Good evening! Or afternoon. Or morning. Whatever timezone you're in. ^^
I am kuma-san, and I like writing, be it on paper or on a computer, during my free time, though I never post anything that I write. Until now, that is.
This one here is something I have written quite a while ago. I'm hoping to make it a series of one-shots all related to each other.
So, ladies and gentlemen, please enjoy this little story!
Tales from the Danso Cafe
(and outside it)
Order 1: a sliver of silver in the skySlurp.
A tiny girl sloppily devours the cup of instant ramen she calls breakfast.
Takahashi Minami is in a slump today.
The rent has been piling up for months now, and just yesterday the manager at the convenience store fired her for shouting at a customer.
Slurrrp.
She was just helping out the old lady, goddammit! It wasn't the her fault the obaasan forgot to wear her hearing aid that day. And she was on her period too, so her temper was running pretty high…yeah.
Slurrrrp.
Minami angrily puts down the now empty ramen cup and looks forlornly around the tiny 1DK apartment she has lived in ever since she dropped out of university more than a year ago. Ever since she was practically disowned.
She wonders at what could have been had she not broken under the pressure from her parents and her scholarship. Would she still be living comfortably in the dormitory, with money coming from mother and father every month?
The answer, of course, is yes.
A heavy sigh escapes her lips.
She leaves the comfort of her kotatsu and gets dressed for a day outside.
Perhaps a walk will ease her troubled mind.
Minami fixes the ribbon on her head and opens the door.
Maybe a bowl or two of katsudon as well.
~~~
"Takahashi-san."
A voice she does not want to hear right now calls her as she makes her way down the stairs. The girl turns around.
Fucking shit. "G-good morning, Akimoto-jiisan."
The plump man gives her a knowing smile.
She returns with a forced one.
"Off to find a new job?" he asks.
Noooo, she was just out to get some comfort katsudon. But--
"I heard from Togasaki-san you got fired yesterday."
How the hell did that guy kno--
"He was at the FamilyMart when it happened, you know."
Minami scowls.
"Stop reading my mind old man!"
Akimoto chortles and his smile grows bigger.
"I don't have telepathic powers. I just know you too well already, Takamina. How many jobs has it been already this year? Six? Seven?"
The short girl bows her head. "Nine, actually." She mutters.
"Hmm..." Yasushi strokes his flabby chin, frowning at the sight of the small dejected girl at the stairs.
"Takamina..."
Minami looks up at her landlord with trepidation. He grins.
"I have proposition for you."
She does not like the twinkle in his eye.
~~~
Minami wipes the sweat off her brow and glances at her watch. It is 8:45 PM.
She has been roaming the streets of Akihabara since noon.
"Fucking shit!"
A few passersby stare at her and she shrinks in embarrassment, cursing the old man who put her in this predicament.
"I have a proposition for you."
The girl raised an eyebrow.
"Get yourself a job by the end of the day and you only have to pay half of what you owe. Plus I'll cancel next month's payment."
Her other brow also raised.
"Of course, there is a catch." Yasushi's grin widened.
Her brows furrowed.
"You have to get it in Akiba."
"Ehh?!" What kind of proposition was that?
"Also, if you don't get a job or you don't get it in Akiba, I'll double your debt."
"What the hell jiisan!" Minami whined.
The man's grin grew even wider.
"So, do we have a deal, Takahashi?"
The ribbon-wearing girl nodded once at the Akimoto before taking her leave.
"...Deal."
As she exited the complex, Minami thought about the landlord's strange proposal.
Getting a job in Akihabara shouldn't be that hard, right?Wrong.
So far, by some sick twist of fate, Minami has not seen even a single job opening at all the shops she has passed by. Hell, she had even begged at some places to let her apply. They all declined though.
The bastards.The girl sits down at a nearby bench and buries her head in her small hands, eyes wet and glistening.
How am I going to pay Akimoto-san now?Her stomach suddenly grumbles.
She did not even get to eat katsudon today.
Slowly, tears escape her eyes, falling down her cheeks and to her hands and to the ground. What seems like an eternity passes by as the world around the little girl goes on.
"Yo Mariko-sama, we’ll be going now!"
She raises her head to see two girls leave the cafe facing Minami. Wait, a cafe? Was she so depressed that she did not notice the cafe in front of her? The short girl looks up at the shop's sign.
Cafe Ricori.She has never seen this place before. Did it open just recently? She examines the simple yet modern facade until something more wonderful—if there is such a thing more wonderful—than a giant bowl of katsudon catches her eye.
A "HELP WANTED" is taped on the glass window.
A smile brighter than the neon signs of Kabukicho slowly lights up Takahashi Minami's face.
~~~
This week was exceptionally good, a tall slender woman muses while she lazily skims over the business ledger. Her café had opened just last month but already they had to close quite late on some days. Who knew danso cafes would be quite a hit with the ladies?
However, despite her recent success, something tugs at the back of the woman’s mind.
She is not satisfied.
It’s not that she is unhappy with her staff. Heavens no. Her three waitresses—er, waiters—Sae, Sayaka and Yuko were a bunch of freakishly hypercompetent individuals whose crazy antics charmed customers into visiting again and again. There were also the part-timers Miichan and Jurina, a college student and a high school girl with smooth talking skills that made many a female blush or laugh—or facepalm (due to the younger one’s puns).
Akane, her chef and Jurina’s cousin. was a marvel in the kitchen, and the bird lover usually made deliciously short work of meal orders. There had to be a compromise on the menu though—Churi vehemently refused to cook any feathered animal.
And then there was her: Shinoda Mariko, ex-model and now creator, owner and barista of Café Ricori.
Now, you may ask, why would Mariko-sama open a danso café of all things?
No one knows, really. Mariko-sama does what she wants anyway. And business is going perfectly. So perfectly that it was starting to bore her.
A little more spice in the curry would be nice, no?
“Yo Mariko-sama, we’ll be going now!” A holler breaks Mariko out of her reverie. She looks up from the ledger and smiles warmly at Akane and Jurina making their way to the door.
“Get home safely, you two! You still have school tomorrow Jurina!”
“Haaaai~”
“Today was tiresome, ne Mari-chan?” Kojima Haruna plops down the seat in front of Mariko at the bar counter. Haruna is her closest friend and most loyal customer. The employees are quite fond of her, especially Yuko (much to Mariko annoyance. The squirrel needs to stop groping), and they don’t mind when sometimes, on very busy days, she offers to help out. Riku makes for an adorable waiter, albeit a bit airheaded.
The tall woman closes the ledger and stretches her arms upwards.
“Too tiresome, Nyaro. Thanks for helping out today.” Mariko yawns, resting her head and arms on the counter. “Massage me?”
“You’re welcome, Mari-chan.” Haruna giggles, fingers beginning to knead the tired barista’s head. “You know, Mario-kun would be more handsome if his hair was a bit messier. And maybe a little ponytail would be cute too.”
“You think so? I’ll take that into consideration then.”
The two women chuckle.
“Mari-chan,” The catlike girl starts, ”You sure you need to hire more help? I can always have my photo shoots rescheduled on less busy days. And if I have to I can take up less offers...” She begins to play with the Mariko’s short hair.
“Nah, I’d love to see you in more Peach John underwear.” That, and the model had a tendency to mess up on orders.
Haruna pulls on a stray lock. Hard.
“Ow!”
“You and Yuuchan are both perverts!”
Yuuchan? Mariko frowns.
Since when did Yuko become Yuuchan?Before she can question Haruna, the door chime rings.
~~~
Oshima Yuko had just finished wiping all the tables with Sae and Sayaka when she hears the chimes at the entrance. She turns to look at the newcomer.
It is a young girl, a little shorter than her, dressed in baggy jeans and a loose shirt, with long hair and a ridiculous giant red ribbon on her head. She had red puffy eyes and a thousand-watt smile on her face. Cute.
“Sorry kid,” she smiles politely, "But we’re already closed for the day.”
The grin is instantly wiped off the stranger’s face.
“Ehh? I’m not a kid! I’m already twenty-two!”
“Really? My apologies. Your height made me think otherwise.” The polite smile turns into an amused smirk.
“Oi! You’re not that tall either, mister!”
Mister? Oh, I haven’t taken it off yet. Yuko removes the short wig from her head, to the other girl’s shock.
“EHHHH?!”
Her two buddies snicker in the background.
The shorter girl points at the squirrel with wide eyes and shaking hands.
“You! Y-you’re a girl!”
“Yes! Y-yes I’m a girl!”
“No way!”
“Yes way, midget!”
“I AM NOT A MIDGET!” The shorter one roars.
The two midgets are promptly whacked in the head by Haruna.
“Ow!”
“That’s enough you two.”
The tall duo now clutch their stomachs, howling with laughter.
“Gomen, Nyannyan~” Yuko hugs Haruna tightly and rubs her head on the taller woman’s gifted chest, making the latter’s face go red.
“Y-yuuchan!”
“Ow!”
Mariko hits Yuko’s head.
The squirrel glares at her boss, but the sadistic look in Mariko’s eye makes her wither a little.
The dark aura surrounding the short-haired woman earlier disappears when her attention shifts to the new arrival. The midget stands nervously as the café owner inspects her, while the other four people left in the café keep quiet.
For a long moment, silence reigns over the warm wooden interior of café Ricori.
Then, finally, with a most serious expression on her face, Shinoda Mariko opens her mouth.
“Your name?”
“Takahashi Minami desu.”
“Need a job?”
A fervent nod.
“Ever worked at a restaurant? Café?”
A shake of the head.
“Ever crossdressed before?”
Another shake.
“As you now know, this is a danso café. You will have to dress up as a man.”
Another nod, though reluctant.
Mariko smiles.
“Alright. Place opens at nine. Come earlier. Tomorrow’s a weekday, so it won’t be as busy. We can show you the ropes.”
Minami’s eyes widen in realization and her lips start to tremble. Quickly she bows down before anyone sees the wetness forming in her eyes.
“T-Thank you so much—”
“YOSSHAAAA!!!”
The crazy trio rushes to her like old friends, with Sae ruffling Minami’s hair, Yuko trying to get on her back and the calmer Sayaka laying a hand on the shortest girl’s shoulder. The woman with chiseled features grins at Minami.
“Welcome to our cozy little family.”
“Geez Sayaka you’re makin’ this too cheesy—OW! This is the third time goddammit!”
Haruna and Mariko watch on in amusement as the others laugh at Yuko, a mysterious smile adorning the café owner’s face.
The spice had arrived.
I should thank the old man later.~~
Akimoto Yasushi glances at the clock on the wall as he finishes up his late night snack in the apartment complex lobby.
It is 10:48 PM.
He places the empty bento box on the coffee table with three other empty boxes and wonders if the girl is successful.
His phone begins to vibrate.
“Ohayo! V E G E—“
Click.
“Yes?”
“Yo Yasujii~”He snorts.
“You dare call your old landlord like that?”
“Maybe if you get those units renovated I’ll think of a better nickname, stingy old man.”
“Hmph. So how did it go?”
“She found us. Eventually. I had thought you sent a kid just to mess with me. I didn’t know she’d be that short. And that ribbon too. I think Yuko mistook her for a middle school student.” The voice on the other line laughs. Yasushi chuckles along.
“Has she left?”
“Yep. More than an hour ago.”Ah. The girl should almost be home then.
“JIISAN! I! GOT! A! JOB! IN! AKIBA!”
Speak of the devil.
Minami had entered the lobby like a triumphant yankee, with a shit-eating grin that could wolf down a septic tank all by itself.
“I got a job in Akihabara.” The girl exclaims. He gives her a thumbs up. Minami raises an arm in victory and goes up the stairs.
“I take it Takamina’s just arrived?”The chubby landlord hums in agreement. Calling the ribbon girl by her nickname already? Akimoto is not surprised. Mariko and her friends are a friendly bunch after all.
“I do wonder, though, how you got other shops to refuse Minami.”
“Hm? What do you mean?”He blinks.
“Mariko, it is impossible that your café was the only one offering a job today.”
“…Huh. I never thought about that. Anyway, Yasujii, I still have feed my dogs. It was nice talking to you. And…thanks a lot, old man. You’re still stingy though. Ja!”
Click.
Yasushi blinks again.
For a moment, he speculates the possibility that his old tenant and friend is Lady Luck herself.
His stomach rumbles.
The man pats his big belly and starts to make his way to the nearest konbini.
Hopefully they still have some half-priced bento.
~owari~I seem to have inadvertently created the beginnings of a love triangle...

Sooooo...
Suggestions? Criticisms? Flames? I'd gladly accept any. It is the best way to grow as a writer after all.
If there are any mistakes, do let me know. ^^