Author Topic: R I V E R (MaYuki) + Extra chapters (06/07/2013) - FANFIC DELETED (Read 157184 times)

arisa03 · « **Reply #180 on:** October 17, 2011, 01:48:39 AM »

You're Welcome. Anyday is fine for any sort of criticizing moments

. ; v ; ///// (five left hands ftw).

Nyanoha · « **Reply #181 on:** October 17, 2011, 02:09:42 AM »

You are very welcome ZuZu

I'm glad my pain and fangirl-ness amused you so ;____;/ Also, stop over-thinking it BD

Now, for old times sake...sdjnvjasnvdjnakn HURRY UP AND MAKE MORE AWESOME-NESS

silllythings · « **Reply #182 on:** October 17, 2011, 02:27:23 AM »

thanks for writing an amazing story. looking forward to your future works!

Flean · « **Reply #183 on:** October 17, 2011, 02:35:51 AM »

WHAT!!! O_O! This fic already completed!!!

Argh!!!!!!!!

I haven't finish reading the whole chapters yet!!!!!!!!!!

I didn't even have the chance to leave a proper comment on your previous posts... waaa!!!

Gomen2..

but still, I would like to thank you for your full of awesomeness fic!!!

I'm looking forward for more awesome story...

Divine Vengeance · « **Reply #184 on:** October 17, 2011, 02:42:31 AM »

@dream_catcher: Good luck on your stories! I look forward to seeing your action :3

@Flean: LOL It's alright, take your time xD Feel free to comment much later if that suits you LOL Thanks for your comment though :3

Kid_Alpha · « **Reply #185 on:** October 17, 2011, 03:11:57 AM »

Since I'm a action junkie, as long as you've got guns and explosions etc. that make me go ADFADFSA I'm okay lol But you do have something MJGK related up your sleeve... /)_(\ Cannot contain my excitement.

River has always been my favorite song/PV, I could watch it over and over again ~~i'm not joking~~ so you can imagine my excitement when I found that someone wrote a story based on it, I was like 'WHO IS THIS WONDERFUL PERSON?'

Be waiting for that birthday fic yo~! And I hope you continue writing awesome stuff ;3;

Is it weird that while reading your fic I've came up with an idea of how Yuko joined Army48 after a failed unit called Doll's Vox? This is what happens when it's late and I drink a lot of soda...

ShibuyaDokiDoki · « **Reply #186 on:** October 17, 2011, 03:15:23 AM »

You're welcome! ^^ im always more than lad to see that you have updated... lol! and plus, this story is filled with things that I can actually imagine happening. River has been a great story and I love it. I would love to see you write more too!♥

Keep up the good work! I look forward to more of your works~~~~~♥♥♥

Vanui · « **Reply #187 on:** October 17, 2011, 04:12:35 AM »

LOL YES CUTE LITTLE BABIES FTW~

It's been quite a wild ride with River. I loved every step of the way through it! Great job with this beast of a story! I'm looking forward to more of your work, Nishi~

“’Thank you for everything,’ and ‘Yes, Major Takahashi,’ what’s next?” the major wailed as she buried her face in her hands, sobbing loudly. The other three girls in the room could do nothing but look on and weep as well as Takahashi Minami cried time away.

What's next? 8DDDDDDD

Forever the most epic accidental mood change in the world XDb

I will continue to support you, my friend! Thank you for your hard work!

haruhi16 · « **Reply #188 on:** October 17, 2011, 04:36:23 AM »

You're welcome! i like your fic, no, i love it! and of course i will still support your next fic! i'll just keep checking!

I'm not disappointed you end the story there, it was a happy ending for everybody!

Thank you for the awesome and badass fic! i'll wait for your next fic!

Haruko · « **Reply #189 on:** October 17, 2011, 04:53:27 AM »

cute ending!! thanx for the story!! atsumina its ok

Seigus · « **Reply #190 on:** October 17, 2011, 07:19:55 AM »

Here are my thoughts for the epilogue:
The moment that I've been dreading is finally here! Well, all good things have to come to an end but you did say that you'd be writing side stories and stuff so I'm glad!
The epilogue is an all-around happily-ever-after that our heroines deserved.
The opening had me smirking in front of my laptop with Acchan screaming her head off at her poor husband. "Stupid" is the word that binds this couple together

Then came the exchange between Takamina and Yuko.

Quote

“That’s… not my daughter, thank you,” Takamina said in a flat voice.

Yuko blinked, “Ah, no wonder… I was wondering why that one wasn’t jaw-droppingly gorgeous. Then again, she could have inherited your defective genes…”

HAHAHA! I can totally imagine this scene! These two midgets are LOL brothers for life!

I'm glad you didn't explicitly pair Miichan and Mariko together. It's not that I have anything against this pairing but it'd seem kind of forced if everyone belonged to a couple.

As my comment will not be complete without a mention of my OTP, I'm gonna say this:
MAYU AND YUKI'S BABY WILL BE THE NEXT MOST ADORABLE THING EVER!!!
Cyborg baby with huge round eyes FTW! (Actually, if I seriously try to imagine it, it's kinda freaky.)

Finally, my reply to your afterword:
I'm glad my comments helped you in one way or another but I feel bad for commenting so late for such an awesome story. I have Lurker's Syndrome but I decided that I needed to let you know how much I love and appreciate R I V E R. It's definitely up to par with the PV and it even exceeded it because there's only so much the PV can show us while you breathed life into the characters and made them not just cool chicks in uniforms but funny, loyal and real comrades-in-arms. I will definitely follow any side stories you post for River. One suggestion, if you don't mind, will be a look at what the girls got up to during their month-long vacation. And - this is just wishful thinking on my part - I'm keen to read how Yuki and Mayu got together. Aside from the fact that they are my OTP, I'm intrigued by their relationship because they tend to project this love-hate, flirting-bickering image.

Wow this comment is getting long

but I'm pumped up for the multi-chaptered stories you are working on! You have a flair for writing and managing a big cast. You give attention to every character so even if your focus is on a particular girl or pairing, the others won't be just wallflowers. Instead, they spice up the story! This, is what I really like about your writing. Keep up the great work and I look forward to more works from you!

P.S. Gosh, I had to retype everything above because the internet had to disconnect the very moment I clicked 'Preview'

Divine Vengeance · « **Reply #191 on:** October 17, 2011, 07:56:51 AM »

@seigus: Thank you VERY much for your long comment! I really appreciate the effort you put in replying ; v ;

Anyways, in response to the things you said:
I'm very glad the epilogue did not disappoint you xD I was a little worried that it wasn't enough of a wrap up, but I'm glad you found it to be enjoyable. Also, yes, I took the same stance with you on MariMii, disregarding whether I ship it or not xD

And don't feel bad about replying late xD ~~I'm very grateful that people actually reply at all. ;__;~~ I personally have lurker syndrome as well, so I understand how... awkward it can be to respond LOL Nevertheless, thank you again ; v ;
I'm also glad that I didn't fail your expectations in comparison with the PV

In regards to your suggestions, both ideas are definitely getting the creative juices in my head running LOL I'm actually extremely tempted to start working on one of them (Not telling you which just because I'm a troll like that

), but I'm actually supposed to be studying right now. OTL. Nevertheless, thank you for your suggestions! I shall try to come up with something that will hopefully entertain you ; v ;

Thank you also for your additional comments on my writing style. I was worried I didn't cover that aspect of the story that well, especially in regards to the large cast, which was quite a problem LOL Thank you for reassuring me in that department ; v ; b

... Tl;dr: You are an awesome reviewer, and thank you for your input and suggestions!

P.S. Thanks for going through the effort of typing that whole thing again

kahem · « **Reply #192 on:** October 17, 2011, 08:15:39 AM »

Awww! The end is so cute! They have child! <3
Thx for this fic which is really awesome and funny ^^ Be sure I'll read your next fic

Seigus · « **Reply #193 on:** October 17, 2011, 08:28:42 AM »

You troll, you!

I hope we are thinking of the same idea

Anyway, no matter what you come up with, I'm sure I'll be entertained.

Have more confidence in yourself! The comments from your readers are proof that you are on the right track with your writing. Of course it's good to be worrying every now and then as it prevents complacency but heck, you deserve to be proud of yourself!

Thanks for saying I'm an awesome reviewer

I wish I could comment more on the stories in this forum (or even write my own fic) but similar to you, I'm tied down by studies and work. I should be doing an assignment right now but I can't help constantly checking the fanfic board for updates.

Arakawa · « **Reply #194 on:** October 17, 2011, 09:30:16 AM »

I knew you wouldn't dissapoint (y)

Thanks for writing river, and lookin forward to whatever else you may write

blueangel65 · « **Reply #195 on:** October 17, 2011, 10:42:07 AM »

heHe!

You're weLcome and THANK YOU VERY MUCH TOO..

I'm very gLad that the story went well, and I'm very glad for you too..

Sorry

if I don't comment that much to you're story, but even if I'm not,
I've aLways leave a Thank You

as a mark that I like the story, heHe!

and aLso I'm not good in engLish..

and aLso for the AtsuMina, THANK
YOU VERY MUCH

, It was more than Good, heHe! and for the Last part, I LOL!
at AtsuMina and TakaYuu conversation, haHa!

weLL! I still have so many things
to say but I don't know how to say it..

But one thing I want to say is,
YOU ARE AWESOME!

I will still continue to support you after this, GoodLuck! and THANK YOU!

Kiiz · « **Reply #196 on:** October 17, 2011, 08:31:23 PM »

Thank you for this story. I very enjoy about it

even sometime... I'm busy and not comment...
but sure~ I will come to read your fic and give "Thank you" for you anyway

I will still support you after this

cmze · « **Reply #197 on:** October 19, 2011, 06:48:26 AM »

now i feel terrible!

i don't like when things end..i'm just that weird!

why this had to end??

great fic I LOVE IT! (mostly miichan)

thank you very much for post it!

Divine Vengeance · « **Reply #198 on:** October 20, 2011, 02:03:08 AM »

R I V E R

Extra I – [KojiYuu]
(Posted 10/20/11)

Warning: Mild language and violence ahead.

A/N: This takes place roughly half a year before the events in the main storyline of RIVER.

This is dedicated to Oshima Yuko, since this was the original chapter that was going to be released on her birthday xD

--<>--

[REDACTED]

--<>--

A/N:
This piece is also dedicated to arisa03/satsunyan for being such a good friend and putting up with my constant questions and whatnot ; v ; b I hope you enjoy this extra dedicated to your OTP ; v ;

Of course, thank you to everyone else who gave wonderful comments, as always <3

Obligatory Sathday update.

Kid_Alpha · « **Reply #199 on:** October 20, 2011, 02:06:30 AM »

~~ADFADS I WILL READ THIS LATER WHEN MY BIO CLASS IS OVER. >:|~~

EDIT: Ah that was sweet but lol at Yuko going overboard then again not surprising.

Ah I love Sathday updates~