So.... I have returned with another one-shot. Here y'all go!
Menthol“Reina!”
You scold me when I accidentally spilt my drink. I guess all that time helping out at your mother’s izakaya really did something to your waitress instincts.
“Sorry!”
We hastily wipe at the liquid until it disappeared, tossing the used napkins onto an empty plate. Smirking, you lean in closer to me, your fingers gently grazing my cheek as you spoke.
“You’re a little clumsy tonight, aren’t you?”
Your breath hit me like a speeding train, immediately trapping me and intoxicating all my senses. It’s exactly the same as it’s been since you picked up smoking; Seven Star Menthol Lights.
Every time I was near enough, that’s all I could smell. That same brand of cigarettes. I can’t count the number of times I wanted to taste it on your lips, almost losing control, almost leaning in to kiss you. Maybe you’ve noticed, because you’re being one hell of a flirt tonight.
“Only because I’m distracted by you,” I manage to wheeze back, testing the waters for your reaction. You smirk and reach out a hand to straighten out my top, your hand lingering near my collarbone a moment longer than necessary.
You order our next round of drinks and as we wait for our next dish to be served, you light up another cigarette. I couldn’t take my eyes off of it, off of your hands. The grace you possessed evident in the way you held the white cylindrical addiction. You catch me staring and slide the box to me.
The
only reason I ever smoked was to feel closer to you… to try and feel more connected to you… to
try and stand anywhere near the same plane of existence as you… We were never really close before you left. That one night you found me… the one night when I really needed someone to help me pick up the pieces… you gave me a cigarette, set me straight and stuck by me ever since. I never questioned it... I merely accepted it… accepted your presence, unwilling to leave me alone.
It’s been three years since you joined Avex. You made it bigger than any of us still stuck in Hello!Project could ever dream. You were every where; billboards, radio, commercials, magazines. Goto Maki became a powerhouse singer that Japan couldn’t seem to get enough of. And despite all of that, despite how busy you always were… you never failed to make time for me.
Every time we met, we would become caught in a dangerously tangled web of flirtation, albeit one that would never actually amount to anything. You would lean in to whisper things into my ear, paralyzing me with the heat of your breath. Placing a hand firmly on my waist you would draw me in closer, as if I was too far away to hear you.
I open the box and pulled out a cigarette for myself. Just as I was about to reach for your lighter you swiftly pick it up and light it for me. Those eyes; now half lidded and gazing at me with a look that seemed to suggest that you would take me right at this very moment. As soon as you reach over to brush some stray locks away from my eyes I could feel the butterflies dance in the very pit of my stomach. Only you could make them dance in such a way that brought me higher than any drug.
I inhale deeply, letting my eyes completely close as I take in the smoke and keep it there. As I turn my head to face you, I open my eyes and gently exhale the smoke, shrouding you in its haze. You only continue peering at me as if you planned to do it for the rest of eternity.
“You still haven’t said anything to her, have you?” you question, head tilted back in a languid manner, eyes already accusing me of something I’d been to afraid to do for way too long.
“You know why I haven’t,” I reply, briefly wondering why you bothered to bring her up.
“Just because she has someone at the moment, it doesn’t mean that she isn’t thinking of a different person.”
And just like that I suddenly remembered who it was I
really wanted. Yes, I was here with you. Yes, we seemed to be incredibly drawn to each other. But I’m not even sure
what it is that I want so much from you… or
why, for that matter. Is it possible to fall in love with somebody when you never fell out of love with somebody else?
“But…”
I trail off, losing sight of what I thought I wanted as I watched you knock back half of your beer. Your eyes meet mine and I don’t know who it is I want more; the girl who I think is the love of my life, or the woman who seems to understand me more than any other being on this planet?
You lean over to me, placing a warm hand on my cheek and drawing me closer until I can feel the world come to a halt, and all I can smell is the menthol smoke you’re exhaling against me.
“If neither of you are willing to do anything, I won’t hesitate to take you for myself.”
Topic: Ramblings of a goosefish (updated 29th july~!) (Read 54677 times)