PART 29
YOSHIZAWA - AUGUST 21ST
I stood outside my front door for about ten minutes before I mustered up the courage enough to go inside. I still didn't know what I was going to do when I saw Miki.
Actually, I didn't even know if Miki would be here. She had run after me, but... after that, maybe she went back to the dressing room... and she and Aya had...
Oh, God, I don't want to think about that.
I stepped inside our home and glanced around. I saw her almost immediately. She was sitting in one of the chairs at the kitchen table, her head propped up by her left arm. Her long hair falling over her face sparkled in the morning sun peeking through the windows. She'd never looked so beautiful to me as she did in that moment. And I'd never hated myself more.
She opened her eyes when I shut the door behind me. She blinked a couple of times and looked around in confusion before her eyes settled on my figure in the doorway. I quickly looked away.
"Yocchan?" she called. By reflex, I looked over at her. I could feel my emotions starting to overwhelm me. I quickly turned away and walked towards the bathroom. "Yossy, please, wait!" The chair scraped against the floor and she ran over to me, grabbing my arm. "I'm sorry, I really am, but it's not what you think. I was just being stupid. Aya doesn't even have a thing for me! She has a crush on you! She tried to say you were the better kisser and, well, I got mad and I'm really sorry but, isn't that funny?" She laughed uncertainly. Of course. Of course it was something so stupid and pointless and... God, what a Miki thing to do.
I wanted to throw up. I wanted to grab her by her shoulders and shake her, demand to know what was so funny about what had happened. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and hold her close, never letting her go, never telling her anything, silencing her questions with kisses. I wanted to blurt out everything, listen to her scream at me, beg her for forgiveness. I wanted to never feel this stupid, this dirty again.
"I need a shower," I finally managed to say. I walked into the bathroom and quietly shut the door behind me.
I was about to lose it. I took a deep breath and turned the shower on just in time to cover my uncontrollable sobbing. I stripped off the clothes I'd taken from Maki's. I threw them carelessly on the floor, wishing I could burn them.
On top of all of this, we had a futsal game in less than two hours. I had to get it together at least long enough to make it through that. I stepped under the forgiving stream of water and tried to calm down. I hugged my chest as I let the water streaming down my face mix with my tears.
"What's going on?" I jumped at the sound of her voice. I opened my mouth to reply, but realized I had nothing I could say to her. We didn't have time to get into it right now.
"I..." I had nothing to say.
"Where were you last night?" she asked slowly, as though she was dreading the reply. I flinched at the question. "Yossy...." Please don't ask me. Please, can't we pretend none of this ever happened? Maybe it didn't happen. Maybe I was reading too much into Maki's words. Maybe she was just...
Then the memory slapped me in the face. Maki, laughing in a low tone, looking right into my eyes and smirking as she ran her hands up my back and unhooked my bra. Oh, God...
I shook my head to clear the memory away and turned the shower off. I would never get clean now.
end.-----------------
Yeah, seriously. That's the end of "100% Kataomoi".
No joke. That's it. There is no part 30 of "100%"
Of course, tomorrow, I'll be posting the first part of "memoir III: memory"