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Author Topic: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 2]  (Read 10257 times)

Offline rokun

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白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 2]
« on: December 05, 2008, 03:14:40 PM »
Yeah yeah, some of you may ask "Why is he starting a new story?" Well, unlike some other writers here I don't have a compilation thread since I don't write short stories really, so I figure I'll make up for it a bit by number of other stories posted? XD Anyway, I got the motivation to do something new while bored in class today, and took notes during down times, and... this is the result. I hope you enjoy, and I'm sorry if this prologue is a little confusing with how it's written - I tried to make it as clear as possible (and I think it works pretty well - if you keep reading it'll make more sense as it goes along!), and from chapter 1 on it'll definitely get clearer. :) However, there are times this story won't take itself seriously, and this is one of them. Hopefully you'll pick up on that. ;) Cheers!


白童丸物語
The Tale of the Hakudo Maru



Prologue

A young woman woke from a dreamless sleep to find herself draped over the arm of a soft leather chair as if she’d somehow passed out as she sat. Her senses returned to her slowly, with the first thing she noticed being a shrill repetitive “beep…beep…” coming from somewhere near her. Wondering if that was what had woken her, she wanted to figure out how to turn it off, but the rest of her faculties were yet to be at her command.

Eventually she managed to open her eyes, although when she did so she found herself still staring into only blackness. But as they focused, she realized the blackness wasn’t pure – it was dotted by hundreds of pinpricks of light that would float slowly toward her until they seemed to pass in a flash. She wondered if she was falling through nowhere – although that would be strange on a chair – until she realized there was a soft light that illuminated the space immediately around her.

Finding the strength to turn her head, she realized that the blackness she had been staring at was just presented by a huge screen in front of her, and she was actually in the center of a large room, stairs on either side of her leading up from a space just below her to another above. There were two other chairs to either side of her at the same level half-way up the stairs, and even more arranged in a symmetrical, orderly pattern both below and above. Squinting, she noticed through the dimness that there were other people in most of the chairs, and even some on the floor, all of them having apparently fallen asleep… or passed out… just as she likely had.

Now able to move the rest of her body, she sat up in the chair to get a better look around. The beeping apparently was coming from some type of console behind her and to the left, in front of which a dark figure lay sprawled in one of the chairs, but in general the soft flashing of the lights and the layout of the room presented a pleasing ambience. There was only one problem.

She had no idea where she was, or why she was there.

“H-hello?” she asked in a slightly tremulous voice as she looked around at the silence around her that was quickly becoming eerie despite the room’s natural atmosphere. “Is anyone awake in here?” After looking around for another moment, she followed up in a quieter voice, “…Is anyone alive in here…?”

She had become so used to the silence that when something other than the droning beeping broke it, she nearly jumped out of her chair. A moan came from the chair next to the beeping panel above her, and after her initial shock, her eyes snapped up to it, though at first she saw nothing but the back of the chair. Eventually she saw a hand appear to the side of it, and so she decided that whoever was sitting there was just too short to be otherwise visible.

“Hello?” she asked again. She wasn’t sure whether she wanted to meet someone or not given the situation, but at this point it looked like she couldn’t help it.

“Oh…” the mystery person said in a quiet voice, but loud enough for her to tell it was also a girl. “My head hurts...”

“Are you all right?” she asked, now slightly concerned. She felt her forehead. The other must have a different problem, because her head felt fine.

“I guess so,” the apparently short girl responded. “As long as my head doesn’t split open while I sit here.”

“You think it will?” she asked, now a little frantic. She didn’t know what she’d do if someone’s head split open in front of her.

There was a pause before the next response. “No,” came the reply. “I think that’s just an expression. But I can’t remember very well… It just came to me…”

“Can’t remember?” she asked again, her mind whirring through the emptiness that seemed to be her memories. “I can’t seem to remember things very well either. Like where we are… why we’re here…”

Finally the other girl turned around slowly in her chair and rose, her hand still at her head. As she had thought, the girl was short, and also had short jet-black hair. She felt at her own hair and looked at it, wondering if it was black as well. Instead, it seemed rather brownish.

Above a finely-pleated knee-length skirt, the girl wore a slightly rumpled but still clean-looking white shirt with an impressive and professional looking jacket over it, four glittering silver beads at the shoulder reflecting what dim light there was. Realizing she was wearing something very similar, she felt at her own shoulder. On it there were five beads.

The short girl was looking at her with piercing eyes that seemed to betray a deep intelligence behind them. She felt self-conscious looking back into them. “Who are you?” short girl asked.

She opened her mouth to respond, but nothing came out. Instead, she opened and closed it a couple times before finally admitting quietly, and a little terrified, “I don’t know… Who are you?”

Short girl stared back at her a moment. “I don’t know…” she responded finally.

Just then they were interrupted by another sound of movement from the lower front section of the room, and seeing short girl’s eyes slide past her to look that direction, she spun around as well. A small, wispy-looking younger girl – also with short hair – was sitting up from where her head had lain on a panel in front of her chair, which was along with two others the closest to the large screen where the pinpricks of light flashed past.

The two who had been conversing were quiet until the newly awakened girl turned back, giving a jolt upon seeing them. Then the girl literally jumped out of her chair. “What’s going on!?” the girl shouted, making her wince at the loudest noise she’d heard yet since wakening. “Who are you people?!”

“Take it easy,” she said in what was surprisingly a calming-sounding voice. “I think we’re all in the same position. Nobody remembers anything.”

The other girl didn’t seem to register her words for a moment and just looked around wildly before jerking upon seeing the one in the seat next to her also with her head on the panel before her, and another one in front that somehow seemed to be sitting upright but hadn’t yet moved. Then the girl started running toward the back of the room to what looked like a door, and banged at the panel next to it. “This is too much!” she yelled, and as the door slid open ran through it and out of sight.

“Well she’s certainly energetic…” short girl commented as they both looked after with slightly open mouths. Yes, she thought, that girl was definitely genki…

They didn’t have to wait much longer though before the rest of the girls around them – they all were girls apparently – started waking up one by one, and as she took count she realized there were six of them. That was, six and the one who only sat upright and still near the front panel.

“Ano…” one girl, which she had named “thin girl” for the time being mostly because of her legs that showed beneath her pleated skirt, said as she reached out a hand to the prone form. She had also taken note that this girl had only three of the silver beads sewn onto her shoulder.

Upon poking the figure, thin girl quickly pulled back her hand and nearly jumped back a step as well, though there was no more movement.

“Is… is she alive?” asked another girl – “longhaired girl” – who had been one of the ones sitting in the chairs closest to her, and also for some reason not in front of a panel like the rest. The same as the other closest to her, “athletic girl”, she had four beads, which she was beginning to suspect signified some kind of rank. However, that prospect frightened her slightly since she seemed to have the most of anyone. The sixth girl that had already awoken and joined them had the least yet – just one – but even though she didn’t get a good look, she suspected the genki girl who ran away had just one as well.

“I’m not sure…” thin girl responded to longhaired girl’s question. “But it looks like her eyes are open… and aside from well, not moving, it looks like she could just be enjoying the view…” Giving thin girl a better look as the girl spoke and twirled a finger in her relatively long brown hair, she realized that one was the only one whose shirt wasn’t tucked in. Looking at it just hanging out over her skirt, she somehow had the urge to reprimand the girl for it, but suppressed it for the moment.

“Poke her again,” long-haired girl said, and looking at her now she realized this was someone who was used to giving orders… and having them followed.

Despite thin girl’s somewhat wild appearance she did as the other asked, but this time when she poked she really did jump back, even uttering a small cry, because the sitting girl’s head turned in her direction.

“Hello,” strange girl said in a friendly voice that didn’t seem tired at all. Then she looked around in an oddly jerky manner at the others in the room, appearing slightly puzzled. “What is everyone looking at?”

There was silence for a moment as the addressed girls exchanged glances, but just as she noticed that there only seemed to be five of them now, a beep from behind drew their attention all at once.

Short girl was at a panel in the back wall, and appeared to be frowning down at it in concentration. “What are you doing?” long-haired girl asked in a somewhat suspicious voice.

Focusing her attention now curiously on short girl, she got up from her chair in the middle for the first time – drawing the looks of everyone else except strange girl, who was still peering around as if everything was somehow fascinating – and walked over to see what short girl was up to.

“Hey,” she said, looking down at the flashing panel. She expected some kind of jerky reaction considering how jumpy all of them seemed to be, but short girl just calmly peered up at her. Apparently this was someone not easily ruffled.

As she looked past short girl to the flashing panel, she noticed it presented information that was somehow becoming clear to her. At least she apparently didn’t forget how to read. “Did you find something?” she asked, resting a hand to the side of the panel to lean down for a better look.

“Yes,” short girl said, looking around as she realized the others had come up behind as well. Then she looked back down to join her looking at the panel. “It’s some information on this… vessel… that we seem to be in.”

“Vessel?” thin girl asked. “You mean this is some kind of ship?”

“A space ship, I would say from what it looks like on that screen there…” the girl with one bead said, looking back at it. Deciding it was probably rather rude to identify the girl by her only having one bead, she decided to give the girl another name. Looking at the well-built-looking arm that pointed to the screen, she decided “strong girl” was a much more flattering nickname. She sighed. This was getting ridiculous… They needed to somehow find out their names soon… or at least something better to call each other…

Thin girl whistled through her teeth at the revelation. “A space ship, huh? That sounds like pretty heavy shit…” The others blinked at the girl’s use of language, but thin girl just peered around at them as if wondering why they were all looking at her.

“The vessel’s name seems to be the Hakudo Maru,” short girl continued as if it was that easy to ignore the rest. “There’s not a whole lot written in this article, but there is one other useful piece of information… the name of the Captain…”

She felt her face flush upon hearing that, and as she slowly rose she realized that the others, aside from short girl still focused on the monitor, were now all looking at her. Or, more precisely, at the five beads sewn onto her shoulder. Apparently they had come to the same conclusion she had in regard to their meaning. Everyone around her was obviously quite astute and capable, despite nobody being able to remember their names.

Finally short girl looked up at her as well, the four beads on her shoulder sparkling in the soft lamp light illuminating the panel. “I take it that would be you, no? I wish I could introduce myself properly as well, but it’s nice to meet you, Ai Takahashi.”
« Last Edit: December 20, 2008, 04:56:47 PM by rokun »

Offline Estrea

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru
« Reply #1 on: December 05, 2008, 03:50:19 PM »
Interesting story! I can't wait to see what had actually happened to them. Hehe. By the way, I'm curious as to how you came up with this idea in class. =P

I shall make no attempt to guess who is who, although of course I have some suspicions. XD Shall wait for further developments. Keep it up rokun~ ^_^

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Offline ShikyoxYaiba

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru
« Reply #2 on: December 05, 2008, 07:38:55 PM »
Gah!! This definitely draws my interest.  I've got a little inkling of who is who, but I'm nowhere near ready to guess yet.  Very interesting idea...  I can't wait for the next installment. =D Good luck~ *hands you an extra hard hat*

Offline JFC

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru
« Reply #3 on: December 05, 2008, 08:38:56 PM »
Prologue

Quote
There was only one problem.

She had no idea where she was, or why she was there.
Uh-oh. :O

Memory loss?



Quote
“H-hello?” she asked in a slightly tremulous voice as she looked around at the silence around her that was quickly becoming eerie despite the room’s natural atmosphere. “Is anyone awake in here?” After looking around for another moment, she followed up in a quieter voice, “…Is anyone alive in here…?”
Oh man, why is it that the first instinct is usually the most grim one?  :-X



Quote
“Can’t remember?” she asked again, her mind whirring through the emptiness that seemed to be her memories. “I can’t seem to remember things very well either. Like where we are… why we’re here…”

...


The short girl was looking at her with piercing eyes that seemed to betray a deep intelligence behind them. She felt self-conscious looking back into them. “Who are you?” short girl asked.

She opened her mouth to respond, but nothing came out. Instead, she opened and closed it a couple times before finally admitting quietly, and a little terrified, “I don’t know… Who are you?”

Short girl stared back at her a moment. “I don’t know…” she responded finally.
Yep...memory loss. Question now is...what caused it?



Quote
They didn’t have to wait much longer though before the rest of the girls around them – they all were girls apparently – started waking up one by one, and as she took count she realized there were six of them. That was, six and the one who only sat upright and still near the front panel.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...stranger and stranger.



Quote
As she looked past short girl to the flashing panel, she noticed it presented information that was somehow becoming clear to her. At least she apparently didn’t forget how to read. “Did you find something?” she asked, resting a hand to the side of the panel to lean down for a better look.

“Yes,” short girl said, looking around as she realized the others had come up behind as well. Then she looked back down to join her looking at the panel. “It’s some information on this… vessel… that we seem to be in.”

“Vessel?” thin girl asked. “You mean this is some kind of ship?”
Oooooooooooooooooooooooh...Sci-Fi. In that case, their memory loss could be the result of some time of weapon or strange alien virus. :?



Quote
“The vessel’s name seems to be the Hakudo Maru,” short girl continued as if it was that easy to ignore the rest. “There’s not a whole lot written in this article, but there is one other useful piece of information… the name of the Captain…”

She felt her face flush upon hearing that, and as she slowly rose she realized that the others, aside from short girl still focused on the monitor, were now all looking at her. Or, more precisely, at the five beads sewn onto her shoulder. Apparently they had come to the same conclusion she had in regard to their meaning. Everyone around her was obviously quite astute and capable, despite nobody being able to remember their names.

Finally short girl looked up at her as well, the four beads on her shoulder sparkling in the soft lamp light illuminating the panel. “I take it that would be you, no? I wish I could introduce myself properly as well, but it’s nice to meet you, Ai Takahashi.”
Ok, I know it's just the prologue, but this SO reminds me of the ST:TNG episode "Conundrum". :lol:
http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/Conundrum_%28episode%29

JPH!P :heart:'s kuro808, Fushigidane, ChrNo, Jab & marimari. Always.

Offline Amarghetta

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru
« Reply #4 on: December 05, 2008, 10:51:13 PM »
I'm so used to your stories about Berryz, and I was trying to pair the descriptions with them at first... And even if I read it all over again, I cannot figure out who all of them are. :/

Still, I'll certainly come back for more. :)
« Last Edit: December 06, 2008, 02:50:55 AM by Amarghetta »

Offline Fenrir

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru
« Reply #5 on: December 06, 2008, 01:59:36 AM »
Sci-fi H!P! Cool! :D

Hmm... I know you mostly focus on Berryz, but with Ai-chan as Captain I can't figure out who's who. XD Well, I have a few hunches, but... XD

Offline strawb3rrykream

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru
« Reply #6 on: December 06, 2008, 05:03:25 PM »
Wow,now this seems quite interesting. I wonder why they can't remember anything....and why they are in a spaceship.
I'm very into this!


Offline Maimi_Yajima

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru
« Reply #7 on: December 07, 2008, 01:47:54 AM »
oh.
new history. Many congratulations on that.
The principle is confusing and does not understand much.
but ...
I suppose that eventually I'll understand the story.
You do not reveal much ...
This  is so common now in you.
well ...
I can only wait.
I hope that the "Elder Club" Have appearance here.
the beginning of his story is interesting.
has good style.
Luck in their studies, good luck in his life and luck in his writings.

Ah ...
Thanks for writing stories and share them.
See you later!



" a look can say more than words" and " a look can even denude the heart"

Offline ringo-hime

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru
« Reply #8 on: December 07, 2008, 04:16:37 AM »
wow.  
pretty much confused.  :P
but i like it. i cnt wait to know moar. :D

Offline rokun

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru
« Reply #9 on: December 11, 2008, 11:51:31 AM »
Thanks for the comments you guys! Especially since it's only the prologue so far without much happening  yet. :) And JFC, after your post I realized I've watched waaay too much Star Trek in my life. XD Don't read too much into that comment though lol, at least as far as this story's concerned. ;)

Anyway, here's the first chapter! All of you have been guessing who's who, and some of you have even done well considering the small amount of information, but this should answer a lot of questions. :) I say a lot... but there are still far more to go as you'll see. ;) Anyway, hope you enjoy, and until next time. ^^


Chapter 1

Seven girls stared at each other over a table they’d found in a room adjoining what was apparently a command center for flying whatever ship they were in. The girl the others were more than happy to acknowledge as the Captain drummed her fingers slowly on the hard wood. Takahashi Ai, they had called her. She supposed she could live with that name – for some reason it felt right, perhaps something left over from the memories that still hadn’t returned.

That was, everyone was happy to let her be the Captain except for a certain long-haired girl who seemed comfortable giving orders. Ai thought that perhaps she just didn’t want someone giving her orders herself. Still, it was rather uncomfortable, because the girl kept looking at her the whole time as if the situation was somehow her fault. Then again, for all she knew it might have been.

The stiffly sitting girl also didn’t stare calmly like all the rest, her head jerking around almost unnaturally the whole time as if everything that was within sight was just amazing. Ai looked around herself. The room they were in wasn’t quite as nice as the command area – “bridge” she somehow remembered it was called – but she supposed it served its purpose well enough, with a stand to one side with a pitcher on it as if to serve tea, and comfortable enough chairs.

“Well the good news is…” the athletic girl said, fiddling with a computerized notebook in front of her, “I think I’ve almost found a list containing the names of all the command staff of… our… ship. It’s happening slowly, but I’m remembering how to access it all. Still, there’s a password needed for the full crew and civilian files which my mind is completely blank on, so unless I find a textpad with the password scribbled onto it, we may only have our names to go by for a while.”

“How many others do you think are on this ship?” short girl asked. Ai would definitely be glad to soon have names for these girls who she had a feeling she should know as well as the palm of her own hand.

“I can’t be sure without the full data…” the other responded, “But for some reason I know it’s a large number. Plus, remember the hyper girl who ran away earlier still hasn’t returned, so there must be a lot of places in here to go.”

“Anyone up for exploring the ship?” thin girl asked with a wry grin. “It’ll be like a metaphorical adventure in our own backyard… only without the metaphor…”

“I wouldn’t mind doing that,” athletic girl responded, still tapping away at the datapad’s touch screen.

“You seem very concerned about the crew,” short girl commented astutely, looking at the other with a slightly narrow-eyed, considering gaze. “If we are going by those beads as indicators of rank, it would seem you, she,” she listed off, pointing also to long-haired girl, “and I are of a similar level, and second only to Captain Takahashi. That is, if no one else of higher rank is on board.”

“If I may,” Ai said quietly with a slightly raised hand as if she wasn’t the one apparently in charge, “I believe no one will be. My memories of many things aren’t clear, but the senior command staff shouldn’t be too large a number on a ship like this, and they would also be stationed on the bridge, where we all woke up, so if you find a list of command staff, I think we’ll be it.”

“As the Captain says,” long-haired girl commented, giving her one of those looks again. Ai decided to stay quiet for the moment. She had the feeling she was one of those Captains that preferred to delegate most matters to her specialized staff, taking part generally when executive attention was needed.

“Point noted,” short girl said with a gracious nod. Ai was definitely getting the impression this was a rather analytical person. “Where I was headed with my logic was that our colleague here seems very knowledgeable on personnel matters – I tried to look up more than I found at first, but had no clue where to start – so it made me wonder if those of us of similar rank have similarly distributed responsibilities, such as one in charge of personnel, as well as one in charge, if I may say so,” she said, pointing to herself, “of more technical matters.”

“And where does that leave me?” long-haired girl asked, seeming to get a little impatient, though doing well at holding her outward calm.

Short girl was silent on that point, but a thought suddenly came to Ai and words left her mouth almost before she realized she’d opened it. “First officer…” she said, staring at the girl whose position she named. She didn’t know where exactly the thought came to her from, but it certainly made sense – used to giving orders but not the Captain; if the Captain delegated a lot of the time, what would make more sense than her first officer?

“First officer, huh?” the girl said, tasting the sound of the words as her mood seemed to quickly be improving.

“I think that would make sense on a ship like this…” short girl said, now surveying both the first officer and Ai, who were exchanging glances.

“I guess that means you and I would be close, wouldn’t it?” long-haired girl said, smiling crookedly. “It’s funny though that I get the feeling we don’t get along all that well…”

“If we got along perfectly, then there would be no second-guessing of each other’s decisions,” Ai said, once again before hardly thinking. “The best Captain/First Officer relationships are those where disagreements are common, to make sure as correct a decision as possible is always arrived at.”

“Somehow I think our Captain is quite capable,” thin girl said, still grinning. Ai was beginning to wonder if the girl did that all the time.

“Aha, I have it!” came a sudden voice a good bit louder than the rest, making all of them flinch unconsciously. “The command crew manifest!”

“Oh, that’s all?” long-haired girl remarked, gripping the table in front of her hard. “By your tone I was afraid we were under attack…”

“What?” the other girl said, blinking up at them, but the others just laughed.

Ai took the chance to catch a glance at the two girls who hadn’t spoken yet. One was still seemingly trying to take in every detail of the room, as well as each of them, while the other was silent and just watching, though in her opinion, watching rather studiously. Ai’s gaze lingered on the single bead on her shoulder before turning to athletic girl as she began to list off names. Hopefully this was the last time she’d have to think of one of them like that…

“There is of course Captain Takahashi,” she said, frowning down at her datapad. “Though it must be Captain’s privilege or something, but I can’t find anything more about her than her name and position.” Everyone stole a glance at said Captain a second, but she just gave a ‘what-can-you-do?’ shrug in response.

“Then, in order of ship’s standing, there’s First Officer, Commander Risa Niigaki. I guess that would be you, eh?” she said, looking up to long-haired girl.

“Sounds good to me…” the girl replied, seeming satisfied enough for the moment.

“Then, there’s Science Officer, Commander Saki Shimizu.” Everyone nodded to short girl as if it was suddenly as clear as day. Ai thought the girl had done a good job of noticing their relative positions. “And Personnel Officer, Commander Maimi Yajima. I guess that’s me, eh?” she said, raising an eyebrow. Nobody voiced an objection.

“Then we have three Lieutenant Commanders, although I don’t think they’re all here…” She didn’t look up, but the eyes of the rest of the girls flickered to the three beads on thin girl’s shoulder. She was the only one present with that number. “Listed first are Momoko Tsugunaga and Miyabi Natsuyaki, with their positions as engineers. Perhaps another section?” Ai nodded, and she didn’t think she was the only one. Together with impression of the girl’s words, the memories seemed to rise back into her mind. “Then there’s Reina Tanaka, Tactical Officer. You, huh?” she asked, looking up again momentarily at short girl.

“Tactical…” Tanaka responded. “I like that. That means I get to blow things up, right?”

“Hopefully not too many things,” Niigaki commented dourly. “We’re not going to be in shape for many battles for a while I think. If that’s even what this ship is designed for, and somehow I have a feeling it isn’t.”

Ai pondered on the girl’s words. Now that she mentioned it, she got a similar feeling. This was not a battleship sent out in some kind of war, of that she was somehow sure. Still, that made her wonder even more at what their reason was for being where they were, and especially in the present situation they seemed to be in.

“Then we also have three Lieutenants,” Yajima went on, seeming fascinated by nothing else than the names and information showing on the device in her hand. “Although one is not actually part of the command staff – Saki Nakajima, listed as ship’s doctor. There’s also another Engineer, Airi Suzuki, and then there’s Operations Officer… Eri Kamei…”

Everyone turned to look at the stiffly sitting girl with two beads, and apparently under the scrutiny she was distracted from her perusal of the room and looked around at the rest of them. “My name is Eri Kamei?” she asked. The others blinked. How could she have actually been paying attention to what they were saying? “Nice to meet you.” She smiled, and suddenly seemed to become calmer.

Niigaki gave Ai a long, wry glance, to which Ai only shrugged again. The Lieutenant was definitely strange, but there must have been a reason she was assigned to the bridge crew, and she seemed rather adept at picking up things the others missed, attention to detail that Ai thought would be very important, especially in a position such as Operations.

“That leaves me out I guess, huh?” the last unnamed girl said, smiling resignedly at the others. “And Miss Escapee too. Hopefully you’ll be able to find that password before too long.”

“Well we’ll have to give you some kind of name for the time being,” Ai said, in an attempt to be comforting. “I can’t keep calling you ‘strong girl’ all the time, especially when trying to command a ship.”

“Strong girl?” the other asked, a half-grin twisting her mouth.

“Don’t tell me you gave us all names like that…” Niigaki said, rolling her eyes. Ai clicked her teeth shut. Was she always this bad with words?

“Ooh,” Tanaka cooed. “What was my name? I bet it was a fun one. Better than Reina. I can’t really find myself saying that much at all…”

“Well, I was going to identify you by your long hair, but I noticed Niigaki first…”

“Long hair? Geez Captain, you sure come up with the lamest nicknames…” said Niigaki commented.

“Excuse me…” Ai said in a sardonically affronted voice.

“It’s really okay, I can live with Strong Girl,” the lone nameless one said quickly.

“Nah, she’s right,” Niigaki said. “We need a better name for you. How about… Ichigo? That’s cute.”

“Ensign Ichigo?” Ai asked skeptically.

“Ensign?” Tanaka asked.

“I think our honorable Captain is remembering some things about ranks…” Yajima said with a small smile.

“Ok, Ichigo it is!” Niigaki confirmed. Ai glanced at her. Had the girl actually thought she was agreeing with her? Something so dainty didn’t seem to fit this girl at all…

Ichigo looked like she was about to protest, but suddenly the ship jolted, and the girls almost fell out of their chairs. After giving each other quick glances, they just as quickly rose and hurried back to the bridge.

Upon arriving and looking at the screen, Ai noticed that the stars weren’t flying by nearly as quickly any longer, and in fact had almost become still. “Can somebody figure out what’s going on?” she asked no one in particular, still not sure who would prosecute such a task.

“The engines have stalled, and the ship is nearing a full stop,” Kamei said from her panel in front of the screen. Ai blinked, rather surprised at the girl’s response and seeming togetherness in the situation. Actually, she seemed the calmest of any of them, quickly going about her business of checking on the engines. She’d have to keep that in mind about the girl in the future.

“Confirmed,” Shimizu agreed. “There is no longer any power to the engines. Reason unknown as of now.”

Then, a crackling sound as of static became audible, and an unfamiliar high-pitched voice broke around them. “Hello? This is… Well, I don’t know who I am, but I’m in engineering. Is anyone out there?”

“Yes,” Ai said before anyone else could. Niigaki gave her an unreadable look. “We’re all here. At least I think so. This is Captain Ai Takahashi. As for you… If you’re in engineering, I think we could probably let you know, right?” she asked, looking to Yajima who gave a curt nod. “How many beads do you have on your uniform?”

“Um… three…” came the voice.

This time, before Ai could respond Yajima cut in, still studying her datapad from her perch in the chair to the right of Ai’s. “Then you would be either Lieutenant Commander Tsugunaga or Natsuyaki. Hmm, tell me, are you short?”

“Um…” was the only response from the other end, until another, lower pitched voice broke in.

“Yes, she is short,” the new voice said. “Hello, I suppose I would be one of your Lieutenant Commanders as well.”

Yajima nodded over her datapad. “Hello. That would make you Natsuyaki, and the one who spoke first Tsugunaga. It’s nice to meet you, though I can’t help but feel that I’m somehow failing in my job by saying that…”

“So…” Niigaki said, looking to Ai as if for approval to go on. In response, Ai just nodded quickly, and Niigaki went on with a smile, “This is Commander Niigaki. What seems to be the trouble with the engines?”

“Well,” Tsugunaga said, “We don’t think there’s anything wrong with them. It’s just that…”

“The… Lieutenant…?” Natsuyaki followed up, “down here spilled her coffee on one of the control panels. You see, we were all having trouble waking up, so…”

“It wasn’t my fault!” came a fainter voice of protest. “The ship jolted, and… and…”

“Yeah yeah,” Natsuyaki said, her voice a bit muffled as well as if speaking away from the receiver. “Tell that to the Captain.”

“Isn’t that what I’m doing now?” the other voice asked, sounding slightly puzzled.

Silence.

“A-anyway!” came the high-pitched voice of Tsugunaga once again. “We don’t think anything serious was wrong, aside from one of the staff here being slightly electrocuted…”

“…She’s still lying unconscious on the floor…” Natsuyaki interrupted in what sounded a rather tight voice. “I wouldn’t exactly call that ‘slightly’ anything! I wish I at least knew her name to like, reassure her or something. Like what a kind person would do.” Ai exchanged wide-eyed glances with the other members of the crew near her. She was beginning to wonder again about the people working on this ship.

“Aside from that!” Tsugunaga continued hurriedly as if afraid the other Lieutenant Commander would say more, “The ship seems to be fine. We just shut the engines down as a precaution for the time being. Once we get this sorted out, we’ll have us going once again, I promise!” And with that, there was a beep and silence, leaving Ai with her mouth slightly open as she was about to ask just how soon they planned to have the engines running again.

“Should we reopen the channel to down there?” Niigaki asked in a very sardonic voice, staring strongly at Ai. “I mean, you looked like you wanted to say something, Captain…”

“No,” Ai replied weakly, “That’s all right. We’ll… we’ll talk more with them later…”

“Good,” Shimizu said, frowning down at her station. “Because I haven’t quite remembered how to open a communication channel yet. And I have a suspicion it’s not normally my job either… though who’s it would be I’m not sure…”

Ai stayed quiet after her response to her First Mate, looking at the back of Kamei’s head. The girl was staring out into the black space as if there couldn’t be anything more interesting in the world. Even if she talked to those Engineers again, what would she say? Get the engines back online? To what end? After all, did she have any clue where they were going?

“You’re wondering where we’re going, aren’t you?” came a voice that made her swing her head sharply in its direction. Tanaka was looking at her with at least as focused a gaze as Niigaki had. “Now that we’ve gotten through the more pressing issues of remembering things like our names, you’re wondering why we’re here, where we’re going.”

Ai blinked. Had the girl read her mind? She narrowed her eyes. For all she knew, she could have that ability… They were out in the middle of space, after all. At the Lieutenant Commander’s words, Niigaki had looked over at the girl as well, her eyes narrowing slightly.

“Well…” Ai said, trying to find something to say that didn’t make her sound like an idiot after that. “We still don’t know who everyone is. Like Ensign Ichigo over there.”

“Ichigo…” the named girl grumbled, appearing as if she was focused hard on her panel even though Ai believed it was the one used for flight, and since they at the moment weren’t exactly going anywhere, she wasn’t sure what all the girl would have to do there.

“I’m working on it,” Yajima said in a low voice, still focused with fingers working frenziedly on her datapad.

“As to your other questions…” Shimizu added, giving Ai and Tanaka a cautious glance, the latter still staring at Ai, who felt like her soul was bared under the rude girl’s gaze. “I’m checking into that as well. But it’s strange…” She frowned.

“I think I’m accessing the navigational database correctly, but there doesn’t seem to be any information whatsoever about where we are right now. In fact, there’s little information at all in here. I’d say the computer’s memory was wiped clean the same as our own, but everything else seems to be intact, and I see no evidence of deletions. The free digispace is completely fresh, looking as if it’s never held any data at all before.

Ai’s first reaction to the girl’s words was to ask about this “digispace”, but she quickly decided against it. “So we’re a crew without names, on a ship called the Hakudo Maru that seems to have no apparent direction,” she said, looking around at her crew, all who seemed to either be avoiding her, focused on the datapads or panels in front of them, or both.

“If anyone has any ideas, please feel free to share them.” Silence greeted her in response as if the others were ignoring her, although she knew they’d heard every word she spoke. “In that case, I think I’m going to go take a rest. It seems like it’s been quite a long day – even the small part I remember. I suggest some of you do the same as well. We’ll reconvene here in three hours to try to decide what we’re doing?” After a moment, nods came from around the room, and Tanaka at least looked up at her once more.

As she shared the girl’s gaze, she continued in a softer, gentler voice, “And if any of you happen to run into any other passengers on this ship, please make sure they’re in as good a state as can be expected, and perhaps even try to help them discover who they are a little bit, ne?” Tanaka nodded, and Ai unbuttoned the top button of her jacket as she headed for the door that she supposed was the room’s exit.

“Oh,” she said without looking back as she arrived at the doorway, the door sliding open for her. “And if someone would find our wayward bridge officer, please bring her back.”

“Aye aye, Captain,” one of the girls said from behind. She thought it might be Niigaki.

In response, she only nodded and began walking once more, the door sliding shut behind her.
« Last Edit: December 11, 2008, 03:25:02 PM by rokun »

Offline Estrea

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #10 on: December 11, 2008, 01:02:45 PM »
Hehe first comment again!

Dunno what to comment about, but basically is that Reinai I see? XD Except well, Ai's oblivious as usual. >_> XD Risa and Ai don't seem to be as buddy buddy here huh...I can live with that. XD I like how Eri is here, as well as Shimizu and Yajima. ;) They seem to be taking this pretty well lol.

Can't wait to see how the ship exploration goes. Oh and I almost forgot, Momo and Miya as engineers cracks me up for some inexplicable reason. XD "Yes she is short." WINNAR. XD

Awaiting further updates. ^_^

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Offline Fenrir

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #11 on: December 11, 2008, 06:46:02 PM »
Ooh, we get to find out who's who. This makes it so much easier for my brain to process. XD

Spaced out Eri. Perhaps she's communicating with Eriens? XD

Hmm, not a battleship and they have other passengers. It's definitely not a transport ship either. Perhaps an exploration ship? Out to explore the universe and find new planets to colonize?

Can't wait to read more!

Offline JFC

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #12 on: December 11, 2008, 08:16:38 PM »
Quote
And JFC, after your post I realized I've watched waaay too much Star Trek in my life. XD
Impossible. There's no such thing as "too much Star Trek". :cow:
Though I might have thought otherwise had you named this "The Tale of the Kobayashi Maru" LOL

Chapter 1
Quote
Takahashi Ai, they had called her. She supposed she could live with that name – for some reason it felt right, perhaps something left over from the memories that still hadn’t returned.

That was, everyone was happy to let her be the Captain except for a certain long-haired girl who seemed comfortable giving orders.
K. Need to know who the others are and what their ranks/positions are. :)



Quote
The stiffly sitting girl also didn’t stare calmly like all the rest, her head jerking around almost unnaturally the whole time as if everything that was within sight was just amazing.
* JFC scratches his chin as if in the process of thinking.
Hmmmmmmmmm...



Quote
“Well the good news is…” the athletic girl said, fiddling with a computerized notebook in front of her, “I think I’ve almost found a list containing the names of all the command staff of… our… ship. It’s happening slowly, but I’m remembering how to access it all. Still, there’s a password needed for the full crew and civilian files which my mind is completely blank on, so unless I find a textpad with the password scribbled onto it, we may only have our names to go by for a while.”
The password is probably something simple or in plain sight, however with the situation as it is right now, they're obviously not in a position to be able to currently recognize it. Still, at least they have their names so that they aren't all going "hey you" at one another.



Quote
“How many others do you think are on this ship?” short girl asked. Ai would definitely be glad to soon have names for these girls who she had a feeling she should know as well as the palm of her own hand.

“I can’t be sure without the full data…” the other responded, “But for some reason I know it’s a large number. Plus, remember the hyper girl who ran away earlier still hasn’t returned, so there must be a lot of places in here to go.”
LULZ @ "the hyper girl" reference.



Quote
“Point noted,” short girl said with a gracious nod. Ai was definitely getting the impression this was a rather analytical person. “Where I was headed with my logic was that our colleague here seems very knowledgeable on personnel matters – I tried to look up more than I found at first, but had no clue where to start – so it made me wonder if those of us of similar rank have similarly distributed responsibilities, such as one in charge of personnel, as well as one in charge, if I may say so,” she said, pointing to herself, “of more technical matters.”
* JFC can't help but wonder if "short girl's" ears are......rounded....or not. XD



Quote
“And where does that leave me?” long-haired girl asked, seeming to get a little impatient, though doing well at holding her outward calm.

Short girl was silent on that point, but a thought suddenly came to Ai and words left her mouth almost before she realized she’d opened it. “First officer…” she said, staring at the girl whose position she named.
Looks like someone's instincts are kickin' in. :)



Quote
“First officer, huh?” the girl said, tasting the sound of the words as her mood seemed to quickly be improving.

“I think that would make sense on a ship like this…” short girl said, now surveying both the first officer and Ai, who were exchanging glances.

“I guess that means you and I would be close, wouldn’t it?” long-haired girl said, smiling crookedly.
:twisted:



Quote
“It’s funny though that I get the feeling we don’t get along all that well…”

“If we got along perfectly, then there would be no second-guessing of each other’s decisions,” Ai said, once again before hardly thinking. “The best Captain/First Officer relationships are those where disagreements are common, to make sure as correct a decision as possible is always arrived at.”
That's true. It's always better to know what alternate options there are. It's never a good idea for an XO to be a simple "yes man" to the captain.



Quote
*COMMAND CREW MANIFEST*
XO Risa = no surprise here, though it'll be interesting to see what their off-duty relationship is like.  ^-^

Captain Saki & Maimi = cool! :w00t:
* JFC tries to remember the shape of Saki's ears. :P
(With Aichan being Captain of the ship, it's going to be weird having to call Saki by her name instead of "Captain" as I'm accustomed to).

Reina as Tactical Officer = again, not really surprised here. :D

Momo/Miyabi/Airi as Engineers = Miyabi and Airi I can see, but Momo? What, she takes care of all the stuff in the tiny crawlspaces?
:mon sweat:


Quote
“Tactical…” Tanaka responded. “I like that. That means I get to blow things up, right?”
;D


Quote
then there’s Operations Officer… Eri Kamei…”

Everyone turned to look at the stiffly sitting girl with two beads, and apparently under the scrutiny she was distracted from her perusal of the room and looked around at the rest of them. “My name is Eri Kamei?” she asked. The others blinked. How could she have actually been paying attention to what they were saying? “Nice to meet you.” She smiled, and suddenly seemed to become calmer.
:hee:



Quote
“That leaves me out I guess, huh?” the last unnamed girl said, smiling resignedly at the others. “And Miss Escapee too. Hopefully you’ll be able to find that password before too long.”

“Well we’ll have to give you some kind of name for the time being,” Ai said, in an attempt to be comforting. “I can’t keep calling you ‘strong girl’ all the time, especially when trying to command a ship.”

“Strong girl?” the other asked, a half-grin twisting her mouth.

“Don’t tell me you gave us all names like that…” Niigaki said, rolling her eyes. Ai clicked her teeth shut. Was she always this bad with words?
Whoops...probably shouldn't have said that, Aichan. :lol:



Quote
“Ooh,” Tanaka cooed. “What was my name? I bet it was a fun one. Better than Reina. I can’t really find myself saying that much at all…
* JFC hears a rimshot.



Quote
*ENSIGN ICHIGO*
Well, it's cute. Still no idea who it's supposed to be though.
:sweat:



Quote
Then, a crackling sound as of static became audible, and an unfamiliar high-pitched voice broke around them. “Hello? This is… Well, I don’t know who I am, but I’m in engineering. Is anyone out there?”
Hey, the Comm's back up. :rockon:



Quote
“Yes,” Ai said before anyone else could. Niigaki gave her an unreadable look. “We’re all here. At least I think so. This is Captain Ai Takahashi. As for you… If you’re in engineering, I think we could probably let you know, right?” she asked, looking to Yajima who gave a curt nod. “How many beads do you have on your uniform?”

“Um… three…” came the voice.

This time, before Ai could respond Yajima cut in, still studying her datapad from her perch in the chair to the right of Ai’s. “Then you would be either Lieutenant Commander Tsugunaga or Natsuyaki. Hmm, tell me, are you short?”

“Um…” was the only response from the other end, until another, lower pitched voice broke in.

“Yes, she is short,” the new voice said. “Hello, I suppose I would be one of your Lieutenant Commanders as well.”
:on lol:



Quote
“We don’t think anything serious was wrong, aside from one of the staff here being slightly electrocuted…”

“…She’s still lying unconscious on the floor…” Natsuyaki interrupted in what sounded a rather tight voice.
Uh-oh. :o

Time to find Nakky.



Quote
“Aside from that!” Tsugunaga continued hurriedly as if afraid the other Lieutenant Commander would say more, “The ship seems to be fine. We just shut the engines down as a precaution for the time being. Once we get this sorted out, we’ll have us going once again, I promise!”
Well, as long as they're sure that they can indeed get the engines going again, then stopping for now is a good move. One of the first things they tell you about getting lost is to stay put so that it's easier for the rescuers to find you. :yep:



Spaced out Eri. Perhaps she's communicating with Eriens? XD
OMGASS! THE ERIENS!!!
:wahaha:

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Offline Slack

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #13 on: December 11, 2008, 09:01:09 PM »
This seriously reminds me of an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, where the entire crew's memories have been mysteriously wiped.  Even though all their skills are intact, they don't remember who they are, or what their mission is, and have to learn all that through their ship's computer.  The problem is that their mission information has been tampered with...

But yeah, that's what this reminded me of.
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Offline JFC

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #14 on: December 11, 2008, 09:51:34 PM »
^
;D
Ok, I know it's just the prologue, but this SO reminds me of the ST:TNG episode "Conundrum". :lol:
http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/Conundrum_%28episode%29

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Offline Chika-chan

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #15 on: December 11, 2008, 09:54:11 PM »
-Chika has feeling that Ichigo is Yossie-

They did say it didn't seem to fit....

-plots-


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Offline ShikyoxYaiba

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #16 on: December 12, 2008, 02:26:57 AM »
Quote
“Tactical…” Tanaka responded. “I like that. That means I get to blow things up, right?”
XD Nice, Reina...

It's a lot easier to imagine most things now that we know most of the people who are on board. :) Yay for Captain Takahashi and First Officer Niigaki!! =D Although it's gonna take me a while to get used to Ai-chan being the captain...because when I hear "captain", I always think of berryz's Captain. :sweatdrop:

Quote
“Then we also have three Lieutenants,” Yajima went on, seeming fascinated by nothing else than the names and information showing on the device in her hand. “Although one is not actually part of the command staff – Saki Nakajima, listed as ship’s doctor. There’s also another Engineer, Airi Suzuki, and then there’s Operations Officer… Eri Kamei…”

Everyone turned to look at the stiffly sitting girl with two beads, and apparently under the scrutiny she was distracted from her perusal of the room and looked around at the rest of them. “My name is Eri Kamei?” she asked. The others blinked. How could she have actually been paying attention to what they were saying? “Nice to meet you.” She smiled, and suddenly seemed to become calmer.

Operation's officer, huh? Woo! :cow: I love how she totally catches everything they're saying while being kinda spaced out.  Perhaps she's spotted the Eriens!? *jk*

*goes to reread prologue to get a better visualization of the setting since she now knows who is who...save for maybe 2-3 people?*

Offline Amarghetta

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #17 on: December 12, 2008, 02:46:05 AM »
You mixed them all! No wonder I was confused when reading... ¬¬
Strangely enough, I got some of them right. :P


Quote
“Tactical…” Tanaka responded. “I like that. That means I get to blow things up, right?”
Lol! Good ol' Reina.

Quote
“A-anyway!” came the high-pitched voice of Tsugunaga once again. “We don’t think anything serious was wrong, aside from one of the staff here being slightly electrocuted…
I'd been holding my laughter, but this just cracked me up for some reason. Must be my inner sadist. XD

Other than that, awesome update. Now the story's taking shape, so to speak.  :muffin:

Offline ringo-hime

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #18 on: December 19, 2008, 07:37:22 AM »
oh boy this is getting osamer.. :D
cnt wait..ahihihi,  :P

Offline rokun

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Re: 白童丸物語 - The Tale of the Hakudo Maru [Chapter 1]
« Reply #19 on: December 20, 2008, 04:51:43 PM »
Semester is over and so I now have time to respond to comments. :) This story is still new, so there may not be a whole lot to say... but I want to at least thank everyone who's supported it so far!

Estrea: Somehow I think your eyes do not deceive you. ;) However, you know me, so things will not be as smooth as they seem like they might be... This next chapter will throw the first wrench into things. ;) The Buono! engineering crew is rather odd, isn't it? :lol: That's... kind of their point though, haha. You should see quite a bit more of them next chapter!

Fenrir: When the crew finds out what the ship they're in is, you likely will too. :) And what is Eri doing...? :?

JFC: I thought about the Kobayashi Maru while beginning to put this together. :lol: You also seem to have some good (if perhaps unsaid) thoughts about what's going on here too, since you seem to be a bit of a Star Trek fan. XD Although... I've definitely taken some influence from Star Trek, but from other places as well... When the main story comes out, it might be harder to guess. That said, it may take a little while for that to happen. XD I'm taking a bit of a cue from Essy-chan here and keeping chapters a bit shorter, though that also means it'll take longer for certain things to develop.  ;)

Slack: Good Star Trek memory on your part too. :D

Chika: Hmm, I'm gonna have to think on that for a bit. ;) But things will hopefully become clear eventually... both technical things such as names as well as just "wtf is going on" XD

SxY: Hmm, JFC mentioned this too. I suppose I got so used to calling Saki by her actual name in my other story... but others I suppose haven't. XD Glad to see you so into the story you even went back to read the prologue. ^_^

Amarghetta: Of course I mixed them. :P It's what I do... just wait until you see what other things become mixed... Glad to see you called some of them right too though. :) I didn't give much information at all, but apparently a lot of what there was is rather appropriate... like in Circle there's somewhat of a logic to how everything's set up...

ringo-hime: Thanks for popping in. ^_^ Keep reading!

Now... on to the short (but hopefully somewhat imagination-provoking) chapter 2!

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