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Author Topic: Promised Love On HOLD  (Read 3722 times)

Offline kuro808

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Promised Love On HOLD
« on: February 05, 2011, 01:03:53 PM »
I am almost done with the first part of the "Hooded Woman" series and maybe with a little inspiration I came up with this

Chapter 1

Eri looked outside with the blue ocean as her only entertainment, despite the movie was semi interesting and seeing it for the nth time.  She looked over at the family with the kids smiling at their parents as they were anxious to land in Hawaii

However, Eri had another reason...

“Eri, I cannot stand you being in that juvenile hall every single day, why do you torture me?  You have intelligence and yet you don't use it, you rather hang out with your friends and enjoy the day outside of school and when you run into the police, you lie to them.”  Her father capping another rageful speech to Eri.

“Eri-chan, your father is trying to hold up his end by bailing you out.”  Her father pushed her out of the way to get in her face.

Eri slapped him with her open palm and right before he was ready to strike the mother held his arm back as he was ready to yell at her.

“I took out vacation money and I am going to send you out to Hawaii.”  Eri tilted her head.

“I have a brother who needs some help with his house and since you got suspended again, I had requested that you needed an indefinite leave of absence.” Eri stood up and clenched her fist.

“WHY?  Why send me out to Hawaii?  I cannot stay home with my friends, because I got suspended and my intelligence hasn't help me.  I get yelled at for not paying attention, so why should I listen to them.  If this is punishment, why make it easy for me?”  The father smiled.

“Well, it leaves in couple hours, pack up and I will take you to the airport.”  Her father and mother walked to the car as Eri packed her briefcase.


The plane descended down onto the runaway and eventually stopped to let the passengers off.  Eri slowly got out of her to stretch out and got to the gate seeing a medium-built man with a long black beard and salt and pepper hair.

“Eri, give your uncle a hug.”  Eri hugged as she smelt the stench of sea water and sweat.

“Sorry, I was a little busy with fishing that I forgot to shower.”  He put his hand behind his head in embarrassment as Eri went to the baggage terminal.  He followed her with himself feeling the cold of the morning in the airport terminal.  He warmed his arms as he waited and then heard his phone ring.

“Hello.”

“George, did Eri arrive yet?”  Hearing the voice he knew his brother would be worried.

“Yes, your daughter is here, safe and sound.”  He turned to find Eri had a running start and flipped the phone back as she ran toward the security guard and gave him a smile.

“Hey George, you up early, eh?”  The security guard punched him in the arm.

“I always up early, brah fishing for my dinner not like you hamburger steak and rice every day.”  Both laughed as he turned it over to the uncle.

The uncle instead of getting angry, he smiled to the truck, and stepped in as she crossed her arms and looked outside at the hazy, cold morning of Honolulu.  Eri did not know of her father's brother as they rarely saw each other.  Her father confessed that both usually got into a lot of fights and drove them crazy. Her father traveled to Japan for college while he stayed here becoming a utilityman and letting him reside in Haleiwa up on the North Shore.

“You don't look like a girl who causes trouble, eh?”  He tried to break the ice.

“C'mon, I am not your father, he wants you to be well-educated and I am here to make you stretch out your wings.”  Eri looked outside as she saw the housing communities in the area.

“My... dad.... doesn't like me.”  Eri said in a soft voice.

“He loves you, he just wants you to be better.”

“Why does he yell at me?”

“That's him, he was always the authoritarian, he has to set down the rules straight, while I flirted with them a lot and he always gets angry when stuff goes wrong.”  Eri looked over at her uncle.

“What are you going to make me do here?”  Her uncle let out a deep sigh.

“Anything you want, I am going to just monitor you like my own daughter.”  He finally got to the scenery of the ocean as Eri cracked a smile.

Eri liked the ocean a lot but her father was always aware of all people causing her to feel ashamed of her visits and usually not touching the water always solved the problem.  Especially the guys who loved staring at her in a bikini which made him furious. 

Eri realized that the truck was slowing down and saw the sign welcoming them into the town and as they passed by people Eri crouched down in her seat as all the people warmly greeted her uncle. 

“Hey uncle, welcome back.”  As the shop owner flashed a shaka at him.

“Ho uncle, this your niece.”  The surfer pushed his hair back and winking at Eri as she hid her face from them and a lady came from the crowd to clear the path for him and with a glance she noticed her tan skin and her shoulder length hair.

He turned left into his garage and she looked out seeing the blue ocean and the waves crashing onto the beach.  The uncle opened the door and let her in as she observed the place for a bit.

“Eri, you look tired, you can rest up in the guest room, while I make it more comfy for you.”  She traveled down the hallway into a room with the slight breeze blowing in.  She jumped onto the bed as she closed her eyes.

This seems nice... I hope
« Last Edit: April 23, 2011, 08:36:47 AM by kurosawa87 »
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Offline kuro808

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 2 2/6
« Reply #1 on: February 06, 2011, 04:42:20 AM »
Chapter 2

Eri stared up at the ceiling as the day slowly past by with her uncle waiting for the rice finish cooking, she never noticed how Hawaii was warm and the perfect day was just going by recovering from the long plane ride.  Eri walked over to the desk where it had the view of the ocean and all the pieces of paper scattered on top.  She found one to be amusing,

Dear George,

I can't believe she has become a teen already, remember our sister being herself at that age, she was quite calm until she got her period and kicked ass in the judo tournament.  Those were good times, she could throw us everywhere along the mat and because we towered over her, she took us down quick.  Anyways, how have you been keeping up?  Seems your business have been booming because of the tourists, eh.  While I am stuck in Japan with my wife and daughter trying to keep my job afloat, I was guaranteed a promotion but they past over me, I may quit at the end of the year if I get past up again.  So, I hope you find a wife soon and get your kids, well shoots then.

Your brother,
Michael


“Your father cared about you a lot, it took him a long time to decide on what to do with you, but going with instinct and the community, I gave him advice.  It seemed it was successful for a while and then you got arrested again.  He was left with a choice of rehab or here and since he had very little money, I chipped in to get you here.”  Eri looked back at the letter.

“This is a lie, he scolded me constantly for being late and drinking and smoking, he would never say that to my face.”  Eri thought as she put down the letter and laid back down on the bed.

“Anyways, I got food for you on the table, you can go eat and have fun outside.”  He smiled and walked back to front of the house.

Eri instantly got up and walked over to the table with rice steaming from the pot and a bowl of mysterious meat.  She looked toward the door, seeing her uncle's face gleefully looking at the table filled with what he had.

“In case you was wondering, that is Portuguese sausage, it is smoked and made from pig parts.”  Eri touched it with the chopstick and tried to cut it but it was too tough to break apart.  Eri took the piece and placed it in her mouth as the spice got to her instantly.  She ran over to find a glass and filled it up with water, she swallowed the piece of meat and tanked the glass.

“Eri, you are way too funny, it isn't raw fish, just bite into it and place it back down.”  Her uncle walked out to the driveway seeing the neighbor walked by with her dogs.  Eri scooped her rice and slowly ate as she watched her uncle conversing with his neighbor.  Seconds later, they walked over to the front door and saw the elderly woman wave at her.

“Eri say hi to aunty Meg.”  Eri waved as she continued eating her food.

She began to notice after a while the quiet time was becoming noisier with the people invading the house causing her to feel uncomfortable.  Then, coming from the back was the girl she saw on the drive and found herself embarrassed by her appearance that she tripped on her way to washing her bowl.  The crowd started to laugh as she sped away from the scene.

“You guys are lolo, making her run away, get out of here.”  The girl chased them away as she interrupted the uncle's conversation with the neighbor.

“Uncle, can I go talk to her?”  She asked.

“I guess you can but she doesn't have great English so be patient.”  She nodded and walked in to find her hugging her pillow.

“Hello....”  Eri looked up seeing her by the door and she turned over to find herself falling off the bed.

The girl lifted Eri to her feet and sat on the bed couple of feet away from her.  She scooted closer, seeing Eri was getting close to running out of space as she pulled back and walked away.

“Wait!”  Eri said in a soft voice.

“Whazzup?”

“I'm sorry but I am not a talker.”  Eri bowed toward her as she held her up.

“I don't blame you, because I was like that when my mother brought me out here, I never spoke until your uncle came up and gave me some dessert for my family.”  Eri sat back down on the bed as she held her head down.

“Anyways, my name is Risa Niigki, everyone calls me Risa or Lisa because Lisa is more common here.”  Eri smiled as she lent out her hand.

“My... name... Kamei Eri.  Nice... to... meet you.”  Eri said slowly.

“Ah Kamei, hmm if it serves me right, your name means turtle, right?”  Eri nodded.

“Well, I call you Kamei and if you don't mind?”  Eri smiled as Risa walked out of the room

Eri laid back again as she felt the weight off her shoulder, it was the first time that someone actually greeted her without fear in a while.  Before she was sent to a juvenile detention, she had a girlfriend who she always stick by.  She swore to never be away from her despite the father's warnings, she always stayed out and be with her.  Blindly, she held onto the loot from their robberies and was always caught red-handed, however she would bail her out and praise her for being a team player.

“Eri has made a new friend.”  Her uncle laughed.

“She is quite outgoing and always hanged out with the guys a lot, unfortunately she dropped out and caused her parents grief for not completing school.  So, she was left here alone with the people as she stayed in the house, luckily for us for letting her stay here as she helped around the neighbors, maybe you can be like her.”  Eri turned her attention toward her uncle.

“I just want to rest.”  She said bluntly.

“Tomorrow, you get to help her out running the tourist stand, many tourists come out here, and Risa had lost her Japanese hanging around us, so if you don't mind, we can spend today either staying here or tour the town.”  Eri gave out a sigh and followed her uncle out into the street.
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Offline oddball

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 2 2/6
« Reply #2 on: February 07, 2011, 01:14:29 PM »
Eri as a Yankiii?!?  :lol: now that's an intresting idea

seems as though perhaps Eri's dad cares for her alot more that she realized, or that her would let on to her.....

So the whole fic is in Hawaii, hmm definatly and intresting twist, looking forward to more!

Offline kuro808

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 3 2/12
« Reply #3 on: February 12, 2011, 01:09:47 PM »
@oddy supposedly she is, but that will be answered along the way

Chapter 3

Eri looked around as the streets were packed for spectators looking at the surf out on the beach, it seemed to fit perfectly with the image of paradise.  The crest haunting the brave surfers as they fly through tube and raising their hands in excitement before plunging into the blue ocean.  She found herself lost in the crowd with the locals and pushed into a shop where her uncle was talking to the owner.

“Here she is, this is my niece, Eri fresh from Japan.”  The man smiled with the very few teeth he had in his mouth and walked over to the ice machine.

“I am Jimmu, but everyone knows me as Jimmy or shave ice man.”  Eri watched him packed the ice particles into a cone and slowly drizzle the red, yellow, and blue flavoring over the cone and drizzle a little condensed milk from the bottle over the ice and handed over to her.

“Thank....you...”  Eri grabbed the small wooden spoon and dug a piece out with a bit of the condensed milk, instantly putting it into her mouth.  She had an instant reaction of excitement with the taste surprising her.  She walked outside to find a bench and took a seat by two girls as they were finishing their cones. 

She cracked a smile as she dug into it more with the sight of the big waves as her entertainment, the surfers sticking their chests out against nature's wrath with most succeeding and the failures surviving the waves.  She soon quickly realized in her daydream that shaved ice don't last long and the melted puddle overflowed the cone, landing on her lap.  Eri quickly took a sip of the melted ice and the taste intensified with the pleasure of the warm weather and nice sight.

“Eri, okay let's get you cleaned up.”  Eri drank the last bit before throwing the paper cone away.

Eri ran into the room and closed the door behind her as she looked for a change of clothes but realized she didn't unpack, so she just looked for the first thing, and it was a yellow dress.  She stripped down to her underwear and walked over to the sink.  She turned on the water and something came into her mind.

“Let's clean you up.”  Eri saw the cut across her thigh as it started to bleed slowly down her leg.

“Thank you, Reina.”  Eri and Reina's gang got paper towels to wipe up the wound before taking her to the infirmary.

The group walked knocking away any student in their way as Reina led the way to the nurse, as they dropped her off.  Reina watched Eri as she was being treated for the wound and luckily for the nurse to have a fresh supply of gauze as she wrapped it tightly around the wound.  Reina never liked the sight of blood but for a friend she had to withstand her fear.

Eri stood up and walked slowly toward Reina as she got her motion back to normal and followed Reina into their hideout.  Eri reached into her blouse and pulled out a gold necklace to place it on the table as they were amazed by the prize.  Eri walked away from the table and sat on the couch as she felt the pain in her leg again.

“Good Job, Eri!”  Everyone said as Reina looked into her eyes.

“You are getting closer and yet no one would ever predict that you be able to steal his necklace from him.  You are incredible....”
She phased back into the present.

Eri saw the scar it had made that day as the reminder of her sacrifice to Reina as she could just reminisce their time together.  It also reminded her of what brought her here and washing off the sticky  areas with a towel and water before changing into the dress.  She dab it in the water and wiped it as it spread and eventually the stickiness went away.

Eri dropped the towel by the sink and hopped into her long yellow dress with flower prints, she opened the door seeing her uncle talking to the police.  She hid behind the door as he told her to come out and slowly walking over, she thought she was going back for something she did.  Carefully, she looked at the uncle and then outside to find a boy in hand cuffs struggling against the police.

“Eri, you look so beautiful.”  Her uncle praised with a smile on his face.

Eri walked by the policeman and saw Risa standing over by the beach as she saw the guy being forced into the back of the car.  Risa looked at her with a weird expression as it didn't seem to be the normal dress of the beach.  Eri looked around to see what Risa was trying to indicate to her before Risa stopped her from getting dizzy.

“Nice.... dress?”  Risa said quietly.

Thank.... you...”  Eri said with her best English.

With her uncle occupied, Eri decided to follow Risa around the shoreline as she looked down at the beach with her brownish hair flowing in the light breeze.  Eri stood still as she admired the beauty before shaking it off and finding a small shell.  Risa turned to find Eri entranced by the shell and just let her play with it.

Eri looked up to find Risa inches away from her and fell onto her butt as Risa giggled from the shocked girl.  Risa picked her up and dusted her off as Eri grew red from embarrassment.  She turned to hide her blushing face from the girl as Risa tried to figure out Eri's problem and with a simple glance she saw the red cheeks.

“You don't like getting dust off?”  Risa asked.

“No... I mean yes, um I don't know.”  As Eri began to break down.

“Don't worry, I am your friend, we do these things for each other, unless you like getting touched on the butt.”  Risa whispered as Eri began to smirk.

“Thank... you...”  Eri wrapped her arms around Risa as Eri's uncle came toward them.

“Thank you, Risa, go home, I think we had enough to do today.”  Eri waved as she followed her uncle back to the house.

She looked around to find everything in its place but her uncle seemed to be stressed as she sat down across of him.  He tried to crack a smile but visibly was in thought as he got up and looked at the afternoon surf.  He breathed in and out a few times before turning back to Eri as she sat there patiently.  Eri wanted to help so she grabbed a broom and swept a few places before catching his attention but it was no use as he not him anymore.  Eri walked up to him and looked into his eyes.

“What... is... wrong?”  She asked.

“I cannot explain it to you, it is beyond your comprehension.”  He responded.

“Tell.... Me.... You... Look... Worried?”  Eri replied back.

“Okay, he got caught stealing fruit from the stand but there was no proof because they were chasing him and caught him right at my doorstep as he tried to explain but because of his previous record, he is going to jail.”  He rubbed his forehead a few times as he looked at Eri.

“I... see.”  Eri looked away as she just sat there pondering what was on his mind.
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Offline oddball

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 3 2/12
« Reply #4 on: February 14, 2011, 12:07:00 PM »
Seems as though that even if Eri is now in Hawaii she cannot quite escape from her past.... I wonder why Eri's uncles was so worried about the theif, was he also worried that it was Eri who had done something wrong?

Offline kuro808

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 4 2/15
« Reply #5 on: February 16, 2011, 10:54:34 AM »
@oddy: the uncle is a very caring person, especially family, he has a role of "uncle" throughout the whole story of all the kids and he fears anybody ruining them.  I created this character to make it seem that the connection between all are community-like and also I know many words that will come up will make little sense so I might point it out later.

Chapter 5


Eri walked into the room and closed the door behind her, she jumped onto the soft bed as she started to think about Reina.  Reina was the only person who really understood Eri, Reina was not always the bad influence that cost Eri.

Both met each other ten years ago as young girls getting themselves accustomed to the elementary school.  Eri was quite athletic while Reina developed her intelligence and both helped out each other until one day in middle school.

“Reinya, where were you?  I wanted to ask you about math class.”  Eri turned her head to the side as she saw a strip of brown on her head.

“I was just walking around and met a person who gave me a bat.”  Reina lifted up the bat and aimed it toward Eri.

“Reina.... you are so smart, why throw it away?”  Reina gave a fake smile.

“I'm smart, you shouldn't worry about me, and if you are, don't!”  Reina's attitude turned toward how the gangs would usually act.

Eri followed Reina home as usual but Eri wanted to lash out at her friend and as she got closer, she would raise her hands.  However back off at the last moment and she finally knew why Reina had turned: Intimidation

Reina was not big or tall but with her weapon she could get people's attention.  Eri wanted her to become more confident in her stature but she never thought Reina would go yankii.  She went home and ran up to her room to think about Reina.  Hours and hours of thinking of Reina as she kept looking out to see if she would  appear as usual.  However, it was 9 P.M. and she still wasn't there, Eri walked away until she heard a voice.

“OI!”  Eri ran over to see Reina waving at her.

“Hey...” Eri looked over and see Reina in a ponytail.

“Eri, you look worried.”  Reina dropped the bat on the ground.

“I am good, I feel better.”  Eri said quietly.

“Eri, tell me what's wrong?  I care for you, not like I became this on my own, you made me this way.”  Eri slammed her fist into the table.

“I never wanted you to become a yankii!”  Eri yelled out.

“What did you want me to do?  Stay as a nerd and get pushed around by the kids.  You told me to become better.”  Reina replied back.

“What about math club?  We agreed on that remember?”  Eri pleaded to Reina.

“Yes, I know, but why I can't be a yankii and be smart, is it stereotypical to think of me selling my brain to be a yankii?  If that is the case, then we are done.”  Reina picked up the bat and walked away as eri held her breath.

“I LOVE YOU!”  Eri yelled out.

Reina turned and looked up at Eri as she started to cry and put her face into her arms.  Reina ran toward  the window and closed her fists.

“Eri.... I want you to understand that I am sick of getting picked on, first all the girls saying I am short, second, I cannot attract any boys, and finally...” 

“Reina is better than any other girl, she cares for her best friend, no other girl would ever do that.”  Eri interrupted as she wiped away her tears.

“Eri... thank you but I want to make everybody go away from the stereotypical mold of a yankii, if I fail, I will blame myself every time for failing you.”  Reina gave her classic wink which made Eri happy as always.


Eri soon realize her day dream has led her to night time and the rumble in her stomach indicated dinner and she walked out to find a bowl of cooked shredded pork and a bowl of rice set up for her as her uncle knocked back a beer.

“Uncle... is this for me?”  Eri pointed at herself.

“All is for you, Eri, eat up and get ready for tomorrow, Risa will be your boss for work and she doesn't like tardy people.”  Her uncle popped another bottle open and began to gulp down his first sip.

Eri grabbed a pair of chopsticks and picked up a small piece of shredded meat and placed it on her tongue as the salty taste filled it with the succulent aroma of fresh cooked pork.  As she chewed, she kept staring at her uncle as he was worried about the guy who was arrested.  Eri never seen her father be quiet about a person, it would usually be a talking fest with her mom and her until late night, especially drunk.  However, he sat on the steps with a few beer bottles by him as he looked out at the ocean.

Half an hour later, Eri managed to eat the pork and rice and slowly stepped out to see six bottle by him as he cradled one in his hands.  Eri took a deep breath and saw the waves crashing as it calmed her down. 

“Want to hear a story?”  Eri nodded slowly.

Her uncle walked into the house and grabbed his ukulele, he strummed to get the sound that he wanted, and started to put a melody together.  Eri swayed left and right as she heard the waves crashing with the eclectic sounds of the ukulele.

I saw you in my dreams
We were walking hand in hand
On a white, sandy beach of Hawaii

We were playing in the sun
We were having so much fun
On a white, sandy beach of Hawaii

The sound of the ocean
Soothes my restless soul
The sound of the ocean
Rocks me all night long


Eri began to wonder the meaning as the image came to her head with a person holding her hand walking along the shoreline, and the instant reminder of a kiss.

Those hot long summer days
Lying there in the sun
On a white, sandy beach of Hawaii

The sound of the ocean
Soothes my restless soul
The sound of the ocean
Rocks me all night long

Last night in my dreams
I saw your face again
We were there in the sun
On a white, sandy beach of Hawaii

Eri got up with a yawn and walked back to her room and laid down on the pillow as she reminisced about her first day in Hawaii.
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Offline oddball

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 4 2/15
« Reply #6 on: February 16, 2011, 02:46:35 PM »
Seems as though perhaps Reina turned into the 'steriotypical Yankii' that she tried so hard not to be like and it seems as though she took Eri with her.....

Offline kuro808

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 5 2/25
« Reply #7 on: February 26, 2011, 05:22:09 AM »
@oddy: Reina is quite influential

Chapter 5


Eri turned to look at the clock as she heard yelling from outside her door, she pried the door open a bit to see her uncle and the guy who was arrested earlier yelling at each other.  Eri stood there just having the memories of her spats with her own father.  It was always one-sided as she kept quiet against her father's rage.  However, her uncle was trying to keep him in control as he fell over with tears in his eyes. 

She closed the door as she tried to go to sleep but the image of her uncle holding him in his arms disturbed her. Eri closed her eyes for a bit only to wake up ten minutes later, fluffing her pillow or punching her pillow to let out her anger.  After a while, she looked up as the light started crawl into the room. 

“This is so irritating!”  Eri said to herself as she rolled off the bed and walked outside to see her uncle cutting into some sausage.

“Ohayou!”  Her uncle greeted as Eri bowed her head.

“I heard... yelling last night.... is everything okay?”  Eri asked.

“Don't worry, Eri, we just talked and you must have heard us, you should know that I am not your father, he likes to intimidate people to get his way, but he soon learned we cannot all get overpowered by words and he finally learned to back up his words.”  He threw the piece into a hot pan and flicked his wrist to move it around.

Eri sat down looking at the hot rice in front of her as she waited for the meat to be done.  Eri looked outside seeing a figure walking toward the door and she lifted up her hood to reveal her face.

“Morning, everyone.”  Risa greeted.

“Morning, join us for breakfast, Risa, I made a lot so you two can be at your best.”  He smiled as she looked at Eri.

“Looks like you didn't sleep well?”  Risa tilted her head.

“Yes... I'm sorry.” 

“Don't apologize, it happens especially being in a new place, you tend to not feel comfortable in another person's bed.  Maybe tonight you get back into the feeling of your own bed, well we need to eat quickly.”  Eri saw the hot food on the table and picked up a piece to put into her mouth, she chewed on it for a bit as she tried to digest the words.

Eri kept quiet with her mind on her uncle and seeing him in an embrace with the guy as she kept thinking of her father.  Risa noticed that Eri tended to space out when she didn't talk and Eri's uncle tried to take her out of her trance with no success.  Risa stood behind her and wrapped her arms around her head as she felt Eri's head turn toward Risa.

“HEY!”  Risa and her uncle laughed at the situation.

Eri started to cry in front of them with the two staring at her, both didn't know why she started to cry but watching her just cry herself out, Risa took her to the couch, and let her lie down as she tried to think of the words to comfort her.

“Sorry...”  Risa whispered.

“I... should... be... sorry.”  Eri saying her words between her hiccups

“Uncle, can I be with her alone?”  Risa called out as he nodded.

Risa grabbed her hand and led her outside to the beach as the sun was ready to rise and stood right before water's edge.  Eri wiped away the tears as Risa looked toward the ocean, smelling the air as she patiently waited for Eri to recover.  Both looked at each other when they were ready and Risa began to notice Eri beyond her shell.  Risa walked toward her and placed her hand on her shoulder.

“I want to tell you that if you do need to talk about anything that your uncle doesn't understand, you can always talk to me.”  Risa smiled as Eri smiled too.

“Thank you.... I am fine now.”  Eri walked toward the house but she soon stopped as she turned toward Risa.

“Do you have a boyfriend?”  Eri asked under her breath as Risa's eyes widened.

“No, my parents never let me had one and most of the time I was away from the community until here where I got to meet everyone but no one to understand my intimate feelings.  How about you?”  Eri looked down as she walked back toward her.

“I had a girlfriend... she was my friend.... until she became part of that gang and.... made me bad too.”  Risa closed her eyes for a bit as she digested the facts from her.

“You don't look like a bad person, you are innocent and timid, however you are stronger than you look and I think you can fight this.”  Risa picked up a handful of sand.

“I... still... love her.”  Risa dropped the sand.

Risa nodded as she walked back to the house as Eri's uncle walked back in.  Risa grabbed his hand into the adjacent room and punched her fist into the wall.

“What happened?”  He asked.

“Eri, why is she here?  What did she do?  It's all that girl's fault, she made her a pawn in her game, why do this to her?”  Risa started to punch the wall again as he tried to stop her.

“I feel the same way but I have to let her run her life, I cannot interfere while she is here, and I advise you that you should do the same until she realizes what her father is trying to teach her.”  Risa held her fist in front of the wall.

“Why do you have to be so wise when you know you could change her?  You sure you never had a wife?”  He started to laugh.

“Risa, Eri is volatile and let her understand that you are a friend to rehab her not anything else, but...”

“But....”

“I can't see it but if she does fall in love, insight the other person to let her go quickly.”  Her uncle walked out as she saw Eri on the couch.
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Offline oddball

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 5 2/25
« Reply #8 on: February 28, 2011, 12:17:52 PM »
Ah poor Eri, seems as though she knows that Reina wronged her yet she still loves her, it a bad place to be isn't it, seems as though Gaki feels her pain, I wonder though if perhaps Gaki may be getting some feelings for Eri and that's why she reacted the way she did?

Offline kuro808

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 6 3/2
« Reply #9 on: March 03, 2011, 12:41:56 AM »
@oddy Risa might be playing the pity card however she might be honest

Chapter 6

“Why do you keep talking to Risa about me?”  Eri asked as she had a serious face.

“Because, she is the best person who can help you as a peer.”  He explained.

“Why can't I roam around?  Are you here to let me enjoy the stay or try to get rid of my girlfriend?”  Risa slid in front of him before he could reply.

Risa dragged her outside before anyone had the chance to talk and slapped Eri across the face as hard as she could.  Eri fell over holding her cheek with her hand looking up at Risa.  Eri stood up and looked at Risa for a bit before walking back.  Risa grabbed her hand and Eri let go of her as she marched back and turned toward her.

“Risa, don't underestimate me, I may seem weak but I do bite, I am just here because of my parents but if this is what I have to do, then fine, I will get dressed and will be ready to work.”  Eri marched back as her uncle patted Risa on the head.

“Don't do that again, I know you respect me but Eri will have to learn on her own if she fits or not, because I got to send her back no matter what.”  Risa sat on the porch as she pondered over her actions.

After a few minutes Eri walked out with a shirt and shorts and followed Risa to the road with the few cars passing by on the road early in the morning.  They both ran across and got to their tiny stand, Eri looked below to find small pamphlets and carried the box up to the table top.  Risa took out a few and spread it out on the table sorting it out between the two as Eri leaned onto the side.

“Risa.... do you have somebody close to you?”  Eri asked as Risa looked back surprised.

“You mean like a sibling?”  Eri shook her head.

“Ah, no partner, I always have been a lone wolf among the people I meet, I talk but never stay true friends until here but still no one really liking me for who I am, why?”  Risa got a stack ready for Eri as she carried the box down.

“Well, I thought you had a person you were interested in...”  Eri grabbed her stack and pushed it toward her side.

“I have been here so long that many have become friends and found girls that were more attractive than me and the ones who are interested, I see them only at that level.”  Risa explained.

“Ah I see.”  Both noticed the sun had fully appeared and looked out for potential people to pass by.

Eri began to notice the people coming in groups as all the other businesses opened up and they went to their stores.  The pamphlets were very colorful and caught the people's eyes quickly as they looked around for the coupon on the other side.  It was a free surfing lesson if they spent money in the store and for the free publicity it was well worth the effort.

The tourists stared at Eri for a bit making her uncomfortable and forcing her to be more aggressive with her looks as they all passed by.  Risa let her take a break by sitting in the back as the community people offered them water for their effort.  Eri kept taking little sips as Risa began to run out of of pamphlets and took some from Eri as she rested.  Risa let Eri take the reins for a while as the pace picked up for a bit with the mid-morning crowd looking over the beach.

“Hello, may I have a pamphlet?”  The guy asked with his family behind him as Eri handed him one pamphlet.

Eri felt a shiver down her spine like how a cold wind catches a person unexpectedly and she looked out to the small crowd as they were going over to the beach.  Risa came up from her break and she saw an opportunity to give Eri a chance to watch from a closer view.  She closed down shop and both crossed the street to go back to the beach side.

“Risa... do you surf?”  Eri asked.

“Not the big waves, I usually do it close to shore and ride to the coast.”  Eri nodded as a wave appeared and two were testing their courage to get themselves under the crest.  Within a few seconds, each passed through under the wave and raise their hands in victory.

Eri applauded at the effort as Risa just smiled at her with the sun still out, Risa walked back to her house with Eri following her closely.  Eri stopped at the steps giving Risa her space to go into her house, however she felt curious and walked to the mesh door to see a plain room with a couch and a television.

“Eri, you can come in.”  Risa called from the other room.

She walked in slowly and noticed the clean areas in the house, she started to notice the cleanliness was all over the house, and then walked into the bathroom.  She looked at the mirror and notice the dark areas under her eyes.  Eri turned on the faucet and washed her face as Risa stood in the doorway, Eri turned with her face covered in water, and caught Risa giving her a mean look.

“You look cute, when you get caught.”  Risa said as Eri wiped her face.

“Thank you?”  Risa walked back into the kitchen as Eri followed her and with a weird twist of faith, she couldn't keep her eyes off her backside as she reached for a fruit.  She turned to the television as Risa walked back toward her.

“You look guilty.”

“No, just waiting for you.”

“Hmm, I wonder what you saw that makes your face look so cute.”  Eri pouted at her.

“Apples.”  Eri said bluntly.

“Apples?  What about apples?”  Eri grabbed one and bit into it before Risa could get an answer.

“You must have seen something, let's see what was in the kitchen that you saw.”  Eri took the fruit out of her mouth and placed it back down as Risa checked out the kitchen.

“Well whatever you did see, it must have been a pleasant sight.”  Risa peeled her banana and chomp down on it.

Eri just stared at Risa as she ate the banana in her seat and then a thought hit Risa's mind and had her sight pointed at Eri.

“You are evil, I know what you were staring at, we just keep it between us two.”  Risa finished the banana as Eri just sat there in fear.
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Offline oddball

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 6 3/2
« Reply #10 on: March 03, 2011, 11:10:28 AM »
bit of an odd chapter, seems as though Risa does not take kindly to Eri being upset at her uncle not letting her do her own thing, though why Risa gets so angry is beyond me.

the end of this chapter I felt was a bit scary, the way Risa acts after she catches Eri checking her out is, well, a bit freaky.....

Offline kuro808

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 7 3/6
« Reply #11 on: March 07, 2011, 09:22:44 AM »
@oddy: liking the Jekyll and Hyde XD

Chapter 7

Risa stood up as she watched Eri with her eyes as she threw the banana skin away and she walked back quickly with Eri turning toward the beach. 

“Well, I think you should go home, I need to make dinner soon and he will probably feed you.”  Risa grabbed her and escort her to the house.

“One day... we shall eat together?”  Risa looked up.

“Okay, we will, he don't mind just gotta inform him before coming over.”  Risa gave Eri a smile before dropping her off.

“Thank you, see ya tomorrow?”  Risa nodded.

“I'll meet you at the stand in the morning, is that okay with you?”  Risa waved at her.

Eri walked in to see her uncle sleeping on the couch and found dinner on the table but she decided to take a shower before eating but a note caught her eye.

Eri, your father called in to check on you and I told him not to worry, seems like he misses you but he is doing it for your own health so please thank him when you do come back.

Eri crumpled the not in her hands and threw it into the trash, she grabbed her clothes and walked into the bathroom as she digested the note.  She wanted to punch something but in her frustration she looked at her body and notice the patch on her arm.  Eri scratched at the area as she felt the stress build in her.  Eri jook off her clothes and jumped into the shower as the warm water hit her body.

“I can't believe he would call, he hates me and wants to know what I am doing, lucky for uncle to be nice to not talk bad about him.”  Eri said to herself.

Eri heard a knock at the door and her uncle opened the door slightly as he tried to communicate to her, however the room had become steamy and the draft caught Eri by surprise.

“Eri, I saw the note in the trash, I understand but if you need to talk about your day, I am willing to listen.”  He closed the door and Eri squeezed the shampoo bottle to start washing her hair.

In an instant, she found herself thinking about Risa, it was quite a funny moment to see how she reacted to checking her out.  Eri began to feel weak as she began to think of her as more of a friend and looking forward, she was beginning to lose her thought and the shampoo had gone into her eyes.  She immediately washed her hair out in the water as her eyes was recovering from the burn.

“Eri, I am going to take your clothes for wash.”  Her uncle called out.

“Okay...”  Eri furiously washing her eyes out in the warm water as she grabbed the body soap.

Eri caught the scent of coconut and rubbed her body with the soap and moisturizer was perfect for her sensitive skin.  The scent was refreshing because her soap at home was plain and always caused her to breakout if she had a lot of stress.  Eri looked at the full bar and noticed none of the uncle's stuff was in the shower and she thought he wasn't showering.  She shook off the thought and let the water wash off the excess soap.

Eri walked out and saw the towels lined up for her as she grabbed the biggest one and wiped the water off her body.  She quickly put her clothes back and saw her uncle on the table serving her hot rice.

“Thank you.”

“Eri have a seat.”  Eri sat across of her uncle and looked at the food.

“Eri, I know you are not liking your father but I think you are confused, if she was truly a good friend, she wouldn't put you through so much trouble.”  Eri looked up instantly.

“I know...”  Eri said under her breath.

“So why follow her?”

“Because she is my girlfriend.”  Her uncle stroked his chin.

“Girl friend?”  He sat back waiting for the explanation.

“I love her very much and she feels the way I feel.”  Her uncle shook his head in understanding.

“I see, I won't say anything but I want to say that you should be the good girl I remember, because your father is still concerned.”  Eri picked up her chopsticks and got her food as they both ate in silence.

Eri knew that if her uncle sided with him, she wouldn't budge but he was just trying to change her ways without force.  She was in her comfort zone as he didn't speak for the whole meal but she looked outside to find Risa waving toward her.  Risa entered into the house as she sat next to Eri watching her eat.

“So, what brings you here?  You need food?”  Her uncle laughed.

“No, I wanted to ask if you don't mind if we ate together at my house before Eri leaves for Japan.”  Risa held her fingers crossed as Eri was praying for her.

“I guess I wouldn't mind, but she has to come home after, I can't let her sleep over.”  Risa and Eri cheered as they got what they wanted and Risa left with a smile.

Eri couldn't hide her smile with the good news and she shoved everything into her mouth to celebrate her win.  She felt the uncertainty from her uncle but it seemed he was comfortable with the decision as he walked toward the refrigerator to get a beer.  Eri washed her bowl and walked back to her room as she took out a photo of her girlfriend and smiled at her. 

She quickly put the photo away as she gave out a big yawn to confirm her exhaustion and put her head onto her pillow.  She closed her eyes to the comfort of the clean pillow and warm blanket as she went off to dreamland.  Minutes later, Risa returned to her uncle as he was in a relaxed mood and could talk to anyone.

“Are you okay with us eating together?”  Risa asked as she popped open a soda.

“Of course, it is no problem.”  He took another sip of his beer.

“Okay, that's good.”  He got up and scratched his head.

“Just take good care of her and bring her back before bedtime, if not, I will personally bring her back.”  Risa nodded as she went back out.
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Offline shenlog

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 7 3/6
« Reply #12 on: March 07, 2011, 09:19:41 PM »
Risa's and Eri's relationship seems kind of weird... or maybe I'm just weird  :?
Eri protecting Reina was well cute  :wub:

Offline oddball

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 7 3/6
« Reply #13 on: March 13, 2011, 07:25:39 PM »
hmm, Eri seems to kinda hate and love Reina at the same time, like she loves the girl but hates what she does....

Still a bit wierded out by Risa too, her and Eri, well, they just are a bit odd arn't they?

Offline kuro808

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Re: Promised Love Chapter 7 3/6
« Reply #14 on: April 23, 2011, 08:33:16 AM »
I am so sorry for not updating this, and will not anytime soon, but if you guys want to know what I am doing, please PM
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