JPHiP Forum
The Hello! Project Fanfics => H!P Fanfics => Topic started by: goosefish on October 02, 2006, 03:48:25 PM
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A big hello to everyone here! I signed up quite a while ago but never ended up really posting anything. I just found that I had some time recently, so I thought I should start being a more active member here, seeing as it seems like a great place to be! And what better way to start than posting a fic? So before I ramble on too much and embarrass myself, here's the first chapter!
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Chapter 1
I don’t think that meeting your idol is all that people make it out to be. You dream about that sort thing, you have fantasies about that sort of thing. But when it really happens, what then?
The day I asked her to do Futarigoto with me she gave me a funny look. Was I being too bold? Surely in her position she had better things to do - idols are busy people. She cocked her head to the side like a parrot for a moment, and I thought I would die from how cute she looked.
“Tanaka-chan,” she plainly looked at me, eyes piercing through mine. I thought my life was over. She was rejecting me and I felt like dying on the spot from pure embarrassment and shame.
“I’d love to,” was all she said with that smile of hers before going back into the dance studio.
The time we spent together for Futarigoto was something I could never forget. Sure, we were being watched by a crowd of people who obviously had never seen two girls having a good time before, but I saw another side of the elusive idol who I respected so much. Though some of the topics we discussed were pre-determined by the producers, my respect for her grew even more from the things she said.
That night, she took me home. I desperately told her that it was too much trouble for her to be taking a different train just to see me off, but she insisted just as desperately, saying that it was her “duty as sempai”. When she put it like that, I couldn’t say no. Our footsteps echoed along the road as we walked in an awkward, deafening silence. My mind was racing to find something to say – anything would do. I’m sure she felt the same. Incapable of doing so, and probably in absolute stupidity, I placed my hand in hers, and by instinct our fingers entwined.
Her steps faltered for half a second before resuming. Was I being too bold again? It was a perfectly normal thing for us to hold hands, wasn’t it? Everyone does it all the time. I’m sure it wasn’t the first time she’s held hands with another girl. The entire situation was completely normal.
I doubted myself. If it was so normal, then why could I feel so much heat in my cheeks? If it was so normal, then why were we both staring at the footpath, as if trying to burn holes into the ground?
When we reached the front of the complex I turned to thank her, but she walked straight into the building, gently tugging me along.
“Um…you really didn’t have to…I mean…Goto-san…” I really didn’t know what I was trying to say, so I tried again while she curiously looked at me.
“I’m sorry about…you went to all this trouble…” I trailed off as I struggled to make sense, and continued to stare at the ‘emergency stop’ button as the lift climbed to my floor. She gave my hand a quick squeeze that instantly brought a lump to my throat.
“Tanaka-chan, it’s ok. I just want to make sure you get back safely. I’m just sending you home,’ she softly smiled at me with that smile of hers that made me smile back. But what she said hung in the air and rang in my ears.
Back then, I couldn’t understand why what she said had left me feeling unsettled. I couldn’t understand why I suddenly felt lonely when she let go of my hand at the doorstep. I couldn’t understand why she looked like she had something important to say but was holding back. I couldn’t understand.
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“Oi, Tanakacchi?” Risa is waving her hand back and forth in front of my eyes. I blink at her. She keeps waving. I blink again. She frowns at me for a moment, and before I could blink a third time she flicks me with all her might, hitting the centre of my forehead.
“Hey that hurt!! What’s wrong with you, Gaki-san?!” I yell at her as I vigorously rub my head, trying to ease the pain. All Risa can do is laugh until she has tears rolling down her cheeks. After a moment, I can’t help but laugh along with her. This girl’s laughter is too contagious.
“What were you thinking about?” she asks after we calm down. She seems genuinely concerned. Recently, she had been taking her role as sempai quite seriously, especially when it came to Koharu-chan and I.
“I don’t know, I just zoned out I guess,” I blatantly lie to her, silently asking for her forgiveness. I can’t really tell her that I was wondering what that night two years ago with Maki had really meant to both of us. She looks at me suspiciously, but then decides to let it slide. Both of us had arrived early for kick-base practice and were waiting for the others to get here.
Eventually everyone appears one by one, and practice gets underway. I don’t know why Tsunku put us on the team. Wait, scrap that. I don’t know why Tsunku even created this team. Everyone’s athletic ability is all over the place, and the coach seems like he wants to strangle us half the time. I roll my eyes at myself. There’s no point in thinking about it now, because I should be concentrating on training.
Standing on 3rd base isn’t very exciting; it’s some time before someone actually makes it here. That someone is Koharu-chan. She grins like a goofball at me and I laugh at her. Ever since she joined Morning Musume she’s taken a liking to me. I don’t know why though. The sun’s heat beating down on us makes me feel like the entire world is moving like a giant slug.
After some time the game rolls at a faster pace. I feel the sweat running down the side of my face, but there’s no time to wipe it away. Yui had just stomped past 2nd base, kicking up dirt like a buffalo, and is headed straight for me, limbs flailing like a wild caveman. Ai-chan calls out to me as she throws me the ball. Suddenly, something catches my eye in the stands. I stupidly turn my head to see what it is. The grounds should be deserted because this is a private training session.
It’s Maki. Maki is in the stands. She’s watching me. How long has she been there for? I panic, but I can’t tear my eyes away from her.
All of a sudden something crashes into me. My neck jolts from the impact and I’m knocked to the ground with a heavy mass landing on top of me. I can hear yelling and hands patting my cheeks. Groaning as I open my eyes, I see Yui rolling off of me and frantically apologising for bowling me over.
“Garghhf…” I manage to say something unintelligible, and everyone sighs in relief. My neck and spine already begin to feel sore and twisted. After all the fuss, which included making sure I wasn’t seriously injured, Coach told me to call it a day. I head to the change room and plan on just lying on a bench for a while before leaving, because I don’t want to pass out on the way home.
Reaching the change rooms I let out a big sigh. The thought of Maki’s presence is bothering me more than my mangled body is.
“Are you hurt much?” Maki’s voice startles me. She’s sitting on a bench. Was she waiting for me? I freeze and swallow the lump in my throat. Time around us stops as we stare at each other, taking in each others presence as the atmosphere dampens. I can only pray that I’m ready to withstand her presence here…
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uoah, first to comment here? XD
I have to say that I love it. The way you describe Reina's thoughts, how she feel ashamed and nervous when Maki's arround... just awesome.
I'll be looking forward fore more of this, count on it ;)
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"Yui had just stomped past 2nd base, kicking up dirt like a buffalo, and is headed straight for me, limbs flailing like a wild caveman."
Bwa ha, that had me actually laughing out loud <333 I love the characterisation of Reina, and your writing style is fantastic. Looking forward to seeing more!
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yopla goosefish ! i like what you wrote ! i think it's the first time that i don't read a badgirl Reina haha...
I don’t know why Tsunku even created this team. [...] the coach seems like he wants to strangle us half the time[..]
Standing on 3rd base isn’t very exciting; it’s some time before someone actually makes it here.
:ROTFLMAO:
Maki+Reina ? mmmm interesting...i'm in position ! to check this one too
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Poor Rabbits, they suck so much... But entirely Maki/Reina? Yay! I could never write them myself, but this is such a great start for you. Keep going!
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Oh. I'll be watching this one for sure. I always liked the idea of a Reina/Maki story and now you've created a perfect one. Keep going!
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Writing in Reina's perspective is a tough job but you were able to pull it out masterfully. :D:thumbsup
Those stuff about Gatas were really hilarious. :lol:
Looking forward to the next chapters.
And before I forget, welcome goosefish!!! :)
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*stumbles in*
Wow, I'm gone for only a day and there's already a response! A big THANKYOU to every one who has taken the time to read and comment because it is really encouraging and keeps me going! ^.^ I'll post the next chapter in another post because I think it would be cleaner and easier to get to if I keep my replies and actual chapters separate.
uoah, first to comment here? XD
I have to say that I love it. The way you describe Reina's thoughts, how she feel ashamed and nervous when Maki's arround... just awesome.
I'll be looking forward fore more of this, count on it ;)
Woot! Reina's train of though sometimes troubles me though, as I'm not quite sure if I'm going in the right direction. Hehe. I've skimmed through your fic but haven't commented yet. I'll do so when I can sit down and read it more thouroughly (probably after I post my next chapter.)
Bwa ha, that had me actually laughing out loud <333 I love the characterisation of Reina, and your writing style is fantastic. Looking forward to seeing more!
Haha, glad I could make you laugh! Thanks for the support on my writing style.
yopla goosefish ! i like what you wrote ! i think it's the first time that i don't read a badgirl Reina haha...
Maki+Reina ? mmmm interesting...i'm in position ! to check this one too
I was initially going to put some traditional yankee Reina in there but I thought to myself "Nah, there's gotta be something else underneath the badgirl". Hehe, it is quite tempting though.
Poor Rabbits, they suck so much... But entirely Maki/Reina? Yay! I could never write them myself, but this is such a great start for you. Keep going!
Lols, I thought it would be pretty hard to do entirely Maki/Reina too. I've had the idea of them floating around since early this year though so I thought I should do something about it.
Oh. I'll be watching this one for sure. I always liked the idea of a Reina/Maki story and now you've created a perfect one. Keep going!
Yeah, I love the idea of the two of them together too. When I first saw their Futarigoto I couldn't help thinking that they looked too cute together. Even so, they seemed a tad uncomfortable with each other. That's where the ideas for this fic came from.
Writing in Reina's perspective is a tough job but you were able to pull it out masterfully.
Those stuff about Gatas were really hilarious.
Looking forward to the next chapters.
And before I forget, welcome goosefish!!!
Aww, thankyou for the big welcome! And thanks for the encouragement about Reina's perspective. Like I said earlier I'm not really sure and hope that I'm doing ok with it. Letting me know like that is really helpful! :D
Btw...you mean Rabbits, not Gatas, right? Hehe. :P
Once again, thank you to everyone who has commented here, as well as those who have read but haven't commented!
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Chapter 2
“Uh…yeah…I mean, no!” I try to cover it up. I don’t want her to think that I’m weak. She stifles a giggle unsuccessfully.
“Which is it?” she asks. I take a breath so that I can answer her properly. I don’t want her to think that I’m stupid either.
“My neck and back hurt, but I should be fine,” I reply methodically. She gets up and walks to me. Keeping a reasonable distance between us, she looks at me with mysterious eyes.
“Sorry, I distracted you…I didn’t know I would cause so much commotion…” Maki apologises softly, her expression solemn.
What is she really here for? Why on earth would she want to watch kick-base practice? All these questions are starting to give me a headache. For the past two years since Futarigoto we never had much verbal exchange between us. Ok, so it was more like we avoided conversation, and I’m not completely sure why. If left alone we were always tense, always cautious, keeping up formalities such as Goto-san and Tanaka-chan. Though in my mind I refer to certain people by their given names, in person I just can’t bring myself to call them that, and end up going with formalities. Maki is one of those people. There’s no doubt that we could feel something not-so-platonic between us all this time…and now she suddenly shows up to watch me play kick-base, acting like it was a daily routine. It’s too overwhelming for me right now. I head over to sit down on the bench, burying my sweaty face in a towel, trying to make sense of her odd behaviour.
I hear her heels click towards me and feel the light wind as she sits down beside me. Her hand gently touches my shoulder and I flinch unintentionally. I peer at her from behind the towel. She looks a little annoyed and stares intensely at a locker. I feel nauseous. She looks at me and I can tell she wants to say something. I hold my breath.
“You like yakiniku, right?”
“…Excuse me?” I question in disbelief. That’s all she could come up with? Didn’t she have something more important to say to me? Or maybe I want her to say something important to me. I feel a bit disappointed and confused.
“You were injured because of me. I’m really sorry. I feel bad so…let me cook for you tonight?” she explains to me. She feels bad? She should feel bad! Having Yui ram into me at full force felt like having a caravan drive straight into me. I take a breath and tell myself to calm down. It wasn’t Maki’s fault that I just kept…staring at her. I look at Maki, and she’s anxiously waiting for my answer.
“Goto-san, that would be nice,” I reply, forcing myself to smile at her. I can’t believe this is happening. This isn’t normal. Wait a minute, nothing was normal when it comes to Maki and I. But isn’t dinner a little too much? What’s more, it’s at her place. I mentally tell myself to get a grip again. It’s just dinner between friends, isn’t it? There’s nothing to be worried about. All the same, I can’t help but feel a little uneasy. Feeling uncomfortable I stand up and walk to the centre of the room, and she follows me.
Maki draws closer to me until there isn’t any space between us. The air feels thick and heavy with uninvited tension. I stiffen up as she loosely wraps her arms around me. I feel embarrassed about the fact that I’m still sweaty and covered in dirt from practice. What kind of game is she playing?
“I’m sorry again, about this. I’ll come pick you up at seven,” she says without letting go. I can only stand there with my arms by my side, and my heart pumping rapidly. Pick me up? She’s trying to do something completely unnecessary again.
“I can go to your place on my own.”
“It was my fault you got hurt, it’s the least I can do, you know? To make sure you get there safely…”
Déjà vu slaps me upside the head. Images of her walking me to my doorstep that night flash through my mind.
“No, really. I know how to…” I trail off because she tightens her arms around me and lightly rests her head against mine. I feel warm and uncomfortable at the same time. Why is she being so persistent? She’s about to get her way again. Just like that night.
“…Tanaka-chan…” she whispers. Her warm breath tickles my ear, and a chill runs up my spine. It’s over, I lose to her again. I become completely powerless to resist her will. I nod my head in agreement but she holds on a moment longer than necessary.
She steps back and smiles at me. That smile. It’s so sincere and makes me forget my anxieties in an instant. How is she able to do these kinds of things to me?
“I’ll see you then. Take care going home,” she bids me farewell and exits the change rooms. I take a big, deep breath, hold it for a few seconds and then let it go. At least she didn’t offer to take me home on top of escorting me.
I shake my head at both Maki and myself. We both know that our feelings had never disappeared. Our relationship was already warped, in the awkward void between friendship and something more. It never went backwards or forwards. In coming here today, was she trying to drive it in a particular direction? If she wanted this then why did she wait so long? How did I even come to like another girl? Well, I can’t exactly change that now, but it still surprises me how easily I fell for her. The first girl I ever had these kinds of feelings for, would she be the last? All these questions were making my headache worse.
I survive the train ride home, though my entire body is wracking with pain. With a few hours to spare before Maki is due to arrive, I decide to soak in the bath for a while. My headache is still hanging around, and being confused and nervous at the same time isn’t really doing anything to help it. My bones and muscles feel like they’re burning by now, so forcing myself to get out of the tub and into some clothes takes a lot longer than I initially thought. I hope I don’t pass out on Maki.
7 o’clock arrives, and so does Maki, right on time, knocking on my door. I swing the door open and she flashes me a bright smile. At least she’s happy to see me, even if I’m just about ready to collapse. I greet her with a smile too, but she knits her brows at me. Do I really look that bad?
“Are you feeling alright?” she asks, concerned.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Should we go?” I reply in attempt to cover up how horrible I really feel. I wince as I bend down to put on my shoes. She steps into my apartment and closes the door behind her. I look up at her, confused.
“You’re not fine,” she states matter-of-factly, eyes piercing mine.
I must have given her some sort of look without realising it because her expression softens. She sighs as I stand back up. I try not to look like I’m in pain, but I don’t think it works. She takes a step closer to me and places her hands on my shoulders. I flinch a little because they hit the ground quite hard earlier and were still tender. I didn’t mean to let her see that. She looks terrible. I think she must be feeling pretty terrible too. She takes another step closer and wraps me in her arms again. This time I hug her back without hesitation, no longer afraid of showing any weakness.
“I’m really, really sorry,” Maki sadly apologises for the thousandth time today. “You don’t have to go all the way to my place today, you need to rest. I’ll make some dinner with whatever you have here”. I almost cry. And then another thought hits me. I don’t even have any food in my fridge. I tell her this and she says that we can order something.
For some reason, this meeting has lightened up the stiffness between us. I feel like we can speak with a little more freedom.
She tugs my hand, snapping me out of my thoughts. Why is she walking me towards my bed? A frantic internal panic begins. The next moment feels like one drawn out slow-motion blur.
“Goto-san?”
She tells me to lie down on my stomach. What is she thinking? Too confused to protest I comply with her. I don’t even want to think about where this could lead. My head spins and I feel like my stomach has jumped into my throat. She’s straddling me, her knees on either side of my hips. I feel her hands on my back, and before I could question her again, Maki beings gently kneading my back.
The tenseness I had a moment ago immediately disappears. I scold myself for how silly I had been. Sighing as her hands work away some of the pain I had acquired today, I wonder where she learnt to massage like this. I could die happy right now.
My eyes close in relaxation as she works the knots out of my lower back. I’m about to fall asleep when I feel her hands on my butt. My eyes bulge and I jerk my head up off the bed, which is a bad idea because it’s still aching.
“Sorry!” Maki yelps and quickly takes her hands off me. It’s good to see that she can be embarrassed too. “I just thought…your body is sore, isn’t it? If you don’t want me to touch you there I –“
“No it’s fine!” I squeak. I can feel my cheeks burn as soon as I say this. “I mean – just – it - ”
Neither of us are getting anywhere with our explanations. The air becomes awkward between us again. I take a moment and think about how I want to say this.
“I don’t mind at all. I was just surprised because I almost fell asleep. Your massage feels really nice, and I don’t want you to stop”.
There. I said it. It’s the honest truth. I close my eyes and hope she doesn’t get scared by what I just said.
“Are you sure?” she quietly asks. I’ve never seen this shy side of her before, and I think it’s really sweet of her.
“Uhuh,” I respond. We both start to relax again. “I never knew you were so good at this…”
She doesn’t respond and begins at my lower back again. Slowly, her hands drift downwards. She hesitates as she reaches my butt again, and this time I don’t react like before. I admit; it feels so good. Maki doesn’t stop there, kneading my legs and arms too. She even massages my head which sends me reeling because it feels so heavenly. I could get used to this kind of thing. As she massages my entire body I begin to fall asleep again. I let myself drift off.
A sleep induced body twitch wakes me up. I lift my head. Where did Maki go? I squint at the clock. 9.40? How long have I been asleep? I must suck at being a host. I force myself to roll off the bed, despite the aches still plaguing my body. I feel groggy. I bet I look groggy too. Faintly I can hear Maki’s voice at the door. Dragging myself out to the living room, I see that she’s ordered pizza.
She turns around and pauses when she sees me. She looks amused.
“Did you sleep ok?” she asks me as she sets the pizza down. I nod my head, still not completely awake. She walks over to me and combs my hair with her fingers. I probably had bed-hair.
“Thank you. For everything”.
She smiles at me and tells me to sit down. It feels good to be taken care of. The rest of the night flies by as we eat, laugh and chat about anything and everything. It almost feels like we’re best friends who haven’t seen each other for years and years and felt the need to catch up on everything that was missed out on. We speak excitedly, so fast that there isn’t any gap between words, barely taking a breath. It’s refreshing, and for the first time since we met, I feel at ease with her, letting myself go completely unguarded, freely expressing myself.
It isn’t until Maki eventually has to leave that my anxieties come flooding back. It’s like that surreal moment was being torn away from me, and I don’t want it to end. Walking her to the door I thank her again for looking after me.
“Hey Reina-chan, it’s ok to call someone by their first name, right?” did she just call me Reina-chan? What she said didn’t even sound like a question, but more a statement. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to reply. If that’s her way of telling me that I should call her ‘Maki’ then… I mentally shrug and give it a try.
“…Maki…-san?” I say unsurely for the first time. I look at her and she has a silly grin on her face, telling me that it was what she was implying I should do. I grin back and hers grows even wider if possible. In one fluid movement she has me in her arms again, her head bent down to be level with mine. I barely trust myself to wrap my own arms around her waist.
“I’m glad we got to spend some time together. I had a lot of fun, and I hope you did too. I know I’ve apologised already, but I’m sorry for getting you injured. Greasy pizza wasn’t nearly enough to compensate for it…” she trails off, still holding on to me. At this close contact I take note of her perfume – it smells sweet, it’s light, not too strong yet still noticeable.
“We should do this again,” it slips out before I can think over it. What if she doesn’t want to? That possibility is crossed out as soon as I feel her nod against me. All of a sudden I’m aware that the hold we have on each other seems to be going beyond the limits of friendship. What kind of friends refuse to let go even after several minutes have lapsed? This must be setting a new record for how long we’ve shared a hug. It’s as if we thought we would never see one another again, savouring every last second together. What I am thinking? I’m getting too mushy for my own liking. Finally, Maki slowly steps back, her eyes look as bewildered as I feel. What are we doing to ourselves? To each other?
“I should go,” she says quietly, the tone of her voice almost breaks my heart. Moments ago we were all smiles and laughter, and now we were returning from a funeral. Is she thinking of the same things as I am?
“Right, it’s getting late…” I can’t keep my eyes from avoiding hers.
“But we’ll do this again soon, real soon!” she snaps back into a happy-go-lucky character, but it seems so forced. I merely nod, and she frowns a little at me before bending down to give me a kiss on the cheek. It was light, soft, her lips barely touching my cheek, but all the same my heart flutters. I feel my face go slightly pink.
“Ok, let me know when you have time again. We’ll have real food this time, right?” I force myself into that same fake character, matching hers. Why are we covering up? Shouldn’t we be more mature than this? I smile at her and she nods and waves goodbye.
As she opens the door to let herself out, I can’t help but feel like a big idiot. And just like that, I feel insecure again. About myself, about Maki, and about the kind of relationship we have. A familiar pounding begins in my head once again. How long can I stand this before something inside me explodes?
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Yay! I was afraid of it ending when Maki left the locker room but it didn't!! It was long and I was so happy! This is so well written, it really is. Keep on coming with the Reina/Maki goodness!!
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Aww, cute! I'm loving this story, can't wait to see where it goes.
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Wow, I'm gone for only a day and there's already a response!
and sometimes there are battles to see who is going to post first hahaha
'cause it's hard to say something that others haven't posted yet...espacialy when it's a good fanfic like yours :D
when i finished reading, i looked back and i noticed how long your chapter was...i was just..wow...didn't felt the time flying...it was so interesting that i forgot anything else...i was just trying to imagine how confused Reina was, and how her head was going to explose with all those questions...
i second icarianwings with your writing style, i love that too.
we can really feel the atmosphere here...confused...uncomfortable...emotional...and sometimes really funny
"[...] I feel bad so…let me cook for you tonight?”
that sounded like an order XD
She feels bad? She should feel bad! Having Yui ram into me at full force felt like having a caravan drive straight into me. I take a breath and tell myself to calm down. It wasn’t Maki’s fault that I just kept…staring at her.
:ROTFLMAO:
7 o’clock arrives, and so does Maki, right on time, knocking on my door. I swing the door open and she flashes me a bright smile. At least she’s happy to see me, even if I’m just about ready to collapse. I greet her with a smile too, but she knits her brows at me. Do I really look that bad?
:lmao:
I must suck at being a host.
:ROFL
How long can I stand this before something inside me explodes?
i'm really looking forward to see that...so that means : bring us the next chapter :bounce: (please xD)
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That was a sweet chapter, goosefish. I actually haven't seen the Futarigoto yet, but reading your story make me want to check it out. :P
The feeling of being alone with someone you look up to could be really intimidating. There will be always be insecurity but on the bright side, it can also be motivating.
They should definitely do that again. XD
Yeah, I was talking about the Rabbits not Gatas. Thanks for pointing it out. Perhaps I really have to get stoned to death for messing that up :lol::P
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YoukaiChica: hehe, I'm glad you weren't scared off by the length of it!
icarianwings: don't worry, we'll all see where it's going sooner or later! (including myself :P )
ChrNo: I think the response is what I like about this forum. With an entire section dedicated to fanfics it just feels so friendly and open :D . And not to worry, next chapter coming up soon!
wordsworth: Check their Futarigoto out! I think it's on youtube, or parts of it at least.
Btw, would anyone be able to tell me how could change the thread title? I've been trying to work it out, but to no avail. :doh:
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OMG...this is amazing...TanakaxGoto! :thumbsup:
and i think you just edit your first post in order to change thread title...correct me if i'm wrong..
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AHHH! *runs around in circles* "This has just become one of my favourite fics ever. The whole Maki Reina thing....It's just so well written. And the even better thing? IT"S LONG! YAY FOR GOOSEFISH!
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Yay! Another lonewolf-shipping story! Love MakixReina like whoa. I am definately looking forward to the future of your story! Gave me laughs here and there, and the progress is very steady~! Love it! :]
As for titles, unfortunately, until I know the story a little more, I can help you with the title :]. So that's why you should write more! <3
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It’s over, I lose to her again.
Aww, so cute!
BTW, some of your paragraphs seem really long. Like, I love your story and how much you put in one post, but I think you should try and spread it out more. My head started spinning when I looked at the bigger sections.
Other than that, you are amazing! :D
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Thanks for comments again everyone! :D
OMG...this is amazing...TanakaxGoto! :thumbsup:
and i think you just edit your first post in order to change thread title...correct me if i'm wrong..
I tried doing that a few times, but it only changes the title of the first post, rather than the entire thread. :confused: I'm still stumped so if anyone would have any idea, please speak up :)
AHHH! *runs around in circles* "This has just become one of my favourite fics ever. The whole Maki Reina thing....It's just so well written. And the even better thing? IT"S LONG! YAY FOR GOOSEFISH!
Lol, it's long alright. I'm not quite sure how long it's gona get but each chapter seems to get longer and longer. XD
Yay! Another lonewolf-shipping story! Love MakixReina like whoa. I am definately looking forward to the future of your story! Gave me laughs here and there, and the progress is very steady~! Love it! :]
As for titles, unfortunately, until I know the story a little more, I can help you with the title :]. So that's why you should write more! <3
'Lonewolf-shipping story' made me laugh for some reason :lol: . As for the title I have one or two in mind but just don't know how to change the thread title.
Aww, so cute!
BTW, some of your paragraphs seem really long. Like, I love your story and how much you put in one post, but I think you should try and spread it out more. My head started spinning when I looked at the bigger sections.
Other than that, you are amazing! :grin:
Lol, when I first read what you said about the paragraphs I thought 'hm...doesn't look THAT bad, does it?'. That was when I looked at it from my 1024x768 resolution. While using another computer the resolution was 1400x1050 or something. Now that DID hurt my eyesXD. I don't know why, but the different resolutions seemed to make a really big difference. :sweatdrop:
Do you have any suggestions on how should set it out so it doesn't kill the eyes of several people? I think I set my paragraphs out by train of thought...one topic will have one paragraph etc. I don't really know if thats the way to go though. I'm not really sure on how I should go about spreading them out more for fear of disrupting the...uh...train of thought...flow...thing.
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I tried doing that a few times, but it only changes the title of the first post, rather than the entire thread. :confused: I'm still stumped so if anyone would have any idea, please speak up :)
To change the title of the whole thread, you need to PM a Mod or Admin and ask them to do it. More likely than not they'll gladly do it.
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Lol, when I first read what you said about the paragraphs I thought 'hm...doesn't look THAT bad, does it?'. That was when I looked at it from my 1024x768 resolution. While using another computer the resolution was 1400x1050 or something. Now that DID hurt my eyesXD. I don't know why, but the different resolutions seemed to make a really big difference. :sweatdrop:
Do you have any suggestions on how should set it out so it doesn't kill the eyes of several people? I think I set my paragraphs out by train of thought...one topic will have one paragraph etc. I don't really know if thats the way to go though. I'm not really sure on how I should go about spreading them out more for fear of disrupting the...uh...train of thought...flow...thing.
Make paragraph breaks randomly, but make it look not random. I personally like using single sentences or thoughts to split up long paragraphs.
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JFC: thanks for that! :)
rndmnwierd: phew. I looked at my third chapter and realised that I had paragraphs the size of elephants and thought "somebody won't like that, better fix em!". Lol, but seriously thanks for the heads up on that. :P
Oh yeah, I noticed you suggested something similar to DO Me DO Me. Are you a mission to cleanse the world of excessively long paragraphs or something? Hehe j/k :D
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Chapter 3
Damn, that lion cub is so cute! I squeal along with the rest of the girls as Miki picks up the semi-dead looking cub. I can’t help but laugh at her baby-pink jump suit.
I can’t believe management actually convinced the safari park to let us borrow the poor thing. Well…I guess when we’ve promoted the place so many times already, they have to return the favour. I remember watching U-spirit when they followed Maki for three days. Seeing her love for animals come out when she went to Fuji Safari Park made me wish I was there with her.
Of course, back then it was just idolisation and admiration. Now…it could be anything more than that. Thinking about last night, I can’t help but wonder what was going through her mind all that time, especially just before she left. Did she lose as much sleep as I did over it? I sure hope she did…because otherwise I would feel like an idiot if it was only me thinking so hard about it all. What am I saying? Do I even still have those feelings for her? I roll my eyes at myself. Of course I do, why else would I be so worked up over this all?
“Reina, please don’t roll your eyes at me. And why haven’t you flipped your card yet?” Ishikawa-san’s voice brings me out of my thoughts. I look at everyone else, flip cards facing the camera. When did they do that?
“Oh, sorry. I was still thinking about my answer,” I lie. I don’t even know what the question is. I can’t believe I just tuned out like that in the middle of filming.
“It’s ok, we’ll edit this part,” one of the staff calls out. I sigh as I try to work out the question by peeking at everyone else’s answers, and quickly scribble something down.
Did she even mean it when she said we would have dinner together again? I wonder if we would go to a restaurant, or if she would invite me to her place again like she originally did. I feel a guilty pang hit me because she must have bought and prepared meat for the yakiniku that we never ate together. I should probably pay her back for the meat…no wait…that’s just stupid. I should just invite her out to dinner one day. But she said she would tell me when she had time off. What if she thinks that I’m annoying for wanting to meet again so soon?
“Reina!”
“Yes?!” I instantly sit up straight and look around, only just realising that I tuned out again. A few members laugh not-so-discreetly at me. Everyone but me had already written on their next flip board. There was another question already? I really have to start paying attention or people will think that there’s something really wrong with me.
I’m glad that this is the last segment that we’re filming for today, otherwise I might end up just staring into space for another hour or so.
For the last few minutes I manage to concentrate on the filming rather than my personal life. Even so, I can still feel it gnawing at my brain cells, making me work extra hard to push it out of the way for the time being.
After filming is finally over and we exchange many otsukare-sama deshita’s with the staff, I practically run to my dressing room and slam the door shut. I need time to recollect my thoughts so that I’m not continually confusing myself. Maybe Maki would be in the building today for something. I might get a chance to run into her. Who am I kidding? She probably has a really tight schedule anyway… I check my phone and find two new messages from…Maki. Maybe she has been thinking along my train of thought after all.
“I know it’s sudden, but would you like to have dinner tonight?”
Would I? Why wouldn’t I?! Ugh, I should calm down before I get ahead of myself. It’s just dinner after all. I open the next message.
“How about yakiniku at my place? :)”
I smile at the smiley face and reply right away. “Sounds good to me!” I hit send, wondering if that sounded too eager on my part. A few seconds pass and my phone rings. Looking at the called ID I see that it’s Maki. I stare for a moment, not wanting to believe how fast she just responded.
“Hello?”
“Hello, Reina-chan? Have you finished filming?”
“Uh, yeah. How did you know we had filming?” I don’t recall telling her…
“Miki told me. Anyway, should we leave now?” Leave now? What is she talking about? Unless…
“Maki-san…where are you right now?” There’s a pause and a shy giggle. Why does it sound like I can hear her in both ears? It’s only a gut feeling but I get up and open the door to find Maki standing there smiling brightly at me again. I can’t believe her! I can’t help but smile back as she hangs up.
Before I can say anything she pushes past me, grabs my bag and then walks out again, this time taking hold of my hand and pulling me along. I can barely register the fact that she’s dragging me off in such a strange manner. What’s the rush? Within the next ten minutes Maki manages to pull me outside, hail a taxi, throw me inside and then clamber in after me. My head was starting to spin, not from being dragged around like a garbage bag, but from Maki’s strangely energetic behaviour and enthusiasm to get me to her place. It’s as if she has something incredibly amazing to show or tell me.
I don’t realise that I’m staring at her until her eyes meet mine and for a moment we’re locked in our own moratorium. I glance away, feeling the blush rise in my cheeks. Those few seconds seemed to bring back all the uneasiness I had tried to forget. As the taxi continues in the direction of Maki’s apartment, we sit in a deadly and uncomfortable silence for several minutes. My mind tries to find something interesting to say, but draws a blank.
“So, um, how was filming today?” Maki breaks the awkward air, attempting to resurrect some form of communication. Glad for the break, I jump into it right away.
“You won’t believe it! They brought in a lion cub!” I gush excitedly to her. She squeals and calls me a liar, which I deny and tell her to ask the other members. With this playful conversation the awkwardness disappears once again, and just like last night, we speak to each other like normal friends, happy to be in one another’s company. When you’re relaxed and having fun, time seems to fly by faster. Before I know it, we had arrived at Maki’s complex.
Even when we enter her apartment and chat about nothing, I still feel some sort of adrenalin rush from being so excited. It’s strange – this is only the second day that we’ve really spent with each other, yet it feels like it has been a lot longer. Almost as if we’ve been doing this all our lives. We finally take a moment to catch our breaths and sit in silence, though this time it’s a comfortable one.
“I like being alone with you,” Maki says contently, her eyes closed and head resting on the back of the couch. I just sit there, my eyes wide at her. Suddenly she opens her eyes, realising what she just said. Maki shifts around uncomfortably. The comment itself isn’t that big of a deal, but considering how we’ve been acting towards each other, and also taking into account our feelings…it was a little weird hearing it. Why couldn’t we just say what we were feeling without hesitation? We both want the same thing, right?
“I like it too,” I say quietly after an awfully long minute has passed. I don’t look at her, instead staring at my own knees. I should just tell her. Now. Right now. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. Why can’t I say it?
It feels really unpleasant now, sitting here in silence, waiting for the other to say something first. I have a desperate urge to just leave, and try to think of a believable excuse. I suddenly feel warmth wrapped around me. Huh? I sit there stunned. My heart beats rapidly and my cheeks blush for the umpteenth time since Maki stepped back into my life. What is she doing? Is this her solution for everything? Can’t she do anything else besides put her arms around me when things start to take a turn in an undesirable direction? I bite my lip, trying to fight back the lump in my throat and the tears that would surely follow that.
“Stop it,” I barely manage to say clearly. I stare ahead of me into nothingness and her form stiffens against me. “Please…just stop…” I say, my voice cracking. Maki withdraws her arms from me and moves back a little.
“Reina-chan?” Maki questions, the uncertainty in her voice almost scares me into apologising but I don’t. How can we continue like this without communication? It’s not possible…it won’t work. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that,” Maki says softly.
She fidgets with the loose papers and supermarket brochures on her coffee table; putting them into piles and then moving them from one corner of the table to another. Watching her do this is starting to irritate me. Finally she stops trying to look unaffected and turns to face me directly. Her eyes tinged with a certain sadness that wrenches at my heart and makes me wish I hadn’t said anything in the first place.
“Look…I didn’t mean it like that…it’s just tha-“
“That what? That you don’t enjoy those small moments we share?” Maki sharply cuts in, sadness quickly turning into anger, accusing me of things that aren’t anywhere near the truth. I swallow back tears and shake my head.
“No! You know it’s not like that. Don’t just throw around accusations like that without letting me finish what I was trying to say,” I reply almost in disbelief. She sits there stubbornly; ready dispute whatever comes out of my mouth. “It’s just that…that…” she looks at me coldly. She’s giving me the chance to say what I wanted to, but why am I having trouble with it now? “We don’t really talk much, do we?” I ask her quietly. Maki’s cold stare continues.
“We talked a lot last night, and today,” she says matter-of-factly.
“But it didn’t have anything to do with us,” I reply.
“I don’t follow you, because it seemed to me that we talked a lot about ourselves last night. Were you there or not?” Maki bites back. When did she become so hot headed? I take a few breaths in an effort to calm down.
“Not just us…I mean…us...” I say, averting my eyes from her gaze and instead look at my hands. “Every time it gets weird you just hold me…and then the issue seems to fix itself…there’s something not right about that,” I tell her, still not looking at her.
“So you’re saying that you never want me to hold you again? Maybe you should have made that clearer from the start! You certainly didn’t seem to mind all those times that I did hug you. If anything you just – “
“It’s not like that!” I cry out, tears finally escaping from my eyes. “I just mean that we should talk about things more! All we do is get awkward…then you hold me…then we move on as if nothing happened.”
“If you feel that why then why didn’t you say so earlier?” Maki questions me. I finally look up at her, and am a bit surprised. Her eyes are darker than normal, glassy from trying to hold back tears.
“Because every time I tried you would just put your arms around me! How can I compete with that…I’m powerless to do anything against that…” I tell her, tears flowing steadily down my cheeks.
“What are you trying to say?” Doesn’t she get it? Her ignorance fuels my anger and before I can think twice I say something incredibly stupid.
“Don’t pretend like you don’t know! How can I do anything when I have those pressing into me?!” motioning my wet eyes towards her chest. I regret the words as soon as they leave my mouth.
As realisation dawns on Maki she promptly stands up and after a moment of glaring at me, she walks to the glass door of her balcony. She stands there stiffly, looking confused and infuriated at the same time. She sniffles and I mentally curse myself over and over again.
That’s completely not what I wanted to say. It doesn’t even have anything to do with the situation – it was just a messy slip of the tongue that caused those words to tumble out.
“I’m sorry…that’s not what I meant! I just…it’s not really…they’re not…” How can I fix what I’ve so stupidly said now? “It’s just…they’re more noticeable recently…” Damn it! How can I say two stupid things in a row? Maki glances at me with hurt in her eyes, slightly red from crying. My own eyes feel puffy and tired too.
“What do you mean?” Maki quietly asks me. The panic in my mind doubles as I try to put my thoughts into words that won’t sound idiotic or like they’re implying something that they’re not. Maki turns back to staring out into the dark city landscape. I get up, wipe my face and stand a small distance behind her. She doesn’t turn around. “People keep making a big deal out of it…saying things…like I got surgery for them…and…” Maki trails off, her voice barely a whisper. I hadn’t realised that the things tabloids said had affected her so much. My heart reaches out to her, but my body stays glued to its position.
“That’s not what I meant…” I say quietly, hoping that I didn’t say something even more idiotic.
“They’re real,” Maki whispers.
I’ve never thought otherwise, but because I rushed to say something without really thinking, that’s what it seems like I believe. I never knew the kind of pressure she faced before this. I walk up to her and stand before her, looking up at her tear-stained face. I shuffle in closer to her until there isn’t any space between us left and then lean my head in the crook of her neck. At first Maki shies away, curling back defensively but I take another step in. Eventually, she relaxes.
“I know they are,” I whisper back to her. My tears begin to soak her top as we stand there in silence, leaning against each other for support. I blindly reach down and search for her hands, grasping them lightly, never wanting to let go.
Finally, though reluctantly she tugs her hands free of mine to wipe away my tears as well as her own. I stand there feeling more than guilty for what I just did to her. Maki leads me back to sit on the sofa and I wonder if she’s angry at me.
“Goto-san…just now…I didn’t mean to bring that up. It just slipped out before I could think about it and I – “
““Hey…I told you before. It’s okay to call people by their first names,” she says, this time being sure of herself. I breathe a sigh of relief as she rolls back into her natural self. I hadn’t even realised that I had called her ‘Goto-san’. Maki smiles that smile at me, and as simply as that I know she’s forgiven me.
I look away for a moment and something that I didn’t notice earlier catches my eye on Maki’s coffee table. It’s a simple silver photo frame. I lean over to pick it up and instantly feel the tears well up in my eyes all over again. I fight them back and glance at Maki, who’s giving me a sheepishly shy look.
It’s the photo that we took with my camera in the ferris wheel during Futarigoto. I got an extra copy developed and gave it to Maki, who at the time seemed indifferent. I feel Maki move closer to me as I continue to stare at the picture, amazed that she had kept it in a place where she would be able to see it so often. In one corner of the photo is a set of numbers scrawled in Maki’s handwriting. Though I already know the answer, I point to it and question her with my eyes, too touched to be able to say anything comprehendible. Maki smiles at me, her eyes shining with bubbly affection.
“0-7-5-1-0. ReinaGotou. It’s our number,” Maki says proudly as she wipes a lone tear from beneath my eye and takes the frame from my hands, placing it back on the table.
I shuffle a bit closer and leaning in I tentatively clasp my hands around her waist. After some hesitation she lightly wraps her arms around my shoulders. Is this what people do when they can’t express their feelings in words? I suppose the saying ‘actions speak louder than words’ rings true here. Her breath is steady against the top of my head, but against her neck, I can feel her pulse faintly beating at a much faster rate. Is she scared? Nervous? Anxious? Eventually she pulls her arms away from me, and likewise I do the same (though hesitantly).
“I’m sorry! Just now you were saying we shouldn’t – “
Maki stops when I put a finger to her lips, silencing her. She looks confused, her brow furrowed in a manner that I can only describe as utterly cute. She has her hands firmly flat on either side of her on the couch, determined not to move them.
“No, I’m sorry…” I don’t finish because I choke on my words and look down at my hands, fidgeting with the hem of my shirt and suddenly realising that I had touched Maki’s lips. It doesn’t really occur to me how close a range we’re sitting at until I turn and face her again. Slightly taken aback by Maki’s nose being barely an inch away from mine, I instantly freeze and turn rigid. My throat feels dry and I have to swallow several times to wash away that feeling. Maki leans forward until our noses are touching and I can feel her gentle breath.
“Thank you for being here tonight,” Maki whispers, sending a shudder through my body. I see myself reflected in Maki’s eyes, and within the depths of those eyes I can see her understanding of my thoughts without actually having been told. It doesn’t really matter right now that we don’t say much about ourselves because clearly within each other, we can see and understand one another completely.
And with that, she presses her lips against mine for a split second. My heart pounds as I stare into her eyes. What did that mean just now? Am I supposed to do something else? I don’t know what to do, even though I’m secretly happy with that intimate contact. Before I can think about it further she kisses my lips again, and again it’s brief. She stares intently into my eyes, looking for any sign of hesitation. I know that she won’t find any, and my body moves at its own accord. I press my lips against hers this time, staying there until I feel her lips move against mine. Suddenly but surely her tongue finds its way to mine and I feel my cheeks flush at the sensation of it. I allow myself to melt against her, ready to offer myself completely and undoubtedly to her. Maki gently pushes me so that gradually we’re lying down with her body above mine. She plants light, warm kisses along my jaw line and eventually reaches my throat. I let the sensations take over, not even thinking about where this could lead or how we might feel afterwards.
Suddenly she stops and I feel her breathe a contented sigh beside my ear. Maki squeezes herself between myself and the couch with her head beside mine, lying there with her arm draped across my stomach. I lie there beside her, somewhat relieved that she stopped before it got too intense to control.
“Maki-san,” I breathe as I reach down to take her hand, not really knowing what I’m doing. I turn my head to face her and she gives me a sheepish grin to which I find myself almost unknowingly smiling back at. Maki simply gazes into my own eyes, happy with the both us of lying in silence. I must admit, I feel unexpectedly comfortable with this as well.
As we continue to lie there without uttering a word, I feel as if the sun has finally basked me in all its warm glory, lighting up the path ahead of me, allowing me to face the unknown. At the same time it’s also behind me, as well as beside me holding my hand, lending me its magnificent strength and as I move on, it wraps its arms tightly around me, never letting me out of sight. This is the strength, the support, the love…the brilliant sun that is Maki.
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-jumps for joy- YAY~! ReinaxGoto kiss! -still jumps for joy- You're my hero~! <3~! Can't wait til you write mooooore~! <3~!
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YAY!!!!!!!!!!! I've been waiting for this chapter for days and it was worth the wait. The tension, the tears, all of it was just awesome! And now they're happy and understand each other, right???
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Wow...very touching chapter here...really well done goosefish...
not easy to confess your love when you are in h!p huh ?...after reading Aya and Miki's one in M.A.R.I and Risako's one in It's not your fault so please stop your crying now.. now we get another hard/sad one...but what a great job (i havn't read all the fics, so i'm sure i'm missing a lot)...you guys are very impressive. finding the correct words would take all my life...but you just made it sound so easy...
back to your fanfic
i've notice you found a Title...love that too.
This is the strength, the support, the love…the brilliant sun that is Maki.
i'm already speechless...well, i guess what i have to say is that i love your fic, it's really a pleasure to read it...discovering how this little couple is going to evolve...so keep your great job , please :)
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AH! SWEET! XD
Oh yeah, I noticed you suggested something similar to DO Me DO Me. Are you a mission to cleanse the world of excessively long paragraphs or something? Hehe j/k :D
Actually I am. But shh! Can't let the paragraphs know that!
You know, I make most of my paragraphs only three or four sentences each. But I'm just wierd like that.
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Man this is good. Its refreshing reading about Reina being shy and insecure instaed of the yankee personality she usually shows XD I like how you wrote the massage part too. Very very nice :)
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Very sweet and beautifully written.
I love the way you write and how you illustrate what's on Reina's mind.
Keep up the good work!!
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Cute!!!!
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Can't believe I missed the new chapter earlier today :evil:
I have run out of words to say because the others above me have said it already. :)
All I can say now is "Nice job! Please keep it up!" :thumbsup
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I have run out of words to say because the others above me have said it already. :)
All I can say now is "Nice job! Please keep it up!" :thumbsup
I second this XD GANBATTE~ :thumbsup
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wow, didn't expect that. Reina/Maki seems to be in this season huh? I first read the story from the other forum, so don't stop posting there. Maybe it'll help jumpstart the thread again. :lol: Well you've captured my interest so I can't wait to see what happens next.
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Disappeared for a while because I've been trying to study. :evil: HSC is just around the corner and it's totally killing me!
Thanks to all who read again! :P
-jumps for joy- YAY~! ReinaxGoto kiss! -still jumps for joy- You're my hero~! <3~! Can't wait til you write mooooore~! <3~!
Hero? YAY!! More will be coming soon!
YAY!!!!!!!!!!! I've been waiting for this chapter for days and it was worth the wait. The tension, the tears, all of it was just awesome! And now they're happy and understand each other, right???
Well, we'll just have to see about that :D
Wow...very touching chapter here...really well done goosefish...
not easy to confess your love when you are in h!p huh ?...after reading Aya and Miki's one in M.A.R.I and Risako's one in It's not your fault so please stop your crying now.. now we get another hard/sad one...but what a great job (i havn't read all the fics, so i'm sure i'm missing a lot)...you guys are very impressive. finding the correct words would take all my life...but you just made it sound so easy...
back to your fanfic
i've notice you found a Title...love that too.
Quote:
Originally Posted by goosefish
This is the strength, the support, the love…the brilliant sun that is Maki.
i'm already speechless...well, i guess what i have to say is that i love your fic, it's really a pleasure to read it...discovering how this little couple is going to evolve...so keep your great job , please :smile:
I don't think it's easy to confess your love even if you're NOT in H!P, and I think trying to find the words so that you can say exactly how you feel is extremely difficult. Thus, we have Reina and Maki not really knowing how to say what they feel.
AH! SWEET! XD
Quote:
Originally Posted by goosefish
Oh yeah, I noticed you suggested something similar to DO Me DO Me. Are you a mission to cleanse the world of excessively long paragraphs or something? Hehe j/k :grin:
Actually I am. But shh! Can't let the paragraphs know that!
You know, I make most of my paragraphs only three or four sentences each. But I'm just wierd like that.
I think sometimes when I make my paragraphs too short it starts to look too raggedy... BAH! We've discussed the length of paragraphs over a number of posts now! XD
Man this is good. Its refreshing reading about Reina being shy and insecure instaed of the yankee personality she usually shows XD I like how you wrote the massage part too. Very very nice :smile:
Thanks! I think all the members have some sort of insecurities though...wait...I think everyone has insecurities regardless of how much they tend to try and hide it.
Very sweet and beautifully written.
I love the way you write and how you illustrate what's on Reina's mind.
Keep up the good work!!
Thanks for the support, I'll keep trying to write and finish this fic!:)
Cute!!!!
XD All I can say is: that made me squeal!
Can't believe I missed the new chapter earlier today :evil:
I have run out of words to say because the others above me have said it already. :smile:
All I can say now is "Nice job! Please keep it up!" :thumbsup
I'll certainly try my best!
Quote:
Originally Posted by wordsworth
I have run out of words to say because the others above me have said it already. :smile:
All I can say now is "Nice job! Please keep it up!" :thumbsup
I second this XD GANBATTE~ :thumbsup
Lol, in that case...how many different ways can I say "I'll try my best"? :bounce:
wow, didn't expect that. Reina/Maki seems to be in this season huh? I first read the story from the other forum, so don't stop posting there. Maybe it'll help jumpstart the thread again. :lol: Well you've captured my interest so I can't wait to see what happens next.
Haha yeah, I didn't realise that it was until I read some of the fics here:lol:. Don't worry, I had no intentions of stopping my posts at the other forum. It's just been trying to cram in study all the time and trying not to let myself wander away from that too much. But now that you mention it, I'll post the next two chapters up over there :)
Next chapter coming up soon!
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YAYAYAY!
Next chapter coming up soon!
That one sentence has made me the happiest person alive, for today! =)
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I'm a very happy person tooo~! <3~!
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SeeYa and Yuuyami: Aw, glad you guys feel that way! :oops:
And here we have the next chapter. It turned out abit strange and went in a completely different direction from what I originally intended, but a chapter is a chapter so here you all go :P
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Chapter 4
“Say Reina, you’re in a really good mood today. Did something special happen?” Eri asks me curiously. I think about last night and feel myself blush at the thought. Luckily, we’re on a break for dance rehearsal and my face is already bright pink. I wipe my face with my towel and just smile at her, not wanting to give too much away.
“Yeah…it’s like you’re shining all over. Then again, that’s probably all the sweat you’re covered in…” Sayu says quite seriously. She doesn’t even realise that had she said it in a slightly different tone it would have been a joke. Eri and I laugh at her because of this and she puffs out her cheeks, demanding to know what it is that’s so funny. I smile to myself again as I think about Maki. I wonder if I’ll see her today…or if she’ll message me…or if she’ll call…or…
“Reina!” Eri pokes my arm. I look at her questioningly. “You look way too happy. Spill!”
“Wh…what? You’re imagining things Eririn! I’m the same as every other day,” I try to convince her. Even while denying her claims my grin only grows wider and I’m unable to control it. I feel so giddy and bubbly inside that I just laugh at Eri’s unimpressed face.
We spend the remaining minutes of the break arguing about my happiness and then have to get stuck into the last hour of intense dance practice. It’s gruelling, it’s harsh and for some reason I’m completely loving it. At the end of rehearsal our instructor gives us a quick briefing.
“You all know the songs, you all know the dances. A few of you have slacked off today but don’t go turning that into a habit. You should be giving it your all like Tanaka did today.”
Suddenly there’s a rush of hushed voices surrounding me and I feel slightly uncomfortable with the praise, even though I’m happy to be receiving it. Was I really any different today? Eri quite blatantly laughs at me and a few members mumble encouraging words to me. I catch Miki staring directly into my eyes and feel even more uncomfortable, despite my high spirits. I quickly think about the past few hours. Did I do or say anything to agitate her today? I can’t think of anything that would warrant a look like that from her so I try not to think about it.
As we head for the change rooms Eri and Sayu continue their interrogation on me, even though they’re aware that I won’t let up. I laugh at them, remaining victorious, and tell them to go get changed because they smell. This only fuels them on and they squeal and squeak even more until Miki tells them to be quiet.
Miki is being awfully cold today. I mean, more so than usual. Even while I have my back turned to her I can feel her gaze on me. I get changed as quickly as possible, no longer able to stand being under her watch, and am about to leave when she stops me. I feel a certain dread that only Miki can instil upon me.
“Come on, we’re getting a drink at the café,” Miki plainly orders.
“Uh…”
“My shout.”
I sigh. That’s not what I’m really concerned about here… I give up trying to defy her and just follow her to the café on the next floor. We sit at a secluded table even though the café isn’t busy at the moment and Miki orders us ice tea. I anxiously grip the sides of my chair as I wonder what sort of business she would ever have with me.
“Um, Fujimoto-san…did I do something to make you mad?” I decide to cut straight to the chase. She looks at me and then sighs. It seems as though the incredible happiness that I was floating in not long ago is unable to reach me right now, the presence of Miki is probably overriding it.
“I understand that you’re seeing Maki?” she says, clasping her hands in front of herself on the table. My face beets red as I stare at her, my mouth agape, unable to really comprehend how or why she knows this. Is this what she’s upset about? My mouth feels all dry and as soon as our drinks arrive I gulp down half the glass in one go. It doesn’t help. My head spins, racing through all the possible scenarios that may have led to this point. Suddenly I realise that Miki is waiting for an answer.
“I…well you see…it’s…” I’m having problems trying to give her a straight answer. Why is it so hard for me to say ‘yes’? Better yet, what does this have to do with her? My head spins again and I just nod in response.
“Are you serious about her?” Miki asks, staring directly into my eyes and making me uncomfortable. I already knew my answer to this question long before I was ever asked it. I can’t help but feel uneasy. Why is Miki prying into my business like this? Normally, she wouldn’t even think twice about something that doesn’t involve her. She already has Matsuura-san, so why is she so concerned about who Maki is seeing?
“I am, but…” I hesitate to ask her why she’s so interested. Instead I peer into my glass and swirl around the ice cubes with the straw.
“But what?” Miki quickly asks. Why is she so curious? Why should she have the right to any of these answers? I feel a little agitated from her direct approach and have a burning desire to just stand up and leave. “Is this what you really want?” Miki hits me with another question. What is she really up to? It’s driving me insane that I don’t know what she hopes to achieve out of this little interrogation of hers.
“Yes, but - ”
“But what? Why is there a ‘but’ on the end of all your answers?” Miki probes. I sigh because she’s taken it the wrong way now. The tone in Miki’s voice suddenly reminds of Maki last night during our little argument – angry, but uncertain and burning with desire to know the truth. I remember the look in Maki’s eyes and feel that familiar lump in my throat return. Miki clears her throat, instantly bringing me out of my thoughts. Come on, get a grip Reina!
“I’m not saying ‘but’ because I have doubts about Goto-san and I. I’m saying ‘but’ because I’m wondering why you’re so interested in this…” I answer truthfully, wondering if I would somehow set her off. For a split second Miki looks uncomfortable, but it was brief so I’m not sure if I really saw it. She sips her ice tea and doesn’t answer me. Why is she hiding her reasoning now? Isn’t she the straight forward Fujimoto Miki that we’ve all come to accept? What’s gotten into her?
“Because she cares about you.”
The voice startles both Miki and I, and we jump in our seats. I look up to see Matsuura-san standing just behind Miki, gazing down at both of us. Wait a second…she cares about me? I mean…not that I mind or anything, but just hearing it actually being said is strange. Especially because it’s Miki.
Matsuura-san pulls a chair up to join us and then reaches over to take a sip of Miki’s tea. Meanwhile, Miki sits there scowling at her.
“I thought you had voice training,” Miki says in annoyance. I can’t believe it…Miki getting all sore because her tough image was taken apart by one simple sentence. I almost laugh at the situation but then remember my manners.
“Sensei was sick so we finished early. Anyway, don’t go changing the subject,” she scolds Miki before turning to look at me. “Don’t mind all her questions about you and Gocchin…she just gets worried about you two sometimes.” I sit there with my mouth most likely wide open. This tiny piece of insight is almost too intense too handle. I’ve never heard of this side of Miki before. I thought she only ever got worried about Matsuura-san…but now…
“What? Too hard to believe?” Miki asks, giving me an icy look. This person who is throwing daggers at me with her eyes gets worried about me? Eehh?! Did some body abduct Miki and replace her with artificial intelligence? Why on earth would she be worried about me?
“No!” I half yell and half say loudly. Surprisingly, Miki laughs at me. “No…I just mean that…I don’t know really. We’ve never really spoken before this, that’s all…” I trail off, wondering if that made any sense to her. Another thought occurs to me. “How did you know I wasn’t lying to you just now…when you asked me those questions?” I ask her, genuinely interested.
“Despite how slow Sayu and Eri may be when it comes to your lies, for me you’re quite easy to read,” Miki snorts, some form of arrogance returning to her voice. Matsuura-san reaches the bottom of the glass, loudly trying to suck up the few remaining millilitres of tea.
Easy to read? The idea bothers me a little, but I don’t say anything. For some reason, the thought of Miki watching over me is strangely comforting.
“If you need anything, just ask Miki,” Matsuura-san brings me out of my thoughts. Miki scratches the back of her head, unsure of how to act at a moment like this. I find myself marvelling at this newly discovered Miki and nod enthusiastically, causing Matsuura-san to laugh. “And if she’s of no help, just ask me!” Matsuura-san informs me, to which Miki shoots her a playful, offended look.
“Thankyou, to both of you…for um…” I find it hard to put the words together all of a sudden. I feel grateful for them being so supportive…but this sudden intrusion has made me surround myself with walls again. I know that they’re good people, but I can’t bring myself to trust them so easily, especially when they seemed to have come out of nowhere so suddenly. I fiddle with my glass.
“We understand,” Miki says simply, looking and sounding awkward again. Matsuura-san laughs at her and then pulls her to stand up, telling me that they have a GAM recording to get to and leave me to myself.
As I finish the rest of my ice tea, I marvel at how these past few days have seemed to change my life. Amongst the rushed and busy schedules, I have managed to find some sort of solidity. All the same, I can’t help but feel a little bit uneasy at the presence of Miki and Matsuura-san. Why did they only make themselves known to me now? Does it have to do with my link to Maki? Why are they concerned about either of us? This is nagging at my mind, and I feel as if the two of them are hiding something from me.
I shake my head, trying rid myself of these uncertain thoughts. I’m sure that they’re just looking over Maki and I and they have good intentions. But still…
I sigh and leave the café before I give myself another headache trying to come up with an answer that probably isn’t even right.
I head down the corridor towards my dressing room. I need some time to recuperate and relax before heading on home. Somewhere along the way I pick up the voices of Miki and Matsuura-san behind a door. I thought they had a recording? Stopping dead in my tracks I wonder what they could be so secretively talking about. An uneasy feeling comes over me again as I stand as still as possible and listen.
“Was it really ok to speak to her about it?” Matsuura-san’s voice aks.
“Yeah…don’t worry about it too much,” Miki’s voice replies.
“But she didn’t seem too happy about it. And what would Maki think?”
“Well…this is the first time we’ve really spoken to her, so I think it’s understandable that she might be hesitant. As for Maki…she care’s about Reina…she’ll be ok with it.”
“If anything goes wrong...”
“I know.”
Before I hear more of what I’m not supposed to, I quickly slink away to my dressing room. My head begins to throb and my stomach feels unsettled. Why am I getting such a bad feeling from all of this?
I run over the conversation with Miki and Matsuura-san as well as what I just heard again and again. It all seemed so innocent…yet something just doesn’t sit well. If they came to tell me that they were worried about Maki and I, then why would they question their actions afterwards? Was it something that they did unintentionally and were now regretting? Why would they be concerned about what Maki might think about all this? I mean…it’s their personal opinion but it sounded as if they sort of…feared Maki’s judgement.
Maki.
I miss her already.
Sighing as I lean back in my chair, I wonder what she would think about all this. I want to tell her what happened…but the way that Miki and Matsuura-san spoke about her today…I don’t know anymore. What are they hiding from me? Is there something that Maki is hiding from me too? I thought that my anxieties ended last night, but now new ones have appeared making me question every single detail.
Ugh. My head is throbbing again. That’s it…I can’t exactly work this out on my own when I don’t even know half the story…I’ll ask Maki what she thinks the next time I see her, but for now all I can do is try not to worry.
As if!
I sigh yet again. I bet my forehead will get permanently creased with wrinkles already if I keep frowning for so long and worrying about what it is that certain people are really up to. These certain people who have somehow managed to weave their existences into my already hectic life, and then made me question their motives, made me question them as people, and made me question matters that I’m probably not meant to know about. Matters that concern Maki…how can I not be concerned?
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Maki! Maki! Maki! Reina! Reina! Reina! Marsha! Marsha! Marsha! Uh, what?
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XD ^ That was hella fast!!
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“What? Too hard to believe?” Miki asks, giving me an icy look. This person who is throwing daggers at me with her eyes gets worried about me? Eehh?! Did some body abduct Miki and replace her with artificial intelligence? Why on earth would she be worried about me?
I've laughed really hard with that XDXD
Good Job again!
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You're a talented writer. I find myself reading every word you wrote.:D
It's a good story, with a touch of mystery.
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ooooh..the story's getting interesting~~! :D love it when Miki's still doing the cool act after Aya shows up XD
[suspense]what's GAM's connection with this relationship?!? [/suspense]
hurry and post up a new chapter so that we'll find out!! :D:D:D
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Aliens cannot abduct Miki! It's Miki who abducts aliens and makes them abduct girls for her. XD
Miki seems uneasy with Reina and Gocchin's relationship. Is she really that concerned or is she just jealous? :o
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Ooooh, getting interesting indeed~! Gam's connection with Maki and Reina =_=...? I'm thinking of too many scenarios XD... Now you MUST write so I can narrow down the scenarios~!
-wears hardhat for protection-
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....My head hurts. Damn it all! Stupid suspense! Now I'm gonna go crazy thinking about all the things that can happen while waiting for the next chapter. How can you make this so interesting! GAM and Maki.... and Reina...I have no idea whats gonna happen, but it's definitely gonna be interesting. *sits and waits*
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Sorry, I'll make individual replies later coz right now...I'm in a lazy mood :D
Just wanted to say one thing for the time being:
Aliens cannot abduct Miki! It's Miki who abducts aliens and makes them abduct girls for her. XD
HAHAHA! I'm gona have to agree on that 100%!!! XD XD
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I don't know why but I found myself laughing at the part where Aya said Miki "cares about you". Maybe I'm nuts or something but I really enjoyed this chapter :)
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Hellloooooo ALL! :D
len.chan: lol, I can just imagine Miki saying something like that so I'm glad you luaghed!
katatsumuri: mystery eh?? I've never thought it about it like that, but now its hanging around in my mind! :rolleyes:
jafeijai: haha, I can't answer that so freely! But you'll all find out eventually!
wordsworth: concerned? jealous? all of the above? or none? you'll just have to wait and see!
Yuuyami: haha! that sounds like an order!:P A hardhat eh? I think I need me a few of those too!
SeeYa: *sits and waits with you* *twiddles thumbs* Yeahhh...next chapter coming up right after this!
lil_hamz: Yay! I'm happy that you enjoyed it! :)
Well, thankyou all again for reading!! :heart: :D And here we have the next chapter!
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Chapter 5
I don’t know how we ended up here, sitting and facing each other at opposite ends of Maki’s couch in silence. I sit with my knees hugged to my chest, while she casually has one leg folded under her and the other dangling off the side. We stare and stare. My heart pounds as I wonder what’s going through her mind. I can’t stand the tension any more so I finally look away, fidgeting with my hands.
Maki smiles and slides a little way towards me. Is this amusing for her? I’m here ready to leap off her balcony and she’s having a jolly good time.
“What are you doing?” I question her strange behaviour. She doesn’t reply and continues to stare at me, the lightest smile gracing her lips. My eyes narrow as I realise what it could be.
“Stop it!” I cry out in desperation and embarrassment. She looks a little confused.
“Stop what?” she asks innocently. Oh come on, as if she doesn’t know.
“Stop staring at my wonky eye!” I tell her angrily. I hug my knees tighter to my chest and avoid making eye contact. I’ve never actually told anyone to stop looking at my eye before, so I feel a bit weird about saying it to her. I feel my cheeks burn.
“It’s not wonky. It’s cute and I like it,” Maki simply says, continuing to stare. My cheeks must be shining bright red by now.
She doesn’t say anything as she slides closer again. Now she’s staring at my feet. After a few moments she grabs hold of both my ankles. Oh god, please don’t tell me she has some sort of weird foot fetish. I don’t have time to expand on that strange thought because all of a sudden she yanks my feet towards her. Yelping out as I try to regain some sort of balance, I look up to find her chuckling softly. As she continues to drag me towards her by my feet like a rag doll, I wonder if she’s gone insane. What the hell is she doing?
Maki pulls me so that gradually our bodies are touching, and she’s pulled my legs over hers and around her waist. I blush madly. I look at her and she’s blushing too. I don’t know where to put my hands, so I wrap them around the back of her neck, pulling her closer (if that was even possible in this position). My head reels and I think my heart pounds so hard that she could probably hear it. I swallow several times because my throat feels like a dirt track. Locked in this intimate position I can feel every breath she takes, and she can feel mine.
Finally, our lips meet. We kiss slowly and shyly at first. Our tongues dance intimately against each other, and my hands rake through her hair. The intensity builds as we kiss with more hunger, more force and more fire. We break apart for a moment, our breaths ragged and rough. She pushes me onto my back and kisses me again. Everything feels extremely heated. My heart races and so does my mind. I wonder if she’s ever kissed anyone like this before because it feels really good. After a few moments her hands begin to wander. Gently. Lightly. Barely touching me. I yearn for more.
Never in my wildest dreams had I thought about having Maki locked between my legs while passionately making out with her. Ok, that was a lie. I had thought about it, just never thought something like this would actually happen. Maki breaks away from my lips and I feel disappointed. I instantly forget that as soon as I feel her mouth against my neck. Sucking at my skin, leaving wet, hot trails, she makes me want her more than ever before.
Maki tears herself away from my neck because there’s a loud knocking at her door. Great timing. Nice way to kill the moment, whoever you are. Maki is conflicted, she looks at the door and then at me. The pounding continues. We’re still gasping for air, and she can’t decide what she wants to do. I don’t want her to get up.
“Ignore it,” I say firmly. She raises an eyebrow at my blunt command and shifts slightly on top of me. “Please ignore it?” I try to be a little nicer. Whoever is at the door starts calling out. Maki sighs, giving me an apologetic look and tries to untangle herself from me. I don’t want to let her go, but she’s stronger and manages to remove my grips on her.
“I’m really, really sorry. I’ll make it up to you,” she breathes against my lips, sending a nice, fuzzy feeling through my veins as she gives me a quick kiss. I don’t reply. I finally get to spend time with her, and it’s interrupted by someone hammering at the door. Why am I so upset over this? It’s not like we won’t get this opportunity again. I sigh and lie on the couch like a dead sardine as she answers the door.
I know that I was just trying to hide from my doubts, and now that the moment is ruined I have time to begin doubting again. It’s been two weeks since that conversation with the members of GAM, and one and a half weeks since I last saw Maki before this. I didn’t ask her about what she has to do with Miki and Matsuura-san… I was too scared. I’m not sure if they spoke to her at all after they spoke to me, and I’m not entirely sure that I want to know either. I know I’ve been thinking about it too much because last time Maki asked why I wasn’t ‘all there’. I made up some lame excuse about being tired. I don’t think she believed me…but she didn’t question me any further.
Gah…and wasn’t I the one who said we should talk about things more? So why can’t I bring myself to ask her something so simple? ‘Hey Maki-san, what have you got to do with Fujimoto-san and Matsuura-san?’ Hm…it doesn’t seem too hard…
Maki finally closes the door and returns with a small package. I sit up so that she can sit down beside me.
“What’s that?”
“Who knows. It’s from a family friend – he’s a doctor,” Maki replies, beginning to rip open the cardboard box. I wonder if now would be a good time to ask her. “De-stress Yourself in 10 Easy Steps,” Maki reads out the title of the book that was sent to her. For a moment she just stares at it, her eyes seem to glaze over.
“Maki?” I ask quietly, using the name she had told me to use, saying that I was being too formal all the time. What does the look in her eyes mean? I’m a little concerned now…but all she did was read the book title and then she seemed to be in another world. She blinks, looks at me and smiles.
“A little silly isn’t it? This book I mean,” she says and leaves it on her coffee table. She looks thoughtful. “Might be something you could use actually,” Maki says, reaching over to play with the simple bracelet that I’m wearing. I laugh at her.
“Is that so?” I ask playfully, wondering what she’s getting at. Her face remains serious as she pulls me into her arms and rests her head on mine.
“Yeah.”
My smile turns into a frown. Maki sounded sort of… defeated in her answer. For several minutes we sit in silence, thinking about whatever it is we think about. I wonder what she’s thinking about, and why she’s suddenly so uneasy. Maybe Miki said something to her… or maybe she has something to say to me… or maybe… maybe I’m just over analysing things again. I close my eyes and listen her steady breathing.
“All I wanted was for you to relax,” Maki says softly. My eyes snap open. What? What is she talking about? I haven’t voiced any concerns to her… and I haven’t showed any strain to her… at least I think I haven’t…
“What do you mean?” I say, moving my head to look at her. Her eyes show worry.
“I mean…something’s still bothering you. You didn’t say anything to me last time, and I let it be because I thought it would go away…but it hasn’t. Why can’t you just tell me?” Maki asks me sadly. My heart wrenches. She’s been worrying all this time? Why didn’t she say anything to me? Well, I could say the same for myself I suppose… but Maki was keeping quiet about it all this time. I look away uncomfortably… she hit the nail right on the head and I don’t know how to answer her.
“There’s nothing going on Maki,” I look up at her again, hoping she’ll buy it. Why can’t I be honest with her? She gazes into my eyes, searching for some sort of truth. I wonder if she can hear how fast my heart is beating right now.
“Even Miki said that you weren’t yourself lately,” she tells me. I narrow my eyes at the mention of Miki’s name. So Miki had been in contact with Maki? Why would she be? I thought they had nothing to do with each other the moment Gomattou’s activities had stopped.
“Fujimoto-san? What did she say about me?” I ask carefully, not wanting to give away my annoyance with Miki.
“That you were zoning out a lot, and you always had an anxious look on your face…things like that,” Maki replies. I can feel the tension between us steadily rising. It’s rising slowly, but it’s definitely there.
“What would she know?” I ask defensively. How would she know if I have something bothering me or not. In any case Miki is the cause of this entire situation. Why is she playing the innocent guardian? It’s Maki’s turn to narrow her eyes at me, and she pulls her arms away from me.
“Hey, Miki’s just looking out for you,” Maki defends Miki. My blood begins to curdle as I resent the very being that is Miki. I sit there and stare at the coffee table. Whose side is Maki on here? I hear her sigh. “Reina… Miki just told me what she saw, ok? There’s no need to be angry at her. I just asked her to keep an eye on you because I can’t always be there… I get worried about you, you know?” she says calmly, trying to reassure me. It doesn’t work. She asked Miki to keep an eye on me? I’m not some pre-schooler who needs to be looked after all the time. I look at Maki with disbelief as a sense of betrayal washes over me.
“So you think I need babysitting?” I ask her angrily. For half a second she looks confused and then understands what I’m saying. She shakes her head, her eyes full of panic.
“That’s not it! I just wanted to make sure that you’re ok, and Miki always knows when something isn’t right with people…” Maki tries to explain to me, tries to offer some sort of answer that would cool me down.
“I don’t have to be looked after all the time. So what if I’m four years younger than you? If you don’t like it then why did turn up again after all those years? What was the point in that if you were just going to put a watchdog on me? Why would you need one? To make sure I don’t fall and hurt myself? Is that it?”
I don’t even know what the words coming out of my mouth mean anymore. All that matters is that I say something – anything – so that I don’t break down and start crying. I don’t want to cry in front of Maki again. I don’t want to show her that weakness that is the cause of this all, the weakness that I can’t seem to control whenever I’m around Maki. I look at Maki – the shock and hurt in her eyes wrenches at my chest but I don’t say anything to try and ease it. Instead I just sit there stiffly, my eyes locked on hers.
“No,” Maki replies, her voice a mere whisper. This doesn’t even seem to be about Miki anymore, it’s turned into something about us. Seeing the tears form in her eyes is making myself tear up, my chest feels all tight as I try to fight it back.
“Forget it,” I stand up and promptly walk towards the door. I don’t want her to see me crying, so this is all I can do. I’m so frustrated and angry at her, but why do the tears have to show up all the time?
“Reina!” Maki calls out to me.
I don’t stop. I don’t turn around. I don’t say goodbye.
I slam the door shut before she can stop me and run into the elevator. Once the doors close I allow the tears to flow freely, the drops falling onto the floor, making me feel worse by the second.
Why did I get so angry at Maki? Did I overreact? Maybe Miki is partially to blame, because if Maki hadn’t mentioned her name, I wouldn’t have reacted the way I did. Great, now I just sound like I’m looking for someone to lay the blame on. I wipe at my face as I try to calm down.
I know it was more about that fact that Maki thinks that I need to be watched, like some juvenile, making sure I don’t get myself into some sort of trouble. I begin to think that I should go back upstairs to Maki and patch things up with her. It’s at this moment that I feel swamped by shame and embarrassment for acting the way I did. How can I look her in the eye after I carelessly ran out on her? I didn’t even try and listen to what she had to say…
The elevator reaches ground floor. I don’t go back up to Maki. I just keep on walking.
A small part of me wishes that Maki never stepped back into my life. It’s only a small part… but right now it feels so strong.
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AWWWW~! ;____; -but was okay! Had a harhat-
I think I have an idea about Miki and Aya's connection to Maki now, now that I crossed out many scenarios. But I still need to cross some more out to have a definate idea. WRITE MOOOOORE~!
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Yay, you got yourself a new fan here! :)
Great story and that last chapter... awwww, really... poor Maki/Reina.
I try figuring out what Miki/Aya have to do with all this, I'm really curious how the story will further unfold.
For several minutes we sit in silence, thinking about whatever it is we think about. I wonder what she’s thinking about, ...
this sentence made me really laugh :D
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*wipes tears away with a tissue* Aww, so sad! *sniffle*
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Ah! I'm away from my computer for two days and everything falls apart! I'm so sad right now. And the chapter started out so happy that I didn't even think it would end like this. Dammit. I need closure! You need to update so I can sleep...
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....Oh. Wow. Uh. I've got nothing. Well not exactly.... That....Made.....Me.....Sad. So sad....
...
POST MORE!
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That was good, I like the transition of the mood, from mushy to a lover's quarrel. It just what would have happened in reality. But I have to agree with the others, it's so sad too. :cry:
At least Gocchin doesn't have a foot fetish XD
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aaah...you like to make it complicated, don't you...
sounds like it's getting complicated because Reina still hasn't accepted it yet, Maki's feelings for her...i mean...she still thinks it can't be...real...oh well that's how i see it...
Chapter 4
“Say Reina, you’re in a really good mood today. Did something special happen?” Eri asks me curiously. I think about last night and feel myself blush at the thought. Luckily, we’re on a break for dance rehearsal and my face is already bright pink. I wipe my face with my towel and just smile at her, not wanting to give too much away.
hahaha...way to go, this girl is too curious XD
We spend the remaining minutes of the break arguing about my happiness and then have to get stuck into the last hour of intense dance practice. [...]As we head for the change rooms Eri and Sayu continue their interrogation on me, even though they’re aware that I won’t let up. I laugh at them, remaining victorious, and tell them to go get changed because they smell. This only fuels them on and they squeal and squeak even more until Miki tells them to be quiet.
:ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO:
Why is it so hard for me to say ‘yes’? Better yet, what does this have to do with her? [...]
Why is Miki prying into my business like this? Normally, she wouldn’t even think twice about something that doesn’t involve her. She already has Matsuura-san, so why is she so concerned about who Maki is seeing? “I am, but…” I hesitate to ask her why she’s so interested. [...]Why is she so curious? Why should she have the right to any of these answers? I feel a little agitated from her direct approach and have a burning desire to just stand up and leave. “Is this what you really want?” Miki hits me with another question. What is she really up to? It’s driving me insane that I don’t know what she hopes to achieve out of this little interrogation of hers.
something weird is coming...i was starting to think that Miki has something with Maki...untill...
“Because she cares about you.”
The voice startles both Miki and I, and we jump in our seats. I look up to see Matsuura-san standing just behind Miki, gazing down at both of us.
hum...interesting...
Wait a second…she cares about me? I mean…not that I mind or anything, but just hearing it actually being said is strange. Especially because it’s Miki.
yep...really really strange XD...i second lil_hamz
she just gets worried about you two sometimes.” I sit there with my mouth most likely wide open.
i can see that XD
“What? Too hard to believe?” Miki asks, giving me an icy look. This person who is throwing daggers at me with her eyes gets worried about me? Eehh?!
...oh well there are still secret part of them that we 'll never know...
Did some body abduct Miki and replace her with artificial intelligence? Why on earth would she be worried about me?
:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
I can’t help but feel a little bit uneasy at the presence of Miki and Matsuura-san. Why did they only make themselves known to me now? Does it have to do with my link to Maki? Why are they concerned about either of us? This is nagging at my mind, and I feel as if the two of them are hiding something from me.
aaahh...i can feel the headache coming ...
Somewhere along the way I pick up the voices of Miki and Matsuura-san behind a door. I thought they had a recording? Stopping dead in my tracks I wonder what they could be so secretively talking about. An uneasy feeling comes over me again as I stand as still as possible and listen
bad girl :P
“If anything goes wrong...”
“I know.”
...i really wonder what's going on and what is going to happen...
Maki.
I miss her already.
awwww....
These certain people who have somehow managed to weave their existences into my already hectic life, and then made me question their motives, made me question them as people, and made me question matters that I’m probably not meant to know about. Matters that concern Maki…how can I not be concerned?
outch outch outch...you make this little girl worry too much XD she is going to explode...
Chapter 5
really sad and intence chapter...:cry: you sure are good to change the mood huh...
“Stop it!” I cry out in desperation and embarrassment. She looks a little confused.
now that was weird...tension tension tension everywhere ....booooh~
“Stop staring at my wonky eye!” I tell her angrily. I hug my knees tighter to my chest and avoid making eye contact. I’ve never actually told anyone to stop looking at my eye before, so I feel a bit weird about saying it to her. I feel my cheeks burn.
i don't really understand her behaviour...but ---> "Stop staring at my wonky eye!” :ROFL
Maki tears herself away from my neck because there’s a loud knocking at her door. Great timing. Nice way to kill the moment, whoever you are.
sorry couldn't help myself laughing here...:lol:
“Please ignore it?”
:damnfunny
'Hey Maki-san, what have you got to do with Fujimoto-san and Matsuura-san?’ Hm…it doesn’t seem too hard…
questions questions questions....awswer ?
“De-stress Yourself in 10 Easy Steps,”
give it to Reina XD XD XD XD ----------> [ ]
“All I wanted was for you to relax,” Maki says softly.
Is Reina that easy to read ?
“Fujimoto-san? What did she say about me?” I ask carefully, not wanting to give away my annoyance with Miki.
trouble trouble trouble...
“Reina… Miki just told me what she saw, ok? There’s no need to be angry at her.
i second that...
I’m not some pre-schooler who needs to be looked after all the time.
lol....
it’s turned into something about us.
uh oh...
I don’t stop. I don’t turn around. I don’t say goodbye.
I slam the door shut before she can stop me and run into the elevator. Once the doors close I allow the tears to flow freely, the drops falling onto the floor, making me feel worse by the second.
Why did I get so angry at Maki? Did I overreact?
:cry:
Great, now I just sound like I’m looking for someone to lay the blame on. I wipe at my face as I try to calm down.
hehehe...she is still conscious...
A small part of me wishes that Maki never stepped back into my life. It’s only a small part… but right now it feels so strong.
outch outch outch...
stop torturing her gossefish XD
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Yuuyami: so what do you think Miki and Aya have to do with Maki? I'm interested in how people perceive the relationship between those three in my fic, so care to share your thoughts? :)
coachie: HIII!! *waves at you*. Welcome to Sun, glad that you somehow managed to find your way into this fic! :P
rndmnwierd: aww! *throws a box of tissues in your general direction*
YoukaiChica: looks like you won't be sleeping for a couple of days then! hehe.
SeeYa: Lol. More will be posted...when more is ready :D
wordsworth: Lol @ your comment about Maki + foot fetish!! XD XD
ChrNo: I love your commentary on segments of my chapters! I like reading reactions to the various parts. :rolleyes: Yay!! Oh, and I am NOT torturing her! It just so happens that...things turn out that way! Lol
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Chapter 6
Three days.
It’s been three days since I walked out on Maki. Three days since I last saw her face. Three days since I last heard her voice. Three days since I threw meaningless, angry words at her.
Three days.
For three days I have been at work on autopilot, my mind a million miles away. For three days I have stared intently at my phone, wishing that Maki would call me. For three days I have been sitting near my front door, wishing that Maki would knock on it. For three days, I have endlessly and listlessly been watching TV, searching for some variety show with Maki as guest. If only I could see her again, even if it is through some pre-recorded show.
My body aches from sitting in the same position for too many hours, unable to move for fear of missing my chance to see or hear Maki again. My heart aches too. It aches because for three days, I’ve missed Maki immensely. It aches because it’s over flowing with guilt and anxiety. Why hasn’t she called me? Sent me a message? Come to see me in person? It’s because I’m the one who broke everything between us. I’m the one who yelled at her. I’m the one to blame.
So then why haven’t I called her? Why haven’t I messaged her? Why haven’t I gone to see her in person? Because I’m scared. I’m scared of what she’ll say to me and how she’ll look at me. But more than that, I’m scared that she won’t say anything to me, and that she won’t even look at me. It’ll break my heart into even smaller pieces than it is already in.
My stomach grumbles in the silence and I wonder when the last time I had a decent meal was. I can’t remember. Food isn’t a priority in my mind right now. I’m more worried about Maki. What if she hasn’t been looking after herself? What if she hasn’t eaten or slept or done anything to keep herself healthy?
My mind wonders back to our last quarrel. What worries me is how she didn’t respond when I accused her of seeing me as a mere child. Why didn’t she answer? Why didn’t she defend herself? Why didn’t she shout at me for being unreasonable? Why did she just let me get away with it?
All these questions left unanswered are giving me a headache. It’s sort of funny, these past few weeks I’ve given myself more headaches than I have in my entire lifetime. I thought love was supposed to make you happier, and give you wings, and make you soar through the air without any worries to hinder you. Not make you angry and confused, and make you feel sick to your stomach stressing about things you shouldn’t need to stress about and give you headaches.
I lazily roll over and switch on the TV. The bright colours dance about on the walls in the darkness of my living room. I stare at them with envy, they look so carefree, prancing about from here to there. I flip through a few channels, searching for any sign of Maki. With her move from idol to artist I thought there would be more publicity around. The idol I so greatly admire has grown to be even bigger, expanding her world, reaching out to grasp the things that she desires with ease.
A familiar chorus comes from the TV and I look up to see the faces of two people that forced themselves into my world. GAM’s CM for Thanks! is playing, and I watch them sing and dance in their pink getups. Who are these people? I sigh as I change the channel, unable to look at them any longer.
A knock comes from the door. My heart skips a beat and my chest begins to feel tight. Is Maki here? I sit on the couch, too stunned to move. What if I’m just imagining that someone is knocking on the door? I shake my head vigorously, telling myself to not be so stupid. The knocking continues. I hastily get up and run to the door, and swinging it open I see –
“GAM desu~!”
I stand there in disbelief. Why do they look so happy? More importantly, why are they even here?! Before I can ask, the two force their entry into my apartment. My suspicion about them rises even more, even though I’m not really sure of what I’m suspicious about exactly. I sigh as I close the door behind them. I’m not in the mood for entertaining guests, especially guests that have some sort of connection to Maki but aren’t saying anything about it.
“Come in, come in,” I say unenthusiastically, even though they’re already sitting on the couch. Make yourselves at home while you’re at it.
“Have you been sitting in the dark all this time? Switch the lights on,” Miki orders me. I sigh and do as she says. Not really wanting to sit too close to them, I bring a chair and put it near the couch before sitting down.
“Do you want something to drink?” I ask out of habit, and then mentally smack myself for it. I’m already agitated at them for just being here.
“No, we won’t be here for long,” Matsuura-san waves a hand in decline. Well, that’s good to hear at least.
“What did you do to Maki?” Miki asks. I think my mouth falls wide open. She sure jumped straight into her interrogation quickly. I stare at her with my eyes wide in shock. Matsuura-san hits Miki on the arm.
“What Miki means to say is, what happened between the two of you?” Matsuura-san asks nicely. She seems so genuine that it makes me momentarily forget any doubts I had about her and Miki. I look down and fidget with my hands. Isn’t this getting a little too personal? Why should I tell them what went on that day with Maki? Wait, how do they even know that something happened in the first place?
“Uh… how…do you know?” I say like an idiot. I didn’t even finish the entire question, but they seem to understand.
“You’ve been pretty obvious at work you know… walking around with that glazed look on your face… walking into chairs and tables, and even into Koharu-chan… it’s not healthy Reina,” Miki explains to me. I feel something inside me stir. Her tone of voice was softer than usual, genuine like Matsuura-san’s voice earlier.
Why is it that I feel like I can suddenly trust these two? I want to tell them everything, I want to pour out my heart to them, I want to ask for help and guidance. Why now? Why so suddenly? I’m being torn in two directions. One part of me doesn’t want to believe them or trust them, while the other is willing to open up completely to them, willing to let them get closer to me. Which one do I choose? I finally look up into their eyes. Their eyes. They don’t seem normal right now. They show only sincere concern as they sit quietly and wait for me to say something. My heart has already chosen – I can trust them.
“You can talk to us, you know? It doesn’t have to be now… just, anytime you want…” Matsuura-san says gently, and Miki nods in agreement, offering an encouraging smile.
Once again, I feel tears gathering in my eyes. How could I have ever doubted them? I’m sure I was just being silly and maybe a little overprotective about their relationship with Maki. I’m sure that they’re all just good friends and that’s why these two are looking out for me. As I realise this, the tears finally escape from my eyes. I feel the urge to apologise for treating them like aliens, when they were just so concerned about me. I want to say I’m sorry for not believing in them in the first place. But I don’t do any of that. I just sit there and cry.
I don’t know why I suddenly feel so ready to accept Miki and Matsuura-san, but I’m glad that I finally have. Maybe it’s because I feel so vulnerable after arguing with Maki, that I’m unintentionally looking for someone to lean against. Maybe it’s because I feel guilty for suspecting them of things that I don’t even know what I was suspecting them for. Maybe it’s because really, they’re actually human beings, and they honestly care about Maki and I. Whatever the reason is, it has brought me to this point, completely embracing Miki and Matsuura-san with gratefulness and maybe a little dependence upon them.
I know that whatever issues and problems I have with Maki will eventually be solved and sorted through. I know that I can keep on moving forward with Maki’s hand in mine, because Miki and Matsuura-san are behind the both of us all the way, keeping an eye out for us, cushioning us when we fall and offering wise words of advice when we remain clueless.
At some point, Matsuura-san pulls me to sit down on the couch, and like a mother nurturing her young, she cradles me with tender affection, gently stroking my hair and telling me that everything will work out. Miki pushes my coffee table aside and demotes herself to sit on the floor beside my legs. She reaches up an arm, and takes one of my hands in her own. It’s her own way of comforting me, and I smile inside at how lucky I am to have found these two. No. I’m lucky that these two have found me.
Eventually I calm down, and having cried out all I can. I tell them everything that happened between Maki and I. From the day at kick-base practice to our first little hiccup to the day I yelled at her. I tell them everything. Miki and Matsuura-san don’t judge me, they only listen and take it all in. After I have confessed my heart out, they stay for a little while longer to make sure that I’m ok. I thank them again and again, words not enough to express my gratitude towards the two.
As I turn in for the night, exhausted beyond belief, I wonder how I ever doubted Miki and Matsuura-san in the first place. Somewhere deep inside, I know that it was a defence mechanism. My instincts instantly told me that I could trust them, but the walls surrounding my heart shot up, not wanting to let anyone get too close. That’s why their presence felt comforting and odd at the same time.
I dearly miss Maki right now…it hurts to think about her. In this darkness, the sun’s rays have dimmed a little, making it hard for me to see clearly. I can’t feel the warmth as strongly anymore, but amongst the darkness and uncertainty, two stars have appeared and helped guide me my time of need. The three former members of Gomattou have somehow weaved their ways into my life. I’m still in the process of learning about them on a more personal level, but I feel that with the three of them to lean against, it’ll be hard for me to lose my way.
-
WHOA...O_O....great chapter goosefish!! :thumbsup i really like how you described Reina's feelings at the beginning...the pain of being lovesick..so sad :cry:
so GAM is genuinely concerned? hm..normally i'd doubt that, and wonder if there was an evil plot in the process, but in this case, i'm gonna say YATTA~ at least now Reina has someone to lean on when she's hurting...:D
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I love your commentary on segments of my chapters! I like reading reactions to the various parts.
that takes a great weight off my mind...i was really starting to worry about my massive quoting of the text...thks for telling me that.
Chapter 6
30 "?"
+20 Maki
_________
= headache
are you sure you aren't torturing her lol
Three days.
11 times heh...ok...you aren't torturing her...she is torturing herself...
For three days I have been at work on autopilot
:lmao:
Why hasn’t she called me? Sent me a message? Come to see me in person? It’s because I’m the one who broke everything between us. I’m the one who yelled at her. I’m the one to blame.
...a good thing...she has some answers...
So then why haven’t I called her? Why haven’t I messaged her? Why haven’t I gone to see her in person?
...answer that start other questions heh...
Because I’m scared.[...]It’ll break my heart into even smaller pieces than it is already in.
:cry:
Food isn’t a priority in my mind right now.
does that mean it is for the rest of the time ? XD
I’m more worried about Maki.
what a nice little girl...but i can't say she is more worried about Maki than herself heh...but we can say she is worried about them...a lot
What worries me is how she didn’t respond when I accused her of seeing me as a mere child. Why didn’t she answer? Why didn’t she defend herself? Why didn’t she shout at me for being unreasonable? Why did she just let me get away with it?
now she mentioned it..:doh: same questions here...
All these questions left unanswered are giving me a headache. It’s sort of funny, these past few weeks I’ve given myself more headaches than I have in my entire lifetime.
aaaaaah we can feel it XD...
I thought love was supposed to make you happier, and give you wings, and make you soar through the air without any worries to hinder you.
it does...but when you have all those questions in your mind it sure can't be that easy heh :doh:... A familiar chorus comes from the TV and I look up to see the faces of two people that forced themselves into my world.[...]
Who are these people? I sigh as I change the channel[...]
:ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO:
you sure know how to make fun of sad situation too, don't you XD
I shake my head vigorously, telling myself to not be so stupid.
still conscious , still conscious...
“GAM desu~!!”
[..]Why do they look so happy?[..]
:ROFL
More importantly, why are they even here?!Before I can ask, the two force their entry into my apartment.
:ROTFLMAO:
I’m not in the mood for entertaining guests, especially guests that have some sort of connection to Maki but aren’t saying anything about it.
...i can feel some kind of anger and jealousy here ...
]“Come in, come in,” I say unenthusiastically, even though they’re already sitting on the couch. Make yourselves at home while you’re at it.
should i read some " " here ? XD XD XD
“Have you been sitting in the dark all this time? Switch the lights on,” Miki orders me.
why am i not surprised when i read this XD
]“What did you do to Maki?” Miki asks. I think my mouth falls wide open.
:panda_haha:
What Miki means to say is, what happened between the two of you?” Matsuura-san asks nicely.
aaaaah...ayaya and miki pairing is just si fun to read:D
Isn’t this getting a little too personal? Why should I tell them what went on that day with Maki?
somewhere...i second that
"You’ve been pretty obvious at work you know… walking around with that glazed look on your face… walking into chairs and tables, and even into Koharu-chan… it’s not healthy Reina,”
:ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO:
*dies*
]Why is it that I feel like I can suddenly trust these two?
same question here:doh:
I want to tell them everything, I want to pour out my heart to them, I want to ask for help and guidance.
aaaaah...is she aware that she gaves herself answer of her onw questions ? XD
I’m being torn in two directions. One part of me doesn’t want to believe them or trust them, while the other is willing to open up completely to them, willing to let them get closer to me. Which one do I choose?
man you are killing me XD...i would already have exploded...
My heart has already chosen – I can trust them.
hum...easly influenced by your heart , aren't you.
"You can talk to us, you know? It doesn’t have to be now… just, anytime you want…” Matsuura-san says gently, and Miki nods in agreement, offering an encouraging smile.
it sounds almost like she HAS to XD
I don’t know why I suddenly feel so ready to accept Miki and Matsuura-san
same question here...
Maybe it’s because I feel so vulnerable after arguing with Maki, that I’m unintentionally looking for someone to lean against. Maybe it’s because I feel guilty for suspecting them of things that I don’t even know what I was suspecting them for. Maybe it’s because really, they’re actually human beings, and they honestly care about Maki and I.
at least you find your own answer again XD
At some point, Matsuura-san pulls me to sit down on the couch, and like a mother nurturing her young, she cradles me with tender affection, gently stroking my hair and telling me that everything will work out. Miki pushes my coffee table aside and demotes herself to sit on the floor beside my legs. She reaches up an arm, and takes one of my hands in her own. It’s her own way of comforting me, and I smile inside at how lucky I am to have found these two. No. I’m lucky that these two have found me.
:cry: :cry: :cry:
you are good...really good...
Just like you know how to write a happy start which end really badly...you sure know how to do the opposite.
In this darkness, the sun’s rays have dimmed a little, making it hard for me to see clearly. I can’t feel the warmth as strongly anymore, but amongst the darkness and uncertainty, two stars have appeared and helped guide me my time of need. The three former members of Gomattou have somehow weaved their ways into my life. I’m still in the process of learning about them on a more personal level, but I feel that with the three of them to lean against, it’ll be hard for me to lose my way.
:pencry:
-
Wow. ChrNo definitely said all there is to say. You do do a really good job of switching the mood throughout the chapters. And its not a random click and the mood's changed. Its more of a gradual thing that is only apparent at the end of the chapter. But poor Reina! She's just torturing herself. Go to Maki, GO!! And GAM....they're quite nosy aren't they? But they're just trying to help, right? For the time being, it looks that way anyways.
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Awww, that's really all I can say since I cried in my last comment. Just know that I'm really touched...That's saying something.
-
I really don't know what to say 'cause chrno has already said everything as always XD just, keep the good work!
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Very nice chapter! I liked how you refered to the sun in the last paragraph for the title :]
I look forward to the future Maki and Reina confrontation!
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I love the entire chapter but the last paragraph was the bomb. :pencry:
Good work goosefish :thumbsup
-
Awww I missed chapter 5, but I'll comment on it anyway XD
I especially liked 2 phrases
a) "Stop staring at my wonky eye!"
b) I sigh and lie on the couch like a dead sardine as she answers the door.
Pure gold I tell ya, pure gold!
Chapter 6 made me think I was running through Reina's head and watching all her thoughts go by. It was that good.
GAM here just reminds me of W for some reason. Popping out here and there and interfering with other people 24/7 :lol:
OMG, I think Tsunku succeeded, he managed to let GAM replace W! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
-
Exams = goosefish is dead. :hammer:
Anyways, on with the comments!
jafeijai: thankyou for the support! Btw, I only JUST noticed that you have Sun linked in your sig. I feel so honoured!! :oops:
ChrNo: did you actually count every single question mark and 'Maki' ?!?! That is way too awesome! And yes I love your commentary, it's like reading an entire fic in itself!!
YoukaiChica: I'm glad you told me that, because I wasn't sure how the mood changes were going...if they were going smoothly or too abruptly. But now you've confirmed it so I feel abit more confident!
rndmnwierd: :cry: I'm just touched knowing that you're touched coz of this.
len.chan: haha yeah, ChrNo sure packs alot in! And I will keep up the work!
Yuuyami: Yay! Happy you picked up on the reference. As for Maki/Reina confrontation...I can't say when it is, but just that I hope it goes down well with everyone. XD Oh! Btw, love you avatar and sig. I've been meaning to tell you that for...AGES, but just keep forgetting everytime. Anyway..yeah...GAM is way too hot.
wordsworth: thankyou, I'll keep trying to keep you all happy with what I write :P . As a side note, :pencry:
lil_hamz: GAM reminds you of W?! Lol, I never thought about it like that...but now....it's stuck in my mind!!
Thankyou once again for all reading! Makes me happy! :D :D Next chapter up soon.
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Chapter 7
The days seem to dwindle slowly by as I wonder how I’m supposed to make up with Maki. I really need to do something soon. One - because I really, really miss her and two - because a few people are beginning to take notice of my strange behaviour.
One of those few people is Eri. She called me last night, her voice trembling with concern for me. I know why. It’s because… because she likes me in a certain way. She only shows that side to me when we’re alone, while in public she masks it quite well. I cringe at the thought, not because I think that it’s gross or anything, but because I can’t return those feelings to her, I can only leave her hanging. I don’t like hurting her like that.
I wonder if I hadn’t fallen for Maki, if Maki didn’t exist in my eyes or heart, then would I have returned Eri’s feelings? Even when I get angry at Eri, or shout at her, or call her names, or ignore her… she refuses to leave my side. It doesn’t matter how cruel I am to her, she’s always there for me. If only she didn’t like me like that, then I wouldn’t feel so guilty all the time.
I heave a big sigh. Analysing people’s relationships seems to be my only pastime recently. Analysing causes headaches… which is exactly what I have right now. Again.
I repeat my last few moments with Maki in the theatre of my mind for the thousandth time and ask myself the same questions again. Why didn’t she say anything? Did she just think that it wasn’t worth replying to? When she stayed quiet, it scared me even more. How can I fix this when I don’t even understand what’s going on in her mind? Why does she have to make such a big deal out of all this? I know that somehow I have to resolve this with Maki, but without understanding her point of view… there’s not much I can really do.
I force myself to get out of bed after lying there since the early hours of the morning. My mind is awake and alert, however my eyes and body are desperately suffering from a lack of sleep. If I keep up these sleeping patterns, I’m sure I’ll start to get bouts of sleep paralysis again.
Ugh. I sluggishly go through my morning routine before heading off to work with a seemingly ongoing headache. Today feels like its going to be a long day.
*****
I chat with Ai-chan and Gaki-san outside of Tsunku’s office. We had been called to be given a briefing on the upcoming concert tour, and are waiting for Tsunku to arrive. Minutes later he emerges someway down the hall and ushers us into his office.
“You all know that your tour is coming up. Now, I’ve made a draft of the setlist so that you can all start thinking about your performances,” Tsunku quickly told us as he hands us photocopies of the setlist.
I lazily scan through some of the songs we would be performing.
Morning Musume: The MANPOWER!!...
Morning Musume: Sexy Boy…
The opening songs seemed typical enough. I jump to the end of the list.
Fujimoto Miki: Osananajimi…
Takahashi Ai & Niigaki Risa: Koe…
Tanaka Reina: Glass no Pumps…
Morning Musu –
WHAT?!
I shake my head and look again. It’s definitely there. Tanaka Reina: Glass no Pumps. I might as well start taking pole-dancing lessons. I feel a bit woozy. Is Tsunku in his right mind? Was he drunk when he wrote this? I continue to stare at it until my eyes begin to blur.
Somebody pokes me in the ribs from behind, and I turn around to see Eri grinning like an idiot, pointing at my name and underlining Glass no Pumps with her finger. I do my best to glare at her. It works and she puts her hands up to surrender.
There is no way in hell I can perform that. It’s not my place to do that song. It’s Maki’s. She’s made it hers, how can I possibly pull something like that off? It belongs to her.
Or is it that I don’t want to perform it because it’s Maki’s song? I think about our last meeting and how it ended. Would I really be able to dance and sing Glass no Pumps, while our disagreement hung in the back of my mind? I check the paper again, just to be sure that it’s me, and that I didn’t read it incorrectly. I sigh and drop my head in defeat. It’s definitely there, and it most definitely is me.
“I know I said this is a draft, but it mostly likely won’t change,” Tsunku informs us, waving spare copies in the air. I try not to narrow my eyes too much at him. “That’s all for today, if you don’t have any questions you may leave”.
As we file out I begin to feel light-headed. Am I over-analysing the situation? Is it too erotic for my liking? Am I worried about ruining Maki’s song? I feel uneasy about the whole thing, but I can’t pinpoint exactly what it is that’s bothering me. I rub my head and make my way to the café to buy a drink. I really need to sit down.
Stirring the iced-chocolate that I had ordered but had yet to touch, I wonder if Maki knows that I will be performing her song. I miss her so much. I push the drink out of the way and rest my head on the cool table. This is giving me too much to think about.
“What’s wrong with you?” an uninterested voice pipes up near me. I lift my head to see Miki pulling up a chair opposite me. I don’t respond.
“Then can I have this?” she asks, already sipping my iced-chocolate. I wave my hand lazily, giving her the ok. “Saw your name on the setlist”. I groan. “You haven’t talked to her since that day, have you?” She sure gets straight to the point. I shake my head in response.
“I don’t know what to do anymore…” I hopelessly tell Miki. Her only answer is to offer me an empty expression. I stare at the table, unable to put my thoughts into words.
“You two had an argument a few weeks back, neither of you have tried to fix it since then, now Tsunku has dumped Glass no Pumps on you and since you aren’t on good terms with Maki, you feel uncomfortable about using her song,” she sums it all up, and then continues her attack on the contents in the glass. How did she know I didn’t like the idea of doing Glass no Pumps in this situation? I guess she wasn’t kidding when she said that she could read me easily.
Miki slurps the remains of the iced-chocolate loudly. When she can’t get any more out of it she gives up and slides the glass across towards me. A little surprised I catch it before it can get too far and look at her questioningly.
“Look, it’s been a while since you last spoke to Maki. Don’t you think you’ve been putting it off for too long?” Miki asks softly. She’s reverted back into the character that actually shows affection. I look down at the table, suddenly finding it very interesting. Why me? Why should I be the one to go to Maki? “We’ve got an hour before filming… think it over, but don’t think too hard, ok?” Miki tells me before standing up and leaving the café. I sigh and retreat to my change room.
*****
Sitting and waiting for the shooting of Hello!Morning to begin isn’t terribly exciting. I sigh, checking the clock for the uncountable time since I left the café. I had been waiting in my change room for almost two hours because filming had been delayed. Something about missing equipment. That extra hour didn’t help at all. I’ve managed to give myself another headache thinking about Maki and how I can possibly go about getting out of this mess.
There’s a faint knock at my door before Miki pokes her head inside.
“Fujimoto-san, what brings you here?”
“Why else do I ever turn up?” she answers with a question as she sits down at the table. My unexpected guardian has once again raised her over-confident head. It’s true. The only times she’s ever really spoken to me in private is when it concerns Maki and I. I don’t answer her. I don’t really understand why she keeps looking out for us, but I’m glad for her interferences because they help so much.
“I can’t understand her!” I cry out in exasperation. Miki raises an eyebrow. “I’ve thought about it non-stop. I don’t understand her reactions, her responses. I don’t understand why she hasn’t come to see me. I don’t get why it’s me who has to go see her! I don’t understand!” She rolls her eyes at me.
“Try harder.”
“How?”
“Tsk.”
Miki glares at me. It’s not as nasty as the other ones she’s given, but all the same it makes me feel uncomfortable.
“Look at it from her perspective. You’re four years younger than her, she feels like she’s robbing the cradle. She feels like you’re easily being controlled by her. Even if that’s not how it is, that’s just how she feels. It took her two years to come to terms with the age gap, even if it’s not a great big one. And just when she finally does come to terms with it, and you two get all cozy, you get angry at her about something that you didn’t think was such a big deal. But to her it is. All that hard mental work that she did all this time became undone, because you questioned her perception of you, and in doing so you questioned your feelings for her, even if that’s not what you really feel or wanted to say”.
I gape at Miki. She sure knew how to interpret things, and most of all, she’s probably right. I’m unable to respond so I continue to gape. She continues her rant.
“Why do you think it took her so long to come to you? She wanted to be sure of both her feelings and yours. She wanted to make sure that you weren’t just being influenced by her lead. As the older of the two, she feels responsible for anything and everything that happens, regardless of who is fault. Right now, Maki is blaming herself.”
This is what Maki’s problem is? She’s being ridiculous about it! You can’t just force someone into having these feelings, you can’t make them like you. Is she delusional?!
“But it’s not her fault! I really do like her. A lot. A whole lot. She’s not forcing me to have these feelings!” I exclaim, throwing my hands up in the air. Miki shakes her head, throwing me an agitated look. Am I missing something that was supposed to make me understand the situation better? Why wasn’t this clicking? We sit in silence for a few moments.
“Can you picture yourself romantically involved with Miyabi-chan? Or the Captain? Or any of the Berryz for that matter?”
I revolt, the thought of something like that makes my stomach churn with disgust for even considering it.
“What about °C-ute?” she asks.
“No! That’s just…wrong! And even if we were in a relationship they’d probably just be in it because they’re too young to really understa- - ”
Oh God.
Oh. My. God.
That was the missing piece. I gawk at Miki like a deer in headlights. She looks bored. She would probably be wearing that look during filming too, but that’s besides the point. The point is I understand Maki’s feelings. I felt sick about going out with a Berryz just now, but Maki has had to suppress things like that for me. I can’t even begin to imagine how she managed to deal with it.
We’ve both grown up and become more mature, body, mind and soul. That’s why she had more confidence that my feelings for her are real and only then did she act upon hers. I made her doubt it with all the horrible things I said to her. I feel like jumping off of the top of TV Tokyo. I feel like slitting my wrists. I feel like setting myself on fire.
How could I have been so insensitive? I groan and bury my head in my hands. The worst part is that Maki is still blaming herself. I have to speak with her, sort this out. Should I call her? No, she might hang up on me. It’s better done face to face. I’ll drop by her apartment after work.
“Come on, filming should be starting soon,” Miki says, snapping me out of my revelation.
We arrive at the set. Some of the members are already there. Miki makes her way to Yoshizawa-san and I make my way to Koharu-chan and Sayu. From the side of the studio I spot a small crowd of noisy girls. Squinting my eyes, I realise that it’s Berryz Koubou and °C-ute. Of all the days for them to be here, it had to be today. My stomach does violent somersaults again. I’ve definitely got to go see Maki today.
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OMG...another amazing chapter...i really like how you're portraying Miki as the supporting character in this...the emotions involved with these recent chapters :pencry: amazing...
:pencry::pencry::pencry: Please post up the next chapter quickly, i dun wanna wait to find out how Reina makes it up to Maki :pencry::pencry::pencry::pencry::pencry: [tries to make goosefish do what he wants] XDXD :pencry::pencry:
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You know what? I love you -glomp- *____________________________*
Can't wait til the Maki x Reina confrontation comes! -is still in hardhat-
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Tanaka Reina: Glass no Pumps...
Ooohhh boy. :o XD
“Can you picture yourself romantically involved with Miyabi-chan? Or the Captain? Or any of the Berryz for that matter?”
Ooohhh boy. Nice example Miki! :P
You can do it Reina! You can make up with Gocchin and you can perform Glass no Pumps with no problem at all.
Don't keep us waiting goosefish :)
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Amazing! Stupendous! Magnificient!
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Like wordsworth said, don't keep us waiting!! I love this story!! Love love love!!!!!! Its so well written. You actually feel like you're in Reina's head, having the same struggles she's having. And its just amazing.....
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Well, didn't wana keep you all waiting for too long. I hope you'll all like the next chapter. It's one of the ones where it goes in a different direction from what I first planned. :lol:
jafeijai: that's SO NOT FAIR! Using that thing against me like that! In any case it seems to be working too!! XD
Yuuyami: *glomps Yuuyami* The confrontation eh...I hope you're not expecting something big like... machine guns and grenades and stuff like that. :P *steals your hardhat*
wordsworth: Yeah, nice example Miki :) . Miki's got some good brains there, don't ever doubt that! And wait no more, next chapter right after this!
rndmnwierd: I've never seen those three words put together. But now I can probably say I've seen it all! :yep:
YoukaiChica: alright, alright. Here we go then! Next chapter here! :P
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Chapter 8
This is insane. I knock on Maki’s door again, and again there’s no answer. She didn’t answer the door yesterday, or the day before that. Is she even alive? What if something happened to her? I roughly shake my head and tell myself to shut up. Sighing heavily, I slide down against her door and sit on the floor. She has to come home sooner or later, and I have a day off tomorrow. I’ll wait.
I don’t know how long I wait for, because I can hazily feel someone shaking my shoulders. I must have dozed off. Squinting my eyes in the dark I make out Maki’s face barely inches away from mine. I sit up a bit. I feel completely awake now, remembering what I’m here for. She looks worried.
“What are you doing here?” she asks me carefully. I look at my fiddling hands before replying.
“I just…I came to see you,” I tell her honestly. She seems uncertain, looking nervous and uneasy.
“You should have called me then… my mum complained about not seeing enough of me since I moved out, so I stayed with her for a few days,” she says, looking a little more worried than before. That explains her absence. “How long have you been here?” I check my mobile for the time. It’s 12.34 am. I must have been in a pretty deep sleep.
“I came here after work…so since about 7.30,” when I tell her this her eyes widen as she stares at me in disbelief. She probably thinks I’m really stupid now, sitting here all this time. I feel a bit sick in my stomach. Maybe I should have just called her. “I thought you might not agree to meeting me if I just called…I thought it would be easier if I came to you to sort this out. If you want me to leave…” I trail off because all of a sudden her eyes become watery. I don’t know how to react. I try to move but I can’t seem to.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers, barely audible. I blink. Why is she apologising? I’m the one who screwed everything up. I’m the one who got angry. I should be saying sorry. Her eyes waver and she turns her head away from me for a moment. This mess that I threw us into is too much.
I can’t help it. I feel tears forming in my own eyes. All the tension, frustration, fears and anxieties that I had suppressed these past few weeks come gushing out in the form of big, wet tears. I hurriedly wipe at them but they keep falling. I cry, I wail, I cough and splutter. I don’t try to stop crying now. I’m sobbing hysterically, my entire body trembling.
“Maki…I’m sorry…I can’t….” I barely manage to get out. She wipes my cheeks gently. All of a sudden she jumps up and I panic because I think she’s going to abandon me on her own doorstep. But she doesn’t. Maki hastily unlocks her door, pulls me up and manages to shuffle me into her entrance hall. She turns to close the door and I sink to my knees on the spot.
I hear Maki sniff before feeling her arms wrap tightly around me from behind, locking me in a fierce bear hug. Her strong hold on me makes me feel more secure. She rests her chin on my shoulder and her head against mine, letting me cry everything out. I bet I look really horrible right now; puffy red eyes, tears all over and hair stuck to my face. She doesn’t care though; she keeps holding me until I calm down a little. I feel like I’ve been crying for days because my chest throbs and my voice is hoarse.
After an indescribable amount of time, she stands up without letting go of me, pulling me up with her.
“Reina-chan…you must be exhausted,” she quietly says, her voice tinged with sadness. I want to cry all over again because she can only think of my well-being. Has she even had time to look after herself recently? I nod my head twice and keep my head hanging, ashamed of myself.
This wasn’t going how I planned. I was supposed to apologise and explain myself. Now I’ve made a bigger mess of it by breaking down. Maki finally lets go of me, takes my hand and turns in the direction of her room. I don’t move. I have no right to be treated so highly by her. She takes a step back closer to me and gently pushes my face up. I keep my eyes downcast. Maki wipes my cheeks dry and fixes my hair so that it’s no longer clinging to my face. I finally look her in the eyes. She’s worried, but she puts on a smile and motions her head towards her room. I shake my head in refusal and stare at my feet. I don’t deserve her.
Before I can protest, Maki scoops me up in her arms; bride and groom style, and carries me to her bedroom. I’m too weak to resist.
“No…wait…” I say tiredly. She doesn’t stop, and instead she gingerly kisses my forehead. I cling to her shirt and give up trying to stop her from taking care of me.
As she gently places me down on her bed, I give her a small kiss on the cheek to say thank you. She smiles and her eyes glimmer in the dark. We settle into a comfortable position; her arms wrapped around me and my head buried into her neck. She feels warm. From her rhythmic breathing I think she’s already fallen asleep, so she surprises me a little when she starts talking.
Maki tells me about everything that has been troubling her regarding me, about how she doesn’t know how to properly handle quarrels, and about how she doesn’t ever want to fight with me again. She says sorry for treating me like a kid, and somewhere inside the pit of my stomach stirs in guilt. She tells me that she’s scared of the day I leave her, to which I vigorously shake my head. She apologises for not taking the initiative to resolve things between us. She even talks about Miki and Aya (who I’ve come to call ‘Aya’ in my head recently, though to her face it’s still ‘Matsuura-san’), and how much they’re always helping to keep her on track when things get a bit rough.
She knows I’m listening because I nod or shake my head against her every now and then. Occasionally she lightly scratches the back of my neck, and it makes me feel bubbly inside. She keeps apologising for hurting me and all I can do is keep shaking my head against her. This whole thing wasn’t even her fault. I’m too emotionally drained to make any sense, so I stay quiet. After she’s told me everything on her mind, we lay in a comforting silence for a while.
“I would knock out the person who made you cry this much into unconsciousness, but I don’t really know how to beat myself up. Sorry,” she tells me and I laugh at her strange, Maki-esque way of looking at things. I peel myself away from her and lightly press my lips to hers. My stomach does flip-flops as she responds. It’s short and sweet. It’s enough for how physically and psychologically exhausted we are. I re-bury myself against her and think about when I can tell her all my thoughts.
I want her to know how I feel. I want her to know that it’s not her fault that we ended up like this.
-
Haha, no, didn't expect grenades and whatnot, this is actually kinda what I imagined, really, sweetly making up XD -takes back hardhat-Thank you XD Hurry up with the next chapter! -waves hand dismissively-
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Awww....*meltls* That was so sweet and cute. I was worried with this whole confrontation because, honestly, I had no idea how you'd write it. I'm curious as to how you had it originally planned. Anyways, good job! You made my morning with this post.
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One of those few people is Eri. She called me last night, her voice trembling with concern for me. I know why. It’s because… because she likes me in a certain way. She only shows that side to me when we’re alone, while in public she masks it quite well. I cringe at the thought, not because I think that it’s gross or anything, but because I can’t return those feelings to her, I can only leave her hanging. I don’t like hurting her like that.
awww, unrequited love, so sad!
poor Eri :cry:
As for the Reina/Maki make up... sweet :heart:
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wow....this chapter is just so sweet..the kind that just makes you go AWWWWWW~~:pencry::heart: XD
@goosefish: it's your own fault for telling us that it will help :P plus, since it's working, i'll try again!! :pencry::pencry::pencry: POST NEXT CHAPTER QUICKLY :pencry::pencry::pencry: :D
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Ahh! Resolution-ish-ness. Sorta! Okie then... *waits for next update*
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“Can you picture yourself romantically involved with Miyabi-chan? Or the Captain? Or any of the Berryz for that matter?”
That was er.... random :lol:
I couldn't imagine it, Reina with one of the H!PK XD
Nice writing there on how they made up. We need more Maki-Reina happy stuff :D
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goosefish is good at making me mushy :cry:
Nice chapter. Hope their relationship gets better with everything settled and sorted out. :)
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That was er.... random :lol:
I couldn't imagine it, Reina with one of the H!PK XD
Nice writing there on how they made up. We need more Maki-Reina happy stuff :D
You know, in a few years those kinds of stories will be all there are. :lol: Of course, they won't really be H!Pk anymore...
The last chapter was so sweet. :cry: So many people write the traditional broadway musical storyline of boy (or I suppose "girl" really in most of these stories) meets girl, boy gets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl again and they live happily everafter, but rarely is the final reunion so sweet and tenderly emotional. It portrays how kind at heart and loving they both are...
The quote of description of how Eri feels about Reina reminded me a little of my story... maybe our stories aren't totally different, after all. ;)
As with everyone else, I'm looking forward to the emotional (and happy? :)) ending! (if, of course, the ending is really coming soon...)
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Sorry everyone, I don't know when I'll be able to have the next chapter up. :evil:
Yuuyami: haha, fine. Take your hardhat back then! :P I can wear a beanie instead.
YoukaiChica: the orginal plan is something I will never reveal! :D
coachie: yeah, Eri gets no love these days [like in rokun's fic].
jafeijai: damn emoticon! *must resist* Haha, no seriously though, I'd post the next one up if I had time to properly put together my fruit salad of ideas for the next one. :doh:
rndmnwierd: yeah. keyword: sorta. ;)
lil_hamz: I can't imagine Reina with an H!P kid either. *tres to imagine* Nope, not working at all. :P
wordsworth: mushy! :cry: :cry:
rokun: yeah, Eri in both our stories need some love! And I still can't remember what I wanted to say about Eri and Reina in both our fics. :hammer:
Well, that's all for now. Just thought I'd let everyone know that I'm not dead yet or anything. :P :D
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lil_hamz: I can't imagine Reina with an H!P kid either. *tres to imagine* Nope, not working at all. :P
What about Maasa/Reina? XD
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What about Maasa/Reina? XD
I'd never thought about it before, but that would be kind of cute. XD
Well, it's been quite a while since I last posted a chapter. I HAVE been writing, the only thing is, I've been writing the wrong parts. I tend to jump all over the place when I think of something that would fit into the story. The result? I end up with gaps that I have to fill up. I already know where it's going to go and how it's going to end. But right now I have this HUGE writers block about how to write the next chapter. I've tried quite a few times and it just didn't work :evil: :evil: So I'll ask everyone to please have patience until something brilliant strikes me in the head.
In other news, I had a dream about Maki/Reina last night :oops: . Guess it's coz I was thinking too much about how to write the next chapter XD Since I don't have a chapter to post up, I'll leave you with the dream.
I don't know how or why, but Maki was having dance rehearsal for one of her tours in my school hall. Her dance teacher happened to be one of the PE teachers which I found very disturbing *shudders*.
Anyway, so here I was sitting on the stage watching rehearsals while Maki, Mako, Rika, Reina, Ai-chan and two girls who had no faces were on the floor. Yes, it was reversed for some reason.
Suddenly Ekizo na Disco started playing and they were all gyrating amongst themselves. About halfway through the teacher stopped the music and said they would do the second half in pairs and told Maki to pick a partner. Maki's instant reply: "REINA!" :heart: :tfr9a7wg: . At this Reina instantly latched herself onto Maki's arm and they stood they're with silly grins on their faces XD XD .
Rika had to be paired with the PE teacher which I barfed at.
So the music started up again and the PE teacher mysteriously disappeared [thank god!]. I tell ya, Maki/Reina doing Ekizo = :drool: + biggest nosebleed of the century. And Ekizo in my dream wasn't like the usual routine dance... it was more like sex on stage.
THE END!!
Well, I hope that provided some sort of amusement for somebody out there. Hopefully I'll be able to get something decent up soon!
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What about Maasa/Reina? XD
I'd never thought about it before, but that would be kind of cute. XD
Well, that 'ship is from the beginning of RP. ^^,,,
But that dream is hilarious! XD
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Poor Rika, lol. Take your time, we all understand writers block.
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goosefish, you have appeased me for now with your dream. And when it comes to writers block, the only cure is time! So take your time. Anything you write will be great no matter how long it takes you to post it.
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Well, it's been an incredibly long stint, and I have finally come up with something half-decent to post for the next chapter. Sorry for the long wait :evil: . So here it is.
Chapter 9
I toss and turn, blindly grasping at the air, unable to find that warmth that held onto me so securely during the night. Finally I realise that Maki probably had to leave for work. I replay last night’s events behind my eyelids. Once again, nothing had properly been resolved. Maki apologised for something entirely my fault, and that’s how it ended.
Despite not being able to fall asleep again, I still don’t want to open my eyes. I do though, and upon doing so, half my vision is obstructed by something ridiculously bright in colour. Lying there, I wonder (probably due to being half asleep) if I’ve somehow managed to contract a disease that makes people see in shades of pink.
Wait a minute… it feels like something is stuck to my head. Reaching up and pulling off the offending object, I see that it’s a fluro pink post-it note. What’s more, it’s been cut out in the shape of a heart. Maki’s so cute! How did it manage to stay stuck to my head while I slept? I smile stupidly at her and flip it over to see her rushed hand writing.
"Sorry, had to leave early for work. Breakfast and lunch are on the table so don’t go starving yourself!! Spare key is in the draw if you decide to leave (if you do, I’ll be sad)
Love, Maki"
My stupid grin grows even wider at her silly little message. I look a little closer and notice she managed to punch a hole through the paper where she signed her name. She drew a little arrow to it and wrote "Oops, I got a little too excited…" That dork! I wish she didn’t have to work today, but it can’t be helped.
I lie in bed for a few more minutes, reading and re-reading the little post-it note. Even though Maki’s not here, she has managed to make me feel giddy and bubbly inside. Still smiling to myself, I roll out of bed and head straight for the kitchen to see what Maki’s left for me.
I heat up the gorgeous looking and scrumptious smelling yakisoba that I find, and wonder where Maki learnt to become so adept in her kitchen skills. I tap the counter top, waiting for it to heat up and notice that she forgot her mobile phone here. Too bad… I wanted to message her… send her cute nonsense so that she would come back and tackle me in affection and smother me in kisses and… I blush as I almost think about where that could lead.
I flip open her phone and familiarise myself with its functions. I go to her message inbox and hesitate. Should I be doing this? Then again, what is there to hide between us, right? I let the little devil on my shoulder persuade me to take a peek. Her messages are mainly from H!P members. I randomly pick one from Miki and open it up. I gape. It’s a photo of me sitting in the common lounge room at work. I look so depressed here so it must have been from when Maki and I weren’t talking. I scroll down and read what Miki wrote.
"You can’t tell me that doesn’t break your heart. She doesn’t know, so how can she do anything to fix it?"
I feel tears sting my eyes but blink them back. Miki had tried to convince Maki to take the initiative before coming to me. I think about last night and wonder if it would be a good time to discuss things with Maki when she comes back from work.
I take the yakisoba off the heat and shovel some onto a plate. Taking my meal and Maki’s phone I head over to sit at her small dining table. As I chew the first mouthful I suddenly realise just how famished I am. I scroll through some more messages and stop when I come to an unfamiliar name. Nakagawa Ryuuichi. Come to think of it… I have seen this name somewhere before, but where? I open the message.
"I hope you find time in your busy schedule to read that book. Please be sure to keep up the medication."
I remember. It’s the person who sent Maki that book on stress. Maki’s doctor family friend. But what’s this about medication? I feel a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. Maki’s been taking medicine? What does she need it for? Why hasn’t she told me? Ugh. I need to stop jumping ahead of myself to conclusions that are just speculation. It’s probably for something minor… he sent her a stress book… so it was probably to help with her stress from work. I tell myself this several times in the hopes that I’ll stop thinking about it.
It doesn’t work.
I seem to have lost my appetite, despite being starving a few minutes ago. I look menacingly at Maki’s phone on the table, wishing that she hadn’t forgotten here.
I force myself to eat the rest of Maki’s yakisoba because I don’t want her to think that it tastes bad. It definitely doesn’t, but that’s what she’ll think if she comes back and sees that it was barely touched.
Great. Now I have this… thing just gnawing at my mind. Gnawing and gnawing until finally I decide to take a nap just to try and forget about it for a little while. I close my eyes.
Gnaw. Gnaw.
I toss and turn and get all huffy about not being able to fall asleep.
Gnaw. Gnaw.
I look at the clock. It’s been around 40 minutes and I’m wide awake as ever. I sigh and get up. Why am I feeling so anxious about this? It’s just stress medication. That’s all. Simple as that.
I let out a big groan. I’m not really convincing myself right now. I need to relax. If Maki sees that I’m troubling myself over something she’ll only go and blame herself again. We could end up in another mess and who knows where that could lead.
I decide to take a bath and sort everything out with myself. I shouldn’t need to worry about Maki hiding things. She shouldn’t have anything to hide. Then in saying that, I shouldn’t be hiding anything from her either. Ok, good. That’s a good start to sorting out my huge pile of thoughts.
I wonder if Maki has as many worries floating around in her head as I do. If she does, then I don’t want her to. I don’t want her to worry. I don’t want her to feel like she has to keep things secret from me. I don’t want her to be thinking so much that she needs to read books about stress and take pills for it. I just want her to relax and enjoy herself. I feel a tight pang in my chest and suddenly realise just how much I miss her right now.
No matter how many times I try to stop thinking about whatever it is she’s taking for whatever it is that she’s got ailing her, I simply can’t. I get antsy and fidgety here alone in Maki’s apartment. What should I do? I start pacing through her apartment. I pace from her bedroom through to her kitchen then around the living room. When I’m done with that I start at her bedroom and do this all over again. Four times. Bah.
It’s only roughly eleven in the morning and I’m bored beyond belief. Ok, so that was a lie. I’m not bored. I’m curious. Curious to know who this Nakagawa Ryuuichi is and what he’s prescribed Maki. I can’t stand being stuck here and wracking my brain on this any longer so I decide to return to my apartment. I know Maki wanted me to stay, but I’m not really sure how to face her after going through her messages.
Being at home doesn’t really help either. I sit and try to ignore it by watching a DVD. It doesn’t work and I end up switching it off half an hour into the movie. Why am I so worked up over this? It’s just stress medication right? Maybe not. The message didn’t say precisely what the medication was for. But if it was something serious then Maki would have told me… wouldn’t she…?
*****
"Just a second!" I yell as I rush to the door. Who would be visiting me at 10.30 tonight?
I rush through the living room and vaguely wonder if it might be some axe-wielding psychopath. I get to the door and take a second or two to catch my breath before opening it.
"Boo."
"Boo?"
"You’re supposed to be scared."
"Oh?"
"And scream for help, like in the movies."
I laugh at Maki’s strange greeting as I pull her into my apartment. I’ve only just managed to close the door and she throws herself onto me, almost knocking me over as she tightly wraps her arms around me. I laugh and hug her back just as tightly, forgetting anything that I was worrying about earlier - at least for the time being.
"I told you I would be sad if you left," Maki says as she navigates us towards my sofa, being careful not to make us trip and fall.
"I know. I’m sorry… I got bored there on my own," I apologise as we sit down. It was the half truth, and when she wholeheartedly bought it I felt guilt explode in my stomach. "So how was work?" I change the subject, not wanting to start thinking too much again. I practically hear her grin and look up to find that she has a mischievous smile plastered on her face. I raise a brow.
"It was… interesting. We ran through the choreography for my new single," Maki tells me and I can hear the excitement dripping out of her voice. It makes me smile giddily to see her so happy.
"Yeah? What’s it like? If it’s anything like Glass no…" I find myself unable to finish my sentence because Maki begins slowly running her fingers across the inside of my thigh. I blush profusely and clear my throat. Her hand stops and stays where it is. She focuses her eyes on mine and smiles again.
"They let me bring the tape home from practice… do you want to see it?" she asks me as she leans her head against mine, kissing my cheek. My heart flutters.
"Um. Yes. I do. Ok… you put the tape in and I’ll get us some drinks," I splutter out and hastily make my way to the fridge.
She’s in a very good mood tonight. As I pour some juice I wonder about her medication again. How serious can it be if she seems so carefree? Then again, she might just be covering it up… In any case, she’s in very high spirits and I’m not about to go and do or say anything that could ruin it for her. Whatever I might have to say can definitely wait for another time. Right now, I just want to enjoy being with her silly self tonight.
"Hey, it’s starting!" Maki calls to me. I bring over our glasses and snuggle into Maki as she hits play.
It begins with Maki goofing off with her dancers and I poke some fun at her for being so weird. She laughs and tells me I like it. It’s true and we both know it. They begin practicing the dance routine. At first I don’t notice anything special. Suddenly Maki bursts into some very provocative dance moves and I choke on my juice.
Maki immediately pauses the tape to give me a few thumps on the back as I feel the juice sting my throat and nose. Who choreographs Maki’s dances?! Her fanboys are going to have nosebleeds when they see this! I suddenly feel protective instincts kick in and I wish that other people weren’t allowed to see her like that.
I go the to bathroom to clean myself up and change out of my semi-wet clothes and into something a little more dry. I can hear Maki laughing like a maniac at me and scowl at her for being so… sexy. I bet she had this planned from the very beginning. Show me a video of her being extremely sexy and get me all embarrassed.
I’m finally ready and settle back down onto the couch again. Maki teases me a little bit before starting the video again. I decide that I shouldn’t be drinking anything while watching this. The more I watch, the redder my face becomes, the more heated I feel all over and the more I notice how close Maki really is to me. Finally the video ends. I’m not sure if that was an hours worth of agonisingly sweet eye-candy or sheer torture.
"Did you like it?" Maki asks me as she corners me against an arm of the couch. Since when did she discover that she likes teasing me so much?
"Uhun," I briefly answer and nod, lightly gripping the sides of her top.
"What did you think of the dance?" Maki questions as she kisses the side of my neck. I gulp and wonder why she’s bothering to ask anything right now.
"Uh…" I can’t seem to form anything coherent as she reaches my collarbone with her lips.
"You’ve got a day off next week. It’s the same day we’re shooting the PV. Come watch," she breaths against me as her hand crawls beneath my shirt.
"Ok," I reply without thinking. I’ll always give in to her. Whatever she asks for, I’ll give it to her. I’ll give her anything.
I react to Maki like clockwork. I arch against her, breathe against her, gravitate towards her. It’s almost agonising like this, yet oh so satisfying. Would she ever do such a thing to anyone else? Would she ever touch anyone else like this? Kiss anyone else like this? Love anyone else like this? Her body tells me no, and I feel her heart confirm it.
I greedily absorb all the love she channels into me. She’s showing me that she’s always right here for me. She’s showing me that I’m not alone. She lets me feel it all.
She takes me higher. She takes me so high above anything else that I’ll fall when she pushes me. And when I finally do fall she’s right here waiting to catch me and free me from anything that creates negative thoughts. She frees me from my fears, my worries, my anxieties.
She releases me into the purest form of bliss.
*****
2.53 am.
I’ve been awake for a while. Maki shifts slightly behind me before settling back into her deep slumber. Curled into her like this, I wonder if this would be happening more often. I flush as I remember what happened only a few hours ago.
That’s partly why I’m still wide awake… during the course of the night Maki had said something. It caught me off guard, it made me think more than twice. It almost made me stop what I was doing and just hide in a corner. But I didn’t.
"I wish we didn’t have to end."
The words she had breathed out against me stabbed needles into my ears. What did she mean "didn’t have to end"? Doesn’t she think that we’re going to last? For a while at least? I can’t stop thinking about it, and every time I’m about to nod off, it keeps coming back to taunt me.
It’s been one thing after another with Maki. First, the mystery medication and now this. Should I just come right out and ask her? I feel a tightening in my chest and realise that I would need all the courage in the world and more to ask her something so serious.
"Why do you have to be so complex?" I wonder out loud, and then instantly clamp my hand over my mouth. I hold my breath. What if Maki heard me? I lay as still as possible, wondering if she’s merely pretending to be asleep.
After a few minutes Maki slowly tightens her arms around me and sounds as if she’s coming out of her slumber.
"Did I wake you up?" Maki asks, her voice crackly from sleep.
"Huh? No, you were asleep, remember?" I reply, trying not to sound too awake. She’s stays silent for a little bit, still battling her tiredness.
"Then why are you awake?"
"Because… I like being like this with you. If I sleep then I’ll miss out on it…" I say quietly. At least it’s the partial truth. I really love these small moments together with Maki, where she’s just holding me… even if she is asleep. It’s a lot more than I get to spend with her on a regular day, with schedules like ours.
Maki responds with a satisfied chuckle and a kiss on the back of my head. I smile. Eventually her breathing becomes rhythmic and deep again, and I know she’s already fallen asleep.
"I wish we didn’t have to end."
What was she thinking? Maybe I’m just reading too much into it. I’m not sure she was really aware of what she was saying… in that state… at that moment. It could have meant absolutely nothing, it could have just slipped out, it couldn’t mean… it couldn’t really mean what the words are supposed to mean. Ugh, I’m beginning to go around in circles again.
"Reina-chan, you need sleep too, you know?" Maki’s sleepy drawl interrupts my thoughts. When did she wake up again? I reach down and blindly run my fingers over the veins on her hands as she draws circles on my stomach.
"I know. I’ll sleep now," I reply. It’s an honest answer. I really do need sleep, and I most definitely want to try and get that sleep, or I’ll be a wreck at work. Whatever Maki had said earlier should just be forgotten.
I’m sure it didn’t mean anything.
I’m sure.
I’m sure I want to be sure.
-
I flip open her phone and familiarise myself with its functions. I go to her message inbox and hesitate. Should I be doing this? Then again, what is there to hide between us, right? I let the little devil on my shoulder persuade me to take a peek. Her messages are mainly from H!P members. I randomly pick one from Miki and open it up. I gape. It’s a photo of me sitting in the common lounge room at work. I look so depressed here so it must have been from when Maki and I weren’t talking. I scroll down and read what Miki wrote.
"You can’t tell me that doesn’t break your heart. She doesn’t know, so how can she do anything to fix it?"
This was cute. I could never imagine Miki doing something like this but as long as it helps Gocchin and Reina its' good. :tfr9a7wg:
Hehe. Gocchin punching a hole on the note was funny. And she made sure that Reina would see it with an arrow :lol:XD
Nice to read your work again goosefish. :D
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Too tired to think, I think. Ugh, what?
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Hawt and suspenseful chapter :O
Maki doesn't have some disease that will ensure the end of her life at a young age, is she? :<
Nonetheless, love the implied sex scene. Now if only Reina was old enough, I'd love to see a perv chapter XD
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I'm so glad you didn't just abandon this stroy. Its so good, that would have been a waste. But, with this new chapter there are still more questions! And the time gap didn't affect the quality or style of it either. It was an awesome chapter. Very, very awesome.
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Ah, I've been following along this fanfic for a bit and finally decided to post, I really like it. ^^- And it's rare when I like a story in first person, but the way you write it, it's really wonderful. :D And a squealed at the latest chapter! XD I loved it, keep up the good work.
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hum..I'm not sure if I've commented on this story or not but I just wanted to say I love following this story! It's so indepth and has a lot of warmth and emotion :heart:
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. . . where do I start? Good stories always get better, so by the last chapter, I forget what I read earlier XD
But I do remember how awesome it was that Miki helps Reina and acts carelessly about it. That's awesomeness spelled out.
I definitely love the beginning of the 9th chapter! You described what any girl goes through while thinking of a great night/moment before.
-Maki being silly <3
-Reina being complex <3 and
What's REALLY weird is when I knew that there was implied sex scene, my PTA senses weren't tingling as much as the scene before. o_O
P.S. Boo. :D
-Owaranai_sLaVe
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Now that you've made your comeback Fishy san with inhuman, there's hope in the air ! :mon inluv:
*Does everyone a favor and nudges this thread* :mon misch:
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Yoohoo you're back!! And I didn't know until now *oops*
Since I've been out of the loop, I thought I'll ask this er... kinda dumb question. How did the popular Maki-Reina pairing come about? Not just here but in all Maki-Reina fics. Did it stem from Reina being a fan of Maki back in the day? Somebody please enlighten me *scratches head*
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Yeah, Reina was a big fan of Maki, and they had a futarigoto together <3 It seems more like an admiration, but I think that's what started the lovin' in the first place :]
If you're asking who was the first person who started the Reiki pairing, it's in Doki Doki, and then Goosefish and I came in with our fics, and my cousin Saikami with her fic. Yeah xD
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I HAVE RETURNED! (maybe :) )
Sukoshi: hope you say? Maybe there is :roll: Ok fine, so I read back on all my Sun chapters to try and get back into the swing of things. I dug through my old files and actually started the beginning of the next chapter. BUT NO PROMISES!! It might take a while because I've got a my hands a little full with moving places and work. Until I get settled in again, I won't be able to really concentrate on this :?
lil_hamz: yes I'm back! Haha, it's ok that you didn't know! Especially because I'm not that much of a huge poster, so it's understandable :yep:
Yuuyami: Thankyou for graciously stepping in and answering :P I actually had no idea who started Maki/Reina either, so it's nice to know now :-*
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YAY THERE IS A CHANCE <333 -glomps you- Did I mention how much I love this fic so far? -squee- I'll wait if I must, s'long as it's not forever, I suppose I can live. xD
-glomps you again-
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OMFG
*wipes off the dust that collected here*
I'm here to update with the next chapter!! XD
The chapter isn't awfully long and probably a little rusty seeming, but it's a start to get back in to the swing of things. Excuse me if the style changed a little... it HAS been... well.... a LONG while :sweatdrop:
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Chapter 10
Ugh... I can feel a thin beam of sunlight hitting me in the face. I keep my eyes closed and reach out, blindly searching for the curtains. My hand bumps something warm. I open my eyes and am greeted with Maki reaching up and drawing the curtains closed for me. As she lies back down and pulls up the covers around us, she gives me a sheepish smile. It’s at the moment my entire body feels like it flushes a shade of deep crimson.
As we lay there in silence, staring each other down, I wonder if those horrible words I heard were my imagination. Or maybe a dream. Or maybe – or maybe I just want it to be anything but reality.
“You’re a pervert,” Maki bluntly states. I blink. Then blush. Then stare. It’s so far away from what was on my mind that I’m caught off guard.
“What?” I question her. I want to laugh but at the same time, I’m too embarrassed.
“Do you want to know why?” Maki nudges me on to my back, and suddenly I find that I don’t care about what those words mean anymore.
What’s important is now. Now is Maki hovering a hair’s breadth above me, making my breath catch. Now is Maki grazing her nails against the skin on my arm. Now is where I’m supposed to be.
“No. Care to tell me?” I barely manage to rasp out. She puts her mouth beside my ear, as if she’s about to let me in on her biggest secret.
“Because only a pervert could’ve done the things you did to me last night.”
And everything else is completely forgotten.
****
“5, 6, 7, 8!”
We run through the routine for the thousandth time before practice finally draws to an end.
“Oh, Tanaka. Your schedule has been changed a little bit. You have dance rehearsal with Goto in two hours,” our dancing instructor informs me over the loud rambling of the rest of the members. I see Eri sidle up to me and she mischievously nudges me in the ribs.
“Ooooh. Morning Musume member Tanaka Reina suffers excessive loss of blood through the nose due to witnessing Goto Maki’s Glass no Pumps too up close and personal!” Eri imitates a news reporter’s voice and I immediately blush. Too up close and personal is what had Maki and I late and practically running to the studio earlier this morning. I shake those images out of my head. But god, it was extremely distracting.
“Go away, you!” I bark at Eri while still red in the face. She stares at me for half a second before bursting out in laughter.
“You liiiiiike her,” Eri teases. God she was awfully hyperactive today. In any case, what’s gotten in to her? Has she decided to give up on me? Do you normally tease someone about their love life when you have feelings for them? I decide to play along.
“So what if I do?” I puff out my chest and challenge her. Eri’s smile disappears and I know that she hasn’t cast away her feelings for me. I sigh and grab her arm, gently tugging her along. She looks at me, confused. “Come on, it’s been a while since we’ve hung out. Let’s go to the café.”
I didn’t really give her an option, so as soon as we’ve changed we head to the cafeteria.
“Eri… look, I - ”
“You two look good together,” Eri cuts me off with a strained smile on her face. She looks down and stirs her ice coffee.
I stare down at my own glass of cola. When had we gotten to this strange point in our friendship? Eri and I always had an attachment to each other from the beginning, and even when she began liking me I didn’t try and distance myself. I think I felt somewhat comforted about the fact that someone cared for me that deeply… it made me feel… I don’t know… I guess it made me feel special.
“I know you always belonged to her…” Eri said quietly, fiddling with her straw. “Just spending time with you everyday… it’s enough for me,” she stopped playing with her straw and began shifting uncomfortably in her seat. She looked close to tears and it tore me up inside that this was happening.
“Eri…” I was at a complete loss for words. She had all but given me her blessing. I wanted to cry as something wrenched roughly in my chest. If Maki had been in love with somebody else, would I be able to put on a brave face like Eri is now?
I really, really doubt it.
“So stop looking depressed! You have dance practice with her, and you don’t want her thinking that you don’t want to be there, do you now?” Eri tried her best not to let her tears fall, but it was too late. I felt like everything around me had come to a stop. Here was my best friend, ignoring her feelings and encouraging me to be with the person I care about most, trying her best not to let her emotions get the best of her… and all I can do is sit here and watch?
I stand up too abruptly and my chair tips backwards, the sound of it hitting the tiled floor echoes off the café walls. I don’t care, it doesn’t matter. I walk around the table to Eri and wrap my arms around her. Even though I can’t return her feelings, even though I can’t give her what she deserves… she’s my best friend and I make a silent promise to never let her down.
****
I push open the doors to the dance studio. Letting out a heavy sigh I spot Maki in the far corner. I was running late, but I wanted to make sure that Eri was alright before I left her alone.
“Hey, you. You’re late,” Maki greets me playfully before pulling me into a hug. I sigh again, but this time in contentment. With her touch, I feel as if I can just let go of any reservations and relax. Maki pushes me back gently and peers at my face, studying my features. “Bad day?” she asks me.
“Hm… Eri…” I trail off as I can’t find the right words to begin with.
“Um. No… my name’s Maki.”
The goose! I hit her on the arm and she laughs as she unsuccessfully tries to evade the attack.
“You know what I mean!”
Maki laughs even harder and pokes her tongue out at me. I try my best to glare at her.
“Ok, ok. What happened with Kame-chan?”
“She said we look good together,” I say bluntly.
“Um. And you disagree?” Maki asks as she grins widely. God, she makes me giddy when she gets this playful. Who am I kidding? She makes me giddy just by breathing air.
“No!”
This conversation was getting nowhere with her in this silly mood. Even so, I can’t find it in me to complain. I had been feeling a little under the weather from talking to Eri, but Maki being here with me has lifted my spirits. I beam stupidly at her as she rests her forehead against mine, and the few seconds Maki spends gazing into my eyes feels like our own private eternity.
“Reina-chan…” Maki says, and I hear her hidden question.
“She likes me, but she’s accepted us,” I tell her softly. “I just wish I could give her something more. She deserves more.”
“Come on now, I think she’s pretty lucky to have you by her side. She knows you want the best for her, and I’ll bet that means everything in the world to Eri. She knows you care,” Maki replies lightly into my ear.
This morning it seemed I had about a million worries plaguing my mind (I still haven’t forgotten about her medication or what she said to me last night). How is she able to make everything seem a lot brighter, simply by spilling words out of her mouth? I bury myself into her and sigh in contentment. I might want the answers to all my questions right now, but if I ask her about them, it’ll ruin this moment that I want to hold on to forever. Not only that, I’m afraid that I won’t be able to hold on to Maki forever.
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THANK GOODNESS YOU'RE BACK!! I've missed you and this story so much. I refused to give up on you or it. Don't ever leave again!!!!!
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Wow! It has been a long time since the last update... But the story's as great as usual! I do hope the updates keep coming... Good job :grin:
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Awwwww...poor Eri. :(
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-has blown up hell coming back to life with this-
WOOOO!
WOOOO!
Anywho xD.
I've never really thought about it before, since you never really put an emphasis on her, but I can see Eri slowly become more important to Reina as time goes on. I mean, I know Reina has GAM to fall on if she wants someone to talk to about Maki, but if she ever tells Eri the truth about her and Maki, then Eri would also be added to that list of support. Yaaay xD Or would she feel more jealous and possessive? HMMM.... Oh well, the story revolves around Reina and Maki along with their bumpy relationship, so I wouldn't imagine that you'd place outside forces to complicate things... ... yet... >.> .... <.< ....
-puts on hardhat- :x
xD Reiki was adorable waking up. Gotta love Maki and her smooth use of language, haha. And how Reina still manages to be naively innocent even though she isn't, roffle. I wonder how this rehearsal of their's is going to go. A rehearsal for moar pervs Glass no Pumps should be interesting xD.
-blows you a heart- ~<3
You better updaaaate~ <3
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Wait, now Eri's in the picture? Since when? XD
I think the Maki-Reina pairing is good, but poor Eri :cry:
Thanks for enlightening me with the Maki-Reina history folks :)
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YoukaiChica: HAha thanks! I'll TRY not to leave again :grin:
Grisours: yes it certainly has been a LONG while. I just hope I have the time and energy to keep this going!
JFC: naaawwh. Don't make me feel bad about doing that to her! :cry:
Yuuyami: ROFL at you and your comment about Glass no Pumps rehearsal :rofl: I won't say anything except that you can read for yourself what goes on in the next chapter. I'm almost done editing it, so expect it soon! And about Eri, my lips are sealed! *knocks on Yuuyami's hardhat*
lil_hamz: if by "in the picture" you mean mentioned, I think she was mentioned in a chapter a while back when Reina was in angst mode (god, that was AGES ago :sweatdrop: )
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Chapter 11
“Don’t forget about that little wrist flick, ok?” Maki reminds me.
We’re running through the dance routine for Glass no Pumps again. Initially, I had been extremely embarrassed about her teaching and watching me dance, but I’m gradually getting used to it. Maki turns up the bass as far as it will go, telling me it will help to keep the beat better. I burst into the opening steps as the song repeats itself, watching myself in the full length mirror, while Maki observes from the side.
There’s no denying it, the song was causing the heat to rise between us. Even after last night and this morning, she is watching me and practically drooling on herself. I like seeing this side of her, knowing that I can make her feel this way. The song plays out its last few notes and this time, Maki doesn’t let it repeat. She stops the CD player and hands me a towel and bottle of water.
“That was almost perfect, you just need a bit of fine tuning,” she says, obviously not really interested in that from the way she spoke. “I’ll run through it with you.” She takes away the bottle and towel, putting them on a table before standing directly behind me. I can feel the heat pulsating from her body.
She grabs hold of both my hands and steps in so that her body presses against mine. I gulp and can hardly contain my excitement. She begins to softly sing Glass no Pumps at an exaggerated slower beat, guiding my body to move in sync with hers. The sparks fly wildly as we get to the more sensual dance steps and I find myself wishing that she would never let go.
“Dance with me baby, baby… sawarimashou yo…” she whispers into my ear, drawing out the last two words. Our movements come to a gentle halt.
Maki spins me around to face her, our breaths already hot and ragged. Whether it was from dancing or something a little more desire filled, I’m not sure.
“Maki… someone might come in,” I breathe against her lips, sounding quite unconvincing.
She smiles deviously at me before covering my mouth with hers. We kiss, our tongues roughly caressing each others’ in a raging dance of desire. She pushes me against the cool mirror, though my skin is already too heated to feel the difference. Maki grinds her body forcefully against mine, and I wonder where all this… energy… came from. Oh, that’s right - the dance.
I grind back just as hard and we break away for a split moment before resuming our heated battle. I run my hands all over any part of her that I can reach. As we slide down the mirror, I end up sitting on the floor. She straddles me, and begins sucking at my neck. I can’t believe we’re doing this in the dance studio, but it’s too late to stop. Her hand slips underneath my shirt and her nails scrape my skin. My eyes roll back into my head at the sensation of her touch. Our grinding becomes more ardent, bodies arching impatiently against each other with more need and desire.
“Aaaaarghh!!!” the scream snaps us into reality and Maki jumps off me while I hastily pull my shirt back down.
“I can’t believe you two! You’re lucky it was me and not Tsunku!” Miki hollers at us. We were very lucky that it was Miki. I can’t imagine what would happen if anybody else had walked in on us.
Miki checks the hallway to see if there are any potential eavesdroppers before closing the door. She walks over to us and plops down in a chair, smirking at the state we’re in. I check myself in the mirror, my hair was a mess and my lips look slightly puffy. I bite my lip as I recall the ferocity in which Maki had kissed me with.
Maki and I look at each other, both blushing like mad at the realisation that we wanted each other so much. Miki laughs at us.
“You couldn’t wait until you got home?” Miki asks us, smirking while still trying to contain her amusement.
“Hey, we were practicing Glass no Pumps! Can you really blame us?” Maki defends us.
“Yeah Miki. Imagine if you had to learn that dance with Aya!” I suggest, and Miki thinks about it for a moment before a light blush covers her cheeks. She raises an eyebrow, lost in thought. I knew it! She would be just as turned on. After a few seconds she looks at both of us with wide eyes, like a kid with ten litres of ice-cream to plough through.
“Ok, I can see your point. It is quite… well… hell yeah!” she fumbles, not quite sure what to say. Maki bursts out in laughter, and soon I’m laughing just as hard. I hold on to Maki’s arm as I clutch my stomach, while Miki sits there and mock-glares us.
The studio door swings open and we instantly go quiet and hold our breaths.
“Oh, Miki-tan, I was looking for you. Tsunku wants to see us about GAM promotions in an hour.”
At the sound of Aya’s voice we all exhale in relief. As she walks over to us Miki looks at her with puppy-dog eyes.
“Aya-chan, how would you feel about learning the dance for Glass no Pumps together?” Miki asks her innocently, tugging at Aya’s sleeve. Maki and I try to stifle our giggles. Aya throws us all a suspicious look.
“You two! What kind of ideas have you been giving her?” Aya accuses Maki and I. We look at her as innocently as two people who were moments ago locked in raging desire could possibly look. Miki pokes her in the side, sending her shrieking and almost elbowing Miki in the head. Maki and I laugh at the both of them.
“What about EROS, then?” Miki tries again. I can hardly believe how different Miki becomes when Aya is around. She seems more at ease, more herself.
“I already know that one,”
“So you should teach it to me,”
Aya rolls her eyes at Miki, who is grinning like an idiot. I admit, the relationship that they have is adorable!
“Ok, fine. I get the point,” Aya says in defeat, playfully prodding Miki in the cheek. Aya turns to me, looking me up and down. “You! Why do you look so trampled?”
I blush insanely and look at Maki. She tries not to laugh, and takes hold of my hand, playfully swinging it back and forth.
“Oh, leave her alone. Reina-chan was working really hard on learning the dance for Glass no Pumps,” Maki explains.
Right. I looked trampled because I was learning a dance. Nothing else. I smile as I remember Miki screeching like a witch at us when she came in. Aya squeals as she sits down on Miki’s lap.
“Hey, Miki-tan… aren’t those two just… so cute together?” Aya gushes to Miki, who suddenly has an evil smirk on her face.
“Do you want to know what I walked in on them doing?” Miki asks Aya, her voice full of mischief. Aya raises a curious eyebrow at Maki and I.
My eyes go wide and my face goes bright red again. So does Maki’s.
“No… you didn’t… you did? ... how can… wait… HERE?!” Aya tries to ask us a million things at once. I’m so embarrassed that I bury my face in Maki’s back. I can hear Miki cackling.
“Gocchin, you’ve corrupted poor Tanaka-chan!”
“I have not!”
“I don’t believe you!”
“I haven't! Anyway, she wanted to!” Maki whines, defending herself and blaming me at the same time. The sneaky thing!
“Maki!” I cry out from her back. Miki’s laughter is getting increasingly louder and she has tears streaming down her face. Within seconds all four of us are in hysterics, unable to stop laughing for what seems like hours.
*****
“Oof!”
I throw myself upon Maki’s couch as she goes and showers. Today’s dance practice and that entertaining episode with Miki and Aya left me beyond exhaustion. It’s been a few days since I began practicing Glass no Pumps, but since Maki is the one teaching me, I seem to get awfully distracted.
Just as well, because I can still feel a few things strenuously gnawing at me somewhere in the deep recesses of my brain. Ugh. I hate thinking about it. I hate it when I try my hardest to not think about it, but it ends up being all I can think about. I should just stop beating around the bush and ask her! It can’t be that hard, can it? I’ll just casually bring it up. The medication… those haunting words…
No. Those words can wait for another day. It’d be too much to ask all that in one go… right?
I heave a sigh. I know that I’m desperately running away from an answer that might not even be correct. Why do I have this inane fear of the unknown? Because beyond the unknown is everything that I don’t know now. Beyond the unknown, Maki might not even be there. Beyond the unknown is something I absolutely dread facing.
I sound like an incredibly depressed, broken record.
I hear the shower taps being turned off and immediately sit up. I can do it. I can ask her. I just need to take it one step at a time… one question at a time…
I have to.
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Wow were they ever lucky! If there's anyone who can understand and sympathize with Maki and Reina, it's Miki and Aya. :yep:
Hellz yeah GAM is ubercute! :wub: Gotta love their wacky, nutty dynamic. :lol:
“Gocchin, you’ve corrupted poor Tanaka-chan!”
Hey, when you're in lurrrve, it's not such a bad thing. :)
I can do it. I can ask her. I just need to take it one step at a time… one question at a time…
Oh shit, she's really going to ask her about it. THIS is going to be interesting...and at the same time, it'll be scary because we don't know how Maki might react when Reina asks her, or how Reina will react to what Maki says in response. :O
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Yey for new chapter!
Yeah, they were extremely lucky that Miki was the one who entered the room at that time. Imagine what would have happened if it was somebody else? :-\
The parts with Miki/Aya and Maki/Reina are very cute, but I keep wondering about Eri (maybe she'll find someone else...). And about Maki's secret too... Let's see if Reina is brave enough to ask her! I'm curious about the answer, too. :grin:
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wow...just came back from vacation and am so happy to find 2 new chapters! Thank you for updating~! :inlove:
I feel so bad for Eri in this story but Reina and Maki really do make a cute couple. Reina's been avoiding the question for so long now...I think when she finally asks it's going to go all wrong...but then again that's probably a given...I'll have to prepare tissue in case this turns into a sad fic.
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I'M WORKING ON IT! I SWEEEEEAAAAAR!!!
*coughs* Just wanted to say that I haven't abandoned it again! Work keeps me away for periods at a time :banghead: A big thankyou to everyone who is still supporting Sun and has had the patience to sit through my (terribly) long absences :oops: :heart:
*collapses in exhaustion*
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I'll always wait!!!!! Except, I forgot to comment on the newest chapter.... The point is, I'm way too obsessed with this for my own good and I'll sit around forever just for the next part!
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yay for those osam chapters! :wub:
ganbatte goosefish! :cow: :cow:
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So I just started reading this (just finished the third chapter) and I already love it!!
I can't wait to have time to read the rest xD
EDIT: Ok so I didn't actually have time...but I read it anyways because I just really wanted to know what was going to happen xD
But I love it and I want more! Such a cliff hanger (but take your time =] )
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Chapter 12
“Are you hungry?” Maki’s question breaks through my depressing reverie and I blink several times, turning to face her before my eyes bulge. She was standing there in a towel, dripping wet and looking very… oh… I shake my head. Now is not the time to get distracted by her… sexiness… Gah! I shake my head again and promptly avert my eyes from her.
“Guess I’ll take that as a no,” Maki calls out as I hear her shuffling into her room to dress herself.
What am I thinking? I can’t be allowing my mind to wander like this. I feel my stomach violently tie itself into knots again as I remember what I’m supposed to ask her. I don’t want her to… I don’t know. I just don’t want us to fight again… Every time we do, I feel like I’m the worst person in the world for somehow instigating it.
Take one step at a time, that’s all I need to do. I feel guilt pounding at my brain cells. I never should have peeked at her phone, invading her privacy like that. I groan and bury my head in my hands. Why is this so hard?!
A hand places itself atop my head and I flinch, surprised by the sudden contact. I peek out between my eyes to find a concerned Maki peering down at me. Great, I’ve gone and made her worry before I’ve even opened my mouth. Maki takes a seat beside me, and I’m just about ready to smash my head through the television screen just so that I can evade doing what I need to do. Maki studies me for a moment, and as I watch her I can almost see the gears spinning and grinding behind her eyes.
What’s wrong?
Tell me what’s on your mind.
I want to help.
I’m positive this is what she’s hearing in her own mind as I allow myself to become entranced by the intensity in her eyes.
I’m sorry.
I’m worried about you.
I don’t want to lose you.
I respond internally, praying to whatever divine force that might be watching, praying that she can hear my unspoken uncertainties.
Maki’s eyes flicker. What was that? What did it mean?
“I don’t want to lose you,” she finally breaks the silence. I stare in mild surprise. She’s just repeated exactly what went on in my mind.
“Huh?”
“But it feels like you’re shutting me out… I feel like I’m being pushed away…” her voice quivers as her gaze intensifies. I continue to stare at her, mortified. Mortified because she feels that way. Mortified because I’ve been stupid enough to let it get to this. Am I losing her? No! I refuse to let that happen.
“Maki,” I say firmly, placing a hand on top of hers. I have to do this. I have to do this. I have to do this! She waits patiently for me to continue. I feel like my chest is being constricted beyond all means and like I’ve had quick drying cement poured in to my mouth. I swallow, and wince at how dry my throat is.
“I just feel like… I don’t know! I feel like you don’t trust me… like you don’t really like me…” Maki says exasperatedly. My hearts jerks violently in my chest as I shake my head.
It’s not your fault!
My mind desperately cries out. But she can’t hear it, idiot. Do you expect her to read your mind? You really are stupid. It’s no wonder she feels like she does.
I can’t tell how many parts of myself are talking at once, but they’re all berating me for my idiocy. How am I supposed to compete with all this excess noise in my head? I can feel all the suppressed frustration tightening around my chest and moistening my eyes. This has to be the worst moment to cry. I can’t. I can’t let myself cry again… not this time… not when I’ve done it so many times before… But it’s too late, the tears have shed themselves, sliding down my face. It’s too late to stop. I scrunch my eyes shut as I feel Maki’s arms wrap around me, confused as she may be. I can’t let this happen again. I can’t let things just remain unsaid and laying in the dark recesses of my mind. This is how our relationship fails. This is how I continue to fail. I refuse to fail again. I don’t want her to hurt anymore.
After a moment I gently pull myself out of her embrace, guilt tearing apart my insides. She looks at me, confused and concerned. I hastily wipe my face and try to calm down. Why am I so bad at this kind of thing?
“I’m sorry,” I barely manage to vocalise my apology, and my voice sounds all stuffy from crying. She sadly smiles at me understandingly. We sit in silence for a few minutes, and in that time I try and gather my courage. It has to be now. I take a deep breath to steady myself and strangely enough, I feel a wave of calmness wash over me as I capture her eyes with mine.
“I’m sorry that I worried you… I didn’t realise I was making you feel that way. I’m sorry because sometimes I don’t think about what I’m doing or saying, and I guess it hurts you…” I take a shaky breath and she nods at me, encouraging me to continue. How I wish this wasn’t so hard. “I do like you. A lot. A whole lot. Like… really, really, really like you… like more than anything else on this planet… more than anything else that I need to live… more than yakiniku…” I trail off quietly and feel my ears burn red. That has got to be the most stupid way to tell her how much I like her! The corners of her lips rise at my dumb confession, instantly making me feel on top of the world before I remember what I was supposed to be doing. I take a moment to recollect myself for what I’m about to confess.
“I’m sorry, because I read the messages on your phone when you forgot it at home,” I blurt out awkwardly and quickly avoid her gaze. “And I read one about you taking medication, and I got paranoid that there was something wrong with you and that you were keeping something horrible from me, and I know I shouldn’t have been going through your phone in the first place so if you want to be angry for that I understand and - ” I take a breath. “And I was just really worried because that doctor family friend person also sent you that stress book, and then I thought that maybe you didn’t tell me anything because you don’t trust me, and I sort of started thinking too much about it when I know I should have just asked you… and then you came to my place and we uh… well… we did… that… and then in the middle you said something and it made me more paranoid… and then I - ”
“OK STOP AND BREATHE!” Maki bellows, her eyes wide from trying to keep up with my sudden outburst. God, that had to have been the worst way I could have said everything. I squeeze my eyes shut, out of breath from trying to get everything out in one go. That was insanely stupid and once again I find myself burying my head into my hands. I wished I hadn’t said it like a moron. I wished I could do it all again. My head spins, and I’m not sure whether I feel dizzy from being out of breath, or from the realization that I had just revealed all my concerns in the most awful manner. My head continues to pound as the seconds slowly tick by.
Silence.
That’s all I can hear. That dreaded, awful silence that I’ve come to despise so much. The silence that means something unpleasant is about to take place. I wish I would stop screwing things up so much. I wish I was better at making Maki happy. I wish… I wish for a lot of things… maybe too many things…
“Reina-chan…” Maki says quietly. I finally force myself to look at her for the first time since starting my insane ramble. She’s fiddling with her hands, a warning that we’re both treading on very thin ice. I feel as if the very air we’re breathing is forcing me into the ground. Before I can think about anything further she throws her arms around me tightly. I sit there in shock, not quite understanding the situation. What is she doing? Why isn’t she being angry and yelling and screaming at me? I feel warm droplets on my head. She’s crying.
“Maki?”
Maki places both hands on my shoulders, giving them a gentle squeeze. She leans in and places a tender kiss on my forehead and then her arms drop back into her lap. I don’t understand. I have this impending feeling of ultimate doom in the very pit of my stomach. It felt like she was making a final movement, it felt like her kiss on my skin would be the last. Why did it feel like that?
I hear her take a shallow, shaky breath. My head spins for all sorts of reasons – there’s too many to count and keep up with.
I had just confessed to her all that had been on my mind as of late, and here she was not saying anything. I don’t get it. I can’t wrap my head around it.
“Maki? Can you talk to me? Please?” I practically beg her, vigorously wiping the tears from my cheeks, trying to regain some sort of control so that we can work through this mess. I look at her helplessly.
She’s not there. Her mind isn’t, at least. Her eyes have glazed over, she's just staring into the air before her. I can’t say enough times that I don’t understand what’s going on.
Maki eventually turns her head to look at me. No, I’m wrong. She’s not looking at me… she’s looking through me… looking beyond me. Wordlessly, she takes a hand in hers and rises to stand. I’m so confused that I can’t do anything but comply. It feels like I’m not there, like I’m a mere spectator. I couldn’t control the situation any more.
“Maki?” I timidly ask her as she leads me to the door. She hasn’t said a word at all, and now here she was dragging me to her front door. Is she kicking me out? Is she that angry? She could at least tell me what she’s feeling. I feel the tears build up in my eyes again, but I refuse to let them fall this time. “What are you doing? Can you just say something to me?” I plead and plead, but she doesn’t respond and continues walking, pulling me along.
We reach her front door. Maki picks up my bag and pushes it into my hands. For the first time in this short while, she looks at me. I’m taken aback by what I see.
It hurts.
The words echo in my head.
I don’t understand. I don’t understand. I don’t understand!
Something within in me snaps, causing me to pull back roughly on Maki’s hand. She stops walking, but doesn’t turn to face me.
“So you’re kicking me out now?” I ask, afraid of the answer. “You’re not even going to tell me that you’re angry, or that you hate me, or anything like that? You’re just going to force me out?” I continue asking her, trying to get some sort of response, any response. It’s not fair that she won’t say anything to me. I don’t understand what’s going on anymore!
“I’m not angry at you. I don’t hate you. But you have to go,” Maki finally replies in a small voice, almost as if she was pleading me, almost as if her entire life depended on it. Her hand tightens for a moment around mine, and then she releases my hand completely. I feel something inside me die.
She wasn’t going to tell me what was going through her mind. She wasn’t going to tell me how she felt. She was just telling me to leave. Just like that. I can’t believe it. How can she be so cowardly? How can she just let me leave without explaining herself? I felt my anxieties sink away as I’m overcome with irritation and some form of anger. How dare she kick me out after I had tried to help our situation. I don’t care. I don’t want to care anymore. Caring leads to pain, pain leads to suffering. Suffering is something I could do without.
Before I know it, the door closes behind me and I turn around to hear the lock being turned into place.
All we’ve ever done since coming to terms with our relationship is fight and had misunderstandings. Why couldn’t I hold on to her like I wanted to? Why couldn’t we just avoid all this commotion and go on happily in peace and happiness? Why was everything about us so wrong that whatever forces were up there were making us have issue after issue?
I felt everything warm inside of me turn into ice. I pounded on the door in frustration as hot tears rolled down my cheeks for the umpteenth time that night. Why wasn’t she opening the door? Why was she ignoring me? Why did she make me leave? She was making me feel worthless. I yelled out her name, yelled at her to talk to me as I continued pounding on her door. Maki continued to ignore it.
I don’t understand.
I wanted to hate her for making me feel this way. I wanted to hate her for shutting me out of her heart like this. I wanted to hate her with everything I ever loved her with. But I just couldn’t.
Everything became a blur after that. I vaguely remember somehow finding my way back home. I hazily remember crying and crying for hours on end until I fell asleep from pure exhaustion.
I don’t even understand why she had told me to leave.
I don’t understand any of it.
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No Maki NO!!!! :gyaaah: Don't do this to Reina!!!!! :pleeease:
Man that was intense. Poor Reina! I wonder what's wrong with Maki to make her want to kick Reina out. Hopefully this is all a misunderstanding or Maki just needs some time and they'll fix it soon.
Your story still rocks and can't wait for the next installment. :mon loveflower:
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“Are you hungry?” Maki’s question breaks through my depressing reverie and I blink several times, turning to face her before my eyes bulge. She was standing there in a towel, dripping wet and looking very… oh… I shake my head.
Asking your GF if she's hungry while you're nekkid, dripping wet, and in nothing but a towel. :shocked:
Maki doesn't realize the strength of her own "power". O0
Take one step at a time, that’s all I need to do. I feel guilt pounding at my brain cells. I never should have peeked at her phone, invading her privacy like that. I groan and bury my head in my hands. Why is this so hard?!
Well, there's the concern for Maki's well-being. Combine that with the guilt of looking at her private messages without her knowing (which doesn't exactly make Reina look trustworthy) and the fact that Reina's scared of how Maki might react when she actually asks her. Yeah, it's bound to make most anyone uneasy.
“I’m sorry that I worried you… I didn’t realise I was making you feel that way. I’m sorry because sometimes I don’t think about what I’m doing or saying, and I guess it hurts you…” I take a shaky breath and she nods at me, encouraging me to continue. How I wish this wasn’t so hard. “I do like you. A lot. A whole lot. Like… really, really, really like you… like more than anything else on this planet… more than anything else that I need to live… more than yakiniku…” I trail off quietly and feel my ears burn red. That has got to be the most stupid way to tell her how much I like her!
Well, considering how much Reina likes yakiniku, it should give a pretty strong indication of how she really feels about Maki. :)
I had just confessed to her all that had been on my mind as of late, and here she was not saying anything. I don’t get up. I can’t wrap my head around it.
“Maki? Can you talk to me? Please?” I practically beg her, vigorously wiping the tears from my cheeks, trying to regain some sort of control so that we can work through this mess. I look at her helplessly.
She’s not there. Her mind isn’t, at least. Her eyes have glazed over, she was staring into the air before her. I can’t say enough times that I don’t understand what’s going on.
Maki eventually turns her head to look at me. No, I’m wrong. She’s not looking at me… she’s looking through me… looking beyond me. Wordlessly, she takes a hand in hers and rises to stand. I’m so confused that I can’t do anything but comply. It feels like I’m not there, like I’m a mere spectator. I couldn’t control the situation any more.
“Maki?” I timidly ask her as she leads me to the door. She hasn’t said a word at all, and now here she was dragging me to her front door. Is she kicking me out? Is she that angry? She could at least tell me what she’s feeling. I feel the tears build up in my eyes again, but I refuse to let them fall this time. “What are you doing? Can you just say something to me?” I plead and plead, but she doesn’t respond and continues walking, pulling me along.
We reach her front door. Maki picks up my bag and pushes it into my hands.
...
Something within in me snaps, causing me to pull back roughly on Maki’s hand. She stops walking, but doesn’t turn to face me.
“So you’re kicking me out now?” I ask, afraid of the answer. “You’re not even going to tell me that you’re angry, or that you hate me, or anything like that? You’re just going to force me out?” I continue asking her, trying to get some sort of response, any response. It’s not fair that she won’t say anything to me. I don’t understand what’s going on anymore!
“I’m not angry at you. I don’t hate you. But you have to go,” Maki finally replies in a small voice, almost as if she was pleasing me, almost as if her entire life depended on it. Her hand tightens for a moment around mine, and then she releases my hand completely. I feel something inside me die.
Oh shit. :cry:
The shock of Reina finding out must have been too much for Maki to handle right now. Hopefully she just needs time to think and sort things out for herself.
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Ohhhh Guuuuchaaaaan~
:shifty:
Anywho xD... Forgive me for not commenting on your previous chapter, but it seems that you didn't do comment replies this time. Hmm. xD.
Poor poor Reina D:. So confused. Whatever's happening to Maki must be really big for her to be THAT much affected when Reina asked her about it. It's pretty much a trust issue just as Reina says it to be too. If Maki can't trust Reina about this whole stress thing she's been having, then how can they have the relationship they have now? A relationship filled with secrets isn't exactly appealing, and I'm sure Maki realizes that :< ... But hot damn, I wonder how Maki is going to cope with herself 'cause this time, SHE is the one who made a bad awkward move and thus, threw Reina into such confusion and temper.
Man, I wonder how they're going to fix this now. Through my perspective, it seems that it's all up to Maki to tell Reina when the time comes. Reina will have to do the part of waiting, even though she will be very impatient.
I look forward to the next chapter, Guchan~ <3
Well, Guchan instead of Goochan because then that'd be pronounced go-oh instead of gu, roffle xD Hope you don't mind
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Poor Reina. There wasn't a good way of telling Maki that she figured out those things, so Reina shouldn't blame herself. Now it's Maki's turn to decide what she wants to do and act. I hope she gets things figured out, with a little help from Reina, obviously.
Keep it up! :yep:
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Awwww Maki why'd you do that!!!
*cries*
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No Maki!! NO!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!??!! God. This chapter just ripped out my heart! It has to be a misunderstanding. It just has to be. You know what we need??? GAM! We need them to be the superheros and to rescue these two, lost lovers. Go GAM, GO!!!
By the way, this story just keeps getting better and better. Every chapter outshines the last and the way that you build suspense is just amazing.
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Man, this was painful! :cry: Poor Reina, she's just wants to help!
Damn Maki! Get it in your head that she's just looking out for you! You've just let the best thing ever pass you. No, my bad, you KICKED IT OUT OF YOUR HOUSE! :angry1:
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No Maki NO!!!! :gyaaah: Don't do this to Reina!!!!! :pleeease:
Man that was intense. Poor Reina! I wonder what's wrong with Maki to make her want to kick Reina out. Hopefully this is all a misunderstanding or Maki just needs some time and they'll fix it soon.
Your story still rocks and can't wait for the next installment. :mon loveflower:
Misunderstanding or not, these two have had issues with communication and trust from the very beginning. It's gona be a tough one to get through :bleed eyes:
“Are you hungry?” Maki’s question breaks through my depressing reverie and I blink several times, turning to face her before my eyes bulge. She was standing there in a towel, dripping wet and looking very… oh… I shake my head.
Asking your GF if she's hungry while you're nekkid, dripping wet, and in nothing but a towel. :shocked:
Maki doesn't realize the strength of her own "power". O0
Take one step at a time, that’s all I need to do. I feel guilt pounding at my brain cells. I never should have peeked at her phone, invading her privacy like that. I groan and bury my head in my hands. Why is this so hard?!
Well, there's the concern for Maki's well-being. Combine that with the guilt of looking at her private messages without her knowing (which doesn't exactly make Reina look trustworthy) and the fact that Reina's scared of how Maki might react when she actually asks her. Yeah, it's bound to make most anyone uneasy.
“I’m sorry that I worried you… I didn’t realise I was making you feel that way. I’m sorry because sometimes I don’t think about what I’m doing or saying, and I guess it hurts you…” I take a shaky breath and she nods at me, encouraging me to continue. How I wish this wasn’t so hard. “I do like you. A lot. A whole lot. Like… really, really, really like you… like more than anything else on this planet… more than anything else that I need to live… more than yakiniku…” I trail off quietly and feel my ears burn red. That has got to be the most stupid way to tell her how much I like her!
Well, considering how much Reina likes yakiniku, it should give a pretty strong indication of how she really feels about Maki. :)
I had just confessed to her all that had been on my mind as of late, and here she was not saying anything. I don’t get up. I can’t wrap my head around it.
“Maki? Can you talk to me? Please?” I practically beg her, vigorously wiping the tears from my cheeks, trying to regain some sort of control so that we can work through this mess. I look at her helplessly.
She’s not there. Her mind isn’t, at least. Her eyes have glazed over, she was staring into the air before her. I can’t say enough times that I don’t understand what’s going on.
Maki eventually turns her head to look at me. No, I’m wrong. She’s not looking at me… she’s looking through me… looking beyond me. Wordlessly, she takes a hand in hers and rises to stand. I’m so confused that I can’t do anything but comply. It feels like I’m not there, like I’m a mere spectator. I couldn’t control the situation any more.
“Maki?” I timidly ask her as she leads me to the door. She hasn’t said a word at all, and now here she was dragging me to her front door. Is she kicking me out? Is she that angry? She could at least tell me what she’s feeling. I feel the tears build up in my eyes again, but I refuse to let them fall this time. “What are you doing? Can you just say something to me?” I plead and plead, but she doesn’t respond and continues walking, pulling me along.
We reach her front door. Maki picks up my bag and pushes it into my hands.
...
Something within in me snaps, causing me to pull back roughly on Maki’s hand. She stops walking, but doesn’t turn to face me.
“So you’re kicking me out now?” I ask, afraid of the answer. “You’re not even going to tell me that you’re angry, or that you hate me, or anything like that? You’re just going to force me out?” I continue asking her, trying to get some sort of response, any response. It’s not fair that she won’t say anything to me. I don’t understand what’s going on anymore!
“I’m not angry at you. I don’t hate you. But you have to go,” Maki finally replies in a small voice, almost as if she was pleasing me, almost as if her entire life depended on it. Her hand tightens for a moment around mine, and then she releases my hand completely. I feel something inside me die.
Oh shit. :cry:
The shock of Reina finding out must have been too much for Maki to handle right now. Hopefully she just needs time to think and sort things out for herself.[/size]
Hehe, I love your little commentary on some of the parts I wrote. It lets me get a feel for what you're thinking after reading this or that particular bit :)
Ohhhh Guuuuchaaaaan~
:shifty:
Anywho xD... Forgive me for not commenting on your previous chapter, but it seems that you didn't do comment replies this time. Hmm. xD.
Poor poor Reina D:. So confused. Whatever's happening to Maki must be really big for her to be THAT much affected when Reina asked her about it. It's pretty much a trust issue just as Reina says it to be too. If Maki can't trust Reina about this whole stress thing she's been having, then how can they have the relationship they have now? A relationship filled with secrets isn't exactly appealing, and I'm sure Maki realizes that :< ... But hot damn, I wonder how Maki is going to cope with herself 'cause this time, SHE is the one who made a bad awkward move and thus, threw Reina into such confusion and temper.
Man, I wonder how they're going to fix this now. Through my perspective, it seems that it's all up to Maki to tell Reina when the time comes. Reina will have to do the part of waiting, even though she will be very impatient.
I look forward to the next chapter, Guchan~ <3
Well, Guchan instead of Goochan because then that'd be pronounced go-oh instead of gu, roffle xD Hope you don't mind
Guchan!! You spoil me! XD :lol:
You've picked up on a key point there: trust. Without trust a relationship can't progress, let alone be a REAL relationship. If you can't place your trust into someone, then you can't give yourself to them completely. These two need to sort themselves out!!
Poor Reina. There wasn't a good way of telling Maki that she figured out those things, so Reina shouldn't blame herself. Now it's Maki's turn to decide what she wants to do and act. I hope she gets things figured out, with a little help from Reina, obviously.
Keep it up! :yep:
True, I think no matter what way Reina told Maki about those things, it wouldn't have ended pleasantly.
Awwww Maki why'd you do that!!!
*cries*
You'll find out all in good time, my friend. All in good time 8)
No Maki!! NO!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!??!! God. This chapter just ripped out my heart! It has to be a misunderstanding. It just has to be. You know what we need??? GAM! We need them to be the superheros and to rescue these two, lost lovers. Go GAM, GO!!!
By the way, this story just keeps getting better and better. Every chapter outshines the last and the way that you build suspense is just amazing.
Hehe, don't worry! I haven't forgotten about GAM!! *loves them too much*. They'll make themselves known again when the time is right :roll:
Man, this was painful! :cry: Poor Reina, she's just wants to help!
Damn Maki! Get it in your head that she's just looking out for you! You've just let the best thing ever pass you. No, my bad, you KICKED IT OUT OF YOUR HOUSE! :angry1:
I guess Maki just doesn't realise what exactly she's doing to Reina by asking her to leave... :cry:
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Drats I shouldn't have read this after the kameshige chap in unwholesome bond....now I'm back to :cry:
Maki is sooo hiding something for kicking Reina out at a time like that! :shock: GaH! Darn you Maki! :farofflook:
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sooo I decided I like this story a lot :gmon love: :gmon love2: .... and because of this I'm bumping it because I think this deserves to be on first page and because I NEED to know what happened here the last chapter was a total cliff hanger does Maki have some kind of incurable fatal disease and doesn't want to burden Reina or get too close :gmon tears:.... or have I been watching way too much doramas :gmon blonde:.... new chapter please :mon pray2: I'm an addict I might die from withdrawal and you wouldn't want that on your hands