAMI (II)
Acchan grips your hand until it turns white, an iron vice.
(You are halfway through eating your katsudon when Acchan puts down her chopsticks. I want to graduate, she says.
You choke on your food, and look up while coughing. You expect to see crinkled eyes, a laugh catching in her mouth. Instead you look up and see blank eyes, aged eyes. Acchan curls her legs onto the plastic red booth of the twenty four hour cafe you are sitting at, tucks her head on top of her legs. I’m just so tired, she says and she sways in her seat lightly backwards and forwards. The headlights of cars reflect over her body, her shoulders wracking with silent sobs. The Acchan who seemed larger than life suddenly feels so small. All the shadows are moving and you are suddenly the only still thing in the room.
You spill her coffee when your arms reach out to her. The coffee drips from the table but no one is coming. There is no one left.)
You nod, and let her go.
-
Entry #25
Title: Captain
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Oba Mina, Shimada Haruka; MinaHaruu
Word Count: 1272
Captain
We knew you’d be the captain.
From the moment Togasaki-san stepped onto that stage and announced we’d be forming Team 4, every single one of us was sure of one thing, and that was that you, Haruu, would be chosen as Captain. We weren’t sure about our Ace, but surely your captainhood was a sure thing. No-one else would even capable of such a task, at least not amongst us.
And then suddenly, we were on that stage and the announcement was being made. But it wasn’t your name that was called. It was mine. I’m Oba Mina, and, apparently, I’m Team 4’s Captain. Or at least I should be.
I didn’t expect these responsibilities, and I didn’t want them, but if Akimoto-Sensei says I have to take this role I will do. And I did, as we started practising for our 1st stage to begin, never wanting the responsibility.
And then that blog had to come to light. I mean of course it was my fault, I’d been irresponsible, but it was years ago. Still I’d let myself down. I’d let my fans down, my teammates down, I’d let you down.
I had to take responsibility, so I volunteered my suspension. What choice did I have, the fans would want me out, or at least some punishment. So I took it. I’m sure they won’t take me back. Certainly not as a captain.
I heard they made you captain in my place on the first day of the show. You deserve it more than me anyway.
You’ve been trying to call me, to message me, wanting to talk to me. You shouldn’t want to. I’m just the girl who let you all down. I feel terrible about it, I wish I could do anything to make it up to you.
The only thing I can do is take myself out of the picture. But Akimoto-sensei will call me back, I’m sure. I don’t want to be a problem for anybody. I’ve already caused everyone too much trouble. The fans will complain if I come back. I don’t want to do this anymore. Not with all the guilt.
I don’t want to do this anymore…
Suddenly it all makes sense. I know what I have to do. For your good Haruu, I need to be out of the way. I need to be gone. And I’m not happy with my life anymore anyways. At least it’s my own fault, so no-one else has to feel guilty about it. I just need to be able to do it.
“Has Mina replied to you this time?”
Haruu looked up from her phone to see most of the team looking at her with an air of concern. The answer, of course, was no.
“What do you think? I just wish she’d talk to me. I need to know that…. that… she’s alright.”
“Haruu, we’re all concerned about her, but snapping at us isn’t going to solve anything. We all know you’re worried about her, but if you can’t get her to talk to you, I think you should talk to her in person.”
“Perhaps you’re right. I think I’ll go do that. Just let me ask someone first”
Haruka went out and found Yui, the only person outside of Team 4 likely to have heard from her.
“Gomen, Haruu, but I haven’t heard fro Mina since her suspension either.”
“It’s fine, I wasn’t hopeful, but I wanted to take the chance. I’m worried about her.”
“Most of us are. But we can’t help her if she won’t let us. You’ll have to convince her I suppose.”
“I’ll go round to her place, talk to her in person. Do you have her address?”
Do I really want to do this?
I thought for sure I could do it. I’m sure I have to. Bit I’ve been sitting on this windowsill, next to this window, ready to jump, for about an hour now and I haven’t jumped yet. Maybe some part of me doesn’t want to die just yet. But I’ve caused to much trouble. This is the easiest way. Maybe I need something to push me into it. But what?
Haruka had just found Mina’s address, and was now trying to find her apartment, when she got a call on her phone. It was from Akimoto-sensei. He was telling her, in advance, that he planned to take Mina back into the group to start working properly again after the new year had happened, and he was going to tell Mina first but he couldn’t get ahold of her. Haruka ended the call, and kept on looking, now with the good news to tell Mina.
I’m not sure I can do this. I’ve been looking at the ground outside for who knows how long, and I’m still no closer to jumping. Maybe I’m being stupid with this. Time to be serious. No point in this.
What was that noise? Someone at the door? I could go answer it? Could use the company. I don’t think I want anyone to see me like this though. Wait, did I even lock the door? It’s opening, guess there’s my answer. Oh Kami. It’s Haruu. Haruu’s just burst in and I’m sat halfway through my window. I can’t deal with this. She’s angry with me isn’t she? I don’t blame her. Guess here’s my push. I’m sorry for failing everyone.
Haruka had just burst through the door, and there she could see, Mina.
“Mina, thank God. What’re you doing on there …”
Before she could finish her sentence she could see Mina seemed to be pushing herself. Through an open window. It took half a second to process what was going on. It might have been to long. She ran at her friend, and reached out with her arm.
I’m not falling. It can’t be. My arm hurts, and I kind of hit the wall. She caught me, didn’t she?
I look up at my arm, and sure enough there, holding my arm, preventing me from falling any further. My hand has barely gone below the window sill. Just how strong is she?
“Let me go Haruka. I’ve caused people enough trouble already. It’s better for you all if I’m not around”.
“Do you mean that Mina? Really? How do you think I’ll feel having just seen you fall to your death. How do you think Akimoto-sensei will feel knowing his chosen captain’s dead and the substitute’s incapable of performing because of what she’s been forced to see? There are a hundred things that’ll happen from this Mina, and nobody will benefit. Now tell me, Mina. Do you really want this?”
I look down to the ground. Nobody seems to see what’s going on. It’s awfully high, and I’m scared now. I know what the answer is. I know exactly what I want.
“No.”
I reach up to her with my other hand, and she pulls me up through the window. I smile awkwardly at her, before she hugs me and tells me Akimoto-sensei wants me back soon. She wants to take me to a hospital for now though.
“Please, Haruka, just let me stay here. With you.” She checks my arm uncertainly, running her fingers down the cuts where it hit the wall. I wince with the pain, but it’s a nice pain. The kind of pain I like. I just didn’t know it until now. I pull her into a hug, tears down my face. I have to talk to the others. And apologise for the trouble I caused them. But for now, I just need to be here with you, Haruka.
-
Entry #26
Title: A Promise for Happiness
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Kitahara Rie, Sashihara Rino; RinoRie
Word Count: 1676
A Promise for Happiness
She promised her that she would watch over her, always and all the time. While she, in return, would focus on her work- do her very best and fulfill her dreams without any worries. They thought that they would be fine continuing things that way, but after a long time of trying, Rino realized the truth. She realized that a life without Rie- no matter how fun it may seem, was still just as empty. Without Rie by her side, she can’t be the Rino she used to be.
They both would usually take almost everything lightly, even the fact that they were going be separated; apart and away thanks to this world’s cruelty. Though they were crying on each other’s shoulders as soon as her last theater concert has ended, they still managed to wipe the tears in their eyes away with a quick laugh. Rie knew that letting the person she love go- to be free to do whatever she wishes to do, to be able to do everything without worry- is the best thing she could do for her. She thought that being able to watch from afar and being contented with just that would be enough to fill her needs. Though it is painful for her part, she believed that it was a way to prove that if you truly loved someone, then no matter what happens, you would be alright. Even if there would be no more embraces, no more kisses, not even a quick exchange of smile. Much like a guardian angel who supports one person, protects her, care for her, yet does nothing about it. Because she really can’t anymore. Not when she promised that she will live without her. Some would refer her as a saint now- being able to live in such a torture to make someone happy. And damn right, she is. Because she continued on believing that after this long torture, something good will come out. Because she knew that she did the right thing. The damn right thing.
But then again, did she ever wish to become a saint? No. Did she wish to be happy, then? Of course. She knew that better than anyone else. That all she wanted was to be happy, yet why did she let her go? Her only happiness- Rino- even though she had always been within her grasp, she let her slip away. When all she needed to do was to take her hand. Grasp it. Hold it. And never, ever let go.
The answer? Of course she knew too. To Rino, she can never be selfish. If it’s what the girl wants to do, then she’ll easily give in. Even if that means throwing away her own wants, her own needs. Because Rino was the only thing she cared for- it was supposed to be for a selfish reason; just so she can be with her for as long as time allows her- but then… Rino’s not here anymore, is she?
She let Rino go to make her happy- and for a long time, she believed that seeing her happy is more than enough to make her self happy as well but… Right now, as she watches her from afar, unable to hug her or even talk to her… Even though she sees a smile on Rino’s face, is she happy about it?
No. Absolutely not.
And that’s why it hurts a little.
—
“Rino…” She trailed of, her wide eyes locked on to her and her brows both slightly raised up. With her attention only focusing to the girl before her, without even trying, she immediately knew that the girl was troubled- despite the smile on her face. “…Why are you here?”
The confident look that she wore as a façade slowly turned into bittersweet, her smile now smaller and her eyes shifting to the floor. “Aren’t you happy to see me?” Rino asked sheepishly. She found it hard to look at her straight in the eyes. After all, they both made a promise. For Rie to continue on watching over her, and for her to continue on working without turning back. Yet there she was, back to Tokyo, even though she was now assigned in Hakata. She was breaking a promise she made with her closest friend.
Rie could only turn away in response. She had nothing else to say. Judging from Rino’s reaction to her question a second ago, Rie knew that her words had stabbed her much deeper than she thought it would. And she didn’t mean that. While she couldn’t say anything, however, she felt frustration creep up on her. She tried her best- did her best to avoid her so they could concentrate to their works without worry. So they can be their selves without ever letting their minds occupy something so trivial (like missing someone) to save themselves- to save them from what they could never be, and yet…
As she watched her friend struggle in search for something to say, the smile on Rino had finally faded away. She couldn’t blame her if she’s completely speechless from her sudden appearance. But she, however, needed to say something to Rie- she wanted to shout it to her, just to get her to listen. That she’s had enough. That even after months of trying, months of moving forward blindly, she realized the truth. That life was still just as empty, just as meaningless… without her by her side.
But with her current state as it is right now, Rino couldn’t possibly voice it out yet. Not when she seems like she was about to break- not in a vulnerable state like this… Not when she looks too delicate…
“Akicha… She’s not here right now…” She said quietly, almost like a whisper, knowing that it obviously wasn’t what Rino wanted to hear. Lifting her hand up to her own shoulder, Rie continued on looking at the side as she rubbed it. She felt like hiding, she felt unsure. For some reason, she was frightened- as if the frustration she had earlier had dissolved into nothingness.
“I didn’t come to see her,” Rino took a step forward. And Rie instantly responded by taking one backward, unconsciously, in fear that she would reach out and grab a hold of her. Because she knew that once she does, she would melt, crash, and burn; she didn’t want that. Not in front of her. She didn’t want her to see- to know, that even after a long while, she still held her dearly. That she still loved her so much that she could die.
“Rie…” She said in a voice so soft, it was as if she was pleading, praying, hoping. Rie knew what she wanted. And Rino was more than willing to make it happen. Both, however, refused to admit and back down from the challenge.
“In HKT…” It was Rie who spoke, “Are you happy there?”
“It’s fun there.” She replied, taking yet again a step closer to her. The way she stared at her this time, with a gaze filled with so much intensity kept Rie in place.
Seeing that Rie made no attempts of moving away from her anymore, Rino’s expression soften, and with a final step closer, she raised her arms up. “But I’ve reached my limits…” She felt her cheek; it was warm, ethereal, beautiful… Everything about her was beautiful. She felt her neck, a pulse beating beneath her hand. Her shoulder, firm, but she knew that it would collapse if ever she held onto it too tightly.
“You’ve been watching over me, right? You can see how I’m slowly breaking…” Rie remained frozen as she let Rino pull her into an embrace, feeling the shorter girl tremble as she tightened her hug, “Rie…” Rino trailed off as her voice croaked just by calling out her name. She stiffened, but finally rested her head on her shoulder when Rie finally wrapped her arms around her. With the two of them finally together like this- RIno felt like she was complete again. As if the thing that suddenly disappeared from her had reappeared. “I’m sorry for breaking our promise but I missed you. No matter how hard I tried to hide everything with a smile, I still missed you.”
Rino’s voice was trembling, and Rie knew that she really is close to breaking. So she held her closely, taking in the scent of her hair before pressing her lips on the top of her head. To Rie, Rino’s happiness was the only thing that mattered the most to her. Even after a few months, that never changed. And even though they both made that silly promise in hopes that it would make the two of them happy, they were actually sad.
“I missed you too…”
Rie knew that letting the person she love go- to be free to do whatever she wishes to do, to be able to do everything without worry- is the best thing she could do for her. She thought that being able to watch from afar and being contented with just that would be enough to fill her needs. Though it is painful for her part, she believed that it was a way to prove that if you truly loved someone, then no matter what happens, you would be alright. Even if there would be no more embraces, no more kisses, not even a quick exchange of smile. Much like a guardian angel who supports one person, protects her, care for her, yet does nothing about it.
But she never wanted to be a guardian angel, nor a saint. She only wanted Rino to be happy, for her to be happy.
Yet, even after making a promise, neither of them were.
Ever since they were pulled apart thanks to the world’s cruely, they never were.
-
Entry #27
Title: One Bullet
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Iriyama Anna, Abe Maria
Word Count: 5349
One Bullet
The young man lies on his back, staring into the starry night sky. His eyes open to the endless possibilities of his future. It is like the very description of hopes and dreams. It is a perfect image. Someone could easily take a photo and think he was modelling as he silently star-gazed.
Except… one, he is dead. And two, he has a bloody gash across his neck where his throat used to be.
*
White plastic bodies drift around the scene, going in and out of the yellow taped area. I stand above the chalked outline of where the male’s body once was, as the crime scene investigators and forensic scientists search for valuable physical evidence.
Yet another murder. This is the third one so far. And he died in the same way as the previous two; with a deadly slash across his throat.
The very first murder reported six months ago was of a middle-aged man, found in his home. When we arrived we discovered the decrepit male sitting in a hauntingly relaxed position at his desk chair. His eyes still open, and with his mouth hanging agape, he almost looked as if he was watching something on his computer. However, from the blood-splattered monitor and keyboard, he definitely was not watching something. At first we thought it was a vicious murder that resulted from a robbery gone wrong. Except, during the autopsy, we discovered that there was a struggle and he was bound evident from the bruised wrists and small contusions dotting his rather round body. Plus, nothing was out of place and all his money and valuables were still in the house. It was as if someone just broke in, brutally killed him, then left, gaining absolutely nothing.
The second occurred only two months later with the same occurrence. However, this time the victim was only a twenty year old female student, second year in university, an honour student. Everyone was expecting much from her. Except, they did not expect that when she was walking through the wooded area leading to her home that she would be attacked, left sitting under a beautifully blossoming tree, with her throat cut and abandoned while her own blood stained her pristine white blouse. At least, that was what we deduced. However, during her autopsy, there were signs of little struggle and when we found her, her eyes were closed and her body was clear from any sign of resistance. It seemed almost peaceful. That is, except from the bloody slice across the throat.
Now, it is the third incident, which occurred last night. One month later since the last killing. Identified as a male student from a local high school, there was nothing extraordinary, except that his main hobby was star-gazing. So when someone discovered him lying on the park balcony, it seemed he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time
In all cases, there are two things in common. One, there is little to no evidence left behind by the murderer and no eye witnesses. Two, all victims died with the ‘trademark’ slash to the neck. However, nothing linked the victims nor could we connect a motive. It seemed like the only hypothesis was that it was just mindless slaughters committed by a single lunatic.
Nevertheless, there is no doubt about it. We have a serial killer on our hands and they were still roaming the streets. And it is my job to capture them.
Frustration and urgency is becoming a normal sensation within me since I was assigned this case. With almost nothing to work with, everyone on the team, especially me, were beginning to feel the apprehension and desperation. With the interval between each killing becoming shorter, there is only one question. When and where was the murderer going to strike next?
I turn when I sense someone approaching me. Even though I am surrounded by familiar faces, I keep my guard. It is one of the crime scene investigators.
“We found something.”
*
I stare at the single thread of hair in its sterilised tube, coated with the victim’s dried blood. It is a long raven-coloured strand, much different to my milk chocolate mane and the boy’s short, light brown crop. The possibility that this could belong to the murderer burned inside me, along with the haunting suspicion that the murderer is a female. This, along with a human nail chip found on the first victim’s collar and the tiny smudge of a partial fingerprint caused by an unknown substance found on the second victim’s sleeve, is the only other clue.
I enter the forensics lab but I’m not expecting much. Amongst the shimmering, state-of-the-art equipment, I see the single figure, hunching over a microscope and I can’t help but smile.
“Maria.”
The woman, recognising her name and my voice, stands and faces me. A sudden and stunning grin decorates her face, making something glow inside me and I respond with my own small smile. I head over and naturally stand next to her as she returns to analysing the nail fragment.
“How was it Anna?” she asks me.
“Not good.” I regretfully reply. “Have you looked up the DNA profiles?”
“Yes and no. As predicted, the fingernail was too small and the cells were diminished. By the time it arrived for me to analyse, it was too late to gain sufficient DNA samples.”
I nod in understanding. I knew the chance of getting a substantial sample was miniscule but that didn’t lessen my hopes that a miracle would occur. Obviously, reality was unforgiving.
“And the fingerprint?”
“No matches.” Maria replies. “And on identifying the unknown substance, it was inconclusive.”
“Crap.”
Feeling increasingly exasperated and weary, my temper is getting curter.
“However, I did some investigating in some lawless hot spots and discussing with my ‘associates’ I found some information on the murderer.”
I look at Maria and smile. She always knew how to make me feel better. However, what did I expect after being partners for five years.
“According to some,” she continues. “the murders are renowned in the criminal underground, and they are calling the killer by the name ‘Slasher’.”
Slasher? Well, that is fitting. Spurred by the new information, my confidence rises again. With this, perhaps we could get a real name for this so-called Slasher.
However, before I can investigate further, I have to hand over the single precious piece of evidence.
“Maria, you are a star.” I compliment; something I rarely do. “And as a reward, I’ll give you a present.”
She expectantly smiles and with a mischievous smirk of my own, I place the single tube in her gloved hand. Her grin grows, causing the fondness in my heart to increase, and she hurriedly goes back to her microscope. I smile and head out.
However, just at the doorway I stop.
“By the way,” I call to Maria. “stop polishing your guitar at work. You have stains all over your lab coat.”
And with the dark smudgings the last thing in my mind, I disappear to find Shimazaki Haruka.
*
The bar is gloomy and desolate. There is a stench of sour beer and foul cigarettes. If I could describe the filthiness of this dwelling, it is that, this is the place where rats come and die. However, even though any normal human being would be too disgusted to even open the mouldy door to this place, I know that some scumbags do. Unfortunately, that included me.
I enter the sorry excuse for a bar. As I walk to the counter, feeling the stickiness of the floor underneath my shoes and the stench cling to my black suit, I focus on the reason I am here.
Sitting at the worn-out counter, I watch as the elderly bartender wipes the glasses with a rather dirty looking rag, probably breaking all sorts of health violations.
“Where is Haruka?”
He doesn’t answer or even make eye contact. He just continues to wipe the murky glass in his hands. Putting my hand into my inner suit pocket, I take out and slip a ¥5000 note across the chipped surface. He pauses and putting a grimy hand over the crisp note, he answers.
“She’s upstairs.”
With a nod, I gratefully step from the counter, and head to the door leading to the stairs. Having been here a few times before, the scent of strong perfume and seduction is familiar. With a sigh, I head towards the room upstairs, where the intoxicating scent is strongest.
I knock on the door.
“Come in.” I hear the sickly sweet voice sing.
Toughening my spirit against my own reluctant heart, I enter the room. Like all my other visits, I ignore the ridiculously bright pink double bed that took up most of the entire room except from the tiny dressing table and full luxurious mirror. Everything that seems glamorous however, does not cover the stale white walls attempted to be camouflaged by the numerous posters of idols, the cracked paint, the dirty carpet and the damp mouldy corners.
I keep my eyes focussed on the slim figure sitting on the bed, with the back of a feathery strawberry red dressing gown facing towards me. Keeping silent, I watch as the women spins round, revealing that underneath the dressing gown, she is only wearing a set of purple underwear covering her womanly assets.
When Haruka realises it is me, her sweet grin instantly vanishes and is replaced by a deep scowl.
“You’re not a customer.” she says, folding her dressing gown over herself like she was trying to hide a secret.
“You know I’m not Haruka.” I answer. “Not the usual kind.”
“What do you want Anna.” she indignantly asks, standing up and setting herself at the packed dressing table.
“Information.”
“What kind?”
“The usual.”
“Then you know the cost.”
I stroll to Haruka’s sitting body and stare at her reflection. Putting my hand in my jacket pocket, I take out and flash a ¥5000 note. I see the familiar greedy glint in her eyes. In a flash, Haruka spins round and snaps it from my fingers and stuffs into her bra brashly, without any inhibition towards me. As quick as it happened, Haruka is back facing the mirror, fiddling with her many cheap make-up brands.
“What do you want to know?” she compliantly inquires.
“A new criminal. Goes by the name Slasher. Ring any bells?”
“Perhaps.”
I lean across to add a ¥5000 note onto the table, making sure to catch Haruka’s eyes and flash a smile, making her know that my presence is here. She smiles voraciously, grabbing the note and slipping it into her bra along with the other note.
“Well I remember this one man talking about his new boss called Slasher. Said Slasher was a real nut. However, he’s never seen him before. Apparently, he is supposed to go through this initiation process that all new members have to do.”
Suddenly my heart accelerates but I don’t show it on my hardened expression. However, my smile is long gone.
“Do you know where this is going to take place?” I ask, handing over another ¥5000 note, losing my patience.
“He said that he needed to go to the docks.”
“When?”
“5pm. Tonight.”
*
The car is filled with suffocating tension as I stare at the rear view mirror, while Maria sits next to me with her binoculars. After hearing the only lead we have, I rushed back to the base, picked up Maria and sped to the docks. When we arrived, it was 3:07pm. It is now 4:52pm. With each passing moment, pressure and adrenaline increases. Frequently darting my eyes around the quay car park, I keep my eyes open for any person. With the harbour deserted because of the grey stormy weather, and the car parked with the docks easily viewable, my hopes build. This could be our one and only chance to finally detain an accomplice to the murders who can lead us to the ‘Slasher’.
“Anna, there’s someone there.”
I feel my growing anticipation edge into my tight throat. I take the offered binoculars from Maria. Directing my enhanced view ahead, I scope the wooden docks, barely noticing the splashes of the raging waves.
There, standing at the very edge of the pier, I see the man. Hooded and waiting.
Quickly I call for reinforcements.
*
I edgily glance at the clock. It is 5:05pm. Backup still hasn’t arrived. Mindful that the allocated time has passed, I keep my eyes truly focussed on the unidentified man. With the dark weather and the large hoodie, I cannot clearly get a view of his face. However, from his fashion and his posture I can tell he is still young enough to not be middle-aged. Observing the scene, I notice he is looking around more frequently and becoming increasingly skittish. A fearful possibility enters me. It is only a matter of time before he loses tolerance and leaves, meaning we would lose our one and only lead.
So, with that in mind, I make my decision.
“Let’s go.”
Maria turns to me and I can sense her hesitation. However, as we stare at each other silently, she nods, once again proving her great dedication to our partnership and friendship.
We arm ourselves and as hastily, but quietly, as possible, we race up to the docks. In a matter of seconds we reach the pier, about to block the only solid path that the man could take. Maria runs ahead of me. She was always faster than me.
“Stop right there.” Maria shouts.
I physically see the suspect jump and quickly he spins round. This is finally it. My anticipation is at its all highest. However, as he turns, suddenly I halt in my tracks as a primal instinct overwhelms me. There, in his hand, I see the black outline of a familiar, dangerous object. Identical to the one in my hand.
“Maria, stop!” I hear myself shout.
However she doesn’t and then everything is deafened by the piercing gunshot.
I watch as everything turns into slow motion. I see the splatters of strawberry red spray across the floor and into the wind. I see the bullet disappear into Maria’s chest. And I see the toddling steps Maria takes until she is off the dock and falling into the sea.
“MARIA!”
I dive in. I don’t care that the suspect may escape. I don’t care if I lose our only lead. I just don’t want to lose my best friend.
As soon as I am submerged in the sea, I am taken into a new world. The waters are frighteningly dark and my eyes squint against the saltiness of the sea. Freezing is an understatement. My lungs instantly compress into tiny deflated balloons and my limbs already begin to stiffen even though I am violently swimming. Even underwater, the waves are unsympathetic and bash into my insignificant body, forcing out the little precious air I have.
I burst out of the water, gasping for much needed oxygen. However, with my frozen and violently shivering body, nothing seems to go in or out. My eyes burn sadistically but I force them open, darting my frantic gaze across the constantly shifting waters.
“Maria!” I forcedly cry; my throat already hoarse from the amount of unsanitary salt water I swallowed. My sinuses are on fire and I feel like all the water in my body has been replaced by sea water, with it dripping out from every crevice of my body. But again I shout. “Maria!”
However no one returns the call and the worst horror encompasses me. Wildly I dive back in, desperately swimming through the obscure waters with my eyes stinging aggressively. Slowly, I am being asphyxiated by the cruel sea. But I can’t give up. I just can’t.
Even when I feel my lungs tighten and my bones and muscles cry out, I keep going. Even when I feel myself becoming hypothermic, I don’t stop. And even when my sight darkens until I cannot see, I continue.
*
I don’t know when I lost consciousness but when I wake up, I realise I am in hospital and my supervisor, Takahashi Minami is sitting beside me. I am suddenly all too aware that everything was not a horrible nightmare. It happened.
They tell me that they tried their best but Maria’s body was never found.
That day I cried for the first time in eight years.
*
There isn’t time for grieving. As soon as I am able to, I leave the hospital and return to base, immediately and obsessively scouring over the evidence every day and night. Pressure is piling from the victims’ families and from the agency. The killer is accelerating and yet I do not know of their motive or their next move. I lost our only lead, which will never happen again and the only useful clues we have now, is the hair strand which does not match any of the criminals in the DNA profiles and the fingerprint made from the unknown dark substance.
I slam my hands onto the metal table, furious frustration finally etching into my skin.
Was there something I was missing? What was I overlooking?
“Agent Iriyama.” I spin round, unexpectedly caught off guard. I see one of the agents stand at the door. “We have something.”
*
Tires slide across the tarmac road as I dangerously accelerate the car.
Someone had called in about hearing sounds which were similar to screams from the abandoned office building while the caller was walking their dog this morning across the busy road. Being in charge of the case, they sent me first. My heart is pounding furiously as my inexcusable hopes begin to build once again. Even though it was now afternoon, perhaps I can find something worthwhile.
Skidding to a halt, my tires smoke dirt as I exit. I stare at the impressive building, only its skeleton left. Long have people gone and the whole area is fenced off. I hear no sounds, apart from the few cars that speed past on the street far opposite the office, where the caller must have been walking her dog. It is an eerie setting and it causes me to be on high alert, pulling out my gun.
Cautiously I enter the property, slipping through the gap in the metal fence. Entry into the building is made easy by the long rusted lock. All my senses are heightened. As soon as I enter, the smell of stale cement enters me. Glass and rubble crunch under my shoes, echoing in the man-made cavern. If I was a carnivorous predator, I would be going hungry. However, even though my steps seem unmistakably loud, I hear no other noise. If anyone was here, they were either hiding, or have already disappeared.
After investigating the wide ground floor, seeing the open stairs, I climb, keeping my gun ahead of me. Step by step, as I’ve been trained, I pause for a second to evaluate my surroundings. The quiet is unnerving but my determination drives me forward.
Finally arriving onto the next floor, I am hit by a new smell, one that is very similar to raw meat. I turn to my right and my eyes immediately land on a sight that would make normal people vomit but just makes me lower my gun.
Iron chains loop around a high beam and attached to the chain is a girl, gently swaying as she hangs by her wrists, hovering over a deep red pool of her own blood. Her tearful eyes unnaturally open and her neck dripping with blood.
I call for back up.
The stench of the blood is so strong that I can taste the copper on my tongue. Thankfully it is nearly winter, otherwise the corpse would be buzzing with swarms of flies, drinking and eating away at the bloody decaying body. It is as if someone had thrown a bucket of red paint at a mannequin.
As I scan her body with my eyes, stepping around the pool, I can see that this woman was around mid-20s, and worked within some sort of office because of her suit trousers and white shirt. However, from the body, I can tell she went through a lot before she was given death as a ‘reward’. Her clothes are ripped, as if they have been shredded and underneath welts are found on the revealed skin. Her face is cut and bruised, along with the rest of her body, from what I can see. And what is really horrid, is her feet and hands. From each of them, all digits are missing. Dismembered and dropped, left carelessly on the floor underneath her.
It is disgusting and even I am sickened by this vulgar display of complete and ruthless torture.
However, something strikes within me.
There is something different about this scene. The blood is still wet. Instantly I begin scouring the deserted floor, going through places where walls should be and searching through abandoned rooms. Suddenly I come across another a door, partly hidden by a fallen beam and broken concrete blocks. With closer inspection, I see the barely hanging sign that indicates the door used to be a fire exit and that it is slightly ajar. I am about to put my hand on the handle, when I stop. Just under my palm, where I was about to put my hand, I see the scarlet smear across the silver surface. Adrenaline begins to bump inside me and without another thought; I arm myself with my handgun and push the door open with my foot.
Cautiously stepping out into the outside, I don’t see anyone. All I see are the unsteady looking metal staircase that leads upward. Carefully, keeping my gun ready, I begin ascending.
In what feels like hours, I am on the next floor. With a swift scope, I see no one. I make my way up another flight of steps when I suddenly spot someone. My breath catches in my throat and it causes my heart to jump. The figure stands at the open balcony, looking down onto the world below. From my position, midway up the steps, even though her back is turned to me I can see that the person is female because of her sensuous curves and long black hair, tied in a neat pony-tail. The same type of hair that matched the strand at the previous incident.
With my chest pounding, I slowly make my way across. With each painstaking step I take, I am thinking that she can hear me approaching, the sound of the soft metal clangs almost deafening to me. However, supposedly too consumed in whatever she is watching or thinking, I manage to step up the stairs until I am on the same level as the person.
“Halt!” I shout, my gun held at point-blank. “Put your hands up and slowly turn around.”
I don’t even see the person flinch and I know that is person truly is the murderer. There is no doubt. She is the Slasher. The female slowly begins to turn, her raven mane twisting behind her.
My blood freezes and I am staggered, as if someone had just punched me in the stomach. This couldn’t be true.
I face the murderer, with blood splattered across her shirt and trousers, smirking as she gazes at me. The one person I would never expect. The one that has been my partner for five years. The one that was shot in front of my very eyes. The one I thought was dead.
Abe Maria.
“You wouldn’t shoot your beloved partner, would you Anna?”
I am speechless. This couldn’t be real. I was there. Maria couldn’t possibly be alive.
“You should be dead.”
The clone of Maria suddenly laughs, throwing her head back.
“Straight to the point aren’t we Anna?” she smirks, lowering her arms with ease. “It was all an elaborate set up. The guy that shot me? He was already one of my minions. Tell me, have you ever heard of a bullet proof vest and a fake blood pouch? They really are usual items.”
The shooting… was a set-up? Suddenly, my mind flashes back to the past.
The first clue, with the fingernail. A memory of a day when I saw Maria’s hand, pressed flat on the lab counter as she studied the very nail, with a miniscule chip on her middle finger.
Then, the finger print. The smudged print caused by some dark substance. The same coloured substance as Maria’s guitar polish that stained her lab coat. The same stains that I saw the very day Maria was shot.
Finally the third clue, the hair strand. The same colour and length as Maria’s thick locks. It was no wonder they couldn’t get any matches on the DNA profiles.
Maria wasn’t a listed criminal. Plus, with Maria being one of the top forensic scientists, there was no way anyone would question her findings, even though they were constantly inconclusive.
I realise that me, and everyone at the agency, had just been made a fool. Maria is the Slasher.
“You lied to me.” I hiss, tasting the venom of hate. “To everyone!”
“Well done Anna.” Maria applauded, her sarcasm making me glare and resentment intensify. “Honestly, I really should have listened to my brother and gone to acting school. But then again, if I did, I don’t think I would have had so much fun.”
Suddenly, maintaining her sinister grin, Maria slowly pulls out a formidable sized Bowie knife. The murder weapon. I can tell the blade is treacherously sharp from the way it angrily glints in the light. With one false move I know I could easily lose a hand.
However, in a matter of seconds, Maria is in front of me and blood is spurting from my arm. Luckily, my instincts kicked in and I stepped back just in time before she managed to cut deep enough to penetrate an artery.
“They don’t call me Slasher for nothing.” she laughs.
I take another step back and instantly pull the trigger. However I miss, my shooting arm screaming in excruciating agony, evident by the increased amount of blood dripping off my arm. Nevertheless, it makes Maria hesitate and slightly retreat, realising that a knife wouldn’t win against a loaded gun. Without hesitation, I fire another shot. Once again I miss, and Maria is running up the metal steps.
I give chase, my arm shrieking out in pain and my legs wobbly from the loss of blood and the shock, even though I’ve had years of training. However, with the adrenaline pumping and my burning vengeance, I don’t stop. I never will stop until Maria is down.
I fire once more and this time it’s success. I manage to shoot Maria’s hand and she cries out with pain, dropping her knife. Now disarmed, I know I can attain her. However she continues running until we are on the roof of the building. The roof is clear and the wind is vicious. However, I barely notice and I finally corner Maria against the open ledge, where she finally stops and faces me.
“Why did you do it?” I yell over the loud gusts.
“Why?” she repeats as if it was the most outrageous question. “Because I could! Who would have expected an A.K.B agent to be a serial killer? No one!”
I can tell she is on the brink of hysteria. However my blinding anger continues to burn and I am not hindered by her fatal and seriously unstable mentality. But, I allow Maria to continue, recording her confession in my memory.
“Honestly it was all too easy. Making the plan was simple and finding experienced lackeys was easy, with everything at my fingertips, I could do anything. All I had to do was look up past records of perfect crimes and the criminal data base to find disposable pawns that you arrested and seeked revenge. All I had to promise was your head. Before long, I was in charge of a criminal conspiracy which would have ended in your demise.”
“You wanted to kill me?” I interrupt, disbelief shaking me.
“Of course I did.” she coldly replies. “You being the star of the agency, I hated you. And then they made me your partner. I couldn’t even believe it. Every second I was with you, I loathed. Your attitude, your voice, your looks, your very being. I wanted it gone from my life. With you gone, I could finally be happy. But here we are.”
I can’t talk. I can’t even breathe. Yet, Maria continues. Completely uncaring and indifferent.
“The first victim was so easy to kill, an irritating nerd who didn’t know how to shut up. When I tied him and gagged him, he even continued to muffle. Finally too annoyed, when I slashed his throat he kept on gurgling. Couldn’t believe it.
Then the second one, now she was a loner. Even more than you. No true friends and no real family, I took pity on her. That was why I decided to end her sad life, so she wouldn’t suffer anymore. She didn’t even resist. I bet she’s thanking me now.
The third, well he was just unlucky. I was in a particularly bad mood that day. Actually, now that I think about it, you were the one that made me annoyed that day, making me troll through all those records until my eyes turned red. Well, he was just lying there, as if god had served him up on a platter for me to feast. So I decided to relieve my stress.”
I want her to stop, feeling my disgust in my mouth. However, Maria pays no heed.
“But then the fourth, she was a fighter. She reminded me of a lot like you. Tough, resilient, rude. It was no wonder she took so long to die. That’s why I decided to have a bit of fun with her. Hanging her up, slicing off one toe at a time, one finger at a time, until she was almost drained of all her blood. But even then she didn’t beg for her life. She just cried and mouthed me off. I had to hand it to her. Even when I slashed her throat, she managed to wrap her legs around me. If it wasn’t for her bloody screams and delaying my escape time, you probably wouldn’t have found me.”
I am dumbstruck. To think, my partner for five years, who I considered my best friend, had conspired to have me killed, by her very hands. And in the process of her insanity, decided to kill others before she got to me. Like it was a game. Evil really did come in unexpected forms. But what frightens me most is how close it was to me. The seemingly fine, perfectly sensitive, kind woman was all a façade. So well played and disguised that even I couldn’t recognise it. A deep chill runs down my spine.
I feel my hand shaking as my finger touches the trigger of my heavy gun, still pointed at Maria.
“But I’m glad you did. If I ever was to be apprehended, I knew it would be you. Though, it did take you some time.”
Maria throws her head back, manically cackling again. The insane laughter continues until it gets cut short, interrupted by my gunshot. Silence remains, as I stare at Maria’s crumbled body, the blood quickly pooling underneath her from her chest.
With one bullet, she was down.
And with another bullet, she is dead.
-
Entry #28
Title: Nakeru Basho
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Akimoto Sayaka, Masuda Yuka; SayaYuka
Word Count: 3477
Nakeru Basho
I looked at the full-body mirror inside my room as I dressed up for nothing in particular. As I grabbed the coat from the coat hanger, my eyes fell on the large lump of paper cranes hanging beside it. They were made of different colors.
I smiled softly as I touched the delicate objects and thought about the person who made all of them for me.
Yuka…
***
“You ~ are~ late~,” she said as I opened the door of her room as silently as possible.
“Sorry, they were asking for another round of rehearsals so I had to stay.” I looked at the girl’s pouted face that was very obvious due to the ugly bright light in the room. “Hey… are you mad?”
“Of course not!” she said. She looked at her lap, busily doing something. I went to the glass window and put the dark curtains aside so that we could see the view. The city lights looked soft and nice from afar.
I walked towards her and found her folding a paper crane. She had a little stack of cute origami papers by her bedside.
“Hey, what are you doing?” I asked.
“Making paper cranes,” she replied, her eyes focused on the piece of paper she was working in.
“Need help?” I tried to reach out for one paper.
“No!” She said defensively, pulling the piece of paper for me. “My wish won’t come true if you butt in.”
“Ah, okay…” We were both silent afterwards. I felt quite annoyed that I didn’t have her attention, not that I was longing for it. “Yuka, what’s your wish?” I muttered softly to myself, too soft that she could not hear. I was dying to know and if I could do something about it, I would.
I watched Yuka carefully. She had always been so passionate about her work that I sometimes felt like I’m not doing my best when I’m beside her. I watched as her eyebrows crossed due to concentration. She probably didn’t know how to make a paper crane.
“You don’t know how to fold a paper crane?”
She looked at me with a childish pout. “Acchan taught me before but I forgot,” she replied. She started murmuring the old instructions to herself. I found the focus that she gave to the project similar to that of a kindergarten who was struggling to make a project for the first time. It was a bit cute. Innocent Yuka.
“Why not ask her again?” I asked simply. Her face fell. I suddenly felt pain in my chest. She couldn’t go out of this sad hospital room and she couldn’t see her friends.
I thought I had been insensitive about my statement.
I walked toward her and pulled away the wheeled table where she was doing her handiwork. The crane was folded too many times that it looked like an ordinary crumpled piece of paper on her lap.
“Yuka?”
She heaved a sigh. “Ne, Sayaka?”
“Hmm?”
“I wonder when I’ll be able to get out of the hospital…” she looked at the ceiling with a serene face.
I didn’t know what to say. Yuka was taken to the hospital many months ago, just after she finished starring in a huge theatrical project. It was probably more painful than any of the things that I had experienced. That was the start of her dream. But the four walls of the hospital room and the tube connected to her veins suddenly stopped her from advancing further.
It made me realize that I didn’t have any idea why she was here. There were negative thoughts swirling in my mind, due to the things that happened to her when she was young.
But I didn’t want to think about those things. Yuka will get better and I would be able to sing and dance with her again.
“Soon…” I said out of impulse, patting her head. She looked at me and smiled. Her smile was so sweet. I couldn’t believe I had missed that much.
How many times have I ignored that smile because I was too preoccupied with other things?
“When I get out of the hospital, let’s go to the karaoke, eat takoyaki, meet the others…” The list of the things she wanted to do faded when I embraced her. I didn’t know why I suddenly did that. Maybe it was because of her sad eyes that said different things from her smile.
Oh, how I missed her!
“Yuka, it’s okay…” I meant that it was fine for her to cry and release everything but my own tears started to blur my vision. Everytime I visited her, I wanted to cry but I didn’t want to show my pitiful self to her.
She kept her face buried on my shirt and I felt her warm tears. “I don’t want to stay here… I want to go home…”
I rubbed her back gently. I want her to get out of the hospital too. I wished it would have been me in this state instead of her.
“Don’t worry, you’ll get out soon. And once you do, we’ll do all the things you want to do.”
“Promise?”
I gave a short laugh. “Of course. I always keep my promises.”
***
Everyday, I visited her in the hospital and watched as the pile of paper cranes grew. Before I knew it, she already had one long stack hanging from the curtain rod to the floor! She was really serious about this paper crane project.
Perhaps, she was wishing for her good health. I also did the same, visiting some shrines I pass along my way to make some wishes for her too. But again, she really beat me in her passion. Folding all of them was no joke.
I went inside the room to find dozens of paper cranes inside a big basket. A second stack of paper cranes, this time of soft pink and peach color, hung on the other side of the curtain rod. However, the room was empty. “Yuka?” I called out, searching the bathroom. She wasn’t there. I placed the flowers in the empty vase and the box of her favorite food on her bedside table.
I walked around the hospital to look for her. It could be her time for a walk or she could be in the therapy room but nevertheless, I looked for her.
I was astounded to see a very beautiful garden behind the hospital. I didn’t know about that place because everytime I visited Yuka, it was evening and we couldn’t go out.
I thought she was in this place. I roamed around, watching other patients as they chatted and walked. At the end of the garden, overlooking a river, I saw her familiar silhouette. She was doubled over, clutching on her dextrose stand as she vomited. It was a poor sight to see.
“Yuka! Yuka!” I called out, kneeling beside her and patting her back. “Are you okay?”
She didn’t face me for a while as she tried to catch her breath. After a few seconds, she looked at me and smiled. “A-OK!” she said, forming the sign with her 3 fingers.
I was not that dumb not to see that she wasn’t okay, though. I frowned at her.
“Hey, Sayaka, wipe that frown from your face. This place…” I helped her to stand up, “… is a paradise compared my room. “I could sure use some bright curtains…” She laughed.
I nodded as I looked at the scenery. It was really wonderful and refreshing, unlike the busy city and its dark smog hanging around. “You sure stayed in a nice hospital,” I said jokingly.
“Yeah,” she replied. “By the way, don’t you have work?” she asked. She pointed at my face and opened her mouth in amazement. “Probably, you came from your modeling job. Look at that sexy makeup!” She grinned before hugging me. “Sayaka, you are really gorgeous. I love you!”
I slapped her hand playfully away and cleared my mouth before she could notice the redness on my cheeks. “I came here to bring you some takoyaki,” I said.
“Really?” the old energetic Yuka returned, jumping a bit. I had to restrain her or else we might fall down. “Let’s go!” She almost started to run that I had to chase her while pulling the dextrose stand.
***
I visited the hospital the week after, carrying a paper bag. I bought some curtains, as Yuka had mentioned before. The nurse told me that she wasn’t around because of a therapy session so it was a perfect time to surprise her.
I removed my shoes and stood on top of a chair to start my work. I noticed that there were already three stacks of paper cranes, hanging side by side. I didn’t want to ruin them so I tried to work as carefully as possible, placing the new colorful curtains with difficulty.
“Tadaima…” Yuka’s sad voice greeted, a voice that was unlike the way she talked to me when I visit her. Her sudden arrival gave me a shock, making me pull on the curtain as I fell on the floor. To my horror, the hanging paper cranes fell down. I bet Yuka was horrified as well.
“No!” she shouted, standing up from the wheel chair and kneeling in front of the origami, trying to get them. “No… no…” tears started welling on her eyes as she gathered the fallen cranes.
“Yuka, I’m sorry…” I started to cry, apologizing repeatedly.
“Go away!” she screamed at me. She looked as if she lost herself, scrambling on the floor for her paper cranes. “Go away!” she repeated again, throwing one of them at me. I had no choice but to leave as the nurse guided me out of the room. I was really worried but I couldn’t do anything.
I decided not to visit Yuka after that. I was dying to go to her but I was so guilty that I ruined her tiny happiness inside the hospital room.
Was she still mad? Was she waiting for me?
My mind wandered as I watched my friends practice. Yuka was somewhere between them before. I really missed her so much. I stayed at a shadowy corner to make sure that no one would spot me crying.
My phone rang. I was surprised when I saw that it was Yuka’s number on the screen. I almost snorted as I looked at her customized picture everytime she calls! How silly. I wiped my tears and sniffed before picking up.
“Yuka…” I said. I was ready for any blow.
Gladly, her cheerful voice responded. “Sa~ya~ka!” she said cutely. “I really missed you.”
“I… I miss you too,” I replied with a soft voice. It was a bit embarrassing exchanging these kinds of messages in public.
“Hey, can you go to our favorite restaurant? I really missed their food. Can you buy me something from there?” she asked.
“But we’re still in the middle of practice,” I hissed. What was she thinking?
She sounded like a kid wanting to cry. “But you… you owe me a lot…” she said childishly.
I sighed. How could I ignore her request? “I’ll talk to them and ask if I could leave.”
“Yay!” She really sounded excited. “I love you, Sayaka!” she said again.
I gave a dry laugh before letting her drop the call. I knew that visiting Yuka meant staying with her for a long time so I just told the manager that I had to take the whole day off.
I went to the old restaurant where we used to hang out if we have time after work. It was a small, quiet place with few customers. I went to the counter to pick the food that I would bring and I was really surprised when someone covered my eyes.
“Hey, let me go!” I said, trying to hit the apprehender. The person giggled beside my ear and I felt relieved at once.
“Sayaka, you’re getting thinner!” she said as she removed her hands from my eyes. Yuka waved at me when I turned towards her.
She gasped when I suddenly embraced her. It had been weeks. However, I then realized that she was outside the hospital!
“Did you get out already?” I asked as I let go. She smiled coyly as she shook her head. “You, silly. We must go back!” I said, pulling her wrist. But she did not budge.
“Hey, that’s not good! I got outside of the hospital because I wanted to see you.”
She wanted to see me? My heart skipped a beat. This is dangerous! I looked at her and felt odd because it was the first time in months since I last saw her in casual clothes. It seemed like she made an effort with her blue dress and doll shoes.
“Yuka, I don’t know if this is a good idea…” Obviously, she escaped the hospital. She was able to drag me out of the restaurant, and we both walked. I was able to regain my senses as I inhaled the fresh air. Being with Yuka was a good thing, but I was still worried about her condition.
She was humming a tune with her wondrous voice. She then stopped and sighed. “I wanted to hate that song. It’s very sad.”
“I know.”
“But I like it, of course! Because you really led us well in that song,” she continued. “And you looked really beautiful,” she added.
I blushed. I really felt comfortable when she talked about me being beautiful. I decided to change the topic. “Hey, since you’re out, we could probably do the things you want to do.”
“Sayaka-chan, you’re a genius!” Yuka replied, squishing my cheeks. “Let’s go to the karaoke. I missed singing!”
It got me excited to go to the karaoke house with her since I also missed singing for fun, especially if it was with Yuka. We sang different songs, our own songs, our favorites, and some random novelties. She was really hyped up, jumping up and down as she sang.
“Hey, sing this song with me!” she said, forcing me to stand up as we sang what was probably the 20th song for that day.
After spending more than two hours in the karaoke, we decided to go to the nearest beach we could go to. However, Yuka suddenly staggered. I quickly went to her side to catch her.
“Are you okay?”
“Of course!” she said. She tried to be as cheerful as possible but I noticed that her eyes were wide and she was breathing rapidly.
I helped her stand up. “Let’s go back to the hospital.”
“Are you crazy? The day hasn’t ended yet!” she said in disbelief. Yuka could be very stubborn. I was really worried about her condition and if I could, I would carry her back to the hospital.
But I looked into her eyes. She was enjoying every minute of the day, I knew that. I couldn’t just end that.
I couldn’t just wipe that beautiful smile from her face.
We rode an old bus to the bayside, just as she requested. It was an hour long ride and she either spent her time poking and annoying me or standing up and looking at the scenery. It was as if she was a newcomer because of the way she acted. It was cute, though. I watched her with amusement.
“Hey, what’s funny?” she asked as she noticed me.
“Nothing!”
“You’re making fun of me,” she said, sitting down and crossing her arms. “Hmph!”
“No, I’m not,” I retorted. “I guess I’m just… glad.”
She was a bit surprised from my statement but she gave a soft smile. I tried to hide my face because I felt embarrassed about the things that I’ve said.
“Ah, we’re here!” I took her hand and we stepped down from the bus. It was already late afternoon. There were no people around; I guess they were still at work.
I gasped as she suddenly sprinted towards the shore, excited like a little child. She even removed her shoes so that she could feel the sand beneath her feet. I was still worried but she looked so energetic I even doubted why they needed to confine her in the hospital.
“Sayaka, come here!” she shouted as loud as she could. She had just finished making an ugly mound of sand.
“Ah, yes…” I muttered before running after her. She started splashing water towards me and as revenge, I did the same. We chased each other around, the hem of our clothing already submerged in the water. In a few minutes, we were both soaking wet.
As the sun set down, we both sat on the sand, looking at the orange hue it imparted to the open sea. It was a beautiful yet a sad sight. I made Yuka wear my extra clothing and wrapped her in a towel to make her feel warm. She leaned her head on my shoulder as we looked at the sunset.
“It’s so beautiful, isn’t it?” she asked in a soft breathy voice.
I just nodded in reply. I looked at her for a second and looked back to the sea. I heard her unzip her purse.
“This… is the last paper crane…” she said in between gasps. “I should finish this today.” I watched her trembling fingers as they did their handiwork.
Tears welled up in my eyes. “Yuka, you can do that tomorrow. You did a lot of things today…” I said. However, she continued to fold the lavender origami paper with difficulty.
I saw the poor piece of paper fall on the sand. She tried to get it but I took it away from her. “Sayaka…” she pleaded for it, her hands outstretched. She gave up a minute after, though.
She put her arms around me and said, “Please finish the last one for me,” she requested.
“You… you can do this tomorrow…” I tried not to cry. Was she saying goodbye already? “You said… you said your wish won’t come true if I fold the cranes for you…”
“But my wish is for you, Sayaka,” she smiled. Her eyes were sparkling with tears but she still smiled.
I looked at the paper and found a message written on it.
I wish Sayaka all the happiness in the world.
I don’t want her to be hurt. I don’t want to see her cry.
I want to see her beautiful smile always.
I wish that when I see her again, she would be smiling and shining like the sun.
I couldn’t hold back my tears as I read her wishes. How selfless! She could be wishing about her health, her life, but she did all of those things to make a wish for me. I looked at her. I couldn’t see her face but I knew that she was smiling.
If only these wishes could come true, I would wish for her to be healthy again.
“Sa…yaka…”
“Yes?” I couldn’t look at her. I tried to look afar, watching as the tall mound of sand that she created earlier got crushed by the waves.
“Will you still… like this place?”
“Of course. It’s our favorite place…”
She took my hand and held it tight. “I’m so… glad…”
I wished I could hold her hand like that forever.
I moved closer to her, leaning my head on hers, as we watched the last rays of the sun get swallowed by the sea. Her hand that was holding mine loosened its hold and fell on the sand.
I could not do anything but to hold her tight. I kissed her forehead and embraced her as I cried silently in the darkness of the night.
***
The autumn wind was cold. I hugged my coat, pulling it tighter to my body as I went to the bayside. No one was around and the place looked sad. I sat on the same spot where Yuka and I sat for the last time and looked at the setting sun.
I remembered each second of the day. Her last question swam inside my head as I looked around the silent bayside.
“Will you still… like this place?”
I wiped the first tear that came out but the next ones continued pouring down, wetting my gray coat.
Of course. It’s our favorite place.
This is the place where I can cry.
-
Entry #29
Title: Devil & Angel
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Shinoda Mariko, Minegishi Minami, Takahashi Minami, Kojima Haruna; MariMii
Word Count: 1469
Devil & Angel
In a big city, there is a famous cafe, called “Danso Cafe”. This cafe is very famous because of all of the waitress are handsome girls. Each month, this cafe hold an event to choose the most handsome and kind waitress by votes from costumers. But, there is a hopeless waitress who always loses in this event. Her name is Shinoda Mariko. She’s known as “devil waitress”, not because she is so cruel or evil, but because she is a bit sadist and her eyes are very frightening which make the costumers scared and not give any vote for her.
One day…
“Today we got a few costumers… weird…” said Takamina while waping the table.
“It’s still noon, maybe at night we will get a bunch of costumers… right, Mariko?” asked Kojiharu while waping the mugs.
“Whatever… I’m tired…” replied Mariko with annoying tone.
*cring*
Suddenly the bell near the door rang means the door opens and there is a costumer. It’s a girl, she was wearing angel outfit and looked cute. She walks cheerfully then sat on the seat near the window, waiting for a waitress to approach her.
“Wow… looks like we got another weird costumer…” Takamina whispered to Kojiharu.
“Yeah… let see if Mariko can handle this one.” Kojiharu whispered back. “Mariko! can you take care of the costumer at table number 48?” Kojiharu half shouted to Mariko who was standing near the bar.
“What? Why me?” Mariko replied.
“Well, I and Takamina a bit busy here…”
“Tsk… Okay then…” Then Mariko approached the girl and offered the menu list while hodling a note to write her order. “Welcome to Akiba’s Danso Cafe… What is your order, Ojou-sama?” She said with cool tone without a smile. Though her manager always remains her to smile to the costumers.
“Hm… What is this ‘Akiba Parfait’ thing? Is it kind of special menu?” The girl asked with a smile on her face.
“Yes… It’s like a parfait with a special touch from our chef…” Mariko answered with annoying tone this time.
“Then, what is this ‘Special Parfait’? Is it different from akiba parfait?” the girl asked again which make Mariko getting annoyed.
“Y-yes… special parfait is a parfait with special ingredients…”
“Then how about…” before the girl wants to ask again, she looks at Mariko’s sharp and deadly eyes. Normally, the costumer will get scared and stop asking about menu. But this girl just shouted “Hey what’s wrong with you!! You’re waitress right?! At least smile to your costumer!!” looks like she’s unsatisfied with this cafe service, especially the waitress, Mariko.
Mariko, who was being shouted by the weird costumer, smashed the note on her hand to the table.
*brak!!*
Then she shouted back, “This is how I work… I have been like this for long and no one protest about it… problem with that?”
The girl fought back as she stood up then pinched both of Mariko’s cheeks and forced her to smile. “smiiile~!! See? You look more handsome if you smile!” after that the girl released her hand then smiled to Mariko.
Mariko rubbed her red cheeks and making a confused plus angry face. ‘what’s wrong with this girl?! This is the first time she comes here but she’s brave enough to make a problem with me? And why she’s so care about me? I smile to the costumer or not is not her problem!’ She thought.
“Hoo.. I guess you can’t smile… that’s why you always making a scary face!” The girl smirked at Mariko.
“What did you say?!” now Mariko really get mad to the girl.
“Forget it! I’m hungry right now! I order this special parfait! Hurry up! go get it for me!!” The girl sat back and ignoring Mariko’s question.
Mariko just making an annoyed face then write the girl’s order and went to the kitchen to give the order to the chef. A few minutes later, Mariko back to the girl with a parfait on her hands. “Here is your special parfait… hope you like it” Mariko placed the parfait on the table.
“Yaay!!” the girl seems happy and then she eats cheerfully.
Before Mariko left the girl and back to the waitress room,
“I can smile, you know… I just didn’t show it to you now…tsk” said Mariko with low voice.
hearing that, the girl stop eating and look at Mariko’s face, “Hee~ then next week I will come here again to see your funny smile face” the girl challanged Mariko.
“Huh, come here as you want… I’ll show you that I can smile!” then Mariko walked away from her.
A few minutes later, the girl finished and then she went to the cashier to pay it. When she was about to left the cafe, Mariko suddenly shouted, “Hey you! Wait! What is your name?!”
The girl turned around and shouted back, “My name is Minegishi Minami! Remember that, Mariko!!” then she left the cafe.
“Wait. How did she know my name?” Mariko wondered. But then she remembered that Kojiharu had mentioned her name by half shouted. Maybe Minami heard that.
Next week…
“Hey, Kojiharu… do you realize something?” Takamina whispered to Kojiharu.
“Huh? Realize what?” Kojiharu replied with low voice.
“About Mariko… since last week, she started to smile to costumers… Isn’t it weird?”
“Hm… you’re right… maybe something happened…”
Suddenly,
*cring!*
As she had promised, Minami came back to this cafe. She was wearing the same outfit, an angel outfit. She really loves this outfit, so she uses it everytime she went to her favorite place.
“Welco-” Kojiharu was about to welcomed Minami and offer her the menu list. But, before she could do that, Mariko grabbed her shoulder and pulled her.
“I will take care of this one…” said Mariko with cool tone. Kojiharu just nodded as she and Takamina moved backward and watching at Mariko’s weird behavior.
“Welcome to Akiba’s Danso Cafe… what is your order, Ojou-sama?” This time Mariko said that with a nice smile on her face.
“Pfft… so you really trying hard to smile, huh?” Minami brust into laugh as she saw Mariko’s smile.
“Shut up… now I already proof you that I can smile…”
“Hm… but I’m not satisfied yet…”
“What!?” Mariko smashed the table.
“You have to change your cold behavior!!” Minami pointed at Mariko.
“No! Why must I!?” Mariko crossed her hands.
“Hoho, don’t say that you can’t be gentle because your ex-boyfriend make you trauma of being a good girl…”
“What did you say!? that doesn’t make any sense!!…aaargh okay okay I accept your challange! I will proof you that I can be a nice and gentle girl!!” Mariko got frustated by Minami’s statement.
“I didn’t even say that I challange you… but whatever! Now bring me the usual special parfait!” Minami smirked happily.
——-
Since the first meeting with Minami, slowly Mariko changes all of her bad behaviors and become a nice, gentle, easy to smile, love to make a joke, and handsome danso waitress. She also being loved by other costumers. Even in the next vote event, she’s surprisingly become the best waitress. Takamina, Kojiharu, and the manager of danso cafe also surprised by this result.
One day, the manager discussed about Mariko with Takamina and Kojiharu.
“What do you think, Takahashi-san?” the manager asked.
“I think a costumer had changed her…” Takamina replied.
“But you know it yourself, that Mariko never paid attention to costumers… normally she would ignore the costumer and just doing her job…” said the manager again.
“But, there is a costumer that always came every week, and every times she came, Mariko always argued with her… I don’t know what did they talk about, but I’m quiet sure that that girl is the one who changed Mariko!” Kojiharu added.
“The girl with angel outfit, you mean?!” Takamina asked then Kojiharu nodded.
“Interesting… so, an angel has changed the devil?” the manager rubbed her chin.
“Seems so…” Kojiharu answered.
“And… I think the devil has fallen for the angel…”
“Eh!? What do you mean?” Kojiharu asked.
“Do you remember the first time the angel came to this cafe? Since then, Mariko’s behavior started to change… you realized it too right? If she didn’t fall for the angel, Mariko would never do as the angel has told to her…”
“You’re right…”
“So, the devil has changed because it has fallen in love with the angel?? haha! Interesting story, guys! By the way, back to work!! The meetings are over!” command the manager.
“Okay okay” Then Takamina and Kojiharu back to their work and the manager also work in his office.
——-
‘The devil that has fallen in love with an angel, slowly changed itself to become another angel, so they can be together without any gap between them.’
-
Entry #30
Title: Between Hate and Pain, There is Love
Main Character(s)/Pairing(S): Itano Tomomi, Yokoyama Yui; Tomomi/Yui
Word Count: 3856
Between Hate and Pain, There is Love
Thief is my profession…
Swindling is my job…
I live for branded things...
I live for money…
There are two figures walking toward the same spot in the middle of the crowd. The two of them are walking from different directions. The young brunette with curly browned hair is walking from the east, she is wearing white tank top with branded brown coat and a branded bag hanging on her left arm. The other is from the west, wearing light blue T-shirt with red jacket and baggy jeans, messy beard and hair is still visible although he is lowering his cap.
“Oops, sorry” said the man after bumped into someone. While bumping into someone, he stole his victim’s wallet without them knowing. He bumps into his target once in a while, all things go smoothly.
In the middle of the crowd, a lady accidentally dropped her valuable pouch on the street, inside it is full of money. Those two figures spotted that moment and speed up their pace toward the abandoned pouch. They both grab the bag at the same time… instead of the bag, they’re holding each other’s hand. Young brunette startled and look at the person right in front of her. She finds this guy’s messy beard and raven hair is cool, and his face is handsome.
Ikemen…
Tomochin… The man also startled when he saw this girl and lowered his cap. He let go of her hands and went to pick up the abandoned pouch but the young brunette holds his arm to stop him.
“I saw it first” the brunette called Tomochin stated.
“I see… we are in the same profession” The man continues to pick up the pouch and take a look inside it, “How about we share it”
Tomochin thinks for a while and agreed. The man smirks and takes out the money inside the pouch, “One for you, one for me, one for you, one for me, … … … … … … …” he shares it until it left only one sheet of a thousand dollars.
“How about we share this $1000 in restaurant?” the man suggested.
“Not bad” Tomochin answered.
PRIIIIIITTTT (sounds of whistle)
Suddenly, two police officers came out and stopped beside the two of them. The lady who accidentally dropped her pouch appears from behind and staring at the pouch in the man’s hand. She claims that the pouch is hers and told to police that it was stolen by these couple. Tomochin is pretending to be mad and said she has nothing to do with it but one of the officer claimed that he saw them splitting the money. The officers forcefully took all the money from their hands and handed it to the arrogant lady, then they turned to face the couple.
“Sorry for being rude, but you are under arrest” The officers took out their handcuffs to take them back to police station.
Tomochin sighed and gave up on struggling, either the man. He pretended to give up on struggling and waiting for the right moment to move. Just when the officer is about to cuff the man, he stepped on the officer’s foot and sent him to the ground with one punch. The other officer is unaware with the man behind him and got attacked right behind his head. The man immediately holds Tomochin’s wrist and runs away from there.
“Wait! My bag!” Tomochin released herself from the man’s grip and went to where her branded bag is on the ground. If she keeps insisting to go back, she will definitely captured by those officers.
“Are you crazy? You’ll be captured by those officers!” the man ignored her crying. He grabbed the girl’s arm and took her away, disappeared into the crowd.
=====================
Somewhere in the street
*pant… pant…*
“Let me go!” Tomochin struggling against the man’s tight grip while her hands were still cuffed by police’s handcuffs, “Do you know that bag is all I left for living. I have nothing left beside it!” she cried.
The man withdrew his hand and kicked a wasted can near him, “Do you really want to go in jail? Is that bag worth more than your life? What the hell are you doing there?”
“None of your business!” Tomochin shouted back.
The sun is going to disappear from the horizon, street lamps were light on and some shops on the street are closing down. The man walked to the bench and sat there, taking out a cigarette from his pocket and lighted it while Tomochin is standing on her spot, not moving an inch. She stood there and crying, thinking on how will she keep living in this world.
This brunette called Tomochin is currently running away from her home. Her parents divorced and her mother married to another man. Since then, her father is always coming late and drunk. While he drunk, he often beats her, that’s why this girl decided to run away from her father. She has been running away from her father for 4 years, ever since she graduated from high school. She lives for branded things.
All started from high school, when she is longing to have a branded bag, her senior introduced her to work with her. Her senior is a swindler, her job is swindling middle-aged man’s feelings and money. They acted like they’re falling in love with their victim and told them to buy something expensive or giving them money for investment. All stupid men fall for their trick. She keeps living like that until now… unfortunately, her living fees are all being swindled by her senior. She trusts her and thinks of her as her big sister but she is just using her to earn more money. The worst thing is today, when she lost her bag and everything inside… forty thousand dollars… no place to live… no money to keep living…
Suddenly the sky is raining like it’s responding to Tomochin’s sorrow. She bent down on her knees and cried louder, blaming her life, blaming her fate, blaming on everything and also the man who rescued her. The rain is getting harder. The man gets up and walking to the girl, he took off his jacket and put it on Tomochin’s shoulder. He knelt next to her and staring at her which makes the girl feels uneasy.
“What?” Tomochin shouted.
“Don’t catch cold” the man said.
Tomoching stayed silent and glaring at the man with so much hatred. Then, something catches her attention. There’s something wrong on the man’s face. His beard is kinda… the edge of his beard dropped off from his skin? Tomochin feels curious and pulls his beard merciless with her cuffed hands.
“Ouch!!” The man cried in pain.
“As I thought, you’re wearing fake beard–” Tomochin is supposed to laugh but her eyes widen when she saw the man’s face clearly. “You are… Yui-han…”
The man called Yui-han took his beard and put it back on his face. Yui straighten himself and walked away from Tomochin, “Wait, Yui! Why you become like this? Why do you disguise yourself as a man?” Tomochin said while chasing for Yui.
If you use too many kind words, you’ll hurt me… I feel sick to hear your voice…
Yui stopped walking and shouted at her, “Why am I become like this? How can you say that after what you did to me!!!”
Tomochin stayed silent, remembered what she did to Yui…
It was four years ago when she joined her senior’s profession. She starts swindling middle-aged man for money and branded things but her desire grew more and more. She wants more than this… one day when she saw Yui being all alone in school, she approached her… offering herself to be her friend. Yui is known as a lone wolf in school and never had friends because of her quiet character. At first, Tomochin is pure offering herself to be friend with her but not after she knows Yui’s background. Yui is from wealthy family, she can have anything she want… anything but love. She has no father and her mother always being busy at work, that’s why she likes to be alone.
Yui changed when she met Tomochin and opened her heart to her. She likes the feelings that people called friendship. She began to know that she is not alone… who knows this friendship is what ruined everything around her…
Blinded by the money, Tomochin lose her way and aiming for Yui’s properties. She is being more kind to Yui, her caring is more than friend… she starts guiding Yui to the feelings of more than just friend. She leads Yui into yankee’s world, guiding her to stealing, swindling, even into drug. Yui lost herself and becoming drug dealer to pay her debt. Tomochin left her home once she graduated, Yui has no one to rely on… Some gangsters (who secretly are working with Tomochin) barged in Yui’s house to rob their money and valuable things. Her mother died to protect Yui from being beaten by those gangsters.
“Where did you go?” Yui pushed Tomochin roughly that makes her fell to the ground. “When I need you the most, you disappeared… my mother died, you ruined my life… why did you walk into my life?! I should have listened to my mother to stay away from you! I shouldn’t have listened to your sweet talks and believe it when you say you love me!!”
“Yui-han…” Tomochin stands up and walks closer to Yui but being pushed by Yui once again.
“They took all my belongings! All things around me vanished in one night! Do you know how I feel to sleep on the street for years?! You think I like wearing boys’ clothes and attach this damn beard on my face? Do you know that I almost being raped on the street by a filthy jerk!!” Yui knelt beside Tomochin and raised her fist, ready to punch her, “How can you appear again in my life like nothing happened!!”
Tomochin closed her eyes to wait for the pain but nothing happened. The rain stopped falling from sky, Tomochin opened her eyes to see tears flowing down from Yui’s eyes. Yui gritted her teeth and launch her fist on the ground, leaving Tomochin speechless. She wiped her tears and ran away with high speed.
“Yui-han… I did love you that time…” Tomochin cried.
“Hey, Lady~” Not long after Yui left, two yakuza appeared and greeted her, “Why are you being here alone?”
Tomochin is afraid of them and tries to hide her cuffed hands. She hurriedly turned back and walked faster but one of the yakuza ran in front of her, stopped her to walk further, “Wow, wow, hey brother, her hands is cuffed~” that yakuza said with a sing son.
Those two yakuza walk closer and closer to trapped her between. Tomochin is too afraid of them and her legs are trembling. She closed her eyes and keeps repeating her pray, wishing for someone to help her.
Please… someone, help me…
She felt someone grabbed her wrist and pulled her out from between those yakuza. She opened her eyes just to receive a slap on cheek. “What are you doing here? I told you to stay home!” Yui tighten her grip on Tomochin and dragged her away, “Let’s go home!”
“Wait… wait…” those yakuza stepped in front of Yui and stopped her from going further, “Hey dude, we found her first”
“Sorry, she is my girl” Yui stands in front of Tomochin protectively.
“Little missy, why don’t you go with us? We are better than this little beardy old man” one of them pushed Yui and the other is trying to get Tomochin over.
“HYAAAAA!” Yui took out her pocket knife and sliced it on the man’s arm then she launched a kick on the other man’s stomach and bringing Tomochin to run with her.
After running for an hour, they finally get off from those yakuza. Now, they are hiding inside the tunnel under the bridge. Both of them stayed silent while catching their breath after that long marathon with yakuza. Feeling the extreme awkward between them, Tomochin decided to break the ice.
“Thank you for saving me”
Yui walked toward Tomochin with emotionless face, makes Tomochin to step backward until her back attached on the wall. She moved closer until their face are really close, close enough to feel each other’s breath.
“I’m not saving you. I’m back to get my jacket” she said as she roughly took her jacket that covered Tomochin’s wet body, “Besides it, how can you repay me? You have nothing left, don’t you?”
Feels annoyed, Tomochin leaned forward to catch Yui’s soft lips. Yui was surprised at that moment and kissed back. When she came back to reality, she withdrew herself but Tomochin pushed Yui to the wall and insisting to catch those soft lips once again. This time, Yui doesn’t go easy on her. She slapped Tomochin really hard that blood is forming at the edge of her luscious lips. Looking inside Tomochin’s eyes, Yui can tell what is she going to say… somehow, she feels that Tomochin’s feeling toward her is true… but her heart is denying all the truth.
“I loved you…” Tomochin said, “I’m sorry for what I’m doing in the past… I loved you that time”
“Looking into your eyes, I know you’re lying… the words of love that coming from your mouth are too vague, they’re being abused… With just a kiss, my wrath can’t be contained… neither your kind words” Yui’s flame of hatred is burning inside her.
Yui stayed silent with her emotionless face makes Tomochin’s guilt grew heavier inside her. See no reaction from her former girlfriend, Yui took out two pieces of toothpick size metal and tuck it into the handcuffs’ key hole to release Tomochin’s hands.
“I wish I’d never met you” Yui said as she walked away, leaving the teary Tomochin.
------------------------------
Days passed… Yui is back to her daily life, walking in the crowd to steal people’s wallet, went into mart to steal some lunch or sometimes went into restaurant and had free meals… when she is unlucky, she will ended up beaten down street. At night, she will go to have some drugs… having drugs doesn’t mean that she didn’t learn from what happened to her before. It’s just she doesn’t want to face reality, she thinks that having drug will let her free from the pain of reality brings to her. All her outcome from stealing all day is only to vanish for having drug.
Meanwhile, Tomochin is secretly following Yui for the past few days. Seeing yui having life like that is too painful for her. Her guilt is growing more deeper… she can’t take her eyes off Yui… she is blaming herself, she wants to give Yui a new life, she wants to draw Yui far away from the things called drug…
She decided to work hard and earns more money to start a new life for Yui. Swindling five men in one day is risky for her to expose her identity but she has no choice about it. She doesn’t want to see Yui live like that anymore. Seeing her got beaten down street does hurt her heart, she is still in love with Yui, her feelings haven’t changed all this time. She regrets to leave her at that time, when she needs her the most… when her mother passed away and she has no one to rely on.
Today, as usual, Tomochin lured the perverted oldman to book a hotel room with her. She will take all her victim’s money when he is going to bath and leaves the room as fast as she could. Unexpectedly, when she stepped inside the room, there’s someone waiting for her. That man is her victim last time. He is sitting on the bed, half naked with a towel wrapped around his waist.
“Is she the one who stole your money?” said the man behind her.
“Yes, thank you for bringing her here” her former victim took out a pack of money and gave it to the man behind her. The man gets the money and smacks Tomochin’s butt before go out from the room.
“Last time, you stole my money while I’m taking bath. How are you gonna pay me back?” said the man while approaching Tomochin dangerously.
Tomochin threw her bag at the man’s face and went to open the door. Before she can get out, the man pulled her inside and threw her on the bed. He didn’t bother the half opened door and went over to Tomochin like a hungry wolf. Tomochin is struggling and screaming while the man pinned her down and starts kissing her neck. Tears were coming out from Tomochin’s eyes to know that she can’t win against this man’s strength. That man’s hand went to her collar and tears her shirt, revealing her smooth shoulder. Tomochin’s cried louder for help, wishing someone who passed by will some inside to help her. When she almost gives up on her hope, a loud thud can be heard and the man falls to the floor.
Yui is standing there with a wooden statue in her hands. Tomochin instantly hugged Yui and cried on her shoulder. The man hasn’t passed out and picking up his phone to call for help. Yui took off her jacket and put it on Tomochin, holding her hand and running out from the room. When they went down to the main hall, some yakuza were seen to run after them from behind. Some of them are firing the gun toward them. Unfortunately, Yui got one shot at her left thigh. With crippled leg, Yui holds Tomochin’s hand tighter and keeps running into the crowd because it’s easier to get away from them in the crowd.
They run from street to street and exhausted while those yakuza are still following them. Yui looked around and found a ramen store with half opened door. Without second think, they went inside the store and closed the door. Yui took out her pocket knife and told the owner to keep silent. Instead of stay silent, the owner went panic to Yui’s wounded leg. She immediately locked the door and offered them to have a seat while she is going to take her first aid box.
Sitting on the chair, Tomochin can tell the pain that Yui bearing. Her wound won’t stop bleeding. Desperately, Yui grabbed her jacket which is on Tomochin and searched through the pocket. She took out a pack of white powder and hurriedly opened it with trembling hands. Tomochin takes a good look at the powder and knows that is drug. Without warning, she grabbed that pack of powder and ran into washroom. She threw the drug in washtub and flushed it with water.
“What are you doing?! That’s my only pain killer I have now!!” Yui shouted.
“I will prefer to see you in pain, rather than having drug!” Tomochin shouted back.
Unable to control her desire from the drug, her body is trembling all over. She holds her throat like she is having hard time to breath, her face went pale and her lips went purple. That’s the effect from the drug, when she is not having it at the time she needs it, she will feel like dying from the extreme pain no one can tell. Out of her mind, she went to the washtub and stuck out her tongue to lick it. Tomochin prevent her from doing that and splash the water to her face, clearing her head. Unexpectedly, Yui bite Tomochin hands hardly. Tomochin bear the pain and keep splashing the water on Yui until she has calm down.
Yui is calming down and sat on the ground, leaning her back on the wall. Looking at Tomochin’s hand, Yui gently rubbing it and apologize, “I’m sorry…”
Tomochin sat next to Yui and hold her right hand and bite it hard for revenge. Yui surprised but she didn’t withdraw her hand. She stayed silent and watching the person she hates the most with gentle eyes. Tomochin release her bite after she satisfied. She lifted her head and looking straight to Yui’s eyes, she finds the same gentle eyes watching at her just like four years ago when they’re together. Tomochin shows the bite mark on her hand and at the same time, holding Yui’s hand which she bit just now.
“We look like a couple with this mark” Tomochin smiled.
“Childish” Yui said as she removed her hand from Tomochin but she won’t let Yui’s hand go.
“I still love you…”
“I hate you”
Tomochin smiled and poked Yui’s cheek, “If you hate me, how could you appear there and rescue me from that perverted old man~”
“I was just passed by... I just don’t like seeing you being seductive toward oldman” Yui looked away, don’t want to look into Tomochin’s eyes, “Your job is dangerous… don’t do it again”
“But swindling is my profession, if I give up on this… will you take care of my living fees?” Tomochin staring at Yui seductively, “Or… you want to become my only customer?”
Yui shoved Tomochin away and tried to get up but her leg is in extreme pain that she can’t move. The bullet is still in there and her wound won’t stop bleeding. Tomochin tore her worn shirt and tied it on Yui’s thigh, above her wound to stop bleeding.
“Don’t be kind to me, I hate you is a fact. My hatred at you will stay the same” Yui said.
“Whatever” Tomochin ignored her, “I still love you” Tomochin said as she tighten the knot on Yui’s thigh, makes her growled in pain. Tomochin smiled gently at her, “As long as you hate me, there’s love”
“Oh gosh…” The owner came inside washroom, “What are you doing here? Water can’t stop the bleeding. Look, you are all wet, you might catch cold like that. You help me bringing her upstairs, I will take care of her wounds and you have to change in clean clothes. I can lend you my clothes if you don’t mind, it’s not fashionable. You must be having a fight with yakuza, right? Look at your wound, that bullet in it. You should learn to behave like a normal teenager. I don’t understand young man these days, having fight out there and let her girlfriend crying for you and take care of you, … … ... … … … … … … … … … …”
“She is so nagging” Yui whispered beside Tomochin, “Can you stop her?”
“You deserve it”
If I can throw away the love in my chest, I won’t suffer… Because I love you, I hate you so much and being in pain so much… the more I hate you, the more I love you…
-
Entry #31
Title: Wordless
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Maeda Ami, Komori Mika, Sashihara Rino; Ami/Komori
Word Count: 3039
Wordless
Maeda Ami was five that year when she was introduced to both Komori Mika and Sashihara Rino. They were both students of her mother that would soon become her schoolmates. At a young age Ami was extremely shy and because of such they had decided that it was best for Ami to be brought to school with her mommy in an attempt to try and get her to socialize. Little Ami had soon grown attached to the hyperactive Rino but failed to make the same connection with Komori who was much like Ami.
Komori Mika didn’t necessarily hate making friends but rather her thoughts would always be out somewhere far away. Or for lack of better words, she was a complete natural airhead that nobody seemed to be able to understand. At the same time she was Rino’s neighbor and no matter what Rino who felt like an older sister figure to the both of allowed the two to cling onto her.
Sashihara Rino felt proud to be that older sister figure to the two of them even though Rie would constantly be jabbing her about her lack of reliability or how she was in fact a terrible influence for the two. This however only caused Rino to take her ‘responsibilities’ as the older sister figure type more seriously. Even Mama Maeda would laugh at the protective actions of Rino when the younger more playful kids had accidently scared Ami. Rino would just huff and puff saying that she would protect Ami from all the people that scared her.
That was the start of the three of them and their weird relationship.
For as long as Ami would remember the people closest to her would be Rino and by default Komori too even though she never seemed to understand the other girl. She liked her though; she knew that because Komori was really nice and would always be there for her when Rino couldn’t be. Even if she had the habit of saying random things and preferring to look at the clouds than playing with the two of them. What Ami remembers the most fondly is the fact that every year on her birthday Komori would be the first one to greet her, the first one to wish her happy birthday, hug her and then hand her some handmade present. To this very day Ami still treasures them even though after so long, she still doesn’t understand exactly what they are. Komori remembers everything about Ami, Ami knows this because that’s what everybody says in her class. “If we ever needed to find out anything about you we’d just go to Komori.” Misaki would chuckle out. Ami loves Komori and was sure that Komori loves her too even though no words would ever be needed to be spoken between the two.
Ami LOVED Rino and wasn’t afraid of showing it, ever since she meet Rino she would be clinging onto the girl. Even her own mother got jealous of how much Ami would cling onto Rino. Rino was one of the few people that Ami wasn’t afraid of talking to; in fact she wasn’t even afraid of expressing her feelings when it came to Rino. She loved Rino and she made sure that everyone knew it. As Ami grew older and Rino grew closer to Rie none of this stopped, in all honesty Ami would admit that she was jealous of Rie who she felt she was being forced to share Rino with. She would understand though and she would accept it because her precious Rino nee-chan loved Rie too. Ami was sure that Rino would be her nee-chan forever and even if Rie were to try to whisk her away that nothing between them would ever change.
Ami believed that nothing would change, but little Ami had been wrong.
Some things had to change as Rino moved on to the nearby high school with Rie, only Komori was left to accompany Ami. Although Ami had gotten better, she was still overly dependent on Rino and everyone knew this. It was only the second week when Ami ran to Rino’s house in the middle of the night crying about how much she missed her. Rino just shook her head, gave Ami a little pat and lulled the poor girl to sleep. She then phoned Komori over stating something about it being like the old times when the three of them would sleep over. Komori arrived and it was only then that Rino realized how they could no longer fit on the same bed together. For lack of better words, Ami and Komori grew into giant poles.
Rino had gotten out of the bed that she had been sharing with Ami to greet Komori. It was only then that Ami’s nightmares had started to return, Rino didn’t return to the bed to comfort her but rather she said, “You’re in charge of protecting her now, go.”
Komori gave Rino a knowing nod before slipping under the covers and pulling the shaking Ami in her arms. This was the first time that Rino started to feel out of place, as if her little sisters had suddenly grown up before her eyes. She had only been gone for two weeks yet it seemed as if it was going to be an eternity. Rino had been right; something had changed the moment that she had passed on the task of protecting Ami to Komori. Perhaps it really was a sigh of relief to have her little sisters finally grow up, that Rino didn’t know. She just knew that her job was done, she no longer had to protect Ami and this brought forth a sudden feeling of emptiness.
Ami woke up the next morning in Komori’s embrace; she was surprised but didn’t shrink away from the awakened Komori who had just been spacing out once again. “Ohayou, Komori.” Ami greeted with a yawn while pulling herself up. “Mika…” Komori muttered with a pout. All these years Komori had insisted that they called her Mika but somehow it just stuck and soon nobody was calling her by her first name. “Yes, yes Mika-chan~” Ami greeted tauntingly only to make Komori’s pout grow some more. “You two lazy asses get out of my bed right now or I’m going to kick you both out the door.” Rino barged into her own room and ordered. She had been fed up with how lovey dovey they looked in each other’s embrace and ran off last night to whine to Rie about it. She had actually only just returned hand in hand with Rie.
That had been the start of another arc in the life of Maeda Ami, without Rino she had grown closer to Komori. Even with such few words spoken between the two it seemed that they were finally able to understand each other. They didn’t even need words anymore, wordlessly Ami would go to Komori and wordlessly Komori would protect her. Komori may think on a completely different level but all that mattered to her was that Ami understood her. Not her teachers, not her parents and not even Rino.
Rino was troubled, at how much the both of them had changed the next time that she saw them. They would always be her little sisters, but still she knew that something was off. When Ami of all people didn’t run up and hug her. Rino was disappointed; she had never thought the day would come when her little Ami wouldn’t hug her anymore. Instead she could only watch as the two that stood in front of her hugged onto each other the whole time.
“Jealous?” Rie had asked her.
“I’m not allowed to be.” Rino would reply, although a bit bitterly.
Sashihara Rino would not allow herself to be jealous of the pair that she had made closer. She had no right to be jealous when she was the one that had to leave them alone. She can only stand at the side and watch as the two become enveloped in their own little world.
Rino can only watch over the two of them whilst continuing on her own road, one that had become split off from the road the two walked on.
“Komori…” Ami muttered sleepily after realizing that Komori had snuck into her bed again last night. Komori only passed her the wrapped present she placed on the tableside earlier before drifting back to bed. Ami could only smile at the sleeping figure before unwrapping the present in her hands.
Ami,
We don’t speak much to each other. Even now that you seem to be over your fear and after asking Rino about it she suggested that we write out what we have to say to each other. So this year, no homemade figure from me! It breaks my heart to ruin such a tradition but I think this will be much better for us.
Happy 16th birthday Ami.
365 letters Ami, I hope that we’ll be able to do this every day okay?
Getting letters from me will surely beat all those love letters that you’re getting from the boys!
Mika
Ami laughed at how childish the letter sounded to her before taking a look at the package she had. It was pretty simple, just a box of stationary inside and on the outside in bright pink letters it said ‘Ami’s Mailbox’. Ami knew that surely the reason why Komori was so tired next to her was because of the time she had spent decorating the box.
“I made one for myself too…” Komori whispered while taking a peek at Ami. Placing the box aside, Ami lowered herself back into the bed and cling onto Komori. “Thank you.” Ami said with a huge smile. She loved the present and was sure that it would be fun writing Komori a letter every day for the next year. That after what would feel like no time at all, Ami’s Mailbox would be filled with handwritten letters from Komori and vice versa.
Komori blushed before pulling the covers over her head.
-
Ami started to look forward to the mornings, because every day when the two of them walked to school they would exchange mails and give each other teasing smiles. It was their little secret, something that would be between only the two of them. No matter what it was that happened, every morning Ami would receive a letter. Even the time when Komori fell sick and could barely get out of bed, Ami thought that she wouldn’t be getting any letters for a while. She knew she was wrong when she saw her mother pass her a letter later that night stating that it had been in the mailbox. Ami shook her head and place the letter down before telling her mother that she would be going over to Komori’s for the night.
It had been a long time since Ami had last snuck into Komori’s room in the middle of the night. After that morning when Ami woke up next to Komori she had started to regularly sneak into her bed at night. If Komori was surprised she never showed it when she woke up the next morning with Ami literally sprawled all over her. Komori’s parents could only just sigh and turn a blind eye to their new regular house guest. They even gave Ami a key to the house so she wouldn’t have to keep on climbing up to Komori’s window.
Ami never did end up using that key though having been lectured by her parents for sneaking into the Komori household for almost a whole month just to sleep with Komori. Ami had long forgotten about where she had carelessly thrown that key when her parents banned her from going over to the Komori household. She was rather used to climbing the tree that had been conveniently placed right next to Komori’s window anyways. Despite being fairly early in the night Ami could see that Komori was already fast asleep. She could hear the bustling downstairs where the rest of the household was preparing dinner and welcoming home Komori’s older brother.
She was just about to sneak into Komori’s bed like the good old times when she was stopped by a glare coming from the owner. “I’m sick.” Komori croaked out before weakly trying to push Ami off of her bed. Ami just shook her head before forcing her way into the bed and pulling the weakened Komori into her arms. Ami stared at Komori who had flushed red from her actions before signaling for her to go back to sleep. Snuggling into Ami’s arms, Komori soon found the sleep that she too had long missed.
Ami’s parents had long stopped trying to even bother to keep Ami from Komori. They supported it really; it was just that having to wake up to their daughter trying to sneak back into their house every morning was starting to get bothersome. They saw what Ami couldn’t see, they saw how Ami’s attachment towards Komori was growing to something that would have never been possible with Rino. Mama Maeda could only sigh in relief at how things turned out with her daughter. Even though she had never managed to completely open up to everyone, at least she still had Rino, at least she still had Mika.
The mails never stopped, not even once. Even when Ami had to go out of city for a vacation with her parents every afternoon a letter from Ami would appear in Komori’s mailbox. Ami had written them all ahead of time worried that if she had written the letters all the way from Okinawa Komori wouldn’t be able to receive them on time. In return Komori faithfully left a letter in Ami’s mailbox to wait for her return.
The whole year had passed by too soon and once again Ami’s birthday was approaching as with the day to exchange their last letters. Neither of them seemed nervous as they approached each other in the morning with sheepish smiles before exchanging the letters. It was as if another normal day for the two of them, even though the contents of their letter would suggest much otherwise.
When the two of them had finally return home after a busy day of everyone, or as Komori would think of it every guy in the school approached Ami with birthday greetings and letters. Letters that Komori had promptly taken out of Ami’s arms and tossed in the recycling of course. Ami would just give her a judgmental look and brush it off like usual. To be honest she was rather glad that she didn’t have to deal with such letters.
The two took out the only letters that truly mattered to them, wondering exactly what it was that the other had or written. Or how they would react to the letter that they had written for the other. Ami gently pulled out the letter and took a deep breath before reading the familiar writing on the paper. After seeing the contents of the paper Ami gave off a laugh before grabbing a jacket and rushing over to Komori’s house. She was right out the door when she noticed a shy Komori waiting outside for her.
Komori lifted the letter in her hands with a look of confusion, “They’re the same…” Ami just pulled the girl standing in front of her into a hug, “Yes.” Komori still had a look of confusion having yet to understand the meaning of Ami’s answer or the reason why Ami’s letter seemed so similar to the one that she had written to her. “Oh…” Komori answered slowly when realization had dawned on her. Ami pulled away to see the silly smile that Komori had on her face.
“Yes. My answer is yes.” Ami said before lifting the letter that she too had been holding. On the paper there was one single question
Ami~
Will you be my girlfriend?
Mika
Rino looked at the couple in front of her with a look of pure horror. Her little baby sisters were getting married and showing off their wedding rings! She didn’t even know that they were dating in the first place. Tears started to run down Rino’s face as she started blabbering to the two about how she was a horrible sister having never noticed that the two were in fact dating for all these years. Rie just turn to give her dense girlfriend a pat on the back before turning to congratulate the two who had long started ignoring whatever Rino was choking out. Ami gave Rino a little pat on the head and a smile before saying, “Nee-chan, be my bridesmaid.”
It was a strange relationship that the three of them had, even till now when Rino is watching as her sister walks down the aisle to her other sister. Somehow it feels just right to Rino as the two of them exchange their short vows that the two had previously insisted were completely unneeded. Rino too thought that it was unneeded but had to be done to please the crowd. One could not have a wedding with just the two of them in their own world communicating to each other without words now could they?
Rino smiles as the tears begin to fall down her face as she watches and follows her sisters as they walk out of the church in happiness. She doesn’t notice whom the bouquet had been thrown to but just focused on how happy her sisters looked. She had long been done her job as the protector but she couldn’t help but feel sad that yet another layer of distance would be added between her and the two.
She sees Ami give her a wink before she turns and realize that it was her girlfriend that had caught the bouquet.
Rino thinks back to what Ami and Komori had told her the night before.
“Arigatou Nee-chan.”
-
Entry #32
Title: Words of Encouragement
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Suda Akari, Hata Sawako
Word Count: 1707
Words of Encouragement
“Watch out!”
The young patrol officer jumps before the motorcycle pushing the little girl to safety.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt?”
The little girl turned towards the voice as she heard the patrol officer’s soft voice. Her eyes lifeless. Without saying a word, the little girl stands up and walks into the crowd gathering at the scene. Shocked, the patrol officer jumps up chases after the little girl.
“Wait…”
The patrol officer’s voice was too quiet to be heard through the chitter chatter of the crowd. As she pushes through the crowd, the patrol officer finally manages to catch up to the little girl.
“What’s wrong little girl? What’s your name?”
“Akari…”
The patrol officer smiled and placed her hand on the girl’s head.
“Hey there Akari, what are you doing out by yourself? It’s dangerous out in the streets you know.”
The girl didn’t answer.
“How old are you?”
“10 years old.”
“Where’s your mother? “
“mama is… mama is gone.”
“Where did she go? What about your father?”
The girl’s eyes widened, she turned away and crouched down, hands covering her head as if she was trying to protect herself from something. The girl screamed as the patrol officer tried to calm her down.
“Hey Akari, it’s okay I’m a patrol officer. My name is Sawako.”
“Shawako?”
Although the little girl pronounced her name wrong, the patrol officer just smiled and said.
“Yes, Shawako.”
The little girl now calmed down, gave Sawako a big hug as tears ran down the side of her face. Sawako comforted Akari and reassured her that everything will be fine, and took her down to the police station where they sat down and talked a bit more.
——————-
Akari was the younger of 2 siblings. Her elder brother Toru was significantly older than Akari, and responsible for her safety whenever their parents weren’t home, which was often. Toru loved Akari, and Akari loved Toru. They were the best of friends, always played together, and laughed together. When Akari couldn’t sleep because she was afraid of the dark, Toru would always bring her a glass of warm milk and says “Yuukirinrin Akarinrin, let’s say it together Akarinrin” to give her the courage to sleep. Akari always loved hearing her brother say that, it would cheer her up. Sometimes she would just pretend she couldn’t sleep just so Toru would come comfort her. The two would always go to this small cake shop and sit by the window to eat cake and talk. They would go every year on Akari’s birthday and to Akari, there was never a better present than spending time with her brother.
——————-
“Shawa-neesan, I can’t sleep.”
After bringing Akari to the police station, the section chief ordered for Akari to be brought to an orphanage to stay the night as they couldn’t come in contact with her parents. Sawako thought it would be a bad idea, so she suggested letting Akari stay with her until they could find her parents. Akari never let go of Sawako’s hand the whole time.
“What’s wrong Akari? Would you like me to keep the light on?”
“No… can I sleep with you?”
Unsure what to do, Sawako put her arms around the little girl as she crawled up beside her in bed.
“Thank you Onee-chan, Good night.”
“Good night Akari.”
Throughout the night, Sawako couldn’t sleep. She couldn’t help but wonder why Akari was alone in the streets, and what made her so afraid.
“Toru…Toru-niichan…where are you? Don’t leave me”
Sawako felt Akari’s grip tighten, and hugged her firmly as the little girl called out in her sleep. Sawako’s worries grew for Akari, wondering what had happened to Akari’s brother and her parents as well.
——————-
“Toru-nii, where’s mama?”
“shh… Akarin you have to be strong. Mama isn’t with us anymore remember?”
“But where did she go?”
“Somewhere far away. Come on, let’s get you ready for school. If dad hears us mention mom again he’ll get mad.”
Toru handed Akari her backpack, and packed a bunch of clothing into another bag. After a while he got ready to take Akari to school, as their father walked in.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m taking her to school.”
“Oh. Bring me back some beer when you return.”
Their father, who use to be a successful politician, now nothing but a drunken old man who does nothing but sit at home. Toru walked Akari to school and said their goodbyes like usual, but this time was different. Toru put his hand on Akari’s head, gently brushed her hair and said.
“Akarin, You have to be strong okay? Remember what I use to say when you couldn’t sleep?”
“Yuukirinrin Akarinrin, let’s say it together Akarinrin!” Akari repeated out loud to make sure she remembered it properly.
“Good. Now let’s see you smile.”
Akari put on the biggest smile she could.
“That’s my girl, now I’ll see you after school. We can go to the cake shop and celebrate!”
Akari gave her brother a hug, smiled and skipped to class. Without looking back, Akari skipped all the way to class without seeing the smile fade from her brother’s face as he got up and walked away.
——————-
Five years have passed, Akari now the class idol. Always smiling, and known by her catch phrase “Yuukirinrin Akarinrin, let’s say it together Akarinrin!” Brought up by her sister who is now a high ranking police officer, Akari always tries her best to help out whoever is in need. Being at the top of her class Akari has impressed a lot of teachers.
“Hey Akari, your birthdays coming up, anything you want to do?”
“My friends told me about this cake shop down the street. That old one we use to always walk by. Can we go try it out?”
“Sure anything you want Akari.”
The two girls smiled at each other as they headed towards the old cake shop. They sat down near the window and order some cake. The two were chatting and laughing for hours before they realized.
“Hey Akarin-chan I’m sorry but we have to close early today.”
“Okay, Thank you Oji-san for letting us stay so long.”
As the two girls walked out the store, Sawako stopped. Something was wrong, she took Akari’s hand and went back into the shop. The owner, startled to see them rush back in, asked them if they had forgotten something.
“No, but I think I did find something.” Sawako said while trying to clear her thoughts.
“What is it my dear?”
“Nee-san? What’s wrong?”
“When you came over to tell us you were closing, you called her ‘Akarin-chan’ right? How did you know my sister’s name? This is the first time we’ve been in here.”
Akari after hearing this was shock and also wondered why.
“Do you know Akari from somewhere Oji-san?”
“Oh I’m sorry I must’ve mistaken her for a little girl who always came to my store a long time ago. You see, every year on her birthday, she would come with her elder brother and they would sit exactly where you two were sitting, right there. “
Sawako realizing that this old man could have known about Akari’s past because to interrogate the man about everything she could think of.
“Ah yes, they were regular customers. If I remember where I placed them, we took pictures every year. Only the brother and Akari would come, I never saw their mother, but their father was a big shot politician and was always on TV.”
The old man pulls out a dusty album from under the counter, and hands it to Sawako.
“Let’s see here, this picture was taken on her 7th birthday I believe, the year her mother passed away. Poor girl. That accident must have done quite a bit of damage to her poor heart. Gradually they came by less and less; I’m guessing it was because of their father.”
“Why would you say that?”
“About 5 years ago today. As always I prepared a special cake for Akarin-chan for her birthday, but this year she didn’t show up. Neither did her brother. Their father on the other hand came barging in demanding I tell them where they went. The man wreaked of alcohol and was really violent.”
5 years ago today. That was when Sawako first found Akari in the streets. 5 years ago she walked around with lifeless eyes and cried for her brother. Sawako had finally found a clue, something that might lead them to the truth about the past. If only the old man knew a bit more about what happened. If only..
“Shawa-nee? What’s wrong?”
“Oji-san do you remember her brother’s name?”
“oh um yes. I believe it was To…”
“HAI STOP!”
Akari now standing in between the old man and Sawako with both hands stretched out.
“Shawa-nee let’s go… I don’t want to remember… I’m happy now, with nee-san. That’s all that matters”
Streams of tears run down Akari’s cheeks as she said those words. The store was quiet, the orange glow from the sunset now barely shining through the windows.
“It’s getting late, we better go home.”
Akari opened the door and looked back at her sister and the old man with a smile.
“We’ll come back soon oji-san, I’ll bring some friends next time too!”
Akari ran off towards the car as her sister thanked the old man and chased after her. The old man closed his shop, and made his way home. He knelt down in front of a photo in his living room and bowed.
“Toru-kun, I’ve found your sister. She’s as happy as ever. She has a caring sister that loves her now. I’m sorry it took so long. But I found her, and she is safe. Everything you did to protect her, it wasn’t a waste. You can rest in peace now.”
-
Entry #33
Title: And Darling
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Nakanishi Yuka, Oya Masana, Deguchi Aki, Hiramatsu Kanako; Yuka/Masana
Word Count: 6183
And Darling
“You did what…?”
“I set you up on a blind-date.” I stared in disblief at my roommate in hopes that whatever she just said was all some big joke, that she didn’t really setup something that was more than likely to end in disaster. I don’t do blind-dates, I don’t even date, I’m awkward as hell when it comes to things like this.
The silence between us stretched on and I knew she was serious. God damn it Aki.
I groaned into my hands, how am I gonna deal with this?
“Oh calm down, it’s not like I’m sending you off to war?” Aki strutted from the doorway of my room to where I was seated at my work desk.
“I just don’t think I’m ready.” I mumbled into my hands, trying to think up as many excuses to not go, the intense dread making me sick to my stomach.
“Don’t be like that, it’s not like you’re marrying the poor girl. You’re just going out and having lunch, think of it like that.” I felt her pat me lightly on the back in hopes of convincing me, which only served to make my nerves more prominent.
“It’s been nearly a year already, I just want you to get out and have some fun, okay?” The sincerity of her voice brought me out of my own misery, I knew Aki had been worried about me ever since Rikki and I broke up; I’ve practically been like a zombie with how I just threw myself into my work.
Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.
Leaning back in my deskchair, I glanced up at Aki, giving her a small smile, “Okay, I’ll go.” She roughly grabbed my shoulder in excitement, god when did she get this strong?
“Great, great! Alright, the date is on Saturday, I’ll tell you the rest of the details later.” I watch her practically bounce out of my room before I returned to back to work, I felt a little better after our conversation but it didn’t erase the tiny bit nervousness I had in my stomach.
I hope that I don’t act like a doofus at least.
—-
If I could phase into the wall, I would have done it already, I had arrived early in hopes that I could have enough time to calm myself down but so far.
It wasn’t working.
And I was feeling so damn positive in the morning but as the day progressed, all my confidence seemed to disappear. I kept scanning the crowd in hopes of spotting my date. All Aki gave to work with was that she had simple feautres and long dark hair.
Thank you Aki, for describing nearly everybody on the planet.
Distracted with my cursing of a certain lazy roommate, I hadn’t noticed that someone had walked up to me during my internal fit.
“Um excuse me?”
Halting my mental beating of my roommate, I looked up to see a girl in front of me and wow, she was pretty.
“Are you, Nakanishi-san?”
Scouring my head to hopefully try and find any words to respond with and not keep this dumb expression on my face any longer, I gave her a stiff smile.
“Uh yes um are you Oya-san?” Mentally wincing at my own voice cracking, I’m a 23 year old women and why did this happen to me…?
“Yes, I just want to be sure I got the right person, Aki-san did show me a photo of you.”
She what? Was she setting up a blind-date or an Arranged Marriage? AND WHAT PHOTO DID SHE SHOW? Better not have been our graduation picture…
Getting back on track.
I nervously rubbed the back of my neck, a habit I have yet to break since childhood, I swallowed the giant lump in my throat, “Oh well, I guess since we’re here, we should head to the cafe already.” Oh god, did my vision just black out for a second…?
“Y-yes, of course.” Oya-san nervously shifted from where she stood in front of me, guess I wasn’t the only one feeling a little out of place.
Taking the lead, I directed the both of us to the location of our date, probably the most awkward 2 minute walk of my life.
—-
We haven’t spoken at all from the time we left our meeting spot to being seated at our table, how in the world was I gonna survive this much longer?
And judging from how Oya-san kept shifing and glancing around at everything but me, I can guess the feeling was mutual.
Starting to feel a little frustrated with myself, I at least should try to be friendly, I mean Aki went through all this trouble and I’m just doing nothing here.
“Okay, I have to be honest here,” Seeing that I got Oya-san’s attention, I pushed down that ball of nerves in my stomach, “I wasn’t looking foward to this blind-date at all, Aki set me up to hopefully get me out of the apartment and maybe try to help me get over my ex. I’m sorry if I haven’t been the greatest person from the start but instead of treating this as a date, how about we treat this as just us hanging out or something…?”
It felt like I admitted to more than I should have but it was better than just sitting in silence for who knows how much longer, I hoped that she would accept my offer.
“Okay.” Startled a little by her quick positive response, Oya-san smiled slightly at me, I could feel my chest tighten a little from it but I pushed it out of my mind.
“To be honest, I also wasn’t looking forward to this date either, I’m no good at these type of things and I kind of don’t care for them but I would like to become friends instead.” I gave her a smile of my own, the nerves that were bothering me all day disappeared along with any tension from before.
“Alright then, how about we start over, I’m Nakanishi Yuka, it’s nice to meet you.” I extended my hand across the table. ”Oya Masana, nice to meet you, Nakanishi-san.” She reached out and grabbed my hand, we shook and seperated to a new atmosphere. A friendly one.
—
“So, how did it go?” Immediately after walking through the front door, Aki nearly bum rushed me out of nowhere in what I assumed was excitement.
Throwing my keys onto the hallway table and slipping on my house shoes, I tried to condense my afternoon into a few words as I watched my roommate bounce up and down in front of me, “Great, it was great.”
Judging from her disappointed expression, I don’t think those were the words she wanted to hear.
“Great, just great? Not spectacular, wonderful, or even a ‘thank you’?
Side-stepping my way around her, I walk towards my room with Aki following closely behind, throwing more questions at me; I paused just as I stepped inside my room and turned around to face her.
“We decided to be friends and we’re meeting again tomorrow at the cafe.” I answered as I ever so slowly closed the door, I could see Aki fumbling with the words in her head and right as my door clicked shut, “So really, no ‘thank you’?”
—-
“It’s raining.”
Masana’s voice broke whatever concentration I had on the movie we were watching, I turned to where she was seated before looking over at the direction she was staring at, rain was pouring down and it looked pretty heavy too.
“I’m probably gonna have to call a taxi but I don’t feel like spending money on one.” She turned towards me and she slighlty pouted, I couldn’t help but chuckle at her childish antics but Masana did live a ways from the city and by the time she made it the station, the last trains would have left.
“Well, how about you stay over, it doesn’t look like it’ll let up anytime soon anyway?” I suggested considering it was late and we both had work tomorrow and I didn’t want her going home alone at this time, Masana feigned an embarrassed expression, “Ah Nishishi, what kind of girl do you think I am?”. I swatted my hand at her but she dodged it and grabbed hold of it, leaning against me as we laughed.
“Shut up! I mean it, I think it’s better if you stay over for tonight since it’s pouring so hard. And now that I think about it, I don’t think Aki is coming back anytime soon either.” Remembering that earlier my roommate had left to go visit her girlfriend at her apartment and hasn’t been back for hours, so she definitely was not coming back.
“You can borrow some of my clothes to sleep in.” I stood from the couch, stretching out the kinks I received from sitting down for so long. Masana following me as I turned off the tv and headed towards my room, grabbing an over-sized shirt and some shorts for her.
Turning off the lights, we both settled down in my bed, listening to the soft pattering of rain against the window. Already exhausted, I could feel my eyes growing heavier and as I was about to drift to sleep, I heard a voice break the silence.
“Nishishi, I know this may be an odd time but I really want to thank you.” I could feel Masana grasp my hand tightly, I turned my head to face her and saw that she was gazing up at the ceiling with a forlorn expression or was I imagining it because I was tired?
“You see, I haven’t had someone close to confide in for awhile, I mean, I love the friends I have and made here but,” she turned towards me with a small smile, I could feel my chest lurch for some reason but I ignored it, “I feel safe with you.”
I was at a loss for words, my dumb face must of shown it since Masana reached over with her other hand that wasn’t holding mine and patted me on the head. “Let’s get some sleep, we have work tomorrow.” And if by magic, she fell asleep in no time while I tried turning over what was just said.
It was quite overwhelming and though I felt so restless from this sudden confession, my eyes grew more heavy as my thoughts went on and on; I soon drifted off to sleep.
From the time we fell asleep till the morning, Masana and me were still able to keep our hands grasped together.
—-
It feels like my eyes could fall out of my sockets.
I was completely mentally exhausted from editing the article in front of me but I needed to get it done since I’ve been putting it off to work on the easier projects.
My office space never felt so compact as it did right now, not even when I had all those boxes from Airin’s collection when she was moving and didn’t trust putting it in a storage facility.
Ugh.
“Hey, boss!”
I turned around to see my intern, Maria, swiftly walking towards me.
She was a good kid, aiming for a journalist job to write about fashion though it seemed more like she could be featured in those magazines instead with the way she looked and dressed, I’m surprised she wasn’t a model.
Made me feel a little raggedy.
I wasn’t one to worry about those type of things, learning and writing about new and old anime and games took up most of my time anyways.
Wait, they didn’t put her with me so I wouldn’t be such a eye-sore right?
Mieko-san you can be so cruel…
“Someone’s here to see you.” Maria moved out of the way as Masana stepped into view, I felt my mood immediately take a 180.
“Oh hey! What are you doing here?” Maria silently left as Masana moved into my little cubicle, leaning against my desk.
“I figured we could have lunch together today.”
“Sounds good to me, I’m about to go crazy from sitting here all day.” I saved my work and shut off my work computer, I grabbed my bag and started following Masana out towards the elevators.
“I didn’t know you wore glasses.” Confused, I turned towards Masana to question her before realizing I still was wearing my glasses.
“Oh right, I only really wear them while working.” I made a move to take them off but she quickly stopped me.
“No, keep them on, they look cute on you.”
Now that was something new, I never really cared what I looked with or without my glasses since it just felt like an obligation but being complimented with them made me sort of happy.
“O-okay, I guess.”
As the doors for the elevator finally opened and we moved inside, I didn’t notice the small blush on Masana’s face.
—-
“What was she like?”
“Hmm?”
It was the Fall festival, Aki and Kanako had practicaly forced Masana and me to “double date” with them though as soon as we had set foot in the area, they practically abandoned us and went off to do whatever they usually do.
I didn’t really wanted to know.
So, Masana and me ended up spending our time moving from stall to stall, eating some of the food and playing some of the games. When the fireworks started up, we moved to a spot near the pond that was surprisingly empty.
Though as of right now, I’m not sure what she’s exactly asking.
“What was your ex like, I know you were together for awhile right?”
Oh.
“Um…Well, Rikki was really.. determined, always really helpful towards others and just…really kind and gentle, she was also our class representative all throughout high school too so I guess you can say she was well liked by everybody.” I could feel my chest tightned from this sudden nostalgia being brought up.
“How did you two get together, it wasn’t during high school right?” Masana continued staring up and watching the fireworks as they lit the sky in an array of colors, I wondered why she was bringing this up?
“Well, during high school, I was dating someone at the moment but we end up breaking it off around the time of my graduation. Rikki and me didn’t get together until our second year of university, we broke up last year around June.” I don’t understand why I suddenly felt so upset.
Was it because I was talking about this after trying to forget about it for so long? Or was I still longing for her?
I really did love Rikki, I knew that but I feel like that wasn’t why it felt like there was a sudden weight in my chest.
“I’m sorry, maybe I shouldn’t have brought it up.” Masana grasped my hand tightly, reaching up towards my face with her other hand and wiping away…tears?
Reaching up towards my own face, I could feel wetness on my cheeks.
When did I start crying?
I felt arms wrap tightly around my waist as Masana embaced me, I’m not sure if it was because of her comforting gesture or how I felt already from speaking early but I just start crying even more.
I’m not sure how much time had passed but when we seperated, the fireworks had already stopped and I could hear that noise from the crowd had dissipate.
“Nishishi, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you so upset.”
Taking big breaths, I could fee that the weight in my chest wasn’t there any more, “No, I think I needed that, I’ve been holding it in for awhile I guess, thanks.” We smiled at each other and embraced once more but something was different.
I was suddenly more aware of Masana; how warm she was, the small breaths I could feel on my neck as she exhaled and how her hands pressed against my back.
What was going on with me?
“We should find Akisun and Kanako, they might be worrried about us.”
“Nah, I bet they hardly even remembered we even came with them.” Separating, we made our way towards and through the crowd to the entrace of the park, I felt a small tug on my arm and glanced down to see Masana had took hold of me.
Probably so she wouldn’t get caught in the crowd but I’m not sure why I was so nervous now.
With the entrace in our sights, I could spot Aki and Kanako talking animately with one another before my roommate spotted us and yelled out, “HEY WHAT THE HECK TOOK YOU SO LONG?!”
Why are you mad, you abandoned us as soon as we got here.
Kanako laughed at her girlfriend’s antics before directing her attention to the both of us, “We should hurry, the last trains should be leaving soon.”
“You guys head to the station, I’ll walk Masana home.”
We hurried on towards the apartment building that was located across from where we were, we ended up standing outside her door for a few moments before I worked up the nerve to say something, “Hey, thanks again for earlier.”
Masana looked at me before giving me a small smile that for some reason, now churned something deep within my chest. “No problem, be safe on your way back, okay?” We hugged goodbye and I waited until I heard the door lock click before hurrying off towards the train station.
The only thing on my mind until I slept that night was how much I though Masana’s smile looked so beautiful.
—-
“Hey, whatever happened to that Akimoto girl?”
I stopped eating and looked up to where Aki was seated across from me. “What do you mean?”
She took a bite out of her sandwich before continuing, spewing crumbs, “I mean, after high school, she moved abroad right?”
“Yeah, she moved to the states, I think to study for medicine.” I took a sip of my coffee and wondered why Aki was suddenly bringing this up now?
“Hey, we’re back~!” We both turned towards the voices calling out to us, I could see Masana and Kanako returning from their shopping; they had told us they had saw something nice and would meet back up with us at the cafe.
Judging from those bags, I assumed Kanako found many nice things, looking over at Masana, she didn’t have anything with her.
“Hey, you didn’t buy anything?” Masana remained quiet for a moment then winked at me, “It’s a secret.”
“Uh.. okay then.” I just brushed off her vague response.
“So, what were you two talking about?” Kanako inquired as I returned back to my own sandwich, Aki took a big gulp of her juice before waving towards me and herself, “Reminicing about high school, by the way Nishi, what was that nickname Akimoto gave you?”
Oh god no.
Nearly choking on my food, I tried to play the dumb card, “I can’t say I recall.”
“LIAR.” Damn it, why are you only cunning in these types of situations, Aki? ”It was Chun something, Chun..Chu…OH! Chun Chun.”
That devilish grin on Aki was the most hated thing at this moment for me.
As I sat mortified in my seat, the other two occupants of this table broke out into laughter, I left that nickname behind when I graduated and with Sayaka-san when she left for the states, since she was the only who called me that to annoy me.
“Why Chun Chun though?”
I turned to see Masana trying to control her laughter, grimacing at the fact that we were still going on about this topic. “Well, I think it had something to do with Mahjong, can’t really remember throughly…”.
I have to admit, it was pretty clever for Sayaka-san to come up with such a nickname like that from something so simple.
But I still hated it.
“That was my nickname in high school mainly because Sayaka-san, an old classmate, liked to tease me. I graduated from it with Nishishi, which I prefer.” I emphasized on that last part by steadily glaring at Aki who chose to ignore me.
Damn her.
“Anyway, have you heard from Akimoto lately? I heard she got married, right?”
I remembered that email I received a few weeks back. “Yeah, I think her wife’s name was Miyazawa-san.”
Sayaka-san had met her future wife while she was interning at a clinic and had treated her though she was hesitant about dating Miyazawa-san since she was a patient. Took a lot to finally convince her and who knew it would eventually develop into marriage.
I’m happy for the both of them.
“Man, I can’t believe that Akimoto chick got married.” Aki’s whining brought me out of my thoughts, making me remember something very vital.
“Hey Aki, didn’t you use to have a crush on Sayaka-san in high school?” I could see her face completely darken from what I had just said before she started waving me off, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
Sorry, Aki, you’re not getting off this easy.
“No, I’m pretty sure you used the words, ‘SEXY’ and ‘TOTALLY BANGING BODY’ once.” If she could, I’m sure Aki would have jumped from her seat to try and strangle me but she just settled for seething in her seat.
Too bad.
As the atmosphere finally calmed down, we were able to finish our lunch in peace before Masana had to leave for work. After she had left, I could feel two pairs of eyes burning holes into me.
Now what…?
“So, Nishishi, have you told her yet?” Aki leaned over the table as Kanako nodded along in agreement. I sighed, knowing where this was going.
“No, I haven’t gotten the opportunity.” I flinched as Aki slapped the table and both of them groaned in frustration.
If you’re wondering what’s going on, well, I realized that not only did I actually like Masana but… I’m also in love with her.
I realized it around Christmas when we were tricked under the mistletoe (no thanks to Aki) and of course, I was way to embarrassed to actually kiss her so Masana just pecked me on the cheek and that feeling just stayed with me for the rest of the night but it wasn’t just that.
When I caught myself staring at her from time to time, wanting to see her pretty much all hours of the day, looking forward to our lunch dates, finding her really cute when she would fond over children or whenever she would be stingy about nearly everything and feeling like my entire body was coursing with electricity when she would smile at me.
Yeah, I had it pretty bad.
“Are you ever gonna tell her?” Frustrated as she was, Aki really was worried about me since she was afraid that I would be reluctant to admit my feelings considering what had happened between me and Rikki but no I just really suck at confessions. I remember doing one for a school play and my whole face felt like it was on fire.
Of course, it didn’t help that she gloated over the fact that her match-making skills were a success when I told her about it.
“Just..don’t rush me, okay?” Aki and Kanako both nodded in agreement and I returned to my thoughts, wondering if I’ll ever get the guts to do this.
—-
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY~!”
I chuckled as I recovered from the sudden surprise I got arriving home from work, since it was during the week I wasn’t expecting anything today.
Aki, Kanako and Masana stood in the middle of the apartment living room wearing party hats with decorations nearly everywhere, food decked out on the coffee table; for such a small party, I couldn’t have been happier.
A few hours later, my head was swimming.
I shouldn’t have let Aki, who was currently passed out on the couch with Kanako, talk me into all those drinks especially since we both have such a low tolerance.
Definitely gratefully I have no work tomorrow, don’t think I would be able to even function at all, the party was great. Aki had took advantage of my gaming system and immediately called a tournament though as much as I did play I ended up losing. About 20 matches later, she just had to turn it into a drinking game with the current results of me drunk and her passed out.
The gifts I had received were pretty great, Aki had given me about 4 new PSP games that I’d been dying to get including the new Monster Hunter, she really is a great friend when she isn’t being a big jerk; Kanako had supplied me with a new parka since my old one was practically falling apart and Masana… well, it didn’t really matter to me since her company was more than enough for me at least until…
“I need to go already.”
Turned out Masana had to leave for a few days to visit her family, I knew I shouldn’t be so selfish and wish she could stay, I just couldn’t help but already feel a little lonely as I walked her towards the door.
“Do you want me to walk you to the station?”
“No, that’s alright, I called a taxi.”
“Wow, someone’s not being stingy.”
She lightly punched me as we quietly laughed, trying to not disturb the sleeping couple in the next room, as our laughter died down the feeing of loneliness washed over me even more.
“Oh, almost forgot your gift.” Suddenly surprised by this sudden news, I watch as Masana pulled out a small box from her bag.
“Here, happy birthday, Yuka.” Blushing slightly from the rare use of my name, I gratefully took the gift, lifting the cover off the box to reveal a scarf. But as I pulled it out, I could see that it had my nickname ‘Nishishi’ embroidered on it.
“I picked up the materials with Kanako-san a few months back, it took awhile since I kept messing up the stitching. It might be a bit warm to wear a scarf now too but-” “I love it.” I cut off her rambling and pulled her into a tight hug which felt like it would last forever but of course it couldn’t.
“Ah I should go, don’t want to keep the poor man waiting.” Right as she was about to open the door, “Oh, I forgot something.” Before I could ask her what it was, I could feel hands carass my face as Masana kissed me.
It ended as soon as it began, I was too stunned to really react as she stroked my face tenderly, “I figured I could beat you to the punch.”
No way.
“Also, wear your glasses more often, okay?” Not able to will any words out of my mouth, I just nodded dumbly in agreement.
We separated and she exited through the door, I recovered enough to head outside and make sure she made it to her taxi safely. Once she was seated inside, I could see her look up and smile, waving goodbye as the taxi pulled away.
I headed back inside the apartment and towards my room, not even caring for the mess from the party.
Yeah, best birthday ever.
—-
Somehow, I got roped into running the shooting gallery for the Spring festival.
I probably should have paid attention when I was talking to Aki over the phone when she was going on about how the staff was short on volunteers this year, but I have a feeling she would have found a way of guilting me into doing it. Since the festival fell during the week I thought maybe I could get out of it by using work as an excuse but as soon as I tried to appeal to my boss, she quickly informed me that Aki had phoned her earlier and already granted me some days off, so I didn’t need to worry about it.
Mieko-san, why…?
So, I’d been stuck running the stall for awhile. Aki and Kanako had thankfully visited but as far as I was knew, I was just a small pitstop as I kept seeing them pass by with different foods each time.
Where do they get the money to spend so frivolously like that?
I wish Masana was here.
Even though I’d told her about the festival and everything, she needed to wake up early to open up shop since Kinchan was on a business trip up in Hokkaido and wouldn’t be back until next week. I never knew a flower shop had to open so early and did so much work, at least until I made the mistake of volunteering once and nearly killed myself doing almost everything. Kinchan may act air-headed but she sure knows how to take advantage of someone’s good nature.
Well, our phone-calls with one another would have to do for now.
Even though it was still early, it felt like I’d been here for hours and I noticed something since the start of the festival.
There were an unusually number of girls lined up for the shooting gallery. I’m not saying that women can’t enjoy this kind of game but I’m not kidding when there was a huge crowd of girls surrounding the stall I was running.
While the ones in queue made it blatantly obvious of their staring, the others who were up taking their turns just kept making glances at me for whatever reason while they shot at the prizes.
It was middle school all over again.
“Excuse me, are these all the prizes?” Breaking out of my thoughts, I looked over to who had called out to me and saw a young girl, probably a high school kid.
“Yes, everything you see here is a prize.” After I had explained, she seemed to be turning over something in her head before she pointed the toy rifle in my direction, “Woah, wait, I’m not a prize ma’am.”
She seemed to be disappointed but seriously, it may have just been a toy with cork bullets but those still hurt.
After that small incident, I had no trouble other than avoiding eye-contact with all the girls surrounding the stall for the rest of the night. Before I knew it, the fire works hard started up, signaling the end of the festival and thankfully the end of my exhausting night.
Waiting near the (now) closed shooting gallery stall, hoping that Aki and Kanako would hurry up so we could leave already, I was so preoccupplied with my own thoughts that I never noticed someone sneaking up behind me, “Excuse me?”
Startled, I jumped a little and quickly turned to see the very same girl who tried to shoot me earlier in the evening; what in the world was she doing here?
“Ah um yes, do you need help or something?” As I tried to calm my racing heart, I could see some kind emotion flash across her face before she returned her gaze towards me. I felt incredibly uncomfortable right now.
“I was just wondering…if you were free right now?” She took a unusually close step into my personal space, putting her hand on my arm, I tried to back away. “No, I’m waiting for a friend.”
It didn’t seem to hinder her.
“Well, how about sometime later when you are free?” Now she had both hands on me, one on my arm and other laying on my shoulder, playing with the collar of my shirt. I was really afraid now, what was I suppose to do? I’d never had to deal with something like this before.
Putting my arm between us, I tried to lightly shove her away, “Look, I have a girlfriend, so please stop?” From the corner of my eye, I saw a flash of white and looking over, I could see Masana standing a few yards away.
When did she get here?
I could see a pained expression wash over her face before she swiftly left in the direction she probably arrived in, the situation becoming clear to me. I quickly pushed the girl off of me, sternly telling her to go home before rushing off to find Masana.
It didn’t take long for me to catch up, I lightly grabbed hold of her and turned her around to face me, I could see tear streaks on her face. Pushed down the guilt that was making me sick to my stomach, I led the both of us to a more secluded area and waited until she calmed down enough, I had so many things I wanted to say right now. I wanted to reassure her that what she saw was all a misunderstanding but it was like my jaw was wired shut, I could feel my teeth ache from clenching them so hard.
The sound of her ragged breathing brought me out of my stupior, “Masana, that girl was harrassing me, I was trying to push her off.”
“I know.”
W-what?
Confused, I waited for a further explanation as she fidgeted with her hands before looking up at me, “I know that you wouldn’t do anything to hurt me but…”. Masana broke eye-contact, remaining quiet for a few moments as she rested her head on my chest. “The reason why I was so hesitant about our blind-date before…was because I was afraid, you see…the last relationship I had…t-they cheated on me.” I could feel her hands clutch my shirt tightly as she started crying again, I wrapped my arms firmly around her.
Sometime passed waiting for Masana to calm down a little before I slowly eased away, cupping her face with my hands and wiping away stray tears. “I would never do anything to hurt you, Masana, I-I love you.” Oh god, it felt like my head was about to explode but now wasn’t the time to faint.
Delicate fingers reach up to caress my face as Masana pulled me towards her until our foreheads touched, in a small voice she whispered the very same words I just confessed.
I messaged Aki soon afterwards, I told her to leave without me as I wasn’t going home that night.
—-
It was August and I was swamped with so many articles, I was pretty sure my boss was doing this deliberately just because she finds it so damn amusing.
Mieko-san, why are you so cruel…?
Maria’s internship was ending soon and with what luck she was offered a job for a pretty established fashion company run by someone she admires very much. That kid deserves it.
Luckily for me, I was able to get some time off considering I was invited to a wedding, Rikki’s wedding surprisingly. If this was a year ago, I’d probably hole myself off in my room with nothing but work to preoccupy my time, but I’m really looking forward to it. Though I told Aki that if she drinks, I was leaving her behind because I did not want to deal with her being drunk on the way back home.
It really was a beautiful wedding, they had decided on a western style one which was not surprising considering how Rikki had always wanted to be seen as a foreigner, even adopting an English name though hardly anyone called her that to her dismay. I was happy for her but judging from our old peers they must have expected me to be in shambles and were not anticipating that I would bring a date, it also didn’t help how much they kept gawking; really would you quit it?
At the reception, I was able to speak with Rikki. We discussed a few things, a few important things that invovled us and such, we both apologized in our own way about how things went down though it was probably not needed. I introduced Masana to her but surprisngly they were already aquianted, how? Well, that’s because the florist Rikki ordered her flowers from was the one Masana works at, I guess that’s why she had go to work so early for a few weeks before.
Masana and me were busy enjoying the chill night air, escaping from everyone else (and an obviously drunk Aki). How, in such a short time, did so many things happened and what were we were gonna do with Aki since we really couldn’t leave her here, no matter how much she would annoy me on the ride back.
Masana’s voice brought me out of my planning.
“Hey, I almost forgot, I have something for you.” Curious, I watched as Masana reached into her coat pocket and pulled out a bracelet. I noticed that she was wearing a similar one as well.
“What’s this?” She reached out and grabbed my hand, slipping the bracelet onto my wrist, “Let’s just say, I find rings cliche.”
-
Entry #34
Title: By the Rooftop
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takayanagi Akane, Oya Masana; MasaChuri
Word Count: 2710
By the Rooftop
Ghosts, monsters, spirits, lost souls and other things that are not visible to the naked eye- I never did believe in them. And if ever I were forced to, then I suppose I’ll just go with the typical belief of them being one of those scary vengeful beings. Of what use is there in believing such things anyway? People are only scaring themselves by inventing such stories- some even threaten their children with it. Is it so fun to watch each other turn to pale and see them cower in fear?
I’ve never seen any of those ghosts, anyway, and that’s why I never believed in them.
Still, everyone in my school insisted that they exist- and kept on saying that some even hunts within our campus; from the restrooms to the school ground. Before I knew it, the rumors had begun multiplying. Hearing it was starting to become tiresome for me, yet the others still took interest in them whenever a new one surfaced.
I planned on being one of the few who never believed in them, but as I walked up to our school’s rooftop, one day, to get a clear view of the city and the birds flying around, I saw a girl. I was thinking of greeting her, just a friendly greeting, as it was my first time meeting her, but then as she turned around after noticing my presence, she backed away a little. That’s when I noticed,
Her skin was pale, very, very pale. And she was shivering too.
I didn’t pay much attention to it at first, and continued by introducing myself. “My name’s Takayanagi Akane, from Class K. And you are?” I tried putting on the greatest smile I could, and held my hand out to her. Still, she took a step away again, eventually hitting the fence behind her before lowering her head down, letting her hair cover most of her features.
“Masana…” she finally talked before reluctantly holding her hand out as well, “Oya… Masana…”
Noticing how she made no attempts of taking my hand at all, I took the initiative and took one step closer to grab hers, but then, as though I was just reaching out for nothing but air, my hand passed through hers. My foot took a step back out of impulse, my hand retracting back to my side and my eyes widening from surprise. As I looked at the stranger before me, she continued on looking away, still shaking and her lips pursed into a thin line.
And then a thought hit me,
She’s… A ghost?
Silence engulfed the two of us for a long while. And as she continued on looking away from me, her back resting on the fence, I slowly shifted my eyes down to my hand which passed through hers. I could see it shaking already, and I can almost feel myself turning to cold- or maybe that’s just the wind.
Locking my eyes back to her direction, I immediately noticed how her eyes seemed lonely- scared, yes, but the feeling of loneliness was evident too. As a ghost, she must be feeling alone; with no one to talk to, no one by her side. Just her alone, from morning until night…
I silently cleared my throat, swallowing all of the nervousness piling up inside me. This may not be a wise idea, especially from me who never believed in them until now, but… I felt this need of making her smile, and with only that occupying my mind, I grinned to her again, trying my best to hide my fear as I once again, broke the silence between us,
“Do you want to be friends with me?”
-
Ever since then, everyday, I would run up to the school’s rooftop early in the morning. And every time I do, as soon as I open the rooftop’s door, I see her there, standing in her usual spot, either looking down towards the city or resting her back by the fence, her eyes locked up at the sky. Even though I always see the same scene again and again, it never seizes to amaze me, and so, wanting to treasure such a scene, I brought my camera with me and took a snap of her gazing up at the sky.
Hearing the camera click, she turned her head to me, and I beamed a grin at her in exchange. She seemed surprised at first, but smiled back soon after,
“Stealing a picture without even telling me?” Her smile soon turned into a mischievous grin as she slowly approached me, her hands lifting up a little as if she’s about to grab me with her fingers moving around, adding a small ‘creepy’ effect on her. “I’ll make you pay back!” she exclaimed and started running.
Even though I knew that she won’t be able to hold me anyway even if she catches me, I still ran away from her, circling around the rooftop while laughing loudly and shaking my camera to taunt her, “That’s why it’s called stealing~ You don’t steal with permission you know~” I stuck my tongue out.
“Churi! You better delete that!”
“Make me.” I stuck my tongue out again. Seeing her finally sigh in defeat, I held out a peace sign. “Churi – 10, Masanya – 2!”
“You’re lucky you’re able to run fast with that body of yours…” She muttered before resting her back on the fence again.
Every morning, we would always end up doing the same thing, running around in circles by the rooftop until one of us gives up. It seemed kind of childish, but I didn’t mind. It was fun being with her, no matter what it is that we’re doing, even if it’s just looking down at the view before us, I would still end up enjoying it anyway.
Seeing her look up at the sky again like usual, I walked beside her and raised my head up too. The sky, as it was still 5 in the morning, still had small hints of the night’s darkness on it, and with the sun slowly rising up, the dark shade too, had begun fading away; slowly, leisurely, until it completely disappeared from our vision.
After seeing a few birds pass by, I smiled a little, and then turned to her. She was still busy looking up, her side profile in complete view from where I stood. Her hair, raven black in contrast to her pale skin, covered half of it. And as I wanted to have a better view of her face, I reached my hand out slowly, reaching out to the few locks of her hair only for my said hand to pass through it.
Ah… That’s right, she’s a ghost.
“Today’s cold, isn’t it?” She spoke while rubbing her hands around her arms, heaving out a shaky sigh before pressing her back on the fence even more, “For some reason, I’m more tired than usual today, too…” she gave me a small smile, to which, for some reason, gave a small, painful pang in my chest.
I could only give her a nod in response. It wasn’t cold at all. Despite the fact that the two of us were standing by the rooftop so early in the morning, the wind was actually warm. But I couldn’t possibly say it to her. As a ghost, feeling something such as ‘warmth’ must be hard for her…
Watching her blow on her hand just so she could warm her self up, even if it’s just for a little, a small frown slowly made its way on my face, the feeling of guilt enveloping me. I wanted to help her feel warmer, I felt like hugging her, but I knew that it was useless. As I am a human, and she is a ghost, the possibility of us even touching each other was less than zero. It’s cruel, these two different worlds we both live in.
The school’s familiar chime soon echoed throughout the campus, indicating that it was time for class already. With both of us exchanging quick goodbyes, I hurriedly made my way to class. Even though it’s more fun being with her than with my classmates, I still have to attend it, after all.
“Good morning.” I greeted to everyone as soon as I opened the backdoor, only to receive the usual stares they always give me, with some of them still refusing to even turn their heads towards my direction. It was always like this- me always being the one left out- that’s why I want to believe that I understand how Masana feels- because both of us are always alone.
As I made my way to my desk, I noticed that one of my classmates still had her eyes locked at me.
Yagami Kumi. Out of everyone, she’s always been the only one kind enough to give me a smile and a nod whenever I walk inside the room. Of course, I would beam out a smile back at her too, but aside from this small greeting, we never talked with each other. I’m grateful to her though, at least I know that a classmate of mine still acknowledges my existence.
As soon as our class ended, I walked out from the classroom and made my way to the rooftop, hoping to see her there, waiting for me like how it always have been. To my surprise, however, I couldn’t see her anywhere.
“Masanya?”
I called out, but there was no reply, so I just sat down on a ledge by the fence she used to lean on a lot and looked up at the sky. And as time passed, what used to be a yellow-ish sky soon turned darker. Is this the view that Masana always sees, I wonder? Sometimes, I can’t help but question as to what it is that she’s trying to search up there.
The rooftop’s door made a quiet creak as it opened, immediately taking my attention as I turned my head towards its direction.
Behind it stood Masana. Her eyes locked on the ground with her hair covering her eyes, just like how it was when I first saw her.
“Churi… Can you come with me for a second?”
-
The two of us stood inside the library. It was dark, but Masana insisted that we don’t turn any lights on as it might catch the security guard’s attention. To which I immediately agreed on. A book was lying down in front of us, and with only the moon’s glow as our light, Masana held her hand out to it and flipped through its pages.
It surprised me- to see her actually touch a thing. Ghosts aren’t supposed to be able to touch things, are they? Unless the rumors are false, of course.
“Churi.” I turned my head to her, my brows lifting up. For some reason, she looked as though she was hurt, with her eyes casting down and her brows knitted to the middle, “If you don’t mind… Can you read what’s written here..?”
I nodded my head, and slowly turned to the book. The first thing I noticed was how a small picture of my face was there, on what seemed to be a cut-out of a newspaper, stuck on this book for everyone to see. I smiled a little, letting out a confused ‘Eh?’ as I continued to read the texts below it.
October 1, 2011.
Takayanagi Akane, a student of the well-known Sakae all-girls Academy, was discovered dead after school when one of her classmates approached her to ‘wake her up’. The student who found out that she was dead explained that earlier that day, the girl was feeling bad, so she took a nap on her desk- but never woke up ever since. Further report sa-
I ignored whatever was written next, taking as many steps as I could away from the book out of fear.
Is this some kind of a sick joke?
“Churi-”
I looked up at Masana, but my vision was already too blurry as tears began to uncontrollably pile up in my eyes. “Th-This is a joke, right?” My voice sounded as if it was about to disappear- hoarse and in a whisper. “I- I mean, everyone still looks at my direction when I walk inside the class. Yagami Kumi seems like she can see me too! I can’t- I’m not dead. I’m here! I’m right here, so there’s no way…”
“Churi, listen!” I jumped up a little. It was the first time I heard her snap at me, “They weren’t looking at your direction… They… They were wondering why the door would suddenly open and close… Yagami though… Well, she’s special. You’ve heard of the rumors right? That she can see ghosts…”
“Then my camera-”
“You were holding the camera tightly in your hand when you died…”
Taking a deep breath in, I hurriedly wiped the tears in my eyes away before they could fall down. But it was already too late. Even though I was able to wipe away those that gathered, one by one, they started on falling down from my eyes anyway. “I-” my voice croaked, but still, I continued after breathing in. “No… This is a lie.”
I shook my head repetitively as I took a few more steps back, eventually collapsing down on the ground slowly as all of my strength seemed to have left me.
Now that I think about it, everything makes sense this way. How nobody seems to notice me, how when we first met, Masana seemed like she was freaked out- she wasn’t scared because a human noticed her- she was scared because there was a ghost standing before her.
“We’ll meet again though, I’m sure of it.”
“Eh…?” I looked at her, puzzled, and then down to my feet.
I’m… I’m disappearing?
“I’m sorry if I didn’t tell you immediately, Churi. I was actually… Planning of keeping this fact to myself… So I can spend more time with you. But I realized… Seeing you feeling like you’ve been ignored by your classmates, watching you spend the day innocently without even knowing the truth… It must be painful for you.”
“But it’s fine! I… I want to spend more time with you too, Masanya!”
I held my hand out to her hopefully, wishing that she’ll hold it. That she’ll grab it, that she’ll prove that I’m still alive- but she simply shook her head. Tears began trickling down my eyes even more.
“I’ll… I’ll die soon, too. So you won’t have to wait for long, I promise.” She whispered, making my chest even heavier than it already is. “I’m sick, Churi. For a long time now. My days are counted and my body’s slowly becoming weaker… So I’ll follow you soon. That’s why, it would be better if rest in peace, now, Akane.”
Hearing this, I slowly dropped my hand down to my side. No wonder she always rests herself by the fence. She couldn’t stand well- she was weak- so she’s using it as her support. And her skin- it’s pale… Not because she’s a ghost, but because she’s sick…
“Churi.” With tears gathering in her eyes as well, she moved closer to me, and pulled me into an embrace; which I surprisingly felt.
Feeling her warmth around me, I wrapped my arms around her too, refusing to let go as I tightened it. I was scared. Scared that I might not see her again if I let go. Scared that I might disappear once our hug ends. I still had a lot of thing to tell her. I wanted to tell her how everyday, the only thing I’m looking forward for was meeting up with her by the rooftop- I wanted to tell her how I’ve already embedded all of our memories in my mind- I wanted to tell her… I wanted to tell her that I didn’t want to leave yet.
But the world’s just cruel.
“Bye, Churi.”
“I don’t want to go.”
“You know…”
“Masanya…”
“I think I’ve fallen for you. I think I love you, Akane.”
“Masana… Masana I love y-”
And with that, Masana was gone. Or rather, I was gone.
-
WE HAVE UPDATED THE PRIZES
Due to the generous donations we have received (we have 100+ pics to choose from now, wow!), the prizes you can win now are bigger! Please check the edited prizes on the first page of this thread or here (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/32407806701/hey-you-there-havent-submitted-an-entry-to-our)
Entry #35
Title: That 1830m
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takahashi Minami
Word Count: 7495
That 1830m
The month after AKB48 in Saitama Super Arena concert DVD was released, a while after the Tokyo Dome concert, Takamina took the same path back to the theater in Akihabara from Tokyo Dome. The 1830m.
It wasn’t a long route; but it was sufficient for Takamina to recap at her own pace, without the cameras, over the things that happened over the past seven years. It had been a long route; but not long enough for Takamina to have achieve everything that she had set out to do on the way along the seven years.
Alighting from the taxi at Tokyo Dome, she took in a deep breath. She had never imagined stepping foot on this sacred concert grounds as a performer back when she saw the advertisement in 2005 July. She thought it might be a good co-curriculum activity for summer; never did Takamina think that she would still be part of this group seven years later. On October 30th that same year, she was one of the 24 chosen ones to be in this group, AKB48; which over the past few years, evolved into a magnanimous team compromising of more than 200 members.
Taking a step away from the Dome, she smiled; the precious 23 other members, many whom are much older than she was and many of them who had went on with life, away from AKB48 seven years down the road while she was still stuck here. Life, it has its own plans for everyone.
Takamina didn’t know how and why but one of her earliest friends was this Itano Tomomi who was miles different from her; fashionable even at 14, Takamina could only dream of being half as so as Tomochin was. The only common point they both have was probably their favorite shopping district was Shibuya; that even, it didn’t really make sense to Takamina how they could shop in the same area, yet come out with vastly different clothes.
-
Tokyo Dome City, the place where they did Request Hour 2012 in; never did Takamina think that she and the rest of the 48family would be stepping foot on the bigger stage beside this, just months later. She grinned as images from yesteryear came alive in front of her; Shihochan, Yukarin, CinDy and Mariko would daydream in between lessons about being able to hold a concert in this hall back when they were nobodies. They would talk about the stages that they wished to put up before Yukarin teases Mariko about her lack of stamina and singing skills.
Speaking of Mariko, Takamina giggled; she could still remember how shy Mariko was when she first joined the group, three months later than everyone. Sitting at one corner, trying to blend into the surroundings as much as she could, but always failing horribly seeing how tall she was, even back then. Takamina always teased the older girl, “If only you were there to witness the breathtaking seven fans theater show!”
It was a day which everyone wouldn’t forget – December 8th 2005 – their first-ever theater show back home in Akihabara. A1st, they called it. The members never really expected an audience, though in their hearts, everyone was hoping for a miracle that never came for them. They ran out onto the stage when overture ended and caught a glimpse of the audience; it didn’t look as bad as they thought, maybe about 50 or 60 people? Then slowly, Takamina’s eyes picked up familiar faces; the record company boss, the lady in charge of their outfits, that guy who works on their schedule…
It stuck her in the world worst possible way: The audience aren’t fans, but people who are working with, working for, them. She would never forget how dejected she felt that night when Aki-P told them that in the audience; there were a mere seven fans and they had to do much more than what they are doing, in order to reach out to everyone.
That night, Takamina said something to the team despite her young age; Even if there are only seven fans, we’ve to do our best. Because these seven people are here to watch us, we cannot give them any lesser than what we would give to a full-house. Let’s support each other and go forth!
Takamina didn’t know that but she missed the approving nod she got from Togasaki, the AKB48 theater manager, who was observing the talk at the corner of the theater.
-
Stopping by the road as the traffic turns red, Takamina remembered the one announcement that stopped her heart back in 2006; the release of Sakura no Hanabiratachi. One of the songs in A1st set-list, she had never imagined how they could have released a single of that. The cover-jacket shooting was hilarious with them trying to arrange each other according to heights and some refusing to admit that they are more vertically-challenged than the rest. Takamina remembered the day when they were told that the theater performance will be used for the PV; Haruna was trying to do a different hairstyle from what she usually does and was panicking when she almost couldn’t tie her hair in time.
They didn’t know how the PV was going to look like until it came out; tears were shed in the theater as it played on the huge screens when all the behind-the-scenes were included. Nozomi and Shihochan chuckled at the scene when the former was teaching her the dance steps, which they later realized were wrong. Takamina grinned at Acchan and Nacchan at the scene where they were hugging and the trio laughed, seeing that they were sat beside one another again.
“A-AKB48…Takahashi Minami?” A voice stopped Takamina in her tracks and asked. Takamina turned and saw a nervous-looking wota and smiled, nodding her head. The guy asked for a handshake which the captain gave with another smile, thanking him for his support. The stammering boy could only stammer back his thanks and mumbled something about him being the thankful one instead of her.
-
Two months after their first theater stage, on February 4th, it was Team A’s first ever sold out theater show. The members couldn’t believe that when it was first told to them.
But soon after the joy, their manager revealed that the second auditions would be opened soon and they were to expect even more competition. Takamina sighed; if it wasn’t already difficult to keep the rivalry down in Team A, what more, another new team. Compared to them, the formation of Team K only took a week to decide and narrowed down to a mere 19 members.
Takamina briefly remembered how they were introduced to each other and the light whispers among the members about which members looked threatening. It didn’t come as a surprise that the few taller members – Akimoto Sayaka, Miyazawa Sae – were narrowed down as ones to look out for. Maimai did point out that the other girl who shared her name – Oshima Yuko – had a threatening glint in her eyes every time she looked at a Team A member, but visibly softened whenever she talked to a Team K member. None of the members, Team A or Team K, ever let their guard down whenever they were with members from the other team.
They didn’t have many interactions from what Takamina remembered. The captain shook her head as she felt her shoelaces coming off; maybe walking the same route twice in a row wasn’t a good idea, the captain chuckled to herself.
Little by little, Team A heard of Team K’s motto and it was something very different from their own; something along the lines of forging closer than friends bonds in order to push each other forth and excel in whatever they are tasked to do, the complete opposite of the ‘rivals’ concept that both teams were fed with since their formation. Of course, Takamina knew that Team A were close friends, helping each other in areas that one wasn’t strong in, but she knew that they had never wanted to be more than ‘colleagues’.
Perhaps it was after seeing how Team K helped out each other that Team A also took another step forth; by putting down the rivalry in their hearts and reaching out to one another genuinely. Seeing how the dancing experts in Team K – Nattsumii, Umechan and the other Oshima girl – helping out the weaker ones like Maachan and Mee-tan, Team A learnt something.
You can only improve if the group improves. And that is the only way to survive in AKB48.
-
A few glances were thrown Takamina’s way as she continued down her route; she guessed she got about 300-ish meters down so far, five-sixth more of her journey towards the theater. Glancing at her watch, she was glad she started early. She would probably make it back to the theater by 3pm, she thought. It would give her plenty of time for rest before rehearsals start for the Team A stage that night.
Team A stages, Takamina reminisced, thinking back about the A2nd stage that they did in April 2006. With Team K taking over their A1st, making it their K1st, Team A got a new set-list and the members were thrilled. Even though the new dance steps were relatively more complicated than before, their dance had indeed improved over the months and the members could catch on much faster. Takamina remembered the few days she had to stay back with some of the members to catch up with the dancing, being a horrible dancer herself. “Hey, I’m pretty awesome a dancer now,” the midget argued with herself internally.
Little by little, the theater began to have fans that came to watch them regularly. Takamina remembered the familiar faces which always followed her when she changed her positions in songs; it became a habit for the fans to follow their oshimen as they danced across the stage. No one could remain in their seats throughout the one-odd hour of performances; Takamina thought it might be a fun thing to experience once again though it seemed rather impossible seeing how strict rules were now at theater shows.
-
The girl stopped in front of a takoyaki shop and contemplated getting a serving of the delicious snack that Yuka relishes, then succumbing to temptation and ordered a takeaway.
Time seemed to fly after that; with the release of Skirt Hirari, and then soon after, Aitakatta, Takamina thought. With an increase in popularity, the group got busier; it no longer mattered if you are Team A or K, but everyone seemed to start seeing themselves as part of AKB48. Soon there was A3rd and likewise, K3rd…
Just as they thought they could remain status quo for a bit longer, it was announced that the third auditions for Team B had started. “How should we face these new girls?” Takamina remembered Maimai asked with the other Oshima clinging onto her. “The same how you treated me,” Yuko replied cheekily to which Maimai replied, “With a sense of loathing?” Takamina could almost picture the dejected look on Yuko’s face then when Maimai joked.
However, jokes aside, the members were lost on should they treat the newly formed Team B of 20 girls with the same wary heart they once had for each other, or to open their hearts and be friends…
A year after Team A’s first ever stage, on 2006’s December 8th, it became a tradition to stick a pink ribbon on the pillar in the theater. Takamina smiled thinking of the ‘ceremony’ they did in December last year where she was the one sticking the ribbon on. “I could still reach next year,” she remembered saying so which earned laughter in the theater.
-
It wasn’t really until when Nacchan, CinDy and Shihochan transferred to Team B did the three teams really got together; Takamina secretly thanked the transfer (though regrettable in her opinion, for she loved the three and was rather close with Nacchan even) for it pulled everyone together.
From what Takamina could remember, 2007 had been tough though fruitful; another new stage, another audition for the fourth generation, and four singles in a year.
When they were first told of Yuuhi no Miteriru Ka single, Takamina was hoping for a track that would finally stray them away from the ‘panties-showing group’ image and also for a song that focuses less on love. What were the odds of that near-impossible wish coming true?
Well, when the lyrics of Yuuhi no Miteriru Ka were revealed to the Senbatsu members, Takamina (and the rest of the girls) were no doubt, pleasantly shocked. Despite it being a 2007 release, Yuuhi remains her favorite song; and she knew that for some of the members like Haruna and Acchan, despite them having better positions in some other songs, still list this as their favorite track. It meant a lot to the members, if not for the change of image, but also for the encouraging lyrics. Whipping out her iPhone, Takamina scrolled through her songs and decided to put the song on loop; what’s better to conclude this walk down the memory than with this song?
The last day of 2007 was spent taking part in the 58thKohaku Uta Gassen, the group’s first ever. Despite not having any really big fanciful performances, just being at the venue thrilled the members, and it certainly gave them the boost to continue on forth towards 2008.
-
Throwing the emptied takoyaki box into the bin, Takamina rested on the fence beside the road, humming along to the energetic yet not irritating melody. Takamina didn’t know how to start on 2008; it seemed like a really busy year, if not memorable one. There was the first ever request hour, the first ever AKB48 variety show, the first ever digital single, the announcement of SKE48, the first ever no3b release, and not forgetting, the first time that Acchan wasn’t their center.
It was a cloudy Tuesday morning when the manager announced their next single, Oogoe Diamond to the excited group of girls. What stuck them was the Senbatsu name-list had someone unfamiliar; Matsui Jurina. It was later told to the members that she is from SKE48, “and she would be the center for this single.” The calls of “lies” and “blasphemy” rang out in the studio as the members tried to deal with this sudden and rather unacceptable announcement.
The next day, a timid-looking young girl was brought to the AKB48 theater to meet the rest of the Senbatsu members. To everyone’s horror (and some lolicons’ joy), the mature-looking girl was only 11; while she introduced herself in a strong and clear voice, it was later pointed out by Mariko that Jurina’s eyes flashed a look of nervousness and uneasiness when she first took the stage to speak. Anyone would have thought that the AKB48 members were already used to, if not immune to the constant change of members and would know how to properly handle such situations but no, in reality, they were still as lost as they were since the start.
Takamina recalled how after the first dance practice, the young girl retreated to a corner of the room, plugging her earphones in and just sat there, watching as the rest of the girls went off for their lunch.
“I’m going to get Jurina,” Mariko announced in the other room, standing up from the table where the rest were seated with their lunch. It surprised everyone; though no one really said it but everyone was thankful towards Mariko for being daring enough to lead the young girl into the circle. Mariko later joked about how Jurina refused her invitation to lunch while Miichan took a jab at the older girl, claiming that she has a lolicon face. Likewise to say, Miichan didn’t escape without a bruise on her arm that day.
Getting to know the really young girl, Takamina couldn’t help but feel in awe of her determination and almost everything about her. Being young, she seemed to carry her feelings on her sleeves; her emotions were on display for anyone who bothered to take a look at her and it worked to her advantage. Soon, everyone was fighting to shower her with care and concern.
The whole Matsui Jurina and Oogoe Diamond taught Takamina something very important, and one that she abides by even now: If you want someone to treat you genuinely, you do the same first.
-
Passing by a manga shop, Takamina couldn’t help but took some time off the route and popped in to check if One Piece had a new book out. Iiwake Maybe greeted Takamina before the shop-owner could and you could only imagine the look of surprise and joy when she saw it was her. Rushing out from the counter, the middle-aged lady greeted Takamina and offered assistance. It wasn’t a rare sight to be honest, but somehow, Takamina felt flattered.
It turned out, the latest issue wasn’t released yet but Takamina felt bad to leave empty-handed. Grabbing the previous release, Takamina proceeded to the counter to pay for it. “It’s free for you!” the lady insisted despite Takamina’s refusal. “Please! There’s only so much I can give to you after all the joy you and your members brought for my family,” the lady said, pushing the paper bag into Takamina’s hands.
Who would have thought that she could achieve this much over a mere 7 years? Iiwake Maybe was the first ever song that born out from their first elections. The cut-throat popularity competition that separated the team into who’s popular and who’s not; the one event that let the members fully grasped the ‘rivalry’ concept that they were once told off but had long forgotten.
It was especially cruel to Acchan and Yuko, Takamina recalled. With Acchan being somewhat appointed as the group’s ace, Yuko had been struggling with both her own increasing popularity and the idea that she could never replace Acchan on the top. It was her chance to show the world that she is better; but life fell short of it and she was placed #2, right behind the ace. She would always play the second fiddle to Acchan, and that made her angry with herself. Yes, she was thankful for the fans who voted for her but she felt that she didn’t do enough to earn more support. She had imagined that if she had given as much chances to shine as Acchan, it would probably be here standing at the top then.
The elections, however cruel it might be seeing that it gave every member a label, did some good. Yukarin and CinDy who were conveniently left out of Senbatsu despite being first generation members were included in the single, scoring the 15th and 17th positions and once again proving their popularity.
Takamina remembered the look of disappointment on Sayaka’s face when she realized that her best friend was cut off the media senbatsu list though she made it in herself. She also recalled the joy she felt in her heart when Miichan, Tomochin, Mariko names were called. Despite being good friends with both Acchan and Yuko, Takamina rooted for Acchan in her heart and it seemed that it exploded in joy when Acchan was placed first. She recalled her thankful feelings, being placed #5 even though in her humble opinions, she wasn’t as appealing as the other members like Haruna and Erepyon.
All these rivalry and competition only highlighted one thing to Takamina then: Friendship amongst members and how it overwrites all these popularity contests in the end.
-
Refusing to leave without giving something back, Takamina took a photo with the shop-lady and gave her a signature. Overlooking the counter, she saw the shelf of CDs behind and it had the whole AKB48 discography. “RIVER caught my attention, and I went back to get all the albums before that. My son continued getting them since Beginner,” the lady shared sheepishly after catching Takamina’s gaze at the shelf.
“I like RIVER too,” Takamina smiled, “The lyrics…it’s really good,” to which the lady nodded. Fumbling with the player, RIVER came on.
The PV had been a chore to film; having to don on those thick army outfits and not forgetting wading through the water with that dirty makeup. The need to keep a straight and serious face for the song was also a chore for some of the smiley members though no one really complained since the encouraging lyrics immediately made the song a kami kyoku amongst the fans and the members.
“Sayaka! Your hair looks like ramen,” Jurina teased, slurping up her lunch. The older girl gave a distressed look, “I don’t need more reminders of that. You didn’t know how much I protested against this hairstyle,” Sayaka cried out, using her usual exaggerated actions to emphasize her point. The room erupted in laughter and Tomo~mi patted the older girl’s head, “It’s okay Saya~ka, it’s cute!” making everyone laughed even harder.
“Thank you for the manga!” Takamina yelled as she stepped out of the shop. The lady shook her head, “Thank you instead!” came the reply. Takamina smiled; it just got even realer that AKB48 could indeed do more than just perform; they touched lives and brought people together.
-
Takamina, are you coming to the theater earlier? – Mariko-sama
Probably reaching at 3-4. Why? – Takamina
Just thought of going through some steps with the team earlier, seeing that it’s our first stage after Atsuko’s graduation. – Mariko-sama
Oh, I’m cool with it. I’ll text everyone then. 4 it shall be! - Takamina
Slipping her phone into her pocket, Takamina quickened her steps. If she wants to make it on time, with time to rest, she needs to walk faster and avoid all these distractions. If 2009 had been hectic, then there isn’t any word that was sufficient enough to describe how much more chaotic 2010 was.
It was also the start of A6th, K6th and B5th; which for the past 2 years hadn’t changed. It was the stages for the new teams that were reshuffled in August 2009. Takamina remembered how tears were shed on stage and backstage where members, whose ties were forged for years, were brutally forced to strain by separating them from everyone they were used to working with. How Tomo~mi fell sick for weeks after the reshuffle, being separated from the members whom she had grown so used to, and even contemplated graduating from the team. Takamina could still remember the hate she felt for the management for forcing something this cruel to the members; though at the same time, she truthfully believed that it might mark something bigger and different for the team as a whole.
In that reshuffle, she was given the rightful title of a captain, the captain of Team A; at the same time, Sayaka, who had been leading Team K was also named Team K’s captain and Yukirin was named Team B’s captain. She laughed silently, how things have changed after two years; Mariko is now the Team A captain, Yuko taking the reins from Sayaka, and Umechan had transferred to Team B to take over the captain position. She? She was being named the general manager of AKB48; something like the second-in-command after Yasusu; though Takamina, to be honest, still couldn’t grasp what all that was about.
However, when 2010 was mentioned, two things came to mind vividly; Heavy Rotation and Jankyen Tournament.
The second election saw Yuko overthrowing Acchan as the #1 in AKB48; Heavy Rotation was the election song and as much as the PV was controversial, it sure helped them secured a bunch of headlines and attention. Clad in bikini-like sleepwear, the PV shown them playing around and kissing each other; it was daring but it made sense when the PV was explained to them. Girls, gathering for a sleepover, were very much like this. Even when they had their sleepovers, minus the fanciful underwear, it was pretty much like that…and Takamina daresay, sometimes even more crazy than what was shown in the PV. The hoo-ha did them good; AKB48 began to gain recognition from local and foreign media and their appearances on TV, magazines and just about everything else increased.
Life got really hectic for the members, especially the Senbatsu members. Takamina remembered how apologetic she felt for having to miss so many theater shows in a row; it was their starting point and she never want to neglect this important detail of her life. However, not only did the workload grew, so did the amount of concerts that they have to stage as a group; and that was something really taxing on the small captain’s body.
The first ever Jyanken Tournament was announced after Surprise wa Arimasen concert and the competition, based solely on personal luck, kicked off in September. Well, Takamina never had jyanken luck. She was glad however, that someone else got a chance to shine. The tournament wasn’t one that was based on the management, nor the fans’ decision, but one based on the members themselves. It was a pure challenge of luck and therefore it opened doors to members who never got the chance. She was thrilled to see Uchida got her chance to be the center of the next single; the change of center had also allowed more people to see how versatile each member was and Takamina was more than glad.
-
Lunch before practice? – Nyan Nyan
Nah, I’ll skip. – Takamina
You’re going to starve before performance. – Nyan Nyan
I just had Takoyaki!! –Takamina
Takamina wished she could sum up 2011 within 400m, but she knew it will be too difficult. Too much happened in the span of just 365 days; NMB48 and HKT48 started their theater shows, the great earthquake in March, the third election, the Seibu Dome concert and winning the Japan Record award at the 53rd Japan Records Awards.
Truthfully, there are some periods of time when Takamina was thankful for AKB48; the earthquake in March and the aftermath made Takamina see the human-side of the management. Some people criticized them; doubting their efforts and belittling them to just mere publicity, but the members knew that it wasn’t what the management was aiming for. With the ‘What can I do for someone?’ project, AKB48 reached out to more people than they ever thought possible. Donations were a given; donating their record and merchandises proceeds to the cause and reaching out to their fans to donate through the project, they made a different for the victims under the name of AKB48.
A person’s strength might be weak, but a combined effort made it big, Takamina learnt.
She was thankful of the chance to go out to the affected areas and simply put up a performance for the victims. It wasn’t anything fanciful; they did not have bright lights, colourful outfits nor were they paid for that. It was just to make people smile; to touch hearts through songs and dances, to ease the mental pain of the victims and even though there was only that much the members could do, they were glad that at least they did that.
They gave hope, in places where hope was scarce.
The outreach programs surprisingly, helped to tighten the bonds amongst members. The two Tomomis who had strayed apart due to conflicting schedules and busy lives were brought together for one of that program and not only did they bring smiles on the children’s faces, they brought smiles on their own after being able to get a chance to collaborate once again. Through the program, and through talking with each other on the trip there, they got to know each other again; it only served to further strengthen those tight bonds these two shared and reassuring each other that no matter what happened, they will always have each others’ backs.
And that, happened for many other members as well.
-
The third election saw Yuko handing the top back to Acchan; it had been a power fight between the duo on the surface, but other than the voting times, Takamina knew that none of them actually put the ‘rivalry’ in practice. They might see each other as competition but it was all fair and positive; Acchan and Yuko served to push each other to their limits, exceeding what they think they could achieve and shine in their own ways, then sharing this limelight with AKB48.
Losing the title, Yuko had been regretful; the tears she shed at backstage, hugging Mariko and just crying it out wasn’t a sore-loser act but one that showed how important the team was to her, and how much she hoped that her hard-work over the past year had repaid her. More than anyone else, Yuko did her best in her solo works as well as her commitments to the group in the past year; with the explosive popularity of Heavy Rotation came the immerse attention on her as the center. As the body protested with the added workload, she pushed herself to the limit, wanting to prove to everyone that choosing her as the ace wasn’t a wrong choice.
What she was lacking, she made it up with hard work and more hard work. But it didn’t work for her…
Acchan on the other hand, didn’t have to face with the pressure from Heavy Rotation and even so, the center position was handed back to her immediately in the next single after the election. Takamina couldn’t even put into words how she felt when her partner-in-crime got her #1 back; it wasn’t that Yuko didn’t deserve it, but Takamina knew more about what Acchan went through over the past year and wished everyone could feel it as well. The haters who showered her with malice after she regained her ace position in the next release despite being #2, the self-doubt that she had ever since being #2, the strain on her body from her solo and AKB48 commitments and ultimately the stress on her to regain her #1 in this elections…
The day when Acchan received the message from Yasusu, asking her if she was able to stand in center for Beginner, Takamina and Mariko were with her. The way the girl broke down under pressure was something that Takamina wouldn’t forget; in return, Mariko replied the text. She is able to stand as the center, but not willingly. Because this is what’s good for AKB48, she will. But her little body is currently dying from all these, and if you could, please let us share her burden. It resulted in the multi-center versions for Beginner; and never had Acchan been more grateful for having her friends with her.
-
A little girl stopped Takamina as she turned into Akihabara and politely requested for a handshake. “I’ve watched you at Seibu Dome,” she gushed, clinging onto her mother. “We’ve been there for the first and last day. She enjoyed it so much,” her mother added, patting the little girl’s head. Takamina smiled and thanked them for the support and bent down to give the girl a hug, “We’ll put on a better show for you next time when you watch us,” she promised.
Seibu Dome…especially the first day, Takamina fought back the urge to apologize to the girl when she mentioned she was there for it. It was such a disappointing concert, not just for her and the members, but also for the fans. Even if fans who later went to handshake sessions reassured Takamina that they hardly sensed anything less than perfect during the performances, Takamina couldn’t forgive herself for the uninspiring show.
They didn’t have much time to rehearse for that concert; it was a new venue with a lot of newer elements, new songs thrown into it but nothing could be an excuse for their lackluster concert. She recalled that while she was doing the debrief with the members, she shed tears; those weren’t tears of sadness but tears that encompassed her regretful feelings. She wasn’t blaming the members because if anything, she was blaming herself for not noticing how badly everyone was coping during the earlier rehearsals and allowed such an uninspiring show be put up.
Every mistake is a chance to improve and learn; Takamina was glad that the members had the same mindset, and the next two days were a blast.
-
Starting out as the ‘panties-showing group’, Takamina dreamt of, but never thought it was possible, to get the Japan Records Award. But one can dream, and working towards that dream, it became a reality on December 30th in 2011. This time, the members shed tears of joy. It was a recognition for them; that they are more than just idols but singers and also entertainers that impacted the Japanese music scene.
It was a milestone for AKB48, and Takamina was thankful she was part of it.
-
Stopping near the AKB48 café in Akihabara, Takamina observed the long queues outside the café and a grateful feeling soared within her. She didn’t know how it was possible to receive all these love that these fans have for them but if anything, she wants to do more in return for their adoration. Concluding the Tokyo Dome concert, Takamina and the management had been discussing and exploring their possibilities for the future seeing that 2012 was a year of huge changes for them.
Give Me Five allowed the members to try their hands on various instruments, making them work towards a more musically-inclined group than before. It was tough when they were learning; having to bring around guitars and bass and to practice them in their free time wasn’t easy especially when the little time that they had for themselves was usually spent on sleeping. Being the drummer, Yukirin had it worst; it wasn’t really practical to bring around a drum-set and drumming wasn’t exactly something that you can master in a short time. Her tight schedule saw her going to the studio at two in the morning to practice on her own for a few hours, then waking up at seven to prepare for her schedule for the new day. The results was amazing though; being able to pull this single off let the members felt that they could do almost anything that would be thrown to them in the future.
-
The two major concerts that they did in 2012; one in Saitama Super Arena and the other, on the stage of their dreams, the Tokyo Dome had been mind-blowing for them.
Back then, Saitama Super Arena was the biggest stage that they had done to date and the sheer size of it was breath-taking; Takamina recalled how involved the members were, giving their opinions on stage setup, shuffle units, performances. It was the first step that the members took to make the stage something they can call their own and Takamina believed that because it was something that they could proudly call their own, it was what made the concert the most enjoyable one that they ever did. The smiles on stage throughout the three days weren’t forced; it might be tiring for them, having to make their presence felt on this vast stage, but because they were enjoying it themselves, it seemingly didn’t felt as taxing.
It was also memorable because on that big stage, Acchan announced her graduation.
Honestly, it had been something that they had discussed many times over the past few months. It wasn’t only to her; Yuko, Mariko, Tomochin, Miichan, Haruna and a few others had either discussed with Acchan before or had caught wind of her considering this move. It was a big thing not just for her but also for AKB48; what can the team do after their ace graduate and how can they cope? It wasn’t a rushed decision but even so, equally shocking.
Takamina felt it when Acchan asked for a firm handshake before the start of the first day; the look in her eyes told Takamina that this girl was going to go for it and she was confident enough that she can brave through whatever shit that awaits her after she leaves this sanctuary. When she said “I’m going to do it,” on the third day, Takamina knew that Acchan had never been more firm and brave as she was throughout the seven years as she had been today.
While the graduation took the country and the world by storm and shock, the announcement of Jurina and Miruki joining Team K and B respectively was somewhat neglected.
Jurina, despite being in AKB48 singles since years ago, is a part of SKE48. Pampered like a baby that she is and in spite of the strong SKE48 ace front that she carried, she collapsed. Nishishi, Masana and Churi watched helplessly with heavy hearts when Jurina went down; there was only so much that they could do to help her and this…this was way beyond them. What they could do was to give her mental support though “what help could that give to her anyway,” as Masana had bitterly said to the other two.
On the other hand, Sayanee didn’t know how to respond when Miruki was announced to be going to Team B; she laughed, thinking it was a joke from Togasaki, and when it hit her that it wasn’t, she broke down at the backstage. She thought that she was losing her rival, the one who pushed her to excel in everything that she does, her friend, the one who knows what’s going on in her life more than anyone else, and most of all, her sister, the one whom she knew she could trust her life on.
They were thankful though, both SKE48 and NMB48, that it wasn’t a full transfer; it was the light in the midst of everything chaotic.
-
Walking past the many shops in Akihabara, Takamina was suddenly reminded of a fellow first generation member – Nakanishi Rina.
It still pained and angered her to think how someone as flawless (in Takamina’s fangirl-ish opinion) as Rinatin would even consider a career like that. But who was Takamina to judge what path a frie-, she meant ex-friend, to take? Especially after Rinatin made a conscious effort to cut off all forms of communications with the other members – Takamina believed it was to protect them and their image – and sending that one last message to her before she stopped the phone-line she had been using since they knew each other. I’m sorry Minami, for being such a horrible friend; I’ll go my own way in life, and we’ll never cross paths ever again but I wish you and AKB48 would be even more successful. The 3 years in AKB48, were my happiest times. I’m sorry. Takamina didn’t know what she was sorry about then, but now she does.
Original Team A members held the same wish – to step onto the Tokyo Dome as a performer, and do a sold-out concert for their fans.
On August 24th 2012, though it wasn’t the original Team A, K, B members, but in fact everyone in the 48family and missing a handful of the graduated members, AKB48 stepped onto the top of Tokyo Dome and fulfilled their 1830m dream. It was such a beautiful sight from the stage at Tokyo Dome, it was even more beautiful, standing on top of the cake-like structure stage, and looking at their fans, Takamina remembered. It was a sight that she would never forget.
Day 1 ended with a reshuffle; yet another cruel reshuffle. Takamina believed that if they could get through with the one in 2009 and emerged stronger and better, they could handle this as well. And being appointed as the general manager, she would do her best, do even better than what she was doing now, to lead the team on.
The second day however, was her day.
She didn’t know what to anticipate for the second day; for a far bit, she was dreading it, knowing that the next day would be her best friend’s graduation. But the day took a turn for the better when the duo did their duet, and packaged as a graduation gift, Acchan announced her solo project. It was her dream; she wanted to be more than just a solo singer, but a solo singer while she is still in AKB48. It didn’t go down well for her when Tomochin, Acchan, Wasamin, Mayuyu, Sasshi and Yukirin were given their solo singing projects; Takamina knew that she wasn’t the best singer in AKB48, heck no one could be the best singer in AKB48 other than Yuka, but she had always hoped that somehow, a miracle would befall her and she could be given a solo project. She loved singing more than anything else and whenever she had the time to, she would practice her singing and tried her best to be better with each performance. Even though she knew it would just be a matter of time for her to have her solo, there were times when she turned on herself and doubted her capabilities. It wasn’t until the announcement that she came to realize that all the whispers that the higher-ups had when she stepped in the room, the unfamiliar staff faces that were at their rehearsals, and just about everything that she felt out of place, fell into place.
And then, it was Acchan’s graduation.
Takamina didn’t have much time to cheer over her solo project for the next day at Tokyo Dome and the day after at the theater were for Acchan’s graduation. What she felt about the strong girl was said during both performances and she knew that even after graduation, her bonds with the members would not change. So much had happened in the seven years that they were together as AKB48, and they have faith in their friendship. If a graduation could break the friendship, then it wouldn’t be a friendship to be proud of in the start, right?
Miichan knew this as well; she mumbled it to Takamina while she was crying into the latter’s shoulders, but despite knowing so, Miichan couldn’t control her tears. Miichan knew that with their busy schedules – Miichan with AKB48 and Acchan with her filming – it would be difficult for them to meet up even for a meal. Back when Acchan was struggling with her solo commitments, at least in the midst of all these busy periods, they could meet for a few hours while they work as part of AKB48 together. But these little times…they couldn’t happen anymore after the graduation.
However, it wasn’t until August 28th that it sunk in for most of the members that Acchan had indeed, left AKB48.
She would no longer be labeled as AKB48’s Maeda Atsuko, but just plainly, Maeda Atsuko.
-
Stopping in front of Don Quijote, Takamina took a deep breath; 1830m later, she found her own answer.
Checking her watch, 3:32, she was glad she made it in time for the rehearsal with some time to rest. Taking the lift up to the theater floor, she stepped out, greeted by two Kojimas, Natsuki and Nyan Nyan. The latter laughed at Takamina’s seemingly disheveled look before fixing the ribbon on the top of her head and pushing her into the theater, “I’ve got extra food,” she exclaimed happily just as Takamina’s stomach let out a hungry growl.
Life, especially life as AKB48, moves on, Takamina came to realize.
In this group, it was taught that no one is irreplaceable and everyone is vulnerable; if the ace leaves, someone will step up under pressure to be the next ace, and the cycle continues. It doesn’t stop for anyone. It might be cruel for some, but that was how AKB48 survived and is still thriving despite it going into its seventh year.
At first, it wasn’t easy for Takamina to accept that someone could be this easily replaced or forgotten. Then she learned.
No one was replaced or forgotten.
They were simply kept as precious memories and used to fuel the next generation on forth with their own unique charms, pushing them forth to reach the next milestone and to create brighter and better records in the name of AKB48.
-
Sorry for the lack of updates in the forum yesterday! :panic: Double update now! And wait for more fics today later! :thumbup
Entry #36
Title: Not Letting Go...
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Shinoda Mariko, Takahashi Minami; MariTaka
Word Count: 2893
Not Letting Go...
It’s been 2 years now, since I’ve graduated from AKB48. I’m now solely focusing on being a model. Ah! I forgot to introduce myself, I’m Shinoda Mariko. Age… it’s a secret~
Although I’ve graduated from AKB, I still keep in contact with some members I’m close with like Maeda Atsuko, Acchan, Kojima Haruna, Nyaro, Minegishi Minami, Miichan, Oshima Yuko, and Itano Tomomi, Tomochin. We often will go and eat and drink or even sleepover at each other’s apartment. I would also go to shopping with Nyaro and Tomochin.
But… Even if we tried to act like normal, we all know that things between us is never going to be the same as when we were all still in AKB together. Especially not when ‘that’ happened 2 years ago…
You guys might have noticed a name missing, a close friend that we have in common. Maybe even more than being a close friend, someone we all love so much for so many years. Someone who is always so gentle and caring to all of us… Someone who would always lead us towards our dream and someone we all respect so much… Yes, she was once AKB’s captain and at the same time, also Team A’s captain. Her name is Takahashi Minami a.k.a. Takamina but I would often call her Minami.
When I’m with her, I would always feel safe and comfortable. I always thought that this will last forever but… that incident causes us to lose her forever…
Minami I miss you…
That Chibi captain will always look after someone else’s interest before her own. She always pushes herself over her own limit and that always made me feel bad. Even though her height is only 148cm, her back seems a lot bigger when she’s standing in front of us. I also tried to push myself to become stronger so that I can also stand by her side but no matter how hard I try, she is always one step in front of me.
She really is a good captain, strict when rehearsal but gentle and caring during times when we’re weak and need someone to comfort us. She always notices when there’s something going on, like when a member is feeling down or sick. She really is irreplaceable in AKB. I can’t and don’t to even think about what will happen to AKB if she’s not in it.
Though we respect her as a captain, we will always make fun of her as we know that someone as kind and tender as her won’t really be mad at us. Besides, it’s really cute to see her being bullied by us~ Oh! When I say bully, it’s not like those you see in the dramas, it’s only playing around in our case.
That charisma that Minami has, has brought a lot of us together like Acchan, Nyaro, Miichan, Yuko, Tomochin and me. All of us loves and care about Minami and we’re all satisfied with the distance we have with her. We’re all afraid to take our relationship we have now a step further, fearing that it will break the only thing we have now. I’m also one of those people who love Minami as in lover and also a coward. I really regret why I’m such a coward back then and hid my feelings about Minami… Now, I don’t even have the chance to tell her my feeling.
I don’t know why I’m spilling off all these feelings now when I’ve kept it inside me for 2 years already. Maybe, it’s because I’ve never let go about that incident. Although it hurts to remember it again, I want to share this with you guys.
I still remember how sympathetic I was or rather we were when Minami left us, forever. Things seems to have turned black and white, everything just seems so lifeless and boring. Nothing seems to interest me anymore. I only know that, AKB has lots of memories about Minami and it hurts whenever I recall about it. So, I decided to graduate from AKB. Trying to run away from reality, from the fact that Minami is no longer here anymore… After I graduated, they, those we also love Minami also can’t bear to stay at AKB any longer too and also chose to graduate.
Minami, do you know how much I loved you?
How much I regret about not confessing to you?
That incident happened 2 years ago when we’re having our 4th Tokyo Dome concert…
2 Years Ago…
AKB are having their 4th Tokyo Dome concert. All the members are now at the stage having rehearsal.
“So the starting song would be Ponytail to Shushu, then…” Minami is explaining the song orders to the members.
After the explanations, without much time being wasted members starts to go to their own position and prepare.
An hour later, Minami gave everyone a rest and I went to Miichan and Nyaro’s side and start to have a chat with them.
“What’s the trend color this summer?” Miichan asks me.
“So this summer’s popular colors are light blue and sky blue” I answered.
“And light green too” Haruna added.
“I see, I see” Miichan mumbles as she is taking notes seriously which made me and Haruna laugh out loud.
“What are you guys laughing about??” Minami asks as she just finishes talking with the staffs.
“Nah, it’s just that it’s funny when you see how serious Miichan is taking notes about fashion” I replied.
“Here’s some water for replenishment, it’s quite hot today better made sure you guys won’t dehydrate and have a heat stroke.” Minami says as she handed each of us a bottle of water.
“Thanks Minami~ You’ll be a good boyfriend” I says teasingly which causes Minami to pout cutely.
“Yea, Takamina! Do you know you’re No. 1 that members want as a boyfriend??” Miichan added.
“I’m a girl!!!” Minami says frustratingly which causes another round of laughter.
“Eh? Isn’t Takamina a guy??” Haruna declare while bending her head a bit to the right.
“Nyan Nyan!!!” Minami cries.
“Hahahaha” We all laughed happily that time, not knowing that we would lose this Chibi captain forever.
As time pass by, it is now the time for the concert to start. We all dance and sing with our full might from the start since we didn’t want to disappoint any of our fans and we didn’t want to do things that will make us regret later on.
It is summer now and the heat today is really strong. With all the dancing and the heat in the backstage, many members were experiencing heat stroke. The heat made us felt like we’re at hell!
In the middle of changing at the backstage, I could see Minami’s face really red and so much sweat. She’s not standing properly and was about to fall. I quickly went to her side and help her stand, she’s at her limit I could tell.
I told her to sit down and take a deep breath and ask if she wants to rest for awhile. She told me she’s fine and can still go on and went to change. When she leaves, I don’t know why but I feel really worried. Sigh* That girl pushes herself way too much, so much that it hurts to see her like that…
Now, the concert is at its peak. At the later half, it is Team unit songs. Now, it’s Bird and it’s me, Minami and Sae chan.
At this time, I just hope the concert finish faster so that Minami can have a rest. Because I know that unless the concert is finishes, Minami would not leave her own part. I don’t know why but as we’re performing ‘Bird’ my right eyelid keep twitching, although I don’t believe much in those superstitions, I just have a bad feeling.
In the middle of the song, I heard something from above so I looked up and saw one of the stage light falling and will hit me soon. I was just so dumbfounded that I forgot to escape and I thought that I’ll die today and regret that why didn’t I confessed to Minami. If I’m lucky and didn’t die today, then I swear to myself that I’ll tell Minami my true feelings.
I closed both of my eyes, waiting for the impact to hit me.
Later, I felt something bump me but it’s from the side and I also heard “Mariko sama, be careful!!!” and CRASH!!!
As I opened my eye, there wasn’t even a scratch on me. But the scene in front of me brought me nightmares…
It was Minami lying on the floor with her head bleeding badly and the stage light beside and its edge is colored by Minami’s blood.
I can’t comprehend what just happened, it was just in the blink of an eye. I felt dizzy and my world spinning, I only remember seeing staffs running towards Minami and myself mumbling ‘No, this can’t be true’ and fainted.
Minami, if I can turn back the time I would rather be the one hit by the stage light and not you…
By the time I woke up, I was at a room full of white except my clothing which I can tell is hospital patient’s clothing so I know that I was at the hospital.
I try to recollect about what happened.
I remember we’re having Tokyo Dome concert and I was performing ‘Bird’ then… Minami!!! I remembered now, Minami was hit by the stage light! Where’s she?!
I hurriedly got up from the bed and was about to dash towards the door when the door suddenly opens, showing Nyaro and Miichan with both of their eyes puffy and red.
“Mariko…” Haruna calls and her voice is a bit husky from so much crying.
“Nyaro, where’s Minami??”I ask worriedly hoping her to tell me everything’s fine, Minami’s fine just a bit injured…
But Miichan’s next few words completely broke my last hope away.
“Mariko, Takamina sob* sob* left us… forever” Miichan then fall onto her knees and starts to cry.
“No… this isn’t true… This can’t be happening! You’re lying!!” I screamed and run and shake Miichan’s shoulder while shouting, “You’re lying! Where’s Minami?! Where’s Minami!!!”
“Mariko, calm down!” Haruna says while trying to pull me away from the crying Miichan.
But I just can’t calm down and continue to shout whatever comes to my mind.
Then suddenly Haruna slapped me and say “Takamina is dead!”
I can’t bear to hear the word ‘dead’ and fainted again.
==============================
2 years have already passed since Takamina passed away… Although I can now face the truth that she is no longer here anymore, I still can’t get rid of this sadness in me. I still wish that I was the one that died and not her…
I always keep myself really busy so that I won’t have the time to think about her. But every time when there’s an event like Chirstmas, New Year, Halloween or April 8, her birthday, I can’t stop but think how we would’ve celebrated those events if she was still here.
Right now is the second Christmas after she has passed away… Tomochin, Acchan, Haruna, Miichan, Yuko, etc. all is going to celebrate it with their family.
I don’t really have the mood to celebrate Christmas but neither do I want to just stay home doing nothing, so I decide to walk around the neighborhood.
As I walk around I see families, friends and lovers all around laughing and celebrating Christmas. In this happy atmosphere, I seemed to not fit in the environment at all.
I just walk aimlessly and by the time I notice there seems to be a bright light covering all my body. I panic a bit but can’t open my eyes to see what’s happening as the light is too much for my eyes.
After a few seconds, I slowly open my eyes but what’s in front of me were not the white snowy scenery I last saw but my old house where I used to live 2 years ago!
I’m really surprised as I look around and I am really sure that it is my house that I used to live in. I’ve moved out since Minami passed away because I want to change of mood and never been back here after I left, but why am I here now?
As I’m thinking, suddenly I heard a sound coming from the bed. It is the AKB48’s Bird and it also used to be my ringing tone 2 years ago. And of course the reason why I changed it is because it always reminded me of Minami…
Anyway, I quickly find the phone which is lying under the blanket but I froze up when I saw the caller’s name…
It is Minami…
How come?! What’s going on?? This can’t be Miichan calling because I remember I input her name as Miichan and not Minami!
Putting aside the matter I decide to pick up the phone.
“Moshi, moshi?” I try to say it calmly but my trembling voice tells that the speaker is not calm at all.
“Ah! Mariko sama? This is Takamina. I was just worried since you’re not at the Tokyo Dome Concert Hall yet because you just told me that you’ll be here at around 7:00 a.m. and now it’s already 7:50 a.m. so I was thinking what could’ve happened.”
“Mi.. Minami??” I stuttered as it indeed is the voice that I missed so much for all these years… That voice that hunted me, that voice that I can’t forget about…
“Yes??”
“Are you really Minami??”
“Of course! Mariko sama, are you okay? Why are you asking funny questions?? Or are you trying to fool around with me again??”
“Minami, what day and year is it today??” I asked nervously to make sure if my prediction was true.
“Huh?? Mariko sama, are you really fine? Of course it’s XX XX 20XX, where we’re having our 4th Tokyo Dome Concert!”
After hearing the date, I can confirm that I have gone back to the past.
To the past where Minami still exists,
To the time where I can still feel her warmth.
To when I still haven’t lose her…
I believe that this is a chance God has given me and this time I’m going to protect Minami! I won’t let go of her anymore, I’ll be brave and tell her my feelings and definitely will avoid that hateful accident that happened 2 years ago, today!
“Hello, Minami? I’ll be there in 40 minutes”
“Okay, then I’ll see you later Mariko sama. Tutt* Tutt* Tutt*”
Once I hang up the phone, I quickly dress up myself and dash towards the concert hall, full of determination!
========================================
The time went past quickly, rehearsals are finished and it’s time for the real thing. Each minute passing reminds me that the time of the ‘accident’ is coming soon and I can’t help but feel cold sweat forming on my back.
Now, it’s time for Bird. Only God knows how nervous and worried I am now because I know what could’ve happened later…
Arg!!! Although I’ve already made a plan, I’m still worried and my eyelids are also jumping which is not a good omen! I just hope nothing unexpected will happen…
As I perform Bird on the stage with Minami and Sae, I am putting 120% concentration on the surrounding and checking if the stage light is going to fall soon.
Then later as expected the stage light is falling and that Bakamina is running towards me and plans to push me away!
I won’t let that Bakamina do things as she like this time! She is selfish enough to save my life and left me 2 years ago but this time I won’t let her do as she pleased!
I hurriedly run towards Minami and push her to the side and of course I also dodge to the side because in my perfect plan is I live happily ever after with Minami and not Minami living but I’m dead!
So after pushing Minami to the safe side and myself out of the area where the stage light is falling on I breathed a sigh of relief. But this does not last long…
As I turn and look at Minami I saw another stage light falling which is just on top of her! This is really something UNEXPECTED!!!
DAMN IT!! What does this have to happen?! Why can’t the world leave us in peace?? What did we do to deserve this?!
I am really going insane as I quickly run towards Minami because I can’t bear to lose her the second time…
“Minamiii!!!!!!!”
Why did God have to take you away from me?
Leaving me in the world full of sadness and despair.
Then after two years,
I believe that a chance has come.
I thought it was a Christmas present from God,
But turns out to be from a devil…
He gave me a hope but just have to crash it the next second!
However I’ll not letting go this time,
I’ll hold onto you tightly in my arms.
If the destiny turns out to be the same,
Then I’ll go with you this time.
-
Entry #37
Title: A Guide To Marine Life
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Matsui Rena, Kojima Haruna; Rena/KojiHaru
Word Count: 2637
A/N: The referenced lyrics are from KojiHaru’s Cloudy Sky. The aquarium they are at is the Okinawa Churaumi (“graceful ocean”) Aquarium; more precisely at the main tank, called the Kuroshio Sea (look it up on youtube).For purposes of this story, let’s pretend that somehow it is possible for the said aquarium to not be overly crowded on a Saturday, that people are allowed to touch the tank glass and, more importantly, that even national idols can peacefully mind their time in there without being disturbed.
A Guide To Marine Life
When the sun split into half brought morning with it, my senses slowly awoke to the noise of an unwelcomed October rain, pattering softly outside my window, as my mind became cluttered with thoughts. And questions. Questions I don’t have a good answer to. Seeing that who I am today is permanently a little different from whom I was yesterday.
« Where can I find a heart that doesn’t have a single wound? »
« In five… ten years time, what will I be in ten years…? »
« Just what do people truly desire? »
Sometimes, I allow myself to think that maybe I grew tired of it. It’s not that I feel like giving up, or anything. I’ve never even considered it. I always took pride in my determination of steel. “I will paint tomorrowonce more with these hands “, to be a person who continues to live with this in the heart, it’s what I’ve taught myself to do.
But… I wonder . Would it be okay for me to break free, just for one day? To get away from it all — the chaotic schedule, the routines; it gets almost suffocating.
Then my mind would wander back to all the people who cheer me on unconditionally, and I feel terribly sorry for my negative thinking. I want to be able to give them healthy smiles, to send them my feelings of appreciation, in return for their everlasting kindness and support. I always remember this, my purpose.
Even so.. it can’t be helped. Once in a while, somehow, I end up feeling low-spirited. Today, even the sky is moody. That’s why, I think that, just for today, it’s okay.
…
A few hours earlier, when I’ve decided I wanted to come here, at the Okinawa Aquarium, and found myself waiting for a train I haven’t taken in years, it just hasn’t occurred to me that it would be a particularly memorable day. I guess that sometimes you meet the person you least expect in the most unthinkable circumstances. And sometimes there’s that one extraordinary encounter everyone’s waiting for, deep in their pockets. For me, that person turned out to be none other than… KojiHaru-san. Come to think of it, it’s quite amusing, isn’t it? How the odds work at times.
At first, even though I was standing right beside her, here, at the Kuroshio Sea, she seemed too far away for my voice to reach. I wondered how should I call out to her? If I were perhaps someone dear to Kojima-san, what would I say to her? But soon enough, before we even had time to take notice, we started talking freely, the way two childhood friends would. It was like I was able to step a little further into her world, and I would let her into mine.
Suddenly, her voice anchored me to reality.
“You can’t defeat Jack Kojiro! “ – she striked a ridiculously cute pose, which seemed more the impersonation of a cat than anything – “… was it?”
My wandering thoughts have been spinning me round for a while now, I think.
“Um.”, I nodded, as a chuckle escaped my lips, “It was cute!”
“Eeh~? Cute? I thought my make up was more of a shocking point.”
“It was, it was. But Kojima-san pulled off a very laughable impersonation of that character.”
“You know, maybe I should have dressed like that for the Janken Tournament, so I couldn’t have been defeated!”
“I think when it comes to that, it’s all about luck, though.”
“It all comes down to that in the end, doesn’t it?”
“ Um.” I nodded in agreement. “Besides, if it’s Kojima-san, then the costume doesn’t matter. It’s always your idol aura that shines through the most.”
“Brighter than all the glitter on our concert costumes?~”, she giggled.
“Yes. If it comes to « Who I want to see »… I want to see Kojima-san—”, in the excitement of the moment, all these words which were on the tip of my tongue, unintentionally slipped. “On stage, I mean! Pe-performing!”, I blushed a little and immediately started touching my bangs nervously, trying to avert her gaze. It’s a bit embarrassing and I realized it a little too late.
“Is that so?” she asked, somehow surprised and somehow contented.
“Yes”, this time my answer was firm. No matter where I look at, there’s Kojima-san being cute.
It must have been my imagination because it seemed as though even her cheeks were slightly colored in a dim shade of red.
“I should treat Rena to some melon pans to properly show you my appreciation. Or maybe I should bake some; would that be better?”
That… I think that would be the end of me. Literally. One overdose of salt disguised in the form of a melon pan, it can’t actually be… deathly, right?
“But isn’t Kojima-san rather sloppy when it comes to cooking…?”, I laughed nervously, “But… but somehow, it fits your image, I think…”
“Eeh~~? It does?”
“Yes. Like a 2D character who is known to be the airhead type,” I explained, “you would actually expect that character to be unskilled in the kitchen… ”
“Oh, I see. ” She slowly nodded. Then her attention was snatched away by something in the aquarium tank.
“Ah! That fish looks exactly like Takamina, doesn’t it!”, her sudden remark aroused my own curiousity as well.
“Which one?”, I asked and she immediately guided my sight with her finger. “See? The really small one right there, you can barely see it—” by the time she could properly finish the sentence, she had already bursted out in a hearty, very contagious, laugh.
“The resemblance is fearsome!”, she eventually managed to add.
“Kojima-san, that’s a bit—”, I tried to rationalize while trying to contain my own chuckles.
“Whoa, amazing~! As expected of Takamina-fish, leading all that bunch out of that hole!! Maybe they are swimming away from the wota!”
Her sense of humour was definitely a bit odd but so delightfully silly that I couldn’t possibly hold it in any longer. I gave in and let the sound of my laughter to join hers. They fell in sync so naturally, like the perfect harmony of a carefully composed symphony. And just like two carefree middleschoolers joking around all the way home, on the last day of school before summer vacantion, we mended into each other’s presence and laughed to our heart’s content for what seemed like a few eternal minutes.
“Say, doesn’t it feel like the fishes can take all the troubling thoughts away?”, she said, after the lively atmosphere settled down. “Everything about them seems so simple. And it’s beautiful, isn’t it? “, she took a calming breath, ”I wonder what it’s like to be a fish…”
“But wouldn’t that be a little ironic?”, I asked, still a little amused.
“Eeh~? How so?”, she seemed genuinely confused.
“Datte~ aren’t fish supposed to be a cat’s favorite meal?” I explained.
She put her finger on her chin as though she was considering the question. “… That’s how it is, isn’t it?”, she smiled a little.
“I would probably end up eaten by a really cute ~nyan nyan”, she said, playfully pouting. Then she laughed.
There it was again. Her laugh. The very moment when Kojima-san shines the brightest. I could feel her behind my eyes. I was truly drawn to her side.
What I experienced in that moment was the bliss to have been the one to make her laugh, and an irresistible urge to have the opportunity to do so everyday.
“But I mean,” her expression became heavy, contemplative, “do they also get to feel lonely, even when there are always so many of the other ones around…?”
She said, almost to herself. We both fell into a moment of comfortable silence, as an aura of quiet empathy embraced the atmosphere.Somehow, her words were a mirror to my own thoughts. My own doubts and anxieties.
誰もが胸の奥に
Everyone, deep in their hearts,
見せたくないものがある
Has something that they don’t want to be seen
モヤモヤしてる気持ちが
Somewhere, there must be feelings of
どこかに浮かんでるはず
Sadness and gloom
I see now. Even Kojima-san feels like this sometimes. I guess that I forget too easily and too often that other people may feel the same way as I do.
“How about we both choose a fish?”, she pointed to a large group of orange fishes with black stripes, trying to follow their perpetual motion with her finger. They were rather small. And definitely impossible to distinguish.
“But… isn’t it impossible to tell the difference?”, I asked, a little confused. I couldn’t tell if she was truly under the impression that she would somehow be able to do so, or if she was trying to lighten the mood.
“See? That one is mine,” her finger pointed towards a comet-tailed goldfish. One second of absence of mind and the fish was nowhere to be seen. A short silence followed.
“Ah, I saw it!”, she shouted.
“Kojima-san, I am pretty sure that is not the same fish”, I smiled. Somehow, Kojima-san is a bit of a child at heart despite the elegance that radiates from her appereance, isn’t she?
“What do you mean it’s not the same fish?”, she looked at me as though I have unraveled the universe’s biggest mystery. A slight frown was starting to cloud her smiling eyes, and suddenly I felt as though I had just accidentally told a little kid that Santa Claus is not coming to town.
“Well, you see—”, I really was at a loss of words. As though to answer to my unvoiced bewilderment, Kojima-san chuckled.
“Just kidding,” she smiled and gently pated my head, ”so Rena is that kind of person, right?” That kind of person…?
“Someone who cherishes the other person’s feelings”, she gave me the answer even though I haven’t asked. She must’ve noticed my troubled expression.
“No, it’s not like that, really. I am rather a very selfish person…”
“Everyone is, truthfully. But, you know… it’s like, people are willing to forget their selfish nature once in a while, aren’t they? And some people do it more often than others. Like a habit, maybe. Rena is a naturally caring person, that’s what I think.” My cheeks burned with a deep shade of red as she continued. “That’s why, someone as gentle as Rena doesn’t have to feel alone.” I felt gratitude surging in my chest, warm and a little like an ache.
As expected, to be told these type of things by Kojima-san is… truly overwhelming.
I realized that maybe this was something we both wanted to hear. Like a needed reassurement of some sort. That we are definitely not alone.
“Th-thank you!!”, I suddenly bowed my head and glued my eyes to the floor. I was struck with the urge to cry. My eyes hesitated and my tears appeared. The more I tried to hold in my tears, the harder they seeked to escape. And before I had realized it, they were streaming down my face. I was just… really, truly happy.
Amidst the silence filling the atmosphere, embarrassment echoed through my trembling self. Then I felt a certain warmth upon my head. Her hand. She tenderly stroked my head. And all I heard was a soft spoken name. My name. “Rena…”
As I finally lifted my head to meet her eyes, the warmth of her hand moved to my forehead. It’s a little embarrassing, but I didn’t mind it at all.
Her skin was soft, her touch was light; it was flaming my every cell. My heart’s pounding a mile a minute. So much that I decide it couldn’t possibly be a dream.
“There there, little kingyo”, she offered me the brightest smile, unlike any other. And took my hand into hers.
“—Harunyan chooses you. Since you were the one to take my worries away for today.”
I hope that she knows she did the same for me. I couldn’t convey all those feelings into words so I wiped my tears, and I answered her with a most sincere smile. The most genuine smile I had in a long time. I wanted her to have it.
Her cold fingertips were gently pressed onto the glass of the aquarium tank as her gaze lingered upon the beauty beyond it. Her grip of my hand hasn’t loosened one bit. And her eyes reflected a whole new world; they were a momentary quide to marine life.
“This world holds such precious joys as these. Wouldn’t you say?”, her expression eclipsed the fascination of a child.
« People come here with an oceanwide labyrinth of troubles and worries; a heavy weight upon their shoulders. And the fishes would take them all away. The fishes will forget about them after three seconds, you see… so the worries will have all soon vanished. And people can smile freely, without having to put a mask over their heart. Isn’t it nice? Even if it’s for the short span of time they spend here, people can embrace the loneliness within themselves, and be happy. »
I remember now. The reason why I wanted to come here today, out of all the other places. My father’s words from when he took me here for the first time… I remember them clearly even now. Mmh, that’s right… I asked him how come all the people here are so happy and lively. I couldn’t help but smile, really. And seeing Kojima-san’s smile, I felt happier.
… I was truly glad I had a person with whom to share the scenery before my eyes. As it is, just like this, I want to always feel the warmth carved into her hand.
I want to remain like this for a little longer; for awhile.
Once these hands of ours will have parted , I won’t forget —our encounter will slowly fade into the depths of my mind, becoming a memory. A memory I will cherish dearly.
…
Before we have realized, it was already time to leave. Outside, the rain has stopped for what seemed like a few hours; the smell of the approaching night floating in the air. If I just look up, where the clouds start to break… I see the first evening star. The fragrant wind gently brushes my skin.
In the sight of a scarlet-colored sky, as we parted ways, she murmured the words which said: « Let’s both keep trying our best, okay? »
Watching her back growing further away into the distance, I figured that from afar Kojiharu-san has always seemed like a shooting star to someone like me; a little out of reach. Constantly shining, just beyond my grasp. Unapproachable. But today… I’ve finally reached her. The faint glow of her smile remained even now. That image is something that, surely, will linger in my mind eternally. I have it memorized.
人は誰だって
No matter who they may be,
心の片隅に
People carry on with their lives
少しだけ雲を
With a few clouds floating
浮かべながら 生きてる
In a corner of their hearts
For a brief second I closed my eyes, and smiled to myself. After all… loneliness is nothing to fret about. It’s inevitable, but always temporary. Just like the rain.
That’s why, in the nothing of an unseen future, I will continue to shine a little too. And I hope that we can light each other’s way again someday. Kojima-san.
« Thank you. »
-
Entry #38
Title: A Lonely Heart Without Friendship
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takahashi Minami, Oshima Yuko
Word Count: 1768
A Lonely Heart Without Friendship
As a child, you would think that there's always such a thing as 'forever'. The skies never seem to change. The roads were all the same. The slope up to hill to the park was always the same. Your mama and papa were always there to support you, to drop you off to school and pick you up, and to help you with the homework the little you had. The teacher was always sweet and nice. You and your friends were always side by side because your moms and dads let you sleep over.
But on the contrary, there is no such thing as forever. The skies do change, especially when it rains or snows. The roads are never the same, there's always construction somewhere on the old overridden road. The slope up the hill to the park doesn't lead to the park anymore, but to some kind of business building. Your mama and papa aren't always by your side supporting you, now they're too busy with work. Your teachers have gotten stricter. And last but not least, your friends no longer have enough time for you.
At least... it was like that for me.
-
Yuko was always something like a miniature social butterfly. When she was little, she didn't know how to stay friends with one person and often transitioned herself from one group to another, from one person to another, and she didn't have to try that hard. The longest she's ever been friends with another person was for several years. Three perhaps? Four? Probably.
I held the record for longest friendship with her. Perhaps it was because of our associated heights that she could relate to me as I could relate to her. Perhaps it was because she was so annoyingly easy to get along with and love. Perhaps it was just like that.
I'm not sure if she understood the pain that would be left behind when she left others, the feeling of emptiness and a living feeling of liveliness absent. To be frank, I didn't either. Not until it was my turn.
I knew her pattern though. I knew it wasn't long until she would leave me behind as a friend, but even as I prepared myself, the void of missing a friend was there and it wasn't pleasant. After her 'departure', I was often seen at the side of the playground reading a book or manga, or laying down in the middle of the field in peace during recess.
Despite having a shy character, I liked to protect others, or just defend them. But because boys were boys, their characters were nasty and always spit rude comebacks at me because I wouldn't let them have their way and bully who they wanted. I actually always had Yuko for that because I was sensitive to their comments. As I was her best friend one time and she was mine, she would protect me whenever she could.
-
After a few years in my solitude, it wasn't before long when news of her sudden transfer out of the state got around. The other kids threw a departure party for her as I watched sitting from afar, holding a book to my chest.
Somehow, the emptiness I felt turned into hatred, and as I watched her smile and laugh with her new friends, it made me want to rip the pages of the precious book I was holding. It made me want to kick the dirt until my shorts were dry and dusty, and tear the grass from its roots from the earth. But instead, I stood up and walked away instead, and I wasn't sure if I felt her stare behind my back.
-
Once, because of my blinding unreasonable hate, as she walked past by me in the hall with her to-be old friends, I whispered a, "Good riddance" to her on her last day. I knew she turned around to look at me, I saw her turn her head just as I was about to look at her.
But after a few years, I've felt far responsible for that. Did I leave something horrible for her to think about in her mind? Did I hurt her by saying those words? Did I make her feel uncomfortable or horrible for leaving? Did I make her feel bad for not saying anything? I didn't consider her feelings. If I could say it, I'm sorry.
-
Cue another three years in and I'm in high school now, as should she be. I haven't gotten any better at my social skills. I have a few acquaintances here and there, but they're nowhere close to being a friend like she was.
However, today, we had a new transfer student. And as she walked into the room, I felt shame fill me up as she smiled brighter than the sun could've and introduced herself.
"Yahoo~ My name's Oshima Yuko. I transferred out of Akihabara back in sixth grade, and now I'm back as a second year in high school! Please treat me well~"
The teacher excused her to sit in a seat near the back behind me, and in that way, I am completely visible to her. The shame in me messes with my senses. I can't tell whether she's looking at me, the board, or out the window. My heart is heavy as I copy down the necessary notes for the class.
Anxiety builds up likewise to my shame and impatience. It's stressing to know that she, my ex-best friend, is sitting behind me. The parting words that I left her haunts me unpleasantly with this thought. I can't ask for forgiveness. Not yet. Or maybe, not ever.
She taps my shoulder, asking me to turn around. Her head is down, resting upon her arm as she shows me her smile. Oh gosh, what did she want?
"I'm Oshima Yuko, what's your name?"
Ah... so she doesn't remember me...
"Takahashi Minami," I said with a distant smile.
"Minami, huh?" she repeated, smiling fondly. "I like it."
-
And that was the last time we spoke after a few weeks. Emptiness grew onto me again. It became my habit once again to watch her from a distance while she made new friends. This time, something unlike hatred, something I couldn't identify grew inside of me. It had the presence of hatred, but an aura of something else. It was and felt different...
I sat on a shaded bench across the field from hers' and her friends', slumped forward with a new book limply hanging onto my fingers, secure, yet still in danger of falling to the ground. My eyes gave out a set of longing stares at the friendship she shared with her friends. When she laughed, they laughed with her, or when they laughed, she would laugh. They would laugh at each others' jokes no matter how lame it was. When someone needed help, she wouldn't hesitate to comply, nor would the other party. If there was something to talk about, there wouldn't be a second thought to indulge into it. There was no hesitance, just friendship without any barriers.
It wasn't until a while that I realized the growing presence in me wasn't hatred, but something we commonly called jealousy. It became quick associates with the loneliness and emptiness in me. Nonetheless, the shy me couldn't say anything, wouldn't say anything. So I just sat there. Watching, and watching...
-
All my high school activities didn't involve watching Yuko all the time. I mean, I wasn't a stalker. I mean, not really. Sometimes it wasn't my fault. Sometimes I would see her randomly walking by with her friends outside of school, maybe just previously heading out of the theaters. I wouldn't know.
Right now, I was sitting on the roof, with the latest volume of my favorite manga in my hand, and a small lunch and drink. It was merely a sandwich and a bottle of juice. The sky was a clear blue today. There were no clouds to shade, but it was relatively cool and warm at the same time, the perfect weather for anything.
"Heh... so you read One Piece too," said a strangely familiar voice from behind me. I knew who it was before I even turned my head to see their face.
I nodded cautiously. She walked past me and leaned against the railing, her head on her arms. She looked up at me. "Which part did you like the most?"
I shrugged. There wasn't any particular part that I didn't like or love, but there were a lot of emotional scenes that just got to me.
She sat next to me, yet apart. She started to discuss things about it, leaving me no time to finish the manga in my hand. Normally, as I would've been annoyed, I felt a sense of peace and satisfactory. Her being next to me felt natural and normal, like we've been doing this - talking - for years.
Already, I could feel it. I didn't want our moment of friendship to stop. I didn't want anything between us to ever stop.
-
"Oshima, where is your textbook?"
A nervous chuckle. "I forgot it at home..."
"Well then share with someone next to you."
Coincidentally, her neighbor was absent. Coincidentally, I was in front of her. And coincidentally, I was the one she was most familiar with.
She pulled her chair over to my desk, physically asking me to scoot my chair further to the wall so she could sit without taking up the entire row. "Hey-a," she smiled, nudging me slightly and playfully.
Our seats were almost touching, leaving a two inch distance between us. The time slowly passes as the teacher prattled on and on about the subject. I feel something soft hover over my hand before it landed there lightly. I could see it was a hand. Yuko's hand.
I looked at Yuko, who just smiled wordlessly and softly grip my own hand in a hand hold. A folded post-it note was flicked over to my side of the desk. I opened it with the only free hand I had, unwilling to let go as much as Yuko.
"I remember. I'm sorry for leaving you alone."
My previously light squeeze on her hand tightened in a way that told her, "I forgive you." Her soft smile widened.
A new post-it note was thrown to her side before she looked at me curiously.
"I'm sorry too."
Instantly, I knew she understood what I meant. The face she made almost seemed to laugh. In reply, she squeezed my hand, complimentary to mine.
-
Entry #39
Title: Don't Look
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Suda Akari
Word Count: 1302
Don't Look
The SKE48 senbatsu members gather together in their practice room. After two hours of practising the latest summer song, all of them are exhausted and sticky with sweat.
“It’s so hot.” complains Suda Akari, sitting down as she stretched her aching limbs, flapping her shirt like a bird’s wing, attempting to cool herself down, unaffectedly.
“Let’s tell scary stories.” excitedly suggests Kizaki Yuria.
Akari stops and frowns. She was expecting someone to offer to turn up the air condition, which is located outside the dance room, being too lazy to do it herself. Instead, all the members start to excitedly chat about their own recently heard stories, making Akari sigh.
“Have you heard this one?” Hata Sawako timidly asks, sitting against the far wall.
Surprised, Akari gazes up at Sawako, the usually quiet character rarely heard above the other loud personalities. Members quickly swarm, and sit around her, intently listening. However, though she approaches, Akari just sits at the edge, not particularly interested in horror stories. Nevertheless, her ears perk as she hears Sawako’s voice, putting on her story-telling voice; monotone and slightly deeper. Sawako always told stories very well, being dramatic and well-articulated, turning even the most seemingly boring tale into something interesting.
With a deep inhale, Sawako begins her story.
~~~~~
A group of girls sat in a group, spending long hours after school just socialising with each other as high school students do. After watching a film, they ate, and now were in one of the girls’ houses, forgetting completely about the time.
Passing around a jar of olives, one girl noticed something.
“Don’t you think olives look like eyes?” she said, biting into the salty and sour cuisine.
“Oh yeah.” piped one, accepting the passed jar.
“Eww that’s gross.” squealed another, ignoring the jar, not suited for the acquired taste.
“Speaking of eyes, have you guys heard of the story about the woman who lost her eyes.”
“What?” sounded the others.
“Fifteen years ago, there was this story on the news that a young woman committed suicide. Apparently, she was blinded by her boyfriend in a fight by throwing boiling cooking oil at her as they were arguing while they were cooking dinner. Then, after she came home from the hospital, she broke into the house while he was at work. When he came home late at night, going to his bedroom, she jumped him and killed him. Then, with a fork, she ripped both his eyes out. Finally, she killed herself by jumping out of the house roof. Even now, they say that if you go past that house alone at night, she appears. She silently follows you until you are at your own home, and then she calls out to you. However, you should never turn around because as soon as you see her, you will freeze, unable to move. Then, with her fork, she’ll take out your eyes.”
There was a rigid hush when the girl finished her story. All a sudden, one of the girls jumped up making the others scream.
“I have to go.” she exclaimed, seeing the time and knowing she was to be in deep trouble with her parents.
“But its late.” said the one. “You should stay overnight.”
“I can’t. You know my parents. Besides, I only live like five minutes away. It’ll be fine.”
After a few protesting grumbles, the friends were finally convinced and with their quick goodbyes, the girl exited into the night. However, just before they closed the door, one of her friends called out.
“Whatever you do, don’t ever look back.”
The girl stopped and scoffed. “Please.” she replied. “I don’t believe in ghost stories.”
~
Her light steps sounded piercingly through the normally busy street. However, tonight, it seemed like no one was out or going home. With the weather chilly, though summer, the girl quickened her steps. Constantly shifting her gaze around the dark street, starting to feel nervous and skittish, she was relieved when her eyes spotted her house. Already at the door, she rummaged through her bag and took out her house keys. Pushing the key into the door, she was just about to unlock it.
“Look behind you.”
The whisper was so close to her ear that she automatically spun round.
However, nothing is there.
She scoped her eyes over the landscape. Hauntingly quiet, she thought it was nothing.
However, with closer inspection, she sees a shadowy figure by the far bushes across the street, their face hidden by the dark, facing directly at her. Instantly filled with pure terror, the girl felt herself freeze, unable to move even though she urgently willed herself to do so. Tears of desperation swelled in her wide eyes while her body trembled as her body chilled with panic. Her heart pumping furiously and her lips trembling, she kept her eyes on the approaching figure. She wanted to scream, but even her throat was tight and suffocating. As soon as the person steps under the street light, the girl is completely petrified.
The person was female. Or rather, used to be. Wearing a wearing simple grey dress, and with lengthy straight black hair, with a simple glance the woman was seemingly young and pretty. However, with closer inspection, you could see the abnormally pale skin, with white bones grotesquely poking from her frail and broken body. Then, there was her face. With ugly discoloured scars splayed across her ghostly face.
A terrifying sight.
But what made the girl truly horrified was that from the woman’s face, where her eyes were supposed to be, were two gaping holes. And from these black holes, blood fell and the dark crimson liquid dripped down from the ghostly pale face, passing the wide toothy smile on the woman’s face.
All of the air was sucked out of the girl as she stared at the eyeless woman, watching as she took out the glinting fork from behind her, easily stepping forward.
“Give me your eyes.”
~
The next day, the body of a school girl was found outside her home. No one knew who caused the death, or what, but what inspectors found extremely odd was what was taken from the girl. The only thing taken from the girl.
From her spotless body, both of her eyes were missing.
~~~~~
Sawako finishes her story.
After a silent moment, the members begin to applaud, sounding their amazement and exclaiming their fright.
Even though Akari didn’t want to admit it, she is chilled to the bone.
~
“See you tomorrow.”
After bidding farewell to the members, Akari heads the opposite direction, walking alone to her house that was only five minutes away from the studio. Immediately, away from the noise of the members, Akari notices how quiet the usually crowded street is. Her pores prickle with the oversensitivity as her senses tune into the still ambience. The deserted atmosphere makes her jumpy, with the slightest rustling making her jump. Though the air is warm as it enters her open mouth, the night is cool even though its summer and quickly Akari becomes cold as her nervous sweat begins to evaporate. Her footsteps loudly hit the pavement as she increases her walking speed.
Then, even though it has been only been five minutes in reality, it feels like hours before Akari is in front of her house. Finally she breathes a sigh of relief as she safely stands on her doorstep, taking out her keys. Suddenly, the hairs on her neck stand and a feeling of someone watching her makes Akari stop. She spins round but sees nothing. With a quick scope, Akari laughs at her own paranoia. With a light heart, Akari puts her hand on the door handle.
“Look behind you.”
-
Entry #40
Title: Fate of Love
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Jessica Veranda, Devi Kinal Putri; VeKinali
Word Count: 1710
Fate of Love
Jessica Veranda’s PoV
‘I have no emotion.’
—-
Sunset’s light passed through a big tree and made a shadow behind it. I sat below the tree while observing the most beautiful scene in life. I always spent my day here, below the tree and waiting for sun to set. Because in this hour, I can see your smile. Yes. For me, the most beautiful scene in life is your smile. You and your school friends always passing by this place at this hour. At that time, I quickly took out my drawing tools and began to draw your smile. I never forget your smile that has changed my life.
At the first time, I just got bored and when I walked around I found this big tree which perfect place for me to be alone. I sat below it while hugging my knee and lowered my head. I wanted to cry out but I just couldn’t. I lost my parents when I was child and I lost my emotion due the shock I got at that time. I never felt the thing named love since then. But, when I saw you for the first time, with your beautiful face, middle-short hair and a nice school uniform that you wore, I think I have fallen in love with you in the first sight. Not only that, I love your smile the best.
I didn’t have enough courage to approach and talk with you. So, in the next day, I came to this place again while carrying my drawing tools to draw your smile. At least this was the only thing I could do. I wish someday you would recognize my existence then approach me. I want to be your friend, or more than that. So I could smile and laugh with you.
One day, when I saw you with your friends passing by, I didn’t see your smile. You pouted all the way. I wondered what did happen to you. But it seemed you had a fight with your friends. You didn’t chat with them like you always did before. I even saw your friends scolded and shouted to you. Could it be they bully you? At that time, I really wanted to help you but I couldn’t.
After that day, I never saw your smile anymore. When you passed by this place, you were all alone. Where were your friends? Did they leave you alone? How could them. I didn’t know what I should do. Almost every day I drew your smile because I couldn’t smile and drawing was the only way for me to convey my emotion. I wish I could make you smile again, but how? I myself couldn’t smile and I wanted to make you smile, that just impossible.
Suddenly, when I looked at you, you also looked at me as our eyes met. I quickly looked away and without realizing, I blushed hard. How embarrassing. Then you approached me and sat beside me. I didn’t know what exactly you were doing. But I kept look away to hide my blushed face. I also hid my drawing. I didn’t want to you to look at it yet. After that, you started a conversation. You introduced yourself, and which made me surprised was when you said that you observed me all this time, like I always did to you.
After heard that, I introduced myself and said the same thing as you. You got surprised but then you laugh. Was I dreaming? I could see your smile right in front of me. Too bad, I couldn’t smile with you though I felt really happy that time. You realized that and asked me why I never smile. I said to you the truth that I lost my emotion when I was child. At first I was afraid if you would think that I was weird, but after seeing your smile, I believed that you would be able to bring my emotion back.
After that we talked a lot about our self. You didn’t think that I was weird. You even said that I was unique and interesting. We shared each other problems, from being lonely until about our parents. We found that we had a lot of similarities and we were match to each other. My heart was beating faster and faster, and my feelings toward you grew stronger and stronger.
We chatted a lot and without realizing it was already dark out here. We were too busy talking nonstop. Before went home, I decided to show you my drawing, so I took it out and showed it to you. You got surprised again and suddenly you hugged me. You hugged me really tightly while I was blushed hard. After that you broke the hug and we stared to each other. We stayed at this position for a while, until you said a sentence that made me at my highest happiness.
“I love you.”
Due the happiness, I smiled and cried at the same time. You really brought my emotion back. The only thing that could bring my emotion back was indeed a thing named love, and you just gave me that…
==========
Devi Kinal Putri’s PoV
‘I don’t have any friend.’
—-
I was always lonely. My family was rich and because of that I rarely met my parents. They went to work all day. Never had a time for their only daughter. I was lack of love. At school, I didn’t have any friends. My classmates, they just took an advantage from me because I was rich. Every day after school, I had to accompany them to arcade or mall until sun almost set. After that we went home together. Even though I always chatted and laugh with them, I never thought of them as my friends.
But then, when I was passing by a big tree on my way to home, I saw you. You hugged your knee and looked down. Were you crying? You were alone below that tree. Suddenly, you raised your head and looked at me. I quickly looked away, and when I glanced a little at you, I could see your beautiful face, with your long straight black hair which makes you look perfect in my eyes. How I really wanted to approach and talk with you, but I couldn’t. I was afraid if my ‘friends’ would be mad at me.
Actually, my classmates wanted to be my friends because I gave them money. Before that, I always got bullied by them and other students at my school. That because I was weak. That’s why I didn’t have any choice except paid them to not bully me and become my friends. Then they gave me one condition. I must not play with others beside them. At first I against it, but like I said before. I didn’t have other choice. So I accepted that and since then they became my ‘friends’.
I thought this way was better than being bullied every day. But I was wrong. Since the day I saw you, I got that its better being alone than have a lot of fake friends. Every day I passed by a big tree, you were always there. You with your drawing tools. I wondered what you drew. Day by day I observed you. Though I always looked away every time you looked back at me. I couldn’t forget you from my minds. Maybe I have fallen in love with you.
Because of that, with my little courage, on my way to home, I said to my friends that I don’t want to be their friend anymore. As I expected, they all got angry and scolded me. I just lowered my head. I didn’t dare to fight back or even look at their eyes. After they got tired for scolded me, they left me and said that I must be prepared for getting bullied again tomorrow. But I didn’t care. What I want was just a true friend.
The day after, I went home all alone. I didn’t regret it. Then I passed by the big tree and I saw you. You sat alone like always. I stopped for a while and watched you. Not long after that, you realized that I was watching you. When our eyes met, I smiled at you, but then you blushed and looked away. I approached you and sat beside you. You got startled and quickly hid your drawing.
I started a conversation by introduce myself. I even said that I always observe you. After heard that, you blushed all the way. Then you introduced yourself. I got surprised when you said that you were also observed me all this time. I also laugh after I heard that. But weird, I never saw your smile even once, so I asked you about that. You told me that you lost your emotion.
I didn’t think it’s weird at all. I never met a person like you before so I thought you were unique and interesting. Then we continued on chat and without realizing it was already dark and I forgot that tomorrow I still had class. So I excused myself to go home but you stopped me as you wanted to show me your drawing. When you show me your drawing, I surprised plus happy because what you drew was me. I really didn’t believe that. I hugged you to say thank you, but when I broke the hug and we stared to each other, I felt like my heart beating so fast.
‘I love you’ I said. I could see your eyes suddenly became watery and your lips shaped a smile. Looked like your emotion already back. Then you hugged me tightly like never wanted to release me from your embrace. I put my hands around you and tightened the hug to feel each other warmness.
“I love you too”
You whispered to me between the hug. I really really happy that you replied my feeling. After that I broke the hug and stared to each other again. This time, I slowly put my lips against yours. You kissed me back as I could feel your soft lips…
‘Thank you for the love you gave me’
-
Entry #41
Title: Of a Bird and a Peculiar Frog
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Furukawa Airi, Takayanagi Akane; Furuyanagi
Word Count: 2487
Of a Bird and a Peculiar Frog
Akane could not control herself any longer and pushed forward with her advances on Airi. It was during their hotel stay together (for work related purposes!) that Akane got really fed up with Airi's continuous babbling and squees about how cute her Rena-san is in a swimsuit for their PV shoot. Heck, Rena is cute alright, Akane thought, but all of the participating members are cute too, and they too were in swimsuits, yet Airi pays them absolutely no attention.
'I know I shouldn't be thinking about it like this but...' Akane thought in annoyance, 'I was there at the shoot too, wearing almost the exact same thing as Rena-san. And Airi has not uttered a word about me at all.'
“Akane? Is everything alright? Are you tired? We can go to sleep now if you want.” Airi asked seeing how Akane has grown all quiet all of a sudden. Akane's frown must have been very obvious that even the oblivious Airi has expressed minute concerns about her well-being.
Akane, who is trying exceptionally hard to suppress her jealousy and the temptation to stop Airi from talking nonsense with her own lips, answered with the most normal voice she could conjure up at that moment. “Yeah.. Everything is fine. I'm not tired..”
“Oh, okay. That's good to hear. Yeah, so by the time we got back to the shop, Rena-sa----”
“Stop!” Akane raised her voice, cutting off Airi. “No, I change my mind, everything is not alright. Nothing is fine. You should stop talking about Rena-san because I can't hold myself in any longer!”
“Eh?” Airi blurted in surprise.
The mixture of surprise, innocence, and confusion on Airi's facial complexion at that very moment awakened Akane's predatory instincts that were very carefully and securely kept deep inside her. With her conscious logical mind completely thrown off the window, Akane slowly, but firmly push Airi down onto the bed and positioned herself on top of her.
Airi's eyes widened as she quickly realize her situation (beneath Akane). Akane could feel Airi's hands applying very little pressure on her shoulders in an attempt to push herself away. Akane smirked at Airi and took a mental note on how feeble Airi's resistances were.
Akane closed the distance between the two slowly. And at the moment it started, it ended. The contact was very swift and light. It seemed almost as if Akane's critical mind has resumed it control before things got messy. But when Akane pulled back and saw that inexplainable look of desire in Airi's eyes, she dived in again and captured Airi's lips with much more aggression.
The night that followed was a really awkward one. Airi became mute and hid herself under the blankets, while Akane, who even though regained her usual composure physically, freaked out massively about her outbreak of impulsive sexual emotional frustration. However, despite the freak out, Akane did not regret her actions at all, mainly because the kiss felt amazing and Airi, who was incredibly shy and passive at first, kissed back with equal, if not more, passion.
_______
The incident happened around a week ago, but Airi still could not get it out of her head. Airi often finds herself replaying the moment over and over in her head. The distraction has become so increasingly obvious now that Airi is receiving concerned remarks from other members during rehearsals.
“Airi-san, did something happen between you and Rena-san?” Ishida Anna asked with a hint of concern in her voice, snapping Airi out of her inner turmoil.
“Huh? No. No.” Airi responded trying to look as calm as possible.
Anna, though unconvinced with Airi's reassurance, thought it would be inappropriate to press on the issue and asked no further. Not long after, Anna left the dressing room with Manatsu, but leaving her words lingering behind in Airi's mind.
'No, nothing happened between Rena-san and I, but with someone else, and that's exactly the thing that is bothering me..' Airi thought.
Not before long, Airi's mind wandered back to Saipan, to the beaches, members in swimsuits, Rena-san, Akane, the hotel, and the things that happened when all of those are combined together. It's not like Airi disliked it or anything, in fact her feelings deviates far from dislike, which led to another problem.
She has been avoiding Akane like plague for the past week, because looking at Akane even just a fleeting glance brought back to many fresh memories..
'...of how soft and sweet her lips tasted on mines-' Airi gasped at her vulgar mind. Shouldn't she be trying to discard these thoughts away instead of drooling over how dominant Akane was in the hotel room, or how that aggressiveness drives her submissive heart off the chart. She shouldn't be recalling how hard her heart pounded in her chest as Akane pulled on her chin slightly to make way for a more convenient entrance. Airi gasped and blushed again for the nth time of the day for retreating back to those thoughts. It is impossible now for Airi to look at Akane in the eyes without burning her face red or averting away immediately.
'What if Rena-san finds out about this?' Airi panicked, 'This is not right. I can't betray her for someone else! Wouldn't this be equivalent to oshihenning?'
Airi has been too occupied to notice that the dressing room is now vacant except for two souls. The other members have already left for home or dinner hangouts with each other. From the other side of the room, a sharp pair of eyes stared with a predatory intently at Airi drilling holes in her ridiculously thick skull. The intensity of the glare resembles that of a ferocious eagle on hunting, yet Airi remained in complete oblivion untouched by it. Not before long, the owner og the eyes had to give up such a vengeful act and approach Airi with another method. She has been waiting for this one on one confrontation void of pesky member who liked to meddle with other people's business for a very long time. There is no way she will let this opportunity pass by without fruition.
“Airi!” Akane cried causing Airi to blip out of her trance to see Akane standing on the opposite side of the table, arms hanging stiffly to her sides and her fists clenched tight. Her cheeks are puffed up showing signs of annoyance, and are tinted with a pinkish hue. Akane's signature side-ponytail is tied clumsily on the side of her head loosely in an amiable way. The sadness in Akane's voice was touched slightly with desperation. Airi blinked at the image in front of her and after two seconds, realization his her like a brick wall in the face. She is alone with Akane in the dressing room, god knows if the door is locked, and Akane is furious judging from her voice and expression (although she doesn't look like it). Airi knew that she needed to say something, anything remotely intelligent, and fast.
“He-y.” Airi managed to pathetically squeak out. Upon hearing Airi's voice, Akane began to stomp from her initial spot to stop in from of Airi. Airi gulped as she saw Akane's white patterned jacket move closer and closer to her face (she didn't dare to look up).
“Look at me.” The younger commanded in an ice cold voice. Airi meekly raised her head up only to see those eagle eyes piercing into the pit of her soul. She shuddered and felt presperation droplets form on her forehead. She wanted to wipe them away before any of it slid into her eyes, but Airi lost control of her nervous system under the tension. Somehow, the increasingly heated dressing room became filled with Akane's scent which made the Hentai agitated. Akane bent down to decrease the distance between them and then suddenly swooped in for a quick kiss. In the 0.65second time that Airi had to react, Akane has already pulled away. Immediately after, she felt a strong tug on her right arm and she was slammed against the metal green locker of the SKE dressing room, causing a loud bang. Luckily, her head did not come into contact with the locker, but before she could move away, Airi found herself sandwiched in between the very, very cold metallic surface of the locker and the very, very warm, smooth and incredibly soft skin of a too familiar bird loving girl. Airi could feel herself breathing in a mixture of Akane's hot breath and the cool air-conditioned air. The combination of extremes made the situation very arousing for Airi, and she wondered how emotionally deprived Akane must have been in order for her, right now at this moment, to act like a sadistic yandere girl high on aphrodisiac. Not that it was a bad thing. Airi gasped when she felt Akane's knee push up against the area between her thighs.
“A-Akane! What are you doing!?” Airi exclaimed as she tried to feebly push Akane away from their extremely provocative position. “Someone might walk in and misunderstand!”
“Eh? What are you talking about? What is there to misunderstand?” Akane feign innocence with a smirk. “It seems pretty obvious what we're doing.”
“You're out of your mind!” Airi cried. “What is Rena-san knows about this?”
“She won't. Unless one of us tells her, which I don't believe will be happening, ne, Airin~” Akane grinner triumphantly, sending shivers down Airi's spinal cord.
“What if Jurina walks in?” Airi half-shouted out of frenzy. The moment those words left her mouth, Airi realizes that she had said them a couple of notches too loud and hopes that they did not appear offensive to Akane, especially when Jurina and Akane has been rather close laterly.
“Jurina has nothing to do with you and me, so it doesn't matter. You know what, Airi? The person I want right now is not Jurina.” Akane frowned and leaned closer towards Airi's ear. Airi could feel hot breaths on her ear as Akane breathes. Warmness crept up Airi's neck as she awaits, impatiently, for Akane to finish her sentence.
“But you.. Airi.” Akane whispered, causing Airi to squirm at the tickling wind caressing the delicate parts of her ear. Despite the situation they are in, Akane expressed her feelings in a tone so solemn that it drove a hefty sense of guilt up Airi's throat. This roller-coaster ride of emotions may be too much for the otaku, completely inexperienced about relationships and romance, to handle. Those mangas Airi had read offered no real applicable solutions to the complications she is facing presently. Real life, sometimes, is unexpectedly complicated and strenuous.
Airi struggled to find the right words to reply, and she is also quite unsure whether if there need to be a reply to Akane's words at all. Deciding that choosing the wrong word and voicing out opinions in the wrong way is probably not the method to go, Airi wrapped her arms around Akan's waist for an embrace. The action may seem out of character, but it is a genuine one. Akane was surprised at first by Airi's display of intimacy, but then calmed down immediately when she felt that the arms around her had the familiar stiffness and uncertainty to it, which is unique only to Airi.
Airi's heart rattled away as they hug. She was glad that she had chosen not to say anything, but instead had gone for the physical resolution. It was as if all of Akane's temper melted away as they touch, leaving only a level-headed, yet a tad crazy girl behind. The sight and warmth of a normal Akane relieved Airi from all former tension, and she relaxed in the younger girl's arms, engulfed in each other's presence. After a while, Akane loosened her grip and shifted out of the embrace. The distance between them was optimum for a close range eye contact. Akane's dark brown orbs were deep and unreadable.
“Seeing you always appearing on Rena-san's blog and how you two flirt with each other all the time... had made me.. jealous.” Akane said, looking away from embarrassment and bitterness. “It really burned. And I thought that if I try hard enough, I could achieve everything I want, and I don't really have a reason for holding back like how I did. Now I know though that that isn't always the case. I think, Airin, that maybe I've tried too hard and that pushed you away from me even further. I want to admit that I have given up all hope about you reciprocating my feelings...” She paused, took a deep breath to relieve herself from the accumulating pain in her chest. Airi watched Akane's expression flash in pain, so she grabbed hold of their hands.
“..But honestly, that's just what I want myself to believe. I really can't give up, no matter how hard I try, not when every time we go out with each other on our so called 'dates', and not when you keep on looking at me with those eyes.” Akane finished in a crackling voice.
Airi stood still allowing those words to sink in. Akane likes her, not in a friendly way, but something a little bit more, that she have guessed. Airi warmed up slightly to have her hypothesis confirmed. This is the first time since high school (and that was quite a long time ago) that she had been confessed to. Being obviously lacking in this department, she didn't know how to respond properly. Normal confessions only need replies like 'yes', 'no', or the clichéd 'give me some time to think about it', but Akane didn't really ask a question, it was rhetorical. Airi didn't know what to reply, and, no longer able to suppress them, her discomfort and embarrassment became visible to Akane.
“I'm sorry I made you feel weird and stressed. I just want you to know that I love you, Airin, and that you should appreciate yourself more. I'm not expecting you to feel the same way because I know that Rena-san is the only one for you.” Akane said, voice quivering. “I guess I better get going. You should go too, Airin. It is getting late.”
Akane picked up her belongings and headed to the door, not bothering to look back at Airi, who is in a messy confused state.
“Wait! Churi!” Airi called out, turning to meet Akane's confused face. “Don't hastily make conclusions by yourself. I'll think about what you've just said. So please wait until then okay? Is that fine with you?”
Akane brightened and smiled softly. “Yes, it is. Just tell me when you have the answer. See you later, Airin.”
Then she quietly left the room, leaving Airi standing alone.
-
Entry #42
Title:Her only reason
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Shimazaki Haruka, Mori Anna
Word Count: 1267
Her only reason
Shimazaki Haruka once wore a bright smile on her face. One that was big enough to even make her eyes seem like they themselves were smiling. Her smile, as how everyone would else put it, seemed like it was a star.
But before she knew it, it was gone.
Along with her, her smile was gone.
Motivation, emotions, everything. It felt like all of them disappeared. She couldn’t even bring herself to ‘give it her all’ in her performances. She felt empty.
Without Mori Anna beside her, she didn’t feel like doing anything.
It’s funny, really. How even though she’s been doing things half-heartedly now, she still receives a huge push by the management. A push that’s big enough to even give her a lot of antis. But that didn’t matter to her. It’s not like she wished for it anyway. People can hate her if they want to, she couldn’t care less.
Because she knew that everyone noticed it too. How she isn’t being herself anymore.
Her talks were now dull, her answers all half-hearted and even though she still puts on a smile on her face, be it to her fellow members, senpais, or in photoshoots and taping, they were all hollow. Empty. A mere mask just to shut everyone up.
Sadly, Akimoto Yasushi seems like he can’t understand anything at all. Giving her countless of roles in AKB even though she obviously didn’t ask for them. She knew that she could have turned down his offers, but by doing so, she also knew that it would be like rubbing to the others’ faces that she’s acting like a spoiled princess, turning down wonderful offers that the others would kill for. She had no other choice but to accept.
Sometimes she can’t help but wonder: What is AKB for her?
At first, in the past, she could answer such a question confidently with cheesy lines like “My life” or “Everything”. But now she found it hard to agree with those words anymore.
Sometimes, she can’t help but be amazed at how one person could affect her so much.
There are times where she wants to ask this one particular question to herself too-
“How long are you going to remain butthurt about her graduation?”
The first person she heard that from was Oba Mina, right after she joined Team 4. She couldn’t even answer such a normal question straightly. And at that time, the only thing she could do was move her mouth open and close again and again, almost resembling a goldfish in search for water.
While she had no idea on what to say, however, she had the urge to simply shrug it off with a “Forever” too. Because to be honest, she believed that she will remain hurt about it until she herself graduates- or hell, maybe even by then, she’ll still be butthurt.
Mori Anna was, and will always be, her only motivation- her only reason for living after all.
She greatly depended on her. She clung on to her as if she was her only lifeline. But then she still disappeared. Even though she wanted to stay with her forever, even though she wished to be by her side until she dies and even though they promised to each other that they will be together until the end of time, Mori still left.
And now she felt like her own world was empty. She felt like no one could understand her anymore. In her eyes, everyone seemed like they were thinking of nothing but evil plots on how to make her suffer- she felt lonely. She had no one to rely on anymore, no one to share secrets with anymore.
Now that she’s gone… Well, the idea of leaving AKB was slowly starting to sound tempting for her.
It would be better if she does that anyway. With her doing everything so half-heartedly, she was more than sure that the others wished for her to disappear already- to give them all of the offers she received and she’s currently putting in a waste.
The leading roles for two dramas and then a leading role for a movie too, appearances in commercials, in variety show. All of those, she participated without even putting much energy into it. And now she even won the Janken tournament which she hardly cared about. After all, she simply used scissors all throughout the game, hoping that someone would beat her. But then the opposite happened.
Sometimes she can’t help but wonder, is this fate’s way of mocking her?
She knew that the feeling of ‘Happiness’ came up to her at the very moment she knew that she won. Hell, she even got excited about it, putting on a surprised face while scanning at the venue with wide eyes, but then that feeling didn’t last long at all.
Because she knew that even though she won, it won’t change anything.
Even though her winning of the tournament was announced nationwide, even though her face was plastered in the newspapers the very next day, it’s not like it would mean that her dearest Nanchan would suddenly come up to her just to congratulate her.
Though secretly, she did hope for something like that to happen…
After the Janken, she kept her phone in her hand, after all, immediately flipping it open whenever it vibrates in hopes that she would see the name “Mori Anna” on its screen. Be it a mere message or a wonderful call congratulating her, she just wanted to have a short conversation with her again.
As time passed by, she felt like her chest was slowly sinking away. She could hardly pay attention to anyone by then at all- though she was kind of happy that the others came to her just to congratulate her- as the only thing she had in mind was her phone.
But then, even after waiting for hours,
Even after keeping the small gadget in her hands from budokan up until she was lying on her bed, it never came.
And as soon as the digital clock beside her wrote 12:00 AM on it, she decided to give up, tossing her phone aside while smiling to herself pitifully,
“It’s no use… I won’t hear her voice anymore…”
Shimazaki Haruka once wore a bright smile on her face. One that was big enough to even make her eyes seem like they themselves were smiling. Her smile, as how everyone would else put it, seemed like it was a star.
But before she knew it, it was gone.
Along with her, her smile was gone.
Motivation, emotions, everything. It felt like all of them disappeared. She couldn’t even bring herself to ‘give it her all’ in her performances. She felt empty.
Without Mori Anna beside her, she didn’t feel like doing anything.
It’s funny, really. How even though she’s been doing things half-heartedly now, she still receives a huge push by the management. A push that’s big enough to even give her a lot of antis. But that didn’t matter to her. It’s not like she wished for it anyway. People can hate her if they want to, she couldn’t care less.
Because she knew that everyone noticed it too. How she isn’t being herself anymore.
And she was more than sure that it will never come back again,
That smile everyone used to compare with a star.
-
Entry #43
Title: Path of Captain, Path of the Center
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takahashi Minami, Maeda Atsuko, Takamina the 5th, Acchan 13th, Shinonome Kanata, Motomiya Nagisa
Word Count: 1283
Path of Captain, Path of the Center
None can deny that the first Center Nova was Maeda Atsuko. Of course, the position as such did not exist during her time, and the Kirara had yet to be discovered, making discovery of true idols easier, but many claim that had Kirara been available when she performed Yume no Kawa, the song written specifically for her own graduation, near the conclusion of the AKB48’s legendary Tokyo Dome concert, that they would have glown much brighter than they did even at the Lancastar concert of 0048, wherein the 9 performing Kenkyuusei shone brighter than records of any Center Nova, even the legendary Acchan the 13th, display.
It is universally accepted, even by those who refuse to acknowledge Maeda Atsuko as the Center Nova, that Takahashi Minami was the first leader of AKB48. Akimoto Yashushi may have created the group and written it’s songs, and Togasaki Tomonobu may have been the first theatre manager, but the first leader is universally recognised as Takahashi Minami, so much that it is said she was recognised by all as the leader of some 200 girls even before the Tokyo Dome concert officially made her the General Manager. It is testament to her skill that all subsequent Takamina’s in 0048 have shared her leadership, and some say the Shinonome Kanata of the 75th generation kenkyuusei also shares those abilities, and would be the ideal candidate to inherit the position. Some claim she already should have.
The succesor to Takahashi Minami as AKB’s leader is not recorded in the annals of history. It’s claimed she once named Yokoyama Yui as a potential successor, but some feel she remained the leader of AKB for it’s entire existence, only ceasing to be such when it died during the Great Space War and AKB0048 emerged as it’s successor.
The successor to Maeda Atsuko as Center is similarly not well known, although in that case, due to a knowledge of her graduation taking place immediately after the Tokyo Dome concert, there are clues that we can look at to guess the truth. Two possible choices are the only two members to take the Center position while she was a member, ignoring the winners of the Janken Tournaments, only Matsui Jurina and Oshima Yuko had achieved this. Additionally, the limited footage available from the song UZa indicates the pair did in fact serve as W Center for that song. However, Yuko is generally discarded as a candidate due to her age at the time. The other two generally considered candidates are Watanabe Mayu, who receives focus near-equal to Maeda’s in Manatsu no Sounds Good!, the last song featuring Maeda, and Shimazaki Haruka, who Akimoto-snsei is known to have had his eye on at the time and happened to win the Janken Tournament immediately following from Maeda’s graduation. No other possibilities really exist considering ages, although some think the choice should be a girl as young as Maeda was when she was chosen as Center.
It’s generally accepted that every Takamina also served as Team 00 captain during their time in 00, with Takamina the 3rd even serving as Center Nova at the same time, matching Yamamoto Sayaka’s legendary feat. The question of who held the position when there was no Takamina is a whole different question. It’s agreed that at times the position was held by successors of both of Takamina’s fellow legendary captains Sayaka and Yukirin. A few times the position had been held by Umechan’s, Yuuko’s, Mariko-sama’s and Minarun’s but Takamina, despite only 5 having served throughout 00’s history, is the most common name in the records of 00 Captains. It is even noted that Shinonome Kanata, the girl touted by numerous fans as the ideal Takamina, serves already in such a capacity for the Kenkyuusei. Despite this, many feel she will never succeed the position, though some believe Takamina the 5th will graduate soon enough.
With the Center Nova the records are fully up-to-date and readily accessed, and a gallery of all Center Novae’s last Profile photo’s prior to graduation is stored in the 0048 dorms and a digital version can be viewed on the 0048 site. All of the remaining first generation members at the time of Maeda Atsuko’s graduation have at least one successor appear in the gallery, as do the most well known of the following 3 generations, as well as successors of Akicha, Yuihan, Paruru and Kaoru. The last 5 to hold the position are the aforementioned Takamina the 3rd, Yuuko the 7th, Yuihan the 6th, Miichan the 5th and Acchan the 13th, the Center Nova to create the brightest light from Kirara on record. Unfortunately, no record exists of the activities of any Center Nova following graduation, save for the rumblings that Miichan the 5th is somewhere on Atamistar. Only one member directly expected to become Center Nova has failed to do so, after her announcement it was widely assumed that Acchan the 12th, appointed in 0041, would be Center Nova following Miichan the 5th, instead she was graduated suddenly and within 3 years at the legendary Lancastar Concert her replacement was not only wearing her name, but also claimed Center Nova for herself, although given the success of that particular Center none can truly mourn her loss. At one stage it was even teased that the 0048 central mainframe ‘Aimi’ would take the stage as the latest Center Nova, even gracing the stage to perform Ice no Kuchikuze, which, in hindsight, is when we should have recognised the ruse.
Looking to the future, there is no clear direction of what the future may hold. Takamina the 5th seems content to remain in the seat she has held since at least 0041, and it is possible Kanata will not remain in the organisation by the time she graduates. The Center Nova position hasn’t been held since the day Acchan the 13th graduated in 0046, though many presume that the next Center Nova is amongst the 9 kenkyuusei who performed at the Kenkyuusei Concert at Lancastar, given the lights they spread on that day. Exactly who amongst those girls could succeed is something there is intense speculation about, though none doubt Kanata’s eventual position. Her generation mate, Kishida Mimori is another story, her age being considered it has fast become a joke amongst fans that she will eventually serve as the successor to Oya Shizuka. Of the 77th generation members though, the favourite to inherit the position in Sono Chieri, some even positing she will be the first full member to serve under her own name, though no-one really knows who she could succeed. Ichijouji Yuuka is also considered often, some claim she was the first to produce a Kirara amongst the 9 during the evacuation of the Lancastar concert, before that same event continued. Few believe Aida Orine to be ready to achieve her goal of succeeding Sashiko, therefore discounting her, but a number believe Shinonme Sonata to be a candidate in a way that would mean she succeeds Matsui Jurina, her age making her the perfect candidate for both. However, aside from Chieri, the most vocal support for Center Nova goes towards Motomiya Nagisa, similarities with Acchan have bee used and some areas of the fandom have already began to proclaim her as Acchan the 14th.
Addendum: Year 0098.
By this time 0048 was all but destroyed, the nominal Center Nova is the only known existing 0048 member, Acchan the 26th. It is hoped that the group will return to one of it’s former levels of strength, and through that be able to have a new Center Nova, and captain, once more. If anyone reads this and knows of anyone who could succeed Takahashi Minami, Shinoda Mariko, Itano Tomomi, Kojima Haruna, or Minegishi Minami, please send them to allow for the rebirth. Party ga Hajimaru yo.
-
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Entry #44
Title:Moving Forward
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Akimoto Sayaka, Miyazawa Sae, Matsui Jurina, Oshima Yuko; SaeYaka
Word Count: 2999
Moving Forward
"Matsui Jurina is the future of AKB48. Possibly the next center. Now having dual positions between SKE48 team S and AKB48 team K, the young girl is full of surprises. Coming live from Akihabara Theatre is former Team K captain Akimoto Sayaka. Let's hear her thoughts about Jurina's seedy rise to fame."
The reporter walked over to me and I only smiled as the bright flashes of the cameras flicker in my eyes.
"Tell us your thoughts about the young Matsui Jurina. Do you think she will do fine in both SKE and AKB?"
" I personally think Jurina will be fine. Things are going to get tough but I'm sure that if she works hard and keeps her focus on the task at hand then she will be fine."
I manage to pull a fake smile that I am just so good at doing. The reporter buys it and ends up leaving me alone. I don't need the paparazzi on me if they're just going to flash bright lights at my eyes and ask me questions I've already answered dozens of times before. To be honest it was getting really annoying. I sometimes wish they would all just go away and leave me alone. Just stop bothering my and and pretend I never existed.
I walk away from the large group of reporters and head to my car. As I pass them I hear the same rumors I hear everyday. Everyone says the same thing everyday. They say I'm going to be the next one to graduate. Now that I'm no longer the captain of team K, everyone thinks I have no other reason to be there. And to be honest I think their right. I never make the top in Senbatsu and ever since that dumb scandal I've never been looked at the same way. To be honest I've been starting to question why I even joined AKB in the first place. I hate being lost in thought. Because then people sneak up on me without me noticing.
"Hey Sayaka!"
I jump and turn around to see the new team K captain Oshima Yuko. Yuko and I are good friends. The only difference is she's in the top Senbatsu and I'm part of the Under Girls group. It's not that I don't like being part of the group it's just that I hate being pushed down. No matter how hard I try to strive for the top I always get pushed back down. Yuko on the other hand is lucky. She has everything people look for in an idol. A cute face, a great body, good bust and an overall good personality. With me on the other hand I always get told I look like a gorilla and I've been told I act like a guy. I'm as flat as a board and I have a six pack which isn't normal for girls like me. I should be more like Yukirin or Mayu but instead I look like someone you'd see in a female wrestling program.
"So are you coming to the party tonight?" Yuko asked.
"What party?" I said.
"The Welcoming Party. Remember you wanted to welcome Jurina to team K by throwing her a welcoming party. You should remember since you're the one who planned the whole thing."
"Oh yeah that's right. Where is it again?"
"At the karaoke bar next to the maid cafe. Come on Sayaka get with the program! We've been planning this since Jurina go transferred."
"I will. I just need to go home and freshen up. I'll see you later Yuko."
"Alright I'll see you. At six so don't forget!"
"On it."
Yuko left and I got in my car and drove home. I had completely forgotten about Jurina's welcoming party. I thought it would be nice to throw it since she was probably going to be nervous so I thought it would be a great way for her to get to know everyone. But right now I don't feel like going to a party. Right now I just want to lay on my bed and not move. I just want to rot away and hope no one notices me. I don't want to go out into world knowing I'm only going to get judged. As I lay on the bed I hear the door bell ring. I walk over and open it and was surprised to see Miyazawa Sae who was supposed to be off to Shanghai.
"Sae? What are you doing here?" I say.
"I heard you were having a party and you didn't invite me? Now that's mean Sayaka." she says in that peppy voice she always has.
"I thought you were leaving for Shanghai which is why I didn't ask."
"Baka! I'm not leaving until next week. We can still be together for a while!"
"Yeah but then after you're leaving and you'll be gone for a whole year."
"Mou quit being such a downer! I'm coming in!"
Sae pushed past me and charged into my home.
"Jeez Sayaka this place is a mess!"
She was right. I hadn't cleaned my house up in days ever since I found out Sae was leaving. I just came home and had a fit throwing things across the room and screaming. Things got so bad that my mom made everyone leave the house and stay at a hotel.
"Where are your parents?"
"They're out."
"Well then instead of you being alone here then how about we head out to the party! It should be starting soon."
"I don't think I can go. I have a headache." I lied.
"You don't look like you're in pain. So then let's go!"
Sae grabs my arm and starts to pull me. But then she stops and her entire face scrunches up into a look of disgust.
"God you stink Sayaka!"
"That's because I just came from practice."
"Go take a shower."
"No I'm not going to the party."
"Do it or I'll make you."
"Try it."
Sae got a pout on her face and I couldn't help but smirk. Sae knows I'm stronger than her and knows she can't beat me in a physical fight.
"If you don't get in then I'll spray you with a hose."
"You can't be serious."
"Really?"
I watch Sae walk to the kitchen and over to the sink. She pulls the extension line and aims it at me.
"This is your last warning."
"You wouldn't dare..."
"Would I?"
I next thing I knew, I was blasted with cold water right in the face. I turned so I had my back facing the line of fire and tried to protect my face.
"Alright I'm going!"
I run to the bathroom and get in the shower. I let the warm water run down my body. It was so soothing and relaxing. For once I didn't feel as upset. I was actually content and didn't want anything to ruin the moment. But then there was a loud pound on the door and Sae shouting from the other side.
"We don't have all night Sayaka!"
I finish up and then get out. Before walking out of the bathroom I look at my body in the mirror. It's a natural thing for me to do. I try to point out all the flaws in my body so I know why I can work on. I see my legs need to be shaved and toe nails clipped. There are more wrinkles on my face than from last time I checked and I think I'm starting to get crows feet.
"What are you doing in there? Hurry up!"
I open the door and Sae screams and covers her eyes.
"What?"
"But a towel on or something Sayaka!"
I remembered how Sae didn't like me running around naked after a shower. But everyone else in my family does it so I don't see the big deal. It's my house anyways. I come back out with a towel on and Sae smiles. Then she takes my hand and leads me to my room where she has all my clothes laid out. I guess she wanted my to pick my outfit. I grabbed a black on piece and some cute heels. Sae shakes her head at me and makes me put the clothes down.
"Sayaka we're going to a karaoke bar not a five star restaurant."
Sae picks out my outfit which was jeans, a T-shirt that says "Fighter" on it and some sneakers. To be honest I thought it was too causal but Sae looked pleased with it so I had no choice but to go along with it. I wondered why I was taking fashion advice from the girl that was ranked Ugly in the past four fashion shows we've had on AKBINGO.
When we arrive at the karaoke bar the place is surprisingly packed. Lot's of people must come here and the fact that it's a Saturday really doesn't help the situation. I didn't want to come. I didn't want to be in front of the others. I was afraid what they would say. I haven't talked to any of the other members since the concert and those who did try to talk to me I ended up blowing off. Now I regret that and wished I hadn't because now they were probably going to give me an earful for ignoring their calls. We walk into the room we reserved and already saw Yuko and Jurina waiting for us.
"It's about time you showed up!" Yuko said.
"Sorry. Mrs. Slowpoke here wouldn't hurry it up." Sae said as she took a seat next to Yuko.
"Sayaka you should've told me. Then we could've scheduled a later time."
"Oh no it's fine. Besides I probably would've been late regardless."
"That's so true."
I shoot a glare at Sae who only smiles and laughs it off.
"So where are the others?" I asked.
"They all had stuff to do so it's just you, me, Sae, and Jurina!"
"Great."
"Now let's get this party started!"
"Yuko quit shouting people can hear us on the other side."
"Really?"
Yuko walked over to the wall and knocked on it three times. A couple seconds she got three knocks back.
"Ahh! How scary!"
"I told you."
"Yeah yeah anyways let's get started!!"
The ones who mainly sang were Sae and Yuko. To my surprise Jurina didn't sing once and I wasn't going to either mainly because I didn't want to. I looked over at Jurina who was staring in awe at Yuko was was reenacting the dance scenes from a KARA music video. The girl really knew how to flaunt her stuff. I watched Jurina and how she reacted to Yuko's movements. Jurina seemed so into them. It was kind of cute. I can see why people say Jurina is going to be the future. She's basically going to replace Mariko when she graduates so it's only a matter of time before it happens. But by then I'll probably over and done with AKB. For a while now I thought about quitting and want to do something else involving acting. But yet somehow I managed to stay.
"Sayaka you sing now!" Yuko said.
"Uh no thanks. I'd rather not."
"Come on~" Sae said.
"Do it for Jurina. You want to see Sayaka sing to right?"
Jurina nods her head excitedly. Seeing how I have no choice I had to follow.
"What song?"
"I got one picked out for you."
Sae hit the play the button and the song began. I immediately knew the tune and glared at Sae. She was the one that picked up the song. Why out of all songs this one. I hold the mike with both hands and hold it up to my mouth. Then I sing with a sad tone in my voice.
ore wa hitori de
hageshii ame no naka
zubunure
utaretetakatta
yogoreta karada to
minikui kokoro wo
arainagasou to shitetanda
konna jidai ni
nani wo shinjite
ikite ittara ii no darou
toikaketemo
kotae wa denai
kizutsuku koto wo
osorete wa inai
donna ni kitsui
michinori mo
chippokena chippokena ore wa
maenomeri ni
tatta ippiki no mushi ni naru
At this point I start to feel like a real bug. What is my point of existence if no one listens to me. I'm ugly and no one will listen to me. No matter how hard I want to cry out no one hears the cries. I want to reach out and touch the light. I want someone to see me. I want someone to hear my and know that I'm here and I'm not some random person in the background. I want them to know that I am someone and I want to be noticed. I won't be stepped on and crushed. I won't be walked over. I will be noticed and I will step up to the spot light one day.
I feel like quitting but Sae and Yuko encourage me to go on. I press further and reach the ending of the song.
inochi no kagiri
buzama demo ii sa
jibeta de sakebu
tamashii yo
ikiru koto ikiru koto ore wa
shigamitsuku
kizutsuku koto wo
osorete wa inai
donna ni kitsui
michinori mo
chippokena chippokena ore wa
maenomeri ni
tatta ippiki no mushi ni naru
As I finished the song I realized that no matter what happens I won't give up and I will keep on trying. I will do my best and go out there on the stage and give it my all. I won't let my fear and doubts stop me. I won't let people get in my way. This is my life and I get to chose what I do to it. I live it out and no one else. No one controls me except me. Even if I'm small and no one pays attention, I will do all I can and hold onto to what is dear to me for as long as I can. I won't give up and I won't back down. This is my life and I plan on living it to the fullest.
After the party, Yuko takes Jurina home and Sae comes home with me. We enter the house and sit on the couch. Then Sae moves in close to me and says,
"You were awesome tonight."
I blush and look away. But then she forces me to look at her.
"You want to know why I picked that song?"
"Yeah."
"Because I knew you were going through time Sayaka. I know with all this stuff going on with Jurina and the reshuffle that things but me tough for you. I picked that song because it's your song. It's the song that was made for you to sing out your heart and soul. It was made so you could share your feelings with everyone else and let them know what it's like to be you. Let them know that they're not alone and they're not the only ones that struggle. This song is your song and no one else can sing it except you."
I look at Sae with a serious gaze. Her eyes were swirling with all kinds of emotions. Sadness, anger, hate, the same eyes I had when I first started in AKB.
"I'm sorry Sayaka. I'm sorry I'm leaving you. I'm sorry for not being able to be by your side. I guess I'm not your eternal partner after all."
"Don't say that."
"Eh?"
Sae looked up at me with tears starting to form around her eyes.
"Don't say that Sae. No matter what you will always be my eternal partner. I will always be with you and you with me. Nothing can separate us because we're the Twin Towers of AKB. I'll do my best her to support AKB and you do your best in Shanghai. Just remember that even thought we're apart, we'll aways be together in here."
I place my hand on Sae's heart and she starts crying.
"Come here."
I embrace Sae in a long hug as the usually peppy and cheerful genking cries her heart and soul out onto my shoulder. Usually I'm the one who's crying. But I guess today Sae wanted to be the one to let her heart out. I could see why though. She's always happy around the others but if you ever see her alone she's always crying. That's one of the many things Sae and I have in common. We're both good at hiding our emotions. So on nights like these when it's just the two of us, we cry on each other's shoulders and let out all the pain stored up in our hearts because we know that we'll always be there for each other.
"Sayaka..."
"Yes?"
"Promise me that when I'm gone... you'll never stop thinking about me?"
"I never have Sae and I never will."
We enjoy each others company one last time before saying our last final good bye. After that night Sae and I never saw each other again. I never even said good bye at the airport because that night was our goodbye. And now I'm all alone with no one else to go to. But even if I'm alone, I'll never forget Sae. She's going be gone but I know when she gets back I'm going to welcome her with open arms.
"Come back soon Sae. I'll be waiting."
I'll be waiting for her right here. This is her true home. Her true home is here at AKB in my arms. I will never let go of her and hold onto her for as long as I can because she is the one I love. While Sae is off in Shanghai furthering her career, I will be here doing my best to make it to the top. And even if I don't I will still try and never stop. I won't back down and won't run away. I will keep moving forward.
-
Entry #45
Title: Little Monster
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Gakuran, Gekikara; Gakuran/Gekikara
Word Count: 1898
Little Monster
I knew I shouldn’t have let you leave so soon a couple days ago.
There were still things I needed to talk to you about, to ask you, to explain.
Plus, there was this strange gut feeling inside that told me to keep you a bit longer.
Yet I blew it off.
So I feel like it’s partly my fault that you got stabbed by that crazy Yabakune girl, landing you in a hospital bed a couple rooms down from mine.
I could barely eat the first couple days as you got carted in and out of the emergency room. Shaku practically had to force feed me, and even then, I had no appetite.
“She’ll be okay. That one’s reaaalll strong, y’know?” She tried to comfort me one day, even though she was obviously just as worried.
“Mm.” I acknowledged her comment with a small nod before looking down to play with the little origami crane you gave me, cradling its fragile wings in my hands. It’s become something of a habit of mine recently.
“You guys have gotten pretty close this year, huh?” Shaku spoke up again. I responded with a small tilt of the head, trying to feign ignorance, before she swatted my arm.
“Don’t act stupid with me. So…when did it start?” She pried with that goofy smile.
“I don’t know. We’re in Rappapa together so it’s normal to become friends, isn’t it?”
“Well, yeah but you and Gekikara ha—“
“I’m taking a nap. Good night.” I flopped down with my back towards her.
After a few seconds of incoherent mumbling, retreating footsteps and the door sliding shut, I was left to my thoughts.
The truth was I remember exactly when we started getting close.
—-
Five months ago…
“Ne, Gakuran. I didn’t know you were smart.” You blinked at me while nibbling on the end of a pencil. That better not be on its way towards my nose.
“It’s Youran now. And I’m only in the top percentage because this is a yankii school, it’s not like Majijo is known for its academics.”
“Mm, sure.”
Was that not a satisfactory answer? You haven’t budged an inch from the side of my desk, only continuing to stare as I threw my books into my bag.
I stood up to leave while you kept gnawing at the eraser, eyes cast down in thought. The fangirls who wanted to greet me after class dispersed the moment they saw you next to me.
“Uhh, can I help you?”
You looked up with those big round eyes, blinking stupidly before grinning at me.
“Yes! I promised Yuko-san I would graduate this year you know…”
“And?”
“I need you to tutor me.”
—-
“Does that make sense?”
“No.”
I sighed. You didn’t understand a single thing from our course material, so I had to backtrack to teaching everything from 2nd year. Yet even that made no sense.
“Umm…okay, let’s put it this way.
If you break this pencil into three parts, and then break my pencil into 4 pieces, how would you add this and this to get a fraction answer?”
“Hmm…
Break them all until they’re both have the same number of pieces?”
…she actually got it.
—-
After pulling the metal stool up to your bed, I sat down to watch over you as you slept. Visiting hours were already past, but since I was only a few doors down, I could easily come over without the nurses noticing. Even though you woke up from your operation yesterday in stable condition, blurting about meeting Yuko-san, I’m still worried sick about you. While your complexion was always light, this sort of paleness made you look overly skinny and weak.
Otabe had told me what you said to her, about knowing fear for the first time.
And it was most apparent when you slept. Every once in a while, your eyebrows would furrow as you turned and tossed violently, only calming down when I held your hand in mine.
I never would’ve imagined it last year, but since our time together has grown, I started to realize you were almost like a child at times.
You’re impulsive. Not completely morally sound. Have a short attention span. Constantly wants to play. But most surprising of all is when you’re not covered in blood and giggling like a maniac, you’re incredibly innocent.
—-
Three months ago…
I walked through the clubroom doorway, cursing the kid who kicked down the door repeatedly. Every time I went to the trouble of bolting it back, she would come back in a couple days to look for a fight, knocking it down again.
“She should be the one fixing it if she wants to break it every week. I didn’t get promoted as one of the queens just to be a repairman, sheesh.” I grumbled before sitting down on the bench against the wall, finally snapping out of my thoughts when the sound of sizzling hormone didn’t greet my ears.
“Nobody up here today?” I stood before heading towards the inner door, rapping on it. “Otabe?”
No answer.
Turning the knob, I poked my head in to see you sprawled belly-down on the floor, your left cheek smushed against the crack of an English textbook.
I choked down a laugh. So much for the fearsome Gekikara.
When you’re not mad, you honestly resembled a kid. Especially compared with the other queens from last year. With those round eyes, pretty face, and innocent expression, a normal person wouldn’t ever be able to guess that you’ve been sent to correction for nearly killing someone before.
As I laid my coat over you for extra warmth, a particular thought crossed my mind for the first time.
You’re kinda cute.
—-
“Gakuran!” You suddenly looked up in the middle of one of our study sessions as if you just had a revelation.
“What?”
“I like your hair this way more.” You smiled at me while reaching out to stroke my carefully combed locks. Even though I still tried to ignore it, I could feel my heartbeat thud loudly as your face came within inches of mine.
“Thanks to you for cutting up my headband last year.” I scowled jokingly before swatting the hand away.
“Mm, good job, me.”
—-
“Guess what?!” You skipped into the clubroom one day, with your hands holding something behind your back.
“You didn’t break any pencils today?” I randomly guessed, earning the enthusiastic applause of Wota in the background.
“Actually, I broke two. But look!” You shoved a piece of paper in my face, so close that I couldn’t see anything but white. “I got a 82 on my test!!!”
“Really??” I jumped up in genuine excitement before snatching it out of your hands. And sure enough, there on the exam paper, a big red 82 was circled in marker.
Next thing I knew, you wrapped your arms tightly around my waist. The light smell of cotton candy made its way to my nose as your warm body leaned into me.
Now here’s a couple things I never would’ve expected before.
One, that I would get a hug from you.
Two, that it would feel so good. And so right.
And three, that it felt better than hugging Atsuko.
Ignoring the speechless expression on Team Hormone’s faces, I gladly returned the hug.
“I’m really really proud of you.”
—-
But there was one thing that still bothers me.
Even though I grew to like you more and more everyday. (I was even starting to feel guilty about losing my maji for Atsuko.)
I feel like my feelings would never be reciprocated.
Or more like, the creature that is Gekikara wouldn’t know how to reciprocate those feelings.
I know that you love Yuko, the previous queens, and cared for the rest of the new Rappapa now, but that was all friendly love and respect.
Does Gekikara even know what romantic love is?
—-
“Ohayou.” Your raspy voice greeted my ears as I lifted my head from the side of your bed, our fingers still intertwined.
“Ah, ohayou.” Looks like I fell asleep again.
“Thanks for watching over me.” You smiled while gently tightening your hold.
“Ah, don’t worry about it.” Why do I start feeling shy when you look at me like that? It never happened with Atsuko before. And it sure as hell didn’t happen with Daruma.
“Gakuran.” You said my name gently, but without the usual playful air. “I’m a little mad.”
“About what?”
Your eyes moved down to our hands as you started to fidget. Your eyebrows furrowed again as a small frown graced your lips.
“You and Shaku. I never got to ask before this happened.” You point towards the right side of your stomach.
Ah. That.
Honestly, I was so worried about you since then that I completely forgot about that. Or the fact that you walked in on it.
—-
5 days ago…
“Gakuran…” Shaku closed her eyes and puckered her lips, inching closer by the second.
I chuckled, not realizing that she was still coming closer. Since joining Rappapa this year, Shaku had started to vocally pronounce her newfound crush on me. I shot her down continuously, and I’m pretty sure she knew that I wasn’t interested. But she never seemed to give up.
It wasn’t fair to let my fangirls shower me in love but not let her, she said.
By the time I looked up again, she was within mere inches of me.
Ah, hell. Maybe if I act like a really bad kisser, it’ll be enough to make her lose interest.
Yet when I closed my eyes, it was your face that I saw in front of me.
So of course when the sound of the door snapped me out of it, and I saw you staring at me, I tried to play it off. Badly.
—-
3 days ago…
“Shaku, about the day Gekikara got stabbed…”
“You mean our almost-kiss?”
“Uhh…yeah, that. I just want to apologize. I don’t—mmrphh.” She stuffed a peeled apple into my mouth to shut me up, like I was a roasted pig or something.
“Yeah, I know, you stupid playboy.”
—-
“So there’s nothing between us.” I finished explaining, watching the look of realization dawn on you. A second later, a big grin spread across your face.
“Yokatta.” It was barely above a whisper, but I heard you loud and clear.
“Why were you mad?” I asked, trying to suppress a grin when the question visibly startled you. You didn’t know how to answer.
“I…I don’t want anyone else to…” You trailed off as you grew more confused by the second.
But I don’t need to hear the rest of it.
I understand well enough.
I shifted my spot on the bed before carefully pulling you against me, avoiding the still raw wound on your side. I felt you relax into the hug, resting your chin against my shoulder with a sigh.
Maybe it’s possible for a little monster like you to love me back after all.
-
Entry #46
Title: Cat on the Ribbon
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Takahashi Minami, Kojima Haruna, Minegishi Minami and Shinoda Mariko; KojiTaka
Word Count: 2837
Cat on the Ribbon
Akihabara is a district of Tokyo. Akihabara was also known as Akihabara Electric Town. Akihabara is a major shopping area for electronic, computer, anime, and otaku goods, including new and used items. Around 2006, a man name Akimoto Yasushi made a Gakuen in Akihabara. And the gakuen’s name was AKB48.
It was a normal all girl school,but theres a special class which is divided into 3 class and only about 20 people were allowed in the class.The 3 class are A, K and B. The way they divide the special class is by the Principal.The top in those special class was that they doesnt have to pay for lunch,school fees,the AKB goods too,have special uniforms and special classroom,they are allowed to eat during the class, have their own private room,they doesn’t has to go to class, and has free laptop in the class rooms. You will never know when the principle will shuffle the class student and when will more students in the special class increase. And I should tell you about my first love.
Let me introduce myself. My name is Takahashi Minami a girl at the special class, I am the class rep in class A and the girl who is standing beside me is Kojima Haruna my best friend but I call her NyanNyan.
”NyanNyan~ I failed with my science quiz and I have to retake it.” I told her but she didn’t care much.
”So? Just don’t give me your baka virus.” she said coldly. She is so cute and beautiful but…why does she has this cold heart? If she has my good personality she would be even more popular. And of course she knows that I want her to help me with my retake quiz but she acted like she didn’t care. I look at her and try my best at my puppy eyes and look and NyanNyan. I tried to make my voice to sound cute as I said NyanNyan~~ She looked at me with some cold eyes with the face your disgusting.
”Stop it Takamina your so disgusting.”
See!! And how can she do that??!! She know it obviously that I was trying to act cute but she meant to tell me that isn’t she so bad?
”Anyway I won’t help you with the retake quiz since I am very busy not like Takamina.”
”What do you mean by that! If your like me it’ll be better!” I protested.
Now she look at me with a pity face witch makes me wants to punch her and that face piss me off.
”Takamina are you serious…?” she asked me.
”Of course I am always serious!!” I told her but she didn’t seem to care and guess what she told me.
”If your serious then you wouldn’t fail your quiz bakamina.”
She called me bakamina isn’t she so mean!!?? So if you add something and then mina at the end you will be calling me?! Misomina? Takomina?! This really piss me off so I decide not to rely on NyanNyan! Shes too terrible.
I take out my phone and text mii chan by the way mii chan is minegishi minami another best friend of mine. I wait for 5 minute she didn’t reply me. I decide to wait another 5 minute because I even make the tittle emergency! Its no way that she will ignore me as after all I am her best friend. But after 5 minute she didn’t reply I had the why face.
”Isn’t it because you never! reply message so mii chan decide to not reply your message.” that cold witch told me with no expression on her face.
The reason why I don’t reply is because! why do you have to text while you can call? You can even hear their voice am I right? And I am a very busy class rep! So then I decide to use call and why did I text her while I don’t have to. So I call mii chan and ignore what NyanNyan said. Mii chan accept the call very fast but she didn’t sound so happy in the call.
”Moshi Moshi?” the first thing I said to her.
”Huh..What?” she answered in a low voice.
She sounded so mad that I was so scared to talk to her but I must talk if I don’t say anything and end the call I would just be putting oil on the fire. So I breathe out and in and finally talked.
”Ah mii chan? You know I failed the science quiz! And I have to retake the quiz! So I want mii chan to help me!!” I said it as fast as I can to try to not waste any time since mii chan sound very very mad.
”I am very busy not like takamina go ask haruna to help you.” mii chan answered as she ends the call.
Why is she so cold like NyanNyan? Why are my best friends so cold like a ice?? As I do the OTZ action.
”I can teach takamina if you beg me.” said NyanNyan. By the way you have to kneel down also.
Oh my when I have a request for my friend I need to beg and kneel down? Does all friends is like this? But when I was at other school it wasn’t like this!! I have no choice well probably other choice but I still decide to kneel down at NyanNyan ,but then she told me that she was joking I was happy to know that my friend still have a warm heart. We walked to NyanNyan’s private room. When we went in I saw nothing but trashes and clothes I was so supprise because I just helped her clean up 2 days ago. I cannot find the table and a space to sit when I look at NyanNyan she has no expression on her face and tell me to get in. Why can she be so normal?! I tell her lets go to my room but why does she has to be a sellfish queen?? She refuse because she is LAZY to walk and she tell me to clean up the room for her! What in the world am I to her? A maid a servant?
”A no use butler” NyanNyan answered.
Huh? She can read my heart???? What in the world?? But why? why? why!! my body is moving its self I start cleanning up the room why? In the dump of trashes I found a empty can tuna, the new latest magazine, a black sock with no other pair, bikini?!, broken alarm, the one piece manga she borrowed from me… which is also wet, her phone, her psp, and c..chopstick!? well there are more but I am too lazy to list them all. After 40 minutes later the room was much cleaner at least I was sasitified with it and for some reason there was a bed.
”Hm… Normal… 4/10” NyanNyan suddenly said.
Whaaat? Whats with that? She sounds like she is a queen or what!! Is she the high class one and I am the low class. But! of course I didn’t tell her since what if I made her mad and later she refuse to help me again? So I take out my notebook,textbook and test paper I try to cover my score but NyanNyan took it away. Then she laugh at me and she told me that I had no help I think she laugh for 15 minutes.
”Your so smart~” NyanNyan laughed at the same time with a pity face.
This piss me off alot so what? What if I am bakamina! Hmp!
”But..This is the first time seeing this low score 0.5 out of 100?”
Hahahahahahaha…Why did she said it outloud?? If theres a hole I want to go inside.. So I went to sleep on her bed.
”Oi….”
NyanNyan sounded really scary this is the first time I saw NyanNyan this mad and the reason is really stupid.
”Your lying on my teddy bear…”
Eeekk!! I really can’t describe her scary face!! I hurried and stand up and shouted I AM SORRY!!! So loud ,this is also my first time shouting that loud.
”I decide now I will not teach bakamina now.. I will only lend you my notebook.”
I have no choice but to study myself,when I open NyanNyan’s notebook it was so bright…The words are all pink,orange,yellow,red,blue and purple. I was a little bit supprise and I even saw a drawing of dog and cat. I also found a page with a drawing of me,NyanNyan and Miichan for some reason I am the ugliest one and NyanNyan was the prettiest one. I read it but I still can’t remeber I write them serveral time but I still cant remeber anything I was also starting to lose concertration. Then I take a peep at NyanNyan hoping that she saw me in trouble so she would help me but she was reading her magazine. Later I saw she start playing a galgame…. I heard my voice in the galgame since she is playing the galgame that the characters are base on the students in special class. What I am really sad about is that NyanNyan she dump me!! And she choose to be with Mariko sama , Mariko sama is Shinoda Mariko another student in the A class sometimes NyanNyan will talk with Mariko sama about fashions. The noise of the galgame is distracting me alot I became curious since I never play it before not so long I found myself sitting beside NyanNyan and watching the game. Later I went closer to see the screen better which distract NyanNyan so she move away alittle bit which I follow along.Finally NyanNyan say something.
”Takamina go study and get away from me. Don’t lean on me your heavy..”
”But…your distracting me…” I told her which I can see that she got pissed.
”Then go to your room Bakamina”
”Eeeh….” I was lazy to go back now I told her to plug the earphone or close the sound but she refuse since she don’t like me ordering her around. She even say that if I lick her feet then she would listen but of course I won’t do that. Sudenly mii chan come in without knocking and she start talking with NyanNyan about some game I don’t know. Then later they decide to go to mii chan’s room. I don’t want to be here alone so I follow them.Suddenly NyanNyan stop walking and turn around at me.
”Oi Bakamina go study”
”Why do you have to call me Bakamina??” I asked her since no one would like to be made fun of.
”Because you got 0.5 at your quiz” NyanNyan said
I think that it wasn’t my fault but Mii chan start laughing I think my face has starting to be red as an apple.
”Your so smart Takamina no maybe I should also call you Bakamina~”
Mii chan made fun of me I feel like I am going to explode. I tell mii chan to stop making fun of me since I am still older than her. But she refuse and she say that she don’t like to be order around especially Bakamina. And she said that if I buy her a big cake and a milk tea she would not call me bakamina only today.
I feel like that she is so simillar with NyanNyan probably because NyanNyan showed her bad example and she didn’t followed me the good example well I may not be smart but NyanNyan is only good at Science! But mii chan!! She is good at very subject why can the god be this mean?? Oh so thats why she has the bad personality.
I write the vocabularys many times and read it again and again I feel like I remeber some of the vocabularys but then suddenly NyanNyan disturb me.
”Takamina go back to your room.”
”EHHH??!! Why?” I asked her isn’t it so suddenly? Asking people to go back to your room is she my mom or what huh!? But I am so jealous of mii chan being able to play with NyanNyan….Is not that I wanted to play with NyanNyan okay?! Is that….I wanted to play….
”Bakamina,your too noisy and I have a secret to tell mii chan…”
What in the world can’t she tell me??? Only Mii chan??! I am getting so angry…maybe I was getting jealous. I was mad and jealous I went outside angrily and slam the door to show my anger. I ran to the kitchen of the school just to get a glass cup and to eavesdropping what are they talking about. I couldn’t hear much but bakamina so I am sure that they are talking about me and not so long I heard mii chan shouting and NyanNyan telling her to be quiet. If I was mii chan in that situation NyanNyan would tell me to shut up instead of be quiet. Later I heard NyanNyan saying bye to mii chan but forgot to hide. The door open I almost fall down then I saw NyanNyan in a shocked face. I don’t know what to do but I ran away I look at the back and saw NyanNyan chasing me in a ridiculous speed. I was in a big supprise since NyanNyan was suppose to be a slow runner maybe she was mad. I ran in the hallway and met Mariko sama in the way she stopped me and tell me not to run since its dangerous well since NyanNyan was running in a ridiculouse speed I was scared and just apologize to Mariko sama and continue to ran and I looked back hoping Mariko sama would stop NyanNyan but all she did was give NyanNyan a high five. I ran to the gym and now I notice that I was really bakamina since theres no place to run at the gym. Suddenly I saw NyanNyan at the door of the gym I was freezed NyanNyan seems so tired and I wants to ask her if shes fine but now is not the timing my heart was beating very fast. No one really speak for 5 minute since we’re both tired and it was really awkward. Suddenly NyanNyan walks toward me and asked me if I hear what they are talking about.
”So..takamina hear it??”
I wasn’t sure what should I tell her but I just said some. NyanNyan’s face was so red and she say tell me what you heard. My mouth was very dry and I was sweating alot and I starts to speak and my heart was beating very fast.
”You were talking about love?” I was just joking around but I didn’t expected it to be true. NyanNyan’s face became so supprise and bright red.
”so…you know…my feelings…..?” she asked me with her face so red her eyes with curiousity “takamina whats..your…answer??..”
”Huh???” I was so confuse what she was talking about.
”So takamina know that…I ..likes …you right?..” she asked ,but my head was still blank. A few minutes later my brain finally isn’t blank and I finally hear what she said and I shouted EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?? Later a footstep was coming near us so NyanNyan pulled me and hide beside the cones and other equipment in the gym. I heard Mariko sama’s voice.
”Huh? Whys the gym’s door open so big?? geez… as the student council I must close it now since I am responsible for this!” after saying that Mariko sama closed the door,locked it and skipped away.
NyanNyan and me was still in a supprise to notice that we got locked. Suddenly NyanNyan stand up and asked me.
”Nee….Takamina…did Mariko sama locked we inside here??”
”Well…She wasn’t meant to do it but she did lock us inside.”
NyanNyan’s face was in supprise and suddenly ran to the door and punch,kick,slap the door but no one came. I also ran to the door and did what NyanNyan did still no answer. We gave up since we’re so tired and we went to the stage and sit down.
”Takamina…You also like me..? Not…as a friend…” NyanNyan suddenly asked me.
I was supprise and I told her that I wasn’t so sure but I think that I likes her. Then NyanNyan smiled she say thank god that at least she wasn’t really dumped so she say that lets go slowly and I agree. Suddenly I got something on my mind so I ask NyanNyan.
”Can’t we just call Mariko sama to open the door?”
NyanNyan looked at me in a supprise face while taking her iphone out and starts calling Mariko sama which is so funny.
Later Mariko sama unlocked the door and apologized. I invited NyanNyan to my house for sleep over and the day had ended.
-
Entry #47
Title: Good Night
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Miyazawa Sae, Akimoto Sayaka
Word Count: 1271
Good Night
“Sayaka where did you go…” the girl with short hair in a white dress thought to herself. She had been running and searching for her partner. It was raining that day, All she heard was echoes from her footsteps, which she carefully tried not to make. She didn’t want to get discovered by that man. Her foot was covered with cuts and now dirty from the wet floor, her white dress… well its not even white anymore. It has got all sorts of stains on it, stains which looked like blood, but it wasn’t hers. She wondered how she got there in the first place.
Last night after she had watched a movie with Yuko she immediately went back to the hotel to find Sayaka sleeping. She went to go change and went to sleep. Then she woke up here. In this cold abandoned place. She saw some other girls too, but they weren’t alive any more. Somehow she managed to escape her cell. She couldn’t remember how, she was still trying to process what had happened.
For now she just focused on finding the other girl who was two years older. She stopped at a large empty room. She saw a figure standing on the other side, whom she recognized.
“Finally” she thought. She ran towards her but stopped in the middle. She thought something was up since the other just was just standing there, she had her head down.
“This is bad” she thought to herself and ran faster towards her partner, but It was too late.
The older girl fell down on the floor but the younger one managed to catch her. She saw the sharp object that was penetrating the other girl’s back. She had lost a vast amount of blood and, felt her partner trying to breathe.
“S-Sae….” The older one uttered. Holding on to the younger one’s arm tightly, and desperately trying to tell her something. Sae looked at her, she was still shocked about the whole thing. “Sayaka…”
“Run.” Sayaka gave her partner a last warning before collapsing on her partner’s arms.
Sae couldn’t move she just sat there, holding on to Sayaka tightly as the warmth escaped from her body. She didn’t know what else to do. Like a stone she just sat there frozen. Tears started to form in her eyes, why would this happen to someone as sweet as her?
“Sayaka…” She started to calling her. Shaking her so she could wake up. “Ne, Sayaka… Weren’t we going out of this place together? Wake up! Sayaka!” crying and still in denial. She didn’t want to leave her there.
As she was sitting there she felt a sharp pain on her throat. She felt a warm fluid come out from it, she touched the wound that had suddenly appeared and looked at her hand. Her throat was bleeding and she started to choke, letting go of the body she was holding. The pain that she felt made her want to scream but the cut was too deep, which made that even impossible.
She collapsed beside the body of her partner, then she turned to see the person standing behind her. The cause of her pain, the one who brought them there. Before, she wanted to run away, but now that didn’t matter anymore. Her partner is no longer alive and in a few minutes, she will probably join her later too.
The Man was wearing a mask which covered half his face. He also had blood all over his body. It seemed that he had killed more people since the blood that was decorating him seems fresh. She had wondered what kind of creature was behind that mask. She was sure of one thing though, he probably isn’t human.
He held up the hammer that he was holding and gave an eerie smile. She looked at him with horror as the hammer made contact with her head. You can hear something crack open. She probably flew a few feet away from where she was laying. It was like he was playing golf.
He took both of the bodies back, dragging them both leaving a trail of blood everywhere. It didn’t matter. The place was abandoned anyway.
He placed one of the girls on a tiled table, she was barely breathing. He then threw the dead one on stack of bodies beside it. He started sharpening one of his knives, whistling.
He held the girl’s head back. Her eyes looking at him, but that doesn’t bother him much, He found it amusing actually. He gave another one of his sick and twisted smile as he held the butcher knife up. The last thing the girl saw was the knife going down to her neck.
The only thing that could be heard was a loud crack that echoed the room.
-
-
-
-
The girl gave a horrifying scream as she woke up from her nightmare, which woke up the person sleeping beside her.
“Sae?!” Alarmed, the girl instantly turned to her looking concerned. She placed a hand on the younger girl’s cheek.
“S-sayaka?” The girl said in surprise. She then gave a sigh of relief since all that happened was just a nightmare, and they are both safe and sound. The older girl gave her a hug to calm her down. “Did you have a nightmare?” She asked.
Sae could only nod and she started to cry. Her partner smiled at her and told her to go back to sleep. She held her again and started to stroke the younger one’s hair. “Don’t worry, I’ll be here to protect you”.
Sae smiled. Suddenly, she felt a sharp pain on her throat again. The same pain she felt on her dream.
She looked at her partner confused at what just happened.
Sayaka was just smiling at her, but it was the same smile that the man gave in her nightmare.
She help up the knife that she was holding on her right hand, It had Sae’s blood on it. The older girl kissed the younger one’s forehead, before stabbing the poor girl’s heart.
“Go to sleep now, Sae.” are the last words the girl heard before she closed her eyes.
-
-
-
-
“GAH” Sae woke up, breathing heavily and sweating. She rubbed her face as she had two nightmares in a row. She tried to calm herself down and she looked around to see if everything was clear just to be cautious. They were back at the hotel, no serial killer, no knives, no hammers, no dead bodies, just Sayaka. She was sleeping on the other bed opposite to Sae’s.
“Ah mou… Why did I watched that Suspense movie with Yuko last night…” She sighed, scratching her head.
”S-sae…” Sayaka called sleepily which made the younger girl startled. “Y-yes?” She asked still afraid from her last dream.
“Are you ok? I thought I heard you scream…” She said still very sleepy. “I’m fine Sayaka… I just had a bad dream…” Sae tried to explain but it seemed Sayaka had fallen back to sleep.
Sleep talking? How cute. Sae thought as if forgetting about her previous nightmares.
“Good Night… I love you.” She told her partner before going back to bed.
“Good Night, I love you too”.
A reply back, making Sae look at Sayaka’s direction. She had been listening the whole time even though her eyes were closed. She smiled and went back to sleep.
-
Entry #48
Title: Home
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Yamamoto Sayaka, Watanabe Miyuki, Matsui Rena; SayaMilky, Sayaka/Rena
Word Count: 2657
Home
“How come every time I come to your house there’s a different pair of shoes?” Sayaka asked calmly.
“Sayaka, please, this is all a—“
“Miyuki, frankly, or, actually, luckily,” she rolled her eyes, “I don’t care. I don’t care if you’re cheating on me. I really don’t, believe it or not. What I care about is that you didn’t even put the minimal effort of hiding your affair from me. What I don’t like—hate, is the feeling that I’m getting treated like a maggot. You know what else I hate? I hate that you know I’ll keep on coming back to you no matter how bad you treat me,” Sayaka tried her best to hold her tears back but that didn’t work too well; it never worked well when she was up against Miyuki. “And I want to say I hate you but I can’t say that even in my head and I hate myself for that. I want to fucking shoot myself in the head for thinking that for even a moment but at the same time that idea is so stupid I just want to kill myself. Why… why did we have to become like this? Why couldn’t you just love me back?”
“I do, Sayaka, I just—“
“Then you weren’t supposed to do it like this! I know I’m being ridiculous, but I can’t stand it if this another guy gets to stroke your cheeks! OK, maybe I do care if you cheat on me. In fact, I care about it more than anything else! Why can’t you just put in the little effort of hiding those things from me? Am I asking for too much?” Miyuki couldn’t say anything to her. All she could do was to embrace her and let her tears wet Miyuki’s shoulder. Sayaka held on to her tightly.
Was it all really Miyuki’s fault? Sayaka thought, feeling calmed down by Miyuki’s scent. All those guys and girls Miyuki met never cared if Miyuki was a cheating slut. Whether or not they were in because of the sex didn’t matter at all; it didn’t make their relationships any less than Sayaka’s with Miyuki. Maybe the fault was on Sayaka’s side. Sayaka counted to five before she detached with Miyuki.
“I…I’m sorry. I got… I got carried away.”
“No, no, Sayaka. That’s not it. It’s my fault after all, right?” Sayaka hated herself for doubting Miyuki’s “sad and concerned” face. Sayaka let Miyuki take her lips for the make-up kiss but couldn’t help but to wonder about what kind of face Miyuki would make behind her back.
***
Sayaka couldn’t sleep. Not after that, and definitely not next to Miyuki.
Miyuki, though, slept soundly. Sayaka stroked Miyuki’s cheeks, gently enough so she wouldn’t wake her up. If only she was peaceful like this all the time. I sound like a psychopathic killer, don’t I? Sayaka chuckled. She thought her chuckle sounded rather like air escaping out of a balloon.
Her blouse was wrinkly but she was happy with a relatively clean pair of clothes. After a good look at Miyuki’s face (as if she was capable of forgetting that face), Sayaka left.
Sayaka walked slowly. Even though she did that, the subway station was way too close and so she got there in less than ten minutes. Pity, she thought, I wanted to walk for a little bit more. She climbed down the stairs and walk through the gate extremely slowly, but nobody was giving her the look due to the fact that everybody else was either practically sleeping or drunk. Sayaka stepped into the train.
A sleeping girl caught Sayaka’s eyes. She didn’t like that she so naturally looked at somebody else other than Miyuki with such desiring eyes, but Miyuki started with physical attraction too, so she couldn’t say too much against it. The sleeping girl was almost as beautiful as sleeping Miyuki—almost, though. She’s not quite on par with Miyuki, Sayaka thought. Sayaka sat next to her.
If it was this girl instead of Miyuki she met that day, would her life be different? Probably, but only because this girl and Sayaka wouldn’t have become anything like Miyuki and Sayaka. Sayaka shut her eyes; her muscles were screaming and her central nervous system threatened to shut down if she didn’t shut down herself. She fell asleep like that.
***
Sayaka felt a careful pat on her shoulder and flung open her eyes. The girl stood before her.
“Um, this is the last station…” Sayaka realized it before she even heard it. Not knowing whether to frown or to smile, she first decided to get off the train that was about to leave the station.
“Did you miss your station?” the girl asked, walking along with Sayaka.
“Yeah, I was supposed to get off at three stations ago. I guess I’ll catch a cab or something.” The girl was interested in Sayaka, no doubt. Sayaka just didn’t want more complication in life by dragging this girl in.
“No, no, don’t do that. Since it’s weekend and what-not, why don’t you stay at my hotel? I’ll give it to you cheap.”
“Really? You can do that?” Was it a pickup line or soliciting? Either way, Sayaka didn’t care. She was tired and didn’t want to pay crazy taxi fare. She can think about her life later, when she had time.
“Yeah! I mean, the rooms are nowhere near full right now. You know, nobody’s on vacation in mid-September. “ Sayaka smiled to her. Cheerfully, the girl started climbing the stairs.
Though the stores’ lights were on, none of them were open. The street gave off the kind of peacefulness Sayaka haven’t felt in a while.
“Didn’t catch your name,” Sayaka asked.
“Rena. Matsui Rena,” turning to look at Sayaka, Rena said, and then smiled. Miyuki used to smile like that, Sayaka thought. Now I can’t tell if her smile is for real or not.
“Yamamoto Sayaka. Good to meet you.”
Other than the occasional car passing by or a flickering light bulb about to die, the street was almost completely silent, which made Sayaka think. She didn’t want to but couldn’t help it; it was like how Sayaka’s feeling towards Miyuki was involuntary.
Was she allowed to do this? Even though this isn’t romantic or anything, isn’t it double standards? Or was she just being a timid loser? Would she even care? In fact, did Miyuki even love her back? Or was she worth everything even when she didn’t love Sayaka back? If Sayaka wanted to change her, would she remain as the same Miyuki she loved? How’d she think of it when it was Sayaka that changed like Miyuki, not vice versa? Questions sprang to her head, the ones that she could never answer. When she came off her daze, she was already in front of the building.
The building wasn’t huge, but it certainly wasn’t little. At about ten stories, it was probably a solid business—and probably run by the Matsuis, not just her.
“Welcome to the Hotel Washington,” Rena smiled. The woman at the reception desk nodded and gave Rena a card key automatically. Easiest check-in of her life.
“Washington? Like George Washington?”
“After the state actually. When we were revamping the place, we renamed it. My dad wanted to name it Hotel California but I said it was way creepy, so he had to settle with Washington.”
“So I can checkout anytime I like but I can ever leave?” Sayaka joked as she got on the elevator.
“Don’t say that!” Rena broke into a laughter. Sayaka shut her eyes as if to enjoy the sound of it. The elevator dinged.
The hallway’s red carpet felt cheap under the soles of her flats, but the night’s stay was free (Sayaka assumed), and besides, she wasn’t sleeping in the corridor, so why did she care?
Rena opened the door that looked a bit massive for a girl like Rena. The room was just like the building; not too huge but certainly not little. Sayaka collapsed on to the bed and smiled satisfactorily. Rena had on a complicated face as she looked out the window, which gave a reasonably good view of the city. Sayaka sat back and just watched her. The girl was nothing like Miyuki but certainly (admittedly for Sayaka) as beautiful as her. Sayaka took a moment to appreciate the surplus of beautiful people in her life.
What went so wrong? Why did Miyuki need other lovers in her life? Looking at Rena somehow seemed like it would give solution to those kind of questions. Rena stood there so still that Sayaka started wondering if Rena was a statue. Even though she was not, she might have been something like that.
“Well, then, I’ll take my leave,” she said after a long, long pause.
“Wait,” Sayaka pleaded. Sitting up, she looked up at Rena with watery eyes. “Don’t go.” Rena beamed back at Sayaka.
“I won’t,” Rena promised. The two collapsed on to the bed.
***
“You’re up,” Rena noted, beaming into Sayaka’s eyes. Sayaka looked back at her reluctantly. “What’s wrong?”
Sayaka sat up on the bed. Rena followed suit. “I… I messed up. G— I— Ugh! OK, let’s think about this…” Sayaka closed her eyes, clutching her head. First things first, she stood and reached for her underwear.
“You can tell me, right?” Sayaka knew those eyes. She had the same pair, actually. Sayaka wanted to cry. It was probably quite a sight if someone else got to look at it—a half-naked girl who wants to cry looking back at a fully naked girl who was about to cry. What would Miyuki say to that?
“I…” Sayaka sighed. “I’m already dating somebody else, and it’s not—“
“I don’t care about that.”
“No, but—“
“I can wait.” Now Sayaka really wanted to cry. Of course, it was probably the worst possible time for her to cry, and besides, it was difficult to cry when most of your skin was exposed to the air.
Sayaka had to think now. Did she regret acting recklessly? No, not really. What she regretted was breaking the promise with herself. I will not inflict the same kind of pain upon Miyuki, she once said to herself. Even though she technically wasn’t (and likely would not be) hurt from Sayaka cheating on her, Sayaka still felt that she can no longer criticize Miyuki for sleeping with everybody.
You know what? I don’t care, Sayaka concluded. If she felt that she loved Rena more then she’ll choose Rena over Miyuki. If it’s the other way around, she’ll choose the other option. Sayaka thought she was starting to understand Miyuki; she went through all those guys and gals, but never found one that was better than Sayaka. It was fucked up, but it was a nice thought. Sayaka felt herself slowly becoming like Miyuki.
“OK. What do you want for breakfast?”
***
“Miyuki,” Sayaka said over the phone.
“Yeah?” Miyuki replied through the speaker.
“We have to talk.”
“We’re talking right now, aren’t we?”
“I don’t think I can say it over the phone.”
“I know, I know. Time and place?”
“Right now, right here,” Miyuki turned to find Sayaka standing in the lobby of Miyuki’s apartment. It wasn’t all marbles and bells and whistles, but it was a decently clean looking place. Enough to break up, at least, thought Sayaka.
“You scared me,” Miyuki said, putting her phone away.
“I’m sorry about that.”
“You sound a bit drier today,” crafty, insidious, or sly—whatever word you could think of to describe Miyuki, she was more than that. Sayaka couldn’t get rid of the feeling that Miyuki was reading her mind.
“I might have a good reason to.”
“Oh? And what would that be?”
“I… I’ve been cheating on you.”
“Really?” Miyuki still wasn’t serious, and Sayaka didn’t know whether to be happy or sad. “You call that ‘good’ reason? For how long?”
“For about three months.”
“That long?” Miyuki frowned. Sayaka saw that she was genuinely unpleasant. Sayaka hesitated to say the next sentence.
“And… and I’m going to have to break up with you,” Sayaka said anyways.
“What?” Miyuki apparently sensed that Sayaka meant business; she was here to break up with her no matter what she would say.
“I’m… I’m tired of trying to convince myself that you still love me, and she—Rena—she treats me like a living person, not a maggot. She loves me for what I am, and I love her for what she is. That has never existed between us, did it?”
“What— How—“ Miyuki paused, biting her lower lip and thinking. “Sayaka, I… I love you too, I just…”
“No. No, you don’t. If you were still in love with me you would have called me at least once when I didn’t call you for 24 days. You should have. You just found a partner that was as good as me in bed and didn’t need me anymore. I—I just… I really want to slap you right now but I can’t, because I’m still in love with you and that’s the fucking part I hate!” Sayaka took a deep breath. “There’re—I… I just realized that I can’t dedicate my everything to you, and I’ve found somebody that will love me even when I’m half-assed about her. I’m sorry that I’m a loser, but I can’t do that. I’m not a saint. I’m sorry I couldn’t…” Sayaka couldn’t speak anymore, thanks to a lump in her throat. A stream of tear managed to escape her eye as she swallowed hard. Miyuki stared at her, not quite comprehending the situation yet.
“Sayaka, no, I can—” Miyuki’s eyes were visibly watery now.
“I just wanted some love back! Call me when I’m gone for weeks, try to hide your sex partners’ shoes, say the food is good even though it sucks, go out to movies time to time…. Was that so difficult for you? Everything else that other people do? Like, was I asking for too much?” Tears streamed down Sayaka’s reddened face. “Did you ever say that you loved me when we weren’t fighting or having sex? No, not once. Miyuki, I…” she wiped her tears. “I’m tired. I don’t think I can go on. I just… Right now, I’m sick of all frustration. I’d thought that with you, I didn’t need a home to return to, that I’m fine, that I can stand it, that I can take everything you do to me but no, I do—I do need a home, someone that’s going to heal me. You know, we—we were never compatible to start with. When we started, I was too full of myself and didn’t realize that. So… So… Sorry to cause you trouble. Take care. I mean it,” Sayaka spat out all the things she needed to. She turned and started to run, only to be stopped by Miyuki.
“Don’t go!” Miyuki pleaded. “Don’t… go… Sayaka…”
Sayaka didn’t turn. She was too afraid to. Instead, she grabbed Miyuki’s hand, feeling her warmth—only to shake it off. She started walking again and this time Miyuki didn’t clutch on.
-
This is the last entry! Voting period will start tomorrow :peace: We'll be sure to make a post to remind you all the details!
Entry #49
Title: What if...
Main Character(s)/Pairing(s): Kasai Tomomi, Itano Tomomi, Shinoda Mariko; TomoTomo
Word Count: 2589
What if...
Itano puffed out a pretty circle of smoke as she removed the cigarette from her mouth; it had been a while since she last smoked but the pressure from the overwhelming workload was slowly suffocating her to a point that she was about to snap. To Itano, the best way to give her exhausted body a break was a puff from the cigarettes that she had desperately been trying to not touch.
She sighed, pushing up her spectacles and looked at the clock on the wall opposite her; 1:30AM it reads, late enough, Itano mused. Standing up, the girl tidied her table before stuffing a few documents into her briefcase and walked out of the office, hoping that whatever she prepared over the past few nights would be enough to help her secure the business the next day.
“Sometime I wish I didn’t have to inherit this big a company,” Itano mumbled, hopping into her convertible as the engines roared to life. Stepping on the accelerator, she sped home whilst enjoying the cooling midnight breeze caressing her face.
“Sometime I wish I’d have time for myself…”
-
Pushing up her black-rimmed spectacles as she stood up, giving the Director of the other company a firm handshake, Itano smiled as she watched him walked out of the conference room. Another successful acquisition, another closed case; Itano heaved a sigh of relief seeing that her hard-work over the past few nights had pulled off. Just as she was packing up the documents and signed contract, a knock on the door interrupted her.
“Itano-san, your new personal assistant is waiting at your office,” her secretary informed as Itano dismissed with a nod. Why on earth did she arrange for her new assistant to start work today, Itano had no idea; she was too exhausted after the presentation to go through all the drills with her new assistant but she knew she had to.
Being extremely particular about a lot of stuffs, Itano’s personal assistants never lasted for more than a month or two; her picky nature made her seemed hard to work with but Itano always argued that if only those assistants had put more heart into helping her, it won’t be that difficult to stay in the job. Moreover, Itano liked to point out, she paid them really well and it was only right for them to put up with her demands and practices.
-
“You must be Itano-san! I’m Kasai Tomomi and I’m your new assistant!” a sweet voice rang out as she opened the door to her office even before she stepped foot inside. The bright smile on the other girl’s face seemed to be glaring sunlight and Itano couldn’t help but squint her eyes as she tried to look at the new and very energetic, assistant.
Buttoned-down light pink blouse coupled with a pleated sky-blue skirt, topping off with a black blazer thrown over the get-up, completed with fanciful high heels; it seemed a little too much for Itano, whose wardrobe consisted of black, grey and surprise? White.
Taking a seat, Itano gestured to the empty chair opposite hers, “Take a seat too.” The other girl, whom Itano noticed was rather bouncy, stared at Itano as she sat down. She didn’t look as hard to handle as what the interviewers warned her to be, Tomomi thought to herself. “Well, I believed the rest had already told you how hard it will be to work with me. I guess, I’m rather picky, but I hope we’ll work well together,” Itano started, taking out a file from the drawers beside her table. “I’ve saved us some trouble,” she passed the file across the table to Tomomi, “and prepared the instructions for you as well as everything you need to know about working with me.”
“Now if you would excuse me,” Itano said, standing up from her seat and walking towards the door, “I’d like to take my leave. Just spend the rest of the day reading this or do anything.”
Unknown to the both of them, Itano’s worn out heart gave a slight flutter.
-
“So, how’s the new assistant? Did you scare her off on her first day?” Mariko teased her best friend as she tipped the glass on her mouth, letting the cold champagne slid down her throat. Itano glared at the older girl before shaking her head.
“I didn’t even talk to her much,” she laughed, “I just passed her a file with all the instructions in it and left.”
“You did what?” Mariko chuckled. “I hope that you didn’t think the file won’t scare her off!”
Itano shot Mariko another glare and sighed. “You know, I really hope she’ll stay…”
Mariko turned and looked at her best friend, interest igniting within her from the tinge of melancholy that lingered from Itano’s mutter. The older girl nodded, standing up as she gave Itano’s head a light pat, “Let’s go. We’ve work tomorrow.”
-
“Coffee~” Tomomi’s bright voice rang in the office as she placed a cup of coffee on Itano’s desk. Her usual white coffee mug had magically transformed into this pink flowery mug that Itano felt her insides turned just by looking at it. Raising her eyebrows at her cheery assistant, she felt all her scolding died on the tip of her tongue and decided to let this go for once. “And……” Tomomi grinned, taking up a prettily wrapped bento box from behind her, “breakfast!” the girl said happily, placing the box on Itano’s desk.
“I’ll be outside if you need me,” Tomomi chirped, turning around and left the room though not without one last blinding smile. Itano looked bewildered at the bento in front of her; not only did the thick file of instructions not scare off the new girl, she was given a bonus?
A bonus in the form of a very optimistic, absolutely adorable and everything that Itano wasn’t, kind of assistant.
Rubbing the back of her head unconsciously, Itano unwrapped the bento; prettily-shaped sandwiches that looked like they took hours to cut into, each with a different filling. A smile tiptoed its way onto Itano’s face as she picked up the note stuck on the underside of the bento cover.
The file didn’t tell me what’s your favorite filling for sandwiches, so I tried to make a few. I hope at least one is to your liking. Good morning!
-
Tomomi heaved a sigh of relief as she stepped out of the office; she was prepared to work with a difficult boss but this one was a bigger handful than she thought it would be. She spent the last night going through the file given to her, memorizing almost everything in it and hoping that she wouldn’t step on Itano’s toes on her second day of work.
How’s the monster boss of yours? – Sae-chan
I’m surviving! Good morning Sae-chan! – Tomo-mi
Good morning too. Have an amazing day at work! You can do it! – Sae-chan
Before Tomomi could send a reply, a cough interrupted her and raising her head, she came faced with her monster boss. Obviously not looking pleased, Itano gestured to Tomomi into her office. Hastily, Tomomi grabbed her notepad and slipped her phone into her pocket, following meekly behind Itano into the office.
-
“Thank you for the breakfast,” Itano started when she heard the door clicked shut. Passing Tomomi the emptied box, Itano asked for her schedule for the day; Tomomi tried to juggle both the box and her notepad, all while taking her phone out from her coat’s pocket and reciting the day’s schedule to Itano.
Amused, Itano bit the side of her lips to stop herself from smiling at Tomomi’s struggles. Watching the younger girl, Itano felt herself getting lost in her voice and gradually, everything just faded out and all she could focus on what how adorable Tomomi was. Tomomi felt eyes on her and her voice trailed away under Itano’s intense gaze when she finished reporting about the day’s schedule.
Itano stood up and walked towards her; Tomomi took a step back and let out a soft whimper, squeezing her eyes shut as she watched Itano raised her hand. Itano looked at Tomomi’s frightened expression and let loose a loop-sided grin while giving the younger girl a light pat on her head.
“Thank you,” came the breezy reply as Itano stepped out of the office, away from a confused Tomomi.
-
Very quickly, Tomomi came to know more about the Itano that she worked for; a workaholic who would not accept a piece of work that is anything less than perfect, an icy woman who finds perverse joy in teasing Tomomi to no end, a scary boss who would not hesitate to fire any workers who tried to take shortcuts in their work and though it scared Tomomi…
A girl that she found herself falling in love with…
-
“Tomo~chin~~wake up,” Tomomi coaxed the sleeping body on the huge bed, tugging the pillow away from the sleeping girl as a final attempt to wake up the sleepy-head.
“Tomoc-ooooaf!” A blink of eye later, Tomomi felt arms around her body as she was pulled onto the bed, used as a substitute pillow by her boss. Before she could protest, her head spun; light snoring on the left side of her face as warm breath caressed her soft skin, it was the closest she had ever been with Tomochin.
Tomochin; the nickname that Tomomi used with Itano whenever they are alone.
It became part of Tomomi’s job to wake the boss up and cook breakfast every morning at her place; not that she really minded it, but morning like these when Itano refused to get off the bed were quite a handful to handle.
And it was especially hard today when Tomochin pulled Tomomi onto the bed with her…
-
Itano grinned against Tomomi’s soft skin; she liked cuddling with Tomomi whenever she could though she didn’t show it. She knew that she had some time to spare today and decided to play a little prank on her trusty assistant, pulling her down onto her bed and using her as the pillow.
Closing her eyes, she thought back about the chat she had with Mariko a few nights ago…
-
“You know something,” Mariko mused, taking a sip from her wine glass. Itano looked up from her own glass and looked at the glint in her friend’s eyes and waited. “You’ve changed…”
“The Tomochin that I knew is coming back, and the Tomochin that we’ve all grown accustomed to…she is slowly leaving,” the older girl pondered, looking intently at her best friend. “Not that I’m complaining,” she added, “I like the old Tomochin better.”
Itano swirled her champagne in the glass and slowly nodded; she noticed the change herself as well and that somewhat scared her. The walls around her heart that she had been building over the past years were slowly starting to crumble down with every new day she spent with Tomomi; that clear and crisp laughter, that bright and blinding smile, that sweet and whiney voice and that serious and earnest attitude towards work…that irresistible girl, Kasai Tomomi.
This certain Kasai Tomomi worked better than cigarettes in relieving the pressure on Itano’s shoulders, in waking Itano up in the midst of the long nights where she needed to rush through proposals and Itano didn’t know if Tomomi caught wind of it, but she was slowly thawing her frozen heart, making it beat once again…
“Maybe it’s time for you to put down your burdens and man up,” Mariko’s voice interrupted Itano’s thoughts, “before you know,” she paused, “…before you lose someone important.”
-
“Tomo~chin,” the whiney and irresistible voice sliced through the silence, tugging on the sleeping girl’s blankets once again. A routine almost every morning, Tomomi sighed. “If only there’s an easier way to wake you up,” the younger girl started, watching as Itano slowly peeled an eye open and grinned at her.
“There is,” the sleepy girl offered, puckering her lips. A light smack on Itano’s face later, Tomomi climbed off the bed, puffing her cheeks in mock irritation. “Hey, I was offering you an easier way of getting me out of the bed,” Itano complained, rubbing her face.
Tomomi suppressed a smile, blowing the strand of stray hair off her hair in mock annoyance, “But Tomo isn’t an easy girl!”
Itano stared at the cute girl; hand sneaking up to hold onto Tomomi’s and gently pulled her back onto the bed. “Tomochin isn’t an easy girl too,” the older girl muttered. Tomomi raised an eyebrow in surprise; it was Tomochin’s first, addressing herself in third person like how Tomomi liked to. Snaking an arm around Tomomi’s waist, the older girl pulled Tomomi closer to herself.
“What if Tomochin tells Tomomi that she fell in love with someone?”
-
“What if Tomochin tells Tomomi that she fell in love with someone?”
Tomomi felt her body stiffened up when she heard Tomochin asked the question, breath hitched in her throat. Turning her head slightly away from the other girl, Tomomi tried her best to keep her tears from falling; she knew that they aren’t exactly a couple but in Tomomi’s heart, she had long regarded them as something more than friends, and to deal with Tomochin falling in love with someone else was too much for Tomomi.
The arm around her waist tightened its hold on her as the other came up to her face and turned her head around to face the other girl. “What if…” Tomomi could hear Tomochin whispered, face dangerously close to her own, eyes sparkling with a mischievous yet uncertain glint.
“Tomochin fell in love with Tomomi?”
-
Tomomi bit down on her lips, nearly hard enough to draw blood, checking if she was dreaming while Tomochin gave a hearty laugh, patting Tomomi’s head and using her finger to poke on Tomomi’s lips, giving it a light fleeting caress on the spot that Tomomi bit on.
“Tomochin…really likes Tomomi but she’s too shy to let Tomomi knows because she’s afraid that Tomomi didn’t feel the same,” the older girl muttered, fingers playing with Tomomi’s shyly. “When Tomochin knows that she’s starting to fall in love with Tomomi, she was frightened but also excited. Tomomi, in her own absolutely adorable way, starts to win Tomochin’s heart over even before Tomomi know it herself…” lowering her eyes, Tomochin continued.
“Tomochin is now at Tomomi’s mercy…”
Tomomi pressed her lips together, taking in all that Tomochin had said and the pair remained in each other’s arms in silence for the next minute or so. Slowly, Tomomi noticed the air of confident around Tomochin started to waver as time passed and the sparkle in her eyes starting to dull as Tomochin grew increasingly worried.
Planting a chaste kiss on Tomochin’s lips, Tomomi grinned. Watching the other girl’s eyes thinned into a line, forming a pretty eye-smile, Tomochin smiled.
“What if Tomomi says that she had fallen in love with Tomochin too?”
-
It's Time to Vote! The Voting Period will Run from October 4 to October 15.
Hi there! We managed to receive a staggering amount of 49 submissions to our Fall 2012 Contest48! That is more than twice the amount of entries that we received last time, and we couldn’t be more grateful. Thank you so much to the authors!
Now, readers, have you been keeping up? It’s time for you to participate as well and enter to win some prizes of your own.
Here is a quick list of links that will (hopefully) help out all of our voters!
- On Voting (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/31274921706/contest48-on-voting-fall-2012)
- Fanfic List (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.0)
- Voter’s Prize - 2 AKB/SKE TRADING CARDS |OR| YOUR CHOICE OF 1 PICTURE FROM THESE (http://s1244.photobucket.com/albums/gg564/contest48/?start=all)
- Submit your votes! Either via pm in this forum or our submit option in tumblr (http://contest48.tumblr.com/submit)
Furthermore, we remind you that every author who submits an entry must also submit a vote during the designated voting period. The vote cannot be for your own entry/entries.
We will be keeping careful track of this and we will not be sending out personal reminders or messages to our authors. Please take the time to encourage the other participants and become involved.
So, how easy is it to vote? We’ve tried our best to keep it simple. We’re literally bribing you to have an opinion, so please send in your votes and encourage your friends to as well!
Confused about anything? Feel free to message us with your question(s), or ask in this thread, and we’ll do our best to get back to you promptly!
Thank you all, and happy voting!
-
Thanks for Voting!
The voting period is now over.
Everyone had a week and a half to submit their votes, so we are now no longer accepting votes. Thanks to everyone who sent in a vote!
We’ll have the numbers sorted out soon. We should announce the entries that made it past the first round by this Friday, and the final winners - with comments from the judges - sometime next week.
Again, thank you for your interest in our contest! You’ll hear from us soon!
-
Final Results
Better late than never!
✣ First Place ✣
“And Darling” (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1099741#msg1099741) / Entry #33 (written by kid-alpha (http://kid-alpha.tumblr.com/))
See: First Place Winner (Opinions of the Judges) (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/34619937500/first-place-winner-opinions-of-the-judges)
✣ Second Place ✣
“Nakeru Basho” (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1094171#msg1094171) / Entry #28 (written by choshi-chii (http://choshi-chii.tumblr.com))
✣ Special Prizes ✣
| Entry #2 - The Quick Shot (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1094171#msg1094171) |
| Entry #6 - A Maiden’s First Love (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1094967#msg1094967) |
| Entry #24 - we have not touched the stars (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1098304#msg1098304) |
| Entry #27 - One Bullet (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1098686#msg1098686) |
| Entry #31 - Wordless (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1099395#msg1099395) |
| Entry #34 - By the Rooftop (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1100010#msg1100010) |
| Entry #35 - That 1830m (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1100138#msg1100138) |
| Entry #37 - A Guide to Marine Life (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=33840.msg1100761#msg1100761) |
✣ Voter's Prizes ✣
kiri-el
rabiscandoecriando
sara-chan-otaku-fangirl
paupauri
swiftease
harleymar
Don't forget to check readers' comments on our entries!
#1-8 (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/33782837565/voters-comments-on-entries-2-4-8) ✣ #9-16 (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/33810419709/voters-comments-on-entries-10-13-15-16) ✣ #17-24 (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/33839548469/voters-comments-on-entries-18-19-21-23-24) ✣ #18-39 (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/33848956638/voters-comments-on-entries-27-28-31-33-39) ✣ #40-49 (http://contest48.tumblr.com/post/33900895958/voters-comments-on-entries-43-46-49)
First off, thank you to everyone for all of your patience. We are late (specially here, in the forum) - we acknowledge this and we apologize. Furthermore, thank you for all of your patience throughout this entire Fall 2012 Contest48. We’ve had a few bumps in the road - less than last time - but we still haven’t perfected it yet. Thank you all for your advice and suggestions so far : )
A specific thank you to all the authors and readers who participated. We hope that everyone will remain active and that the authors, specifically, continue to polish their skills in preparation for the next Contest48. It’s unfortunate that not everyone can receive a prize, but please continue to try your best! We were really excited by the amount of interest we gathered this time around. Hopefully we can get together even more photos next time and continue to grow!
Lastly, our decisions are not up for debate. Thank you for respecting our choices and for being so encouraging all along! Prizes will be sent as soon we have everyone's info, and we'll announce when they are sent out
Important! Due to this forum's new rules (http://forum.jphip.com/index.php?topic=29813.msg1111412#msg1111412) we'll have to revise and maybe delete some of the fanfics in this thread. In case we need to delete a certain story, its link in the first post will be replaced with a link to that same entry in our site