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Chapter 41: Don't look back
“Have you seen Nakazawa-san at all lately?” Eri asked Sayumi as they placed the finishing touches of their outfits by placing (or clipping) the hats on their heads.
“Not at all... It’s weird though, normally, she would sleep over once or twice a week… But it’s been two weeks now, and here we are, performing our new single in Mezamashi…”
“It’s weird though, Aruiteru isn’t going to be released until next month, why the early move?”
“I’m not sure, UFA is weird sometimes, but they are our boss so we just have to go along…” Sayu sighed as she stared in the mirror.
It’s true… Nakazawa-san hasn’t visited us or anything lately… I wonder why…Reina thought as she also put the Aruiteru hat on her head.
Did something happen?
What was it…?
Yuko had nearly ran back to her house, her emotions were in a huge maelstrom of confusion ever since she felt the other half of her soul pull away from her those ten minutes ago. For some odd reason, she could not stop the tears that had been the final bid of farewell for that spirit that had left her.
Why?
Why her?
Yuko went out to her back porch, eyeing her personal tidy garden which was like a painting originating from China. The beautiful landscape had calmed her down a bit, as she wiped her tears away. She looked down as she wiped away the tears, still trying to process what had just happened. However, she imagined that if she were to look into a mirror, she would find someone with lifeless eyes staring back…
“Don’t leave me…”
Yuko looked up again, and there, her Ojou-sama was, panting from all the running she must have done in order to find Yuko.
“Don’t leave me behind…” Rika said again, her eyes stained in fear and desperation. “Please don’t go…”
Yuko simply looked down at the woman standing in her garden. For some odd reason, Yuko was not wearing a look of concern on her face like she thought she would if she had happened to find Rika in a fragile and saddening mood. But why? Why wasn’t she worried about Rika’s safety? Why was she viewing Rika almost like a complete stranger to her instead of the demi-goddess that she was bound to?
Just what was it about this person that could possibly chain me?
“Those eyes…” Rika’s eyes sank deeper into fear; those eyes she has seen before on Yui... The eyes of someone dear to her looking at her as if she was never known to them… As if the precious connection between them was now completely one-sided…
“Please don’t look at me with such distant eyes!” Rika collapsed on the ground, crying into her hands.
“You should go back to the apartment…” Yuko said as she walked towards the demi-goddess. “I am your tool. Is it a bad thing if you hurt me? You don’t have to worry, I don’t have that intention…But I will come back to you another time… I need more time… I’m confused…”
Rika looked up at Yuko with a tear-stricken face, but nodded slowly.
That was a lie… The truth was already clear…
“Eh? Nakazawa-san is here? Seriously?” Risa asked as she flopped over the sofa, arms draped over a pillow at Megumi’s legs.
“Yeah, her visit was too sudden…”
“Silly Megumi-san, Nakazawa-san’s entrances are always sudden.”
“Not that kind of sudden…” Megumi laid down on the sofa, “Right after you all left for the Mezamashi filming, she came… Is it my delusion?”
“What is?” Risa looked at Megumi with a bemused expression.
Unknown to them, Maki was standing behind the wall, near the door frame, listening in on the conversation. Originally, she had intended to drop by and converse, but hearing the topic ahead of time, she could not help but feel obligated to listen as she feared that the topic might drop as soon as she stepped into the room.
“I don’t know… Something’s strange…”
“How so?”
“She is the same as always…” Megumi began fiddling with her hair, “but somehow… Something’s a bit off about her…”
Maki did not want to hear anymore. Instead, she turned around and went back from hence she came. However, as she went up the stairs and into the 3rd floor, where her room was, she had happened to find a familiar person walking towards her.
“Yuko-san? Have you seen the others yet?” Maki said, continuing to walk towards the older.
“Not yet, I originally planned to see Ojou-sama, but Megumi told me that she and the other members are filming their new PV. So I’m going to drop by again tomorrow.”
“Yeah, she dyed her hair blonde a few days ago for the PV. It’s temporary though, so it will probably last a few months and that’s it,” Maki said as she walked past the second head.
“My curse has been lifted…”
Maki whirled around, watching as Yuko had stopped walking, and was now facing her. Why was she telling her this? Maki was processing all kinds of possibilities until Yuko spoke up again.
“...Haha, just wanted to see your reaction if I had ever said something like that,” Yuko tilted her head in a smile.
“What the… Don’t joke about that…” Maki lowered her head as she still kept her eyes on the other, nearly mumbling her reply.
“More than my being released… If you were released, Reina would be happy. She’d be really happy…” The smile on Yuko’s face became tinted with sadness. “At least you could be with someone dearest to you…” Yuko turned around and kept walking.
“Don’t tell me…” Maki’s eyes became clouded with fear, “Don’t tell me those kinds of things… I don’t want to know such things…That’s the worst…”
But I’m the one…
“Eh? What are you doing here, wandering the park?” a familiar voice called out from the bench.
Yuko turned around, finding a most familiar face sitting casually on the bench nearest to her.
“I should be asking you that, Nacchi,” Yuko chuckled as she went over and sat down with her fellow first generation member.
“Just felt the need for a little more fresh air, that’s all!” Natsumi beamed, showcasing what gave her the nickname of ‘the face of Morning Musume.’
“You copier, I was out for fresh air too~!” Yuko glared playfully at her companion, to which Natsumi simply smiled back and lightly punched Yuko’s shoulder. “Nonetheless, how are you and Kaorin doing?” the older smirked.
“You know, I still can’t get over that…” Natsumi mumbled as she leaned her head back, looking at the sky.
“What? That I used a phone?”
“No, that you tricked me so that Kaorin and I would purposely end up meeting!”
“Oh that silly thing? Scandalous, don’t you think?” Yuko laughed as she waved her hand dismissively.
“Scandalous? You were the one who came up with that!” Natsumi pouted in frustration.
“Who cares, you’re in love with Kaorin, yes? There’s nothing wrong with helping you two pair up,” Yuko smiled.
“Eh?”
“I mean, I don’t like seeing you sad, so I’m trying to make you happy by trying to get you with Kaorin. Understand?”
“Eeeh?!” Natsumi took both hands and shook Yuko’s shoulders with them, “Yuko, what’s wrong?! You’re acting sane all of a sudden!” Yuko simply laughed and pried Natsumi’s hands off.
“Well, this is out of the ordinary when I’m outsane (I refuse to use insane because that would mean I’m in the sane of reality) but this is really the closest to my true feelings. Sorry if it’s too unusual.”
“Why should you apologize? For being outsane?” Natsumi chuckled as well. “Well what brought upon your change?”
“Actually, it’s nothing really. But you did play some sort of influencing role I guess.”
“Really? What did I do?” Natsumi leaned against her hands planted on the bench, facing Yuko.
“You really want to know?” Yuko looked at her with a smile.
“Of course I do!”
Yuko moved forward until her forehead connected with Natsumi’s, and rested her hand on the other’s head, almost patting it. “I’ll never tell.”
Natsumi became confused. Why couldn’t Yuko tell her? Why was Yuko also being a little more forward than usual? Why was Yuko actually being sane today?
“You never noticed, and that’s fine. That’s how it should be,” Yuko smiled almost sadly as she pulled her head away from Natsumi’s own.
“Waaait, this change of character, does this mean you’re going to give up on the booze too?”
Yuko snapped her head suddenly to face Natsumi, looking at the other with a crazed look, as if Natsumi had three heads. “What the hell, are you crazy?!”
“Oh well!” Natsumi laughed as she stood up, stretching, “Sorry about this, but I have to go now. I promised Kaorin that I would drop by her house to pick up something. See you later!” Natsumi waved as she walked away.
Yuko also waved back as she watched Natsumi’s fleeting figure, fleeting as much as her waves were slowing down, along with her smiling slowly being tainted with sadness.
But I’m the one being crushed under it all.
Rika and Yuko were sitting on chairs, separated by a small circular table, on the balcony of Rika’s room. Rika was wearing a simple black windbreaker, complimenting her blonde hair, while Yuko was clad in her white leopard print including a white fur collar jacket.
“About those weeks ago… Things had changed. I have various things to consider ever since that day. What I… I only… Erm… I tried to work out the origins. I have thought about it constantly, but there wasn’t anything useful from it… However, I can tell you one thing… I can’t stay by your side forever. I can’t do it. You can’t bind me anymo—”
SLAP!
“Ungrateful miscreant…” Rika said as she gritted her teeth, “Traitor! Traitor! Who are you going to depend upon? Depend on someone else’s kindness?! You have no where to go! Even when your curse is gone, you can’t exactly waltz up to your Mother’s house, claiming that you are the daughter she has forced herself to forget about! Will you go home now?! What would the reaction be?! Would you find happiness?! Will she even accept you after she tossed away her memories of you?!”
“I know…”
Rika slowed her panting, her fists pressing hardly on the table from her yelling before.
“I know… I’m this free…” Yuko felt a few tears come from her eyes, “…Yet I became this lonely…”
Rika calmed down further, and her fists loosened.
“Even though I have been released from the curse… I still can’t have the person I love… This curse that connects me to everyone unconditionally is gone… It’s impossible to turn back time and unbreak the curse…”
Rika continued staring, listening.
“However…I can’t feel that I am not going to be ‘happy’ just because I don’t have that experience. I can’t assume that I will never be ‘happy.’ I’m free, but I’m also lonely and depressed. I do believe that I can achieve happiness by my own hands… And that it’s waiting for me out there in the future… I will finally live my life…”
Rika placed her arms on the table and rested her head on it, not looking at Yuko at all.
“…Rika?”
She didn’t like being called by her first name by any Orochi… She had only permitted the first head to call her that…
“Rika. If everyone else separates from you, there’s no place for you to return to… You won’t be able to experience happine—”
“Go away.”
Yuko silenced herself, looking down at the person before her.
“You’re annoying me. Go away.”
Yuko didn’t need to be told twice. She simply stood up and opened the sliding door. Before leaving, she finally said, “Think about my words carefully.”
The door…
Reina sighed heavily as she fell backwards onto her bed with her arms outstretched; she was clearly bored. She would have loved to call Maki again, but knew that her admiration was out there in a meeting somewhere, and she wouldn’t dare interfere a meeting.
“Maki… So until your meeting ends, I’m supposed to go insane?” Reina said as she stared at the necklace the soloist gave her a month ago, watching it sway back and forth as she became entranced by its design.
I’ve been getting around to wondering lately…
“Goto-san, are you sure you were listening to the meeting? You didn’t seem like you were paying much attention…” the manager said as she waved a hand in front of the aforementioned person.
“Eh? Was I really that spacey?” Maki raised a brow, moving her manager’s hand away from the vicinity of her sight.
“Is it a lover?” the manager smirked mischievously.
“Haha, of course not,” Maki laughed, “You too. Normally, you would give me a strict lecture about how I’m not allowed to spend too much time with guys in fears of the press, what’s with the look of mischief?”
“I don’t know, but it’s just… You’ve really been thinking about things lately. I doubt that it’s about a lover, knowing that you don’t spend that much time with guys anyway.
“Yeah… I’ve really been thinking about things lately…” Maki said as she leaned her head against the window. “I’ve been thinking about many things lately…”
When will you open the door to me?
<3
Topic: Our Cursed Gift [Chapter 47: Our Final Promise][COMPLETE] (Read 170993 times)