Hi, I have been trying to loose weight since I was 12 and I am about 19 right now. I was wondering if there were any h!p'ers that were on it or have been on it?
Also here is my story about my past and weight journey:
Hi my name is Britni and I am 19. Start weight, 188. Current Weight 180.5. Goal Weight 130. I have a pretty face, a cute shape, but it is all hidden under about 60+ pounds of fat. And I am tired of it. Please take time to read my Story Thus Far. I normally don't write, at all, I hate it-but this is important. Please have patience, I pray you will be inspired.
I was born a “delicate” child and was pretty active as most little kids were/are. My mother never had sweets in the house that was reserved for grandmas-and the ice cream man. We have moved several times (3 times in all) starting when I was 7 years old.
When we moved the first time I began home schooling with my mom, the problem was we didn’t do much schooling. Our days consisted of her sleeping with a pillow to block out the light and I would steal change off her desk and head out to the corner gas station to stock up on candy. I would sit and watch TV while stuffing the wrappers in the seats. My other personal meals would consist of sharp cheddar cooked in the microwave which created what I affectionately called “cheese pie”.
Little did I know my mother was very sick so that was the cause of her sleeping all day and little meal preparation. Before this new routine I was either too little to notice or I was at school all day so I had no idea what my mother’s routine was. I just figured this is what she always did, she was the mom right, she can do what she wants. Needless to say, this diet led to a very bloated looking 9 year old in time. I eventually got over my kleptomania persona and went into the private school system. During this time is when I first became self conscious of my appearance. I was pretty popular, I had those fun little boyfriends, but it seemed the boys I liked didn’t like me back but the girls with the smaller jean sizes. Starts so young doesn’t it…? (-__-) I had a bad run in with a few girls at my school and began to get a little depressed.
My school was right next to the town’s DQ, everyday when I would come home crying my mother would take me to DQ and get me a big blizzard. My school also had an award system that ended in coupons or trips with friends to DQ for your favorite dessert. So food began to be signaled with an award or a comfort for me. I still had a lot of friends and I could fit into my clothes, or so I thought, seems parents don’t tell you about the when you are little and you have a look of a 10-year-old knocked up girl when you wear your favorite dress. Everyone around me always ate as they pleased and during a time when I didn’t want to be more different then I already was (I was the loud girl, with a lot of surface friends but few that stuck with me) I ate as they did, and probably even more.
When I entered 6th grade it was a disaster. I was the fat, scraggy haired pokemon loving freak not to mention 6th grader. Like most kids I think I blocked out the first year of middle school, all I remember is that I sunk into a pretty hard depression. My one salvation was my best friend Lindsay, who was one of the skinniest girls I had ever met. She was rich and so much energy, an older sister and a mother who always had plenty of sweets for us to much on. I thought her life was perfect.
We moved again, this time I was about 11 or 12. I began an even smaller school and was brought back into elementary (6th grade was elementary in that state), at first I was pretty upset but as I look back on it I am so thankful for getting that last year of childhood. Now this school I went to had uniforms, and I was developing a lot faster than most girls around me-lets just say I was glad when I DID wear a bra to gym because for some reason 6th grade girls and boys become infatuated with snapping bras. Everyone wore the same clothes, and of course everyone was much smaller than me and didn’t have these two humongous flopping lumps right under their eyes, I didn’t see it as a blessing but just another sign that my body would never look like theirs. But in the sixth grade I made one of my best friends, a girl who I thought had the perfect body, another girl who had a lot of money, energy, and was beautiful. We got along great; she didn’t seem to care how my body was and always invited me to go swimming and would even try to have me borrow her swimsuits, which she had to know I would never have fit in. I would eventually borrow her older sisters and we became really close.
Over the next couple years my weight would become more and more of a problem. I ended up being home schooled again because I started to become sick and miss a lot of school-and I guess my old lifestyle was starting to sound a lot better than my current one. I partially think I mainly just hated seeing girls who were smaller than me everyday.
I eventually went back to school and tried out for the cheerleading squad. They said I had a lot of spirit-but no rhythm. *AHEM* Oh well for cheerleaders to be a spirit raising squad. But they asked me to be the mascot. They said I would still workout with the cheerleaders, and that is why I tried out in the first place to get a active lifestyle. I ended up lifting weights, and running, a lot slower than everyone else and their size XS pants while I wore a XL. I ended up loosing a lot of weight before my very eyes. I ended up getting a boyfriend, I kind of wish that didn’t happen. I figured since I had gotten a guy I didn’t need to take care of myself, “I got him already.” Heh, so I went back to the way I was before. Also during this time my doctor told me that I was “Obese”. (-__-)
We moved again, I was devastated. I was happy, a boyfriend, friends, a good church-everything. But wait-God had such a plan for me. We moved when I was 16 and I was thrown into the PUBLIC school system. This was awful at first, I was fat, loud, a Christian and with the craziest clothes style. I had pretty much just worn uniforms for the past 4 years or home schooled, I decided to become a fashion designer and experiment with everything. On my first week of a school I wore goggles on my head with a ribbon holding it down to my head, but because of this I made one of my best friends in the entire world. Another skinny girl, with a lot of energy, mid-class working family-and I LOVED HER. We shared a common interest in Japan, music, TV shows.
My love for Japan grew bigger and bigger probably fueled by my learning the language and my good friends who loved it also. I was constantly tormented by the boys around me at the school due to me being me and dealt with more depression, but my family, God and my best friend helped me get through it.
Oh yeah, my love for Japan. Anyway, I became not only in love with the culture and the language but the people. Now Japanese people are small by nature, and I wanted to get to that. So my idols were ones that are probably sizes 5 at their biggest.
In my senior year my doctor told me that I had Fibro Milaga. This is the same disease that sent my mom to bed for so many years. I was devastated, and scared. My mom was 101 when she was married, same bust as me, except my bones are a little thicker due to my dad and I am taller than her about 2”. This disease is a one that makes your body create extra toxins and attacks your joints and muscles. I was in and out of so many hospitals and probably gave enough blood to feed a child vampire for a year. I was uncertain about the quality of myself because I had to take so many medicines and see so many doctors and no one knew exactly what was wrong. I was scared. But when they finally told me what it was, my fear was realized, I was turning into my mom. Now I love my mom, but her body pains are not anything anyone would ever want. It is a new disease and there is no cure, only medicine-a lot of medicine. I already have ADHD and the thought of taking more medicine hurt me so much-I couldn’t do any of it on my own-I wasn’t good enough, or so I thought. My weight had gotten to about 191, the biggest I had ever been and I was miserable. My body hurt, I was depressed, stressed, scared and confused. During this year man things happened, my brothers both got married, my high school career was coming to a close and felt I had lost my best friend to her boyfriend. I was lonely and hurting. My body hurt to much to go to school, let alone church. And this Church I was going to, I guess coming in at such a late year I didn’t feel happy there-the youth pastor kept changing and I dunno-it was hard for everyone.
I worked really hard on loosing about 10 pounds, because during the summer I had a 3 month trip planned in Japan. A land where they eat about 1/3 of what we do all day, you have to walk everywhere, and if I wanted to buy ANY clothes I needed to be smaller. I graduated at about 180lbs, and I was quite proud-but not satisfied. Two days before I was scheduled to leave the country for the first time and be away the longest time away from home, I got sick. Some kind of stomach virus, up to about five hours before I went on the plane I was throwing up and other things-I was in so much pain and I was exhausted. I was so afraid I would not get to go on my dream trip, but God healed me and let me loose about another 8lbs, even though it wasn’t a good way to loose them. So I went off to Japan 172lbs. I cried almost the whole 13 hours there because I was so happy with what was finally happening, my dream was coming true, I was going to Japan.
During the trip the first two weeks was with friends, we ate A LOT, lots of new foods to try and I didn’t hold back. I ended up probably about 175 after the first two weeks, we walked a lot. Everyone went back home and I stayed behind. I had an awesome time, lost about five pounds, learned a lot of Japanese and was so happy.
I went home, needless to say everything was crazy, College was starting. I started going to the local Community College and my brothers were moving in around us, one set with a baby. We were pressed for time and money. I went back to my old routine of two times a day at the local Wendy’s, Arby’s or Taco Bell. YAY! FAT AGAIN! (O.o) bigger portions, no walking and no motivation. I actually did do training with my sister for a while and went down to about 170, but then the things began to happen.
My new home stay sister from Japan was with us, and there were so many American foods WE HAD TO TRY-and she eats like an American and so I didn’t hold back. We both got pretty fat, and mad at ourselves. My big pitfall was when we took a road trip down to Texas for thanksgiving with my family. The Thanksgiving time was not the problem, but the car ride. We ate and slept nonstop, bad food. We got even fatter, but we were having fun so we didn’t worry.
I was involved in my Church’s pageant, in fact I was one of the main parts and in a biblical costume, which I was so afraid was going to make me look like a balloon-but I made it work. Yay for big sashes! That holiday time was INSANE. Family was in out all month long, and of course we ate like a good ol’ Italian family would, over eating. I probably went to about 195 during that time, but I rarely checked the scale. I didn’t care. Me and my home stay sister probably got even fatter. That New Years Eve we both decided to not go keep this lifestyle up. So now we are kind of in a competition on who can get back to our wanted weight. By that time I was 188 lbs.
It was that New Years Eve that I remembered Jenny Craig. My friends had always laughed at even the name, big ol’ fat people trying to loose weight but never actually getting there, calling help lines and crying on the phone. Well, that sounded like the way to go for me. Heh, except I am 19 now and I know the reality of the possibility of me loosing weight. I approached my parents and told them what I wanted to do, and they said they would support me through this if I would stick with it.
January 24th 2007 I visited my local (way over in the next three towns over) Jenny Craig clinic, and signed up. I have lost already 6lbs in my first week, which includes working out as much as I can with about 30 to 45 intervals. My goal weight is 130. My inspiration is being able to be that singer and beautiful girl that I want to be in Japan, to meet my future husband, to have energy to be a college student, and be able to wear anything I want.
Even though I am only 19, I will not let myself slip into the need to loose 200 lbs thread. I am going to take a hold of the bull by the horns while I still have a little upper body strength left. For the next part of my life I will…
…no longer going to be that girl who is the fat one.
…no longer going to hurt.
…no longer going to be the girl who takes forever in the dressing room because she is crying at even the sight of her own body, let alone how the clothes don’t even come close to looking good on her.
I am…
…going to be new.
…going to be healthy.
…going to be the way God intended me.
…going to be happy with myself, and my accomplishments
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This was cross-posted on the
jenny craig message board hereRight now it is March 14, 2007 and on my 7th week in jenny craig. With the help of my Hello! Project girls and their music when I work out, their pictures to keep me motivated, and my good food choices I am now at 172.8 ^____^ 5 more pounds to go till I hit the 20 mark and am 1/3 there.
Topic: Has anyone ever done Jenny Craig or on it now? (Read 3229 times)