REPLIES: kuro_black29: You and your "save spot" again
Ruka Kikuchi: Hope you'll enjoy this chap
Minami-chan: Glad you enjoy it.
purnamazaki: LOL sorry for the wait, I hope you'll enjoy this chap
gek geki: Nice idea~ We’ll see how things goes between wMatsui.
What is old Rena’s true desires? Some little Mayuki going on in this chap, so I hope you’ll enjoy it
niineechan: Hope you’ll enjoy this chapter too
chiqinna: Yeah, FINALLY! Hope you enjoy this chapter lah. I wonder what would happen to Rena after she regained all her memories, its going to be quite dramatic isn’t?
Would be interesting how Yuki would help Mayu out in such a tight situation.
kumabear: LOL, sorry~ I do take a while to update, I hope you’ll enjoy this chapter
AMNESIA: CH14
-
“…That concludes it all.”
Sae finally finished what he wanted to say, and realized that Mayu was remaining in silence with her eye closed. She stood up from her seat and rested both her palms against the table while keeping her eyes down onto the table without any respond. She tried to maintain her composure as much as she could before she finally utter the first word after Sae gave her the whole explanation about Yuki’s situation.
“…You’re lying.”
“I’m sorry, I wish this is a big fat lie. The best I could do is to stop lady Kikuyo from pulling that trigger. I might be the next leader of Miyazawa group engaged to you but I do not have that authority to match up against your mother.”
“Tell me that this is one of your foolish lie—”
“I wish it is. It is my fault, I’m the one to be blamed for putting Yuki in a vulnerable and difficult situation like this.”
“It doesn’t sound to me that you’re guilty about it.”
Mayu retorted back while she approached him to grab tightly onto his shirt collar. Usually she would maintain her composure, but not this time. She expressed her dissatisfaction and anger towards him and somewhat was unconsciously blaming Sae for putting Yuki into danger.
“I asked you to take care of her properly, if you did… this wouldn't have happened.”
“Feel free to blame me as much as you want. However, you should know her well. She simply wouldn’t back down when she made her final decision.”
“…Quit with the excuses already.”
“You know that woman more than I do. I threatened and warned her how dangerous this could be, and yet she still persist to go through all of this JUST for the sake of seeing you. Instead of you wasting your energy to blame me, just leave it for a while and lady Kikuyo will let Yuki go. She simply just wants to teach her a lesson to not interfere with the yakuza group recklessly like this.”
“…”
Mayu sighed and tried to catch her breath after her heart had been racing nonstop ever since she learned about Yuki’s whereabouts. She was obviously panicking…but she was doing her best to hide it from Sae. However, the man was smart enough to even feel the slight tremble coming from Mayu’s clutch. Her fiancé could tell that Mayu was definitely emotionally affected with what was happening with Yuki. It became much more clearer that this composed doctor easily lost her touch when it comes to nurse Kashiwagi… and Mayu’s reaction gave more than enough prove to him. He sighed and gripped onto her hands before giving a slight nudge to give her a sign that he could see through her mask. At situations like this, the young Watanabe couldn’t completely hide her emotions behind usual poker face.
“I know you’re frustrated. It seems when it comes to Yuki you’re…become more like a human being. Comparing to that cold heartless yakuza I met few days ago…it is as if I’m confronting a two different people, sharing a same body. I wonder which is the real
Watanabe Mayu?”
“…”
“You love her…don’t you?”
“…!?”
Mayu glared back without uttering a single word, and her eyes did all the talking instead. Sae had more than enough hints to know his fiance’s feelings towards the young nurse she worked with at the hospital. Somewhat he wasn’t surprised with it and remained in silence to give Mayu to time to at least calm down a little bit more before they continued the conversation.
“I admit, she’s very attractive…but I believe that’s all my male hormones doing the talking.”
“…You’re right. There’s no point to deny it anymore once its out.”
Mayu sighed and slowly took a few steps back before leaning against the working table behind her. Instead of raging or denying that fact, she accepted it calmly that it was already out there. She only kept her eyes down without giving any single reaction aside from pure sorrow. If they weren’t in such a difficult situation like this, Sae would like to use this to attack Mayu…but he had enough humane heart to not do that to her at this state. He actually sympathized for her. Mayu began shaking her head and mumbling things under her breath and only Sae could hear it. Presumably she didn’t want the guards outside the door to hear their conversation, one of them could be lady Kikuyo’s spy after all.
“Mom is holding her a hostage…no…a week? Seven days…this is not good…this is…no…this is bad…”
“Mayu, get a grip. If you start to chicken out right now then who the hell will help Yuki out?”
“…”
“I’m really not in a position to give any advice or suggestions, but do whatever you feel its right to do. I know the advice is shitty lame, but pretty much I don’t know what to say right now. That’s the best advice that could be said at this situation”
“…Pft.”
She couldn’t hold back her chuckle anymore and had to agree with Sae’s statement. His advice was ridiculously lame and obviously everyone would know that…however, it was actually something that she needed to hear. She was being very rational and realistic…but sometimes she needs to cast that aside and follows what she believe is right. However, she wondered what would be the consequence of what she wished to do right now.
“I wish, but things will go down if I do those crazy things—”
“Heh, since when we give a crap with this life and have anything to lose anyway?”
“…Hahaha…hahahahahaha!!!!”
Mayu cracked up and she couldn’t hold back her laugh anymore. Her stomach was cramping up and she had to take a number of deep breaths before she could give her response back to him. Miyazawa made a big point and she couldn’t help but to agree with it. Both of them are actually very similar in many ways. They are bound to their family’s responsibility…and their life have been decided ever since they’re born into the family. They never have a choice to live a life they truly wanted… In a way, Mayu might actually agree that Sae could pass as a male counterpart of her.
“You’re right…since when we give a crap of this life? Why didn’t I realize this at all…? My fear towards my mother is really affecting me. It’s been haunting me ever since I could even remember.”
“I got nothing to say about that. I feel you.”
In the midst of silence, no words were exchanged between the two. They made an eye contact with each other followed by a vague smile across their face. At least their conversation seemed to lighten up whatever burdens they both carried in their hearts. Despite they don’t seem to get along well at the beginning, they were able to have a good talk with each other.
“…If we didn’t meet in this sort of situation, I think we can be good friends.”
“We’re too alike in different ways that it creeps me out,
Mayu-sama.”
“Cut with that crap, will you?”
“Technically you’re my boss, and despite we’re engaged for a while…I thought I would fall in love with you due to how intellectual you are.”
“You thought huh?”
He smiled before he continued where he left off. He told her that he was actually attracted to her right on the first day they met at the hospital and exchanged words with one another. It was the first time he was able to debate with someone intensively and excitingly like this. He felt like something kept pulling him to Watanabe Mayu, and felt like this woman would be someone that he could potentially have romantic feelings for. However, it didn’t happen at the slightest even though he tried to fall in love with Mayu, his fiancé. He felt something was more than just a romantic feeling…a rivalry feeling? Friendship? Something other than that? Sae couldn't answer it either, and despite he had no words to explain but the message reached the young lady.
“…I know what you mean. I guess we both are just too similar to each other. It's the same feeling I have towards Jurina, we’re very close yet we shared no intimate feelings for one another. She’s someone I can trust my back to.”
“I see, I guess we can be good friends then.”
“Hmph, perhaps so, Sae.”
“As I expected…it’s pleasant talking to you, Mayu.”
“Despite we have a wrong start, it will be unfortunate to waste such an opportunity like this…”
Mayu muttered softly before she extended her hand towards him as her offer for a handshake. He was slightly amazed with her reaction and couldn’t help but to have more interest in this young lady. He could see such a strong heart filled with confidence through her eyes. That frustrated young girl somewhat disappeared from his sight, and only the young lady was in front of him. She had such an unwavering heart that it cleared all of the doubts in Sae’s mind.
“I’m not interested to marry you even though our families forces us to do so. I’m interested to get to know more about you…as a friend.”
“…”
“So, what do you say?”
“…Heh, I look forward to see what kind of future will you create and change. Besides that, wouldn’t be interesting to be a friend of the future boss of Yakuza group?”
Without hesitation, Sae grabbed her hand and they both had a firm handshake. Mayu had made Sae interested in her than before and he was actually looking forward to see what kind of future would this young lady create within the world of yakuza. He had a feeling, Mayu would be able to make life much more interesting and exciting than his current life. Due to Mayu’s unwavering heart, it made Sae decided to take the risk of siding with her just for the sake of watching what the his future leader would do in the near future.
“Unfortunately I must leave for a meeting with other representatives from other yakuza groups. Good luck to whatever you’re going to do, I look forward to see what kind of insanity you’re planning to pull.”
“That’s such a nice encouragement of you. There’s nothing much but catastrophe up ahead of me.”
“…But something about your catastrophe makes it so intriguing and appealing. Someone insane like you is capable of creating miracle. If you may excuse my leave, boss.”
Sae only smirked with joy as he made one great friend today. Before he could leave, Mayu only stared at him from behind and called his name calmly to catch his attention. Once he turned around the young lady thrust her fist forward towards him and it seemed she had something to give to him. Without any words, Sae extended his hand forward with curiosity and that was when young Watanabe dropped her engagement ring into his hand. It seemed after their talk, she didn’t need this anymore.
“That’s yours after all, I don’t need it anymore.”
“…Very well then, if you don’t mind if I use this for my next engagement.”
“Go nuts, do whatever you want with that thing. I don’t give a crap of it. Like I said, I don’t need it anymore.”
Sae smirked softly to himself and willingly accepted the engagement ring back. He could see from her eyes and her voice that Mayu had no longer have hesitations anymore. It seemed their friendly talk just now allowed her to follow what she believed without being restrained by fear. He couldn’t help but to extend another hand and ruffled her head like a little girl. At least, Mayu was a few years younger than him. Few seconds that young Watanabe was caught off guard, she brushed his hand away and had a puzzled look.
“What the hell was that for?”
“…I like your guts, Mayu.”
“Huh?”
“See you around, I’ll make sure to stay up to date with the results of your insanity.”
“…Hmph, just go away.”
“Very well then, boss.”
Sae left her without further ado and he actually supported his young friend to do the most insanity choice she could think of. However, Mayu felt like she was actually receiving support from him in an indirect way. She placed her hand on top of her heart and felt every heartbeat against her ribs. She allowed fear for her mother to overwhelm her and thus she wasn’t acting like how the usual ‘Watanabe Mayu’ would act. If she didn’t let that fear take part in her life any longer…then there’s nothing that would stop her anymore.
“Thanks Sae…you made me realized so many things, and understanding myself even more…I’ve always been a slave to fear without realizing it like a moron. However right now I’m…”
~THUDDDD!~
Rabutan heard a weird voice inside and entered the room without permission, and that was when she saw a trail of blood running down the corner of her mouth. It seemed the young reckless Watanabe punched herself too hard that she accidentally cut the corner of her lips. The young maid had a shock of her life and rushed to her master’s side with frustration without further ado.
“Mayu-sama! Are you okay??”
“Heh, just did a little too hard on myself, but that’s refreshing.”
She wiped her blood from the corner of her lips before she let out such a big energetic smile. Rabutan couldn’t believe her eyes and had a moment of speechlessness, as she couldn’t remember the last time she saw that bright smile from her master. The chains that shackled her disappeared and there was such a strong resolved portrayed through her eyes.
“Mayu…sama?”
“Rabutan, do you know where Yuki is?”
“Ah… yes, she’s actually at the office sector.”
“Mom is there too right?”
“…Unfortunately, yes. She haven’t left the office sector for few days already.”
“Well, that makes it easier.”
Mayu walked out from the room without further ado and the guards in front of the door were not expecting this. They rushed passed her to block the path as it was their duty to prevent Mayu from escaping at all cost. However, their actions didn’t make the young Watanabe wavered at the slightest. Rabutan ran out from the room to catch up with her master who approached the guards without fear.
“Mayu-sama, please return back to your room.”
“What if I choose not to?”
“…Then we don’t have a choice but to resolve with force. We cannot let you leave here without lady Kikuyo’s order.”
“Sorry, but I’m at the point of not giving a crap of anything right now. If you want to stop me much, then bring it on.”
The two guards froze on the spot as they felt Mayu’s heavy and yet intimidating aura. They could easily feel such overwhelming determination coming showing through her eyes and they unconsciously surrender to young Watanabe’s presence. Mayu simply walked passed them effortlessly and proceeded on. Rabutan was in a moment of awe just like the other two guards and when she finally snapped back, she rushed after her master immediately.
“Mayu-sama—”
“What’s with the commotion?”
An old man came out from the room into the hallway where Mayu was walking through. Howver, she froze on the spot with surprise and then they made a silent eye contact with each other. As Rabutan finally caught up with her master, she had a chill down her spine the moment she met with this old man…the current leader of Watanabe Group, Watanabe Ichiro.
“Dad…”
“Ah, I knew it that it would be you that made those noises outside.”
“…”
“So, you’re planning to stand up against your mom?”
Mayu remained in silence as her dad threw her a question. Her actions obviously spoke for itself that she’s going to be standing up against her mother, and Ichiro was wondering whether his daughter was well prepared for it or not. That instant the young lady made an eye contact with her father, he was quite surprised by it. The life and burning passion her Mayu’s eyes showed how determined she was to move on…and there’s no such thing as regret hinted in her eyes at all.
“I don’t have anything to lose to you, mom or Watanabe group…except for one thing.”
“Hmm?”
“
Her safety. No matter what it takes, even if it costs my life…I’ll use it to protect her from anything that will to harm her. Her wellbeing and safety means everything to me now.”
“…I see, who is this lucky lady that have my daughter’s love?”
“You wouldn’t know her, dad.”
“That’s why I want to know who is this young lady.”
Her father had such a calm aura but so calm that it became frightening. He had an opposite aura from Mayu’s mother, but his tranquil presence was as heavy as Kikuyo’s…or maybe even more than that. Whilst lady Kikuyo was the fierce wild beast, Ichiro would be the gallant peaceful one. Even though Mayu was someone that’s very skilled in reading human’s reactions and emotions…but she couldn’t predict a single thing that was going on in the back of her father’s mind. His peaceful smile was just so soothing, but yet terrifying to Mayu.
“…Her name is Kashiwagi Yuki. Right now, mom is holding her custody due to her stupidity to speak up against her in one of her meetings.”
Mayu was very blunt and just stated how Yuki was being stupid with her actions; it seemed in such a tough frustrated situation like this, her sarcasm is still active. However, Yuki’s name caught her father’s attention and he had a moment of trance as he felt so familiar with that name.
“Kashiwagi…that name…”
“Dad? What’s wrong?”
“Correct me if I’m wrong…Is her father Kashiwagi Azuma?”
“H-How did you know that?? He’s the one of the directors of the hospital I work—I mean…the hospital I used to work at.”
“Ah I see…that’s why…hmph.”
He only smiled softly to himself and seemed to be having some thoughts behind his peaceful mask. Obviously it made young Watanabe curious and wondered how did her father knew about the head director of the hospital. She thought about countless possibilities that her father might possibly know Yuki, or not. However, her father’s expression was too calm that she couldn’t possibly predict anything at all.
“Normally I would’ve to stop you, but if you have decided to go…then I don’t see the point of stopping you.”
“Ichiro-sama!?”
“D-Dad…?”
“However, the person you’re confronting no other than your mother, who’s probably the most scariest person of Watanabe Group. She’s far wiser and has more experience than you in everything. To confront Kikuyo is the very last thing anyone wants. Despite you know that well, are you ready to challenge and confront against her?”
“Like I said, I don’t have anything to lose! With everything I have left, I’ll use it to protect her…to protect Yuki from Watanabe group and mom!!”
The young daughter declared loudly of her resolution in her actions. That heat of moment, Ichiro saw a reflection of another young woman behind Mayu and couldn’t hold back his smile of relief at all. It seemed he met someone that had the same exact eye as Mayu in the past, which made him beamed a nostalgic smile out. He walked up to her and gave her a warm pat on the head. His gentle actions caught her off guard and stared back at her father with awe.
“D-Dad?”
“What is it that you’re willingly to pay to get out from here without being stopped?”
“Eh?”
“You must be very familiar with our
golden rule. You must pay equivalently to what you wish to have. I’ll give you the authority to leave here without being interfered, but what is it that you will pay for it?”
Her father spoke up the golden rule of Watanabe group…and it was one of the things she was forced to remember ever since she could read and write. The young girl nodded and glared back at her father without any tinge of hesitation or fear in her eyes. She was more than prepared for this ever since she could remember.
“My life. I’ll do everything…and I’ll fulfill my duty as the succeeding leader of Watanabe Group.”
“…Very well then. By this year, you’ll need to bear a child. If you accept the deal, you’re more than free to go and do anything as you please. I’ll grant you the authority to be the
Leader of Watanabe Group temporarily.”
“W-What??”
“That’s my deal, what do you say?”
“M-Mayu-sama…”
Rabutan was standing on the spot and worried about her master…basically what Ichiro was saying was for Mayu to trade her life’s freedom for the sake of saving this one girl that she loved. Obviously the young servant wouldn’t agree for such a thing…she was Mayu’s retainer ever since they’re just little kids until now, and it’s obvious that she deeply cared for Mayu more than just a servant-master relationship. She wished that her stubborn master wouldn't do something stupid like that…but at the same time she knew the answer already. Her master, Watanabe Mayu, was more than ready to sacrifice anything for Kashiwagi Yuki. Meanwhile, young Watanabe remained in silence and made an eye contact back to her father…and her eyes had no tinge of hesitation in it.
“…Thank you, dad.”
Mayu bowed her head down slightly before she walked passed him without any single word. With her actions, she accepted her father’s condition and she couldn’t explain how relief she was right now. Without any more hesitation in her heart, Mayu’s one and only destination is Watanabe Office Sector…where her mother held Yuki in custody. As for Rabutan, she was completely lost and had no clue what to do at that point. She wondered she should follow Mayu or not…but that would mean she’s a traitor to Watanabe group. At that midst of moment she’s pondering anxiously, Ichiro approached her and gave her a soft tap on the shoulder to catch her attention.
“Go with her if you wish so, don’t worry, only Mayu will be the one that receives the consequences.”
“I-Ichiro-sama…”
“Do what is right, after all…right now, Watanabe Mayu is the current Leader of Watanabe Group, not me. Besides that, she is your
master after all.”
His words made her remembered the first day she pledge her eternal loyalty to Mayu…and ever since then, the young Watanabe has always be her one and only master. The current leader gave the young maid a nudge forward once again and no words were exchanged between the two. She had a deep breath before she turned back to him and gave a 90° bow as her gratitude to his kindness.
“Thank you, Ichiro-sama. Excuse my leave.”
Rabutan ran after Mayu to catch up with her and the old man just simply stay back and watch the new young generations stepped up their game in this old-fashioned society they’re in. Ichiro could remembered his daughter’s eyes so clearly and couldn’t help but to remind him of this young lady who had the exact same burning passion in her eyes like Mayu. It made him wonder how far would the young Watanabe’s determination would take her…and what future would be waiting for her.
-
“Mayu-sama!”
Rabutan finally catch up with her master and stood in her way. She was puffing while their eyes met…and Mayu chose not to say a word and just moved to the side to proceed on. She bit her lips and grabbed her master’s arm to pull her attention towards her completely.
“MAYU!! Listen to
ME!”
“…!?”
That instant, the young servant threw the honorific away and caught Mayu’s attention in an instant. The young master was surely surprise that her servant raised her voice up like that, and before she could say anything else, Rabutan interrupted her and spoke her heart out.
“You’re reckless, too straightforward, and a moron. You always like to hide everything in your heart and never rely on anyone for help no matter what…and that really does hurts and pisses me off. Despite I’m just a servant, it feels like crap when I can’t do anything to help you…as a friend.”
“Rabutan…?”
“No matter how hard and many obstacles are in the path you choose…I’ll walk with you, and fight with you.”
“I don’t want you to risk your life for my reckless—”
“Stop thinking you’re alone already!”
Mayu was interrupted and flinched back after her retainer rose up her voice against her. That was when another individual entered the conversation. One of them was applauding Aika’s speech towards her master and both herself and Mayu turned around to meet with unexpected guest.
“Finally someone said something. You would look ridiculously weird if you run in to save your princess with that outfit, Mayu-chan.”
She threw a bag towards her and Mayu caught it instinctively. That was when she realized that her casual clothes were packed inside it neatly. Slowly looking up towards another alluring lady, she walked up to her and gave Mayu a nudge right in the middle of her sternum.
“I agree with Rabutan, you’re such a troublesome master.”
“M-Miyuki??”
“Sorry for being very late to help you out, I just got back today from Hokkaido meeting with Yamamoto group. After I heard that you got into deep trouble with Kikuyo-sama, ”
Miyuki beamed her friendly smile to both Mayu and Rabutan and she continued from where Mayu’s young servant spoke. She flicked her finger right onto young Watanabe’s forehead and that made caught her off guard in an instant. Futhermore, Miyuki had no guilty conscious or what she did and only smiled with enjoyment. It seemed both Miyuki and Mayu are quite close to each other that she didn’t care Mayu is the succeeding leader of Watanabe group.
“Ow! Miyuki that actually hurts!! What was that for??”
“That’s your fault for being so reckless and such a troublesome.”
She pouted softly and Miyuki walked to Rabutan’s side before she turned back to make an eye contact with Mayu. Both retainers smiled and hoped that their message would reach their master. Meanwhile, the young Watanabe was anxious with what to do with the two of them and she couldn't help but stare back at Miyuki, because she’s not currently Mayu’s servant like Rabutan.
“Miyuki…you’re not my retainer, so why are you—”
“Just shut up, you idiot~ I’m coming with you, so just suck it up.”
“To argue with you is the worse thing I could ever want…”
Mayu couldn’t be bothered arguing with Miyuki, because she would be able to make her lose utterly. The young master looked back at her two friends, and realized that they don’t have any intention to move out of the way until Mayu accepted them to join the path she’s walking down. She sighed once again and ruffled her hair as a sign of giving up.
“…You guys keep calling me stubborn and reckless, aren’t you two too?”
“Just like you.”
They responded with unison back to her and it made Mayu sighed once again. However, she let out a smile of relief that she had such a great friend that would walk down the path she chose no matter what. Without further ado, she removed her kimono out and get into her casual clothing. It seemed Miyuki brought her favorite blue parka and she wore it with nostalgic feelings. Once she came out from the room where she was changing her clothes, she saw her two friends waiting for her with a welcoming smile. It seemed Miyuki picked the right clothes for Mayu after all. She felt very comfortable in this outfit of hers: favorite blue parka and long indigo jeans.
“…Miyuki, I’ll need your assistance to infiltrate the office sector.”
“Hehe, this sounds like Mission Impossible! Leave it to me, I know all the secret passages and places to infiltrate without being caught~ Even it is lady Kikuyo!”
“Thanks, I’ll leave that to you…let’s go now.”
“Yes ma’am!”
~XXX~
It has been few days since that day they went on a date. Ever since then, the two of them have been acting very normal with each other, and somewhat pretended that the kiss they shared didn’t exist or never happen. Like any other days once again...that another 'RENA' appeared and talked to her again...and it seemed she started to appear much more frequently than before.
(Another lunch with Jurina eh?)“…So what if I am?”
(How interesting to see how far can you pretend with those feelings?)“You…should learn to shut up once in a while”
(You’re telling ME to shut up? Hehehehehe! You’re just funny…Rena-chan)“Shut UP—!!”
~KNOCK~
In the midst of Rena and dark Rena’s conversation, a knock interrupted them. She awkwardly walked up to the door to see who it was and it turned out to be Dr. Airin, who came to pay her a visit. The young raven-haired girl had a moment of surprise when she saw him, but eventually a warm smile appeared across her face. Both Yuki and Mayu are not around and with the awkward situation between her and Jurina made Rena had no one to go to for comfort or even have some peace.
“Airin-san?”
“Sorry I came without giving you a heads up. I didn’t expect I would have a long break today so…yeah, I thought of paying you a visit. Are you busy or anything?”
“Not at all! I’m just relaxing, and being bored in my room like usual.”
“How’s your therapy going? Are you starting to remembering things?”
“Little by little. Things started to come back to me…but I’m still missing the big piece of the picture. All the memories…are all scattered and not connecting with each other.”
“I see, don’t worry about it. I know everything will be fine.”
He gave her a pat along with a gentle smile for her. In such a tough situation like this, Dr. Airi would be the one and only person that Rena could go to for consultation or even a friendly talk. Jurina used to always be that person to her but…after that night, everything changed. Rena could even tell that Jurina was emotionally pushing herself away from her to create a border between the two: that border that must not be crossed. However it was not just Jurina who was pushing away…Rena was doing the same thing too. The younger Matsui was consciously refusing to allow her feelings for Jurina to grow.
“Rena-chan, do you want to go have a walk? It might be a bit boring since you know the whole interior of the hospital already, but it’s more fun than being inside the room the whole day.”
“I would love to, Airin-san.”
They both left the room and then the male doctor accompanied Rena while they have a wander around the hospital. They watched the same old view that they likely saw every single day, but with a friend it makes things livelier. They went to the cafeteria to buy a cup of coffee and went into the convenience store to buy snacks or drinks for Rena to store in her room.
“The hospital just recently renovated the park area, are you interested to come with me to check it out?”
“Ah yes, I heard about that from Jurina, and we should!”
Being with this doctor who was much older than her made her felt at ease…similar to how she felt when she was with Jurina, Yuki, or Mayu. It was that gentle aura radiating out from them that made her able to find a peace in her mind by just being around them. She could see that Airi looked more relaxed than the last time she met him, and she was glad that he doesn’t look as anxious anymore. In their last meeting, Airi told her that he was going through some tough things and it was probably making him anxious.
“Airin-san, is your problem solved?”
“Huh?”
“You seemed to look more relaxed than the last time we met. I like it more when you smile, and not doing that worried face.”
“Rena-chan…”
“O-Oh, sorry for being nosy! I’m saying stuffs without thinking again…I’m so—”
“No, not at all…I should say, thank you Rena-chan. It feels nice to have someone to worry about you when you’re down.”
“U-Uhm…you don’t have friends?”
“Well…a few, but most of them are VERY busy like I am. Even though we have things that are bothered in our minds, we don’t exactly share family matters with one another.”
“How about your family?”
“My parents are always busy. I doubt they even know I’m actually anxious with a lot of things.”
“Any…siblings?”
Rena was running out of what to say and she was simply narrowing things down in order to extend the conversation for a little longer. At least, she hoped that she could pick up some few words Airi spoke up and continued it from there. But so far, his answers were not exactly making the conversation going anywhere. The more they talked about his worries the more Rena could feel a tinge of melancholy on his face.
“I actually have one younger sister, she’s a couple years older than you and she’s actually studying abroad right now. She’s extremely busy and studious.”
“Wow…that sounds amazing.”
“So yeah, even my family is too busy to hear or understand how I’m feeling. However, that’s part of being an adult, to just tough up and deal with it. I’m used to it and have been dealing with a lot of things throughout my life like that.”
“But I think we always need someone, once in a while. Sometimes…we can’t handle everything all alone.”
Rena somewhat disagreed with what Airi said. In some ways…she felt like Airi shared the same vibe as Jurina in a way. Both of them carried the burdens and bottle up their emotions to themselves without any intention to rely on others. How ironic, that it was something that both Mayu and Jurina taught her…but then her sister doesn’t exactly do what she said. Her words seemed to make Airi have a speechless moment. Young Matsui hoped her words reached the doctor and it took him quite a while before he could reply back to her.
“Wow, that was deep, and thanks Rena-chan. I need that slap in the face.”
“I-I didn’t mean to do that! I-I’m so sorry Airin-san!”
“Hey don’t worry! You’re actually right. No matter how strong the person is, you will need a person to lean on at times. Thank you, Rena-chan.”
Airi let out a smile of relief after he received Rena’s wise words. Despite he knew that fact very well, it felt different when someone said that to him. That was when he began telling what was bothering him for years…and even until now it’s still making him anxious and frustrated. Furukawa family was filled with medical professions, literally. His grandparents were doctors, his father is a doctor whilst his mother is a medical laboratory scientist. His uncle and aunts are doctors, pharmacologists, pharmacists, chiropractors, or any medical professions out there. Therefore, it would be obvious that his cousins would be in the medical profession too, just like him. He had a cousin that was more talented and highly likely a genius too…and Airi felt that his father and other family members obviously compared him to his cousin. They’re both doctors, and also in the same specialty too. Despite his cousin is a nice person…he couldn’t help but to harbor anger and grudge towards that relative of his that did nothing wrong to him at all. Airi started to hate himself for being immature and directed his frustration to his cousin like a jealous child.
“Even though everyone says that my father is not comparing me to my cousin…but I’m sure deep down he does. We both are just too alike to not be compared. There will always be a ‘better’ doctor between the two of us.”
“Airin-san…”
“Sorry to make you hear all of this Rena-chan, I’m quite immature, aren’t I?”
“No, not at all! Isn’t that just normal for all of us…? We do have feelings, and its normal for us to feel like that. Even you’re a great doctor, we’re both are just humans that can be happy…and angry.”
“…”
“Airin-san, I think I can relate to how you feel…I’m currently going through a lot of conflicting emotions and accepting things I wished I can deny, but it’s still me anyway. I’m not a nice girl like what you and everyone sees…I’m pretty sure I’m a selfish brat too.”
“Rena-chan…”
“I guess that makes us the same! So yeah…I understand your burdens and the pain, and it does feel nice when you say it, isn’t?”
Rena’s innocent smile made Airi’s day. He blushed slightly with how radiant this girl next to him could smile after hearing his dark confession. This young Matsui was like an angel that came to help him and he unconsciously let out a gentle smile across his face. Airi’s smile was just so sincere and pure that it caught Rena’s attention in an instant, and that was more than enough to tell her that the troubled doctor felt slightly better in some ways. He paused for a moment before looking up into the deep blue sky silently while allowing himself to calm down. Rena just stood there with him without saying a word, and hoped that she was able to help this poor doctor go through his tough times. It didn’t take him that long before he looked back down to make an eye contact with Rena before beaming out a smile of relief.
“Thank you, Rena-chan. I’m glad that it’s you hearing me out.”
“I’m glad that I’m capable of helping you out, even just a little!”
“You did more than just little…you listened to what I had to say to make myself feel slightly better, thank you.”
“I guess that’s what friends are for, isn’t?”
“Hehe, yeah…you’re right.”
For some reason, Rena realized that Airi had a moment before he replied back to her but she didn’t pay much attention to it. They continued walking around the garden and realized how much change was made. More flowers were planted, and the old pathway was renovated as well. They actually have a playground corner for kids as well, and overall there were a few additional things added. After they completed one little detour round, Airi checked his watch and realized that he needed to return back to his duty once again.
“I have to return back in 10 minutes, sorry that this is over for today.”
“That’s okay! I enjoyed talking around like this, and we did have a great talk.”
“Yeah we did, I’ll escort you back to your room.”
“If you’re in a rush, that’s fine! I don’t want you to be late.”
“It’s all good, plus…I have something I want to talk to you about.”
As they were walking back, Airi seemed to be slightly nervous and have been taking been breaths every now and then. Obviously, it made Rena wondered but all she could do was waiting for him to be ready to speak to her. Maybe he had something very important he wanted to say and that’s why he was taking his time to prepare himself? Rena had such an innocent thought and just simply wait for him to be ready to speak up, but he was surely taking too long being in silence like this.
“Uhm…you don’t have to tell me now, there’s no rush! We can always talk, and we can always do it next time!”
“…No, it has to be now. Sorry that I’m a little nervous, because this is going to be my first time doing something like this.”
“Hm?”
“Rena-chan…I…think I really do like you.”
~XXX~
Being held captive in this place for days and Yuki didn’t know what to do aside from staying still in the room. The maids and others didn’t bother to speak to her and they simply did their job --- keeping her alive and captive. Ever since that day, Mayu’s maid named Aika never came back to visit her again and she wondered how was the situation outside right now. No one knew about her coming to Watanabe’s household aside from Sae, who helped her in. Obviously others outside would be worried about her and she slowly walked towards the window into the gardens. At least eh beautiful scenery of the garden kept her entertained in this endless boredom. She wondered how long she would have to be here…and constantly reminded herself how useless she is to Mayu. In the end, she couldn’t do anything for her at all after all the things Dr. Watanabe had done for her. She sighed and rested her against the window frame that was in between her and the outside world. Yuki actually started to wonder whether Mayu’s world and her world is just too different from each other…and that there’s nothing she could do. At times like this that she needed advice…the only person she could think of is Mayu. The sarcastic doctor had been by her side the entire time without fail…ever since she knew Mayu. The time she’s been locked up in this room gave her time to reflect so many things that she didn’t see for all these years they’ve known each other.
“Mayu…I…”
She closed her eyes and reminisced about her past that she went through tough life moments…with Mayu by her side. It was when she was still traumatized by her mother’s death…and Jurina didn’t exactly know what to do aside from being by Yuki’s side…but that didn’t exactly help the poor girl overcome the grief. That was when Jurina asked Mayu for help…
-///-
“Yukirin, I heard everything from Jurina.”
“…”
“It’s been like what, 2 weeks already? Jurina was hopeless with helping you feeling better so she called me over.”
“…”
“Oi, reply me, will ya?”
“…”
“Jeez…BAKARIN!!”
Mayu pinched both her cheeks and stretched as much as Yuki’s cheeks could possibly go and that gave the grieving girl a huge shock of her life. Kashiwagi screamed and then smacked Mayu’s hands away from her face with anger. She was already sad with her mother’s death and now she had to deal with this sarcastic son of a bitch that’s annoying her right now.
“Just get the fuck out Mayu! You don’t understand how I’m feeling!!”
“DUH! I won’t! My mom didn’t die, she’s alive, and crazily scarier than a demon.”
“…Just get out, leave me alone.”
“It took me bloody 2 hours to get here, I’m not leaving here.”
“Then just get the hell out from my room.”
“Hell no. Since when you could order me around like that? Have respects for someone older than you, kid.”
That instant, Yuki was snapped and slapped Mayu right across her face with all the strength she had. It was a very loud slap that even Jurina who was standing outside could hear it. Young Jurina flinched with surprise…but she knew that she could trust Mayu for whatever she was doing…she knew that Mayu knew what Yuki needed the most right now. As for the grieving girl, Mayu could see so much anger and hatred in her eyes towards her…and that slap actually hurt a lot more than she anticipated.
“You’re not acting like one, and you DON’T DESERVE IT!!! Just get the FUCK out of here MAYU!!! You’re making it worse! You don’t understand! My mom died! RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! She died right there and I…I-I can’t do anything but just watch her die…!”
Yuki broke down into tears and let those feelings run out…and that was when she felt a warm big hug from Mayu. She didn’t say a word, just hugged Yuki, tightly, and granted her security… this crazy sarcastic friend intentionally provoked Yuki to let her burst out her emotions that was bottling up inside her out…Mayu took all the insults and curses just for Yuki’s sake. Young Kashiwagi cried out loud with all her heart out while holding onto Mayu tightly…and Watanabe hugged her tightly without any intention of letting her go at all. After she let her tears out for about 30 minutes…Yuki never felt this much relieved ever since the day her mother passed away. Mayu just sat down right in front of her and held her hand tightly without saying a word to her until she could see that Yuki was ready to talk with her.
“…Mayu, I—”
“Humans always feel better after they let out their emotions that are bottled up inside them, so…you feeling better now?”
“…Yes…”
“Good~ that’s all that matters.”
Yuki’s eyes grew wide with surprise…and that was when she realized Mayu did that intentionally to let Yuki express her emotions out instead of holding back inside her fragile heart. While she was making eye contact with Mayu, she could see a tiny bruise on her friend’s cheek…and that reminded her she actually slapped Mayu with full strength without any intention of holding back. She instantly felt guilty and extended her hand forward to cup her cheek. The moment her smooth cold hands touched Mayu’s cheek, she flinched back slightly with pain, and that was when Yuki felt even worse with what she did to her.
“I-I’m really sorry Mayu…I really did hit you…really hard.”
“I know that, you nasty bakarin…you hit me without any hesitation.”
“Hey! You don’t have to make me feel any worse than th—”
“But you feel much better than ever right?”
“…Yeah.”
“Like I said, that’s all that matters right now. If you feel better, then the 2-hrs of traveling here is worthwhile.”
There’s no encouragement or anything…only but simple indirect kindness from Watanabe. She patted Yuki’s head and the young girl began to cry again, but not of sadness anymore. She dove right into Mayu’s arms and then they both fell onto the floor…Mayu was startled that this crybaby broke down into tears again on top of her and she sighed once again.
“Crying AGAIN??? Jeez, give me a break. Aren’t you such a crybaby?”
“S-Shut up! Just let me cry you idiot!”
“Yah yah, whatever…”
Mayu just let herself relax on the floor while Yuki cried on top of her like a spoiled child. Both of them didn’t think about how long had Yuki been crying with Mayu around her. That sarcastic asshole friend just remained in silence…and stayed by Yuki’s side without any intention of leaving her at all. The force and warmth from Mayu’s hand comforted Yuki’s fragile heart…and gave her the strength to stand up and move on.
…That wasn’t just the only one case that Mayu was with her. That sarcastic pain in the ass friend of hers was always there…and she was the best with helping Yuki stand up with her own strength. Despite Mayu could be such an asshole to her…Kashiwagi honestly knew that she would always give a best advice for her. She remembered the first started working in the hospital and her first operation room experience was with Mayu, the talented heart surgeon. She was renowned to be the worse doctor to work it because of how talented she was…and Yuki experienced it the HARD way. She passed the wrong tool to Mayu and that was when the doctor threw it across the room and yelled at her.
“What ARE you doing!? Are you STUPID!?”
“…!!”
“Pass me the SCAPEL.”
“Y-Yes!”
“FORCEPS!”
“Yes!”
“SUCTION TU--Does this look like a suction tube to you!?”
"H-Here!"
Mayu was being very harsh to Yuki and obviously she was very frustrated the entire time…but at least the operation went well. After everything was over, everyone left one by one and Yuki was 2nd last one whilst Mayu was still doing some few things in the operation room. This was the first time Yuki was working as Dr. Watanabe’s nurse partner…as she made her previous partner quit the O.R. (operation room) job. Other staff came up to Yuki and comforted her after she had to go through all the yelling and scolding from Mayu. They suggested her to ignore what Mayu had to say because she’s just too harsh to everyone that she worked with due to how talented she was…no one could keep up with her. They invited her to come join their tea break, but then Yuki declined politely because she needed to do some few things. She looked for the doctor and asked the cleaners around the CCU (Coronary Care Unit) about Mayu’s whereabouts. She probably had left the operation room already.
“Uhm, do you know where did Dr. Watanabe go?”
“She’s still in the O.R. as usual.”
“Eh?? She’s still there?? Why…?”
“Fufu, you should see it for yourself.”
The cleaning lady smiled while making Yuki purely curious with it. She returned back to the room where they operation ended and saw Mayu checking the equipment and the counting the number of tools on the table to make sure nothing was missing. She entered innocently and it caught Mayu’s attention immediately.
“You’re still here? The operation is done, go take a break.”
“What are you doing?”
“Checking that no tools are missing.”
“Wait…isn’t that the nurse’s job?”
“They did, but there’s nothing wrong to do a triple check just in case something went wrong…what is actually being gambled is not my life, but our patient’s life. Don’t forget that, okay?”
“…”
“So, get lost, why are you still here for?”
“Just don’t mind me, I just want to watch and wait for you.”
“Huh? Do whatever you want then.”
Mayu said straightforwardly to nurse Kashiwagi and that was when she was caught completely off-guard with her answer. This was actually what the cleaning lady meant…the side that no one bothered to see --- Mayu’s dedication to her work. She was being nasty and insanely cruel to her teammates was because for the patient’s sake. She didn’t think about she needed to be all nice and sweet to make good friends with them…all she cared was patient’s life, and other things didn’t matter. It made her felt slightly ashamed that she had a moment she felt like Mayu was just a bully to people who were less smarter than her…and she just had to apologize.
“I’m sorry Mayu.”
“What now?”
“That moment, I felt like you’re just bullying me for fun…but actually, you’re very dedicated to your job…I’m sorry for being a fool and not see that.”
“…Maybe I’m just too nasty at times, that’s why my previous partner quit being an O.R. nurse. But if my partner can’t understand me, then we can’t save the patient at our best potential. Without any sync between the surgeon and their nurse partner, its just plain downfall.”
“I see, you’re just picky, Mayu.”
“Whatever kirin.”
“Oi, stop calling me that already! It’s Yuki! YU-KI!”
“Oh whatever kirin.”
“Ugh…you’re just so annoying like always!!”
“Aside from your annoying whining right now...You did well today, nurse Kashiwagi.”
Mayu let out a vague smile that caught Yuki’s attention. She was actually complimenting the nurse for her first job at the operation room…and then the doctor continued with how Yuki was able to bounce back on her feet after she was being pressured, yelled, and scolded…and that actually impressed Dr. Watanabe.
“You’ll be a great nurse, and you’ll be able to save many lives with that perseverance to continue of yours. ”
“M-Mayu…?”
“Do you want to be my nurse partner in CCU? I like your guts!”
“M-Me?? But I’m still inexperienced—”
“I’ll teach you everything that you need to know, trust me, I’ll make you the be the BEST O.R. nurse of this hospital.”
“You’re just exaggerating.”
“C’mon, believe in yourself you moronic giraffe. You might not be as genius or talented as Jurina and I, but you have that undying persistence and guts to continue no matter how hard and tough it is.”
Mayu took off her gloves and went towards Yuki to pat on her head, gently with such strong confidence in Yuki. Despite how Mayu would always like to bully her…she had to admit that through Mayu’s strict yet gentle training and guidance during after working hours… She became a renowned nurse that many ICU (intensive care unit), CCU (coronary care unit), and ER (emergency room) doctors would be grateful to have nurse Yuki as a part of their operation team due to her reputation in being precise and delicate in such a pressured situation. It was all because of Mayu teaching her and refining her skills every night after their shift. Sometimes…Mayu stayed up after 20 hours of being in the shift for the sake of teaching Yuki instead of catching some sleep…
“You can go to sleep you know? We can always do this later—”
“There’s no later. What if we have a patient tomorrow? Refine and train your skills and knowledge as if you’ll have an emergency patient coming in ANY second…and that’s how we can save as much lives without having any regrets.”
“…Okay! Then hang in there with me, don’t fall asleep, okay?”
“You owe me a cup of coffee when I wake up again.”
Mayu was horrible with accepting thanks from people, and she would just shake it off with sarcasm…but those that didn’t understand her would never see that sweet side of hers that Yuki could feel. Now that Kashiwagi reminisced her past…she couldn’t stop smiling and didn’t even realize tears ran down her cheeks. She couldn’t understand why she was crying, but all she knew was that she missed those days…with Mayu being an asshole yet compassionate. That’s Watanabe Mayu’s form of benevolence that maybe just Jurina and Yuki could see and feel it. -///-
She missed her…Yuki missed Mayu. The more she realized that Mayu couldn’t live in the same world as her…it made more tears burst out like a waterfall. It felt as if there was a huge rupture in her heart that couldn’t be repaired or healed…for some reason, the fact that Mayu would disappear from her life was too much for her to handle it. She hated how she was hopeless and helpless without Mayu around her…she was able to stand strong, and being accepted among her colleagues because of Mayu standing behind and supporting her. She hated how she never realized how much Dr. Watanabe had done for her for all these years…ever since they knew each other. She tightened her first and did her best to hold back her cry so no one outside could hear her. She was completely infuriating with herself on how she was completely useless to Mayu…and couldn’t do anything for her even just as a friend. She banged her fist against the wall to express her anger…she continued doing that just for the sake of hurting her hands…to feel ever inch of physical pain she was inflicting upon herself.
“Dammit…! Dammit…! DAMMIT…!! Why am I so useless…Why…!? Mayu…I’m so sorry...I-I…!”
She used all the cursing words that ever existed upon herself to do self-inflicting pain at an emotional level. At least she was receiving some form of pain, but she knew that this couldn’t be compared to what Mayu had to go through at all… and what was even worse was that she had been denying these feelings that was growing inside her heart for all these years. She realized how it felt different to be with Jurina and Mayu. When she was with Jurina she felt her heart fluttering and butterflies in her stomach the entire time…and having that exciting-like feeling the entire time.
However it was complete opposite with Mayu, she felt like she was at ease or at ‘home’ whenever she was at Yuki’s side. There was no excitement or anything inside her heart…only but comfort and peace. Mayu was actually the person that Yuki would want to go back to after having a rough and tiring day. She wondered for how long she had been harboring these feelings…but due to how they have such a silly friendship with each other…Yuki unconsciously suppressed and casted aside the seed before it could grow any further. She felt that nothing could be more than friendship between the two of them…and so she diverted to Jurina instead.
The more the realized that the more she hated herself for playing around with both of their feelings like a mere toy...even though both Jurina and Mayu are the most precious people in her life. She hated how she just realized it right now…and wondered it was too late or not. Yuki detested herself for how filthy and devious she was to people she cherished. She wasn’t able to admit back then…but she was actually happy that she broke up with Jurina…and that Mayu came to her to comfort her. She slapped herself across her face without any hesitation, and it seemed she did too hard that she got dizzy from it. After all the pain she inflicted upon herself, she was still crying in silence out of loath. For all these years, it wasn’t Jurina that was in her heart…ever since the beginning…it has always been…
“…I…Mayu I-I...”
She moved her lips but didn’t speak it out. She felt that she didn’t have the right to say those words to Mayu…she did too many horrible things to the poor Watanabe, and lost all the right to be by her side…and to even say she love her for all these years they know each other.
-
-
~TO BE CONTINUED~
Topic: AMNESIA: Chapter 14 ~ [WMatsui + MaYuki]~ (18/12/2015) (Read 115284 times)