Here is the next part. The last part will be releasing soon. Thanks!
PART II
Jurina still kept working. Everyday she still came and practiced with other members. And also went to the hospital. Since that day, Jurina, however, had not stepped in the room anymore. She just sat in a bench outside Rena’s room and hid herself in a corner which she could look in but did not let Rena know. Jurina did not want to rouse Rena’s anger. Not at all. This was prohibited especially for patients with heart problems. Rena was currently too fragile.
More doctors and experts were called. They did many exams on Rena. They had meetings. They had discussions. AKS was impatient too. There were pressures from fans, the publics and even SKE members when Rena’s absence was prolonged. Jurina tried to avoid having lunch or dinner with other members. She was afraid that she would speak out the secret or even cry. She did not know how to do. She felt totally useless.
After two weeks sleeping on the bench, Jurina was woken up at midnight. This was a nurse.
“What’s wrong?” Jurina asked, still in sleepy mode.
“The little girl has just called you to come in.” The nurse spoke softly.
Jurina, still sleepy, did not get who was “the little girl”. Who could be littler than she?
“Ah!”
Jurina suddenly realized and was totally awake. She stood up, breathed, and came in.
“I have to be as careful as possible.” Jurina told herself. She was going to face Rena and she did not want to make Rena angry again. It was midnight, but Rena seemed not to going to sleep. Rena was still in bed and rested on the big pillow. Her hand was full of sharp needles. It must be hurt, mustn’t it?
“When will you stop sleeping on the corridor?” Rena asked. Her tone was stoic. Jurina could not predict Rena’s current emotion as well as thoughts.
“I don’t know.” Jurina honestly replied. Actually she really did not know.
“Why do you do that?” Rena continued with another question. Same voice.
“I don’t know.” Jurina repeated. This time the answer was a lie. But Jurina was not sure Rena would have believed if she had told the truth that she was worried about Rena.
“Liar.” Rena said. Directly. Only a word.
Jurina kept silent. She had no idea to do next because it was true. Rena was correct. Rena she was facing now was not a usual Rena that she had known before. Rena probably did not read what in Jurina’s mind. Rena did not let Jurina be silent. Rena was now a judge, and Jurina was an indictee.
“Is it cold to sleep on the bench?”
“Yes… ah no no no. It’s not! Not at all!” Jurina honestly answered but then corrected her response immediately.
It was not a time to be honest, Jurina! Jurina thought and secretly cursed herself.
“Jurina.” Still this voice.
Jurina felt lost.
“Yes?”
Jurina responded to Rena, but felt extremely lost and scared. She did not know what Rena wanted and where the conversation was led to.
“Hug me.”
What? Jurina was extremely confused, but still followed Rena’s request. Jurina got close, was careful with all the wires and needles, and slowly hugged Rena. Jurina still did not understand what was going on until she realized her chest got wet. Rena was crying.
“Wait wait. Rena. Please don’t cry. Please!”
“I’m sorry,” said to Rena, very softly, “I’m such a selfish. I just thought of myself and what I had to suffer but never thought of you. Never thought of how you felt. You were also hurt. And I… hurt you.”
Jurina hugged Rena more tightly.
“Nope, it’s my fault, not yours. I’m sorry. Please stop crying.”
Rena nodded. Jurina held Rena’s tears and tried to stop all of them. Jurina helped Rena to lie down as gently as possible.
“Jurina.”
“Yes ma’am.”
“Just tonight, go home and sleep.”
“But I…”
“Just only one night, Jurina. I beg you.”
Jurina was convinced. She wanted to say no, but could not.
“Alright. But tonight only. I’m coming tomorrow.”
“Okay.” Rena fell in sleep with a smile. Jurina stayed for a while, did nothing, and just looked Rena slept.
Jurina did not know anything. She did not realize anything at all. Jurina knew she would remember this night no matter how many years passed. Rena was aware of her condition. It got worse. That was why she called Jurina and asked for a hug. Rena was afraid that she would not have a chance to be hugged by Jurina anymore.
“We must do something. I can’t keep her for everyone more than a month.”
The doctor said. Jurina just wanted to fall, but forced herself to stand. It was absolutely not a right time to fall. She had to be strong to be with Rena. It was a key time. She asked the doctor.
“What is “do something” Sir?”
“Her condition is so severe. It can’t helped with medications, but transplantation.”
Heart transplantation? People could live with a kidney and donated the other, but everyone only had one heart. How to find such a donor in such emergency time? Even if there had been a donor, he or she must have been carefully screened and examined to determine if his or her heart was best suited to the receiver. It was rare. Really rare. The chance for Rena was now slight. Again, Jurina felt useless. She could not do anything to save Rena. The only thing she could do now was to look Rena suffered from pains and then died. Her mind was empty. Jurina stayed in the hospital and ignored the staff. No matter how the staff begged or scolded, Jurina refused to leave the hospital. Yes, she was a professional. But she was still a human. She had her own limit. She could not smile, could not dance, and could not be like there was nothing when Rena was on the verge of death. No, she could not do that.
Another week passed. Jurina did not care about anything else. She was in the hospital and beside Rena. Until an evening when the doctor bought her a cup of coffee.
“Kid, you’re also Matsui?” He asked.
“Yes, Sir. I’m Matsui, but I’m not biologically related to Rena.”
“Umm… I see. But why don’t we try?”
“Try what Sir?”
The doctor looked at her chest for an answer. Her heart? What? Right. Why not? It may be possible. Why had not she thought about it before?
“Oh no. Forget it. I’m sorry. A donor is a volunteer. You’ve not made a request. What idiot things I’ve just said? Forgive this old man.”
“No, not idiot at all Sir. I do want a pre-evaluation.”
“You want, kid?”
“Yes, I do. And I’m volunteer.” She said. Her voice and eyes showed determination.
“Alright, so… let’s do it!”
The pre-evaluation was carried out carefully. When the result was released, Jurina understood the meaning of her last name. It was not random that hers and Rena’s were same. Things always happened and carried meanings with them. Many would understand the meanings. Many would never. But now Jurina understood. They were not only mentally but also biologically connected in some ways that could help each other. Jurina was not hesitated in a second. It was unusual. Being afraid of death was something very natural to human beings. Surprisingly, Jurina did not feel so even a little bit. Was she brave? Jurina did not think so. Simply, she loved Rena enough.
“Are you sure, kid? You’re only 16. There are a lot of great things to discover.”
“I already met the greatest thing.”
The doctor then said no word. He looked at Jurina for a while. He tried to find a hesitation. But he failed.
“Fine. Do you have any favors?”
“I want to be an unknown donor.”
“Your name won’t be revealed. Anything else?”
“That’s it. Thank you very much Sir!”
This was the first time in his career as a doctor he saw a girl who were going to die was that happy.
As Rena could not get out of her bed, Jurina spent all the times around the bed.
“Hey Jurina, you can’t abandon SKE. You have to go back to work.”
“If you want so, recover.”
“Of course. I will but you…”
“You’ve said you will,” Jurina interrupted, “Promise?”
Rena was hesitated. She knew clearly than anyone. Her chance was very slight.
“Promise?” Jurina repeated.
“… okay…”
“I know you will get well soon. And then continue stand in the stage with SKE. And then be an actress and win the Oscar!”
“Kid,” Rena laughed, “I’m not hiring you to dream for me!”
Jurina laughed too. She loved to see Rena like this. Relaxed and happy. She always wanted to see Rena like this. Yes, if she had had a chance. Jurina wanted to see Rena to be an actress. Would Rena be as excellent as Yuko? Would she win an Oscar Award? Jurina wanted to be an actress too, but she had no regret to sacrifice her dream especially for the person whom she loved most. Stop thinking about future. Jurina now just wanted to enjoy these happy moments with Rena.
Rena was very calm when the doctor explained about her condition and about the surgery. Jurina was very pleased to see that. They started talking about what to do after Rena left the hospital. They would go to an amusement park. They would have ice-cream. They would invite other members to home and cook. There were a lot of things to talk. Actually the one who talked most was Jurina. Rena only listened and smiled. Always gently. Till the last night, Jurina still behaved as usual. Jurina was proud of her acting skills. She thought she deserved for an Oscar Award.
“You’re worried?”
“I am.”
“Don’t worry. Everything will be ok. I guarantee.” Jurina said. Tightly held Rena’s hands.
“I hope so.”
Rena asked.
“Hug me one more time, ok?”
“Again?” Jurina complained but actually really loved this kind of request. Jurina warned, “Crying is not allowed.”
Rena nodded and Jurina carefully held Rena in her hands. Now Rena was thin and small. Jurina could hug Rena easily. She could not believe Rena would be get thinner.
“You’re so soft, Jurina. It’s very comfortable.”
You’re too! Jurina thought. Her heart was on the left and Rena’s was on the right. It was matched when they hugged. Their hearts touched each other’s. It was really comfortable.
“Jurina. You know you’re such an annoyed kid. Always coddle everyone.”
What? I think you’re coddling me! Jurina thought but kept it for herself.
“But I’m really happy to know you. Honestly I am.”
Jurina listened in silence.
“I have no regret. So…” Rena paused for a while and then spoke slowly and clearly, “Jurina, don’t give me your heart.”
Rena’s voice was very soft and gentle, but Jurina felt like she just listened to a gunshot.
“Rena, how can you…?”
“Kid. I don’t understand you well enough? If you want to be an actress, you still need to learn more. So, live and learn.”
Jurina was still frozen. Rena was right. She was still a kid. She thought she controlled everything, but actually Rena did. Rena knew everything.
“I’m really happy. Really.” Rena repeated.
Jurina still did not understand anything until Rena fainted in her hands. Rena disconnected herself with all supporting machines.
“No! Rena! Idiot! What are you doing? Doctor!” Jurina screamed.
(to be continued)
Topic: Matsui [WMatsui fanfic] - COMPLETED (Read 8135 times)