A/N: I’m back~ yeay! Happy, happy! Well, I’ll start writing fanfictions again, even though sometimes I forgot that I always kept it in my drafts (you’re a genius). Here it is, a WMatsui OS from meeeeh!
I hope you all enjoy! :3
And thanks for Mr. AryaMachdi for helping me with it. I hate you too, my friend! (^ ^)
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Hasty Steps (WMatsui OS)
It’s a great day to go to the park. I usually go there to get some fresh air, since my parents are busy arguing about something that I don’t want to know. I’m not the type of person who really wants to know about people’s problems. All I know the topic is about ‘love’. Yes, my parents wants me to get married with someone they already chosen.
Unfortunately, my mom likes a different guy. I haven’t met one of them, and… I don’t really want to. I mean, I don’t want to marry someone that I haven’t met before. Besides, I want to date first. Well, that’s how it’s supposed to be, right? Yeah…
I was getting ready to go for a walk to the park, when suddenly my mom called me.
"Rena, dear, can you please come here for a minute?" To be honest, I hate it when one of my parents called me. Cause, every time they called me, it’s always about that stupid thing.
"But mom, I really want to go somewhere right now. Can we talk about this later?" I sighed loudly. I’m really tired with. I mean, can they just understand that I want to find someone special for my own life?
"It won’t take long, dear. I want you to meet someone and I know that you will like him." I sighed once again.
I waked to the living room and saw my parents are talking with someone. Yes, a guy. A guy that I haven’t seen before. This is surely will take long. I always yelled at them every time they tried this. They’re nuts, they really don’t understand that I really want to find my own someone special for my life. They always gave me a headache.
"Ah! Rena, you’re here. Come sit!" My dad. My typical dad. Who always tried his best to look gently, to talk softly in front of these guys. In reality, he is such a monster. Sometimes he hurts my mom, sometimes I got yelled by him for no reason. It’s really mad. My family, I meant.
I sat right next to my mom which she forced me to smile. Oh how I hate that. I like to smile, but I just really hate it when she tries to force me. What are we? Actors?
"So Rena, I like you to meet—" I cut her words. It’s rude, But I did.
"Save it! I don’t want this anymore. Please understand me, I want to find my own! This is stupid. Trying to make me fall in love with a stranger and then you want me to marry one of them? Tsk, I’m going! Bye!"
They really crossed the line. My patient was already running low, and they just had to make me angry for the hundred times. I’m not regretting this, I’m just going to run away from home and never come back.
I went back to my room to get all my clothes and put them into my bad. It really shocked my parents, even that guy. I tried to think for a minute, tried to find someone who could help me with this problem. I scrolled my contact list on my phone and it stopped on someone I’m close to.
'Juritan'
Yes, Matsui Jurina. But since we’re close with each other, I often call her Juritan rather than Jurina. It’s a nickname that she chose. I tried to think again before calling her. Am I really going to do this? Am I really going to run away from my house just because of this? Then again, why should I stop?
I sighed in frustration and pressed the call button. I waited for a couple of seconds until she picked up the call.
"Moshi moshi, Jurina desu~ Ah! Rena-chan, what’s up?"
I got to admit it. Jurina is really a cute person. She has a great personality and she’s really popular with the guys and also the girls. Well I guess that’s because she has that charms that made all of the guys and girls falling for her.
I only think Jurina as a friend. A close friend. She also has this habit to kiss cute girls, I don’t know if she had kiss a boy before. She had kissed me a lot of times. She always use her special techniques to still a kiss from me. It always made me blushed, though.
I’m a bit nervous saying this to Jurina, but I have no other choice.
"Etto… J-Juritan, can I stay at your house for a couple of days? T-there’s something I want to tell you, but not now. So, can I come to your house and tell you all about it?"
I sighed, "Oh… It felts good now that I already asked her."
"Eh? Of course you can, Rena-chan!"
She doesn’t sound curious. Well, she’s always like that. There is always a cheer in her voice. I really like that side of hers, it always calmed me down a little and I always giggled at her childish side. My friends always teased me when it comes to Jurina. Because they say that I fangirl too much, but to me it’s just normal.
I really admire her, not because I have feelings for. But because she is the right person to be admire. My friends said that I look like I have feelings for, but seriously I don’t. I mean, I like guys and Jurina is my best friend so there’s no way I will have feelings for her.
"Really? Wow! That sounds great, I’ll see you soon then!"
I hang up the phone and I put my phone back to my bag.
I felt so happy when she agreed that I could stay at her place for a couple of days. Since I need the time to find a job and I guess a small apartment to live in. I don’t want to be a bother to Jurina. Plus, this is actually will be my first time staying at her place. Well, usually she’s the one who stays at my place cause my parents actually won’t allowed me to stay at someone’s place.
I took my bag and walked downstairs. I found my parents are still talking with that guy. I guess they won’t care if I leave the house. I ran a little to the front door. I just want to get out of this house.
I walked quickly as I could. Since Jurina’s apartment is just a couple of blocks away from my house. I finally made it to her apartment and rang the bell. Thankfully Jurina was the one who opened the door for me and she always put her best smile every time she’s greeting her guests.
"Rena-chan, you’re here! So, what—"
She couldn’t finished her words. I hug her tightly and I almost cried.
"J-Jurina… I ran away from my house, I don’t want to live there anymore. My parents are just so annoying. I-I just can’t live there…"
Jurina was really shocked when all of a sudden I gave her a hug. She stroke my head gently, tried to calm me down.
"It’s okay, Rena-chan."
I didn’t say another word to her. She pulled me to come inside. I sat on the couch and waited for Jurina to say something to me, since I don’t have any other words to say to her. I’m exhausted, frustrated, depressed and stressed. All I want right now is to go to sleep and try to calm myself down even though it’ll take hours for me to calm down.
Jurina sat next to me and all of a sudden she hugged me tightly. I have no choice but to hug her back. Well, I actually needed a hug from her, I guess she’s the only one who could calm me down. I chose the right place to come then.
"Rena-chan, could you explain happened between you and your parents?"
She asked softly while she’s giving me her warmth.
"My parents forced me to get married with someone that I haven’t met before. They chose the guy, but I always reject what parents always wanted."
I answered her calmly as I could, even though it’s kind of hard to explain. I don’t want to remember about all of those things, it’s only making me more and more frustrated. I realized that her grip loosened, but after a second she embrace me tightly again. I didn’t think about that too much, though.
She keeps embracing me until I fell asleep, resting my head on her shoulder.
The next morning I woke up and I was in Jurina’s bed. I guess she carried me all the way to her bedroom. Thankfully my weight isn’t too heavy otherwise she carried me while risking her life. I’m just glad that I have her in my life even though we’re only friends, but having her in my life feels like I have ‘someone special’.
Well don’t think something like that, though. I only love her as a friend. As sister, I guess. She’s really special to me and I’ll treasure her forever. I know it’s too much but it’s true. The door opened, revealing the person that I was thinking of.
"Ah! Good morning, Rena-chan. You slept on the couch last night so I just carried you and let you sleep on my bed instead. Did you sleep well?"
She greeted me cheerfully. And I smiled to her.
"Yes, I did. Thank you very much, Jurina. Sorry for bothering you."
Jurina chuckled and sat next to me on the bed. I didn’t realized that my heart is beating faster and fasted when Jurina moves closer to me. Why am I feeling like this? Keep it together, Rena.
She stroked my head gently and stared at me. They was she stares at me, it feels… It looks… Different. I don’t know, something like that. But why does my hear keep beating? I tried to ignore it and just Jurina a smile.
"You’re very welcome, Rena-chan. You’re not a bother to me, so don’t worry. Well, I guess I’m going to take a shower now. I set your breakfast on that table, hopefully you will like it."
She stood up from the bed and rushed to the bathroom. I touched my chest and my heart is still beating. I don’t know why I’m feeling like this. It’s not my first time I’m feeling like this but every time I’m with Jurina, I always feel like my heart is going to jump out off my chest. It doesn’t hurts though, but I keep asking myself the same question still there’s no answer. I still couldn’t find the answer for it.
I heard the shower turned on so I just stood up from the bed and walked to the table to have my breakfast that Jurina made. I eat my breakfast slowly. It tasted good, I didn’t know that Jurina is a really good cook. Then I noticed that the shower is off, I guess Jurina already finished having a shower. But then…
"I-Itai!"
I heard Jurina scream from the bathroom and not just that but I heard something fell before Jurina screamed. I stood up quickly from the chair and ran to the bathroom, after I opened the bathroom door I found Jurina laying on the floor trying to stand up. The worst thing is that she’s… naked. Even though I could only see her back but still she’s laying there on the floor naked. I shook my head and help her stand up.
"Jurina! Oh God, are you okay? Did you slipped?"
I asked her while blushing. I don’t know why but Jurina’s back is so flawless and her skin is very smooth. I felt my hear beats getting faster and fasted. It came back, this weird feeling. I wrapped her with the towel, I still feel my cheeks are burning from blushing.
We stared at each other and I guess Jurina didn’t noticed that she’s only wearing a towel right now. Well even though we often change our clothes together but this time the atmosphere feels really different. I don’t if I should hate this feeling or just let it be. I want it to just go away but how can I make it go away? It’s not that simple to just make feelings like this go.
She blushed after noticing that she’s only wearing a towel.
"E-eh!? R-Rena… I just slipped. I’m okay, don’t worry!"
She pinched my cheeks and walked out from the bathroom. That’s pretty awkward for me and I guess it’s really awkward for her too. I walked out the bathroom after I think about what had happened earlier and went to the table to finished my breakfast.
"Oh. By the way, thank yo for the breakfast! It’s really good!"
I thanked her. But Jurina is busy drying her hair after she puts some clothes on. I’m glad that she already puts some clothes on, othewise I will have a hard time to control myself. I’m worried about Jurina though, she didn’t respond when I thanked her. Is she really alright? It’s not often she’s like this, it really makes me worried about her. Maybe she was thinking about something so that’s why she slipped.
"Jurina, are you okay?"
I walked to her and gave her a tight hug. I’m really worried about her. She tried to pull away but I tightened the hug. I though I was strong enough to hold her but she’s stronger than me so she pulled away from the hug.
I was confused, did I do something wrong? Suddenly she pins me against the wall. My cheeks start to flushed red, this feeling. This feeling that I keep having since 3 years ago. What is this? Does it mean I have feelings for Jurina? No, this is wrong. Loving th same gender is wrong.
I felt Jurina gripping my hands tightly and she stared straightly into my eyes. Slowly, she leans in and now her gaze was on my lips. My hear is beating fast every time Jurina leans in. Is she really going to kiss me? I shouldn’t do this.
I was too late when I felt her lips was on mine. My eyes widened and I struggled to push her away but she keeps kissing me roughly. She’s too strong and I’m too weak. Thankfully I succeeded to push her away. I can see guilt in her eyes.
"R-Rena… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—"
I don’t know if I’m angry or I was shocked. I cut her words, to be honest I really hate cutting people while they’re talking but this is just too much. I wasn’t read and this is really wrong to do. What is wrong with Jurina?
"What the hell, Jurina!? What is wrong with you? Why did you kissed me?"
Jurina just stared the floor. I could see she can’t say anything nor explain about this. Then I realized I was crying, I was really angry at Jurina. This is forbidden, and I just can’t accept this.
"Jurina, this is forbidden! I can’t accept this, I just can’t…"
Jurina tried to hold my hand but I pulled away.
"But Rena, I love you! I have feelings for you!"
Now I know why Jurina always acted like that whenever she’s with me. She has feelings for me, she loves me. Then, do I also have feelings for her? Is it true that I have feelings for her? No… I don’t have any feelings for her, I only love her as a friend and that’s it.
I tried to answer her but nothing came out from my mouth. I breath heavily and everything looks blurry now. I ran out of her bedroom and I heard that Jurina’s screaming, calling for me. But I just can’t go back right now. I’m having a hard time figuring out about my feelings. How do I forget about all of these? I’m tired of having this mixed feelings. I’m tired of this, Jurina.
I ran and ran. I’m still thinking about Jurina, I just couldn’t stop thinking about her, about what I’ve done to her earlier. I know that I hurt her, but I have no other choice, that’s the only way I could do. I noticed that I ran all the way to the park that I always hang around every time I have problems with my parents, or just problems that I made. I started to walk slowly and searched for a bench to sit on. Finally I found a bench and I sat there, thinking.
Suddenly, there’s these two girls past and sat on a bench not far from mine. I looked at them and imagined they are me and Jurina. The two couple are being all lovey dover and I just sat on the bench quietly. There’s a man sitting beside me, he was reading his newspaper and suddenly he started to talk to me.
"You keep staring at those girls quite a while. What’s wrong?"
I got shocked when I heard him asked me that. I mean the one who noticed I was staring at those girls are him, not the girls. I’m trying to find the right words to answer him, I also need to be polite since he’s an adult. But I actually feel a bit embarrassed that he knows that I was staring at them.
"Oh. It’s nothing, sir."
I lied. To be honest, I really hate lying and it’s also wrong. But I guess he knows that I’m lying, well I’m not good at lying so maybe that’s the reason why he could tell that I’m lying.
"Hey! You don’t need to lie, I already know why."
And again, he really made me shocked. Why can I be read so easily?”
"Y-you do?"
I guess right now I looked pretty weird in front of him. Well I couldn’t help it cause he’s the one who could read my mind. He chuckled, and now I feel a bit scared sitting with him now.
"Of course I know. I can see that you’re jealous of those girls, am I right?"
Jealous? Really? Then, does that means… I do have feelings for Jurina? I don’t want to have this feelings for her, it’s too much and my parents will kill me if they know I like girls. But I guess I won’t come back to my house since my parents already pissed me off. I sighed loudly. He’s right, I am jealous of those girls.
"I guess, I am."
He sat his newspaper beside him and focus on the conversations that we’re having right now. This guy is really interesting though, he can really read my mind or maybe I’m just too easy to be read by someone. I know, I’m not a good liar.
I looked at him, preparing for the next words that will come out from his mouth.
"I’m a teacher, dear. I teach girls in an all-girls high school so I really know about these kind of stuffs. Sometimes some of my students come to me for advises, it really made me happy."
No wonder he knows everything. But I still want this feelings to just go, just let me love Jurina as a friend.
"I can’t lie to you anymore. But, it’s true that I have feelings for my best friend and we have the same gender. This kind of love is forbidden, I don’t want to have this kind of feelings for her, I just want us to be friends."
I played with my fingers and wait for him to answer.
"Dear, to be honest, my daughter is also like you. At first she really feel hesitate to love people, but she ended up falling in love with a girl. But for me, if you love her then love her. Follow what your heart say, don’t try to forget about the feelings you’re having right now because one day you will definitely regret it."
His words are really something. I looked at him and smiled. He is actually a really nice person and how I wish he was my teacher when I was still in high school. I stood up from the bench and bowed to him.
"Thank you very much, sir. Now I know what to do, I hope I could see you again. See you soon!"
I thanked him and he smiled at me.
I walked back to Jurina’s apartment, now I will say everything to her. I will explain everything, about my feelings that I’ve been hiding from her until now. I want her to know that I also have the same feelings as her and I don’t care what will other people say about me. I arrived at her apartment and opened the door.
"Tadaima~"
Jurina isn’t answering. She’s probably asleep but I keep going to her room just to make sure she’s really sleeping. I actually regretted for what I did to her, I didn’t meant to hurt her feelings like that. Well, what can I do? I was confused with my own feelings and I screwed everything up.
I slowly opened her bedroom’s door and found her laying down in her bed while she’s facing the wall. I walked to her bed and laid beside her with her back facing me.
"Jurina…"
She’s isn’t responding.
"Jurina… I wanted to tell you something…"
I sighed, she’s still isn’t responding.
"Look… I ran off because I was such a coward. I didn’t know why, I just quickly thought of what will happen if I accepted your feelings. How will my friends react to it, my family, and people around us. I don’t want us to suffer more than we’re bargain for, Jurina."
I stopped for awhile, then I continued.
"I love you too much that I don’t want to see you hurt. I just want the best for the both of us. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry for running away…"
I heard her sobbing and at that time I know that she started to cry.
"Please don’t leave me again…"
Finally, she’s responding. Even though hearing her voice like that it really hurts me. I really hate it when she cries.
"I won’t. Come here…"
Jurina turn around and I noticed that her eyes are red and swollen. She had been crying this whole afternoon. I apologized while hugging her tightly in my arms, her body was quivering as I continued to rub her back in an act of comfort. I kept holding her as she kept crying silently in my arms.
"I won’t leave you again… I promised.."
Her response was just a sob from her mouth, my aching heart couldn’t stand another more of her painful sounds. My arms embraced her more tightly than before. Right now, she was secured in my arms. No one will hurt her anymore. Not even me.
I gave her forehead a soft kiss. “I love you, Jurina. I will never leave you. Ever.”
I laid there in silence, hearing the steady beating of my heart synchronized with hers. All I wanted in this moment was her warmth, her body in my arms and peaceful silence to complete the atmosphere around the room.
Neither of us talked after that. I could only hear her soft sniffs and her shaky hand entwined with mine.
I didn’t say anything, so does she. And we plan it to keep it that way.
THE END
Topic: kizumi's OS Collection | WMatsui, FuruYanagi (Read 29055 times)