An Old Story :) Up5 5/10

[kRisZ]

BP’s been asking me for a fanfic... I tried to fix my one shot but hmmm... my brain is like suffering drought. And I remembered this one, my first ever written fanfic. I wrote this story in two days time three years ago, 22 pages. No wonder it’s crappy  so I will try to re-write it but bit by bit  work is very exhausting atm. And I’m not so sure if I will follow the story in its entirety, so...  ummm Enjoy



Up1



I was happily chitchatting, giggling and laughing before I was stunned when I saw someone’s eyes by the classroom door staring at mine. Her face looked so familiar but my split second aim to pinpoint from where exactly was a huge failure. Frown on my face appeared as I was struggling, trying to think and scan my not so good memory, hoping I could fish out an answer. After a few seconds, my astonishment increased and my body felt like it was frozen in time. ‘Is it her?’ Before I was able to collect myself and make any reaction, she was gone already as fast as she appeared ten seconds ago. And all that's left was the beating of my heart, as if two beats were trying to outrun the other. Mouth agape, eyes wide opened.


After gathering all my senses back together and without saying a word I stood up, rushed to the door and found myself looking into a jam-packed hallway.


 “Damn of all time, why on class break.” I mumbled as I was trying to pass through a crowd, where some were laughing, some were just talking, and there were a few who were shouting, for reasons that I have no idea what and don’t have time to think about and don’t care whatever it was. My mind was trying to focus solely on one person at the moment, and that’s the girl I saw some seconds ago in yellow collared shirt. I walked as fast as I could but the students along the corridor made it harder for me to catch up with her. And in an instant she’s already nowhere in sight. She was already gone.


I stood agape, unable to comprehend the thing that had happened in such haste. My time in this world seemed like it’s been put on pause mode. I was standing in the midst of the crowd but I heard nothing. I was staring but saw nothing.


“Ouch!” was the first word that came out from my mouth after that. Someone gave me a hard smack on my back. I turned around and found a girl with a wide smirk on her face.


“Risa, what are you doing here? You looked like a baby who just lost a candy” said the girl still wearing that grin.


“Eh?... oh I was trying to do that ‘disappearing act’ thing from the book we read the other day, but now I’m certain… it’s just a fiction, you saw me, so the experimentation ends here” I know it was a very lame alibi but I found no other alibi but that.


“Silly” she responded while giving me another smack.


“Ouch! That’s two smacks for today Aika” I said while putting my right arm around her neck and dragged her. “Let us go back to the classroom before the professor gets there first”


The small but very energetic girl found a weak spot from my grip and ran. I followed her and noticed the hallway was not as crowded as earlier. It gave me a strange emotion, a heart ache to be exact, as I recalled the incident a few minutes ago.


“Reina help me!” Aika shouted as I made my entry into the classroom. Her cry stunned me, as if I was awakened from a very deep slumber. My troubled face was somehow caught by Reina’s anxious eyes. She looked at me with a slight frown, as if asking for an explanation.


“Oh shit” I mumbled. The incident earlier was too quick that I forgot I was with Reina “Now I have some explaining to do” I mumbled again.


“Aika started it” I said, trying to divert her attention from my previous out of the ordinary action and stick with Aika’s play. But it looked like my leaving her without a word from our little chat earlier was never forgotten, because she looked at me again as if asking a question but the slight frown wasn’t there anymore, thus concluding that my attempt failed. Submitting, I sat down and whispered “I’ll explain later.” and she nodded.


After an hour, the bell chimed and almost everyone got up and left the room, including Aika who gave me a wave with a grin and I waved back which somehow disappointed the girl, for reasons that I have no time to think about at the moment.


“Risa” Reina’s voice carried a worried tone.
 

“Ye-yes?” I answered, a bit surprised.


“What’s wrong?” she asked.


“Hmm.?.”


“You’ve been not listening since the class started... what’s bugging you?”


“Oh, that...” I said while taking a deep breath. “I think I saw her in there” I added pointing at the door


“Who?”


“Aichan”

[pretend_2besome1]

K!!

Sorry, can't comment now but I'll be back later 

Edit:
Back!

This was written 3 years ago? And two days time for 22 pages is fast! (to me).
It feels like watching a movie when I read the first part of the story when Risa was searching for Ai-chan.

“Eh?... oh I was trying to do that ‘disappearing act’ thing from the book we read the other day, but now I’m certain… it’s just a fiction, you saw me, so the experimentation ends here”

LOL Risa

Already so many mysteries in chap 1, keep going! 

[rndmnwierd]

Aichan!

You know, I don't know why, but Risa and Reina calling each other by their first names so comfortably makes me happy. I like stories where they're close, i guess. Can't wait for more.

[alwaysYou]

wondering what's aichan relationship with them..
gakisan and reina kno who she is yet gakisan dont really seem to remember her too..WHY?!

*my sleepy mode couldnt be offf*

[kRisZ]

C
  

This was written 3 years ago? And two days time for 22 pages is fast! (to me).

Yep  Yeah it was kinda fast even to me  that's why it's crappylicious 

It feels like watching a movie when I read the first part of the story when Risa was searching for Ai-chan.

Oh please... rude comments are very much welcome 

Already so many mysteries in chap 1, keep going! 

this story is kinda short actually... it's like whoosh whoosh whoosh 


rnd-sama
 

You know, I don't know why, but Risa and Reina calling each other by their first names so comfortably makes me happy.

Yay!

I like stories where they're close, i guess.

Wait for Up3 or 4  lol

Can't wait for more.

Here's more 



AABatt <-- I miss calling you that 
  

wondering what's aichan relationship with them..

Oh... you do wonder.?.       

gakisan and reina kno who she is yet gakisan dont really seem to remember her too..WHY?!

Why.?. no idea  I so  teasing you S!hu! 

*my sleepy mode couldnt be offf*

You want me to sing you a lullaby.?.  





Up2



“Risa, I’m going home now” Ai, who was sitting beside me, said while shaking my arm lightly. We were sitting in a small broken circular shape on the grassy ground. It was a Tuesday afternoon, all classes were through. We were just there hanging out like always, playing and talking things from here to there after tending with the roses from a few yards away. It’s their groups’ daily schedule to be there and I was just tagging along at first but before I knew it, it became part of my daily routine. They're all fifth grader and I was the only one sixth grader.


“Yes, I know... then go” I answered without looking at her.


“Got my goodbye kisses from them already” the girl spoke again but I pretended I didn’t hear her last sentence and continued with what I was doing and that’s watching this one cute and beautiful girl a few steps away, who happens to be one of her best friends.


Moments later, Ai finally gave up. She gathered her things and stood up “Goodbye everyone, see you tomorrow”


I didn’t turn around to wave nor pay attention to her at all. My attention was almost all consumed by the girl who was still trying to make the soil fertile by tilling them.


I was in my own little world as I gazed at her, from her mesmerizing eyes to her beautiful nose to her very kissable lips and then I suddenly remembered... “Ai wanted a kiss from me?!” was my thought. “Eww, gross” I mumbled as I recalled the goodbye kisses she had with her best friends. I saw saliva tangled like a web as they broke from the kisses. Although it was all a girl’s lip touching another girl’s lip and no biting involved but still I find it gross in some way. But why do I crave for a kiss from the girl who’s still tending the roses?


Letting out a sigh, I stood up to get my water bottle from my knapsack hoping it could ease the inexplicable heat building inside me. I was trying to locate where my knapsack was and saw the vanishing Ai from across the street with her shoulders low “Oh great, did I just make her sad?” I mumbled.


“Huh?” asked Linlin who’s now showering the roses with water.


“Eh, nothing... I was just talking to myself” I replied with a smile “I’ll be back in a sec, okay?” I told her and looked across the street again and left.


“Maybe I can catch up with her if I go this way” and so I made a quick turn. I waited for about a minute or so and she emerged from the corner dragging her feet, still with her head low, and playing with her earphone’s wire. I smiled as I watch her and was about to walk towards her direction when a revving motorcycle was approaching.


I froze on my track. My heartbeat stopped for a moment and started to race after a few seconds. I could hear it, even louder than the engine’s sound.


“AICHAN!!!”





PS When I said I'm re-writing it because it's so crappy, please don't expect it to be not crappy after the revision   


PS#2 lol I found errors and made edits 

[alwaysYou]

AABatt  <-- I miss calling you that

i miss being called this too..

Why.?. no idea  I so  teasing you S!hu! 

EBIL

“Got my goodbye kisses from them already” the girl spoke again but I pretended I didn’t hear her last sentence and continued with what I was doing and that’s watching this one cute and beautiful girl a few steps away, who happens to be one of her best friends.


Moments later, Ai finally gave up. She gathered her things and stood up “Goodbye everyone, see you tomorrow”

damn you gakisan!!!DAMN YOU
who will reject aichan!!!you this idiot 

I was in my own little world as I gazed at her, from her mesmerizing eyes to her beautiful nose to her very kissable lips and then I suddenly remembered...

i declare that i hate gakisan in this fic..

I froze on my track. My heartbeat stopped for a moment and started to race after a few seconds. I could hear it, even louder than the engine’s sound.


“AICHAN!!!”

AHHHHH
aichan involve in accident..and she suddenly disappear thus like what i ask for the UP1 chp..gakisan didnt remember her when sshe saw her at first..if so i wonder how long aichan is gone..=x
but should make aichan forget gakisan..that the best..she doesnt want to kiss aichan..serve her right *humpt*

after reading

You know, I don't know why, but Risa and Reina calling each other by their first names so comfortably makes me happy.

Yay!

I like stories where they're close, i guess.

Wait for Up3 or 4  lol

hmmmm..the girl gakisan looking at is reina?
geeee..


quick!!!next chp!!!

[pretend_2besome1]

It feels like watching a movie when I read the first part of the story when Risa was searching for Ai-chan.

Oh please... rude comments are very much welcome 

LOL really? But it really felt like that when I read it before.

this story is kinda short actually... it's like whoosh whoosh whoosh 

Ai-chan wanted a kiss and Risa was busy staring another girl? Seriously Gaki-san what are you doing?!
The girl is Reina?

I saw saliva tangled like a web as they broke from the kisses.

Okay, I agree, this is gross LOL

“AICHAN!!!”

don't tell me....

[rndmnwierd]

Ai-chan!!!

Nooo, not the motorcycles!

Wait for Up3 or 4    lol

Wha-What? *imagines* 

[lil_hamz]

Oooh a bike eh? Who's gonna get hit? Make it Gaki. So I won't be the only author branded with torturing the bean anymore

I like this fic. TakaGaki yes! TanaGaki (?) yes too If you throw in GakiShige and KameMame too it'll be YES YES YES YES YES. Alright, I'll stop being lame now

[badsaints]

Oh a new old story from you Yay~

Interesting story so far I'm getting the mystery/ghost story vibe in the first chapter. Like...Ai has been gone for a reason and Risa is still hung up on Ai, which is why she "saw" Ai.

Chapter 2 is a trip down the memory lane? A motorbike huh? Gasp! Was that our dear Bishop Ni on the Ducati? One thing I don't understand though...why did Risa think it's gross to kiss Ai? I mean, it's Ai!

Just don't kill Ai this time, please? Oh wait, maybe you have, ya ebil author (but that's why we love you so much)

[amEthystx]

Ai-CHANnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

 

I read the first chapter on duty.. so... I'm sorry~

I thought Gaki-san was together with Reina in the first chapter... So... HOW DID it changed to Lin2 with the cutting rose thingy?! 

when a revving motorcycle was approaching.

- WAIT~! That motor sounds familiar! Ain't that my Ducati!? LOL! <- can't help it..

[kRisZ]

AABatt

i miss being called this too..

That's good to know 

EBIL

damn you gakisan!!!DAMN YOU
who will reject aichan!!!you this idiot 

Relax, that ain't good for the heart 

i declare that i hate gakisan in this fic..

Jeezzz

AHHHHH
aichan involve in accident..and she suddenly disappear thus like what i ask for the UP1 chp..gakisan didnt remember her when sshe saw her at first..if so i wonder how long aichan is gone..=x
but should make aichan forget gakisan..that the best..she doesnt want to kiss aichan..serve her right *humpt*

That is your story not mine       

hmmmm..the girl gakisan looking at is reina?
geeee..

C

LOL really? But it really felt like that when I read it before.

Ummm     

Ai-chan wanted a kiss and Risa was busy staring another girl? Seriously Gaki-san what are you doing?!
The girl is Reina?

Okay, I agree, this is gross LOL

lol

don't tell me....

Don't tell you what? 



rnd-sama

Ai-chan!!!

Nooo, not the motorcycles!

Wha-What? *imagines* 

I'm not sure what you're imagining so ummm continue imagining 



lil_hamz

Oooh a bike eh? Who's gonna get hit? Make it Gaki. So I won't be the only author branded with torturing the bean anymore

but that's your title. If I'd be given the privilege, like you guys, I'd like to be remembered as the Weird or Twisted or Senseless Writer     but that's kinda hard to accomplish  Ganbarema-choi 

I like this fic. TakaGaki yes! TanaGaki (?) yes too If you throw in GakiShige and KameMame too it'll be YES YES YES YES YES. Alright, I'll stop being lame now

Hmmm 



baddie

Oh a new old story from you Yay~

Yay

Interesting story so far I'm getting the mystery/ghost story vibe in the first chapter. Like...Ai has been gone for a reason and Risa is still hung up on Ai, which is why she "saw" Ai.

I'm not sure 

Chapter 2 is a trip down the memory lane? A motorbike huh? Gasp! Was that our dear Bishop Ni on the Ducati?

Yep  About the rider, how about the grumpy old lady with a walking stick      
    

One thing I don't understand though...why did Risa think it's gross to kiss Ai? I mean, it's Ai!

Nee... I wonder too 

Just don't kill Ai this time, please? Oh wait, maybe you have, ya ebil author (but that's why we love you so much)

    



Bishop NI

Ai-CHANnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

 

s with Bishop NI 

I read the first chapter on duty.. so... I'm sorry~

lol, it's cool 

I thought Gaki-san was together with Reina in the first chapter... So... HOW DID it changed to Lin2 with the cutting rose thingy?! 

      Okay, Linlin's a flashback 

- WAIT~! That motor sounds familiar! Ain't that my Ducati!? LOL! <- can't help it..

Nope, sorry. Yours was a pre-historic one  but then again that update was a flashback    you're making me think 
 




UP3



My tears were threatening to fall. My heart was loudly pounding. My body was erratically trembling. And my hands were clenched into tight fists. The revving motorcycle abruptly stopped just a few feet away from Ai. And then after coming into a full stop, she started to laugh crazily. I was so shaken and so angry that I swear I’d lunge forward if I didn’t see Ai grinning after recovering from a split second shock.


“Cousin, that’s a very bad joke don’t you think?!” shouted the blushing Ai as she bombarded the driver with flying palms.


“Okay… okay… I’m sorry” she said in between laughs “Your mother asked me to pick you up. Come on, hope on” she continued, grinning.


The grin was so annoying in my eyes that it made all of my blood rushed into my head. If emitting smoke and spitting fire were possible, I swear I was having them in that moment. My clenched hands became even tighter I could feel my nails digging into my own flesh. After a few seconds, a tinge of pain was felt. I raised both of my closed hands and opened them and certainly, fresh red blood was present. When I lowered them, the two were already gone… leaving me alone with the pain on my hand.


~~~


“Hello. I hope you did have a nice sleep last night and will have a great day today. We’ll be at the garden after school… I hope to see there. AI” The letter on my hand stated. A letter from her never skips a day that it became part of my morning routine. After reading everything, I folded it and placed it back into the envelope. I took a rectangular box from my knapsack and placed it there with the other letters she’d given me since fifth grade. And I was ready for the classes.


~~~
 

“There you are” a girl with her sweetest smile greeted me as I arrived.


“Hi Aichan” I replied “Where’s everyone?”  I added


“There, there and there” she said while pointing to the directions where her friends are.


I looked toward the directions where she pointed and there I saw Linlin looking pretty as always. She caught me smiling and waved with a pair of scissors in her hand. I panicked a little before I managed to say “Hi guys” generalizing my greeting. Like always, arriving at the garden completes my day.


~~~


The weekday past real quick, I was lying under the shades of a tree, waiting for the others to arrive. The sun was bright but the wind was cool. The prairie was so relaxing. It was so quite and tranquil, that all I could hear were the birds’ singing and the wind’s gentle blow, creating a serene ambiance that made my eyes threaten to close.


“Booh!”


“Jeeez, Aichan!” I shouted as my reaction queen mode was switched on. I was caught off guard.


“Hahaha. That was a fun sight”


“Fun sight?! Wait until I get a hold of you and you’ll see and experience a fun sight!”


I started the chase but she was so damn fast that I was left behind a several meters in just a second. And before long, she was already in the flower-strewn meadows, laughing and teasing me. And I was in her tail several meters away, trying real hard to catch up.


Stopping to take a breather, I bent and held my knees. Inhaling a mouthful of fresh air and exhaling afterward, I watched as Ai stopped and looked my way, still wearing her grin. She turned around and faced toward my direction, hands on her hips, eyes were twinkling, nostrils were flaring, and mouth was grinning displaying her nice set of teeth. I was there standing as I was trying to think of a plan on how to capture her.


I suddenly ran toward her direction but she also ran while letting out a squeal. She didn’t look my way, she just ran and hide in the long stemmed plants. I stopped, thinking my idea won’t work and so I switched to plan B, to run back and get my bike. There’s no way she could outrun my bike.


I hastily walked back in stealth to make her unaware as much as possible. After a minute of two, I was already on my bike about to pedal when someone called out my name.


“Risa, let’s stroll for a while, the others are not her yet”


“O-okay”


Linlin sat at the passenger seat and placed her arms around my waist. My body stiffened at the contact. It felt like I was on a cloud nine, my smile was from ear to ear, my heart jumped in uttered joy. I started our stroll and pedaled as gently as possible to make Linlin comfortable. I’d ask Linlin if she’s comfy from time to time, just to make sure she’s okay.


After a few minutes, the others arrived. We were pedaling on our own bikes, and would race sometimes, for hours. Time flew fast and it was almost sunset. Everyone gathered and sat on the ground, facing and watching the sun as it started to display its beauty. It was quite like always, until I remembered something, or rather, someone…


AICHAN!









~~~

Most of the above update’s not in the original story. Kinda scattered just like my brain      sumimasen   

~~~


Someone’s in my mind when I decided to add a very cracklicious joke at the end of every update. The jokes aren’t mine, they are from a friend, and I have no idea from where they originated. People, please be gentle    or not 

 
SKIT JOKE STA~TO

AI: Do you have a driver’s license?

RISA: Yes, why?

AI: Because you’re driving me crazy.

 
ME: HAHAHA

READER(S): -_-

ME: 


Jezzzzz 

Peace out!!!   

[alwaysYou]

.
.
.
When I lowered them, the two were already gone… leaving me alone with the pain on my hand.

just admit you do like her..stupid

“Risa, let’s stroll for a while, the others are not her yet”


“O-okay”

Linlin sat at the passenger seat and placed her arms around my waist. My body stiffened at the contact.

GAKILIN?!!!!!i can accept AiLin more..

It was quite like always, until I remembered something, or rather, someone…


AICHAN!

F***!!!!!!i really hate gakisan here
how can she just leave aichan there!!!!!
how can she leave just a lovely girl alone!!!!
asshole!!!!
i declare i'm hating gakisan more!!!

so now, aichan will disappear???
seem like i so wanna aichan to disappear..

next chp pls!!!

AI: Do you have a driver’s license?

RISA: Yes, why?

AI: Because you’re driving me crazy.

 
ME: HAHAHA

READER(S): -_-

ME: 

i do laugh..

[kRisZ]

lol


How's my skit joke?  That was written for BP 


EDIT:
 

[alwaysYou]

BP will thanks you.....

that was funny and lame..

but i still have to say..i hate gakisan..

[kRisZ]

I know it's lame    I was risking my very straight and clean reputation just for BP she should be thankful or else 

lol, Gaki here is Gaki here

[alwaysYou]

quoting from BP

straight and clean?! TSK..*turn away and walk off*

she doesnt seem to agree huh 

lol, Gaki here is Gaki here

i hope so..LOL!!!!
suddenly i dont wanna takagaki happening here..=x..
i just wan u to kill aichan..cos i hate gakisan
do i make sense?

[kRisZ]

quoting from BP

straight and clean?! TSK..*turn away and walk off*

she doesnt seem to agree huh 

She's ebil 

i hope so..LOL!!!!
suddenly i dont wanna takagaki happening here..=x..
i just wan u to kill aichan..cos i hate gakisan
do i make sense?

Yeah, your protectiveness over Ai is on duty now 


EDIT:
I'm going now... I need to do something 

Goodnight AABatt

[alwaysYou]

she not that ebil..you are the more ebil one..

protectiveness over Ai

hmmmm ..
yet i'm still ebil cause i wanna u to kill her..

good night..=)

[rndmnwierd]

You are killing me here! Who's interested in who?! Gaki in Lin? Gaki in Ai? Ai in Gaki? Tana in Gaki? What what what!? How could Risa forget about Ai?

AI: Do you have a driver’s license?

RISA: Yes, why?

AI: Because you’re driving me crazy.

I snorkled.

I'm not sure what you're imagining so ummm continue imagining

It's good... That's all I'll say.