It’s official: The Champ is back!
I interviewed Masa today and he did indeed confirm his comeback. Here’s the whole controversial interview!
Vic Mackey: First of all what makes you think that you can join the Struggle at this point? The contest started two weeks ago, right?
Masa: Lemme make one thing clear, son. I can join whenever I want! I am the brains behind The Struggle. Without me there would be no Struggle!
Vic Mackey: Your mom must be proud you…
Masa: Besides I have been strugglin’ unofficially since December 5th. I started training when The Struggle started so this is actually the 14th day for me.
Vic Mackey: Sounds like you’re eligible after all.
Masa: Hell yeah!
Vic Mackey: So what made you join again? Weren’t you supposed to retire after The Struggle 2006?
Masa: Stupidity! Nah, just kidding. “Can’t leave rap alone, the game needs me”, like my homie Jay-Z once said. Ya heard! To be honest at first I didn’t wanna do it. I was tired, unmotivated and out of shape. I was like Rocky in Rocky III. I had totally lost my eye of the tiger….
Vic Mackey: Good thing you still have plenty of that stupidity left….
Masa: I wanna entertain people. You have no idea how sadistic people are nowadays, they actually love seeing me suffer.
Vic Mackey: Maybe it’s because you’re an asshole…
Masa: I went through a rough two week long training camp and now I’m finally ready. I have been teasing myself with all kinds of hot stuff and yesterday I finally made the decision. I wanted to play it safe and make sure that I can go through all this bullshit again. Now I'm feeling like Rocky in Rocky II! Anyways I don’t think my fans would want to see me fail….
Vic Mackey: What fans?
Masa: The Struggle just ain’t the same without me. That’s the bottom-line. My comeback will be even bigger than Jay-Z’s comeback. And my comeback ain’t gonna suck!
Vic Mackey: Riiiiight…. anyways next question, what has been the biggest surprise so far?
Masa: One word: daigong. I never thought he would beat his previous record, three days. It’s fucking amazing that he’s still in the game after two weeks. I bet he chopped his cock off or something. He’s that fucking desperate to beat me. Anyways dude is so pathetic that he will find a way to fail the Struggle even without his penis.
Vic Mackey: Daigong is a punk, for sure. So what has been the biggest disappointment so far?
Masa: All the girls except shirenu. Who would have thought that our girls are even hornier than the guys? Shirenu won’t be the only girl scoring the annual “Elaine award” this year. My homie arun disappointed me as well. Dude failed before I even joined the game! Dude totally lost his swagger after last year’s epic failure. Also tenkei showed us that he’s nothing more than a one-time wonder. The so called “cheer team” has been weak too, they haven’t done any damage at all. Them dudes better step their game up if they really wanna make people fail….
Vic Mackey: Now that you’re back who’s your #1 opponent?
Masa: I know everybody expects me to say daigong but nah, he ain’t shit! His failure is only a matter of time. I had a little chat with him and dude’s ready to give up. He was sounding all pathetic and I think he even cried a lil’ bit. There’s no way he’s gonna win anything this year. He’s ready to pull a Kramer, dude’s done! He's finished! I actually hope that daigong lasts a little longer so that his failure will be even more epic. Anyways I don’t see the other contestants as my opponents simply because they ain’t on my level. Masa fears no man!
Vic Mackey: Any last words?
Masa: Yeah! I got my swagger back, bitches! Jesus and 2pac never came back but I did! This is the biggest event of the year! JPH!P is fo' da kids!
Vic Mackey: Just shut the fuck up already.
Topic: THE STRUGGLE 2007: CYCLE 3 ~Skeet! Skeet! Skeet!~ (ENDS 01/01/08...NSFW) (Read 121385 times)