What Really Happened To Her

[JFC]

"Yaguchi-san!"

Nakazawa Yuuko was searching all over the building for the short girl, but she couldn't find her.  Little Mari had gone AWOL.

Well, considering this is "little" Mari, it's not entirely surprising that this happened to Yuko.

"Have you seen Yaguchi-san?  She's about this tall," Nakazawa said, holding her hand at hip level in an exaggerated estimation of Yaguchi Mari's shortness, "with dyed blonde hair.  She's wearing what I'm wearing."

"I know what she looks like," Miki said with a cross between a chuckle and a frown.

It seemed to her that things were about to get interesting.  Nakazawa was acting polite, speaking to her as though she were a stranger.  On top of that, the ex-leader of Morning Musume was wearing a blue police uniform.

Nakazawa checked her watch.

"She was supposed to be on duty half an hour ago.  Where is she?!" she exploded

POLICE BOX SKIT!!!

"Nutty fathers chasing errant daughters, poor families' children causing a ruckus at the local school, drugged up pilgrims from Shikoku... They're all crazy!"

PILGRIMS!

"You can't imagine what I go through every day.  It's a nightmare.  I signed up for the police force, not the zoo!  And now I'm over thirty and nobody wants to marry me!"

Yuko talking about marriage? Uh-oh.

Miki winced.  Nakazawa and conversations about marriage didn't bode well for anyone within a kilometre radius.

Indeed, it's probably better to just avoid the topic altogether if at all possible.

"Well, marriage isn't all it's cracked up to be," Miki said comfortingly.

...

 how can you say that about marriage if you don't even know what it's like to be married?!"

Miki shrugged.

"Okay.  Fine.  It's probably the greatest, happiest thing in the world."

Nakazawa cornered her with a glare.

"Marriage does not equal happiness!" she screeched, jumping up and addressing the heavens.  "A woman can be happy without marriage!"

Yeah...whether in character or just being herself, Yuko's not exactly "all there" once she starts talking about wanting to be married (assuming she really does want it, which in itself is a bit confusing).

Miki sighed and slipped off the windowsill.  So much for spending her afternoon break time daydreaming.  She picked up her book and walked back to her dressing room.  She walked right by Takahashi Ai, who was positioned right beside Miki's door.

"Hi," she greeted the serious girl, and she quickly slipped into her dressing room.

...

No reply.

In fact, there was no movement. 

Huh? Is Aichan spacing out or something?

Upon further inspection, Miki was surprised to note that Ai was standing with one foot on two tomato boxes stacked on top of each other.  Her elbow was rested on her knee, and her chin was rested on her fist.  It looked like she was thinking deeply.

From the description, sounds like she's recreating the pose of "The Thinker"

"I'm talking to you, Takahashi!" she said loudly.

This time Ai blinked, but she remained otherwise still, making it quite evident that she was putting a lot of effort into not moving.

...

"What are you?!  A sculpture?!" Miki shouted into Ai's ear.

"You got it!"

OHHHHHHHHHHHH! Aichan's doing the bit where the girl's had to pretend they were famous paintings and stuff and they had to hold the poses and not move! 

After this brief break, Ai got back into position, this time putting her hands on her cheeks and opening her mouth in a silent scream, a pose that she would hold until Miki came out of her dressing room... which might not be for a long, long time.  She got comfy.

It's the "Home Alone" pose (aka The Scream)!


Aichan's pose =

Miki = 

[chokkan 2]

damn, I miss H!M skits ~

can't wait for more ~~~~

[OTN1]

A1, I love the Nakazawa and Yaguchi police officer skits.  Never a boring moment when Nakazawa's on duty.

Haha, yes.  The "Home Alone" pose.  Interesting name for it.

I've started writing the last chapter of this strange collection of haphazardly arranged stories (please note that they are not in chronological order).  There are still a few more stories that I'd like to try and write before the end, though, so let's see what I can pull out of my mind.

[OTN1]

Narkissos

I sit at my table.  All the light I have comes from one small lamp that sits on the edge of that table.  I hold a ballpoint pen in my hand.  This pen hovers over an unmarked sheet of lined paper, the only other object on the surface of the table.

I block out everything but one train of thought.  I feel the inspiration coming, but if too much overwhelms me, I will lose my focus and not be able to write a single thing.  There will be too much to express.  I will want to tell it all.  Like a gust of wind blowing a printed out, unbound novel.  What owner of such a work would not want to rescue every single page of his novel?  But were he to pursue each sheet of paper simultaneously, he would catch none of them.  Therefore, it is important to have one aim.  One goal.  Cut away everything else.  It is not important.  Only that thing.  The most important thing.

I put the pen to the paper.

Gently in the breeze,
A frog croaks in the rice field.
Come, gentle summer.

I then attach the name of a famous poet at the end of my creation.

...Murakami Kijo

I sit back and look at my verse.

It is perfect.  Just like me.

Another tight burst of inspiration erupts in my brain, and I quickly jot down (in my unfailingly neat handwriting) what I hear in my head.

The rain falling down
Upon my uncovered head.
Signs of spring are here.

...Kawahigashi Hekigodo

From outside of my room I can hear a noise.  Somebody is calling.  Perhaps for me.  I ignore the voice because it is not time to go to school or to catch the bus.  It is still time to compose poetry.

The harvest moon shines
A bitter chill comes forward.
Autumn engulfs us.

...Kobayashi Issa

I rest my hands flat on the table and put my chin upon them, staring across the room and into the full-length mirror I have fixed to the wall so that I can see myself at whatever level I may rest.

Glass is a cold, hard material.  That coldness fills my heart as I peer into the one thing in the world - a mirror - that speaks no lies to me.

"Bitter, chilling wind.  Falling snowflake, frozen lake.  Spirit of winter," I speak aloud, letting words pass through my divine lips for the first time that morning.

I stop and consider myself and my poetry.

Am I not wonderful?  Do I not deserve to use one of the most famous men in our country's history as my nom de plume?

"Matsuo Basho," I whisper before quickly righting myself up and jotting down the poem.

I check my watch.  The minute hand moves as if inspired by my gaze, and it becomes seven thirty-nine am, one minute before I am supposed to leave my home.

I stand up, don my blazer, and pick up a bouquet of flowers.  I slip some change into my left pocket, and then, upon second thought, I fold the paper I have just been writing on and place it gently in my right pocket.  I give my hair one final toss while looking in the mirror, and with that, I leave my room.

I walk down the hallway calmly, slip my shoes on, and am about to step out of the door when someone stops me.

"You're wearing my shoes."

I suppose it must be one of my younger brothers.

I turn around and see a girl who looks to be my age but who is dressed in everyday clothing, not a school uniform.  I do not recognise her, but for some reason she strikes me as someone who would be part of that incredibly wealthy family that just moved in a few houses down the street.  She looks at me with an empty expression - practically a glare - and I can't help but notice an almost invisible scar on the massive plateau of a forehead that she has.  I look back at her blankly, turn around, and leave.  She must be a friend of my brother's.

She protests again, but I shut the door on her.  I can only think of two things.  One is my face.  My handsome face.  The face that all the girls go wild over.  Even that teacher who is always at the bus stop.  She is thirty and even she wants me.  I am perfect, after all.

The other thing I think about is another person.  Such a sad face she always has.  But it is a purifying sadness.  It is a sadness that I understand.  Melancholy is the emotion that inspires me most.  It feels so good to be so miserable.  A perversion, some might claim.  But it is not.  It is the way that humans are built.  Emotionally, we are meant to feel the depths of despair.  It makes the lighter moments so much better.  So much more worth living for.  Thus, this girl I can understand wholeheartedly.  When she cries, I urge her on in my mind, I provide comfort.  I let her know that I understand her.  I sympathise.  I care.  In turn, she gives me her love and worship.  I just hope that one day I can tell her how I feel.  What I want is for her to say that she understands me.  For her to comfort me for a change.

But until that day, I will continue to rescue her from her loneliness, compose for her poetry that I attribute to other artists, and provide her with the physical comfort that I can.

It takes one minute to walk to the bus stop.

But she is not there.

All that is on the pavement is a solitary, brown leaf that has blown off prematurely from a  tree.  I kneel down on one knee, pick up the leaf, and stand back up in one smooth movement, brushing the dirt off my knee.

I study the leaf and I contemplate life.

Mankind.  We really are sad creatures, are we not?

"The harvest moon shines.  A bitter chill comes forward.  Autumn engulfs us," I recite, continuing to look at the leaf as I speak and wondering what great name to attach to my poem this time around.  "Ayanokouji... Fumimaro."

[DO Me DO Me]

Fumimaro-sama  *gush*

[g4rfield]

Fumimaro-samaaaaaaa! *fangirling squeal* 

[Amarghetta]

I rest my hands flat on the table and put my chin upon them, staring across the room and into the full-length mirror I have fixed to the wall so that I can see myself at whatever level I may rest.

Hahaha, Sayu still has a long way to go. Her pocket mirror can't beat this.

I do not recognise her, but for some reason she strikes me as someone who would be part of that incredibly wealthy family that just moved in a few houses down the street.  She looks at me with an empty expression - practically a glare - and I can't help but notice an almost invisible scar on the massive plateau of a forehead that she has.

 
Oh boy, Miki would kill him if she knew about this.
Also, he thinks she's Tsubomi!   

"Ayanokouji... Fumimaro."

KYAAAAAAAH! MAAAAKI... FUMIMARO-SAMAAAA!!! 

[JFC]

I've started writing the last chapter of this strange collection of haphazardly arranged stories

Last?

I put the pen to the paper.

Gently in the breeze,
A frog croaks in the rice field.
Come, gentle summer.

I then attach the name of a famous poet at the end of my creation.

...Murakami Kijo

So THAT'S how Fumimaro came up with them!

I rest my hands flat on the table and put my chin upon them, staring across the room and into the full-length mirror I have fixed to the wall so that I can see myself at whatever level I may rest.

Well, there's a reason he attends the Narcissist high school. 

I turn around and see a girl who looks to be my age but who is dressed in everyday clothing, not a school uniform.  I do not recognise her, but for some reason she strikes me as someone who would be part of that incredibly wealthy family that just moved in a few houses down the street.

Probably ran into Miki (she played the rich daughter Tsubomi-chan).

Besides, it wouldn't be half as entertaining if it was someone other than Miki.

The other thing I think about is another person.  Such a sad face she always has.  But it is a purifying sadness.  It is a sadness that I understand.  Melancholy is the emotion that inspires me most.  It feels so good to be so miserable.  A perversion, some might claim.  But it is not.  It is the way that humans are built.  Emotionally, we are meant to feel the depths of despair.  It makes the lighter moments so much better.  So much more worth living for.  Thus, this girl I can understand wholeheartedly.  When she cries, I urge her on in my mind, I provide comfort.

So then...part of the reason he kept going to Rika's character was because he wanted to be the one to comfort her? Wow, yasashii ne?

I just hope that one day I can tell her how I feel.  What I want is for her to say that she understands me.  For her to comfort me for a change.

Speaking as a straight guy, I gotta say that's pretty damn romantic.

But until that day, I will continue to rescue her from her loneliness, compose for her poetry that I attribute to other artists, and provide her with the physical comfort that I can.

Yeah, I bet...

...


nevermind. Too easy.

But she is not there.

All that is on the pavement is a solitary, brown leaf that has blown off prematurely from a  tree.  I kneel down on one knee, pick up the leaf, and stand back up in one smooth movement, brushing the dirt off my knee.

I study the leaf and I contemplate life.

Mankind.  We really are sad creatures, are we not?

"The harvest moon shines.  A bitter chill comes forward.  Autumn engulfs us," I recite, continuing to look at the leaf as I speak and wondering what great name to attach to my poem this time around.  "Ayanokouji... Fumimaro."

Whoa...

[shindoushiz]

Fumimaro-sama is a regular aristocrat. It has a slight period piece feeling.  Since you did Fumimaro-sama, I kinda want to see all 3 of those boys together in a skit.

[OTN1]

Hahaha, Sayu still has a long way to go. Her pocket mirror can't beat this.

Hahaha, but it was still impressively monstrous.  I think I fell over laughing when she pulled it out of her bag.

[fangirling]

Hahaha!  I knew it.

Shindoushiz, hahaha, yes.  Seeing all three of the Ayanokouji brothers in the same place would be lots of fun!  And yeah, JFC.  Sorry, but it has to end eventually.

[JFC]

Shindoushiz, hahaha, yes.  Seeing all three of the Ayanokouji brothers in the same place would be lots of fun!

3 of them?

Who were the other 2?

[Yuuyami]

One's Warumaro who is the yankii version of Fumimaro (Rika liked him too xD)

And the other is the younger brother who's cute and all the kindergarten girls <3 him xD I can't remember what name they gave him though :<

The Ayanokouji parents are freaking beautiful though *0* (Both played by Maki as well, roffle xD)

[shindoushiz]

Warumaro is the younger brother of Fumimaro. I can't remember if they were twins or not.
The brother in kindergarten is Mashuumaro.
The mother is Maki 30 years old. She and Yuuchan played the rich ladies who dine in restaurants below their class.

[JFC]

Ah right, forgot about the Yankii brother.

There's one in Kindergarten? Damn, haven't seen that one.   Did Maki play him too?

[shindoushiz]

In this page http://soreni.ddo.jp/MM/haromoni/gekijodb/profile/p_goto.html go to No.8.  You'll see the kindergarten brother.

[JFC]

Cool. Thanks.

[OTN1]

Hahaha, well, with all that cleared up, let's continue.

Let's be friends!

One chilly and sunny day, Konno Asami knocked at Fujimoto Miki's dressing room. 

"Yes?" Miki asked as she opened the door.

She was a bit surprised to see Asami standing there alone.  While they had formed a bond out on the playing field during futsal training and games, they didn't see much of each other in their private time at the studio.

"Kon-chan," Miki said, a question in her voice.

"Come on!" Asami said excitedly.  "Let's eat lunch together!"

Miki blinked.  This was abnormal.  The two of them - just the two of them - had never gone for lunch together.  It was a strange request indeed.  Therefore, Miki discounted the possibility of it being just lunch for two.  Asami probably had a group of other people waiting for her.  She was inviting Miki to be polite.

"I'm a bit busy now.  Maybe next time," Miki said.

She was usually a very busy girl, so while it was possible she was declining just because she didn't want to hang out with that particular group, it was also completely feasible that she had a lot of work to finish during lunch time.

"B-but..." Aasami mumbled,

She did something that Miki couldn't believe.  She started to sniffle.

"Er..."

"I can't find Ai-chan, and I don't wanna eat with any of the others."

She bent her head down in submission.

"But it's okay.  I know that people like you are busy.  I'll go and eat lunch alone."

Asami turned around and walked off quietly.  Miki watched her, and somewhere deep inside of her, she knew what she had to do.  Perhaps it was some deep and hidden maternal instinct, or perhaps it was just plain pity because something similar had happened to her once in elementary school, but she called out to Asami.

"Wait," she said.  "I'll go with you.  Let me grab my things."

Asami turned around, a huge smile on her face.  Miki swore that the girl was not capable of showing a depressed face for more than thirty seconds.  She ran to her dresser, grabbed her bag and jacket, and ran back out.

"Where do you want to go?  We've only got, like, half an hour," Miki said after checking her watch.

Asami held out a cloth-wrapped box.

"I brought my lunch.  You didn't?" she asked in awe.

Miki shook her head.

"I didn't have time to make my lunch this morning.  I'm buying something."

The truth was that she had intended to skip lunch in favour of a nap, but Asami didn't need to know that.

Asami's eyes turned starry, and she stared up at Miki in a way that made the older girl uncomfortable.

"I'm so jealous!"

Miki smiled warily and tried to usher Asami into the elevator, the doors having just opened.

"No!  After you," Asami said politely, stepping back and gesturing for Miki to go first.

Miki shrugged and walked through the doors.  Senior idol worship.  She wasn't going to pretend she didn't like it.  She loved it.  But it was weird when it came from someone who should by that point be immune to her charms.

They rode the elevator down in silence, but from time to time, Miki caught Asami staring at her.  It puzzled her.  Asami had never been one of the ones to be infatuated with taciturn Miki, so for her to start suddenly was an oddity.

"Hey, Kon-chan," said, breaking the silence.

"Yes?" Asami asked, looking too eager to please.

"What do you think about this bracelet?"

She pulled a small bag out of her purse and opened it, showing Asami a piece of jewellery.

"It's my friend's birthday next week," Miki said, feeling stupid for talking about it, "and I saw this and thought of her, but I'm not sure if I can give it to her.  It looks kind of c-"

"Woooow!" Asami cried out, hovering over the object in Miki's hand.  "It looks so expensive!"

Miki blinked.

"I was just going to say that I thought it looked a bit cheap."

Asami shook her head emphatically.

"No way!  It looks like something only you could buy!"

Miki frowned outright.

"What do you mean by that?" she queried, wondering if Asami had mistaken her for someone else.

"Well, you've got all that money lying around," Asami gushed.  "Only you could go out and buy such a pretty bracelet for your friend!"

Miki hit Asami lightly on the head.

"Whar are you talking about?  I don't have that much money," she admonished the girl with a chuckle.

"Oh, you're too modest," Asami sighed.  "It's just not like you.  Don't change because I'm not rich like you."

"Asami-chan?" Miki asked.

She wondered if maybe she'd been the one to mistake the identity of her companion.  She spoke using an adult's vocabulary, but she sounded like a very young child.

Asami didn't listen to her.

"After school today, let's play before your mother comes to pick you up, okay?  I promise not to throw sand at you again.  It was an accident.  I didn't mean to get your shoes dirty.  I think if I carry the toys to you, you can sit in your throne and..."

Asami started to ramble on and on and Miki backed away, planting her back against the wall and trying to steady herself with deep breaths.

"Asami-chan.  Play?  School?  My mother?  Hello?" Miki asked, checking what floor they were at.

One more floor before they reached ground level.

Asami looked at Miki, frightened.

"I'm sorry, Tsubomi-chan!" she cried, starting to bow.  "I didn't wanna remind you of that!"

"N... no!" Miki barked.  "No.  I'm not that person.  This is me.  Fujimoto.  Not some rich bitch in fucking nursery school!"

It was the wrong thing to say.  Asami burst out crying at Miki's language.  Miki stared at her as if the wailing girl had grown three horns.  The doors of the elevator chose to open at that moment.

Iida Kaori, Yaguchi Mari, Michishige Sayumi, Kamei Eri, and Niigaki Risa all lay their eyes upon the highly suspicious scene - Asami bawling her eyes out and Miki staring at her disgustedly. 

"Wahh!" Asami cried.

Not bothering to look up, she burst out of the doors and ran away.  Miki huffed but did not give chase.  It was not her style.  She walked nonchalantly out of the elevator as the five waiting girls eyed her guardedly.  She caught Mari's gaze, and instead of explaining herself, she shrugged and made an annoyed face.  The five girls got the hint and got into the elevator without saying a word to the former soloist.

The doors to the elevator closed, and Miki let out an exasperated "arg!"

And this is how Fujimoto Miki's reputation as The Scary Member was further consolidated.

[Sancho]

Let me be the first one to say this to you.   AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
That was great. It only show how "normal" Miki is around her "weird" co worker (*cough *Eri* Cough*) . 

[JFC]

"Kon-chan," Miki said, a question in her voice.

"Come on!" Asami said excitedly.  "Let's eat lunch together!"

Miki blinked.  This was abnormal.  The two of them - just the two of them - had never gone for lunch together.  It was a strange request indeed.

Strange-smange. It's Konkon and FOOD!

Miki discounted the possibility of it being just lunch for two.  Asami probably had a group of other people waiting for her.  She was inviting Miki to be polite.

"I'm a bit busy now.  Maybe next time," Miki said.

She was usually a very busy girl, so while it was possible she was declining just because she didn't want to hang out with that particular group, it was also completely feasible that she had a lot of work to finish during lunch time.

Aw...

"B-but..." Aasami mumbled,

She did something that Miki couldn't believe.  She started to sniffle.

"Er..."

"I can't find Ai-chan, and I don't wanna eat with any of the others."

She bent her head down in submission.

"But it's okay.  I know that people like you are busy.  I'll go and eat lunch alone."

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...Konkon...

"Wait," she said.  "I'll go with you.  Let me grab my things."

YAY! 

Asami turned around, a huge smile on her face.  Miki swore that the girl was not capable of showing a depressed face for more than thirty seconds.

 

"I brought my lunch.  You didn't?" she asked in awe.

Miki shook her head.

"I didn't have time to make my lunch this morning.  I'm buying something."

The truth was that she had intended to skip lunch in favour of a nap, but Asami didn't need to know that.

Well, naps are good. Miki could dream about groping the girls while she snoozed.   Still though, skipping lunch would leave her extra hungry (and probably make her cranky) for the remainder of the day.

Asami's eyes turned starry, and she stared up at Miki in a way that made the older girl uncomfortable.

"I'm so jealous!"

Eh?

Jealous of what? The fact that Miki was going to buy her lunch?

Senior idol worship.  She wasn't going to pretend she didn't like it.  She loved it.  But it was weird when it came from someone who should by that point be immune to her charms.

Oh well, Miki-sama is just gonna have to roll with it. 

"Hey, Kon-chan," said, breaking the silence.

"Yes?" Asami asked, looking too eager to please.

"What do you think about this bracelet?"

She pulled a small bag out of her purse and opened it, showing Asami a piece of jewellery.

"It's my friend's birthday next week," Miki said, feeling stupid for talking about it, "and I saw this and thought of her, but I'm not sure if I can give it to her.  It's looks kind of c-"

She bought for Aya's birthday? 

"Woooow!" Asami cried out, hovering over the object in Miki's hand.  "It looks so expensive!"

Miki blinked.

"I was just going to say that I thought it looked a bit cheap."

Asami shook her head emphatically.

"No way!  It looks like something only you could buy!"

Miki frowned outright.

"What do you mean by that?" she queried, wondering if Asami had mistaken her for someone else.

"Well, you've got all that money lying around," Asami gushed.  "Only you could go out and buy such a pretty bracelet for your friend!"

HAH??? 

"Oh, you're too modest," Asami sighed.  "It's just not like you.  Don't change because I'm not rich like you."

"Asami-chan?" Miki asked.

...

"After school today, let's play before your mother comes to pick you up, okay?  I promise not to throw sand at you again.  It was an accident.  I didn't mean to get your shoes dirty.  I think if I carry the toys to you, you can sit in your throne and..."

Asami started to ramble on and on and Miki backed away, planting her back against the wall and trying to steady herself with deep breaths.

OH!!!

It's Konkon's little "schoolgirl-that-wants-to-be-friends-with-Miki's-Tsubomi/rich girl-character"!!!   


BTW...
Konkon = 
Miki =

"N... no!" Miki barked.  "No.  I'm not that person.  This is me.  Fujimoto.  Not some rich bitch in fucking nursery school!"

It was the wrong thing to say.  Asami burst out crying at Miki's language.  Miki stared at her as if the wailing girl had grown three horns.

Konkon =
Miki = 

The doors of the elevator chose to open at that moment.

Iida Kaori, Yaguchi Mari, Michishige Sayumi, Kamei Eri, and Niigaki Risa all lay their eyes upon the highly suspicious scene - Asami bawling her eyes out and Miki staring at her disgustedly.

Somehow, it ALWAYS has to happen to Miki-sama, doesn't it?

[Sukoshi]

LOL thank you for more of your awesomeness~ 

Let me be the first one to say this to you.   AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
That was great. It only show how "normal" Miki is around her "weird" co worker (*cough *Eri* Cough*) . 

You just gave me the strangest thought   It would be so much fun if there was a chapter on Eric hitting on Miki