Meteor Shower - COMPLETED

[Nyanoha]

Sometime Around Midnight

And it starts sometime around midnight

It’s been a week since I last saw you. That long, can you believe it? Usually I would be in withdrawal, needing to see you. But… I just can’t see you right now. If I see you now, I’m sure to break down. I should be happy for you, no? I should give you all the support possible. I’m your best friend; aren’t best friends supposed to support each other?

Though, I wonder, do you even think of me as a best friend anymore? Do you even understand the emotions I’m going through right now just thinking about you? So many questions go through my head just wondering where you are and what you are doing. I know you more than you know yourself, yet why… why did you have to pick someone else?

I grip the unopened bottle of water in my hand so tightly that it crackles under the pressure. Looks from my friends are received, but they are not given back. I ignore each and every one of them. Pity is not what I wish to see right now. I sigh.

This isn’t like me. I thought to myself. They can help me, right? They at least understand me. Am I so helpless that I can’t even ask for help when it is needed?  Maybe… this is why you didn’t choose me…

Atsuko…

Or at least that’s when you lose yourself for a minute or two

My thoughts flash to you, losing myself in the memories of when I was happier. I remember the first day I met you, how your smile immediately brightened my mood. I remember when you first called my name, how my heart fluttered. Everything simple thing you did brought joy to me. It wasn’t until a couple months after that I knew that I was in love with you. That love didn’t change for five years.

I didn’t mind keeping those feelings to myself. I mean, there were times where I would cry myself to sleep, wondering if I would ever have the courage to confess them to you, wondering if I would receive love like I do to you.  But I never gave them up; I knew one day I would get strong enough to tell you.

I just wish I got stronger enough in time.

As you stand under the bar lights
And the band plays some song about forgetting yourself for a while

Voices cheering in the distance brought me back into reality. My head turned towards the sound, curious to see who it was. It was a private party, only a select few were allowed in the club. Well, a select few AKB members were at this party. The bottle I was holding slipped out of my hand as I saw the person at fault. I quickly went to grab it but it was too late; it landed on the wood floor with a loud thud.  Of all the selected AKB members invited to this party, why was she one of them?

Her head scanned the area at the sound. Her eyes landed on me. I stiffened as she smiled brightly at me. My body slightly shook as I saw her wave. Could she see my face turning pink? I waved slightly and turned my body away from her. I put my hands on my lap and took a deep breath. 

I felt a hand touch my shoulder.

And the pianos, this melancholy’s sound check, to her smile
And that white dress she’s wearing you haven’t you seen her for a while

I jumped, surprised at the motion. My head turned towards the owner of the hand.  Oshima Yuko looked at me, her face full of concern.

“Takamina, is something wrong?” she asked me. I simply shook my head, taking her hand off my shoulder. She already knows what the matter is; I can see it in her eyes.

“I’m fine, don’t worry about it.” I mustered up a small smile for her. She didn’t look convinced. I sighed softly. “Look, I just need time to myself, alright?” She gave me a good stare before nodding. She took Haruna’s hand, who was sitting next to her trying to hide the fact that she was listening in, and got up from her seat, saying that she wanted to dance. I watched them make their way to the dance floor, jealousy making its way to my heart.

But you know that she’s watching
She’s laughing, she’s turning, she’s holding her tonic like a cross

I can feel eyes on my back and without looking, I knew who the perpetrator was. I felt electricity coursing through my body from just thinking about my eyes meeting hers. My hand gripped the table for support and I tried to focus on anything besides the person behind me.

My ears locked onto the music playing in the background and my eyes on the people on the dance floor. Florescent lights flickered back and forth between the crowd, blinding the unfortunate ones who looked up at the right moment. I ignored the voices of all of them though, just watching each motion they made. The beat of the music took rhythm with my heart, pounding itself in my chest. If only it was the pounding that injured my heart.

The music died down and so did the people as the end of the song neared. I watched as people slowly dispersed in their own separate direction, mostly headed with their lovers into a dark area in the club. With the music and cheering of dancers gone, my ears pricked up at a beautiful laugh. My stomach knotted up as I heard her talking.

And then it was gone.

New music blasted loudly around the club, causing new cheers as people recognized the song. My mind told me to be happy at my savior, but my heart was pinging with pain. I never got enough of hearing her speak. I could feel my heart squeeze as I contemplated on turning around to see her. Then, my heart paced itself again as it came to a decision.

I turned around.

The room’s suddenly spinning; she walks up and asks how you are
So you can smell her perfume, you can see her lying naked in your arms

My eyes widened, my breath taken from me, as I saw her looking at me. It was too late for me to turn away; my eyes already were captivated with hers. She turned back slowly to the person she was talking to, said something and turned to me. She started to make her way towards me. I gripped my left arm, digging my nails into skin. The pain slightly calmed me.

When she got just a foot away from me, she stopped.  She took me in, trailing her gaze from my feet to my head. I could feel my cheeks tint. She then gave me a beautiful smile and took that one step towards me, engulfing me in her arms. It was as if time stopped for me, then only thing I could decipher were the warm arms of the person I loved wrapped around me.

My mind flashed to memories of this act I loved so much, when it was only I she would hug so dearly.  I remembered looking up at her as she told me she loved me, even though I knew she was only referring to friendship.  The way we would sit together, her arm around my shoulders as I snuggled against her. I would remember as we would talk for hours in the same position, never getting uncomfortable. The secrets we shared. The secret I wished to share. All of it. Even her telling me that she met someone else.  And just like that…

The warmth is gone.

And so there is a change in your emotions
And all these memories come rushing like fear of waves to your mind

I grabbed onto the warmth though, desperate for it. I pulled her back towards me, surprising her.  I buried my face into the crook of her neck. The only place I felt like I belonged was in her arms.

“Don’t…” I whispered. “Just a little longer, please…” Her only reply was to pull me closer. She sat down, pulling me down with her. She wrapped her arm around my shoulders and for the first time in a week, I felt myself in a familiar position. It took all my strength not to break down in tears.

How I longed to be in her arms again, to hear her voice, to smell her scent. I felt like I could stay like that forever. I knew that was impossible however; she was already taken. Fear took my insides, making me scoot closer to her. I didn’t want her to leave, to leave me. I wanted her to be mine, not his. If she leaves now, she’ll just make her way to him, not me. I can’t let her go.

I closed my eyes and took in her smell, instantly calming me down. I felt strong with her in hands reach. Without even debating if I should do it, I leaned up and pressed my lips to hers. I felt her body stiffen against mine but I leaned closer, oblivious to what it was doing to her. Somewhere in the back of my head, common sense was found. I was about to pull away and apologize, when…

Her hands wrapped around my neck and pulled me closer. 

Of the curl of your bodies like two perfect circles in twined
And you feel hopeless and homeless and lost in the haze of the whine

That sense in the back of my hand instantly disappeared and I found myself kissing her again. Her lips parted slightly and I found my tongue slipping its way in the small crack, as if freedom was on the other side. My tongue roamed her mouth, making her moan in a way that made me want more. Two things I found out that night: One, she was an amazing kisser. And two, her moans were intoxicating. I wanted to find out what else she can do that made electricity flow into my stomach.

I was the one that broke the ever longing kiss. We were both panting hard, both blushing like crazy. I leaned in for a second, licking the remainder of saliva from the corner of her mouth.  She placed her forehead against mine and for a while, we just stayed like that, watching the others’ chest rise and fall. I opened my eyes to find that she was staring at me. The look she was giving me was both confused and adoring. For some reason, it gave me enough strength.

I blurted it out.

“I love you.”

Her eyes widened and she opened her mouth, but nothing came out. I said it again, and again, until she was shaking. I saw tears in her eyes but none spilled over. I was getting confused at why she wasn’t saying anything. My stomach clenched, thinking that she might refuse my love. Rejection soon followed. I got up from her lap and she shook her head, still saying nothing. She opened her mouth again but I covered my ears, refusing to hear what she was going to say, afraid to do so.

Tears overflowed my cheek and I let them, afraid to uncover my ears. She got up and was about to take a step forward, when something behind me caught her attention. Still shaky, I turned around, curious as to why she was looking so shocked. Everything around me froze as I saw someone standing near the bar, looking around for someone.  My arms fell limply to the side. His eyes landed on someone behind me.

I lost.

And she leaves with someone you don’t know
But she makes sure you saw her, she looks right at you and bolts

He started walking towards her, not even looking in my direction. When he passed me, I grabbed his hand, stopping him. He looked at me and for a second, a look of surprise flashes on his face. As if he didn’t even see me. He took me in then and realization replaces the surprise.

“You must be Minami-chan?” He said it as more of a fact, nodding to himself. My stomach heaved at the name. My blood boiled; I didn’t like him calling me that. He nodded at me again then pulled his hand away. His shoulder pushed passed me and he hugged Atsuko, lifting her off the floor slightly. I couldn’t help but notice that he was tall, a least a foot taller than Atsuko.

Once he was done hugging her, he took her hand and said something about having dinner. Atsuko then looked at me. A tear falls down my cheek as I already know her answer. I try to open my mouth to say something but nothing comes out, I just stare at her sadly as more tears spill. Why is it that the only thing that goes through my head at that moment is how pathetic I must look?

I watched as he dragged her farther away from me, father away from us. She doesn’t even say anything to me; she just looks at me sadly and walks with him into the night. She was gone.

And so was my heart.

As she walks out the door your blood boiling, your stomach engrossed
And when your friends say, “What is it, you look like you seen a ghost?”

I collapsed onto the floor, my legs no longer able to hold me. I wrapped my arms around my knees and sobbed out. I felt arms wrap around me and I knew they weren’t hers; they had no warmth to them. I looked up to see who was supporting me and was shocked as I saw more than one behind her. It seemed like a lot of people saw my actions towards her, and everything beyond that. I truly had great friends. It made me sob out more.

Sayaka rubbed my back, trying to calm me. I could hear many others trying to soothe me with words. Though it was appreciated, none of it worked. Someone crouched next to me and I looked to see who it was. Kojima Haruna looked at me with a weary smile. She opened her arms and I immediately leaned into them. She wrapped her arms around me and rubbed my back.

“Tell me, what will you do now?” She asked me softly. I looked up at her, wiping my tears away.

“What do you mean? I can’t do anything anymore… She has already decided!” I cringed back at my own outburst.  “Sorry… I just, don’t know what to do.”

“Why don’t you do what your heart wants you to do?” I blinked. I did that didn’t I? I told her how I felt, right? She rejected it though. She chose him. Not me. My mind told me to just forget about her but my heart, my heart told me I shouldn’t give up.

I stumbled up, wiping any remainders of tears away. I looked around me, at all the people who were supporting me. “Everyone… thank you.” Without thinking I spun on my heels and ran out the door, into the cold night.  I didn’t know where I was going.

All I knew was that I was following my heart.

Then you walk under the street lights
And you’re too drunk to notice that everyone is staring at you

I pushed past the groups of people on the streets, ignoring all the complaints. It was going to be hard to find her with so many people outside at this time but I didn’t care, I just let my feet take me. I was panting as I neared a corner towards the park. Small puffs of vapor formed in front of my face as I breathed out. As I was looking at every face that I passed, I noticed that they were staring at me. 

How long have I been calling out her name?

You just don’t care what you look like, the world is falling around you

Am I loud enough that you can hear me, Atsuko? Can you feel my pain right now? My voice seemed to get only louder.  I started to walk around in the park, looking desperately for her. I ignored the pain in my legs from running too much, the way my voice cracked as I screamed out her name. I could not lose my voice now.

No pain can stop me now.

I made my way to the back of the park, where there were tables and benches that looked over at the large fountain. I also knew that there were a bunch of food benders that sold food near the fountain. If they wanted to get something quick, they would go over there.  As I neared the back of the park, I stopped to catch my breath. I could see the fountain in the distance; it gave me the strength to walk on.

 I looked around at all the tables and benches, trying to spot her. My stomach flipped as I neared the end of the tables and didn’t see her at any of them.  Just as I was about to lose hope, I saw her.  She was sitting next to him, his arm wrapped around her shoulder. I didn’t like the way he touched her, like she was his prized possession.

I took a step toward them and called out her name. They both looked up at me. Atsuko’s eyes widened and she looked over at him. Rage filled me but I kept it at bay. She looked back at me with pleading eyes. When she opened her mouth to say something, I held my hand up to stop her. I had to talk first, or else I’d lose all courage I had in me.

I opened my mouth and told her how I felt.

You just have to see her…

“Atsuko, I miss you.” My voice cracked.

You just have to see her…

“Please, pick me.” Tears blurred my vision.

You just have to see her…

“Be mine and mine only.” Tears spilled and rolled down my cheeks.

You just have to see her…

“My feelings for you are stronger than his, I would do anything for you.” My words became stronger, more confident.

You just have to see her…

“Atsuko, I love you. I love you so much that it hurts. I can see it in your eyes too, the same feelings as I do. I know you love me Atsuko, my heart tells me you do. So please…” I sank down to my knees, my right hand holding onto my left wrist for support. My eyes looked at her pleadingly. She got up from her spot next to him and stood over me. She was crying.

She opened her mouth.

You know that she’ll break you in two

“I’m sorry, Minami…”

To be continued...


*bows* I hope I do not get shot...this was my first time writing AtsuMina...well, any of the AKB couples actually. I hope it wasn't too bad :3

I'd like to thank the blue person (Not monkey) Anon for proofreading all my errors~ You rock 

I'll be posting part two next week :3

[Haruko]

why atsuko....why!!! T_T takamina love you!!!!

[AFLynx]

  totally heartbreaking! I can't wait for the next chapter! pls update soon!

[kahem]

Why Acchan????! Who is that bastard?!!!!

[blueangel65]

The Story is not bad, actuaLLy I LIKE IT.. 
and You are not like a Beginner, heHe! Keep it up.. 

I read it for about 30 minutes, LOL! 'coz I want to understand it carefuLLy..
and Yeah! It's very sad, speciaLLy for Takamina.. Why Acchan? 
but we stiLL don't know what Acchan will say next to Takamina,
and I want to know what it will be, I still hoping that it will be Good..

WeLL Thanks Nyanoha-san! I LIKE IT.. GoodLuck! 

[LovelyGaki]

Next week?! Aw That's like forever

Ahah~ Nah I kidd, I'm sure I can wait...or can I?

But this fic is so sad *sniff-sniff* why Acchan! Why would you pick a guy over Takamina! She practically is a guy
I look forward to more

[Flean]

I really love the way you write this fic!!!    you're totally rocks!!    but this fic really a heartbreaking for me... 

What!!! I need to wait another 2 weeks??     nooo~~~      I need to know what happen next~~ 

I'll be waiting for your update~~~ 

[moekare]

This is really sad  and Acchan, I KNOW YOU LOVE HER!! Why did you break her heart?? 
and who's that guy?! LET ME KILL HIM AND BRING ACCHAN BACK TO MINAMI 

please I need your update 

[arisa03]

Hmmmm.. Mmmmmm.... I feel like i'm having a different idea than what's written here. 8DDD So I'd feel sad once I see the next part if it is true. Nice work here Nyanowan ; v ;. Always angsty, you. = 3=

[blughise]

 
OMG

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THIS IS TOO MUCH!!! WHY ATSUKO WHY !!!!!!!!!!!!!
TAKAMINA

I'll definitely kill that bastard!!!!!
Please update soon!!!

[Nyanoha]

Chapter 2

The kill

What if I wanted to break
Laugh it all, laugh it off in your face
What would you do?

My lips touched her neck as my arms snaked around her waist, pulling her closer. She shivered at the feeling and moaned out my name. I could feel the butterflies floating annoyingly in my stomach, making me regret and remember what I was doing in the first place. The pleasure was too much for me; I lost control at first kiss.

I picked her up and sat her on the table, her back to the mirror. Her legs wrapped around my waist, trapping me from going anywhere. My lips continued their way up her neck, stopping just below her ear. I could hear her breathing heavily, gasping as my hand slipped up her shirt. It was like my mind was playing tricks on me. This feeling, touching her, kissing her, it felt right yet, something inside me screamed “no!”

Why is this love so difficult?

Her hands found the buttons on my shirt and she slowly unbuttoned them. When she finished, she threw back the opening. I shivered at the cold air hitting my newly exposed chest. Her hands roamed my stomach, teasing me just above my waist line. I couldn’t help but moan.

“Minami…” The way I said her name sent shivers down my back. My voice has never sounded like that before, not even for him. How is it possible that Minami can do this to me? I love him, don’t I? He helped me find out what love was, how love worked.

Told me it was impossible to love a girl.

What if I fell to the floor
Couldn't take this anymore
What would you do?

Her lips found my jugular, sucking on the vein tenderly. My head twitched to the side, giving her more room. I was panting hard; everything she did confused me and made me want more. I bit back a moan. My hands tightened around her, pulling me closer. I tried to ignore the stinging pain as my breasts were pressed against her front. If only the barrier covering my breast would disappear, then maybe I can fe-

My eyes snapped open.

I stared at my reflection in the mirror. An unfamiliar face stared back at me, her eyes a darker shade of brown.  She was breathing hard, holding tightly to the pillar in front of her. Her support’s face buried itself deeper in the crook of her neck and the face’s emotions changed to one of pleasure. Her mouth opened up in a slight “o” and a small sound came out.  I couldn’t believe that face was mine.

Disgust flooded my stomach as it digested what I was doing.

Come break me down
Bury me, bury me
I am finished with you

I pushed back and stumbled out of her arms. Her dark hazel eyes showed confusion mixed with hurt. She tilted her head slightly and opened her mouth. My cell phone’s ringing interrupted her before she could speak. I walked to where my purse was and fumbled for my phone. I didn’t even have to look at caller ID to know who it was. He told me he’d call me.

I pressed the phone to my ear and hit enter. I didn’t even get to say hello. “I miss you.” He breathed into the phone. “Where are you?” I refrained from smiling at how worried he sounded; he could be so paranoid at times.

“I’m still at practice, about to leave soon. I’m in the dressing room changing right now actually.” I told him. He sighed out in relief. I couldn’t help but smile this time. He was really worried about me. I heard movement to my side and I turned around. I just had enough time to see Minami’s back as she slammed the door on her way out. My smile disappeared.

“What was that?” I remember the talk we had two weeks ago, remember him telling me not to hang out with her anymore. Telling me she was nothing but trouble. Though it hurt, I listened at first. I knew he was wise; he would never do anything to hurt me. After all, he loves me more than anything. He’s told me before.
Today however, I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t stand how depressed she looked each time she entered the studio, each time she laid eyes on me. Everyone saw it too; I saw it in their eyes as they looked between us. I just... couldn’t stand and watch anymore. I had to talk to her.

I waited till most of the members left and she was alone. We stared at each other for what seemed like an hour and before you knew it, I walked over and hugged her. She didn’t like it though; she tried to push me away but I didn’t let her go. We both struggled in our own situation till it happened.
My lips accidently brushed against hers.

What if I wanted to fight
Beg for the rest of my life
What would you do?

“Atsuko-chan?” His voice snapped me out of my flashback.

“Oh, sorry, that was Miichan. She slammed the door on her way out.” He paused for a second; the only thing I could hear was his breathing.

“Atsuko-chan, can you come over to my apartment now?” I thought about it for a second and agreed. I had nothing going on. I hung up my phone after and put it back in my purse. I turned to stare at the mirror I was staring at before. My face was back to normal, my breathing normal. The only sign of that moment with Minami was my hair sticking up in odd angles.  I combed it away with my fingers. Now nothing showed in the mirror of what events took place only minutes ago. I took haste and gathered my stuff and headed out the door.

I didn’t look around me to see if Minami was still in the studio.

You say you wanted more
What are you waiting for?
I'm not running from you

As I made my way to his apartment, I started to worry about my actions before.  What I did with Minami was wrong, it shouldn’t have happened. Yet why, why did it feel so right? I liked the feeling of when she kissed me, when her hands touched me. I’ve never had those feelings before, never felt the shrill electricity course through my body like that. 

Why didn’t it feel like that with him?

I love him. He changed my life in ways I didn’t know possible.  He taught me what was wrong and right. He was the best thing that ever happened to me, right? I felt compelled to be with him. That was love, right? The feeling of wanting to be with someone, needing to be with someone, knowing that they will love you back no matter what. He can give me that love. But then again… couldn’t Minami give me that love too?

I stopped just outside his apartment, just staring at the door. My thoughts were still running wild. I raised my hand to knock when the door opened. I looked up and smiled as I saw him. His black hair was slightly messy, which was cute, and he wore his usually attire, a black suite and a blue tie. He smiled brightly at me.
This was the one I fell in love with.

Right?

Come break me down
Bury me, bury me
I am finished with you

He took my hand and led me into the house, the door closing behind us. He tightened his fingers around my hand and I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. We stopped just next to the couch. I looked down at our hands and then back at him.

“Who was it I heard that slammed the door, Atsuko?” My heart thumped in my chest, wondering if he knew I was lying then. He wasn’t there, so of course he didn’t.

“I already told you, Mii-” His hand tightened around my wrist, making me wince.

“Don’t lie to me,” was all he said.  How could he know I was lying? Could he see it in my eyes? Were my reactions making him think that? If so, he still wouldn’t have known from the phone. His eyes glared for an answer. I decided to tell him the truth, he would understand, right?

“Minami…”

Look in my eyes
You're killing me, killing me
All I wanted was you

The sound echoed through the room as his hand found my cheek. My head wiped back in a painful manner. I looked back at him, tears stinging my eyes. I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing came out. His eyes were dark, no trace of those loving eyes that were there a couple of minutes ago.

“I told you to stay away from her, Atsuko. She is no good for you; she will only bring pain to you.” He told me. “I forbid you from seeing her.” But isn’t he the one bringing pain to me right now?

“Hisoka…” I pressed my hand to my stinging cheek. Tears overflowed his eyes and he took a step forward. I tried to back up but the couch was blocking me from doing so. He put his hand over my hand on my cheek. Pain. The only emotion I see in his eyes.

“Don’t you love me, Atsuko-chan?” His voice broke slightly. “A-Aren’t I enough to satisfy you?” That was enough to forgive him. I stepped forward and hugged him. He buried his face in my neck, pulling me closer. We stayed like that for a while, only hearing the other breath.

I was about to pull back when his grip tightened on my upper arm.

I tried to be someone else
But nothing seemed to change
I know now, this is who I really am inside

I gasped in pain, trying to squirm away from his grip. He tightened his grip even more. I looked up at him, pleading for him to let me go. His tears were gone, his eyes hard again. He was staring at my neck, staring at the small pink mark.

My eyes widened as I realized where it came from. His gaze turned to me; anger flashed from his face. I could see it in his eyes; he knows where it’s from. I tried to speak but he pushed me onto the couch. I thrashed my legs into the air as he made his way toward me, not wanting him to get closer. He pushed my legs down and jumped on top of me, my breath leaving my lungs. I heaved for air.

His fist pulled back and before I can put my hands up to defend myself, his fist crashes into my jaw. For the second time that day, my head is whipped back. Pain seized my face like I’ve never felt before. Tears stung my eyes and soon overflowed from the pain. I coughed slightly and turned my head away. I tasted blood.
We stayed in that position for a long time, till finally, he got off. I heard him make his way to the kitchen, heard him get something from the fridge. He came back and put a bottle of water on the coffee table. With that, he made his way to his room. He stopped just at the door. He turned towards me.

“I forbid you from seeing her again.”

He left with that warning.

Finally found myself
Fighting for a chance
I know now, this is who I really am

I wiped the tears from my eyes and stumbled off the couch, catching myself on the coffee table when I fell. I ignored the water bottle and made my way to the door. I tried to move as fast as possible, just in case he’d come out again. Once out the door, I ran from the apartment and into the night. I ran as fast as I could, ignoring every stare people were giving me.

When I was tired of running, I went into a small alley. I pushed past some metal trash cans and into a small space between two of them. I hugged my legs and laid my forehead on my knees. I began to cry, not caring if anyone found me or heard me.

Was love always this painful?

Come break me down
Bury me, bury me
I am finished with you

Was that truly love? Minami would never treat me like that though. Or maybe he was just protecting me? Something like that isn’t love, is it? I’ve heard of tough love, but that cannot be the meaning.  To love me one second, then hit me the next. That cannot be what love is about.

Was he simply confused with his feelings? No, that can’t be it. Minami didn’t act this way. She has never hit me before, well, not like that. She’s never enforced that much pain on me on purpose. If anything, she has at least apologized for it.
Minami…

Look in my eyes
You're killing me, killing me
All I wanted was you

He told me that I was forbidden to see her again, but that is pretty much impossible. She works in the same business as I do; we see each other every day.  Not only that but, my heart will fail me if I stop seeing her. She’s my best friend; it’s like separating two twins from each other. Or rather, two lovers from each other.
Why did this have to be so confusing? Why can’t I just decide who I love more? The man who told me what love was, or the girl that makes me feel funny, the one who has always been there for me. Images of what happened in the dressing room covered my thoughts, making me even more confused as I blushed from them.

Is it really not okay to love a girl?

She’s always been there for me, ever since I first met her. She may fail sometimes but that’s what makes her, her.  Most people think she isn’t funny at times, but to me, she is funny in her own way.  She was the one who helped me make it through in hard times, the one who held my hand whenever I was scared.

Does this feeling mean I’m in love with her?

Come, break me down
Break me down
Break me down

I stood up from where I was sitting and made my way into civilization. I looked up into the dark sky, wondering when I would see stars again, see the bright smiles of each and every one of them. I could still feel the pain from where he hit me, where he hurt me. Heart and all.

I was still very confused on what I felt. Everything, my mind, my heart, was confused. It’s better if I wasn’t with anyone maybe. Maybe then I wouldn’t get so hurt and beat up? I don’t care about myself though, I care for them. My heart criticizes me, screams at me to pick someone so it wouldn’t break any longer.

I began the journey to my house slowly, only stopping when I had to. When I finally got home, it was a little past my curfew. When my parents called me over, I simply ignored them and went up to my room, locking the door. I curled in a ball at the corner of my bed, my back to the door. I quietly sobbed to myself.
Maybe it was best if I was to never love at all.

What if I wanted to break?
What if I…
Bury me, bury me

The next day, I didn’t go to work, afraid of people seeing my bruises.


To be continued...

*hides behind shelter* Sorry...that was quiet sad wasn't it? xD It hurts me just as much as it hurts you guys ;___;/ My oshimen is getting hurt as well!

Thank you all so much for your comments, I'm glad that you liked it :3 I hope in the end it reached your expectations.  I would also like to say something that I didn't say before in the first chapter. I'm not sure if anyone really caught this, but the reason only a few AKB members were allowed in the club was not because of-I guess you can call it-low invitations but because of their age. The people I mentioned before were all above 20 :3

Thank you again for commenting. Please review again, I'd like to know your views on things :3

If I get enough, I might just post the 3rd chapter this weekend  *Review whore* Jk

I would also like to thank Anon for editing and reassuring me that it was good    You are awesome!

[Flean]

waaa..... I'm crying~~~ why~ why~ 

i love how you potrayed their emotions...  this chapter is really sad for me~~

i must kill that idiot!!!  how dare he hurt Acchan!!!   ARGH!!!! 

looking forward for the next chapter.... 

[kazuski]

REALLY  ?! Who is that idiot? I gonna kill him. 

How can he hit Acchan, twice  ?

And Takamina, don't give up yet, girl.  Acchan need you now.

To AU, I totally love you fic.  Even though it keep making my heart broken.   

anyway, thank for update 

[arisa03]

Man, you do a lot of things I don't, LOL. I should probably step up the pedestal and start continuing Lost. xD LOLOLOL Bah. Nanohaaaaaaa. What are you doiiinguu? ;_____; I need Chapter 3 now and mai happy AtsuMina ;____;. Update soon ;___;

[kahem]

That bastard deserves my fist in his face!!!!!

[khryz0421]

damn! he hurt acchan! i'll kill him!! 


btw there's a song in it right? bury me by 30 seconds to mars ..^^  i like that song..^^

[blughise]

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HOW DARE HIM HIT ATSUKO!!!!
I'm SO GOING TO HUNT HIM DOWN, THEN SLOWLY TORTURE HIM TO DEATH! HOW DARE HIM!!!!!
This makes me so angry!!!!

Atsuko better realize that it's Takamina that u have loved all this time!!!! That Dude just sweet talk you, there no right or wrong in love(though depending on the situation and in this case, this is very wrong! Hitting someone you love!!! That's Fcked up!!!)

please udpate soon

[Nyanoha]

Flean: I'm sorry I made you cry. *hands tissues* But don't worry, you are not the only one who wants to kill him Thank's for the comment!

kazuski: *puts pillows on wall* *pats* Thank you for the kind comment, sorry about the whole heart-breaking thing though 

arisa03: I do what I got to do Riri-chan~~  Yes, you must >=D And I'm not sure what I am doing For you, I shall post chapter 3 early  Thank you for the comment :3

kahem: Indeed he does Thanks for the comment!

khryz0421: Everyones first reaction...killing  Awesome! And yes, it is by 30STM (my favorite American band) I'm so glad you noticed! Thanks for the comment!

blughise: =O Rage indeed! * extinguishes fire* I hope this chapter will make you feel better Thanks for the comment!

Thanks for the comments everyone! I'll make sure to do something bad to him ne? (Jk (JK to JK) (JK?))

Confused yet?

_________________


Broken Strings

Italics-Atsuko POV
:
Bold-Takamina POV


Let me hold you for the last time
It's the last chance to feel again
But you broke me, now I can't feel anything

I walked into the studio and stopped. I pulled my jacket closer to me, still self-conscious to the fact that my bruises were still there. The one on my face was still there, but I covered it well enough with makeup. The one on my upper right arm and shoulder were not covered with makeup though, only covered by my jacket.  I wondered if anyone would notice; I wondered if she would notice.

I took a deep breath and started my way towards the dressing room. I made sure to come early enough that no one was around. It was silent around the studio, something that I never really witness often. It was something I wasn’t used to, something I never liked. I liked that it was always noisy inside; it made me feel comfortable, like I belonged in the group.

I went around the corner and stopped, backing up before they could see me. I held my breath. What were they doing here so early? They never come here early; they’re usually the last ones in the studio actually. I knew it was bad for me to stay where I was and listen, but my curious mind had other thoughts.  I leaned my face to the edge of the wall and looked over, just enough that I could see with one eye.

The taller one leaned the shorter one against the wall, her arm stretched out on the wall, trapping her. Their bodies were pressed against each other; even their legs were entangled.  They were locked in a staring contest, their eyes boring into the other. The taller one’s lips curled into a half smile as she leaned forward.  The one against the wall twitched, her hands going to the other’s waist, pushing her closer.

I watched as their lips touched the other, their eyes closing in bliss.


When I love you and so untrue
I can't even convince myself
When I'm speaking it's the voice of someone else

My hand went up to my mouth, my eyes widening as I saw the forbidden act. I tried to move my head to look away but I stood there frozen, unable to look away. My face blushed red as I saw hands going to places they shouldn’t be. I thought I was going to pass out from the blood rushing to my face when the taller one slapped the small hand that was making its way up her shirt. She stepped back.

“I win.” She smirked. The smaller girl pouted, crossing her arms.

“That’s not fair, Nyan-nyan, you cheated.  Again.”  The taller girl did not deny it.

“You never pushed me away Yuu-chan,” Haruna said, winking at Yuko. “You may say that I cheated, but we all know that you’ve been planning that from the beginning~” Yuko glared at her before pouting. She couldn’t hide the sparkles her eyes were making.  “That’s what I thought.” Haruna smiled at Yuko tenderly, taking one of her hands.  “Gomen, I could not help it, I’m just too competitive.” They started to look each other in the eyes again.

I gulped.

I made sure they weren’t looking. As quietly as I could, I rounded the corner and entered the first room on my left. I turned around and slid down the door, onto my knees. I stared out into the dark room waiting for my vision to get used to the dark, panting.

When my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I slowly got up and fumbled around till my hand flicked the switch. My heart pounded in my chest, sending shock-like waves to my bruises. Now my wounds felt more pain. My left eye closed as I felt the bruise there sting. I sighed out and looked around the room, my eyes sad.

Why must I see this now?

Oh, it tears me up
I tried to hold on but it hurts too much
I tried to forgive but it's not enough
To make it all okay

Tears welled up in my eyes but I held them there, not wanting to cry anymore.  I choked on a moan, coughing slightly from the force. My wounds pounded harder against my skin, irritating me to the point of holding the side of my face with all my might. Tears decided to roll down my cheeks then, making me grind my teeth in utter frustration. Why must I feel this way?

I growled at my obstacle of pain and tore the jacket away from my body in anger, throwing in in the corner. My shoulder burned from the force, angering me more. I grabbed at my shirt, pulling it up with so much force that the collar ripped. Something was still irritating my skin, not letting it feel free. I grabbed my bra and ripped it free, the clips on the back snapping open from the unexpected force. I let it drop to the ground.

I wiped the tears away with the back of my hand. I took a step forward, stumbling slightly, and then leveled myself up with the table in front of me. I took the hand away from my eyes and looked up at the dressing room mirror. Dark hazel eyes bore into mine. Those sad, confused eyes didn’t let me look away. They were powerful, a much great force than anything I’ve ever seen.

The eyes then looked down, to my naked back, releasing me. She made her way towards me, stopping just inches from my back. Her hand went up, stopping above my shoulder for a second, as if she was debating something. She then let her fingers lay on my shoulder, making me shiver. If it wasn’t her hand, I wouldn’t even have felt the touch.

But it was her.

You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real

My eyes traced her back, seeing if there were any other illicit marks that should not be on her skin. My eyes touched something that was just above her arm. My nose flared and before I could even try to debate with myself, I moved her so she was facing me. I froze as I saw multiple bruises on her. On her upper arm, her shoulder and…

I lifted my hand and trailed my fingers on her left side of her face. She was trying to cover it, that much I could make out. Her makeup was smeared from crying, the cover up also smeared in different places, showing the bruise’s full glory.  I pulled my hand back and let it fall to my side.

She was shivering. Was it because she was pretty much naked, or because I found out about the bruises? My right hand went to my left, grasping it. I tried to calm down before I was going to speak. I did not want to scare her.

“Atsuko… who did this to you?” I asked.  I couldn’t help but notice her jumping slightly. My eyes narrowed. Someone did do this to her then, and I bet I knew who it was too. I wonder if this was why she wasn’t here yesterday. Her mom only called me to tell me she wasn’t feeling good.

If I have not thought about coming early today, I probably wouldn’t have noticed. I wouldn’t have noticed her walk into the studio, wouldn’t have noticed her reactions as she saw the KojiYuu act in front of her. Most importantly, I wouldn’t have seen her enter this room, her face full of emotion.

When she entered the room, I stepped out of my hiding place, into the open. Yuko’s eyes twitched to me at the movement and when she saw me, she literally jumped to Haruna’s height. I ignored them and went to the door Atsuko went in. I opened it silently and slipped in, locking the door in the process. I then turned around in time to see her rip her bra off and walk forward to the mirror.

I saw her wide, scared eyes look up in the mirror, finally seeing me.


Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before?

My eyes went up to hers, watching as they shook. She could not look away; I was trapping her with my stare. She opened her mouth to say something, but only a small squeak came out. My hand went up and cupped her un-bruised cheek, watching in wonder as she leaned into my palm. I couldn’t help but twitch a smile.

“Acchan, who exactly did this to you?” I asked her again, this time in a calmer voice.  She closed her eyes slightly and took a deep breath, her nose rubbing against my palm. She opened her eyes slowly, exhaling. Her eyes were different, much calmer. Every emotion she had in them before was now gone. She opened her mouth to speak but the answer was not what I expected.

“I simply fell down my stairs is all; you don’t need to worry about it.” The lie fell from her lips as if it were natural.

“Now why....” I leaned closer. “Don’t I believe that?”  Her telltale eyes showed me everything I needed.  “It was him, wasn’t it?” She shook her head. I leaned closer till out noses touched.  “Atsuko, I want you to tell me the truth.”

“I alre-” My lips touched hers, stopping her from another lie.

“I don’t like you lying.” She flushed and opened her mouth to speak again before closing it. She was thinking; that much was for sure.

“What if I told you I wasn’t lying?” I took as step back, slightly angry.

“Bullshit,” I scoffed. “Why are you defending him? A guy like him shouldn’t be defended. He should be put in jail!” She flinched at my words.

“He didn’t mean…”

“Didn’t “mean”, Atsuko? This,” My hand went up to her bruises, emphasizing. “Shouldn’t be an accident either! How could you even think it was one?”

“If he truly loved you, he wouldn’t have done this in the first place, bringing pain onto you.”

Oh, what are we doing?
We are turning into dust
Playing house in the ruins of us

Her words were like a slap to the face, making me freeze. Why must I feel this way? More tears spilled my eyes as I realized that she was probably right. My legs gave out then and I fell onto my knees. She bent down, asking if I was okay, but I didn’t say anything. I was too focused on my thoughts, processing everything that has happened to me, seeing if that love I’ve been given was truly love.

I remembered when I first met him, how I used to see him in the same cafe every day where I got coffee on my way to work. I remember him coming over and asking me out, remembering as he told me the true definition of what love was and what isn’t. The day Minami told me she loved me, how he whispered he loved me more than a girl ever could, before squeezing my shoulder till it hurt.

I started shivering uncontrollably as I kept remembering more and more, till finally, I remembered something.  My mind raced as I remembered seeing him in odd places; in a bookstore reading a newspaper, at a concert with backstage passes, at a grocery store in the register next to me. Many, many more places.

How could I have not seen it, seen his true self?

Running back through the fire
When there's nothing left to say
It's like chasing the very last train
When it's too late, too late

“M-Minami...why… w-why didn’t I see it till now?” I looked up at her with pleading eyes, more tears falling down my cheeks. She pulled me in a hug and I sobbed out, fully crying. I hugged her tightly, grabbing at her shirt. She kissed my head, trying to sooth me with words. Her support made me cry even more.

I stayed like that for an hour, holding her for support as she hummed to me softly. I probably could have stayed like that for another hour when a knock was heard at the door. My head snapped up at the sound and I started to shiver again. Minami kissed my cheek, telling me it was okay. She then stood up, ready to get the door. If not for my hand stopping her from going, she might have gone.

She might have disappeared.

Oh, it tears me up
I tried to hold on but it hurts too much
I tried to forgive but it's not enough
To make it all okay

“D-don’t leave me…” she whimpered.  My heart pounded in my chest, squeezing and twisting my insides. I dropped to my knees and before she could blink, my lips pressed hard against her own. When she was able to blink, I stood up again, leaving her stunned.

“Don’t worry, Acchan. I’ll protect you, I promise.” With that said, I went to get the door. When I opened it, I didn’t expect who was behind it.

“Hi, Minami-chan,” He smiled. “Is Atsuko-chan in there?” I shook my head, still surprised.

“She’s not in here. She isn’t even in the studio yet; it is still too early for her to be here.” I said calmly when I regained my footing. I tried my hardest not to yell at him for everything he’s done, for making my Atsuko hurt and cry. My right hand went to my left wrist for support again. It helped me stay calm as he tilted his head, suspicious.

“Is that so? I thought she was here since she wasn’t at her house when I went.” The words rang in my ears.

"I don’t know what to tell you then. I’m not sure where she’d go. I haven’t talked to her in a while.” He nodded.

“Alright, if you say so. If you see her though, tell her I want her to call me and to remember what I told her the other day.” With that, he left, leaving me confused.

An arm pulled me back into the room.

You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real

I hugged her tightly, burying my face into her neck, scared. I was shivering more, remembering the coldness of his words, remembering the warning. Minami then asked me what he meant. I pulled her to the couch in the dressing room, and as she sat down, I pulled myself close to her.

 I told her everything.


Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before?

As she told me everything, I could feel my face drain of color. How did this happen to the person I loved? I kissed her forehead when she was done and pulled her close to me, rubbing her back as I tried to calm her down. She was breaking out in tears again. How much more does she have to go through?

I looked to the side, where the only window in the room was. The only thing I saw was the sky and birds flying in groups. Why was I getting the sudden feeling that we were being watched though? I looked down again at Atsuko, moving my hand up to wipe away her tears. My hand stopped when I was done, frozen.

My ears burned red as my mind finally cleared up and I saw the person in front of me, half naked.


But we're running through the fire
When there's nothing left to say
It's like chasing the very last train
When we both know it's too late, too late

I sniffed and tilted my head, watching as her face’s color was regained and changed to pink. Her eyes were staring at my body. I looked down and I could feel myself turn red. I forgot that I didn’t have clothes above my waist. I turned around and wrapped my around my chest, covering as much as possible.

“A-Ah…sorry!” Minami said, getting up and fetching my clothes. I just shook my head and squeezed my eyes shut. When I reopened them, a pile of clothes was in front of me and an embarrassed Minami as well. She scratched her cheek.

“Gomen, Acchan… but, I don’t think you can wear your bra. The clips are broken.” She offered me the clothes.

“But… better than nothing, right?” She laughed nervously.


You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real

We both walked out of the dressing room, Atsuko crossing her arms. I noticed more people in the studio now, talking along with everyone else. I turned to Atsuko.

“What do you want to do?” I had to ask it. I didn’t want her to stay here if she didn’t want to.

“I want to be with Minami.” was all she said. I couldn’t help but blush slightly.

“Hoho~!~ Was that a confession I just heard?~” We both turned to stare at Yuko. I couldn’t help but notice Atsuko looking away.

“Good morning,” I told her, hoping she’d turn her attention to me and not Atusko. “Isn’t it a little early for that right now?” For props, I put my hands on my hips.

She leaned down slightly so we met eye to eye. “It’s never too early for love.” She winked and danced in a circle. It amazes me how one minute she could be this hyper and then the next, about to drop dead.

I turned to look at Atsuko and noticed that she was still looking away. I took her hand in mine and squeezed. She finally turned to face me, her face red. I smiled at her and pulled her towards me as I started walking to the people just arriving.

“Also,” I heard Yuko call after us. “You should wear a bra when you come to work, Acchan~”

Who knew only a couple of hours could feel like an eternity.


Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse
So how can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before?
Oh, you know that I love you a little less than before

When I finally walked out of the studio, I looked up into the dark sky. Still no stars. I frowned sadly but looked to my right, watching Minami talk into her phone not too far away. I waited silently till she was finished and pulled the jacket closer. I could tell that tonight was going to be a long and cold one.

When Minami was done, we both started our way to her house, where I would sleep over as well.


Let me hold you for the last time
It's the last chance to feel again

Who would know that the feeling in my stomach was of someone watching us?
 

To be continued....

Well...I hope the different POV's didn't confuse everyone 

If you haven't already figured it out...each story has its own song :3 You don't need to listen to it...it just something that I thought went with the story. Like the lyrics and stuff. Usually I have more than one song to go with it...but with the help of Anon, I get just one >=3 Anon knows just how tedious it is working with me on them  Thank you Anon for also helping me by editing and helping with ze story You might just get your happy ending after all    ( )

[arisa03]

POV changes aren't too confusing except for the first time it changed. Are they being stalked? o A o. I can't wait for part 4 now. xD y u so angsty you mini? = 3=. At least Acchan knows now who she should be with. ; v ; . Update soon! ; v ; /

[Flean]

that idiot a stalker doesn't it?? i need to kill him!!!

I really hope they can be together...   the POV are not that confusing to me... 

i want a happy ending please...    and i cant wait for the next part!!!