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astro18 - Thanks for reading! I still can't decide whether it will end as TanaKame or TanaShige since both are my OTP but haha, we'll see.
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Sancho - There are so many good writers here and I see a few good new fics. I miss reading the fics here. Time to catch up! Well good luck!
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xyukie56 - Hahahaha so so so sorry. Well here's an update for ya.
This chapter is slightly longer than my usual chapter and I practically re-wrote the whole chapter (didn't like the first draft). So forgive me if there's a lot of spelling or grammatical mistakes. Brain too fried to edit.
Plus this chapter has bits and pieces of the past chapters as well as what's to come. Considering it was eons ago that I wrote the last chapters, I can understand if some might find this confusing. Do let me know if you don't understand any part. Anywho, presenting...
Chapter 15Should I smile because we are friends? ………
“What the heck?”
Reina hissed as she facepalmed herself. What in the world was wrong with her? Never mind the numerous careless mistakes she had been making the whole day; she could not believed that she could even forget to spell her name correctly.
She stared at the assignment that she was supposed to hand in right now. It was lucky that the professor agreed to extend her deadline.
As she grabbed her bag, the notes inside the bag fell out and scattered on the ground. Reina cursed inwardly. Today is just not her day, is it? She quickly stuffed the papers back into her bag when she noticed doodles of distorted rabbit, turtle and cat on one of the unused papers. Recalling the culprit behind the doodles, Reina sighed.
‘Tch, stupid Kame’ Today was entirely that turtle fault for making Reina lose her focus. It was confusing that a sense of emptiness filled Reina after Eri told her about her leaving.
It felt almost…unreal.
Dragging her feet out of the lecture theatre, she was surprised to see a familiar face waiting for her. How long has she been there? Reina could not recall making any plans with the girl. As if on cue, the girl looked up and greeted her with a lopsided grin.
“Reina!”
Instead of the usual glomp, the other girl seems to settle just wrapping her arm around Reina’s and the two girls walked out and down the street in silence as they made their way to where Eri’s birthday party was to be held. Along the way, they passed by a huge decorated Christmas tree, where the other girl insisted on stopping by the tree.
“It’s beautiful!” Sayu exclaimed. Reina chortled amused by the childlike behaviour her friend was showing. She noticed the other girl was behaving differently from the normal Sayu. Like she was…shy?
‘Probably the Christmas thingy,’ Reina thought as she noted the couples surrounding them.
Standing in front of the tree, Reina’s thoughts naturally went back to the time she stood in front of a similar tree in Fukuoka. Only…she was standing next to someone else. ‘Has it really been a year,’ her body tensed up as she reminisced the past.
‘I won’t leave you. I promise.’She remembered very well the promise she made. The last promise she made. One she could not keep. The reason that person was not standing next to her at this moment. And Reina knew that it was her fault that was so. It was guilt she would carry her whole life. She quickly blinked back the angry tears forming in her eyes. She promised herself she would not cry.
Perhaps it was also in her stubborn nature, but she could not bring herself to let go of the past. Simply because it would mean letting go of her love for Miki. And she does not want to forget. Or perhaps she is simply afraid to let go.
Because then, there wouldn’t be anything left she could hold on to.
~~~
Sayumi shivered slightly at the cold and moved closer to the shorter girl standing next to her. Noting the other was lost in her thoughts, she took this opportunity to study the girl better.
Reina had come across as an aloof and standoffish person the first time they met. Yet, Sayu remembered the warm feelings in her the first time she laid eyes on the yankii. It took a good long time, but the angry kitten had warmed up to them and, as she had hoped, accepted them as friends, though the younger girl still put on a wall around her.
But Sayu had also hopelessly wished for more, just as she secretly wanted to be the reason to bringing the smile back to the girl. The smile Reina had given her earlier had melted her heart and she hoped the smaller girl would listen to what she had to say.
Sayu loved how Reina decided not to tie her hair and let her long straight hair fall off her shoulders tonight. The white jacket the younger girl chose was a little big for her built, making the girl look smaller than she actually is. This only further accentuates the girl’s cuteness and it took Sayu a lot of self-control not to glomp the smaller girl already.
Sayu took a deep breath as she remembered Risa telling her about Ai’s ‘proposal’ in front of the very same tree and those couple rings currently adorning the lovebirds’ fingers. She wanted the same, and finally amassed enough courage to before she could convince herself that she would accept whatever answer Reina would give. Thoughts were racing as she tried to articulate the right words in her mind.
‘Will Reina say yes?’Feeling the girl next to her suddenly tense up, Sayu turned to look at the yankii, not liking what she was seeing. Reina, despite standing next to her, looked lonely. Her eyes are glazed with tears and something else. Almost as if the girl was in pain. Perhaps Reina is missing her family, she thought. It
is Christmas after all.
Seeing her kitten sad made Sayu a sad girl too.
Sayu cupped Reina’s face in her hands, startling the younger girl. She lightly thumbed the deep frown, moving down those slightly damp eyes, and resting on the cheeks. Her mind was running a thousand mile an hour as she thought of ways to distract Reina from those unhappy thoughts. An evil grin played on the bunny’s face as she decided to be…well, Sayu.
“IIIIII-TAI!!!” Reina glared at the laughing bunny, rubbing her stretched cheeks.
“Ahahaha sorry?”
Sayu tried to caress the cheeks she pinched seconds ago but Reina would just swat her hands away. The smaller girl really looked cute acting angry. Unable to hold back, she leaned in and gave a quick peck on the yankii’s cheek, much to the other’s surprise.
“Don’t be angry?” Sayu said sheepishly, not knowing herself if her question is towards her earlier attack towards the other’s cheeks or, well, her
attack. Suddenly shy now that she had done the act and noting how warm her own cheeks are right now.
Reina looked away grumbling with her hands across her chest. She looked almost angry, well almost, betrayed by the slight upturn of the corner of her lips.
Relieved to see a smile slowly returning to the younger’s face, she decided not to ask the younger any question for now.
“Let’s go?”
Reina nodded, happy to be distracted from her depressing thoughts.
“Sounds good to me.”
Taking Reina’s hand in hers, Sayu took her time walking down the pavement, relinquishing the alone time she has with the other girl. Right now, it is alright the way things are.
That confession would have to wait.
~~~
Soft music playing in the background was meant to be soothing. Yet, it was anything but relaxing for the five girls seated in a private corner of the Chinese restaurant. Risa was shooting daggers to the younger couple sitting opposite her with Ai very much prefer to focus on the menu instead. Eri could not help but feel sorry for the younger couple as she watched the taller of the two squirming under the scrutinizing eyes. Sitting next to her, Risa was staring daggers at the said girl whereas Airi was trying to lighten the awkward atmosphere and protect her girlfriend from her sister. Ai, however, seems more interested in the menu.
‘Or maybe not,’ Eri thought as she watched the other younger girl not intimidated and was in turn glaring at her sister. If only there’s a way to break this awkward silence.
“Alright I’m ready to order!” Ai announced happily completely oblivious of the awkwardness earlier. The younger couple was seen letting obvious sighs of relief, especially when the bean’s attention was shifted to her girlfriend.
‘Well that’s one way to kill this tension,’ Eri chuckled inwardly.
Eri quickly called for JunJun, who was only too happy to take the orders. The Chinese girl had insisted to provide Eri’s entourage a private room, citing that Eri was an important person being the first friend she made in Japan. Of course, Eri has to relate how she and Jun first met, earning few teasing from Risa and Airi for her airheadness. Orders were made, and Risa has gone back to scrutinising the couple sitting across her.
‘Poor girl,’ Eri thought as she played with her drinks, circling her straw in the glass and pushing the ice around. Getting bored, she excused herself, citing the need to freshen up. She waved at JunJun as she passed the Chinese girl on her way to the restroom.
“Sayu is late,” the turtle complained to her reflection in the mirror. She had wanted to introduce JunJun to Sayu, having this feeling that they would it off well.
“Or maybe she’s busy with Reina right now,” she sighed.
“You should just tell her, you know.” Ai broke the silence, startling Eri with the sudden statement. “Before it’s too late”
“EHHHHH!?” So engrossed in her own thoughts, she did not realised that Ai had entered the restroom and was standing next to her.
“Hahaha! Your reaction is so Risa-like!” Ai laughed as Eri touched her chest to calm her heart.
“Erm where was I?” Ai reiterated. “Oh yeah… If you like Reina, you should just tell her,”
“W-w-w-what? W-why?” Eri stuttered, before adding, “Is it…”
“Obvious? Yes,” Ai smiled.
Eri bit her lower lips. If Ai was aware of her feelings for Reina, does this mean Risa also knew? What about Reina? Or worse, Sayu? Was she over Risa already? Does she like Reina? And does Reina…knew about her feelings?
“There’s no way in a thousand years that’s gonna happen.”Eri shook her head as she recalled the exact words Reina said to Aika the other night. Reina was right. There’s no way anything could develop out of this relationship apart from housemates-who-became-friends due to special circumstances. She made up her mind to leave to be with her mum. It would be less painful and... scary.
“It’s okay to be afraid, you know,” Ai patted Eri’s shoulder. Eri’s widened and she turned to look at Ai. Did Ai just read her mind?
“Hey don’t look at me like that! I didn’t read your mind or anything!” Ai held up both hands in front of Eri and muttered “It’s just that I’ve been where you are now.”
The smaller girl looked down and started leaning against the wall, frowning as she contemplated her next words.
“Speaking of which, I need to apologise to you.”
“Ehhh?”
“I knew, you know. I knew it all along. Your feelings for Risa. But just like you, I was afraid. The three of you were close childhood friends. I was this outsider whom you met in the dance studio. You brought me in your lives. And I’ve liked Risa since the first time you introduced me to her. Call it love at first sight if you want. So you can imagine how happy I was when both of us joined the Student Council.”
Ai paused as she took a deep breath. Ai looked into Eri’s eyes before shifting them down again.
“But just like you, I was afraid. You were my friend. Erm, you are still, of course hahaha. I knew it would not be right to steal Risa from you. So I was contented just being her best friend. But it was hard. Pretending I was happy when I wanted more. But that night at the festival, I had a feeling I was going to lose her if I didn’t do anything. And her being jealous of LinLin was the sign that it was not one-sided. So I…you know.”
Ai looked up again only to see Eri staring at her. “Erm Eri, can you say something now?”
Eri sighed. “Aichan, you talk too much. Are you both happy right now?”
“I guess.”
“You guess?”
“Ah no! I mean, yeah. We are.”
“Then it’s all good. I loved her. And now I love her like how I love Sayu and Airi. And nobody can make Risa happy like you do.”
Ai muttered a soft thank you as she was overwhelmed by feelings. She has never felt as happy as she was with Risa. However, for every laughter that resided in her heart, they were always accompanied by the guilt towards Eri. That was why she decided that she would help Eri in chasing her own happiness. Eri deserves that.
“Reina…” Ai was quickly interrupted.
“…is a special friend. Just like you, I want my friend to be happy, and for her to decide what makes her happy. I will wait and accept whatever she decides.”
Ai nodded in understanding. It was not easy for them to break down the wall that Reina put up. Rushing things would only backfire and force Reina to retreat into her shell once again. The question is, can Eri give Reina the time she needed before she fly off, away from the yankii. Time. Only time will tell.
“Let’s go back to the others before someone cry murder,” Ai chuckled.
Eri giggled as she remembered poor Airi and Maimi sitting with Risa. Hopefully Risa has not maimed Maimi yet for dating her sister. Or worse, interrogate the poor girl.
~~~
Light grazing of the photographs accompanied the soft hums as the girl flipped through the prints that she just developed. She was contented seeing the subject of the photographs looking relaxed, though the pain was still evident in those eyes.
The girl frowned. Something was not right with those pictures. She grazed the edges of the images once more. Realising the problem, she gasped and mentally berated herself for not realising earlier.
“Too crowded,” she muttered. She slowly tore off the images of unwanted people until the only image is of that one girl. No necessity for any other girls to be in the picture.
“Ah that’s better,” she grinned as she pasted those snapshots to her already crowded wall. A corner of the room specially dedicated specially to her special one.
“Just you and me, Princess. Soon enough."
………Or should I cry because we are just that?
Topic: Solus (Chapter 15.5 - 01/04) (Read 52959 times)