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Author Topic: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 13 is up!  (Read 27812 times)

Offline rndmnwierd

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 9 is up
« Reply #60 on: January 08, 2010, 12:36:56 AM »
Maki's cheating with Rika?!

Ai loves Reina?!?!

Sayu loves Eri?!?!?!? Oh, wait, I knew the last part. :lol:

Offline amEthystx

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 9 is up
« Reply #61 on: January 08, 2010, 04:09:09 AM »
Ohhh~ I realize i missed out a chapter XD


Even Ai-chan is horrible, terrible, vegetable(?)... but that is cause Maki is cheating on the girl she love.. She did lay low the first time..she had even given Maki chance to patch things up.. but was caught the 2nd time.. But she didn't go to Reina straight and gave Maki the choice to confess to avoid Reina heart being broke the same way that Eri broke hers.. Ai-chan gave her nothing but CHOICES~ We're see how Maki makes her way through~ XD

Even though Ai-chan is scary in a way..but you can't say she is wrong..

As for Sayu and Eri................... *shakes head*




Oh~ Here's the update version... And as we all can see! At the top of the food chain...we have... *drumroll* REINA! Lol.. everyone wants a piece of her... XD

 :mon bat:


Offline kRisZ

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 9 is up
« Reply #62 on: January 08, 2010, 05:23:03 PM »
Quote
“You’re going to leave who? Rika?” Ai asked.

Oh, so it's Rika


Quote
“And who she’s going to believe?” Ai asked weakly. “The friend which loves her and takes care of her? Or to the ex-girlfriend which cheated on her?”

If I were Reina I will trash both  :D


Quote
“Yes… I didn’t have to do that… But I couldn’t avoid it.” The younger said softly. “I was way too hurt…”

Too hurt and jealous




@ the pic

Why was Aika always in there?



Offline amEthystx

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 9 is up
« Reply #63 on: January 09, 2010, 03:42:11 AM »
Quote
@ the pic

Why was Aika always in there?

LOL~ Trey-trey mentioned her in the story once... soo... Maybe she can be somewhere....but i dunno where... so she goes to the bottom with "???" XD

 :mon bat:

Offline cogi_yoshi

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 9 is up
« Reply #64 on: January 09, 2010, 06:17:26 PM »
Maki cheating Reina over Rika....
Ai blackmailing Maki because she loves Reina
Eri lost Reina over Maki because of Sayu
and also a possible Gakikame because Ai doesn't love Risa back...

yeah...the title really fits the story... They made a lot of lies.. :glasses:

Offline lil_hamz

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 9 is up
« Reply #65 on: January 09, 2010, 06:45:05 PM »
Woah things are definitely getting complicated. Somehow I felt for Risa when Sayu said if she was in a similiar position how would she have handled it :( As of now the most pitiful character is still Eri for me. Hopefully Sayu can make it up to the turtle somehow. Is there gonna be any TakaGaki at all? *hopeful*

Offline kRisZ

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 9 is up
« Reply #66 on: January 10, 2010, 02:32:49 AM »
LOL~ Trey-trey mentioned her in the story once... soo... Maybe she can be somewhere....but i dunno where... so she goes to the bottom with "???" XD

Ah, ok  XD

Offline Treykun

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 9 is up
« Reply #67 on: January 11, 2010, 07:38:43 PM »

@badsaints: Yep, Charmy!! Someone new enters in the game... :twisted:

Quote
Quote
“How would you feel if the person who you love, loves someone much more than she loves you?”
Quote
“Oh, shit…”
Yep I think she answered her own question :lol:
XD Lol, yeah :P

@rndm: :lol: Yeah, you got it XD

@bishop:

Quote
Even Ai-chan is horrible, terrible, vegetable(?)...
Lol XD

Quote
Even though Ai-chan is scary in a way..but you can't say she is wrong..
Exacto, but she isn't that scary XD She's just evil... :twisted:

@The pic... Lol! XD It's pretty clear :P

Quote
At the top of the food chain...we have... *drumroll* REINA!
:lol: Sure, if I'm the author the top has to be Reina or Eri XD

@kRisZ:

Quote
If I were Reina I will trash both  :D
BOOM!! That was a resounding sucess~~~ :rofl:

@cogi_yoshi:

Quote
yeah...the title really fits the story... They made a lot of lies.. :glasses:
Phew... Thanks... I passed a hard time searching for a title XD

@Hammy:
Quote
As of now the most pitiful character is still Eri for me.
Same here~ But I don't know if it's just because I adore her too much :lol:

Quote
Is there gonna be any TakaGaki at all? *hopeful*
XD We'll see that~

Offline Treykun

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 9 is up
« Reply #68 on: January 11, 2010, 07:45:12 PM »
God, I hate the end of the holidays... :depressed:

But today was snowing, and I didn't have to go to classes nor work XD So I've finished this chapter...

CHAPTER 10

“What?! She was going to confess her that day?!” Sayumi asked stunned.

“Yes…”

“Oh my god… She must hate me more than I thought…” The younger said looking at the floor.

“Well, she has her reasons…” Risa said, defending Eri.

“Yeah, I know it…” Sayumi admitted. “But now I guess Reina deserves an apologize too…”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean if I didn’t interfere between that day… Probably, they’d be together now…”

“Yeah… But you can’t change the past.” Risa stated. “So you can’t really do anything about it…”

“True…” Sayumi agreed. “But I can’t help but feel guilty.”

“That’s because you’re guilty…” The older said sceptically.

“That’s true and I’m not going to argue about that…” Sayumi said, laughing lightly.

“Yeah…”

“But still, I’ll apologize to Reina too…” The younger whispered. “After all, this isn’t her fault, and she paid a huge part of the consequences…”

“I’m glad to see that you’re going to do the right thing…” Risa said smiling sweetly to Sayumi.

“Eh?”

“I mean you can see that you’ve done something bad, and you regret it…” She stated as Sayumi looked at her. “Seems like you’ve put apart that narcissistic point of yours…” She concluded laughing.

“Well, thanks. I’ll take it as a compliment…” Sayumi chuckled.

***

“And who she’s going to believe?” Ai asked weakly. “The friend which loves her and takes care of her? Or to the ex-girlfriend which cheated on her?”

Maki turned around and looked through the window. She wanted to punch Ai so badly, that she started to think how much time she will stand her… Maki just wanted to get rid of her, and spend some time alone to have time to think.

“Hello…” The irritating girl said, trying to wake Maki from her space dreaming.

“Ai-chan… You know that this plan of yours is going to fail…” The older said softly, without even look at the other girl.

“No, it won’t.”

They kept silent for a while, and Ai got up from the couch, in order to stay right next to Maki. As they stared at the empty street through the window, Maki’s mobile rang. The older wasted no time in catch it, but when she saw who was calling her, she throw the object on the couch.

“I guess it’d be stupid to ask who is…” Ai said sarcastically, as she sat leaned down in a wall. “You’re not going to answer?”

“What do you think?” The other replied as she led her way to her bedroom.

“Hey, where are you going…?”

“To dress myself up, I’m still in a towel.” And she closed her door behind her, while Ai looked around her.

The apartment seemed pretty normal, but there was one thing that caught her attention. She approached a photo that was resting on the table.

“Cute, indeed.” She thought aloud as she had a better view of the picture. “Maybe it’s from better days…”

Maki was embracing Reina from behind, and both had these great smiles put on. But judging her haircuts, Ai started to think about something else.

“What are you looking at…?” Maki asked, now fully dressed and with a towel over her shoulders. “Ah… I love that photo, you know…”

“When did you take it?” Maki started to think about it.

“About… Erm… Ten months ago…” She stuttered. “Or at least I think so…”

Ai looked at Maki intensely, the other wasn’t even aware of that fact, she seemed to be distracted, to be thinking about something else.

“Ten months ago?” The younger asked with a devious smirk. “Weren’t you at that time passing a lot of time with the other…?”

“Don’t bring that topic up again, please.” Maki replied, trying to avoid another argument now that the things had cooled down a little. “I don’t want to talk about it, and you know that.”

“What a pity…” Ai retorted teasingly. “You’ll have to talk with Reina about it very soon…”

Now it was the turn to Maki to look at Ai-chan intensely, the rage was reflected in both Ai and Maki’s eyes. She approached the younger, probably to send her out of the apartment, but just as she made an attempt to take Ai by the arm, someone interrupted her.

“Hi, Maki you know that…” The short girl realised that her girlfriend wasn’t alone. “Ai-chan? What are you doing here…?”

“Well…” Ai’s cold gaze turned into a warm one as soon as she saw Reina, the same happened to her voice. “I was here, paying a visit to Maki.”

“For what?” Reina asked, and Maki, fearful, turned her attention to Ai.

“For…” The leader wanted to say the truth, but surprisingly she just couldn’t do it. “Erm… Well, I needed help with a dance move so I asked to my sempai.” She lied with a smile.

“I see…” Reina replied softly, looking at her girlfriend. “Maki? You ok? You’re pale…”

“I’m fine… Really…” The older assured her, while she put a hand on her forehead to check if she had fever.

Ai looked at Reina’s kind gesture briefly, and the jealousy started to fill her body even more when she saw the short girl giving her girlfriend a quick kiss on the cheek. Since she couldn’t take it anymore, Ai quickly led to the apartment’s door.

“Well, gotta go girls. Bye…” And she closed the door, leaving Reina dumbfounded. She looked over Maki to find an explanation, but the older just shrugged.

And suddenly they heard a loud noise outside.

“What was that?!” Reina asked.

“Don’t know, probably, someone have dropped something…” Maki lied knowing that the noise came from Ai’s own rage.
« Last Edit: January 21, 2010, 07:59:10 PM by Treykun »

Offline rndmnwierd

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 10 Updated!
« Reply #69 on: January 12, 2010, 03:01:33 AM »
Angry!Ai is quite awesome. Maki had better tell Reina soon or else risk losing her because of Ai. At least is the news comes from her own mouth, there's a chance they could work it out.

Or maybe Reina will use Sayu to get some revenge? :twisted:

Offline badsaints

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 10 Updated!
« Reply #70 on: January 12, 2010, 04:42:22 AM »
The ending is priceless! :lol:

Offline kRisZ

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 10 Updated!
« Reply #71 on: January 12, 2010, 04:03:43 PM »
Quote
“Don’t know, probably, someone have dropped something…” Maki lied knowing that the noise came from Ai’s own rage.

Ooh. Badass Ai  :twothumbs

Offline lil_hamz

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 10 Updated!
« Reply #72 on: January 12, 2010, 08:55:42 PM »
Oooh is Reina gonna discover Ai there? *dun duh duh* I liked the SayuGaki talk cum bonding session. These 2 have the potential to be so cute together. I know it won't happen in here but I like to dream :P and yes! Kame is such a poor soul. She needs some love, and soon! :cry:

Offline LovelyGaki

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 10 Updated!
« Reply #73 on: January 17, 2010, 12:01:05 PM »
Nice fanfic  :twothumbs

Quote
And suddenly they heard a loud noise outside.

“What was that?!” Reina asked.

“Don’t know, probably, someone have dropped something…” Maki lied knowing that the noise came from Ai’s own rage.

 :lol:

Looking forward to an update  :grin:

“Never regret anything coz at one time it was exactly what u wanted……;))”
-Ayumi Hamasaki
The WrecKreated Co.

Offline Treykun

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 10 Updated!
« Reply #74 on: January 18, 2010, 08:22:06 PM »

@rndm:

Quote
Or maybe Reina will use Sayu to get some revenge? :twisted:

Ohhhhhh... Badsaints and Hammy will be happy if that occurs... XD

@badsaints: XD Yeah, it is... Ai's the badass queen :P

@kRisZ: :lol: Everyone loves the angry Ai XD

@Hammy:

Quote
I liked the SayuGaki talk cum bonding session. These 2 have the potential to be so cute together.

And then... What about Kame you evil person?? XD But well, here all the pairings are welcome... :lol:

@LovelyGaki: Thanks :P As I said... Everyone loves this side of Ai XD

Offline Treykun

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 10 Updated!
« Reply #75 on: January 18, 2010, 08:35:36 PM »

Well, to type with just one hand is a pain... I'm too slow, and I wonder what's wrong with me since this is the sixth time that I've broken my wrist... I guess I should get used to this...

:fainted: I have no remedy...

CHAPTER 11

“Morning, Eri!”

“Hi, Gaki?” Eri replied with a weak smile, it was obvious that she was still concerned. “Whatcha doing?”

“Nothing, really…”

“Don’t lie…” Eri said gazing at Risa.

“Ok, I was looking for Ai-chan…”

“Have you thought about her?” The slightly younger asked.

“Yeah, I’ve spent all the night awake thinking…” Risa replied, as she stretched.

“Well, we’re two in that case…” Eri stated laughing and Risa smiled at her.

“So, you’ve been thinking too…?”

“Yeah…”

“Just about Reina?” Risa asked, earning a slightly cold gaze from Eri.

“No.” She stated simply as she sat on the floor, and started to stretch too.

“Eri…” The older whispered putting a supporting hand on Eri’s shoulder. “Sayumi regrets what she did…”

“What are you talking about?” The younger asked in an irritated tone, looking deeply at her friend.

“Eri, she wants you to forgive her…”

“And how do you know that?” Eri cut her off.

“Because she has told me…” Risa replied, in a low tone.

“You’ve talked with her?! After what I told to you?!” Eri asked scandalized.

“Yes…”

“I can’t believe it!” She got up from the floor, and didn’t look at Risa, who was a little dumbfounded because of her friend’s reaction.

“Eri… please… don’t be like that…”

“Don’t be like that?!” Eri yelled. “Well, if you want me to not be like that, please, explain what the hell were you doing with Sayumi!”

“We just talked about what happened between Reina and you…” Risa explained as she got up too, and approached Eri. “She wanted me to hear her point of view of the story…”

“What point of view?” Eri asked as she started to look at Risa again. “There’s no other point of view. She just told lies to Reina, and that’s it. End of the story…”

“Yes, but she wanted to say to me that she’s sorry…” Risa stated, in a calm voice to try to appease Eri.

“I don’t know why… But I can’t believe that…”

“She’s truly sorry, Eri…”

“Impossible. Sayumi loves herself too much, and always thinks that she’s right.” Eri exposed smirking. “She’s too narcissist to see her own mistakes…”

“Well, that’s what I thought. But this time she wants to do the right thing, and…”

Risa couldn’t finish her sentence since someone entered abruptly in the room.

“Kamei-san, Niigaki-san, the rehearsal is cancelled!”

“Oh, hi Aika-chan.” Risa greeted her kouhai. “But why?”

“Lack of members…”

“Lack?” Eri asked stunned. “No one never fails to come to the rehearsals…”

“Yeah, but Takahashi-san nor Tanaka-san have come today so…” Aika explained.

“Reina hasn’t come?” Eri asked surprised.

“And Ai-chan neither? How strange…”

***

While then, Ai was laid on her bed looking at her slightly purple fist.

“I guess I didn’t have to punch the wall…” She mumbled to herself, with an affected smirk. “What can I do…?”

Suddenly, something glow passed across Ai’s eyes, and she got up from her bed abruptly. She approached her closet and took a little box, which rested under a pile of clothes.

Ai sat on her bed again and crossed her legs, as she started to search for something inside of it.

“Damn! Where is it…?!” She asked to herself as she threw the content of the box on the bed. “If I find it… This will be resolved…”

And then, Ai’s gaze stayed locked into a certain photo which had fallen from the bed to the ground.

“There it is…!”

***

“Feeling better…?” Maki asked as she entered in her room, with a glass of water, a thermometer, and an aspirin.

“No…” Reina responded weakly from under the bed’s sheets.

“Hey, take this…” The older said, sitting right next to Reina.

“What’s that…?”

“An aspirin, it will make your fever go down.” She stated smiling and observing Reina as the younger took the medicine and gulped down the water. “Ok… Now sleep some more…” And Maki made an attempt to go, but Reina took her by the hand.

“Where are you going…?”

“To the kitchen…” The older replied slightly surprised because of Reina’s weird reaction.

“Can you… stay here?”  She asked and Maki laughed.

“I’m going to be a few steps away, if you need something you can call me.” She replied amused.

“Yeah, but I want you to stay here…”

“Oh…” Maki was about to agree, but suddenly her mobile rang.

It’s Rika… She thought, and looked over to Reina, who was still waiting for an answer.

“If you have to go…” She said weakly, as settling back on the bed. “It’s ok…”

“Erm…” Maki stuttered looking at the mobile.

“It’s from the job…?” The younger asked, trying to find a response from Maki.

“…” Suddenly, the guilt appeared on Maki’s body, remembering her that she didn’t want to loose Reina. “Nevermind, I’ll stay here.”

“Really?” Now was Reina’s turn to be surprised. “You sure…?”

“Yeah.” Maki cut her off, as she plopped down into the bed. “I’ll stay here… With you…”


Offline rndmnwierd

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 11 is up...
« Reply #76 on: January 19, 2010, 02:29:02 AM »
Quote
remembering her that she didn’t want to loose Reina.
How did she forget!?
Quote
“I’ll stay here… With you…”
You better! Damn!
Quote
*Eri/Gaki Convo*
Eri is still so angry, but can I hope for some Gakishige?

Feel better!

Offline badsaints

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 10 Updated!
« Reply #77 on: January 19, 2010, 01:25:21 PM »
@rndm:
Quote
Or maybe Reina will use Sayu to get some revenge? :twisted:
Ohhhhhh... Badsaints and Hammy will be happy if that occurs... XD
I know for one, I won't be complaining XD

Gah I really hate Maki in this story :angry: How could she date another girl when she has a cute girlfriend like Reina :angry: I say Reina should just dump Maki and go for TanaKame coupling. Not Ai, cause ebil Ai should get together with ebil Sayu so that they can plan more ebil actions to other girls :D Hmm Risa can continue being emo alone XD


Oh btw, what happened to your hand? :O Feeling better now? Get well quickly since it's less than a month to V-day! :D
« Last Edit: January 19, 2010, 01:28:36 PM by badsaints »

Offline kRisZ

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 11 is up...
« Reply #78 on: January 19, 2010, 02:28:27 PM »
Quote
Well, to type with just one hand is a pain... I'm too slow, and I wonder what's wrong with me since this is the sixth time that I've broken my wrist... I guess I should get used to this...
That's ouches Trey-trey  :shocked
Basketball? or you did what Ai did?  :P


Quote
“Reina hasn’t come?” Eri asked surprised.

“And Ai-chan neither? How strange…”

 :yep:


Quote
“I guess I didn’t have to punch the wall…”
You figured?  :D


Quote
“There it is…!”
Some kind of hard evidence?


Maki and Reina's relationship is hmmm


Offline amEthystx

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Re: A Surplus of Lies, Chapter 11 is up...
« Reply #79 on: January 19, 2010, 03:54:07 PM »
What happened to your wrist? o.O I fell the other day at work and got a nasty scar on my leg *crys*

I realize i forgot to comment for chapter 10 XD


Evil Ai-chan  :wub:

Reina  :wub:

*throws metal wok and ladle at Maki*  :P

ps:
Quote
“Ten moths ago?” The younger asked with a devious smirk.
- I remembered giggling the first time i read this and did it again just now  XD


Chapter 11

Ai-chan's fist :(

Quote
or you did what Ai did? :P
- Did you? I wanted to ask that too~

I know it shouldn't be like this but........... GO! Ai-chan go! What have you found?! :D A matchbox from the hotel that Maki and Rika might have came out of? (So japanese manga storyline..lol)


Maki - Even though she stayed.................... but.........

*Throw Durian shell (do you know what this is? XD) at Maki*

 :mon bat:


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