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Author Topic: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki, TanaKame] Update - Chapter 16 (5/30)  (Read 23685 times)

Offline kuro808

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 4
« Reply #20 on: November 16, 2010, 08:14:42 PM »
Gaki seems to be apologetic about her current situation, but I guess her love is better than the strong friendship, I guess Sayu is justing taking her side because no one else was seemingly around, I guess but I think Risa should try again and Eri might give Ai a push to that direction too
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Offline fallenxangel24952

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 4
« Reply #21 on: November 16, 2010, 09:42:41 PM »
^
same opinion :)
hope KameShige could help TakaGaki :twothumbs

Offline kano-chan

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 4
« Reply #22 on: November 17, 2010, 01:47:55 AM »
Agh...! Something tells me that Kei is cheating on Gaki... ;) She didn't even love Ai-chan yet, it seems... :(

Offline SarangAi

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 4
« Reply #23 on: November 17, 2010, 04:18:00 AM »
aahhh!  Things are warming up now.  Kei is fishy and Risa's is worried and Ai is depressed... things will happen soon!  :twothumbs

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Offline oddball

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 4
« Reply #24 on: November 17, 2010, 01:02:16 PM »
Hmm, Gaki's boyfriend Kei dosn't seem like the bastard Ai has mad him out to be in the first part of this chapter, but then he's also been acting strange, could he already be cheating on Gaki?

Sayu seems like a great friend for Gaki and comforts her well when Gaki is upset about Ai, Poor Gaki dosn't have a clue why Ai is angry at her and desperatly wants to find out why.

So it actually was Gaki in Ai's bedroom, blimey is that conversation going to be awkward or what?  :panic:

Offline XcuteX26262X

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 4
« Reply #25 on: November 17, 2010, 04:58:39 PM »
@kurosawa87, fallenxangel24952, kano-chan, SarangAi, oddball: Thank you for your replies. You guys make me happy!  :D
------------------------------------------------

Warning: Strong language.

Chapter 5

Eri's POV


“Um, can…I know…your name?”
“I’m Ai, Takahashi Ai.”


Takahashi Ai. That’s her name. The girl that I’ve been thinking about ever since that day. She’s so beautiful, amazing, cute, hot, attractive, sexy, has a nice butt that I couldn’t stop starring at…okay ignore the last part. What? Don’t tell me that you wouldn’t do the same thing! Okay, I’m going to stop now, because this is just too awkward. I’m usually not perverted, but I can’t help it. She’s so…I can’t describe it! I want to see her again, but how am I supposed to do that? Damn! I should’ve taken her number, but that probably would’ve scared her. I’m pretty sure she was already scared, judging from the way she screamed when I opened my mouth to answer her question; “What a beautiful man scream…” I giggled to myself remembering what I had told her. What a beautiful man scream…and something about fuck being a bad word.

Takahashi Ai, don’t worry. I’ll erase all your pain. I’ll make you forget about the person who’s been hurting you so bad. I’ll make you smile again, just wait for me. You and I will be together forever, no matter what. You’ll be mine, and I’ll be yours. I’m going to make whoever that person is regret what they have been doing to you. I’ll make sure that they will be sorry for hurting you. That’s a promise, and when I make a promise, I don’t break it.

[Flash back]
“Hey! Get away from her!” I said anger boiling inside of me. I’ve seen enough of this!
The two guys looked at me and one of them replied; “mind your own business. She wants this, and we want to give her what she wants. Now go bring us some more alcohol, and be the good little slut you are.” Slut?! Did he just call me a slut? That’s it! I was about the punch that disgusting human being in the face so hard, then cut his fingers off and feed them to his friend! “What? You look mad. Did I say something wrong? Or maybe you want to join us…you see, I have no problem with foursomes...” That was it, I couldn’t hold my anger any longer, I kicked him as hard as I could in his crotch. He fell to the ground screaming in pain.
“YOU BITCH!” his friend tried to throw a punch at me but failed, I pushed him, witch made him fall to the ground next to his friend who was still holding his crotch area. I took that chance to grab the girl’s hand and run with her out of the bar. I heard the manager yelling at me; “ERI!!” but I could care less about that horny bastard. I had to get her out of there.
-
We’ve reached my place quickly, and she’s been sleeping ever since. She slept peacefully, and I couldn’t help but stare at her. “She’s beautiful…” I said loud without realizing it, and then covered my mouth fearing that she might have heard me. “Risa…” I froze. “Risa, why are you doing this to me?” I started freaking out. What the hell is going on? “Don’t you know how much I love you?” she’s dreaming… “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?” tears started running down her face uncontrollably, I wanted to do something, but my body was telling me otherwise… I just listened. “WHY ARE SO BLIND? RISA I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU! WHY CAN’T YOU SEE THAT?” I felt so bad for her; she must be in so much pain. “WHY DID YOU CHOOSE HIM OVER ME? WHAT DOES HE HAVE THAT I DON’T?” the tears that I’ve been holding back were no longer contained. I walked closer to her, and gave her a tight warm embrace. She retuned it, and started sobbing in my arms. I tried to calm her down, but she kept crying, her hot tears soaking through the jacket I was wearing. The girl and I cried in each other’s arms. Her tears of sorrow, and my tears of sadness.
[End of flash back]


That night, I’ve vowed that I will do everything, and anything in my power to take all her pain away, and make her happy again, even if that means hurting the person she’s madly in love with. The person who’s been making her cry herself to sleep every night. The person who’s slowly killing her…
Risa-san, you will be sorry.

To be continued…
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Offline kano-chan

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 5
« Reply #26 on: November 18, 2010, 01:37:14 AM »
Cool! TakaKame! :w00t: Eri cares so much for Ai-chan and even felt for her... :wub: They just met too. :roll:

Soo..Eri is pretty much madly in love with Ai-chan and it's going to break her heart when (if) TakaGaki comes together... :mon scare: Is there going to be a little TakaKame here? :mon misch: Since Ai-chan thought Eri was cute too! hehe...

And it doesn't seem that Gaki loves Ai-chan because if she did, she wouldn't feel comfortable making out with her boyfriend in front of Ai-chan! Is she just going for Ai-chan later because her boyfriend might be doing something behind her back? :panic:

hehe, sorry, I'm getting ideas... The best thing is to wait and see... :P2


Offline SarangAi

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 5
« Reply #27 on: November 18, 2010, 03:39:02 AM »
oohh TakaKame!  You dont' see too many of those  XD

Eri seems really taken by Aichan... i can't wait to see what she's gonna do to Risa and how aichan will respond  :twothumbs

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Offline kuro808

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 5
« Reply #28 on: November 18, 2010, 07:14:12 AM »
hmm Eri is gonna be the one to face Risa but I wonder what Sayu is gonna do
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Offline oddball

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 4
« Reply #29 on: November 18, 2010, 12:18:17 PM »
Takahashi Ai. That’s her name. The girl that I’ve been thinking about ever since that day. She’s so beautiful, amazing, cute, hot, attractive, sexy, has a nice butt that I couldn’t stop starring at…okay ignore the last part. What? Don’t tell me that you wouldn’t do the same thing!

 :lol: nice afterthough about Ai's butt!

It was quite sweet and all how Eri has properly fallen for Ai, however I was worried about how Eri was going to make who ever made Ai upset (Gaki) regret what they have been doing to Ai, promosing that it will take Ai's pain away even if it means hurting Gaki!

The part at the end about 'Gaki you willl be sorry' was a bit fraky too  :panic:

Offline fallenxangel24952

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 5
« Reply #30 on: November 18, 2010, 04:36:26 PM »
Quote
She’s so beautiful, amazing, cute, hot, attractive, sexy, has a nice butt that I couldn’t stop starring at…okay ignore the last part.
how can we ignore THATs part :P

Quote
“What a beautiful man scream…” I giggled to myself remembering what I had told her. What a beautiful man scream…and something about fuck being a bad word.
It's really one of the best! ....at least for a girl XD

Quote
Takahashi Ai, don’t worry. I’ll erase all your pain. I’ll make you forget about the person who’s been hurting you so bad. I’ll make you smile again, just wait for me. You and I will be together forever, no matter what. You’ll be mine, and I’ll be yours.
somehow it sound like a psycho would say :shocked

Quote
“Hey! Get away from her!” I said anger boiling inside of me. I’ve seen enough of this!
.
.
.
I kicked him as hard as I could in his crotch. He fell to the ground screaming in pain.
I pushed him, witch made him fall to the ground next to his friend who was still holding his crotch area. I took that chance to grab the girl’s hand and run with her out of the bar
eri for the rescue :pimp:

Quote
The person who’s slowly killing her…Risa-san, you will be sorry.
what yould eri do? :?

----------------------
p.s.:like ur fic more and more

Offline XcuteX26262X

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 5
« Reply #31 on: November 21, 2010, 04:26:44 PM »
@kano-chan: Thanks for waiting.  :)

@SarangAi: Let's just say, Ai won't be happy...  :twisted:

@kurosawa87: You'll have to wait and see.  :)

@oddball: I'm glad you liked the part about Ai's butt.  XD

@fallenxangel24952: Thank you.  :heart:
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Chapter 6

Ai's POV

“Come on Ai-chan!!!” “No, leave me alone!!!” She’s been following me around ever since she decided to stay at my place for the night…Uninvited! What did she do this time? I just hope the police aren’t involved. Every time she gets in trouble, I’m the one to get blamed with her. “If I go down, you’re going down with me.” She told me that when she first lost her temper and hit that police officer in the face. Poor guy had a broken nose for 3 months. Guess what she said when they took her to the police station? “He’s was trying to touch my friend!” And guess who she meant by ‘my friend’? Yes, me! We spent that whole day in the police station being questioned about the insult Reina had committed. I love her, but sometimes she makes me want to get a restraining order against her.

“Are you going to tell me? Or am I going to have to force the words out of you?” she gave me one of her famous Yankee glares. That glare can burn holes through your body. Holes I tell you, holes!
I gulped as I ran to the nearest door which  happened to be the bathroom’s. “Come on dude! You can tell me anything. I’m not gonna judge you!” She stood behind the door whining. She’s actually cute when she does that. “Reina, please leave me alone.” I felt myself about to cry, why can’t people just mind their own business and leave me the alone?
“Fine.” I heard her mumbling something else and then walking away. I was relieved. Finally she won’t bother me again. I turned the door knob, but it wouldn’t open. I tried it again, this time it did open, but I landed on the floor with Reina on top of me. “OUTCH!” I tried opening my eyes, but my throbbing head didn’t help. “WHY DID YOU DO THAT FOR?” I was pissed! What a cheap move to pull. “You didn’t think I was gonna give up that easily, right?” She was right. But I’d rather die than admit it. “Would you please get off of me?” “Nope.” Hardheaded wonky eyed…I can’t curse her; I love too much to do that. Reina why did you have to be my best friend?

Every thing happened so fast that I didn’t even notice the weird position we were in. Reina was sitting on top of me with her legs around my waist, and her hands on my shoulders. My face started heating up, “please don’t see me. I don’t want you to see me like this.” She must’ve noticed, because she leaned in closer and started smirking. “Ai-chan, are you blushing?” “Blushing? Why would I be blushing?” I opened my mouth, but no words came out. “Someone please save me! Anyone, please!” as If god was listening to me, I heard the apartment’s door knob slowly turning and the door open. “Yes! Yes! Thank you god!” we both heard steps coming from the living room, as we waited to see who they belonged to. “Hey JunJu_” I froze. She was the last person I wanted to see. Of all people, why her? She looked at us in shock, tears started to build up beneath her eyes…Wait, what?

She wiped the tears away, and before I could say anything she ran. “R-Risa!” I pushed Reina off me and started running after her. She was about to slam the door behind her, but luckily I stopped her. “Risa?” she didn’t look at me, she was facing the door still crying. “Risa?” I called her name again, she wouldn’t turn to me. Seeing her like that made my heart ache.
I tried to put my arms around her and give her a hug, but she shook them off. “Don’t touch me!” she said between sobs. “What have I done to deserve all of this huh? Everyone I care about ends up breaking my heart. Why?” I was confused. I didn’t know what she was talking about. “You know? I caught Kei in bed with Sayu last night…” I felt like I got hit by a truck. “Risa, I’m sor_”  “I hate you!” My heart sank when I heard her saying those three words. “I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!” she faced me as she started to punch my arms, tears rolling from her face.  I didn’t know what to do, I wanted to stop her, but I couldn’t. Somehow I deserved it. Without warning she captured my lips with hers. My eyes widened and I could hear my heart beating fast. Her lips were soft …“What the hell is going on?” my brain wasn’t able to process what was happening, I tried to push her away but my whole body seemed frozen in place. She pushed me to the nearest wall, and started kissing me again, but this time with more passion. She left me up and before I knew it, my legs were wrapped around her waist and my hands around her neck as I kissed her back. She started caressing my thigh and as her tongue made its way into my mouth, I let out a soft moan. After realizing what I was doing, I pushed her as hard as I could. “WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?”

To be continued…
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Offline kano-chan

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 6
« Reply #32 on: November 22, 2010, 12:10:36 AM »
Whoa! What happened? :shocked

The most unexpected thing in the chapter to me was...that SAYU SLEPT WITH KEI! :stunned: :on spit: whawhaa~t?

Is this flashback or present? (sorry, might have been a liiittle bit confused there) Cuz' if Gaki found Kei sleeping with Sayu, then why did she choose him over Ai-chan? And if that was the past, why did she find him sleeping with Sayu? Shouldn't they be broken apart already? (am I missing something? sorry, maybe it's my mistake..) :huhuh

And whoo! Some TakaGaki action!---> :mon kissy: So Gaki was in love with Ai-chan that's why she got all hurt and everything. :mon determined:

I like how the chapter went! :twothumbs





Offline kuro808

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 6
« Reply #33 on: November 22, 2010, 02:16:02 AM »
I guess Sayu is going to be the wrench but I guess the ReinAi moment didn't help the situation, oh well working toward climax  :nervous
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Offline fallenxangel24952

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 5
« Reply #34 on: November 22, 2010, 06:13:14 AM »
Quote
Reina was sitting on top of me with her legs around my waist, and her hands on my shoulders. My face started heating up, “please don’t see me. I don’t want you to see me like this.” She must’ve noticed, because she leaned in closer and started smirking. “Ai-chan, are you blushing?” “Blushing? Why would I be blushing?” I opened my mouth, but no words came out.
A little ReinAi moment :wub:

Quote
“Hey JunJu_” I froze. She was the last person I wanted to see. Of all people, why her? She looked at us in shock, tears started to build up beneath her eyes…Wait, what?
Could it be...

Quote
She wiped the tears away, and before I could say anything she ran. “R-Risa!” I pushed Reina off me and started running after her. She was about to slam the door behind her, but luckily I stopped her. “Risa?” she didn’t look at me, she was facing the door still crying. “Risa?” I called her name again, she wouldn’t turn to me. Seeing her like that made my heart ache.
...yeah it is. And sh*t at the timing :cry:


Quote
“You know? I caught Kei in bed with Sayu last night…”
:shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked


Quote
I felt like I got hit by a truck. “Risa, I’m sor_”  “I hate you!” My heart sank when I heard her saying those three words. “I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!” she faced me as she started to punch my arms, tears rolling from her face.

ouch! that hurts :cry:


Quote
Without warning she captured my lips with hers. My eyes widened and I could hear my heart beating fast. Her lips were soft …“What the hell is going on?” my brain wasn’t able to process what was happening, I tried to push her away but my whole body seemed frozen in place. She pushed me to the nearest wall, and started kissing me again, but this time with more passion. She left me up and before I knew it, my legs were wrapped around her waist and my hands around her neck as I kissed her back. She started caressing my thigh and as her tongue made its way into my mouth, I let out a soft moan.
TakaGaki :wub: :inlove: :wub: :inlove:

Quote
After realizing what I was doing, I pushed her as hard as I could. “WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?”
yeah after a hot/passion kiss :P

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nice can't wait for the nxt chap :twothumbs :twothumbs :twothumbs

Offline oddball

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 6
« Reply #35 on: November 22, 2010, 05:08:04 PM »
Man, so Kei cheated on Gaki with Sayu!!!

I duuno though, Gaki and Ai getting on was all  :drool: and stuff but was it because Gaki was upset about Kei and is making out with Ai because of Kei rather than the fact that she loves Ai? is this when they get in a relationship, not based on their love but because of a break-up, if that is the cse it can only mean bad times ahead.....

Reina seems a very, um, touchy friend dosn't she?

Offline XcuteX26262X

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 6
« Reply #36 on: November 29, 2010, 06:26:02 PM »
I'M BACK~ Sorry guys, I haven't been able to update because I was busy with school and stuff. Please don't be mad at me :mon pray2:

@kano-chan: It's still in the past.  :)

@kurosawa87: Yep, the ReinAi moment didn't help...  :twisted:

@fallenxangel24952: Thanks.  :)

@oddball: Yes, she does...

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Chapter 7

Reina’s POV

“Okay…that was awkward.” I said to myself as I walked back to my apartment. Today was not my day. First; my mom has called to tell me that she’s on her way to Tokyo. Now she calls? Huh! I wonder what she wants from me this time. Second; the person that I’ve been avoiding for the longest time is in town. Third; I found out that Sayu slept with Gaki-san’s boyfriend. By the way, she and I are going to have a little chat... And fourth; I’ve witnessed my two friends making out. My two GIRL friends making out! I mean, I have no problem with girls love, but that’s something that I’m not into. Oh well, to each their own.

Risa’s POV

“WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?”
What was I thinking? Why did I kiss her? Oh my god! Now, I’m starting to freak out! Calm down Risa, calm down. Just tell her that you were upset and you weren’t thinking and it just happened.
“Answer me!” answer you? But I don’t know how, that’s why when I opened my mouth no words came out. “Risa, why…Why…Why did you kiss me?” what have I gotten myself into? “Ai…I’m so-sorry…” that’s all I was able to say. “Why did you kiss me Gaki-san?” my gaze my focused on the floor, I couldn’t look at her, I was too embarrassed, I was too ashamed. I’ve made a bold move, and now I have to think of an excuse of why I did it. I saw her shadow getting closer as she lifted my head and looked into my eyes. “Risa, tell me the truth, I have to know…No, I need to know.” The truth? I have yet to figure it out.

I have to get out of here, I can’t do this. I’m sorry, but I have to go. My legs were moving on their own, and as I was about to open the door, two hands pinned me against the wall. “You think you can just come here, kiss me and then run away?!” she said, eyes brimming with tears, and a voice filled with sadness and anger.

“What is wrong with you?” No answer. “Why are you doing this to me?” No answer. “Why did you kiss me?” No answer. I saw her raising her hand, and as I was preparing myself for the slap… nothing happened. She didn’t slap me. Next thing I know, she was on the floor sobbing and begging me to answer her questions as I watched her.

“Please tell me! Please tell me! I need to know! Please!” I just stood there, my body was frozen. I wanted to kneel down and give her a hug, I wanted to stop her cries but I couldn’t. Then, I did the most unexpected thing…I walked out on her, and left her there crying her soul out. I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I know I’m going to regret this for the rest of my life. I know she hates me now and I know that she’s probably never want to see me again, and I deserve it, I deserve every single thing that’s going to happen. I’ve made a huge mistake, and now I have to deal with the consequence. I’m a monster, and I deserve everything bad that’s coming my way.

To be continued…

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It's shorter than my previous chapters. :mon sweat: I'm sorry, but I promise the next chap is going to be longer.

Offline SarangAi

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 7
« Reply #37 on: November 29, 2010, 07:51:54 PM »
OMGGGGG don't cry Aichan!!!!!  :pleeease:

First, I just thought Aichan was angry.  But then, she just broke down...
I guess the question of whether Risa liked her or not was gnawing at her soul deep inside :fever:

but Gakisan shouldn't have walked out; that's a big no-no!  :angry1: :on thumbb:

hopefully, she'll come back and be accept aichan back~  :prayers: :hee:

avii&sig by the wonderful kawaii beam~!

Offline kuro808

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 7
« Reply #38 on: November 29, 2010, 11:07:05 PM »
Risa seems to be regretful but I guess with the cheating boyfriend, she has to do something with AI, unfortunately I hate Risa for leaving her and I hope she could explain
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Offline kano-chan

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Re: I Don't Want You Back [TakaGaki] Update - Chapter 7
« Reply #39 on: November 30, 2010, 12:34:21 AM »
Oh no! She walked out on Ai-chan! :mon ref: Don't cry, oh, poor Ai-chan! :cry:

Well, I can't blame Ai-chan for being so harsh with Gaki... cuz' that was pretty messed up. :mon unsure:

It does sound like Gaki didn't really love Ai-chan back then.. :mon huh2:

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