Snow RainIt was cold. Of course, it was winter, so cold was definitely a given. Not that she was used to cold winters, even though Tokyo did have relatively mild ones. Fukuoka never got that cold.
Thankfully, she didn't live in Hokkaido. Tanaka Reina always wondered if she would survive being frozen to an icicle every winter season. Not that she wanted to try, of course.
Though, the snow might have been nice. Snow wasn't all that common in Tokyo, and when it did get round to snowing it never got that thick. Or nice and pretty like in Christmas cards. It was just grimy, icy, and annoying. And wet. Cold and wet didn't mix well at all.
Like right now. It was raining. In December. Rain was...
unusual at this time of the year. Unless there was a typhoon or something. God forbid. She was fairly sure the weather forecast hadn't predicted any tropical storms of the like, and it wasn't the right season for it anyway. But then again, the weather forecast didn't predict rain for today either. Or for the next 5 days.
Stupid meteor-something people...stupid weather forecasts... Reina was not pleased. It was late at night, she was cold, and she was caught out in bad weather without any decent protection. Her heavy coat might ward off the biting chill of a Tokyo winter night, but not when it was soaked through with the icy drizzle that was rapidly escalating into a blinding downpour from out of nowhere.
Currently, she was taking refuge in the front porch of a building, as were many other unfortunates who were also caught unawares by the freak storm. A few brave souls decided to make a run for it, their figures quickly swallowed up by the obscuring fog of darkness and precipitation. Reina contemplated doing the same, but ultimately decided against it. Running and her were not closely associated terms. And it was still a fair distance to the train station. The young idol didn't think it was a particularly good idea to run through the rain and risk catching a chill afterwards. Especially since it was a long ride home.
Still, if the rain did not let up soon, she probably had to make a run for it anyway. It was getting close to midnight, and she definitely didn't want to miss the last train and get stranded out here, all wet and cold and shivering. While calling a cab might be marginally feasible, she shuddered at the projected cost. She might be an idol, but wasting money on something other than food and clothes (the only things worth spending on in her opinion) was anathema to her.
Standing somewhat apart from the huddled, shivering mass crowded in that limited space, Reina grimly decided to make a dash for it, lowering her head in a completely unenthusiastic manner to steel herself for the inevitable. Her already slight form seemed to shrink into the voluminous coat that surrounded her, the collar being pulled more securely upwards in some small, vain hope that the action would prevent excessive amounts of the wet stuff dribbling down her neck and running down her back. She absolutely
hated it when that happened.
As it turned out, she did not have to bother with all that.
"...Reina? Is that you?" Reina blinked, her perpetually wonky eyes twisting together, although that little detail was partially obscured by the hat pulled low over her face. She was fairly sure no one would have noticed who she was (assuming they knew who she was, she thought just a bit cynically, remembering that well-meaning but idiotic talent scout from that one time), especially not in such wretched weather in that vein of an old and overused cliche of a dark and stormy night.
Of course, the only people who would recognize her in this particular garb would had have to be those who had seen her in it not too long ago. Aka, her co-workers. The voice and general physique of the person instantly gave it away anyway. There were only so many people who were at eye level with her in Morning Musume after all.
"Takahashi?" Reina blurted out instinctively, sounding a bit gruff due to her bad mood at being caught out in such bad weather. She tended to revert to type when off camera and especially when cranky. Both conditions of which definitely applied at this time.
The person she addressed stepped closer, well-armed with an umbrella and much drier than Reina herself currently was. Ai's face was not particularly pleased at being addressed so curtly, and especially not by her family name, Reina remembered belatedly after her slip of the tongue. Mentally, the wonky teen shrugged. Big deal, the leader could live with it.
"What are you doing here?" Reina resisted to roll her eyes and snipe back bitterly with some snarky comeback. Typical of Takahashi to be so...
obvious. Or would that be oblivious? Her inner yankii snidely asserted that it was probably both.
She did none of the sort though, at least, nothing rude. Not particularly anyway, at least by her standards. Mutely, she just jabbed a finger at the rain cascading in sheets all around them, before punctuating it with a curt one-word reply. "Rain."
"Yes I can see that." Ai replied in her typically blank tone. Reina resisted the urge to throttle the older woman when Ai went on. "I thought you left first, why are you still here?"
Because I have short legs LIKE YOU and can't run for nuts. Besides, who the hell runs all the way from the building to the station unless there was some bloody emergency?! Irritated was just a minor understatement to use for describing Reina's inner self at the moment. But then again, there was always something to be irritated about with her, so it wasn't so uncommon. Reina also conveniently decided to forget that Ai could run much faster than her, since she didn't need any further aggravation. It wasn't like she was all that eager to make it to the front page of gossip magazines by inflicting physical violence on her leader.
Perhaps Ai must have sensed Reina's impending rage, for she swiftly changed topics without even batting an eyelid...or even, in fact, connecting it to whatever she was saying before. Conversational shortcuts were convenient for the user, although inexplicable to someone else not so much acquainted with their thought processes. Such as a much baffled Reina unfortunately was.
"I can walk you to the station. That's where you're going, right?" Reina blinked again at Ai, clearly a bit surprised by the offer...or perhaps, not so surprised. She should have known that goody-two-shoes would be nice enough to help. Deciding to let her earlier animosity dissipate a little at this kind gesture, Reina nodded, not trusting herself to speak, knowing that she would probably say something totally inappropriate if she did.
The umbrella really wasn't that large, but then again the two girls weren't that big either. Nevertheless, the driving rain made it necessary for them to walk closely together, their shoulders touching. The initial stretch as they carefully picked their way across a slippery street was made in utter silence, save for the natural din occurring due to the rain around them. Reina shivered in her damp coat and pressed unconsciously closer against the older woman, her mittened hands wringing each other out as she wedged her elbows closer to her own tiny frame, desperate for some warmth that was currently unavailable to her.
"You shouldn't have been out in the rain. You'll get sick." Ai murmured, casting a sidelong glance at Reina, who glared back.
"Well, who carries an umbrella wherever they go? Especially now?" Reina growled, forgetting her earlier resolution to be at least civil if nothing else. "Like, why the hell do you have an umbrella with you so conveniently?"
"It was in my bag." Ai shrugged, not taking offense at the vulgar language. Reina, had she not already wanted to slap her forehead for the non-answer to her question, would have been further perplexed by that. Ai was a strange person. Simple things offended her where most people wouldn't have been, but the woman wouldn't bat an eye at some of the more offensive things that the rest of society would have frown upon.
"Tch." Reina refused to dignify that with a response. Talking with Takahashi exasperated her sometimes. One could never get a straight answer out of her, and even if she did answer the question properly, there were all sorts of interesting implications involved. Briefly, the teen wondered how Gaki-san put up with their sometimes-flaky leader. It had to take a lot of patience, something Reina wasn't completely sure that her sub-leader had. But then again the once reaction queen was good with children, and dealing with Takahashi couldn't have been very much worse than dealing with a bunch of screaming brats. At least Takahashi wasn't very loud, even when she was angry...
I think... Reina frowned to herself, racking her brain for any instances of Ai being explosive in any way. Other than on stage, of course... Reina would have been blind not to notice that. It was as if the woman was possessed by something once she started performing. Completely different once on stage. Reina herself put out a different persona for the cameras too, but this was somehow different. For one thing, Reina knew that her own idol image was a carefully maintained construct to pander to the audience (well, some sections of it anyway), but with Takahashi she wasn't sure how much of that persona was made up or how close it was to her real personality. There seemed to be a distinct blurring of those lines where the leader was concerned, something Reina resented slightly. Why did she have to put up so elaborate a guise when Takahashi could just come so close to "being herself" and get away with it?
"How have you been doing?" Another random question from the woman in question next to her jolted the younger out of her increasingly bitter thoughts. Reina whipped her head around to stare disbelievingly at Ai, who blinked back innocently, her eyes shining with a sincerity that if coming from anyone else, would have been completely fake. But this was her, and Reina knew for a fact that her leader
did mean it.
It was just that, considering their surroundings, wasn't it a little strange to be talking about this right now?
Some of that must have communicated itself onto Reina's face, for Ai backtracked a bit to explain herself...sort of.
"You look tired earlier, and you left so quickly. I thought there might have been something wrong so..." Ai left it hanging awkwardly, clearly trying to communicate her concern though uncertain about how exactly to voice it. Their footsteps had unconsciously slowed, although they were still generally inching towards the station. Protected against the scrutiny of others in such a setting, since the rain provided a convenient shield against them being heard or even easily noticed, what with everyone else scurrying for shelter or going towards their destinations, they stared at each other with a new intensity they rarely shared. It was as if the two of them had been isolated in their own little world under that single umbrella.
The connection was intriguing, Reina had to admit. Oh, she interacted with her leader often enough, especially when the latter spontaneously decided to try and kidnap one of the other members to go watch Takarazuka with her. If anything, Ai was quite consistent in some of her behaviors. That and, Reina wasn't above 'borrowing' from Ai's quite extensive music collection that had nothing but range to commend it. Everything from the expected (Takarazuka stuff), to the normal (other assorted Japanese singers), to the downright random (lots of Western pop music, and then there was that suspicious heavy metal album lurking behind a shelf...). There were even some classical music albums knocking around in that collection, though Reina didn't touch those.
Yet, Reina realized that she never really looked at Takahashi. Like, really looked. She was aware of the other's existence, watched her closely at times when they were performing or at practice, but those interactions were mostly dealing with Ai as some kind of role model of sorts, if somewhat unconscious in their assumption. It was undeniable that Ai was good at what she did, and Reina wasn't above picking up a few tips and tricks wherever she could to improve herself as well. She had somehow neglected to look on her leader as a person, for some reason. It just didn't seem very relevant since they didn't really hang out much outside of work. Reina didn't believe in getting to know someone unless she was really that interested, and it was difficult to command anything but a cursory interest from her under the best of circumstances.
But she really looked at her leader now, and despite the poor lighting conditions, there was no denying that Takahashi looked...
older. Perhaps not exuding the same kind of maturity and confidence that people like Nakazawa or Yoshizawa would have had, but the Takahashi standing before her now seemed a lot less distant in that "off in her own world" way she used to be. That once-vacant expression had been replaced by one that was both intent and intense at the same time, with just a tinge of harried stress lines crinkling the edge of her eyes. And those eyes...Reina frowned momentarily, surprised by her own sudden clarity of insight regarding her usually enigmatic (read: vague) leader. Takahashi actually looked tired, and more importantly, strained.
That was new. The older woman was usually the picture of professionalism. Even when goofing off backstage with those close to her, she very rarely let any signs of her own problems pop up significantly enough to bother other people. She was unusually focused on whatever she had to do, and Reina grudgingly admitted that Takahashi was far more serious about work than the rest of them were. Granted, they were off work now, but it was simply strange to see her showing actual signs of exhaustion.
Not that the dark circles under her eyes weren't a dead enough giveaway. It was just that everyone in the group had eyebags, just to different degrees. The wonders of makeup erased those physical signs for the cameras, but otherwise, it was sort of a normal "accessory" for the members. Living on short sleep did that to people. Reina had ceased to use that little fact as a gauge for exhaustion levels, given how widespread it was. Eyebags or not, they still had to work.
"Reina, is there something on my face? Why are you staring?" Ai sounded just a little insecure, her free hand reaching up to tentatively touch the edges of her jawline. Reina mentally slapped herself for being so obvious, her face taking on a defensive cast as she retreated back into her shell a little, trying to take back control of the situation.
"It's nothing." The teen muttered brusquely, before letting loose an abrupt chuckle. "Taka---" At Ai's disapproving expression, Reina quickly reversed gears. An upset Takahashi might not be as terrifying as a pissed off Nakazawa, but it came horrifyingly close, just more subtly. "Ah, Ai-chan, we're
all tired nowadays, nothing new."
"That's true." Ai gave ground, her hand falling away from her face to dangle loosely by her side. Reina watched without a word. They had somehow slowed to literal stop somewhere in their exchanges, pausing underneath the limited circle of light emitted by a flickering lamp post. Reina couldn't stop her curiosity any longer, so she shot off the question before the rest of her common sense caught up with her impatient tongue.
"Why did you come looking for me? I thought you would be leaving with Gaki-san at least." Reina knew that this probably the best place or time to say something like that, but since the words had already left her mouth, she refused to regret it. She watched with interest as Takahashi's face grow slightly darker at the mention of the name, her cheeks becoming slightly pinched as her forehead furrowed slightly. Clearly, the gut instinct that had driven Reina to ask the question had been somewhat spot on about the fact that something was bothering her leader. Equally foreseeable was the fact that the person most likely to distress Takahashi Ai was without a doubt one Niigaki Risa.
Reina briefly wondered what silly argument had occurred
this time. Those two argued like an old married couple at times, although the frequency of those little spats had decreased in recent times, what with Gaki-san running off with Kamei half the time, and Takahashi seeking the company of some of the former Momusu members during her off time. Reina had eyes, albeit wonky ones, and she could use them just as well. Niigaki and Takahashi were comfortable with each other, but they weren't as close as they used to be. It was hard to put a finger down on what or where exactly the cracks were, but there was definitely some sort of an undefinable distance hovering between the current leader and sub-leader. Of course, it didn't bother Reina too much. It was none of her business after all.
"Gaki-san wanted to wait for Kamei-chan." Reina quirked an eyebrow, but didn't press further. She didn't have to, since Ai continued on.
"Well, after that Koharu came by and commented that you didn't look too good when you left, and then it started to rain..." Ai smiled faintly at the expression on Reina's face. "I know you hardly carry an umbrella around, and since Koharu mentioned it, I thought I should at least try to be a good leader and, you know, do something..." A sheepish expression came over Ai's face. "I don't suppose I'm doing a very good job of it right now, am I?"
Reina, meanwhile, was still trying to digest the fact that it was Koharu, of all people, who had expressed more concern for her general well-being. Sure, she hung out with her junior from time to time, probably deriving some perverse pleasure from the fact that she was definitely in control when with the younger girl. Reina felt more relaxed about letting her former yankii attitude leak out in front of the still impressionable Koharu, knowing that with the departure of a certain Fujimoto,
she was the only true rebel left in Morning Musume, even if she didn't tend to show it as obviously on screen nowadays, unless horribly provoked by one thing or another. Koharu seemed to like that, but Reina definitely hadn't expected that Koharu would actually care about her. It was just...odd.
"You know, Reina, we
do care." Ai stated just a little drily. At the cynical glance directed from Reina to her, Ai amended slightly. "More or less." Reina chuckled even as Ai continued. "Do you want to talk about it? I'm not Yossy, but I think I can listen if nothing else..."
Reina looked at her flatly in the face, her inner yankii deciding to flex its muscle again. "Somehow I think you're really not going to be able to help, since you're worse about it than I am." Reina looked dramatically and pointedly upwards. "And why the hell are we standing out here like a couple of idiots? I'm still wet and cold and I wanna go
home." The last bit was said through gritted teeth. Reina knew it was unfair to unleash her own bad temper on a well-meaning Ai-chan, but she really didn't want people to pick at her sore spots when she didn't feel like talking about them.
"This is about Maki, isn't it?" Ai said quietly, so quietly that Reina thought she had heard wrongly over the incessant patter of raindrops. Regardless, the very mention of the name made Reina stiffen, her face setting into a dark scowl. She turned away from the understanding gaze, firmly setting her shoulder as a bulwark against that searching look. Oh, how she hated it when someone saw through her like a pane of glass. Was she that obvious? Or was it merely because....
"You've heard then?" Ai's voice never raised over that quiet timbre, so much that Reina, despite herself, strained as close as she could without being obvious about it to listen. What was the woman talking about...
oh. Sensing that something more was going on, Reina cautiously met Ai's eyes, and was surprised to find her own turmoil reflected clearly in those luminous orbs. It couldn't be that...
"I thought it was just some stupid rumor..." Reina began warily, looking at Ai with a new light as her brain worked to process what little information she had. After all, the matter in question had never even been big enough to be publicized in any shape or form. It was a strictly inner circle thing, not even really known to the rest of the Project. And even among the Morning Musume members, only a select few knew anything concrete, and people like Reina only managed to grasp bits and pieces from what leftover conversational slips had revealed. It had just seemed too implausible at the time...
"It was stupid, yes, but hardly insubstantial." There was an unusually hard, bitter cast to those usually soft, doe-like eyes. An uncharacteristic smirk, strangely sad, worked its way onto Ai's face as she appeared to stare right through Reina's face. "I always did tend to get attached to all the wrong people."
"So, you..." Reina began again, trying to digest the implications. Ai's face softened slightly.
"No, nothing happened, if that's what you were thinking. I was confused, and it was a phase..." Ai shrugged nonchalantly, her eyes once again guarded. Her voice was ironic as she continued. "Not for lack of trying of course."
A nervous laugh escaped Reina's throat. The situation was feeling a little too surreal, and she felt like she was losing her grip on the whole exchange. That wasn't good at all. Taking in a quick breath, Reina set her shoulders and looked Ai squarely in the eye.
"And your point was?" The unspoken challenge was right there in the open. No one could possibly miss it. Ai gave her an unreadable sort of look.
"That you're luckier than I am, Reina. Kindness can be cruel. You're lucky because she already learned how to be cruel in order to be kind by the time you came into the picture." Ai smiled wryly to herself, but a kind of obscure pain clouded her eyes. Reina felt a sudden chill that had nothing to do with her shivering state as she put a few more things together in her head.
"But you and her...you guys seemed fine..." Reina tried to sort out that frustrating tangle of thought and emotion. On one hand, her own feelings about the situation were simple enough to understand, though hardly any easier to deal with. On the other, this new discovery was, well, unsettling. The fact that her idol had appeared to hurt Takahashi deeply on some level was somehow disturbing, if not shocking.
"It was a long time ago. We managed to clear things up." Ai replied just a little abruptly from her standards, shrugging her shoulders again. Her face was downcast, seeming preoccupied with Reina's rain-wet boots.
Reina felt like she was treading on thin ice when she spoke again. "But you're not ok, are you?"
Ai looked up at her sharply, and Reina actually took a half step backwards, hackles rising defensively. Neither of the girls seemed to realize that the rain was sputtering out around them, too caught up in their conversation to care at the moment. The tension actually appeared to light the air between them, as if a live wire had been superimposed into the limited distance separating their bodies.
It was Ai who broke the impasse first. "Probably not, but who ever is?" Her voice was now neutral, though the look in her eyes made Reina squirm in her boots.
Feeling marginally braver (and desperate to regain some semblance of dignity), Reina ventured tentatively, unaware that her own eyes had betrayed the deeply buried concerns reflected in the question.
"Will you ever be ok?"
Ai didn't answer immediately, but her next action made Reina let out a startled curse, jumping a little closer to her. The older woman had abruptly lowered the umbrella, closing it in one fluid motion. It took Reina a couple of moments to realize that it had stopped raining entirely.
"What the hell was that for?!" Reina jabbed Ai's shoulder on instinct, reverting back into her rough accent and glaring at the impassive woman who had just a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.
"It stopped raining, so the umbrella wasn't necessary." Ai said meaningfully, giving Reina a sidelong look as she started to walk away. The younger former (or not?!) yankii snorted, scrambling to catch up without slipping on the slick street.
"You never answered my question!"
Ai smiled enigmatically. "Oh, but I did."
Reina growled, her eyebrows knitting together as she struggled to recall where exactly an answer could have been intimated. "Are you laughing at me?"
"Not particularly, no." Ai replied airily, as if nothing had happened. Reina resisted the urge to hit her leader again. It just wouldn't do to leave bruises after all.
"Quit being mysterious and just tell me, you big faker." Reina grumbled, rubbing vigorously at her arms in an effort to stimulate warmth, while casting a resentful glance at the still very dry and clearly not freezing Takahashi ahead of her.
"Thinking about it might keep you out of trouble." Reina might not have been able to see the grin on Ai's face, but she definitely felt it anyway. Her scowl grew deeper.
"I just
know you're laughing at me."
Ai's smile was beatific. "If you know it, why are you asking?"
"This has something to do with that umbrella thing, isn't it?" Reina changed direction abruptly, trying to distract herself from pursuing murderous instincts and causing grievous bodily harm to the older girl.
"Maybe."
Reina stared malevolently at Ai's profile. "I wonder how Gaki-san puts up with you."
"You tell me." Ai seemed rather indifferent, her attention caught up elsewhere. Reina felt somehow ignored, and resented that deeply. On the bright side though, her present irritation with Takahashi was definitely doing a good job of dispelling her morose musings from previously.
"Takahashi, you absolutely impossible..." Reina began, her hands on her hips, but was cut short when Ai suddenly squealed out loud, holding her hands out, palms up as if in supplication to some unknown deity. The reason for it became apparent soon enough.
"First rain, now
snow?" Reina blurted out, even as something wet plopped onto her shoulder.
"It's not really snow, not completely." Ai corrected absently. "It's mostly water with little frozen bits. I think its called a freezing drizzle or something."
Reina was about to make a snarky reply when a sneeze caught her off guard. She shivered again, feeling the piercing chill more acutely not, as if sensing the sharp shift downwards in temperature right through the skin. Ai half turned in her steps to look at her worriedly.
"Cold?" Reina gave her a flat stare that plainly said "well duh!". Ai looked slightly apologetic, and glanced around to gauge the distance to the station.
"Tell you what, I'll race you to the station. A good run should warm you up a bit." Ai's smile was completely innocent, but also utterly vicious from Reina's point of view. That was evil. Pure
evil.
"You did want to catch the last train, right? We're running late~" Ai started sprinting off swiftly, leaving a very cross Reina trailing behind her and blistering the air with curses (under her breath of course). How could she be so bipolar and all-round
abnormal?
Shaking her head, Reina picked up speed reluctantly, anxious to get out of the increasingly freezing outdoors. Looking upwards at the murky sky one more time, Reina briefly pondered the significance of Ai's answer to her question in relation to the sudden weather change. An ironic thought came unbidden to her, as she suddenly understood what Ai had been referring to earlier.
"What happens when rain turns to hail then?"
A rueful smirk. Some things just refused to go away.
At least, now I know that you know too.=================================================
That was uber long. Hope everyone likes.
Topic: Estrea's Sandbox [6/4 - Treat] (Read 240206 times)